ever get that feeling, you know,
scrolling through Instagram and suddenly, bam,
you're drowning in love advice.
Five secrets to a perfect relationship,
three things your man should be doing.
It's like, come on.
So today, we're diving right into,
are we getting too much love advice these days?
We found this CNBC article and it's got us thinking.
It tackles this whole advice overload thing,
but then get this, it compares it to something from 1938.
1938, wow.
Right, an article from the Atlantic called
Love in America, who knew they were even worried
about this stuff back then?
Okay, so the CNBC article starts off
and it's basically saying what we all know,
relationship advice is everywhere,
but here's where it gets interesting.
They bring up this 1938 piece, Love in America,
totally different time, obviously.
Yeah, talk about a blast from the past.
Societal norms around love and marriage back then,
a whole different world, especially for women.
It's amazing to think about.
No kidding, it's like a time capsule, right?
But that's what's so wild, almost a century apart
and both articles are worried about the same thing,
all this love advice.
The 1938 one, they were worried that people were so caught up
in this idea of perfect love from movies, books,
that they were calling it quits too easily in real life.
It's like they were expecting a fairy tale ending
from day one and get this, there's this line
from the 1938 article that just stuck with me.
You cannot possibly feel cheerful when you see
the art of love, well, reduced to such automatic formulas.
Hmm, that's pretty insightful.
Right, it's like even back then,
they knew you couldn't just plug and play
when it came to love.
Exactly, and that's what makes this comparison so relevant
because that concern from 1938, it's still true today,
maybe even more so.
Following generic relationship advice,
like some kind of recipe, it can seriously backfire.
Every relationship is unique,
just like every person is unique.
There's no one size fits all solution.
It all comes back to knowing yourself, trusting your gut,
relying on your judgment instead of blindly following
someone else's advice.
It's like we're so busy listening to everyone else
tell us how to have a relationship,
we forget to figure out what we actually want,
and then there's that whole thing about the one, you know?
Like find your soulmate and all your problems
magically disappear, both articles talked about that too.
Oh yeah, that's a big one.
It's this idea that finding the one
is the be all and end all.
Like as if life is just some waiting room
until your soulmate shows up and then suddenly,
everything's perfect.
And don't get me wrong, finding someone special is amazing,
but it's about having a life outside of that too, right?
Absolutely, it's about being a whole person
with your own interests, passions.
Yes, your own things.
Don't lose yourself in the relationship, as they say.
You know, what gets me about this whole love advice thing,
it's not even just the amount of advice,
it's also what all that information does
to our expectations.
Oh, 100%.
We start comparing our relationships to everyone else's.
It's like everyone on Instagram
has this picture perfect love life,
and if yours doesn't look like that,
well, something must be wrong.
Exactly, we see the highlight real,
but not the behind the scenes,
and we end up with these unrealistic expectations,
thinking our relationship should be Instagram worthy 24 seven.
Which is impossible, right?
Right.
Relationships take work, they have ups and downs.
Exactly, and sometimes that raw honesty,
those real struggles,
that's what makes a relationship strong.
So how do we deal with all this then?
How do we tune out the noise
and figure out what actually matters?
It starts with you, knowing yourself.
Like what you want, what you value in a partner.
Right, what are your non-negotiables?
Think about, you wouldn't take financial advice
from someone who's bankrupt, would you?
Mm-hmm, good point.
So why take relationship advice from someone
just because they have a lot of Instagram followers?
It's like maybe we should be looking inward a little more,
trusting our own judgment.
Exactly, trust your gut.
Deep down, you already know what feels right,
we just gotta learn to listen to that voice again.
It's like we need to develop this love-advice filter.
Love that, it's about being selective,
taking what resonates, leaving what doesn't.
Right, not just blindly following
whatever everyone else is saying.
And here's the thing,
there's no one-size-fits-all in relationships.
What works for one couple might be a disaster for another.
Totally, we're all different people
with different needs and wants.
Exactly, so instead of trying to force yourself
into some cookie-cutter mold,
focus on what feels authentic to you and your partner.
Build something real.
Build something real, I like that.
Okay, so going back to those articles for a sec,
both of them pointed out another biggie,
the whole finding the one
will solve all your problems thing.
Oh yeah, that's a dangerous one.
Right, it's like find your soulmate,
and suddenly life is perfect,
which let's be honest, is not how it works.
Not even close.
Of course, a loving partner can bring
so much joy and support,
but it's dangerous to put that kind of pressure
on one person, to be your everything.
Exactly, it's about having a life outside
of your relationship too.
100%, having your own passions, your own friends,
your own sense of self.
It's funny though, because sometimes
it feels like all this love advice out there
actually makes it harder to do that,
to have your own life and a great relationship.
That's a really interesting point, how so?
Well, it's like all this advice,
it can be so focused on the doing,
do this, say that, go on this kind of date.
It's easy to get caught up in all that
and forget to just be yourself.
That's so true, we can get so caught up
in performing a relationship,
we forget to actually connect as real people.
Exactly, and that's where all the problems start, right?
When we're not being authentic,
when we're trying to force something
that's not really there.
It's like wearing a mask all the time.
Eventually you get tired of pretending.
And the relationship suffers.
So how do we avoid that?
How do we stay true to ourselves?
While also putting in the work
to have a healthy relationship?
That's the million dollar question, isn't it?
And honestly, I think it starts with self-awareness.
It really is, it's like before you can even begin
to build a healthy relationship with someone else,
you have to know who you are, what you want out of life.
Right, and maybe what you want in a partner too.
Exactly, and those wants, those needs,
they might change over time.
And that's okay, we're always growing, always evolving.
It's like that whole happily ever after thing.
It's not about finding someone who fits perfectly
into your life right now.
It's about finding someone who's willing to grow with you.
Yes, someone who challenges you, supports you,
and accepts you for who you are, even as you both change.
So I guess what we're saying is maybe the best love advice
isn't about following some strict set of rules.
Right, it's about tuning out all that external noise
and listening to your own inner voice.
Trusting your gut.
Exactly, it's your love story.
Right, your own rules, I love that.
And remember, there's no one right way to find love.
But there are a million ways to build a happy
and fulfilling life, whether you're single,
in a relationship, or still figuring things out.
So good, well said.
Well there you have it folks,
it's not about silencing all the love advice out there.
It's out there, that's for sure.
Oh, it's definitely out there.
But maybe it's more about like,
taking it all with a grain of salt.
A big grain.
Right, be open to learning,
but don't be afraid to trust your instincts too.
And remember, your relationship is unique.
Your journey is unique.
So go out there and write your own love story.