Hi, my name is Jordan. I am a special education
teacher from the UK. I share my passion for everything
communication, sensory regulation and fun lesson
ideas for my classroom of disabled pupils aged
4 to 11. Each week I am joined by experts in
the field answering your questions and sharing
our knowledge and experience working alongside
our beautiful young people. Let's get started.
Before we jump into this episode, I have a little
announcement. I am going on maternity leave in
autumn term, which is incredibly exciting. My
first child long awaited after 11 years. So yeah,
I'm really excited about it. But I hope that
means that you understand that this podcast is
just going on pause for a little while whilst
I adjust to motherhood and parent life. Hopefully
you understand that. So we've got some episodes
coming out all over August, but then we will
be pausing and we will be revisiting throughout
next year all of the amazing episodes. We've
only got 100 episodes from the previous few years
and then we'll be back after my maternity leave.
There's some fantastic episodes out there and
I'm sure you can't have listened to all of them.
So hopefully you still get something out of it.
This episode is a little bit different. I'm actually
the one being interviewed for this one. I thought
the last one of term, especially with this rounding
off before this break of mine, it'd be really
nice to be interviewed myself on my classroom,
my learners, my thoughts and feelings on SEND
and how the world is right now. So the lovely
people, Nathan at SEND Help. interviewed me and
posted that on his podcast and I allowed me to
share it online with you guys as well. So hopefully
it feels like a really lovely round off on my
thoughts and feelings just as I started this
podcast on episode one. I'd love you to stick
around. I'd love you to keep listening to the
wonderful experts. Keep reminding yourself of
these fabulous episodes. I'm so proud of this
podcast and I'm so grateful for you listening
every week. And yeah, please wish me luck. This
is a huge change and shift for me and one that
I'm really, really excited for. Without further
ado, let's get into the episode. Hello and welcome
to another episode of the Send Help podcast.
And today I've got a special guest today. You
might have seen her online and across Facebook
and Instagram. We've got Jordan from Our Sensory
Class. So it's going to be hopefully a great
episode. I'm sure it's going to be a great episode.
She's got lots to offer in the sense of experience
and what she's doing now through social media.
And so without butchering her journey, I'll introduce
you to Jordan and let her kind of say a bit about
where she comes from, what she's doing now, you
know, what she's got going on with businesses
and stuff. And yeah, so. Hey, it's Jordan. Yeah,
so my name's Jordan and I run Sensory Classroom
Limited or Sensory Class as you see on social
media. I'm ultimately a special education teacher.
and have been for 16 plus years now. I started
as a supply teaching assistant whilst I was doing
my acting degree. I always wanted to be a drama
teacher, actually, in secondary school, maybe
in secondary school. That's what I thought I
wanted to be. But I took some kind of ad hoc
hours whilst I was doing my degree for a bit
of teaching experience. I thought, well, what's
better to prepare you to be a teacher than teaching
and supply TAing in a special needs school? And
I was absolutely right, but I very quickly fell
in love with it. And within my first year of
my degree, I completed... switched what I wanted
to work towards and I wanted to be a special
needs teacher so I worked in a school in that
school for 10 years I was a TA and then I became
a teacher in that same school working with pupils
aged 3 to 19 with complex severe learning disabilities
a range of different diagnosis and needs which
was such a great experience. And then more recently,
seven years ago, I moved to Cornwall and worked
in, it was actually a mainstream school, but
had specialist provision attached to it. So I
had much more autonomy on how I did things. And
that was where I really experimented with. how
I wanted to do it in that kind of neuro affirming
way and really experimented with what that looked
like and what that could be and then in between
times I was also a disabilities foster carer
as well through emergency placements long -term
placement and respite placements all children
with disabilities for the most part and lots
of trauma as well so I kind of have a very wide
range of experience, I suppose. And maybe that's
why my social media blew up very quickly the
way it did when I started two years ago, because
I could kind of relate to the parent side of
things, the teacher side of things, the Sanko
side of things, the foster care kind of side
of things and kind of, yeah, reach everybody
really. And also, I think it's just a sign of
the times that people are just desperate for
some kind of ideas that are done in a passionate
and loving way. And that's always, that was why
I started really. I was looking on social media
for you know, special education ideas and things.
And all I could see was, I think it was meant
with love, but it was kind of felt mocking or
like making fun of or even like glorifying, hurting
behaviours, glorifying how challenging the job
was, showing bruises and bites and mess in the
classroom. And I just didn't like it. It just
didn't sit comfortably with me. For me, that
wasn't the reality of the job that I was in.
I adore my job. I adore my kids. We have so much
fun. And that just wasn't my reality. I couldn't
find anything, any teacher out there showing
my reality that it's so fun and so full of love
and colour and laughter and joy. And we're always
behind a locked door. Nobody can ever see what
we actually get up to. Not even those teachers
that I work next to saw what we were doing because
we were literally behind a locked door. So that's
where I started filming some ideas because, yeah,
I wanted to share my reality of how awesome this
job is. No, that's brilliant. I mean, well, first
thing I'm going to say is how do you get time
to do anything? It sounds like you're busy constantly.
It was that. Last year I was - And then I was
just doing foster caring and you're like, whoa.
I am a bit like that. So I am neurodivergent
myself. So I think that helps. When I see a need
out there, I just find the energy and time and
capacity to fill that need. I just think that's
part of - the beautiful part of being neurodivergent.
So that does help. But also I, yeah, last year
was absolutely crazy. It's calmed down a little
bit more this year, but last year I was running
two classrooms. I was also running my growing
startup business and it was all happening over
the top of each other. So that last year was
absolutely crazy. My husband will say I didn't
sleep. It was mental. This year, since September,
I've stepped out of the classroom and I'm focusing
much more on business and consultancy. I'm still
linked with schools. I still go into schools
and work with children, but I don't have my own
classroom. And that for me has made it possible
to make this sustainable because last year I
couldn't have done it for a second year. It was
absolutely crazy. So yeah, I don't want teachers
thinking that they're watching me and thinking,
how does she do it all? I wish I could do that.
It isn't reality for more than a year, honestly.
So it's quite good to hear from your side of
why you got into it because I've never really
heard of it. Obviously, I know why I got into
my social media side of it, but it's good that
you kind of saw. How did you feel the social
media with the teachers and stuff? Because I
think you're right in a lot of it is glorifying
the bad bits and how stressful it is. And I'm
not saying it's not stressful. It absolutely
is in some areas. But there wasn't very many
people like you that are coming out with the
whole positive approach. And I suppose, especially
I know from social media, that's a lot harder
to get a following because people are more attracted
to the negative posts and stuff like that. To
get a following before already just shows you.
It definitely does. Yeah, I've dabbled into it
a few times. almost like opposing the negative
comments and they always get more comments and
things so if you're after engagement and to grow
your following then yeah go for it but I'm not.
I'm here for advocacy and sharing the reality.
So many parents of SEND children have their children
in mainstream because they're terrified and have
no idea what special education can look like.
There's a kind of idea that it's an institution,
that it's harmful, that it is strict and that
children don't have autonomy. And actually, that's
not my reality. It may be in some settings. And
I'm also trying really hard to educate. those
settings, how different it could be. But it's
certainly not the reality in my setting. My setting
is full of songs and color and laughter and joy
and all of my teaching assistants just adore
the kids to their absolute bones. And I just
want, if parents could see that. then they would
jump at the chance of their children being in
these settings and wouldn't maybe wait longer
than is necessary to make that call. And same
for teachers and SENCOs as well. They work so
hard, so passionately about these children they
absolutely love in mainstream, trying to keep
them there. And that isn't always best for the
learners. And I just think if they could see
what we can offer, then those that... can access
it and are able to access it which is getting
harder and harder and harder like there's the
filters are getting much smaller the parameters
are getting much more strict on who can be in
a special education school if a learner is able
to I would hate for the barrier to their access
being the adults in their care so yeah that's
another passion of mine is The adults around
the child understanding what special education
can actually offer and how much love and joy
and understanding there really is within the
setting rather than it being institution because
that just isn't my reality. It's very hard, isn't
it? Because I've got mixed reality when it comes
to this as well through my various job roles.
And my favourite job was working in a school
with the most challenging kids with autism and
learning disabilities. And I was only there because
the other schools couldn't take them because
of the challenging behaviour. But it was great.
And as you said, my reality was... We got them
to do kind of anything through having the resources
and the time, the patience, the staff levels.
And it was just great. And I think as I've got
older, it's just got further and further and
further and further away from that. And I don't,
so what's, how come, what do you think the difference
is? How come there is some still that are still
far behind in their approach compared to like
you that seems to be very, well, yours seems
to be right. I mean, like look at your videos
and stuff. It seems to be just the right way
to do it. And it's like very hard to then understand
why there is schools out there that are so. and
to doing that approach? I guess there's three
reasons. One is just training and understanding.
If they've only ever been trained in ABA approaches
and that's all they know, so applied behaviour
analysis approaches, then they are the kind of
institutionalised, non -neurofirming practices.
And that's going to cause some controversy that
I've said that, but I'm quite passionate about
that. Sometimes that's all teachers are taught.
or professionals are taught, schools are taught.
So if they know no different, then they know
no better. So that's one problem. The other problem
is lack of staff and lack of budget. Without
the adults, without the space, without the resources,
it's really hard to offer all these fun and exciting
things. That was another reason why I started
social media was to literally fund my classroom.
I wanted to do all of the fun things and we didn't
have the school budget. I had to beg, borrow
and steal for blue sticks. Like it was... It's
dire. I've never worked before the last couple
of years where the lighting and electricity budget
has been mentioned to me as a teacher. It's dire.
The budget at the moment is really dire. I mean,
it was a privilege that I could very quickly
earn a living through social media. And it literally
did fund my classroom in that first year. Everything
went back into it. Every T -shirt sale, everything
went back into it. So that I could pay for the
fun slime and jelly and constant corn flour and
flour and glitter and all of those things that
I wanted and the children needed. I mean, some
of it went on nappy bags and gloves. So basic
needs for our classroom and lots of that went
back into it. So that was another reason why
I started. So budget. I think people, some teachers
must look at my account and think, yeah, great
for you. But, you know, I've got a glue stick,
some pencils and some paper. Like, how am I going
to make that work? So lots of what I try and
share is, you know, free stuff that you might
have already around the classroom or in the school.
And I'm going more and more that route because
I'm aware that it's more and more of a problem.
And the other thing is just fear. Fear about
letting go of those rules and that strict regime.
And the fear of what happens if I let the kids
lead? What happens if I give them autonomy? Because
in their mind, whenever that's happened, it's
caused dysregulation. It's caused a chaos. I
suppose in their mind, that's what they're perceiving.
But actually, it's like a muscle. The more you
do it, the more the learners and adults feel
comfortable in it. Then actually, it's just incredibly
beautiful. And it leads to consent so that you
know the children want to be. There it leads
to children listening to their bodies or learners,
I shouldn't say children, some of these are adults,
right? Learners listening to their bodies on
what feels right for them and what feels comfortable
to them and leaving when it doesn't feel comfortable.
Honouring their autonomy is just massive and
that just wasn't happening before. Being learner
-led, so following their special interests and
their interests leads to such... better learning
opportunities and we've got the privilege of
being able to do that in special education when
we've got more adults and and more time and more
just freedom to be able to bend the curriculum
around the learners that we've got in any year
so i think there's a few reasons why it isn't
happening fear training budget But all of those
are compatible if you want them to be. I chose
to have less adults and reduce lots of different
things that normally would be provided in the
budget so that I could. create a specialist curriculum
I a lot of my own time and effort into creating
that sensory curriculum which I now offer as
a product to other schools so that they can have
it accessible and affordable for them in fact
all of my products I would say are incredibly
affordable for schools because I know that it's
really hard to get these ideas to get this time
uh yeah create this bespoke sensory fun curriculum.
And that really is my passion is to try and make
it accessible to schools so that they can move
away from this strict institutionalized behavior
analysis approach model and more to one that's
flexible and neuroaffirming. really shocking
to hear like kind of well i kind of expected
it but it's here to hear like how much you had
to fund to make that possible and in obviously
situations wouldn't make that much sense in if
obviously financially if you didn't have social
media as i feel like it would have been a shame
what if in a mainstream setting what do you think
do you think the lead tables have too much to
do with this because i i from my understanding
isn't it that you get but it's not so much about
the budget not being there but if the budget's
not allocated for that resource it's not you're
not going to find it There's a couple of things.
So we need to make sure that EHCPs are written
well and that are actually appropriate for the
child that we've got in the classroom right now.
So many of them are so outdated that actually
the child has changed in the time that they've
been written. So we're not getting the appropriate
budget for the child. The other is making sure
that we're constantly moderating and proving
with paperwork and proof and data that a child
needs more support because our biggest... Budget
cost is adults and mainstream, all mainstream
schools will agree that, you know, you need the
adults on the ground. Otherwise, it's not even
safe, let alone children learning. And that is
a huge cost to schools. And so often it isn't
covered by the EHCP or the funding that comes
in because of lack of time to be able to gather
the huge amounts of data. I mean, it's like a
book, this thing that we use to gather for to
prove that our children are needing more budget
and more support. I feel like that's the main
barrier is time for the Sankos and teachers to
do that and gather that data to fight that cause
because they're on the ground, you know, doing
free people's jobs, you know, where it's like
the chicken and the egg, you know, you're doing
free people's jobs because you haven't got the
budget for more adults, but you can't get more
adults because you haven't got time to then moderate
and make sure the paperwork is accurate. We're
kind of in a lose -lose cycle at the moment in
special schools and mainstream schools, I would
say, and probably alternative provisions as well.
You know, it's all about the time it takes to
prove this need. I've never had one denied, though.
So as long as you can put in, you know, the time
to gather all of this paperwork, it is there.
It's just, yeah, I mean, it's time that we often
just don't have. Yeah. For what I can see as
well, with the fear, obviously, from the white
paper and stuff coming out as well, is that a
lot of kids that would mainly go over to schools
like yours are now maybe not going to qualify
to go to schools like yours. But then without
them, again, if the budgets are going to remain
the same and there's no actual funding going
into it, then you're kind of in a worse situation
going forward, aren't you? Than you would be
now, which is a shame because there is so many...
like I wouldn't say so many there is places but
especially yours that are coming up that are
showing all of this progress and what a specialist
school can like and it's almost like the parents
must be like feeling sick kind of like they're
without hope kind of thing and then like but
what if and what what does that mean so like
I'm not I mean what do you think how do you think
I don't know I mean where do you think what do
you think about all of that and where do you
think that the kids The children that we always
let down have got to be let down even more, which
is the in -betweeners. So those that can cope
in mainstream really well, regardless of diagnosis
and need, those that can cope in mainstream really
well and that suit that level and that learning
style suits them will continue to do well. Those
that have severe medical needs, I hope, will
still have their special education place. But
we've always had this in -betweener group. Yeah.
They're not capable enough to access mainstream,
how it is built. But they're not special enough.
They're not, you know, they've not got access
to, for whatever reason, maybe their behavior
is too challenging. I've had that before with
foster children that I've looked after. Their
behavior is too challenging. They're too dangerous
to be around the special needs children or more
vulnerable children. Or maybe they haven't got,
they don't qualify the medical needs or they
don't qualify for the severe learning disability
label. for whatever reason, then they're left
out of the special education settings and that's
going to happen more and more. And then what
we're left with is this cohort that doesn't fit
anywhere. And this is the cohort that have always
been let down and are going to be continued to
be let down by this white paper. They're the
kids that are educated in corridors and cupboards
and at home, honestly, like parents are just
completely let down by the entire system. And
we need a better answer for these kids than exclusion.
And that's what's happening. Some children are
lucky enough to get 15 hours in an alternative
provision. And that is the maximum that they
can get. That's the legal maximum, is 15 hours
a week in an alternative provision. Some of them
get EOTAS, which is educated alternatively or
outside of education. But they're incredibly
expensive packages and really hard to get, which
often takes a lot of time and support from outsourced.
places that parents have to often fund privately
which just isn't possible for everybody and you
know these huge cohort which is growing massively
having are not having their educational needs
met not having their safety needs met not having
their emotional needs met you know and yeah it's
just it's just not good enough and the white
paper is absolutely not going to help that no
no and yeah no it is is does make you worry doesn't
it the situations that we're seeing now and then
seeing what that white paper might do I had 10
or 11 children at one point in my special education
class that was linked to a mainstream school.
But I could have filled my classroom three times
over with those that are in mainstream, that
had a diagnosis, that had an EHCP, but didn't
have that qualify for that specialist setting.
The in -betweeners, if you will. But actually,
the in -betweeners are becoming more and more
complex. Like lots of them are in pads. Lots
of them are non -speaking. Lots of them couldn't
access the classroom in any way for any of their
lessons. It was totally inappropriate. The TAs
were incredible. loved them made it work luckily
by us being attached to the mainstream school
there was a lot of inclusion as far as they came
to us inclusion rather than our kids coming to
mainstream inclusion I mean that was the benefit
of us being attached to them they came to our
swimming and our PE and our play times and some
of our literacy you know but they weren't accessing
special education like it should be accessed
you know some of these in -betweeners that we're
talking about are non -speaking are in pads are
incredibly complex and yet still don't qualify
and I just feel like that's just only going to
get worse and what that's going to affect is
their own education but it's also going to affect
all the other mainstream pupils who could learn
in that setting education too because that isn't
inclusion for anyone. Inclusion in my mind means
belonging. They don't belong in those classrooms
because the classrooms aren't made for them.
It's totally unsafe for everybody. It doesn't
mean it's not possible. It just is possible with
the right training and the right budgets and
everything they're promising. And I'm going to
wait to see if that is the reality. Honestly,
I really hope it is. I really hope that. occupational
therapists and speech and english therapists
and teacher training happen and i really hope
that budgets are allocated properly to all children
that require it within mainstream schools i hope
that spaces and resources are offered that are
appropriate to to have true inclusion true belonging
for these learners within mainstream school that's
awesome i just will believe it when i see it
So you've touched on it about challenging behaviour
of children as well. And I speak to a lot of
parents that children would be in that bracket.
What happens to them? Because there seems to
be nowhere that would even accept them at the
moment. And I feel like it's so cruel in the
sense of, I don't believe very many of these
children would have started off like this. They're
let down by the system. Lots of environmental
changes have happened. And then, as you said,
they're punished, they're punished, they're punished.
But it seems like they're not fracturing in any
kind of... I don't know if you're speaking about
it. It's like if you're, there seems to be rules
still in a sense of support. Often you get the
support unless, if you're too distressed and
you don't. And then what do you get then? Yeah,
it's almost like you wait until it's already,
the system's already failed before you're then
putting in intervention. Because there is certain
scores. for children with behavior that challenges
for sure but often they have to be at such an
extremely failed point in their education to
access that but it's almost really too late they've
got so much education trauma by that point i'll
talk about my foster child actually we had him
for 10 months and he was 10 when he came to us
he'd already been to seven schools and expelled
from seven schools He was a child that came with
incredible trauma, but also a diagnosis of autism
and self -harmed and had lots of hurting behaviors
to himself and was a danger to himself. And that
was a fear for lots of schools that they couldn't
keep him safe was their reasoning. Ultimately,
I think he scared them and he was just a boy
crying out to. be loved and accepted and he would
do these behaviors to test them to see if they
were solid to see that they weren't going to
run away like everybody else you know let him
down like everybody else and when he was with
us within those 10 months he had a school placement
for three weeks and which is actually a special
education settings placement too and it lasted
three weeks and they said we can't meet his needs
he keeps saying that he's going to hurt himself
that he wants to die and we just don't feel like
we can keep him safe and All he was doing, you
know, when we say behavior is communication,
I know he was saying he wanted to die. What he
was really saying is, show me you're not going
to let me down. That's what his behavior was
saying. You know, I'm going to be as awful as
I can be just to prove that you're solid and
not going to let me down. And ultimately, it
was just his eighth school that let him down.
And then there was no other placements for him
left in our local area. And then he had to leave
our home too. So not only did he lose his school
setting, he lost his home. And I don't even know
where he is now. He's in his 20s now. I don't
know how many education settings he's been to
and have failed him. And every time he's failed,
it's just evidence in his mind that nobody wants
him. Nobody's going to stick out. Nobody's going
to be around for him, to truly see him and accept
him for everything he is. I hate the word good
and bad, but like all the colors of him, they
weren't accepting. And there were so many stories.
He had an AHCP. He was completely failed by the
system in so many ways. But there are so many
stories of him. And I think early intervention,
if he was four or five in his first school and
he wasn't let down in that way, if he was. resiliently
and rebelliously loved and accepted and in in
all the ways in that school it wouldn't get to
the point where he had to prove these things
because the proof to him and the evidence would
have been there for him right from the start
and some mainstream schools do that incredibly
well in that been done amazingly that they just
love resiliently and rebelliously these these
children with such complex needs and they have
no budget they have no time they have no space
they have no training But they are just putting
in, I mean, that's half of my following, honestly.
They're filing me out and seeking me out and
using their own personal budget and money to
fund these things because they adore these kids
so much and they just don't want to let them
down. But the system shouldn't be relying on
the goodwill of these people that love these
kids. And it is like, gosh, without the goodwill
of teaching assistants that are on minimum wage
and Sankos that are working ridiculous hours
a week. The system would have failed way more
than we're seeing now. Decades ago, we are on
the backs of these people that are just trying
to do the best of the kids with the absolute
limited resources that they could ever have.
And that's getting less and less and less and
less. It's not good. It seems to be played with
at the moment as well with the politicians and
stuff like that, isn't it? It's just a, yeah,
we'll do this, we'll do this. All these promises
or not promises depending on their stance on
Sen. And it's just, it's more than just, again,
it's turned into Sen epidemic, I'd like to call
it. It's more like a pandemic, isn't it? Like
of what's going on is. filtering into everywhere
the fact that even politicians have that as a
main party piece that they're either saying that
they don't believe in it and they're not going
to fund all this extra money going there or some
of them are saying yeah we will and we really
support it and that's splitting the wet like
the england's that that to me is crazy like you've
got you've got to the point now that regular
people have got such an opinion about sending
kids i think it's outrageous i always go back
to when i was 11 when i got diagnosed and i would
say it was safer then it wasn't much better i
didn't know much about it but it was safer because
people had the preconceived notion he was a naughty
child and left you alone that was it they might
say it to your face or whatever but nowadays
people make it their mission to go against again
parties are going against how much money they're
going to spend on saying how much they're going
to go against it and you're thinking and i'm
as you know we speak to families all the time
and they're at bits and i'm thinking what are
they not seeing like what are you It's just too
easy to villainize the vulnerable, the voiceless,
like the literal voiceless and the timeless.
Like the carers of these non -speaking learners,
this really important community as part of our
country, are voiceless because they haven't got
the time capacity or literal communication needs
to be able to voice them. I mean, what an easy
cohort to blame for all our problems. And there
are other cohorts that they're vandalising too
in a similar way that are voiceless in other
ways. And it's just too easy rather than blaming
those that just aren't paying their taxes. But
they're the ones that can pay to not have that
in the papers. And it's really sad. And I think
if you're unsure on who to vote for, unsure on
who to support, then maybe think about, OK, well,
maybe I'm not voting for me. Maybe I'm voting
for the voiceless or those that don't have the
time or capacity to go to protests, to do the
research because they're on the ground, like,
doing the hard work, these carers, you know,
or they are adults with learning disabilities
that will never get to vote for their needs and
actually it's really affecting them most. Maybe
vote with them in mind instead. You know, if
you're not sure, who would they want to vote
for? And research in that way. You know, I'm
not going to tell you who to vote for, but...
If you're thinking with that in mind, then I
would feel like you could, you know, sleep at
night knowing that you've done a good thing for
a really important community as part of our country.
Does it surprise you how much people have got
on board with their opinions on it? And does
it surprise you how much they are, like, send
kids are getting attacked? It shocks me. People
are talking about it full stop, regardless of
what, you know. position or opinion they've got
it's good that it is in the main media is really
like that never happened before it's good that
people are talking about it because it gives
the opportunity for them to hear my side and
the sides of of those actual neurodivergent people
autistic people adults with disabilities you
know they're being heard they're being spoken
to in main media it's really important The only
problem with social media, though, is it ends
up like an echo chamber. So you're only hearing
what you are thinking and you're only hearing
from people that have the same opinions of you.
So for me and you being in this space, in this
neuroaffirming, passionate space, we're probably
hearing lots, you know, of things that make us
either feel passionate against it or for it.
We're hearing that. That's not the reality for
lots of people. I actually had my Instagram go
down for three months earlier this year and I
started a new account to a backup account. And
it was really interesting being on a brand new
Instagram account that knew nothing about me.
I was being fed so many different things that
I never even saw. I never even knew people had
these opinions. I never even knew that people
were being fed these lies and they were really
convincing. And that really worried me because
I didn't see that. I was in my happy little bubble
of passionate send parents and carers and teachers
and advocates and allies and adults that were
all saying the same thing. And all of a sudden
I was being met with the reality that actually
that's quite a minority that are thinking that
honestly. And actually it just made me more passionate
about making my voice louder and sharing to try
and like burst that bubble so that those that
actually need to hear it, hear it. And I don't
know if I'm getting there, but, you know, between
me and a lot of other accounts like ours, Nate,
I really hope that some of them penetrate through
to those that actually need to hear it and that
hear how important this community is for our
country. You know, I just think that that's ultimately
what it comes down to. It's such an ableist view
that these learners and these adults aren't valuable.
And it's just simply not true. No. Different
ways. And if we can share a little bit of that.
then it might help. I hope it does. It's really
crazy, isn't it? I'm very paranoid about algorithms
anyway. So I know that they're manipulating me
every time I watch one and I know it's my fault
that it's there. But it still gets you, doesn't
it? You are going to find videos that you want
to watch and that opinion. So it was really weird
for me when I went through this because mine
was sort of set up on a comedy basis. So I did.
I had the light heart of it. People kind of similar
to me to say how it is day to day. The practical
stuff, the words and stuff like that. Very lighthearted.
I then had something go wrong with Calvin's school
and it took me to a different place. What happened
was, because I started writing about the school
this and then I can't believe they've done that,
blah, blah, blah. I then went into a following
of, is that like petitions? And I went into a
war and it was like... a very dark, horrible
place of the internet that I didn't know existed
where these people, either side of it, you've
got people that, because it's just a fight, but
it's so like, instead of like we have our, we
get so used to the, like the agreement of our
community, isn't it? That you don't realise that
outside of that, you've got people just literally
at war with each other. Yeah, it's so easy to
think that 99 % of people are passionate about
this community that feel the same that I do,
that they're really important and really valuable
and valued and loved. And, you know, and that
isn't the reality, which is why. We're seeing
what we're seeing in the media, in the mainstream
media, because that isn't the reality. That isn't
what the majority think. And it is up to us to
voice that, you know, to combat the myths that
just simply aren't true. I saw something the
other day that said, oh, how come there's so
many people with ADHD now? And then the answer
was so perfect. It's by Dr. Jen on social media.
The answer is so perfect. They said the same
reason there was more stars when the telescopes
were invented. We're just better at seeing it.
We're better at recognizing ADHD in girls and
boys that look different than the stereotypical.
Same for autism. You know, that's why there's
not more stars. They were always there. We can
just see them more clearly. And that's the answer.
And if we're saying that, if we're sharing that,
if we're loaded with facts and research, evidence
-based research to combat there. hateful opinions
on this lovely amazing innocent community that
haven't done anything they want nothing more
than just their basic needs met too let's just
say that you know their benefits cover not even
their basic needs oh yeah you'd think we'd get
policies from that It doesn't even scratch the
sides of what their needs are. Talk to any SEND
parent and they will say how expensive it is
to be a carer of a child with disabilities. It
doesn't scratch the sides. They will laugh at
you if you think, if you even mention that they
are making money from this. It is absurd. It
is so not true. And it's just laughable that
some people genuinely think that. Yeah, it is.
And it's hard not to keep fighting that, isn't
it? I stay away from my comment section in that
sense. If it gets like a bit of a vile video,
I don't, you know, I've already responded to
the first like a lot of them. I don't, because
they do, it gets you. And it does get you to
believe anything that everyone thinks like that.
And it's hard to remain in our bubble, isn't
it, of what we're doing and then kind of hoping.
And as I said, yours is even more amazing because
I do go off the cusp. I do say things like sometimes
I get angry, sometimes it comes across where
yours is. very much so about look what we can
achieve look what we can it's consistent i do
i really do and and sometimes i question whether
that's the right thing honestly if i should speak
more and voice more because people will think
maybe i'm complacent about some of these big
issues so it's nice to be able to have the opportunity
here to be on a long form format to be able to
explain fully because in 90 seconds on a social
media video you can't explain fully what you
mean and in proper context and things so this
is a really lovely opportunity to have actually
but it's really again it's hard on social media
to put that that opinion across in in 90 seconds
in a full well -rounded well -researched way
it isn't possible so i do tend to stick to sharing
the love sharing the acceptance sharing the joy
to try and bring up people with me rather than
fear and also i think parents and teachers are
constantly being bombarded with hate fear misunderstanding
even the schools themselves and every time they
pick up their child from school which i've had
as well as foster carer they did this again they
bit this person again you know they're constantly
being told that their child isn't accepted and
you know their needs aren't being met you know
and they're not being understood constantly so
i thought it might account can be the light on
their phone that does understand their children,
that does validate and celebrate their children,
that understands the why, that is passionate
about songs and colour and love and connection
and co -regulation, all of those things. And
I hope that it will give them some light to come
to, a bit of light relief from the burden, not
of their children, but of the burden of the failures
of the system that doesn't understand their children.
And that is what happened. And maybe that's why
I grew so quick because all of a sudden people
were like, oh, thank goodness. Something that
I know I can scroll and not be triggered by.
Something that I can scroll and just feel warm
and love through the screen. And that isn't what
I was looking for before I started the account.
And I couldn't find it. There's lots of accounts
that do it now. And over the last couple of years,
I've seen a huge wealth of accounts come up.
There's shops and accounts that have incredible
communities. And maybe I just wasn't searching
the right things. That's why I couldn't find
them. there's incredible loving accepting communities
there they're incredibly passionate about our
community that are doing wonderful things you
know it's definitely not just me there's there's
a lot I would say that that could be your influence
though so your influence has caused all these
I would say so that it wasn't that it might not
have been there you started it and you started
and that's how good your influence is that you've
influenced so many people now to have that outlook
and to start showing it in that positive light
yeah maybe I hope so or maybe it's the algorithm
that is like feeding more of what I'm giving
out I don't know but It certainly feels good
to share good rather than the opposite. Because
hate just breeds hate and yeah, love breeds love.
And that is what I'm getting back. And I really
don't see many negative comments. I certainly
see people disagreeing with me and I'm always
okay with that. I want that, you know, I want
to educate people. Sometimes it's just ignorance
and lack of understanding and training. It's
not hate. So that's kind of the most I get really,
which is nice. It protects me from that as well.
This is a personal thing for me, being neurodivergent
myself. I was failed at school too. Had an awful
time at secondary school. As a neurodivergent
woman that only got diagnosed in the mid -30s,
you know, completely failed and misunderstood
by the system as a whole. And in work placements
even worse, actually, I would say than school.
And I think lots of adults can share that. that
complete misunderstanding and unfair parameters
and unfair expectations on somebody that has
a disability and has those needs. So it is personal,
but also like I've loved like 600 kids with disabilities.
So it's personal in that sense too, you know,
I'm fighting them too. Yeah, no, it is good.
And as I said, I've made a respect for you because
it is the hardest way to grow an audience is
by being that positive, shiny light. And it is,
and I know that full well. And again, it put
me back in a lane going over to the... things
i went back to humor so i've just tried to assume
i just reality just how it is without any too
much thing about it and i feel so much safer
as you said for the comment section that everything
i'm not arguing or getting triggered and it's
great that you kind of grow that community together
isn't it like what with what have you found on
social media like what i was surprised about
was how many people are actually in crisis And
that's real facts, isn't it? Like the statistics
are out there. I don't think people realise.
I know we all say it on social media, but it's
different to people saying like influencing on
social media. These are people that are never
going to go on social media. And there is so
many people in crisis that have a story. You
can literally have millions. Like if you think
there's enough, there's too many social media
influencers at the moment, you're lucky. Because
if every single parent that was going through
something at the moment picked up their phone
and started speaking about it, my God. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah, every class would have three in the
whole of the world. And that's just dysregulation
crisis I'm talking about. I'm not talking about
not having their emotional needs met, not having
their, like, not having a safe home to go back
to. You know, yeah, it's a huge need. You know,
if you could look at all of the, we use it as
CPOMs, but like the trackers of... any behaviors
or concerns around a child if you could see how
many go in every day that are built up It's shocking.
And as a foster carer as well, we used to get
eight referrals a day for different children
if we could take them. Eight a day. We were on
the outskirts of London at that time. So maybe
that's why it was more. But I don't think so.
I think that's nationwide. There's eight children
that are needing an emergency place because they
are not safe in the house that they are in. And
they don't take children away easily. It takes
a long time to be brought to foster care. And
there is, you know, in crisis, you know, there
are so many in crisis. There are teachers in
crisis that are really passionate about their
job, that worked really hard to get the career
they've got, that are leaving. And there were
stats this week, actually, that the teachers
leaving are aged between 25 and 35 and are mainly
women. And lots of it was around maternity leave
and questioning that. But also it's about burnout.
You know, you can only love and be passionate
for so long and see it fail over and over and
over again and not get anywhere. Without ultimately
just thinking, I can't do this anymore. There's
only so much fight that we've got. And when you're
working in a failing system that's not changing,
it's only getting worse. It's really hard to
keep the motivation to carry on. Yeah, I can
imagine. It is no short of, I can imagine how
hard it is being a teacher, let alone now with
this. And that's just without a sense. So just
as a teacher, as it was, from what I know, from
what I've heard from teachers, the pressure,
the expectation, the fact that you don't, especially
in mainstream, when you have little... to no
freedom to change anything you want to. And you
could also get, you put your job at risk for
appeasing, send kids. There's lots of politics
to it, isn't it? And I see a lot of the same
of parents that are, when they first get, I spoke
to a head teacher of a school, not, I don't mind
the podcast, but it wasn't her. I don't want
to fire her out to make it, it wasn't that one,
but I spoke to another head teacher and she was
very naive to the fact and thought we was kind
of like being on like problematic. And then her
daughter. had send needs and she could not and
still doesn't and makes it a mission now to make
sure that everyone knows at high level how bad
it is and she just couldn't believe it and she
said that it just seems when you're hearing it
it just seems so unreal And so you just, you
can't process it. It's a bit like, you know,
any major event when you like, you kind of know
it, like, like one of the world wars, you kind
of read it in books, but you don't actually,
it wasn't there. So you don't actually know how
horrific that was. Like, it's almost like. It's
really sad, isn't it? Because actually the reality
is if these learners and children were supported
properly, there would be no crisis. It's not
because of the children. It's because of their
needs or disabilities or how they communicate
or how they interact with the world. It isn't
on them at all. It is through the failures of
the county, the budgets, the education system,
the medical care system, the therapists. It's
failures of the entire system around this child
and their families as to why they're in crisis.
It is nothing to do with. The child, you know,
with the right budgets and resources, these children
would be thriving in education and in every other
sector. Without doubt, you know, I've worked,
like I said, I've worked with 600 children, probably
more now. I worked that out a couple of years
ago. And that's not including my social media,
you know. I've reached a lot of families. And
I've never worked with one child that doesn't
want to learn, want to communicate, want to play,
want to build relationships ultimately. They're
just being failed in every way. And families
are being failed too. Yeah, so I want to make
that really clear that when we're talking about
crisis, it isn't crisis because they're disabled.
It is bad because they've been failed. And as
you said, every step they're getting failed,
aren't they? Do you think, what do you think
caused this? Because I've got like a theory that,
it's a kind of happy theory because it's better
than the one that they're doing it deliberately,
but that they just underestimated how many children.
So one, I think when it first come out, autism,
and especially because when I worked, going up
the years in care and working in schools, I think
autism was tied to a learning disability. And
I think they thought. autism was just learning
disability. And if without learning disability,
there'll be no such thing as autism. So they
had a Spurges, didn't they? They kind of justified
that, but they didn't really. So with ADHD, it
was boys and there was no such thing as adult
ADHD and there was no such thing as girls. And
they're going back on all of this and realizing
that it's through families. I've just done a
video today. If you've got a kid with SEND, the
chances of one of the parents having it is 94%.
That seems and seems what we're in now, isn't
it? As you said about the middle type of people,
that means that we're missing a whole lot of
people. When I first started teaching, even the
National Autistic Society said one in 100 were
autistic. Jesus. Where I don't know what the
National Autistic Society say now, but I've seen
evidence based research to suggest it's more
like one in four. And I just find that really
interesting. You know, that's a huge change in
just 16 years, maybe even in the last five years.
But yeah, definitely in 16 years, I remember
those. And again, it's like the stars in the
telescope. It's not that they weren't always
there. It's just they weren't. You weren't seeing,
was it? As I said, you wasn't looking for them.
So if you're not looking for that... ADHD looks
like in women and adults. And when we understand
what autism can look like in this huge... I mean,
autism is such a huge umbrella that covers such
a huge, wide range of needs and experiences that
the more we understand about what that looks
like, the more also, I think maybe, the better
we have technology and understanding to support.
these learners communicate they're now becoming
adults so we're 10 years into augmentative and
alternative methods of communication for these
adults that wouldn't have necessarily had a voice
before they're able to tell us what their experiences
are we're learning from them therefore our understanding
is deepening, broadening, becoming richer, which
is great because people are understanding themselves
so much better. I certainly understood myself
so much better when I received that report. And
so did my family. I was always loved and supported
by my family, but it made a big difference having
that report. It's not necessarily even about
the label, although that's really important because
that opens doors too. But just having that validation
from a professional to say, this is why you struggle
in these areas. This is why you thrive in these
areas. This is the support. you need it was really
helpful to share that with my family and my friends
and and work so that I was understood and I found
that really helpful so the more and I definitely
would have been diagnosed 10 years ago it wasn't
understood at all so I think those yeah as we're
understanding what it actually looks like and
what the impact of that can be on a person then
we're gonna see more people with this diagnosis
and we're gonna see more people needing support
Yeah, I'd like to say we've already won. So as
you said, it went from 1 to 100 to 1 to 4. And
I'd like to say that they've understood it so
much that there's three quarters of us, or at
least half. I'll take half. I'll take half of
the classroom, them having to say half the people
in the room have got it now. Yeah, it's really
interesting, isn't it? Because that was just
autism. So yeah, talking about neurodivergence.
If you're talking about SEND in a whole, you're
very close to one half of a classroom, aren't
you? I don't know the figures, but it would be
likely, wouldn't it? And also then talking about
emotional regulation needs, support at home needs,
you know. If you could do all of them, I'd pretty
much say, yeah, because I think it's an average
about, in all SEND needs, I think it's about
a quarter of a class now. it could be like dyslexia
and stuff like that i think teachers would agree
with half have some emotional support need kind
of trauma need or ascend diagnosis or both yeah
teachers certainly in my mainstream school i've
been just been attached to was really eye -opening
because i'd spent 10 years in special education
not really knowing or understanding what was
really happening in mainstream just thinking
that we had all the all of them with us it was
so eye -opening and i'm really pleased i had
that experience being attached to a mainstream
school to really see We absolutely didn't. There
is so much need in mainstream, not just disability,
not just STEM, but yeah, huge emotional need,
huge anxiety, lots of trauma around education,
but also around families and early experiences.
Teachers are wearing a hell of a lot of hats.
And I feel like the education system isn't just
the ones that have less budget. You know, it
is therapists, it is social care, it is... you
know, nursing and hospitals. And I feel like
teachers are wearing the weight of that because
they're seeing day to day. So they're having
to put on those hats. They're having to be occupational
therapists and speech and language therapists
and physios and nurses and social carers and
therapists and counselors. And they're having
to be all of these, and parents sometimes, they're
having to be all of these different people for
these children just to get through the day before
they've even worn their teacher hat. Because
how could you teach a child? old. that doesn't
have their basic needs met. I feel like that's
the real crisis. Talk about crisis. That's what
the real crisis in schools right now is that
teachers aren't able to do their job. And same
for parents. Parents are having to, and I saw
this as a foster carer. As a foster carer, I
couldn't just be a parent. He didn't have a social
worker for 12 weeks. So I was a social worker.
I'm fighting his needs there. I was his education
because he wasn't in school because they expelled
him. I was his parent. I was his foster carer.
I was his friend. He didn't have any friends
because he wasn't in school. I was wearing so
many hats whilst doing so much admin. That was
a huge eye -opener to how much carers have to
manage and have to hold. Again, that's why they're
in crisis. If they were able to just do the role
of a parent, and I say just very, very lightly
because it is not a just, but if they could just
wear that parent hat, we wouldn't see as much
burnout. They would absolutely thrive. The kids
would thrive because they were... being supported
by all the people that are trained to and is
their job to do all those other roles. But ultimately,
what we're seeing is teachers and parents are
having to hold everybody else. And that's only
getting worse. And those that are putting in
that work of teachers that are putting in that
extra work are the ones that are burning out
first. And they're the ones that are leaving
the career. And ultimately that's going to end
up with lots of newly qualified, but not very
much experienced teachers that are still passionate,
but don't have maybe that as much experience
or teachers that have learned coping strategies
to not care as much. And it happens really, and
that's no judgment. You cannot do. The job like
that, if you care about every single people and
every single thing, it will burn you out. It
isn't sustainable. And I noticed it as a foster
carer as well. You know, when I said I was getting
eight referrals a day coming through. At first,
I was reading every single one. I was imagining
them and I was imagining in my home and I was
loving them. And there wasn't even a picture.
There wasn't even their name on there. It was
literally just the initials on printed white
paper. And I was falling in love with all of
these children saying, yes, yes, yes. After two
weeks of doing that, I became disassociated because
your heart cannot work like that. It is not sustainable.
I would notice certain words on there and I would
say no. Because you cannot care to that level
and carry on the job. And that's what teachers
are finding. That's what social workers are finding.
That's what nurses are finding. It's what therapists
are finding. It is unsustainable to care the
amount that needs to be cared for. And then ultimately,
those teachers leave. And that helped me make
my decision as well because... I was just seeing
failure after failure after failure. And it's
really hard to carry on fighting when you can
see a failing system and not feel like you're
doing anything about it. And I think that was
also another reason why I started my business
because I was helping 10 children. Great. There
are 10 children in my class. There's 10 families.
They were thriving. We were doing great. But
it was such a tiny drop in the ocean of failure.
Whereas now I can reach thousands of, hundreds
of thousands of families all over the world and
maybe make more difference and that kind of have
that ripple effect. I feel as my legacy as a
teacher, a really passionate teacher, I'm making
far more impact in this way, even if it's diluted
on screen and through social media, rather than
those 10 in my company. There's no doubt you
can do either. Both are really important jobs.
It's just that's the decision I made for myself
to feel like I was having a part to play in helping
this huge issue. Absolutely. I had to kind of
balance that as well with when I started it to
go to support and out to community. That's very
much the intentional reasoning for that because
I couldn't support everyone and I felt like I
had to. Yeah. Like when I asked her who needs
support. That's a neurodivergent thing too. That's
an ADHD thing too. Your major empath is a big
part of our makeup and you can't. Right. And
then I kept beating myself up. And then I eventually
get angry at everyone else because I'm like,
what do you expect me to do? And it was really,
really toxic because I was doing it and taking
up all the things. And I've realized now to put
the community in, do the life support, give the
offerings for everybody else to go there. And
it's really shamed. It's true. You do have to.
And this is where I think parents go wrong with
their children. You have to privatise yourself
at some point. It's easier said than done. Yeah.
I would have said the same before being a foster
carer, but if I hadn't have done those other
jobs, I'd definitely put myself last, like, by
a long way, which is why we ended up, you know,
him having to move on. Like, ultimately, like,
he had nothing there. Nobody else was going to
do those things. Nobody else was keeping him
safe. Nobody else was educating him. Nobody else
was... you know, teaching him these things. It
had to be us. So yes, of course, in an ideal
world, I would have been his parent and I would
have thrived and we'd have stayed together and
all of those things. But that just isn't, it
just, we were being failed in so many catastrophic
ways that that was just not a reality for us.
And that's the same for so many, so many other
parents. It's hard. What I see is as well, that
they kind of, it's remembering that you're a
person too. And that's what I'm, the work I'm
doing at the moment is to kind of that as well,
is them hard boundaries, isn't it? what fights
and that's horrible as well even because you
want to find more like what what bit of fights
are to time you're going to rest and recover
and you end up let's be realistic we don't balance
it out with neurodivergency you don't you do
everything is the emergency and you end up doing
everything for a huge amount of time and and
just the way of i was saying it the other day
was talking about just if you ever fall out of
a teacher like or a bad relationship the anxiety
and the effort and the emotions that both of
you will have five days a week It was incredible.
Without anything else, just in case there's an
email or a phone call or the conversations you're
about to have. And it's exhausting. And you're
doing that for like a whole year at least because
of the relationship with one teacher. If it's
a school, oh my God, you're doing that for like,
God, 10 years? I guess the answer is that if
anyone's listening to this. and isn't in the
absolute burnout pits of it all right now, but
has the passion to support somebody, then reach
out to a friend that might be, reach out to a
teacher that might be, reach out to a parent
that might be, and just see what you can hold
for them so that they can, so it's even possible
to, that they can think about themselves for
10 minutes, half an hour, an hour. That might
make it possible. And if we're all holding each
other, then maybe that would make it more realistic.
Yeah, it's the community, isn't it? But I think
the more the community we've got and make them
safe spaces for us to go out in like a setting
or even to communicate with each other, to kind
of loosen around, it kind of helps. And you do
kind of pick it up there as well, isn't it? Like
you kind of help each other through behaviours,
you help each other through a lot. I think the
community is something that you can't, it's the
one thing that all of this has created that's
amazing. It's the one thing that it's just the
silver lining and a half is the community, the
same community. I just said that us two linking
up, it's very forthcoming and people do want
to help. And when you have got a passion like
you have and stuff like that, you will just help.
Like you said, now you're helping hundreds of
thousands of people. I really didn't need much
to feel supported. It didn't take much. It took
one of our friends coming over and playing PlayStation
with our child just so that I could do the washing
up, like put the washing up and do the boring
stuff and like just feel a bit of relief from
that like constant. pressure to be everybody
sometimes it's that it really doesn't have to
be a big major fix or job sometimes just being
present sometimes just loving the child as well
as the parent Yeah, exactly. So it is incredibly
helpful. I'm really grateful that I've had the
experience that I've had through foster care
because I definitely would be quite ignorant
to the weight and role of the parent and the
carer in this space. And it's a privilege to
have dipped my toe into that world to have a
little bit more understanding of the reality
of, yeah, the burnout and the weight of fighting
for their right. I've heard it's hard. I've had
a couple of foster carers and it is your life,
isn't it? Your goal is to make it a normal family
and everything in that process makes it not a
normal family in the sense of all the reports,
all of the things you have to fill out. It's
so sad to see, especially when you've got a good
family, like I'm sure you was, when you walk
in there and it is like they're not foster kids.
And then you have to do stuff like treat them
like foster kids in these meetings and talk to
them about it. It's so hard. ask permission for
haircuts you know like you're reminded it was
a huge fight to get passport for him taken to
Disneyland like like it took months of fighting
for that so yeah you're constantly reminded yeah
of those things but it's an incredible role and
if you are interested in foster care or respite
care then always reach out to me because I'm
incredibly passionate about it it's a really
amazing thing to do even if you're just doing
it short term you know it's i mean short term
i don't underestimate what short term would do
i know from the respite is needed like even if
you could just do something you don't think about
full commitment that is madly under like that
would help so many people i think people go to
tears being offered respite some foster parents
wouldn't know we needed so ironically we were
respite fester carers but we needed respite from
our long -term placement and i know how valuable
that would have been just a weekend yeah we had
two weekends across the year and it just meant
that we could be the parents that he needed us
to be when he came back and he had a great time
too like respite is so fun and so fantastic it's
a really great way of of supporting again being
if you've got something to give you can support
that that community or, yeah, offering respite
to your friend. And respite doesn't have to look
like overnight care because sometimes that's
not appropriate or possible. It can literally
look like watching a TV program with the child
or playing on the iPad with the child so that
the parent can have a hot cup of tea. You know,
that's respite too. And it just keeps them going.
And that's ultimately what we need. Checking
in on your teacher colleagues as well. I'm just
not assuming they're okay. You know, checking
in before school, checking in after school. you
know ranting with each other supporting each
other it goes a really long way so if you feel
like you're not in burnout right now or in crisis
and you do have the capacity to give just that
little bit more in whatever means you have with
those community around you then i highly recommend
it because it might just keep them going yeah
And I'll personally say for my audience, I've
got to the point, and I've mentioned this in
the last couple of podcasts, but we've got to
get to the point of agreement with the world.
Yes, we're angry. Yes, we're hating and stuff
like that. But it is, everyone is trying, you've
got the kids at heart, apart from, I would argue,
local authorities. But apart from that, everyone
has the kids' interest. The kids' videos probably
do. That's the irony. Well, when I say like a
four years, I mean the actual high, high ups
that are running. I'm not talking about the people
that work, the social workers and stuff like
that. They go into it as well, thinking they
can help. And then I've seen it and they're like,
no chance. So you're going to be able to do anything.
Individual level, everyone is passionate and
wanting the best of the children for the most
part. But maybe all of our hands are tied. Yeah.
And you don't know until you ask, right? And
instead, it's better to ask the question than
assume. so even if you think that is there to
get the answer it might be completely shocking
like especially like you said the comment section
is really good for that because someone was saying
something and some people generally learn off
that and i'm saying nothing and having that judgment
i think that's where the fear and then the divide
comes have a lack of egos too like I actually
love being questioned because it really does
make me think yeah why am I doing that one of
my favorite things that my new teaching assistants
would come in they had no experience no prior
training at all they would come in I love working
with people like that because they ask why all
the time and sometimes I could answer their question
and other times I think Yeah, why do we do that?
Is the answer simply because it's always been
that way? And I need to really check myself if
that is the answer. I love being questioned.
And often in my comment section, 50 % of them
I have an answer for. 50 % of them I think, do
you know what? You're right. I shouldn't have
said it like that. Or I should change my way.
And I love that. You've got to, don't you? Learning.
I've changed my practice so much in the last
two years. So much. And I hope to keep changing.
I hope to keep listening to adult voices. I hope
to autistic adult voices, disabled adults. voices
to and carers and therapists I mean that's why
I love doing my podcast because I'm learning
all the time and it's changing my practice I've
shifted massively recently it's only because
I'm listening I'm open -minded I'm open to being
questioned and challenged and changing and I
think if we're all like that also then that would
be better too I'm not saying my way is the only
way and even the right way I'm just saying I'm
growing and developing and this is what I'm this
is how I'm doing it right now this is what feels
good for me right now but my god am I open to
being questioned and challenged and yeah I think
I think that's a good thing Yeah. And it's quite
nice, actually, for us to get the opportunity
to kind of say that about, because it does, we
learn just as much. And it is kind of, I say
it's a bit selfish, because as much as they've
only spoken to someone that understands, and
we've listened, and they're like, oh, someone,
we've got to do that so many times. So we kind
of live in that. But it's not many times you
get a shout out. So yes, thanks for everybody
for, because I have this year, and it does, it
guides you. I learn, I've matured, I've learned
to, and I know it sounds mad, but learning to
listen was the biggest change ever. When I stopped
trying to fix everyone's problems and just listen
to the problem. and then just go you're doing
the right thing it's not your fault like that
that was a million more things than me trying
to go do this do that do that and maybe if you
tried that because i think that you know i learned
that and i think now i'm seeing what the benefit
is of working together in the community community
shapes each other right so that it you know we
learn from each other and then we become the
perfect community yeah i agree no good yeah nothing
that's it we've fixed the world But no, yeah,
I think it's been amazing. It's been an amazing
podcast and I think we've covered quite a lot.
And as you said, I'm happy to obviously work
together as many things as we can and we'll get
ahead together and see what else we can kind
of get together and see if we can share audiences
and stuff like that. But it's been absolutely
amazing. So thank you for, as I said, you're
busy as hell. I'm busy, but you're busier. Like,
do you know what I mean? Like, getting you on
the podcast is amazing. So thank you. Really
appreciate you holding space because I very rarely
get the opportunity to share on this long form
format. yeah, what I'm passionate about and my
reasons why. And maybe I need to share more of
that so that people understand my why. So yeah,
thank you for giving me the opportunity to do
that. No, it is very good. And I think, yeah,
I think it is a great opportunity to get that
out. And I hope that people then see you as a
bigger picture because it is hard. I know exactly
what you said. 60 seconds could be life or death.
And that's someone's opinion for life on you.
You say the wrong thing or cut it too short.
That's it. You're that person now. It's true.
It's very true. Social media can be cruel. Yeah.
But yeah, thank you very much. Thanks a lot for
having me.