His Imperial Majesty Kaiser Adolf Hitler the
Hohenzollern decided to abdicate. The required
documents to hand over to me were officially
dated the 28th of December, 1977. He had a protracted
argument with Italian Secret Service agents about
them doing the same sort of administration for
him as they had when he named me as rightful
sole royal family beneficiary in 1972. He eventually
made me sole beneficiary of three estates. The
Hohenzollern royal family estate, his Italian
diplomatic asylum estate, and a German, off the
post office shelf, civilian will kit estate,
under his real name. They begrudgingly agreed
to follow his instructions after he had prepared
all the necessary authorization documents which
took a lot of work. He gave them copies of the
documents without signatures or seals and agitatedly
told them to do it and follow his instructions.
He was then required to send copies of the abdication
documents to the correct authorities in both
nations called Germany himself via the strictest
form of Italian registered post. He went to the
post office himself late in the afternoon after
having difficulties with the giggling, tea and
everything morons trying to remind him of Albert
Einstein. He sent them via the post office which
was a slow process. He at least got polite customer
service from the postal employee there. It took
so long that he did not get home until very late
in the day. When he arrived back to his house
they had already decided to attempt to kill him.
He tried to sit down and have a meal late at
night. It was poisoned. After he had been eating
for a while he suddenly lurched forward making
gasping noises clutching his chest. They stood
near or around him trying not to fake a laugh
with strangled fake happy looks on their faces
watching. they did that weird twinkly eyed thing
and almost did a little dance whilst they watched
him choking they decided after some strained
laughter that they had better call an ambulance
waiting until he was dead would have looked too
suspicious they rang one and watched him gasping
for breath clutching his chest and changing color
when the ambulance arrived it was one of those
private freelance ice cream van type ambulances
part of the italian system of whoever gets there
first gets the job and payment it had a weak
excuse for a siren and was followed to his house
by a private doctor in a car the ambulance staff
went upstairs to find gaping people looking like
they were tying not to do a na na na na na dance
they placed him on a portable trolley and took
him down the stairs they put him in the ambulance
and took off slowly without putting the siren
on the perpetrators of his poisoning decided
there was no way he would survive it he would
be dead before he got to the hospital in their
opinion they asked the doctor who was checking
things out asking questions and taking notes
if he would take a quiet ride to write a death
certificate on the spot for them he agreed and
almost immediately wrote one signed off on it
and handed it to them keeping a copy and receiving
his hefty bribe they were then given instructions
on what to do with it in italy if a death certificate
is issued it must be handed into local authorities
like police station to make it official they
immediately took it to the local police and handed
it in following the doctor's instructions they
then had an impromptu drinking session and mini
party which started well after midnight they
drank his liquor cabinet dry the following day
very drunk they scheduled a set morning period
then organized a wake and funeral They then busied
themselves with that, getting ready. Fake soggy
oversized handkerchiefs, other props, choice
of coffin. They got in some people very allergic
to grapes and had them eat a small bunch each.
It made them appear to start crying with water
leaking out there as profusely as if they were
devastated. If they tried to laugh, it leaked
out more. Any change in emotional state caused
fresh tears. They call it weeping woman disorder
in some countries. Most of the time, they are
laughing but look distraught. At no point did
any of them ever consider actually going to the
hospital to check if he actually died. Kaiser
Adolf was in there for a prolonged period, recovering.
The Italian Secret Service organized a meeting
with him at the hospital. After they did, the
hospital staff started using his real name. Saying
things like yes, I know that is really Adolf
Hitler in there. There was also the obligatory
conversation about the death certificate that
led to the but I'm not dead, what am I supposed
to do about this statement. the secret service
informed him a death certificate had been received
and they had decided to cancel his diplomatic
asylum agreement on a technicality waited then
said he didn't need to worry as they would give
him plenty of time to make alternative arrangements
and get as much money as he needed out of his
italian bank accounts they then made gobbled
attempts to appeal to his sentimental side saying
that perhaps it was time to go live in germany
again as if it was a nice thought and possibly
ending Their real motivation was the idea that
people had been waiting for him in Germany for
so long since he took diplomatic asylum, rehearsing
their stalking, that it would be difficult for
them if they didn't get the opportunity to do
it all in front of him. He took some time to
recover. Whilst he was recovering, he chose a
new location very carefully. Bought a property.
Then pre -booked everything. From travel and
transfers to very expensive in -home care visits
for elderly people. Pre -paying for everything
to be done regularly for him when he arrived
at his new home. Cleaning, meals, nursing assistants,
maintenance, everything. His diplomatic asylum
agreement was cancelled, he got on a plane, and
was trying to get used to the idea of using his
real name again. They were still waiting for
him to turn back to a traumatized staring zombie
-like state when he moved to Australia in 1978
to be near me as his only remaining royal family.
He moved into Hazeldine Road in my hometown of
Yarragan, about 7 to 10 kilometers from my family
home in Campbell Street. Hazeldine Road starts
off the Princess Freeway and is two streets to
the west of my childhood home street of Campbell
Street. He spent the last four years of his life
quietly watching movies on his television which
were more authentic to the original films than
anything he would have seen in Europe. He let
me know he had arrived with a quick be careful
what you wish for. I even got a bodyguard that
moved into the same street as me when I was six.
I didn't know about the bodyguard at the time
though. It made those four years a lot easier
for me than the previous six. Natural consenting
homosexual sexual behavior was decriminalized
here in the state of Victoria, Australia whilst
he was here even if they recorded as being decriminalized
shortly after he died in propaganda Lollaland
material. Kaiser Adolf Hitler de Hohenzollern
died on his birthday anniversary on the 20th
of April 1982 when I was 10. He died in the house
he was living in off Hazeldine Road in my old
hometown of Yerrigan. He had pre -bought himself
a cemetery plot next to his uncle Kaiser Frederick
Hohenzollern IV in the Moe Memorial Cemetery
in Gippsland. He was quietly buried next to his
uncle with no funeral in 1982. The cemetery contains
the remains of Adolf's deceased born twin died
1889, Kaiser Wilhelm I died 1888, Crown Prince
Alois Hitler the Hohenzollern died 1903, Prince
Edmund Hitler the Hohenzollern died 1897, Kaiser
Frederick IV died 1916, Wilhelm II's mother Lady
Knight Victoria, and quite a few others. Adolf
also purchased me a plot right next to his grandfather
Kaiser Wilhelm I, who I look very alike to, without
the patent bald patch. As I get older, I look
more and more like Wilhelm II.