I always assumed that it was like a hide -the
-snossage kind of situation. Like the night's
going great and then at the end of the night,
all of a sudden, you're having brats instead
of tacos, you know what I mean? Welcome to the
show, people. Welcome to the show. Eat my shorts.
So here is to conversation. Tranquility base
here. Vehicle has landed. to Cash Exchange. What's
up? Welcome. How's good old Austin treating you?
It is great. I left work the other day at four
o 'clock in the afternoon. My car read that it
was 112 degrees and it was bad enough that whenever
I sat down in my car, I had to stand back up
and stand outside of my car as it aired out because
I think I seared my thighs. Do you have the remote
start on your car? I do not. No? Oh. No. What?
Was your car made, like, in the 90s? You had
to crank the windows, too? I miss the little
window cranks. Let me guess. Your car doesn't
even stop running at every red light? It doesn't
need to. You can't hear it turn on. You would
never know if it was off. Oh, so the reason you
don't have a remote start is because of... Because
I care about the environment. Yeah, because of
that hippy, hippy -dippy nonsense. Mm -hmm. Okay.
You've known me for 26 years now. You know I'm
all about hippy -dippy nonsense. Yeah, that's
true. All right, today's episode for you. I'll
admit... What do you got? It's a bit of a stretch.
So if you don't get it... Haven't they all been?
I haven't had a single person who sees my Instagram
hints that drop on usually Tuesdays. This week
it's going to be Wednesday at Cash Exchange Podcast.
On Instagram. Or, you know, while you're at it,
on Cash Exchange Podcast on Instagram, you could
also go to our ex -Twitter Cash Exchange Pod.
Sure, yeah. Or you could check out our new TikTok,
the Cash Exchange Podcast on TikTok. Or, you
know what? If none of those work for you, you
want to go old school, shoot us an email at gmail
at cashexchangepod at gmail .com. If you're a
real fan, send us a carrier pigeon. I've always
wanted to see one of those in action. carrier
pigeon uh tell you what if you want to start
sending us stuff i'll go set up a p .o box send
us a squire with some parchment tell us how you
really feel uh okay your three things today are
madam webb the incredible movie classic film
starring dakota johnson sydney sweeney who is
i'm sorry what who else is in that movie what
do you mean I mean, you gave me so much grief
the last time that we had a conversation about
Madam Webb because the only two people that I
knew the names of were Sidney Sweeney and Dakota
Johnson. Who were the other two? I don't think
that I should have to answer that to hide your
covert racism. Uh -huh. Sure. Blame me. Yeah.
So, Madam Webb. Madam Webb, the great film heavily
sponsored by... Pepsi. Hashtag, this isn't sponsored.
Are we also, I was about to say. No. No, and
I think those other two names that you were looking
for are, off the top of my head, Isabella Merced
and Celeste O 'Connor. Yeah, that sounds right.
Impressive. Just pulled those out of the old
noodle. Yep, and not anywhere else. Uh -huh.
Okay. So, Madam Web, internet meltdowns. Okay.
And doesn't have to be Karen. It can be any kind
of internet meltdown. Karen, Ken. I think it's
better if we don't throw Karens under the bus
on this one. We'll lose one of our five followers.
Is Karen taboo? Is that one of those words you
can't say? I think it's a matter of perspective,
and from the perspective of one of our original
listeners, yes. If you use it in that context,
despite the fact that it is her name and it has
been her name for a very long time. That is correct.
And she'll tell you that ad nauseum that she
was Karen before Karens were a Karen. I don't
think that that's true. Because I think the concept
of a Karen has been around for quite some time.
Have you ever met a Ken, a Karen's counterpart?
Is that what a Karen's counterpart is? Because
I don't feel like it should be Kin. Well, I think
that it was until Ryan Gosling came in and saved
the day for Kins all over the world. He reclaimed
the name. He redefined what a Kin was. I see
Kins a little bit differently. I think of Kins
as like the... It's the quote from the Barbie
movie where it's like, Ken can't have a good
day unless Barbie looks at him. I think of them
as those kind of guys. So just like the puppy
dog? Not the ones that are... Yes. Yeah. Okay.
But as far as... I think it's Chad's. Chad's
are more... I think Chad's are the... Chad's
aren't the ones instigating arguments. Chad's
want to just live their best bro life. Yeah.
Yeah, like... Wasn't Pete Davidson? Didn't he
have a character that was named Chad? And he
was just like, oh, uh -huh. Oh, cool. No matter
what happened around him or what he said, everything
was just real chill. Yes. I don't know if you've
ever met a Chad. I've never met a Chad who is
a shred of level -headed. That's okay. I'll give
you that. Yeah. Okay. Maybe it's Karen's and
Chad's. I think it's Karen's and Chad's. Quick
tangent while we're on the topic of Ken. One
of the things that my kids have recently started
doing is just to do a vibe check, just to see
how your day was and really get a good sense
of where you are mentally and emotionally. They'll
just check in. Hey, have you felt the Kinergy
today? And I love it. It's the best. That's so
cute. I am definitely going to be using that
in my everyday life. All right, Madam Web. I'm
feeling the energy today. Internet meltdowns.
Sermon farts. Excuse me? Sermon farts. You're
sitting in the chair, in the pew, what have you,
on a Sunday. You're listening to the good word.
Start off your week right. I don't know, Pastor
Bill's up there and just... preaching the good
word and then all of a sudden just a it's it's
never egregious like there's never one where
you felt like they probably should have left
and had someone else take over but it's just
it's a little it's a little the little subtle
things that you pick up on that uh wait so if
it's not the big egregious ones do you still
hear them or are they just like emotional farts
it's a great question and i appreciate you For
being willing to go there. It's nonverbal. It's
body language. I think farts are supposed to
be nonverbal. I don't know. I don't know. I've
heard some sounded like Satan was talking. But
no, I just think that maybe like if you're an
experienced orator, if you are well versed in
what you're reading, then there shouldn't be
any like unexpected pauses. Unless it's following
a joke that you just made, the most softball
of a joke, and you're just waiting for your congregation
to bust out in laughter. I mean, just like, and
on the seventh day, the Lord said that he was
going to, something like that. Like, what are
you going to do? Just sit up there? Just let
it brew? You've got to excise it. You've got
to get those demons out of there. Does that mean
that every, you think of every public speaker,
if they take a break, is just like farting? I'm
sure there's a super cut of just people in the
middle of these discussions, these debates, and
just, in fact, I think there was one, if it wasn't
this election season, it was the first Trump
election season. Or I guess he's been in all
three. He's been in the past three. I don't know.
It was one of them. I don't think it was this
one. It was another one. But there was an audible
expulsion. And it was a big talking point for
a day until something else crazy happened. I'm
surprised that it took 24 hours for it to have
been old news. It might not have. It might not
have. I don't know. Also, for the record. I'm
sure you don't mean that it was egregious enough
that you would necessarily notice. But in my
head, I'm picturing a toddler whenever they just
look really focused on something and you know
that they're pooping themselves. That's what
I'm picturing for the pastor that you're talking
about. Am I going to hell for that? Quite possibly.
But that is one of the most... I had a good run.
That is one of the most jarring things that you'll
ever see is a toddler that is in the middle of
just doing something and then all of a sudden
scrunches up their face and then you get slapped
in the face by the smell of death from this perfect
creature. Or if you're a congregant in the middle
of hearing about Leviticus. Just fire and brimstone.
Just all of a sudden. Whoa. Whoa, this is a 4D
sermon. Ugh. Gross. Is that sulfur? It's like
the Rugrats movie. Rugrats go wild. They have
the little scratch and sniff thing. Oh, man.
Anyway. Anyway. Okay. Madam Web. Madam Web. Internet
meltdowns. Sermon farts. Internet meltdowns.
Sermon farts. See, you almost had me at like
Madam Web and internet meltdowns because they're
like things that went viral on the internet.
I mean, I guess sermon farts could be one too.
Things that go viral on the internet. Close.
That's my final answer. Close. That's where I'm
going. No, it's things that are not meant to
be funny. It's things that were intended for...
Like a serious tone, maybe like a sexy tone.
Which, by the way, out of context, quote -unquote
sexy things are ridiculous. And they're all hilarious.
I think in context, a lot of sexy things are
ridiculous. I mean, I guess it would depend on
how much you appreciate the person saying them.
But I think even if it's the person... the one
person in this world meant for you, I still think
that if you take something they said when they
were trying to be, show their admiration in one
sense or another, and you just put it in every
day, hey, so did you take out the trash today?
Oh, must have forgot. But you know what I was
thinking? I don't want you to finish that sentence.
I don't want to know what you were thinking.
I'm just going to put a stop to that. So not
viral moments. That would be ridiculous. And
this episode is going to be geared more towards
songs, either just complete out of pocket lines
that have no business being in the song or just
the entire song in general is just this song
did not have the intention that you wanted it
to. Okay. So one of the most, I think one of
the most popular examples of this is in Backstreet's
Back by the Backstreet Boys. You're stealing
mine. Okay. How dare you? Okay. No, no, that's
fine. That's fine. You can have that one because
I have another one that is also just as egregious.
Yeah. And this one I actually get the intent
of, unlike the Backstreet Boys one. But this
one is Spice Girls, Wannabe. Okay. If you want
to be my lover, you got to get with my friends.
I understand the intention behind it. The intention
is, hey, if we're going to work, then you have
to have great relationships with all my friends,
too. Sure. That's the weird part of that. Out
of context, you want to get with my friends.
If you want to be my lover, you got to get with
my friends. It just seems like she's inviting
him to an orgy. She only wants to be with homie
hoppers. That's unfortunate. That is a bold choice.
And that line has always bothered me. Even like,
well, that song came out probably like late 90s,
99, 98 maybe. But even then, hearing it, I just
thought that was such an odd line. I don't think
I've ever thought of that song in that context.
Of like that, I guess, particular. Little like
bit of lyrics. I mean, it totally makes sense
as a you have to have or a person that you're
dating has to get along with your friends. But
I can also very much see the orgy angle, I guess.
We come as a package deal. Boo! Oh, that was
a total accident. That was a total accident.
Uh -huh. Yeah, I'm going to have to marinate
with that one for a little bit. I don't think
Wannabe is going to play the same anymore. No.
But then there's also... So this would have been
around the same time that a song by Shania Twain
came out. And I remember this vividly. It's You're
Still the One. So it's a song with a woman. It's
about a woman and a man. And they're singing
about different aspects of their relationship.
And it should be a duet, but it's not. It's just
Shania Twain. But anyways, in the chorus, it's...
You're still the one I run to, blah, blah, blah,
blah. And the one that I belong to. But for I
don't know how many years, I thought it was the
woman I belong to. And so I was taken aback.
That this lesbian just had a country song on
the radio. I mean, who knows what she is these
days because it's all over the place. Am I behind
on the Shania Twain lore? Apparently Emily caught
the tail end of her being good before she just
went off the rails. I think she might be a little
better now because I think she might have gotten
some feedback saying, hey, let's tone it down
a little bit. Yeah, for a second there, she was
all over the place. Yeah, I guess I'll have to
do a little deep dive. Yeah, and also look into
her lesbianism on country radio in the late 90s,
which would be something to be proud of, because
I don't think there was anyone else that could
have done that. There was one singer who had
a hit song on country radio. Early 2000s, late
90s. Came out as a lesbian. Career completely
over. Hey, it's unintentionally funny. Probably
wasn't funny for her. That was the Rosemary's
granddaughter girl, right? Was it? I don't know.
I think so. She was a one -hit wonder. The song
she had was big. Like, it was big. And then just,
I'm a lesbian. Oh, never mind. Gone. I mean.
It's 2025. Beyonce can win country album of the
year. There are no rules. There are no rules.
Chapel Roan took the O out of country music.
Did you ever listen to Chapel Roan? Yeah. Have
you listened to The Giver, the country song she
put out? I heard it on SNL, and I think that
was the only time versus maybe some clips on
TikTok a couple times. Yeah. It's a... It's an
interesting one. It's a country lesbian anthem,
isn't it? It is, indeed. Yeah. Good for her.
See? Progress. I don't know how to look this
up, so my search history now includes country
music lesbian. Brandi Carlile is gay. What? You
didn't know that? No. I don't really listen to
a lot of Brandi Carlile. Me either. Not because
she's gay. Lesbian icon. Just because. Not my
jam. But it wasn't Brandi Carlile. Wilma Burgess.
Katie Lang. Katie Lang kind of sounds familiar.
That name sounds familiar. She's Canadian and
looks exactly how I would think she would. Shelly
Wright is her name. Shelly Wright. What was her
one song? If I could spell it right. Shelly Wright.
Single white female. which is funny because that's
about her putting an ad in the newspaper trying
to find a man. Oh, okay. Irony. Interesting.
Okay. I'll tell you what, the floor is yours.
Go ahead, take the Backstreet Boys. All right,
so the reason that we originally brought up the
topic of weird lyrics was because of one particular
thing that has always just sounded so bizarre
to me, and it's in Backstreet's Back. In the
song, it's a whole call and response thing. And
one of the lines is, am I sexual? Which is just
a strange thing to ask the homies. I say that
in my mirror every morning. If that's a question
that you have to ask, do you? I have to say yes
before I leave. You have to say yes? It's not,
yeah. You have to do the whole thing. Come on.
Yeah. Okay, fine. No, I'll... I'll try that.
Maybe that'll boost me up even higher tomorrow.
Yeah, you got to step up your game. But I've
never looked at my boys and even like, okay,
let me lay out a scenario for you. You're just,
you're getting ready for a date. You got some
guys over. Y 'all are just talking about it.
Y 'all are just shooting the breeze until it's
time for you to head out. And then you come up
to your fellas. You're like, hey, man. Do I look
good? Does this outfit work? Am I rocking this?
Those are fine. Those are fine. But then when
you cross the line, you know, I really like this
woman. I really hope it works out. I guess, like,
am I sexual? Do you think that's a conversation
that happens more in 2020? Is that something
that I'm exuding to the people around me? If
you didn't know me, would you look at me and
say, ooh, that guy is sexual? Yeah. It's never
happened. It's never happened. I want to know
what the writing process looks like. Well, I
can't speak for the Backstreet Boys, but it was
pretty similar. They had many similarities to
NSYNC. And NSYNC, their biggest hits were just
written by some Swedish dudes. Milli Vanilli?
Are they Swedish? Are they Swedish? They were
German? Something like that. I think they were
German. R .I .P. to Milli or Vanilli. One of
them. Or is it both of them now? Both. Both of
them? Yeah. R .I .P. to Millie and Vanilli. R
.I .P. to Millie and Vanilli. Moment of silence.
Okay. All right. So what's your next one? It's
just silly. It's silly. You're not asking your
boys, are you sexual? And your boys aren't responding
in unison. Am I sexual? Yeah. Okay. So this one.
This one. It has a funny backstory. I don't think
it really fits in a song that was meant to be
serious, but it is a song that is, it got radio
play, and it's confusing. And it's by Aerosmith.
You know what it is? Okay. It's Not Loving an
Elevator, which is also a good one that could
make this list. It's an Aerosmith song. I don't
know. Dude Looks Like a Lady. Okay. Don't worry.
Don't worry. I double checked. I am very curious
how you're going to handle this one. I double
checked. They didn't want to record it originally
because they didn't want to hurt the community.
But then the guy that co -wrote the song was
gay. And he was like, nah, it's cool. But the
backstory to it is... The original DEI. Yeah,
they just hired him so that they could sing this
song. The backstory to it is that... Aerosmith
walked into a bar where Vince Neil was patroning.
You know who Vince Neil is? Yeah, from Motley
Crue. And they only saw him from behind. And
someone said, that dude looks like a lady. So
this whole song is just clowning on Vince Neil
and how he looks like a woman from behind. That
is so funny. And going back through it, going
back through the lyrics and listening to it again.
I always assumed that it was like a hide -the
-snossage kind of situation. Like, the night's
going great, and then at the end of the night,
all of a sudden, you're having brats instead
of tacos, you know what I mean? But apparently
it's not. They just... I think for the edit,
that should be the little clip at the beginning
before the intro. It's a hide -the -snossages
situation. Oh, you got it. You got it. But no,
they... apparently in the song, the scenario
is that they walk up to this person they think
is a woman and then find out he is in fact a
man. And then whenever this man finds out that
they thought he was a woman, he pulls out a gun
on them. Every bit of like the research that
I've done for this episode has just reminded
me that I need to start reading the lyrics to
things a lot more carefully. You do. You do.
But you want your fun fact of the episode? It's
coming early. Ooh, what'd you get? It's like
Christmas in July. So, Dude Looks Like a Lady,
the classic by Aerosmith, is 4 minutes and 25
seconds long. There are 36 dudes in it. You know
what that comes out to? One dude every 7 .36
seconds. Is that a record -breaking number of
dudes? It's gotta be. It's gotta be. I don't
know another song unless it's just... I currently
cannot think of a single other song that uses
the word dude. Well, there you go. Except for
the Keenan and Kel one. He's a dude. She's a
dude. They're all dudes. Have you seen Good Burger
2? That's Keenan and Kel, right? No, it's Good
Burger. No. No? Have you seen Good Burger 1?
Yeah. But you haven't seen 2 yet? No. 2 is worth
the watch. I don't do the sequels. I don't like
sequels. 2 is worth the watch. That's good. I
believe you. And the guy, the leader of Mondo
Burger, just passed away. R .I .P. It's a guy
from Mondo Burger. He was a Chad. He was very
Chad -like. Do you have another song? Or do you
want me to roll into number three for me? I do.
Okay, go for it. So my next one is a one -off
because I don't listen to this artist very often.
This is from Feedback by Janet Jackson. And the
line is... Cause my swag is serious. Something
heavy, like a first day period, which is fantastic.
That is a great line. Weird choice. I don't know
that I would have gone with it, but I, so I was
having a conversation about this episode while
I was, I was looking into songs and I said this
particular line out loud. And the person that
I was having a conversation with goes gross.
And I was like, Oh yeah. Tell me why. Why is
it gross? It is gross. Why? Why is it gross?
Because as males, we're taught that periods are
disgusting. From birth, we're taught that. Be
glad you don't have to deal with this. You were
taught from birth that periods are disgusting.
Yeah, through media. We're taught to stay away
from blood. It could be tainted. We grew up on
the tail end of the AIDS epidemic. So we're told
to stay away from blood, and all of a sudden,
once a month, all these women are just spraying
it out all over the place? I'm sorry. What do
you mean, all of the sudden? Do you think periods
were invented in the 90s? I'm just saying that
post -HIV AIDS... Blood became a lot more dangerous.
And so we're taught, rightfully so, as we should
be, that hey, if there's blood, you need gloves.
There's nothing that happens to me regularly
that I need to have gloves at the ready for.
What? Do you think we use gloves? I would hope
so. That's gross. Your poor fiance. On one end
of the spectrum. Are there gloves regularly stocked
in your home? You live with a woman. Yeah, I
mean, if I needed gloves, I could find gloves.
Yeah. But I don't have anything to do with that
part. Because... Doesn't make it gross. Because
Adam isn't the one that ate the apple. You can
thank Eve for that. So... Checkmate. Uh -huh.
You know what? I... I don't know. I don't know
what... What was the line again? What was the
Jan Jack line? Swag so serious. Because my swag
is serious. Something heavy like a first aid
period. Is that serious swag? Or that it's heavy?
It's just that it's heavy. Oh, okay. Well, I
mean, I don't know. It's a heavy flow. I don't...
I'm not a fan of that. You pitched this episode.
This is the natural progression of things. If
I have an open wound and it is flowing heavily,
I'm going to the doctor. Hold on. So a couple
points to that. First of all, gaping wound. I
mean, yeah, what else are you going to heavily
flow from? Again, your poor fiance. What else
are you going to heavily flow from? Me as a man,
what else would I have to compare that to? Could
have called it a hatchet wound, but I didn't.
I stayed above. I didn't go low. I went high.
Stayed on the high road. Are you high right now?
But then you brought me back down. Good Lord.
So heavy, heavy flow. Anyway, it's a great line.
Heavy flow. I guess that means everything's working
great. So that's a good thing. I mean, it means
you're not pregnant. So that is a matter of perspective.
Oh, okay. Well, if that's what you're aiming
for, then kudos. But I don't. have any point
of reference for this and never have and god
willing never will yeah sure i do have two daughters
i'm just saying so we're gonna get a lot of gloves
in doesn't make it you're about to experience
the pink tax oh gross all right the pink tax
is gross i agree yeah have you ever heard the
song captain jack It's not the one by Lonely
Island where Michael Bolton is Captain Jack Sparrow.
No, I have not. No? It's a song. No, that is
a great song. It is a great song. It's a song
about a child, a teenager, who's still trying
to find his way in this world, who might or might
not be addicted to heroin. We don't know. Could
be meth. It's something. Could be crack. Probably
not coke. Coke seems a little too light for how
the song goes, but one of the lines in this song
is, your sister's gone out, she's on a date,
you just sit at home and masturbate. And the
first time you hear this song, it just punches
you in the face. I sincerely dislike that they
named this song Captain Jack. Captain Jack is
the street name for the drug. Captain Jack will
get you by tonight. He'll take you to a special
island. Captain Jack will get you high tonight.
Just a little push and you'll be flying. Okay.
And then there's also a line about one of the
reasons that you can infer that this child is
addicted to Captain Jack is because his... father
was found face down in their swimming pool so
it's a very heavy song but then all of a sudden
you're just slapped in the face with this kid
that's high as balls just going to town so on
your to -do list you know captain jack by billy
joel it's billy joel it's billy joel yes captain
jack by billy joel the first time i heard this
song it was uh on sirius xm He was doing like
this special thing, I think, because he was starting
to tour again. And so there was a channel that
was just dedicated to his music or music that
he curated. So other people knew music that he
picked. And I found a lot of great Billy Joel
songs that I had no idea existed. And this was
one of them. And that's a great song. It's real
catchy. It's no piano, man. I don't think you're
going to get a bar of people together to sing
Captain Jack. There is potential there for it,
though. It depends how many harmonica solos are
in Captain Jet. I don't think there's any. I
think it's harmonica -less. Disappointing. Yeah,
I know. Tragic. Might have thrown off the vibe
of the song even more so than Masturbate. In
trying to find... That's the last time I'll say
Masturbate. In trying to find lyrics. Okay, now
I'm done. In trying to find lyrics that fit the
specific vibe that I was going for, I was having
so much trouble trying to find things that weren't
just weird, but in a weirdly sexual way. I was
trying to find things that just felt really bizarre.
One of the things that I hate the most about
one specific country song, it's a thing that
I just will never not think is weird. is eric
church's drink in my hand and there's a line
in the song where eric church goes um you got
that little tattoo playing peeky boo on your
back and hearing a grown man say the word peeky
boo is jarring every single time i cannot stand
that song and it is for the dumbest of reasons
it's just it's ridiculous and like i was trying
to find more things that are like that kind of
weird But in like looking up different like avenues
and stuff for like I looked in a couple like
Reddit threads and was just like scrolling through
my Spotify and stuff trying to like recall lyrics.
But so many of them were just like very weird,
horny things. I guess that's where like a lot
of creativity comes from. Maybe. I don't know.
Like there is. I don't know. We might have to
censor this one. There's a line in Act Up by
City Girls where it just says, f***y pink, breast
cancer. That's a thing that you thought of. That's
a thing you thought of. Put to paper. What does
that mean? And then recorded. There weren't...
I don't know. Like awareness? Like... Does that
have to do with breast cancer awareness? Their
color is pink? I don't... Yeah, no, it's a breast
cancer awareness thing, but... I wouldn't think
that adjective before pink... Would be a very
good descriptor because I think that there's
all shades of that certain part of the anatomy.
But yeah, maybe it's like a light pink for breast
cancer awareness. Hold on. Did you just call
the word pussy an adjective? In reference to
pink, yeah. Because that's the type of pink.
It's describing the noun of pink. No, it's not.
Yes, it is. It is not. What? What is the subject
of that sentence? Pussy. I don't like that I
just said that out loud. What would pink be?
Are you saying pink is the adjective? The adjective.
It's not, though. It's the adjective describing
it is, too. Because it's a type of pink. It's
not. In this instance, it is. Like breast cancer
awareness. It is not. Give me the line one more
time. I'm looking up the actual full lyric to
this thing first. Because I think I'm right on
this. You're not. I will consult Chad GPT if
I need to. You know what? If this is a thing
that's going to make it into the episode, which
I'm not confident that it is, give us your thoughts
in the comments. Tell us what part of speech.
Like a sickly green. A sickly green. Sickly isn't
the noun. Sickly is the adjective to the noun
that is green. You're not describing the color
pink. Pink is the descriptor. For the thing before
it. No. If it had been the other way around,
if pink was first, then you would be describing
the other word. Okay, but that would... Tell
me I'm wrong. I am telling you that you're wrong
actively. Okay, so flip the words. Which is fine.
Flip the two words. Flip the two words and then
repeat the line. Pink f***y breast cancer. Okay.
Which is a completely different vibe, first of
all, if you say that the other way. So in that
instance, isn't pink the adjective to the word
after it? Because the pink is describing the
thing? Yeah, of course. Okay. That doesn't mean
that if you don't flip them around, they're different.
Oh my gosh. That's not how this works. Can we
get some English scholars in here, please? Because
I think I'm right. You know what? Like I said,
if this goes to the... If this makes it into
the actual final episode, let us know in the
comments which of those statements is right.
I'll probably. Which one of us is right? It's
definitely making it in. I'll probably just chop
off the first part of the word. But I just want
everyone to know that I made it through this
entire conversation without any vulgarities.
You, on the other hand, did not. You said it
like nine times. I never do. I have no regrets.
No regerts. No regrets. Anyway. What's your definition
of irony? Parts of speech aside, I adopted a
child from overseas to save him from child labor
factories, and on his very first birthday, we
went to Build -A -Bear workshop. That is ironic
that you would save a child from a situation
just to bring them back here, and instead of
giving them a life of relaxation and luxury,
you just put them back into making the same thing
that they were making over there. That is irony.
Good job. Thank you, Bo Burnham. It's an opposite
outcome than what was expected, right? That's
how we could... Sure. We could parse that down.
Okay. I assume you know where this is going.
Rain on your wedding day. No, what do you got?
Irony. I mean, I don't... I have a problem with
that song. That's just unfortunate. That's not
irony. Yeah. Would you expect? I feel like that's
the entirety of the song. It's just... Well,
here's where the conspiracy comes in. Maybe the
entire irony of the song is that the whole time
you're expecting to hear irony, but you don't.
You just hear about people in bad situations.
So it's just meta? 10 ,000 spoons when all you
need is a knife. Like, that's not irony. That's
just unfortunate. I think that's kind of ironic.
You have so much silverware and none of the one
thing you need. But, okay. I think that's kind
of it. I'll give you that. But I think that in
order for these to be ironic, you have to know
the context around everything. Like, what's the
first line? Man, like, 98. Wins the lottery and
dies the next day. Okay. That's not irony. The
guy buys one ticket. and he wins and then dies,
that's not irony. What would make it ironic is
if he had spent all those 98 years buying lottery
tickets, and then he dies as soon as he wins.
That would be irony. But you don't know the context
around all these situations. Okay, so in that
case, wouldn't you use context clues to make
them ironic? Maybe she's just making you work
a little bit harder for the premise. That's not
my job. I don't think that's necessarily a bad
thing. Don't get me wrong. I don't like that
song. I'm here to chill. And I don't like it
a lot because it's ridiculous. But I do think
there are some semblances of irony or where you
can connect the dots yourself. You could. I'm
not a big Alanis Morissette person. The one that
preaches dogma? I do love the movie Dogma. It
is one of my favorites. Wordplay. And she's literally...
I would accept her as God. She's literally God.
But you're just not that big of a fan. Of her
music? No. Of her role in Dogma? Also kind of
no. Because Snape is the bigger part of any scene
that she's in. That's fair. How do you feel about
Hand in My Pocket? Do you have any feelings towards
that one? It's fine. Yeah. Okay. She also dated
Ryan Reynolds, so... We know that her... They
were married, weren't they? Or was it... No,
he married Scarlett Johansson. Yeah, I think
they were engaged, and then he broke up with
her to get with ScarJo, I think. And then cheated
on ScarJo with Blake Lively. Noticing a pattern.
You got another one? My next one is a song that
was used in a movie recently. It's called MacArthur
Park. It is, I believe, by Donna Summer. I thought
I wrote that down, but I don't have it on here.
And the movie that it was used recently in was
Beetlejuice. Or, I guess, more specifically,
Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice. Oh, yeah, that's Jurassic
Park is frightening in the dark. All the dinosaurs
are running wild. Yes. That's all I could think
of when they were doing the whole song. Just
the weird out Jurassic Park song. The parody
is better than the original, but in the actual
song, like I understand kind of what they're
going for with this particular set of lyrics,
but it's just, it's not, not good. It's real
heavy handed. The line is someone left my cake
out in the rain. I don't think I can take it
because it took too long to bake it and I'll
never have the recipe again. I understand where
the metaphor analogy, like I understand what
they're trying to get at. But it's just, it's
awkward. Does an analogy use like or as? Not
a metaphor, does it? That's a simile. Oh. I don't
know. I'm done arguing parts of speech with you.
Sounds not technically a part of speech. Anyway.
Yeah, so I don't, I don't like that line. I don't
like that, like, part of the lyrics because it's
just not, it's not good. Someone let T -Rex out
of his pen. It's been a while. Have you heard
that they're making another Jurassic Park? Yes,
with ScarJo. I am tired of Jurassic Park movies.
There was a whole trilogy and then there was
a whole trilogy with Chris Bratt. You call him
Chris Bratt? Why? Chris Bratt. Oh. Not Brad.
Maybe an overcooked rodent. Like an overcooked
rodent, yes. Chris Brad. Yeah. And then Bryce
Dallas Howard. Word on the street is that she
got her middle name based on where she was conceived.
Whoop, whoop. Let me hear it for the 214. Which,
do you think they were actually in like, I don't
know, like, Oak Cliff. I couldn't name her Bryce
Oak Cliff Howard. I mean, is Oak Cliff considered
its own city? Yeah. Oh, I didn't know that. Yeah,
I think it's its own place on the outskirts of
Dallas. Also, I feel like you picked the bigger
thing in the Metroplex, the catchier one. Like,
if it was Fort Worth or Crowley, I don't think
those really make as much sense. Yeah, I don't
know. I don't know. You a big fan of the Beatles?
I have a feeling I picked the same one on this
one. And I do really like the Beatles. Yeah?
I do really like the Beatles. Alright, on the
count of three, we'll name the song that we picked.
Ready? One, two, three. I am the walrus. How'd
you know? Because I am the egg man. They are
the Eggman. I am the walrus. Which is just an
objectively funnier thing to say than to actually
sing. That entire album is just such nonsense.
There is a Family Guy cutaway specifically talking
about this. And it's talking about how Ringo
got to... Got to put this song forward because
he's a time traveler. They're like, how is this
song? And he's like, well, you know, it's great,
but I don't think it's going to be good on a
compact disc. They're like, what's a compact
disc? Are you from the future, Ringo? Yes, and
I outlive two of you. The Beatles. All right.
So whenever we made this a topic possibility
on our list, we specifically mentioned Am I Sexual
by BSB. But then we also put in Marky Mark and
the Funky Bunch. What was this song called? Wild?
Wild Side. Wild Thing? Wild Side. Wild Side,
yeah. And for the life of me, I don't know why.
I went through the lyrics, and it's just a real
bummer of a song about inner -city America and
the drugs and how it turns people that could
have had a future into bums, and then at the
end a little girl gets killed. So I went through
the lyrics, and I was like, I don't know why
this made the list, but I did find one little
nugget of something that could pertain to this
episode. There's a line in it that said, She
wanted to be a chemical engineer making $50 ,000
to $55 ,000 a year. Chemical engineer making
$50 ,000 to $55 ,000. Ouch. Yeah. You're going
to need a backup plan, lady. As far as silly
lyrics, that's all I've got. All right. My last
big one that I had as far as the weird lyrics
go is She -Wolf by Shakira. To which she uses
the line, I'm starting to feel abused like a
coffee machine in an office. Which Shakira has
been famous for roughly forever. I don't feel
like she's been a party to a coffee machine in
an office. Maybe not. Maybe I'm not giving Shakira
enough credit. You know what she, it didn't abuse
her, but she abused it. The Internal Revenue
Service. Tragic. Was it the IRS or was it, where's
she from? Columbia? Brazil? Columbia, yeah. Was
it their tax system? Either way, she got popped
for tax fraud, and then the story just went away.
So wishing all the best to Shakira and her tax
situation. So you said you don't have anything
left, right? I had one more segment, but if you've
got more for this, then go for it. It's not for
this. I had a separate thing. There's a particular
artist who has just hit. boatload of odd choices
in his lyrics I did skip a good amount of them
for the same reasons that I said earlier that
I would like to keep this at least relatively
family friendly and most of the things that were
on his like were in his lyrics that were off
color or were just straight up incredibly problematic
Kanye West I skipped over a good amount of them
especially of the things that have come out since
he has titled himself Yay. Because I did listen
to his newest songs just out of I guess curiosity.
I deeply regret contributing to any of the listens
on either of those songs. It's something. It's
deeply sad. Don't recommend it. It's something.
cousins and world war three i did hear about
the cousin stuff yeah uh it's it's a lot uh it's
very clearly just a man in the deep deep throes
of mental illness that's a lot uh a lot sadder
than i would like to get into at the moment so
instead i just had a rapid fire list of some
of the nonsense things that have been in kanye
west's earlier works shoot in a french -ass restaurant
Give me my damn croissant. Fantastic lyric. Hold
on. Incredible line. Actually, let me cut in
real quick. I recently exposed my children to
Yvonne. That's a fantastic name. Can I have your
number? My little croissant. The back of your
head is ridiculous. And that is something that
the kids also say. We'll work that up, too. Can
you, did you feel the Kinergy today? And, hey,
Daddy? Yeah. I got something to tell you. Okay.
The back of your head is ridiculous. I so badly
just want them to regularly ask you where your
boyfriend at. Can you get me Mike and Ike's?
Oh, what's the other one? Oh, yeah, whatever.
Whenever I pick up. Whenever I pick her up from
school and her hair is up, I say, girl, you're
working that up, dude. Anyways, continue. But
yeah, that one's a fantastic line. Fan least
favorite on both the show and just kind of in
general these days. On a song he did with Katy
Perry, he has the line, pockets on Shrek, rockets
on deck. Tell me what's next. Alien sex? What?
What are pockets on Shrek? I guess he just wanted
to know if that fancy vest he was wearing had
pockets. That alligator leather vest. Alligator
leather, yeah. Okay. Pockets on Shrek. Rockets
on deck. Tell me what's next. Alien sex? And
my absolute favorite. Thing that Kanye has done.
Not for the quality. But it is just one of the
funniest. Most ridiculous things. That I've listened
to. And that would be. Kanye West's verse on.
This ain't a scene. It's an arms race. A fallout
boy song. That quite frankly needed. Zero Kanye
West. I don't know what the hell this song is
talking about. Do you? For the uninitiated. Because
I went through. The world's biggest fallout boy
phase. I'm just going to spoken word read all
of his verse in this song. It's very funny to
me. But you have to do the echoes too. That's
what you're here for. Oh, okay. Proceed. Now,
I don't know what the hell this song's talking
about. Do you? Do you? She said, yeah, I've been
spending all day trying to figure that out. You
too? You too? The arms race made a raise the
arms race straight to the top. Who knew? Who
knew? Right now, they got the number one spot.
Do you want that? Me too. Hashtag me too. One
thing I gotta call out, boy. Take a look at Fallout,
boy. Since they ain't black, when they get they
money, they don't just ball out, boy. They just
buy tight jeans till they nothing out. All out,
boy. They figure, yay, dress in tight so we gon'
dress tighter. He dress white so we gon' dress
whiter. And that's how he says it, too. So in
spite of anything you might have seen or heard,
this scene occurred. Word. Incredible. Bars.
The best lyricism there has just ever been. I
still know that word. Bars. And I can't tell
you the last time I heard that song. I forgot
that it existed until I was having, like I said,
a conversation about this episode. I brought
up some, like, ridiculous Kanye West lyric, and
I swear I just had, like, the Jimmy Neutron flashback.
The cells in my brain were just like, do you
remember? The neurons were going crazy. And so,
yeah, that was the last of the absolutely amazing
thing that Kanye West added to this scene. It's
an arms race. All right. Well, you want to play
a quick little game? Ooh, yes. Okay. I've got
ridiculous titles. Of songs. You give me the
artist. Okay. So here's a layup. Mbop. Hanson?
Hanson. Okay. Now we've gone up two notches on
difficulty now. London beckons songs about money
written by machines. Fall Out Boy. Wrong. Panic.
Panic at the Disco. I've got a dark alley and
a bad idea that says you should shut your mouth.
That one's Fall Out Boy. Fall Out Boy. Tell that
Mick he just made my list of things to do today.
Don't know that one. Fall Out Boy. Oh. And these
lyrics. Okay, Mbop is in the song. And another
one is in the song. But the rest of these, no
mention in the song whatsoever. There is... I
think there is a steady decline of both Fall
Out Boy and Panic! at the Disco music. And I
think it specifically happened whenever they
started giving their songs legitimate titles.
Actual titles? If you listen to anything that
is in From Under the Cork Tree, anything from
Beaver You Can't Sweat Out? Yeah, because I looked
it up today and what is the second Panic album?
One with like Nine in the Afternoon. Pretty odd.
Yes. That song, most of the titles are on point.
Like they actually have something to do with
the song. Their first one, no way. Fall Out Boy,
they made it like three albums. before they started
being sensical again to be fair uh when it came
to fallout boy they are the ones who like started
panic like they're the ones that like gave them
their kind of like jumping off point i guess
yeah and so i think the first album that panic
did was them trying to be fallout boy because
they were owned by the same label so fueled by
ramen did every emo thing in the early 2000s
Every, like, that particular brand of emo. So,
like, Fall Out Boy, Gym Class Heroes. Trivy McCoy?
Paramore, I think. Yes. And, like, I constantly
thank God for Esteban. Great song. Nonsense title.
They're just, they're all, they're all great.
A little less 16 Candles, a little more... Touch
Me? Touch Me, yeah. I think. Dance Dance and
Sugar We're Going Down are the only ones that
have any kind of semblance of connection to the
songs that are in them. And those two were radio
hits. So maybe they wised up. All right. This
one, I don't know if you're going to know this
one or not, but it's mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm. What?
Yeah. M -M -M space M -M -M space M -M -M space
M -M -M. No idea. If you heard the song, you'd
know it. It's by the Crash Test Dummies. Very,
very recognizable song at any point. Sing it
for me. Once there was this girl who wouldn't,
didn't want to change with the girls in the change
room. But when they made her, they saw birthmarks
all over her body. That's exactly how it sounds.
That is the most, that is the greatest impression
of that song you were ever going to hear. That's
exactly. what it sounds like. And the chorus
of the song is just... That's the entire chorus.
I know that I've heard of the crash test dummies,
but I don't know anything by them. Look up this
song. It'll be stuck in your head for forever.
Of course, they're from Manitoba. And then last
one on this list is, there's a good reason these
tables are numbered, honey. You just haven't
thought of it yet. You just haven't thought of
it yet. oh yeah it's god why can i not tell the
good old panic yeah yeah that's um please leave
all overcoats canes and top hats from that moment
you'll be out of place and underdressed yeah
but with the conclusion of my fun game that's
all i got all right that is a that little last
part was a blast from the past i haven't listened
to panic or fallout boy in a well In a minute.
All you out there, check out Crash Test Dummies.
That one song. I will. And also Wild Side. And
there was another one that you mentioned that
I don't remember at this point. Let me go through
my notes. Dude Looks Like a Lady. Captain Jack.
Captain Jack, yeah. And also maybe Dude Looks
Like a Lady because you said there was 36 dudes?
36 in 4 minutes and 25 seconds. That's too many
dudes. 7 .65 seconds. 7 .36 seconds per dude.
Song math. That's what you're in for when you
listen to the Cash Exchange. Follow us on Instagram,
X, Facebook, TikTok. Leave us a review and listen
to us on Apple Music, Spotify, or wherever you
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Cash Exchange Podcast, TikTok, The Cash Exchange
Podcast, Twitter, Cash Exchange Pod, and Gmail.
cashexchangepod at gmail .com. And with that,
do you have any closing thoughts? I have a message
for Alanis Morissette. If I'm listening to your
song, or for any artist really, if I'm listening
to your song, put all the information I need
in the song, unless it's something historical.
So like if it's We Didn't Start the Fire, another
shout out to Billy Joel, those all have points
of reference that I can look up outside. of this
song. But if the song is completely contained
within your lyrics, put in the work. Maybe. I
know this song is like 30 -something years old,
but just think about that next time. My brain
short -circuited when you said that song was
30 -something years old. I know that's a technically
factual thing. That's crazy. My closing thoughts
are... Feel the Kinergy today. And if you're
not, figure out why you're not. And then tomorrow,
wake up, look in the mirror, ask yourself, am
I sexual? And then, there you go. Hopefully a
chorus of angels will come up behind you, giving
you the affirmation that you need to walk out
that door and grab that Kinergy by the horns.
And remember, guys, the back of your head is
ridiculous. All right. We'll see you next time.
Peace out, Girl Scouts.