The Great American Hiding Spot. 5, 4, 3, 2, 1,
0. Welcome to the show, people. Welcome to the
show. Eat my shorts. So here is to conversation.
Tranquility base here. The Eagle has landed.
Welcome to the Cash Exchange. Welcome. What's
up? Not much. I am in between jobs for one more
day. There was a little bit of a gap between
actually fully going into my training with a
new place. So I've had a couple of lazy days.
How's that been going? Those can either be really
productive or really unproductive. A little of
both. I've gotten all of my chores done, but
I also kind of feel like Ben Wyatt in Parks and
Rec when he's unemployed. And so he spends two
whole weeks making three seconds worth of stop
motion. Well, hey, I guess that's better than
what you could be doing. This is true. It's all
about silver linings. How have you been? I've
been pretty good. I just watched something I've
been meaning to watch for a while. The Fly Me
to the Moon with Scarlett Johansson and Channing
Tatum. How was that? It was interesting. Part
of me wanted it to go full bore into the whole
moon landing was faked and this is how they did
it. And they almost went there. They almost went
there. They went right up to the line. And then
they were like, ah, just kidding. They really
went to the moon and they really got the footage
from the moon. So much so that the third act,
the whole plot was that government comes in and
says, hey, we don't trust you to be able to pull
this off. So you have everything set here to
fake it. So as soon as we can switch the feeds,
then we're just going to do the fake thing. That's
what everyone's going to see. And then they're
like, oh, no, we can't do that. We finally have
a Scarlett Johansson. She's like, I finally have
a conscience now. And so. She goes to undo everything
that she did. And turns out that it was a good
thing that they were using the actual footage
because a cat came in and destroyed the fake
footage and like the shot, the fake shot that
they had. So it was just it was it was dumb.
And then there was a lot of like meta references
like she she had this this like really odd director.
And she's like, man, should have got Kubrick.
And then and then there's another part where
Woody Harrelson was in it, too. He was the big
CIA or the big government guy. And he said something
along the lines of if this is faked and people
find out, then NASA loses all credibility and
and all that stuff. And we can't have the people
thinking this was fake. It was just it was dumb.
It was dumb. And the whole. The whole way they
got around the, well, a whole bunch of people
work here. Someone's going to snitch. Someone's
going to say something. You can't keep everyone
quiet. Was the only people that were allowed
in the production were the director that Scarlett
Johansson hired. Scarlett Johansson, her assistant.
And then everyone else was going to be like FBI
Secret Service type people. Okay. Who? I definitely
have never, ever spilled the beans on anything
before. And then at one point, the director brings
in his own lighting guy and he just he just strolls
in. He's like, how'd you get in here? This is
top secret. And he's like, I just walked through
the front door. So all in all, it had a six point
six on IMDb. And that's probably about what I'd
give it if it had the balls to go there to actually
say, yeah, it was faked. And this is how they
would have done it. then I would have rated it
much higher, but they didn't. Think the director
would have gotten punched in the face by Buzz
Aldrin? I had no idea he was still alive. Emily
and I were talking about it, and I knew that
Neil Armstrong had died. I knew that Michael
Collins was dead, but I had no idea that Buzz
Aldrin was still around kicking it. Yeah. He
lives in Texas, right? Or was that Lance Armstrong?
Or Neil Armstrong? Wrong Armstrong. I did the
same thing. I did the same thing when we were
talking about it. I don't know. I have no clue.
I just know that he's a curmudgeon. Which I mean,
if people go around saying that your greatest,
the greatest accomplishment in your life was
all fake, then I can kind of see where he's coming
from. But still. Yeah. Or in the case that it
was faked, which I'm very much not saying that
it was, you've been defending this. narrative
for so long that I think at some point you got
to get especially feisty with it. I'm sure that
we're going to make a real statement. Having
to keep that secret. You know, I don't know what
I thought Fly Me to the Moon was about, but I
thought it was a rom -com, not an actual movie
about the moon landing. In a roundabout way.
I mean, it starts to attractive people, so they
obviously get together at the end. I imagined
it in more of a like. It's based on the Frank
Sinatra song and not the celestial body. Well,
what is Frank Sinatra talking about? What metaphorical
moon would he be referring to? You know, I don't
have an answer for that one, but I thought it
was a reference to the song which references
the celestial body, not a song about the thing
or a movie about the thing directly. It does
get a lot of airplay. And the song. And it's
over the end credits. So. But it's not the Frank
Sinatra version. It's a female singing it. Okay.
I have never actually been able to listen to
Sinatra. And I blame Olive Garden for it. Because
their entire. Like soundtrack at Olive Garden.
Is just bad covers of. It's Amore. Sinatra music.
Well it's not even It's Amore. It's the. If you've
heard how many times they've played. Like Fly
Me to the Moon or My Way and stuff like that.
It sounds like a discount version of either Frank
Sinatra or Michael Bublé. It wears on you. There
is something. There is a country. I want to say
it's like Malaysia, Taiwan, Vietnam. I don't
know. Somewhere in that area. Where there is
some sort of reputation associated with the song
My Way. And it's gotten people killed before.
Okay. I think it was a Mr. Ballin story. Dude
sang it at karaoke and then was immediately taken
out. You should look into it. You should look
into it. It's full of intrigue. Oh, boy. It was
hard to come up with a... Pick one of our topics
for this episode. Okay. I don't know if you've
kept up lately. There's a lot of stuff going
on in the world. There is too much stuff going
on in the world. I re -downloaded TikTok because
I wanted to look for something specific. And
I am going to uninstall it again tonight. Oh,
my God. That was intense. Just learn some self
-control. Yeah, that is why I uninstall it. You're
hot and cold. You're yes and you're no. Speaking
of astronauts. The headlines have been absolute
insanity this week. Yeah. Housekeeping from a
former episode. Did you see that she find all
that stuff went to trial? And it turns out that
the house was actually bought in Orlando Bloom's
name. I didn't know that. He owns the corporation
that's named after their daughter that actually
bought the house. Huh. So this is getting muddy.
If I were him, I would throw her under the bus
so hard. They're not together anymore. Are they
divorced now? Okay. I was about to say I knew
they were separated, but I didn't know if they
were actually. No, I think it's FBO. I think
it's Facebook official. Oh, not not in its complicated
situation anymore. Unfortunate. Oh, my God. What
a such a pick me thing to put on your Facebook.
Silly. All right. You ready for these three?
The three things. The three. Yeah, completely.
unrelated to any news story that is happening
right now things. I don't like this lead in,
but what do you got for me? All right. You got
pyramids. You got the Eiffel Tower. You got online
dating. I'm going to need you to pick three different
things. Oh, my God. The pyramids. Yes. The Eiffel
Tower. Yes. Online dating. Yes, ma 'am. My first
thought was things that are smaller in person.
I feel like the thing about online dating is
men are notoriously like, I'm 6 '2". And they
show up and they're short kings. There's no shame
in being 5 '4". But you can't be mad that somebody
is upset. that you claimed you were 10 inches
taller than you actually are. But what if you
live your entire life with platform shoes on?
The Tom Cruise defense. And you don't know a
life where you aren't 6 '2 because you have 8
-inch lifts. What about that? How do 8 -inch
lifts? How do you go about your day -to -day
life with that? Yeah. How do you do that? You
can't drive a car. Practice. Why not? I don't
think that angle makes any kind of sense. If
me being 6 '1 can drive a car, why can't someone
who has that extra length just at the end of
their shoe drive a car? Are your feet eight inches
thick? No, but it's funny you mention that because
you know what is. What? My heart. That feels
too thick. His heart grew three sizes that day.
And he immediately had to go to the ER. He died,
actually. Quite unfortunate. Also, one last thing.
Would you be showering or bathing in these platform
shoes? Do you not Do you not take them off and
accept your real height when you're trying to
get clean? I imagine it being like a Tobias Funke
situation. So instead of a never nude, he's a
never short. Huh. Okay. So he is devised a way
in order to live this life despite his shortcomings.
Boo! Okay. But you are on the right track with
online dating. You just have to find a way to
weave in the other two. So it is about lying
on your dating profile? Yes. I mean, the way
I have it tied in, it's more of a broader thing.
But essentially, when you boil it down, that
is, yeah, it's lying on a dating profile. Okay.
Online dating. The Eiffel Tower and the... Can
I get a hint? Is there a fourth one that you
were maybe waffling between? Yeah, but it would
have given it away. I could tweak it a little
bit and say, tell you Bernie. So if you had four
things, it would be pyramids, Eiffel Towers,
online dating, Bernie. That makes me feel like
it's an old thing. I mean. My fun fact for this
episode is a very old fact. But maybe if you,
instead of thinking of the pyramid as like a
three -dimensional shape, just take 2D, a 2D
pyramid. You mean a triangle? Which is a triangle.
Yes. Pyramid made it sound more mysterious. Is
this an Illuminati episode? Eiffel Tower. No,
no, we're not there yet. We're not cancel proof
yet. Damn it. Is anyone canceled proof? Okay.
So Ernie. There's your bonus. Yeah. In 2D. So.
Yeah, I don't know. Okay. Well, since you're
thrown in the towel. Schemes and scams. Pyramid
schemes. The Eiffel Tower. Being sold twice.
Online dating. Bernie Madoff, not Sanders. Yes.
See, if I had said Madoff, you would have known
what I was talking about. Yep. There we go. All
right. So schemes and scams. Schemes and scams.
All right. Do you know what is most accepted
as the first scam? That has ever been written
in history enough to where present day people
would be able to recount what happened. I mean,
I feel like you could maybe go like the snake
oil salesman route where there was just traveling
shows of nonsense fixals. Yeah. Yeah. You can
go back even farther than that. People trying
to sell. Like the Brooklyn Bridge and all of
that kind of stuff? Well, this actually took
place in 300 B .C. Oh, I'm not going nearly far
enough back. Okay. And it was two fellows named
Hegastratos and Xenostimus. Okay. And they had
a ship. The ship carried cargo from one place
to the other. They were based out of Greece.
They took out what equates to a loan to finance
the trip with the ship as collateral. And so
how it would work is that you would be at your
port city. You'd say, hey, I need the money for
this trip. They'd say, okay, we will give you
this amount of money. You pay us this plus interest
upon whenever you're expected to arrive there.
And we're square. What these fellas did is they
took the bottomry, is what they're called, and
went on their merry way, started sailing out,
and almost immediately decided to, you know what
we're going to do? We're just going to sink this
bitch. We're going to take the money and run.
In the process of trying to sink their boat,
they were caught. And Hegestratos drowned trying
to escape. And the other one got caught. And
there was no record of what happened to him afterwards.
But I'm sure it was not good. Would not imagine.
But that is one of the first instances in written
history of someone trying to pull a scam. And
it was an insurance scam. Huh. That is... I would
not have guessed that. Yeah. I wouldn't either
until I started researching this. I'm just curious
how far back our flawed human senses have been
around. And now we know it's at least 300 BC.
Learn something new every day. So when you think
of a scam, a scheme, what do you think of? What's
the first thing that comes to mind? I think of
pyramid schemes in the Amway. Kind of way. Cutco.
Or the Mary Kay. Yeah, Cutco. Tupperware. What's
the one with like the vitamins and stuff? I went
to school with a girl who was a sales rep for
them and I don't remember. Pyramid schemes, they
can be really dressed up to where you don't realize
it's a pyramid scheme until you're well in it.
Yeah. But I will also. say in pyramid schemes
defense is you get to reconnect with friends
you haven't heard from in 20 years when they
reach out to you on facebook and say hey girl
uh how's it going it's been a while have you
heard about yeah yeah and for the record my notes
start out as with hey girl because i don't have
a facebook that's disappointing so oh but they
would start out with hey girl if you did have
a facebook It's more of a method of contacting
you than a using the wrong gender here? Maybe.
I don't know. I don't know. It's not worth getting
a Facebook to find out. I can tell you that much.
That is an absolute fact. I've already did a
soft ban on TikTok recently. Yeah? Yeah. Given
all the craziness, it makes sense. Spent a lot
more time on Twitter on X, though, which definitely
is not a good trade -off. Because people are
a lot more opinionated on X than they are on
TikTok. But, you know, it is what it is. So,
grandfather of the modern day pyramid scheme.
I don't know if pyramid schemes and Ponzi schemes
are really... Like they have a lot of similarities,
but I don't know if they're enough to be the
same thing. Can you explain to me what a Ponzi
scheme is? Because I don't know that I know the
difference. I can tell you. I always thought
they were kind of interchangeable. I can tell
you all about Charles Ponzi. He was an Italian
immigrant who became infamous in the 1920s for
inventing the high yield investment fraud that
now bears his name. It is pretty cool that it's
named after him. It is. His scam based on the
supposed purchase of international postal reply
coupons, which I think were like stamps, something
like or like bonds, maybe. OK. I couldn't really
get it was it was above my financial literacy
ability. And promised investors returns of. Around
50 % in 45 days. Today, if someone offers you
a 50 % increase in any investment that you make
in a short amount of time, in really any amount
of time, if they say, I can tell you that you
give me $100, give me a month and a half, boom,
you got $150 now. That's a scam. Do not give
them your money. Say, hey, here you go. Let's
test it out. Oh, my God, it worked. Here's my
life savings. Don't do that. OK. There's a little
cash exchange PSA. Sure. A CEPSA. But what made
it what we know of now as a Ponzi scheme is that
he would be robbing Peter to pay Paul. You know
what that phrase means? Yeah. So he would get
his initial investors. They would give him X
amount of dollars. And then he would say, OK,
I will give you this return at this in this amount
of time. And so what he does is he will take
that money and go find new people and say, hey,
I will give you X amount of dollars return in
your investment in this amount of days. They
give him money. He pays off the first guy. And
then he just keeps going and going down the line.
So the people at the beginning get their money
and then word of mouth spreads. And then they're
like, hey, this guy is great. He's a genius.
He knows exactly what he's doing. And so it just
spreads like wildfire through all these people.
And this was the 1920s. So you got world wars
in there. You got Great Depression. You got everything
going on. People were strapped for cash. So the
little bit of money they had, they were given
to this guy because they had learned, they had
been told by people that they trusted that this
works, this system works, whatever he's doing,
it's like magic. That is deeply depressing. Yeah.
And it only lasted eight months. He made, at
the time, the 1920s, he was making millions of
dollars a week. And just dollars like actual
millions of dollars by that standard or by standards
by by their standards, millions of dollars a
week. So now unbelievable amounts of money and
had no shame in hiding it. If people came came
a knocking, then he would just ignore it. And
eventually they would just give up. But then
it got so much that. People, whenever word spread
that, hey, something's not right here, all these
people started coming in and demanding their
money back. And then he ended up getting arrested.
He got charged with multiple counts of mail fraud
and served 10 years in prison. And then he was
deported to Italy. Afterwards, he attempted to
he came back into the U .S. He tried to start
another Ponzi scheme in Florida. And he was caught.
And then he got deported back to Italy again
and then moved down to Brazil and died with nothing
to his name in 1949. Charles Ponzi, the namesake
for the Ponzi scheme. That is a fun little bit
of trivia. So we talked about Charles Ponzi.
Now we talk about the one who brought Ponzi schemes
into the 21st, 20th, 21st century. 20th, right?
No, 21st. I don't really know how long ago. It
was both. It was both because, I mean, he'd been
doing it for a long, long, long time. That man
is Bernie Madoff, who just recently died in prison,
I want to say two years ago. I don't remember.
It wasn't that long ago. That's a lot more recent
than I thought. I'm pretty sure. I can double
check. Unlike Buzz Aldrin, I know that he's dead.
2021, four years ago. Unlike Buzz Aldrin, you
know that he's dead? I know that Bernie Madoff
is dead. Do we not know that Buzz Aldrin is alive?
Oh, you do. No, we do. Yes. Yes, I knew that
Bernie Madoff had died. I thought that Buzz Aldrin
was dead. Buzz Aldrin is still alive. Bernie
Madoff is still, in fact, dead. He Bernie Madoff
honestly put Charles Ponzi's the namesake of
the Ponzi scheme to shame with his shenanigans.
He was touted as like one of the greatest investors
of all time and like very like people you would
be surprised names that you definitely know gave.
this man so much money and couldn't see the writing
on the wall that something ain't jiving. Can
you give me an example in that? The names that
I would recognize? Because I don't know a ton
about the Enron situation. I know it was a massive
scandal that blew up. Enron is different from
Bernie Madoff. Was it? Uh -huh. Yeah, I got Enron
in here later. Spoiler alert. I always equated
the two things. Yeah, I mean, they both were
around the same time. Okay. Some of the more
famous ones. Zsa Zsa Gabor. Okay. Steven Spielberg's,
one of his foundations. Kevin Bacon and Keira
Sedgwick. Okay. Larry King. John Malkovich. Jeffrey
Katzenberg. Of DreamWorks fame? I don't know.
Oh, okay. Never mind. Yeah, him and Steven Spielberg
started DreamWorks. I didn't know that Spielberg
started DreamWorks. Mm -hmm. Yeah, I think that
Jeffrey Katzenberg had something to do with Disney,
and he had some ideas, and they were like, yeah,
no, we're good. And then he just was like, okay,
see ya, and then went and started a competing
animation studio. That's why one of their OG
movies, the one that they're definitely most
known for is just one big screw you to Disney.
Yeah, sure. Yeah. So, yeah, I mean, that's just
a taste of the list. But, I mean, there were
anyone could contact, get in contact with them
and could be set up and all of a sudden. promises
are made for the upper echelon people promises
were kept for a little while and then uh yeah
then it all fell apart because that's the thing
ponzi schemes eventually you run out of people
that you can get the money from and then it just
you don't you can't pay the earlier people and
then it just all collapses on itself i feel like
i remember seeing something A while ago that
said that you would only be able to do like 13
rounds or something incredibly small worth of
a pyramid scheme before it just took over the
entire population of the world. Yeah, I mean,
he kept this going for decades and it wasn't
until December 2008. The authorities stepped
in and and really took a look at everything.
The reason it was in December of 2008 is because
that's when the 2008 financial crisis happened.
And then all of a sudden, everyone was real concerned
with where their money was going, really balancing
their checkbooks over and over to make sure there
wasn't any bleed out because no one was having
a good time then, especially financially. He
ends up going to trial, gets found guilty. You
want to guess what his sentence was? What? 150
years. Wow. That's actually pretty impressive
for a crime of that nature. Usually those people
get let off very easy. It's estimated that he
swindled around $65 billion from people. And
I mean, even for Charles Ponzi making millions
a week in the 1920s, that's nothing compared
to making 65 billion dollars now. That is incredible.
How long did he how long was the scheme running?
Decades. I didn't get the first one that they
were able to to pin to him, but it was definitely
it was decades, probably starting in mid 70s,
80s. Oh, it goes back all the way to 2008. I
think so. That is completely horrific and incredible.
Not in a good way, obviously, but that's to get
away with it for that long. Yeah, that's pretty.
It's something. There's a Carl Shapiro listed
on here. I've seen if he was related to Benjamin.
I don't think he is. That's a fairly common last
name. Yeah. But again, it everyone 2008 hit.
Everyone came a knock and saying, hey, I need
my money back because, you know, I lost my job
or I had to foreclose on my house. And if you
haven't, make sure you check out the big short
fantastic movie about the entire 2008 housing
market crash. And then when they realized that,
hey, there was no money. to take, then that's
when the authorities got involved. And just like,
uh, just like our friend Charlie, uh, ended up
getting the book thrown at him. For the first
time, there was not money in the banana stand.
Nope. Cause it was given to, uh, the other, the
first banana stand. And then you're going to
get the third banana stands money. And so on
and so forth. Sounds like a good idea to me.
Yeah, well, give it a shot. Give it a shot. If
Ponzi could make it eight months, Bernie could
make it decades, shoot for a century. I mean,
I don't know that I've got a century left to
play with. Anyways, what do you know about the
Eiffel Tower? Can you give me three fun facts?
Okay. I know nothing about the Eiffel Tower.
Which imitator do you think is better? The one
in Vegas or the one in Paris, Texas with the
cowboy hat on it? I mean, my heart has to go
to the Texan one, but I stayed in the Eiffel
Tower in Vegas. It was... It was fine. It was
it was a decent hotel for being on the strip.
Yeah. Middle child. We were talking about she
saw a giant antenna and she said, that's the
Eiffel Tower of Texas. I was like, no, no, it's
not because we have an actual Eiffel Tower. What?
We have to go see it. And then she said and I
said, yeah, we can go see it. Maybe sometime.
And she was like, unless there's nothing else
to do there, if it's just the Eiffel Tower, then
we don't need to go. And I said, it's just the
Eiffel Tower. There's nothing else to do in Paris,
Texas. Oh. Okay, never mind then. I said, but
we could see it like passing through, going somewhere
else. Yeah. I think you should instill a knowledge
of Route 66 in your middle child. Because she
could, with her love of the biggest ball of twine
in Minnesota, she could very easily turn that
passion into wanting to see the world's largest
catsup bottle, which is in somewhere that I was
recently. I think. I feel like I... Next time
we go to Albuquerque, we're going to stop at
the world's largest pistachio. I'm sorry, what?
That's the world's largest pistachio. It's not
in Las Vegas, New Mexico, but it's somewhere
in that area. Las Cruces? Is there a Las Vegas,
New Mexico? There is, yeah. Also, yeah, the largest
bottle of cats up in Collinsville, Illinois.
I am a sucker for a roadside attraction. Me too.
They're just nonsense. And I think it is one
of the coolest things about humanity. Alamogordo.
Nah, I should have known that. It's an Alamogordo.
Alamogordo. Okay. And if you head west from here,
heading towards the ABQ, you're going to be stopping
through Alamogordo and you can stop and see the
world's largest pistachio. Is this a naturally
occurring pistachio? Was it a... Is it a memorialization?
Is it the largest statue of a pistachio? What
are we talking about? It is as natural as plaster
can be. That's disappointing. I was really hoping
this was one of those largest pumpkin situations,
but maybe they cast it in resin so it didn't
get gross over time. Can you imagine how hard
it would be to open the world's largest pistachio?
It'd be like Fort Knox. Would it be harder or
easier to open the world's largest pistachio?
Have you tried to open a regular -sized pistachio
without tools? You use tools for your pistachios?
What tools would you use for a pistachio? Like
a nutcracker. You use a nutcracker on pistachios?
The pistachios you buy are pre -opened. I don't
buy the pre -opened ones. They're more expensive.
Oh, my God. This place is called Pistachio Land.
We're taking a road trip. This is so silly. I
didn't know they grew on trees. I don't know
how I thought pistachios grew, but this wasn't
it. This is a pistachio orchard. I'm learning
all kinds of stuff today. Well, yeah, that's
what makes it a nut. That's why peanuts aren't
nuts. They're beans. Because they come from the
ground. Why do we call them peanuts? They're
legumes. I don't know. I don't know. Why do we
call a strawberry a strawberry when it's not
a berry? Why isn't a banana called a banana berry
when it is a berry? That's a good point. I don't
know. I didn't make these crazy rules. I just
have to follow them. I believe that pistachios
should be a... bush. They should grow on bushes.
That's how that makes sense to me. What is a
bush but not just a series of little tiny trees
clumped together? There's your wisdom for that.
It's a tree without its platform boots. There
you go. If a bush had an online dating profile.
And it didn't disclose that. That would be a
scheme and a scam. And we are back. And we're
back. Victor Lustig was a man who managed to
successfully sell the Eiffel Tower one time.
And it worked in an attempt to sell the Eiffel
Tower a second time. And it did not pan out the
second time. So what he did. was he posed as
a government official that was the person in
charge of getting rid of the Eiffel Tower. And
I've heard before, I don't know how true it is,
but most Parisians don't like the Eiffel Tower.
Because it attracts all the tourists? I think
that's part of it. And they're stuck up snooty
French people. But also because they just think
that it is. I mean, it's a metal structure. That's
all it is. I don't think it's as foo -foo as
most French would prefer it to be. Maybe they
should put a little beret on top of it. Spice
it up. French it up. Yeah. Maybe. Maybe take
a few pointers from the good old U .S. of A.
and just dress it up a little bit. Maybe you'll
find a new appreciation for it. Yeah. Build a
baguette to scale. Yeah. Just give it a paper
sack on the side that has a baguette sticking
out of it. See, I think that one is American.
But if it doesn't have the paper bag, it's French.
Oh, OK. I don't know the last time I bought a
baguette, but, you know, you got to you got to
make a show every time you buy one. You do. I
mean, they're unwieldy. I was making spaghetti
and meatballs here and we were going to have
garlic bread, but we didn't have any garlic bread.
So I ran to Aldi and got a baguette. And for
whatever reason, it was like, I don't know, maybe
like. The diameter of it was like two inches,
but it was like two and a half feet long. And
so you got to buy a breadstick. I mean, it was
it was bread. It was a baguette, but it was just
extremely it was it was odd shaped. And at Aldi,
you have to pay for a cart. You pay for bags.
I was just running in. I was getting one thing.
And so I just went up. Got it, paid for it, and
just walk out with this floppy baguette back
to my truck. And it felt real strange. But, you
know, I brought it home and made some fantastic
garlic bread with it. So it is what it is. But,
yeah, I mean, I guess what I'm trying to say
is that baguettes come in all shapes and sizes.
And that just doesn't conform to your idea of
what a baguette should be. Doesn't make it any
less of a baguette. You lost me in that story
at you needing both to put a quarter in the little
cart rental thingy. And also you needed a bag.
You had to pay for a bag to take home one two
foot long. I didn't pay for a bag and I didn't
get a cart. I'm saying, no, I'm saying if you've
been to Aldi, then you know that you have to
do that. I was getting one thing. But you didn't
have to do that. I didn't do that. No. But I
could have concealed my purchase better if I
had. I didn't have to walk out of the store.
I didn't have to walk out the store. Just my
floppy baguette just flapping all around, trying
to get back to the truck so I could get home.
I could have concealed it better, but it made
no sense. And so I didn't. And if people want
to judge me for that, then that's on them. That's
not me. I'm cool as a cucumber. You say whatever
you want to say. Won't bother me none. Because
I still came home and made some. Some great garlic
bread. So back on the Eiffel Tower. Yes, back
on the Eiffel Tower. He posed as a government
official that was in charge of dismantling the
Eiffel Tower and selling it for scrap metal because
they were done with it. And so what he did was
he gathered up some local scrap metal people
so that he could explain everything to them and
get a bid on it. on how much they would pay for
the scrap metal from the Eiffel Tower. Most of
the, and he did it upright. He met them in a
fancy hotel and laid it all out for them. Almost
everybody saw right through it. Like, nah, we're
good. No, we, no, we, we here. Is no, no in French
too? I think so, but it's N -O -N. Non? Non?
I'm pretty sure, yeah. Anyways, they didn't say
we. They said the opposite of we, whatever that
is. Is what they told Victor. Except for one.
One gentleman. A man by the name of Andre Poisson.
Huh. You think there's any relation? Yes. Oh,
okay. Let's hope so. I think there's relation.
Let's hope this is their claim to fame. And another
very smart thing he did. was that he told all
these scrap metal people, hey, we got to keep
this on the down low. All right. They want to
get rid of it because the costs to upkeep it
are just through the roof. So they just want
to get rid of it. But we know there's going to
be a public outcry. People are going to be pissed.
So we got to keep it quiet. All right. Until
the deal's done. And then we can say, hey, you
know, there's nothing we can do. It's already
been signed. Contract's been signed. It's out
of our hands. That is a smart way to go about
it. And Poisson was his only bite when he threw
out his hook for the scam. But he still had his
reservations. He still thought something seemed
a little hinky. And so what Victor did was he
said, hey, you know, being a public servant,
it's not great money. And I have this great deal
for you. But, you know, I also have these other
takers. So what can we do? Hmm. How can we make
this deal work for everyone? How about Mr. Poisson?
You just you slip me. You slip me 70 ,000 francs
to let me know you're serious. You let me know
you're serious because, you know, I mean, it's
a public servant. It's rough out here. I'm just
I'm doing the duty for my people. But I could
use a little persuasion on getting everything
in order. Making sure that you can make this
as profitable for yourself as possible. And so
that sold him. That sold Poisson. He was like,
oh, okay. He's asking for a bribe. This must
be legit. And so he gives Victor the $70 ,000.
And he then paid for the fictitious contract
with proper, like, like on the right stationery,
forged stationery, but it looked legit enough
for Poisson to sign off on it and ended up selling
it, selling the scrap to Poisson for a total
of 1 .2 million francs, which today is worth
5 .3 million. So that's pretty sweet payday to
sell something that you don't own and then just
wash your hands of it. So he got the five. or
the $1 .2 million plus the $70 ,000 that he got
in the bribe, and he made it like a bandit. But
then whenever Poisson caught on to the fact that
he did not, in fact, buy the Eiffel Tower to
be scrap metal, he was too embarrassed that he
got so hoodwinked, so bamboozled, that he just
didn't say anything. I wish that I could lose
1 .2 million whatevers in a deal. And my embarrassment
of it is so severe that I can just wash my hands
of that 1 .2 and say, you know what? I learned
a lesson. I'm going to go on about my life. Yeah.
I mean, he's on the record now. We know that
he's a big old dum -dum. That he bought the Eiffel
Tower. To use for scrap metal. And then to walk
around, to walk around Paris and for it to not
even in Paris, it's a worldwide symbol to see
it everywhere. You go, you're walking down the
street and you see a little toddler that has
a onesie on that says Paris with a picture of
the Eiffel Tower on it. And that's just always
a reminder of what an idiot you were. That is
the worst thing. To have as a reminder of your
complete stupidity is the Eiffel Tower because
it is literally everywhere. There is not a more
French symbol. It's the beret, the baguette,
and the Eiffel Tower. Oh. And so Victor kept
an eye on the newspapers because he knew the
gig was up. He knew that he had been... He knew
that Poisson knew what was going on, but nothing
was ever in the papers. And so he figured that
if nothing was here now, then he's not going
to say anything. So I could just do this again.
And so a little while later, he attempts it again.
Except this time, the person that he approaches
about the sale is not a complete moron and goes
to the authorities and Victor goes on the run.
Came to the great U S of a, why not? Why not?
Why not? Just, uh, 19 before 1947, 1930. I mean,
that's like Ellis Island time, right? Just hop
on a ship, go to Ellis Island. Go from Victor
Lustig to Frank. Smith. And then you're good.
You're good to go. But if only, if only he had
left his criminal ways behind him in France.
But he didn't. He eventually ended up being imprisoned
at the Rock. Yeah. In the Bay. Good old Alcatraz.
And he ended up dying there in 1947. What was
he imprisoned for? Didn't say schemes got him.
Oh, I didn't say. Yeah. Yeah. I just I didn't
dive that deep into it. Probably should. I would
be curious what moment I think that Poisson realized
that he'd been had. Did he like did he drive
up to the Eiffel Tower with just like the collection
trucks and a staff and a couple torches? Like,
yeah, what was the process here? She's a man.
Oh, that was more Mario. I don't know if I could
do French on the spot. A lot of phlegm. Very
phlegmy people. It is a very phlegmy language,
that's for sure. Oh. All right. So how do you
feel about our Wall of Infamy? Who's your favorite?
The OG? The OG. Bonzi? Bernie? Because he was
so good at it? Or Victor Lustig because he was
just so brazen. They all have their qualities.
I mean, there's something to be said about the
first. in recorded history to have done it, but
I think I've got to go with Victor Lustig because
to sell the Eiffel Tower successfully at least
once is pretty incredible. That's a good choice.
Honestly, I would pick him too because he picked
the perfect mark because even when he found out
what was going on, He was too embarrassed to
say anything. 1 .2 million francs slide. Yeah.
To save his ego. He nailed it. So, yeah, I definitely
think that he's probably the best of all of them.
All right. You ready to shift a little bit to
companies who were schemers and scammers? This
first entry I have. I was a little hesitant.
I was going to put it in the part before, but
there was actually two people that took a majority
of the blame for what happened. But everyone
knows about the one. And that is Elizabeth Holmes
of Theranos. You know anything about Theranos?
I. The extent of my knowledge about Elizabeth
Holmes is. Unfortunately, through. The dropout
on Hulu, a show that I have not watched, which
would be very helpful, I feel like in this situation
and. Unfortunately, a new episode of Family Guy.
Which parodies that and the bear. And then like.
They did an HBO episode and a Hulu episode. Hulu's
was Only Murders in the Building, The Bear, and
The Dropout. Gotcha. Yeah. If you watch some
of the stuff whenever Elizabeth Holmes was peddling
the Edison machine, which was the flagship product
of Theranos, she just... Comes across as. Crazy.
She's always wide eyed. Like her eyes. She's
like. Just staring into your soul. The entire
time she's talking to you. She. Stole the. She
always looked like. She just. Went to Steve Jobs.
As a state sale. And bought all of his turtlenecks.
It's a marker of success. And then whenever she
would talk, it would be. Yes. Oh, Theranos. We.
And just it's a very fake put on. Trying to act
like she's high academic voice. And just everything
about her was so silly. She was like her own
caricature trying to sell this product to these.
And the Edison product, the thing that she touted
it would do was that it would take a drop of
blood or a small amount. I don't know if it was
exactly like a drop, but in like a the diabetes
test tester things. So like that. And then all
of a sudden it could churn out this huge panel
of everything that's wrong with you on which.
That would be like a miracle thing if that had
actually existed. Spoiler alert, it did not.
It's disappointing. There was some very creative
ways to mislead the investors that were giving
Theranos money for this world changing invention.
A lot of it revolved around they would take the
samples that they got. From the Edison and then
they would have to ship those out to actual blood
labs to test them and then they would then come
back with the results and say, yeah, here you
go. Totally came from Edison. On on like their
own stationary so that it all looked legit and
just mind boggling. And her defense was that
it would she just needed to fake it till you
make it. She needed to string them along long
enough to where they could actually get a functioning
device and then it would be like a real thing.
But they couldn't get it without the investors,
which I think that if there was enough. If she
had been able to show enough promise for it,
I think that there is enough angel investors
out there that she could have had plenty of money
for it. There's so much money that's dumped into.
that she definitely could have found the money.
And whenever there was a functional product available,
those people would have made their money back
tenfold. Not for nothing, but how much of the
success of a scam is based on the effectiveness
in which you can recreate stationery? It's pretty
crazy. Another person that was going to make
the list for... The previous section of individuals
would have been Frank Abagnale Jr., the one that
they made Catch Me If You Can about with Leonardo
DiCaprio. They really did him a solid by casting
Leonardo DiCaprio in his role because he was
nowhere near, to my eyes, as charming and as
handsome as Leonardo DiCaprio is in that movie.
It probably also... that he was like a consultant
on the movie and was also in the movie. So I'm
going to get Leo for this at the end. He's one
of the cops that gets him at the end and sends
him to prison. I actually own that on DVD now.
It's one of my few discs. That's a good one.
That's a good one. It's a good throwback. That
was one of the good things about Fly Me to the
Moon. It's that it had like all 60s aesthetics
in it. So that's one kudos I can give to it.
At one point, Theranos was evaluated at $9 billion.
So they had the money flowing in. But all that
money and valuation was based on lies that were
being told about a technology that didn't exist.
And so fraud. Fraud in, like, the most literal
definition possible. What is the timeline on
the Theranos, like, in this particular story?
What years are we talking? Like, from start to,
let's see. I do know that it ended in 2018 is
when it was shut down. Okay. It was founded in
2003. dissolved and liquidated. Founder convicted
in January of 2022 of wire fraud and conspiracy
and sentenced to 11 and a quarter years in prison.
I wonder how they worked out the three months
that you would also get on top of your 11 years.
Yeah, I don't know. But from the beginning, it
was about the blood testing. Worked on, I mean,
it was real pie -in -the -sky stuff, like a computer
chip that would be used to do, not nearly as
much as what she promised the Edison could do,
but along those same lines. And when she started
it, I think she had good intentions for that.
She also started it with a trust from her parents.
So, came from money and then... ran out of that
money or wanted more money or, I don't know,
really fell into the Steve Jobs cosplay and just
decided you weren't anything if you didn't have
a company valued at $9 billion. I don't know,
but I think she started with good intentions
and it just got away from her. I can see that.
Yeah, definitely has crazy eyes, so not someone
that you should give your money to. She's definitely
got Amanda's safety, nailed it. She in 2012,
they started they had a partnership with Safeway
Pharmacies where they would do like in store
blood testing. And so that that helped them gain
some legitimacy. Yeah. Yeah. Even though even
all that was just BS, that was all bull and nothing
ever actually came to fruition with that. And.
Then a year later, even after the Safeway stuff
wasn't doing anything, Walgreens got in on it
too, which I think was a case of FOMO more than
anything else. Sure. So they'd be willing to
throw money at it even if it didn't work out
just so no one else could have it and they didn't.
Are they owned by the same people? Are they?
I have no clue. Maybe it's like Safeway and Rite
Aid. There's a couple of them that are like big
chains that are actually connected. Maybe. Yeah,
on this one, she wasn't just falsifying Theranos
papers. She was also falsifying papers that supposedly
came from places like Pfizer and like huge pharmaceutical
companies to bolster her lies about the success
of the Edison. She had also convinced people
that her invention was. currently being used
in the military. I mean, she went full bore.
The whistleblower stated that Elizabeth and the
chief operating officer, Ramesh Sunny Balwani,
were very secretive about everything. There were
not even veiled threats of, if you say anything
outside of this company, it will be terrible
for you. And so, I mean, that doesn't that doesn't
seem like something a reputable company would
do to outright say, hey, shut up or else. Is
that not? I assume that is actually how most
large, actually successful companies work. Maybe
put in more professional terms, but. From everything
I've seen, it was it was it was out in the open.
Yeah. Like, don't say a fucking word. I swear
to God. Kind of like, you know, you know how
Ron Swanson had that Claymore on his desk? Kind
of like that. Like, hey, say something. Maybe
maybe this gets put in front of your door. I
don't know. I don't know. Maybe. Maybe. Yeah.
So she got 11 and a quarter years and Ramesh,
who was completely complicit in all of it, ended
up getting 12 felony counts of fraud and conspiracy.
and was also sentenced to roughly the same amount
of time in prison. You'd think that $9 billion
worth of fraud would carry a little higher of
a sentence than 11 years and three months. You'd
think so. But then you also have Bernie Madoff,
who, I mean, grand scheme of things, $65 billion
versus the $9 billion. He got 150 years. So,
I don't know. I don't know. I don't think I understand
anything about the prosecution for white -collar
crimes. Prosecution for any crimes. Yeah. I don't
really understand how those timelines shake out.
It's all over the place. Yeah. And then there's
also, oh, well, he's getting life in prison with
the possibility of parole in 25 years. Okay.
So, like, I understand that you may not be granted
parole, but then that's not really life. If you
have the opportunity, you're just here until
they say that you're not here anymore. Yeah.
So I don't know. Maybe maybe we come up with
a different term instead of life. I have legitimately
never understood what a life sentence is. I don't
feel like it's a standard unit. I don't feel
like I've ever heard it in the same number. So
like what what is a life sentence? I couldn't
tell you. A life sentence in other countries
can be like 15 years, 10 years. They say he got
life, so he'll be in there for at least 12 years.
Okay, that doesn't seem like life to me, but
I don't know. I'm going to add that as our not
so fun fact for the next episode. What exactly
constitutes a life sentence? Is American sentencing
procedures? Just that one specific thing I get.
too deep in the weeds, it's going to make everybody
sad. Do you know anything about Dieselgate? Dieselgate?
No. This is the least informed I have ever been
for one of our episodes. I'm just here for moral
support. What about the people's car? People's
car? Yeah. The Volkswagen. And Dieselgate. Okay.
Okay. That's fine. That's fine. That's fine.
That's fine. Because I got everything you need
right here. In 2015, the Volkswagen company was
approached because they were confronted with
evidence that there, I believe it was the Jettas.
It was a sedan that ran on diesel. The emissions
that were actually coming out of the car were
completely different than what the computer was
saying the emissions coming out of the car were.
I do remember this one. So every company or every
country has their own rules for how much emissions
a car is allowed to release. And there's all
kinds of different factors in it. There's all
kinds of stuff. For the most part, it's, hey,
you can't have something that's just blowing
black smoke out all day. So you got to rein it
in. You got to figure out what you need to do
for your engines. You need to figure out if you
need death. You need to figure out if you need
different catalytic converters or what you got
to do to fix it, to make sure all that stuff
isn't going up, blowing a hole in the ozone,
going to burn us all up to death. All right.
Well. The discrepancy between what the computers
of these cars were saying versus what was actually
coming out was a difference of about 4000 percent
above the legal limit for emissions. And so after
enough poking and prodding, Volkswagen. finally
fessed up to the fact that they had installed
a defeat device on the computers of these cars
that when they knew that they were being scanned,
when they were being tested for emissions, that
they would top out below the legal limit. But
as soon as that testing was over, then it was...
Let her rip. And that came out to about 400 times
the legal emissions limit. And they had to pay
billions of dollars to do a recall. And then
not just that, but also the fines associated
with lying and getting caught up and all this
stuff. Yeah, and then they decided to throw their
hat into the EV ring, so no telling what they're
doing with all that. I don't even know what the
regulations are for EVs right now. I'm sure that
there's something. I don't feel like there's
a ton either, but they've been around long enough
that, like, what are they doing with these batteries?
Yeah. Your battery's swapped out and your EV
is expensive as hell. Yeah, with like, I think
like hybrids and EVs, you get like 100 ,000 miles
out of them and then you have like a $10 ,000
replacement for the battery for it. Yeah. That's
what I understand about electric cars. But I
think that so much of it is... thus far a little
hard to regulate just because it's so new and
moving so quickly. Slower than AI, but for the
same kind of reasons that it's hard to find.
It's hard to kind of get ahead of the innovation
to do things the right way. Yeah. I don't know.
I don't know. I don't have an EV. Don't plan
on getting an EV until they decide to put out
a Ram EV. But then Trump took office and then
people were like, woo, gas. And so Ram decided
to postpone the release of their Ram EV. So I'm
just waiting. I don't think I would ever necessarily
want to get an EV. Yeah. I mean, that's based
on the technology that exists right now, not
the technology that will always exist. But I
don't think that I would ever want to fully separate
myself from gas -powered vehicles. For right
now, it's in large part a charging issue. Mm
-hmm. That if you go on, say, a long -haul trip,
you can always find a gas station, but you can't,
in a lot of the states right now, find good charging
ports. Yeah, I mean, it takes a lot more planning.
Also, the mining that goes into making those
batteries is at best a little ethically dicey.
Yeah, you start picking at that thread and then
there's a lot of stuff that you are no longer
able to use. We would not be doing any of the
podcasting that we're doing right now, I'm sure.
We would not. That is what it is, I guess. I
mean, I don't know how to save that. Do you know
how to save it? Do you have any suggestions?
I'm all for homesteading, but I think that line
might be drawn before making my own phone. Now,
I do wish that I was more in control of the...
The sourcing of things in my life. Yeah. That
is always a really tough thing when it comes
to. A being in an apartment, so I can't really,
you know, grow my own food. And. Be the expenses
that come with buying things that are. Created
properly. So. It's a it's a move that I would
like to be a part of just. Not yet. I guess I'm
still in this consumerism hell for a little while
longer. Well, if you're going to be there anyways,
you might as well enjoy it. Sure. Yeah. But you
did you did earlier bring up Enron. Honestly,
their stuff is like the white collariest white
collar crimes of all time. It's all real, real
heady stuff. Real. A lot of shell corporations
that they would move all of their liabilities
to so that they didn't show up on their like
sheets during like earnings. What are they called?
Just like earnings calls. Yeah. Well, like the
like the end of year reporting, they wouldn't
have to list it because technically it was over
here at the shell corporation. But Enron was
still responsible for it. And it was just investor
fraud. And a lot of the employees, their retirements,
their pensions, all that stuff was wrapped up
in Enron stock, which at the height of it was
hovering around like $90 a share, which is a
lot for a share of a company, especially when
you're dealing with as many shares as Enron would
have. Everything hit the fan. All of a sudden,
those ninety dollar shares were worth pennies,
if not less, like almost nothing, pretty much
nothing. And then in the blink of an eye, all
these people, not just employees, but all these
people that had any investments within Ron were
just out in the cold. And the bigwigs tried tried
to cut and run the. CEO and founder of Enron
was convicted of fraud, but then died before
he could get to sentencing. So never actually
saw prison for it. Another CEO, Jeffrey Skilling,
was sentenced to over 14 years in prison, convicted
on multiple charges of fraud, just all over the
place, just all kinds of silly behavior and just
screwing over. Every person that ever put any
money into Enron, the CFO, Andrew Fastow, is
the one that spearheaded moving all the assets
or the liabilities into shell corporations. But
he got a reduced sentence because he helped get
the two upper guys. And Arthur Anderson, which
was an accounting firm that... signed off on
everything knowing that things were hinky and
ended up that accounting firm just just went
away because of the scandal and no one would
trust you with their money if you were wrapped
up in enron yeah and uh the whole house of cards
came tumbling down when a uh the company's vice
president blew the whistle on everything that
was going on in 2001 Start from the top. So start
with Ken, the CEO and founder that died before
he could be sentenced and then worked her way
down the line. And Enron is, I think it's one
of the, it's like the poster child for corporate
fraud. It is the reason that a lot of laws were
put into place to prevent this from happening
again. Was it the Sarbanes -Oxley Act? Sarbanes
-Oxley Act, yeah. Look at me. Okay. Putting that
two years of accounting work to good use. Yeah,
that was one of the biggest things that came
out of the Enron scandal. And it just put a tighter
grip on the things that these corporations could
get away with. And my last one I have for you.
is, uh, funny, not funny. It's Wells Fargo and
their tactics on getting more checking, more
people signed up for checking accounts, credit
cards, home loans, all that kind of stuff. Creating
people, fake people. I mean, it seems like Wells
Fargo is the bank that's always caught up in
some sort of new whatever. And so this one wasn't
really a surprise. They set extremely aggressive
sales targets to try to bring in more people,
more customers. It's kind of weird to think of
a bank as a business. Sure. There's competition.
There's they have to make money somehow in order
to pay the tellers, pay for just the day to day.
So it makes if you look at it from that point
of view, it makes sense that it is a business.
But on the same hand, it's just like, well, my
money has to go somewhere and then I have to
be able to get my money. So there's not really.
Any option but using a bank. So it's kind of,
I don't know, it's strange. The whole banking
industry is very strange. And they ended up creating
millions of fake accounts connected to people
that did not exist. Or they would take your information
and create a whole nother account for you and
not tell you about it. Huh. Interesting. So they
would create. Credit cards. They would do lines
of credit. They would do housing loans that on
paper existed and they would be connected to
people. But those people would not be made aware
until something happened and everything was brought
to light. I wonder if this could have been helped
by the favorite of the pod, FreeCreditReport
.com. I'm sure it could have. I know if I see
something pop up, I mean, I don't know. I use
Credit Karma. Is FreeCreditReport .com an app
now? No. So FreeCreditReport .com is actually
just a part of one of the big three. So Credit
Karma goes through all three. So it's TransUnion,
Equifax, and I don't remember the third one.
FreeCreditReport .com is part of Equifax. Huh.
Credit Karma pulls from all of it. That seems
like a... So you can only get your Equifax from
FreeCreditReport .com? FreeCreditReport .com
is a part of Experian. So you can pull just your
Experian information if you go to that website
still, which from what I remember, because I
did look it up after that episode, it does still
exist. But I think it just routes to Experian.
Hmm. I know that. But yeah, if something pops
up, I'm made aware of it and I would see that.
But I don't think that that's everyone's. I don't
think a lot of people have their credit top of
mind very much. I mean, it's mostly when you're
like in the house buying process, which is what
we're. That's that's why I'm keeping an eye on
it right now. is just make sure everything is
there for whenever we move. But yeah, I mean,
if I weren't in this position, then I probably
wouldn't keep as vigilant of an eye on it as
I do. So I think that it would probably be pretty
easy to use my information towards something
like that and get away with it. They were charged
out the wazoo in fines for their misdeeds. I
remember it being a big thing when it happened,
and then it just went away. Because, I mean,
do you even remember it? I don't remember that
one either. Yeah. How long ago was that? I remember
when it happened. It was 2016, so not that long
ago. Interesting. And then that led to changing
the whole way they look at the numbers, not just
for Wells Fargo, but all the other banks, too.
tactics to maybe not put such a high priority
or so much stress on getting new clients so that
people would feel like they needed to cut these
corners in order to hit those quotas, but instead
just harass their current customers to sign up
for something legitimately. Which every time
I go to an ATM, it's, hey, would you like to
hear more about this? No, thank you. No, I do
not. I can't log into my banking app without
it suggesting that I apply for their credit card.
Yeah. Oh, OK. So our Greek buddies, Charles Ponzi,
Bernie Madoff, Victor Lustig, Theranos, Volkswagen,
Enron, Wells Fargo. What is your favorite fraud
that we talked about? You know what? I have to
stick with my my original answer. It's got to
be the dude who sold the Eiffel Tower. successfully
and then ran to America when he couldn't sell
it a second time. I feel like that one at least
has some kind of like don't get me wrong there's
not there's not humor in any of this stuff in
the sense that like people did very much get
screwed in every every one of these scenarios.
Every single one. But of them the fact that he
got away with it the first time because the other
dude was just not willing to fess up to the fact
that he bought. 1 .2 million francs worth of
something that was not for sale. It's pretty
incredible. Oh, yeah, it is. I think my favorite
one is probably Theranos because Elizabeth Holmes
is just such a kooky lady. Yeah. And just very
unsettling. I may have to watch the dropout now.
You should. Have you seen it? I've seen bits
of it. But I don't think I've actually seen a
full episode. But I'll add it to my list. Maybe
we can watch a couple episodes and reconvene
in the next pod. There we go. All right. You
got anything to leave our peeps with? I don't
have a good takeaway. Don't commit fraud feels
like a pretty baseline suggestion. Yeah. But
if you have any thoughts, if you have a... Story
that you are most interested in in this episode.
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If you learned anything, if we got something
wrong, let us know. There we go. Yeah. All right.
My words of wisdom for this episode about schemes
and scams would be. If you're going to scheme
and scam, make it funny. Don't make it detrimental
to someone else. There are scams and schemes
you can pull that, I mean, it's just, it's a
little, what would you call that? What's above
a prank but below a scheme? I think scam is above
a prank but below a scheme. That's your, like,
middle ground, I think. Ah, okay. Well, then
maybe... Now that you mention not making it funny
necessarily, but I was reminded of a scam that
was just not funny for the people involved, but
funny as a person on the internet. Do you remember
when... I think it was in Scotland or maybe Ireland.
They decided they were going to make a whole
Willy Wonka experience. And it was just like
three people dressed as Oompa Loompas. They had
a tapestry that was like a tablecloth they bought
off of Amazon. And there was someone called the
unknown there for some reason. Like that was
a character in the series. If you're going to
pull a scam, do something like that. There you
go. See? See, that is a funny scam. And if you
don't know what I'm talking about, look it up.
So if you're going to pull a scam, make it like
the Willy Wonka experience. And with that, we'll
see ya. Peace out, Girl Scouts. I swear, it's
gonna look like I have the biggest coke problem.
My nose is so itchy.