WEBVTT 00:00:12.840 --> 00:00:16.160 Welcome back to Know Manual a Momcast. We are 00:00:16.160 --> 00:00:19.460 here to share stories of moms, the reality of 00:00:19.460 --> 00:00:22.019 motherhood and parenting, the laughs, the cries, 00:00:22.280 --> 00:00:27.300 all of it. Today we have on Mellie who if you 00:00:27.300 --> 00:00:29.879 need a hype girl for motherhood, it's Mellie. 00:00:30.519 --> 00:00:33.299 She's oh, I mean, she's had kids longer than 00:00:33.299 --> 00:00:35.579 I have. So any time I've been pregnant, she's 00:00:35.579 --> 00:00:39.119 just so excited and such a great support. So 00:00:39.119 --> 00:00:42.000 she's super fun. Mellie, would you like to introduce 00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:45.759 yourself? Hi, I'm Mellie. I'm a stay at home 00:00:45.759 --> 00:00:49.560 mom of four boys. I've been married to my husband 00:00:49.560 --> 00:00:52.740 for nine years. We just celebrated nine years 00:00:52.740 --> 00:00:55.359 at the end of February. So that's a huge win 00:00:55.359 --> 00:00:59.500 for us. Yeah. Cool. Well, we're excited to talk 00:00:59.500 --> 00:01:03.100 to you about your family and your experience 00:01:03.100 --> 00:01:06.000 with motherhood. We start every week with our 00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:08.689 momma once a week. Laura, do you wanna do your 00:01:08.689 --> 00:01:14.090 modeling? I would love to. So as most of you 00:01:14.090 --> 00:01:17.170 listeners know, I'm very pregnant at this point. 00:01:17.209 --> 00:01:20.730 So I'm 38 and a half weeks pregnant while we're 00:01:20.730 --> 00:01:26.030 recording this. And I am so tired, very tired. 00:01:26.510 --> 00:01:30.450 My body hurts. Every time I just have to move, 00:01:30.450 --> 00:01:33.709 I feel like there's a bowling ball in between 00:01:33.709 --> 00:01:37.930 my legs at this point. But really, my mom moment 00:01:37.930 --> 00:01:41.730 is like, I just feel like I was telling Erica, 00:01:41.870 --> 00:01:44.810 I feel like I'm in this fog right now, which 00:01:44.810 --> 00:01:48.090 I think is common at this point. Yeah, I feel 00:01:48.090 --> 00:01:50.769 like I've just like, not that I'm failing as 00:01:50.769 --> 00:01:53.510 a mom right now, but I feel like I'm just like 00:01:53.510 --> 00:01:56.239 kind of like dropping the ball. in certain areas. 00:01:56.900 --> 00:02:00.079 And so, like, one of the things with Colt, so 00:02:00.079 --> 00:02:05.900 he's 19 months, almost 20 months old, and I have 00:02:05.900 --> 00:02:09.020 just found, like, our screen time has been increasing 00:02:09.020 --> 00:02:12.039 just because I'm so tired. Like, I can't think 00:02:12.039 --> 00:02:15.039 of activities. I can't, like, I just don't have 00:02:15.039 --> 00:02:18.479 the energy. So, like, this morning, specifically 00:02:18.479 --> 00:02:21.300 this moment, we're, like, watching. the Minions 00:02:21.300 --> 00:02:24.439 movie. And I was like, yeah, I was like, you 00:02:24.439 --> 00:02:26.979 know what, buddy, let's just like sit down and 00:02:26.979 --> 00:02:29.139 watch a movie. And he's like at that age where 00:02:29.139 --> 00:02:32.560 he'll pay attention for like a little bit. But 00:02:32.560 --> 00:02:35.620 I turned it on and I just like conked out. I 00:02:35.620 --> 00:02:39.819 felt fast asleep and I woke up probably like, 00:02:39.860 --> 00:02:42.599 I don't know, 35 minutes later or something like 00:02:42.599 --> 00:02:44.340 that. He's still just sitting there watching 00:02:44.340 --> 00:02:46.599 it, like eating his crackers. And I was like, 00:02:46.960 --> 00:02:49.479 all right, buddy. But then I had this moment 00:02:49.479 --> 00:02:52.710 of like, gosh, what am I doing? And - My fear 00:02:52.710 --> 00:02:55.969 would have been that he would have just like 00:02:55.969 --> 00:02:58.050 wreaked havoc on the house or like jumped off 00:02:58.050 --> 00:03:00.629 the couch and broken himself or something. Yeah. 00:03:00.689 --> 00:03:02.530 Because that's for sure what Lloyd just does 00:03:02.530 --> 00:03:04.689 all the time anyways. Yeah. Oh my gosh. Well, 00:03:04.990 --> 00:03:07.590 usually he's, I mean, Cole is so reckless. So 00:03:07.590 --> 00:03:10.310 I was actually really surprised that he just 00:03:10.310 --> 00:03:12.569 like watched the movie for a bit. So that might 00:03:12.569 --> 00:03:16.409 be like a constant like movie that we turn on 00:03:16.409 --> 00:03:19.680 when I need just a moment, but - Really, my mom 00:03:19.680 --> 00:03:22.120 moment is like screen times increasing. I feel 00:03:22.120 --> 00:03:25.099 kind of bad about it, but it's just kind of like 00:03:25.099 --> 00:03:28.780 where I'm at right now. And, you know, I'm I 00:03:28.780 --> 00:03:32.060 got to give myself some grace. Yeah. The end 00:03:32.060 --> 00:03:35.300 of pregnancy is tough without a toddler and with 00:03:35.300 --> 00:03:37.639 a toddler. Yeah, the last four weeks feel like 00:03:37.639 --> 00:03:41.340 two years. Yeah, they really do. The whole rest 00:03:41.340 --> 00:03:44.319 of the pregnancy has flown by, but man, like 00:03:44.319 --> 00:03:47.800 36 to 38 and a half weeks right now. I'm just 00:03:47.800 --> 00:03:51.759 like, wow, this every day is like a year long. 00:03:52.680 --> 00:03:55.939 Yeah. Yeah. What about you, Erica? My mom moment 00:03:55.939 --> 00:03:58.560 is recording this right after daylight savings, 00:03:59.080 --> 00:04:00.879 which, of course, just like throws everyone off, 00:04:01.020 --> 00:04:03.919 even though like, yes, Lloyd slept in, you know, 00:04:04.000 --> 00:04:05.759 sort of. We still got less sleep. Everyone's 00:04:05.759 --> 00:04:07.919 grumpy. So Sunday we're like, hey, we're going 00:04:07.919 --> 00:04:11.139 to the park. Get energy out like. out of the 00:04:11.139 --> 00:04:12.500 house, it was a beautiful day, blah, blah, blah. 00:04:13.099 --> 00:04:14.960 And we were like clearly getting to the end of 00:04:14.960 --> 00:04:17.060 our ropes, like, hey, you know, we'll take our 00:04:17.060 --> 00:04:18.759 time walking back to the car, trying to like 00:04:18.759 --> 00:04:20.639 waste as much time as possible outside of the 00:04:20.639 --> 00:04:23.639 house. And he wanted to run into a drainage ditch, 00:04:23.959 --> 00:04:26.300 you know, as you do that one and a half. And 00:04:26.300 --> 00:04:29.100 I wouldn't let him. And it was just like an immediate 00:04:29.100 --> 00:04:31.560 tantrum that he was not allowed to run into the 00:04:31.560 --> 00:04:34.060 drainage ditch. I was like, OK, it is time to 00:04:34.060 --> 00:04:37.310 go home now because. He's done. We've lost it. 00:04:37.769 --> 00:04:41.889 We're all over it. That's hilarious. Mellie, 00:04:41.930 --> 00:04:44.170 what's your mom moment this week? I feel like 00:04:44.170 --> 00:04:46.329 mine also has to do with daylight savings time 00:04:46.329 --> 00:04:48.970 because I have two older kids. They're seven 00:04:48.970 --> 00:04:52.509 and six and they are just bananas this week. 00:04:52.829 --> 00:04:55.269 Like they're literally bouncing off the walls. 00:04:55.670 --> 00:04:58.350 Yesterday my six year old like literally ran 00:04:58.350 --> 00:05:02.199 full force into the wall and I'm just like. Buddy, 00:05:02.360 --> 00:05:05.120 what are you doing? Like, why are you acting 00:05:05.120 --> 00:05:07.199 like this? And they're just... And Marley's your 00:05:07.199 --> 00:05:09.579 calm kid. Yeah, he's pretty mellow. So for him 00:05:09.579 --> 00:05:13.160 to be acting like wild this week and like they're 00:05:13.160 --> 00:05:15.420 kind of all like feeding off each other's energy. 00:05:15.600 --> 00:05:18.339 And then like my one year old is like confused 00:05:18.339 --> 00:05:21.240 because his nap time is like adjusted due to 00:05:21.240 --> 00:05:23.120 daylight savings time. And then like we're getting 00:05:23.120 --> 00:05:24.839 ready for bedtime. And they're like, but it's 00:05:24.839 --> 00:05:28.160 still daytime outside of like... Okay, but it's 00:05:28.160 --> 00:05:30.819 also like eight o 'clock. I get it. Like the 00:05:30.819 --> 00:05:32.980 sun's still shining. We have exhausted and you 00:05:32.980 --> 00:05:34.920 need to go to bed. Yeah, we've been up since 00:05:34.920 --> 00:05:38.060 like 6 45. Like we need to start like kind of 00:05:38.060 --> 00:05:40.279 dialing it down. My older two kids obviously 00:05:40.279 --> 00:05:42.980 don't take naps. And then my two and a half year 00:05:42.980 --> 00:05:45.040 old is kind of transitioning out of naps. So 00:05:45.040 --> 00:05:48.819 I'm like, I've got three kids awake. pretty much 00:05:48.819 --> 00:05:52.839 all day, and it's just high energy. By dinnertime, 00:05:53.139 --> 00:05:56.319 I'm like, okay, severely overstimulated. I need 00:05:56.319 --> 00:05:59.680 to just step away for a minute. That's when Michael 00:05:59.680 --> 00:06:01.480 comes in and I'm like, all right, let's tag team 00:06:01.480 --> 00:06:04.199 here up. And then I just kind of like step back 00:06:04.199 --> 00:06:07.259 for like 10, 15 minutes, regain my breath, and 00:06:07.259 --> 00:06:10.399 then like finish bedtime, bath time, all of that 00:06:10.399 --> 00:06:12.740 good stuff. Wow, that's a long day. It's been 00:06:12.740 --> 00:06:15.860 a week. Yeah Yeah, I have to keep reminding myself 00:06:15.860 --> 00:06:17.720 that daylight savings was this week because I 00:06:17.720 --> 00:06:21.339 feel like Lloyd has been On another level. Yeah 00:06:21.339 --> 00:06:23.959 in everything like more tantrums more clingy. 00:06:24.279 --> 00:06:27.459 Yeah, we're tired It's crazy that an hour can 00:06:27.459 --> 00:06:30.160 like can do that because I feel that too That 00:06:30.160 --> 00:06:32.680 it's just like I feel all over the place. He 00:06:32.680 --> 00:06:37.399 feels all over the place It's wild. Yeah Not 00:06:37.399 --> 00:06:39.639 my fave. I'm not a fan of daylight savings at 00:06:39.639 --> 00:06:43.550 all. No either time Yeah, no. So Mellie, do you 00:06:43.550 --> 00:06:45.189 want to introduce your family? So you have four 00:06:45.189 --> 00:06:48.370 boys. I have four boys. My oldest is seven. That's 00:06:48.370 --> 00:06:52.170 Hendrix. And then I have Marlee. He's six. Zeppelin 00:06:52.170 --> 00:06:55.509 is two. And then Jackson is turning one on Sunday. 00:06:55.870 --> 00:07:03.029 Oh, yeah. So that's cool. And so seven. So you 00:07:03.029 --> 00:07:05.689 were married for a couple of years before. I 00:07:05.689 --> 00:07:08.089 was married for nine months before we got pregnant 00:07:08.089 --> 00:07:13.230 with Hendrix. So very quick. We went into our 00:07:13.230 --> 00:07:16.509 marriage thinking that I was medically unable 00:07:16.509 --> 00:07:20.550 to have kids. So that one definitely caught us 00:07:20.550 --> 00:07:24.370 off guard. We were like, okay, that's so weird 00:07:24.370 --> 00:07:27.290 that we were even able to have Hendrix so easily. 00:07:27.850 --> 00:07:30.810 It felt like it was easy, but it was like... 00:07:30.889 --> 00:07:33.730 Okay, this is very early on in our marriage. 00:07:34.009 --> 00:07:36.170 Like, we don't really, like, know each other 00:07:36.170 --> 00:07:38.990 that well yet. We hadn't lived together or anything 00:07:38.990 --> 00:07:42.189 like that. We met in Bible college, so we very 00:07:42.189 --> 00:07:45.069 much were, like, PG -13 going into our relationship. 00:07:46.790 --> 00:07:51.410 And then we had Marley. So we had 202 the first 00:07:51.410 --> 00:07:53.730 go -around, and then we did, like, a three -year 00:07:53.730 --> 00:07:56.720 break in between Marley and Zeppelin. And then 00:07:56.720 --> 00:07:59.420 we did two under two all over again, which I'm 00:07:59.420 --> 00:08:01.860 like, we knew what we were doing the first time 00:08:01.860 --> 00:08:03.939 the second time around. I'm like, dang, this 00:08:03.939 --> 00:08:06.199 is a little bit harder because now we have like 00:08:06.199 --> 00:08:08.800 the two older kids. Right. Yeah. Like I don't 00:08:08.800 --> 00:08:10.879 get to take a nap when you two are napping. No, 00:08:11.079 --> 00:08:13.360 it's like I have to be going like pretty much 00:08:13.360 --> 00:08:16.519 all day every day. So. So was it intentional 00:08:16.519 --> 00:08:18.800 to have that big gap or did it just work out 00:08:18.800 --> 00:08:21.879 that way? So with Marlee, after we had Marlee, 00:08:21.920 --> 00:08:24.399 we kind of thought that we were done. And then 00:08:24.399 --> 00:08:27.639 I would say about a year and a half after we 00:08:27.639 --> 00:08:29.579 had Marlee, we had another friend that had a 00:08:29.579 --> 00:08:32.019 baby and she was kind of like working from home, 00:08:32.120 --> 00:08:34.259 but she would like bring her baby for like meetings 00:08:34.259 --> 00:08:35.940 and stuff. And that's when Michael would start 00:08:35.940 --> 00:08:38.340 coming home and being like, oh, my gosh, her 00:08:38.340 --> 00:08:40.879 daughter is like cooing and she's so sweet. And 00:08:40.879 --> 00:08:44.179 he kind of like planted the seed of like. maybe 00:08:44.179 --> 00:08:47.740 we have a third baby. And then I feel like Michael 00:08:47.740 --> 00:08:50.460 manifested Zeppelin because he just kept on bringing 00:08:50.460 --> 00:08:52.919 it up. He was like, but like, what if we had 00:08:52.919 --> 00:08:55.519 a third? I'm like, Michael, for real, let's just 00:08:55.519 --> 00:08:59.039 chill for a little bit. And Michael doesn't seem 00:08:59.039 --> 00:09:00.879 like the baby guy. Like if you just like met 00:09:00.879 --> 00:09:04.360 him, you would never assume he was I don't say 00:09:04.360 --> 00:09:06.419 baby crazy, but that like he would get baby fever 00:09:06.419 --> 00:09:08.220 in any capacity. You would assume that he was 00:09:08.220 --> 00:09:10.570 just like. Yeah, we have kids and that's it. 00:09:10.570 --> 00:09:12.909 Yeah, pretty much. It was it kind of caught me 00:09:12.909 --> 00:09:15.470 off guard when he was like pining for a third 00:09:15.470 --> 00:09:18.110 baby. I'm like, dude, for real, let's just enjoy 00:09:18.110 --> 00:09:20.210 the two while we have the two for now. Yeah. 00:09:20.490 --> 00:09:22.389 Then did you feel like after the third, you're 00:09:22.389 --> 00:09:25.909 like, well, we got to have a fourth because then 00:09:25.909 --> 00:09:28.289 they can have a little buddy. Yeah. So my mom 00:09:28.289 --> 00:09:30.929 had three kids. She had my older brother and 00:09:30.929 --> 00:09:32.490 then me and then my younger brother. And she 00:09:32.490 --> 00:09:35.029 always told me that if I had three kids like. 00:09:35.149 --> 00:09:37.750 push for the fourth kid, just because there was 00:09:37.750 --> 00:09:40.090 always like one of us that was like left out. 00:09:40.429 --> 00:09:42.990 Like my older brothers are super athletic and 00:09:42.990 --> 00:09:47.789 I'm obviously not. So that always kind of like 00:09:47.789 --> 00:09:50.129 left me off to like doing my own thing and like 00:09:50.129 --> 00:09:54.149 becoming kind of independent as like my own entity. 00:09:54.149 --> 00:09:57.529 And now I have like my two younger kids kind 00:09:57.529 --> 00:09:59.330 of grouped together and then the two older kids 00:09:59.330 --> 00:10:01.090 kind of grouped together. So it's nice when they're 00:10:01.090 --> 00:10:05.950 like separated because I get the the differentiating 00:10:05.950 --> 00:10:07.970 of the little kid stuff and then like the older 00:10:07.970 --> 00:10:10.549 kid activities. Yeah, yeah when Stuart and I 00:10:10.549 --> 00:10:13.470 have talked about it I was mentioning how all 00:10:13.470 --> 00:10:16.210 of the families that I know as adults who I've 00:10:16.210 --> 00:10:18.809 like just known them as adults or I've known 00:10:18.809 --> 00:10:21.610 them like since we were kids who have four kids 00:10:21.610 --> 00:10:24.289 they're really close as adults like I can think 00:10:24.289 --> 00:10:26.210 of multiple families off the top of my head who 00:10:26.210 --> 00:10:28.950 have four kids and I'm like two of them are always 00:10:28.950 --> 00:10:31.230 hanging like at least on social media, you know, 00:10:31.309 --> 00:10:33.129 not necessarily see them in real life all the 00:10:33.129 --> 00:10:35.470 time. Yeah. But from what I can tell, at least 00:10:35.470 --> 00:10:37.389 two of them are always hanging out in some capacity 00:10:37.389 --> 00:10:41.750 and it's never necessarily the same two. So I 00:10:41.750 --> 00:10:44.250 feel like four is good. Like seems like a good 00:10:44.250 --> 00:10:46.370 combination. I could be totally wrong. I don't 00:10:46.370 --> 00:10:49.049 have four kids yet. So it is chaos sometimes. 00:10:49.250 --> 00:10:51.429 But when they're all getting along, it's like, 00:10:51.529 --> 00:10:54.009 OK, this is nice. Like this could be this could 00:10:54.009 --> 00:10:55.870 be like a good thing when they're all older. 00:10:56.120 --> 00:10:59.360 Yeah. Yeah. Do you feel like the transition from 00:10:59.360 --> 00:11:02.620 like zero to one, one to two, two to three, or 00:11:02.620 --> 00:11:05.820 three to four was the hardest? The hardest was 00:11:05.820 --> 00:11:08.100 definitely two to three just because we took 00:11:08.100 --> 00:11:11.720 that like longer age gap. And then Marlee actually 00:11:11.720 --> 00:11:15.519 like breastfed for so long. Like he would not, 00:11:15.980 --> 00:11:18.120 he would not just not breastfeed. That was like 00:11:18.120 --> 00:11:20.059 his comfort. Like he was like two and a half 00:11:20.059 --> 00:11:22.159 and still like breastfeeding. I'm like, okay, 00:11:22.320 --> 00:11:26.090 buddy, let's. Let's get off of this. Yeah, kind 00:11:26.090 --> 00:11:28.389 of. I'm like, you can't be like doing that for 00:11:28.389 --> 00:11:30.450 like nap time. So we had to kind of transition. 00:11:30.909 --> 00:11:33.450 So he only knew that he was the baby for like 00:11:33.450 --> 00:11:35.250 three years. And then we brought home another 00:11:35.250 --> 00:11:38.029 baby and he's like, that's not my brother. People 00:11:38.029 --> 00:11:40.210 at church would ask him like, hey, Marlee, how 00:11:40.210 --> 00:11:41.690 do you like being an older brother? And he's 00:11:41.690 --> 00:11:43.529 like, that's not my brother. And he's like, I 00:11:43.529 --> 00:11:45.549 only have Hendrix. And I'm like. Marley, they 00:11:45.549 --> 00:11:48.549 can't see that. That's so mean. But like at three, 00:11:48.690 --> 00:11:51.029 you can't really like control what a three year 00:11:51.029 --> 00:11:53.049 old says. They just say some off the wall stuff 00:11:53.049 --> 00:11:56.809 sometimes. And he's like, yeah. So the transition 00:11:56.809 --> 00:11:59.909 from three to four was so easy. I felt like it 00:11:59.909 --> 00:12:02.730 was like breathing at some point. And then the 00:12:02.730 --> 00:12:04.870 transition from one to two is also pretty easy. 00:12:04.950 --> 00:12:07.330 Just like the jump from like two to three. And 00:12:07.330 --> 00:12:09.649 it's like, OK, we're like for real doing this. 00:12:09.789 --> 00:12:12.509 It was your outnumbered. Yeah. Yeah. I don't 00:12:12.509 --> 00:12:14.649 have enough hands for this. I feel like a centaur 00:12:14.649 --> 00:12:17.110 sometimes because I need like another set of 00:12:17.110 --> 00:12:22.149 arms coming out of my sides. It's crazy sometimes. 00:12:22.610 --> 00:12:25.350 Well, tell us, tell us about your boys and like 00:12:25.350 --> 00:12:27.450 their personalities. How are they different from 00:12:27.450 --> 00:12:31.129 each other? How are they similar? So it's pretty 00:12:31.129 --> 00:12:33.169 funny because we say that we have like two sets 00:12:33.169 --> 00:12:36.330 of twins. and not in the way that you would think. 00:12:36.549 --> 00:12:38.289 So my seven -year -old and my two -year -old 00:12:38.289 --> 00:12:41.909 have very similar wild and crazy off -the -wall 00:12:41.909 --> 00:12:44.929 personalities. They're always the louder ones. 00:12:45.110 --> 00:12:48.750 They're usually talking above a decibel that's 00:12:48.750 --> 00:12:51.970 acceptable most of the time. They're the crazy 00:12:51.970 --> 00:12:55.269 ones. And then my six -year -old and my one -year 00:12:55.269 --> 00:12:57.129 -old have very similar personalities. They're 00:12:57.129 --> 00:13:00.230 more like... gingerly approaching things. They 00:13:00.230 --> 00:13:02.450 don't like loud sounds. They don't really like 00:13:02.450 --> 00:13:04.509 being around people that are like super high 00:13:04.509 --> 00:13:06.889 energy. So they're always like, butting heads 00:13:06.889 --> 00:13:09.830 with the kids that are super high energy. So 00:13:09.830 --> 00:13:12.289 like when they branch off, it's usually the seven 00:13:12.289 --> 00:13:14.149 year old and the two year old, they kind of branch 00:13:14.149 --> 00:13:16.509 off together. And then I usually have my six 00:13:16.509 --> 00:13:18.519 year old and my one year old. they're kind of 00:13:18.519 --> 00:13:20.659 like playing nicely together. So it's kind of 00:13:20.659 --> 00:13:23.519 like seeing a weird dynamic. It's like having 00:13:23.519 --> 00:13:26.779 the same kid all over again with my two and one 00:13:26.779 --> 00:13:29.039 year old. Yeah. I feel like that's kind of like 00:13:29.039 --> 00:13:32.639 a good balance. Yeah. In a sense. Yeah. So like 00:13:32.639 --> 00:13:35.240 my seven year old is definitely more on the like, 00:13:35.639 --> 00:13:38.139 he's like very strong willed, very independent. 00:13:38.360 --> 00:13:40.659 He always wants to like do things on his own. 00:13:41.039 --> 00:13:43.500 And like he's got like a fourth grade reading 00:13:43.500 --> 00:13:45.759 level just because he likes playing video games. 00:13:45.779 --> 00:13:48.659 So he likes to like he's like learning new words 00:13:48.659 --> 00:13:50.299 and learning all these things. And he's kind 00:13:50.299 --> 00:13:52.899 of like showing his younger brothers. This is 00:13:52.899 --> 00:13:56.240 how we behave kind of thing. And then like my 00:13:56.240 --> 00:13:59.879 second kid is just he kind of does off the wall 00:13:59.879 --> 00:14:02.320 stuff sometimes where it's like if you see something 00:14:02.320 --> 00:14:04.940 that's like, huh, that looks strange. It was 00:14:04.940 --> 00:14:07.259 definitely Marley that did it. And then like 00:14:07.259 --> 00:14:09.639 obviously the two year old does. two -year -old 00:14:09.639 --> 00:14:12.919 things so it's funny to watch all of their like 00:14:12.919 --> 00:14:14.759 dynamics with each other and then when they're 00:14:14.759 --> 00:14:18.080 by themselves they kind of just like all do their 00:14:18.080 --> 00:14:21.240 own thing at one point so it's kind of it's kind 00:14:21.240 --> 00:14:24.559 of funny to see just how much they're alike and 00:14:24.559 --> 00:14:27.100 how different they are because like my older 00:14:27.100 --> 00:14:29.980 two kids they hang out sometimes but like my 00:14:29.980 --> 00:14:33.379 oldest is very like he can be a little on the 00:14:33.379 --> 00:14:35.580 aggressive side and my my second kid doesn't 00:14:35.580 --> 00:14:37.580 really appreciate that he's like you need to 00:14:37.580 --> 00:14:39.940 get out of my face get out of my bubble is what 00:14:39.940 --> 00:14:43.059 we call it he's like mama he's in my bubble and 00:14:43.059 --> 00:14:47.159 i'm like like hendrix Personal space, dude. Sometimes 00:14:47.159 --> 00:14:49.740 I'm like, we are all sharing one bubble right 00:14:49.740 --> 00:14:52.940 now, so you can't get mad that Hendrix is in 00:14:52.940 --> 00:14:55.200 your bubble, because you guys are all in my bubble. 00:14:55.799 --> 00:14:58.539 You're actually all in my bubble, so I need you 00:14:58.539 --> 00:15:03.559 to all get out of my bubble. That's funny. What 00:15:03.559 --> 00:15:07.879 do you think is the most difficult part? like 00:15:07.879 --> 00:15:11.700 having that age gap. I definitely forget sometimes 00:15:11.700 --> 00:15:14.019 that Zeppelin, he's my two year old, he's not 00:15:14.019 --> 00:15:17.019 as independent. Like he can't just go in the 00:15:17.019 --> 00:15:19.639 pantry and grab snacks as he pleases. And if 00:15:19.639 --> 00:15:22.159 he does, like he gets mad because he can't like 00:15:22.159 --> 00:15:24.360 immediately open it. Like he needs, he still 00:15:24.360 --> 00:15:26.679 needs that assistance. Whereas like my older 00:15:26.679 --> 00:15:29.200 two kids, they pretty much make their lunch every 00:15:29.200 --> 00:15:31.600 day. They're also homeschooled. So like they 00:15:31.600 --> 00:15:33.620 know that like once we're done with school, we 00:15:33.620 --> 00:15:36.019 get like an hour of quiet time. That's like. 00:15:37.179 --> 00:15:39.879 mandatory. We have to have at least an hour of 00:15:39.879 --> 00:15:43.100 quiet time. Probably for your sanity. Yeah, definitely 00:15:43.100 --> 00:15:45.919 for my sanity and also like they like to wake 00:15:45.919 --> 00:15:48.980 up the baby a lot and he's already had such an 00:15:48.980 --> 00:15:51.220 issue with growing and developmental stuff and 00:15:51.220 --> 00:15:53.919 I'm like he needs sleep to let grow and they 00:15:53.919 --> 00:15:56.320 kind of are starting to understand that okay 00:15:56.320 --> 00:15:58.340 we can't just wake up the baby because everybody 00:15:58.340 --> 00:16:01.399 else is awake. My older two are definitely more 00:16:01.399 --> 00:16:04.090 on the independent side. They like to do their 00:16:04.090 --> 00:16:07.009 own thing and occasionally they'll like ask me 00:16:07.009 --> 00:16:09.809 for help but usually I'm like super hands -on 00:16:09.809 --> 00:16:12.490 with my two and one -year -old. Just kind of 00:16:12.490 --> 00:16:15.169 like helping them do things, helping them navigate 00:16:15.169 --> 00:16:18.049 things and it's kind of like the shift in your 00:16:18.049 --> 00:16:20.409 brain that like has to happen because it's like 00:16:20.409 --> 00:16:22.649 I have two older kids that can pretty much fend 00:16:22.649 --> 00:16:25.549 for themselves at this point. My seven -year 00:16:25.549 --> 00:16:27.409 -old's almost eight now, so he's pretty much 00:16:27.409 --> 00:16:30.450 like, I don't need you anymore. He's like, I 00:16:30.450 --> 00:16:32.470 can ride my scooter by myself. It's like, all 00:16:32.470 --> 00:16:35.070 right, sick, dude, ride your scooter. They're 00:16:35.070 --> 00:16:36.870 like, cool, I need a break when someone doesn't 00:16:36.870 --> 00:16:40.970 need me. For sure. It's been so nice this week, 00:16:41.070 --> 00:16:42.590 so we've just been kind of letting them ride 00:16:42.590 --> 00:16:44.429 their scooter in the front yard, but then we 00:16:44.429 --> 00:16:46.110 have the one -year -old that likes to try and 00:16:46.110 --> 00:16:48.200 escape, and it's like... I have to keep eyes 00:16:48.200 --> 00:16:50.299 on him. I have to keep eyes on my two -year -old 00:16:50.299 --> 00:16:52.259 that's so curious right now. And he's wanting 00:16:52.259 --> 00:16:56.620 to get into everything. And he hasn't had his 00:16:56.620 --> 00:16:59.139 exploratory phase yet. Whereas the older two 00:16:59.139 --> 00:17:03.600 kids, they've explored. They know better, I guess. 00:17:03.799 --> 00:17:07.380 They kind of know what my limit is. And the two 00:17:07.380 --> 00:17:09.759 -year -old is just pushing it. He's like, OK, 00:17:09.819 --> 00:17:11.400 so this is your limit, but let's see if you can 00:17:11.400 --> 00:17:14.049 go a little farther. And I'm like... Alright, 00:17:14.109 --> 00:17:17.029 let's go a little farther. I didn't know I had 00:17:17.029 --> 00:17:20.390 a capacity past this, but apparently I do. Yes. 00:17:20.490 --> 00:17:22.750 Oh my gosh. Do you feel like Zeppelin is pushing 00:17:22.750 --> 00:17:24.950 limits more than your older boys did? Oh, totally. 00:17:25.150 --> 00:17:28.190 And I think he does it because everyone stops 00:17:28.190 --> 00:17:31.670 us because he is the only red -haired kid that 00:17:31.670 --> 00:17:34.109 I have. Oh, really? So I get stopped at the grocery 00:17:34.109 --> 00:17:36.210 store and they're like looking at me, looking 00:17:36.210 --> 00:17:38.269 at Michael, looking at Zeppelin and they're like, 00:17:38.910 --> 00:17:41.490 so where does the red hair come from? I get that. 00:17:41.529 --> 00:17:45.250 every day. I think this is so funny because when 00:17:45.250 --> 00:17:47.170 he was first like he had red hair from like the 00:17:47.170 --> 00:17:49.710 day he was born yeah from the get -go and everyone 00:17:49.710 --> 00:17:51.849 was like where did this come from but you both 00:17:51.849 --> 00:17:54.009 have black hair which is the same pigment as 00:17:54.009 --> 00:17:55.930 red hair and that's what i've tried to tell people 00:17:55.930 --> 00:17:57.950 from the beginning i'm like it's the same thing 00:17:57.950 --> 00:17:59.930 it just looks a little bit different like yeah 00:17:59.930 --> 00:18:02.769 it just yeah that's how jeans work is you can 00:18:02.769 --> 00:18:04.690 have if you have black hair you can have a redhead 00:18:04.690 --> 00:18:07.809 kid but also he doesn't He doesn't look as much 00:18:07.809 --> 00:18:09.569 like his brothers. And so the red hair throws 00:18:09.569 --> 00:18:11.910 it off, I think. Yeah, for sure. But we've had 00:18:11.910 --> 00:18:14.450 that conversation so many times. Or like at church, 00:18:14.569 --> 00:18:15.950 someone will be like, oh, where is Zeppelin's 00:18:15.950 --> 00:18:18.650 red hair from? Like, guys, this is how genetics 00:18:18.650 --> 00:18:22.410 work. They say that red hair skips a gene, too. 00:18:22.630 --> 00:18:26.140 So everyone always stops us and like. Zeppelin 00:18:26.140 --> 00:18:28.660 knows he's cute. So I think that he tries to 00:18:28.660 --> 00:18:31.059 get away with more stuff under the guise of like, 00:18:31.099 --> 00:18:34.599 oh, I'm cute. Maybe if I keep pushing my boundaries, 00:18:34.779 --> 00:18:37.220 like they'll let me because I'm cute, if that 00:18:37.220 --> 00:18:40.279 makes sense. And I'm like, buddy, at some point 00:18:40.279 --> 00:18:42.759 you're going to learn that this, this cuteness, 00:18:42.880 --> 00:18:44.819 he's got like this little scrunch in his nose 00:18:44.819 --> 00:18:47.859 right now when he smiles super big and he knows 00:18:47.859 --> 00:18:51.160 that he's cute. So he's just pushing all of his 00:18:51.160 --> 00:18:54.490 boundaries. My oldest... was like a year and 00:18:54.490 --> 00:18:56.369 a half when we had our second. So I think that 00:18:56.369 --> 00:18:59.690 he kind of realized that like the boundaries 00:18:59.690 --> 00:19:01.849 had already been pushed. Like there's already 00:19:01.849 --> 00:19:05.509 two of them. And he was actually like probably 00:19:05.509 --> 00:19:08.910 the easiest kid that I've had so far, even though 00:19:08.910 --> 00:19:12.269 he's so wild in his temperament. In what sense 00:19:12.269 --> 00:19:14.960 was he the easiest, would you say? I just feel 00:19:14.960 --> 00:19:18.279 like once once Marley was born he took on the 00:19:18.279 --> 00:19:21.819 role of a big brother like immediately like he 00:19:21.819 --> 00:19:24.119 immediately knew like this is my brother I will 00:19:24.119 --> 00:19:26.680 do anything to like keep him safe and he does 00:19:26.680 --> 00:19:28.940 such a good job being the oldest brother he takes 00:19:28.940 --> 00:19:31.819 that role so seriously, like sometimes a little 00:19:31.819 --> 00:19:34.500 too seriously. Like I can hear him like, Marlee, 00:19:34.720 --> 00:19:36.740 I told you not to do that. And I'm like, dude, 00:19:36.900 --> 00:19:39.279 you're not, you're not his parent. Like you don't 00:19:39.279 --> 00:19:42.640 have to do that. Like I'm here too. Like I can 00:19:42.640 --> 00:19:44.960 tell Marlee that he, he needs to back up a little 00:19:44.960 --> 00:19:48.640 bit. He's like, I'm helping my mom. He's like, 00:19:48.740 --> 00:19:52.039 I'm trying. That's so cute. Oh my gosh. I mean, 00:19:52.160 --> 00:19:55.089 that gives me hope as I'm like, you know, about 00:19:55.089 --> 00:19:59.089 to move into 202. What would you say was like 00:19:59.089 --> 00:20:03.130 the hardest part of 202? Because you did it twice. 00:20:03.250 --> 00:20:05.349 Yeah, I did it twice. I would definitely say 00:20:05.349 --> 00:20:09.180 as far as like schedules go. Just kind of through 00:20:09.180 --> 00:20:11.660 the whole schedule out the window when you have 00:20:11.660 --> 00:20:13.980 a newborn and you also have a toddler It's kind 00:20:13.980 --> 00:20:17.180 of like your tandem like nursing while also taking 00:20:17.180 --> 00:20:19.900 care of a toddler That's like running around 00:20:19.900 --> 00:20:22.920 and like obviously the baby sleeps more and then 00:20:22.920 --> 00:20:25.579 once the baby stops sleeping so much It's like, 00:20:25.759 --> 00:20:27.779 okay. Well now I have to find more things for 00:20:27.779 --> 00:20:30.839 us to like mentally engage them so that they're 00:20:30.839 --> 00:20:33.940 not just tearing up the house and running amok 00:20:33.940 --> 00:20:36.559 and all of that stuff. For sure. Yeah. I know 00:20:36.559 --> 00:20:40.099 I've found the hardest part so far is that like 00:20:40.099 --> 00:20:41.660 Lloyd's little enough that his attention span 00:20:41.660 --> 00:20:45.059 is like 30 seconds or whatever. And so if I have 00:20:45.059 --> 00:20:47.619 to like nurse or take care of Zeta or whatever 00:20:47.619 --> 00:20:50.799 that may be. I can't give him an activity because 00:20:50.799 --> 00:20:52.599 maybe he'll be interested in it. Sometimes you 00:20:52.599 --> 00:20:54.420 get that right activity and they're like, oh, 00:20:54.579 --> 00:20:56.559 I'll do this for half an hour. I'll throw this 00:20:56.559 --> 00:20:59.279 ball back at the wall for half an hour, whatever. 00:20:59.759 --> 00:21:02.200 And then other times you're like, oh, this activity 00:21:02.200 --> 00:21:04.839 that I set up and I was so excited for you to 00:21:04.839 --> 00:21:07.339 do, 10 seconds later they're like, eh, whatever. 00:21:08.220 --> 00:21:10.039 So that's been the hardest part for me is just 00:21:10.039 --> 00:21:14.259 keeping him entertained. And it's like, no, I 00:21:14.259 --> 00:21:17.509 really do have to do something else. Oh, gosh, 00:21:18.089 --> 00:21:19.990 like, yeah, feeding the baby or them learning 00:21:19.990 --> 00:21:22.410 that, like, OK, there's another little person 00:21:22.410 --> 00:21:25.730 that's here, like occupying mom's time. So that 00:21:25.730 --> 00:21:28.910 I feel like brought a lot of tantrums for my 00:21:28.910 --> 00:21:31.769 two year old because he was very confused. He's 00:21:31.769 --> 00:21:34.250 like, wait, like, I'm not the baby. Like, I'm 00:21:34.250 --> 00:21:35.829 not the one that's getting a lot of attention. 00:21:36.430 --> 00:21:39.309 His transition to being a big brother was like, 00:21:39.309 --> 00:21:43.460 OK, not as bad as Marley, but yeah. Yeah, it's 00:21:43.460 --> 00:21:45.960 just it's a whole world of different when you 00:21:45.960 --> 00:21:48.720 have like two, like having an infant and then 00:21:48.720 --> 00:21:51.420 having a toddler and then also having like two 00:21:51.420 --> 00:21:55.519 older kids. It's like the whole day is just occupied 00:21:55.519 --> 00:21:59.500 with their stuff. Gosh. Yeah. Would you say like 00:21:59.500 --> 00:22:01.940 being a stay at home mom, was that what you envisioned 00:22:01.940 --> 00:22:06.750 for your life? Originally? No. When we first 00:22:06.750 --> 00:22:09.730 got married, we were doing like the split income 00:22:09.730 --> 00:22:12.630 thing where I was I was working at a wedding 00:22:12.630 --> 00:22:15.430 chapel when we first met and he was working two 00:22:15.430 --> 00:22:18.049 jobs like he was doing church and then like he 00:22:18.049 --> 00:22:20.309 was working at Starbucks both part time. So we 00:22:20.309 --> 00:22:22.710 were we basically had like three part time jobs 00:22:22.710 --> 00:22:25.089 that we were like all juggling at the same time. 00:22:25.950 --> 00:22:28.450 It wasn't until we like moved out here and Michael 00:22:28.450 --> 00:22:31.109 kind of like found the work that he does now. 00:22:31.109 --> 00:22:34.130 He's been doing HVAC now for like Six years. 00:22:34.509 --> 00:22:37.549 Like, it's crazy. But when we first moved out 00:22:37.549 --> 00:22:39.670 here, we were looking at, like, the cost of childcare, 00:22:40.349 --> 00:22:44.650 and we realized that, like, even if I took a 00:22:44.650 --> 00:22:47.450 full -time position, all of my money would be 00:22:47.450 --> 00:22:50.130 going entirely to childcare. That's not diapers. 00:22:50.309 --> 00:22:53.289 That's not formula. That's literally just the 00:22:53.289 --> 00:22:55.589 time that he spends there. And we're kind of 00:22:55.589 --> 00:22:58.859 like... is that time more like valuable that 00:22:58.859 --> 00:23:01.240 we could like pour into our kids rather than 00:23:01.240 --> 00:23:05.019 like me having a job where he's also like, he's 00:23:05.019 --> 00:23:07.259 taking care of all of the bills like financially. 00:23:08.059 --> 00:23:09.980 Originally, when we first got married, I thought 00:23:09.980 --> 00:23:12.339 that I was going to be like this working woman 00:23:12.339 --> 00:23:14.759 forever. And then we left Vegas and that whole 00:23:14.759 --> 00:23:18.740 lifestyle was just kind of gone in like the blink 00:23:18.740 --> 00:23:23.819 of an eye. That would be, I mean, childcare is 00:23:23.819 --> 00:23:27.259 so... crazy expensive it's insane it is we've 00:23:27.259 --> 00:23:29.599 talked about this before i've just like it's 00:23:29.599 --> 00:23:33.140 it's not worth it a lot of the times i mean it 00:23:33.140 --> 00:23:36.619 can be in a sense but it's so crazy yeah and 00:23:36.619 --> 00:23:38.960 then when you have multiple kids too it's like 00:23:38.960 --> 00:23:42.420 okay this is only increasing so what do you want 00:23:42.420 --> 00:23:45.039 me to do here yeah pretty much the two under 00:23:45.039 --> 00:23:47.779 two both of them being in child care it's like 00:23:47.779 --> 00:23:50.660 okay so that's all of my income on just one kid 00:23:51.039 --> 00:23:53.420 plus some of his income that we're using for 00:23:53.420 --> 00:23:56.359 like our actual bills, like our mortgage, our 00:23:56.359 --> 00:24:00.440 cars, our everything like that. Was there any 00:24:00.440 --> 00:24:03.019 grief for you in like giving up being like the 00:24:03.019 --> 00:24:05.480 working woman life? Like, was that something 00:24:05.480 --> 00:24:07.680 that you had like envisioned enough then when 00:24:07.680 --> 00:24:09.920 you transitioned to like, no, I'll be staying 00:24:09.920 --> 00:24:11.579 home with the kids that you had to like actually 00:24:11.579 --> 00:24:13.559 process it? Or was it like, no, this is the thing 00:24:13.559 --> 00:24:16.160 that makes sense and I'm excited. It's definitely 00:24:16.160 --> 00:24:18.960 something that I feel like I mourned, especially 00:24:18.960 --> 00:24:22.019 once we left Vegas, because I feel like I was 00:24:22.019 --> 00:24:25.039 such this independent thinker, and then I felt 00:24:25.039 --> 00:24:27.920 like, okay, well now I don't have the independence 00:24:27.920 --> 00:24:30.440 of my finances, like I don't have the independence 00:24:30.440 --> 00:24:33.500 of like, I can go to lunch with my friends and 00:24:33.500 --> 00:24:35.740 know that like my kids are taken care of. It's 00:24:35.740 --> 00:24:40.799 like literally 24 -7 kid duty, basically. So 00:24:40.799 --> 00:24:43.240 I definitely feel like I mourned that. I had 00:24:43.240 --> 00:24:47.019 envisioned myself as like this working mom. But 00:24:47.019 --> 00:24:50.299 I'm also like glad in this season that we decided 00:24:50.299 --> 00:24:52.660 to do the stay at home mom life. Because once 00:24:52.660 --> 00:24:55.819 once we committed to that, it was like, OK, let's 00:24:55.819 --> 00:24:58.380 start talking about like the future. What is 00:24:58.380 --> 00:25:00.180 their schooling going to look like? Are we going 00:25:00.180 --> 00:25:01.859 to send them to public school? Are we going to 00:25:01.859 --> 00:25:04.519 do like a private school situation? Which also 00:25:04.519 --> 00:25:08.920 that's pretty expensive. So like we did the homeschooling 00:25:08.920 --> 00:25:11.380 route and we're three years into homeschooling 00:25:11.380 --> 00:25:14.500 now and it's something I would not trade for 00:25:14.500 --> 00:25:17.599 anything. What made you decide to homeschool? 00:25:17.980 --> 00:25:22.180 I think both my husband and I had a very negative 00:25:22.180 --> 00:25:25.539 encounter with public school. Like we both barely 00:25:25.539 --> 00:25:30.099 graduated. felt like we were barely pushing ourselves 00:25:30.099 --> 00:25:32.339 as far as like education goes. There's a lot 00:25:32.339 --> 00:25:34.619 of things that I feel Vegas is also like one 00:25:34.619 --> 00:25:37.500 of the worst as far as like education goes. So 00:25:37.500 --> 00:25:40.900 once we kind of like looked at all of our options 00:25:40.900 --> 00:25:43.259 as far as like homeschooling goes we were just 00:25:43.259 --> 00:25:46.039 kind of like you know this is what makes the 00:25:46.039 --> 00:25:48.779 most sense and we have a couple friends that 00:25:48.779 --> 00:25:51.259 have their kids in charter schools and they're 00:25:51.259 --> 00:25:54.420 also having issues with administration not taking 00:25:54.420 --> 00:25:58.980 bullying seriously. The rates of teen suicide 00:25:58.980 --> 00:26:02.059 is like insane right now. And a lot of that has 00:26:02.059 --> 00:26:05.700 to do with both social media and like their school 00:26:05.700 --> 00:26:08.000 environment. Like once they leave their school, 00:26:08.220 --> 00:26:11.019 like it's following them home with them. And 00:26:11.019 --> 00:26:13.400 we just kind of both didn't want that for our 00:26:13.400 --> 00:26:16.960 kids. Yeah. So do you guys follow some certain 00:26:16.960 --> 00:26:21.269 curriculum or do you kind of? do your own thing. 00:26:21.369 --> 00:26:24.069 How does that work? So it's kind of like a blend 00:26:24.069 --> 00:26:27.470 of both. We've been using this new, it's not 00:26:27.470 --> 00:26:30.529 new, but it's like new to us. It's Mia Academy 00:26:30.529 --> 00:26:32.930 and they basically like set up your curriculum 00:26:32.930 --> 00:26:37.430 for you. Nice. We do a four -day week rather 00:26:37.430 --> 00:26:39.170 than a five -day week because I just noticed 00:26:39.170 --> 00:26:42.470 that Friday, my oldest would, he was just done. 00:26:42.690 --> 00:26:44.509 He's like, I don't want to do this. So we do 00:26:44.509 --> 00:26:46.390 the four -day week rather than the five -day 00:26:46.390 --> 00:26:49.200 week. And a lot of schools like in our school 00:26:49.200 --> 00:26:52.140 district anyways do four days rather than five 00:26:52.140 --> 00:26:55.859 days because it's just like so much it's so much 00:26:55.859 --> 00:26:59.740 more like engaging also like I feel like he has 00:26:59.740 --> 00:27:02.579 more time to kind of like focus on the school 00:27:02.579 --> 00:27:05.500 that he's doing and focus on like his lessons 00:27:05.500 --> 00:27:07.960 when I feel like with homeschooling to I mean 00:27:07.960 --> 00:27:13.700 I was homeschooled and when you don't have like 00:27:14.009 --> 00:27:16.450 other people, like when you don't have a full 00:27:16.450 --> 00:27:20.230 class, you get your work done faster. You know, 00:27:20.230 --> 00:27:22.309 it's kind of like what everyone learned working 00:27:22.309 --> 00:27:24.069 from home where it's like most people aren't 00:27:24.069 --> 00:27:26.190 doing eight hours of work a day. For sure. It's 00:27:26.190 --> 00:27:27.789 that we have an eight hour work day. And so you 00:27:27.789 --> 00:27:29.490 feel that where I feel like homeschooling is 00:27:29.490 --> 00:27:32.329 very similar, where it's like you don't really 00:27:32.329 --> 00:27:35.470 have like this eight to nine hours of work plus 00:27:35.470 --> 00:27:38.009 homework. You have a certain amount of work that 00:27:38.009 --> 00:27:39.940 has to get done. And if you. can get it done 00:27:39.940 --> 00:27:43.059 in like four hours or four days or however that 00:27:43.059 --> 00:27:45.700 looks then you have all this extra free time 00:27:45.700 --> 00:27:48.299 is that's been my experience and so like that 00:27:48.299 --> 00:27:50.339 makes sense to me to only do four days a week. 00:27:50.980 --> 00:27:53.759 Yeah. We also kind of like incentivize our kids 00:27:53.759 --> 00:27:55.920 like they have their core classes and then they 00:27:55.920 --> 00:27:58.940 also have like classes that are they have extracurriculars 00:27:58.940 --> 00:28:01.700 that they can do so that kind of fills a little 00:28:01.700 --> 00:28:04.910 bit more time but I'm like, if you guys can focus, 00:28:05.130 --> 00:28:07.450 pay attention, we'll go do something fun. We'll 00:28:07.450 --> 00:28:09.930 go to the trampoline place. And usually, since 00:28:09.930 --> 00:28:12.349 we're homeschooled, we go midday and there's 00:28:12.349 --> 00:28:14.730 nobody there. So they pretty much get free rein 00:28:14.730 --> 00:28:17.829 of everything. And now the way that it is, there's 00:28:17.829 --> 00:28:22.109 so many moms choosing homeschooling that we're 00:28:22.109 --> 00:28:25.509 able to find somewhat of a community where they 00:28:25.509 --> 00:28:29.130 gather every month doing fun arts and crafts 00:28:29.130 --> 00:28:32.130 together with other kids that are also homeschooled. 00:28:32.119 --> 00:28:34.700 So it's not that like division of they're not 00:28:34.700 --> 00:28:37.400 getting socialized. Yeah, we had for me growing 00:28:37.400 --> 00:28:39.180 up, we had a homeschool group, but it was still 00:28:39.180 --> 00:28:41.400 very different. So it was like a very niche group 00:28:41.400 --> 00:28:44.819 of people who chose to homeschool when I was 00:28:44.819 --> 00:28:48.160 in that stage. Whereas now I feel like such a 00:28:48.160 --> 00:28:50.319 vast majority of people, especially since Covid 00:28:50.319 --> 00:28:52.940 have been like, oh, this is just easier that 00:28:52.940 --> 00:28:55.240 you have a much larger community and a much more 00:28:55.240 --> 00:28:57.859 diverse community of like, oh, no, we're all 00:28:57.859 --> 00:29:00.500 just homeschooling our kids. and this is yeah 00:29:00.500 --> 00:29:03.319 and your kids can like have a social life and 00:29:03.319 --> 00:29:05.319 meet all sorts of different people and people 00:29:05.319 --> 00:29:08.240 who have different experiences and can show them 00:29:08.240 --> 00:29:10.940 things like arts and crafts and yeah the kind 00:29:10.940 --> 00:29:13.769 of stuff that you maybe don't have time or energy 00:29:13.769 --> 00:29:15.609 to do at home, because it's less important than 00:29:15.609 --> 00:29:17.549 math and reading and that kind of stuff. Yeah, 00:29:17.630 --> 00:29:20.589 for sure. I was always jealous of the homeschool 00:29:20.589 --> 00:29:24.109 kids. I was a public school kid. I mean, I wanted 00:29:24.109 --> 00:29:26.829 to be homeschooled. You're also introverted, 00:29:27.170 --> 00:29:29.269 so I think it depends. Yeah, that's fair. I was 00:29:29.269 --> 00:29:32.349 the same way, public school. But once it got 00:29:32.349 --> 00:29:34.309 to high school, I was begging my mom. I was like, 00:29:34.369 --> 00:29:36.589 can I please do homeschooling? Because now I 00:29:36.589 --> 00:29:41.309 can do my own curriculum online. She's like, 00:29:41.450 --> 00:29:43.549 no, you need to be like socialized. And we obviously 00:29:43.549 --> 00:29:47.630 see how that turned out. Yeah. I feel like I 00:29:47.630 --> 00:29:51.049 just, I wanted to get my stuff done quicker than 00:29:51.049 --> 00:29:54.490 what the teachers would teach me. And so I just 00:29:54.490 --> 00:29:57.470 wanted to like do it at a faster pace. I like 00:29:57.470 --> 00:29:59.529 had great friends and stuff like that too. So 00:29:59.529 --> 00:30:01.950 I wouldn't trade that, but I don't know. I just 00:30:01.950 --> 00:30:03.750 felt like I wanted to get stuff done quicker. 00:30:03.849 --> 00:30:07.940 Yeah. Yeah. But What would you say is like the 00:30:07.940 --> 00:30:12.059 hardest part of parenting for you right now? 00:30:12.420 --> 00:30:15.720 It's definitely the sassiness from my older two 00:30:15.720 --> 00:30:19.700 boys because I feel like because they're so independent, 00:30:19.700 --> 00:30:22.180 like they don't understand why we're putting 00:30:22.180 --> 00:30:24.819 limits on certain things that they're either 00:30:24.819 --> 00:30:27.720 doing like my oldest will literally play Xbox 00:30:27.720 --> 00:30:30.259 all day and he gets so mad at me. He's like, 00:30:30.500 --> 00:30:32.119 well, why do I have to get off of it? And it's 00:30:32.119 --> 00:30:34.869 like, dude. It's nice outside. We're not going 00:30:34.869 --> 00:30:38.630 to spend all of our day just doing a bunch of 00:30:38.630 --> 00:30:43.890 Xbox activities. I've heard that it helps with 00:30:43.890 --> 00:30:47.049 them with becoming ambidextrous and stuff. He's 00:30:47.049 --> 00:30:50.470 learning how to use his left hand more. It kind 00:30:50.470 --> 00:30:53.250 of helps them their brain because he does a lot 00:30:53.250 --> 00:30:55.829 of puzzle games on Fortnite, which I'm like, 00:30:55.990 --> 00:30:59.109 okay, cool. Sweet, problem -solve. Yeah, but 00:30:59.109 --> 00:31:02.859 also... I notice that when we do increase his 00:31:02.859 --> 00:31:05.960 like screen time, that's when his attitude really 00:31:05.960 --> 00:31:09.059 comes out. And I'm not really, I'm kind of like 00:31:09.059 --> 00:31:12.160 a no BS kind of person. So like, usually when 00:31:12.160 --> 00:31:14.539 I deal with those attitudes, I'm very much coming 00:31:14.539 --> 00:31:17.319 at it from like, he's a kid, but also you got 00:31:17.319 --> 00:31:20.000 to understand that mama doesn't play that. I 00:31:20.000 --> 00:31:23.539 don't, I don't really like that. I don't really 00:31:23.539 --> 00:31:26.099 take attitudes very well. So usually when he 00:31:26.099 --> 00:31:29.920 gives it to me, I can. kind of direct him how 00:31:29.920 --> 00:31:32.640 to respond in a way that's respectful, because 00:31:32.640 --> 00:31:34.960 the moment he hits me with an attitude, I'm like, 00:31:35.059 --> 00:31:38.180 OK, we're done. Xbox is off. We're going to go 00:31:38.180 --> 00:31:40.559 to our room. We're going to do quiet time, because 00:31:40.559 --> 00:31:43.700 now you're at a point where your brain is at 00:31:43.700 --> 00:31:47.000 capacity and you don't understand that I'm doing 00:31:47.000 --> 00:31:51.799 this for you. Not to be mean, not to hurt your 00:31:51.799 --> 00:31:55.549 feelings, not to just like... I'm mom, I have 00:31:55.549 --> 00:31:58.029 to statement. No, like it's not about that. It's 00:31:58.029 --> 00:32:00.349 like recognizing when they're like at capacity 00:32:00.349 --> 00:32:03.309 and having to kind of guide them in a way that's 00:32:03.309 --> 00:32:05.690 also respectful. Cause I want them to respond 00:32:05.690 --> 00:32:09.289 to people, not just me, like everybody in a way 00:32:09.289 --> 00:32:11.390 that's like respectful, even if their boundaries 00:32:11.390 --> 00:32:14.200 are being pushed. You know what I mean? Yeah, 00:32:14.279 --> 00:32:17.400 he'll understand more as he gets older. And especially 00:32:17.400 --> 00:32:20.420 when he becomes a parent. Yeah, for sure. I see 00:32:20.420 --> 00:32:22.700 what my mom was doing there. She was right. Screen 00:32:22.700 --> 00:32:27.259 time was making me cranky. Yeah. What would you 00:32:27.259 --> 00:32:31.640 say is like your tactic with discipline right 00:32:31.640 --> 00:32:35.920 now? So I'm not like a spanker. Like that is 00:32:35.920 --> 00:32:39.849 something that I just I cannot do. We do. My 00:32:39.849 --> 00:32:41.890 brothers did baseball, so we do the three -strike 00:32:41.890 --> 00:32:44.309 rule. So, like, the first time is a warning. 00:32:44.470 --> 00:32:46.710 The second time, you go in time -out. The third 00:32:46.710 --> 00:32:49.809 time, I'm taking something that you love, whether 00:32:49.809 --> 00:32:52.190 it be the Switch, whether it be TV privileges, 00:32:52.750 --> 00:32:56.470 the Xbox. That is, like, you know that that is 00:32:56.470 --> 00:32:59.109 the final straw. And when they're in time -out, 00:32:59.130 --> 00:33:01.490 I'm kind of, like, talking to them about why 00:33:01.490 --> 00:33:03.549 they're there. They're not just sitting in time 00:33:03.549 --> 00:33:05.890 -out being like, ugh, mom's the worst. I can't 00:33:05.890 --> 00:33:08.289 believe she did this. It's like, no, dude, you 00:33:08.289 --> 00:33:10.190 got to understand. like you can't just hit your 00:33:10.190 --> 00:33:12.670 brother when he's in your face. You got to understand 00:33:12.670 --> 00:33:14.589 that like you can't be mean to the two -year 00:33:14.589 --> 00:33:16.549 -old because he doesn't understand why you're 00:33:16.549 --> 00:33:18.329 being mean to him. He just thinks that you're 00:33:18.329 --> 00:33:20.849 being mean to him. He doesn't know that like 00:33:20.849 --> 00:33:23.549 maybe he's in your face. He doesn't know that 00:33:23.549 --> 00:33:26.650 unless you tell him like Zeppelin. chill, you 00:33:26.650 --> 00:33:29.150 know what I mean? But they kind of get it one 00:33:29.150 --> 00:33:31.190 certain time out. They know that that is the 00:33:31.190 --> 00:33:34.049 last straw before I take something. My six year 00:33:34.049 --> 00:33:36.549 old, it's Legos. So I'll take away his Lego set 00:33:36.549 --> 00:33:39.170 that he's playing with at the time. Or they have 00:33:39.170 --> 00:33:41.170 these little like Minecraft building blocks. 00:33:41.210 --> 00:33:43.890 So it's always something that like you're going 00:33:43.890 --> 00:33:46.410 to get this back, but you need to understand 00:33:46.410 --> 00:33:49.329 why I took it and why you're being disciplined 00:33:49.329 --> 00:33:52.609 this way. It's not just something that like because 00:33:52.609 --> 00:33:56.700 I feel like my parents were very aggressive with 00:33:56.700 --> 00:33:58.819 their discipline. Like it was just immediate 00:33:58.819 --> 00:34:00.880 like spanking off the bat. And I don't feel like 00:34:00.880 --> 00:34:03.880 that teaches them anything aside from resentment. 00:34:04.220 --> 00:34:07.440 So I'm like, OK, we're not going to do that. 00:34:07.500 --> 00:34:11.019 That's if I have to like swat their hand, that's 00:34:11.019 --> 00:34:14.519 about as far as I'll go. Yeah. Whereas like our 00:34:14.519 --> 00:34:17.239 parents were more like loose with it. And they 00:34:17.239 --> 00:34:20.199 see me disciplining them in a way that's not 00:34:20.199 --> 00:34:22.480 the way that they disciplined us. And it's like, 00:34:23.300 --> 00:34:25.179 OK, well, why are you doing that? And it's like, 00:34:25.179 --> 00:34:27.980 Do you feel like they understand it? They definitely 00:34:27.980 --> 00:34:31.300 understand better. Like the next day after they 00:34:31.300 --> 00:34:33.960 get their stuff back, it's always like, OK, like 00:34:33.960 --> 00:34:36.639 I understand why she took that away. Yeah. And 00:34:36.639 --> 00:34:39.559 usually when Michael comes home, I'll kind of 00:34:39.559 --> 00:34:42.420 tell him like, hey, so and so doesn't have TV 00:34:42.420 --> 00:34:45.460 privileges. This is what they did. This is how 00:34:45.460 --> 00:34:47.239 long I told them that they can't have it. And 00:34:47.239 --> 00:34:49.780 then he kind of comes alongside me and he's kind 00:34:49.780 --> 00:34:51.960 of like, hey, you know, like we don't hit our 00:34:51.960 --> 00:34:55.329 brother or like. We don't play with toilet paper 00:34:55.329 --> 00:34:59.329 or whatever it may be that day that they needed 00:34:59.329 --> 00:35:02.210 something taken away because he knows that if 00:35:02.210 --> 00:35:04.829 I took something, that was the final straw for 00:35:04.829 --> 00:35:07.590 me. He knows that like, okay, I need to come 00:35:07.590 --> 00:35:10.250 alongside her, agree with her discipline because 00:35:10.250 --> 00:35:13.179 I feel like... A lot of times my parents didn't 00:35:13.179 --> 00:35:15.920 agree on discipline. So like, let's say my mom 00:35:15.920 --> 00:35:18.719 disciplined us in a way or my dad did. They would 00:35:18.719 --> 00:35:20.699 always be like, dad and be like, well, I'm going 00:35:20.699 --> 00:35:23.000 to go talk to mom and she'll give me exactly 00:35:23.000 --> 00:35:25.619 exactly that. Or like my dad would take something 00:35:25.619 --> 00:35:27.260 away and I would go to mom and she would kind 00:35:27.260 --> 00:35:29.320 of like side with me and she'd be like, well, 00:35:29.420 --> 00:35:30.980 you're not supposed to. And then they would get 00:35:30.980 --> 00:35:35.340 into like their tips over us and the way that 00:35:35.340 --> 00:35:37.539 they disciplined us. And I'm glad that we can 00:35:37.539 --> 00:35:40.289 at least agree. on the way that we discipline 00:35:40.289 --> 00:35:43.070 our kids and like come together in the middle 00:35:43.070 --> 00:35:45.289 and then kind of like talk to them together. 00:35:45.369 --> 00:35:47.969 Like if you don't agree with what went down, 00:35:48.010 --> 00:35:50.010 at least like then you talk about it later, like 00:35:50.010 --> 00:35:51.929 behind closed doors for sure. Hey, I don't think 00:35:51.929 --> 00:35:55.090 you should have taken Legos for that grievance 00:35:55.090 --> 00:35:58.809 or for sure. Yeah, exactly. Then like, yeah, 00:35:58.949 --> 00:36:01.309 being the united front in front of the kids and 00:36:01.309 --> 00:36:04.250 then dealing with whatever you may disagree with 00:36:04.250 --> 00:36:08.280 later is very different. And I think it. leads 00:36:08.280 --> 00:36:11.300 to like a more stable environment for the kids 00:36:11.300 --> 00:36:14.639 too. Cause this is just the rule and mom and 00:36:14.639 --> 00:36:16.679 dad, like you can't put mom and dad against each 00:36:16.679 --> 00:36:19.980 other no matter how hard you try. Do you feel 00:36:19.980 --> 00:36:22.079 like it took like a while for you and Michael 00:36:22.079 --> 00:36:27.159 to come to, I don't know, agreements on discipline 00:36:27.159 --> 00:36:29.260 or was it kind of like straight off the bat of 00:36:29.260 --> 00:36:31.539 like, this is how we're going to discipline. 00:36:31.800 --> 00:36:34.519 We're going to be on each other's teams. So I 00:36:34.519 --> 00:36:37.219 feel like Michael's definitely more of the aggressive 00:36:37.219 --> 00:36:39.539 one when it comes to disciplining them where 00:36:39.539 --> 00:36:42.420 I'm more like Hey, you probably shouldn't have 00:36:42.420 --> 00:36:45.019 talked to them like that But also like we don't 00:36:45.019 --> 00:36:47.940 do it in front of the kids ever usually if one 00:36:47.940 --> 00:36:50.840 of us is like taking charge of Disciplining like 00:36:50.840 --> 00:36:53.019 maybe he's at the end of his rope like he had 00:36:53.019 --> 00:36:55.639 a long day. He does HVAC So he's usually gone 00:36:55.639 --> 00:36:58.420 like 10 to 12 hours every day by the time he 00:36:58.420 --> 00:37:01.119 gets home. He's He's exhausted. He's passed the 00:37:01.119 --> 00:37:03.300 point of stimulated and we're just both dealing 00:37:03.300 --> 00:37:06.949 with the chaos that is dinner time, bath time, 00:37:07.090 --> 00:37:11.389 bedtime kind of thing. So I think at the beginning, 00:37:11.710 --> 00:37:14.769 we were kind of not in agreement with the whole 00:37:14.769 --> 00:37:18.210 like, I don't want to like spank our kids. We 00:37:18.210 --> 00:37:20.289 definitely let each other like discipline them 00:37:20.289 --> 00:37:23.659 the way that we feel fit. and I don't think that 00:37:23.659 --> 00:37:25.639 he would ever come at our kids in an aggressive 00:37:25.639 --> 00:37:29.099 way. He's just more like stern, like he's got 00:37:29.099 --> 00:37:31.679 the dad voice for sure. And it kind of like scares 00:37:31.679 --> 00:37:33.739 me sometimes. Like intimidating. I'm like, geez, 00:37:33.940 --> 00:37:36.320 okay, Michael. Am I in trouble? Yeah, exactly. 00:37:38.079 --> 00:37:41.400 That's funny. Okay, what would you say is the 00:37:41.400 --> 00:37:46.099 best part of parenting right now? So at dinnertime, 00:37:46.360 --> 00:37:49.920 we do like our highlight of the day. And we've 00:37:49.920 --> 00:37:52.380 been doing it for so long now that the boys like 00:37:52.380 --> 00:37:54.519 initiate it. Like we'll just sit down and Marley's 00:37:54.519 --> 00:37:56.920 like, okay, I'm ready to tell you about my favorite 00:37:56.920 --> 00:37:59.000 part of the day. And you can tell he's been thinking 00:37:59.000 --> 00:38:02.000 about it all day. And it's just, it's literally 00:38:02.000 --> 00:38:04.619 like my favorite part of every day is listening 00:38:04.619 --> 00:38:07.420 to their, their highlights of the day. Cause 00:38:07.420 --> 00:38:09.619 sometimes it's so random. Like sometimes it's 00:38:09.619 --> 00:38:11.800 like, we got ice cream today. And it's like, 00:38:12.579 --> 00:38:14.820 Okay, like that was a moment where I felt like 00:38:14.820 --> 00:38:17.980 I was failing as a mom, but they saw it as like, 00:38:18.019 --> 00:38:20.019 mom took us to get ice cream for lunch. But that 00:38:20.019 --> 00:38:22.260 was my like, we need to get out of the house. 00:38:22.340 --> 00:38:24.780 You guys are driving me mad. Let's go get the 00:38:24.780 --> 00:38:27.519 dollar ice cream cones from Dairy Queen and go 00:38:27.519 --> 00:38:31.860 sit outside for a minute and just breathe. And 00:38:31.860 --> 00:38:34.860 it's fun to see them kind of interact when Michael 00:38:34.860 --> 00:38:36.920 gets home because they're so excited to see him. 00:38:36.940 --> 00:38:39.489 And it's like. I don't get that excitement because 00:38:39.489 --> 00:38:41.590 I'm with them all day every day, but to see them 00:38:41.590 --> 00:38:44.789 excited to see him for the first time all day, 00:38:45.110 --> 00:38:48.610 it sparks a little bit of joy, you know? Even 00:38:48.610 --> 00:38:51.769 though... It's pure chaos. Yes. Yeah. Because 00:38:51.769 --> 00:38:54.110 they're all, all four usually talking to him 00:38:54.110 --> 00:38:55.949 at the same time. They're like, and we did this 00:38:55.949 --> 00:38:57.809 and we did this. And then the two year old's 00:38:57.809 --> 00:39:01.949 like, I play skate. And it's like, and the one 00:39:01.949 --> 00:39:04.269 year old's just like, just kind of like hanging. 00:39:05.690 --> 00:39:08.329 Yeah. And Michael's just like, I just got home. 00:39:08.949 --> 00:39:11.489 This is so much for walking in the door. He's 00:39:11.489 --> 00:39:12.929 like, I'm going to go upstairs for a minute. 00:39:12.949 --> 00:39:15.110 I'm like, yeah, you do you go decompress, take 00:39:15.110 --> 00:39:18.949 your 15 minutes. I got this. Yeah. Oh man. Well, 00:39:18.949 --> 00:39:21.750 that's so sweet. I'm sure with four boys, that 00:39:21.750 --> 00:39:24.730 sounds like absolute chaos. It is, yeah. But 00:39:24.730 --> 00:39:28.050 also you're living in like the sweetest moments 00:39:28.050 --> 00:39:30.389 of your life. For sure. Right now. And I think 00:39:30.389 --> 00:39:33.809 that's awesome. I'm sure, yeah, every day comes 00:39:33.809 --> 00:39:37.630 with its challenges and every day is just like, 00:39:37.750 --> 00:39:39.869 you get to hold on to these little moments too 00:39:39.869 --> 00:39:44.389 of all your boys playing together and also arguing 00:39:44.389 --> 00:39:48.280 with each other. Man. Yeah, I keep thinking about 00:39:48.280 --> 00:39:51.820 it because everyone always pulls to like or older 00:39:51.820 --> 00:39:53.840 parents always pull to like, well, you'll miss 00:39:53.840 --> 00:39:56.400 these years. And I think about it and like there 00:39:56.400 --> 00:39:57.760 are things that you miss. And then there are 00:39:57.760 --> 00:40:00.199 things are like, wow, I am so glad I'll never 00:40:00.199 --> 00:40:02.159 have to deal with that again. Yeah, I'm not looking 00:40:02.159 --> 00:40:04.480 forward to that again for next baby or whatever. 00:40:05.340 --> 00:40:09.539 So like it's such a weird duality. I'm sure still 00:40:09.539 --> 00:40:12.420 with like older kids were like, yeah, I'm not 00:40:12.420 --> 00:40:14.539 going to miss the sass. I might miss some of 00:40:14.539 --> 00:40:17.920 it, but like not the like we have to actually 00:40:17.920 --> 00:40:20.079 deal with this like the funny parts or you know 00:40:20.079 --> 00:40:23.440 seeing them interact or whatever. Okay what is 00:40:23.440 --> 00:40:26.360 something you would want to tell other moms? 00:40:27.079 --> 00:40:30.579 Do you have any advice or just a random thought? 00:40:31.179 --> 00:40:35.019 So I feel like with having four boys usually 00:40:35.019 --> 00:40:38.079 people see us and they're like woof you know 00:40:38.079 --> 00:40:43.099 and it's like yes but also We get the sweet little 00:40:43.099 --> 00:40:45.960 moments that like people don't see that my kids 00:40:45.960 --> 00:40:48.900 have where it's like my oldest being off the 00:40:48.900 --> 00:40:51.420 wall crazy and then he'll he'll stop and be like, 00:40:51.500 --> 00:40:54.159 Mama, I love you. And I'm like, oh, that's so 00:40:54.159 --> 00:40:57.059 sweet. Thank you, buddy. Yeah. It's not I don't 00:40:57.059 --> 00:40:59.699 feel like it's one size fits all. I've had so 00:40:59.699 --> 00:41:02.380 many parents give me so much advice. And I would 00:41:02.380 --> 00:41:05.519 say like probably a fourth of it was actually 00:41:05.519 --> 00:41:09.000 like useful. So it's always like take everything 00:41:09.000 --> 00:41:12.260 with like a grain of salt. Don't. compare your 00:41:12.260 --> 00:41:15.199 kids, even if you take them to doctor's appointments 00:41:15.199 --> 00:41:18.199 and they're like, well, your kid is in like the 00:41:18.199 --> 00:41:20.000 first percentile for like height and weight. 00:41:20.199 --> 00:41:22.920 And it's like that can be so like soul crushing 00:41:22.920 --> 00:41:27.860 and like so discouraging. But you're doing everything 00:41:27.860 --> 00:41:30.460 you can. Like you're not failing. There's nothing 00:41:30.460 --> 00:41:33.340 that you could do better or worse for any of 00:41:33.340 --> 00:41:35.739 your kids. They're all different. And you have 00:41:35.739 --> 00:41:38.179 to approach each of them. in the way that they 00:41:38.179 --> 00:41:41.039 like to be approached. My oldest is a little 00:41:41.039 --> 00:41:43.820 more aggressive, so I obviously come at him a 00:41:43.820 --> 00:41:47.539 little bit guns blazing. My second one is a little 00:41:47.539 --> 00:41:50.539 more ginger, so I know the voice inflections 00:41:50.539 --> 00:41:54.280 and everything that you just kind of learn. the 00:41:54.280 --> 00:41:56.599 different ways that your kid likes to communicate 00:41:56.599 --> 00:41:59.360 and you kind of also like see their love languages. 00:42:00.099 --> 00:42:03.199 My oldest is definitely not a quality time person, 00:42:03.619 --> 00:42:06.960 whereas like my second is very much a quality 00:42:06.960 --> 00:42:09.980 time. So you just kind of have to like, it's 00:42:09.980 --> 00:42:12.280 definitely like a learn as you grow kind of thing. 00:42:12.420 --> 00:42:15.099 It's not like I'm going to read this baby book 00:42:15.099 --> 00:42:17.880 and I'm going to be good. Like not a lot of the 00:42:17.880 --> 00:42:20.460 baby books are tailored to, it's more of like 00:42:20.460 --> 00:42:23.820 a broad statement. Whereas like your kid is an 00:42:23.820 --> 00:42:26.360 individual that shouldn't be treated as like 00:42:26.360 --> 00:42:29.440 a broad statement. Yeah, that's super interesting. 00:42:29.619 --> 00:42:33.039 It makes me think of like, you're just you're 00:42:33.039 --> 00:42:35.400 parenting differently. Like parenting styles 00:42:35.400 --> 00:42:37.800 are maybe different for each of your children 00:42:37.800 --> 00:42:41.260 because of their personalities. And yeah, I've 00:42:41.260 --> 00:42:43.960 never really never really thought of that a ton. 00:42:44.639 --> 00:42:48.000 Yeah. So we like to end our podcast with our 00:42:48.000 --> 00:42:50.820 win of the week. Can you think of yours, Erica? 00:42:51.119 --> 00:42:53.559 Yeah, I'll start. So Lloyd has just been super 00:42:53.559 --> 00:42:56.559 into hand holding lately. And it's so cute. Like, 00:42:56.940 --> 00:42:59.380 I don't know if it's just like part of his clingingness 00:42:59.380 --> 00:43:02.730 with. Is Aida coming home or what? But like he 00:43:02.730 --> 00:43:04.610 wants to hold hands walking across the kitchen 00:43:04.610 --> 00:43:07.150 or walking at the playground and just like all 00:43:07.150 --> 00:43:08.989 the time he just like lifts up his hand is like 00:43:08.989 --> 00:43:12.090 mama and wants to hold hands and it's just the 00:43:12.090 --> 00:43:14.010 sweetest thing in the world and I love it so 00:43:14.010 --> 00:43:18.750 much. That's so sweet. I love it. OK, my win. 00:43:19.409 --> 00:43:22.289 So this last weekend I was telling you guys I 00:43:22.289 --> 00:43:25.650 had like false some false labor. Thought I was 00:43:25.650 --> 00:43:29.679 going into labor. Turns out I wasn't. But during 00:43:29.679 --> 00:43:32.500 that whole time, like every contraction I had, 00:43:32.579 --> 00:43:35.079 I would have to just like close my eyes for a 00:43:35.079 --> 00:43:38.699 second and take some deep breaths. And Colt was 00:43:38.699 --> 00:43:42.679 like super just super worried, super empathetic, 00:43:42.840 --> 00:43:44.860 would come up like really close to my face and 00:43:44.860 --> 00:43:49.000 just like stare into my eyes, which I thought 00:43:49.000 --> 00:43:52.599 was like, I don't know, it's just he was so empathetic 00:43:52.599 --> 00:43:56.659 and it made me just feel, I don't know, feel 00:43:56.659 --> 00:43:59.460 good about my parenting. In some sense, I don't 00:43:59.460 --> 00:44:02.280 know if I did anything to like make him be that 00:44:02.280 --> 00:44:05.559 way. But yeah, it was just super sweet. I'm like 00:44:05.559 --> 00:44:07.300 a little bit nervous about when I actually go 00:44:07.300 --> 00:44:09.659 into labor because I know it'll be more intense 00:44:09.659 --> 00:44:13.440 than that. But yeah, it just was a really sweet 00:44:13.440 --> 00:44:16.309 little like. time even though I was in pain. 00:44:17.289 --> 00:44:20.369 I love seeing little kids show empathy because 00:44:20.369 --> 00:44:22.070 they don't really know what to do but you can 00:44:22.070 --> 00:44:25.309 tell that they know something's wrong and they 00:44:25.309 --> 00:44:27.190 want to fix it even though they don't know what 00:44:27.190 --> 00:44:33.780 to do. What about you, Mellie? littlest one actually 00:44:33.780 --> 00:44:35.679 started doing something this week that I think 00:44:35.679 --> 00:44:39.019 is so freaking funny. Like anytime we go to get 00:44:39.019 --> 00:44:42.639 him out of his bed, he starts like jumping kind 00:44:42.639 --> 00:44:44.679 of like he'll like kind of he's like pulling 00:44:44.679 --> 00:44:47.079 himself up to stand so he's kind of like propelling 00:44:47.079 --> 00:44:50.079 himself up and he does this cute little like 00:44:50.079 --> 00:44:53.400 squeal like he's so excited to see you like when 00:44:53.400 --> 00:44:55.800 he first wakes up he's like oh my gosh it's mom 00:44:55.800 --> 00:44:59.139 she came like she he's not a very fussy baby 00:44:59.139 --> 00:45:01.360 so when he starts squealing I'm just like oh 00:45:01.360 --> 00:45:04.550 you're excited to see me and he like he just 00:45:04.550 --> 00:45:06.489 started doing that this week when I was getting 00:45:06.489 --> 00:45:09.230 him up for naps so I like look forward to getting 00:45:09.230 --> 00:45:11.050 him up from naps because I know that he's just 00:45:11.050 --> 00:45:14.010 gonna be so excited trying to jump out of his 00:45:14.010 --> 00:45:17.050 crib squealing and like throwing his hands and 00:45:17.050 --> 00:45:19.530 he's just he's just so excited to see us and 00:45:19.530 --> 00:45:21.570 get ready to play with his brothers and stuff 00:45:21.570 --> 00:45:23.550 that's so sweet it probably makes you feel good 00:45:23.550 --> 00:45:26.550 too yeah oh you're so excited to see me yeah 00:45:26.550 --> 00:45:28.690 I'm doing something right if you're this excited 00:45:28.690 --> 00:45:32.380 yeah that feeling's mutual buddy Oh, that's so 00:45:32.380 --> 00:45:35.420 sweet. Well, Mellie, thanks so much for joining 00:45:35.420 --> 00:45:37.659 us on the podcast. Thank you for having me. Yeah, 00:45:37.840 --> 00:45:40.500 it's so fun to hear about just your life with 00:45:40.500 --> 00:45:43.900 four boys and all that you're navigating. And 00:45:43.900 --> 00:45:46.880 it doesn't sound easy, but it sounds like you're 00:45:46.880 --> 00:45:50.539 crushing it. Yeah. Yeah. Appreciate you. Thanks 00:45:50.539 --> 00:45:53.300 for tuning in today to Know Manual, a mom cast. 00:45:53.780 --> 00:45:56.860 Hopefully you got something out of today's episode. 00:45:57.400 --> 00:46:00.400 And if you would like, we'd love for you to rate, 00:46:00.500 --> 00:46:04.599 review, subscribe, follow us on Instagram. Let 00:46:04.599 --> 00:46:06.340 us know what you want to hear on the podcast. 00:46:06.800 --> 00:46:09.940 We'd love to hear all about what you're getting 00:46:09.940 --> 00:46:13.340 out of it. So we'll see you guys next time and 00:46:13.340 --> 00:46:15.139 hopefully have a good week. Thanks for listening. 00:46:15.199 --> 00:46:15.980 See you next week.