So you want to help a young fencer really thrive, huh?
Sounds like you brought some really interesting articles
to dig into for this deep dive,
especially like that about how hard parents
and coaches should push that really resonated.
It's such a critical balance to find, right?
Not just in youth fencing,
either any competitive activity, really.
That article though, while it uses fencing as the example,
some really universally applicable stuff.
Absolutely.
And there's this term they use,
the zone of proximal development or ZPD.
Ah, yes.
It sounds kind of jargony at first,
but they actually explain it in a way
that just clicked for me.
Like imagine a staircase each step up is a challenge.
Exactly.
But it's a challenge you can actually reach with support.
And that's the core of it.
You want the young fencer to be challenged,
to feel like they're stretching,
but not so overwhelmed that it's discouraging.
They have to feel capable.
Yeah, like this is tough, but I can totally do this.
And that actually reminded me of another part
they gave this example of like,
imagine throwing a brand new 12 year old fencer
into a national competition right away.
Oh yeah.
Talk about setting someone up to fail.
You can just picture it right.
This kid who's barely held an EP
going up against those seasoned competitors.
Oh, the pressure makes me want to run away.
But see, that's why the ZPD thing is so important.
It's about realistic goals.
100%.
Too easy and the kids bored too hard.
And it's just demoralizing.
Gotta hit that sweet spot where they're pushed,
but not like traumatized.
So true.
And that actually leads to another thing
that really got me thinking.
It's so important for these young athletes
to have that internal drive to succeed, right?
But how do you encourage that
without becoming like, you know, the dreaded tiger parent?
That is the million dollar question, isn't it?
Yeah.
The article had some good stuff on this,
especially about focusing on the process
rather than just the outcome.
Like yeah, winning is great,
but it's more about celebrating their effort,
dedication to practice,
good sportsmanship stuff they can control.
Oh, I like that.
Because it's a lot easier to offer consistent encouragement
when you're focusing on their hard work,
as opposed to whether they get that medal every time,
which let's face it is never guaranteed.
Exactly.
It teaches them that resilience,
that bounce back factor is what's key.
Even if they, you know, don't hit the podium this time,
they know how to keep improving.
It's a longer game.
So we're talking about pressure, right?
Competition pressure.
Yeah.
But the article also brought up something
that's, well, bigger picture,
the parent child bond, just the why behind it all.
Huge.
Honestly, I think that applies,
even if you're not the parent, right?
Whether you're a mentor, coach, family friend, whatever,
you've got to keep that young person's
well-being front and center.
Absolutely.
And sometimes the struggles these young athletes face,
especially on that strip,
they're not even always about fencing, are they?
There was this one anecdote in the article,
it talked about how sometimes these issues on the surface
are actually reflections of things going on
between the parent and child, deeper stuff.
So easy to get hyper-focused on performance
that we forget, these are just kids, right?
Sometimes just being present, listening with empathy,
that's the most powerful support you can give.
So we've talked about a lot,
this zone of proximal development,
how important intrinsic motivation is,
but how do we actually use all this?
Like what can our listener do
to really make a difference for this young fencer?
Well, I think that ZPD thing is actually
a great place to start.
Observation is key here.
Where is this young fencer at on their own,
you know, staircase of skills?
Right, like figure out their level
and then what a good challenge looks like for them, right?
Something they can actually handle,
but that still feels exciting.
Yeah, and once you've got a sense of where they're at,
then you can start breaking down those bigger goals.
It could be anything,
even something like making the school team
into smaller steps,
you know, go from zero to Olympian overnight.
That makes sense.
And this goes back to that thing
about intrinsic motivation, right?
If you're always focused on those smaller milestones,
celebrating the effort along the way,
it kind of naturally builds that love for the sport,
doesn't it?
Less about the pressure to win some big thing
way off in the future
and more about like enjoying the process as you go.
100%.
And speaking of enjoying the process.
Yeah.
The article also talked about how important it is
to make practice fun.
Oh, for sure.
Like how do you make all those hours
of footwork and blade work,
something they look forward to,
not something they dread.
Right, maybe you incorporate games,
get creative with the drills,
or even just, you know,
make sure you're having some laughs along the way.
You don't want it to feel like a chore.
That's so key.
Reminds me, when I was a kid learning piano,
my teacher would always stick these like,
goofy little songs in between the classical stuff.
And honestly, those are the moments
that made me actually want to practice.
See, it's amazing how powerful
that positive association can be.
And that actually ties into another point
the article made about learning from mistakes.
Yeah, instead of looking at messing up as a failure,
how do you help them see it as like a chance to grow?
Exactly.
Shifting that mindset from I screwed up to,
okay, what did I learn here?
How can I do it better next time?
And that's where you as that support system
are so important, helping them analyze, break it down,
find those little nuggets of wisdom, even in the mistakes.
That whole growth mindset thing, right?
Embracing challenges instead of being afraid of them.
100%.
And that's a skill that goes way beyond fencing, right?
Learning to bounce back from setbacks,
that's huge for life in general.
Totally.
So I'm curious, what are some actual things
our listener can do or say to help build
that growth mindset in this young fence?
Or like, how do you actually encourage
that positive self-talk?
Well, one thing is a really focus on praising effort,
not just the outcome.
Instead of saying great win, it's more like,
wow, you really kept your cool during that match.
That second to last touch was incredible.
You've clearly been putting in the work.
Oh, I love that.
It's about recognizing how far they've come,
not just whether they got the trophy this time.
Exactly.
And helping them reframe those failures
as learning moments.
They have a tough match.
Instead of letting them spiral into negativity,
you can be there to say, like, hey,
I know that wasn't the result you wanted,
but you showed some serious grit out there.
Let's break it down.
What can we learn?
Even if you didn't win this time,
I bet we can find some places
where you really pushed yourself.
Right.
And you're creating a whole journey, like you said before.
And I think by putting the emphasis on effort,
on improvement, on those small victories as you go,
that creates a much healthier, more sustainable way
to approach, well, competition and just growth in general.
Couldn't agree more.
And honestly, that's something we could all stand to remember,
not just young athletes, right?
Finding that sweet spot between pushing ourselves
to be better and also cutting ourselves some slack
when we stumble.
It's a lifelong balancing act.
It's interesting, isn't it?
We're talking about supporting young athletes,
but this whole conversation just keeps coming back
to these, like, bigger life lessons.
It's true.
I mean, that thing you just said
about balancing, pushing yourself and being kind to yourself,
that's something we all deal with,
no matter how old we are or what we're trying to achieve.
Absolutely.
And actually, you know, one of the other articles you sent,
I think it was the one about talent development.
It mentioned that even, like, experienced athletes,
people who are already at the top of their game,
they still need that support to keep growing.
Oh, totally.
It's easy to think, oh, they've made it,
they don't need encouragement anymore.
But that's so not true.
Even pros, they need those people.
Mentors, coaches, even just friends and family
who can give them honest feedback,
celebrate the wins with them,
be there during the tough times.
Right, like, it's not like you hit some level of success
and suddenly you're immune to self-doubt or feeling pressure.
Exactly.
You know, in a way, maybe that need for support,
that desire to keep pushing your own limits,
maybe that's actually part of what keeps us going.
It's that balance between being comfortable
and being challenged that makes us want to grow,
whether you're a young fencer just starting out
or, like, an Olympic athlete going for gold.
It makes you wonder, though,
if this approach works in sports, in our personal lives,
even in our careers, what if we brought that, like,
that sweet spot mindset to everything?
Our communities, workplaces, schools.
Wow, yeah.
Just imagine creating places where people feel supported
to take risks, to really go for it, to learn and grow
without being terrified of failing.
That's what it's all about, right?
Helping people reach their full potential,
whatever that looks like for them.
Absolutely. And you know what?
It starts with us.
With how we treat the people around us,
our kids, our friends, our coworkers,
it's about fostering that growth mindset,
focusing on the effort more than the outcome
and remembering that the journey is just as important
as the destination.
Couldn't have said it better myself.
So to all our listeners out there,
wherever you are on your own journey, remember,
you are capable of amazing things, embrace the challenges,
celebrate those victories big and small,
and never be afraid to ask for a helping hand
when you need it.
And hey, while you're at it, maybe take a second to think,
how can you create that sweet spot
for someone else in your life?
Love that, paying it forward,
creating that ripple effect of growth and encouragement.
So powerful.
Couldn't agree more.
Well, deep divers,
we've reached the end of our time today,
but the best part about a deep dive
is that it always leaves us with even more to explore, right?
So take these ideas, let them roll around in your mind
and see where they take you.
Until next time, keep diving deep
into all those fascinating corners of knowledge.