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So you want to help a young fencer really thrive, huh?

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Sounds like you brought some really interesting articles

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to dig into for this deep dive,

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especially like that about how hard parents

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and coaches should push that really resonated.

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It's such a critical balance to find, right?

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Not just in youth fencing,

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either any competitive activity, really.

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That article though, while it uses fencing as the example,

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some really universally applicable stuff.

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Absolutely.

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And there's this term they use,

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the zone of proximal development or ZPD.

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Ah, yes.

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It sounds kind of jargony at first,

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but they actually explain it in a way

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that just clicked for me.

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Like imagine a staircase each step up is a challenge.

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Exactly.

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But it's a challenge you can actually reach with support.

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And that's the core of it.

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You want the young fencer to be challenged,

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to feel like they're stretching,

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but not so overwhelmed that it's discouraging.

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They have to feel capable.

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Yeah, like this is tough, but I can totally do this.

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And that actually reminded me of another part

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they gave this example of like,

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imagine throwing a brand new 12 year old fencer

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into a national competition right away.

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Oh yeah.

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Talk about setting someone up to fail.

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You can just picture it right.

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This kid who's barely held an EP

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going up against those seasoned competitors.

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Oh, the pressure makes me want to run away.

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But see, that's why the ZPD thing is so important.

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It's about realistic goals.

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100%.

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Too easy and the kids bored too hard.

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And it's just demoralizing.

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Gotta hit that sweet spot where they're pushed,

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but not like traumatized.

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So true.

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And that actually leads to another thing

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that really got me thinking.

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It's so important for these young athletes

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to have that internal drive to succeed, right?

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But how do you encourage that

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without becoming like, you know, the dreaded tiger parent?

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That is the million dollar question, isn't it?

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Yeah.

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The article had some good stuff on this,

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especially about focusing on the process

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rather than just the outcome.

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Like yeah, winning is great,

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but it's more about celebrating their effort,

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dedication to practice,

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good sportsmanship stuff they can control.

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Oh, I like that.

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Because it's a lot easier to offer consistent encouragement

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when you're focusing on their hard work,

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as opposed to whether they get that medal every time,

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which let's face it is never guaranteed.

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Exactly.

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It teaches them that resilience,

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that bounce back factor is what's key.

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Even if they, you know, don't hit the podium this time,

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they know how to keep improving.

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It's a longer game.

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So we're talking about pressure, right?

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Competition pressure.

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Yeah.

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But the article also brought up something

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that's, well, bigger picture,

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the parent child bond, just the why behind it all.

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Huge.

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Honestly, I think that applies,

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even if you're not the parent, right?

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Whether you're a mentor, coach, family friend, whatever,

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you've got to keep that young person's

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well-being front and center.

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Absolutely.

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And sometimes the struggles these young athletes face,

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especially on that strip,

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they're not even always about fencing, are they?

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There was this one anecdote in the article,

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it talked about how sometimes these issues on the surface

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are actually reflections of things going on

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between the parent and child, deeper stuff.

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So easy to get hyper-focused on performance

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that we forget, these are just kids, right?

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Sometimes just being present, listening with empathy,

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that's the most powerful support you can give.

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So we've talked about a lot,

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this zone of proximal development,

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how important intrinsic motivation is,

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but how do we actually use all this?

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Like what can our listener do

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to really make a difference for this young fencer?

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Well, I think that ZPD thing is actually

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a great place to start.

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Observation is key here.

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Where is this young fencer at on their own,

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you know, staircase of skills?

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Right, like figure out their level

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and then what a good challenge looks like for them, right?

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Something they can actually handle,

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but that still feels exciting.

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Yeah, and once you've got a sense of where they're at,

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then you can start breaking down those bigger goals.

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It could be anything,

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even something like making the school team

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into smaller steps,

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you know, go from zero to Olympian overnight.

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That makes sense.

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And this goes back to that thing

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about intrinsic motivation, right?

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If you're always focused on those smaller milestones,

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celebrating the effort along the way,

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it kind of naturally builds that love for the sport,

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doesn't it?

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Less about the pressure to win some big thing

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way off in the future

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and more about like enjoying the process as you go.

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100%.

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And speaking of enjoying the process.

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Yeah.

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The article also talked about how important it is

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to make practice fun.

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Oh, for sure.

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Like how do you make all those hours

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of footwork and blade work,

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something they look forward to,

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not something they dread.

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Right, maybe you incorporate games,

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get creative with the drills,

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or even just, you know,

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make sure you're having some laughs along the way.

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You don't want it to feel like a chore.

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That's so key.

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Reminds me, when I was a kid learning piano,

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my teacher would always stick these like,

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goofy little songs in between the classical stuff.

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And honestly, those are the moments

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that made me actually want to practice.

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See, it's amazing how powerful

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that positive association can be.

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And that actually ties into another point

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the article made about learning from mistakes.

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Yeah, instead of looking at messing up as a failure,

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how do you help them see it as like a chance to grow?

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Exactly.

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Shifting that mindset from I screwed up to,

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okay, what did I learn here?

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How can I do it better next time?

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And that's where you as that support system

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are so important, helping them analyze, break it down,

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find those little nuggets of wisdom, even in the mistakes.

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That whole growth mindset thing, right?

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Embracing challenges instead of being afraid of them.

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100%.

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And that's a skill that goes way beyond fencing, right?

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Learning to bounce back from setbacks,

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that's huge for life in general.

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Totally.

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So I'm curious, what are some actual things

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our listener can do or say to help build

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that growth mindset in this young fence?

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Or like, how do you actually encourage

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that positive self-talk?

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Well, one thing is a really focus on praising effort,

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not just the outcome.

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Instead of saying great win, it's more like,

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wow, you really kept your cool during that match.

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That second to last touch was incredible.

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You've clearly been putting in the work.

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Oh, I love that.

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It's about recognizing how far they've come,

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not just whether they got the trophy this time.

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Exactly.

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And helping them reframe those failures

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as learning moments.

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They have a tough match.

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Instead of letting them spiral into negativity,

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you can be there to say, like, hey,

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I know that wasn't the result you wanted,

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but you showed some serious grit out there.

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Let's break it down.

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What can we learn?

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Even if you didn't win this time,

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I bet we can find some places

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where you really pushed yourself.

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Right.

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And you're creating a whole journey, like you said before.

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And I think by putting the emphasis on effort,

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on improvement, on those small victories as you go,

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that creates a much healthier, more sustainable way

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to approach, well, competition and just growth in general.

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Couldn't agree more.

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And honestly, that's something we could all stand to remember,

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not just young athletes, right?

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Finding that sweet spot between pushing ourselves

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to be better and also cutting ourselves some slack

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when we stumble.

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It's a lifelong balancing act.

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It's interesting, isn't it?

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We're talking about supporting young athletes,

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but this whole conversation just keeps coming back

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to these, like, bigger life lessons.

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It's true.

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I mean, that thing you just said

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about balancing, pushing yourself and being kind to yourself,

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that's something we all deal with,

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no matter how old we are or what we're trying to achieve.

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Absolutely.

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And actually, you know, one of the other articles you sent,

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I think it was the one about talent development.

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It mentioned that even, like, experienced athletes,

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people who are already at the top of their game,

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they still need that support to keep growing.

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Oh, totally.

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It's easy to think, oh, they've made it,

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they don't need encouragement anymore.

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But that's so not true.

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Even pros, they need those people.

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Mentors, coaches, even just friends and family

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who can give them honest feedback,

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celebrate the wins with them,

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be there during the tough times.

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Right, like, it's not like you hit some level of success

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and suddenly you're immune to self-doubt or feeling pressure.

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Exactly.

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You know, in a way, maybe that need for support,

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that desire to keep pushing your own limits,

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maybe that's actually part of what keeps us going.

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It's that balance between being comfortable

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and being challenged that makes us want to grow,

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whether you're a young fencer just starting out

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or, like, an Olympic athlete going for gold.

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It makes you wonder, though,

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if this approach works in sports, in our personal lives,

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even in our careers, what if we brought that, like,

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that sweet spot mindset to everything?

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Our communities, workplaces, schools.

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Wow, yeah.

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Just imagine creating places where people feel supported

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to take risks, to really go for it, to learn and grow

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without being terrified of failing.

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That's what it's all about, right?

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Helping people reach their full potential,

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whatever that looks like for them.

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Absolutely. And you know what?

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It starts with us.

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With how we treat the people around us,

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our kids, our friends, our coworkers,

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it's about fostering that growth mindset,

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focusing on the effort more than the outcome

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and remembering that the journey is just as important

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as the destination.

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Couldn't have said it better myself.

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So to all our listeners out there,

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wherever you are on your own journey, remember,

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you are capable of amazing things, embrace the challenges,

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celebrate those victories big and small,

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and never be afraid to ask for a helping hand

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when you need it.

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And hey, while you're at it, maybe take a second to think,

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how can you create that sweet spot

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for someone else in your life?

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Love that, paying it forward,

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creating that ripple effect of growth and encouragement.

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So powerful.

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Couldn't agree more.

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Well, deep divers,

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we've reached the end of our time today,

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but the best part about a deep dive

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is that it always leaves us with even more to explore, right?

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So take these ideas, let them roll around in your mind

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and see where they take you.

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Until next time, keep diving deep

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into all those fascinating corners of knowledge.