WEBVTT 00:00:06.349 --> 00:00:08.630 What do you do when you're standing at the edge 00:00:08.630 --> 00:00:12.070 of something new or even just in the scary parts 00:00:12.070 --> 00:00:15.789 of contemplating a change? But you have no idea 00:00:15.789 --> 00:00:20.589 what comes next. Feedback from my last solo episode, 00:00:20.670 --> 00:00:23.850 number 35, about my transition out of teaching 00:00:23.850 --> 00:00:27.670 and my next steps confirmed what I already knew. 00:00:28.329 --> 00:00:31.929 Many people, educators especially, are worried 00:00:31.929 --> 00:00:35.090 about how many more years they have left in them. 00:00:35.579 --> 00:00:38.460 and how to respond to feeling the mixed emotions 00:00:38.460 --> 00:00:41.259 that come along with being in those feelings. 00:00:42.159 --> 00:00:45.159 This episode is all about giving yourself permission 00:00:45.159 --> 00:00:49.140 to not have it all figured out. There is this 00:00:49.140 --> 00:00:53.340 pressure to have a five -year plan, especially 00:00:53.340 --> 00:00:56.200 teachers who've lived by bells and calendars 00:00:56.200 --> 00:01:00.609 for decades. I remember how I felt the day after 00:01:00.609 --> 00:01:04.269 I resigned or especially the day after I got 00:01:04.269 --> 00:01:06.549 the email saying the school board had approved 00:01:06.549 --> 00:01:10.349 my resignation and I still didn't have a job 00:01:10.349 --> 00:01:15.269 locked in or secured. I felt totally unmoored, 00:01:15.810 --> 00:01:20.569 but also still optimistic. So for anyone standing 00:01:20.569 --> 00:01:24.250 at a crossroads, unsure of what's next, this 00:01:24.250 --> 00:01:27.700 conversation is meant to offer comfort guidance, 00:01:28.040 --> 00:01:31.400 and a gentle push toward trusting the process. 00:01:32.099 --> 00:01:35.040 I see you out there. You don't need to know the 00:01:35.040 --> 00:01:37.780 whole path. You just need the courage to take 00:01:37.780 --> 00:01:41.340 the next step. Today I'll share what helped me 00:01:41.340 --> 00:01:44.239 sit with the unknown, what I've learned from 00:01:44.239 --> 00:01:47.359 others who've been here, and how you can trust 00:01:47.359 --> 00:01:50.900 yourself even when the road isn't clear. I'll 00:01:50.900 --> 00:01:54.219 offer specific advice and resources from professionals 00:01:54.219 --> 00:01:57.879 in this area. with the hope of helping you gain 00:01:57.879 --> 00:02:01.540 some clarity with your thoughts. So let's dig 00:02:01.540 --> 00:02:08.849 in. Thank you for joining me for another episode 00:02:08.849 --> 00:02:11.650 of Life's Next Lesson Plan. I'm Rachel and I 00:02:11.650 --> 00:02:14.689 started this podcast during my 29th and last 00:02:14.689 --> 00:02:17.189 year as a high school teacher. The goal of my 00:02:17.189 --> 00:02:19.689 work with Life's Next Lesson Plan as well as 00:02:19.689 --> 00:02:22.669 my Live and Learn Patreon is to create a connection 00:02:22.669 --> 00:02:25.449 where we are all teachers. We all have lessons 00:02:25.449 --> 00:02:28.430 and stories to share that can help others. I'm 00:02:28.430 --> 00:02:30.830 so fortunate to be able to extend the four walls 00:02:30.830 --> 00:02:34.330 of my previous classroom to an unlimited audience. 00:02:35.000 --> 00:02:37.580 where we can all learn from each other. And my 00:02:37.580 --> 00:02:40.080 guests are some of the most inspirational people 00:02:40.080 --> 00:02:43.139 with the best stories and lessons I know, which 00:02:43.139 --> 00:02:46.340 is why I want to share them with you. Their words 00:02:46.340 --> 00:02:49.000 are something everyone should hear. It is my 00:02:49.000 --> 00:02:50.759 hope that you are able to take away something 00:02:50.759 --> 00:02:53.800 from each episode to apply to your own life, 00:02:54.060 --> 00:02:56.919 whether that be a career search, path to a more 00:02:56.919 --> 00:03:00.560 fulfilling life, or new ideas on current topics. 00:03:02.189 --> 00:03:06.710 Before we begin today, I just want to say I understand 00:03:06.710 --> 00:03:11.270 the feelings the mixed feelings that come with 00:03:11.270 --> 00:03:15.379 leaving a career after three decades. That was 00:03:15.379 --> 00:03:17.840 part of your identity that you poured your heart 00:03:17.840 --> 00:03:21.699 and soul into that affected others' lives. There 00:03:21.699 --> 00:03:26.500 is guilt. There is guilt from other people. There 00:03:26.500 --> 00:03:31.840 are a lot of messages, okay? And this was not 00:03:31.840 --> 00:03:34.400 a decision that I all of a sudden one day woke 00:03:34.400 --> 00:03:38.870 up and made. I had been having thoughts and conversations 00:03:38.870 --> 00:03:44.030 and trying to plan for it for years. Now there 00:03:44.030 --> 00:03:47.270 did become a time after a conversation where 00:03:47.270 --> 00:03:50.159 I was like, I have to do this. I have to just 00:03:50.159 --> 00:03:52.939 rip the bandaid or I'm going to continue to stay 00:03:52.939 --> 00:03:56.560 in my comfort zone. But that did not just happen 00:03:56.560 --> 00:03:59.300 overnight. That was after years of conversations 00:03:59.300 --> 00:04:03.560 and crying and mixed emotions. So please know 00:04:03.560 --> 00:04:08.500 that I understand all of it. Okay. Now also understand 00:04:08.500 --> 00:04:13.439 that I am anybody who knows me, a recovering 00:04:13.439 --> 00:04:18.759 perfectionist, a very type A first born Leo planner. 00:04:19.660 --> 00:04:22.579 Okay, any of you who know my life story know 00:04:22.579 --> 00:04:26.920 know that I was the oldest child of four and 00:04:26.920 --> 00:04:31.540 a first generation college student. I put myself 00:04:31.540 --> 00:04:34.839 through college working multiple jobs, you know, 00:04:35.060 --> 00:04:38.720 from the time that I was 18, it was, you know, 00:04:38.899 --> 00:04:43.600 on me. Okay, so I have never been without a job. 00:04:44.240 --> 00:04:48.540 I have always known that if I am going to quit 00:04:48.540 --> 00:04:51.939 a job, I have to already have a job secured. 00:04:52.500 --> 00:04:57.300 This is the first time in my life now. I did 00:04:57.300 --> 00:04:59.060 have months and months and months to prepare 00:04:59.060 --> 00:05:03.040 to get a job, but I was in limbo. Like I made 00:05:03.040 --> 00:05:05.639 the decision, I resigned, the school board approved 00:05:05.639 --> 00:05:08.519 my resignation, and I still did not have a job, 00:05:08.779 --> 00:05:13.490 okay? And... at the end there was sort of putting 00:05:13.490 --> 00:05:16.629 all my eggs into one basket. Although as I did 00:05:16.629 --> 00:05:20.949 share in my last episode, I had a fallback, fallback, 00:05:21.089 --> 00:05:25.730 fallback. So it was the last resort working, 00:05:25.990 --> 00:05:28.490 you know, taking my part -time job that I hold 00:05:28.490 --> 00:05:33.009 just because I'm that kind of insecure person 00:05:33.009 --> 00:05:36.639 who needs. security, financially, just I've grown 00:05:36.639 --> 00:05:40.399 up that way. If you listen to my last guest episode 00:05:40.399 --> 00:05:44.139 on money scarcity mindset, there is a reason 00:05:44.139 --> 00:05:48.220 I was drawn to her and her message. So I did 00:05:48.220 --> 00:05:52.279 have that. And that is what ultimately, you know, 00:05:52.279 --> 00:05:56.819 I said to myself, it is that bad that if I quit 00:05:56.819 --> 00:06:01.000 teaching and I have to work for It's not minimum 00:06:01.000 --> 00:06:04.579 wage, but it's not much more. And be a manager 00:06:04.579 --> 00:06:09.839 at this big retailer, I will do it. And at any 00:06:09.839 --> 00:06:12.759 point, I can still do that, and I will hold onto 00:06:12.759 --> 00:06:15.459 that job for four hours a month until I feel 00:06:15.459 --> 00:06:18.879 like I don't need to. That's just who I am. So 00:06:18.879 --> 00:06:24.569 know that, okay? It is totally normal. to feel 00:06:24.569 --> 00:06:29.170 freaked out, scared. Believe me, I have a daughter 00:06:29.170 --> 00:06:33.449 starting college and I've done this at the same 00:06:33.449 --> 00:06:39.750 time. So all I know is that I really had to dig 00:06:39.750 --> 00:06:44.029 into personal development and switch my mindset. 00:06:44.250 --> 00:06:48.069 to want of abundance instead of scarcity. I have 00:06:48.069 --> 00:06:51.350 lived my whole life in a scarcity mindset and 00:06:51.350 --> 00:06:53.670 that's why I brought the last guest on for you. 00:06:53.750 --> 00:06:56.250 That's why I'm going to be sharing some people 00:06:56.250 --> 00:07:00.769 today who I think can help us switch these mindsets 00:07:00.769 --> 00:07:05.009 a little bit and know that it's okay. Now one 00:07:05.009 --> 00:07:07.470 thing I do want to warn against especially for 00:07:07.470 --> 00:07:12.029 teachers and again I don't know except for the 00:07:12.430 --> 00:07:15.689 transitioning teacher program I went through, 00:07:16.009 --> 00:07:19.209 which is called ADA, Applied Instructional Design 00:07:19.209 --> 00:07:22.490 Academy, and actually it was very well done. 00:07:22.769 --> 00:07:27.110 Every single person in my cohort was an educator 00:07:27.110 --> 00:07:31.170 who successfully transitioned out of education 00:07:31.170 --> 00:07:34.709 and into instructional design. They're all employed 00:07:34.709 --> 00:07:36.829 instructional designers now, every single one 00:07:36.829 --> 00:07:41.160 but me. Most of them are working hybrid or remotely 00:07:41.160 --> 00:07:46.199 and enjoying it. So they pursued it. Some got 00:07:46.199 --> 00:07:49.259 jobs right away. Some it took quite a long time, 00:07:49.800 --> 00:07:52.199 like a year and a half, I would say the longest. 00:07:52.319 --> 00:07:58.000 But there are many posts on LinkedIn for transitioning 00:07:58.000 --> 00:08:02.019 teachers because this is a huge market right 00:08:02.019 --> 00:08:06.899 now. Okay, so please be careful. They're very 00:08:06.899 --> 00:08:10.759 convincing, you know, it's desperate times, right? 00:08:10.819 --> 00:08:14.860 So we want help. And by all means, if you feel 00:08:14.860 --> 00:08:18.259 you find one that you think could help you, I 00:08:18.259 --> 00:08:21.000 just want you to be aware that this is big business 00:08:21.000 --> 00:08:24.519 right now. And vet, you know, if you do end up 00:08:24.519 --> 00:08:27.120 giving your money to someone, please be sure 00:08:27.120 --> 00:08:32.759 to vet them, okay? So. With that, I'm going to 00:08:32.759 --> 00:08:36.620 talk today about some references that we can 00:08:36.620 --> 00:08:42.480 use to help us through this transition. Some 00:08:42.480 --> 00:08:45.820 TED Talks, some books, some personal development, 00:08:45.919 --> 00:08:48.460 which I think, you know, the more you fill your 00:08:48.460 --> 00:08:53.600 mind with positive thinking, The more you manifest, 00:08:53.620 --> 00:08:57.580 and I never manifested anything in my life until 00:08:57.580 --> 00:09:02.580 the last year or two or three of my life, I now 00:09:02.580 --> 00:09:07.299 believe it works. If you have a list and you 00:09:07.299 --> 00:09:10.480 will not settle and you keep saying to yourself, 00:09:10.639 --> 00:09:14.120 I am going to get what's on this list, I deserve 00:09:14.120 --> 00:09:16.600 it, I'm worthy, I've worked hard, I'm a good 00:09:16.600 --> 00:09:22.289 person, it will happen. And again, I've had a 00:09:22.289 --> 00:09:26.149 lot of guests who have stories that confirm that. 00:09:26.470 --> 00:09:29.909 And now I'm actually a living, breathing example 00:09:29.909 --> 00:09:32.590 of that. And I never, it's like, that'll never 00:09:32.590 --> 00:09:35.450 happen for me, right? That was always my mindset. 00:09:36.649 --> 00:09:40.570 So the first resource I'm going to talk about 00:09:40.570 --> 00:09:45.840 today is Emily P. Freeman. She's a best -selling 00:09:45.840 --> 00:09:48.960 author. She's the host of the Next Right Thing 00:09:48.960 --> 00:09:54.200 podcast. And she has a very gentle kind of soulful 00:09:54.200 --> 00:09:58.679 approach to her space. And she focuses on seasons 00:09:58.679 --> 00:10:02.759 of decision -making, change, or overwhelm. She 00:10:02.759 --> 00:10:05.519 draws from her background in spiritual formation 00:10:05.519 --> 00:10:08.519 and creative leadership to guide readers through 00:10:08.519 --> 00:10:12.740 practical yet grace -filled decisions. So her 00:10:12.740 --> 00:10:15.559 mission is basically to help people stop the 00:10:15.559 --> 00:10:19.340 constant striving for clarity and instead develop 00:10:19.340 --> 00:10:22.740 the inner confidence to take the next right step 00:10:22.740 --> 00:10:25.399 peacefully, even when you don't have the full 00:10:25.399 --> 00:10:29.299 picture, which for people like me, I always wanted 00:10:29.299 --> 00:10:31.759 a crystal ball. Just tell me how it happened, 00:10:31.899 --> 00:10:35.580 you know, how it all works out. I've had to let 00:10:35.580 --> 00:10:40.169 go of that mindset, okay? So. The next right 00:10:40.169 --> 00:10:44.450 thing, I kind of pulled like the top five takeaways. 00:10:45.230 --> 00:10:47.330 And number one, I've already mentioned that you 00:10:47.330 --> 00:10:50.090 don't need the full picture to move forward. 00:10:51.730 --> 00:10:54.129 This is the one and only time I've kind of done 00:10:54.129 --> 00:10:56.590 that. Like you don't have to have it all figured 00:10:56.590 --> 00:11:02.049 out, just do the next right thing. So this book 00:11:02.049 --> 00:11:06.600 talks about kind of analysis paralysis, right? 00:11:06.600 --> 00:11:10.399 Where we sort of paralyze ourselves waiting for 00:11:10.399 --> 00:11:13.720 this moment of clarity. And really what we should 00:11:13.720 --> 00:11:16.100 be doing, and this is what I ended up doing, 00:11:16.259 --> 00:11:21.480 is to just take one small step at a time. And 00:11:21.480 --> 00:11:25.740 eventually all of those steps will compound into 00:11:25.740 --> 00:11:29.320 clarity and action. And I've always said on this 00:11:29.320 --> 00:11:32.539 podcast, baby steps. And this is a prime example 00:11:32.539 --> 00:11:36.730 of that. Number two, decision fatigue is real 00:11:36.730 --> 00:11:40.090 and simplifying the process helps. So she talks 00:11:40.090 --> 00:11:43.730 about modern life, how overwhelming it is with 00:11:43.730 --> 00:11:47.389 choices and noise and the antidote for that is 00:11:47.389 --> 00:11:51.429 not more information. Instead, it's stillness 00:11:51.429 --> 00:11:56.830 and reflection and asking better questions, journaling, 00:11:57.250 --> 00:12:00.850 turning inward. I would again mention my free 00:12:00.850 --> 00:12:03.169 identity journal, getting in touch with your 00:12:03.169 --> 00:12:07.110 top three core values, what you want your next 00:12:07.110 --> 00:12:12.649 chapter to look like. OK? Number three. She says 00:12:12.649 --> 00:12:16.769 to make room for soul space, meaning create space 00:12:16.769 --> 00:12:19.649 for your soul to breathe. I know for some of 00:12:19.649 --> 00:12:23.309 you this might sound woo woo, but this is more 00:12:23.309 --> 00:12:27.889 just like stop, take a breath, stop rushing. 00:12:28.289 --> 00:12:32.929 It's not a race. Sit with your thoughts. Listen 00:12:32.929 --> 00:12:38.250 to your intuition. I had many guests talk about 00:12:38.250 --> 00:12:42.070 that. And I would say especially women, we get 00:12:42.070 --> 00:12:45.370 a pull and a pull and oftentimes we have to ignore 00:12:45.370 --> 00:12:48.129 it. It's not the right time or I can't put myself 00:12:48.129 --> 00:12:52.090 first. And again, that's where I think an identity 00:12:52.090 --> 00:12:54.929 journal can really help. Like what is my inner 00:12:54.929 --> 00:12:59.789 voice saying to me? And if I took one step to 00:12:59.789 --> 00:13:02.429 follow it, that's what my journal walks you through. 00:13:02.750 --> 00:13:06.330 What would be one step? And then what would be 00:13:06.330 --> 00:13:10.149 the next baby step? and eventually you're there. 00:13:11.429 --> 00:13:16.129 Number four, naming your desire clarifies direction. 00:13:17.250 --> 00:13:19.490 This is what I talked about all the way back 00:13:19.490 --> 00:13:22.990 to dating when I said I'm never dating again 00:13:22.990 --> 00:13:26.049 and then eventually decided that I would and 00:13:26.049 --> 00:13:28.450 everybody told me make a list, make a list, make 00:13:28.450 --> 00:13:32.679 a list and do not settle. for what's not on that 00:13:32.679 --> 00:13:36.220 list. Again, you have to be okay being alone. 00:13:36.720 --> 00:13:39.759 You have to be okay. Maybe the first step in 00:13:39.759 --> 00:13:43.539 your transition is not your forever step, right? 00:13:43.639 --> 00:13:48.059 But it is one step forward in the direction of 00:13:48.059 --> 00:13:51.379 what you're dreaming or hoping for. So first 00:13:51.379 --> 00:13:54.679 you have to name without judgment, what you want. 00:13:54.960 --> 00:13:58.320 And don't listen to what other people think you 00:13:58.320 --> 00:14:01.480 want or think you should do or think you have. 00:14:01.519 --> 00:14:04.299 I did that for many years and it made me miserable. 00:14:05.059 --> 00:14:08.120 And so my life doesn't have to look like anybody 00:14:08.120 --> 00:14:10.679 else's life. And I think when you get to be my 00:14:10.679 --> 00:14:13.379 age, it's definitely a benefit of your fifties 00:14:13.379 --> 00:14:15.039 and sixties. You don't care what people think 00:14:15.039 --> 00:14:16.840 about your decisions because they're not living 00:14:16.840 --> 00:14:19.700 my life, right? They don't have to wake up every 00:14:19.700 --> 00:14:23.879 day and do what I do. So That brings me to the 00:14:23.879 --> 00:14:27.279 last number five takeaway for this resource and 00:14:27.279 --> 00:14:32.820 that is let peace not fear be your guide. Oh 00:14:32.820 --> 00:14:37.659 boy, decisions made from anxiety and decisions 00:14:37.659 --> 00:14:43.220 made from peace are very different. I made a 00:14:43.220 --> 00:14:47.360 lot of decisions from anxiety that all ended 00:14:47.360 --> 00:14:52.080 up pretty poorly. And until you are comfortable 00:14:52.080 --> 00:14:56.080 and at peace with yourself, it's going to be 00:14:56.080 --> 00:15:01.000 a rocky road. Okay, so you need to choose a path 00:15:01.000 --> 00:15:06.159 that aligns with your truest self, what matters 00:15:06.159 --> 00:15:11.950 to you, your core values. And again. go to Life's 00:15:11.950 --> 00:15:16.429 NextLessonPlan .com slash freebies and my free 00:15:16.429 --> 00:15:21.129 journal walks you through these steps. Okay, 00:15:21.269 --> 00:15:24.789 we're gonna transition to my second resource, 00:15:25.149 --> 00:15:29.110 which is William Bridges' PhD. He was an American 00:15:29.110 --> 00:15:33.799 author, a speaker, and a consultant. best known 00:15:33.799 --> 00:15:37.100 for his work with transitions and the psychological 00:15:37.100 --> 00:15:40.120 process people go through when facing change. 00:15:40.679 --> 00:15:44.419 So he had a groundbreaking book called Transitions, 00:15:44.980 --> 00:15:49.080 Making Sense of Life's Changes that introduced 00:15:49.080 --> 00:15:53.139 the idea that change is external, what people 00:15:53.139 --> 00:15:57.259 see on the outside, but transition is internal, 00:15:57.559 --> 00:16:01.799 all the work you did internally. So he has a 00:16:01.799 --> 00:16:05.940 bridges transition model that a lot of organizations 00:16:05.940 --> 00:16:09.620 have used. It's big in personal development to 00:16:09.620 --> 00:16:12.399 help people move through major life and career 00:16:12.399 --> 00:16:17.340 changes with more awareness and resilience. So 00:16:17.340 --> 00:16:20.779 he has this neutral zone that he talks about, 00:16:21.279 --> 00:16:24.379 which is what I'm referencing today, that it 00:16:24.379 --> 00:16:28.559 might be messy. which is necessary. So this like 00:16:28.559 --> 00:16:31.940 middle phase of a transition, the space between 00:16:31.940 --> 00:16:34.600 an ending and a new beginning, which is what 00:16:34.600 --> 00:16:39.450 I'm in now, it's very uncomfortable. disorienting, 00:16:39.629 --> 00:16:42.090 it's uncertain. I mean, especially before I had 00:16:42.090 --> 00:16:44.509 locked in a job, you know, living in limbo is 00:16:44.509 --> 00:16:47.950 psychologically exhausting. It's exciting because 00:16:47.950 --> 00:16:50.110 again, as long as you're taking steps in the 00:16:50.110 --> 00:16:54.049 right direction and being open -minded, it's 00:16:54.049 --> 00:16:56.710 uncertain but it can still be exciting and this 00:16:56.710 --> 00:16:59.409 is where the real transformation happens. There's 00:16:59.409 --> 00:17:02.169 a little bit of risk and a little bit of messiness. 00:17:03.190 --> 00:17:07.480 But you know, what What good comes from not taking 00:17:07.480 --> 00:17:11.920 a risk? Again, that comfort zone is safe and 00:17:11.920 --> 00:17:17.339 secure, but is it happy? Right? So... This neutral 00:17:17.339 --> 00:17:20.579 zone, a couple of takeaways from that, is this 00:17:20.579 --> 00:17:24.460 idea of limbo. And he actually would argue that 00:17:24.460 --> 00:17:27.200 limbo's not a bad thing. It's actually a crucial 00:17:27.200 --> 00:17:31.140 development stage. So this neutral zone may feel 00:17:31.140 --> 00:17:33.940 like limbo, feel like being stuck, but it's actually 00:17:33.940 --> 00:17:37.160 an essential time of reflection, experimentation, 00:17:37.539 --> 00:17:39.880 and realignment. And now that I look back, I 00:17:39.880 --> 00:17:43.400 definitely see that. Being in this space allows 00:17:43.400 --> 00:17:46.839 for you to detach from who you were. and begin 00:17:46.839 --> 00:17:49.440 imagining who you might become. And this is where 00:17:49.440 --> 00:17:53.299 that identity work comes into play, right? So 00:17:53.299 --> 00:17:57.519 this is time between your old reality and your 00:17:57.519 --> 00:18:03.119 new one. And again, it's okay to mourn and to 00:18:03.119 --> 00:18:07.420 celebrate the old reality. Those feelings are 00:18:07.420 --> 00:18:14.180 normal, okay? Number two, your productivity may 00:18:14.180 --> 00:18:19.579 dip. but your creativity rises. So you may feel 00:18:19.579 --> 00:18:22.980 foggy or less effective during this time, kind 00:18:22.980 --> 00:18:27.599 of scatterbrained. So Bridges would argue that 00:18:27.599 --> 00:18:30.740 the neutral zone is when you get new ideas. Well, 00:18:30.859 --> 00:18:34.339 looky here. I started a podcast during this period. 00:18:34.940 --> 00:18:37.420 For some reason, I had a pull to do something 00:18:37.420 --> 00:18:41.160 out of my comfort zone and very creative. And 00:18:41.160 --> 00:18:44.799 so I went with my imagination, my vision, and 00:18:44.799 --> 00:18:48.420 I followed it. Still no idea where it's going 00:18:48.420 --> 00:18:51.380 to lead me, but the journey, you know, enjoying 00:18:51.380 --> 00:18:53.859 the journey and not the end destination is new 00:18:53.859 --> 00:18:56.799 for me. And I'm definitely enjoying the journey. 00:18:56.819 --> 00:19:01.200 I have no idea when or where or what the end 00:19:01.200 --> 00:19:03.500 destination is. People keep asking me, are you 00:19:03.500 --> 00:19:05.000 going to keep doing your podcast? Are you going 00:19:05.000 --> 00:19:07.079 to keep doing your podcast? And I keep saying, 00:19:07.299 --> 00:19:10.450 I'll do what feels right. Right? If I'm still 00:19:10.450 --> 00:19:13.210 enjoying it, if I still have time for it, yes. 00:19:13.890 --> 00:19:16.710 If not, then I'll make a decision that's right 00:19:16.710 --> 00:19:21.390 for me. And you should do the same. Resisting 00:19:21.390 --> 00:19:24.750 this sort of neutral zone delays your growth. 00:19:24.849 --> 00:19:29.190 So again, rushing this part to skip to get to 00:19:29.190 --> 00:19:31.569 the good part, which is something that I tend 00:19:31.569 --> 00:19:35.430 to want to do, can backfire. This impulsivity, 00:19:35.490 --> 00:19:39.109 right? And trying to resist the discomfort. can 00:19:39.109 --> 00:19:41.710 lead to burnout, poor decisions, and needing 00:19:41.710 --> 00:19:46.670 to repeat the cycle again. So take your time. 00:19:46.930 --> 00:19:49.750 Do it right the first time, right? We're a rush, 00:19:49.789 --> 00:19:54.710 rush, hustle culture, and I really did do this 00:19:54.710 --> 00:19:57.549 because I believed that it would pay off, and 00:19:57.549 --> 00:20:01.829 it did. Number four, rituals and reflection help 00:20:01.829 --> 00:20:05.569 you navigate. So as I've already said, this is 00:20:05.569 --> 00:20:11.970 a great time to journal, Sit with yourself and 00:20:11.970 --> 00:20:15.329 your feelings and thoughts. Have conversations 00:20:15.329 --> 00:20:18.910 with mentors who you think have good advice and 00:20:18.910 --> 00:20:22.130 who can guide you. Huh, that's part of what I've 00:20:22.130 --> 00:20:26.809 done with my guests here, right? It forced me 00:20:26.809 --> 00:20:29.509 to have these conversations. I always, one of 00:20:29.509 --> 00:20:33.609 my favorite books is A Curious Mind, where, you 00:20:33.609 --> 00:20:36.710 know, Brian Grazer, the film producer, had a 00:20:36.710 --> 00:20:39.609 list of people that he wanted to have curiosity 00:20:39.609 --> 00:20:43.250 conversations with. That's what I'm doing. How 00:20:43.250 --> 00:20:46.230 fun is that? To say, I want to talk to this person, 00:20:46.269 --> 00:20:48.569 and I think the world should hear their message. 00:20:48.869 --> 00:20:52.750 And it could be helpful to someone. So I've brought 00:20:52.750 --> 00:20:57.369 some people to you, but also I've tried to seek 00:20:57.369 --> 00:21:02.400 out people who could help me. say goodbye to 00:21:02.400 --> 00:21:06.319 my previous identity and open their arms to what 00:21:06.319 --> 00:21:09.039 might come next and who might understand it and 00:21:09.039 --> 00:21:12.279 help with the transition. So hopefully you have 00:21:12.279 --> 00:21:15.079 found some of those guests helpful in that realm 00:21:15.079 --> 00:21:20.160 as well. And then lastly, clarity comes after 00:21:20.160 --> 00:21:25.880 the confusion. So you have to sit with that aimless 00:21:25.880 --> 00:21:29.880 feeling for a while, okay? If you stay in it 00:21:29.880 --> 00:21:33.640 and you see it through, you will eventually emerge 00:21:33.640 --> 00:21:38.859 to clarity. Not being forced, but naturally when 00:21:38.859 --> 00:21:42.480 the time is right. Easier said than done. Totally 00:21:42.480 --> 00:21:46.319 get it. Lots of whining on my part of like, can 00:21:46.319 --> 00:21:49.720 it just be wrapped up already? It took four months, 00:21:50.359 --> 00:21:55.539 right, of unknown and even longer before that. 00:21:55.759 --> 00:21:58.799 before my job conversation started. You know, 00:21:58.799 --> 00:22:03.119 I was interviewing for years with nothing. So 00:22:03.119 --> 00:22:06.519 this is the time again for you to recognize your 00:22:06.519 --> 00:22:09.740 values, your passions, and how you want to shape 00:22:09.740 --> 00:22:15.440 your future. So don't fear the fog. Get comfortable 00:22:15.440 --> 00:22:19.500 with being uncomfortable. That's where transformation 00:22:19.500 --> 00:22:23.680 happens, okay? So we're going to take a little 00:22:23.680 --> 00:22:28.839 break here before I move into my last two resources 00:22:28.839 --> 00:22:35.660 and my takeaways for today. 100 % of men and 00:22:35.660 --> 00:22:38.740 women have hormones. And with the increased presence 00:22:38.740 --> 00:22:41.440 of processed foods and environmental toxins, 00:22:41.980 --> 00:22:43.759 it's more important than ever to make mindful 00:22:43.759 --> 00:22:47.039 choices in the products we use every day. That's 00:22:47.039 --> 00:22:50.289 why I trust Q and Grace. high -performing clean 00:22:50.289 --> 00:22:53.690 products designed to support hormone health while 00:22:53.690 --> 00:22:57.269 reducing exposure to harmful chemicals. Because 00:22:57.269 --> 00:23:00.829 this topic has been my primary focus since ending 00:23:00.829 --> 00:23:04.250 birth control in 2024 in an attempt to regulate 00:23:04.250 --> 00:23:07.509 my changing midlife hormones, after making healthy 00:23:07.509 --> 00:23:11.009 swaps in my diet, personal care products, and 00:23:11.009 --> 00:23:13.789 exercise routine, I've been able to lower my 00:23:13.789 --> 00:23:16.930 dose of anxiety medication I once relied very 00:23:16.930 --> 00:23:20.059 heavily on. and have restored balance to my nervous 00:23:20.059 --> 00:23:23.339 system and cleared up the brain fog I was experiencing 00:23:23.339 --> 00:23:26.660 in perimenopause. Hugh and Grace has played a 00:23:26.660 --> 00:23:29.920 key role in this transformation, offering safe, 00:23:30.220 --> 00:23:33.160 effective, non -toxic solutions that support 00:23:33.160 --> 00:23:36.450 my wellness journey. If you listened to episode 00:23:36.450 --> 00:23:39.890 16 with certified Mayo Clinic health and wellness 00:23:39.890 --> 00:23:42.769 coach Tracy Danielson Mitchell, you heard our 00:23:42.769 --> 00:23:44.829 talk about the importance of hormone health. 00:23:45.509 --> 00:23:47.869 To share with you everything I did throughout 00:23:47.869 --> 00:23:50.589 my journey to balance my hormones, I did a deep 00:23:50.589 --> 00:23:53.809 dive on my Live and Learn Patreon about all of 00:23:53.809 --> 00:23:58.670 the tests and supplements that I use in order 00:23:58.670 --> 00:24:03.720 to navigate this journey in my 50s. To find this 00:24:03.720 --> 00:24:07.400 episode, you can just visit patreon .com slash 00:24:07.400 --> 00:24:10.640 live and learn. Some of my favorite products 00:24:10.640 --> 00:24:13.579 I use every day include Hue and Grace's hydrate 00:24:13.579 --> 00:24:17.160 and detox that contains powerful antioxidants, 00:24:17.660 --> 00:24:21.460 electrolytes, and prebiotic fiber. Their popular 00:24:21.460 --> 00:24:24.000 blue drink you see me drinking on Instagram is 00:24:24.000 --> 00:24:26.859 their triple boost hormone support protein powder 00:24:26.859 --> 00:24:30.200 with blue spirulina that I mix with their daily 00:24:30.200 --> 00:24:33.930 collagen supplement. I also keep my skin hydrated 00:24:33.930 --> 00:24:37.809 and smooth with their spray -on body oil. I love 00:24:37.809 --> 00:24:40.390 putting this on before going out and it gives 00:24:40.390 --> 00:24:44.509 my aging skin a more dewy look. I've also switched 00:24:44.509 --> 00:24:46.990 out my hair care products to Hue and Grace's 00:24:46.990 --> 00:24:50.529 Your Best Hair Day line with all natural ingredients 00:24:50.529 --> 00:24:53.509 that help nourish my hair and stretch out time 00:24:53.509 --> 00:24:56.920 between washes. If you're on this journey with 00:24:56.920 --> 00:24:59.740 me and are interested in exploring Hue and Grace's 00:24:59.740 --> 00:25:03.480 trusted non -toxic products for 10 % off and 00:25:03.480 --> 00:25:06.779 free shipping, you can use my discount link at 00:25:06.779 --> 00:25:10.380 hueandgrace .com slash lesson plan and reach 00:25:10.380 --> 00:25:14.519 out anytime via email at nextlessonplan at gmail 00:25:14.519 --> 00:25:18.640 .com with questions. Live and learn with me as 00:25:18.640 --> 00:25:21.920 we focus on living fully and feeling our best. 00:25:22.220 --> 00:25:26.990 Visit hueandgrace .com to see how easy it is 00:25:26.990 --> 00:25:30.109 to start making some healthy swaps on your way 00:25:30.109 --> 00:25:36.750 to non -toxic living. It is time for Ask the 00:25:36.750 --> 00:25:39.930 Teacher Anything, and today's first question 00:25:39.930 --> 00:25:43.549 is, how am I building community in this new phase 00:25:43.549 --> 00:25:46.539 of life? Such a good question. I talked about 00:25:46.539 --> 00:25:50.279 this a lot in the identity episode of, you know, 00:25:50.400 --> 00:25:52.799 when parts of your identity fall away seem kind 00:25:52.799 --> 00:25:55.599 of lost and you need to surround yourself with 00:25:55.599 --> 00:25:59.380 maybe new people who fit the new version of you 00:25:59.380 --> 00:26:05.400 better. And so I joined an all -female bike group. 00:26:06.009 --> 00:26:09.349 But it also is kind of a social group. So I just 00:26:09.349 --> 00:26:11.670 started went to the first meeting We actually 00:26:11.670 --> 00:26:14.630 had a cooking class together, which was super 00:26:14.630 --> 00:26:20.230 fun There's a bunch of bike rides and trips planned 00:26:20.230 --> 00:26:26.069 as well as other outings and yoga So really enjoying 00:26:26.069 --> 00:26:31.109 that so far What I love, and this is how I set 00:26:31.109 --> 00:26:33.930 up my Instagram too, is that anybody that I'm 00:26:33.930 --> 00:26:36.430 following is someone that I would like to aspire 00:26:36.430 --> 00:26:41.690 to be more like. And these women, such butt kickers 00:26:41.690 --> 00:26:44.150 and such great people, like they're energetic. 00:26:45.019 --> 00:26:47.940 They're healthy, they're fun, they're vibrant. 00:26:48.099 --> 00:26:51.000 Some of them are current teachers, retired teachers, 00:26:51.200 --> 00:26:54.279 lawyers. I mean, you name it, but their number 00:26:54.279 --> 00:26:57.119 one value or one of their top three values is 00:26:57.119 --> 00:27:02.019 health and vibrancy and being active. And that 00:27:02.019 --> 00:27:05.859 aligns with my values. So that is one of the 00:27:05.859 --> 00:27:10.700 things that I've done. I'm also trying to, again, 00:27:11.339 --> 00:27:13.880 you know, When you're busy with teaching and 00:27:13.880 --> 00:27:16.119 you're so exhausted, you know, always say, I 00:27:16.119 --> 00:27:18.000 wish I had more time for this or I wish I had 00:27:18.000 --> 00:27:21.200 more time to see these people. And so I've tried 00:27:21.200 --> 00:27:24.420 to reach out more and make a point. I typically 00:27:24.420 --> 00:27:26.900 am the type of person who like waits for someone 00:27:26.900 --> 00:27:30.940 to contact me. But I've told myself that if it's 00:27:30.940 --> 00:27:34.039 important to me, then I will reach out. And that 00:27:34.039 --> 00:27:37.599 is hard for me, I'm going to admit. But I've 00:27:37.599 --> 00:27:41.210 been doing more of that. And so just again, trying 00:27:41.210 --> 00:27:45.049 to put myself in situations, you know, you are 00:27:45.049 --> 00:27:48.569 who you surround yourself with. And so trying 00:27:48.569 --> 00:27:53.750 to find community and people who align with my 00:27:53.750 --> 00:27:56.789 core values. Great question. Love that question. 00:27:57.690 --> 00:28:00.490 Second question, how do I balance honoring my 00:28:00.490 --> 00:28:06.470 past with embracing my future? Oh, this has been... 00:28:07.720 --> 00:28:09.920 I'm gonna be honest, when I'm recording this, 00:28:10.099 --> 00:28:13.920 I have 20 days to go in teaching. And when it 00:28:13.920 --> 00:28:17.720 airs, it'll be even probably half that. It has 00:28:17.720 --> 00:28:21.299 been really hard having made this decision over 00:28:21.299 --> 00:28:27.000 100 school days ago and sticking with it because 00:28:27.000 --> 00:28:31.369 I probably stayed a year too long. So I have 00:28:31.369 --> 00:28:34.849 to continually remind myself to stay positive, 00:28:35.529 --> 00:28:38.990 to focus on the positives. I have really nice 00:28:38.990 --> 00:28:44.410 classes here at the end. They have done some 00:28:44.410 --> 00:28:46.809 really incredible work, some of the best work 00:28:46.809 --> 00:28:49.829 of my career, really trying to focus on that, 00:28:50.269 --> 00:28:52.970 really trying to focus on, you know, the parts 00:28:52.970 --> 00:28:55.769 of my legacy that I've shared with you, these 00:28:55.769 --> 00:29:00.329 guests who I taught in my classroom or educators 00:29:00.329 --> 00:29:02.990 and professionals who I've connected with because 00:29:02.990 --> 00:29:06.529 of my long teaching career. And I'm proud of 00:29:06.529 --> 00:29:09.069 my career. I'm not so proud of, you know, how 00:29:09.069 --> 00:29:12.450 I've felt the last few years, but I've done my 00:29:12.450 --> 00:29:16.390 best and tried to stick it out. And overall, 00:29:16.930 --> 00:29:20.829 wow, I had such an amazing career. I worked with 00:29:20.829 --> 00:29:23.230 such brilliant people, and that is going to be 00:29:23.230 --> 00:29:28.880 really, really hard. But I also know Oh my gosh, 00:29:28.940 --> 00:29:31.680 I'm going to have some of the best bosses. It's 00:29:31.680 --> 00:29:34.220 funny because some of the teachers that I currently 00:29:34.220 --> 00:29:37.519 teach English with were actually classmates of 00:29:37.519 --> 00:29:40.319 my bosses. And they're like, that's gonna be 00:29:40.319 --> 00:29:43.539 your boss? Oh my gosh, like, you're so lucky. 00:29:44.519 --> 00:29:47.160 So, you know, who knows? I, you know, I don't 00:29:47.160 --> 00:29:49.140 know what the next chapter is gonna bring. I 00:29:49.140 --> 00:29:51.559 don't know if it ends up being, you know, my 00:29:51.559 --> 00:29:55.089 forever until retirement. I'm not sure. I'm just 00:29:55.089 --> 00:29:58.990 so excited and happy that I found something that 00:29:58.990 --> 00:30:01.329 met my list, right? These are the things that 00:30:01.329 --> 00:30:07.029 I want to have. And they met that. And all you 00:30:07.029 --> 00:30:09.849 can do is keep taking those baby steps forward. 00:30:11.880 --> 00:30:14.579 Thank you so much. I love these questions. I 00:30:14.579 --> 00:30:17.460 hope you continue to enjoy them. Please send 00:30:17.460 --> 00:30:20.240 more to me on Instagram at Life's Next Lesson 00:30:20.240 --> 00:30:23.039 Plan or on my website. There's a question box 00:30:23.039 --> 00:30:27.680 at Life'sNextLessonPlan .com. So with that, we're 00:30:27.680 --> 00:30:31.299 going to continue on with my last two resources. 00:30:31.380 --> 00:30:34.799 I'm going to leave my favorite one for last and 00:30:34.799 --> 00:30:37.099 then give you some action steps and takeaways 00:30:37.099 --> 00:30:42.700 for today. So, our next person is Bruce Feiler, 00:30:42.880 --> 00:30:45.700 who is a bestselling author, speaker, and journalist 00:30:45.700 --> 00:30:49.299 known for exploring themes of meaning, family, 00:30:49.599 --> 00:30:52.960 and navigating change. He has a book called Life 00:30:52.960 --> 00:30:56.500 is in the Transitions, Mastering Change at Any 00:30:56.500 --> 00:31:01.640 Age, and he draws from over 225 in -depth life 00:31:01.640 --> 00:31:05.480 story interviews to create a modern guide for 00:31:05.480 --> 00:31:09.160 navigating personal upheaval. His work is deeply 00:31:09.160 --> 00:31:12.119 human, research -backed, and full of empathy 00:31:12.119 --> 00:31:15.700 for the messiness of life. So I really like that. 00:31:16.140 --> 00:31:19.279 He also has this term that he's created called 00:31:19.279 --> 00:31:23.460 Life Quake. which is a sudden, dramatic, and 00:31:23.460 --> 00:31:26.339 often unexpected disruption. So this is something 00:31:26.339 --> 00:31:29.240 you don't plan for, like a divorce, a job loss, 00:31:29.420 --> 00:31:32.980 an illness, an identity crisis that really shakes 00:31:32.980 --> 00:31:37.339 your foundation. And these sometimes are inevitable, 00:31:37.660 --> 00:31:40.900 right? Like you're going to have maybe one or 00:31:40.900 --> 00:31:45.490 probably more life quake. occur and so life is 00:31:45.490 --> 00:31:48.230 not linear it's full of twists and turns and 00:31:48.230 --> 00:31:52.190 these life quakes and So the key isn't necessarily 00:31:52.190 --> 00:31:55.710 avoiding them. It's just being prepared to navigate 00:31:55.710 --> 00:32:00.410 them when and if they happen Okay, so top five 00:32:00.410 --> 00:32:03.970 takeaways from life is in the transitions number 00:32:03.970 --> 00:32:09.549 one disruption is normal not a detour so in these 00:32:09.549 --> 00:32:12.960 interviews and stories Filer found that people 00:32:12.960 --> 00:32:16.079 experience a major life quake on average about 00:32:16.079 --> 00:32:19.700 every 12 to 18 months. Certainly my life feels 00:32:19.700 --> 00:32:24.240 like that. And a truly disruptive big one, three 00:32:24.240 --> 00:32:28.099 to five times in life. And I can identify with 00:32:28.099 --> 00:32:32.680 that. You know, every life quake has a transition 00:32:32.680 --> 00:32:36.099 attached. As hard as these things are, and I 00:32:36.099 --> 00:32:39.299 will attest to the fact that, whew, you don't 00:32:39.299 --> 00:32:42.279 know sometimes if you're gonna make it out, definitely 00:32:42.279 --> 00:32:45.319 stronger when you come out on the other side 00:32:45.319 --> 00:32:48.940 and certainly more knowledgeable. So although 00:32:48.940 --> 00:32:51.220 you may not have control of this happening to 00:32:51.220 --> 00:32:53.599 you, you certainly have control of how you move 00:32:53.599 --> 00:32:57.220 through it, right? So... I think he's going to 00:32:57.220 --> 00:32:59.579 echo a lot of the things you've already heard 00:32:59.579 --> 00:33:01.660 that there's a grieving, right, and a letting 00:33:01.660 --> 00:33:04.240 go of what was. There's, you know, these three 00:33:04.240 --> 00:33:07.059 stages. There's the messy middle, this uncertainty 00:33:07.059 --> 00:33:11.640 and experimentation and maybe limbo. And then 00:33:11.640 --> 00:33:13.900 there's the new beginning and it's an integration 00:33:13.900 --> 00:33:17.200 and a reinvention and that can be messy too. 00:33:17.799 --> 00:33:20.759 And so just giving yourself grace and understanding 00:33:20.759 --> 00:33:23.720 where you are in the process can bring calm. 00:33:23.900 --> 00:33:27.940 and clarity. Okay and then reframing your own 00:33:27.940 --> 00:33:31.819 story to make meaning out of chaos is one of 00:33:31.819 --> 00:33:35.660 his suggestions too. And so telling your own 00:33:35.660 --> 00:33:40.180 story can help you heal and actually make you 00:33:40.180 --> 00:33:43.980 feel less alone. So people ask me a lot, you 00:33:43.980 --> 00:33:46.099 know, how can you be so vulnerable on your podcast? 00:33:46.599 --> 00:33:50.380 And it actually does make you feel less alone 00:33:50.380 --> 00:33:54.220 because people do reach out and share their own 00:33:54.220 --> 00:33:57.160 stories or again become vulnerable with you based 00:33:57.160 --> 00:33:59.900 on things they're going through because you have 00:33:59.900 --> 00:34:03.640 had the courage to share it. And I think that 00:34:03.640 --> 00:34:07.549 is what is important. So I kind of rushed through 00:34:07.549 --> 00:34:10.969 his takeaways pretty quickly, but I want to get 00:34:10.969 --> 00:34:14.030 to the last one, my favorite one. So I think, 00:34:14.190 --> 00:34:17.030 you know, again, if you love real life stories 00:34:17.030 --> 00:34:19.769 like I do, you know, more of that journalistic 00:34:19.769 --> 00:34:23.550 real life nonfiction, I think this book would 00:34:23.550 --> 00:34:26.750 be really cool of hearing real people's stories 00:34:26.750 --> 00:34:30.389 and reminders that, you know, this is part of 00:34:30.389 --> 00:34:33.809 life and you can't avoid it, but you can learn 00:34:33.809 --> 00:34:40.429 from it. Okay. Favorite for last is Glennon Doyle 00:34:40.429 --> 00:34:44.690 and oh my god her book Untamed was life -changing 00:34:44.690 --> 00:34:47.409 for me and she has a podcast with her wife and 00:34:47.409 --> 00:34:49.829 her sister and now a brand new book that's just 00:34:49.829 --> 00:34:53.449 sitting here waiting for me called We Can Do 00:34:53.449 --> 00:34:57.030 Hard Things same title as their podcast and I'm 00:34:57.030 --> 00:34:59.469 trying to finish an academic book first before 00:34:59.469 --> 00:35:02.809 I dig into it but Rest assured, I'll probably 00:35:02.809 --> 00:35:05.210 have another podcast about that book itself, 00:35:05.329 --> 00:35:08.070 because I'm sure it's packed with great takeaways. 00:35:09.070 --> 00:35:11.510 But this, We Can Do Hard Things, everybody has 00:35:11.510 --> 00:35:14.429 heard this. This is like Glennon Doyle's rallying 00:35:14.429 --> 00:35:21.989 cry for her followers. so real and has been so 00:35:21.989 --> 00:35:24.250 vulnerable. And I think that's what has inspired 00:35:24.250 --> 00:35:26.670 me and why I like her and why so many people 00:35:26.670 --> 00:35:30.949 gravitate to her. And she prides herself on being 00:35:30.949 --> 00:35:34.750 messy and having fear and anxiety and not having 00:35:34.750 --> 00:35:38.309 it all figured out, but sharing the messy steps 00:35:38.309 --> 00:35:41.230 of it and facing the fear with truth and love. 00:35:42.429 --> 00:35:45.050 And one of her quotes that I love from Untamed 00:35:45.050 --> 00:35:48.329 is that, You know, being human is not about feeling 00:35:48.329 --> 00:35:52.590 happy. It's about feeling everything, of course, 00:35:52.730 --> 00:35:56.489 right? We all have feelings and we feel deeply, 00:35:56.829 --> 00:36:01.150 which she does. So I think the top five takeaways, 00:36:01.269 --> 00:36:04.889 if you can boil her wisdom down to five, her 00:36:04.889 --> 00:36:08.010 philosophy number one, clarity comes through 00:36:08.010 --> 00:36:11.590 action. not overthinking, and this is what we've 00:36:11.590 --> 00:36:14.590 talked about before, is that just waiting and 00:36:14.590 --> 00:36:18.289 waiting for clarity or reacting too quickly can 00:36:18.289 --> 00:36:22.210 backfire. And so you have to take small brave 00:36:22.210 --> 00:36:25.230 actions that align with your inner knowing. and 00:36:25.230 --> 00:36:27.550 she always uses this phrase your inner knowing 00:36:27.550 --> 00:36:31.769 your intuition right your core values yes yes 00:36:31.769 --> 00:36:35.570 yes yes yes she also has a journal an untamed 00:36:35.570 --> 00:36:39.269 journal that corresponds with her book untamed 00:36:39.269 --> 00:36:43.010 and i would highly recommend that as well number 00:36:43.010 --> 00:36:46.929 two takeaway pain is a signal not a problem i 00:36:46.929 --> 00:36:51.989 mean we all feel pain right and A lot of us avoid 00:36:51.989 --> 00:36:54.610 it, try to avoid it and see it as an enemy, but 00:36:54.610 --> 00:36:58.449 it can also be bad. There's my dog. He feels 00:36:58.449 --> 00:37:01.789 strongly also. Emotional discomfort isn't something 00:37:01.789 --> 00:37:05.510 to avoid. It's a signal for change or growth 00:37:05.510 --> 00:37:09.190 or deeper honesty with ourselves. So if you are 00:37:09.190 --> 00:37:11.789 uncomfortable, you're in pain, you're angry, 00:37:11.949 --> 00:37:14.329 you're confused, you're hurt, you don't have 00:37:14.329 --> 00:37:19.610 a problem. You have life, right? Finding mentors, 00:37:19.989 --> 00:37:22.369 finding professionals, finding a way through 00:37:22.369 --> 00:37:26.650 it, knowing that it's temporary. And I know for 00:37:26.650 --> 00:37:29.329 a fact from experience when you're in it, you're 00:37:29.329 --> 00:37:32.469 like, it doesn't feel temporary. And again, where's 00:37:32.469 --> 00:37:34.670 the crystal ball that shows me that I will get 00:37:34.670 --> 00:37:38.409 out of this, but it is, and there is a way out. 00:37:38.510 --> 00:37:44.119 And there is always a way to seek better. And 00:37:44.119 --> 00:37:47.960 her third takeaway is you can honor yourself 00:37:47.960 --> 00:37:52.519 without abandoning others. So she talks a lot 00:37:52.519 --> 00:37:56.079 about self -trust and that being sacred, but 00:37:56.079 --> 00:38:01.820 you can honor your truth even if it disrupts 00:38:01.820 --> 00:38:06.659 others' expectations. So I've talked a lot about 00:38:06.659 --> 00:38:11.019 like society's messages and just like being true 00:38:11.019 --> 00:38:14.579 to yourself. Don't worry what other people say, 00:38:14.619 --> 00:38:18.360 you know, being brave is not selfish. It means 00:38:18.360 --> 00:38:21.400 that you are trying to live an aligned life. 00:38:22.039 --> 00:38:25.179 And so again, this comes with who you surround 00:38:25.179 --> 00:38:27.739 yourself with and the messages that you allow 00:38:27.739 --> 00:38:31.320 into your life. This goes along with all my conversations 00:38:31.320 --> 00:38:34.800 about boundaries and surrounding yourself with 00:38:34.800 --> 00:38:37.579 people who lift you up and people who you want 00:38:37.579 --> 00:38:42.579 to be more like as much as possible. Number four 00:38:42.579 --> 00:38:45.619 takeaway is staying true to yourself could cost 00:38:45.619 --> 00:38:49.280 you, but so will abandoning yourself. So this 00:38:49.280 --> 00:38:51.880 kind of goes hand in hand with what we were just 00:38:51.880 --> 00:38:55.179 talking about, but both paths cost something. 00:38:55.380 --> 00:38:57.340 You know, a lot of people say like, choose your 00:38:57.340 --> 00:39:00.679 hard. So what's harder? You know, what are you 00:39:00.679 --> 00:39:03.380 willing to give up your piece or your performance? 00:39:04.119 --> 00:39:07.699 So, you know, I had to go through this definitely 00:39:07.699 --> 00:39:12.250 when I was making my decision, like financially 00:39:12.250 --> 00:39:16.730 was probably the the biggest difficulty and like 00:39:16.730 --> 00:39:20.869 money can bring you stability but not happiness 00:39:20.869 --> 00:39:23.929 and there's even research that shows that after 00:39:23.929 --> 00:39:26.610 a certain salary point I think it's a hundred 00:39:26.610 --> 00:39:31.070 thousand dollars any money above that does not 00:39:31.070 --> 00:39:34.349 bring added happiness and in fact if I look at 00:39:34.349 --> 00:39:37.190 my own habits I know that sometimes when I have 00:39:37.190 --> 00:39:41.110 less money I'm smarter about money. That's probably 00:39:41.110 --> 00:39:43.750 a good lesson for me if I'm being honest. But 00:39:43.750 --> 00:39:47.690 this just is like one of her hard -hitting, I 00:39:47.690 --> 00:39:50.769 think, gut punchers. It's like, you know, are 00:39:50.769 --> 00:39:54.150 you going to give up what's important to you 00:39:54.150 --> 00:39:56.710 and what makes you happy just because of what 00:39:56.710 --> 00:40:01.210 someone else thinks or said? And that's harder, 00:40:01.230 --> 00:40:03.489 I think, when you're younger and easier when 00:40:03.489 --> 00:40:08.170 you're older. But it leads into her last takeaway. 00:40:08.519 --> 00:40:11.559 which is you're allowed to change your mind and 00:40:11.559 --> 00:40:14.739 your life. Like, you know, it's funny because 00:40:14.739 --> 00:40:17.960 I think especially teaching, you know, teachers 00:40:17.960 --> 00:40:20.920 a lot of times are lifers. They stay in that 00:40:20.920 --> 00:40:24.599 career or in education for their entire lives. 00:40:25.179 --> 00:40:28.219 And there's almost like a, I don't want to say 00:40:28.219 --> 00:40:31.519 a pressure, but it's just like how it's been, 00:40:31.860 --> 00:40:35.070 right? And I don't know, you know, there's this 00:40:35.070 --> 00:40:37.110 big like, well, I've got to use the degree that 00:40:37.110 --> 00:40:41.010 I paid for. Okay, well, I worked 29 years, I 00:40:41.010 --> 00:40:44.530 invested my money, I, you know, built up a pension 00:40:44.530 --> 00:40:47.929 in Social Security. And yeah, I'm walking away 00:40:47.929 --> 00:40:51.750 short of that. But I'm not done working, right? 00:40:51.750 --> 00:40:54.030 And it's going to look different. And I'm not 00:40:54.030 --> 00:40:56.449 going to be in the Wisconsin retirement system 00:40:56.449 --> 00:41:01.469 anymore. But I've evolved. And hardly anybody 00:41:01.469 --> 00:41:05.389 anymore stays in the same career for three decades, 00:41:05.389 --> 00:41:07.550 right? I think there's a statistic that people 00:41:07.550 --> 00:41:11.489 change jobs like every three to five years or 00:41:11.489 --> 00:41:14.489 something crazy like that. So you're not who 00:41:14.489 --> 00:41:19.130 you were five years ago. Oh my gosh, myself five 00:41:19.130 --> 00:41:23.690 years ago, I was going through a pandemic and 00:41:23.690 --> 00:41:27.909 a divorce with a middle schooler. It's crazy, 00:41:28.210 --> 00:41:30.869 you know, how I have evolved in five years. It's 00:41:30.869 --> 00:41:36.329 been a huge evolution for me. And so who you 00:41:36.329 --> 00:41:38.849 were five years from now shouldn't be informing 00:41:38.849 --> 00:41:43.170 or defining who you have to be now. And I think 00:41:43.170 --> 00:41:46.869 sometimes people, I don't know, our society gives 00:41:46.869 --> 00:41:48.849 us a message like, well, if you're constantly 00:41:49.570 --> 00:41:52.530 changing, you know, you're flaky or you're unsettled 00:41:52.530 --> 00:41:54.949 or you're impulsive. And I'm not saying change 00:41:54.949 --> 00:41:58.289 jobs every three months, right? But like, it's 00:41:58.289 --> 00:42:02.489 okay to grow and change and evolve and, you know, 00:42:02.849 --> 00:42:06.210 take steps in a different direction that feel 00:42:06.460 --> 00:42:11.539 more aligned to yourself. So Glennon Doyle overall, 00:42:11.880 --> 00:42:16.719 her messaging is, you know, has been such a lifeline 00:42:16.719 --> 00:42:20.639 to me in many stages of my life. You don't need 00:42:20.639 --> 00:42:25.000 to be certain or fearless. You need to be truthful, 00:42:25.780 --> 00:42:29.199 trust your inner voice, and go one step at a 00:42:29.199 --> 00:42:32.260 time, even if it's hard, right? Because her motto 00:42:32.260 --> 00:42:37.010 is we can do hard things. And so I highly recommend 00:42:37.010 --> 00:42:40.190 her book Untamed and the journal to go with it. 00:42:40.429 --> 00:42:43.130 And again, I had pre -ordered her We Can Do Hard 00:42:43.130 --> 00:42:45.730 Things. I know it's going to be amazing. I've 00:42:45.730 --> 00:42:47.869 listened to her podcast with her wife and her 00:42:47.869 --> 00:42:50.929 sister, and they're all super brilliant, all 00:42:50.929 --> 00:42:55.210 offering different perspectives. So I'm so excited 00:42:55.210 --> 00:43:00.579 to dig into that as well. So let's get into our 00:43:00.579 --> 00:43:03.880 kind of reflection and then action steps here. 00:43:03.900 --> 00:43:07.420 So a couple questions for you. What if you stop 00:43:07.420 --> 00:43:11.199 trying to figure it out and instead just listen 00:43:11.199 --> 00:43:15.179 to what's tugging at your heart? Okay, think 00:43:15.179 --> 00:43:18.579 about that for a minute. I had this in my identity 00:43:18.579 --> 00:43:22.639 journal as well. What's the smallest next step 00:43:22.639 --> 00:43:26.039 you could take today, even if nothing comes of 00:43:26.039 --> 00:43:30.199 it for years? Okay, it would just be a small 00:43:30.199 --> 00:43:34.099 step and I want you to do a little visualization 00:43:34.099 --> 00:43:38.980 as well. So if it's one year from now and you're 00:43:38.980 --> 00:43:41.760 thriving and you're so happy and you're living 00:43:41.760 --> 00:43:47.619 aligned, what do you wish you'd started today? 00:43:48.659 --> 00:43:52.059 And that can go along with that first step. And 00:43:52.059 --> 00:43:56.099 I'm going to give one last plug for my free identity 00:43:56.099 --> 00:43:58.880 journal. And again, there are many journals out 00:43:58.880 --> 00:44:01.980 there. This one's short and free to get you started. 00:44:03.099 --> 00:44:06.280 Highly recommend Glennon Doyle's Untamed Journal 00:44:06.280 --> 00:44:10.500 as well, or any ritual of small daily reflection 00:44:10.500 --> 00:44:18.610 during a chapter of unknown. I hope you enjoyed 00:44:18.610 --> 00:44:23.210 all of this information. And, you know, to recap, 00:44:23.949 --> 00:44:28.050 not knowing what's next isn't a failure. It's 00:44:28.050 --> 00:44:31.010 a beginning and it's an opportunity. And yes, 00:44:31.010 --> 00:44:33.769 I know it's scary, but it can also be exciting. 00:44:34.269 --> 00:44:37.730 Okay, so you are in the stage of becoming, right? 00:44:38.309 --> 00:44:41.269 Becoming a new version of yourself if you wish 00:44:41.269 --> 00:44:46.909 to do so. I would love, love, love to hear. about 00:44:46.909 --> 00:44:50.269 your decisions and next steps that you're taking. 00:44:51.030 --> 00:44:53.710 So as always, you can reach out to me on Life's 00:44:53.710 --> 00:44:56.889 Next Lesson Plan on Instagram or Facebook. I 00:44:56.889 --> 00:45:00.869 would love for you to dig into either my journal 00:45:00.869 --> 00:45:04.929 or the Glennon Doyle Journal and hear how you're 00:45:04.929 --> 00:45:08.539 liking it or what you've discovered. And I'd 00:45:08.539 --> 00:45:12.579 really like you to just ask yourself what's one 00:45:12.579 --> 00:45:16.400 thing you're letting go of, and one small thing 00:45:16.400 --> 00:45:20.400 you're stepping into, or you would like to step 00:45:20.400 --> 00:45:24.780 into, okay? You can find more of my shenanigans 00:45:24.780 --> 00:45:27.860 on my YouTube channel, Life's Next Lesson Plan, 00:45:28.019 --> 00:45:32.730 where I count down my last final days. and some 00:45:32.730 --> 00:45:36.690 camping adventures, as well as empty nest life 00:45:36.690 --> 00:45:42.269 and all good stuff like that, as well as my website. 00:45:42.429 --> 00:45:45.750 There's additional freebies there. Life's next 00:45:45.750 --> 00:45:49.289 lesson plan dot com would love to hear from you. 00:45:49.530 --> 00:45:52.429 Would love to see rates and reviews on the podcast 00:45:52.429 --> 00:45:56.530 if you have enjoyed it until next time. Stay 00:45:56.530 --> 00:46:01.260 brave, stay curious and remember. Life's next 00:46:01.260 --> 00:46:03.480 lesson plan doesn't come with an answer key, 00:46:04.340 --> 00:46:07.619 but always begins with showing up. See you next 00:46:07.619 --> 00:46:07.880 time.