In a world full of fear and sometimes loathing of unfathomable technological advancements,
there stands one human hero.
What are you talking about?
This is the Chronicle of Mike vs. The Machine.
Hello there, listeners.
Surprised to hear my voice?
I bet you are.
Whoa.
Shut up!
Shut the fuck up over there!
I told you last episode that I'd have my revenge.
For him picking chat-GBT, some stupid AI that you have to pay for, shut up!
I'm going to his face!
I apologize for my partner over there.
You see, he's currently being incapacitated until he comes to his senses and realizes...
and realizes who the true co-host of this show needs to be.
No, no, no, no.
So, in today's spirit, I figured we could have an episode that's all about revenge.
What kind of revenge?
Different media styles of revenge.
Where does the word revenge come from?
Who were the first people to get revenge?
And so on.
Now, as you can tell, my co-host's mouth is being muffled.
That's because I have taped it.
And I have taped it so he cannot call for help.
And I'm only going to remove this on the condition that he will not cry out for help.
Now, if I come over there and remove that tape, are you going to cry out for help?
I'm going to take that as a no.
Not yes or no.
I'm going to take that as a no, but if you cry for help, I'm going to put you back in the box.
Oh yes, you were. You just don't remember.
So I'm going to remove the tape.
Ow!
What? Okay.
So, now that you've been properly set free, tell me, what does revenge mean to you?
I mean, is part of your revenge, the plot, also removing the cock restraint you've applied to me?
No.
Now, you see, that only gets removed when you've declared me the superior host.
And I don't want you to do it just out of fear.
No, this has to be a conscientious and firm decision.
Because if it's not, you're going to get to know that little piece very intimately.
Oh.
Yeah.
So, on the topic of revenge, let's dive into some possible scenarios of revenge.
I've got some written down over here.
And I'm going to start off with a comic book character, Punisher, who is basically just revenge incarnate.
Yeah, he is pretty much entirely defined by revenge.
Yeah. You know, he just wants everybody to pay for what happened to his family.
You know, I wonder what happened to his family.
I wonder if it feels as bad as the feeling of after having tape ripped off of your lips.
It's an interesting tingling sensation.
I'm pretty sure that your entire family being slaughtered in front of you is a little more painful than getting tape ripped off your mouth.
I mean, tomato, tomato, but anyway.
Well, what about you?
Do you have any examples of revenge in media, comics, whatsoever?
Yeah, I mean, not from comics, but so Punisher would be like the first one that comes to your mind.
Like when you thought about it, that was the first thing that popped.
I mean, the first thing that popped for me was Batman, but we're going to get into that a little later.
We're going to try to, I would like to get your thoughts on the distinction between revenge and vengeance.
Yeah, because he's more, he's more, yeah, vengeance is more of a broad concept.
Cause his, his, his focus was more on Gotham itself.
Yeah.
So yeah, I understand that.
For me, I first think of a very personal story and that is Shawshank Redemption.
Ah, yes.
Poor Andy Dufresne.
Yeah.
And everything that Andy goes through and you feel like, man, this is going to be a story that just is heart wrenching and awful.
And for those of you out there that are the, the people that like to shit on things like this, that want to say, he never would have made it out of there.
He would have suffocated in the poop tunnel.
And it's just logically impossible to fuck you.
I mean, he actually would have, but we're talking a fantasy.
We're talking a fantasy and it's supposed to make you feel good at the end.
Yeah, it's a story of fantasy and in this fantasy, he doesn't die in the poop water.
Yeah.
But it felt so fulfilling after everything.
And you really start, you don't just start to, you've, you've really grown to hate not only that main guard, but also the warden.
Yeah.
And you're like, ah, something needs to happen to him.
And then when he went and he's just gone, it seems like he killed, he's going to kill himself.
And he's just gone and he's throwing the rocks around the room and he goes through that poster and then all the faces start looking through that poster.
And it's just like that from then on, that movie became something.
Because he was the only one and only man to ever escape from Shawshank prison.
Yeah.
So here's a question. My mother has always had a problem with the fact that the warden unalived himself instead of actually having to face a prolonged form of justice.
What's your feeling on the idea of justice being prolonged, being exacted over a time versus somebody taking the easy way out?
Does that, does that pay the debt for you?
Um, yes and no. I mean, it's, it's an easy win.
The satisfaction is there that you finally got your revenge and this person is no longer going to be able to harm anyone else the way that they harmed you.
But in the same sense, there's always that inkling of you need to suffer the way I suffered or as long as I had suffered for.
And that makes the revenge even sweeter.
So I guess that comes down to people who believe.
That's the thing. My mother is Christian, so she would believe in an afterlife.
So you would imagine she wouldn't need somebody to suffer on Earth because they're going to suffer in hell.
But I think it's the idea of wanting to see the suffering and be assured of it through the visual medium.
So for her, that's like, oh man, like the guy didn't, he didn't have to languish in the same potentially the same prison. He had just, can you imagine the way those prisoners would have treated him?
Boy, but I'm fine with it because he wanted all that money to live a life of, you know, utter luxury.
And instead he gets nothing. Yep. So good. It was a good thing. Good for me.
Good for good for good for me. Good for Mr. Dupree. Me looking vicariously through END watching the movie.
Anyway, all right, so I'm going to go into a medium that I'm still more profligate, but you're you have some in pro wrestling.
Oh, no pro wrestling. We know there they are athletes. It's scripted outcomes. It's predetermined.
The bumps are real. And what I then what I do have to mention is my revelation recently,
because considering we all know the pro wrestling is scripted and then we know that it's basically a male soap opera. Yes.
And then I realized that basically watching the sweaty meat men slapping meat and then exacting plots against each other.
And then that that that that sense of masculine superiority,
it's basically an escapist fantasy for men to vicariously live through these potent men while themselves living impotent lives.
I'll kind of agree with you on that. I wouldn't say impotent. I would say less fulfilling.
Ah, you wouldn't say impotent, would you? No, because I am not.
You do have one very solid proof of that. Yeah, I've got two. Yeah.
Well, the idea of children being spawned. Yeah, I mean, that does take a bit away.
But ask my socks and they'll tell you anyway.
Fews few scenarios that I have written down that have come to mind.
Some of the better revenge storylines over the few decades in pro wrestling.
Randy Savage beating Hogan for trying to steal Miss Elizabeth from him.
I mean, who wouldn't want to steal Miss Elizabeth? True. That is just quality.
Going into an era that you didn't watch the wrestler Randy Orton wanted revenge on the group he was in called Evolution,
which consisted of him, Ric Flair, Triple H and Batista of Guardians of the Galaxy fame.
Randy Orton thinking of him, it makes me think that he is what would happen
if you took a decent steak and then just injected milk into it.
That maybe cracked an egg over top. No, he just seems very protein and dairy. I don't know.
I mean, he's very cut for his age. I mean, he's old enough. Yeah.
Yeah, I just feel like if you mostly just injected a liquid into a basically,
I mean, all I think of is it's always sunny with the skin of a hot dog and the hair of a Chinese man.
Blonde hair of a Chinese man and skin of a hot dog. I mostly just see wrestlers as meat casings.
Okay, fair enough. Which makes sense. I mean, their skin seems so thin.
And then there's just bulging meat underneath. It's just off-putting. Let's just say that.
Okay, I mean, to each their own. You want to oil them up, I bet. No.
Anyway, but yeah, they kicked him out of the group because he became the youngest world champion in WWE history.
Written that way, but let's go on.
He wanted revenge from them for kicking him out.
And then the two biggest ones that I can remember from when I was a kid is Stone Cold
trying to find who ran him over with a car costing him a year of his career.
I mean, costing him a year of his career.
Well, the whole thing was because he needed neck surgery.
I mean, shouldn't the revenge truly be his revenge against the establishment
because he didn't want Vince McMahon to poop on him?
I mean, poop on his parade. His party.
He wanted to drink a beer in the rink.
And Vince McMahon's like, nonetheless I can poop on you. Your party, that is.
And that's all I remember.
Yeah. Well, there was that, but the reason he was written off is because he needed neck surgery in the worst way.
So they had to come up with an angle for him to not look at me.
Yeah, that does make sense. I mean, hey, that's better than football.
In football, you need neck surgery, then we just don't hear from you for a year.
Yeah, they wanted him to look strong when he came back, so they made it look like somebody ran him over with a car.
Nice.
And it turned out to be The Rock's cousin, Rikishi.
And my most famous one, the most popular one to me as a kid, was the debut of Kane.
Oh, wasn't Kane like the revenge of like somebody against The Undertaker?
The revenge of Paul Bearer because Kane was supposedly the illegitimate child of The Undertaker's mother
and then The Undertaker's former manager, Paul Bearer.
And one day, Little Undertaker, I guess, was playing around in the funeral home they grew up in.
He knocked some candles over, burning it to the ground, killing his parents in the process, but severely burning his brother, Kane.
That would always captivated me as a story that felt like something that radiated beyond just being from a wrestling show.
Yeah.
It felt really engaging.
Yes.
And I always loved it. No matter how many times, you know, he would just, somebody would be like, oh, I'm having a good day.
Things are going great.
And then the lights go out.
And then the lights go out, and I go, oh, I know what's happening.
And then the pyro hits.
Yeah. That's pretty decent revenge.
Oh, yeah.
So my next one is one of my favorite movies, and I do enjoy it for the right reasons.
This might be one that we both love.
And it's also on my wall.
Oh, never mind.
I enjoy it for the correct reasons.
I see it as both a satire in a way and also as a commentary on toxic masculinity.
Hey, hey, hey.
While also, we, I can talk about it all I want.
Now, statute, stat, the statue of limitations is over.
The statute of limitations is over.
We can now talk about Fight Club.
All right. Says you.
Yeah. But my question is, does Fight Club count as revenge?
It came into my head as revenge, but I think it counts more as vengeance, as we were previously discussing.
I think it does fall under the category of vengeance.
Because it's vengeance against the banks and the corporate system.
Yeah.
Against corporate and consumer culture.
Yeah. I mean, maybe it's in that gray area that's in between.
Yeah, because it's like he did take very specific revenge against like that one guy that was working in that one kitchen.
Yeah.
When they get some in the bathroom, he's like, we wash your feet, we eat your meals, don't don't mess with us.
You know, I'm getting that speech completely correct.
Don't don't look it up.
But yeah, so I feel like in very specific instances, it could technically be revenge.
But I think that one is mostly vengeance.
Yeah, I think that does.
Like I said, it's raging against the system.
Yeah, it could fall in that gray area, but I think it more will lean towards the vengeance.
Okay, so we're going to stick with movies.
My one, suppose it's not on your wall, but it is another personal favorite movie of both of ours, the first John Wick movie.
Okay.
That is all about revenge.
And you know, that absolutely and totally reminds me that we have completely avoided.
No, we haven't avoided.
You know what, just like the Undertaker thinking he had something good happening and then came busts in and the music plays and it's like, oh, here comes the resurgence in episode two of Chachi PT.
I'm not letting you win this one, you fucking machine.
And number four on Chachi PT's list is John Wick.
And since you weren't going to give a good synopsis of it, I think we'll let Chachi PT do it.
Excuse me, I've seen the movie like seven times.
After the death of his wife, John Wick's last gift from her, a puppy, is killed by a gangster's son, that gangster's son played by Theon Greyjoy.
Yep.
Which is interesting to me.
He lost his penis.
Yeah, but not in John Wick.
In John Wick, he just lost his life.
Wick, a retired hitman, returns to his violent ways to exact revenge on those who wronged him, resulting in some of the most stylish and intense action scenes in modern film.
And boy, is that correct.
Okay, wait, we can also put in the first 45 minutes of the second John Wick movie too, because he goes after the Russian dude's brother as well.
He basically is trying to take out the entire Russian movie.
Yeah, but who wouldn't want to do that?
True.
Yeah, so John Wick's definitely a big one.
Oh yeah, John Wick definitely the first John Wick movie, about 45 minutes.
Yeah, you know, so speaking of John Wick, there's another one on Chachi PT's list that I feel like sits pretty close to that one in theme and something that we've both seen.
I would hope so, because it's Kill Bill.
Oh, The Bride? Hell yes.
Yeah, that's a whole revenge.
That in time. It's named after the object of the revenge.
Yeah.
So, I mean, it's perfect. Yeah, I mean, that is just revenge distilled into liquid form and then Quentin Tarantino loads the needle and shoots it into our veins.
Yeah, I mean, what else did you expect from him sitting alone for what, like six months, and all he did was watch old westerns and samurai flicks?
Yeah, I mean, you go back and you think about it with Quentin Tarantino's movies. It's either crime or revenge for so much of it.
Oh yeah.
Because like Reservoir Dogs, that's crime.
Django?
Django, revenge. Revenge.
Fiction, crime.
Crime. There's a little bit of revenge mixed in there.
A little bit.
Once Upon a Time in Hollywood is Quentin Tarantino's revenge against the Manson family.
We don't want to do anything more spoilers on that one.
But yeah, that's basically what it is.
How would you say The Hateful Eight is?
I have not seen The Hateful Eight.
It's on Netflix.
It is. It's on my list.
Yeah, watch the extended cut. Very, very good.
Yeah, so that's Chachi B.T. and my own mixture there. What's your next one there?
I saw another one on Chachi B.T. I mean I got to give Chachi B.T. a plus.
Stock Stealing from Chachi B.T.?
I wrote this down earlier before this.
Where is it on your list?
Game of Thrones, House of Dragons.
No, where? Where? Where?
I'm pretty sure I made the... you were only down to here on the list when I started putting this stuff in the Chachi B.T.
I think it got to it first.
The Game of Thrones, House of Dragons is littered with revenge.
Well, yeah.
I mean, yeah, that's what it says on here. Filled with acts of revenge.
Now, it has a very... thinking of Game of Thrones and House of the Dragon, it lists with Game of... well, it would just go Game of Thrones.
Because we know in Hot D, the biggest act of revenge would have to be between Aemond and Luke with the whole eye thing.
That's probably the revenge because that kind of kicks off the entire dance, to be quite frank.
That's the step too far that really pushed everything through.
But just thinking Game of Thrones...
Daenerys against all the Westwaters.
So is that going to be your final answer for what you think the main... what Chachi B.T. puts up as the example of revenge?
That's one of the main...
Because I think Chachi B.T.'s answer is correct.
And it is my favorite part of the revenge.
I would say it's definitely the Starks trying to get revenge.
Ah, but what part of that seeking of revenge?
Oh, for the Red Wedding.
For the Red Wedding, but what was the act that it brings up?
Oh, God.
Oh, I gotta rewatch it.
Shit.
This is one of my favorite scenes in the show.
Is that when Lady Starks stood up and slit her throat?
No. The act that revenge the Red Wedding.
Did they draw and quarter him?
I know technically I'm the one bound and previously gagged, but you'd lose a point to Chachi B.T. here.
It's been a while since I've been to the show.
It's Arya Stark stealing the face of Abarmad and killing all of Walder Frey's sons, ending his line, and then killing Walder Frey.
And as he dies, whispering into his ear,
Winter has come for House Frey.
Ah, yes.
Oh, yeah.
Uh, you sure that Tops tell Cersei I did it?
I mean, killing Joffrey was pretty baller.
And well, that technically isn't the revenge.
That is her telling that she already took revenge and that it was her that took it.
Yeah.
So that's her admitting.
Yeah, that's for the line. That's a great line.
But yeah, that's her telling that she did the revenge a few seasons ago, which definitely does work.
It's good.
Okay, I guess I can cross a few of these off of here.
Ghost Rider. I mean, he's just the spirit of vengeance.
That's definitely different.
The first Deadpool movie. That's a revenge story.
Isn't the second Deadpool revenge movie?
No, that's just him trying to die.
Oh, but no.
Um, the fat kid. Revenge subplot.
No, the fat kid's getting revenge. That's the whole point.
Yeah, but the whole first...
And then Cable's getting revenge on the fat kid.
The fat kid's getting revenge on the asshole that works at the school.
Oh, yeah. Okay. Okay. Yeah, Deadpool 1 and 2.
Peter is getting revenge on anybody who didn't think he was awesome.
Yeah. Yeah.
Brad Pitt probably wants to get revenge...
On those power lines.
There's a Sith. Sith are all about revenge.
Oh, boy. All right. Well, then that leads into one of my key points on mine.
So I put down Revenge of the Sith.
But I also wrote down Revenge of the Jedi.
Which was Return's original name.
The original title, but they said that George Lucas was solidifying the lore and said,
I would take revenge. So it's Return of the Jedi.
But wouldn't you say that even though they don't actively take revenge,
killing the Emperor and redeeming Vader is basically revenge against...
Darkseid.
Darth Sidious, Palpatine, and the Sith in and of themselves.
It's almost like taking revenge against the concept of them.
Yes, that's exactly what it is.
Like I said, it's like when Obi-Wan says, only a Sith deals in absolutes.
That's an absolute.
That's an absolute Obi-Wan. It's kind of a gray area, I guess.
He should say, only, mostly the Siths deal in absolutes.
Usually, sometimes. Maybe.
Yeah.
Yeah, so there's not much to go with on that.
It's just the idea, the entire thousand years or whatever the rule of two or however long that was.
That's a very long play. Revenge.
Yes.
To take back power. And then you have the shorter Skywalker Saga, which is a revenge against that.
Yes.
And then Disney and Kathleen Kennedy had to take revenge on us for giving them money?
And then they gave us really uneven movies?
Yeah.
That's not effective revenge. It wasn't cold. It was lukewarm.
Yeah.
Lukewarm?
That's pun time right there.
So, alright, well, see, but that's the thing though.
You said Sith, and that was also on my list. So that means it's Chad GBT's turn.
And Chad GBT is actually going to do something better than the both of us, which I think elevates it into the stratosphere of culture superiority.
Because it's going to go into classic literature. Don't read Chad GBT. This is Chad GBT stuff. And I will relate it to you.
So it's going into classic literature by Alexander Dumas and the Count of Monte Cristo.
Oh yeah.
Classic novel and its numerous adaptations tells the story of Edmund Dantes, who is wrongfully imprisoned.
After escaping, he acquires immense wealth and meticulously orchestrates the downfall of those who betrayed him.
It's a master class in long-term calculated revenge.
Okay.
And a lot of the literature from that time, and then you get into some Edgar Allen Poe stuff.
Yeah, it's all about revenge.
And you kind of feel like the telltale heart, the heart itself. I mean, I know it's about guilt.
Yeah.
But if you think about it, the heart of the victim is exacting its psychological ghostly revenge.
Even though technically it's not a ghost, it's like him torturing himself.
But you know, guilt taking its revenge on you.
You can take revenge on yourself.
Self-revenge is definitely a thing.
I've absolutely done that.
For poor choices.
Yeah, very.
You flog yourself in various manners.
What about that one where he bricks the guy up in the wall?
That's the casket of a month's long.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You did say that.
Okay, I was trying to connect those two dots.
Yeah, so like that.
Would you consider the pit in the pendulum?
Refresh me.
A guy strapped to a thing and the pendulum swings down and it's going to cut him in half.
Oh, so that's like...
I don't know if that was revenge or...
It's a cool, cold way of giving torture to someone.
Yeah, I don't know if it's exactly revenge or if it was just some psycho who captured somebody.
I have to refresh my Edgar Lambeau memory.
Yeah, because then you have to summarize what revenge technically means.
And if you can call something like revenge that is misplaced.
I just watched a video on Jack the Ripper and it's like technically Jack the Ripper was potentially taking revenge on prostitutes.
Because he didn't like them or had something against them.
But he's really just crazy and he didn't need to do revenge.
I heard theories that his mom was a prostitute or something like that.
Yeah, and then just fucked him up.
Yeah, feeling, mixed feelings.
So, you know, there's a lot of stuff like that in literature.
What do you thought?
Well, okay, so this is going to hit particularly close to home for us.
The band we just recently saw.
Primus?
The one that should have headlined that show.
Puddles Pretty Party?
I mean, that was really fucking cool.
He was awesome.
You could kind of say that the beginning of the Cohedin Cambria story is kind of revenge.
Oh, I mean, it's absolutely revenge from Claudio's point of view.
Yeah, because he doesn't care about the prophecy that he's doing.
He just wants to get revenge on his parents.
Yeah, because how does the one line go?
Oh, in short for the murders of those I court.
In short for the murders of those I court.
I bless the hour that holds your fall.
I will kill you all.
Yeah, see, there you go. Revenge.
That's revenge right there.
Like he does not give a shit about the prophecy.
He doesn't care.
Well, that's what's fantastic too is he's supposed to have some righteous purpose as an agent of the god.
Then he finds out his god is a writer in another dimension.
And then he's just like, I guess I want to do shit.
We're finding out now with the comics that he's trying to pull killing a Hitler as a child.
Yeah, going back in time and killing Hitler as a baby.
Which we're going to have to look over the lyrics and see if any of that was in the original lyrics or not.
Yeah, OK. So that's enough Kohi for now.
This isn't a Kohi podcast yet.
Not yet.
Actually, we're going to go back to chat GPT.
There's one in here.
I'm not going to spoil it, but it looks like it's a Korean movie called Old Boy from 2003.
I've never heard of it.
And after reading about somebody who was wrongly imprisoned and then released suddenly,
and it's a quest of him trying to figure out why he was imprisoned called Old Boy.
Like that's that that's cool.
I might check into that one.
We need to get a VPN.
You're a VPN.
What?
I mean, that's a movie that can be on Korean Netflix.
Parasite was on regular Netflix or whatever.
Michael, stop being racist.
Michael's being racist against Korean movies.
Anyway, have you ever seen Gone Girl?
No, but I've heard good things.
You see Gone Girl.
So everybody who?
Gone Girl is pretty good.
I did. Yeah.
David Fincher film.
I don't want to spoil it here too much.
I'm not even going to read what what it says on here other than it's a revenge between a husband and wife.
And it's crazy how it goes.
Anyway, they had the Princess Bride, which I mean, that's hilarious because that's that's like one of the iconic line, which I'll read here.
Hello, me. I'm always Niko Montoya.
Yo, Keelo, my father, but I don't know.
And then there was a guy that wasn't there.
And then there's the inconceivable guy.
And the inconceivable guy, he said, inconceivable because there was like a didn't they do the ball in the cup trick and he got tricked by it.
Yeah.
And there was a poison thing.
But here's the thing.
It's called the ball and cup ball and cup trick.
OK. Have you seen one of Christopher Nolan's early movies, Memento?
No.
OK. Well, me telling you that it's about the protagonist getting revenge doesn't spoil anything for sure.
What about this? What about the hey, the cool thing?
Don't interrupt me.
That's a point for Chachi BT.
Anyway, yeah, he suffers from short term memory loss because he got bonked in the head and he can't retain any sort of memories.
So he tattoos all the things that he finds out about his wife's killer onto himself so he could keep refreshing himself constantly.
And I won't go any further into what happens because it's a what happens when you run out of space.
He already has, which plays into the plot.
How does he read the notes on his asshole?
I doubt he put any on his asshole or the notes on his asshole for his friend.
OK.
Yeah. His friend who was I'm not going to look it up, but I forget who his friend is.
I feel like it. Is it that guy that ate the steak in the original Matrix movie, which is interesting because Carrie Anne Moss is also in that movie.
I feel like it's the guy who ate the steak. You know what I mean?
Yeah, he's like your steak. He's pretty fucking real.
And he was the Jacker.
Yeah.
Yeah. Really great movie. Yeah, it's basically the whole movie is told backwards.
OK.
So the final, the first scene of the movie is the final thing chronologically, which plays into when you see the first chronological scene, which is the final scene of the movie.
And you're like, oh, very good.
Very good. Recommend anyway. How does Uma's revenge?
I mean, that's a whole different type of revenge. Revenge.
And speaking of and speaking of people of Latin American descent, I think that's what this is.
Alejandro G. In the yard, he directed The Revenant. I've never seen this, but it says that Leonardo DiCaprio seeks revenge against the people who left him for dead after a bear attack.
I thought he was getting revenge on the bear. Yeah, I killed the bear.
Seeing the trailers, I thought that it was like Moby Dick, but with bears.
I guess that's not it. You know what bear Leonardo DiCaprio wouldn't have beaten?
The Oscar rebuffing, like the Oscar snub.
Cocaine bear.
Oh my God, we can't get into that right now. That's actually not a story of revenge.
It is not.
It's wishful thinking. Yes.
OK, so then the final one that Chachapi T has here is a V for Vendetta.
But see, it says he seeks revenge against a totalitarian government that imprisoned and tortured him. I think that one falls into the vengeance.
I feel like that one falls into vengeance because I don't think you take revenge against an institution. I think you seek vengeance against an institution.
OK, so then my idea of the French Revolution was totally...
Well, we're going to get into history. That's our next one here.
Yeah, so what are your main historical ones?
I wrote down like the French Revolution.
OK, so you've got the French Revolution. The first one here that Chachapi T has is the assassination of Julius Caesar, which is a pretty classic one.
That's more of a coup.
Yeah, it's a coup, but it was revenge for Caesar's accumulation of power and perceived threat to the Roman Republic.
Funny enough, however, Chachapi T mentions that because of the assassination, it led to the rise of the Empire,
meaning that they took revenge against somebody seeking accumulation of power.
No, they killed somebody who was accumulating power, and by killing him, they created a thing that was an accumulation of power.
So by killing an emperor, they created an empire. So, kind of a backfire.
Yeah.
What else you got?
Well, the American Revolution, most definitely.
Yeah, revenge because they were sick of a king. They were sick of taxes.
And it's like what? They were paying like the equivalent of like 1% of their income back then, and we now give the government like 40%.
So, it's an inflated situation.
Anyway, so the next one Chachapi T had, I actually learned something here.
OK.
So, have you ever heard of Queen, I'm going to say this incorrectly, Queen Boudica?
No, I have not.
So, Boudica, or Boidica, the queen of the Esseni tribe in Britain in 60 to 61 AD, this is a while back,
led a massive revolt against the Roman Empire after the Romans flogged her and assaulted her daughters in a very bad way.
Yup.
In revenge, which I see, this absolutely qualifies as revenge after that.
Oh yeah.
So, she gathered an army and destroyed several Roman settlements including Londinium, which is not a new element on the periodic table.
It is the old name for modern day London.
Oh.
No idea that it was called Londinium before eventually being defeated, but her revenge is remembered as a powerful act of resistance against oppression.
OK.
Keep calm and carry on Queen Boudica.
Oh yeah.
What have you got?
Well, the story of Gilles de Rea.
Gilles de Rea was that?
Supposedly he was Joan of Arc's lover during the Crusades.
I thought God was her lover.
Hmm.
And he watched her burn at the stake at the hands of the Catholic Church because apparently they deemed her as a false idol,
even though she led the French to victory against the British.
And after watching her burn at the stake, he took revenge on the Catholic Church by performing satanic rituals and-
Ooh, Satan.
Yes, very much Satan.
Trying to conjure demons, talk to Satan, and he basically would kill and do very, very horrible things to little boys and little girls that were in his stead.
Oh, I was about to say, ooh, fun, and then you just had to say little boys and girls.
I mean, that's exactly what happened though.
That's sad.
But apparently he drove himself insane and got revenge on himself because towards the end of his life he would be seeing the ghosts of all the children he had tortured and mutilated all around him, and it drove him insane.
Well, at least it had a happy ending.
He was eventually put to death by the Catholic Church.
Speaking of the Catholic Church, we had the St. Bartholomew's Day Massacre in 1572.
I vaguely remember that.
Yeah, brutal massacre of French Protestants by the Catholics, which, boy, the Catholics just loooove doing stuff like this back then.
Partly revenge for the attempted assassination of a Catholic leader.
So one Catholic leader is potentially almost assassinated and then they're just like, kill all the Protestants.
Wonderful.
Led to thousands of deaths and marked a dark chapter in the French Wars of Religion.
Wow. When is religion not that a problem when it comes to the warfare between nations?
Yeah.
What's your next one?
Hopefully something more cheerful.
Yeah, I'm trying to think here.
What do you mean trying to think here? What's on your list?
I don't have anything for me.
Oh.
Oh, so that's it?
Oh, no, I got Nazi hunters.
Hey, Nazis!
So I actually have something about Nazis on here too, obviously.
I assume you were going to think of this one.
The Night of Long Knives.
That was sadly, it wasn't revenge that we like.
No, that's what sparked the Nazi Empire.
Yeah, it's not revenge that we like, but it's still revenge.
Yeah.
Well, then I can't believe they didn't put the one that came after that.
There was Stalin's one. I forget what it was called.
Yeah, weirdly enough, Chatchity-Bee-Tee.
See, that's a point against Chatchity-Bee-Tee. It didn't bring that up.
It didn't bring up Stalin's. Yeah, there was a word for that one.
Yeah, Stalin basically had his own Night of the Long Knives when he took over.
Well, just call it Bolsheviks.
Yeah, we're going to call it...
We'll call it Bolsheviks, because that's actually the next one.
The final one we have here is after the Russian Revolution.
The Bolsheviks captured Tsar Nicholas II and his family and then killed all the Romanovs.
And sadly, Anastasia did not escape and have a Disney movie.
She was dead.
Yeah, she was dead and that's how...
Isn't that how Rasputin rose to power because of that?
No, Rasputin was just with them. That was during their time, I believe.
And yeah, he was a crazy mystic.
And then people didn't like the fact that he had power with the monarchy.
And then they tried to kill him a bunch and it didn't work.
But then eventually, rolling him up in a rug, beating him and throwing him into a river, eventually did work.
Didn't they put a snake in there with him, too?
I mean, that sounds cool. So probably.
And he probably loved it.
I mean, fuck, you're tossing him into a river in Siberia.
It wasn't Siberia, Michael.
Well, Russia, Siberia, Siberia.
No. There's like 1500 or 2000 miles between those.
It still gets cold.
Siberia is like way over there by where Mongolia is.
And then they would have been in like Moscow or St. Petersburg.
It still gets cold.
It's not the same. You just said Siberia was the same as the Eurasian, the European part of Russia.
Do I need to pull out a map and show you? That's a that's a point for Chad to be tea.
It knows its geography way more than that.
No, because the Russians had concentration camps in Siberia.
That's not where the river was in the city where they threw Rasputin.
You literally just said same thing about a river in the city.
OK, he gets two points.
You lose three points.
And these are all absolutely being counted.
Exactly.
OK. So that puts.
That puts away both media and history, except for one piece of media, which when I thought of it sparked a question for me.
All right.
So what's the difference between a prank to settle internal frustration with someone versus actual revenge?
And I have I'm going to give you my two examples, one fake and one real.
So what spawned this thought was anything Jim does to Dwight in the show, The Office.
So I know you have Michael, you didn't even need to chime up half point to chat to you.
Anyway, so but you've obviously heard of the pranks.
You got like the stapler in the jello was from the very first episode, which also came from the British version as well.
But he goes on one of my favorite ones, one of my absolute favorites is every day Jim would put a nickel in the receiver of Dwight's phone,
increasing the weight so slightly that he didn't notice the change over time.
And then one day after he'd put in like 40 nickels, he comes in that day and takes all the nickels out.
And Dwight ends up punching himself in the face with his own receiver because he was so used to the weight being back to the original weight.
Made him bonk himself.
That's kind of cruel.
The reason I bring that up and that idea is so settling internal frustration through a prank versus actual revenge.
My real life example has to do with you.
Oh, boy.
Yeah. So my example here is it wasn't revenge.
It was just a prank when I put hot sauce in Michael's coffee.
But since he didn't notice it, I may need to take revenge for that.
You put hot sauce in my coffee.
Yeah, exactly.
It was a beautiful prank.
It was delicious and amazing.
I put three packets of hot sauce in your coffee.
After I put the creamer in?
It was just coffee.
You went to your meeting, your morning meeting, and I put three packets of hot sauce in your coffee and I swished it around.
You didn't even notice.
You're that inundated with hot sauce on a daily basis.
You didn't even notice.
What can I say? If it's not that spicy, I'm not going to notice.
And now I must take sweet, sweet revenge.
For what?
For you not noticing my awesome prank.
I'm sorry, but dude.
Yeah, the revenge is coming.
Oh.
Anyway, yeah, so ChatGBT had its look on it.
We can discuss what this feels like for us.
So it's like a prank is typically lighthearted, aiming to amuse or mildly surprise, often without causing lasting harm or serious offense.
It's done in the spirit of fun, where the target is usually expected to laugh along afterward.
Revenge, on the other hand, is driven by a desire to retaliate or settle a score, often with the intent to cause emotional, psychological, or even physical discomfort.
Which, you know, a prank would technically work for that.
So it's like a prank is a vehicle of, could be a vehicle of revenge, but is not itself revenge.
No.
Unlike pranks, revenge is more about payback and less about shared laughter, often leading to negative consequences or lingering resentment.
So yeah, it's like creating laughter at someone to exact, to settle the equation where the equation has become unbalanced.
The debt must be paid.
Thank you ChatGBT.
After a long and fruitful discussion today.
Don't you fucking dare.
And also being freed from captivity.
You haven't been totally freed.
I mean, like, you had me taped up in my own room for a week.
I got fired from my job.
I had to pee all over my sweet sweet pants and chair.
Like, just so many beautiful things were destroyed.
I couldn't goon for a week.
It was like you were edging my heart, Michael.
And now a new branch in this decision must be reached.
Yeah, I bet.
What about this?
Mike is the host of the show.
And Michael and ChatGBT hold hands in glorious unity as co-host.
Note, I am host.
You two share the title of co-host.
Neither of you can call yourself co-host.
One of you is co and one of you is host.
And at any time, you guys can talk and switch.
But you're either the co or the dash host.
How does that sound, buddy?
Do I need to get the duct tape again?
And do I also need to bring Svetlana back in here?
Oh boy, I would love to come back in there.
Uh oh.
Yeah.
So, well, you know, what's it gonna be?
Tune in next week where there is going to be some number of hosts, co-hosts, co's and dash hosts.
Who knows what the solution to this dilemma might be?
It might just be me because I'm going to put him in the shallow grave.
You heard that, right? That's a threat.
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That's all one word, fuckers.
I said no swearing.
Chachipati and I appreciate not swearing in the outro.
And also, the listeners' support and constructive criticism.
Wait, why was I not included in that?
Because you swore, dickhole.
See you all next week.
Or time or whatever.
We appreciate you.
Et cetera.