1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:03,840 Emotional bites talking about the things that people don't talk about. 2 00:00:21,680 --> 00:00:26,880 This week's deep dive is a listener request. So Denise, if you're listening, this one is for you. 3 00:00:26,880 --> 00:00:35,120 Today we're going deep into the world of goal setting and achievement and that sneaky problem of 4 00:00:35,120 --> 00:00:41,040 procrastination. Okay, let's unpack this. We all set goals whether we realize it or not. 5 00:00:41,040 --> 00:00:46,160 Absolutely. Grab that morning coffee, finish that project, book that trip. Those are all goals. 6 00:00:46,160 --> 00:00:51,920 Yeah. But sometimes our goals feel, well, a bit aimless, right? Like we're just going through 7 00:00:51,920 --> 00:00:56,400 the motions without a real sense of purpose. Right. That's where this idea of values based 8 00:00:56,400 --> 00:01:01,520 goal setting comes in. Values are your guiding principles, the things that truly matter to you 9 00:01:01,520 --> 00:01:06,320 like family, creativity, learning or adventure. Yeah. When your goals are aligned with these values, 10 00:01:06,320 --> 00:01:12,160 they become more than just tasks on a list. They become expressions of who you are and what you 11 00:01:12,160 --> 00:01:16,640 want to create in your life. So it's not just about achieving something, it's about achieving 12 00:01:16,640 --> 00:01:21,840 something that actually resonates with your core beliefs. Exactly. This is where the smart goal 13 00:01:21,840 --> 00:01:26,960 system comes in. It's a framework for turning those fuzzy aspirations now infused with our values 14 00:01:26,960 --> 00:01:32,560 into concrete action plans. The beauty of smart goals is that they remove the ambiguity and give 15 00:01:32,560 --> 00:01:37,600 you a clear path forward. Okay. I'm intrigued. Let's break it down. Sure. What does smart stand for? 16 00:01:37,600 --> 00:01:41,680 Yeah. I know you're going to tell me, but our listeners might not know. And we want to make 17 00:01:41,680 --> 00:01:46,720 sure everyone's on the same page here. Absolutely. Smart stands for specific, measurable, achievable, 18 00:01:46,720 --> 00:01:52,400 relevant and time bound. Okay. Each of these elements plays a crucial role in transforming 19 00:01:52,400 --> 00:01:58,080 a wish into a tangible goal. Okay. Hit me with some examples. Let's say my value is creativity 20 00:01:58,080 --> 00:02:05,200 and my goal is to, I don't know, learn to play the ukulele. Okay. How do I make that smart? 21 00:02:05,200 --> 00:02:10,400 Okay. So instead of learn to play the ukulele, which is pretty vague. Yeah. A specific goal would be 22 00:02:11,120 --> 00:02:16,400 learn to play three basic ukulele chords so I can strum along to my favorite song by December 23 00:02:16,400 --> 00:02:23,440 31st. See how that incorporates several smart elements. It's specific, measurable, achievable, 24 00:02:24,000 --> 00:02:28,640 relevant to your value of creativity and it have a deadline. That's brilliant. It went from this 25 00:02:28,640 --> 00:02:32,720 nebulous idea to something I could actually picture myself doing. Yeah. I'm already feeling 26 00:02:32,720 --> 00:02:38,240 more motivated. That's great. But let's be real for a second. Even with the best goals, sometimes 27 00:02:38,240 --> 00:02:43,360 that pesky procrastination monster rears its ugly head. Right. We know what we should be doing. Yeah. 28 00:02:43,360 --> 00:02:49,760 But we find ourselves scrolling through social media, cleaning the kitchen, anything, but tackling 29 00:02:49,760 --> 00:02:55,040 the actual task. Procrastination is a universal struggle. Yeah. And it often stems from deeper 30 00:02:55,040 --> 00:03:00,400 psychological factors like fear of failure or feeling overwhelmed. Right. One fascinating 31 00:03:00,400 --> 00:03:05,840 insight from the research is that procrastination isn't simply about laziness. It's often a way 32 00:03:05,840 --> 00:03:12,560 of coping with those negative emotions associated with a task. We put it off to avoid feeling anxious, 33 00:03:12,560 --> 00:03:17,440 stressed or inadequate. So it's like we're subconsciously sabotaging ourselves to protect 34 00:03:17,440 --> 00:03:21,680 our ego. It is. That's kind of sneaky, but also makes a lot of sense. I've definitely been there. 35 00:03:21,680 --> 00:03:26,720 Yeah, me too. It's a self-preservation mechanism, but unfortunately it often backfires. Yeah. The 36 00:03:26,720 --> 00:03:31,600 more we procrastinate, the more those negative feelings intensify creating a vicious cycle. 37 00:03:31,600 --> 00:03:35,840 The research even identifies different procrastination styles, which can help us tailor our 38 00:03:35,840 --> 00:03:40,560 approach to overcoming it. Okay. I have to hear more about these procrastination styles. All right. 39 00:03:40,560 --> 00:03:45,920 So let's break down these procrastination styles. Arousal, avoidant and decisional. Think of these 40 00:03:45,920 --> 00:03:50,640 as different flavors of procrastination, each driven by its own unique motivations. Okay. So 41 00:03:51,280 --> 00:03:55,680 if identifying my procrastination styles like figuring out my procrastination flavor, 42 00:03:55,680 --> 00:03:59,920 what are the telltale signs of each one? Well, let's start with the arousal procrastinator. 43 00:04:00,480 --> 00:04:05,440 This is the person who thrives on that last minute adrenaline rush. They wait until the 44 00:04:05,440 --> 00:04:10,960 deadline is breathing down their neck and then they spring into action fueled by that pressure. Oh, 45 00:04:10,960 --> 00:04:15,520 I know a few people like that. They always say they work best under pressure, but it seems pretty 46 00:04:15,520 --> 00:04:20,720 stressful to me. It can be. But for some, that pressure cooker environment is actually energizing. 47 00:04:21,520 --> 00:04:27,280 Then we have the avoidant procrastinator. This type tends to put things off due to a fear of failure 48 00:04:27,280 --> 00:04:33,120 or judgment or even success. So they're essentially procrastinating to avoid uncomfortable emotions. 49 00:04:33,120 --> 00:04:37,600 Exactly. They might be afraid of not living up to expectations or maybe they doubt their own 50 00:04:37,600 --> 00:04:43,600 abilities. And so procrastination becomes this shield against those anxieties. And finally, 51 00:04:43,600 --> 00:04:47,920 we have the decisional procrastinator. As the name suggests, these folks struggle with making 52 00:04:47,920 --> 00:04:52,000 choices, especially when faced with a lot of options or potentially negative consequences. 53 00:04:52,000 --> 00:04:57,280 Oh, I think we've all experienced decision fatigue at some point. Too many choices can be paralyzing. 54 00:04:57,280 --> 00:05:02,320 Absolutely. And for decisional procrastinators, that paralysis can lead to avoiding tasks 55 00:05:02,320 --> 00:05:08,560 altogether. Now, keep in mind that these styles aren't mutually exclusive. You might see bits of 56 00:05:08,560 --> 00:05:14,240 yourself in each one. The key is to identify your dominance style, the one that most often trips you 57 00:05:14,240 --> 00:05:20,480 up. So how do we figure out which procrastination personality we are? Are there any clues we 58 00:05:20,480 --> 00:05:25,600 should be looking for? Well, think about your typical procrastination patterns. What are the 59 00:05:25,600 --> 00:05:30,000 thoughts and the feelings that usually accompany your procrastination? Do you find yourself drawn 60 00:05:30,000 --> 00:05:35,040 to that last minute rush? Or are you putting things off because of fear or self-doubt? 61 00:05:35,680 --> 00:05:39,520 And if you find yourself endlessly weighing options and struggling to commit to a course of 62 00:05:39,520 --> 00:05:44,880 action, that could point to decisional procrastination. Right. Once you have a handle on your procrastination 63 00:05:44,880 --> 00:05:49,360 style, you can start to tailor strategies that address those specific patterns. And that's where 64 00:05:49,360 --> 00:05:54,400 those smart goals can come in handy. Right, smart goals. They felt almost like a revelation the first 65 00:05:54,400 --> 00:05:59,680 time I learned about them. It was like someone handed me a map for navigating the often overwhelming 66 00:05:59,680 --> 00:06:04,800 world of goal setting. They really are a game changer. And the beauty of smart goals is that 67 00:06:04,800 --> 00:06:09,760 they can be adapted to address those different procrastination styles. Okay, I'm really intrigued 68 00:06:09,760 --> 00:06:14,640 now. Can you give us some examples of how that works? Absolutely. Let's take the arousal procrastinator. 69 00:06:14,640 --> 00:06:19,600 They thrive on that last minute energy, right? So for them, building in many deadlines throughout 70 00:06:19,600 --> 00:06:24,320 the process can be incredibly effective. It's like giving them those little bursts of pressure 71 00:06:24,320 --> 00:06:29,120 that they crave, but in a more controlled way. Exactly. Instead of waiting for that final 72 00:06:29,120 --> 00:06:34,720 deadline to loom, they can create their own sense of urgency. Now for the avoidant procrastinator 73 00:06:34,720 --> 00:06:41,440 who's often battling fear and self-doubt, focusing on the achievable aspect of smart goals is key. 74 00:06:41,440 --> 00:06:46,240 So breaking down those big scary goals into smaller, more manageable steps that feel less 75 00:06:46,240 --> 00:06:51,200 intimidating. Precisely. And this is where that personal relevance comes in. If they choose goals 76 00:06:51,200 --> 00:06:56,080 that genuinely excite them and align with their strengths, it helps to combat those feelings of 77 00:06:56,080 --> 00:07:00,640 self-doubt. It's like building confidence one small win at a time. Now for the decisional 78 00:07:00,640 --> 00:07:05,920 procrastinator who gets stuck in analysis paralysis, the time-bound element can be a lifesaver. 79 00:07:06,640 --> 00:07:12,080 Setting a clear deadline helps to create a sense of urgency, and it minimizes the opportunity 80 00:07:12,080 --> 00:07:15,920 for overthinking. It's like setting boundaries for the decision-making process so it doesn't 81 00:07:15,920 --> 00:07:20,880 spiral out of control. Exactly. And once they've made a decision, it's important to stick with it 82 00:07:20,880 --> 00:07:26,320 and avoid revisiting the options endlessly. Okay, so we've got some really practical strategies 83 00:07:26,320 --> 00:07:30,880 for addressing those different procrastination styles. One that really stood out to me from a 84 00:07:30,880 --> 00:07:37,520 source on setting goals is the power of visualization. They suggest that simply imagining yourself 85 00:07:37,520 --> 00:07:42,960 successfully completing a goal can actually increase your motivation and make it feel more 86 00:07:42,960 --> 00:07:48,400 achievable. It sounds a bit, uh, a bit woo-woo, but there's actually some solid psychology behind it. 87 00:07:48,400 --> 00:07:53,920 Visualization can help to prime your brain for action and make the goal feel, like, you know, 88 00:07:53,920 --> 00:07:57,680 more real and attainable. That's fascinating. It's like giving your brain a sneak peek at the 89 00:07:57,680 --> 00:08:03,040 finish line. Exactly. And speaking of making things feel more manageable, another key strategy 90 00:08:03,040 --> 00:08:08,160 that, um, that's emphasized in several of our sources is breaking down large tasks into smaller, 91 00:08:08,160 --> 00:08:14,400 you know, fight-sized chunks. Yes, this is such a classic productivity tip, but it's so important. 92 00:08:14,400 --> 00:08:19,600 Instead of getting overwhelmed by this huge project, you can focus on conquering one step 93 00:08:19,600 --> 00:08:24,560 at a time. Right. It's about creating a sense of momentum and progress. And don't underestimate 94 00:08:24,560 --> 00:08:30,560 the power of optimizing your environment for focus. Uh-huh. One of the pasted tech sources talks about, 95 00:08:30,560 --> 00:08:35,520 you know, minimizing distractions, setting up a dedicated workspace, even using tools like, 96 00:08:35,520 --> 00:08:40,720 you know, website blockers to keep yourself on track. That's a great point. Sometimes it's not 97 00:08:40,720 --> 00:08:45,040 just about willpower. It's about, you know, setting ourselves up for success by creating an 98 00:08:45,040 --> 00:08:50,160 environment that supports our goals. Right. But what about those goals that we know are important, 99 00:08:50,160 --> 00:08:55,680 but don't exactly set our souls on fire, like, say, filing taxes or cleaning the bathroom? 100 00:08:55,680 --> 00:08:59,920 Well, that's where those goal-setting skills and a little creativity come in handy. Remember that 101 00:08:59,920 --> 00:09:05,040 source we mentioned earlier? 42 goal-setting activities for students and kids? It's packed 102 00:09:05,040 --> 00:09:10,240 with fun and engaging activities that can help transform even the most mundane tasks into 103 00:09:10,240 --> 00:09:15,360 enjoyable challenges. Okay. I'm all ears. Tell me more about these magical activities. Yeah. 104 00:09:15,360 --> 00:09:20,160 Well, one activity that stood out to me is the cat on your head game. It involves brainstorming a 105 00:09:20,160 --> 00:09:25,280 list of goals and then randomly assigning a silly action to each goal, like doing a silly dance or 106 00:09:25,280 --> 00:09:29,440 meowing like a cat every time you make progress. Okay. That sounds hilarious. I can already picture 107 00:09:29,440 --> 00:09:32,960 people doing the procrastination shuffle every time they check an item off their to-do list. 108 00:09:32,960 --> 00:09:37,760 The point is to inject a dose of humor and lightheartedness into the goal-setting process. 109 00:09:37,760 --> 00:09:42,160 When we can laugh at ourselves and find joy in the journey, it helps us stay motivated even when 110 00:09:42,160 --> 00:09:47,680 we face obstacles. It's like we're rewiring our brains to associate goal-setting with positive 111 00:09:47,680 --> 00:09:52,880 emotions instead of stress and dread. Exactly. And that shift in perspective can make all the 112 00:09:52,880 --> 00:09:58,720 difference in our ability to overcome procrastination and achieve our goals. So as we wrap up our 113 00:09:58,720 --> 00:10:03,600 deep dive into the world of goal-setting, procrastination, and motivation, the key takeaway 114 00:10:03,600 --> 00:10:09,600 is this. It's not about becoming a superhuman goal-achieving machine overnight. It's about 115 00:10:09,600 --> 00:10:15,200 understanding our own unique procrastination styles, setting smart and meaningful goals, 116 00:10:15,200 --> 00:10:20,320 and finding ways to make the journey enjoyable. It's about embracing the process, celebrating 117 00:10:20,320 --> 00:10:25,200 the small wins and being kind to ourselves along the way. Absolutely. And remember, there's no one 118 00:10:25,200 --> 00:10:29,360 size fits all solution. What works for one person might not work for another. The important thing 119 00:10:29,360 --> 00:10:33,440 is to experiment, find what resonates with you, and keep learning and growing. So for all of us, 120 00:10:33,440 --> 00:10:38,160 all our listeners out there, the challenge is this. What one small step can you take today to 121 00:10:38,160 --> 00:10:42,880 move closer to a goal that truly matters to you? It's not just about achieving the goal, 122 00:10:42,880 --> 00:11:06,960 it's about who you become in the process. And stay curious about achieving your goals.