Emotional bites talking about the things that people don't talk about.
This week's deep dive is a listener request. So Denise, if you're listening, this one is for you.
Today we're going deep into the world of goal setting and achievement and that sneaky problem of
procrastination. Okay, let's unpack this. We all set goals whether we realize it or not.
Absolutely. Grab that morning coffee, finish that project, book that trip. Those are all goals.
Yeah. But sometimes our goals feel, well, a bit aimless, right? Like we're just going through
the motions without a real sense of purpose. Right. That's where this idea of values based
goal setting comes in. Values are your guiding principles, the things that truly matter to you
like family, creativity, learning or adventure. Yeah. When your goals are aligned with these values,
they become more than just tasks on a list. They become expressions of who you are and what you
want to create in your life. So it's not just about achieving something, it's about achieving
something that actually resonates with your core beliefs. Exactly. This is where the smart goal
system comes in. It's a framework for turning those fuzzy aspirations now infused with our values
into concrete action plans. The beauty of smart goals is that they remove the ambiguity and give
you a clear path forward. Okay. I'm intrigued. Let's break it down. Sure. What does smart stand for?
Yeah. I know you're going to tell me, but our listeners might not know. And we want to make
sure everyone's on the same page here. Absolutely. Smart stands for specific, measurable, achievable,
relevant and time bound. Okay. Each of these elements plays a crucial role in transforming
a wish into a tangible goal. Okay. Hit me with some examples. Let's say my value is creativity
and my goal is to, I don't know, learn to play the ukulele. Okay. How do I make that smart?
Okay. So instead of learn to play the ukulele, which is pretty vague. Yeah. A specific goal would be
learn to play three basic ukulele chords so I can strum along to my favorite song by December
31st. See how that incorporates several smart elements. It's specific, measurable, achievable,
relevant to your value of creativity and it have a deadline. That's brilliant. It went from this
nebulous idea to something I could actually picture myself doing. Yeah. I'm already feeling
more motivated. That's great. But let's be real for a second. Even with the best goals, sometimes
that pesky procrastination monster rears its ugly head. Right. We know what we should be doing. Yeah.
But we find ourselves scrolling through social media, cleaning the kitchen, anything, but tackling
the actual task. Procrastination is a universal struggle. Yeah. And it often stems from deeper
psychological factors like fear of failure or feeling overwhelmed. Right. One fascinating
insight from the research is that procrastination isn't simply about laziness. It's often a way
of coping with those negative emotions associated with a task. We put it off to avoid feeling anxious,
stressed or inadequate. So it's like we're subconsciously sabotaging ourselves to protect
our ego. It is. That's kind of sneaky, but also makes a lot of sense. I've definitely been there.
Yeah, me too. It's a self-preservation mechanism, but unfortunately it often backfires. Yeah. The
more we procrastinate, the more those negative feelings intensify creating a vicious cycle.
The research even identifies different procrastination styles, which can help us tailor our
approach to overcoming it. Okay. I have to hear more about these procrastination styles. All right.
So let's break down these procrastination styles. Arousal, avoidant and decisional. Think of these
as different flavors of procrastination, each driven by its own unique motivations. Okay. So
if identifying my procrastination styles like figuring out my procrastination flavor,
what are the telltale signs of each one? Well, let's start with the arousal procrastinator.
This is the person who thrives on that last minute adrenaline rush. They wait until the
deadline is breathing down their neck and then they spring into action fueled by that pressure. Oh,
I know a few people like that. They always say they work best under pressure, but it seems pretty
stressful to me. It can be. But for some, that pressure cooker environment is actually energizing.
Then we have the avoidant procrastinator. This type tends to put things off due to a fear of failure
or judgment or even success. So they're essentially procrastinating to avoid uncomfortable emotions.
Exactly. They might be afraid of not living up to expectations or maybe they doubt their own
abilities. And so procrastination becomes this shield against those anxieties. And finally,
we have the decisional procrastinator. As the name suggests, these folks struggle with making
choices, especially when faced with a lot of options or potentially negative consequences.
Oh, I think we've all experienced decision fatigue at some point. Too many choices can be paralyzing.
Absolutely. And for decisional procrastinators, that paralysis can lead to avoiding tasks
altogether. Now, keep in mind that these styles aren't mutually exclusive. You might see bits of
yourself in each one. The key is to identify your dominance style, the one that most often trips you
up. So how do we figure out which procrastination personality we are? Are there any clues we
should be looking for? Well, think about your typical procrastination patterns. What are the
thoughts and the feelings that usually accompany your procrastination? Do you find yourself drawn
to that last minute rush? Or are you putting things off because of fear or self-doubt?
And if you find yourself endlessly weighing options and struggling to commit to a course of
action, that could point to decisional procrastination. Right. Once you have a handle on your procrastination
style, you can start to tailor strategies that address those specific patterns. And that's where
those smart goals can come in handy. Right, smart goals. They felt almost like a revelation the first
time I learned about them. It was like someone handed me a map for navigating the often overwhelming
world of goal setting. They really are a game changer. And the beauty of smart goals is that
they can be adapted to address those different procrastination styles. Okay, I'm really intrigued
now. Can you give us some examples of how that works? Absolutely. Let's take the arousal procrastinator.
They thrive on that last minute energy, right? So for them, building in many deadlines throughout
the process can be incredibly effective. It's like giving them those little bursts of pressure
that they crave, but in a more controlled way. Exactly. Instead of waiting for that final
deadline to loom, they can create their own sense of urgency. Now for the avoidant procrastinator
who's often battling fear and self-doubt, focusing on the achievable aspect of smart goals is key.
So breaking down those big scary goals into smaller, more manageable steps that feel less
intimidating. Precisely. And this is where that personal relevance comes in. If they choose goals
that genuinely excite them and align with their strengths, it helps to combat those feelings of
self-doubt. It's like building confidence one small win at a time. Now for the decisional
procrastinator who gets stuck in analysis paralysis, the time-bound element can be a lifesaver.
Setting a clear deadline helps to create a sense of urgency, and it minimizes the opportunity
for overthinking. It's like setting boundaries for the decision-making process so it doesn't
spiral out of control. Exactly. And once they've made a decision, it's important to stick with it
and avoid revisiting the options endlessly. Okay, so we've got some really practical strategies
for addressing those different procrastination styles. One that really stood out to me from a
source on setting goals is the power of visualization. They suggest that simply imagining yourself
successfully completing a goal can actually increase your motivation and make it feel more
achievable. It sounds a bit, uh, a bit woo-woo, but there's actually some solid psychology behind it.
Visualization can help to prime your brain for action and make the goal feel, like, you know,
more real and attainable. That's fascinating. It's like giving your brain a sneak peek at the
finish line. Exactly. And speaking of making things feel more manageable, another key strategy
that, um, that's emphasized in several of our sources is breaking down large tasks into smaller,
you know, fight-sized chunks. Yes, this is such a classic productivity tip, but it's so important.
Instead of getting overwhelmed by this huge project, you can focus on conquering one step
at a time. Right. It's about creating a sense of momentum and progress. And don't underestimate
the power of optimizing your environment for focus. Uh-huh. One of the pasted tech sources talks about,
you know, minimizing distractions, setting up a dedicated workspace, even using tools like,
you know, website blockers to keep yourself on track. That's a great point. Sometimes it's not
just about willpower. It's about, you know, setting ourselves up for success by creating an
environment that supports our goals. Right. But what about those goals that we know are important,
but don't exactly set our souls on fire, like, say, filing taxes or cleaning the bathroom?
Well, that's where those goal-setting skills and a little creativity come in handy. Remember that
source we mentioned earlier? 42 goal-setting activities for students and kids? It's packed
with fun and engaging activities that can help transform even the most mundane tasks into
enjoyable challenges. Okay. I'm all ears. Tell me more about these magical activities. Yeah.
Well, one activity that stood out to me is the cat on your head game. It involves brainstorming a
list of goals and then randomly assigning a silly action to each goal, like doing a silly dance or
meowing like a cat every time you make progress. Okay. That sounds hilarious. I can already picture
people doing the procrastination shuffle every time they check an item off their to-do list.
The point is to inject a dose of humor and lightheartedness into the goal-setting process.
When we can laugh at ourselves and find joy in the journey, it helps us stay motivated even when
we face obstacles. It's like we're rewiring our brains to associate goal-setting with positive
emotions instead of stress and dread. Exactly. And that shift in perspective can make all the
difference in our ability to overcome procrastination and achieve our goals. So as we wrap up our
deep dive into the world of goal-setting, procrastination, and motivation, the key takeaway
is this. It's not about becoming a superhuman goal-achieving machine overnight. It's about
understanding our own unique procrastination styles, setting smart and meaningful goals,
and finding ways to make the journey enjoyable. It's about embracing the process, celebrating
the small wins and being kind to ourselves along the way. Absolutely. And remember, there's no one
size fits all solution. What works for one person might not work for another. The important thing
is to experiment, find what resonates with you, and keep learning and growing. So for all of us,
all our listeners out there, the challenge is this. What one small step can you take today to
move closer to a goal that truly matters to you? It's not just about achieving the goal,
it's about who you become in the process. And stay curious about achieving your goals.