Hi everybody, welcome back to my little corner
of the internet. I'm Eric from timeswithtire
.co .uk and today I'm tackling a topic that's
been lurking in the shadows, waiting to pounce
on unsuspected couples. Now before you panic
and assume I'm about to launch into the diatribe
of unmarital bliss going tragically wrong, well
let's clarify this isn't about divorce, this
is about, well... It's about that glorious, long
-awaited phase of life where you finally get
to retire, to kick back, to sip gin and tonics
at 3pm without a shred of guilt, and to spend
every waking and indeed sleeping moment with
the person you pledged your eternal love to,
your spouse. Retirement. The dream. The golden
years. No more canutes. No more demanding bosses.
No more... early alarms just you and them all
the time every meal every square inch of the
house suddenly that charming idiosyncrasy you
adored in your partner for 30 years well let's
just say it's got a little louder a little bit
more omnipresence because let's be honest for
decades your relationship has been a beautifully
choreographed dance of separation and reunion.
You had your work, your hobbies, your independent
life. Your spouse, they had theirs. You'd come
home, share the highlights, maybe commiserate
and then retreat to the TV for a bit of decompression.
It was glorious, it was balanced, but it's gone.
Now, your Venn diagram of life is just one giant,
glorious... sometimes suffocating circle and
that my friends is this all truly begins it's
not a benevolent force it's just the gentle insisting
nudging of reality saying hey remember the person
you married well you're about to get to know
them really well so what happens when two people
used to have carefully cultivated pockets of
personal space and individual routines and they
suddenly find themselves sharing every single
moment or for starters the kitchen becomes about
the field or at very least that very crowded
negotiation table and who makes breakfast who
cleans the dishes and then does the remote control
it's a sacred relic often held by one person
for decades now It's a highly contested item.
And it could lead to diplomatic negotiations
with the UN. Now, do we watch documentaries about
obscure historical figures or that trashy reality
show? Then the stakes are high. But it's not
just about trivialities. It's on deeper ships.
The way you communicate. The way you deal with
conflict. Because... When you're together 24
-7, there's less time for things to fester in
silence. Everything comes to the surface and
that, surprisingly, can be a good thing. And
that's because retirement forces you to re -evaluate,
to actively communicate, to negotiate. It's not
just about dividing the chores up or carving
out a new space for yourself. with physical and
emotional. It's about honouring the shared life
you've built. So how do you navigate this glorious,
terrifying, utterly delightful change? Well,
here's a few Eric -approved strategies. Number
one, the designated sanctuary. You need a spot,
a room, a corner. even a really comfortable armchair,
a place where you can retreat, recharge, or remember
what silence is all about. And your partner needs
one too, of course. And then there's number two,
the scheduled separation. Now it sounds counterintuitive,
but actively plan individual activities, whether
it's separate hobbies, meeting up with your own
friends, or just going for a solo walk. Absence.
In for an hour or so truly can make the heart
grow fonder. And sometimes a little less likely
to explode with irritation. And then there's
three. The communication clinic. And this is
about talking. And listening. Really listening.
About routines. About expectations. About what's
bugging you. But remember. Don't be too negative
too often. Remember your partner also isn't a
mind reader, no matter how many decades you've
spent together. And my fourth tip, embrace the
new normal. Look, things change. Your rhythms
shift. There'll be moments where you want to
scream into a pillow, but there'll also be moments
of profound connection, of shared laughter, and
of discovering... new depths to your relationship.
And this wasn't always possible when you were
both caught in that daily grind. This isn't a
test to be passed or failed. It's an evolution.
It can be beautiful, it can be messy, often funny,
but it's a journey into the next chapter of your
lives together. Embrace the togetherness. Negotiate
the space. And remember why you fell in love
with that glorious, slightly irritating human
in the first place. Because honestly, who else
is going to share those 3pm gin and tonics with
you? Mr Kettle. Now, just finishing off the video.
What are you doing? It is about spending a lot
of time together when you're at home. Yeah, just
leave that. Hang on a couple of minutes. All
right, go. In a sec. Anyway, best leave it there
for today. And I'll see you next time. Don't
forget to let me know in the comments what tips
are for you in terms of getting on when getting
on is 24 hours. Cheers.