Hello and welcome to the CRS podcast. In this cringe-filled episode, we dive into the story of
a guy who made the ultimate mistake, confusing his girlfriend's sister for his girlfriend.
What started as a casual evening turned into a mortifying disaster when he draped his arm around
the wrong woman. So this happened last night and I still can't look anyone in the eye.
It was over at my girlfriend's apartment for dinner. She shares the place with a younger sister
who's visiting for a few months while figuring out her next steps in life. Let's call my girlfriend
Anna and her sister Lila. I've met Lila maybe twice before but we've never had a full conversation.
Just a hi. Nice to meet you vibe. Dinner was great. Afterward, Anna said she was going to hop in the
shower before we watched a movie. I stayed in the living room, scrolling on my phone. A few minutes
later, I heard the shower stop and someone walked past me in a baggy hoodie and pajama pants. I assumed
it was Anna since Lila had been in her room all evening. Here's where it went south. The Anna,
I thought I saw sat on the couch next to me. I casually draped my arm over her shoulders and
leaned in saying something cheesy like, hey, you smell nice. Well, she froze like absolutely stiff
as a board. I thought she was messing with me. So I gave her a playful nudge and added, don't be shy.
Then I hear Anna's voice from the hallway. She's standing there with her hair in a towel, looking
at us with the most bewildered expression. It hits me like a truck. I look down at the person next
to me and realize it's Lila. Lila, my brain immediately short circuits and I jerk my arm away
so fast I almost dislocate my shoulder. Lila's face is bright red and she stammers. I just came out
for water before bolting back to her room. Anna just stood there for a second, processing the chaos
and then burst out laughing so hard she had to sit down. She said something like, I leave you alone
for five minutes and you're already making moves on my sister. I tried to explain, but the words
came out all wrong. Like, I didn't know it was her. I mean, I thought it was you. Not that I was
trying to know, wait, Lila hasn't come out of her room since. Anna is still teasing me about it.
And now I'm dreading every family gathering for the rest of eternity. TLDR thought my girlfriend's
sister was my girlfriend, put my arm around her, and now I'm too mortified to exist. So you think
the embarrassment would end there, right? Wrong. It got worse. Anna, being the chaotic spirit she is,
decided this incident was too funny to keep to herself. The next morning, I woke up to her
absolutely cackling on the phone with her mom. She was telling the entire story word for word,
down to the part where I said, hey, you smell nice. I'm lying there, dying inside because now
her mom knows. I can never show my face at their family dinners again. But Anna wasn't done. Oh no.
Apparently, Lila texted their older brother about what happened. And now he's in the loop too. By
lunchtime, the family group chat is popping off with memes. Memes. One of them photoshopped my face
onto that Spider-Man pointing meme. You know, the one where two Spider-Man are accusing each other
of being the imposter, except the caption read, when you can't tell your girlfriend from her
sister. But the cherry on top came later that day when Lila finally emerged from her room. I tried
to apologize like really apologize, but she wouldn't make eye contact. She just said, it's fine,
don't worry about it. And then added, I'm staying with a friend for a few days. She left the apartment
guys. I scared her out of her own home. Anna thought this was hilarious, but I felt like an
absolute monster. And just when I thought I could escape the situation, Anna's dad called me. He's
this big, intimidating guy who's always been nice, but kind of reserved around me. I figured he
wouldn't talk about the incident. So I was bracing myself. Instead, he goes, so Lila told me what
happened. Just remember, you only get one strike. Then he hung up. What does that even mean?
Am I on probation now? Do I need to wear a name tag with Anna's boyfriend on it at family events
to avoid further mix ups? Now, every time I go over to Anna's place, I'm triple checking who's in
the room before I even look in someone's direction. The trust is gone, man. TLDR update. Anna's entire
family knows there are memes her sister moved out temporarily. And I'm possibly on probation with her
dad. I should probably just dig a hole and live in it forever.