As I live and breathe, raises! Five, four, three,
two, one, zero. Welcome to the show, people.
Welcome to the show. Eat my shorts. So here is
to conversation. Tranquility base here. The ankle
has landed. welcome to the cash exchange welcome
what's up see you are in a brand new fancy looking
kitchen with your little i'm in the lap of luxury
here in bean town the city of of beans the city
of nerds why is chicago not the bean town why
why is boston bean town boston baked beans oh
i think i don't know maybe that came after i
have no clue i don't know Maybe Paul Revere was
really into beans. The magical fruit? Mm -hmm.
Huh. Maybe. I don't know. I don't know. I'll
ask. I'll ask. I got a good connect here, so
I'll ask him why it's called Beantown. I'm sure
they learned it in school. Yeah. Does he have
the thick accent that I can't mock? Mm -hmm.
He does. I can't do a good Boston. He's like
if Peter Griffin was just a real dude. He's like
the dude that Peter Griffin would be based off
of. He's very New England and he's very, he's
a nice guy. A lot of people here aren't nice.
I think that's just the Northeast in general.
I think they just think that they've got a lot
going on when they really don't. I will live
and die by Noah Khan's music, despite the fact
that I've been to the Northeast once in my life.
Yeah. So for those that don't know, Beantown,
Boston, Massachusetts, you could give me. 20
tries. I couldn't spell Massachusetts right.
I was looking up something in Massachusetts the
other day, and I swear to God I spelled it four
different kinds of wrong. There's too many double
letters. At some point, just relax a little.
I agree. I agree. Sets shouldn't have two Ts.
That's stupid. What about some Quaker pilgrim
nonsense that is just a holdover? We're okay
to mock the Quakers, right? They're not going
to hear this. Yeah. Yeah, I think they'd be fine.
And even if they did hear it and they got a little
upset, they can't do anything about it. Quakers
are pacifists. Are they? Didn't know that. You
didn't know that's like their big thing? That
they're pacifists? I know zero things about the
Quakers outside of the oats. Yeah, well, you're
not going to see him kicking anyone's ass. He's
going to try to solve his... disagreements through
words oh okay like rap battle style or yeah yeah
an epic rap battle of history did you ever watch
those on youtube i loved those i haven't seen
they just posted a new one pretty recently i
think it's probably like trump and elon i haven't
watched that i didn't know they still did them
the brain rot is the brain rot is real you tired
of hearing about good old dj t and and musky
mus i haven't heard anything really about the
two of them together since uh since his black
eye and he got kicked out of the white house
no since uh you know about that they were beefing
on their individual platforms yelling into the
ether that was right after he was seen at the
white house with a black eye and then no longer
was a contractor for the government or doing
whatever in whatever capacity for the government
that he was doing. Does that mean no more Doge?
Oh, no. I don't know. I don't know. But I did
spend some time driving around Boston today.
I rolled down the window. I yelled at all the
nerds at Harvard. I said, go Yale. Yeah. Like
three miles down the road, passed by MIT, told
them to suck it and Caltech is better. And then
I got caught up in all the traffic by Harvard
and MIT and regretted it. Took me like, I don't
know, 20 minutes to get five miles. Nonsense.
And just the summer. I don't know why it's so
busy over there. Yeah. This is when all the alums
are at their worst. People who never leave Boston.
Yeah. MIT nerds, you got... Harvard nerds, and
you got the frickin' townies. The frickin' townies.
The frickin' townies. The ones that hate the
first two. Don't all of them hate all of the
other ones? I would assume that there's probably
bad blood between Harvard and MIT, but they both
hate the townies. The townies hate them. The
only difference is that the townies can back
up their talk. I don't think pre... Pre -law
school nerd is gonna be able to back anything
up until he gets his degree and then he can just
sue them And get their house and make them a
townie of some other town. I don't know Anyways
Today Your three things are Deodorant Big Bang
Theory And smart cars. Are we talking Big Bang
Theory the show or Big Bang Theory the theory?
The Big Bang Theory. I don't know. I guess they
could both apply. I was thinking the show more
than the theoretical beginning of the universe.
But I mean, I guess they could both apply to
today's topic. So the Big Bang Theory, probably
the show. Deodorant. Probably the show. Self
-driving cars? Smart cars. Smart cars. No, it's
the stupidest of all cars. That's the irony.
The Cybertruck is the stupidest of all cars.
No. No. Have you been in one? No. And I have
no intention of being in one. Austin has a fire
Cybertruck. I don't know how that works. That's
pretty sweet. There is nothing more Austin than
a fire truck. So if they pull up a little too
close and the fire spreads and it sets the lithium
batteries on fire, what happens then? Then your
fire truck is going to do a claymore. That's
pretty silly. That is dumb. It is. It's real
goofy. So smart cars, the Big Bang Theory, and
deodorant. Yes. I don't even know if I have a
way to connect two of those dots. Big Bang Theory
and deodorant, full of nerds. Nerds tend to not
be as hygienic. I mean, yeah. I mean, I would
think that deodorant isn't high up on a shopping
list for especially, like, convention nerds.
I've heard stories. Never been. But I've heard
that it's not a priority. It is not, especially
considering the fact that you're packed in with
all of these people in very expensive, very heat
-trapping outfits. I've seen videos of women
peeling them off and just a pool of sweat just
falling out. And that is gross. That is some
nerds like fever dream, wet dream, really wet
dream, but not mine. That's gross. Oh, so. Reptile
dysfunction is off the table, but we can talk
about wet dreams. I mean, it's a dream about
something that's wet. Whatever happens out of
the dream is, that's not my concern. I'm just
talking about all the sweat within the dream.
And I was just talking about lizards maybe running
our government. It wasn't about lizards that
are just having a really hard time at work right
now? You'll have to listen to the episode and
find out. Will do. Will do. Okay, so... Yeah,
no. I don't think I have anything for this one.
I don't know how those things relate. Well, I'll
break it down for you. Deodorant is meant for
one place, and it's meant to serve one function.
To keep you from being musty and gross. And keeping
you pleasant to be around in a polite society.
I work in a place that that law has gone just
out the window. It is. You should start putting
up signs. Deeply problematic. Or just go and
get like some cheap ones. Put them in a basket
and say free. Or just start handing them out.
Yeah. Hey, I got this and I thought of you. Yikes.
Big Bang Theory. So if we're taking the core
cast, which started out as four, ended up at
what? Six? I don't know. I didn't finish the
last three episodes. Yeah. Or three seasons.
So it started as four and then ended at six,
right? Well, so it started with... The five,
because it started with the four guys and Penny.
Oh, Penny, yeah. And then Bernadette and Amy.
So seven. Okay, so it started at five and ended
at seven. But every single one of those characters
had one defining trait that just really never
changed about them throughout the entire series.
It went on for like, what, ten years? Sheldon
was always the smartest one in the room and just
a jackass to be around. Sure. Kuther Polly was
always the weird foreigner that was awkward around
women. He was Fez. Yeah. Wolowitz was always
the horn dog. Yeah. Leonard was always the real
awkward one, but the de facto leader of the group.
Penny was always the dumb blonde, and then whatever
the other two. Anyways, so they all had just
one trait, and that's what carried them through
the entire show. Smart cars. Very stupid car,
very stupid vehicle. It's just meant to get you
from point A to point B. There's not a single
other thing you can do with a smart car except
haul yourself to Whole Foods or wherever you're
going. Pilates, I don't know. Nate used to drive
a smart car. For those of you who need a frame
of reference, he is, I believe, 6 '2". He's a
big dude, and he drove a smart car in Berlin
for a minute. On a dare? I picture the really
tall dude in The Simpsons Nelson laughs at, where
he unfolds himself from the smart car to yell
at him. This is the only car I can afford. I
didn't know that. i'm not gonna lie i'm probably
gonna look at them differently now so that's
fair that's fair i did too it wasn't a deal breaker
or anything but it was it was close uh might
have been probably should have been but anyways
all these things one trick ponies they had a
job they did that job well but never bothered
to spread their wings and and see if they could
become something else Sure. As far as I know,
no one's ever tried to put a V8 in a smart car
and do a couple laps at Daytona. Know what I
mean? Pull a boat down the road. Maybe they have.
I haven't seen it. One trick ponies. One trick
ponies. And today's episode is specifically about
actors who are one trick ponies. Are we talking
like Will Arnett? In BoJack Horseman? Yeah. Yeah,
he didn't make my list. But he is definitely,
if they need like a smarmy dude for a voice,
with a deep voice, they're going to get Will
Arnett. They're going to get Joe Bluth in anything
that he does. Yeah. Same with my first one, Jason
Momoa. I didn't have him on my list. No? So I
was thinking about, I guess, more tenured actors
when I was looking into this. I was thinking
of people who'd had at least a decade of playing
the exact same person. Jason Momoa started in
Game of Thrones. That was like 2012. He wasn't
Jason Momoa then. He was Khal Drogo. Sure. And
that is the crazy thing about Jason Momoa is
that he started off in such a prestigious role.
and then just puttered out yeah like he never
built from that i think uh right after game of
thrones he did like uh some greek mythology movie
maybe like a hercules i could see that make a
good hercules he did something where he was he
was completely shaven and it was the wrong move
he made the mistake of being aquaman i think
that's what doomed his career Being Aquaman and
co -starring with Amber Heard were two just bad
things. Missteps. Missteps, yeah. Yeah, I mean,
like, he's always had, like, the dumb surfer
dude. And then he's always been, like, just massive
muscle. Yeah. And so those are the roles he gets.
As far as I know, he hasn't spread his wings
into something more dramatic. Past, I mean. Past
Game of Thrones, I don't think there's... In
Game of Thrones, he didn't even really have to
talk. He just grunted a lot. Sure, yeah. I mean,
I would argue that his role in Fast 15... I don't
know which one we're on now. His role in the
Fast and Furious franchise was at least a little
bit less of that kind of character. He at least
got to be a little bit more fun. Fast 10 -year
seatbelts. The Minecraft movie. The Minecraft
movie, Aquaman. I had another one. But yeah,
I mean, it's the same general character. Maybe
he's a little divergent in the Fast movies, but
not really. Not by enough to consider it a whole
new thing. And it's amazing going through all
these people and how many of them are in the
Fast series. And it's not like the Expendables
where it was just a stacked cast of like 12 people
and then the next one had 20 people and then
30 people. It's pretty much been the core people
for the entire series. And all of them are just
the Fast and Furious people. Yeah. That's pretty
much all they can do. I mean, if your name has
been Diesel. I think you are willingly putting
yourself in that box. If you change your name
from Mark Sinclair to Vin Diesel, call that.
He manifested, yeah. I mean, I don't, do you
think that Jason Momoa could do something serious?
Well? I think he could, just from what I've seen
of him in Game of Thrones. I think he could do
something a little bit more. nuanced than just
being like a buff dude as his whole character.
Not cool dude. That kind of guy? Yeah. I mean,
if you start your career on Baywatch, I think
the cards are kind of played for you. What are
you saying about Hasselhoff? That was after Knight
Rider. Never mind. What are you saying about
Pam Anderson? I have no comments on Pam Anderson.
She is going to be in the new Naked Gun movie,
and I'm super excited for that movie. I have
that in my list. Not Pam Anderson, but the Naked
Gun movie. The new one. It's on your list of
one -trick ponies? It's on my list for one of
my people. Oh, Leslie Nielsen? No, Liam Neeson.
Oh, Liam Neeson. Okay. Okay, we might get into
a lively discussion about that one. Because I
think he's got some range. So I went in on Liam
Neeson thinking he was a one trick pony, but
he had had like the Seth MacFarlane project.
So he had done like A Million Ways to Die in
the West and Ted 2. Great movie. Very underrated.
The more that I thought about it, the less I
think he fits into this box. But I do think he
has like two separate like identities. But he
was in Schindler's List. He was Oscar Schindler.
I mean, okay, fair point. Fair point. I will
remove Liam Neeson from my list. But we can still
talk about Liam Neeson. We can still talk about
Liam Neeson. Maybe we can say that he has a pre
-Taken career and a post -Taken career. That's
a fair assessment. So maybe that's where we can
still keep him on the list, all the post -Taken
stuff. Okay. I think once he found that one jacket
that he wears in Taken, It was off to the races.
He doesn't take that jacket off for like six
straight movies. Cold Pursuit. He doesn't go
jacket off for six movies? Not a long time. And
I'm the problem. You can't say a phrase like
he doesn't jacket off. He doesn't go jacket off
for six movies straight and not expect me to
say something. He doesn't remove this one specific
jacket for like six movies. Is that better? There
we go. See? See? That is not clippable. The first
one you said is completely clippable. And it
will be. The cold open of this episode is going
to be just as bad as the last one. Number two.
Sir Jack Blatt. That one also made my list. Which
was a bummer. I do love Jack Black. I like most
of the things that I've seen him in. I like him
fine. But it is astounding that he has made an
entire career off the same shit. His whole music
career is based on that. Yeah. It feels very
authentic to him. He's a good singer. He just
did a cover of Mr. Crowley by... Black Sabbath
or Ozzy Osbourne one or the other though. I don't
know That's pretty good. And like his tenacious
D stuff is fine. It's I mean it is The songs
are gimmicky, but if he was doing regular songs,
I don't think that you would think it was a gimmick
So like the music itself is fine and in a different
genre, I think that he would It wouldn't be seen
as any kind of joke or anything like that. I
think he has a real passion for it. Sure, yeah.
But he's like... I was going to say, I think
that a good rule of thumb that I found for if
it's a OneNote actor, they have this like shtick
that works for them is if they voice an animated
character who is just the exact same as every
live action one they do. Kung Fu Panda. Kung
Fu Panda. Bowser. They're both just every movie
Jack Black has done. It's funny because his thing
is like energy set to 150%. Clothes that are
way too tight. Jumping around doing kicks that
someone of his stature should not be able to
do. He's like Robin Williams, but without the...
the standup chops. Sure. Like Robin, Robin Williams
could do that with, but then have like intelligent
jokes to go with it. Like he was super high energy
and cracked out. And, but Jack Black is just
doing the same thing, but just making like noises.
Like karate. Scatting is half this man's personality.
And I respect the hell out of it. And. I don't
think I've ever seen a man in more cameos than
Jack Black. Think so? I don't think so. He was
in The Mandalorian as a cameo. He was in a game
I just played by the Rick and Morty guys. Oh,
High on Life? Yes. He was a cameo in that. Him
and Jamie Lee Curtis, maybe? weird choice some
some random female actress but yeah at the end
they were just random cameos and they immediately
died but that's just on brand for for jack black
because he's just a random cameo guy sure but
i mean he didn't start out his career like like
that i mean he um he was in high fidelity with
john cusack he had some other other stuff but
then like in the early like the really late 90s
and then into the 2000s that's when he really
honed in his persona and just the uh the lunacy
began like saving silverman he was in that he
was a nut job in that he was a lot more moderate
in shallow how i think that movie is dumb but
yeah that just the premise of the movie and Gwyneth
Paltrow just I don't know. I liked it when I
first saw it, but then I was also like, I don't
know, 13 when I saw it. So I don't think it would
hit as hard today. One movie that he starred
in that was a serious role, but it was also very
heavily painted with Jack Blackiness is Bernie.
Have you ever seen that? I don't think I ever
watched it. I remember it coming out. It's him
as a funeral director in somewhere in small town
Texas. And then Matthew McConaughey is, I want
to say like a detective, some sort of authority.
And then Shirley MacLaine. And I don't remember
the story. Look it up. It's a decent movie. It's
worth watching. Nothing spectacular, but it's
more. serious role than you've seen him in any
time recently i'd still argue that peak jack
black was tropic thunder that was like the the
apex of the lunacy and also the quality of his
movies that's true i i would love to see the
movie that he did a trailer for in yeah is that
the fats I think so, yeah. I don't know if this
would hurt the idea of monetization, but speaking
of going full retard, Nate watched The Accountant
2. And he agrees with you. It was a terrible
movie. It was a terrible movie. And it was like...
It was like... Taken meets Rain Man. Train man.
And you couldn't take it seriously. It set autism
back a couple decades. Yikes. He sent me a clip
of them line dancing where Ben Affleck is watching
their steps so that he can just suddenly replicate
it. Just pick it up like that. Copperhead Road.
One of the most redeeming parts of that movie.
except for the Ben Affleck line dancing in New
Balances. Not even going to break out the boots?
Oh, no, no, no. And that was another one that
we'll get into this a little later because I
have some issues with the way Texas is represented
in films and television. Looking at you, SpongeBob.
It was... I was mildly offended. Okay. But that'll
come up later. Next on my list, if I were to
say something like, I don't know, I'll be back,
or get to the chopper, or... I'm sorry, what
was that last one? Do you know what I'd be talking
about? Who I would be referring to? I'm a little
disappointed that you didn't use the accent in
the first two things. Where's Schwarzenegger?
Get to the chopper! I'll be back. God, the people
on either side of me are going to be getting
a real show tonight. We're talking about my man,
Arnold Schwarzenegger. He is another one that
just, if he's in a movie, you know what it's
going to be. It's just going to be he's this
unstoppable machine man. that will mow down anything
in his path. Sure. And he did try to break away
from that pretty early on, like with Jingle All
The Way, which is good. But then at the end,
he has the physique of this action figure superhero.
So that also plays into... and to see like this
hulking man that's just like a an accountant
or a I don't even remember what he is in that
movie real Clark Kent an ad guy maybe I don't
know but just completely beefed up dude just
in an office job so his his his Terminator Predator
Conan the Barbarian stuff did come into play
in that one kindergarten cop the same thing uh
it was like a fish out of water like he's this
uh big hulking man that's with all these kindergartners
and then twins the whole joke in that was that
they were twins but one is ripped and like six
six and the other one is Danny DeVito incredible
but he so I mean he did he did try his hand at
comedy He also had a cameo part in Around the
World in 80 Days, which is a great movie. Jackie
Chan. That movie had a bunch of cameos in it.
The Owen Brothers were in it. Or not the Owen
Brothers. Yeah. The Wilsons? The Wilson Brothers.
I don't know if this is an actual fact, but I
heard from a reputable source that whenever Schwarzenegger
movies play in Germany, that they're dubbed over
because his accent is so thick it is almost unintelligible
in actual German. Yeah. Apparently they're the
Austrians? Bavarians? I'm not sure exactly what
Schwarzenegger is, but that accent is just like...
He's Austrian. It's like deep south. He's a German
hick. Whenever the movies play over there, he's
just like, get in the chopper, y 'all. They're
like, I'll be back. That is exactly what I picture.
They won't let him dub his own movies in a language
he speaks fluently. It's got to be just incredibly
humbling. But as far as what I said about the
Fast series with just being full of one -trick
ponies, it's the same with the Expendables, but
to an even heavier degree. I think at least with
the Expendables, they're self -aware. They are.
Yeah. They all know what they're there for. And
I think at this point, all the people in the
Fast series know what they're there for. They're
not winning any Oscars. No, Tyrese is in it for
alimony checks. I heard a quote recently from
Samuel L. Jackson about how the movies he's in,
like he's in a lot of movies, but none of them
are like... And they're like, would you like
to win an Oscar and all this stuff? And he's
like, I don't care about that. I am in movies
that I'd want to see in a movie theater. That's
just so refreshing for someone to be honest and
just say, hey, I'm just in this for fun. I mean,
if there's anyone, it should be Samuel L. Jackson.
And it's like when Bruce Willis was doing all
these direct -to -DVD movies. And everyone was
like, oh, my God, he's fallen so far. And he
used to be in Die Hard. And he used to be like
Hollywood's It Guy. And now he's doing this.
But then you find out that he's got like this
horrible disease that is eating away at his body.
And he just wants to do as many of these as he
can so that he can leave his family as much money
as possible. Damn, I didn't know that. I didn't
know about the disease. I didn't know that he
was on a mission. No, it was like it would be
like every three months there would be a new
movie that was straight to DVD that was or I
mean, I guess now it's straight to streaming,
but that Bruce Willis was in and just no one
could understand why he had let his career go
like this. And then it comes out about the disease
stuff and that he knew that he wouldn't be able
to do it for much longer. So he's got to get
as much in as possible. And then, like, the ones
towards the end were, like, he was literally
just in them and not doing much. Just in them
so that he could collect that paycheck. Yeah.
But I also had some honorable mentions for this
one. I didn't really take too many notes on anything
with their careers or anything. A lot of people
that we've talked about previously in these episodes,
but numero uno, Dakota Johnson, our fave. I do
like her. She's just so weird. She is weird.
And she's the same exact character. It doesn't
matter if she's a sex slave in Fifty Shades or
if she is supposed to be spearheading this whole
Spider -Verse thing. It's the same character,
same delivery. Save everything that you're going
to get from her. No matter what. Does that stop
me from wanting to watch The Materialist? Not
at all. It's Pedro Pascal and Captain America.
And Dakota Johnson. No thanks. No thanks. I'm
out on Pedro. What? Why? Because I'm not buying
into it. They're trying to push him too hard.
And I just think that he's a very weird dude.
And something's going to come out sooner or later.
You think so? I do. I think that he's a very...
I think he's got some skeletons in that closet.
That's a bummer. That would be a bummer. I'm
in the middle of playing The Last of Us 2 right
now. Technically it has nothing to do with him.
Can't do it. I don't do that jumpy stuff. It's
not really as jump scary as you think it'd be.
No? No. There's a specific kind of the zombies
that are more jump scary because they're stealthy
and so you can't hear or see them coming. All
the time. But other than that. It's not bad.
I have it set on one of the easier settings.
So it's not as jumpy. They have a lot lower health.
Hashtag still not sponsored by Pepsi. But hopeful.
Not yet. If they're willing to sponsor Madam
Web. They can sponsor us. I agree. We are much
more entertaining. For the right reason. I like
to think so. With a much lower budget. The cost
to sponsor us is. It's very low. Yeah, just,
I mean, maybe slip us like a 50 and a couple
cases of Pepsi. We'll start there. Until we work
our way up to a Kendall Jenner commercial. Ugh,
gross. And solve racism. But she already solved
racism. What are we going to solve? Poverty?
Yeah. Just like give it to a homeless person?
Yeah. Yeah, we'll walk around. We'll hand out
Pepsis to homeless people and then just like
throw. Golden coins at them. The chocolate covered
kind. Yeah. Yeah. High in protein. I also had,
as an honorable mention, Sylvester Stallone.
Sure. I don't think he ever escaped Rocky. He's
doing some stuff now like Tulsa King, King of
Tulsa. Tulsa King. But it's essentially just
a mobster. Which, I mean, he was in that era
of, like, if it wasn't Rocky, then it was a mobster.
He was just a tough guy, that kind of shtick.
Vin Diesel, another honorable mention. We've
talked ad nauseum about Mark. Mr. Sinclair. So
much so, we're on a first -name basis with him.
A real first -name basis. Yeah, we don't call
him Vin, we call him Mark. Mr. Sinclair, if he
pisses us off. Oh, and then we have, uh, Dwayne,
the Boulder Johnson, no matter how hard he tries,
he's always just the rock. And I think that might
be a curse of having a persona built around a
nickname. Yeah. Cause like Stone Cold Steve Austin
is always just going to be a Stone Cold Steve
Austin. The Rock is just always going to be The
Rock. Steve Austin seems like the dude who matches
with everybody on Tinder. But no, do you think
he's leaning away from The Rock persona? I don't
feel like he is. I don't think he is either.
I think that he tried his hand at steering away
from it for a little bit. He's got a movie coming
out soon about an MMA fighter. And it's a dramatic
role from what I gather about it. But you're
still, they had to put like 15 pounds of prosthetics
on his face for you to not look at and say, oh,
that's just The Rock. Yeah. Like he looks pretty
unrecognizable and I'll watch it. I'll see how
he does and I'll report back. But I don't have
very high hopes for it. I could see that. I mean,
it would seem like he's kind of returning to
his roots in that, so it might not be bad. It
might not. I don't know. I'm so tired of The
Rock. I liked him when he first came out, like
when he did The Game Plan, which was one of his
first actual movies. You know what his first
one was? His first one was, what was it? Be Cool,
right? That was early on, but I don't think that
was his first one. I'm pretty sure his first
one was the Scorpion King in Mummy 2. Okay. With
just the absolute worst CGI you've ever seen.
But I'm pretty sure that was his first big movie
role. Yeah. And then he started breaking out
and doing those. Be Cool, Walking Tall. other
tooth fairy films tooth fairy yeah he did have
a string of family comedies yeah yeah and then
he nailed down the smolder like eugene entangled
and the rest is history because we had a span
of like five years maybe where we had jungle
cruise jumanji journey to the center of the earth
the worst one not the one with brendan frazier
Yeah. Central Intelligence with Kevin Hart. Rampage.
San Andreas. Lots of forgettable movies. Yeah.
Rampage was a remarkably stupid movie based on
an okay video game. Do you have any more for
this list? Because I have a whole nother side.
I have a B -side to this record. How did you
split it in half? What was your dividing line?
Next part is about one -trick ponies that broke
the mold. Oh, okay. In that case, I do have some
extra ones. Shoot. So, I think you mentioned
it earlier. Jason Statham. Yeah. I mean, he was
in the Expendables fast bubble. Yeah. I don't
think I specifically named him. So whenever I
was trying to build this list of actors, I was
trying to find the one thing that kind of broke
them out of this role. And his was one that the
best case scenario that I could find was Spy,
which was still just him parodying everything
that he does in every other movie he's been in,
which feels a little gratuitous. I don't think
that that's making the point you want it to.
I had one of the Nepo babies that I think we
forgot in the episode on Nepo babies, which is
Kristen Stewart. She's a Nepo baby? Her dad is
a director, I think. Huh. Let's see. Yeah, I
didn't have her on my list, but I should have.
I can't stand her. Jon Stewart is a TV producer,
and Jules Stewart is a filmmaker. Huh. She is
one of the, I feel like, most infamous one -trick
ponies. Just because she does the same, like,
brooding thing. Just like Deadpan. Yes. In everything
she does. Yeah. The counterpoint to that was
when she did Princess Di in Spencer. Which I
haven't seen. But I've heard. I've heard not
good things. I believe it. I had Ryan Reynolds.
Also a... Is he on your B -side? No, but I wouldn't
say that he necessarily broke from his typecasting
because a lot of the stuff that he does, he still
goes back to the well. Like a lot of the Deadpool
stuff is just stuff that he was doing when he
was first starting out, like the Van Wilder,
uh, waiting, that kind of stuff is all in Deadpool.
Um, but he, he does have the ability to, to break
away from that and do like dramatic stuff or,
or stuff that takes more than, uh, yeah. Have
you ever seen the movie, uh, buried? Yeah. That
was the, the exception that I had, but other
than that, I couldn't find. a movie of his that
didn't feel like he could have been copy pasted
from waiting he wasn't like the uh in uh the
proposal with sandra bullock he wasn't like the
the smarmy jackass all the time and then he has
like a a character shift towards the end yeah
where he seems like he actually learned a lesson
versus i don't know movies like waiting or deadpool
or van wilder yeah i think the the writing for
the proposal is a little bit different character
arc wise than than a lot of the stuff that he
does but he still feels like he's the same guy
just a little bit less of a dick in the proposal
like he's still he's still sarcastic he bullies
sandra bullock into proposing to him which he
should that is the appropriate response to that
situation but detective pikachu even animated
like i said he's still the exact same as as deadpool
just with the pg -13 mouth take a quick gander
at his imdb it's gonna prove me wrong show me
this man's got range i'm just curious i think
for the most part you're probably right and the
ones that i'm thinking of are just like outliers
but his name is ryan rodney reynolds that's too
many r's It's amazing how many things on here
are Deadpool things. Let's go before Deadpool.
Hey, the Green Lantern. I forgot about the Green
Lantern. I bet he wishes he could forget about
the Green Lantern. Especially given all the Blake
Lively things now. Amityville Horror. Okay. I'll
give you that. When he for realsies hit a kid.
But yeah, I think those are outliers here. Pretty
spot on. Next up, I had Manic Pixie Dream Girl
Queen, Zooey Deschanel. Yes. She started out
as like the gothy brooding archetype. Did she?
Yeah. One of the McConaughey rom -coms. Oh, Failure
to Launch? Yeah, either that one or How to Lose
a Guy in 10 Days. One of those. Yeah, she's like
the jerky best friend and is like the a -hole
the whole movie. Yeah. Whatever the opposite
of dramatic relief? No. What's the opposite of
comedic relief? It's a dramatic... I don't know.
Maybe. I don't know. She's also a little bit
more straightforward and kind of a bummer in
Our Idiot Brother, the one with Paul Rudd, because
he's supposed to be the one that's just off the
wall. But by and large, her biggest character
trait is she has bangs. And I feel like that's
a problem. There was a while I was in middle
school and I had like straight across bangs and
people would compare me to her so often and it's
literally just because I had the ukulele how
dare you you know what maybe I did get bullied
into it I don't know subconsciously I just needed
to another thing on the Deschanel bingo card
Date Chanel number five for when you want to
smell like a 40 year old toddler. But I've been
rewatching new girl and she just, she gets on
my nerves. She's just so much of a caricature
of a human being. It's just exhausting. Yeah.
Especially in the beginning. Does it still work?
Any kind of depth. Is it still enjoyable? Yes,
but not for her. Got some Schmidt on your face.
The Nick and Schmidt dynamic is the absolute
best part of the show. The guys are the best
part of that show. I think about Winston a lot.
I have a board in my kitchen. AKA, AKA. Winnie
the Bish. Winnie the Bish. I have a board in
my kitchen and the quote on it right now is,
as I live and breathe, raises. It's such a dumb
quote. I feel like I could watch New Girl again
from the beginning. I don't feel that way about
How I Met Your Mother. And I don't know why.
Maybe it's because I watched How I Met Your Mother
so many times before. And I kind of feel the
same way about The Office now. Whenever I couldn't
find anything else to watch, I'd always put on
The Office. I can't tell you the last time I
saw an episode of The Office. I stopped watching
it once they took it off of Netflix. I think
it just like... I don't know why that was the
dividing line because I had the other streaming
service that it moved to because I think it's
on Peacock now. It's on Peacock. I got tired
of it. I think that was my, like, I'm good. It's
actually worth revisiting on Peacock because
they have extended cuts of the episodes. Yeah.
But then they also have edited the episodes that
are on there. So, like, you remember whenever
Colin Robinson, whenever he was on... On The
Office. I can't think of the actor's name. I
just always call him Colin Robinson. I know who
you're talking about, but I can't remember when
he was on The Office. He was in The Warehouse
with Daryl. Oh, okay, yeah. And there's a Christmas
episode where Dwight is Belschnickel. And Belschnickel's
assistant is named Black Peter. And in the folklore,
it's a little enslaved person. So in wherever
this is from, I don't remember where, is it from
Germany? Yeah. Yeah. Belchnickel is portrayed
by a white person in blackface. And there was
a scene in the office. Where Colin Robinson shows
up as Belschnickel in blackface. Oh, good Lord.
Oh, he's like, what was it? So Dwight was doing
his Belschnickel thing. And then he calls him
on the phone and he's walking in from the parking
lot. And he says, it's off. It's off. Don't,
don't come. the actor that plays colin robinson
is in full blackface and just this um uh what
one of those uh menstrual like a menstrual like
outfit walking into the office he turns around
and gets back in his car and then in the next
scene you see him at the party he's still wearing
the same clothes but he took off most of the
makeup but then there's like black paint behind
his ear and they took all that out of the episode
I can't imagine why. Because this world is just
full of pansies, that's why. Uh -huh. So you
can't watch the beginning of How I Met Your Mother?
Not really, no. I've tried a couple times. And
I always feel like, why am I doing this? I don't
know. I can't enjoy it like I used to. Yeah.
I don't know if there's no particular reason
for it. I re -watched How I Met Your Mother.
Last year or the year before. And my perspective
on it has completely changed. Yeah. And it is
very much ruined the show for me. What was your
perspective before? He does suck. Well, so like
watching it the first time around, I watched
it when it aired, which was 05 to 13. 13, I think.
Yeah. Yeah. I remember watching like the finale
like day of. And. I watched it without any kind
of like nuance because I hadn't I was too young
to have experienced anything romantic. Yeah.
And having I'm 26 now. So having experienced
the world as an adult, he's just the worst. The
worst. He is. And his motivations for everything
is completely selfish and completely unrealistic.
Yeah. But he. Just keeps chugging along anyways.
And everyone's like, hey, man, you're doing great.
Keep going. Keep doing what you're doing because
it's definitely working. I was watching a TikTok
the other day of Josh Radner, who is Anti's head,
which makes me just incredibly happy. But I was
watching this video of Josh Radner and he was
talking about a scene where he's going to find
Robin's locket in the last season. This is supposed
to be his grand romantic gesture for a woman
he is still in love with, despite the fact that
she is marrying one of his best friends. Best
friend. Yep. He's on a bridge with a like stalker
of his, and he's having this conversation. He's
like, if you really love somebody, you never
stop. Like you just always keep going. You like,
we'll get the thing that you want. Like you just
have to keep trying for it. And so Josh Radner
says there's. People that will still come up
to me like all of the time and say, I love that
speech. Like that's what motivated me to keep
going after that person. He was like, I need
you to stop. That was not the takeaway. That
poor girl. He was like, you're not supposed to
be rooting for this. Yeah. Like in real life,
that's just not how this works. And so much of
that show is just him. Like the only reason that
Robin is still. in his life is because she's
a part of the group and wants to stay a part
of the group because it's the first friend she's
ever had there's no reason she would be in ted's
life otherwise he sucks and he is actively trying
to change her for nine straight seasons down
to the finale when the love of his life dies
spoiler alert sorry no don't don't be sorry it
was a stupid ending and oh this is this is how
we planned it all along no it's not No, it's
not. You're a liar. That whole last season was
just a bullet train because you knew you had
no more track left. So you're just trying to
speed to get there as fast as you could. And
it showed. I mean, that's a problem that you're
going to have with most shows because people...
if there's no ending then people get to create
their own ending but when you show them how it
ended then one you're not going to live up to
the expectations of what these people had planned
and what these people thought that it was going
to be because they've built up this huge thing
in their head and two you you don't space it
outright the only show in recent history that
I think really stuck the landing was Breaking
Bad the ending of Breaking Bad and the ending
of Better Call Saul which I mean pretty much
it's the same show yeah that's because everyone
knew what had to happen at the end it started
off with Walt discovering that he has cancer
finding a solution to leave money for his family
and then This man who had just been in service
to other people his entire life was finally doing
something that he enjoyed for himself and it
was only for himself. And so you just knew that
based on his decisions and what he was doing
and based on how the story began, you knew that
it was going to end with violence and you knew
that he was going to die at the end. That's all
you had to do. But with a show like How I Met
Your Mother. There's so many potential ways that
it could go that you just could not, you couldn't
live up to the expectation. You couldn't find
a way that would satiate enough people to say
that was a great way to end this series. I beg
to differ on that one. Oh yeah? Okay. I think
that there was a good way to end the show that
didn't flip off the fans. Okay, so how would
you have ended it? The entire point of the show
from start to finish was that the journey from
point A to point B is what's important. Realistically,
the kids existed for most of the time that Ted
and Tracy were together. You didn't need, as
a fan necessarily, a whole breakdown of their
relationship. We know how Ted is in relationships.
We get introduced to Tracy and we can imagine
that they're the same kind of weirdo because
that's... what is supposed to make them work
better than anyone else. I think if they had
done Robin and Barney's happily ever after with
far Hampton, Ted had met Tracy and they had just
ended it with, and that kids is how I met your
mother. I think it would have been a satisfying
ending because the whole thing was about like,
this is the rough road that it took us to get
here, but we're here. I think that it would have
been a fine ending if it had just done more of
a Sopranos, like cut to black. I think that that
would have been a much better way to end things
than nine years later, we have not moved an inch.
He married this woman. He had children with this
woman, and he is still in love with Robin, who
was married to his best friend. That feels like
it negates any shred of growth that Ted might
have had in the entire span of the show. And
it felt like it was an intentional... It felt
like... Subversion for the, just to subvert.
Yeah. Like, oh, you thought this was how it was
going to end? Well, boom. I don't know. I was
extremely disappointed with it. And I think that
that probably is a reason why I have such a hard
time watching the first stuff, like the first
season now, is because I know that it's all for
nothing. It's all baloney. Right. And I know
how it ends. But no, I agree with you that if
they... If they hadn't done the whole flash forward,
I guess, and dad, you're in love with Aunt Robin.
And then she just happens to be divorced. Where
was Barney? Yeah. Like this character that we've
watched this entire show from the very first
episode. And now all of a sudden he's just out
of the picture for some reason. And Robin's fair
game. And so now that's how you're going to end
it. It doesn't make any sense. Yeah. I think.
As far as like so the cop out that they had was
that they had already filmed the kids things
back in 05 when obviously Lindsay Finesca and
David Henry were significantly younger. Yeah,
it would have made so much sense if just in the
last bit of the show that it had cut to them
in present day and been like, oh, my God, I feel
like that took forever. Like you didn't have
to reuse footage from 2005. You could have just
done this like nod to the fact that it has taken
them nine years to hear this story. Yeah, you
could have. Yeah. And then I think it also might
have been a little less of a slap in the face
if at the end of season eight, he had gotten
with the mom and then you just spent that entire
season seeing a sped up version of their relationship
until she died. Instead of doing all that in
like two episodes at the very end of the series.
She spends more time with almost every member
of the group as she does with Ted. Yeah. Well,
I think we've gotten a pretty solid episode out
of this. So I think we're going to do a part
two with mold breakers. Yeah. Yeah. So you compile
your list and we will continue this on to...
Next week's episode. All right. Any closing words
of wisdom? Hmm. If you can only do one thing,
but you can do that one thing well, then who
cares? Make that money. Live your life. And enjoy
it. Make the most of it. You don't have to branch
out to be special. You can just be the guy that
says, Ah! And that's perfectly fine. That is
perfectly fine. What about you? Remember, in
the case that you don't want to be the guy that...
Go ahead. I'm not going to do it. Come on. Try
it. Come on. Do it one more time. You sound like
Chewbacca. No. See? Okay. That's a common misconception.
Because it is Chewbacca. But there's an Austrian
twang to it. A redneck Austrian twang to it.
A redneck Chewbacca. If you don't want to be
like our boy Mark Sinclair, remember that you
contain multitudes. That's all I got. All right.
Well, while we still have you here, check us
out on Instagram at CashExchangePod. Check us
out on Twitter at CashExchangePod. Catch us on
TikTok, which I believe now is CashExchangePod.
Or send us an email at CashExchangePod at gmail
.com. And with that, we'll see you. Peace out,
Girl Scouts.