1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:14,000 Yo, I'd like to welcome everybody back to a brand new episode of the Cognitive for Large 2 00:00:14,000 --> 00:00:15,000 podcast. 3 00:00:15,000 --> 00:00:17,000 I am your host, Quentin Golden. 4 00:00:17,000 --> 00:00:22,000 But, friends and family call me QG for short, and if you show like that's what we'll be 5 00:00:22,000 --> 00:00:26,000 coming through these podcasts, you can call me that too. 6 00:00:26,000 --> 00:00:29,000 And this is episode three, man. 7 00:00:29,000 --> 00:00:36,000 I'm surprised I'm being so consistent with the podcast thing because I like to do a 8 00:00:36,000 --> 00:00:37,000 little bit of everything. 9 00:00:37,000 --> 00:00:41,000 So I might do some shit for like a month and be super into it. 10 00:00:41,000 --> 00:00:45,000 Like, I don't know, build a model train or some shit like that. 11 00:00:45,000 --> 00:00:49,000 And then I'll lose interest in that shit and then I'll just start researching something 12 00:00:49,000 --> 00:00:50,000 deeply for like a month. 13 00:00:50,000 --> 00:00:55,000 And then once I feel like I know as much as I want to know about it, or I lose interest 14 00:00:55,000 --> 00:00:56,000 in it, I go, man. 15 00:00:56,000 --> 00:00:57,000 I'm going to some other shit. 16 00:00:57,000 --> 00:01:04,000 The only thing in my life that's been consistent as far as hobbies are concerned is music. 17 00:01:04,000 --> 00:01:10,000 And I guess now that I'm producing beats and engineering, like, I think I'm so intrigued 18 00:01:10,000 --> 00:01:13,000 by that because I don't know everything about it. 19 00:01:13,000 --> 00:01:17,000 So it gives me a chance like to learn something new and, you know, consistently work at it, 20 00:01:17,000 --> 00:01:19,000 see if I can get better at it. 21 00:01:19,000 --> 00:01:24,000 And that intrigue, like that intrigue, it makes me want to keep pushing forward to see 22 00:01:24,000 --> 00:01:27,000 how so I can take it. 23 00:01:27,000 --> 00:01:32,000 So this week has been dope, actually. 24 00:01:32,000 --> 00:01:38,000 Man, the past shit almost a month has just been dope. 25 00:01:38,000 --> 00:01:43,000 I've been spending more time alone. 26 00:01:43,000 --> 00:01:50,000 I wouldn't call it soul searching necessarily, but just, you know, evaluating the things that 27 00:01:50,000 --> 00:01:56,000 I do, the people around me trying to figure out what do I truly enjoy. 28 00:01:56,000 --> 00:02:03,000 And it's been an adventure, man, one that I'm loving, actually, you know. 29 00:02:03,000 --> 00:02:10,000 I've been through, you know, shit in my life where I'll go through, like, peaks and valleys 30 00:02:10,000 --> 00:02:17,000 and the peaks and valleys would be like, you know, a regular type of thing, but lately 31 00:02:17,000 --> 00:02:23,000 I'm on all peaks. And usually when that type of shit happens to me, like, I start to think 32 00:02:23,000 --> 00:02:29,000 about Mercy's Law. And if you don't know what Mercy Law is, it's the law that says anything 33 00:02:29,000 --> 00:02:32,000 that can go bad will go bad. 34 00:02:32,000 --> 00:02:37,000 And for the longest time, like, I moved around with that mindset. 35 00:02:37,000 --> 00:02:43,000 So if something good was happening for me in my head, I would just start preparing for, like, 36 00:02:43,000 --> 00:02:50,000 a downfall. What can be toxic in, like, any type of relationship you have, if that's a 37 00:02:50,000 --> 00:02:55,000 friendship or if it's, like, a person you date, because energy is real. 38 00:02:55,000 --> 00:02:59,000 And when you give off that energy, like, you're expecting something to go bad, people will 39 00:02:59,000 --> 00:03:03,000 feel it, recognize it. Even if they don't recognize it, they'll feel it. 40 00:03:03,000 --> 00:03:09,000 And that could alter how they look at the situation or, you know, how close y'all can get 41 00:03:09,000 --> 00:03:15,000 to it. But it might actually push y'all apart. So I've been trying to avoid that. 42 00:03:15,000 --> 00:03:21,000 I think another reason why I'm in such a good mood lately is that it's finally starting to 43 00:03:21,000 --> 00:03:28,000 feel like fall, which is by far my favorite season. And my birthday is in the summertime. 44 00:03:28,000 --> 00:03:36,000 My birthday is in July, and I fucking hate this. It's too hot. It's too many people. 45 00:03:36,000 --> 00:03:41,000 I don't know. I just pass. I pass in the summer. 46 00:03:41,000 --> 00:03:48,000 The wintertime is cool, but then sometime it's too cold. Spring is okay, but it rains a 47 00:03:48,000 --> 00:03:53,000 lot. And I actually enjoy the rain. It might be my favorite weather, but that's all contingent 48 00:03:53,000 --> 00:03:59,000 on if I have anything scheduled to do. If I'm, like, if I'm just free, it's just all 49 00:03:59,000 --> 00:04:03,000 leisure time. I love the rain. I like how it sounds. I like the way the rain smells. 50 00:04:03,000 --> 00:04:09,000 Like, I enjoy the rain, but when it comes to the fall, perfect weather. Not too hot, 51 00:04:09,000 --> 00:04:16,000 not too cold. Put a little hoodie on, put a jacket on. Football is on. I like to see 52 00:04:16,000 --> 00:04:24,000 the leaves change, like, you know. And my favorite holiday is in the fall, which would be 53 00:04:24,000 --> 00:04:29,000 Halloween. Thanksgiving is cool, but I like Halloween. And the reason being, besides the fact 54 00:04:29,000 --> 00:04:34,000 that I'm into, like, spooky shit and all that type of shit, I feel like Halloween might 55 00:04:34,000 --> 00:04:42,000 be the only holiday that's true to its origins. You know what I mean? Like, think about something 56 00:04:42,000 --> 00:04:49,000 like Easter. And that's supposed to be, you know, a celebration of the return of Jesus Christ 57 00:04:49,000 --> 00:04:55,000 if that's your belief system. And through the years, now it has to do with rabbits and 58 00:04:55,000 --> 00:05:00,000 fucking eggs being decorated. I don't even know the correlation between that. And then 59 00:05:00,000 --> 00:05:04,000 you take it to something like Thanksgiving and it's like, oh, it's a celebration of people 60 00:05:04,000 --> 00:05:08,000 from a far land meeting the indigenous people of here. They're going to share meal as a 61 00:05:08,000 --> 00:05:14,000 family. And they gave them niggas smallpox. And when it comes to Christmas, like, it's 62 00:05:14,000 --> 00:05:20,000 more so to deal with the pagans and, yo, that's a lot with that shit. If you want to take the 63 00:05:20,000 --> 00:05:26,000 time to research it and like ruin your childhood and other shit, do it. I've done it and it 64 00:05:26,000 --> 00:05:32,000 will play. You know what I mean? Like, but Halloween, I love it. I like the creepiness 65 00:05:32,000 --> 00:05:38,000 of it. It's fucking candy and so that's dope. You get to wear masks, dress up, be who you 66 00:05:38,000 --> 00:05:44,000 want to be, even if it's just for a night. And I think if people did that more consistently, 67 00:05:44,000 --> 00:05:50,000 I think they will be overall more happy. But, you know, living in a society where anything 68 00:05:50,000 --> 00:05:57,000 outside of the norm is like zillified or like is demonized, no pun intended. And I mean, 69 00:05:57,000 --> 00:06:02,000 but on Halloween, shit, be what you want to be. Like, you know, if you're a female and 70 00:06:02,000 --> 00:06:08,000 like, you know, you're super reserved and everything is all business, you dress like Hillary Clinton 71 00:06:08,000 --> 00:06:13,000 and shit, yo, you can go be like a fucking slutty nurse and make a zombie slutty nurse 72 00:06:13,000 --> 00:06:23,000 if you want to put some swag on it. Halloween is fire, man. I love it. I mean, oh man, I'm 73 00:06:23,000 --> 00:06:31,000 just in a good fucking mood, man. I'm just in a good mood. Oh, so again, this shit is 74 00:06:31,000 --> 00:06:35,000 so scat-a-brain, so I'm going to do that a lot while I just jump from shit to shit. 75 00:06:35,000 --> 00:06:42,000 So get used to it, that's just what I'm going to do. But I was talking to my best friend 76 00:06:42,000 --> 00:06:46,000 and shit and we sitting there and I don't even know what he was talking about. But then 77 00:06:46,000 --> 00:06:52,000 he kind of brought up this thing that he learned. So he put me on the game about the four H's 78 00:06:52,000 --> 00:07:00,000 and the four H's applies to relationships, more so like intimate relationships. So if 79 00:07:00,000 --> 00:07:06,000 you have a partner and you see the day upset or they might seem a little off from what 80 00:07:06,000 --> 00:07:13,000 their normal day-to-day is, you know, you know your partner. He was like, yo, he said you 81 00:07:13,000 --> 00:07:19,000 got to approach him and there's four H's, four questions that you have to ask. Yo, do you 82 00:07:19,000 --> 00:07:26,000 need help? Do you need to be held? Do you need to be heard? Or do you need to be hunked? 83 00:07:26,000 --> 00:07:31,000 And if those four things can fix your situation, you might need to go to like couple therapy 84 00:07:31,000 --> 00:07:35,000 or some shit. And when he told me that shit, like I said back and I thought about it, I'm 85 00:07:35,000 --> 00:07:41,000 like, yo, that's some real ass shit. It really is. Really take the time to think about it. 86 00:07:41,000 --> 00:07:46,000 If your partner is upset, go to him and go, yo, do you need help with something? Hey, 87 00:07:46,000 --> 00:07:51,000 do you just need a hug? You need to be held right now? Because sometimes that's all you 88 00:07:51,000 --> 00:07:55,000 need. That human connection that touched like, you know what I mean? Because this energy 89 00:07:55,000 --> 00:08:00,000 transfer, so then it's like, all right, maybe you got some shit on your mind and you just 90 00:08:00,000 --> 00:08:04,000 think nobody understands you. So yo, do you need to be heard? Tell me what's on your mind. 91 00:08:04,000 --> 00:08:11,000 Let me hear you out. Or, you know what I mean? You might just need some, some humping. 92 00:08:11,000 --> 00:08:17,000 Humping is funny. I like that. I like saying humping. Like that shit is funny. And I like 93 00:08:17,000 --> 00:08:22,000 saying like wiener. Yeah, I mean, so like, I never referred to like my dick is a dick. 94 00:08:22,000 --> 00:08:29,000 I just like, I got to go piss, man. I wouldn't have had to put out my wiener. You know what 95 00:08:29,000 --> 00:08:36,000 I mean? The wiener is just a good word. I like that shit. Yeah, speaking of, well, not speaking 96 00:08:36,000 --> 00:08:44,000 of wieners, but I thought about this shit the other day. I fucking hate pornos. I don't 97 00:08:44,000 --> 00:08:54,000 like it. I don't like it. I think because I overthink everything. When I, when I've looked 98 00:08:54,000 --> 00:09:01,000 at pornos, especially like in the past years, I find myself feeling bad for the lady that's 99 00:09:01,000 --> 00:09:12,000 in the porno. Hear me out. It's like, I go, yo, what, what led you to this? Why was 100 00:09:12,000 --> 00:09:18,000 this your, your past, your career path? Like why? I mean, did you not have the light up 101 00:09:18,000 --> 00:09:25,000 hanging? Were you so, you know, restricted where you couldn't like, you know, wear certain 102 00:09:25,000 --> 00:09:30,000 things or express yourself, I guess in a sexual way, but not so much sexual. I don't mean 103 00:09:30,000 --> 00:09:37,000 it like that. Like just be expressive and I don't know, whatever, whatever your reasons 104 00:09:37,000 --> 00:09:45,000 may be, like it led to this young camera just getting humped by just land of wieners. And 105 00:09:45,000 --> 00:09:54,000 it's like, damn, that's your life. That sucks, man. Because everybody has a history, obviously, 106 00:09:54,000 --> 00:10:00,000 but I don't want to be able to Google your shit. You know what I mean? And then let's 107 00:10:00,000 --> 00:10:07,000 say, all right, you get out of shape or they find the next version of you or better version 108 00:10:07,000 --> 00:10:11,000 of you and they kick you to the curb. Now it's just like, all right, I got to fucking 109 00:10:11,000 --> 00:10:20,000 figure out life. And then you got to try to go, you know, get a nine to five. Or now you 110 00:10:20,000 --> 00:10:25,000 just start like the only fans of some shit and just hold on to whatever built in fan base 111 00:10:25,000 --> 00:10:29,000 you got. But let's say you do start a nine to five and you want to have a family. Yo, 112 00:10:29,000 --> 00:10:35,000 that's the conversation that you got to have with your partner. Hey, I used to fuck for 113 00:10:35,000 --> 00:10:41,000 money legally. You know what I mean? And then, you know, let's say you do end up getting 114 00:10:41,000 --> 00:10:44,000 married, not even married. You just end up in a relationship where you have you have 115 00:10:44,000 --> 00:10:49,000 a kid and then you got to go to like a PTA meeting and I don't have kids. I'm not really 116 00:10:49,000 --> 00:10:55,000 sure PTA meetings work and I don't really remember the ones my parents came to. But 117 00:10:55,000 --> 00:11:00,000 you sit there asking or they're asking you like, Hey, man, he's, do you know why he's 118 00:11:00,000 --> 00:11:05,000 been acting up as everything going on? Is anything going on at home? And you just sit 119 00:11:05,000 --> 00:11:09,000 there like, no, everything is fine. And in the midst of you like saying that shit, like 120 00:11:09,000 --> 00:11:15,000 the person crossing stuff squinting their eyes kind of like, Oh shit, is that so so from 121 00:11:15,000 --> 00:11:23,000 Brucey butts number seven? And it is. But that's the choice that you made. And that shit is 122 00:11:23,000 --> 00:11:29,000 like lifelong. But at the same time, don't be a senior. You pass man. Shit. If that's what 123 00:11:29,000 --> 00:11:36,000 you was doing, you know, standing stand on it like B. Yeah, that's what was, you know, 124 00:11:36,000 --> 00:11:40,000 said it might still be who you are, but I'm just trying something different. So shout out 125 00:11:40,000 --> 00:11:48,000 to porn stars man. That's it. I'm sorry. Like I said, I know I'm not your motherfucking first person 126 00:11:48,000 --> 00:11:53,000 you ever been with, but I want to be able to dig in my pocket and fucking Google you are 127 00:11:53,000 --> 00:11:58,000 going porn hub or some shit. And your face is on the camera your eyes wide looking like 128 00:11:58,000 --> 00:12:05,000 this shit. Dr. Wayne is like, fuck. I'm about to go make dinner for this late. Fuck that. 129 00:12:05,000 --> 00:12:15,000 Like anytime. Yeah, no. Passing on this. Oh, yo, I read this article the other day. I actually 130 00:12:15,000 --> 00:12:21,000 read two articles and they kind of like similar but they not. So one article, they were saying 131 00:12:21,000 --> 00:12:27,000 that these researchers, they have like these these cells or what I was from a person that 132 00:12:27,000 --> 00:12:33,000 like passed away and the cells are like still active, but they're not alive. I know that 133 00:12:33,000 --> 00:12:38,000 sounds confusing because I was confused by when I first read it. So they said like these 134 00:12:38,000 --> 00:12:46,000 cells that they have are technically clinically dead. So they're not alive, but they're functional. 135 00:12:46,000 --> 00:12:51,000 And not only are they functional, like they're like playing music for for these cells and 136 00:12:51,000 --> 00:12:55,000 introduce them like different smells or like textures from atmosphere and they send that 137 00:12:55,000 --> 00:13:00,000 the cells are adapting to it. So they said it's not dead. It's not alive. It's in a third 138 00:13:00,000 --> 00:13:07,000 state and they can they can explain what that third state is. So then I started thinking 139 00:13:07,000 --> 00:13:15,000 I'm like, damn, is it like, you know, is it like in a dimension or some shit? Maybe not. 140 00:13:15,000 --> 00:13:21,000 But but I was intrigued by that shit. So I can't delve too deep into it because I don't know 141 00:13:21,000 --> 00:13:26,000 enough about it and I won't be giving out misinformation. But who the fuck is coming to me for 142 00:13:26,000 --> 00:13:31,000 correctness and taking do with that, whatever you want. But the second article that I read 143 00:13:31,000 --> 00:13:38,000 that I found super interesting, I want to say this was in Japan. I want to say Japan, but 144 00:13:38,000 --> 00:13:43,000 it could have been China, but I want to say it was Japan where they have this machine. 145 00:13:43,000 --> 00:13:48,000 It looks similar to like when you get like an MRI or whatever, and you go into that like 146 00:13:48,000 --> 00:13:54,000 circular thing and you slide in there or whatever. But they said that this machine has the ability 147 00:13:54,000 --> 00:14:00,000 to record your dreams while you sleep and then plan back for you when you wake up so you can 148 00:14:00,000 --> 00:14:07,000 analyze the dream. That is some of the craziest shit I've ever heard. But that shit is so 149 00:14:07,000 --> 00:14:16,000 fine. Like I read this book once and they say that everybody has at least like five to ten 150 00:14:16,000 --> 00:14:21,000 dreams a night. And when you wake up and you remember the dream, it might hold some kind 151 00:14:21,000 --> 00:14:28,000 of like personal significance to you or something. But that's why your dreams seem so out of whack 152 00:14:28,000 --> 00:14:33,000 or like just all over the fucking place because you might be remembering bits and pieces from 153 00:14:33,000 --> 00:14:37,000 each dream. So like you might, you know, I was at the amusement park, then I got on the 154 00:14:37,000 --> 00:14:41,000 roller coaster, but as the roller coaster went down, we was at Grandma's house. And then 155 00:14:41,000 --> 00:14:45,000 Grandma told me to go out back. When I opened up the back door, I was in like the Mahavi 156 00:14:45,000 --> 00:14:49,000 house. But then I started digging and then Santa Claus pulled my arm up through the hole 157 00:14:49,000 --> 00:14:55,000 and I was in the North Pole. Like the fuck kind of dream was that? But you know, when you 158 00:14:55,000 --> 00:15:00,000 analyze it, you can feel like your life is going up and down with the roller coaster. 159 00:15:00,000 --> 00:15:04,000 You can miss your grandma and you wish that you still had that home type of feeling. You 160 00:15:04,000 --> 00:15:09,000 know what I mean? And then maybe the Santa Claus park might be you looking for like a 161 00:15:09,000 --> 00:15:15,000 supernatural figure like to pull you through some shit. Damn, I just freestyle that shit. 162 00:15:15,000 --> 00:15:21,000 That shit kind of makes sense. But at the same time, it don't make any sense. I'm not 163 00:15:21,000 --> 00:15:27,000 naked. And it was out there listening right now. Like here's that get off my wing. 164 00:15:27,000 --> 00:15:36,000 I cannot stop saying this fucking word. But yeah, yo, the think how far technology 165 00:15:36,000 --> 00:15:43,000 advanced that, you know, I could record your fucking dream and then play it for like, I 166 00:15:43,000 --> 00:15:50,000 got to look deeper into that because I need to understand like one, who made this like 167 00:15:50,000 --> 00:15:58,000 amazing breakthrough to what equipment are they using? Like are they like taking? I'm 168 00:15:58,000 --> 00:16:02,000 pretty sure they probably like standing your brainwaves, whatever. But the way it was 169 00:16:02,000 --> 00:16:07,000 explained is how I'm saying the verbatim that, you know, going this machine, they record 170 00:16:07,000 --> 00:16:12,000 while you sleep, they film your dreams. When you wake up, they plan back for it. Like I 171 00:16:12,000 --> 00:16:16,000 got to I got to look deep into that. So I need to understand that level of like technology. 172 00:16:16,000 --> 00:16:22,000 That shit is so advanced. Like, like, all right, what's something like deja vu, which 173 00:16:22,000 --> 00:16:30,000 I looked up. Yo, scientists can explain what the fuck it is. But they obviously know that 174 00:16:30,000 --> 00:16:34,000 it's real because who hasn't experienced it? You know, you might find yourself, you know, 175 00:16:34,000 --> 00:16:39,000 in a grocery store, you might be like pulling up to like a party or some shit and go, oh, 176 00:16:39,000 --> 00:16:46,000 fuck that. What makes me think that there may be multiple dimensions, whatever. And it 177 00:16:46,000 --> 00:16:53,000 might just be a moment where you on dimension one might line up with the same version of 178 00:16:53,000 --> 00:16:58,000 yourself, but he's like in dimension 10 or some shit. And y'all just happen to just like 179 00:16:58,000 --> 00:17:04,000 be overnight moment. You go up for at the same time. But then, you know, dimension one, 180 00:17:04,000 --> 00:17:08,000 you might get out, go to the party and meet your wife. And then dimension 13 or 10 or 181 00:17:08,000 --> 00:17:13,000 whatever, you might get out the car and then like fucking getting a fight with like a street 182 00:17:13,000 --> 00:17:21,000 swoop and do some shit. What's crazy? Like, when you think about like the, I don't know, 183 00:17:21,000 --> 00:17:27,000 like, I'm not smart enough to say that having exist or doesn't exist. Like how the fuck 184 00:17:27,000 --> 00:17:33,000 does anybody truly know? But if that gives you like peace of mind or that, then I wish 185 00:17:33,000 --> 00:17:37,000 you the best for that. I empower you to move in that direction. That's what gives you that 186 00:17:37,000 --> 00:17:42,000 chance to comfort. But for me, like I asked too many questions. It's just like most should 187 00:17:42,000 --> 00:17:46,000 be like, well, how do you know? And that's kind of the beauty of life is that like, yo, 188 00:17:46,000 --> 00:17:51,000 there's some questions you just won't ever get the answer to. And when you learn how to 189 00:17:51,000 --> 00:17:58,000 accept that life becomes so much more just it just becomes easier. And I mean, like we 190 00:17:58,000 --> 00:18:04,000 overthink, which is not a bad thing, but it can be. Like you got control of that. And 191 00:18:04,000 --> 00:18:10,000 that's what we shall realize. Like, you know, if you focus too much on the past, like it 192 00:18:10,000 --> 00:18:16,000 will make you feel depressed. If you focus too much on the future, it'll give you anxiety 193 00:18:16,000 --> 00:18:21,000 because you're preparing for shit. Or you're trying to like remedy a problem that hasn't 194 00:18:21,000 --> 00:18:27,000 encouraged you. Like the best thing is to like live in a moment. Be present in the moment. 195 00:18:27,000 --> 00:18:33,000 Like when I watch like, let's say I'm watching something on TV. And they'll show like the 196 00:18:33,000 --> 00:18:38,000 like the crowd and everybody in the crowd got that phone up recording the moment. And 197 00:18:38,000 --> 00:18:42,000 I get it. You want to be able to show people that you had that experience. You might even 198 00:18:42,000 --> 00:18:45,000 want to double back yourself when you think about that experience. But it's like, did you 199 00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:50,000 really experience it? You know what I mean? Like you were so focused on let me make sure 200 00:18:50,000 --> 00:18:55,000 I got the right angle and I did you even enjoy what you were seeing in person? Some shit is 201 00:18:55,000 --> 00:19:00,000 just better word of mouth. Like my grandmother used to like tell us stories and all that 202 00:19:00,000 --> 00:19:06,000 shit and she have no in the document that that shit even happened. But I believe that 203 00:19:06,000 --> 00:19:10,000 I have a reason not to. You know what I mean? Like her telling me the first time she heard 204 00:19:10,000 --> 00:19:16,000 like Malcolm X speech. I mean not speech, but she heard him speak and you know, and that 205 00:19:16,000 --> 00:19:21,000 time black people wasn't really allowed to talk like that. So she said like the head 206 00:19:21,000 --> 00:19:27,000 at it gave hope. Even though she was like a desal Christian and she loved she loved 207 00:19:27,000 --> 00:19:34,000 my movie. But I think like Malcolm was like her guilty pleasure. Like, yeah, he was the 208 00:19:34,000 --> 00:19:40,000 bad boy of activism type of shit. At least I feel like that's how my grandma might have 209 00:19:40,000 --> 00:19:45,000 viewed him. And I could be way off base. There's my grandma, a person like 94. I'm fucking 210 00:19:45,000 --> 00:19:51,000 assuming and flu styling with I think she meant but from my recollection, I do recall 211 00:19:51,000 --> 00:19:57,000 her, you know, speaking of Malcolm X almost like he was a rebel type of shit. And I think 212 00:19:57,000 --> 00:20:03,000 that's where my love for Malcolm X came in. So when I was like 10 or 11, I got the 213 00:20:03,000 --> 00:20:09,000 autobiography of Malcolm X by like Alakali, who's the same dude who like wrote roots or 214 00:20:09,000 --> 00:20:15,000 whatever. With like, LeVar Burton, when he played like a cool, some shit, and you got 215 00:20:15,000 --> 00:20:22,000 to cut off and whatever. But I remember reading when I was like 11. And at the time it like 216 00:20:22,000 --> 00:20:28,000 just felt like words. So I remember I got my first apartment and I'm unpacking my shit. 217 00:20:28,000 --> 00:20:34,000 And I find the autobiography of Malcolm X from when I was like 11, which I still have 218 00:20:34,000 --> 00:20:39,000 right now. I still have that exact one. And I remember reading the game when I was like 219 00:20:39,000 --> 00:20:44,000 19 or 20. And it became so much more than words. Like I felt myself and I could see 220 00:20:44,000 --> 00:20:49,000 myself in a lot of those like chapters and like damn, I know that experience. Damn, I 221 00:20:49,000 --> 00:20:56,000 know that film. Yeah, I mean, and like, I love Malcolm X. I think one of the greatest. 222 00:20:56,000 --> 00:21:02,000 But then I found out some shit about the Alex Haley version. So there's a college 223 00:21:02,000 --> 00:21:09,000 historian named Manon Marble and he wrote a version of the two. But his shit is like 224 00:21:09,000 --> 00:21:14,000 the raw uncut behind the scenes. His his autobiography or his version of the Malcolm 225 00:21:14,000 --> 00:21:18,000 autobiography actually starts with Malcolm's father. And I was like from Canada and had 226 00:21:18,000 --> 00:21:22,000 a whole wife and kids up there and then came down to America to follow the teaching the 227 00:21:22,000 --> 00:21:27,000 Muckers Garvey and I banded his like first family. And then it gets into like how you 228 00:21:27,000 --> 00:21:32,000 met the mom and how they had the kids and how you died. Then it gets to Malcolm and 229 00:21:32,000 --> 00:21:39,000 all that. But I found out there might have been somebody from like Malcolm X's family, 230 00:21:39,000 --> 00:21:44,000 maybe one of his daughters. Yo, Alex Haley didn't really care for Malcolm X. He didn't 231 00:21:44,000 --> 00:21:50,000 dislike him, but like he didn't believe in separatism. So when he was doing the 232 00:21:50,000 --> 00:21:54,000 autobiography of Malcolm X, a lot of the stuff where like he was interviewing Malcolm X 233 00:21:54,000 --> 00:22:00,000 directly was in the midst of him, you know, facing out of the nation, the Islam and the 234 00:22:00,000 --> 00:22:07,000 book wasn't completed when Malcolm died. So a lot of that stuff that's in the autobiography 235 00:22:07,000 --> 00:22:12,000 of Malcolm X by Alex Haley, a lot of that is Alex Haley's personal beliefs and shit. 236 00:22:12,000 --> 00:22:18,000 You know, saying like that shit wasn't like authentically Malcolm. I mean, it was up to 237 00:22:18,000 --> 00:22:23,000 a certain point, but then, you know, if the person that I'm trying to follow around and 238 00:22:23,000 --> 00:22:29,000 document dies, but I still got unanswered questions. Now I got an answer based on me 239 00:22:29,000 --> 00:22:34,000 being around them and assuming what I think he would answer. You know what I mean? I think 240 00:22:34,000 --> 00:22:39,000 you should read both versions like they're both great. But I feel like the Alex Haley 241 00:22:39,000 --> 00:22:44,000 version kind of got like an asterisk next to it. Even though that's the version that 242 00:22:44,000 --> 00:22:49,000 kind of put me on the path that I am, that I'm on now is like, yo, think more, think 243 00:22:49,000 --> 00:22:55,000 before you speak, take shit in consideration. You know what I mean? Realizing that, you 244 00:22:55,000 --> 00:23:00,000 know, everything ain't about you. I read this quote once and said, when you stand in 245 00:23:00,000 --> 00:23:06,000 front of the ocean, you're supposed to feel small. Realize that you're just a part of 246 00:23:06,000 --> 00:23:11,000 the world, but you're not the world. I'm just a drop of rain in the ocean. You know what 247 00:23:11,000 --> 00:23:18,000 I'm saying? I'm playing my small part and whatever this matrix is, whatever this universe 248 00:23:18,000 --> 00:23:26,000 is, I'm just making my mark. Oh, playing my part, I should say. Playing my part. That 249 00:23:26,000 --> 00:23:30,000 makes me think, that makes me kind of want to go on the topic like a free will and that 250 00:23:30,000 --> 00:23:38,000 we really had. But I might say that for like a different time. But I remember I used to 251 00:23:38,000 --> 00:23:45,000 pose this question to friends of mine who were like, no, on street. Like I said, I ain't 252 00:23:45,000 --> 00:23:51,000 making it like I was the most street guy ever. But I did my toe out there and I've seen what 253 00:23:51,000 --> 00:23:59,000 I've seen and all of that jazz. But it's kind of like skew my opinions and based on 254 00:23:59,000 --> 00:24:04,000 what I deserve. But anyways, I used to ask my friends like, yo, bro, are you a good person? 255 00:24:04,000 --> 00:24:09,000 And they would go, yeah, I'm a good person. I go, what makes you a good person? And they 256 00:24:09,000 --> 00:24:16,000 go, because I am. Which really isn't the answer. But I guess it's the answer. So then I'll 257 00:24:16,000 --> 00:24:21,000 double up with the second question like, all right, if tomorrow they said it was completely 258 00:24:21,000 --> 00:24:27,000 legal to rob a bank, there's no consequences. What would stop you from doing it? They was 259 00:24:27,000 --> 00:24:30,000 like, well, I wouldn't get in trouble for robbing the bank. I'm like, no, I was like, 260 00:24:30,000 --> 00:24:36,000 if you don't see a less dollar, but now robbing banks are completely legal. What'd you do? 261 00:24:36,000 --> 00:24:41,000 They go, hell yeah. Bro, you're not a good person. He's like, what you mean? I'm trying 262 00:24:41,000 --> 00:24:46,000 to survive. I was like, that's not what's the question. If something you know is wrong 263 00:24:46,000 --> 00:24:51,000 at this core, you're taking money from other people. You might potentially have to hurt 264 00:24:51,000 --> 00:24:55,000 somebody in the process of getting that money. But then because you know there is no consequences 265 00:24:55,000 --> 00:25:03,000 attached to this, you're going to do it freely. So I go, yo, are you a good person because 266 00:25:03,000 --> 00:25:08,000 you're a good person? Or are you a good person because you feel like you have to be? And 267 00:25:08,000 --> 00:25:13,000 that kind of play into like, when I hear like, you know, really religious people, it's like, 268 00:25:13,000 --> 00:25:19,000 all right, it's just really guiding you to be a good person. Or are you hoping for some 269 00:25:19,000 --> 00:25:27,000 grand reward in the end, heaven? Or are you afraid of some grand level of like consequence? 270 00:25:27,000 --> 00:25:34,000 Like hell. I mean, because if we go by like, if you, if you, of the Christian faith, because 271 00:25:34,000 --> 00:25:39,000 I don't want to speak to all the religions, like they the same mountain to y'all. But 272 00:25:39,000 --> 00:25:44,000 if there is a God, I believe that like God is a tree and every religion that exists is 273 00:25:44,000 --> 00:25:51,000 a branch off that tree, which leads back to God. If that's like, what's the, but you know, 274 00:25:51,000 --> 00:25:56,000 like I said, I'm using this like Christian based type of shit because it's the most common 275 00:25:56,000 --> 00:26:03,000 common religion, at least like in the country, city, state that I live in. This is like, well, 276 00:26:03,000 --> 00:26:10,000 the 10 commandments, nobody fucking abide by none of that shit. Maybe the major one like 277 00:26:10,000 --> 00:26:17,000 dowson, not killed, but other than that, nigga's lie, nigga's cheat, nigga's still, you know, 278 00:26:17,000 --> 00:26:24,000 I mean, they fucking, and then they'll double back and go, well, God knows my heart. What's 279 00:26:24,000 --> 00:26:27,000 kind of go back to the free will shit that I don't really want to get into right now, 280 00:26:27,000 --> 00:26:31,000 but I was just touching on a little bit. They say like everything that we do is written in 281 00:26:31,000 --> 00:26:36,000 a book and it's predetermined type of shit, but God gives you the free will to do what 282 00:26:36,000 --> 00:26:44,000 you want. So is your life written or are you writing it? And if God had the power like 283 00:26:44,000 --> 00:26:48,000 to, you know, stop you from doing some bad shit, why would he let you do it? If it's 284 00:26:48,000 --> 00:26:53,000 even to him, but I don't want to get me at some, not trying to send a bite. I usually 285 00:26:53,000 --> 00:26:58,000 avoid religion and politics because people are too emotional when it comes to those like 286 00:26:58,000 --> 00:27:03,000 topics and shit. So unless I'm really, really close with you, then we can have the back 287 00:27:03,000 --> 00:27:07,000 and forth and all that. And in the midst of me having the back and forth, the back and 288 00:27:07,000 --> 00:27:10,000 forth isn't for me to prove that I'm right about some shit. Cause that's not what I'm 289 00:27:10,000 --> 00:27:14,000 trying to do. I'm just trying to get your perspective and share mine. And we may have 290 00:27:14,000 --> 00:27:18,000 some points that are lying and then we may have some points that like just like, you 291 00:27:18,000 --> 00:27:24,000 know, like polar opposite. And I think it's, I think both sides are dope because like for 292 00:27:24,000 --> 00:27:30,000 me, it's more about the dialogue. That shit is important. You know what I'm saying? So 293 00:27:30,000 --> 00:27:34,000 people don't talk to each other enough. That's why so many misconceptions. That's why 294 00:27:34,000 --> 00:27:38,000 so many misunderstandings like real cease-mise from a different culture and just assumed 295 00:27:38,000 --> 00:27:42,000 some shit because like we don't have that dialogue. We don't have that level of understanding 296 00:27:42,000 --> 00:27:49,000 stuff. You know, and I think that drives the wedge between us globally, fit locally, 297 00:27:49,000 --> 00:27:58,000 nationally, like whatever level, but yeah, just random scatterbrained shit. Hopefully 298 00:27:58,000 --> 00:28:07,000 y'all are used to it by now. And with that being said, I want to thank everybody who 299 00:28:07,000 --> 00:28:12,000 tuned in to listen. Even if you played this for like five minutes. And if you did, you 300 00:28:12,000 --> 00:28:16,000 not even hear this part, but if you made it to this part, I want to thank you for listening. 301 00:28:16,000 --> 00:28:20,000 I want to thank you for taking the time to listen to me because who the fuck am I? I'm 302 00:28:20,000 --> 00:28:27,000 just a regular ass dude. But taking time out of your day, you know, anyways, if you want 303 00:28:27,000 --> 00:28:32,000 to reach out to me, have any questions, concerns, want to challenge anything that I said, you 304 00:28:32,000 --> 00:28:43,000 can follow me on Instagram at QG Music. That's Q G M U S I C Music. Or QG Music. I just said 305 00:28:43,000 --> 00:28:50,000 it. You'll find it. Like you'll find it. I hope everybody is safe. I hope everybody 306 00:28:50,000 --> 00:28:55,000 is productive. I hope I hope whatever goal that you're chasing, you get one step closer 307 00:28:55,000 --> 00:29:02,000 if not achieving it completely. Talk to you next time. Peace.