1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:07,900 So whether you are watching this on Christmas Eve, New Year's Eve, in between Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, and New Year's Eve, 2 00:00:07,900 --> 00:00:17,100 or if it is completely after the holidays in general, I welcome you here and I really thank you so much for tuning in for another episode. 3 00:00:17,100 --> 00:00:22,300 If it is Christmas Eve, Merry Christmas Eve, Happy Holidays to you. 4 00:00:22,300 --> 00:00:32,800 Today I thought I'd do a little bit of a fusion episode and when I say fusion episode, I mean a fusion of Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, and New Year's Eve. 5 00:00:32,800 --> 00:00:43,100 This story today is going to be about a guy who I more or less broke up with on Christmas Eve via text in 2018. 6 00:00:43,100 --> 00:00:48,000 There's a reason for why this happened and I'll get into that briefly very soon. 7 00:00:48,000 --> 00:00:54,800 It was a very short-lived relationship, but I do think that the significance of breaking up on Christmas Eve, 8 00:00:54,800 --> 00:01:07,600 one of the most romantic times of the year, plays a huge role in this because I think that many of us don't want to spoil such a big holiday with such a tragic breakup or event. 9 00:01:07,600 --> 00:01:09,900 But sometimes it's really the right thing to do. 10 00:01:09,900 --> 00:01:19,300 I just hope that with this episode that you feel more fueled or encouraged in some sort of way to really really think about what you want for the New Year 11 00:01:19,300 --> 00:01:27,700 and to decide whether or not to let those toxic friendship situationships, whatever, to let them go and to start on a clean slate. 12 00:01:27,700 --> 00:01:33,100 So without further ado, let's go ahead and jump right into the episode. 13 00:01:33,100 --> 00:01:38,800 This specific story is going to be about somebody I once dated from Romania. 14 00:01:38,800 --> 00:01:41,800 I'm referring to him in this story as Mario. 15 00:01:41,800 --> 00:01:47,100 I will give a little bit of background as to how Mario and I first met in the first place. 16 00:01:47,100 --> 00:01:51,600 Mario and I met actually in Ohio, super random. 17 00:01:51,600 --> 00:01:57,100 I was visiting friends in Cleveland for a weekend one summer afternoon in 2018. 18 00:01:57,100 --> 00:02:02,100 Met Mario at a restaurant since he was doing a work and travel program from Romania. 19 00:02:02,100 --> 00:02:03,300 We got in touch. 20 00:02:03,300 --> 00:02:11,700 We stayed in touch, but there was something always very weird and recurring about Mario that I somehow just never picked up on. 21 00:02:11,700 --> 00:02:16,300 And it's something that I think a lot of us really struggle with when we really like somebody. 22 00:02:16,300 --> 00:02:27,700 Mario had a habit of constantly ghosting me out of nowhere and disappearing for weeks, not sending me a message, not checking in. 23 00:02:27,700 --> 00:02:32,700 He would just disappear and I wouldn't know what would happen to him. 24 00:02:32,700 --> 00:02:35,300 So the first time this happened, I ignored it. 25 00:02:35,300 --> 00:02:37,500 This was the same year I went to France. 26 00:02:37,500 --> 00:02:39,800 He randomly got back in touch with me. 27 00:02:39,800 --> 00:02:45,300 He had gone back to Romania at that point and then we really started to date. 28 00:02:45,300 --> 00:02:47,500 Well, we would talk regularly. 29 00:02:47,500 --> 00:02:53,700 There was a point in time when I was in France when I wanted to go and see Mario in Romania. 30 00:02:53,700 --> 00:03:02,600 And so my friend and I at the time, my friend who was working in a French middle school teaching English like I was, 31 00:03:02,600 --> 00:03:08,200 we decided to go to Romania as part of our vacation that we had this fall. 32 00:03:08,200 --> 00:03:12,300 I saw Mario again and he was really weird. 33 00:03:12,300 --> 00:03:14,600 My friend did not like him. 34 00:03:14,600 --> 00:03:17,800 My friend found him to be very offensive. 35 00:03:17,800 --> 00:03:19,800 He had made fascist jokes. 36 00:03:19,800 --> 00:03:26,500 I had overlooked and really ignored that because I really was into him and I really was thinking, 37 00:03:26,500 --> 00:03:28,700 Oh, well, my friend is just sensitive. 38 00:03:28,700 --> 00:03:29,900 My friend is American. 39 00:03:29,900 --> 00:03:32,500 Americans are so sensitive to everything. 40 00:03:32,500 --> 00:03:33,700 He's just joking. 41 00:03:33,700 --> 00:03:35,400 He's not being serious. 42 00:03:35,400 --> 00:03:37,600 But oh, little did I know. 43 00:03:37,600 --> 00:03:40,400 So after that visit, it was very brief. 44 00:03:40,400 --> 00:03:43,200 It was for one day went back to France. 45 00:03:43,200 --> 00:03:46,600 We kept in touch and then he disappears again. 46 00:03:46,600 --> 00:03:49,500 And I'm really just thinking why do you keep disappearing? 47 00:03:49,500 --> 00:03:50,700 Come December. 48 00:03:50,700 --> 00:03:53,100 It's the beginning of the Christmas season. 49 00:03:53,100 --> 00:03:59,600 Mario had just come back from ghosting me for I don't know how long and I really wanted to make an effort 50 00:03:59,600 --> 00:04:03,200 to see him in person again this time without my friend. 51 00:04:03,200 --> 00:04:11,200 So I really was persistent and I told Mario I really want to come see you in Bucharest again since he was living in Bucharest 52 00:04:11,200 --> 00:04:12,300 with his sister. 53 00:04:12,300 --> 00:04:13,800 I really want to see you. 54 00:04:13,800 --> 00:04:17,400 Let's do something for the beginning of the Christmas season. 55 00:04:17,400 --> 00:04:23,900 So I bought a ticket to Romania went to Romania and he was weird again. 56 00:04:23,900 --> 00:04:29,000 There was this one moment and I have to say there are not 57 00:04:29,000 --> 00:04:32,800 necessarily limitations on this podcast. 58 00:04:32,800 --> 00:04:39,900 So what you're about to hear is something that I recommend you come in with an open mind in listening to. 59 00:04:39,900 --> 00:04:43,900 So you've been warned when Mario and I were together. 60 00:04:43,900 --> 00:04:49,000 There was this one intimate moment where let's just say in the bedroom. 61 00:04:49,000 --> 00:04:56,800 He was very awkward and you're probably thinking what what what did he do? 62 00:04:56,800 --> 00:04:58,300 What made him awkward? 63 00:04:58,300 --> 00:05:08,500 There was this one moment when we were intimate and out of nowhere Mario goes yee haw. 64 00:05:08,500 --> 00:05:11,900 Yee haw like what is that? 65 00:05:11,900 --> 00:05:16,300 Who the fuck does that when you are being intimate? 66 00:05:16,300 --> 00:05:24,300 So I knew something was really kind of very eccentric about him when he went yee haw and his little chihuahua was in the room 67 00:05:24,300 --> 00:05:27,500 watching the whole damn thing. 68 00:05:27,500 --> 00:05:30,800 I really thought I was in a really crazy movie. 69 00:05:30,800 --> 00:05:38,200 Yee haw moment happens his sister who was very nice gave me these like toxically strong 70 00:05:38,200 --> 00:05:44,800 rum filled cherry chocolates, which I just I felt like I had tasted poison when I took a bite out of one of those. 71 00:05:44,800 --> 00:05:48,500 She had every good intention, but yikes that was strong. 72 00:05:48,500 --> 00:05:50,000 The time with Mario was good. 73 00:05:50,000 --> 00:05:57,200 I go back to France again and it's after that trip that I wanted to start planning our Christmas Eve 74 00:05:57,200 --> 00:05:58,500 and New Year's. 75 00:05:58,500 --> 00:06:05,100 I had texted Mario and I told him I would love to spend Christmas and New Year's with you, 76 00:06:05,100 --> 00:06:10,600 especially New Year's because at that point in time I had never had a New Year's kiss. 77 00:06:10,600 --> 00:06:15,400 In the beginning he's on board and he says yes come to Romania. 78 00:06:15,400 --> 00:06:22,100 We'll go see my parents and spend Christmas and New Year's on the border of Moldova where my parents have a cabin. 79 00:06:22,100 --> 00:06:27,100 And of course, I was really in love with this idea and I really wanted to book tickets. 80 00:06:27,100 --> 00:06:35,500 I tried to book tickets, but unfortunately it was very difficult to book those tickets because somebody wouldn't confirm the schedule 81 00:06:35,500 --> 00:06:38,600 wouldn't confirm that it was okay for me to come. 82 00:06:38,600 --> 00:06:41,500 So this is a couple of weeks before Christmas Eve. 83 00:06:41,500 --> 00:06:45,300 I'm trying so hard to get in touch with Mario. 84 00:06:45,300 --> 00:06:53,500 I'm trying to get him to confirm plans so I can buy a damn plane ticket and he went radio silent again. 85 00:06:53,500 --> 00:06:55,000 Radio silent. 86 00:06:55,000 --> 00:06:57,400 No word. No nothing. 87 00:06:57,400 --> 00:06:59,400 I tried calling him on WhatsApp. 88 00:06:59,400 --> 00:07:01,100 I called him on Facebook Messenger. 89 00:07:01,100 --> 00:07:03,000 I tried his regular phone. 90 00:07:03,000 --> 00:07:04,300 I tried everything. 91 00:07:04,300 --> 00:07:05,000 I texted. 92 00:07:05,000 --> 00:07:06,600 I sent voice messages. 93 00:07:06,600 --> 00:07:10,700 Everything that you could imagine I could really do in my capacity. 94 00:07:10,700 --> 00:07:14,600 I did and I could not get in touch with him. 95 00:07:14,600 --> 00:07:22,300 I told Mario Mario if you don't answer me, I'm not going to come. 96 00:07:22,300 --> 00:07:28,300 I am going to go with my other plans because I can't rely on you anymore. 97 00:07:28,300 --> 00:07:30,200 You keep ghosting me. 98 00:07:30,200 --> 00:07:33,000 I can't have someone like this in my life. 99 00:07:33,000 --> 00:07:37,400 I don't know why you keep ghosting me, but it's not polite. 100 00:07:37,400 --> 00:07:39,000 I know you are busy. 101 00:07:39,000 --> 00:07:46,200 I understand that but can you not send a one word text to me just say yes. 102 00:07:46,200 --> 00:07:55,100 No that flight is not okay or if you don't want me to come tell me I'm making it easy. 103 00:07:55,100 --> 00:07:57,000 Mario doesn't respond. 104 00:07:57,000 --> 00:08:04,000 It's at that point in time that I really realized Mario is never going to change Mario is going to keep ghosting me. 105 00:08:04,000 --> 00:08:08,100 He's going to keep being unreliable emotionally unavailable. 106 00:08:08,100 --> 00:08:09,800 What if I buy this ticket? 107 00:08:09,800 --> 00:08:20,800 What if I go to Bucharest and I'm stuck on Christmas Eve and nobody is going to pick me up from the airport and I'm stuck. 108 00:08:20,800 --> 00:08:22,800 I couldn't take that risk. 109 00:08:22,800 --> 00:08:24,200 I didn't want to take that risk. 110 00:08:24,200 --> 00:08:25,200 I was so done. 111 00:08:25,200 --> 00:08:26,300 I was so tired. 112 00:08:26,300 --> 00:08:30,800 I knew that I was more valuable and I deserved so much better than that. 113 00:08:30,800 --> 00:08:33,600 I didn't say anything to him. 114 00:08:33,600 --> 00:08:35,900 I gave him a chance to respond. 115 00:08:35,900 --> 00:08:37,500 He didn't respond. 116 00:08:37,500 --> 00:08:43,300 I decided that I was going to go to Poland and subsequently I was going to go to Ukraine. 117 00:08:43,300 --> 00:08:45,400 I just didn't want to keep doing it. 118 00:08:45,400 --> 00:08:49,700 So I organized my plans to go to Poland and Ukraine with my friend. 119 00:08:49,700 --> 00:08:53,900 We get to Poland spent a few days in Wroclaw and then before we know it. 120 00:08:53,900 --> 00:08:54,900 It's Christmas Eve. 121 00:08:54,900 --> 00:08:58,600 We were still in Wroclaw and out of the blue. 122 00:08:58,600 --> 00:09:05,300 I get a text after two and a half weeks from Mario two and a half weeks. 123 00:09:05,300 --> 00:09:06,400 Really? 124 00:09:06,400 --> 00:09:13,600 I had no idea what he actually was going to say when I saw his name pop up on my phone, 125 00:09:13,600 --> 00:09:15,900 but I opened this text. 126 00:09:15,900 --> 00:09:23,260 He responded as if nothing had actually happened as if I hadn't tried calling him texting him 127 00:09:23,260 --> 00:09:27,740 voice messaging him multiple times trying to get his attention. 128 00:09:27,740 --> 00:09:36,000 He just responded as if nothing happened and he said I got a job and I've been really busy. 129 00:09:36,000 --> 00:09:43,600 Mario had been unemployed for a little while since he usually taught English or languages 130 00:09:43,600 --> 00:09:47,100 of some sort and didn't have work for a few months. 131 00:09:47,100 --> 00:09:52,900 But the minute you get a job, you don't have time to text me a single word to have the 132 00:09:52,900 --> 00:09:56,340 courtesy to tell me no don't come. 133 00:09:56,340 --> 00:10:03,900 He asked me in the text also if I was still coming to Romania for Christmas and New Year's. 134 00:10:03,900 --> 00:10:07,500 It is Christmas Eve. 135 00:10:07,500 --> 00:10:15,100 It is Christmas Eve and you are asking if I am coming to Romania like at that moment? 136 00:10:15,100 --> 00:10:17,860 No, I wasn't. 137 00:10:17,860 --> 00:10:23,420 So it was then that I told him something along the lines of you have let me down so many 138 00:10:23,420 --> 00:10:24,420 times. 139 00:10:24,420 --> 00:10:25,940 No, I'm not coming. 140 00:10:25,940 --> 00:10:29,240 No, you didn't respond when I needed you to respond. 141 00:10:29,240 --> 00:10:31,860 You weren't there when I needed you to be there. 142 00:10:31,860 --> 00:10:34,640 How can you expect that I come to Romania? 143 00:10:34,640 --> 00:10:37,600 You have ghosted me multiple times Mario. 144 00:10:37,600 --> 00:10:39,300 I can't keep doing this. 145 00:10:39,300 --> 00:10:41,120 I'm not coming to Romania. 146 00:10:41,120 --> 00:10:46,460 I'm sticking with my plans of going to Poland and I'm going to Ukraine. 147 00:10:46,460 --> 00:10:48,700 I can't keep doing this. 148 00:10:48,700 --> 00:10:53,080 And that was my Christmas Eve text ending things with Mario. 149 00:10:53,080 --> 00:10:54,940 I went to Ukraine. 150 00:10:54,940 --> 00:11:01,600 I met this American girl who had missed her flight to Vietnam and got stuck in Ukraine 151 00:11:01,600 --> 00:11:03,820 and we kept in touch for some years. 152 00:11:03,820 --> 00:11:05,380 So I gained a new friend. 153 00:11:05,380 --> 00:11:10,540 At the time I had also met two other girls from Munich, Germany and I also met a girl 154 00:11:10,540 --> 00:11:13,620 from California who was in my hostel. 155 00:11:13,620 --> 00:11:19,420 I absolutely don't regret going to Ukraine instead of the border of Moldova and Romania 156 00:11:19,420 --> 00:11:25,540 for New Year's because had I gone I think that it wouldn't have been a good one. 157 00:11:25,540 --> 00:11:30,780 I would have had my very first New Year's kiss with somebody who wouldn't have lasted 158 00:11:30,780 --> 00:11:32,860 into my present time. 159 00:11:32,860 --> 00:11:38,100 My New Year's didn't turn out exactly the way I had planned but I think that it turned 160 00:11:38,100 --> 00:11:39,700 out way better. 161 00:11:39,700 --> 00:11:45,820 I think that power to recognize when to leave, whether again it's a relationship, a job, 162 00:11:45,820 --> 00:11:51,300 a whatever, that is more powerful than sometimes the decision itself. 163 00:11:51,300 --> 00:11:58,820 So this whole Mario, Romania, Ukraine, Poland, Christmas, New Year's story is a story that 164 00:11:58,820 --> 00:12:04,780 I intended to tell with the hope that it would help or encourage or motivate somebody to 165 00:12:04,780 --> 00:12:11,300 some degree to really evaluate the things in your life right now that make you unhappy 166 00:12:11,300 --> 00:12:17,820 that you really need and feel you need to change in order to optimize on your best self 167 00:12:17,820 --> 00:12:19,540 in 2025. 168 00:12:19,540 --> 00:12:23,180 This situation applies to every single year. 169 00:12:23,180 --> 00:12:29,940 This story itself happened six years ago but I still really believe that this same concept 170 00:12:29,940 --> 00:12:34,300 can be applied to whatever year we are going into. 171 00:12:34,300 --> 00:12:39,820 Whatever goals you have for the New Year, whatever plans, whatever trips, whatever people 172 00:12:39,820 --> 00:12:46,260 you hope to meet, I hope that you can do this in so much confidence and success with everything 173 00:12:46,260 --> 00:12:48,980 in your power and in your control. 174 00:12:48,980 --> 00:12:50,500 I believe in you. 175 00:12:50,500 --> 00:12:55,300 So it's with these last words that I'm going to end this episode for today. 176 00:12:55,300 --> 00:13:02,900 I hope that you took some sort of motivation out of any of the words or stories or little 177 00:13:02,900 --> 00:13:05,700 moments that I have mentioned here. 178 00:13:05,700 --> 00:13:10,960 And if you have certain goals or you have requests, if you have things that you're working 179 00:13:10,960 --> 00:13:16,580 on that make you happy, please be sure to share them with me on Instagram, either on 180 00:13:16,580 --> 00:13:25,220 the podcast account @onceuponatrip.pc or on the host account, my personal IG handle 181 00:13:25,220 --> 00:13:27,020 @marygracecrawford 182 00:13:27,020 --> 00:13:34,260 I look forward to hearing from you and I really do hope that you finish off 2024 with a bang. 183 00:13:34,260 --> 00:13:41,340 Whatever time it is for you, I wish you happy holidays, a Merry Christmas, a Happy New Year. 184 00:13:41,340 --> 00:13:47,260 I really look forward to being back here very soon with you for another fun, adventurous 185 00:13:47,260 --> 00:13:49,580 trip of an episode. 186 00:13:49,580 --> 00:13:55,180 Next week's episode is one that I intend to release a little bit earlier than usual 187 00:13:55,180 --> 00:13:59,520 simply because the following Tuesday is New Year's Eve. 188 00:13:59,520 --> 00:14:05,580 So you can expect the next episode to come out just a day or two earlier than our usual 189 00:14:05,580 --> 00:14:07,060 Tuesday schedule. 190 00:14:07,060 --> 00:14:11,060 I hope that you have a wonderful holiday time. 191 00:14:11,060 --> 00:14:12,820 I will see you next time.