1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:03,400
Join us on Now We Consume.

2
00:00:03,400 --> 00:00:08,160
Take in the knowledge, take in the laughs, indulge in the topics with us.

3
00:00:08,160 --> 00:00:14,400
The Now We Consume podcast will take you through the parts of your day you normally dread.

4
00:00:14,400 --> 00:00:19,880
Why suffer through the existential crisis of life alone when you can do it with us?

5
00:00:19,880 --> 00:00:21,880
And Now We Consume.

6
00:00:21,880 --> 00:00:26,440
This is not meant to be a conspiracy episode or podcast, but we may cover some topics that

7
00:00:26,440 --> 00:00:29,280
dance that line like a toddler dances on their mother's last nerve.

8
00:00:29,280 --> 00:00:33,920
The podcast is rated I for immature audiences only.

9
00:00:33,920 --> 00:00:37,600
Hey everyone, welcome back to Now We Consume.

10
00:00:37,600 --> 00:00:43,520
Tonight we're going to be talking about a very fun topic going all the way back from

11
00:00:43,520 --> 00:00:49,080
something that started out as an ancient pagan festival, has become one of the most corporatized

12
00:00:49,080 --> 00:00:52,680
issues in American history.

13
00:00:52,680 --> 00:00:58,840
We'll be talking about the Valentine's Day Massacre, the love and dollars that are spent

14
00:00:58,840 --> 00:01:06,160
on showing that love and how people have started dating and changed the dating habits, going

15
00:01:06,160 --> 00:01:12,280
from meeting their significant others via friends, family, school and work, church through

16
00:01:12,280 --> 00:01:19,920
coworkers and now to online and dealing with the issues of dating and all the inherent

17
00:01:19,920 --> 00:01:23,800
dumpster fire that is the dating world today.

18
00:01:23,800 --> 00:01:26,480
Gibbs, say hi.

19
00:01:26,480 --> 00:01:27,480
Hello.

20
00:01:27,480 --> 00:01:30,920
It's going to be a fun one tonight, man.

21
00:01:30,920 --> 00:01:34,560
Oh yeah, just a little bit to talk about, just a little bit.

22
00:01:34,560 --> 00:01:40,520
Yeah, this, this is one that you and I have had in reserve.

23
00:01:40,520 --> 00:01:44,040
Kind of keeping it on the back burner to find the right time to talk about it.

24
00:01:44,040 --> 00:01:45,040
Oh yeah.

25
00:01:45,040 --> 00:01:51,440
We felt with Valentine's Day coming up this coming weekend, this was going to be the time

26
00:01:51,440 --> 00:01:54,080
to go ahead and drop this one.

27
00:01:54,080 --> 00:01:58,960
Absolutely, this is something that we, this is a topic that we've discussed even before

28
00:01:58,960 --> 00:02:02,960
we ever had the podcast and before we ever really did anything media wise.

29
00:02:02,960 --> 00:02:08,360
It's been an ongoing conversation we've had for years to actually probably darn near a

30
00:02:08,360 --> 00:02:10,440
decade at this point.

31
00:02:10,440 --> 00:02:12,760
So yeah, this is not new to us.

32
00:02:12,760 --> 00:02:15,720
And if anything, it's given us some time to finally really research and dive into some

33
00:02:15,720 --> 00:02:19,000
of the stuff and really have a full full length conversation.

34
00:02:19,000 --> 00:02:22,000
It's not, that's not like only five or 10 minutes.

35
00:02:22,000 --> 00:02:23,000
Yeah.

36
00:02:23,000 --> 00:02:30,880
Okay, before we get started, we felt the need to go ahead and drop a bit of a disclaimer.

37
00:02:30,880 --> 00:02:36,680
In this episode, we will be discussing the dating issues between straight couples only.

38
00:02:36,680 --> 00:02:40,560
Neither myself or Gibbs are a part of any other orientation.

39
00:02:40,560 --> 00:02:45,120
And while we recognize there are and will be obvious difficulties within other cultures

40
00:02:45,120 --> 00:02:49,320
for dating, we do not have the experience needed to discuss them.

41
00:02:49,320 --> 00:02:52,160
And we will not be making that attempt tonight.

42
00:02:52,160 --> 00:02:53,160
Exactly.

43
00:02:53,160 --> 00:03:01,480
So, to start it off, I would like to just go ahead and point out that thanks to the

44
00:03:01,480 --> 00:03:08,620
wonderful world of dating apps, I have learned through personal experience, it is a dumpster

45
00:03:08,620 --> 00:03:09,620
fire.

46
00:03:09,620 --> 00:03:13,240
And that is why Tinder has made their logo a flame.

47
00:03:13,240 --> 00:03:17,400
That app is the literal cesspooliest dumpster fire of society.

48
00:03:17,400 --> 00:03:20,280
Have you just thought about using a better app?

49
00:03:20,280 --> 00:03:26,960
Yes, I have tried a lot of them and they all suck equally, but that's probably the worst.

50
00:03:26,960 --> 00:03:28,960
You're not wrong though.

51
00:03:28,960 --> 00:03:30,120
No.

52
00:03:30,120 --> 00:03:33,680
Meeting people online is hell.

53
00:03:33,680 --> 00:03:42,760
Given my inherent work life balance, it is like most people, my best chance at meeting

54
00:03:42,760 --> 00:03:44,480
somebody.

55
00:03:44,480 --> 00:03:50,240
For those who are listening, yes, surprisingly, or unsurprisingly, depending on how well you

56
00:03:50,240 --> 00:03:56,520
know me, at the current time, I am single.

57
00:03:56,520 --> 00:03:58,840
Meeting people is hell.

58
00:03:58,840 --> 00:04:01,080
I've met some great people through the years.

59
00:04:01,080 --> 00:04:04,600
I've met some people who I thought might stab me in my sleep.

60
00:04:04,600 --> 00:04:08,120
Surprisingly, I'm still alive.

61
00:04:08,120 --> 00:04:12,280
How about you?

62
00:04:12,280 --> 00:04:16,520
You know, it's a very difficult thing to navigate.

63
00:04:16,520 --> 00:04:21,360
And as we discuss further in this, there's reasons why things are actually far more difficult

64
00:04:21,360 --> 00:04:23,200
now than they used to be in terms of dating.

65
00:04:23,200 --> 00:04:26,800
In a different way, there are obviously some other difficulties that they used to have

66
00:04:26,800 --> 00:04:29,000
that are not the case today.

67
00:04:29,000 --> 00:04:34,360
But overall, I don't know anybody that really enjoys the whole process.

68
00:04:34,360 --> 00:04:37,360
I mean, I have to be honest, I got very lucky in my situation.

69
00:04:37,360 --> 00:04:38,360
You did.

70
00:04:38,360 --> 00:04:41,120
It made a wonderful relationship and everything worked out.

71
00:04:41,120 --> 00:04:45,760
But until this one, oh yeah, yeah.

72
00:04:45,760 --> 00:04:48,760
It was not it was not enjoyable.

73
00:04:48,760 --> 00:04:50,280
I was not recommended.

74
00:04:50,280 --> 00:04:53,320
Yeah, no, you you got lucky, man.

75
00:04:53,320 --> 00:04:54,320
And oh yeah.

76
00:04:54,320 --> 00:04:59,040
And I'll say, I've I've been married twice.

77
00:04:59,040 --> 00:05:05,400
My first marriage was what six ish years and my second one was we were together for 13

78
00:05:05,400 --> 00:05:06,400
years.

79
00:05:06,400 --> 00:05:17,560
It's not like I'm incapable, but do the the the current mindset of people.

80
00:05:17,560 --> 00:05:20,160
It's so vastly different.

81
00:05:20,160 --> 00:05:27,120
Well, that's the biggest shift in the last probably 40, 50 years or really, really, not

82
00:05:27,120 --> 00:05:28,120
that old.

83
00:05:28,120 --> 00:05:29,120
15.

84
00:05:29,120 --> 00:05:35,520
I'm not saying like it's really technology that has changed a lot of this.

85
00:05:35,520 --> 00:05:40,000
You know, once the telephone was invented, once you had cars, once you could travel,

86
00:05:40,000 --> 00:05:44,080
then really once television became a thing and media and then eventually now the huge

87
00:05:44,080 --> 00:05:46,360
thing was the Internet.

88
00:05:46,360 --> 00:05:51,160
What's happened with humanity is your your potential dating pool has constantly expanded.

89
00:05:51,160 --> 00:05:53,800
It used to be the local town or village.

90
00:05:53,800 --> 00:06:00,440
Then it was once we kind of became more civilized, came your local local town, the city, maybe

91
00:06:00,440 --> 00:06:03,000
even you used to be exposed to maybe a few hundred people.

92
00:06:03,000 --> 00:06:04,320
Then it was a few thousand people.

93
00:06:04,320 --> 00:06:06,120
Then it was maybe tens of thousands of people.

94
00:06:06,120 --> 00:06:09,200
Then we had cars that was possibly hundreds of thousands of people.

95
00:06:09,200 --> 00:06:14,400
And now really ever since that 2005 2010 range when Internet dating started to become a thing.

96
00:06:14,400 --> 00:06:15,800
Now it's you.

97
00:06:15,800 --> 00:06:16,800
There's no limit.

98
00:06:16,800 --> 00:06:20,660
You can be exposed to every single person on the planet.

99
00:06:20,660 --> 00:06:26,040
And what's terrifying is that dating pool means that in a good way, odds are you can

100
00:06:26,040 --> 00:06:27,440
find somebody.

101
00:06:27,440 --> 00:06:33,560
The bad news is everybody thinks that they deserve their their prince or princess in

102
00:06:33,560 --> 00:06:37,760
terms of having everything they could ever possibly.

103
00:06:37,760 --> 00:06:41,040
They think that they loaded up to like a shopping cart.

104
00:06:41,040 --> 00:06:44,780
You know, it's like, oh, yeah, I want this, this, this, this, this, this and this click.

105
00:06:44,780 --> 00:06:45,940
And they think that's how it works.

106
00:06:45,940 --> 00:06:49,080
It's a very distorted reality.

107
00:06:49,080 --> 00:06:52,840
Whereas it used to be you meet someone through someone, you know, or through your local area

108
00:06:52,840 --> 00:06:53,840
workplace.

109
00:06:53,840 --> 00:06:55,560
And if you hit it off, you did or you didn't.

110
00:06:55,560 --> 00:06:56,560
You didn't.

111
00:06:56,560 --> 00:07:02,480
You know, granted, I didn't really, you know, partake in that as much before.

112
00:07:02,480 --> 00:07:03,800
But you get what I'm saying.

113
00:07:03,800 --> 00:07:04,800
Oh, yeah.

114
00:07:04,800 --> 00:07:05,800
Yeah.

115
00:07:05,800 --> 00:07:06,800
It was far more by happenstance.

116
00:07:06,800 --> 00:07:07,960
It really was people that were local to you.

117
00:07:07,960 --> 00:07:13,720
Therefore, odds are they shared the culture and the ideas and ideals and values.

118
00:07:13,720 --> 00:07:18,980
Whereas now a lot of people, I think, you know, date sometimes even far beyond their

119
00:07:18,980 --> 00:07:23,640
local area or culture, which even presents its own problems or issues.

120
00:07:23,640 --> 00:07:25,680
Oh, yeah.

121
00:07:25,680 --> 00:07:26,680
Yeah.

122
00:07:26,680 --> 00:07:32,400
And when you when you brought up the exposure to the entire planet, I was going to say,

123
00:07:32,400 --> 00:07:34,480
what are they called now?

124
00:07:34,480 --> 00:07:37,120
Visa bros or green card passports?

125
00:07:37,120 --> 00:07:39,120
That's what it is.

126
00:07:39,120 --> 00:07:40,120
Yeah.

127
00:07:40,120 --> 00:07:46,760
The fact that people are so sick of the dating pool in their area, they're literally going

128
00:07:46,760 --> 00:07:52,120
out of the country to find somebody that more lines up with what they're looking for, kind

129
00:07:52,120 --> 00:08:00,320
of says something about I don't know if it's their local dating pool or the American ideals

130
00:08:00,320 --> 00:08:02,600
of dating in general.

131
00:08:02,600 --> 00:08:07,600
Oh, I think I'm sorry, you know, I was let's be real.

132
00:08:07,600 --> 00:08:15,240
It seems like God don't put me on a stake for this.

133
00:08:15,240 --> 00:08:24,540
It seems like the vast, vast majority of women, I'm putting air quotes, seem to have horribly

134
00:08:24,540 --> 00:08:32,040
unrealistic expectations for what they feel like they either should be getting or looking

135
00:08:32,040 --> 00:08:34,900
for in the men they're dating.

136
00:08:34,900 --> 00:08:35,900
You know what?

137
00:08:35,900 --> 00:08:38,920
Let me put a caveat that I would say most people, regardless either way.

138
00:08:38,920 --> 00:08:40,280
Yes, I also know.

139
00:08:40,280 --> 00:08:41,280
I will.

140
00:08:41,280 --> 00:08:43,480
I know a lot of guys that are fucking delusional.

141
00:08:43,480 --> 00:08:44,480
We know.

142
00:08:44,480 --> 00:08:46,680
I know a lot of women that are fucking delusional.

143
00:08:46,680 --> 00:08:48,800
We know one guy in particular.

144
00:08:48,800 --> 00:08:49,800
Yes.

145
00:08:49,800 --> 00:08:55,440
But but I actually I would say even outside of that, I know quite a few that Jesus Christ,

146
00:08:55,440 --> 00:08:56,440
what are they thinking?

147
00:08:56,440 --> 00:09:02,200
Yeah, it's it's the problem of when you have a society that everybody's so self centered,

148
00:09:02,200 --> 00:09:05,840
they feel like that they are a 10 when they have nothing to offer.

149
00:09:05,840 --> 00:09:06,840
Yeah.

150
00:09:06,840 --> 00:09:07,840
And they feel like they deserve the best.

151
00:09:07,840 --> 00:09:13,280
And unfortunately, the reality is like everybody has to compromise.

152
00:09:13,280 --> 00:09:15,320
Everybody has some things going on.

153
00:09:15,320 --> 00:09:22,720
And the reality is, I guess a lot of people assume they want to have this quote unquote

154
00:09:22,720 --> 00:09:27,400
Facebook or Instagram or social media perfect quote unquote relationship.

155
00:09:27,400 --> 00:09:29,680
But they're not looking for the values beyond that.

156
00:09:29,680 --> 00:09:30,680
Oh, yeah.

157
00:09:30,680 --> 00:09:37,080
Social media has done more to ruin dating and in fact, people's lives than I think anything

158
00:09:37,080 --> 00:09:41,760
else that's come out of society in the last hundred years.

159
00:09:41,760 --> 00:09:42,760
Oh, yeah.

160
00:09:42,760 --> 00:09:43,760
100 percent.

161
00:09:43,760 --> 00:09:45,920
100 percent. I think that's the problem.

162
00:09:45,920 --> 00:09:51,240
It's the shallow nature that people are looking for now rather than establishing somebody

163
00:09:51,240 --> 00:09:53,920
that you know, you can love and appreciate.

164
00:09:53,920 --> 00:09:58,300
I guess I guess one of the greatest bits of advice I ever given to me when I was younger

165
00:09:58,300 --> 00:10:04,040
was try to find a date, somebody that you admire, not just that you're attracted to,

166
00:10:04,040 --> 00:10:08,440
not just that you love or whatever be around, but somebody you can actually look to in an

167
00:10:08,440 --> 00:10:13,080
up to for some things for certain different aspects.

168
00:10:13,080 --> 00:10:14,080
And on that, I go.

169
00:10:14,080 --> 00:10:15,080
Sorry.

170
00:10:15,080 --> 00:10:16,080
Go ahead.

171
00:10:16,080 --> 00:10:17,080
Finish.

172
00:10:17,080 --> 00:10:18,080
No, I don't just say that.

173
00:10:18,080 --> 00:10:19,080
That is that is something that I see a lot of people.

174
00:10:19,080 --> 00:10:21,080
And again, I'm no dating expert.

175
00:10:21,080 --> 00:10:27,960
I'm not trying to say that to build off what you said, not just somebody that you admire,

176
00:10:27,960 --> 00:10:32,560
somebody that you would be proud to have your kids dating as well.

177
00:10:32,560 --> 00:10:38,600
If the person you're with, if you can smile at them and say, I hope my kids end up with

178
00:10:38,600 --> 00:10:40,400
somebody like this someday.

179
00:10:40,400 --> 00:10:41,520
Yeah.

180
00:10:41,520 --> 00:10:43,440
That tells you you're with somebody good.

181
00:10:43,440 --> 00:10:48,120
Yeah, because the thing is, your children are going to have part of their values and

182
00:10:48,120 --> 00:10:50,040
their reflection as well.

183
00:10:50,040 --> 00:10:55,280
So you know, would you be proud of that person if parts of them were in your children?

184
00:10:55,280 --> 00:10:58,640
And for a lot of people, they don't think that through.

185
00:10:58,640 --> 00:11:02,880
But to be fair, I think a lot of people don't think the relationship passed more than five

186
00:11:02,880 --> 00:11:04,920
minutes from now, 10 minutes from now.

187
00:11:04,920 --> 00:11:05,920
Yeah.

188
00:11:05,920 --> 00:11:07,760
It's like, am I getting fed or am I getting fucked?

189
00:11:07,760 --> 00:11:08,760
OK, that's cool.

190
00:11:08,760 --> 00:11:12,000
Like a lot of people don't look past the next Instagram post.

191
00:11:12,000 --> 00:11:14,200
So I know.

192
00:11:14,200 --> 00:11:18,560
Oh, there's some people I know that do the weird thing, which I don't get it where they

193
00:11:18,560 --> 00:11:20,720
date a new person every like 30 minutes.

194
00:11:20,720 --> 00:11:24,120
It's like, oh, but this person, they post all the bunch of pictures and everything.

195
00:11:24,120 --> 00:11:26,120
They're like, oh, three months later, I'm not feeling it.

196
00:11:26,120 --> 00:11:27,120
They just walk away.

197
00:11:27,120 --> 00:11:29,040
I'll never understand that.

198
00:11:29,040 --> 00:11:32,360
That I will never get.

199
00:11:32,360 --> 00:11:33,600
No.

200
00:11:33,600 --> 00:11:43,680
I think as far as the dating world is concerned, men, by and large, have the biggest uphill

201
00:11:43,680 --> 00:11:48,320
battle and OK, yes, call me biased.

202
00:11:48,320 --> 00:11:55,320
But I feel that women, especially women who are viewed as pretty and beautiful, are on

203
00:11:55,320 --> 00:11:58,340
easy mode in life.

204
00:11:58,340 --> 00:12:02,040
They can literally get to pick whoever they want to talk to or go home with if that's

205
00:12:02,040 --> 00:12:05,420
what they're doing for the night.

206
00:12:05,420 --> 00:12:12,960
They can sell pictures and videos of themselves doing literally anything from next to nothing

207
00:12:12,960 --> 00:12:16,000
to full on porn.

208
00:12:16,000 --> 00:12:20,840
And they get the run of the sights.

209
00:12:20,840 --> 00:12:26,360
But we'll say they can sell the clothes right off their body.

210
00:12:26,360 --> 00:12:30,040
To the biggest and loneliest of the sims out there.

211
00:12:30,040 --> 00:12:36,320
They can sell feet pics, bath water, fuck, even jars of farts.

212
00:12:36,320 --> 00:12:41,480
There is not one man on earth that can do those things.

213
00:12:41,480 --> 00:12:43,440
I'm not going to disagree with you on that.

214
00:12:43,440 --> 00:12:45,400
You're absolutely right.

215
00:12:45,400 --> 00:12:50,480
I guess it's one of those things where people don't understand is kind of there's this dating

216
00:12:50,480 --> 00:12:51,480
thing.

217
00:12:51,480 --> 00:12:56,600
I actually watched a bit of a documentary on this about a year ago about dating preferences

218
00:12:56,600 --> 00:12:58,760
and dating value and stuff like that.

219
00:12:58,760 --> 00:13:03,920
There's this weird thing where men hit kind of their peak to plateau.

220
00:13:03,920 --> 00:13:08,120
They peak up right around like 23, 25 and they stay there almost for most women until

221
00:13:08,120 --> 00:13:10,320
they're about 50 or 55 and they drop off.

222
00:13:10,320 --> 00:13:12,480
Okay, you had me worried there for a second.

223
00:13:12,480 --> 00:13:13,480
Women have this.

224
00:13:13,480 --> 00:13:16,980
Typically in the dating world for a lot of women, they don't really care how much older

225
00:13:16,980 --> 00:13:20,040
a guy is because that's just that's just how women are.

226
00:13:20,040 --> 00:13:21,040
Let's be real.

227
00:13:21,040 --> 00:13:25,080
And unfortunately, the data provides that if someone's telling me, well, that's not

228
00:13:25,080 --> 00:13:26,080
my preference.

229
00:13:26,080 --> 00:13:27,080
Cool.

230
00:13:27,080 --> 00:13:28,080
That's you.

231
00:13:28,080 --> 00:13:32,520
So, you know, for most men, it's it right around that 25, 24, 25 and then they're basically

232
00:13:32,520 --> 00:13:35,560
plateau until they're about 55, 50.

233
00:13:35,560 --> 00:13:41,400
Whereas with women, it's this sharp peak between 21 to 28 and then it drops down a bit till

234
00:13:41,400 --> 00:13:46,480
about 34, 33, even 35 and then it just falls hard.

235
00:13:46,480 --> 00:13:50,240
And unfortunately, how how does that reflect?

236
00:13:50,240 --> 00:13:54,000
Well, that reflects in a lot of younger women being able to get attention very quickly,

237
00:13:54,000 --> 00:14:01,080
getting money very quickly and also with men's, I guess, peak attraction for being so long.

238
00:14:01,080 --> 00:14:03,080
Look at the men like, oh, God, what's that actor?

239
00:14:03,080 --> 00:14:05,240
Those trades in the 24 year old chicks.

240
00:14:05,240 --> 00:14:06,240
Leo.

241
00:14:06,240 --> 00:14:07,240
Yes.

242
00:14:07,240 --> 00:14:08,560
They are DiCaprio.

243
00:14:08,560 --> 00:14:09,880
Look at someone like him.

244
00:14:09,880 --> 00:14:11,600
Someone who's got he's probably 50 now.

245
00:14:11,600 --> 00:14:12,600
Fifty five, 50.

246
00:14:12,600 --> 00:14:13,600
Yeah, he's in his 50s.

247
00:14:13,600 --> 00:14:14,600
That's for sure.

248
00:14:14,600 --> 00:14:15,600
Yeah.

249
00:14:15,600 --> 00:14:18,120
But he trades him in like they're going out of style for whatever reason.

250
00:14:18,120 --> 00:14:20,560
And there's always another woman lined up.

251
00:14:20,560 --> 00:14:23,360
There's always someone else that that's ready to take his money.

252
00:14:23,360 --> 00:14:25,760
That's that's exactly what they're there for.

253
00:14:25,760 --> 00:14:29,240
And that's one of the things I think a lot of people don't understand.

254
00:14:29,240 --> 00:14:32,120
They look at a skewed reality where there are many people out there that are willing

255
00:14:32,120 --> 00:14:38,000
to date just for the culture and the experience that surrounds that person.

256
00:14:38,000 --> 00:14:44,560
And that's one of the things where, unfortunately, a lot of women do date guys up for the the

257
00:14:44,560 --> 00:14:49,480
culture and kind of the what they can provide around them, whereas a lot of men will date

258
00:14:49,480 --> 00:14:56,360
younger, pretty women for also what is provided there to not just, by the way, any sort of

259
00:14:56,360 --> 00:15:00,760
intimacy, but also it's for the social status among other people.

260
00:15:00,760 --> 00:15:05,400
It sometimes even as a justification of themselves or kind of reinforces their own self worth.

261
00:15:05,400 --> 00:15:09,960
You know, I've met guys that just try to date the prettiest woman just because they can.

262
00:15:09,960 --> 00:15:11,520
It's kind of a show of force.

263
00:15:11,520 --> 00:15:12,880
It's a show of, oh, you know, hey, look at me.

264
00:15:12,880 --> 00:15:13,880
I'm so quick at the person.

265
00:15:13,880 --> 00:15:16,560
It's like, yeah, but she could be a total bitch.

266
00:15:16,560 --> 00:15:20,840
But not a lot of don't care because they've got that arm trophy.

267
00:15:20,840 --> 00:15:21,960
And that's their goal.

268
00:15:21,960 --> 00:15:26,880
It's this weird parasitic relationship where you have women that say there's some women

269
00:15:26,880 --> 00:15:28,160
that say, oh, my God, all these guys suck.

270
00:15:28,160 --> 00:15:30,880
But yet they're going after guys simply because they have the money.

271
00:15:30,880 --> 00:15:31,880
Be it and vice versa.

272
00:15:31,880 --> 00:15:36,000
Those guys that say, you know, all women are blah, blah, blah, blah, or whatever.

273
00:15:36,000 --> 00:15:38,200
And but they're only going after them as a trophy wife.

274
00:15:38,200 --> 00:15:42,040
And the weird thing is they wrote it for everybody else surrounding them.

275
00:15:42,040 --> 00:15:47,920
They create this weird parasitic relationship that just defeats the entire purpose and unfortunately

276
00:15:47,920 --> 00:15:49,920
destroys everyone else around them.

277
00:15:49,920 --> 00:15:50,920
Why?

278
00:15:50,920 --> 00:15:54,280
Because, oh, inevitably they always bring in their friends or they say, oh, this person's

279
00:15:54,280 --> 00:15:55,280
crap.

280
00:15:55,280 --> 00:15:56,280
This person's crap.

281
00:15:56,280 --> 00:15:57,280
I've seen it happen.

282
00:15:57,280 --> 00:16:01,620
And it's oh, yeah, it's absolutely disgusting.

283
00:16:01,620 --> 00:16:09,280
But what gets me is both of these types of people, they continue doing it.

284
00:16:09,280 --> 00:16:12,440
If you don't want these kind of people, if you don't want these kind of crappy people

285
00:16:12,440 --> 00:16:16,000
are taking advantage of women, taking advantage of men, taking advantage of their money or

286
00:16:16,000 --> 00:16:17,480
taking advantage of their youth.

287
00:16:17,480 --> 00:16:19,160
Stop dating them.

288
00:16:19,160 --> 00:16:22,680
Stop supporting your friends, dating them.

289
00:16:22,680 --> 00:16:23,800
I would be honest.

290
00:16:23,800 --> 00:16:28,200
I have gotten rid of male friends of mine because they were weird with women.

291
00:16:28,200 --> 00:16:29,760
I've told them absolutely the fuck not.

292
00:16:29,760 --> 00:16:31,760
And I've walked away from them.

293
00:16:31,760 --> 00:16:34,040
And I had absolutely zero remorse.

294
00:16:34,040 --> 00:16:35,360
And same thing vice versa.

295
00:16:35,360 --> 00:16:37,240
I had had female friends of mine that were trying to decass.

296
00:16:37,240 --> 00:16:40,120
It was like, well, I don't really like him, but I mean, he has money.

297
00:16:40,120 --> 00:16:44,600
It's like, yeah, but then you're using him and he's using you like as long as you're

298
00:16:44,600 --> 00:16:45,600
honest with it.

299
00:16:45,600 --> 00:16:49,200
If someone told me, you know, I don't really know what I want, but at least they have money.

300
00:16:49,200 --> 00:16:51,080
So whatever it's like, OK, at least you're being honest.

301
00:16:51,080 --> 00:16:55,200
But lying about something like that to say, oh, well, I love them so much.

302
00:16:55,200 --> 00:16:58,200
But they but they say, oh, yeah, they have all this money.

303
00:16:58,200 --> 00:16:59,200
All this.

304
00:16:59,200 --> 00:17:02,020
It's like, well, that's the justification.

305
00:17:02,020 --> 00:17:05,220
That's your reason to say, oh, you want to be with that person because they give you

306
00:17:05,220 --> 00:17:10,600
that experience, culture, exposure, travel, whatever you want, which again, if that's

307
00:17:10,600 --> 00:17:12,360
what you're into, fine.

308
00:17:12,360 --> 00:17:17,600
But don't go blaming people or blaming other people or lumping everybody into that faction

309
00:17:17,600 --> 00:17:19,800
saying, oh, all men or all women.

310
00:17:19,800 --> 00:17:21,640
No, because then you sound like an idiot.

311
00:17:21,640 --> 00:17:25,920
You sound like somebody that is not well cultured, that somebody that has not taken anything

312
00:17:25,920 --> 00:17:30,360
like that into consideration and really haven't seen exactly the different kind of relationships

313
00:17:30,360 --> 00:17:31,360
that are out there.

314
00:17:31,360 --> 00:17:35,120
Therefore, there are some relationships that sometimes are very financially driven for

315
00:17:35,120 --> 00:17:36,120
both sides.

316
00:17:36,120 --> 00:17:37,480
Oh, yeah.

317
00:17:37,480 --> 00:17:41,120
And that's perfectly fine, too, as long as both sides come out, come to an understanding.

318
00:17:41,120 --> 00:17:42,120
Yeah.

319
00:17:42,120 --> 00:17:44,760
If they agree to that up front, then yes, that's totally fine.

320
00:17:44,760 --> 00:17:46,240
Yeah, absolutely.

321
00:17:46,240 --> 00:17:47,600
That's not a problem at all.

322
00:17:47,600 --> 00:17:48,600
Or vice versa.

323
00:17:48,600 --> 00:17:51,160
There are many relationships that start with neither one of them have anything and they

324
00:17:51,160 --> 00:17:54,560
build something together and that's wonderful and that's awesome.

325
00:17:54,560 --> 00:18:04,320
But there is this problem of this inequity issue where there's a lot of men that statistically

326
00:18:04,320 --> 00:18:09,880
have to earn more than the women they're dating or else they're invisible, essentially.

327
00:18:09,880 --> 00:18:14,400
So with women earning more and more every year and actually for the first time the last

328
00:18:14,400 --> 00:18:18,640
couple of years, women on average between I think it was like twenty one to thirty earn

329
00:18:18,640 --> 00:18:20,060
more than men.

330
00:18:20,060 --> 00:18:25,840
So a lot of them are dating older guys or they're trying to date way higher up in the

331
00:18:25,840 --> 00:18:28,920
higher social hierarchy and trying to date guys that make a lot more money.

332
00:18:28,920 --> 00:18:31,580
You're talking, you know, a girl from out in the middle of nowhere trying to date a

333
00:18:31,580 --> 00:18:35,160
guy that's in Hollywood making three or four hundred thousand dollars a year.

334
00:18:35,160 --> 00:18:36,720
And then here comes the question.

335
00:18:36,720 --> 00:18:42,440
Well, if that's your social expectation, if you think, wow, I am, you know, just your

336
00:18:42,440 --> 00:18:47,040
average person from out in the middle of nowhere, you know, maybe you have some sort of degree,

337
00:18:47,040 --> 00:18:48,460
but it's an associate's or whatever.

338
00:18:48,460 --> 00:18:49,460
Maybe don't have a lot going on.

339
00:18:49,460 --> 00:18:51,480
You know, 40,000 a year.

340
00:18:51,480 --> 00:18:55,480
And you think just by being somewhat attractive, you're going to pull somebody make a three

341
00:18:55,480 --> 00:18:59,240
hundred thousand dollars a year from L.A. What are you nuts?

342
00:18:59,240 --> 00:19:03,120
And then you get mad when that person uses you for some fun for three or six months.

343
00:19:03,120 --> 00:19:09,120
It's like, well, yeah, sure, what they did was shitty, but you're also not being realistic

344
00:19:09,120 --> 00:19:10,160
either.

345
00:19:10,160 --> 00:19:11,160
So then what happens?

346
00:19:11,160 --> 00:19:15,320
I've seen this happen where there's someone to get used by three, four or five guys and

347
00:19:15,320 --> 00:19:17,200
like, oh, well, all guys suck.

348
00:19:17,200 --> 00:19:20,280
And then they end up with some guy that's abusive or something or something that goes

349
00:19:20,280 --> 00:19:21,280
happen.

350
00:19:21,280 --> 00:19:22,280
I don't even know.

351
00:19:22,280 --> 00:19:23,280
I've seen it go many ways.

352
00:19:23,280 --> 00:19:24,640
And the problem is great.

353
00:19:24,640 --> 00:19:28,680
So now you're using trauma to justify more trauma, to create that vicious cycle.

354
00:19:28,680 --> 00:19:31,640
And then unfortunately, if they ever have kids, then the kids are back on that trauma

355
00:19:31,640 --> 00:19:32,960
merry go round again.

356
00:19:32,960 --> 00:19:33,960
Yep.

357
00:19:33,960 --> 00:19:38,440
So sorry about the little rant there, but like I've just I've seen it happen so many

358
00:19:38,440 --> 00:19:39,440
times.

359
00:19:39,440 --> 00:19:44,400
And I think that's why for me, I was very, very particular about what I wanted in a relationship.

360
00:19:44,400 --> 00:19:48,120
I was very deliberate and very honest upfront.

361
00:19:48,120 --> 00:19:51,960
And that's why it worked out for me, because I knew my standards.

362
00:19:51,960 --> 00:19:55,600
I knew what I expected of both myself and my partner.

363
00:19:55,600 --> 00:19:57,480
And it's worked out wonderfully.

364
00:19:57,480 --> 00:19:59,460
But I know that's not the same for everybody.

365
00:19:59,460 --> 00:20:05,720
But I think for an individual, you have to know what you expect, what you want.

366
00:20:05,720 --> 00:20:09,520
And you have to hold yourself accountable to because it's so easy for people to kind

367
00:20:09,520 --> 00:20:14,080
of let things go and not take care of your side, not do the stuff you have to do.

368
00:20:14,080 --> 00:20:17,560
And we all have our our like our stuff happen, stuff that happens in life.

369
00:20:17,560 --> 00:20:18,800
You know, I get that.

370
00:20:18,800 --> 00:20:20,840
But hold yourself to it.

371
00:20:20,840 --> 00:20:24,320
Do the best you can and also talk about stuff, not for nothing, but nothing.

372
00:20:24,320 --> 00:20:25,320
Anything can be fixed in a relationship.

373
00:20:25,320 --> 00:20:29,080
As long as you don't cheat, you're probably pretty, pretty OK.

374
00:20:29,080 --> 00:20:30,080
Right.

375
00:20:30,080 --> 00:20:32,240
And, you know, you mentioned cheating.

376
00:20:32,240 --> 00:20:37,960
That kind of brings up one of the biggest issues with a lot of the relationships that

377
00:20:37,960 --> 00:20:43,600
go on and go down today is it's just too easy for people to cheat, especially if they've

378
00:20:43,600 --> 00:20:46,720
got that in them.

379
00:20:46,720 --> 00:20:51,040
You know, the the access and the availability of the potential for new relationships is

380
00:20:51,040 --> 00:20:59,000
so prevalent and people can, you know, hide stuff easy and they can talk to people and

381
00:20:59,000 --> 00:21:02,880
meet people and make fake profiles and all this other bullshit.

382
00:21:02,880 --> 00:21:06,640
It's so easy if you're inclined for it.

383
00:21:06,640 --> 00:21:09,840
And it's it ruins people.

384
00:21:09,840 --> 00:21:15,160
It ruins relationships and then it sours people that are affected by it.

385
00:21:15,160 --> 00:21:20,560
So and I guess what the ease today that it would be to have can't lead to double life

386
00:21:20,560 --> 00:21:24,880
or kind of to only show the side that you want to show.

387
00:21:24,880 --> 00:21:31,320
It's very easy to have a facade, basically, or have a fake image that you can get someone

388
00:21:31,320 --> 00:21:34,080
to follow you, a fall over for you.

389
00:21:34,080 --> 00:21:37,120
And then they come to find out that's not the real you.

390
00:21:37,120 --> 00:21:41,280
And also cheating like it's crazy.

391
00:21:41,280 --> 00:21:47,400
The stories I've heard from people about dating someone for a year or two or whatever.

392
00:21:47,400 --> 00:21:50,840
And then they find out, oh, yeah, they just installed a dating app or something like that.

393
00:21:50,840 --> 00:21:53,760
And I guess they're cheating on me for a while and they found this other person they they

394
00:21:53,760 --> 00:21:57,080
leave and all of a sudden they think, oh, the grass is greener without even discussing

395
00:21:57,080 --> 00:21:58,080
anything.

396
00:21:58,080 --> 00:22:01,440
And then they realize, oh, this person was lying the whole time.

397
00:22:01,440 --> 00:22:04,560
Like, well, yeah, not for nothing.

398
00:22:04,560 --> 00:22:08,240
If anybody's willing to actively date somebody when they're already dating somebody else

399
00:22:08,240 --> 00:22:11,520
and okay with them cheating, they're probably not a good person.

400
00:22:11,520 --> 00:22:12,520
No.

401
00:22:12,520 --> 00:22:16,960
And you know, that just kind of Zoid broke into my head here for a second.

402
00:22:16,960 --> 00:22:25,960
The prevalence of open relationships, poly and an EMM ethical non monogamy.

403
00:22:25,960 --> 00:22:30,400
What the actual fuck is all of that shit?

404
00:22:30,400 --> 00:22:34,760
I mean, people are OK with getting spit roasted with their next door neighbor now.

405
00:22:34,760 --> 00:22:35,760
What the fuck?

406
00:22:35,760 --> 00:22:41,240
Some some there's actually I follow somebody on Tiktok because I just find it very interesting,

407
00:22:41,240 --> 00:22:42,240
not something I partake in.

408
00:22:42,240 --> 00:22:47,360
But there are people that like join specific communities like living communities that they're

409
00:22:47,360 --> 00:22:49,000
like a swinger community.

410
00:22:49,000 --> 00:22:50,000
That's what they do.

411
00:22:50,000 --> 00:22:52,000
Oh, my God.

412
00:22:52,000 --> 00:22:53,000
I know.

413
00:22:53,000 --> 00:22:54,000
I know.

414
00:22:54,000 --> 00:22:56,000
If that's your thing, like whatever.

415
00:22:56,000 --> 00:22:57,000
But what's I mean?

416
00:22:57,000 --> 00:22:58,000
Sure.

417
00:22:58,000 --> 00:23:00,920
I'm going to go to the barbecue and hey, there's Pam.

418
00:23:00,920 --> 00:23:03,800
Let's grab Greg.

419
00:23:03,800 --> 00:23:05,560
But whatever.

420
00:23:05,560 --> 00:23:12,000
I will say, at least in my experience, again, being in my early 30s, I do know many couples,

421
00:23:12,000 --> 00:23:21,640
not just a handful, but many that are open in some way, which I do find odd because again,

422
00:23:21,640 --> 00:23:25,200
I wasn't around 50 years ago, but or even 30.

423
00:23:25,200 --> 00:23:28,560
Well, I was technically, but doesn't really matter.

424
00:23:28,560 --> 00:23:32,100
But I wasn't around long enough to go to know really the difference.

425
00:23:32,100 --> 00:23:35,840
But I've noticed in the last 10 years, at least of my adulthood, that like it seems

426
00:23:35,840 --> 00:23:40,120
like either people just don't care anymore, which like, cool, whatever you do your thing.

427
00:23:40,120 --> 00:23:44,080
But a lot of people I know that are very open with it and sometimes a very kind of disgusting

428
00:23:44,080 --> 00:23:45,080
way.

429
00:23:45,080 --> 00:23:46,080
Uh huh.

430
00:23:46,080 --> 00:23:51,320
Like, you know, I'm not against PDA, but like, let's let's have some boundaries here, buddy.

431
00:23:51,320 --> 00:23:52,320
Yeah.

432
00:23:52,320 --> 00:23:56,880
It's like, hey, I usually have to go on the internet for what I'm seeing here.

433
00:23:56,880 --> 00:23:57,880
Yeah.

434
00:23:57,880 --> 00:24:01,320
Well, it's just uncomfortable.

435
00:24:01,320 --> 00:24:04,200
What's in public spaces to like, it's one thing I don't care if you're like a secluded

436
00:24:04,200 --> 00:24:06,520
part like a movie theater or something that you do.

437
00:24:06,520 --> 00:24:07,520
I really don't care.

438
00:24:07,520 --> 00:24:09,480
I'm pretty easy going.

439
00:24:09,480 --> 00:24:11,720
But now hold on.

440
00:24:11,720 --> 00:24:18,060
When you're in a movie theater and and you're watching your show, you you you don't need

441
00:24:18,060 --> 00:24:22,720
to be hearing, you know, this in the seat behind you.

442
00:24:22,720 --> 00:24:24,640
That's that's just too much.

443
00:24:24,640 --> 00:24:25,640
Yeah.

444
00:24:25,640 --> 00:24:26,640
Yeah.

445
00:24:26,640 --> 00:24:31,000
The problem is, you know, we've always heard some Gluck Gluck 9000 go on and like someone

446
00:24:31,000 --> 00:24:35,840
is she that lady was proud that there was no shame in that.

447
00:24:35,840 --> 00:24:39,640
That's what you just turn around and give the guy a high five.

448
00:24:39,640 --> 00:24:44,880
But but again, like like people have their fun and that's cool.

449
00:24:44,880 --> 00:24:49,400
And you know, as long as it's consensual, whatever you do, you.

450
00:24:49,400 --> 00:24:54,200
But there does get a lot of weirdness when it comes to at least I've noticed there's

451
00:24:54,200 --> 00:25:01,160
a there's a lot of people, I guess, that have this fear of commitment, I guess.

452
00:25:01,160 --> 00:25:05,400
The fear of seeing a relationship, you know, from beginning to end are like trying to work

453
00:25:05,400 --> 00:25:08,080
on stuff, trying to work things out.

454
00:25:08,080 --> 00:25:10,680
The minute it gets difficult, there's a lot of people who are just like, they're done.

455
00:25:10,680 --> 00:25:11,680
Well, like, yeah, exactly.

456
00:25:11,680 --> 00:25:12,680
They just walk away.

457
00:25:12,680 --> 00:25:14,380
They're like, oh, I guess I'm done with it.

458
00:25:14,380 --> 00:25:17,280
It's like, well, why are you there?

459
00:25:17,280 --> 00:25:18,280
Yeah.

460
00:25:18,280 --> 00:25:22,760
Throwaway mentality, replacement mentality is so prevalent.

461
00:25:22,760 --> 00:25:24,200
No one's willing to fix things.

462
00:25:24,200 --> 00:25:26,420
No one's willing to work on it.

463
00:25:26,420 --> 00:25:30,440
You know, we we've talked about that with like right to repair and we're going to do

464
00:25:30,440 --> 00:25:33,360
an episode on that eventually.

465
00:25:33,360 --> 00:25:37,200
You have to be able to fix things in order to keep them around.

466
00:25:37,200 --> 00:25:43,320
That's not only true for the physical things in your life, but the emotional stuff, too.

467
00:25:43,320 --> 00:25:50,480
And I would argue if you do your due diligence and find someone that's worth dating, they

468
00:25:50,480 --> 00:25:56,920
are worth working through on things and discussing things and having those hard, you know, difficult,

469
00:25:56,920 --> 00:25:57,920
difficult discussions.

470
00:25:57,920 --> 00:25:58,920
Oh, 100 percent.

471
00:25:58,920 --> 00:26:03,160
And there's a lot of stuff in a relationship that like things get uncomfortable.

472
00:26:03,160 --> 00:26:04,440
Sure.

473
00:26:04,440 --> 00:26:06,040
But I guess I would argue.

474
00:26:06,040 --> 00:26:10,920
Especially when you slip.

475
00:26:10,920 --> 00:26:13,240
Catch that back end at the wrong time.

476
00:26:13,240 --> 00:26:14,720
I felt so bad.

477
00:26:14,720 --> 00:26:19,240
I accidentally you ever those things are like like like you're trying to move around a bed,

478
00:26:19,240 --> 00:26:21,640
but you're not aware of where you are near the edge, where you are.

479
00:26:21,640 --> 00:26:28,240
I totally accidentally like mid forearm was trying to move a bobtail in the nose last

480
00:26:28,240 --> 00:26:29,240
night.

481
00:26:29,240 --> 00:26:30,240
I felt so bad.

482
00:26:30,240 --> 00:26:32,080
I didn't realize she was like right there next to my face.

483
00:26:32,080 --> 00:26:34,400
So I try to come from like, I want to flip over.

484
00:26:34,400 --> 00:26:35,720
I just look back.

485
00:26:35,720 --> 00:26:39,640
Or what's worse, you're trying to turn over or something and you don't realize their hair

486
00:26:39,640 --> 00:26:45,480
is where it is and you end up yanking the hair off their scalp, waking them up out of

487
00:26:45,480 --> 00:26:46,480
a dead sleep.

488
00:26:46,480 --> 00:26:47,480
God, I feel so bad.

489
00:26:47,480 --> 00:26:48,480
Oh, yeah.

490
00:26:48,480 --> 00:26:49,480
Oh, yeah.

491
00:26:49,480 --> 00:26:55,080
That's as I have learned, bed logistics is a real thing.

492
00:26:55,080 --> 00:26:56,800
What is it?

493
00:26:56,800 --> 00:26:58,400
Got to be a bed logistics.

494
00:26:58,400 --> 00:26:59,400
Oh, yeah.

495
00:26:59,400 --> 00:27:00,400
Yeah.

496
00:27:00,400 --> 00:27:02,600
That's that's what honestly, we're probably going to king mattress because like as much

497
00:27:02,600 --> 00:27:06,880
as the queen is nice, like after we at the hotel, then I'm like, wow, we really need

498
00:27:06,880 --> 00:27:09,520
a king because my our problem is we both like to sleep diagonal.

499
00:27:09,520 --> 00:27:11,120
On the bed.

500
00:27:11,120 --> 00:27:15,440
So it becomes the weird problem of I slowly get inched off at some point and then I just

501
00:27:15,440 --> 00:27:17,320
end up on the floor and I admit defeat.

502
00:27:17,320 --> 00:27:20,000
But then if I let it go far enough, I can get back on.

503
00:27:20,000 --> 00:27:23,440
So it's this kind of weird game of chicken of like, you know, how far I let her snuggle

504
00:27:23,440 --> 00:27:24,440
up against the heat.

505
00:27:24,440 --> 00:27:25,520
That's like, OK, you're out of my way.

506
00:27:25,520 --> 00:27:27,520
But anyways, besides the point.

507
00:27:27,520 --> 00:27:28,520
Yeah.

508
00:27:28,520 --> 00:27:35,160
Can I just say women are amazing and wonderful creatures just because of the shit they put

509
00:27:35,160 --> 00:27:36,160
up with from us.

510
00:27:36,160 --> 00:27:37,160
Oh, yeah.

511
00:27:37,160 --> 00:27:40,360
I think I think it goes both ways.

512
00:27:40,360 --> 00:27:41,880
I definitely think that goes both ways.

513
00:27:41,880 --> 00:27:43,200
So so to a lot of people.

514
00:27:43,200 --> 00:27:46,200
But you know, that's.

515
00:27:46,200 --> 00:27:48,920
Oh, yeah.

516
00:27:48,920 --> 00:27:52,320
But oh, but but definitely with that, with that.

517
00:27:52,320 --> 00:27:54,480
I know we've harped on it, but with that throwaway mentality.

518
00:27:54,480 --> 00:27:55,480
Yeah.

519
00:27:55,480 --> 00:28:01,640
For a lot of this stuff, it's such a serious issue that and again, I know inversely in

520
00:28:01,640 --> 00:28:05,920
the past, sometimes some couples will see together in an unhealthy way because they

521
00:28:05,920 --> 00:28:07,480
wouldn't want to let it go.

522
00:28:07,480 --> 00:28:11,820
And I do feel like that we're kind of at the opposite end of that spectrum right now, whereas

523
00:28:11,820 --> 00:28:16,240
I know, God, I know, I know some older boomer couples that like, Jesus, they were about

524
00:28:16,240 --> 00:28:18,720
three seconds away from killing each other at any one time.

525
00:28:18,720 --> 00:28:19,720
Mm hmm.

526
00:28:19,720 --> 00:28:21,120
Yeah, they were two seconds later.

527
00:28:21,120 --> 00:28:22,120
Story.

528
00:28:22,120 --> 00:28:30,720
The staying together for the wrong reasons is often worse than anything else.

529
00:28:30,720 --> 00:28:36,840
I mean, those relationships need to end far sooner than they typically do when they do

530
00:28:36,840 --> 00:28:37,840
end.

531
00:28:37,840 --> 00:28:38,840
Oh, yeah.

532
00:28:38,840 --> 00:28:42,240
Well, that's why, like, especially when there's kids involved.

533
00:28:42,240 --> 00:28:43,240
Oh, yeah.

534
00:28:43,240 --> 00:28:46,320
That's a whole level of complexity.

535
00:28:46,320 --> 00:28:48,640
But you haven't got to experience that yet.

536
00:28:48,640 --> 00:28:50,200
No, no, no.

537
00:28:50,200 --> 00:28:52,120
Especially not in this economy.

538
00:28:52,120 --> 00:28:58,160
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,

539
00:28:58,160 --> 00:29:00,640
no, you don't to **** dare.

540
00:29:00,640 --> 00:29:01,640
Don't you dare.

541
00:29:01,640 --> 00:29:16,200
If I get that phone call in the next couple of months, I'm going to child with your balls.

542
00:29:16,200 --> 00:29:17,660
OK?

543
00:29:17,660 --> 00:29:20,220
No.

544
00:29:20,220 --> 00:29:21,220
You got me off track.

545
00:29:21,220 --> 00:29:23,160
I lose track what I'm trying to do.

546
00:29:23,160 --> 00:29:25,580
I'm, I'm scrolling over here.

547
00:29:25,580 --> 00:29:27,580
Oh, God.

548
00:29:28,740 --> 00:29:34,980
Yes, okay. Nope, I lost it again. Thank you. All you think was just bad juju. That's all I could think of.

549
00:29:35,460 --> 00:29:37,460
Bad juju.

550
00:29:39,180 --> 00:29:43,340
Oh my God. We are staying together for the wrong reasons. Yes. So, definitely for kids that that's something that that's

551
00:29:44,100 --> 00:29:46,000
that I haven't really had to experience with that yet.

552
00:29:46,000 --> 00:29:52,700
But that's definitely something that like as long as you discuss and make sure you have the same values, the same morals, the same

553
00:29:52,700 --> 00:29:58,340
goals in a relationship and you want to end up in the same place and are willing to do the same things to get there

554
00:29:58,940 --> 00:30:03,900
they feel you'll avoid a lot of this stuff and be able to kind of keep on the same track, you know,

555
00:30:04,260 --> 00:30:09,580
but I I guess if I could have a little like a tiny little like two minutes set like like a 30 second

556
00:30:09,580 --> 00:30:11,340
so I would be like my advice would be

557
00:30:11,340 --> 00:30:18,500
just your morals your values your goals have the hard discussion ask details

558
00:30:18,500 --> 00:30:25,500
expectations is a big one to make sure expectations are in line for both partners both sides or if you're in a poly relationship

559
00:30:25,500 --> 00:30:28,020
as many sides that are applicable, but

560
00:30:28,940 --> 00:30:32,740
No, don't think he'd room exactly all that. Yeah, that'd be a messy bedroom

561
00:30:33,380 --> 00:30:34,900
but

562
00:30:34,900 --> 00:30:36,900
Just ask Bonnie blue

563
00:30:37,900 --> 00:30:44,500
Okay, the fact that okay. Well, let's have let's have a slight aside because I feel I feel like someone like her sure

564
00:30:44,500 --> 00:30:47,740
There's not many women that are gonna look up to it long story short for the audience

565
00:30:48,220 --> 00:30:51,140
Bonnie blue was a only fans creator. That's like a porn star

566
00:30:51,140 --> 00:30:57,380
Whatever that that slept with like a thousand eighty seven women or something like that in men and a few hours

567
00:30:57,380 --> 00:31:01,940
She now she has a thousand men in 12 hours to be fair. They're using

568
00:31:02,580 --> 00:31:06,300
slept with fast and loose on that one because I don't think that counts

569
00:31:06,300 --> 00:31:07,620
I'm sorry

570
00:31:07,620 --> 00:31:11,300
If if a guy told me something the girl it was last exactly 12 seconds

571
00:31:11,300 --> 00:31:17,780
I I don't think that counts, but hey sometimes, you know, you're just feeling it and the excitement stare

572
00:31:18,780 --> 00:31:24,220
Yeah, then she won't be feeling it. That's the problem you that that talk about one stand Jesus the one night

573
00:31:24,220 --> 00:31:30,340
You know it they were they were literally using the loosest terminology to what counted and

574
00:31:31,140 --> 00:31:34,300
Yes, a thousand men in 12 hours

575
00:31:35,500 --> 00:31:36,460
What's crazy?

576
00:31:36,460 --> 00:31:41,820
I would not want to be the last guy it's like pulling apart a girl

577
00:31:41,820 --> 00:31:45,980
She told you sandwich at that point. Uh-huh. Just well, anyways, sorry

578
00:31:48,780 --> 00:31:54,180
Oh my god, that's no longer spicy. Oh my god. I

579
00:31:55,420 --> 00:31:57,420
Could not imagine

580
00:32:01,020 --> 00:32:03,020
The person that has to get hired to come in

581
00:32:03,020 --> 00:32:08,140
Who is the person that has to get hired to clean the room that's my problem somebody with a fire hose

582
00:32:09,740 --> 00:32:13,900
Do they just build a shed to do that they just burn it burn it that's

583
00:32:17,460 --> 00:32:23,740
But what I was getting at is it's interesting that we've reached a point in I

584
00:32:24,460 --> 00:32:25,740
guess the

585
00:32:25,740 --> 00:32:31,140
hyper sexuality of people to where they're basically doing online competition between

586
00:32:31,140 --> 00:32:35,580
These porn stars essentially who could do them the craziest things. I remember a few months ago

587
00:32:35,580 --> 00:32:40,460
It was like somebody's up a 400 or 300 and then 500 and seven

588
00:32:41,780 --> 00:32:47,660
For some reason and this this is kind of the depravity of man. This is something that's actually happened before

589
00:32:48,220 --> 00:32:49,220
historically

590
00:32:49,220 --> 00:32:52,340
When heated is it kind of becomes a very big thing in society?

591
00:32:52,340 --> 00:32:55,460
You can look at even like Roman culture and Greek culture

592
00:32:56,100 --> 00:32:58,820
To where the depravity becomes so ridiculous

593
00:32:58,820 --> 00:33:01,820
after a time the

594
00:33:02,460 --> 00:33:04,460
I guess you could say

595
00:33:05,180 --> 00:33:07,180
the

596
00:33:07,180 --> 00:33:09,980
not not the refutation, but the

597
00:33:10,820 --> 00:33:12,180
absence of

598
00:33:12,180 --> 00:33:16,620
Morality, I don't say morality in like a religious sense, but more kind of a cultural sense

599
00:33:17,140 --> 00:33:22,700
Mm-hmm becomes so prevalent that people start doing some really weird stuff just to get noticed and

600
00:33:23,340 --> 00:33:26,780
It becomes the I guess the media attention-based

601
00:33:26,780 --> 00:33:30,700
The I guess the media attention becomes more valuable than the act itself

602
00:33:31,820 --> 00:33:33,820
Which becomes really concerning?

603
00:33:34,220 --> 00:33:37,300
Because you look at how how many men and women

604
00:33:38,100 --> 00:33:42,300
Or so I guess boys and girls, but how people growing up are gonna be watching those videos thinking

605
00:33:42,820 --> 00:33:46,500
That is any any anywhere anywhere close to the norm. Oh

606
00:33:47,380 --> 00:33:53,260
Anywhere close. I think that's one of the problem and unfortunately a lot of young men and some women

607
00:33:53,260 --> 00:33:59,180
but a lot of young men need to understand and I think this where I've take a slight detour the

608
00:33:59,380 --> 00:34:02,940
Huge problem that pornography has on the dating zone

609
00:34:03,540 --> 00:34:06,260
because it is an extreme fringe and

610
00:34:07,380 --> 00:34:12,500
Exceedingly not the norm because while social media has a tight grip on a lot of women when it comes to dating

611
00:34:13,060 --> 00:34:16,860
It's pornography that is a lot of tight grip on young men when it comes to dating

612
00:34:16,860 --> 00:34:24,820
You know a lot of young men need to understand that that is all of it 100% a fantasy

613
00:34:25,300 --> 00:34:31,020
Right. That is not how the real world works. Sure. You might get a girl like some fun stuff, you know

614
00:34:31,020 --> 00:34:34,460
I see. Oh cool. We get to recreate some of stuff great. That's awesome good for you, but

615
00:34:35,580 --> 00:34:39,340
These situations and how things happen and all that kind of stuff

616
00:34:39,980 --> 00:34:43,720
No, that is not how the real world works

617
00:34:43,720 --> 00:34:48,040
You 100% will not get somebody paying for their pizza like that. I

618
00:34:49,200 --> 00:34:51,200
Hope not

619
00:34:52,200 --> 00:34:54,720
Or so there'd be a lot more people lying up to be pizza boys

620
00:34:54,720 --> 00:35:00,040
I don't know right that would be the best job in America. No porn puts out a lot of

621
00:35:00,840 --> 00:35:02,320
unrealistic scenarios

622
00:35:02,320 --> 00:35:14,680
Like for most people actually having sex. I respect that's a

623
00:35:15,600 --> 00:35:18,680
It was interesting I actually saw um, so I watch

624
00:35:19,360 --> 00:35:23,640
If you ever heard of the podcast called the whatever podcast I find it interesting

625
00:35:24,080 --> 00:35:28,680
Because typically it'll be a couple of guys and they bring on a bunch of women that are either media influencers

626
00:35:28,680 --> 00:35:34,840
Expose. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah in what I like hearing is with a lot of talk about like yeah

627
00:35:34,840 --> 00:35:36,600
We definitely a lot of them even say like oh, yeah

628
00:35:36,600 --> 00:35:40,920
We definitely take advantage of men. None of us are responding to those guys. We're all taking advantage of them

629
00:35:40,920 --> 00:35:42,920
We're leading them to think

630
00:35:43,160 --> 00:35:47,340
They can pay on only fans and respond to these guys and get these special videos

631
00:35:48,080 --> 00:35:54,080
And turns out all you're talking to is other dudes that they've hired to respond to dudes or worse AI

632
00:35:54,080 --> 00:36:00,200
Well that that's the other thing is how many of them now with how good AI is getting?

633
00:36:01,160 --> 00:36:05,580
Especially there are some of them that are running a little porn houses essentially for all those only fans creators

634
00:36:08,360 --> 00:36:14,800
It's gonna devolve into a fantasy that is so beyond reality that

635
00:36:16,160 --> 00:36:18,160
Some men won't know what to do with a real person

636
00:36:18,160 --> 00:36:23,720
Mm-hmm. So some men don't know what to do with a real person now. So you're you're already at that bridge

637
00:36:24,120 --> 00:36:27,980
Well, it's interesting. So I I had a friend of mine. I cannot say

638
00:36:28,600 --> 00:36:32,080
How I know this person but a friend of mine through a friend of mine

639
00:36:32,080 --> 00:36:39,480
Basically and somebody came to me for help was like hey, I know someone who they try to date a woman and

640
00:36:39,480 --> 00:36:48,680
It turns out they had watched so much pornography that they could not perform the act

641
00:36:49,000 --> 00:36:51,000
Physically incapable physically incapable

642
00:36:52,080 --> 00:36:58,840
Okay, which I will I will admit for a minute. I laughed I will be honest, but then I sat there thinking I was like

643
00:36:59,760 --> 00:37:02,960
Wow, that that never actually occurred to me

644
00:37:02,960 --> 00:37:09,680
That someone could watch that much and actually that that is what they view intimacy as

645
00:37:10,560 --> 00:37:15,180
That that is their way of doing that because they wired their brain ever since they were a kid

646
00:37:16,120 --> 00:37:17,840
watching it

647
00:37:17,840 --> 00:37:23,800
Which if you have children that are watching unfortunately with the way phones are in the internet is I mean got someone start when they're 12

648
00:37:24,840 --> 00:37:26,840
Watching that kind of stuff 12 14

649
00:37:27,080 --> 00:37:32,080
Like it's scary. Look, I even remember when high school like I was in middle school just before

650
00:37:32,080 --> 00:37:38,200
Smartphones came out and kids are finding ways around stuff all the time at school to watch

651
00:37:38,200 --> 00:37:44,160
Well, I mean back in my day we had magazines. So it's been accessible for you know decades

652
00:37:44,720 --> 00:37:47,660
Yeah, and I mean back in the days of

653
00:37:48,280 --> 00:37:51,720
What as far back is like the the turn of the millennia?

654
00:37:52,160 --> 00:37:56,200
They had stone carvings on walls that guys would would slap their hand candles, too

655
00:37:57,040 --> 00:38:00,400
But the difference before was at least then it was all pictures

656
00:38:00,400 --> 00:38:07,720
Whereas now this is 3d interactive even VR was just gonna become kind of a sure augmented reality stuff

657
00:38:09,160 --> 00:38:10,960
I

658
00:38:10,960 --> 00:38:14,560
Worry that we're gonna see an entire generation of young men, which I think we're already kind of seeing

659
00:38:15,120 --> 00:38:19,360
that are not gonna know how to interact or vice versa a

660
00:38:19,960 --> 00:38:21,960
lot of large generation of women that also

661
00:38:22,160 --> 00:38:24,160
Don't know how to interact with men

662
00:38:24,160 --> 00:38:30,320
Well a very basic level on on the other side of that token thanks to daddy Elon here in the next few years

663
00:38:30,320 --> 00:38:34,080
You won't have to worry about interacting with people. You can just go fuck a toaster here in a little while

664
00:38:37,120 --> 00:38:40,800
You know, I really dislike

665
00:38:43,120 --> 00:38:45,120
Where that's going

666
00:38:46,640 --> 00:38:52,800
All you have to do is set one thing for one to a zero and now your dick is ripped off in the middle

667
00:38:52,800 --> 00:38:54,800
And now your dick is ripped off and throwing against the wall

668
00:38:57,520 --> 00:39:00,800
Like I do understand I bet you there are some men and some women

669
00:39:01,880 --> 00:39:05,200
that would rather just have the act done and they go on with their life and I

670
00:39:06,040 --> 00:39:11,400
Understand I will never be able to empathize but I understand well, how I think a lot of it comes down to

671
00:39:11,920 --> 00:39:17,240
It's just the interaction with the other person that they don't want to deal with

672
00:39:17,720 --> 00:39:21,320
Maybe there's been trauma. Maybe there's been abuse. Maybe there's just been

673
00:39:21,320 --> 00:39:23,320
so much

674
00:39:23,960 --> 00:39:25,960
Abrasiveness between people

675
00:39:26,160 --> 00:39:29,240
Social anxiety. I mean, yeah, there's a plethora a

676
00:39:29,880 --> 00:39:33,080
Little cornucopia. I'll drop some big words tonight. Fuck you. I feel good

677
00:39:33,240 --> 00:39:38,520
There's just been a lot of issues between people that have driven them to the point

678
00:39:38,520 --> 00:39:43,800
I would rather just fuck a robot than deal with an actual human being

679
00:39:44,240 --> 00:39:47,640
Let me get that nut and just go back to my life

680
00:39:47,640 --> 00:39:51,200
And I'll just hose it out in the sink and shame

681
00:40:02,680 --> 00:40:04,680
Just put in the visual there

682
00:40:05,120 --> 00:40:09,640
Why do I have the photo of just like you look over your neighbor and they're on their porch with their fuck talk on

683
00:40:09,640 --> 00:40:12,600
Hey, oh, yeah, just hose it out the wife, you know

684
00:40:15,760 --> 00:40:17,760
Girlfriend shit is full

685
00:40:24,120 --> 00:40:27,640
And for some people I feel like that is a valid option I understand that I

686
00:40:28,040 --> 00:40:31,480
Would not judge someone if that's like that's the perfect school, whatever

687
00:40:32,840 --> 00:40:34,840
What concerns me is?

688
00:40:34,840 --> 00:40:39,920
Is what if we have a generation of people that do that not because it's by choice

689
00:40:40,440 --> 00:40:42,600
But because that's what all they that's all they have

690
00:40:43,360 --> 00:40:47,760
If that is either the coping mechanism or that's just the easy way out

691
00:40:48,320 --> 00:40:53,540
Whatever because in the workplace in the real world men and women have to be able to get along and have to be able to talk

692
00:40:53,920 --> 00:40:55,920
socialize and

693
00:40:56,560 --> 00:41:01,080
If you end up end up world where if you end up in a world we are so segregated

694
00:41:01,080 --> 00:41:04,000
Along a gendered line like that

695
00:41:04,680 --> 00:41:10,400
Because men and women can't communicate because all the merch going home to their their fuck bought nine thousand

696
00:41:10,800 --> 00:41:12,800
And you know handle a business

697
00:41:13,760 --> 00:41:15,760
How segregated will the world really be?

698
00:41:17,000 --> 00:41:19,800
You know at some point you're gonna end up with some serious issues

699
00:41:20,720 --> 00:41:24,160
Because as much as you know some people like to say certain things or whatever

700
00:41:25,480 --> 00:41:30,080
Both sides kind of need each other you know regardless of what you think regardless of what you do

701
00:41:30,080 --> 00:41:34,320
You know I there are very few instances in life. I can think of where it's just like one

702
00:41:35,040 --> 00:41:37,480
Certain group of people does 100% of everything

703
00:41:38,840 --> 00:41:44,440
Yeah, it does life does not continue that way no yeah, we have lab techniques that

704
00:41:45,520 --> 00:41:47,520
Can make sure that the species will survive

705
00:41:48,400 --> 00:41:50,400
Sure, you know life

706
00:41:50,760 --> 00:41:52,760
finds a way

707
00:41:53,920 --> 00:41:55,920
But no we we have

708
00:41:56,240 --> 00:41:58,240
Gone millions of years

709
00:41:58,240 --> 00:42:01,160
developing the process as it were and

710
00:42:02,560 --> 00:42:05,760
You can't just keep doing that with robots unfortunately

711
00:42:07,560 --> 00:42:15,240
Well knowing that but I I would wonder how much effort would people put into raising quote-unquote their kids if they did not have

712
00:42:16,520 --> 00:42:23,360
That genetic connection because I'm not saying that you always need the genetics. That's not the case. Well. That's the classic nature version nurture

713
00:42:24,920 --> 00:42:26,920
But it is a component of

714
00:42:26,920 --> 00:42:33,000
Of knowing from both the parents that like oh, yeah, that is our genetic offspring that does play a factor

715
00:42:33,480 --> 00:42:35,480
It's not the biggest factor

716
00:42:35,960 --> 00:42:37,960
But it is a part of it

717
00:42:38,200 --> 00:42:42,000
And I guess I would worry about you know if let's just say eight generations from now

718
00:42:42,680 --> 00:42:44,920
You know this kind of trend continued

719
00:42:45,640 --> 00:42:51,360
You know would we enter a world to where only the wealthy only certain people get to have children or you know?

720
00:42:51,760 --> 00:42:55,440
Do you enter a world where it's actually more uncommon to have children than not?

721
00:42:55,440 --> 00:42:58,960
Um you know what just touching on that as a sidebar

722
00:42:58,960 --> 00:43:02,960
I do think there should be some requirements for people to have children

723
00:43:03,360 --> 00:43:05,360
Maybe an IQ test

724
00:43:07,120 --> 00:43:11,560
Maybe it's well, okay, okay, otherwise we get idiocracy

725
00:43:13,400 --> 00:43:19,280
Yes, cuz unfortunately the nature of it is most of the people in the lower end of the IQ system have like eight to thirty seven children

726
00:43:19,280 --> 00:43:24,760
And and the smart ones have one I know maybe maybe one I

727
00:43:28,760 --> 00:43:32,440
Would say maybe less of an IQ test, but maybe more of a

728
00:43:34,000 --> 00:43:38,160
requirement to your children to be able to things like you have a

729
00:43:39,240 --> 00:43:43,640
Consistent job you have a way to support yourself and enough extra money to support a child

730
00:43:44,240 --> 00:43:47,840
I do have in terms of a small little thing. I have an idea

731
00:43:47,840 --> 00:43:49,840
It's kind of a litmus test

732
00:43:50,480 --> 00:43:53,640
It's slight. It's a slight aside, but hear me out on this one. I

733
00:43:54,600 --> 00:43:59,360
Believe you and I I don't know if we spoke about this in another podcast, but if you put away

734
00:44:00,160 --> 00:44:04,800
Like ten thousand dollars this was not a podcast. This was just a rant that we had the okay

735
00:44:04,800 --> 00:44:09,620
Well this I want to talk about I want to see people's reaction to this one because I think I solved

736
00:44:10,160 --> 00:44:13,400
Retirement plans and everything else for most most all Americans

737
00:44:13,400 --> 00:44:21,340
Follow me on this one we can do away with Social Security. Yes, that's my goal cuz fuck the government, but the idea is

738
00:44:22,200 --> 00:44:24,200
In order for you to be able to have a kid

739
00:44:24,520 --> 00:44:29,840
You have to put away of $5,000 and the US government puts away $5,000. So $10,000 combined

740
00:44:30,720 --> 00:44:34,440
That goes into a fund that is only in that child's name

741
00:44:35,320 --> 00:44:40,320
By the time they are 65 or 70 probably say let's say 65 for easy

742
00:44:40,320 --> 00:44:48,960
That account will be worth anywhere from that like 1.5 to 2 million something like that with compound interest about an average 70% a year

743
00:44:50,320 --> 00:44:53,280
That means if we as a generation

744
00:44:54,240 --> 00:45:00,100
Decided to hey put away at least five grand and have the government meet you or even without the government even just do ten grand

745
00:45:01,640 --> 00:45:04,460
You would not have a single kid that have to worry about retirement

746
00:45:04,460 --> 00:45:07,740
The scary part is I

747
00:45:08,060 --> 00:45:13,580
Think a lot for a lot of people that would be a good litmus test to say hey if you can afford to do that

748
00:45:13,580 --> 00:45:15,580
You can probably afford to raise a kid

749
00:45:15,740 --> 00:45:17,980
Mm-hmm, and not saying it's foolproof. Not at all

750
00:45:18,780 --> 00:45:23,180
But well here the the flip side of that 80% of Americans couldn't do it

751
00:45:23,980 --> 00:45:27,900
Currently in the economy. No, maybe not people's voting patterns. Hmm

752
00:45:29,420 --> 00:45:30,540
Hmm

753
00:45:30,540 --> 00:45:32,860
Just saying but just just saying

754
00:45:32,860 --> 00:45:34,860
you know

755
00:45:34,860 --> 00:45:39,900
We wouldn't be in this massive for well, hey, hey, you know, hopefully things are going better. Well, but so far

756
00:45:39,900 --> 00:45:44,940
I'm not a disappointed man. We've well, you know, there are some things

757
00:45:44,940 --> 00:45:50,140
I've not been happy about too, but well, we'll do a whole episode about all that stuff. Oh, yeah

758
00:45:50,780 --> 00:45:51,900
valid

759
00:45:51,900 --> 00:45:53,260
but

760
00:45:53,260 --> 00:45:55,260
with some of these ideas

761
00:45:56,140 --> 00:46:01,660
The we kind of get rid of a lot of these other problems with people having children that either have no interest in

762
00:46:01,660 --> 00:46:07,740
Having children which unfortunately it pains me to say i've seen that happen where people just like oh I guess we're having a kid fucking yolo

763
00:46:07,740 --> 00:46:12,060
Whatever and they put in zero effort and that I don't know that that drives me up a wall

764
00:46:12,700 --> 00:46:15,900
Or worse. They just leave it to the other parent and be like bye. Have a great time

765
00:46:16,860 --> 00:46:18,860
Yeah, which is also insane

766
00:46:19,980 --> 00:46:20,940
I

767
00:46:20,940 --> 00:46:26,060
I can't imagine that like I don't know I again this this this this part here's my perspective

768
00:46:26,060 --> 00:46:28,060
But I feel like having a kid is a very intentional act

769
00:46:28,060 --> 00:46:33,740
And nowadays with all the different kinds of contraception if you're not picking not have one you're picking to have one

770
00:46:34,380 --> 00:46:41,020
You're saying yes, I want this so just do you got like eight different options if you really want to go nuts do something

771
00:46:41,580 --> 00:46:49,660
Something let me let me go off on a small aside on the the contraception stuff. I think they are

772
00:46:50,380 --> 00:46:51,900
doing some

773
00:46:51,900 --> 00:46:53,020
bullshit

774
00:46:53,020 --> 00:46:55,020
with the female side

775
00:46:55,020 --> 00:46:57,500
Uh, I recently heard a story

776
00:46:59,580 --> 00:47:05,980
They denied a young lady from getting her tubes tied when she was in her early 20s

777
00:47:06,460 --> 00:47:08,940
Because they told her she did not have enough kids

778
00:47:09,820 --> 00:47:13,500
Even though she said she knew she did not want any more

779
00:47:14,380 --> 00:47:21,420
The excuse was well, you might meet a man who wants some yes excuse the absolute fuck out of me

780
00:47:21,420 --> 00:47:25,180
Excuse the absolute fuck out of me. Um

781
00:47:25,980 --> 00:47:27,180
No

782
00:47:27,180 --> 00:47:33,340
If a guy walked in there and said I don't want kids. Here's my balls. They're going to fix him

783
00:47:35,500 --> 00:47:37,500
Where is the

784
00:47:38,620 --> 00:47:41,580
Uh line of or the scale of balance

785
00:47:42,220 --> 00:47:48,060
That is it does not sit well with me. I don't understand my my medical community women still don't own their bodies

786
00:47:48,140 --> 00:47:50,140
and i'm not even like one of those big like

787
00:47:50,140 --> 00:47:54,060
Abortion activists, but that I will never understand. I will give you a very specific example

788
00:47:54,940 --> 00:47:56,940
Someone in my family. I'm not going to name who?

789
00:47:57,900 --> 00:48:00,780
They have endometriosis where they have cysts in their ovaries

790
00:48:01,820 --> 00:48:04,380
Oh, they they need to have a procedure then not allowed

791
00:48:05,660 --> 00:48:12,320
Oh my god until she is 25 mind you she's been going through this since she was 14. She lives in daily agony

792
00:48:13,260 --> 00:48:17,500
But they have said because she is not old enough to to be able to go through that. She has to live with it

793
00:48:17,500 --> 00:48:21,500
Oh, well, they could just manage the pain for two fucking years. I told her she was crazy

794
00:48:22,380 --> 00:48:27,820
Rather than telling them actually doing the tests. We fought so hard to make to get the test to happen

795
00:48:28,140 --> 00:48:30,140
I will still never I will not name

796
00:48:31,340 --> 00:48:33,100
the um

797
00:48:33,100 --> 00:48:36,700
Sorry, anyways, I will not name the hospital because it will give it away

798
00:48:37,420 --> 00:48:39,420
But to that hospital, I hope

799
00:48:40,140 --> 00:48:42,300
Somebody from there is listening. They recognize who I am

800
00:48:42,300 --> 00:48:47,100
I will never fucking forgive you for what you did to my family member because it is ridiculous to me

801
00:48:47,740 --> 00:48:51,740
That for some reason certain people aren't allowed to have onus over their body

802
00:48:51,740 --> 00:48:55,660
And it drives me up a wall because guess what if somebody decides they don't want to have kids

803
00:48:55,660 --> 00:48:58,620
Why can't you respect that? They'll say oh, but you might want to change your mind

804
00:48:59,420 --> 00:49:00,380
and

805
00:49:00,380 --> 00:49:01,660
adopt

806
00:49:01,660 --> 00:49:08,780
Then we need more people to develop new fucking techniques that are temporary blocks that can be removed or semi-permanence

807
00:49:09,180 --> 00:49:11,180
Absolutely. There are several of those

808
00:49:11,180 --> 00:49:13,180
or like

809
00:49:13,180 --> 00:49:15,180
Not for nothing but adopt

810
00:49:15,740 --> 00:49:21,020
There are so many kids in these systems that would love to be adopted by somebody that actually wants to go through the process that don't go

811
00:49:21,020 --> 00:49:25,020
Wrong. The adoption system is is really badly run to need it's bullshit

812
00:49:25,500 --> 00:49:29,420
But I feel like if you want to fix abortion, you also have to fix adoption also have to fix

813
00:49:30,060 --> 00:49:36,300
Individual rights for that but like yes, that's a whole other episode. No that that one's coming guys, but yeah

814
00:49:37,020 --> 00:49:39,020
it's

815
00:49:39,020 --> 00:49:44,460
Aggravating has helped me from somebody from America that we cry. We say we have all these freedoms all these rights

816
00:49:45,100 --> 00:49:47,260
But on that road for some reason

817
00:49:48,860 --> 00:49:50,700
We're the stone age

818
00:49:50,700 --> 00:49:57,020
It makes no sense. And by and by the way, these opinions are coming to you by a couple of guys who are very very right leaning

819
00:49:58,380 --> 00:50:02,940
Yeah, like like i'm I I don't always agree. So like we're not all bad

820
00:50:02,940 --> 00:50:10,460
No, the thing is like I'm we're not all evil. I'm not like anybody crazy unless it's well anyways, but i'm not

821
00:50:13,100 --> 00:50:13,980
But

822
00:50:13,980 --> 00:50:17,260
Again, i'm very libertarian the fact that like your body is your body

823
00:50:17,660 --> 00:50:22,700
Like I don't think should be if you want to do drugs as long as you're hurting other people. I really don't care

824
00:50:23,260 --> 00:50:29,040
But if you go have fun, but if you also want to cut out certain organs as long as you know the consequences

825
00:50:29,040 --> 00:50:33,280
I think that's okay. That's fine. If you don't want to deal with them

826
00:50:34,320 --> 00:50:36,080
I get it like

827
00:50:36,080 --> 00:50:39,440
And also not for nothing who might have tell somebody else what they're experiencing

828
00:50:39,840 --> 00:50:44,400
That's one of my problems in the medical community that I really freaking hate is the idea that doctors telling you well

829
00:50:44,400 --> 00:50:47,280
Yeah, but you'll just deal with it or it's fine. It's not that bad

830
00:50:47,280 --> 00:50:52,000
It's like well to that person that might be they might be losing their goddamn mind over it

831
00:50:52,000 --> 00:50:54,000
That might be the end of their world

832
00:50:54,400 --> 00:50:56,960
You know like um, I i'm sorry

833
00:50:56,960 --> 00:51:00,720
You know if if a doctor told me that I just had to deal with it

834
00:51:01,120 --> 00:51:04,160
I would punch them in the face and say oh, I guess it was have to deal with that

835
00:51:04,880 --> 00:51:06,880
Well, I I remember watching a video

836
00:51:07,680 --> 00:51:11,440
There was a guy that was a guitarist that he got into an accident and he lost both his arms

837
00:51:12,080 --> 00:51:17,360
And he's on tiktok. He actually plays it now with his feet, which is kind of honestly insane. He can do that

838
00:51:17,840 --> 00:51:19,680
uh, it makes me just

839
00:51:19,680 --> 00:51:24,560
Consider sapuku a little bit more every day, but because he's that good with his feet. I'm like, Jesus christ

840
00:51:24,560 --> 00:51:30,480
I also watched him change his motor oil in his car by doing oil change and everything with just his feet

841
00:51:30,880 --> 00:51:34,960
And I was even more impressed with that because getting the plug off and everything and doing the oil filter like

842
00:51:35,520 --> 00:51:40,640
That's insane. That guy's more useful with his feet than half the guys from 18 to 24 with their hands. But anyways

843
00:51:41,760 --> 00:51:44,560
I guess he's gonna find a girl that's in defeat though. But anyways, uh,

844
00:51:47,040 --> 00:51:49,040
But

845
00:51:49,840 --> 00:51:53,040
This guy was able to learn and overcome these things but at the same point

846
00:51:53,040 --> 00:51:59,040
The doctor also told him like so what if you don't have arms like deal with it like that guy has every right?

847
00:51:59,760 --> 00:52:01,120
to

848
00:52:01,120 --> 00:52:07,120
Absolutely be like this fucking sucks and I want to deal with it in my way like that's fine

849
00:52:07,520 --> 00:52:11,680
But I see it all the time with doctors being so insensitive to people, you know

850
00:52:11,680 --> 00:52:14,640
I understand that like what if that's their first medical issue?

851
00:52:14,640 --> 00:52:19,680
Like what if they've gone through their entire life and never having any medical problems and you want that major?

852
00:52:19,680 --> 00:52:26,040
Yeah, and to them this this is this is huge. This is like life ending and they're like, yeah, go fuck yourself

853
00:52:26,040 --> 00:52:27,880
Not my problem

854
00:52:27,880 --> 00:52:32,960
It astounds me the lack of empathy and I understand the medical system. It's hard to work in that but come on

855
00:52:34,080 --> 00:52:39,400
Yeah, the the doctors get blind to it because they're or get numb to it because they deal with that shit day in and day out

856
00:52:39,400 --> 00:52:43,360
And they they just kind of lose the the human connection and the compassion

857
00:52:43,360 --> 00:52:48,720
But I feel like we've kind of gotten off a little bit of the topic no, no, you're you're good

858
00:52:48,720 --> 00:52:50,720
A lot of that needed to be said and I think

859
00:52:51,280 --> 00:52:56,160
There are different episodes that we're going to do where we're going to go deeper into a lot of that stuff

860
00:52:56,480 --> 00:53:01,520
But it's good that we've at least been able to kind of get it out into the air a little bit

861
00:53:02,800 --> 00:53:04,800
But I do want to kind of

862
00:53:04,800 --> 00:53:08,320
circle back and kind of cover some of the notes that we had

863
00:53:08,320 --> 00:53:13,040
Because I feel like a lot of these were at least worth mentioning

864
00:53:15,120 --> 00:53:19,200
When we were talking about the expectations in the dating world

865
00:53:20,560 --> 00:53:26,320
Social media we we both agree that that has been one of the biggest

866
00:53:27,600 --> 00:53:29,280
cesspool

867
00:53:29,280 --> 00:53:31,280
fake

868
00:53:32,240 --> 00:53:34,240
Guidelines out there

869
00:53:34,240 --> 00:53:37,040
It sets some extremely unrealistic expectations

870
00:53:37,600 --> 00:53:44,320
And I wish to hell I would have grabbed the link, but I only saw the video. It was a recent poll

871
00:53:44,960 --> 00:53:48,000
Suggesting that the air quote perfect guy for women

872
00:53:48,960 --> 00:53:55,520
As polled was a man that was over six feet tall and I believe they were saying between six three and six five

873
00:53:56,320 --> 00:53:58,320
making over six figures

874
00:53:59,040 --> 00:54:01,040
Which equated to around

875
00:54:01,040 --> 00:54:06,800
26 figures which equated to roughly a hundred thousand men in the u.s

876
00:54:09,120 --> 00:54:11,120
So you've got around

877
00:54:11,280 --> 00:54:13,280
25 to 30 million women

878
00:54:13,840 --> 00:54:20,880
You know air quote again roughly in that younger age bracket. That's ideally looking. Yeah in in that dating bracket essentially

879
00:54:21,440 --> 00:54:23,440
that's

880
00:54:24,160 --> 00:54:27,520
The that would be chasing the ideal man

881
00:54:27,520 --> 00:54:32,180
Attempting to get the attention of a hundred thousand. That's like a 301 ratio

882
00:54:33,060 --> 00:54:38,260
The I think it's three thousand to one or some shit. I don't know but the math doesn't math

883
00:54:40,020 --> 00:54:47,060
And that's essentially, you know the sixes through tens chasing the tens and elevens

884
00:54:49,420 --> 00:54:52,980
Everybody below the threshold is essentially getting ignored

885
00:54:52,980 --> 00:54:56,500
And those are guys that would essentially be great guys

886
00:54:57,540 --> 00:54:59,860
Great dads great partners great providers

887
00:55:00,340 --> 00:55:05,860
Everything they're just going to get neglected because who will their 511 they make 999

888
00:55:07,860 --> 00:55:10,180
Well, yeah, unfortunately

889
00:55:11,460 --> 00:55:13,460
The world has become so superficial that

890
00:55:14,260 --> 00:55:18,100
There's a lot of people that just look at the numbers. They look at it like oh, yeah sheet and they say oh, yeah

891
00:55:18,100 --> 00:55:20,100
Do they check this this this yes. Yes. Yes. No, no, no, no

892
00:55:20,100 --> 00:55:25,940
And they don't get to know it's essentially a speed date sheet now check check the box move on check the box move on

893
00:55:25,940 --> 00:55:27,940
That's from what I've heard from people that are like

894
00:55:28,740 --> 00:55:35,140
Like matchmakers, is that really they use instagram most of the time that look and see like do you have a house?

895
00:55:35,140 --> 00:55:38,740
Do you have nice cars? Do you have your stuff going on or if you're a woman?

896
00:55:38,740 --> 00:55:43,460
You know, do you have a lot of followers? Are you really attractive? Do you have this kind of interactions with people?

897
00:55:43,460 --> 00:55:45,460
Do you do traveling and

898
00:55:46,100 --> 00:55:47,700
like

899
00:55:47,700 --> 00:55:52,180
and like it really doesn't tell you anything about those people but

900
00:55:52,660 --> 00:55:55,620
For some people it's just a checklist and they wonder why?

901
00:55:56,420 --> 00:56:01,060
You know, I hear women to get mad at guys. Oh that guy's up with 300 women. It's like well

902
00:56:02,180 --> 00:56:04,340
Yeah, but they're all choosing to go after the guy

903
00:56:05,540 --> 00:56:07,300
It's like it's like if you got you know

904
00:56:07,300 --> 00:56:12,820
30 million people going after a hundred thousand and you wonder why each one of these like a rich fucking dude bros out in new

905
00:56:12,820 --> 00:56:18,500
York city is up with 300 girls. It's like well not for nothing. Y'all keep knocking to no woman

906
00:56:18,500 --> 00:56:21,780
Just you know sleeping with them. It's like which you know

907
00:56:22,820 --> 00:56:26,500
Let me let me kind of go off on a weird odd tangent for a second

908
00:56:27,220 --> 00:56:29,220
body count um

909
00:56:30,820 --> 00:56:32,900
If you don't have any diseases

910
00:56:34,500 --> 00:56:37,540
And you don't have a bajillion kids

911
00:56:39,460 --> 00:56:41,460
What does it matter

912
00:56:41,460 --> 00:56:44,020
You do not physically change. Yeah

913
00:56:44,820 --> 00:56:49,540
It's it's not like your dick gets shorter bigger or you lose a piece of it or anything

914
00:56:50,180 --> 00:56:53,300
Your your your your pussy doesn't open up

915
00:56:54,340 --> 00:56:59,060
And get looser with every guy that you get with if if a woman fucks 300 guys

916
00:57:00,020 --> 00:57:04,660
She doesn't get looser. It's the same as she screws her husband 300 times

917
00:57:05,620 --> 00:57:07,620
It's the physical equivalent

918
00:57:07,620 --> 00:57:09,620
Of what does it matter?

919
00:57:10,180 --> 00:57:15,620
I think the only argument i've ever heard about that one which this one I I do somewhat understand

920
00:57:16,260 --> 00:57:22,660
Is the idea of looking at statistical probability of if if let's just say theoretically if I was if I was going to date someone

921
00:57:23,220 --> 00:57:28,100
And they told me they were with 300 different people. I would say wow the odds of this working out

922
00:57:28,660 --> 00:57:30,660
Are less than one of 300

923
00:57:31,700 --> 00:57:34,020
That's less than 0.3 percent

924
00:57:34,020 --> 00:57:42,980
0.3 percent from a statistical perspective understand that like wow, maybe this other person simply has commitment issues not worth my time

925
00:57:43,780 --> 00:57:47,540
But i've never understood the other argument like oh that person's been ran through it's like well

926
00:57:48,660 --> 00:57:49,620
uh

927
00:57:49,620 --> 00:57:54,980
But does it really change anything that now if there's trauma involved in other stuff or whatever maybe you know

928
00:57:55,300 --> 00:57:57,060
That's one thing to be there

929
00:57:57,060 --> 00:58:02,740
But purely just the act i've never understood that I mean i'm i'm talking about what if you've got a

930
00:58:02,740 --> 00:58:04,980
a a guy or a girl who's in their

931
00:58:06,260 --> 00:58:08,260
You know mid to late 30s, let's say

932
00:58:09,060 --> 00:58:10,500
who just

933
00:58:10,500 --> 00:58:14,340
Didn't want a relationship and just had fun for the first half of their life fine

934
00:58:15,860 --> 00:58:17,620
What's wrong with that?

935
00:58:17,620 --> 00:58:19,620
Not a goddamn thing

936
00:58:20,180 --> 00:58:24,900
There's nothing physically wrong with them again if they don't have any diseases don't have a bunch of kids running around

937
00:58:25,860 --> 00:58:30,100
There's nothing wrong. They can tell you three and you're not going to know the difference

938
00:58:30,100 --> 00:58:35,060
Yeah, now they might have picked up a few different techniques that are going to blow your mind. You'd be like

939
00:58:35,780 --> 00:58:39,060
This this is a bullshit. She she didn't no not three

940
00:58:40,100 --> 00:58:45,220
You didn't learn that from three. She says oh i've never done this before it sends you to fucking pluto. It's like

941
00:58:47,780 --> 00:58:50,980
There's something going on here, but no I I actually agree with you on that one

942
00:58:51,060 --> 00:58:53,700
I I think it's a lot of guys and i'll call these out

943
00:58:53,940 --> 00:58:57,220
There's a lot of guys out there that are insecure about what they bring to the table

944
00:58:57,220 --> 00:59:02,180
And so they're thinking oh, absolutely shit. This girl's been with a ton of other guys. I get nothing

945
00:59:02,740 --> 00:59:04,900
and the reality of it is

946
00:59:05,540 --> 00:59:10,100
If you guys do a little bit of communicating with the woman that you're with and talk about some stuff

947
00:59:10,900 --> 00:59:13,460
Uh and learn what they like you are not

948
00:59:14,740 --> 00:59:20,180
Listen to me on this one. I can tell from experience. You'll have no problems just learn foreplay learn

949
00:59:20,180 --> 00:59:26,420
Learn foreplay and learn communication. That's all you have to do. Those two will get you further in life than anything else

950
00:59:27,760 --> 00:59:29,760
absolutely

951
00:59:30,100 --> 00:59:33,700
There is a reason why most days even if i'm dog tired. I have a smile on my face

952
00:59:36,820 --> 00:59:44,980
Yes, I know what i'm doing but it's but 90 of it is just communicating and understanding that you could sleep with as many people as you want

953
00:59:45,860 --> 00:59:48,980
It's not the person that if it's not that person that you're with in that room

954
00:59:48,980 --> 00:59:51,140
It doesn't really mean that much sure. It'll mean some things

955
00:59:51,780 --> 00:59:55,140
But like get talk with them. You'll learn about it

956
00:59:55,220 --> 00:59:55,860
It's not hard

957
00:59:55,860 --> 00:59:59,860
But I think a lot of guys are insecure with women that have like been with a few guys

958
01:00:00,180 --> 01:00:02,980
It's like I agree with you if there's no medical issues

959
01:00:03,620 --> 01:00:06,660
Why the fuck do I care like why?

960
01:00:07,460 --> 01:00:14,180
No, the only time I would care is if it shows repeated habit of commitment issues and like other like mental stuff

961
01:00:14,580 --> 01:00:16,900
Where it's like, oh, yeah, that's fair

962
01:00:16,900 --> 01:00:23,300
Did this girl's like 23 and she's been with like 75 dudes in the last three years like, okay

963
01:00:24,180 --> 01:00:26,100
maybe

964
01:00:26,100 --> 01:00:27,780
There's something going on into the hood

965
01:00:27,780 --> 01:00:33,140
But besides I you know, right as long as it doesn't show anything crazy, I think there's a lot of people that are insecure

966
01:00:33,300 --> 01:00:37,940
But there's a lot of both men and women now granted absolutely women not not as often but you know

967
01:00:40,740 --> 01:00:44,660
Yeah, so um when it comes to the

968
01:00:44,660 --> 01:00:47,860
Hardcore difficulties that both men and women

969
01:00:48,660 --> 01:00:50,660
Actually have to face

970
01:00:50,660 --> 01:00:52,900
Uh, I I did make up a small list

971
01:00:53,620 --> 01:00:56,020
And I wanted to see what you thought about that

972
01:00:59,060 --> 01:01:01,060
Difficulties for men

973
01:01:02,020 --> 01:01:04,660
Versus the difficulties for women uh for men

974
01:01:04,980 --> 01:01:08,500
It's difficult to approach women without getting labeled a creep or a threat

975
01:01:08,980 --> 01:01:10,980
And I put that one at the top

976
01:01:10,980 --> 01:01:14,900
Because it literally just happened to me yesterday

977
01:01:15,700 --> 01:01:20,100
Uh, I was out to lunch. I I had a bunch of errands to run. I stopped and got lunch

978
01:01:20,580 --> 01:01:26,180
Um, I saw a younger single mom. She had two young kids with her. She was trying to get her stuff together

979
01:01:26,740 --> 01:01:28,740
I said, would you like a hand?

980
01:01:30,500 --> 01:01:35,460
Literally all I said I had a smile on my face because the the two little girls she was with they were adorable

981
01:01:35,460 --> 01:01:41,300
The the one baby was just smiling at me and everything. It was it was just adorable. I said

982
01:01:41,460 --> 01:01:46,260
Hey, would you like a hand getting all your stuff together? She's like, I don't need help from a creep like you. Thanks

983
01:01:47,140 --> 01:01:48,900
oh

984
01:01:48,900 --> 01:01:52,820
Adam's just like yep, and that's why we don't talk to people in public anymore

985
01:01:53,860 --> 01:01:55,380
Yeah

986
01:01:55,380 --> 01:01:59,540
Yeah, that was that was fun. You know what? There's uh, sorry you go

987
01:02:00,180 --> 01:02:02,180
No, go ahead. Good. I was gonna say

988
01:02:02,180 --> 01:02:04,740
I there's a huge problem that like

989
01:02:05,460 --> 01:02:07,540
2% of men have ruined it for the other 98%

990
01:02:08,820 --> 01:02:13,780
Which is that 2% of guys are genuinely are creeps that are freaking weird women and kids

991
01:02:14,660 --> 01:02:18,100
and a lot of women are quite frankly very afraid and

992
01:02:19,220 --> 01:02:22,820
In a way, I understand. However, the problem that always becomes is

993
01:02:23,460 --> 01:02:24,980
guys like us

994
01:02:24,980 --> 01:02:26,900
always have to pay

995
01:02:26,900 --> 01:02:29,700
for what the other guys have done and

996
01:02:29,700 --> 01:02:31,700
That's happened to me before

997
01:02:31,940 --> 01:02:35,380
And unfortunately again, you've met me. I'm I'm a fairly big dude

998
01:02:36,100 --> 01:02:39,860
Um, I'm not somebody you want to like mess around with and as I've learned in the past

999
01:02:39,860 --> 01:02:43,860
I can come across intimidating mind you I'm a goddamn teddy bear of a person

1000
01:02:44,180 --> 01:02:48,660
But you know, I have been told my ass that like exactly. I know you you're

1001
01:02:49,380 --> 01:02:51,380
You're not gonna hurt anybody

1002
01:02:51,620 --> 01:02:53,620
You know, oh

1003
01:02:54,020 --> 01:02:56,020
God damn, dude, you know what? I mean

1004
01:02:56,340 --> 01:02:58,340
You're not that kind of guy

1005
01:02:58,340 --> 01:02:59,780
guy

1006
01:02:59,780 --> 01:03:00,660
No, you know

1007
01:03:00,660 --> 01:03:03,780
I don't want to like I was when I neither one of us are gonna hurt anybody

1008
01:03:03,860 --> 01:03:06,100
You don't want to get a fistfight with either one of us but like

1009
01:03:06,660 --> 01:03:12,660
Right. No, neither one of us are those kind of guys and neither one is neither one of us would put up with being friends

1010
01:03:12,660 --> 01:03:14,340
With one of those kind of guys

1011
01:03:14,340 --> 01:03:15,940
But it's a shame

1012
01:03:15,940 --> 01:03:18,580
That a lot of women unfortunately are so afraid

1013
01:03:19,300 --> 01:03:25,700
That they can't accept help from some of us generally trying to do the right thing at least offer a hand

1014
01:03:25,700 --> 01:03:27,700
And when it yeah, literally all I was trying to do

1015
01:03:28,020 --> 01:03:34,020
Her her young the the older of the two was just kind of like trying to get away and everything and giving her a hassle

1016
01:03:34,340 --> 01:03:39,460
She was trying to get this contraption onto herself to get her baby put away. I'm like, hey

1017
01:03:40,020 --> 01:03:42,020
Would you like a small hand?

1018
01:03:42,660 --> 01:03:46,900
And I mean, I'm saying it with a smile on my face. I'm still sitting down at my table

1019
01:03:47,700 --> 01:03:48,980
and

1020
01:03:48,980 --> 01:03:52,900
She just snaps at me. I'm like, okay. That's why we don't talk to people in public anymore

1021
01:03:52,900 --> 01:03:57,620
So from my experience, I could not help random strangers until I got a girlfriend

1022
01:03:59,220 --> 01:04:00,340
Because

1023
01:04:00,340 --> 01:04:06,180
When she's in the car if she's around they're like, oh clearly he's not a fucking weirdo. Whereas when I was single

1024
01:04:06,660 --> 01:04:08,100
Um, right

1025
01:04:08,100 --> 01:04:12,740
And that makes a difference when you're with somebody that's showing to not be a threat

1026
01:04:13,220 --> 01:04:17,540
That takes the oh, he's he's probably not a threat, you know off the table

1027
01:04:17,860 --> 01:04:20,180
But it was always a shame because like I'm a relatively handy guy

1028
01:04:20,180 --> 01:04:24,980
I can do stuff and I always felt bad and there were times the past where like you see somebody stranded

1029
01:04:25,300 --> 01:04:29,860
And I don't look whether a man or a female male or female. I'm like, oh, you know if someone needs help you help them

1030
01:04:29,860 --> 01:04:31,860
I'm one of those kind of people I

1031
01:04:32,100 --> 01:04:36,340
I think you know you make the world better one little one little act of kindness at a time

1032
01:04:36,980 --> 01:04:40,500
And there were several times I stopped to help and I would have people either yell at me

1033
01:04:40,500 --> 01:04:45,140
I had one lady throw a fucking shoe at me and it was like awesome after a while was like well fine

1034
01:04:45,140 --> 01:04:48,340
Fuck y'all fucking die. I don't give a shit like not my fucking problem

1035
01:04:48,340 --> 01:04:51,540
And thankfully like now with my girlfriend. She sees me all the time

1036
01:04:51,540 --> 01:04:54,020
I've stopped to help people do stuff, but because she's there

1037
01:04:54,580 --> 01:04:58,980
I can but it's kind of sad let you help them, but it's sad that I have to have

1038
01:04:59,780 --> 01:05:02,260
Basically another woman signing off me saying hey

1039
01:05:02,260 --> 01:05:05,300
This guy's not a creep in order for me to be able to help someone

1040
01:05:06,020 --> 01:05:06,820
and

1041
01:05:06,820 --> 01:05:12,500
It's just a damn shame that a lot of women have to go through that and thankfully as a guy like I've never had to really

1042
01:05:12,500 --> 01:05:13,700
worry about that

1043
01:05:13,700 --> 01:05:16,500
Because like if a woman's being creepy with me

1044
01:05:16,500 --> 01:05:22,100
I don't really have to that that's a problem. I can easily solve if a man's being creepy with me again

1045
01:05:22,100 --> 01:05:24,100
That's a problem. I can easily solve

1046
01:05:24,420 --> 01:05:29,300
So yeah, you know hashtags. It's good for me because I can make it weird with dudes real quick

1047
01:05:31,220 --> 01:05:33,220
Weird and uncomfortable

1048
01:05:33,620 --> 01:05:35,620
That's how I defuse

1049
01:05:35,620 --> 01:05:37,620
But yeah, so moving on

1050
01:05:37,860 --> 01:05:44,180
Difficulties for men the the number two that I put is we're immediately judged by our appearance

1051
01:05:44,180 --> 01:05:46,180
And no chance to talk to the woman

1052
01:05:46,660 --> 01:05:47,700
Yeah

1053
01:05:47,700 --> 01:05:48,340
Uh

1054
01:05:48,340 --> 01:05:52,660
Getting a chance to talk and initiate a conversation can make a huge difference

1055
01:05:52,980 --> 01:05:57,060
That's why as much as I hate it. I am still a fan of

1056
01:05:57,620 --> 01:06:04,500
the digital meat market that does exist because it allows the conversations to happen

1057
01:06:05,220 --> 01:06:07,380
And they get a taste of your personality

1058
01:06:08,500 --> 01:06:11,540
Before they get a taste of you in person

1059
01:06:11,540 --> 01:06:13,540
I don't like to use the phrase digital meat market

1060
01:06:14,180 --> 01:06:16,180
Could you not use that again? I don't like that one

1061
01:06:17,540 --> 01:06:19,540
I don't like that

1062
01:06:19,540 --> 01:06:21,540
But that's what it is, man

1063
01:06:21,540 --> 01:06:23,540
Yeah, but just I i'm not wrong

1064
01:06:25,540 --> 01:06:29,540
I don't like but does it make you moist? Absolutely not

1065
01:06:29,540 --> 01:06:31,540
Dry as a sahara my friend

1066
01:06:31,540 --> 01:06:37,540
But I will agree that I think that's that is one of the benefits at least you get to talk to somebody granted

1067
01:06:37,540 --> 01:06:39,540
It's usually a good thing

1068
01:06:39,540 --> 01:06:44,260
Talk to somebody granted it's usually over text which I feel like is difficult

1069
01:06:44,500 --> 01:06:49,860
Yeah, I I know I liked I will say I had a much better success when I was doing with the voice memos

1070
01:06:50,420 --> 01:06:53,460
I felt like that was way more personable. That's my one tip for guys

1071
01:06:54,020 --> 01:06:54,740
uh

1072
01:06:54,740 --> 01:06:56,980
Definitely voice memos if you can

1073
01:06:58,580 --> 01:07:05,940
Voice memos are good when you're texting, you know, try to arrange now this this is something that

1074
01:07:05,940 --> 01:07:08,740
This this is your your litmus test

1075
01:07:09,300 --> 01:07:15,700
Try to arrange within a few days of meeting via the the digital app try to arrange the meat

1076
01:07:16,260 --> 01:07:18,740
Don't set it for that day, of course

1077
01:07:19,700 --> 01:07:25,060
Try to arrange a meet within the first few days to take place in the next two weeks

1078
01:07:26,980 --> 01:07:30,580
That will set the tone to say hey i'm interested in you

1079
01:07:30,580 --> 01:07:35,620
I would like to for us to move forward and work towards meeting

1080
01:07:36,980 --> 01:07:42,500
That'll tell you right there whether they're even serious about anything or not because i've had people be like, oh I don't want to meet peace out

1081
01:07:42,900 --> 01:07:45,300
Why the fuck are you on an app? I know

1082
01:07:46,420 --> 01:07:48,420
That's I even had it by the profile

1083
01:07:49,060 --> 01:07:53,140
When I was on bubble and everything when I met my girl was like, you know, I even had in the app I was like

1084
01:07:53,540 --> 01:07:55,300
looking to

1085
01:07:55,300 --> 01:07:56,340
meet

1086
01:07:56,340 --> 01:07:58,340
Serious relationship

1087
01:07:58,340 --> 01:08:00,900
You know not here to screw around and

1088
01:08:01,460 --> 01:08:02,660
you know after

1089
01:08:02,660 --> 01:08:05,140
a few failed attempts

1090
01:08:06,020 --> 01:08:11,700
Um, it worked out very well, but yeah, definitely. Um, I believe that the phrase be date with intent

1091
01:08:12,660 --> 01:08:17,380
Yes, you know that that's a good one to put on your profiles is if that's what you're looking for

1092
01:08:18,020 --> 01:08:23,300
Put that that way the ones who are just looking for a fun friday night will pass you by

1093
01:08:23,300 --> 01:08:28,020
Because you would be amazed the amount of people that don't have hobbies or interests that just date because they're bored

1094
01:08:28,740 --> 01:08:29,620
Uh-huh

1095
01:08:29,620 --> 01:08:35,940
Fucking astounding serial daters serial daters. I I have it in the notes above and I might circle back to those

1096
01:08:35,940 --> 01:08:37,940
I don't know if i'm gonna leave them in or not

1097
01:08:37,940 --> 01:08:39,940
Uh, there are women out there

1098
01:08:39,940 --> 01:08:47,220
Who will date because they are simply bored or that's how they feed themselves a free meal baby will go out with men

1099
01:08:47,220 --> 01:08:49,220
Huh? It's a free meal, baby

1100
01:08:49,860 --> 01:08:51,380
Absolutely

1101
01:08:51,380 --> 01:08:53,780
The men are expected to pay

1102
01:08:54,580 --> 01:08:58,660
95 of the time for the date be it in part or in whole

1103
01:08:59,220 --> 01:09:04,340
So the women just go out with the men to get a free meal and that's what they do

1104
01:09:04,980 --> 01:09:09,300
That that's just what they do. There's no expectations of anything beyond the dinner

1105
01:09:10,260 --> 01:09:12,260
They just go for the food

1106
01:09:12,340 --> 01:09:13,700
and they

1107
01:09:13,700 --> 01:09:18,580
They ghost and oh I fucking hate ghosting. Oh my god

1108
01:09:18,580 --> 01:09:21,380
So that nothing pisses me off more than ghosting

1109
01:09:22,420 --> 01:09:26,100
I get it. Oh trust it. I've been the victim of that. I get it

1110
01:09:27,220 --> 01:09:30,500
Mmm, you think the conversation's going well?

1111
01:09:30,900 --> 01:09:36,500
They're they're they're active. They get back to you. It's ping pong. I mean poof god

1112
01:09:38,100 --> 01:09:40,100
Mill the fucking convo

1113
01:09:40,100 --> 01:09:40,980
Yep

1114
01:09:40,980 --> 01:09:43,860
What the fuck is wrong with people? Oh my god

1115
01:09:44,500 --> 01:09:46,500
Well, that's that anyways, i'm sorry

1116
01:09:46,500 --> 01:09:53,060
If they got 97 options and a new one comes around it's oh well, yeah, this this guy looks better

1117
01:09:53,060 --> 01:09:55,060
Oh, this one's way cuter

1118
01:09:55,620 --> 01:10:00,020
Doesn't matter that he's got three kids. He's not paying child support on he's keeps cuter. You know, it's fine

1119
01:10:00,020 --> 01:10:03,700
You know, it's weird like a slight aside. This can be a very quick one

1120
01:10:04,420 --> 01:10:08,900
The amount of women that I've met that are okay with dating guys that have multiple baby mamas

1121
01:10:09,700 --> 01:10:14,820
Oh, yeah, there's one that I know of that was chasing a guy being like oh, but he's so cute

1122
01:10:14,820 --> 01:10:18,740
He had five other baby mamas. She was like, I don't care if i'm the sexed

1123
01:10:19,300 --> 01:10:24,580
And I I wanted to yell or be like you stupid bitch. You think he's gonna pay you any money?

1124
01:10:24,580 --> 01:10:27,620
He's got five of the baby moms that works at mcdonald's you dumb

1125
01:10:28,420 --> 01:10:33,620
Just like wow, so needless to say like it's insane for some people

1126
01:10:34,180 --> 01:10:38,660
The the choices they will make and the excuses they'll make to be like, oh, but they're cute. It's like

1127
01:10:39,220 --> 01:10:42,260
Come on. There's some things that disqualify you. I'm sorry

1128
01:10:42,260 --> 01:10:46,260
It's it's the proverbial. I can fix them. No, you can't

1129
01:10:47,540 --> 01:10:51,460
No, you cannot fix them. I know no no no no

1130
01:10:51,460 --> 01:10:56,500
I've seen people try I can fix a lot of shit in this life. I can't fix that

1131
01:10:57,140 --> 01:11:01,220
You can't fix somebody if they don't want to be fixed in the rallies if they want to be fixed

1132
01:11:01,780 --> 01:11:04,660
Odds are they're going to make steps to make that happen or make the change happen

1133
01:11:05,220 --> 01:11:08,580
So it really takes you by the equation. All you can do is support

1134
01:11:08,580 --> 01:11:11,780
But if you're gonna wait around for somebody to hopes that they will change

1135
01:11:12,900 --> 01:11:15,380
Uh, that's not a relationship. You're babysitting

1136
01:11:16,180 --> 01:11:19,620
Like yeah, but no you you can either support or enable exactly

1137
01:11:20,900 --> 01:11:23,620
You know if advice I will say for guys

1138
01:11:24,740 --> 01:11:30,020
My girl immediately caught my attention the first date. She fucking paid for it. She bought the dinner

1139
01:11:30,820 --> 01:11:34,500
Yeah, oh, yeah, that that's if you want to get a guy's attention

1140
01:11:34,500 --> 01:11:38,020
Did you have to offer up your butt for that because holy crap?

1141
01:11:39,780 --> 01:11:41,780
It took me by surprise

1142
01:11:42,100 --> 01:11:47,220
She we she ordered the dinner and we were just hanging out like we we met because we were we were talking about a couple months

1143
01:11:47,220 --> 01:11:52,100
Before we met in person and I went to her place and we were just gonna have dinner. Nothing crazy

1144
01:11:52,820 --> 01:11:57,780
And we got the dinner and she paid for just don't you have to pay me and I was like what she was like

1145
01:11:57,780 --> 01:11:59,780
Yeah, I was like you're kidding. She's like no

1146
01:11:59,780 --> 01:12:04,340
Let me tell you as a man be wanting to dine for the first time in my life

1147
01:12:04,820 --> 01:12:06,820
I will tell you

1148
01:12:07,380 --> 01:12:11,620
You got googly eyes, didn't you? I was sitting thinking. Oh fuck

1149
01:12:12,500 --> 01:12:18,820
Ah, this might go all the way and two years later. I just got back from our anniversary trip. So yeah, it's uh,

1150
01:12:19,060 --> 01:12:22,740
Which a happy anniversary. Thank you. We can say that today b

1151
01:12:23,140 --> 01:12:25,140
Were you waiting for her to come back?

1152
01:12:25,140 --> 01:12:30,980
Happy anniversary. Thank you. We can say that today b. Were you waiting for her to come out with a strap on on?

1153
01:12:33,060 --> 01:12:35,060
All slicked up covered motor oil

1154
01:12:39,140 --> 01:12:42,020
But oh but it was it was one of those things where

1155
01:12:43,060 --> 01:12:46,660
Sometimes it's the little things we're showing a little bit of initiative like that

1156
01:12:47,460 --> 01:12:49,620
Is just the little things? Yay

1157
01:12:49,620 --> 01:12:51,620
Hey

1158
01:12:54,020 --> 01:12:57,380
But no seriously that that was that was fuck I still think about that to this day

1159
01:12:57,860 --> 01:13:00,100
And that's that's why we both kind of joke and laugh about that

1160
01:13:00,100 --> 01:13:04,260
But there's a lot of things that we both did for each other first that the other person never really realized

1161
01:13:05,060 --> 01:13:06,260
so

1162
01:13:06,260 --> 01:13:08,260
you know

1163
01:13:08,260 --> 01:13:11,140
The amount of women I have just talked to

1164
01:13:12,180 --> 01:13:14,180
Through like apps and stuff

1165
01:13:14,420 --> 01:13:16,900
They'll say oh i've never gone out on an actual date

1166
01:13:16,900 --> 01:13:22,340
Um, didn't you say you were married? Yeah. Well, he never took me out on any dates before though

1167
01:13:23,940 --> 01:13:29,460
Excuse the actual fuck out of me. What I will never understand that no

1168
01:13:31,220 --> 01:13:36,420
Uh the the the few times I got the opportunity to like cook a meal for somebody. Yeah

1169
01:13:38,340 --> 01:13:43,140
There was one girl like almost in tears she's like my my ex-husband never once cooked a meal for me

1170
01:13:43,140 --> 01:13:46,820
oh

1171
01:13:46,820 --> 01:13:50,900
And i'm like I I oh, okay, i'm sorry

1172
01:13:52,500 --> 01:13:56,500
That's something as a guy you you will stand out to so many women if you can do that

1173
01:13:56,900 --> 01:13:59,940
And I will be honest. I'm well apparently not because she left

1174
01:14:02,100 --> 01:14:04,100
Like she said the food was great

1175
01:14:04,260 --> 01:14:07,060
But then she left so whatever well to each their own

1176
01:14:07,940 --> 01:14:10,820
Yeah, she might have been crazy, but probably was

1177
01:14:10,820 --> 01:14:14,740
But for a lot of guys learning how to do some simple stuff is huge

1178
01:14:15,460 --> 01:14:20,340
You know learn how to cook like five meals. Yeah, like and get really really good at those

1179
01:14:21,380 --> 01:14:22,340
Yeah

1180
01:14:22,340 --> 01:14:27,220
But so moving on with the difficulties list. I don't want this to go to the three-hour episode

1181
01:14:28,100 --> 01:14:35,300
The last one I have on the list for guys is that digital society has made it nerve-wracking to approach face to face

1182
01:14:35,940 --> 01:14:39,140
And a lot of people just don't have the social skills anymore

1183
01:14:39,140 --> 01:14:40,420
thoughts on that

1184
01:14:40,420 --> 01:14:42,820
Well, you're number one. You're certainly not wrong

1185
01:14:43,380 --> 01:14:48,180
Number two. There's a lot of people that they don't have a third space and have a place that they socialize is no fraternities

1186
01:14:48,180 --> 01:14:51,300
There aren't many fraternities anymore. There aren't many clubs

1187
01:14:52,020 --> 01:14:54,020
social groups or anything

1188
01:14:54,340 --> 01:14:56,340
the reality of it is

1189
01:14:56,820 --> 01:15:02,100
A lot of people are locked behind their black mirrors all day anymore and they don't go do face to face

1190
01:15:02,340 --> 01:15:07,620
Yeah, and unfortunately I hate to say it because of the legal systems involved especially in certain areas

1191
01:15:07,620 --> 01:15:13,060
As a man, you can always face like a social backlash, but also legal backlash if you're not careful

1192
01:15:13,540 --> 01:15:18,180
And I feel like that's part of it to where like I know as a guy that that's pretty strong pretty well built

1193
01:15:18,900 --> 01:15:24,100
All a woman has to say is he touched me inappropriately and I get kicked out of that club permanently and I could have just been standing there

1194
01:15:24,740 --> 01:15:30,980
Like yeah on the other side of the room. Yeah, and unfortunately we live in a world to where like one accusation

1195
01:15:31,940 --> 01:15:33,940
Can lynch you can get fired from your job?

1196
01:15:33,940 --> 01:15:39,620
You could lose your career. Oh, yeah, if you get me too, you're done. Yeah, and I think for a lot of guys

1197
01:15:40,340 --> 01:15:42,340
That's fucking scary

1198
01:15:42,340 --> 01:15:46,340
And for me years ago, that was fucking terrifying

1199
01:15:46,660 --> 01:15:52,580
Are you kidding me as a guy that wanted to become a teacher and like if god forbid if I had anything like that on my record

1200
01:15:52,580 --> 01:15:54,020
It would be done

1201
01:15:54,020 --> 01:15:57,060
Just just instantly done. No, no questions asked

1202
01:15:58,020 --> 01:15:59,300
Yeah

1203
01:15:59,300 --> 01:16:00,340
so

1204
01:16:00,340 --> 01:16:02,340
That's the thing about it. I think it's a little bit of a

1205
01:16:02,340 --> 01:16:06,660
So that was what I had for the difficulties for men the difficulties for women

1206
01:16:07,860 --> 01:16:12,820
While there's nothing to say that they couldn't face the exact same things that the men have to face

1207
01:16:13,700 --> 01:16:14,820
I

1208
01:16:14,820 --> 01:16:16,820
Obviously am not a woman. What?

1209
01:16:17,060 --> 01:16:20,100
Uh, I know I I look so feminine

1210
01:16:22,260 --> 01:16:24,260
How dare you

1211
01:16:24,660 --> 01:16:29,620
Uh, so what I was able to find in in my internet foo

1212
01:16:30,580 --> 01:16:32,020
um

1213
01:16:32,020 --> 01:16:39,540
Women have to be wary of men who would who will or would take advantage of them or try to harm them

1214
01:16:40,420 --> 01:16:41,460
uh

1215
01:16:41,460 --> 01:16:44,660
I I feel bad that women have to worry about their drinks getting spiked. Yeah

1216
01:16:45,780 --> 01:16:51,620
Getting snatched off the street corner while they're trying to go to their car getting followed out from the store

1217
01:16:52,180 --> 01:16:54,340
All kinds of shit like that. It's terrible

1218
01:16:54,900 --> 01:16:56,900
Shouldn't have to worry about that shit

1219
01:16:57,220 --> 01:16:58,740
um

1220
01:16:58,740 --> 01:17:03,860
I I feel bad when i'm in the store and i'm going up the same aisle as like some

1221
01:17:04,660 --> 01:17:09,220
Five foot nothing hundred and pound little woman who's just trying to do her shopping

1222
01:17:09,860 --> 01:17:16,740
And there's this large imposing guy that's doing the same thing. She is and I can see her visibly getting nervous

1223
01:17:17,540 --> 01:17:20,340
So I just try to turn around go the other way. Oh, yeah

1224
01:17:21,220 --> 01:17:23,540
And I I hate that that's where society is

1225
01:17:23,540 --> 01:17:28,660
Well, it's it's terrible it is terrible, um, I guess the only advice would be you know

1226
01:17:28,660 --> 01:17:31,540
Number one if you're going to be out late or going out to clubs and doing stuff

1227
01:17:32,660 --> 01:17:37,700
Find some male friends or have some other people that can be in your posse just to be there

1228
01:17:38,180 --> 01:17:41,220
Because you strength the numbers will be in a mate. It's amazing

1229
01:17:41,860 --> 01:17:45,300
How much security just having one guy around can can be like again?

1230
01:17:45,300 --> 01:17:47,700
I have several, you know female friends that

1231
01:17:48,340 --> 01:17:51,860
That I'm friends with we all used to go to clubs and do like like, you know

1232
01:17:51,860 --> 01:17:55,620
Hang out and go places and the amount of people I know that would ask specifically to bring me along

1233
01:17:55,860 --> 01:17:58,100
They're like number one like we like to hang out with the also number two

1234
01:17:58,260 --> 01:18:03,780
Like we're all going clubbing and like we know you used to go clubbing and you never had any problems and like we're all nervous going

1235
01:18:04,100 --> 01:18:08,340
And I'd be like the the night chaperone. It took me wrong watching a bunch of

1236
01:18:08,900 --> 01:18:10,100
of like

1237
01:18:10,100 --> 01:18:13,620
Women getting drunk as shit and doing stupid stuff. It was entertaining

1238
01:18:14,100 --> 01:18:15,140
But also, oh, yeah

1239
01:18:15,140 --> 01:18:18,100
It was good to have someone there that like could handle a situation

1240
01:18:18,100 --> 01:18:22,820
That nobody's gonna cause any problems. You'd be like, oh crap that big guys with them. Yeah, I I need to write nothing

1241
01:18:23,380 --> 01:18:24,420
and

1242
01:18:24,420 --> 01:18:26,420
but it's sad

1243
01:18:27,060 --> 01:18:30,020
That they also wanted me there because they felt

1244
01:18:30,820 --> 01:18:32,820
of the security problem

1245
01:18:32,820 --> 01:18:34,100
which

1246
01:18:34,100 --> 01:18:39,060
It's a shame. I think unfortunately women have to learn, you know

1247
01:18:39,620 --> 01:18:42,260
Smart habits when it comes to being at bars or being at clubs

1248
01:18:42,900 --> 01:18:44,100
as well

1249
01:18:44,100 --> 01:18:48,260
As I always recommend this is to anybody learn how to properly defend yourself

1250
01:18:48,980 --> 01:18:54,580
Learn the legal areas with which you will live in about the ways that you're allowed to defend yourself

1251
01:18:55,140 --> 01:18:57,140
whatever tools or

1252
01:18:57,220 --> 01:18:59,220
You know knowledge necessary

1253
01:18:59,540 --> 01:19:03,380
But definitely knowledge is your best friend and training is your best friend

1254
01:19:04,180 --> 01:19:10,900
Making smart. I'll just go ahead and say this if you live in an area where you are legally allowed to and you are

1255
01:19:10,900 --> 01:19:14,420
By your jurisdiction legally allowed to own and carry a firearm

1256
01:19:15,460 --> 01:19:18,420
consider it learn how to do it, right and

1257
01:19:19,620 --> 01:19:20,980
Do it

1258
01:19:20,980 --> 01:19:23,780
A firearm is the great equalizer

1259
01:19:24,500 --> 01:19:31,220
A 100 pound woman can 1000 stop a 300 pound guy with a nine millimeter

1260
01:19:31,940 --> 01:19:33,300
Oh, yeah

1261
01:19:33,300 --> 01:19:35,300
When applied properly

1262
01:19:37,620 --> 01:19:39,620
And I think that's a good point

1263
01:19:39,620 --> 01:19:46,180
I end of discussion. Oh, yeah. Well, it's it goes to the thing of if you're going to do fun things

1264
01:19:47,060 --> 01:19:52,120
Learn to also how to be responsible for that fun meeting don't put yourself in stupid situations

1265
01:19:52,660 --> 01:19:56,580
But also be prepared to have the right tools and training. So if things do happen

1266
01:19:57,460 --> 01:19:59,460
You can handle the situation

1267
01:19:59,700 --> 01:20:01,700
I a firearm is a parachute

1268
01:20:01,760 --> 01:20:05,300
Absolutely, and it's better to have it not need it than need it not have it

1269
01:20:05,300 --> 01:20:08,500
It doesn't matter the size you are the skill level anything

1270
01:20:08,500 --> 01:20:13,860
Anybody can learn how to defend themselves and you can be far more effective than you think

1271
01:20:15,300 --> 01:20:19,780
And for a lot of guys they're not going to mess with somebody if they're armed or if they know how to defend themselves

1272
01:20:20,260 --> 01:20:24,500
Even if all you're carrying is a knife that's legally allowed or pepper spray or bear spray, whatever's allowed

1273
01:20:25,780 --> 01:20:26,500
I

1274
01:20:26,500 --> 01:20:28,180
I would definitely make an effort to do that

1275
01:20:28,180 --> 01:20:32,340
Especially for some of the goes in the nightlife a lot and goes out clubbing and stuff like that is up stupidly

1276
01:20:32,820 --> 01:20:34,820
Bring anyone major cities

1277
01:20:35,060 --> 01:20:36,500
trust me

1278
01:20:36,500 --> 01:20:37,780
Absolutely

1279
01:20:37,780 --> 01:20:39,380
Absolutely

1280
01:20:39,380 --> 01:20:44,820
Uh, so number two on the list for women, uh, they have to worry about their kids if they have any

1281
01:20:45,460 --> 01:20:48,180
As dating for single bombs can be an absolute nightmare

1282
01:20:49,060 --> 01:20:52,340
When when a single mother is dating they're not just dating for them

1283
01:20:52,820 --> 01:20:58,900
They're dating for their kids as well and any man that comes into their lives will come into those kids lives as well

1284
01:20:59,300 --> 01:21:01,300
in any long-term scenario

1285
01:21:01,300 --> 01:21:08,100
That has got to be one of the most nerve-wracking things as a single parent that I have to deal with. Oh, yeah

1286
01:21:09,380 --> 01:21:11,300
Anybody that I meet

1287
01:21:11,300 --> 01:21:15,460
Is eventually going to have to meet my kids and a I feel sorry for them

1288
01:21:16,180 --> 01:21:18,180
the the potential

1289
01:21:18,260 --> 01:21:20,260
Girlfriend, not the kids because my kids are

1290
01:21:20,980 --> 01:21:24,180
Well, my kids are awesome, but god they're they're going to drive that woman nuts

1291
01:21:27,620 --> 01:21:29,620
But there's

1292
01:21:29,620 --> 01:21:33,940
There's so much that a woman's got to worry about and and it circles back to

1293
01:21:34,580 --> 01:21:37,140
Is this man going to harm me or my child?

1294
01:21:38,740 --> 01:21:42,260
You know, there's there's so much broken shit in this world

1295
01:21:43,300 --> 01:21:45,300
I mean

1296
01:21:46,260 --> 01:21:53,060
It's it's so fucked I know well that that's that's why unfortunately with with layers of social interactions like that

1297
01:21:53,700 --> 01:21:55,700
You have to make sure that you take your time

1298
01:21:55,700 --> 01:22:02,260
Meeting somebody. Oh, absolutely getting to know them. It must be so much more difficult as a single parent that that I haven't had to deal with

1299
01:22:03,060 --> 01:22:05,060
but like

1300
01:22:05,860 --> 01:22:11,860
Don't don't do you know we talked about this. No throwing the juju. No, no heel bad dog

1301
01:22:15,380 --> 01:22:17,860
Shit so the

1302
01:22:19,060 --> 01:22:21,060
The kid stuff is

1303
01:22:22,340 --> 01:22:24,340
Definitely

1304
01:22:24,340 --> 01:22:29,940
The biggest hurdle I think and that's one of the reasons why I kind of advocate for meeting

1305
01:22:30,500 --> 01:22:32,500
Sooner rather than later

1306
01:22:32,580 --> 01:22:36,100
Is you can get a chance to just kind of get around that person?

1307
01:22:37,060 --> 01:22:39,060
And see if you get that vibe

1308
01:22:39,620 --> 01:22:44,660
Yeah, you know if if someone's a bad person generally speaking you're going to get that

1309
01:22:45,380 --> 01:22:48,020
I don't like this person feeling from them

1310
01:22:48,820 --> 01:22:50,260
And it's better

1311
01:22:50,260 --> 01:22:52,260
Than to do it simply

1312
01:22:52,260 --> 01:22:55,220
than to do it sooner rather than later because

1313
01:22:55,860 --> 01:23:00,500
If you've if you've invested, you know a month or two talking to them getting to know them

1314
01:23:00,900 --> 01:23:06,500
By that point you might just say I'm probably just nervous or oh, I'm sure it's nothing

1315
01:23:06,740 --> 01:23:08,740
You've already invested time into it

1316
01:23:09,220 --> 01:23:15,700
You you might look the other way and that might be all they need. So don't do that to yourselves

1317
01:23:15,700 --> 01:23:17,700
Don't risk that for your kids

1318
01:23:17,860 --> 01:23:20,180
Meet the person you're talking to soon

1319
01:23:20,180 --> 01:23:22,180
See what they're like in person

1320
01:23:22,660 --> 01:23:27,700
Find out how they act fuck find out how they treat waitstaff. That's a big one, too. Yeah

1321
01:23:28,500 --> 01:23:34,660
If they can't treat the people to handle their food with dignity and respect. They're not going to treat you with that or that well either

1322
01:23:35,380 --> 01:23:39,620
See how they treat waitstaff how they treat the elderly how they treat children

1323
01:23:40,820 --> 01:23:44,340
That will tell you a lot about a person and what their values are

1324
01:23:44,980 --> 01:23:48,980
And also I agree that the I think it's called the sunken cost fallacy the idea of

1325
01:23:48,980 --> 01:23:54,260
The more invested are you you are in something the more likely you are to continue going through with it because all i've already invested this much time

1326
01:23:54,260 --> 01:23:56,260
This much effort into it. I might as well see it through

1327
01:23:56,820 --> 01:24:00,180
And the reality is if your gut tells you something's wrong with them or something's up

1328
01:24:00,420 --> 01:24:04,980
You should probably trust that and not just be like, oh i'm just gonna ignore that

1329
01:24:05,700 --> 01:24:12,340
I know a few people have been like I mean if if you're in a situation where you've put years into a relationship, that's different then

1330
01:24:12,820 --> 01:24:13,940
well, no

1331
01:24:13,940 --> 01:24:17,300
If you've put years into a relationship, but then things change

1332
01:24:17,300 --> 01:24:19,540
But you still want to be in that relationship

1333
01:24:20,180 --> 01:24:22,820
But everything about it says no, I shouldn't be here

1334
01:24:23,540 --> 01:24:25,540
What do you do then?

1335
01:24:25,540 --> 01:24:27,540
You should probably have a conversation about that

1336
01:24:28,580 --> 01:24:32,500
And understand like why and how what's changed, you know, is it

1337
01:24:33,220 --> 01:24:39,460
You know something that's that's the internal value like a core value or is it a principle or is it just the way that it's functioning?

1338
01:24:39,940 --> 01:24:43,140
Is it how they're treating people? There's a lot of variables within there

1339
01:24:43,140 --> 01:24:47,940
You have to have the hard conversation to be like with that other partner like why have things changed?

1340
01:24:48,420 --> 01:24:49,220
Yeah

1341
01:24:49,220 --> 01:24:52,180
You know, what can we do? What can we work around with but

1342
01:24:53,620 --> 01:24:57,860
You know, I don't I just if you got says something's wrong, I I wouldn't ignore it

1343
01:24:58,980 --> 01:25:03,140
Yeah, you know at least address it because the worst case scenario if you address with your partner and they're just like

1344
01:25:03,620 --> 01:25:04,420
Oh, okay

1345
01:25:04,420 --> 01:25:06,820
I can fix that and then all of a sudden the conversation's over

1346
01:25:07,220 --> 01:25:09,700
Or the worst case scenario is they fucking blow up about it

1347
01:25:09,700 --> 01:25:13,620
And just like you know, then like whatever well, you know, and i've

1348
01:25:14,180 --> 01:25:18,100
I've run into this where just one side is like nope. I'm done

1349
01:25:20,180 --> 01:25:23,940
Doesn't matter what you say doesn't matter what you do. I'm done. I'm out and sometimes it's not about you

1350
01:25:23,940 --> 01:25:25,940
They just some people just walk away

1351
01:25:26,340 --> 01:25:27,060
Yeah

1352
01:25:27,060 --> 01:25:31,700
You know you you could do everything for them in the world still and they will not care

1353
01:25:32,500 --> 01:25:35,460
Yeah, that sucks. I'm ever running that a few times really

1354
01:25:35,460 --> 01:25:39,860
So, oh, but we'll we'll get to the last thing here

1355
01:25:40,500 --> 01:25:44,340
Difficulties for women they will be judged by their appearance immediately

1356
01:25:45,140 --> 01:25:48,740
And and that will dictate the quality of man that will approach them

1357
01:25:50,100 --> 01:25:52,100
That's true

1358
01:25:52,100 --> 01:25:54,100
And I think that's true for men, too

1359
01:25:55,460 --> 01:26:01,700
Um, but I felt just in what I was reading that it seemed to be more prevalent for women

1360
01:26:01,700 --> 01:26:05,620
Well, yeah, because I know there's a lot of guys that vice versa and I

1361
01:26:06,260 --> 01:26:10,020
Well, I I mostly put it there because men don't get

1362
01:26:11,780 --> 01:26:15,700
Men don't get approached by women as much as they used to these days

1363
01:26:17,220 --> 01:26:21,220
We we just don't get approached now, um, we get approached by men

1364
01:26:22,420 --> 01:26:24,740
That's not fun. Yeah, that's always a little awkward

1365
01:26:24,740 --> 01:26:34,020
But the women that get approached, um, how they look can dictate the kind of guy that approaches them

1366
01:26:35,060 --> 01:26:37,060
And that can be scary for them as well

1367
01:26:38,340 --> 01:26:40,340
Thanks. You don't want to attract the wrong type of guy

1368
01:26:40,740 --> 01:26:45,940
Exactly. That's how they're how they're dressed for the night can can say whether they're going to get somebody who's

1369
01:26:46,500 --> 01:26:52,740
You know, they're not going to be able to get a guy who's going to be able to get a guy who's going to be able to get a guy

1370
01:26:52,740 --> 01:26:54,740
she can say whether they're going to get somebody who's

1371
01:26:55,460 --> 01:26:59,380
You know just trying to get a nut or someone who's trying to look for a wife

1372
01:27:02,340 --> 01:27:05,700
It's definitely tough, you know, it's a tough tightrope to walk on that one

1373
01:27:07,460 --> 01:27:11,780
Yeah, I feel like um looking at our notes, I feel like we've covered most of

1374
01:27:13,180 --> 01:27:15,080
What we definitely want to talk about

1375
01:27:15,460 --> 01:27:18,100
Yeah, um, I mean i'll i'll kind of

1376
01:27:18,100 --> 01:27:22,480
of roll out the end here and just kind of go through this

1377
01:27:22,500 --> 01:27:28,680
little spiel I had. Meeting people is easy these days. And

1378
01:27:28,680 --> 01:27:32,400
I think we can both agree with that. Yeah. You can meet and

1379
01:27:32,400 --> 01:27:36,980
match with somebody on any of 1000 outlets. But what hurts

1380
01:27:37,000 --> 01:27:40,740
like nothing else is when you meet that one person, and you

1381
01:27:40,740 --> 01:27:44,360
don't just click with them, you get slapped like Chris Rock by

1382
01:27:44,360 --> 01:27:48,300
them. And then when you meet, it doesn't feel like you're

1383
01:27:48,300 --> 01:27:51,580
meeting them for the first time. It's more like you're seeing

1384
01:27:51,580 --> 01:27:56,020
them again for the first time in a long time. And things

1385
01:27:56,020 --> 01:27:59,180
progress and happen and you've never felt happier in your life

1386
01:27:59,180 --> 01:28:02,620
and you think to yourself, holy shit, this might actually be it.

1387
01:28:04,380 --> 01:28:07,460
And then you're stupid enough to let your guard down. And you

1388
01:28:07,460 --> 01:28:12,020
let your whole heart be exposed. And then they don't just rip

1389
01:28:12,020 --> 01:28:15,140
it out of you. They run through a blender back over with a

1390
01:28:15,140 --> 01:28:18,220
steamroller and toss it in a fire before they tell you that

1391
01:28:18,220 --> 01:28:21,920
they're done with you for any of 1000 bullshit reasons, none of

1392
01:28:21,920 --> 01:28:25,220
which you even had any control over. They're just done with

1393
01:28:25,220 --> 01:28:28,980
you. And then you're left to pick up the pieces and move on.

1394
01:28:30,700 --> 01:28:33,740
For all the guys that's happened to you learn that happens

1395
01:28:33,740 --> 01:28:37,640
precisely once before you put a wall around yourself that makes

1396
01:28:37,640 --> 01:28:41,180
Fort Knox look like a joke. And then you become dumb to the

1397
01:28:41,180 --> 01:28:47,500
world. Things get better. That happens to all of us, I think at

1398
01:28:47,500 --> 01:28:52,700
least once. And we try not to let it happen again. The dating

1399
01:28:52,700 --> 01:28:56,900
world is a mud puddle, not just a cesspool. But there are good

1400
01:28:56,900 --> 01:29:00,220
people out there. There are some pretty amazing people out there

1401
01:29:00,220 --> 01:29:06,120
actually. Not everyone's looking for the same thing. But I think

1402
01:29:06,120 --> 01:29:12,120
at the end of the day, everybody just wants their person. Yeah, I

1403
01:29:13,020 --> 01:29:15,260
I just have much to add on that one because I feel like you

1404
01:29:15,260 --> 01:29:19,260
perfectly summed that one up. I've got to said my piece. I

1405
01:29:19,260 --> 01:29:26,820
mean, I I would agree with you. You know, it's a it's amazing

1406
01:29:26,820 --> 01:29:30,780
how complicated the dating world is now. What used to be a

1407
01:29:30,780 --> 01:29:33,540
woman would just drop her handkerchief and say oops, and

1408
01:29:33,540 --> 01:29:35,660
the guy would go and pick up and say, Is this yours? And she

1409
01:29:35,660 --> 01:29:40,980
would say yes, right. You know, whereas, whereas now yet seems

1410
01:29:40,980 --> 01:29:43,860
like you got to roll some dice and then pull out a tarot card

1411
01:29:43,860 --> 01:29:48,500
and look at the stars and then hope you know, the wind blows a

1412
01:29:48,500 --> 01:29:49,740
certain way and you know.

1413
01:29:51,860 --> 01:29:55,420
But all right, I think we're pretty much done through all of

1414
01:29:55,420 --> 01:29:59,300
our notes and everything else we needed to say for tonight. For

1415
01:29:59,300 --> 01:30:03,140
those of you who are lucky enough to have somebody grid

1416
01:30:03,140 --> 01:30:06,740
good and great in your lives. Congratulations. Happy

1417
01:30:06,740 --> 01:30:09,900
Valentine's Day. Don't forget to spend everything you've ever

1418
01:30:09,900 --> 01:30:14,260
made on that person this weekend. If that's what fiscal

1419
01:30:14,260 --> 01:30:17,620
financial America demands of it, you must show love with dollar

1420
01:30:17,740 --> 01:30:20,780
dollar reduce. That's the only way that love is shown these

1421
01:30:20,780 --> 01:30:21,380
days now.

1422
01:30:23,260 --> 01:30:26,900
I've I don't know. We've always had the agreement at least over

1423
01:30:26,900 --> 01:30:31,380
here in my place that like we do something nice but like we don't

1424
01:30:31,380 --> 01:30:34,900
worry about the number. I'm being totally facetious. I know.

1425
01:30:34,900 --> 01:30:37,580
But you know what the crazy thing is? I know people that have

1426
01:30:37,580 --> 01:30:39,980
said, oh, yeah, if we don't like he doesn't really love me if it

1427
01:30:39,980 --> 01:30:43,340
doesn't spend a lot of money on me, which is insane. The the

1428
01:30:43,340 --> 01:30:47,700
engagement ring bullshit. Oh my God. Oh, he's got to spend

1429
01:30:47,700 --> 01:30:50,700
three thousand three three months salary on my ring or he

1430
01:30:50,700 --> 01:30:55,860
doesn't love me. I don't know what I'm going to do. Excuse the

1431
01:30:55,860 --> 01:31:00,540
actual fuck out of me. You get a ring and it's shiny. It looks

1432
01:31:00,540 --> 01:31:04,620
pretty. Who fucking cares how much it cost? You know, you know

1433
01:31:04,620 --> 01:31:09,020
how I know I got a good woman. She probably wants a ring from

1434
01:31:09,020 --> 01:31:13,860
Walmart. She or out of the gumball. Her and I both agreed

1435
01:31:13,860 --> 01:31:16,460
that we're just going to get like one of those engineered

1436
01:31:16,460 --> 01:31:19,460
rings and use the rest of the money or other like more

1437
01:31:19,460 --> 01:31:25,420
important things. Yes. Get a cheap ring. Do a small wedding.

1438
01:31:25,620 --> 01:31:29,100
Spend the fucking money that you would do on the big stuff on

1439
01:31:29,100 --> 01:31:34,460
something awesome. Go somewhere phenomenal. Make memories. Do

1440
01:31:34,460 --> 01:31:38,340
something spectacular that you would never do any other time in

1441
01:31:38,340 --> 01:31:42,100
your life. Do that with that person that you choose to spend

1442
01:31:42,100 --> 01:31:45,940
your life with and you will have a better fucking time that you

1443
01:31:45,940 --> 01:31:49,660
would have had spending ten thousand dollars on a fucking

1444
01:31:49,660 --> 01:31:54,020
piece of shiny rock. If the importance of your relationship

1445
01:31:54,020 --> 01:31:56,620
is to impress other people, clearly your relationship isn't

1446
01:31:56,620 --> 01:31:59,180
actually that important. You're in the wrong relationship if that's

1447
01:31:59,180 --> 01:32:03,060
what it is. You need to be that guy that was posing with his eight

1448
01:32:03,060 --> 01:32:07,420
flashy Super Bowl rings and his 23 year old supermodel girlfriend

1449
01:32:07,740 --> 01:32:11,140
so he can look like Danny DeVito pumping the fucking penguin or

1450
01:32:11,140 --> 01:32:22,300
whatever. But I think the smallest side here would be do

1451
01:32:22,300 --> 01:32:24,660
the things in your relationship that are actually important to

1452
01:32:24,660 --> 01:32:28,060
the health of the relationship. And if you're so concerned about

1453
01:32:28,060 --> 01:32:31,300
appearing, if you spend more effort making a relationship

1454
01:32:31,300 --> 01:32:33,420
appear like it's healthy rather than actually putting the effort

1455
01:32:33,420 --> 01:32:37,860
into the relationship, you have a fucking problem. And for all

1456
01:32:37,860 --> 01:32:40,100
those people out there that think that the value of the

1457
01:32:40,100 --> 01:32:42,700
relationship is determined by the amount you spend on the

1458
01:32:42,700 --> 01:32:46,860
wedding ring, I think you're insane. Especially the cost of

1459
01:32:46,860 --> 01:32:49,220
the wedding. Yeah, the destination weddings do those

1460
01:32:49,220 --> 01:32:52,220
piss me off. Actually, I think that's incredibly inconvenient

1461
01:32:52,220 --> 01:32:55,140
to everybody involved. I know some of them had to travel to

1462
01:32:55,140 --> 01:32:58,100
the Dominican Republic. They had to buy their own plane ticket,

1463
01:32:58,100 --> 01:33:00,580
their own hotel and everything. They were out five grand and

1464
01:33:00,580 --> 01:33:02,980
they didn't expect to have to fucking pull up that kind of

1465
01:33:02,980 --> 01:33:06,620
thing. Now, don't get me wrong. If you're doing a destination

1466
01:33:06,620 --> 01:33:09,500
wedding, you need to provide the plane tickets and the travel

1467
01:33:09,500 --> 01:33:13,580
arrangements. That's what I think. If you're doing a

1468
01:33:13,580 --> 01:33:16,740
destination wedding, you're that well off. Otherwise, fuck you.

1469
01:33:17,060 --> 01:33:20,620
Well, I guess the way I've always looked at it is I think

1470
01:33:20,620 --> 01:33:23,060
if you have a family and friends that like you care about and

1471
01:33:23,060 --> 01:33:27,340
like our local, you have the wedding locally. And then you

1472
01:33:27,340 --> 01:33:31,740
say, hey, we're going to be doing a getaway here, here and

1473
01:33:31,740 --> 01:33:35,780
here for a couple of weeks or for a week or two. We're on the

1474
01:33:35,780 --> 01:33:39,020
honeymoon. We don't want any of you fuckers to bother us. But at

1475
01:33:39,020 --> 01:33:42,180
some point we're going to be meeting up here. So instead of

1476
01:33:42,180 --> 01:33:44,700
having a destination wedding, you could do like a destination

1477
01:33:44,740 --> 01:33:47,780
getaway with all your friends and family to where they can

1478
01:33:47,780 --> 01:33:51,380
meet up and you guys can hang out as you please at the hotel

1479
01:33:51,380 --> 01:33:54,940
or resort or wherever. But that way everybody's happy because I

1480
01:33:54,940 --> 01:33:57,500
find it very annoying and sensitive to people because there

1481
01:33:57,500 --> 01:34:01,020
are some people that can't travel. There are some people

1482
01:34:01,020 --> 01:34:04,940
that have other obligations. And I find it ridiculous that people

1483
01:34:04,940 --> 01:34:07,340
think you're obligated to drop everything in your life because

1484
01:34:07,340 --> 01:34:12,660
somebody else is getting married. I would be so pissed off

1485
01:34:12,980 --> 01:34:15,180
if one of my friends was like, hey, we're getting married in

1486
01:34:15,180 --> 01:34:19,060
Scotland or some shit. I'd be like, so great. So the place

1487
01:34:19,060 --> 01:34:22,380
that I want good for you, the place that I want to travel to

1488
01:34:22,540 --> 01:34:26,340
now I cannot actually travel and enjoy it. I now have to worry

1489
01:34:26,340 --> 01:34:28,860
about somebody else's shit and getting obligated to go to a

1490
01:34:28,860 --> 01:34:31,900
trip that I didn't want to go to. No, I don't believe in

1491
01:34:31,900 --> 01:34:34,700
destination weddings. Absolutely not. Maybe it's because I don't

1492
01:34:34,700 --> 01:34:39,860
come from a rich family. I don't know. But like, come on. Be

1493
01:34:39,860 --> 01:34:42,700
reasonable, especially in that. I think I think destination

1494
01:34:42,700 --> 01:34:47,340
weddings are only for the people that can truly afford them. I

1495
01:34:47,340 --> 01:34:49,860
know. I think they should be shelling out for those. I know

1496
01:34:49,860 --> 01:34:51,740
somebody that works finance in New York. They just spent a

1497
01:34:51,740 --> 01:34:55,860
quarter million on their wedding. Gross. Yeah, that's what I

1498
01:34:55,860 --> 01:34:58,460
said. And especially with somebody that works in finance,

1499
01:34:58,460 --> 01:35:00,620
they would know if they just put away that quarter million, they

1500
01:35:00,620 --> 01:35:05,100
could retire with four or five million. But really, just because

1501
01:35:05,100 --> 01:35:07,460
they work in finance, the wedding was way more important,

1502
01:35:07,460 --> 01:35:11,700
right? Yeah, I the overrunner on them and being being divorced

1503
01:35:11,700 --> 01:35:15,220
is like two years with that wedding went. So yeah, that

1504
01:35:15,220 --> 01:35:18,500
quarter mill was so worth it, I bet. Yeah. And the crazy thing

1505
01:35:18,500 --> 01:35:22,060
is if they divorce, she still gets the money. Holy shit.

1506
01:35:22,060 --> 01:35:24,740
Let's think about that. Well, that that preen up is ironclad, I

1507
01:35:24,740 --> 01:35:31,620
bet. Yeah, just just just be careful, folks. Yeah. Make sure

1508
01:35:31,620 --> 01:35:34,420
you marry the right person and choose your partners wisely.

1509
01:35:34,460 --> 01:35:40,220
Yeah, yeah. Or at least do your best, you know. But yeah, I

1510
01:35:40,220 --> 01:35:45,980
think that's pretty much all we've got for tonight. socials,

1511
01:35:46,460 --> 01:35:52,660
discord. And next week. Yeah, make sure to definitely join us

1512
01:35:52,660 --> 01:35:55,780
on our social media and make sure please join the discord. We

1513
01:35:55,780 --> 01:35:57,900
definitely want to get that place hop in some time soon.

1514
01:35:58,660 --> 01:36:00,620
And we're gonna have to find a giveaway or something to do to

1515
01:36:00,620 --> 01:36:04,060
get people to join. I think so we'll work on something. I'm

1516
01:36:04,060 --> 01:36:06,020
gonna have to start sending pictures of the ice cream cone

1517
01:36:06,020 --> 01:36:09,820
out or something. I don't know. See now. Now that life has

1518
01:36:09,820 --> 01:36:11,900
stopped using me as a flashlight, I can actually get

1519
01:36:11,900 --> 01:36:15,860
back to having a regular fucking. You say the magic word.

1520
01:36:15,940 --> 01:36:19,660
I know. Hey, Alexa, no, we're being a flashlight.

1521
01:36:21,980 --> 01:36:22,940
You're not allowed to do that.

1522
01:36:26,780 --> 01:36:28,820
It's okay. It's the end of the episode. No one makes it here.

1523
01:36:31,540 --> 01:36:33,740
We just want to say thank you all for listening. We really

1524
01:36:33,740 --> 01:36:35,660
appreciate it. We've been getting some wonderful feedback

1525
01:36:35,660 --> 01:36:38,860
and we can't wait to come back again. Thank you all and we

1526
01:36:38,860 --> 01:36:42,540
shall catch on the next episode. Hell yeah. See you then.