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Hey, welcome back everyone.

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Our guest today is Charles Umsalanga.

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He is a motivational speaker, an author,

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and an entrepreneur.

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Charles has coached, mentored, and influenced

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thousands of young people throughout his career.

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What are people missing when it comes to living

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the life of their dreams?

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Today, we will discuss how Charles became

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a motivational speaker, how lack of mentorship

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is affecting the youth's mental health,

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why direction in life is more important than speed,

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how to not get lost in a culture of achievement,

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the challenges Charles is facing to become

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the best motivational speaker in the world,

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the importance of choosing the right partner,

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and much more.

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Thank you all for the support on the last few episodes.

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And if you've enjoyed it, then there's one large favor

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that you could do for me, which is to hit

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the subscribe button on YouTube or Spotify.

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Thank you all for the support.

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Thanks for listening.

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["The Voice of the World"]

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Thanks for coming, Charles.

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It's great to see you.

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Thanks for having me.

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For anyone who's in the audience who's listening,

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can you tell us a little bit about your background,

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how you came to the US, what you do?

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Yeah, man, Charles Msilanga is the name.

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I came to the US through school, through,

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that's how we met, University of Colorado in Boulder.

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I came for my master's program.

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And I realized that for me to do best at what I do,

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location matters.

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And I believe I was called to influence and change this world.

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And that's why I chose the US, because if you make it here,

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you make it anywhere in the world.

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Literally.

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And what I do basically, I am in the business

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of developing people.

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And what that looks like is I am a coach, an author, a speaker.

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And I'm just a human being who believes,

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was called by God to help people increase what I call an I3.

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And that is influence, impact, and income.

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And I got that from one of our great mentor and speaker

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who I follow called Dr. Darius Daniels.

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And so what was that like when you first

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came to the US, that transition period?

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Because you come from Kenya, which is quite different

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than the US is.

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And you were also quite old at that point.

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So you were pretty used to having grown up there,

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the culture.

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What was that transition period like for you?

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Man, the transition was what I can say, a paradigm shift

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for me, coming to a place where culture is automatic,

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to a place where culture is intentional.

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And having that perspective that I

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will be in a place or an environment

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where I will have a culture in an automatic way

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the same way I was when I was back in Kenya,

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that was a big shift.

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And I learned that everything here is about intentionality.

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Some of the things don't just happen automatically.

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And that shift to me initially was a challenge,

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because number one, the speed of how things work here

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is very fast compared to back home,

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and how basically things operate, the culture,

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the system, and everything related to how lifestyle

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is all about.

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So some of those things to me was a big, big hurdle

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to some point.

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But on the flip side, or on the positive side,

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is I had a realization that there was a part of me

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that I never knew existed in me, and that is the ability

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to be flexible and the ability to fit in cultures

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and environments which are not familiar to the ones

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that I'm used to.

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So I think it came with a blessing for me

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to be able to have the awareness or the ability

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to be in a position where you can transform that location

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to be home, far away from home.

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What are some concrete examples of things

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that were different that you had to change your mindset

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around, where, like you said, things used to be more

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automatic and you had to be intentional?

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What are some things where you had to change

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your paradigm around that?

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Yeah, community, man, community.

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Not, you have to be intentional about being in a community

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where you have the right mindsets, you have the right vision,

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you have the right ambition, and even you have the right

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drive to achieve a certain success that you probably

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wanna achieve or you wanna get to.

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And that to me was something that wasn't automatic

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as far as the content or the perspective that I thought

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I was gonna get and being coming from a place

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where I had created that, or I found myself automatically

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to be in a place where we were dreamers.

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I come from a very humble background and all we knew

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is that this is not the life that I want to be living,

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or this is a life where I was born, but this is not

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a life where I will stay.

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You know what I'm saying?

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And we always had this, we always back home with my friends

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who we were dreaming big and all that.

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We used to say that yes, we might be born from a poor family,

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but a poor family will not come out of us.

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So that was the notion that I was having coming to the US.

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I was realizing and thinking, the American dream,

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this is something that I can get in there

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and this environment that I had created at home

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will happen automatically, but I realized that no,

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it's not the same, that you have to be intentional

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for you to be exceptional.

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And I always wanted to be exceptional.

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So that's the difference as far as my experience

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is concerned.

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And why do you think it was so easy to find dreamers

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in your hometown versus finding those people in the US?

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First of all, I think those people are there

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in the US a lot.

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The reason as to why, and also there are people

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who don't dream in my home country,

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and who are comfortable with where they are

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and what they have.

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The difference is, in my click back home,

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I think it's because when you're born in a place

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where the only vessel or the only weapon you have

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to succeed is a dream, you have to dream very big.

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And that I happen to have a community of people

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who that's the only vessel we had.

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And that dream was the thing that drove us,

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that dream was the thing that was an engine to us,

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that propelled us to do what we had to do

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so that we can be able to be at a place

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where that dream is no longer a dream but a reality.

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What's your dream?

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Oh man, I have big dreams, David.

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But my biggest dream is to be the best motivational speaker

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in the world.

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That's the thing that I wanna be at.

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The place where the world will look for me,

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and a place where I will be in demand

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because of what I produce and because of what is in me

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in terms of speaking, authoring, and coaching.

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And I always say, man, I refuse to die

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until history records my greatness.

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That's awesome.

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How did you find out that was what you were called to do

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was motivating people to live better lives?

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Yeah, man, let me give you this story how I got there.

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So there was this kid in high school, and that is me.

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I was in high school, I think the third year of high school.

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And in high school, man, I knew nothing about life.

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All I knew is just go to school,

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and what I had was all that the world could offer,

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and that was it.

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But one day, one speaker came to our school

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and did one motivational session

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that I can say changed my life.

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And that guy, man, God bless him, wherever he is,

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he came and he said, you know what?

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And he used this saying,

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and that's where I got the interest about America.

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He said, America did not make Americans,

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Americans made America.

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And he said that all of us are like diamonds.

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The difference between the diamond that we are

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and the diamond that is on the shelf that is expensive,

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it's attractive, and it's shining,

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is because there is a process that that diamond went through

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that all of you need to go through

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so that you can get there.

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Fortunately or unfortunately,

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some of you do not have the ability

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to go through that process

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so that you can realize that progress.

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And I'm here to tell you that if you go through that process

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which requires a diamond has to go through refinement,

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it has to go through pressure, it has to go through fire.

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And that's the process where he told us

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that that is challenges in life,

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that if you have to go through them,

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then you will be that diamond that is shining,

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that is in demand, and that is expensive.

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And that changed my life, David.

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And that guy, as he finished his speech,

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I went to him and I told him,

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hey, you literally changed my mind.

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I never saw life in that perspective

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and what you just said changed my life.

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And he gave me a book called The Greatness Syndrome.

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It's written by a gentleman by the name Pepe Minambo.

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And that book became like my Bible.

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I looked in that book and there were quotes that says

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that the difference between ordinary and extraordinary

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is the little extra.

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It had quotes that says that excuses are the nails

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used to build a house called failure.

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And each time I read that book, it changed my life.

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And even today, I still read that book

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because every time when I'm down, I am low,

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I have to go to that book and it usually changed

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my perspective and gives me my fuel and drive.

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In that moment or that season of my high school moment,

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before that guy came, I used to be a poor student, man.

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I never used to perform.

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I had the potential but I never knew I had the potential

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in me and that guy asked me, what do you wanna become?

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What do you wanna become in life?

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Or what career do you wanna do in college?

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And I told him, I wanna be an economist.

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And he wrote to me to economist Charles

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and he gave me that book.

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Trust me, flash forward, David, I found myself

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first day in college, enrolled in a university

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to do economics and finance.

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And I was so uncomfortable and I was like,

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what am I doing to the people who that guy cannot reach to?

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What am I doing to the people who God will give me

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an ability to access that that guy cannot have?

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And that's when I decided to do and to follow this mission.

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And all my life, I've been in the business

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of developing people and I've been able to transform

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that passion into a profit.

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And that's how I got into that space, man.

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That's a great story, dude.

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Thanks, man.

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I love that.

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Thank you.

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So you've been doing it for a bit now, right?

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Motivational speaking.

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Yeah, on November 9th, it will be my 10th year.

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10th year.

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Yeah, and that's since my first day in college.

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That was when you started.

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Yeah.

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What are some of the things you've seen impacting people

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from your work?

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What is that like?

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And do you have any specific examples of people

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that have changed what they're doing

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because of what you told them?

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Oh, man, 100%, David, 100%.

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I've seen people, I've seen young people specifically

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being able to be like me,

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where they were not performing well in school

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to a point where I came into contact with them,

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inspired them to a point where they,

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some of them are in college,

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some of them are in good workplaces.

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I've also seen people who are into positions

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and starting life of almost giving up.

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And when they encountered me,

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they had a chance to change their perspective

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and had a move.

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But the biggest thing that I get is the everyday

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on my inbox, either Facebook, Instagram, or WhatsApp.

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Some people have my phone number,

263
00:12:38,160 --> 00:12:41,360
which they get it through my social media handles.

264
00:12:41,360 --> 00:12:44,600
Trust me, I get messages of people telling me,

265
00:12:44,600 --> 00:12:46,480
hey man, this message encouraged me.

266
00:12:46,480 --> 00:12:48,760
Hey man, this thing transformed my life.

267
00:12:48,760 --> 00:12:51,560
And that really, really, really moves me.

268
00:12:51,560 --> 00:12:55,160
And one of the biggest stories I have was,

269
00:12:55,160 --> 00:12:56,840
when I was in college,

270
00:12:56,840 --> 00:12:58,760
I also happened to get into leadership

271
00:12:58,760 --> 00:13:02,280
and had a position of the student president

272
00:13:02,280 --> 00:13:03,600
at my university.

273
00:13:03,600 --> 00:13:07,600
And one thing that I can say is,

274
00:13:07,600 --> 00:13:11,600
when I graduated, I had a young man who I was mentoring.

275
00:13:11,600 --> 00:13:14,080
And this young man had no idea

276
00:13:14,080 --> 00:13:17,320
as far as what they wanna be or they wanna do in life.

277
00:13:17,320 --> 00:13:20,560
And so we walked with him and flash forward,

278
00:13:20,560 --> 00:13:23,120
that young man got an opportunity,

279
00:13:23,120 --> 00:13:26,240
not only to be in the same college that I was,

280
00:13:26,240 --> 00:13:30,560
but also to be a president or the position that I was.

281
00:13:30,560 --> 00:13:34,760
And I realized that he told me that success leaves clues,

282
00:13:34,760 --> 00:13:36,120
that if you wanna be successful,

283
00:13:36,120 --> 00:13:39,320
look for someone who has been where you want to be

284
00:13:39,320 --> 00:13:40,760
and do what he did.

285
00:13:40,760 --> 00:13:42,720
And so that's what I can say.

286
00:13:42,720 --> 00:13:44,760
Oh, success does leave clues too.

287
00:13:44,760 --> 00:13:49,200
That's how I try to model my career in my life,

288
00:13:49,200 --> 00:13:51,520
is most of the friends that I have,

289
00:13:51,520 --> 00:13:53,480
I've seen something inside of them

290
00:13:53,480 --> 00:13:55,240
that I would like to be more like.

291
00:13:55,240 --> 00:13:58,080
And so like, oh, that person's really generous

292
00:13:58,080 --> 00:14:01,560
or that person's really kind, that person's really open.

293
00:14:01,560 --> 00:14:04,440
And I see that and I'm like, oh, I wanna be around them.

294
00:14:04,440 --> 00:14:06,600
That way I can get it by diffusion.

295
00:14:06,600 --> 00:14:08,960
A hundred percent, a hundred percent.

296
00:14:12,080 --> 00:14:14,320
You don't grow as far as your dream.

297
00:14:14,320 --> 00:14:15,800
You go as far as your team.

298
00:14:15,800 --> 00:14:19,920
So that's a hundred percent right, yep.

299
00:14:19,920 --> 00:14:22,520
So you work with young people a lot.

300
00:14:22,520 --> 00:14:27,160
And at least in the US, in more modern times,

301
00:14:27,160 --> 00:14:30,320
since like 2000s, young people have been doing worse

302
00:14:30,320 --> 00:14:32,720
in a lot of different metrics and mental health

303
00:14:32,720 --> 00:14:34,480
and their careers and their connectedness

304
00:14:34,480 --> 00:14:36,000
and their communities.

305
00:14:36,000 --> 00:14:38,160
Why do you think young people are struggling so much?

306
00:14:38,160 --> 00:14:41,640
And how can we help them?

307
00:14:41,640 --> 00:14:42,880
Because it seems to be larger

308
00:14:42,880 --> 00:14:45,080
than just they don't have motivation, right?

309
00:14:45,960 --> 00:14:47,960
Well, there are many factors, David.

310
00:14:47,960 --> 00:14:48,800
There are many factors,

311
00:14:48,800 --> 00:14:52,320
but the main factor I think is there is a gap

312
00:14:52,320 --> 00:14:54,320
as far as mentorship is concerned

313
00:14:54,320 --> 00:14:57,480
between the young people and the generation that is ahead.

314
00:14:57,480 --> 00:15:01,680
And that if you're in a jungle without a map,

315
00:15:02,640 --> 00:15:05,960
any route will be a route that you will walk

316
00:15:05,960 --> 00:15:08,840
with the hope that it will get you out of a jungle.

317
00:15:08,840 --> 00:15:11,000
And the reason as to why I'm saying that

318
00:15:11,000 --> 00:15:14,240
is because direction is more important than speed.

319
00:15:14,240 --> 00:15:17,000
And some of the things we go through

320
00:15:17,000 --> 00:15:20,520
as far as young people having mental health and all that,

321
00:15:20,520 --> 00:15:24,600
I can say it's because there is a group of people

322
00:15:24,600 --> 00:15:25,880
that is supposed to take charge

323
00:15:25,880 --> 00:15:27,640
as far as mentoring these young people

324
00:15:27,640 --> 00:15:31,000
and helping them be able to be the people

325
00:15:31,000 --> 00:15:32,120
that they are meant to become,

326
00:15:32,120 --> 00:15:36,120
or help them to be able to transform their mind

327
00:15:36,120 --> 00:15:40,360
so that they can be able to overcome some of the battles

328
00:15:40,360 --> 00:15:42,760
or challenges or even dream

329
00:15:42,760 --> 00:15:45,000
as far as what they want to become in life.

330
00:15:45,000 --> 00:15:46,560
There's a gap of people,

331
00:15:46,560 --> 00:15:50,000
and that is including you and I,

332
00:15:50,000 --> 00:15:53,640
that have not been able to be in the forefront

333
00:15:53,640 --> 00:15:56,880
as far as being the voice of truth to these young people.

334
00:15:56,880 --> 00:15:57,800
So what happens?

335
00:15:57,800 --> 00:15:59,360
They get to social media,

336
00:15:59,360 --> 00:16:01,120
and anyone that is trending

337
00:16:01,120 --> 00:16:03,240
seems to be the one that is working.

338
00:16:03,240 --> 00:16:05,960
But you and I know that what is trending

339
00:16:05,960 --> 00:16:08,360
does not always mean that it is working.

340
00:16:08,360 --> 00:16:10,040
And the things that are trending,

341
00:16:10,040 --> 00:16:10,880
they are trending.

342
00:16:10,880 --> 00:16:12,320
Tomorrow they will not be trending.

343
00:16:12,320 --> 00:16:16,680
And so if a young people follows what is trending today,

344
00:16:16,680 --> 00:16:18,800
that is not the right thing to do,

345
00:16:18,800 --> 00:16:21,120
and they do it because it's trending,

346
00:16:21,120 --> 00:16:22,560
what happens is that tomorrow

347
00:16:22,560 --> 00:16:24,480
and that thing that is no longer trending,

348
00:16:24,480 --> 00:16:26,040
something else is trending,

349
00:16:26,040 --> 00:16:29,360
you find yourself to be in a sense of confusion

350
00:16:29,360 --> 00:16:30,200
because you're like,

351
00:16:30,200 --> 00:16:31,880
oh, I thought that was the right thing,

352
00:16:31,880 --> 00:16:34,040
but you forgot that that thing that was trending

353
00:16:34,040 --> 00:16:35,960
is not the thing that is working.

354
00:16:35,960 --> 00:16:37,920
So I think the biggest hurdle

355
00:16:37,920 --> 00:16:40,800
or the biggest issue we have is mentorship

356
00:16:40,800 --> 00:16:42,720
as far as young people is concerned.

357
00:16:42,720 --> 00:16:44,920
I think young people need to have,

358
00:16:46,920 --> 00:16:49,360
to be given an opportunity or a chance

359
00:16:49,360 --> 00:16:53,520
to receive mentorship from generations

360
00:16:53,520 --> 00:16:56,160
or people who are ahead of us

361
00:16:56,160 --> 00:16:58,680
so that we can learn,

362
00:16:58,680 --> 00:17:01,680
especially when we're talking about success, right?

363
00:17:01,680 --> 00:17:04,160
We can learn how do we get there

364
00:17:04,160 --> 00:17:05,680
because the reality is

365
00:17:05,680 --> 00:17:08,360
everything and everyone who has achieved

366
00:17:08,360 --> 00:17:11,200
a significant, tremendous result

367
00:17:11,200 --> 00:17:15,000
that we want to see as far as life and success is concerned,

368
00:17:15,000 --> 00:17:17,440
learned that thing somewhere.

369
00:17:17,440 --> 00:17:19,600
And if they didn't learn that thing,

370
00:17:19,600 --> 00:17:22,760
they have been able to obtain those things or those lessons

371
00:17:22,760 --> 00:17:25,440
through journeys that encountered mistakes,

372
00:17:25,440 --> 00:17:27,000
challenges and hurdles.

373
00:17:27,000 --> 00:17:30,280
And this next generation doesn't have to go through that.

374
00:17:30,280 --> 00:17:32,480
They can easily get to learn

375
00:17:32,480 --> 00:17:34,000
through someone else's challenges,

376
00:17:34,000 --> 00:17:36,240
someone else's mistake, instead of going through

377
00:17:36,240 --> 00:17:39,000
that mistakes on themselves.

378
00:17:39,000 --> 00:17:41,400
And if they don't have the stamina to overcome,

379
00:17:41,400 --> 00:17:43,680
that's where we get to mental health issues

380
00:17:43,680 --> 00:17:46,240
and they destroy our young people a lot.

381
00:17:46,240 --> 00:17:47,920
So I think the biggest issue we have

382
00:17:47,920 --> 00:17:50,000
is the lack of mentorship that young people

383
00:17:50,000 --> 00:17:52,320
really, really crave and desire.

384
00:17:52,320 --> 00:17:54,880
And how do you think someone should find a mentor?

385
00:17:54,880 --> 00:17:58,200
Like if I'm a young person and I don't know where to turn,

386
00:17:58,200 --> 00:18:00,400
maybe my parents don't know a lot

387
00:18:00,400 --> 00:18:03,000
or maybe all of my friends don't really wanna

388
00:18:03,000 --> 00:18:07,120
achieve, how do I find someone who is that person

389
00:18:07,120 --> 00:18:08,800
who can give me those lessons?

390
00:18:08,800 --> 00:18:15,800
First, I think the first step is first to be in a position

391
00:18:15,800 --> 00:18:20,800
or in an environment where you are challenged

392
00:18:20,800 --> 00:18:23,400
as far as your mindset is concerned.

393
00:18:23,400 --> 00:18:26,520
And not only being challenged on the mindset,

394
00:18:26,520 --> 00:18:31,800
but also before you look for someone to mentor you,

395
00:18:31,800 --> 00:18:36,400
you need to have that hunger or that urge

396
00:18:36,400 --> 00:18:39,000
to be, do or achieve a particular thing.

397
00:18:39,000 --> 00:18:44,600
And that might come automatically

398
00:18:44,600 --> 00:18:46,800
or it might not come automatically.

399
00:18:46,800 --> 00:18:49,600
And one of the reasons, if it comes automatically,

400
00:18:49,600 --> 00:18:53,800
then look for someone who is doing what you desire to become

401
00:18:53,800 --> 00:18:56,600
or who you desire to do it in a large scale.

402
00:18:56,600 --> 00:18:59,000
Learn from them or if you cannot access them,

403
00:18:59,000 --> 00:19:01,000
go buy their books, read their books,

404
00:19:01,000 --> 00:19:04,400
and be able to get the knowledge that they have invested

405
00:19:04,400 --> 00:19:06,200
as far as the book is concerned.

406
00:19:06,200 --> 00:19:08,800
The other thing is put yourself in an environment

407
00:19:08,800 --> 00:19:11,200
where you are challenged to be better.

408
00:19:11,200 --> 00:19:16,600
You see, if you do what is easy, your life will be hard.

409
00:19:16,600 --> 00:19:20,200
If you do what is hard, your life will be easy.

410
00:19:20,200 --> 00:19:22,600
And the reason as to why I'm saying that

411
00:19:22,600 --> 00:19:25,200
is that young people should not be scared

412
00:19:25,200 --> 00:19:27,800
by looking at a certain journey and thinking that

413
00:19:27,800 --> 00:19:30,800
this journey should not be a journey for me to achieve.

414
00:19:30,800 --> 00:19:34,000
It should not be a journey for me to take because it's hard.

415
00:19:34,000 --> 00:19:36,400
You have to understand and realize that if it was easy,

416
00:19:36,400 --> 00:19:38,600
everyone would have gone through it.

417
00:19:38,600 --> 00:19:40,600
It's the hardness that makes it great.

418
00:19:40,600 --> 00:19:45,400
And that hardness and greatness are on the same land.

419
00:19:45,400 --> 00:19:48,000
So if you are a young person and you're saying,

420
00:19:48,000 --> 00:19:50,400
you know what, I'm looking to get a mentor,

421
00:19:50,400 --> 00:19:53,200
the first thing is not to look to get a mentor.

422
00:19:53,200 --> 00:19:55,200
The first thing is to look at you.

423
00:19:55,200 --> 00:19:57,000
What do you want to become?

424
00:19:57,000 --> 00:19:58,400
Who do you want to be?

425
00:19:58,400 --> 00:20:00,000
By the time you reach age 70,

426
00:20:00,000 --> 00:20:01,400
will you look back with regrets

427
00:20:01,400 --> 00:20:03,200
or will you look back with satisfaction?

428
00:20:03,200 --> 00:20:06,800
Will you be a person who when you're 70 years old,

429
00:20:06,800 --> 00:20:08,200
will you say, you know what,

430
00:20:08,200 --> 00:20:10,400
I'm glad I went through this journey of life

431
00:20:10,400 --> 00:20:12,000
because of what I've been able to do,

432
00:20:12,000 --> 00:20:13,200
what I've been able to accomplish

433
00:20:13,200 --> 00:20:15,600
and the influence I've been able to make in this life?

434
00:20:15,600 --> 00:20:17,400
Or will you be a person who when you look back,

435
00:20:17,400 --> 00:20:19,000
you'll be like, you know what, life sucks

436
00:20:19,000 --> 00:20:20,600
and all that negative stuff?

437
00:20:20,600 --> 00:20:23,200
So I think that's the first step

438
00:20:23,200 --> 00:20:25,400
because there are two most important deaths

439
00:20:25,400 --> 00:20:27,000
in a human being's life, someone said.

440
00:20:27,000 --> 00:20:28,800
The death they were born and the death they realized

441
00:20:28,800 --> 00:20:30,400
they were born and as young people,

442
00:20:30,400 --> 00:20:33,000
I think the first question you have to ask yourself is,

443
00:20:33,000 --> 00:20:33,800
why are you born?

444
00:20:33,800 --> 00:20:36,000
Why do you exist into this life?

445
00:20:36,000 --> 00:20:39,400
And that when you know the why, you will know the how.

446
00:20:39,400 --> 00:20:42,400
When you know the why, you will know who needs to mentor me.

447
00:20:42,400 --> 00:20:43,600
When you know the why, you will know

448
00:20:43,600 --> 00:20:45,400
where can I get that mentorship?

449
00:20:45,400 --> 00:20:47,200
When you know the why, you will know

450
00:20:47,200 --> 00:20:49,400
how can I be able to do the thing

451
00:20:49,400 --> 00:20:51,600
so that I can be able to access that mentorship

452
00:20:51,600 --> 00:20:53,800
or that mentor that I want to get.

453
00:20:53,800 --> 00:20:56,600
So I think young people need to understand and realize

454
00:20:56,600 --> 00:20:58,400
that they have to know their why.

455
00:20:58,400 --> 00:21:00,200
And as we're talking about the why, David,

456
00:21:00,200 --> 00:21:03,200
I have to say this, that no one was born for a mistake

457
00:21:03,200 --> 00:21:05,400
and that we are all born for a reason

458
00:21:05,400 --> 00:21:07,800
and we will be in this world for a season.

459
00:21:09,600 --> 00:21:13,200
Okay, and that every one of us, we were born for a reason

460
00:21:13,200 --> 00:21:15,200
and we will be in this world for a season.

461
00:21:15,200 --> 00:21:18,200
And the thing for us to be able to make sure

462
00:21:18,200 --> 00:21:22,600
that that reason is relevant is when we maximize

463
00:21:22,600 --> 00:21:25,800
the time we have in the seasons that we've been blessed with.

464
00:21:25,800 --> 00:21:28,400
So that's the thing that young people need to understand

465
00:21:28,400 --> 00:21:30,600
and have, and once you have it, trust me,

466
00:21:30,600 --> 00:21:33,200
getting the mentor is the easiest thing

467
00:21:33,200 --> 00:21:35,400
because you already have to look for out.

468
00:21:35,400 --> 00:21:38,800
He did what I want to be or he did where I want to go

469
00:21:38,800 --> 00:21:41,800
or he achieved a certain thing that I want to achieve.

470
00:21:41,800 --> 00:21:43,000
I can learn from him.

471
00:21:43,000 --> 00:21:47,200
If I cannot access him, I will be able to read a book

472
00:21:47,200 --> 00:21:50,800
about him and learn what he did and be able to implement

473
00:21:50,800 --> 00:21:52,000
the things that he did.

474
00:21:52,000 --> 00:21:54,400
So I think that's how I can approach that question.

475
00:21:54,400 --> 00:22:01,400
Hmm. Since everyone who is young maybe doesn't all want

476
00:22:01,400 --> 00:22:03,600
to be a high achiever, what would you say to those people

477
00:22:03,600 --> 00:22:06,000
who are like, oh, I want to live a good life.

478
00:22:06,000 --> 00:22:09,600
I want to have a good job, have a family

479
00:22:09,600 --> 00:22:12,200
and I don't want to be exceptional, right?

480
00:22:12,200 --> 00:22:15,400
They want to maybe be exceptional and being a dad

481
00:22:15,400 --> 00:22:18,600
or something like that, but they don't want to achieve

482
00:22:18,600 --> 00:22:20,200
really highly in their careers.

483
00:22:21,200 --> 00:22:24,200
So you have to understand and realize that achievement

484
00:22:24,200 --> 00:22:26,800
is not about status.

485
00:22:26,800 --> 00:22:29,200
Achievement is about results.

486
00:22:29,200 --> 00:22:32,000
Even if you want to be a dad, you don't want to be just

487
00:22:32,000 --> 00:22:33,000
an ordinary dad.

488
00:22:33,000 --> 00:22:34,800
You want to be the best dad.

489
00:22:34,800 --> 00:22:37,400
Even if you just want to be in a job, you don't want to be

490
00:22:37,400 --> 00:22:39,600
just a job and just do the minimum.

491
00:22:39,600 --> 00:22:44,400
You want to do the best because the reality is being

492
00:22:44,400 --> 00:22:51,400
a high achiever is not about the status or getting to that level.

493
00:22:51,400 --> 00:22:56,000
It's about the results that you have been able to produce.

494
00:22:56,000 --> 00:23:00,800
And I always say you don't have to search or you don't have

495
00:23:00,800 --> 00:23:04,600
to crave to be a valuable person.

496
00:23:04,600 --> 00:23:08,200
Just provide high value and you will be a valuable person.

497
00:23:08,200 --> 00:23:11,800
And that person or that young person who is like, you know

498
00:23:11,800 --> 00:23:15,400
what, I don't want to be a high achiever or anything.

499
00:23:15,400 --> 00:23:16,400
I'll say this.

500
00:23:16,400 --> 00:23:19,200
I think the reason, I think the main thing you're saying

501
00:23:19,200 --> 00:23:22,800
is I don't want to be famous.

502
00:23:22,800 --> 00:23:27,400
Because the reality is being a high achiever is all that

503
00:23:27,400 --> 00:23:28,400
we are talking about.

504
00:23:28,400 --> 00:23:32,000
And being a high achiever doesn't mean that the world

505
00:23:32,000 --> 00:23:34,000
should know you.

506
00:23:34,000 --> 00:23:35,000
Right?

507
00:23:35,000 --> 00:23:39,000
I read something about when the U.S. took their first person

508
00:23:39,000 --> 00:23:43,800
to land on the moon.

509
00:23:43,800 --> 00:23:48,600
There was a story of a sweeper and he did the best.

510
00:23:48,600 --> 00:23:51,400
He did the best and he was asked why are you doing it?

511
00:23:51,400 --> 00:23:55,600
He's like I'm doing my best because we are taking the first

512
00:23:55,600 --> 00:23:57,600
man to land on the moon.

513
00:23:57,600 --> 00:24:00,400
And to him that is high achievement.

514
00:24:00,400 --> 00:24:03,400
He was satisfied and all that.

515
00:24:03,400 --> 00:24:04,400
Right?

516
00:24:04,400 --> 00:24:07,600
And did he want people like me to know about him?

517
00:24:07,600 --> 00:24:08,600
Probably not.

518
00:24:08,600 --> 00:24:11,200
But did he, do I know about him?

519
00:24:11,200 --> 00:24:12,200
Yes.

520
00:24:12,200 --> 00:24:19,000
I can say that results, results can take you to places where

521
00:24:19,000 --> 00:24:21,600
you have never been before.

522
00:24:21,600 --> 00:24:26,000
And it's not about me wanting to shine out there.

523
00:24:26,000 --> 00:24:28,000
Just don't seek that.

524
00:24:28,000 --> 00:24:30,200
Just seek to be effective.

525
00:24:30,200 --> 00:24:34,600
To do the best at the season and the opportunities that you have.

526
00:24:34,600 --> 00:24:37,800
Those are the things that will automatically come that you

527
00:24:37,800 --> 00:24:38,800
should never seek them.

528
00:24:38,800 --> 00:24:41,400
And even if it means to be the best, if even if it means to

529
00:24:41,400 --> 00:24:46,000
just have a family, be in a family or be a dad, be a mom.

530
00:24:46,000 --> 00:24:48,000
You don't just want to be an average mom.

531
00:24:48,000 --> 00:24:50,600
You want to be the mom that when your son, when your daughter

532
00:24:50,600 --> 00:24:54,000
grows up will be like I have the best dad at home.

533
00:24:54,000 --> 00:24:57,000
And if that to you is success, seek it.

534
00:24:57,000 --> 00:24:58,600
That's how I can say it.

535
00:24:58,600 --> 00:25:01,400
I really like that because I think it's really easy to get

536
00:25:01,400 --> 00:25:08,600
lost in making success be being known or being the best,

537
00:25:08,600 --> 00:25:11,800
being the best business or doing something that will be

538
00:25:11,800 --> 00:25:13,800
remembered in the history books.

539
00:25:13,800 --> 00:25:18,200
But the thing that usually brings you the happiness is

540
00:25:18,200 --> 00:25:20,200
being the best at being you.

541
00:25:20,200 --> 00:25:21,200
100%.

542
00:25:21,200 --> 00:25:23,400
And that's something that's really hard to get to the

543
00:25:23,400 --> 00:25:28,200
realization about because those people aren't out on social

544
00:25:28,200 --> 00:25:30,600
media telling you this is how you be the best at being you.

545
00:25:30,600 --> 00:25:33,000
They're probably nobody knows who they are.

546
00:25:33,000 --> 00:25:34,800
And maybe they're the best dad.

547
00:25:34,800 --> 00:25:36,200
Maybe they're the best accountant.

548
00:25:36,200 --> 00:25:38,200
Maybe they're the best whatever.

549
00:25:38,200 --> 00:25:39,200
Yep. Yep.

550
00:25:39,200 --> 00:25:40,200
So true.

551
00:25:40,200 --> 00:25:42,800
And we might never know about those people.

552
00:25:42,800 --> 00:25:46,400
But there's a difference between influencing the world

553
00:25:46,400 --> 00:25:49,000
and influencing your world.

554
00:25:49,000 --> 00:25:52,000
And many of us have the ability and the opportunity to

555
00:25:52,000 --> 00:25:56,200
influence our world even though we might not influence the

556
00:25:56,200 --> 00:25:57,200
world.

557
00:25:57,200 --> 00:25:59,200
And to me that is already success.

558
00:25:59,200 --> 00:26:05,200
And if your main goal, if your main vision is to be like you

559
00:26:05,200 --> 00:26:06,200
know what?

560
00:26:06,200 --> 00:26:09,200
I'll be the best as far as my community is concerned.

561
00:26:09,200 --> 00:26:10,800
Go for it.

562
00:26:10,800 --> 00:26:15,600
Do everything humanly possible to achieve that goal.

563
00:26:15,600 --> 00:26:18,800
But the whole essence is what is your goal?

564
00:26:18,800 --> 00:26:19,800
Right?

565
00:26:19,800 --> 00:26:20,800
The why.

566
00:26:20,800 --> 00:26:23,200
So that's the whole thing I can say.

567
00:26:23,200 --> 00:26:24,200
Yeah.

568
00:26:24,200 --> 00:26:29,200
So touching on what you were talking about earlier with

569
00:26:29,200 --> 00:26:33,200
becoming exceptional requires going through those challenges,

570
00:26:33,200 --> 00:26:34,400
fighting the battles.

571
00:26:34,400 --> 00:26:35,400
It's not easy.

572
00:26:35,400 --> 00:26:36,400
It's hard.

573
00:26:36,400 --> 00:26:39,800
What are some of those things on your path that have been hard?

574
00:26:39,800 --> 00:26:43,200
Some decisions you've had to take or things you've had to go

575
00:26:43,200 --> 00:26:47,400
through where you were down and get to that got you to where

576
00:26:47,400 --> 00:26:49,600
you are now.

577
00:26:49,600 --> 00:26:51,600
Hey man.

578
00:26:51,600 --> 00:26:58,200
There is always the flip side as far as any journey you're

579
00:26:58,200 --> 00:26:59,200
taking David.

580
00:26:59,200 --> 00:27:05,200
Let me give you one simple, simple that is very relevant.

581
00:27:05,200 --> 00:27:06,200
Example.

582
00:27:06,200 --> 00:27:11,200
I took a leap of faith to come to the U.S.

583
00:27:11,200 --> 00:27:16,400
I left everything as far as who I know, people who I grew up

584
00:27:16,400 --> 00:27:19,600
knowing, family, friends and all that.

585
00:27:19,600 --> 00:27:21,800
And that thing is hard man.

586
00:27:21,800 --> 00:27:26,600
And just imagine going to a place where it's totally

587
00:27:26,600 --> 00:27:27,600
different.

588
00:27:27,600 --> 00:27:31,200
Maybe you don't know anyone and you don't know how you're going

589
00:27:31,200 --> 00:27:32,200
to start.

590
00:27:32,200 --> 00:27:36,200
That to me was one of the toughest seasons of my life,

591
00:27:36,200 --> 00:27:41,200
being able to be in a position where it's a new ground,

592
00:27:41,200 --> 00:27:44,400
a new territory, you don't know anyone, but you're driven with

593
00:27:44,400 --> 00:27:47,200
that dream, that vision, that mission, that ambition.

594
00:27:47,200 --> 00:27:49,800
That was hard.

595
00:27:49,800 --> 00:27:50,800
That was hard.

596
00:27:50,800 --> 00:27:58,400
The other difficult thing that I can say, it's something that I

597
00:27:58,400 --> 00:28:04,800
encounter almost not every day but in many times, is the

598
00:28:04,800 --> 00:28:08,800
ability to say no.

599
00:28:08,800 --> 00:28:15,800
For example, like you have to say, for you to say yes to

600
00:28:15,800 --> 00:28:18,400
something, for you to say yes to your dreams, for you to say

601
00:28:18,400 --> 00:28:23,200
yes to a certain vision, man, there are things you will have

602
00:28:23,200 --> 00:28:24,200
not to do.

603
00:28:24,200 --> 00:28:28,200
There are places you will not go, not because those places

604
00:28:28,200 --> 00:28:31,200
are bad, but it's because those places don't fuel who you want

605
00:28:31,200 --> 00:28:32,200
to become.

606
00:28:32,200 --> 00:28:35,200
The associations you will not engage with, not because those

607
00:28:35,200 --> 00:28:39,000
associations are bad, but those associations won't lead you to

608
00:28:39,000 --> 00:28:40,000
where you want to be.

609
00:28:40,000 --> 00:28:44,400
There are places you won't go, not because you hate freedom,

610
00:28:44,400 --> 00:28:47,600
but it's because those places won't add any value as far as

611
00:28:47,600 --> 00:28:48,600
who you want to be.

612
00:28:48,600 --> 00:28:50,000
Are those places attractive?

613
00:28:50,000 --> 00:28:50,600
Yes.

614
00:28:50,600 --> 00:28:51,600
Are those people attractive?

615
00:28:51,600 --> 00:28:52,600
Yes.

616
00:28:52,600 --> 00:28:53,800
Are those activities good?

617
00:28:53,800 --> 00:28:54,400
Yes.

618
00:28:54,400 --> 00:28:58,000
Are those activities by the flesh you want to do that?

619
00:28:58,000 --> 00:29:01,600
Yes, but you're looking at who you want to become and you're

620
00:29:01,600 --> 00:29:06,000
looking at how that thing or that action will bring you back

621
00:29:06,000 --> 00:29:08,000
and you're like, no, I don't want to do that.

622
00:29:08,000 --> 00:29:11,800
So those are some of the daily challenges that you have to

623
00:29:11,800 --> 00:29:16,000
overcome as far as being the person who will stand out.

624
00:29:16,000 --> 00:29:19,000
It's like a sportsman, you know what?

625
00:29:19,000 --> 00:29:22,000
They want to rest, they want to chill, they want to sleep,

626
00:29:22,000 --> 00:29:25,400
but they want the Olympic gold at the same time.

627
00:29:25,400 --> 00:29:29,000
Will resting, chilling and sleeping give you that?

628
00:29:29,000 --> 00:29:30,000
Probably not.

629
00:29:30,000 --> 00:29:32,800
So you have to do what you don't like so that you can get what

630
00:29:32,800 --> 00:29:35,400
you like.

631
00:29:35,400 --> 00:29:37,400
So one of the things that happens, I think, with a lot of

632
00:29:37,400 --> 00:29:39,800
people who are very high achievers and are struggling

633
00:29:39,800 --> 00:29:43,800
going into the hard is maybe they can fall into burnout,

634
00:29:43,800 --> 00:29:46,800
to doing too much at once.

635
00:29:46,800 --> 00:29:50,800
And how do you prevent that from happening?

636
00:29:50,800 --> 00:29:59,800
So you need to understand and realize, David, that I always

637
00:29:59,800 --> 00:30:04,200
say if it costs your mental health, it's too expensive.

638
00:30:04,200 --> 00:30:08,000
And one of the things that you have to learn that I think I

639
00:30:08,000 --> 00:30:12,800
personally implement is being able to know what are the

640
00:30:12,800 --> 00:30:16,800
places, spaces and people that fuel you.

641
00:30:16,800 --> 00:30:17,800
Right?

642
00:30:17,800 --> 00:30:21,800
If a car is empty, it has to go to a gas station and get gas

643
00:30:21,800 --> 00:30:23,800
so that it can be able to progress.

644
00:30:23,800 --> 00:30:27,800
I think the same is to us human beings and to me specifically.

645
00:30:27,800 --> 00:30:28,800
This is a theory that I do.

646
00:30:28,800 --> 00:30:34,800
So I have a certain group of men that I reach out to,

647
00:30:34,800 --> 00:30:38,800
if I'm stuck and they are willing to listen to me,

648
00:30:38,800 --> 00:30:42,800
they are willing to encourage me and they are willing to fuel me.

649
00:30:42,800 --> 00:30:45,800
I also read a lot, man.

650
00:30:45,800 --> 00:30:50,800
I read self-help books so that I can be, that's one way that

651
00:30:50,800 --> 00:30:53,800
I've learned that if I do, I get fuel.

652
00:30:53,800 --> 00:30:54,800
Right?

653
00:30:54,800 --> 00:30:57,800
And another thing is that I'm a man of faith, you know,

654
00:30:57,800 --> 00:31:01,800
being able to be part of my community, my church community,

655
00:31:01,800 --> 00:31:08,800
my body of the church or people or studying the Word or being

656
00:31:08,800 --> 00:31:09,800
in the presence of the Lord.

657
00:31:09,800 --> 00:31:12,800
Those are some of the things that fuel me.

658
00:31:12,800 --> 00:31:17,800
And I realized that every time I am in a place where, you know what,

659
00:31:17,800 --> 00:31:20,800
battery low, those are some of the things that I have to do.

660
00:31:20,800 --> 00:31:25,800
And for me to prevent the scenario or the situation where the battery

661
00:31:25,800 --> 00:31:29,800
will be low, I have to do these things consistently so that I can

662
00:31:29,800 --> 00:31:34,800
have the consistency to be able to accomplish or be in the journey

663
00:31:34,800 --> 00:31:38,800
where I will always have the momentum so that I can be able to see

664
00:31:38,800 --> 00:31:43,800
the desired results or the desired success that I envision to have

665
00:31:43,800 --> 00:31:45,800
and I want to be at.

666
00:31:45,800 --> 00:31:46,800
Yeah.

667
00:31:46,800 --> 00:31:51,800
So your church is a big part of that process of refueling who you are,

668
00:31:51,800 --> 00:31:53,800
giving you more energy to keep going forward.

669
00:31:53,800 --> 00:31:54,800
I did go to your church service.

670
00:31:54,800 --> 00:31:55,800
Yeah, man.

671
00:31:55,800 --> 00:31:56,800
Thank you for coming.

672
00:31:56,800 --> 00:31:57,800
It was awesome.

673
00:31:57,800 --> 00:31:58,800
I hope it's not the last.

674
00:31:58,800 --> 00:32:04,800
Yeah, I was telling Andrew that I should take him some time to...

675
00:32:04,800 --> 00:32:05,800
Yep, yep.

676
00:32:05,800 --> 00:32:06,800
You have to come back again.

677
00:32:06,800 --> 00:32:07,800
Yeah.

678
00:32:07,800 --> 00:32:12,800
One of the things that actually stood out to me was how connected the community was.

679
00:32:12,800 --> 00:32:14,800
So I grew up in a Catholic household.

680
00:32:14,800 --> 00:32:20,800
I've been to a lot of Catholic services and it always feels very, very dead.

681
00:32:20,800 --> 00:32:22,800
Like, nobody really wants to be there.

682
00:32:22,800 --> 00:32:25,800
Everyone is just like, oh yeah, I have to go on a Sunday.

683
00:32:25,800 --> 00:32:29,800
Versus the difference was like, everyone was alive, it felt like.

684
00:32:29,800 --> 00:32:31,800
Everyone wanted to be there.

685
00:32:31,800 --> 00:32:35,800
And so, I'm not sure what it was and I was curious if you had any insight

686
00:32:35,800 --> 00:32:40,800
into why these two different communities, which are kind of centered around the same thing,

687
00:32:40,800 --> 00:32:43,800
they're both centered around Jesus, why are they so different?

688
00:32:43,800 --> 00:32:53,800
Yeah, I think, David, you have to understand that there is something that is more

689
00:32:53,800 --> 00:33:00,800
as far as us having that church, the church service experience that you had.

690
00:33:00,800 --> 00:33:04,800
First of all, we are a Protestant church.

691
00:33:04,800 --> 00:33:10,800
So, you know, Catholic and Protestants, they have different ways as far as how they do their masses.

692
00:33:10,800 --> 00:33:13,800
You call them masses and how they do their services on the other side.

693
00:33:13,800 --> 00:33:18,800
But that's a whole different story, which is a whole different topic.

694
00:33:18,800 --> 00:33:25,800
But what I wanted to say is you came to our church and predominantly that church has

695
00:33:25,800 --> 00:33:31,800
majority of them people who are Kenyans, who are from my country, right?

696
00:33:31,800 --> 00:33:38,800
And I think what you experienced is I cannot put it as a standard for church.

697
00:33:38,800 --> 00:33:46,800
I think what you experience is church with community that has a cultural aspect on it.

698
00:33:46,800 --> 00:33:51,800
Like, that's how we operate, like as Kenyans in Africa.

699
00:33:51,800 --> 00:33:56,800
That's how we, you know, engage and associate.

700
00:33:56,800 --> 00:34:02,800
And to us, being in a church is a moment of celebration, a moment of honoring God,

701
00:34:02,800 --> 00:34:05,800
thanking God, and glorifying God.

702
00:34:05,800 --> 00:34:12,800
And what you experience is something that is not only what a church service entails,

703
00:34:12,800 --> 00:34:17,800
you also experience what our culture entails.

704
00:34:17,800 --> 00:34:23,800
So I can say that that doesn't, of course, you had a good moment and a good time,

705
00:34:23,800 --> 00:34:27,800
which I'm glad you did, and thank you for honoring the invitation.

706
00:34:27,800 --> 00:34:32,800
But at the same time, I can say we are a happy community, a happy church, and all that,

707
00:34:32,800 --> 00:34:35,800
but that doesn't make us perfect, right?

708
00:34:35,800 --> 00:34:39,800
And that's a difference that I think we have to embrace.

709
00:34:39,800 --> 00:34:44,800
But do we strive for perfection? Yes. Are we there? No.

710
00:34:44,800 --> 00:34:47,800
And because, you know, we are human beings at the end of the day.

711
00:34:47,800 --> 00:34:53,800
But what I can say is that you encountered something cultural that we embrace

712
00:34:53,800 --> 00:35:00,800
so that we can make our fellowship more fun, more engaging, and more welcoming. Yeah.

713
00:35:00,800 --> 00:35:03,800
Yeah. And maybe that's just a general thing with American culture,

714
00:35:03,800 --> 00:35:11,800
where people are very individualistic, and maybe Kenyans and team seems to revolve more around that community aspect.

715
00:35:11,800 --> 00:35:14,800
Yeah, we are community-driven, 100%. Yeah.

716
00:35:14,800 --> 00:35:23,800
How can we have kind of that be more present in our lives in the United States if we're not from Kenya?

717
00:35:23,800 --> 00:35:26,800
And that, I mean, that's the thing that everyone should experience, I think,

718
00:35:26,800 --> 00:35:31,800
is a great, vibrant community where everyone feels connected to each other.

719
00:35:31,800 --> 00:35:40,800
That's a difficult question, man. But I think it's the aspect of just care for each other, man.

720
00:35:40,800 --> 00:35:45,800
Just care for each other and add value for each other.

721
00:35:45,800 --> 00:35:49,800
And there are a lot of great things about the United States, David.

722
00:35:49,800 --> 00:35:55,800
There are a lot of great things that are vibrant and all that.

723
00:35:55,800 --> 00:36:01,800
But when you're talking about that aspect of culture, I think,

724
00:36:01,800 --> 00:36:09,800
caring and just seeking to learn more about the other person and being more engaged about them,

725
00:36:09,800 --> 00:36:16,800
I think that's something that plays a significant role as far as embracing that is concerned.

726
00:36:16,800 --> 00:36:19,800
And maybe visit Kenya more.

727
00:36:19,800 --> 00:36:24,800
Yeah, maybe I'll move to Kenya.

728
00:36:24,800 --> 00:36:28,800
But you work a lot and you also have a wife and a kid now.

729
00:36:28,800 --> 00:36:29,800
Yep.

730
00:36:29,800 --> 00:36:31,800
How are you able to balance all of that?

731
00:36:31,800 --> 00:36:37,800
Well, I have to say, David, that first of all, I'm blessed to have a very, very supportive wife.

732
00:36:37,800 --> 00:36:44,800
I think I'm blessed to have a wife that understands what I want to become.

733
00:36:44,800 --> 00:36:53,800
And she sacrifices a lot in terms of making sure that I get to the point where I want to get.

734
00:36:53,800 --> 00:36:57,800
And I think I'm so blessed for that.

735
00:36:57,800 --> 00:37:04,800
I think she plays a critical role as far as the day-to-day journey,

736
00:37:04,800 --> 00:37:11,800
as far as being in the journey of purpose and being in the journey of realizing that destiny that I dream of.

737
00:37:11,800 --> 00:37:23,800
The other thing is I think I have systems set in place that really, really help me to be able to achieve a particular thing,

738
00:37:23,800 --> 00:37:27,800
to help me achieve a particular thing at any particular time.

739
00:37:27,800 --> 00:37:36,800
And those systems are structured in a way where there is time for family, there is time for work,

740
00:37:36,800 --> 00:37:41,800
there is time for personal development, there is time for spiritual growth, and also there is time for me.

741
00:37:41,800 --> 00:37:47,800
Like my working out and you and I, we know you're in college, you used to hit the gym together and I still do that.

742
00:37:47,800 --> 00:37:55,800
Time for working out, time for just the personal development aspect of me.

743
00:37:55,800 --> 00:38:00,800
So I think I have things, I have those structures in my life,

744
00:38:00,800 --> 00:38:09,800
and that's anything that takes me away of those structures personally, I don't not only do them, but also don't entertain them.

745
00:38:09,800 --> 00:38:12,800
Be it in thoughts, be it in actions, be it in words.

746
00:38:12,800 --> 00:38:24,800
So I think the system helps me a lot in terms of being able to, number one, balance, and also number two, enjoy doing what I'm doing.

747
00:38:24,800 --> 00:38:27,800
And how long have you been married?

748
00:38:27,800 --> 00:38:32,800
In 10 days from now, it will be one year.

749
00:38:32,800 --> 00:38:37,800
That one year ago, how did you know that this was the path you were going to go on?

750
00:38:37,800 --> 00:38:40,800
Actually, my wife is a childhood friend.

751
00:38:40,800 --> 00:38:41,800
Oh really?

752
00:38:41,800 --> 00:38:49,800
Yeah, yeah, yeah. She's a childhood friend. I've known her all my life and we've grown up together, literally we were neighbors back in Kenya.

753
00:38:49,800 --> 00:38:56,800
And it has always been a surety that this is the woman that I want.

754
00:38:56,800 --> 00:38:59,800
So that's how it's always been.

755
00:38:59,800 --> 00:39:01,800
Since you were a young boy, you knew?

756
00:39:01,800 --> 00:39:13,800
No, no, no. Well, she says she knew that when she was a little girl, but I think I knew that behind every saint there is a past and ahead of every sinner there is a future.

757
00:39:13,800 --> 00:39:19,800
So I think I knew it when I was much, much older in life.

758
00:39:19,800 --> 00:39:20,800
So yeah.

759
00:39:20,800 --> 00:39:22,800
Like, did you date other people in between there?

760
00:39:22,800 --> 00:39:23,800
Of course.

761
00:39:23,800 --> 00:39:24,800
Yeah.

762
00:39:24,800 --> 00:39:28,800
What was dating like for you before you got married?

763
00:39:28,800 --> 00:39:33,800
Before I got married, dating for me was, so I was looking for someone.

764
00:39:33,800 --> 00:39:39,800
So first of all, David, I think I became very focused from a very, very young age.

765
00:39:39,800 --> 00:39:47,800
And to me, I was looking not just for someone to have fun with, I was looking for someone to create purpose with.

766
00:39:47,800 --> 00:40:00,800
And that's something that I think the reason as to why my previous dating people I dated with didn't work was because I think I didn't find that.

767
00:40:00,800 --> 00:40:16,800
Where someone who we were in the same path as far as purpose is concerned. And that's how it always, that's why that was the experience rather as far as my dating journey is concerned.

768
00:40:16,800 --> 00:40:33,800
And to me, I've always looked for someone who could see the world the way I saw it, who could look at the things that I dreamt of or the things that I envisioned and the person I want to become in life and never thought I was crazy.

769
00:40:33,800 --> 00:40:38,800
And well, there's some girls I dated, they're like, yeah, you're crazy. You can't be that.

770
00:40:38,800 --> 00:40:40,800
Yeah.

771
00:40:40,800 --> 00:40:49,800
And were any of those relationships longer? Like, did it take you longer to figure out that this wasn't a person who understood what you wanted?

772
00:40:49,800 --> 00:40:58,800
It's well, well, it didn't take a long time for me to know, but it took a long time for me to accept.

773
00:40:58,800 --> 00:41:05,800
You know, you can be in a relationship with someone and you're like, you know what, this, I don't think we're going to take.

774
00:41:05,800 --> 00:41:12,800
I don't think we're going to go far with this person, but you're like, let me give her a chance.

775
00:41:12,800 --> 00:41:22,800
And accepting that thing that you saw from the beginning was, you know, you tolerate it and you give it a benefit of doubt.

776
00:41:22,800 --> 00:41:30,800
But I learned that you're not trying to heal it, you're just procrastinating as far as the pain is concerned.

777
00:41:30,800 --> 00:41:35,800
Yeah. Yeah. Putting off the pain till the future date, making it worse every time.

778
00:41:35,800 --> 00:41:39,800
Making it worse. The longer you wait, the longer the worse it gets.

779
00:41:39,800 --> 00:41:41,800
Yeah, because you have to make that decision.

780
00:41:41,800 --> 00:41:44,800
You have to make that decision regardless. You have to make.

781
00:41:44,800 --> 00:41:49,800
And talking of dating, I think a lot of young men are struggling with this.

782
00:41:49,800 --> 00:41:51,800
I never dated many women, first of all.

783
00:41:51,800 --> 00:42:01,800
I think, but my experience is that I think as a young man, if you if you're dating a girl or a woman and you're like, I don't think this thing will work.

784
00:42:01,800 --> 00:42:13,800
And you're certain, I think the longer you wait, as far as making that move, I think it's a harm not only to her, but significantly to you,

785
00:42:13,800 --> 00:42:22,800
because it's going to hurt more and longer the more you wait because their expectations being set by the other party.

786
00:42:22,800 --> 00:42:28,800
And you already have a decision in your heart that you're not going to meet those expectations.

787
00:42:28,800 --> 00:42:37,800
And that girl may be waiting for that expectation. And the longer you wait, the harder, the painful the heartbreak will be.

788
00:42:37,800 --> 00:42:49,800
So that's that's how I will say. And also, like as a young man, like one of the best decisions that you can make is who you decide to spend your life with as far as life partner is concerned.

789
00:42:49,800 --> 00:42:58,800
And I think you either have a wife that will support you or you have a knife that will cut you.

790
00:42:58,800 --> 00:43:01,800
That's brutal.

791
00:43:01,800 --> 00:43:15,800
And the same to husbands, you know, like even like if it's a woman, listen to me like and by cutting, I don't mean physically cutting in terms of your purpose, cutting in terms of your vision, cutting in terms of your dreams.

792
00:43:15,800 --> 00:43:16,800
There will always be friction.

793
00:43:16,800 --> 00:43:22,800
They will be cut short. So that's that's that's how I can say it. And sorry if it appears blue rollers.

794
00:43:22,800 --> 00:43:29,800
Oh, no, I think it's a good way to emphasize the impact it will have.

795
00:43:29,800 --> 00:43:35,800
Significant. I'm talking it out of love and and and not as an expert for whatsoever.

796
00:43:35,800 --> 00:43:40,800
But based on my own personal experience and what I've been also been able to learn from other people.

797
00:43:40,800 --> 00:43:45,800
Yeah, like your experience has been on both sides. You've had one that supports you and maybe one that doesn't support you.

798
00:43:45,800 --> 00:43:48,800
A hundred percent. A hundred percent.

799
00:43:48,800 --> 00:43:49,800
You've seen the impacts of both of them.

800
00:43:49,800 --> 00:43:59,800
A hundred percent. A hundred percent. And and yeah, of course, I have I dated girls that held me back. Yes.

801
00:43:59,800 --> 00:44:02,800
And now I'm blessed. My wife is. Yeah.

802
00:44:02,800 --> 00:44:06,800
It's part of the party. Yeah. A hundred percent. Yeah.

803
00:44:06,800 --> 00:44:15,800
And now in the in our current time, we have dating apps, we have all these different types of ways to find people.

804
00:44:15,800 --> 00:44:22,800
And maybe you didn't have those back then, but you are on the Internet, you are on social media and you mentor young men.

805
00:44:22,800 --> 00:44:29,800
What do you what advice do you give to to men trying to navigate that world of dating and a new technology focused way of dating?

806
00:44:29,800 --> 00:44:33,800
It's the most common way of finding a partner these days is online.

807
00:44:33,800 --> 00:44:41,800
A hundred percent. And first of all, I'll say I'll say

808
00:44:41,800 --> 00:44:50,800
the systems may change as far as how you can get a life partner, but the principles and the foundations will never change.

809
00:44:50,800 --> 00:44:56,800
You can you can pretend who you are, but in the long run, you will always be discovered.

810
00:44:56,800 --> 00:45:10,800
So I think as a as a young man specifically, as you as you look to get for a for a partner, I think, I think one of the biggest thing you have to understand is be a man who has a vision

811
00:45:10,800 --> 00:45:20,800
or grow yourself to be a man who knows what they want in life, because at the end of the day, men are supposed to be providers, protectors and procedures leaders.

812
00:45:20,800 --> 00:45:30,800
Right. If you're if you're not able to have those things as foundations for you, you know, you can get the best girl in the world online or offline.

813
00:45:30,800 --> 00:45:36,800
But it takes one thing to get her and it takes another thing to maintain her.

814
00:45:36,800 --> 00:45:49,800
So I'll tell young men that the biggest foundation is to be able to learn how to maintain, because if you are able to learn how to maintain, look, it's attractive men.

815
00:45:49,800 --> 00:45:55,800
A girl will see you and they'll know this man, how they carry themselves, how they behave and how they live.

816
00:45:55,800 --> 00:46:00,800
This is a man who I would want. So you won't be able to be the person who will chase.

817
00:46:00,800 --> 00:46:08,800
You'll be the one who will attract. So I think that's that's something I can say for specifically young men out there listening to us right now.

818
00:46:08,800 --> 00:46:19,800
And how does how does a young man go from being just the guy who's there, who's not attracting people to what you said, a protector provider and was the third one?

819
00:46:19,800 --> 00:46:31,800
Preceder leader. Yeah. Know exactly what you want out of life, man. Know know, you know, in this journey of life, like what what do you want?

820
00:46:31,800 --> 00:46:33,800
What do you want? What do I want to become?

821
00:46:33,800 --> 00:46:40,800
Like if you don't know where you're going, David, anywhere that is looking like a destination for you will be OK for you.

822
00:46:40,800 --> 00:46:50,800
Right. And I think young people need to know first, what do I want to become? Who do I want to become? And where do I want to go?

823
00:46:50,800 --> 00:46:59,800
The moment you know those questions, those fundamental questions, I think you will know who will fit in your boat and who will not.

824
00:46:59,800 --> 00:47:09,800
Because at the end of the day, if you are if you are looking to get someone or looking to be in a relationship of someone, I believe you.

825
00:47:09,800 --> 00:47:19,800
You either date for marriage or you date for a heartbreak because a relationship with either end for it will either end to marriage or it will end on the other side of a heartbreak.

826
00:47:19,800 --> 00:47:25,800
And ask yourself what is worth it. So you have to be very intentional about it.

827
00:47:25,800 --> 00:47:35,800
But before you get there, you need to ask yourself, am I am I ready to handle and maintain someone if I cannot handle and maintain from it cannot handle and maintain myself.

828
00:47:35,800 --> 00:47:48,800
So I think as a young person, the first thing you want to do is focus on knowing and understanding who you are, what you want to become before inviting someone on the boat to go to where you want to be.

829
00:47:48,800 --> 00:47:52,800
Right. And I will I will not go without saying that I'm a man of faith.

830
00:47:52,800 --> 00:48:13,800
I think knowing your creator and knowing and being intentional about that adds a significant value as far as you being a man who will not only show direction, but you will also have that divine assignment so that you can be the person that God created you to become.

831
00:48:13,800 --> 00:48:16,800
Yeah.

832
00:48:16,800 --> 00:48:23,800
I like the idea of finding who you are before figuring out if you can maintain someone.

833
00:48:23,800 --> 00:48:26,800
But I think it's also possible to get lost in that.

834
00:48:26,800 --> 00:48:31,800
So on the Internet, there's a lot of young people who are working on myself.

835
00:48:31,800 --> 00:48:42,800
I'm building something and then they continue to do that for a really, really long time and they never find who they are and they never get into relationships, never explore that.

836
00:48:42,800 --> 00:48:46,800
And maybe it's because they're scared, maybe because they don't want to be seen.

837
00:48:46,800 --> 00:48:50,800
And so they continue to build up and build up and build up and never get there.

838
00:48:50,800 --> 00:48:57,800
Yeah. So I'll say this, David. I'll say this. I'll say this.

839
00:48:57,800 --> 00:49:06,800
First of all, I'll say that there is no one way of knowing who you are or one way of achieving a certain success in life.

840
00:49:06,800 --> 00:49:18,800
Let me give you an example. You might meet a girl who can be a person who will be crucial as far as getting you into the direction of purpose and the direction of the destiny in your life.

841
00:49:18,800 --> 00:49:26,800
So by me saying that, I'm not saying that you don't engage with girls. No, no, no, no.

842
00:49:26,800 --> 00:49:30,800
I don't want you to be that guy. All I'm saying is...

843
00:49:30,800 --> 00:49:31,800
The Sigma.

844
00:49:31,800 --> 00:49:33,800
Yeah.

845
00:49:33,800 --> 00:49:39,800
I don't want you to be that guy. All I'm saying is, you know, I believe on the aspect of being intentional.

846
00:49:39,800 --> 00:49:42,800
If you're intentional, you will be exceptional.

847
00:49:42,800 --> 00:49:49,800
And to bring all this to simplicity is just be intentional in everything that you're doing.

848
00:49:49,800 --> 00:49:55,800
If you're intentional with everything that you're doing, it's just a matter of time. You will be exceptional.

849
00:49:55,800 --> 00:49:59,800
And there is a difference between movement and progress.

850
00:49:59,800 --> 00:50:07,800
You know, I'm doing this just for that feeling to know that I'm moving, but in reality, you're not making progress.

851
00:50:07,800 --> 00:50:15,800
And I think that's where the conversation of mentorship comes in, because the reality is doing something is not enough.

852
00:50:15,800 --> 00:50:18,800
You have to do things right. Right?

853
00:50:18,800 --> 00:50:27,800
And having the awareness of knowing what your KPIs are, key performance indicators for your life, is very, very important

854
00:50:27,800 --> 00:50:35,800
to the fact that you will be able to be that human being who just doesn't live life for the sake of living life,

855
00:50:35,800 --> 00:50:41,800
but is living life knowing that this is the goal, this is the mission, and this is the target.

856
00:50:41,800 --> 00:50:45,800
And you know, this is what I need to get to that target.

857
00:50:45,800 --> 00:50:54,800
And if you focus on that, when it comes to relationship, you will always know this person cannot fit to the destination that I want to go.

858
00:50:54,800 --> 00:51:00,800
You can always know, even if you're not dating that girl, but if you just interact with them as friends and you're like,

859
00:51:00,800 --> 00:51:04,800
oh, this looks like the person. Yeah.

860
00:51:04,800 --> 00:51:13,800
So that's how I think it's supposed to be. So it's not like movement. It's about progress. Yeah.

861
00:51:13,800 --> 00:51:19,800
Movement can take you in. You can just doggy paddle on the ocean forever. You're not moving anywhere.

862
00:51:19,800 --> 00:51:21,800
Cycling, yep. Yep.

863
00:51:21,800 --> 00:51:29,800
So for you, what are some of those things that you're struggling with in different areas of your life?

864
00:51:29,800 --> 00:51:33,800
Maybe it's yourself. Maybe it's your career. Maybe it's your relationship or your passions.

865
00:51:33,800 --> 00:51:39,800
David, when you're talking about struggles, I think struggles happens in seasons.

866
00:51:39,800 --> 00:51:45,800
Like the things I was struggling with five years ago are not the same things probably I'm struggling with today.

867
00:51:45,800 --> 00:51:55,800
In the current season that I am, I think the biggest struggle that I have is the ability to handle the demands that come.

868
00:51:55,800 --> 00:52:03,800
And these demands are the demands that it takes for me to coach people and all that.

869
00:52:03,800 --> 00:52:17,800
And it can be a bit overwhelming to handle the demands that come as far as coaching people, training people and all that.

870
00:52:17,800 --> 00:52:24,800
I think I'm in a season where I'm still learning how to create a system out of that.

871
00:52:24,800 --> 00:52:31,800
Because if I don't, maybe I'll burn out or maybe I won't be as effective as I should.

872
00:52:31,800 --> 00:52:39,800
The other struggle I'm having is I'm building other things.

873
00:52:39,800 --> 00:52:48,800
One of the things that I see is a big struggle is to get people who can see the vision as you see it and run with it together.

874
00:52:48,800 --> 00:52:55,800
I think the other things that I'm currently working on and building and exploring,

875
00:52:55,800 --> 00:53:05,800
which I've shared with you on a personal level, and getting people who are going to see the vision that you're having and running with it,

876
00:53:05,800 --> 00:53:07,800
I think it's a big, big struggle.

877
00:53:07,800 --> 00:53:19,800
And I think even you as you're running your podcast, I think as you grow, you will want to expand and you will want to get to horizons that you've never gotten.

878
00:53:19,800 --> 00:53:30,800
I think one thing that can be a significant struggle is to be able to find people who have a similar vision like yours

879
00:53:30,800 --> 00:53:38,800
and be able to operate not exactly like you, but with the drive like yours or even more.

880
00:53:38,800 --> 00:53:42,800
So I think that's a struggle that I'm currently having.

881
00:53:42,800 --> 00:53:48,800
Yeah. And how do you think you'll find them?

882
00:53:48,800 --> 00:53:54,800
I'm not impatient about it.

883
00:53:54,800 --> 00:54:05,800
I'm only patient about it. And I know that with consistency, sometimes people will buy into a vision until they see that thing working first.

884
00:54:05,800 --> 00:54:16,800
So I think I want to make some things work, make the initiatives and the programs that I'm building to make them work first.

885
00:54:16,800 --> 00:54:26,800
I think sometimes that will attract people because, and I understand, man, if you want something to do something with you,

886
00:54:26,800 --> 00:54:34,800
if you want someone to do something with you and they all they know is you have that in mind and not in reality, it can be difficult.

887
00:54:34,800 --> 00:54:45,800
So I think the only thing is making that thing to germinate first so that people can see it's working at a small scale so that they can get to it to explode it in a large scale.

888
00:54:45,800 --> 00:54:55,800
And along with the part you're talking about, the demands of everything you're doing, how are you handling that right now?

889
00:54:55,800 --> 00:54:58,800
And do you feel overwhelmed at all?

890
00:54:58,800 --> 00:55:03,800
Yeah, sometimes, man. Sometimes I do feel overwhelmed, David.

891
00:55:03,800 --> 00:55:10,800
But at the end of the day, I think to whom much is given, much is expected.

892
00:55:10,800 --> 00:55:15,800
And life doesn't get easier. You just learn how to handle hard better.

893
00:55:15,800 --> 00:55:25,800
So it's not about expecting things to be easy, but it's about how to learn how to handle the hard things in a better way or in an easier way.

894
00:55:25,800 --> 00:55:32,800
Because the reality is every time you grow, you expand and stretch and your capacity grows.

895
00:55:32,800 --> 00:55:36,800
And if your capacity grows, there's always an extra space that needs to be filled.

896
00:55:36,800 --> 00:55:41,800
So you got to do it anyway. But at the end of the day, it's about the systems also.

897
00:55:41,800 --> 00:55:50,800
I talked about the people who are engaged with my association, my habits and also being a man of faith.

898
00:55:50,800 --> 00:55:55,800
And on your journey, when do you think your finish line is? What are you aiming at?

899
00:55:55,800 --> 00:56:01,800
What is the person that you want to be? And how do you know you've arrived?

900
00:56:01,800 --> 00:56:09,800
You know, that's something that I've learned recently, actually, David. You know, you'll be surprised that in life there's nothing like a finish line.

901
00:56:09,800 --> 00:56:21,800
In life, you will always have a new demand and a new thorn that will be hurting you unless you do something about it.

902
00:56:21,800 --> 00:56:36,800
And when it comes to the journey of purpose, if you say you have arrived at a certain level, there is always something that will be like a new vision that you have to get to.

903
00:56:36,800 --> 00:56:53,800
And I think it's not about arriving. It's about being able to be in a position or a situation in your life where you're being productive.

904
00:56:53,800 --> 00:57:01,800
I think that as long as you're breathing, I believe there is always something you can be producing. Yeah.

905
00:57:01,800 --> 00:57:12,800
Along that question, if things continue to be possible to continue to work, to continue to progress, how do we know when enough's enough, right?

906
00:57:12,800 --> 00:57:19,800
Because one of the stories I heard on a podcast, which I really like, is the story of the Mexican fisherman.

907
00:57:19,800 --> 00:57:27,800
There's this guy in Mexico. He spends his day fishing. He comes home. They eat. They hang out around the fire, sing songs.

908
00:57:27,800 --> 00:57:36,800
He sees his friends, and he goes to bed and does it all over again. And then this guy from America is on vacation. He meets this guy and he goes,

909
00:57:36,800 --> 00:57:42,800
You're so good at fishing. Why don't you do it a few more extra hours a day? Then you'd have extra fish and you could sell it on the market.

910
00:57:42,800 --> 00:57:48,800
And then after that, hire other people with that extra money and then sell even more fish on the market.

911
00:57:48,800 --> 00:57:54,800
And then once you have enough money there, you can build a corporation and expand to different areas of the world and make even more money.

912
00:57:54,800 --> 00:57:58,800
And then you can retire. He's like, Why would I do that?

913
00:57:58,800 --> 00:58:05,800
He goes, So you could hang out with your friends, spend time with your family, sing songs around the fire, and spend time fishing.

914
00:58:05,800 --> 00:58:09,800
And he's like, I already do all of that. Why would I give up any of it?

915
00:58:09,800 --> 00:58:17,800
So a lot of times we can give up the thing that we want for the thing that we think will get what we want.

916
00:58:17,800 --> 00:58:22,800
And I think that's really hard when you're a high achiever is when do you know when enough's enough?

917
00:58:22,800 --> 00:58:30,800
There's people who die working and they go, I never actually lived my life. I spent my entire time achieving.

918
00:58:30,800 --> 00:58:40,800
I think it's from an individual perspective in terms of what the success looks like for you.

919
00:58:40,800 --> 00:58:46,800
There are people that their success is money. There are people that their success is family.

920
00:58:46,800 --> 00:58:53,800
There are people that their success is a certain body type. There are people that their success is all that.

921
00:58:53,800 --> 00:59:00,800
I think I think having an understanding of what success looks like is very, very important.

922
00:59:00,800 --> 00:59:07,800
And I think I've read that story from one of Robin Sharma's book.

923
00:59:07,800 --> 00:59:12,800
One of Robin Sharma's book. I don't know. I don't know which one, but I think I read that there.

924
00:59:12,800 --> 00:59:31,800
But to bring to your point, David, I think being successful or the measure to equate or the measure to define success is not monetary.

925
00:59:31,800 --> 00:59:44,800
I think to me, I think the measure to equate success is impact. Like who have you impacted? Who has gotten better because of you existing in this world?

926
00:59:44,800 --> 00:59:55,800
And to me, I think as long as I'm living to do that and there is satisfaction, I'm good.

927
00:59:55,800 --> 01:00:04,800
And being better is you can go to Kenya and do it. You can stay in the U.S. and do it.

928
01:00:04,800 --> 01:00:15,800
You can go to any other country and do it. But it's all about it's not about what you get, but it's about what you give.

929
01:00:15,800 --> 01:00:21,800
And it's about what people feel based on what you're producing.

930
01:00:21,800 --> 01:00:26,800
So I think it's life in general is all about people and even the money.

931
01:00:26,800 --> 01:00:31,800
Yeah. Even in your story, you get the money so that you can sing songs with friends.

932
01:00:31,800 --> 01:00:42,800
It's all about people like people, people, people. I think if you have a way of influencing and impacting people positively, you are successful.

933
01:00:42,800 --> 01:00:45,800
And that's that's that's how my perspective will be about that.

934
01:00:45,800 --> 01:00:56,800
That matter, because at the end of the day, even if you have all that money and all that cash, where you have no one to spend it with, no one to pay so that they can serve you,

935
01:00:56,800 --> 01:01:07,800
no one to share it with or no one to transform as far as using your money to change their lives is concerned, that money will be useless.

936
01:01:07,800 --> 01:01:16,800
So I think it's about people like how do you how are you are you a person who influences and transforms the lives of people?

937
01:01:16,800 --> 01:01:19,800
I think that's all that matters. Yeah.

938
01:01:19,800 --> 01:01:22,800
Most things actually come down to impact even businesses.

939
01:01:22,800 --> 01:01:24,800
Yeah, even businesses. Correct.

940
01:01:24,800 --> 01:01:29,800
How do you build a business that works? You build something itself, someone's problem, you impact them. Right.

941
01:01:29,800 --> 01:01:31,800
100% 100%. Yeah.

942
01:01:31,800 --> 01:01:46,800
One of the questions that I've come to ask myself is what thing about the way in which I view the world or the way I interact with the world would I want to change

943
01:01:46,800 --> 01:01:50,800
that would impact my life the most in a positive direction?

944
01:01:50,800 --> 01:01:54,800
And for me, it came down to a couple of character traits.

945
01:01:54,800 --> 01:01:56,800
I wish I was more assertive.

946
01:01:56,800 --> 01:01:58,800
And so now that's something that I can work on doing.

947
01:01:58,800 --> 01:02:05,800
It's like that would have a huge impact on my future and my all of the different areas of my life.

948
01:02:05,800 --> 01:02:08,800
So I would ask that same question to you.

949
01:02:08,800 --> 01:02:11,800
What is that that small thing?

950
01:02:11,800 --> 01:02:14,800
To me, it's courageous, courage.

951
01:02:14,800 --> 01:02:16,800
And I actually wrote a book about this.

952
01:02:16,800 --> 01:02:18,800
It's called Protect Your Courage.

953
01:02:18,800 --> 01:02:19,800
It's on Amazon.

954
01:02:19,800 --> 01:02:28,800
I think many people are not courageous to believe in what they feel or they think they can be.

955
01:02:28,800 --> 01:02:35,800
And that hinders them from getting to where they desire to become or where they think they can become.

956
01:02:35,800 --> 01:02:42,800
And fear and doubt has killed many dreams than failure ever has.

957
01:02:42,800 --> 01:02:45,800
So I think to me, it's courage.

958
01:02:45,800 --> 01:02:53,800
Most people need courage so that they can be able to operate in the path that they believe or they envision they can.

959
01:02:53,800 --> 01:02:57,800
And that's a big factor that most people do not have.

960
01:02:57,800 --> 01:03:00,800
And I think it's something that we need to embrace.

961
01:03:00,800 --> 01:03:10,800
We need to learn how to be courageous to do or to chase that journey or to follow that path that is very unfamiliar.

962
01:03:10,800 --> 01:03:20,800
But faith drives us because we see there is something that we can be or get or achieve, even though we are not yet there.

963
01:03:20,800 --> 01:03:23,800
And even though we cannot see it in the physical.

964
01:03:23,800 --> 01:03:24,800
Yeah.

965
01:03:24,800 --> 01:03:27,800
How has not being courageous impacted your life?

966
01:03:27,800 --> 01:03:29,800
Oh, man, there are many opportunities.

967
01:03:29,800 --> 01:03:34,800
Hey, there are many opportunities I wish I took.

968
01:03:34,800 --> 01:03:38,800
But because I was looking at it, I was like, I'm not too qualified for that.

969
01:03:38,800 --> 01:03:46,800
I'm not too fit for that or I'm not too educated for that or I'm not too qualified for that.

970
01:03:46,800 --> 01:03:50,800
That made me not to even try.

971
01:03:50,800 --> 01:03:55,800
And only God knows where I would have been if I took some of those opportunities.

972
01:03:55,800 --> 01:03:57,800
And yeah, I think it's the same.

973
01:03:57,800 --> 01:04:06,800
And on the on the front side is there are things that I didn't even qualify that I only tried or I showed up.

974
01:04:06,800 --> 01:04:13,800
And they played a big role as far as helping me succeed in different areas as far as life is concerned.

975
01:04:13,800 --> 01:04:15,800
So courage. Yeah.

976
01:04:15,800 --> 01:04:19,800
And how have you dealt with the fear?

977
01:04:19,800 --> 01:04:27,800
You see, I always say fear, F E A R stands for false evidence appearing real.

978
01:04:27,800 --> 01:04:33,800
And excuse me, man, fear is something that everyone faces.

979
01:04:33,800 --> 01:04:42,800
Like even even when you started this initiative, David, I'm sure you felt some certain level of fear or doubt.

980
01:04:42,800 --> 01:05:00,800
And and to me, I always replace fear with faith because the reality is you fear this thing not working or you fear this thing not getting the results that you desire or you want to to get.

981
01:05:00,800 --> 01:05:10,800
And that fear hinders you. It's it's literally makes you not to be able to start, progress or continue with something.

982
01:05:10,800 --> 01:05:15,800
So I think I think to me, I replace fear with faith.

983
01:05:15,800 --> 01:05:19,800
And that's that's that's where my my my journey of faith comes in.

984
01:05:19,800 --> 01:05:28,800
Like, I know that this this this is not something that fear is not fear is not from God.

985
01:05:28,800 --> 01:05:30,800
I am a person who believes that.

986
01:05:30,800 --> 01:05:41,800
And if there is something that I need to do and I fear doing that particular thing, I always get reminded that you need to be strong and courageous.

987
01:05:41,800 --> 01:05:46,800
Well, it's funny you mentioned the fear doing the podcast since we haven't launched yet.

988
01:05:46,800 --> 01:05:48,800
There's still that little bit of fear.

989
01:05:48,800 --> 01:05:55,800
We're like when I first had the idea to bring it together, I was like, oh, I'm going to release it.

990
01:05:55,800 --> 01:05:56,800
Nobody's going to listen to it.

991
01:05:56,800 --> 01:05:57,800
Nobody's going to like it.

992
01:05:57,800 --> 01:05:59,800
People are going to hate on it, etc.

993
01:05:59,800 --> 01:06:05,800
But my strategy for getting around that is I'll film all the episodes first.

994
01:06:05,800 --> 01:06:07,800
Now everyone's waiting for it to release.

995
01:06:07,800 --> 01:06:08,800
I have to release it.

996
01:06:08,800 --> 01:06:09,800
I look at it.

997
01:06:09,800 --> 01:06:11,800
I would rather not look stupid.

998
01:06:11,800 --> 01:06:13,800
So face the fear.

999
01:06:13,800 --> 01:06:14,800
Right.

1000
01:06:14,800 --> 01:06:15,800
And you took faith, right?

1001
01:06:15,800 --> 01:06:16,800
Yeah.

1002
01:06:16,800 --> 01:06:17,800
You're like you took faith.

1003
01:06:17,800 --> 01:06:19,800
Let me tell you something else about fear, man.

1004
01:06:19,800 --> 01:06:26,800
Fear has made a lot of people procrastinate on something that they desire to become or they desire to do to a point where.

1005
01:06:26,800 --> 01:06:31,800
They have procrastinated so much to a point where they're like, I don't have to do it.

1006
01:06:31,800 --> 01:06:33,800
And that's how a dream died.

1007
01:06:33,800 --> 01:06:39,800
Have you like wanted to do something and you're like, I fear doing that particular thing.

1008
01:06:39,800 --> 01:06:44,800
And then days or years or time passes by, you look back, you're like, ah, it's not worth it anyway.

1009
01:06:44,800 --> 01:06:53,800
And you have no idea how big of a significance and how big of impact that thing would have brought if only you started.

1010
01:06:53,800 --> 01:06:58,800
And you say that and it reminded me of that.

1011
01:06:58,800 --> 01:07:01,800
Fear makes people to procrastinate.

1012
01:07:01,800 --> 01:07:08,800
And when you procrastinate, you don't see you kill that fire for you to do that thing that you wanted to do.

1013
01:07:08,800 --> 01:07:11,800
So fear is something that we have to face.

1014
01:07:11,800 --> 01:07:17,800
And often with the fear, I think the outcome is usually not as bad as what the fear tells you it will be.

1015
01:07:17,800 --> 01:07:21,800
A hundred percent, a hundred percent, David, a hundred percent.

1016
01:07:21,800 --> 01:07:23,800
Let me tell you something.

1017
01:07:23,800 --> 01:07:26,800
This podcast will surprise you.

1018
01:07:26,800 --> 01:07:29,800
And I'm not telling you to make you feel good.

1019
01:07:29,800 --> 01:07:32,800
I'm only telling you that.

1020
01:07:32,800 --> 01:07:42,800
What you're doing and the journey that you're taking is a journey that not only will change the lives of others, but it will also change your life.

1021
01:07:42,800 --> 01:07:46,800
So keep going, keep doing and keep showing up, man.

1022
01:07:46,800 --> 01:07:47,800
Keep showing up.

1023
01:07:47,800 --> 01:07:49,800
The world is your oyster.

1024
01:07:49,800 --> 01:07:51,800
Even if nobody watches it.

1025
01:07:51,800 --> 01:07:57,800
I will watch it and I will share it and make sure that people who follow me watch it as well.

1026
01:07:57,800 --> 01:08:00,800
Well, if they don't, that's what they will be aware of it.

1027
01:08:00,800 --> 01:08:04,800
Hold them at gunpoint, make them watch it.

1028
01:08:04,800 --> 01:08:05,800
Yep.

1029
01:08:05,800 --> 01:08:07,800
Whatever it takes.

1030
01:08:07,800 --> 01:08:11,800
Whatever it takes.

1031
01:08:11,800 --> 01:08:12,800
Yeah.

1032
01:08:12,800 --> 01:08:30,800
So one of the closing traditions we have on this podcast is that we'll ask the guest something that is maybe they're struggling with or that they're avoiding, that they're scared of, that would have an impact on their lives.

1033
01:08:30,800 --> 01:08:38,800
Something that could be done within a week or two weeks that would make their life easier, would make their life a little bit less stressful.

1034
01:08:38,800 --> 01:08:42,800
And then we ask them to challenge themselves in that way.

1035
01:08:42,800 --> 01:08:54,800
And so for you, the question is, what is a small thing that you could do within the next week, the next two weeks that would make your life a little bit better, make it a little bit easier, make it a little bit less stressful.

1036
01:08:54,800 --> 01:09:07,800
Yeah, I think, I think to me is being, being a person who

1037
01:09:07,800 --> 01:09:08,800
is not scared.

1038
01:09:08,800 --> 01:09:17,800
I think we talked about fear and courage and, and the reason as to why that was my answer is because I too feel scared to do some particular things.

1039
01:09:17,800 --> 01:09:40,800
And, and I think in the next two weeks or two, I have, I have really, really not taken advantage of some opportunities that are ahead of me or opportunities that are around me that I ought to have.

1040
01:09:40,800 --> 01:09:48,800
And, and, and, and one of them was, you know, I, somebody told me, man, you should put your content on TikTok.

1041
01:09:48,800 --> 01:09:51,800
And I was like, nah, nah, nah.

1042
01:09:51,800 --> 01:09:59,800
But that's, that's something that I'm looking forward to be doing in the next two weeks so that I can be able to reach more people and change more lives.

1043
01:09:59,800 --> 01:10:00,800
Okay.

1044
01:10:00,800 --> 01:10:11,800
And the next part of it is you give yourself a stick, something that will happen if you don't put your content on TikTok to give you that extra motivation.

1045
01:10:11,800 --> 01:10:21,800
A stick. So it could be something difficult. Maybe you do a cold plunge, maybe you go on a do a Murph workout.

1046
01:10:21,800 --> 01:10:30,800
Do a do three rounds of the ManiQ. You know, the 200 steps in Colorado Springs. Oh yeah.

1047
01:10:30,800 --> 01:10:37,800
That's tough, dude. Three rounds. Yeah. Okay. Three rounds. I hope I won't die.

1048
01:10:37,800 --> 01:10:48,800
That's the reason. That's the reason not to do it. So yeah, I did one and my challenge, my next challenge is to do two. So three is something that I don't want to do. So yeah.

1049
01:10:48,800 --> 01:10:54,800
That's perfect. So if you post your content on TikTok, you won't have to do three. Yeah. And you can keep me accountable.

1050
01:10:54,800 --> 01:10:58,800
I'll make sure you do it. Thank you.

1051
01:10:58,800 --> 01:11:05,800
But what can people expect from you, from your brand, from any more books? What can people expect in the future?

1052
01:11:05,800 --> 01:11:21,800
Yeah, 100 percent more books to come, more content to create, more coaching programs and yeah, more of lives being impacted and changed in a global scale. So yeah.

1053
01:11:21,800 --> 01:11:26,800
And where can people find what you're doing? Find more of your content, find your books.

1054
01:11:26,800 --> 01:11:36,800
Yeah, I have written two books. One is called Dear Youth for Young People and the other is called Protect Your Courage. So they are both on Amazon.

1055
01:11:36,800 --> 01:11:43,800
So if you search Dear Youth or Protect Your Courage by Charles Mselanga, you're going to find those books.

1056
01:11:43,800 --> 01:11:50,800
I'm also on social media like Facebook, Instagram, TikTok.

1057
01:11:50,800 --> 01:11:57,800
I opened it, by the way, it's just that I'm not as consistent as I should. YouTube.

1058
01:11:57,800 --> 01:12:05,800
So all of those handles Charles Mselanga and you can find me there. So that's where people can find me.

1059
01:12:05,800 --> 01:12:09,800
Awesome. Thank you. Thank you. Thanks for coming on the podcast. 100 percent. Great talking to you.

1060
01:12:09,800 --> 01:12:21,800
Thanks for having me, Ben. And I wish you the very best. Thank you. Yep.