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Hello friends, welcome back to another episode. Our guest today is Matthew Gere. He is a philosophy

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teacher, real estate investor, and business owner. The modern world has done away with

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traditional gender roles, and many wonder what role they should play as man or woman.

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Have we lost anything by eliminating strict gender roles in society? Today, we'll discuss

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what Gere thinks is wrong with the modern conception of masculinity, his experience learning from

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masculine role models, the drawbacks of traditional masculinity, why it's so hard to find a life

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partner, his struggles with suppressing fear and sadness, and much more. If you're enjoying these

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episodes, I'd ask you to do one small favor for me. This show only grows from word of mouth,

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so please go ahead and share it with someone that you know, be it on your feed, or with a friend,

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family member, or colleague who you think will enjoy it as much as you did. Thank you for listening.

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Welcome on Gere. Thank you David. Good to have you here. Good to be here. What's wrong with modern

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masculinity? Wow, just starting deep. Modern masculinity. Are you asking what's wrong with

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our conception of masculinity, or what's wrong with males, or both? Both. It seems like there's been,

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or at least you would believe that there's something we've been, we've lost along the way

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in masculinity. Like young men aren't really masculine anymore. I mean, I don't know a lot

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of young men, but I've heard, I mean the ones I'm around, like you, you seem like you've embraced

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masculinity. Somewhat masculine. I also have a nose piercing and earrings. I don't dress well, so

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yeah, it takes away from me. I don't think those things are anti-masculine. No, no, no,

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they're like not conventional masculinity. Right? So there's been like some positives towards people

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being more able to be themselves as opposed to constricting towards just like this one conventionally

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masculine thing where it's like, I'm hard, I'm like rustic, I like wood, I like guns, and that's it.

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That's the whole thing, and knives. Sports maybe. Maybe that's more modern. That is probably. Like

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your classic, easily masculine man wouldn't be super into sports. Like why are you like watching

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what about playing sports? Oh yeah, that would be. I guess what century do you think is the,

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are we looking at? Well, which one do you think had the ideal of masculinity?

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I mean, in many ways, the conception of man,

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males and females probably was best when Christianity was most embraced. So the

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medieval period, even though there's a lot of crazy shit that went on in the medieval period,

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the mentality probably understood what, you know, males and females are, or what they should be,

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or what they should strive to be. But yeah, certainly there were, like I said, crazy shit

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that happened. And I'd like your point, like, of discovering who you really are, not being afraid

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to explore and embrace yourself. And so if we had a period where people felt pressured to

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be conventional excessively, I think that is a problem. So yeah, I guess I don't want to

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be too hard on modern males or modern mentality of masculinity, but I think that

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I mean, we were talking before the podcast about telos, which you hadn't heard of. So telos,

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this is a Greek word meaning the end or the goal. So yeah, how do we know what a thing is? Well,

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one of the things is, at least in Aristotelian terms, is what is the final cause? What is the

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purpose for which something was made? And that's how we can often discover what it is, what it

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should be. And so what is the purpose of the chair? What is the end the chair Smith had in mind?

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It's fulfilling its purpose, I think, pretty well right now. It's giving us the ability to sit and

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relax. So what is the goal? What do the telos of a male or a female? And often we can know,

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obviously, males and females share many things, but we also have differences. So we can know

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what we are by looking at females and by looking at how we share with them and how we differ.

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And I think one of the things that's maybe too cliche, a little too cliche, but we're

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physically stronger typically, right? So we can know what we are by looking at females,

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but we're physically stronger typically, right? Obviously there are exceptions. There's plenty

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of women who can lift more than a lot of men, but in general, if a man works out, trains,

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the same activity a female does, he can be better than the average female. The average

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males are going to be better than average females. We'll say that. Yeah, they'll be stronger.

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They'll have more bone density, be faster, etc. Exactly. Obviously there are elite women who are

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better than 90% of elite men, but there's no elite women that are better than elite men.

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And so average women in that sport are typically not as good as average men. So what does that

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strength mean? Is there a reason that we were built to be stronger than women? That's my question.

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So if we get to the ultimate end of it, what is the purpose of a man? What does it tell us?

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Yeah, I guess in many ways it's to embrace that strength and to use it for the good, to help

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others, to help the women in his life. Hopefully there's some women in his life. He has a mom,

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he gets married, he has a wife, I think he gets married to a woman, he has a wife, he has daughters,

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and then ultimately to teach his boys, if he has boys, to then become men and repeat. So protection,

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protection, building things. Again, these are all cliche things. And I think most boys, if you leave

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them to, if you give them all the options, they're going to enjoy things like building things,

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fighting things that require strength and courage. And so should we nurture that or should we

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discourage it? I guess that's the question. Well, do you think we are discouraging men to be courageous

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and strong? I think somewhat. I think you also have to recognize that we have a telos, we have

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a goal, but we also have forces acting against us. And so one of those forces is comfort and laziness.

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So is it easy to fall into like, you know, laziness and eating shitty food and just following your

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whims? Absolutely. But does that make us happy? I guess that's the question. I mean, whenever I

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tried to live like that, I'm less happy than when I live with excellence and discipline myself.

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And again, you hear guys like Joe Rogan preach this all day. So maybe it's becoming too cliche,

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like, just be disciplined, be a man. Like, yeah, but I don't think he's, you don't hear a lot of

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guys saying, I tried that. I tried. I was so disciplined in my 20s, and I was unhappy. And so

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now in my 30s, I'm just morbidly obese. And I just follow my emotions and do whatever the fuck I want.

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And I'm so much more happy. I don't see a bunch of dudes saying that. So I think he's onto something.

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But wouldn't you, like, we have these things like food that's easily available, fast food,

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all these things that push for comfort and make life easier for us. Right. But we wouldn't want

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that for men or women, right? Like a woman should also not be lazy and be correct. Eating unhealthy

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food and doing all these things. So like, how is this an attack on masculinity?

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I mean, yeah, it's attack on humanity. So yeah, but I think for a man to be, to give into that

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is perhaps more unnatural or more offensive, if you will, to, for a man to just be,

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you know, soft and just seeking comfort. I think there is parts, you know, a woman,

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we could, we could explore her. What gifts was she given? It seems like women have been given

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the gift of like empathy and sensitivity, you know, the nurturing aspect. Why? Probably because

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they're going to, you know, bring up children. They're going to be the main, and by main, I don't

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mean like she has to do 99% of the work, but she's got boobs and she's going to breastfeed, right?

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She's going to, she's going to carry the child for nine months, deliver the child and then

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breastfeed the child for months. Men cannot do any of those things. Maybe that's controversial now,

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but it's probably not to you. So, so she's been giving the gift of empathy to the child.

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So, so she's been giving these, these abilities that are innate to her. So being more like,

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being more emotional or more aware of like a child's emotional needs, I think is a good thing.

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My ideal is if I raised a bunch of boys by myself, I would be training them to be like

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300 soldiers from like day one. And I don't, I think that would really fuck up a child.

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Like you're trying to fight with a sword at two years old. Oh yeah. Yeah. So like,

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if I ever get married and have children, hopefully their mom will not let me do that from an early

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age or maybe like limit that, that time that I spend in warrior training and she'll teach him

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how to be, you know, empathetic and maybe enjoy life's delicacies. And I think that's a gift that

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women have that, that men often don't. And again, I'm speaking in crazy stereotypes, I know, but

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that's, I think if we just look at what, what the differences are,

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and maybe I'm taking them to the extreme, but like that seems there's some element of, of us

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that has that purpose. Now again, if, if there's a, if there's a male who's more sensitive and,

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and you know, the finer arts and he marries a woman that's more like athletic and into fitness,

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is that a problem? No, I don't, I don't think that's a problem. Like a woman can teach

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her children how to do athletics and sports and be, be tough. And a, a dad can teach his children

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how to like, you know, be musical and artistic and emotional and empathetic. That's not, I'm not

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saying like, oh, it's disordered. There are exceptions, of course, but in general that it

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seems like that's how things are. So what are we losing then? Or what have we lost? I think most

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guys I know are, tend to be on the assert, more assertive side, more masculine, maybe like lifting

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weights, et cetera, stuff like that. So are we losing masculinity? Not necessarily. Like again,

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as long as you, as long as we're giving boys and girls the freedom to explore the things they want

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to do and not shame them for the things they want to do, assuming the things they want to do are

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like not, they're generally socially acceptable, right? Like we shouldn't encourage like, you know,

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being a bully and doing crazy physical harm to the other. So, so yeah, as long as we're like

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giving boys the opportunity, but I don't know that we often are. And I don't know if like for me, I

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didn't have a strong male role model and maybe I don't have it. Maybe I shouldn't like

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be upset because I eventually did. I didn't see had football coaches and wrestling coaches in high

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school. Before that, I didn't have a lot of like great male role models. And so I didn't really

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know how to explore how to be like a virtuous man. But again, I think I turned out all right. So

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maybe, maybe I, maybe there isn't a problem. Maybe we have, maybe things are the way they should be.

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And like you said, there's, there's plenty of guys who are into the things that are stereotypical,

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stereotypically masculine and, and vice versa. And I think, I think more and more you see, you see

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guys who are unashamedly like exploring that. The question is, are, are women in the same situation

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as men into those guys?

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You don't think women are into guys who are maybe more emotional, more artistic?

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No, no, the opposite. In fact, I think modern, often we've, we've maybe trained our girls to

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kind of want to take charge, which is again, a female who's like a badass kicks ass, like can

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be nothing wrong with that. But if she's taught to fear a guy who's like, who's a leader or who,

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I don't know, has strong, strong views and has a strong, I guess, sense of masculinity,

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that might be a problem. Yeah.

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But I mean, in the end, we, we just know the people we know, right? Otherwise we're like

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watching fucking TV and we see things online and we hear all these problems. You hear Jordan

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Peterson talk about all this shit and they're like, oh, all these, these men that are, don't

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know how to be men. Yeah. And I, part of me believes it, but maybe not. Maybe he's full of shit.

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Jordan Peterson's just, I mean, just saying shit to make money. The thing is that they probably

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exist, but they probably don't interact with the world very much. Right? Yeah. Like you're,

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you're classically man who doesn't know how to be a man might be inside, like playing video games,

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watching pornography, maybe like grinding on some goal that they want to do, but they're like not

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really interacting with the world, not being social. Yeah. So like, it's probably very hard

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to actually observe these types of guys who exist. Yeah. I mean, I, I, I guess I can say I've,

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I've had a number of roommates who like, don't seem to want to do the things that I like to do.

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Maybe they want to, they just don't do it. Yeah. Like I've had a garage gym for like 15 years

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and I've probably had maybe 15 different roommates in the past 15 years and none of them have really

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like gotten excited about working out, but it could be I'm intimidating or they don't feel like

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it's their domain, but they're not lifting like it at another gym. So, and again, lifting weights

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isn't like the, the end of the, of being a man, but you think there'd be at least one or two,

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especially when instead they're often playing video games or watching TV or, you know, so I think,

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I think if we compare like not to be too judgmental, but if, if you compare activities like video games

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versus working out, and I'm not saying video games are bad, but if you, if you spend two hours a day

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working out versus two hours a day playing video games and that's all you had time, free time for.

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And of course you could have other, you could spend two hours, I don't know, meditating, two hours

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being with a girl, like obviously you have time to do, if you have two hours of free time,

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I'm going to compare video games versus working out. I would love to have a debate on what,

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which is better because I'm, I'm a hundred percent certain.

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Well, I don't know if anyone would make the argument that playing video games is better

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than working out for two hours.

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Okay. There we go. So I think that's maybe not controversial, but maybe I'm biased because I

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work out and I don't play video games. So I'm not saying like, if you, if you worked out like five

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days a week and then two days, you played video games, I think that's, that's fine. But if like

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every day you had that choice and you only played video games, I think again, you're to me, you're

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kind of falling into that. Like I'm going to do what's easy. Yeah. And it doesn't take a lot of

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discipline to sit and play video games. Yeah. I mean, at least my opinion is that the greater

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attack on men isn't really just like we're losing masculinity. I think it, most men want to go,

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like, I don't know, they want to work at something and help people and do all of these things that

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are masculine. They want to provide, but the pornography and video games are kind of what

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attracts. Yeah. Yeah. That would distract them. And video games one gives you the opportunity to

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video games one gives you this sense of progression, the sense of growth, which is

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something that as a man, you might be trying to get when you're going out into the world. Yeah.

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And then pornography gets you this sense of, Oh, I'm getting, I'm having sex. I'm like doing well,

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automating market. I'm like, I'm doing well, right? Like it simulates it, but you're not actually,

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you're not talking to any girls. You're not actually being out in the world and doing that.

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Right. So I think it actually comes down to the kind of these two things that

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attract men and nobody's really figured out how do you, if you're stuck there, how do you even

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really move past that? Like you're addicted to pornography or video games. Yeah. Yeah. So you're

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asking me how to get out of that? I don't know. Maybe you know, maybe we need none of us know.

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And it's just a dilemma that we're stuck in. Um, I mean, I think there are kind of time-tested

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things. Like you just got to like do it in a way like, or you have an accountability partner, like

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obviously everyone has some free time. And so if you're like debating whether I should work out

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right now or should I sit at my computer and check my email and you know what's going to happen next,

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but it's so easy to do that. It's so easy. So I'd say accountability partners, like,

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I mean, if you don't know a man in your life or a woman or somebody in your life, who's willing to

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like, like tell you some hard truths, then call me or call David. And basically what I would say

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is like every time you look at porn, you have to like do something like 10 pushups, like something

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small. It doesn't have to be crazy. And eventually like you're going to build up like at a certain

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point, you're probably say, well, rather than looking at porn, I'm just going to do the pushups

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or rather than looking at porn, I'm going to go actually do a workout. So I think the hardest

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thing is getting started for a lot of people. Like how do I start? I don't know how to do anything.

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I don't know. I can't do a pushup or I can't, I'm too fat. I can't do a sit up. Well, there's,

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there's plenty of other things you do. So maybe that's part of it. I don't know. Maybe we should

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talk to someone who's like overcome it because I, I never had a strong addiction to pornography.

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I've played a lot of video games in my youth, but ultimately sports were a lot more attractive.

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Once I, you know, started real sports and I didn't really have time for video games, I chose sports

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over video games. And I think that's kind of the natural progression with a lot of males is I'm

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either going to like spend time with my kids and my wife or my girlfriend or play video games. Well,

191
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my wife and kids are much more attractive than video games. So that's the natural progression

192
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for a single man. Yeah, that's where you don't have those, those things calling you.

193
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You have to use other things like again, an accountability partner or, you know, a roommate,

194
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like hopefully one of your roommates is like halfway like open to like becoming a better

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person and you just have a deal like, Hey, my door shut and it's during the day. I'm probably

196
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watching porn. So knock on my door. I never had that problem when I had a roommate. I mean, I

197
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shared a room. Oh, there you go. There was no way to do that. Where did everyone watch the porn?

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I don't know, dude. Yeah. Just on like in their phone. I think, I think my roommate was hiding

199
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in the corner. What was that like when you didn't have a male role model?

200
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Before you got into sports, how did you navigate the world? I mean, I still played sports, but I

201
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didn't have, and I had probably had some great coaches growing up, but I just didn't get to know

202
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them in a way that I did in high school. I don't know. I guess I was just a normal boy, but I,

203
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I didn't aspire to anything great until, until I met some of these men in high school and then

204
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I'm like, Oh, I want to be like, I want to be as strong as, you know, coach Nance or is like,

205
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you know, as crazy, you know, of a tackler, like just, just a killer mentality is

206
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coach Robin. These are football coaches. So

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and then they seemed like, you know, good men off the football field, like, Oh, this guy's a good dad.

208
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Like, okay, maybe there's something to that. So I mean, every, I think every kid's a little lost,

209
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but, and so I mean, I didn't know what I didn't know. So I don't know if that answers your

210
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question. Yeah, I guess I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm

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just asking your question. Yeah. I guess I'm more curious on what the effect was in the real world

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that they actually had on you and how you went through the world. Like once I once I met them or

213
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like, what does gear look like having never met these people? What does gear look like?

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Wow. If I never met any of the, like the, the people I look up to or looked up to,

215
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yeah, maybe I would have been one of those Intel video gamer, you know, gamers, who,

216
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But I probably would have killed myself.

217
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I mean, no offense to anyone who's a gamer or an incel, but I just know like...

218
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And me, I don't know.

219
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It's a good question.

220
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Like if I would have just been raised by like women who never played athletics, did sports,

221
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like with my body, I've not craved it as much.

222
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I don't know.

223
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I mean when I look at guys who just like can like go week in and week out without like

224
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doing anything physical, I'm like I'm just amazed because if I go more than a day or

225
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two without doing something physical, I get restless and I just want to like do something.

226
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Do something that like...

227
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So is it just a matter of like that's my genetics or that's...

228
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Or did I train myself to need that?

229
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I don't know.

230
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I mean, do you have an opinion?

231
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I think you might have had this innate desire to do that anyways.

232
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I'm more curious as to like you're growing up.

233
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Yeah, sorry.

234
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That is kind of a tangent.

235
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So if I never met these men...

236
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Like did you have like moments where you were like, oh, I want to do this, but I look up

237
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to this guy so I'm going to do this other thing instead.

238
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I remember like in...I remember my eighth grade year, I got kicked out of eighth grade

239
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and went to a different school and so I didn't have a sport.

240
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I think I probably ran like track normally in the spring.

241
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So I played football in the fall, played basketball for my first school and then I got kicked

242
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out in like second semester, started a new school.

243
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And I was just a new kid and I didn't...probably it was too late to register for track or something.

244
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So I didn't play anything second semester of eighth grade year and I just remember being

245
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so like just so restless and I didn't really know how to work out.

246
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Like I knew how to do pushups and sit-ups but it wasn't much and I didn't really like

247
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have that discipline.

248
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I just remember sitting around watching TV and life just seemed terrible.

249
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And of course I was in a new place.

250
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So yeah, I probably was kind of depressed.

251
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So I would think I would just be depressed and that's why I say I would kill myself.

252
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You can only take so much depression where you're just like this is life sucks.

253
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I want this to end.

254
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So I don't think I...I mean it's kind of like dramatic but I don't know if I'd be alive

255
00:26:14,040 --> 00:26:20,720
if I didn't find like an outlet to deal with like this angst.

256
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And of course it's not just like I work out and so now I have purpose.

257
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I can get depressed if I don't have purpose besides working out.

258
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I've had times when I just work out four hours a day and I don't have like a bigger purpose

259
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in my life and I get kind of depressed.

260
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I mean I feel good.

261
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I get that endorphin fix for that time but then outside of that I'm like what's the point

262
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of life?

263
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So I need, I think I need, I need both.

264
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Like a purpose like I need that physical exertion and like a bigger picture purpose.

265
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And so without meeting these people I don't know that I would have been inspired to look

266
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towards something bigger.

267
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What did that actually look like?

268
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Like what did they provide you actually that was what made you have find this larger P

269
00:27:15,460 --> 00:27:18,080
purpose and how did you even find that larger P purpose?

270
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Like you knew these guys and you think they're cool, you think they're awesome.

271
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But what was that internal experience actually like?

272
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I mean ultimately it wasn't just them.

273
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It was meeting like Jesus, having an encounter with God that gave me ultimate, ultimate purpose.

274
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Because you can only have so much worldly success and life is still meaningless without

275
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like an ultimate, because you're all, we're all going to die unless we, someone figures

276
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out you know how to live forever.

277
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But we haven't yet so we're all going to die.

278
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What's going to happen after?

279
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Who the fuck knows?

280
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But Jesus claimed to and Christians claim to so it makes life like, it makes life, it

281
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makes this world worth living.

282
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Like I want to be the best version of myself in this life so that I can be an even better

283
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version of myself in the next.

284
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So they ultimately and of course not all of them directly but indirectly showed me that

285
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there's something that gives meaning to everything.

286
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And so that's it.

287
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I mean Jesus.

288
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What do you think your purpose is?

289
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It's crazy that I probably haven't fully figured it out.

290
00:28:46,760 --> 00:28:51,440
I mean probably no one has until they die but like you know I'm unmarried.

291
00:28:51,440 --> 00:28:55,280
I'd love to get married and have kids and I think that serves a purpose for a lot of

292
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people and rightly so.

293
00:28:58,080 --> 00:29:05,360
It's an incredible endeavor to marry somebody, to say I'll be with you forever no matter

294
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what and then make new people with them and make them hopefully good people.

295
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So I'm hoping that's part of my purpose.

296
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You know even that's probably limited.

297
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Like if that's your only purpose is to reproduce.

298
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I mean that's a noble purpose.

299
00:29:29,200 --> 00:29:37,680
But I think most people have even not bigger but other purposes than that.

300
00:29:37,680 --> 00:29:38,680
I don't know.

301
00:29:38,680 --> 00:29:45,360
I mean you look at like and not to get too like biblical or you know Christian but I

302
00:29:45,360 --> 00:29:49,840
think the Bible, the Old Testament especially shows a lot of people, a lot of like prophets

303
00:29:49,840 --> 00:29:55,400
who are like trying to figure out what the hell did God put me here for and I like Samson

304
00:29:55,400 --> 00:30:01,000
maybe because I don't know he's a strong dude and he got the girl but he really didn't

305
00:30:01,000 --> 00:30:05,280
know his purpose until like his last minutes.

306
00:30:05,280 --> 00:30:11,280
Like his strength was given to him to like topple the pagan temple and he was searching

307
00:30:11,280 --> 00:30:14,200
his whole life for that purpose.

308
00:30:14,200 --> 00:30:18,680
So with some people they have the luxury of knowing their whole life like this is why

309
00:30:18,680 --> 00:30:21,480
I was put on this earth and I'm going to do it.

310
00:30:21,480 --> 00:30:24,480
Others have to wait till like the last minute.

311
00:30:24,480 --> 00:30:29,880
And I hope eventually everyone figures that out.

312
00:30:29,880 --> 00:30:33,640
Maybe that's a tragedy is when people have lived their whole life and never discovered

313
00:30:33,640 --> 00:30:37,160
and die without that discovery.

314
00:30:37,160 --> 00:30:40,120
So I can't say I know for sure.

315
00:30:40,120 --> 00:30:46,720
I mean maybe people from the outside can be like well here you've been given these traits.

316
00:30:46,720 --> 00:30:52,800
You were put here in Broomfield or you came to Broomfield for this reason.

317
00:30:52,800 --> 00:30:55,360
Maybe they can see things better than I and they can tell me.

318
00:30:55,360 --> 00:30:59,440
But I mean for a time I was a teacher and I really enjoyed that.

319
00:30:59,440 --> 00:31:04,640
Hopefully I had an effect on people, a positive effect.

320
00:31:04,640 --> 00:31:08,060
And I might go back to teaching someday but let's say I don't.

321
00:31:08,060 --> 00:31:10,800
Hopefully I change some lives there.

322
00:31:10,800 --> 00:31:16,360
So I think I see glimpses of purpose but nothing like no big picture yet.

323
00:31:16,360 --> 00:31:22,040
Yeah and you're kind of in this place now where you don't really have any obligations

324
00:31:22,040 --> 00:31:25,720
in your life which like maybe a lot of people strive to.

325
00:31:25,720 --> 00:31:27,560
Like a lot of people save for retirement.

326
00:31:27,560 --> 00:31:31,640
They're like I can't wait till the day where I can do nothing and just hang out and then

327
00:31:31,640 --> 00:31:33,680
I'll figure out my purpose.

328
00:31:33,680 --> 00:31:38,200
But you're already in that position where you can sit around and contemplate what your

329
00:31:38,200 --> 00:31:40,720
purpose is and think about all these things.

330
00:31:40,720 --> 00:31:44,200
So is it useful to even strive to get to that position?

331
00:31:44,200 --> 00:31:48,520
Of having enough money so you can sit around?

332
00:31:48,520 --> 00:31:52,960
And is it even helpful for finding a purpose?

333
00:31:52,960 --> 00:31:54,320
Maybe.

334
00:31:54,320 --> 00:31:56,560
I think I mean I don't sit around much.

335
00:31:56,560 --> 00:32:01,720
That's what I get criticized a lot by some people is that I don't like to sit around.

336
00:32:01,720 --> 00:32:07,320
I mean I do think maybe I do think a lot while I'm doing things.

337
00:32:07,320 --> 00:32:14,360
But to answer your question I mean money certainly can't buy happiness but it sure can help in

338
00:32:14,360 --> 00:32:15,360
some ways.

339
00:32:15,360 --> 00:32:30,520
Like for people who are like just grinding and can't get ahead like having money to be

340
00:32:30,520 --> 00:32:33,200
ahead would be huge.

341
00:32:33,200 --> 00:32:38,400
But then for others having too much money is a curse.

342
00:32:38,400 --> 00:32:44,040
Especially if they can't if they're not self motivated or disciplined.

343
00:32:44,040 --> 00:32:48,640
Like then they do probably sleep in every day.

344
00:32:48,640 --> 00:32:50,400
They don't do a lot.

345
00:32:50,400 --> 00:32:52,480
It is kind of a curse.

346
00:32:52,480 --> 00:32:59,960
So I guess I'm grateful that I did have a period of my life where I had to grind financially

347
00:32:59,960 --> 00:33:02,840
and now I can reap the benefits.

348
00:33:02,840 --> 00:33:05,520
I'm not I'm certainly no multimillionaire.

349
00:33:05,520 --> 00:33:09,440
I just have enough to like to get by.

350
00:33:09,440 --> 00:33:10,440
Without working.

351
00:33:10,440 --> 00:33:11,440
Without working.

352
00:33:11,440 --> 00:33:19,040
I have a business that I don't have to give 40 hours a week to more like 10 or 15.

353
00:33:19,040 --> 00:33:20,520
And that's kind of where I wanted to be.

354
00:33:20,520 --> 00:33:23,320
I don't necessarily want a shit ton of money.

355
00:33:23,320 --> 00:33:25,240
I'd like to buy some more things.

356
00:33:25,240 --> 00:33:28,800
I'd love to buy some land and farm.

357
00:33:28,800 --> 00:33:31,800
Not like full scale farming but like raise some cattle and chickens.

358
00:33:31,800 --> 00:33:33,680
Yeah and then eat the chickens.

359
00:33:33,680 --> 00:33:34,680
Yeah.

360
00:33:34,680 --> 00:33:39,760
I mean my brother tried that with cows and he's much more committed than I am to that

361
00:33:39,760 --> 00:33:44,520
and he kind of gave up so it's probably a lot harder than I think but might as well

362
00:33:44,520 --> 00:33:46,000
try.

363
00:33:46,000 --> 00:33:50,480
So I have goals like that like you know and laying out here is not cheap.

364
00:33:50,480 --> 00:33:53,840
But your main goal right now is to get married right?

365
00:33:53,840 --> 00:33:55,260
I think so.

366
00:33:55,260 --> 00:33:58,920
And why do you think you haven't made it there yet?

367
00:33:58,920 --> 00:34:04,640
I was talking with a mutual friend who was like bro if Keir isn't married like there's

368
00:34:04,640 --> 00:34:06,680
no chance for any of us.

369
00:34:06,680 --> 00:34:11,280
Because theoretically you're like in this position, you have a lot of time to yourself,

370
00:34:11,280 --> 00:34:16,560
you can spend a lot of time on dating, you don't really have to grind for any cash, you're

371
00:34:16,560 --> 00:34:19,640
already fine there and like you're jacked.

372
00:34:19,640 --> 00:34:23,200
You're a decently attractive guy.

373
00:34:23,200 --> 00:34:27,040
All these different things that people would be like oh I just have to get there and then

374
00:34:27,040 --> 00:34:29,520
I can get married and I'll settle down right?

375
00:34:29,520 --> 00:34:33,360
Like you have all those things that maybe a lot of young men would say they have to

376
00:34:33,360 --> 00:34:37,000
get before they can settle down and get married.

377
00:34:37,000 --> 00:34:40,360
So what do you think is going on?

378
00:34:40,360 --> 00:34:42,880
Yeah I used to think that too.

379
00:34:42,880 --> 00:34:46,120
Like you used to think you had to?

380
00:34:46,120 --> 00:34:53,040
Yeah acquire a certain amount of wealth, be in a certain amount of shape, have a certain

381
00:34:53,040 --> 00:35:03,120
amount of like I don't know social aptitude which I think to some degree is true.

382
00:35:03,120 --> 00:35:15,180
But I think probably the biggest quality is a willingness to love someone no matter what

383
00:35:15,180 --> 00:35:22,880
and have the time, or not the time, have the willingness to give the time.

384
00:35:22,880 --> 00:35:29,600
And so I think probably one of my problems is because I wanted to like better myself,

385
00:35:29,600 --> 00:35:37,600
I wasn't as focused on giving time to another especially a girlfriend.

386
00:35:37,600 --> 00:35:39,080
And so yeah you can get selfish.

387
00:35:39,080 --> 00:35:46,640
You can get like because I obviously have a lot of free time but I also want to do certain

388
00:35:46,640 --> 00:35:47,640
things every day.

389
00:35:47,640 --> 00:35:51,680
Like I want to get enough sleep, I want to eat the right food, I want to work out.

390
00:35:51,680 --> 00:35:59,360
And if any of those things start to lack I get anxious and like it's a problem.

391
00:35:59,360 --> 00:36:03,240
So are you addicted to bettering yourself?

392
00:36:03,240 --> 00:36:04,240
Maybe.

393
00:36:04,240 --> 00:36:06,040
And there's no space for anyone else?

394
00:36:06,040 --> 00:36:08,920
I wouldn't say that.

395
00:36:08,920 --> 00:36:20,880
There's probably not a willingness to give up everything which I think you kind of need.

396
00:36:20,880 --> 00:36:22,120
It's not that you have to give up.

397
00:36:22,120 --> 00:36:27,120
Like obviously married people sleep and eat and some work out.

398
00:36:27,120 --> 00:36:35,320
They stop after that.

399
00:36:35,320 --> 00:36:40,920
But it's like you come at least second.

400
00:36:40,920 --> 00:36:45,920
Once a child gets there it's third or fourth or fifth.

401
00:36:45,920 --> 00:36:51,920
And I guess I'd like to think I'm willing to do that but my last relationship I felt

402
00:36:51,920 --> 00:36:54,120
like I was there.

403
00:36:54,120 --> 00:36:58,060
Maybe she didn't, maybe that's why it didn't work out.

404
00:36:58,060 --> 00:37:04,040
But I thought that I was there and if like the next…if I have the same attitude that

405
00:37:04,040 --> 00:37:10,640
I had with her, I have that with like the next girl and that fails and then I try again

406
00:37:10,640 --> 00:37:13,280
and that fails then at a certain point I'd say like I'm the problem.

407
00:37:13,280 --> 00:37:14,280
Something's wrong with you.

408
00:37:14,280 --> 00:37:15,280
Yeah.

409
00:37:15,280 --> 00:37:19,680
I am unwilling to give what it takes.

410
00:37:19,680 --> 00:37:26,360
But I think not everyone requires the same amount of like your time.

411
00:37:26,360 --> 00:37:30,840
There are plenty of women who also want to get plenty of sleep, want to eat the right

412
00:37:30,840 --> 00:37:34,360
food and want to work out every day.

413
00:37:34,360 --> 00:37:39,680
And so like time alone might only be like a good hour a day.

414
00:37:39,680 --> 00:37:44,120
Whereas other women it might be like no we need like a quality quality like two to three

415
00:37:44,120 --> 00:37:45,120
hours a day.

416
00:37:45,120 --> 00:37:48,920
I mean some women it's like one hour a week maybe or two hours a week.

417
00:37:48,920 --> 00:37:54,800
So maybe my last relationship we were a little misaligned there.

418
00:37:54,800 --> 00:37:55,800
I don't know.

419
00:37:55,800 --> 00:38:00,000
This is where it's like I'm kind of in new territory where I'm really…I have

420
00:38:00,000 --> 00:38:09,360
the time, the money and at least I think I have a willingness to try and I guess we'll

421
00:38:09,360 --> 00:38:10,360
see.

422
00:38:10,360 --> 00:38:11,360
We'll see how the next one goes.

423
00:38:11,360 --> 00:38:12,800
Now you have no excuses right?

424
00:38:12,800 --> 00:38:13,800
I don't know.

425
00:38:13,800 --> 00:38:14,800
I don't have enough money.

426
00:38:14,800 --> 00:38:15,800
I don't have enough time.

427
00:38:15,800 --> 00:38:19,960
I mean if some girl is looking for a gold digger with like 10 million then I'm not

428
00:38:19,960 --> 00:38:20,960
the man for her.

429
00:38:20,960 --> 00:38:22,560
But that's not the person you want anyways.

430
00:38:22,560 --> 00:38:25,000
Like you have enough money to get by.

431
00:38:25,000 --> 00:38:27,760
Yeah to take her out a few times a week.

432
00:38:27,760 --> 00:38:32,360
It's very easy to cope with those things where you're like oh I can't date because

433
00:38:32,360 --> 00:38:33,360
I don't have the money.

434
00:38:33,360 --> 00:38:38,000
It's like there's plenty of guys who date and don't work at McDonald's right?

435
00:38:38,000 --> 00:38:39,000
Absolutely.

436
00:38:39,000 --> 00:38:40,560
That's not a limiting factor.

437
00:38:40,560 --> 00:38:41,560
Don't have the time.

438
00:38:41,560 --> 00:38:43,360
They work 12 hours a day and they still date.

439
00:38:43,360 --> 00:38:46,000
It's very easy to hide behind these things.

440
00:38:46,000 --> 00:38:47,760
Yep and I probably did in the past.

441
00:38:47,760 --> 00:38:53,280
Do you think you wish you dated more in the past and kind of didn't grind as hard as

442
00:38:53,280 --> 00:38:55,160
you did?

443
00:38:55,160 --> 00:38:57,200
Not necessarily.

444
00:38:57,200 --> 00:39:04,000
The only reason I would say yes is if I have gotten to a place where I'm unable to like

445
00:39:04,000 --> 00:39:05,960
pivot.

446
00:39:05,960 --> 00:39:13,280
If I am really that possessive of my time and I'm completely unable to change which

447
00:39:13,280 --> 00:39:18,160
I don't think any human is unable to change if they're willing.

448
00:39:18,160 --> 00:39:23,720
So only if that was the case would I have regretted.

449
00:39:23,720 --> 00:39:25,960
I mean some say I want to have kids and I prime my life.

450
00:39:25,960 --> 00:39:27,660
Well maybe the prime is still here.

451
00:39:27,660 --> 00:39:33,080
Maybe if you keep working out your prime is through your 60s and 70s.

452
00:39:33,080 --> 00:39:36,320
So that's my hope.

453
00:39:36,320 --> 00:39:42,040
Do you think you would have had an easier time maybe if you like found someone when

454
00:39:42,040 --> 00:39:46,240
you were younger and kind of got here together with them?

455
00:39:46,240 --> 00:39:52,080
Yeah I mean that's what they say is if you marry young you're so ignorant and you just

456
00:39:52,080 --> 00:39:53,080
grow together.

457
00:39:53,080 --> 00:39:54,080
You'll figure it out.

458
00:39:54,080 --> 00:39:55,080
You'll figure it out.

459
00:39:55,080 --> 00:40:05,440
I guess my fear, well I mean I shouldn't have a fear because it didn't happen but like let's

460
00:40:05,440 --> 00:40:17,280
say I did get married at 19 and my 90 year old married self becomes my age and we meet.

461
00:40:17,280 --> 00:40:22,440
And like if I like that man better than I like myself I'd be like yeah, hell yeah.

462
00:40:22,440 --> 00:40:32,160
But if I'm like bro like you're broke and you're divorced and you're pathetic then of

463
00:40:32,160 --> 00:40:34,120
course I'm glad I didn't do that.

464
00:40:34,120 --> 00:40:36,520
So I guess it's hard to say.

465
00:40:36,520 --> 00:40:42,560
I could see how certainly marriage is good for you and could have made me a better man

466
00:40:42,560 --> 00:40:52,360
absolutely but it could also like if you don't marry well then it can really fuck you up.

467
00:40:52,360 --> 00:40:54,480
It can destroy your life.

468
00:40:54,480 --> 00:40:59,320
And I didn't really have anyone in my life to like make sure that I was going after the

469
00:40:59,320 --> 00:41:00,800
right girls.

470
00:41:00,800 --> 00:41:03,920
So I guess my fear would be I would have married someone that was bad for me.

471
00:41:03,920 --> 00:41:04,920
Married the wrong person?

472
00:41:04,920 --> 00:41:05,920
Yeah.

473
00:41:05,920 --> 00:41:08,720
Do you still think you'll marry the wrong person?

474
00:41:08,720 --> 00:41:09,920
I don't think so.

475
00:41:09,920 --> 00:41:18,600
I mean if a girl is willing to like date me and she sees what I'm all about she's probably

476
00:41:18,600 --> 00:41:24,720
going to be pretty aligned with me or she's going to pretend for a while and then eventually

477
00:41:24,720 --> 00:41:26,880
be aligned with me.

478
00:41:26,880 --> 00:41:27,880
Like I don't know.

479
00:41:27,880 --> 00:41:34,780
I don't see myself like meeting a girl who's like a stronger personality in me and has

480
00:41:34,780 --> 00:41:38,640
a much different lifestyle and like having me conform to hers.

481
00:41:38,640 --> 00:41:45,760
But you never know.

482
00:41:45,760 --> 00:41:49,920
Are you kind of asking the same from the woman's side?

483
00:41:49,920 --> 00:41:52,960
What do you mean?

484
00:41:52,960 --> 00:41:56,960
Or you said you won't date someone who's kind of wanting you to conform to their way of

485
00:41:56,960 --> 00:41:57,960
doing things?

486
00:41:57,960 --> 00:41:58,960
Yeah.

487
00:41:58,960 --> 00:42:01,480
I think ideally I find a woman who's who are pretty much aligned.

488
00:42:01,480 --> 00:42:02,480
Okay.

489
00:42:02,480 --> 00:42:04,160
And they don't have to conform.

490
00:42:04,160 --> 00:42:05,160
No.

491
00:42:05,160 --> 00:42:09,440
But you think that's possible to find one person where you don't have to give anything

492
00:42:09,440 --> 00:42:10,440
away?

493
00:42:10,440 --> 00:42:11,440
You have to certainly give.

494
00:42:11,440 --> 00:42:12,440
No.

495
00:42:12,440 --> 00:42:13,440
You have to give.

496
00:42:13,440 --> 00:42:20,320
You have to give your emotional energy and there are going to be like changes in me for

497
00:42:20,320 --> 00:42:21,560
sure.

498
00:42:21,560 --> 00:42:23,600
But if she's like you can't work out.

499
00:42:23,600 --> 00:42:25,600
I would laugh.

500
00:42:25,600 --> 00:42:28,760
That would be pretty extreme.

501
00:42:28,760 --> 00:42:29,760
Yeah.

502
00:42:29,760 --> 00:42:39,480
Or you can't I guess we have to like 10x our net worth and like buy a huge fucking mansion

503
00:42:39,480 --> 00:42:46,080
and eat like the premier foods and like have like a housekeeper and I would laugh like no

504
00:42:46,080 --> 00:42:50,960
we're like I'm not going to I'm not going to 10x my I mean I could hit a big sure on

505
00:42:50,960 --> 00:42:55,640
one of my investments but like we're not going to let's not plan on that.

506
00:42:55,640 --> 00:42:58,560
Or if she's like you have to give everything away we're going to live in poverty.

507
00:42:58,560 --> 00:43:03,160
I would laugh like you know I like you can live as simply as you want but I'm going to

508
00:43:03,160 --> 00:43:04,160
keep my jam.

509
00:43:04,160 --> 00:43:10,080
I'm going to keep like I'm going to have a decent you know vehicle and like I want to

510
00:43:10,080 --> 00:43:11,640
have money to look for like trips.

511
00:43:11,640 --> 00:43:18,280
We don't have to live like luxuriously but luxuriously but so like I can think of all

512
00:43:18,280 --> 00:43:22,800
many things where a girl could say something and it's just obvious we're not aligned.

513
00:43:22,800 --> 00:43:23,800
Yeah.

514
00:43:23,800 --> 00:43:27,400
You know or no we're going to start you got to start doing marijuana with me and like

515
00:43:27,400 --> 00:43:32,520
getting drunk every night or we got to eat shitty food.

516
00:43:32,520 --> 00:43:34,440
We're going to eat it in and out every night.

517
00:43:34,440 --> 00:43:35,440
Become a stoner.

518
00:43:35,440 --> 00:43:37,120
That'd be pretty for the girl.

519
00:43:37,120 --> 00:43:38,120
Yeah.

520
00:43:38,120 --> 00:43:41,080
I don't think I don't think a girl's going to convince me of that.

521
00:43:41,080 --> 00:43:42,080
Yeah.

522
00:43:42,080 --> 00:43:44,120
So it's more of the values behind what you do.

523
00:43:44,120 --> 00:43:45,120
Yeah.

524
00:43:45,120 --> 00:43:46,120
Yeah.

525
00:43:46,120 --> 00:43:47,120
I think so.

526
00:43:47,120 --> 00:43:52,040
And like the faith question I think is huge like I mean I think I'm open to dating non-Catholics

527
00:43:52,040 --> 00:43:58,560
but again there's those the alignment would be would be tough.

528
00:43:58,560 --> 00:44:05,520
Like if she's an open person like I'm going to share with her what I think is true and

529
00:44:05,520 --> 00:44:09,840
she can share with me what she thinks is true and we'll see we'll see where it goes.

530
00:44:09,840 --> 00:44:12,960
I found this out about Aquinas the other day.

531
00:44:12,960 --> 00:44:18,080
He had four things that he kind of called the thing that were the apparent goods that

532
00:44:18,080 --> 00:44:20,280
people would kind of fall to and there was four of them.

533
00:44:20,280 --> 00:44:21,280
Yeah.

534
00:44:21,280 --> 00:44:22,280
Yeah.

535
00:44:22,280 --> 00:44:27,760
Which one of them was it was power wealth honor prestige status.

536
00:44:27,760 --> 00:44:33,800
And then the last one was another P word I think the pleasure pleasure pleasure power

537
00:44:33,800 --> 00:44:35,600
wealth and prestige.

538
00:44:35,600 --> 00:44:36,600
Yeah.

539
00:44:36,600 --> 00:44:37,600
Those are the four.

540
00:44:37,600 --> 00:44:38,600
Yeah.

541
00:44:38,600 --> 00:44:42,840
And so if you had to eliminate these one by one which one's the first one that you kind

542
00:44:42,840 --> 00:44:47,760
of get rid of so we can kind of find which one you're attached to the most which one

543
00:44:47,760 --> 00:44:48,760
I have gotten rid of.

544
00:44:48,760 --> 00:44:49,760
No.

545
00:44:49,760 --> 00:44:51,760
Which one would you get rid of you have these four things which one do you care the least

546
00:44:51,760 --> 00:44:57,320
about.

547
00:44:57,320 --> 00:44:59,640
I guess it depends on what you mean by pleasure.

548
00:44:59,640 --> 00:45:01,680
So power power wealth pleasure.

549
00:45:01,680 --> 00:45:08,320
What was the fourth and power wealth pleasure prestige prestige status status which is different

550
00:45:08,320 --> 00:45:09,320
than power.

551
00:45:09,320 --> 00:45:10,640
So it's OK.

552
00:45:10,640 --> 00:45:18,320
I would say yeah if by pleasure mean like oh I just need a soda like I just taste so

553
00:45:18,320 --> 00:45:23,360
good like that's not attractive but if it's like I need the pleasure of working out or

554
00:45:23,360 --> 00:45:29,560
the pleasure of seeing beautiful things but I think there's some pleasures that obvious

555
00:45:29,560 --> 00:45:33,120
that that are good that.

556
00:45:33,120 --> 00:45:37,200
So I think Aquinas I know Aquinas pretty well I think he's talking about disorder pleasures

557
00:45:37,200 --> 00:45:41,760
like the attachment to sinful pleasures.

558
00:45:41,760 --> 00:45:46,320
So so which one do you get rid of.

559
00:45:46,320 --> 00:45:47,320
I'd say sinful pleasures.

560
00:45:47,320 --> 00:45:48,320
OK.

561
00:45:48,320 --> 00:45:49,320
Yeah.

562
00:45:49,320 --> 00:45:51,840
When you have power prestige and wealth.

563
00:45:51,840 --> 00:45:52,840
Yeah.

564
00:45:52,840 --> 00:45:53,840
So what do you care rid of next.

565
00:45:53,840 --> 00:45:56,680
I really care for pleasure as much probably prestige next.

566
00:45:56,680 --> 00:45:57,680
OK.

567
00:45:57,680 --> 00:45:58,880
Don't give a fuck.

568
00:45:58,880 --> 00:46:00,920
You don't care to be liked by other people.

569
00:46:00,920 --> 00:46:05,880
I want to be like but I'd like to also but you would rather like to not get any folks.

570
00:46:05,880 --> 00:46:08,760
Yeah I'd rather I want to be liked by the right people.

571
00:46:08,760 --> 00:46:11,080
I want to be liked by people who are respectable.

572
00:46:11,080 --> 00:46:15,240
I want to be liked by the good by good people.

573
00:46:15,240 --> 00:46:22,280
So yeah I think just like a massive like a celebrity where everyone knows your name like

574
00:46:22,280 --> 00:46:26,960
that that's actually a huge burden that I don't think any celebrity actually wants once

575
00:46:26,960 --> 00:46:28,680
they have it.

576
00:46:28,680 --> 00:46:30,200
So I think that'd be easy to get rid of.

577
00:46:30,200 --> 00:46:32,280
And you have wealth and power left.

578
00:46:32,280 --> 00:46:37,000
Wealth and power.

579
00:46:37,000 --> 00:46:40,920
Those are tough because what is wealth like if like if is that like being a billionaire

580
00:46:40,920 --> 00:46:46,720
or just having like everything you like put them all the resources put them both to the

581
00:46:46,720 --> 00:46:50,520
extremes you're a billionaire or you're like the dictator of the U.S.

582
00:46:50,520 --> 00:46:53,120
Oh I don't want to be a billionaire.

583
00:46:53,120 --> 00:46:57,320
Like if I could buy any house I wanted that'd be nice.

584
00:46:57,320 --> 00:47:01,040
You don't need to be a billionaire to have like the nicest house in Broomfield.

585
00:47:01,040 --> 00:47:06,600
So if I could just have the nicest house the coolest house I wanted and that's not being

586
00:47:06,600 --> 00:47:09,080
wealthy then I'm cool with getting rid of wealth.

587
00:47:09,080 --> 00:47:10,080
And you'd be left with power.

588
00:47:10,080 --> 00:47:12,440
So that's the thing you care about the most.

589
00:47:12,440 --> 00:47:18,240
I mean I guess I've I don't want to be controlled and so it's the powerful people that can control

590
00:47:18,240 --> 00:47:19,240
us.

591
00:47:19,240 --> 00:47:23,760
I think we can like combat that by being just as powerful as them.

592
00:47:23,760 --> 00:47:24,760
That'd be cool.

593
00:47:24,760 --> 00:47:26,680
You'd have control over others right.

594
00:47:26,680 --> 00:47:28,760
Yeah but I who are like you who don't want to be controlled.

595
00:47:28,760 --> 00:47:30,680
Yeah so I hopefully would retain that.

596
00:47:30,680 --> 00:47:31,680
Yeah.

597
00:47:31,680 --> 00:47:35,680
So like if I was ever like a senator I don't want to be president but if I like was a senator

598
00:47:35,680 --> 00:47:43,000
hopefully I would retain that awareness that no people especially Americans want freedom.

599
00:47:43,000 --> 00:47:48,080
Like let's get rid of stupid taxes and let's people allow people to do what they want with

600
00:47:48,080 --> 00:47:55,520
their money and not require shit like you know mandatory taxes or whatever else the

601
00:47:55,520 --> 00:48:03,320
government thinks they you know need to control us with then sure.

602
00:48:03,320 --> 00:48:07,760
Although I'm I think I will contradict myself to some degree because I do think certain

603
00:48:07,760 --> 00:48:11,120
environmental things are are good.

604
00:48:11,120 --> 00:48:21,400
How do you think power plays into the struggles that you have in your life or a desire for

605
00:48:21,400 --> 00:48:26,400
it.

606
00:48:26,400 --> 00:48:30,880
I mean I don't have any major struggles but I could see myself especially when I have

607
00:48:30,880 --> 00:48:38,520
kids like wanting to yeah you're wanting to to educate them in the way that I think is

608
00:48:38,520 --> 00:48:46,160
best yeah things of that nature where I feel like the government is trying to control the

609
00:48:46,160 --> 00:48:50,080
way I raise my children.

610
00:48:50,080 --> 00:48:54,480
But yeah right now I have a fair amount of autonomy.

611
00:48:54,480 --> 00:48:59,280
I think taxes are ridiculous but I'm doing all right.

612
00:48:59,280 --> 00:49:04,560
Since that was the last one left you'd have more of a propensity to desire power in your

613
00:49:04,560 --> 00:49:06,760
regular life.

614
00:49:06,760 --> 00:49:14,160
I think so just to combat like people whom I think are overreaching more more readily

615
00:49:14,160 --> 00:49:19,640
because yeah I think even though I'm staunchly independent libertarian I do I'm still impacted

616
00:49:19,640 --> 00:49:28,160
by like when I see someone who seems to have power whether it's a celebrity or a politician

617
00:49:28,160 --> 00:49:35,480
say something you know I kind of want to like agree with them because I assume they which

618
00:49:35,480 --> 00:49:41,040
is a false it's illogical to assume they they know what they're talking about but there

619
00:49:41,040 --> 00:49:47,080
it still has influence on me and so I have to like you know really step back and think

620
00:49:47,080 --> 00:49:51,640
okay is what they said really something true and do I really want to agree with that.

621
00:49:51,640 --> 00:50:02,840
So I guess in influencing people to to think about higher things or better things or think

622
00:50:02,840 --> 00:50:09,360
I guess be better people be better better citizens be better friends better husbands

623
00:50:09,360 --> 00:50:23,840
wives so if I if I could use power to help be a force of good then yeah sign me up.

624
00:50:23,840 --> 00:50:29,160
Why do you become a teacher not something with more more influence more power?

625
00:50:29,160 --> 00:50:31,480
Why did I or why did you?

626
00:50:31,480 --> 00:50:33,000
I think that was probably it.

627
00:50:33,000 --> 00:50:40,880
Like I realized how much of an impact you can have and how much of an impact I had I

628
00:50:40,880 --> 00:50:42,440
received from my teachers.

629
00:50:42,440 --> 00:50:47,840
Yeah because if you read something some celebrity or politician says something you read it like

630
00:50:47,840 --> 00:50:53,560
okay or you read a nice quote in the newspaper it sticks with you for like you know a day

631
00:50:53,560 --> 00:50:59,000
at most but like a teacher if you think back to the people who influenced you the most

632
00:50:59,000 --> 00:51:02,680
is your parents and your teachers and your friends.

633
00:51:02,680 --> 00:51:13,080
So like if I if I could be that for some some people then I think my life was was worthwhile

634
00:51:13,080 --> 00:51:15,080
and hopefully I've done that.

635
00:51:15,080 --> 00:51:19,840
What was the impact you had on your students and that they had on you?

636
00:51:19,840 --> 00:51:21,960
I mean you'd have to ask them.

637
00:51:21,960 --> 00:51:23,640
Has nobody ever told you?

638
00:51:23,640 --> 00:51:28,920
I think they've told me I mean not all of them obviously but you know some some

639
00:51:28,920 --> 00:51:33,480
say you know gear I think about I think about your class like not every day but I think

640
00:51:33,480 --> 00:51:34,480
about a lot.

641
00:51:34,480 --> 00:51:42,280
It influences the way I go to work or why I'm still Catholic or yeah how I approach this

642
00:51:42,280 --> 00:51:47,840
this or that so that's that's flattering when I hear that and the fact that you know former

643
00:51:47,840 --> 00:51:54,680
students keep in touch with me like like they want to still be involved in my life and they

644
00:51:54,680 --> 00:51:56,440
want me to be involved in theirs.

645
00:51:56,440 --> 00:52:03,120
I've been to a number of weddings so it shows that they want me in their life.

646
00:52:03,120 --> 00:52:07,680
I think people don't want people in their life that they think are negative or bad influence.

647
00:52:07,680 --> 00:52:12,320
So what impact has teaching had on you?

648
00:52:12,320 --> 00:52:22,400
It definitely has given me perspective like you know no two humans are alike fully alike

649
00:52:22,400 --> 00:52:30,960
and you know I taught a diversity of students and it definitely refined my views probably

650
00:52:30,960 --> 00:52:43,520
made me less idealistic in the negative sense or ideological realizing that you know there

651
00:52:43,520 --> 00:52:50,440
are a lot of these movements in the world that that seem toxic but but there are people

652
00:52:50,440 --> 00:52:55,800
in them who mean well and probably are good-hearted.

653
00:52:55,800 --> 00:53:06,400
So it's it's it's given me less like I guess I'm less judgmental because they've shown

654
00:53:06,400 --> 00:53:13,160
me that yeah your perspective is that my perspective is limited.

655
00:53:13,160 --> 00:53:18,400
I still think that I have a lot to share and you know the Catholic Church has a lot to

656
00:53:18,400 --> 00:53:28,280
give but oftentimes the way the truth is presented is not done with love and not done with enough

657
00:53:28,280 --> 00:53:37,320
nuance and not done with enough awareness of the audience to whom they're speaking.

658
00:53:37,320 --> 00:53:40,720
So yeah definitely widened my perspective.

659
00:53:40,720 --> 00:53:47,840
And looking back on your life up till now you were a teacher real estate investor and

660
00:53:47,840 --> 00:53:51,240
you grinded for a long period of your life is there anything you would go back and tell

661
00:53:51,240 --> 00:53:58,800
your younger self to learn before that took you too long to learn?

662
00:53:58,800 --> 00:53:59,800
Mobility.

663
00:53:59,800 --> 00:54:02,080
What do you mean?

664
00:54:02,080 --> 00:54:03,080
Flexibility.

665
00:54:03,080 --> 00:54:09,080
I and yeah I probably work out too much but I did definitely didn't stretch enough in

666
00:54:09,080 --> 00:54:10,080
my teens and 20s.

667
00:54:10,080 --> 00:54:12,360
Flexibility as in like actual flexibilities?

668
00:54:12,360 --> 00:54:23,480
Like I do Pilates now multiple times a day to make up for many days of not stretching

669
00:54:23,480 --> 00:54:27,480
and just grinding and not paying attention to like the need for rest.

670
00:54:27,480 --> 00:54:35,080
So if I could have like started Pilates in my 20s I'd probably be even in better shape.

671
00:54:35,080 --> 00:54:36,080
True.

672
00:54:36,080 --> 00:54:40,720
And be able to move a lot better.

673
00:54:40,720 --> 00:54:42,200
Exactly.

674
00:54:42,200 --> 00:54:49,120
And while I said I didn't regret not dating as much I think practicing empathy is something

675
00:54:49,120 --> 00:54:56,680
I didn't do until probably like really practicing it probably like starting 10 years ago which

676
00:54:56,680 --> 00:54:59,440
is kind of sad that I waited that long.

677
00:54:59,440 --> 00:55:03,960
But it's certainly I hadn't really heard that word until my 30s.

678
00:55:03,960 --> 00:55:05,480
My early 30s.

679
00:55:05,480 --> 00:55:15,480
So yeah if I would have been told like hey it's great to be tough and it's great to

680
00:55:15,480 --> 00:55:22,000
keep grinding but also like you need to have an availability for the people who don't have

681
00:55:22,000 --> 00:55:30,160
that capacity or don't have that desire or discipline.

682
00:55:30,160 --> 00:55:33,040
So yeah and I think that's part of being humble too.

683
00:55:33,040 --> 00:55:40,880
Nobody wasn't really emphasized in wrestling or football.

684
00:55:40,880 --> 00:55:45,560
So somehow yeah hearing if I could have heard that from like the right people I'm sure someone

685
00:55:45,560 --> 00:55:47,040
told me at some point.

686
00:55:47,040 --> 00:55:49,320
And you came in one ear and went out the other.

687
00:55:49,320 --> 00:55:51,040
It probably wasn't told to me by someone I respect.

688
00:55:51,040 --> 00:55:52,040
You're like that's feminine.

689
00:55:52,040 --> 00:55:53,040
Yeah exactly.

690
00:55:53,040 --> 00:55:54,040
It's not tough.

691
00:55:54,040 --> 00:55:55,040
Yeah.

692
00:55:55,040 --> 00:56:00,360
So I wish my wrestling coach for example would have you know obviously you don't say that

693
00:56:00,360 --> 00:56:08,320
like in the middle of a match but like maybe that's during the off season or something

694
00:56:08,320 --> 00:56:09,320
or.

695
00:56:09,320 --> 00:56:10,440
How do you learn it?

696
00:56:10,440 --> 00:56:11,440
How do you learn humility?

697
00:56:11,440 --> 00:56:12,920
No how did you learn empathy?

698
00:56:12,920 --> 00:56:16,960
What turned you on to it?

699
00:56:16,960 --> 00:56:19,640
Like going 30 years without it seems pretty brutal.

700
00:56:19,640 --> 00:56:22,200
I know.

701
00:56:22,200 --> 00:56:28,800
Probably meeting probably two people specifically is Joe Domko and Matt Mondragon.

702
00:56:28,800 --> 00:56:31,920
Very respectable men.

703
00:56:31,920 --> 00:56:32,920
Very different.

704
00:56:32,920 --> 00:56:43,320
And yeah became close friends and just seeing how much more they saw in life that I was

705
00:56:43,320 --> 00:56:50,200
missing out on I guess was my the reason I started to really like oh my gosh this is

706
00:56:50,200 --> 00:56:53,800
something I have to take seriously and work on.

707
00:56:53,800 --> 00:57:00,480
And of course teaching theology like you read about it but it's like I just glossed over

708
00:57:00,480 --> 00:57:01,480
it usually.

709
00:57:01,480 --> 00:57:02,480
Like what's this word?

710
00:57:02,480 --> 00:57:03,480
Empathy?

711
00:57:03,480 --> 00:57:06,480
I don't think that's in the dictionary.

712
00:57:06,480 --> 00:57:09,480
Not the gear dictionary.

713
00:57:09,480 --> 00:57:12,360
I mean empathy is not often talked about in Catholic circles.

714
00:57:12,360 --> 00:57:15,520
It's humility is and it should be.

715
00:57:15,520 --> 00:57:19,080
Empathy should be discussed more.

716
00:57:19,080 --> 00:57:21,440
Did you guys you were younger than I you went to Catholic school.

717
00:57:21,440 --> 00:57:23,480
Did you hear that word in grade school?

718
00:57:23,480 --> 00:57:24,480
Really?

719
00:57:24,480 --> 00:57:25,480
Yeah.

720
00:57:25,480 --> 00:57:26,480
No.

721
00:57:26,480 --> 00:57:27,480
No.

722
00:57:27,480 --> 00:57:28,480
Okay.

723
00:57:28,480 --> 00:57:29,480
Did you hear it in high school?

724
00:57:29,480 --> 00:57:30,480
I think I heard it in high school.

725
00:57:30,480 --> 00:57:31,480
Okay.

726
00:57:31,480 --> 00:57:32,480
Not for my teachers probably.

727
00:57:32,480 --> 00:57:33,480
No.

728
00:57:33,480 --> 00:57:34,480
So there you go.

729
00:57:34,480 --> 00:57:41,440
So I can't necessarily blame myself because I probably wasn't talked about.

730
00:57:41,440 --> 00:57:48,680
What do you think is kind of your biggest sticking point in life now?

731
00:57:48,680 --> 00:58:00,120
I mean my hip in some ways but I think it's good.

732
00:58:00,120 --> 00:58:07,360
I think it's on its way to being healed but I think I'm still pretty idealistic.

733
00:58:07,360 --> 00:58:14,180
So I was just like reflecting last night on how like I'm really trying to like find the

734
00:58:14,180 --> 00:58:18,000
perfect diet which probably is impossible.

735
00:58:18,000 --> 00:58:21,360
Like that's why I want to like have land and grow my own food.

736
00:58:21,360 --> 00:58:28,160
So I was thinking about I was just kind of burdened for a moment like this is going to

737
00:58:28,160 --> 00:58:39,120
take so much time and it was almost crushing like not to traumatize it but it's like just

738
00:58:39,120 --> 00:58:44,240
for a moment I was like because I don't like to give up on things so I'm just like thinking

739
00:58:44,240 --> 00:58:48,960
I'm because I know I'm going to do this so like am I going to spend 90% of my day like

740
00:58:48,960 --> 00:58:55,440
worried about like you know my crops and my animals and like then like obviously you have

741
00:58:55,440 --> 00:59:00,200
to harvest them and like prepare them like that's a lot of work.

742
00:59:00,200 --> 00:59:01,200
Starting a farm.

743
00:59:01,200 --> 00:59:02,200
Yeah.

744
00:59:02,200 --> 00:59:03,200
It's a whole job.

745
00:59:03,200 --> 00:59:04,200
Exactly.

746
00:59:04,200 --> 00:59:10,760
So I think just being maintaining like reasonable expectations for that.

747
00:59:10,760 --> 00:59:16,080
Obviously there are people who farm and there are people who even as like a recreational

748
00:59:16,080 --> 00:59:22,280
farm and they hopefully still have some semblance of a life but it's after doing it for so long

749
00:59:22,280 --> 00:59:26,240
things get you know streamlined and you get good at things.

750
00:59:26,240 --> 00:59:34,480
So just being I guess being patient with myself and not and realizing that okay maybe at a

751
00:59:34,480 --> 00:59:38,560
certain point I'm going to realize that raising cows is not going to happen and it shouldn't

752
00:59:38,560 --> 00:59:39,560
happen.

753
00:59:39,560 --> 00:59:44,800
I've fed beef at Whole Foods and sprouts and just settle for that or buy it become friends

754
00:59:44,800 --> 00:59:49,600
with a farmer and buy one of his cows like so I'm marrying a girl who has a cow.

755
00:59:49,600 --> 00:59:50,600
There you go.

756
00:59:50,600 --> 00:59:51,600
Comes in the dowry.

757
00:59:51,600 --> 00:59:52,600
Yeah exactly.

758
00:59:52,600 --> 00:59:58,000
So like I guess just being being patient pursuing the ideal.

759
00:59:58,000 --> 01:00:01,320
Our podcast is all about kind of living more bravely.

760
01:00:01,320 --> 01:00:02,320
Yeah.

761
01:00:02,320 --> 01:00:07,960
Bragously and so we always ask the guest at the end of the podcast to make themselves

762
01:00:07,960 --> 01:00:15,960
a carrot which is a two week challenge to live more bravely in whatever way that that

763
01:00:15,960 --> 01:00:20,800
manifests in your own life because some people might be braver around things that seem scary

764
01:00:20,800 --> 01:00:26,560
and some people might unexpectedly have fears around things you wouldn't expect them to.

765
01:00:26,560 --> 01:00:31,160
So what would be your carrot?

766
01:00:31,160 --> 01:00:35,760
I mean do you sense somewhere an area just knowing me do you sense an area because I

767
01:00:35,760 --> 01:00:39,160
could just make something up and it might not be actually that challenging for myself

768
01:00:39,160 --> 01:00:42,480
but do you see an area in my life that I might need some courage?

769
01:00:42,480 --> 01:00:46,400
I don't know I don't have the lived experience of your life.

770
01:00:46,400 --> 01:00:47,680
It's true.

771
01:00:47,680 --> 01:00:51,840
I'm sure you feel fear sometimes around things.

772
01:00:51,840 --> 01:00:58,840
I'm just afraid of marrying the wrong person or healing my hip so pretty superficial things.

773
01:00:58,840 --> 01:01:02,440
Marrying the wrong person isn't superficial but it's probably not going to happen so I

774
01:01:02,440 --> 01:01:06,840
don't know if you guys have challenged me before to do things that I didn't realize

775
01:01:06,840 --> 01:01:08,240
I was afraid of so.

776
01:01:08,240 --> 01:01:13,520
What do you think is behind the fear of marrying the wrong person?

777
01:01:13,520 --> 01:01:24,920
Having a life that's chaotic or being with someone who really fucks up my life.

778
01:01:24,920 --> 01:01:26,840
And I don't want to get divorced.

779
01:01:26,840 --> 01:01:33,480
I grew up in a divorced family and I in a way I'm better for it.

780
01:01:33,480 --> 01:01:40,680
I think I'm a strong person because of it but I also see that I have major wounds because

781
01:01:40,680 --> 01:01:43,700
of it and I'm still recovering from it.

782
01:01:43,700 --> 01:01:46,980
So I guess I don't want to pass it on to the next generation.

783
01:01:46,980 --> 01:01:51,400
So I have that fear of divorce but then I have simultaneous fear like I don't want to

784
01:01:51,400 --> 01:01:55,920
be stuck with the wrong person because I'll be afraid of leaving her.

785
01:01:55,920 --> 01:01:58,760
So I want to make sure I get it right.

786
01:01:58,760 --> 01:02:03,160
What's fearful about chaos and divorce behind that?

787
01:02:03,160 --> 01:02:09,080
Seems like there's some fear around getting things right, around making mistakes.

788
01:02:09,080 --> 01:02:15,280
Well yeah because again I don't want to fuck up my kids.

789
01:02:15,280 --> 01:02:16,520
But let's say you never have kids.

790
01:02:16,520 --> 01:02:19,600
If I never have kids?

791
01:02:19,600 --> 01:02:22,840
What's still scary about making that mistake?

792
01:02:22,840 --> 01:02:28,000
I guess still dealing with the chaos is scary.

793
01:02:28,000 --> 01:02:30,800
And maybe this is my desire for control.

794
01:02:30,800 --> 01:02:33,480
I want to have my life with my lifestyle.

795
01:02:33,480 --> 01:02:41,080
I want to be able to work out and sleep and eat healthy food and go see beautiful things,

796
01:02:41,080 --> 01:02:42,080
go travel.

797
01:02:42,080 --> 01:02:51,160
But if I'm constantly worried about is this relationship going to fall apart at any minute

798
01:02:51,160 --> 01:02:57,280
that seems like I wouldn't be able to live that kind of lifestyle.

799
01:02:57,280 --> 01:03:04,840
Yeah and it sounds like you're very hard on yourself when you don't do all these things.

800
01:03:04,840 --> 01:03:07,360
And what's behind those things?

801
01:03:07,360 --> 01:03:09,360
Why do those make you you?

802
01:03:09,360 --> 01:03:13,320
And then if they go away why are you now anxious and a mess?

803
01:03:13,320 --> 01:03:15,720
Because again you need sleep and food.

804
01:03:15,720 --> 01:03:17,920
Well not even that but it has to be perfect right?

805
01:03:17,920 --> 01:03:22,120
You have to get your workout in, you have to get your pilates in, you have to get your

806
01:03:22,120 --> 01:03:23,120
healthy food.

807
01:03:23,120 --> 01:03:27,160
Sure you can do it to a minimum you still feel anxious.

808
01:03:27,160 --> 01:03:28,160
Yeah maybe.

809
01:03:28,160 --> 01:03:29,160
Yeah I'm probably control free.

810
01:03:29,160 --> 01:03:32,840
Like you're trying to live up to these ideals and all of a sudden you feel horrible when

811
01:03:32,840 --> 01:03:34,060
you don't.

812
01:03:34,060 --> 01:03:45,320
Not horrible just like not like I'm living my best life.

813
01:03:45,320 --> 01:03:49,960
So what behind all of these things that what's left?

814
01:03:49,960 --> 01:03:51,600
You mean if all those things somehow went away.

815
01:03:51,600 --> 01:03:58,320
Well ultimately I'm loved by God so that's where you know life ultimately gets its worth

816
01:03:58,320 --> 01:04:02,160
is that you're a child of God but yeah it's easy to forget.

817
01:04:02,160 --> 01:04:08,080
Do you fully believe it because it seems like these things have a lot of weight right?

818
01:04:08,080 --> 01:04:10,400
They do.

819
01:04:10,400 --> 01:04:13,080
I think he has to remind me a lot.

820
01:04:13,080 --> 01:04:17,400
So yeah I have days when I'm more aware of it than others.

821
01:04:17,400 --> 01:04:23,000
My theory would be you're afraid of losing the identity of yourself you created.

822
01:04:23,000 --> 01:04:25,360
I think you're probably right.

823
01:04:25,360 --> 01:04:26,800
So are you going to challenge me to?

824
01:04:26,800 --> 01:04:27,800
You've attached to it.

825
01:04:27,800 --> 01:04:28,800
Like this is.

826
01:04:28,800 --> 01:04:31,000
Not do the things I like to do for two weeks.

827
01:04:31,000 --> 01:04:32,760
Well the carrot is up to you.

828
01:04:32,760 --> 01:04:38,880
I don't know if that would be it would be productive for you to do that.

829
01:04:38,880 --> 01:04:41,160
It probably wouldn't.

830
01:04:41,160 --> 01:04:44,680
I mean we could we could say I could do things.

831
01:04:44,680 --> 01:04:50,000
Well I mean I'm going to be in three weeks from now I'm going to be walking in Spain

832
01:04:50,000 --> 01:05:00,040
12 to 15 miles a day with my brother and his six children and his wife and there and my

833
01:05:00,040 --> 01:05:03,960
brother's wife's brother who's his brother-in-law who is a priest.

834
01:05:03,960 --> 01:05:05,660
So we'll have our own priest.

835
01:05:05,660 --> 01:05:08,240
So I won't have any access to Pilates.

836
01:05:08,240 --> 01:05:10,200
I won't have access to really healthy food.

837
01:05:10,200 --> 01:05:14,440
I mean I'm sure I'll have food but I have no control over what food it is and I'll be

838
01:05:14,440 --> 01:05:15,740
sleeping in hostels.

839
01:05:15,740 --> 01:05:17,240
So I might get bad sleep.

840
01:05:17,240 --> 01:05:25,840
So I might have a self-imposed sabbatical from the things that are that I like to do.

841
01:05:25,840 --> 01:05:28,220
But I've already made that commitment.

842
01:05:28,220 --> 01:05:36,640
So maybe for you you just need to even just explore inside of yourself.

843
01:05:36,640 --> 01:05:40,360
But what's going on in there?

844
01:05:40,360 --> 01:05:41,360
Absolutely.

845
01:05:41,360 --> 01:05:42,360
You're off.

846
01:05:42,360 --> 01:05:43,360
You're always moving right?

847
01:05:43,360 --> 01:05:44,360
I'm always moving.

848
01:05:44,360 --> 01:05:49,680
Like how often do you go in and contemplate the stories about yourself that you think

849
01:05:49,680 --> 01:05:52,680
are true that you've never questioned?

850
01:05:52,680 --> 01:05:53,680
Yes not that often.

851
01:05:53,680 --> 01:05:59,080
I mean I have done some therapy and I've actually started meeting with a new guy.

852
01:05:59,080 --> 01:06:04,920
He has many methodologies but internal family systems is his is the thing I'm seeking and

853
01:06:04,920 --> 01:06:08,000
it I'll give a quick explanation.

854
01:06:08,000 --> 01:06:13,640
You basically have because I'm very excited by this.

855
01:06:13,640 --> 01:06:20,080
It basically is a therapeutic approach that maintains that we have parts of ourselves

856
01:06:20,080 --> 01:06:28,480
that are kind of frozen in time that essentially explain our emotional outbursts or behaviors

857
01:06:28,480 --> 01:06:31,500
that are not typical of us.

858
01:06:31,500 --> 01:06:39,480
And these parts are they represent trauma in our past that made that part of us kind

859
01:06:39,480 --> 01:06:40,760
of be stuck.

860
01:06:40,760 --> 01:06:47,480
So and you have essentially two parts the exiles and the managers.

861
01:06:47,480 --> 01:06:49,960
So the exiles are the parts of you that you've kind of suppressed.

862
01:06:49,960 --> 01:06:56,080
You don't let come up and those managers kind of protect them.

863
01:06:56,080 --> 01:07:07,520
And so when we get in situations where the manager one of them is a firefighter and a

864
01:07:07,520 --> 01:07:12,920
firefighter it's a great image because firefighters when they see a problem what do they do?

865
01:07:12,920 --> 01:07:18,000
Are they like worried about the blinds or like a vase in your house when there's a

866
01:07:18,000 --> 01:07:21,120
like they're rescuing like a child or a cat?

867
01:07:21,120 --> 01:07:27,120
You know they're like smashing windows fucking kicking in doors like they don't give a shit

868
01:07:27,120 --> 01:07:28,120
about your house.

869
01:07:28,120 --> 01:07:34,060
They're going to rescue that cat or that baby and that's what our firefighters do.

870
01:07:34,060 --> 01:07:39,080
I need something and I'm going to kick down doors and do whatever the fuck needs to happen

871
01:07:39,080 --> 01:07:40,880
to get what I need.

872
01:07:40,880 --> 01:07:46,680
And so we can actually we there's a lot of insight into our erratic behavior from this

873
01:07:46,680 --> 01:07:52,400
this theory so I'm doing this internal family systems with this guy to really explore especially

874
01:07:52,400 --> 01:07:58,800
my exiles because I think there's exiles in me that have not been allowed to speak for

875
01:07:58,800 --> 01:08:02,240
many years like I think fear is one of them.

876
01:08:02,240 --> 01:08:04,640
You're not allowed to feel it as a masculine guy.

877
01:08:04,640 --> 01:08:05,640
Exactly.

878
01:08:05,640 --> 01:08:11,100
Yeah fear and sadness are probably the two exiles that I really need to explore.

879
01:08:11,100 --> 01:08:17,360
So yeah I'm going to really explore and dig into that.

880
01:08:17,360 --> 01:08:21,560
What would that look like in the next two weeks?

881
01:08:21,560 --> 01:08:22,560
I mean I'm going to meet with him.

882
01:08:22,560 --> 01:08:26,360
I met with him two days ago and I'm going to meet with him again in two weeks from two

883
01:08:26,360 --> 01:08:27,360
days ago.

884
01:08:27,360 --> 01:08:31,800
So in the meantime he's giving me some homework on yeah just really exploring.

885
01:08:31,800 --> 01:08:36,040
He had me take a number of psychological exams.

886
01:08:36,040 --> 01:08:41,440
I mean they're not like crazy just like some yes and no and like scales.

887
01:08:41,440 --> 01:08:50,200
And so it kind of points out like what kind of your excesses are and one of them is like

888
01:08:50,200 --> 01:08:56,000
attacking bullying which I was kind of surprised at that I and kind of not like I'm a fighter

889
01:08:56,000 --> 01:08:59,520
but he's like he was asking me questions like do you have you ever been like violent with

890
01:08:59,520 --> 01:09:05,120
a woman or and I'm like no I'm not I don't I don't believe in hitting women.

891
01:09:05,120 --> 01:09:09,920
And so he was actually like making me concerned about myself and concerned that he thinks

892
01:09:09,920 --> 01:09:14,880
I'm like some crazy bull and he's like he brought up he's like I imagine Mike Tyson's

893
01:09:14,880 --> 01:09:20,440
wife probably feels like very much attacked or like because he's like crazy like obviously

894
01:09:20,440 --> 01:09:23,840
he's a very aggressive guy and I think he's had some domestic abuse stuff.

895
01:09:23,840 --> 01:09:25,680
I don't know if he still is like that.

896
01:09:25,680 --> 01:09:28,200
No offense Mike Tyson I'm cool with you.

897
01:09:28,200 --> 01:09:29,960
We don't need to fight.

898
01:09:29,960 --> 01:09:36,240
Anyway that I'm supposed to explore that like the aggressive part of me and he's given me

899
01:09:36,240 --> 01:09:42,440
a number of talks that I'm supposed to listen to to really explore that myself.

900
01:09:42,440 --> 01:09:44,960
Sounds like a great thing to explore.

901
01:09:44,960 --> 01:09:45,960
Yeah.

902
01:09:45,960 --> 01:09:51,560
Usually there's a stick attached to the to the challenge to the carrot.

903
01:09:51,560 --> 01:09:52,560
Yeah.

904
01:09:52,560 --> 01:09:55,920
But if you don't feel it's necessary and skip that part.

905
01:09:55,920 --> 01:09:57,880
So the carrot is to do to do my homework.

906
01:09:57,880 --> 01:09:58,880
Is that what you're saying?

907
01:09:58,880 --> 01:09:59,880
Yeah.

908
01:09:59,880 --> 01:10:00,880
I mean I would probably do it in the stick.

909
01:10:00,880 --> 01:10:05,080
I mean I probably would.

910
01:10:05,080 --> 01:10:09,360
But you want to think of something that I wouldn't normally do.

911
01:10:09,360 --> 01:10:13,240
Just something you wouldn't want to do if you don't do your homework.

912
01:10:13,240 --> 01:10:14,240
Oh.

913
01:10:14,240 --> 01:10:15,240
Exploring that.

914
01:10:15,240 --> 01:10:16,240
Okay.

915
01:10:16,240 --> 01:10:17,240
So if I.

916
01:10:17,240 --> 01:10:18,240
Yeah.

917
01:10:18,240 --> 01:10:23,360
I would say if I don't do my homework then I should probably take away something I really

918
01:10:23,360 --> 01:10:24,360
like.

919
01:10:24,360 --> 01:10:28,360
Which I guess is like Pilates.

920
01:10:28,360 --> 01:10:32,520
Or stretching.

921
01:10:32,520 --> 01:10:36,040
Which wasn't the case two years ago.

922
01:10:36,040 --> 01:10:40,160
So I'm supposed to watch I think five episodes you could say if I don't listen to all five

923
01:10:40,160 --> 01:10:43,320
or if I don't listen to three I have to go to Pilates three times less.

924
01:10:43,320 --> 01:10:45,200
Can't go to Pilates for two weeks.

925
01:10:45,200 --> 01:10:46,200
Okay.

926
01:10:46,200 --> 01:10:49,320
And that doesn't count the Camino trip that's outside of the Camino.

927
01:10:49,320 --> 01:10:50,320
Yeah.

928
01:10:50,320 --> 01:10:51,320
Yeah it doesn't count.

929
01:10:51,320 --> 01:10:52,320
Okay.

930
01:10:52,320 --> 01:10:53,320
All right.

931
01:10:53,320 --> 01:10:54,320
Cool.

932
01:10:54,320 --> 01:10:55,320
Cool.

933
01:10:55,320 --> 01:10:56,320
Thanks for coming on.

934
01:10:56,320 --> 01:10:57,320
David this is great.

935
01:10:57,320 --> 01:10:58,320
Where can people find you?

936
01:10:58,320 --> 01:10:59,320
In Broomfield.

937
01:10:59,320 --> 01:11:04,400
Do you have any social media or anything you'd want them to find you?

938
01:11:04,400 --> 01:11:07,600
I think I'm Gear Fit 303 but I don't have that many followers.

939
01:11:07,600 --> 01:11:12,200
Like maybe 500 so this might boost me up I don't know.

940
01:11:12,200 --> 01:11:13,200
Cool.

941
01:11:13,200 --> 01:11:14,200
All right.

942
01:11:14,200 --> 01:11:15,200
Yeah.

943
01:11:15,200 --> 01:11:16,200
Good having you man.

944
01:11:16,200 --> 01:11:17,200
Yeah.

945
01:11:17,200 --> 01:11:32,200
Thanks for having me.