WEBVTT

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Welcome back everybody to itty bitty niche. Hello,

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welcome back. I'm Laurel and I'm Abby and this

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is a bit niche. Today we're going to run through

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a couple more of our just random little thoughts

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Yeah, and we're gonna actually make it a couple

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this time Yeah instead of a full episode because

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last time it was supposed to be a mini so and

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I think it was over an hour Yeah, and our producer

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gave us some feedback which we famously listen

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to religiously. Yes You want to go first? Yes,

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speaking of religious. Oh, perfect. A perfect

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segue. One of the stories that we put in, because

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again, these are all from our notes that we have

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a hundred little random things. And the one I

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wanted to share with Laurel today is she knows

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that my, I have a new niece. I've talked to her

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probably a hundred times and she was baptized

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now like two or three weekends ago. And famously,

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I'm not a religious gal. are the family in general,

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not very religious, but some of the family is.

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So baptism, smooth sailing, loved it. Super,

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super fun time. Five stars. Five stars, yes.

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Executed perfectly. Exorcism was fantastic. Wonderful.

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But then again, like I love to take pictures

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and I'm like, we didn't get dressed up for this

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for nothing. Like we're obviously going to take

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pictures, whatever. And we took a big group picture

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of everyone who, you know, was at the church

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and they were on my phone. And I went up to the,

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what do you call her Austin? It's the, not the

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priest, but that other guy, the assistant guy,

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Dave is maybe his name, bleep that out. Um, why

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do we need to bleep out Dave? Well, because they're

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going to find me at the church and they're not

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going to be happy. What did you do to Dave? No,

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I didn't do anything bad to Dave and I didn't

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do anything bad to the church and I didn't do

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anything bad to Jesus himself. No, okay. So we're

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calling Dave. He's like the deacon or something.

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He's the like assistant. He like stands on stage

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and stuff. Just the right hand man of the priest.

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Like Dave is the guy he stands on the stage on

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the side and like he got the candle and like.

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He seems to be an assistant of sorts. He brings

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up the little communion. Every priest has a Dave.

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Yes. As we know. Yes. So Dave's wife is who I

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asked to take the picture. First, wrong fucking

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choice. Camera angle, terrible. Finger over the

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thing. She takes one picture. I'm like, hey,

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just keep hitting it. We got a group of 20 here.

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And then they were like, oh, let's see it. So

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she hands back the phone. And someone in the

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first row, I'm in the back row. Someone's like,

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oh, I can't see it. It's not working. They go,

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Abby, what's your password? And I go, and Carly

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turns around at me and goes, like this. And they

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were like, Ron said again, like, what's like

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his uncle's like, what's your password? Like,

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let me, we got to check the pictures. And I was

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like, it's, ugh. Just hand me my phone. And Carly

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is laughing because literally my phone password,

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it's not numbers, it's fuck shit. So I am on

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stage at the church and they're this wonderful

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woman's like what's your password? And I could

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not look her in the eyes and say it's fuck shit.

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Type in fuck shit into my phone to look at my

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pictures. I said everyone's gonna have to hold

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here. Hand me my phone, I'm typing it in. I got

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this. But Carly knew my password, so she was

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like... And you're standing on the altar in a

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Catholic church? Yes, in a Catholic church. And

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I'm like, I can't yell my password down. And

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then I was like, it's not because I just can't

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yell. Oh, type and fuck it. So, you know, it

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caused a little issue, my password at the old,

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whatever. Am I going to have to change my phone

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password now that you all know it? No. No, you'll

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be fine. Who's going to get a hug on your phone,

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right? Hackers. Hackers. It's not like you ever

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misplaced your phone or anything. Never. Historically,

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I've never misplaced anything. This woman. This

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weekend, it's been crazy. I don't know what's

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been up with you. No, I don't either. But it's,

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I'm 29, 29. You lost your phone maybe 10 times.

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Yes. But it was right in front of you every single

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time. This whole weekend, I've been running around

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just looking for things. Half my time is just

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looking for things. But not looking that way

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in front of me every single time. It's always

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been right in front of you, babe. What? What

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a metaphor for life, right? In my 29 years, that's

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what I've learned. 29, 29. How does it feel to

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be 29? You know, when people ask that, it's like

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I feel the exact same. But I do think 29 has

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brought like a slightly different. like thinking

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about like, holy shit. Yeah, I definitely am

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like getting older because I feel as though not

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even people are always like, oh, I'm 26. Like

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I'm just forever 26 and I get that too. But personally,

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mine's more like I'm forever 22. Like I truly

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feel like I am a kid. I am in my prime and I'm

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not scared to be like 29 or scared to be 30 because

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I know my 30s are probably going to be even better

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than my 20s. They're gonna be like my 20s, but

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with like 30s money, which is excellent. So mixed

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feelings, but ultimately excited to live another

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year. Good. I love life. I love that for you.

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I love your positivity. Thank you. We need more

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of that in this world. Yeah. More of that in

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this house. Absolutely. You need to move back.

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I will. We'll come live here. Come live in my

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house. We'll bring my positivity and also my

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baggage along with me. Oh, what a good segue.

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Because my little note that I'm going to talk

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about today is about the television show Baggage.

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Now the real ones know. The real ones have seen

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it. You've seen it, right? Yes, because you used

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to play it at parties at Momo's house. We've

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played it and watched it for everyone. Oh my

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god, we did! So you've seen it too, awesome.

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So for those who don't know, it's a dating show

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of sorts where there's three contestants that

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come out and they each have a small, medium,

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and large piece of baggage, meaning like, you

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know, bad things or secrets, whatever. Usually

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they're not that bad, but you can tell that some

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of this, I mean, it's gotta be scripted. Because

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who's going on there and saying these things?

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Max and I, we have decided to try and run through

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all of it and then note down our favorite piece

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of baggage from each episode. We did not realize

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that there are hundreds of episodes. That's crazy,

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too, that they have that many people. Which also

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solidifies my theory that they're just actors,

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because how did they find all these people? Yeah.

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So anyways, that being said, we've only run through

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about six episodes, but I thought I would rattle

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off some of our favorites so far. And if you

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like us going through this show, we've done TV

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show mini -sodes before. So we can, as they work

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through them, do this again. So let us know if

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you like it. and view these with the lens of

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pretend that these are real people, and that

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if you were the contestant trying to pick them,

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whether or not you would accept this baggage.

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And can you give us a time frame, because these

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are, it's not a current show. Early 2000s. Yeah.

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So like that always makes it a little bit more...

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Yes. It's like, oh. Some of them are... Not politically

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correct. The first episode aired 2010. Okay.

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It's like mid -2000s. Okay. Yes. Still not always

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politically correct. Mid -2000s? Mid -20... Mid

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-20 is not mid -2000s. I know what you mean and

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the people will know what you mean because like

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it's midway in between 2000 and now. Exactly.

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So mid -2000s. Okay. Fucking idiot. I'm sorry.

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Please like men trying to... Mansplain centuries

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and decades to us. Okay. We're starting off strong

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with episode one, which it was really hard to

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pick one. So we actually picked two and these

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two were from the same person. Oh wow. Yeah,

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so there's for them. Their medium piece of baggage

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was I can't get a credit card for Do they explain

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it sometimes I don't I don't know. Sometimes

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it's better if there's just not an explanation.

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Like that's why we put these down. It's just

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like, God, I don't even remember what that was.

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And his biggest piece of baggage was I have a

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small penis. Oh no! So imagine, you go on a dating

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show and you have to tell your potential person,

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I can't get a credit card and I have a small

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dick. I don't think he ended up getting picked.

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I wouldn't, you know, I wouldn't pick you either.

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Nope. Episode number, oh wait, yeah, there was

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No episode number two. It's skipped to episode

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number three. Oh, number two must have been so

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bad. They had to remove it from it's not on to

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be. Yeah. Oh, is that what it's not? It's one

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of hers. Howdy or another one. Streamies. What

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Pluto? OK, I knew it was one of the. Yeah, that's

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crazy. There's just a shout out to to be we love

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to be. to be sponsor us. Yes, please. We could

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be on to be - Yeah, I know. We would be really

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good on to be. Call us up. Okay, so episode three

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was I smoke a pack a day. A pack a day? It's

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I always thought that was an exaggeration, but

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there are - There are people that do that. I

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mean, maybe not so much anymore. Yeah, I'm sure

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there still are. But like 2010, everyone's smoking

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a pack a day. Everyone. Right, Austin? He agrees.

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Okay, episode four. I'm uncircumcised. Like,

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is that baggage? Is that baggage? I don't know.

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What was that? Their small, medium, or large?

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I don't remember. It's just our favorite piece.

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That's wild. Yeah. So like it's some of these,

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would that even be considered baggage? No. I

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don't know. To sum it, to physically speaking.

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Yeah. Sure. Is baggage. Sure. Access. Correct.

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Yeah. Um, I remember there was an explanation

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about that one, but I can't remember exactly

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what it was. Well, what? The person was probably

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a child when that decision was made for them.

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Yeah. And I think they talked about how it's,

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you know, feels much better. Oh, okay. I was

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like, wow. This is daytime TV. This is, um, daytime

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TV. Episode number five. I've never driven a

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car. These. I don't know, like, and these are

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adult men and women, so I don't know. I don't

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know. Where were they from? They gotta be from

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New York City. They don't even say, which is

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why I also think all of this is made up. Yeah,

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they're just, they're from New York City and

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it's like a situation where they wouldn't need

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to. I don't think it was something like that.

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No, this just helped us. There was, yeah, yeah.

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And then finally, season one, episode six, I

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spent 90 days in a Canadian jail. Oh! Did we

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get an explanation for that one? I want the explanations,

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clearly. We did not have an explanation for that

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one, I don't think. And, you know, we're trying

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to determine in a Canadian jail, so do they lock

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you up for, they probably don't lock you up for,

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like, much there, right? Or they lock you up

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for very little. I don't know. The Canadians?

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I would tend to think that the Canadians honestly

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are pretty strict with a lot of things, but loose

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in a lot of other areas. Right, so I'm wondering,

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90 days. What's gonna get you in there for 90

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days? That's a specific amount. Yeah. It can't

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be anything too crazy. No, no it can't. But it

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could be something just like... totally random

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that the Canadians are like, that's unacceptable.

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Right. They're like, you stepped on a goose.

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Right. I was gonna, I was gonna say something

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like they were in their national parks causing

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a mess. You punched a Mountie. Yes. We should

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have a Canada episode. We should go to Canada.

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You know, you know, I know that I have a lot

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of things in a previous episode. I'm talking

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about my obviously obsession with Ronald Rousey,

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but another one of my exception obsessions was

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Canada. Have you been? Once. Where'd you go?

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Toronto. You should go to Montreal. Yeah, yeah.

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I have heard amazing things about literally everywhere

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in Canada. I desperately want to go more. It's

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crazy. I grew up in Minnesota, obviously very

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far from the border. But still, people expect

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you to be pretty much in Canada. No, never went

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until I was a grown adult. Grown adult. Austin

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and I went. But yeah, I was obsessed with Canada.

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I'm French Canadian. Austin has a Canadian flag

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in my contact name. I used to have a Canada bracelet.

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I used to really struggle between rooting for

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the Team USA men's hockey team and Team Canada.

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Team Canada is obviously incredible, and City

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of Crosby was the main reason for my obsession

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with Canada. Which is fair. Well, okay, I think

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our next business should be planning a Canada

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trip. Yeah. And then filming. and recording a

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lot there. I agree. Okay. We'll get working on

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that. Yeah. We'll take after the love of our

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lives, good children. Yes. Because they've done

00:14:19.480 --> 00:14:21.779
like an Italy trip. Yeah. And they just did their

00:14:21.779 --> 00:14:23.799
like spring break trip. Yeah. We'll do that.

00:14:24.039 --> 00:14:27.360
Yeah. Okay. I love that. Yeah. Uh, to be sponsor

00:14:27.360 --> 00:14:32.220
us to be airline sponsor. I don't think they've

00:14:32.220 --> 00:14:35.139
got the funds right now, but we'll take the planes.

00:14:35.279 --> 00:14:38.019
The planes are just sitting on the tarmac. When

00:14:38.019 --> 00:14:41.220
I flew here. I flew here for this episode and

00:14:41.220 --> 00:14:44.460
this episode only. And there's just Spirit Airlines

00:14:44.460 --> 00:14:47.840
in New York. They were just lined up on the side

00:14:47.840 --> 00:14:49.919
of the tarmac. I was like, this is crazy. It's

00:14:49.919 --> 00:14:51.700
just all these planes. For the taking. Yeah,

00:14:51.879 --> 00:14:55.220
for the taking. So maybe Spirit as a company

00:14:55.220 --> 00:14:57.700
won't, but if we want a plane, they're there

00:14:57.700 --> 00:15:00.320
for the taking. Maybe 2B will become the next

00:15:00.320 --> 00:15:03.059
airline. Yeah. And then we can really combine

00:15:03.059 --> 00:15:05.720
and we'll get a private plane, a bit niche 2B

00:15:05.720 --> 00:15:09.980
plane. Yes. I think we can work that deal out,

00:15:09.980 --> 00:15:12.039
too, with our experience. Are you kidding? Yeah.

00:15:12.299 --> 00:15:15.919
We're born friends. Yeah. Born and bred. We are

00:15:15.919 --> 00:15:18.740
going to be the attorneys in the deal. We are

00:15:18.740 --> 00:15:22.519
going to be the talent. And we will collect the

00:15:22.519 --> 00:15:26.580
checks. That's right. OK. Well, I mean, I think

00:15:26.580 --> 00:15:28.740
that's good. Do you have anything else? How much

00:15:28.740 --> 00:15:33.350
time has it been? 16 minutes. That's great! God,

00:15:33.509 --> 00:15:37.370
we are getting efficient. You're welcome. Should

00:15:37.370 --> 00:15:39.190
we sing a little song because we did so good?

00:15:39.350 --> 00:15:41.190
Oh my god, yeah, what should we sing? Ooh, ooh,

00:15:41.409 --> 00:15:49.190
awesome, give us a tune. Ooh. I know it's not

00:15:49.190 --> 00:15:52.710
what you meant, but you know. A little freestyle,

00:15:53.009 --> 00:15:55.450
skettish, skettish, skettish. Skoodle it, bubbo.

00:15:56.009 --> 00:16:00.470
This is the show. This is the mini soda. We have

00:16:00.470 --> 00:16:05.029
learned how to be a little bit quicker with our

00:16:05.029 --> 00:16:11.370
words. Yes, we have. Quick, succinct. Quick,

00:16:11.870 --> 00:16:15.330
succinct. Quick, quick, quick. We're so quick,

00:16:15.429 --> 00:16:18.360
quick, quick. Wish you were this quick, quick,

00:16:18.379 --> 00:16:20.480
quick. Wish you were this quick, quick, quick.

00:16:20.840 --> 00:16:23.620
Because we're so quick, quick, quick. We ran

00:16:23.620 --> 00:16:26.240
out of words. Because we're so quick, quick,

00:16:26.240 --> 00:16:30.700
quick. Quick, quick, quick. Quick, quick, quick.

00:16:31.460 --> 00:16:35.500
See you next week. Quick, quick, quick. Crack,

00:16:35.679 --> 00:16:37.919
crack, crack. Oh, quack, quack, quack, quack,

00:16:37.919 --> 00:16:39.179
quack, quack. Bringing back to my niece always.

00:16:39.659 --> 00:16:41.600
Crack, quack, quack. This is Auntie Ducky. I'm

00:16:41.600 --> 00:16:44.299
Auntie Ducky. That's a thing now. Austin's mom

00:16:44.299 --> 00:16:46.759
loved that. She did love it. Yeah. And it's kind

00:16:46.759 --> 00:16:48.799
of probably going to stick. Yeah. And I'm okay

00:16:48.799 --> 00:16:51.259
with it. I mean, you're like porch goose. See,

00:16:51.320 --> 00:16:53.179
but now I'm okay with it because I have so many

00:16:53.179 --> 00:16:55.279
babies coming into my life. I'm going to be a

00:16:55.279 --> 00:16:59.460
real aunt. Yeah. And anti -ducky. That sounds

00:16:59.460 --> 00:17:02.240
so like bougie. Like, oh, like the cool, rich,

00:17:02.360 --> 00:17:07.920
anti -ducky. It's so like East Coast. Yes. I

00:17:07.920 --> 00:17:11.150
love East Coast. It's like, oh, my Auntie Ducky.

00:17:11.210 --> 00:17:13.650
Auntie Ducky. She's always around. And then when

00:17:13.650 --> 00:17:15.730
I'm a grandma, I'll be like, Grandma Ducky. Yeah.

00:17:17.029 --> 00:17:21.150
I'm so excited. I love it. Oh, OK. Well, I think

00:17:21.150 --> 00:17:26.009
that's where we should end this. OK, everybody.

00:17:26.329 --> 00:17:29.309
Well, this has. Wait, no. How do we do this?

00:17:30.150 --> 00:17:36.329
All right. It's because you just got it now.

00:17:37.950 --> 00:17:40.369
It's because you want to call yourself Aunt Ducky,

00:17:40.509 --> 00:17:43.650
you know? I'm Aunt Ducky. And I'm Aunt Abby.

00:17:43.990 --> 00:17:52.690
And this has been a bit niche. It's a bit niche.

00:17:55.789 --> 00:17:59.250
Bye. Talk to her for now. Like, comment, and

00:17:59.250 --> 00:18:03.950
subscribe to our auntie podcast. Ring that bell.

00:18:09.190 --> 00:18:39.140
Can you make a duck song for us? Fucky. Cookie.

00:18:40.000 --> 00:18:50.480
Monkey. Sucky. Yeah! I don't know. He said fucky

00:18:50.480 --> 00:18:51.079
sucky.
