WEBVTT

00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:02.940
The big thing that we don't realize is that we're

00:00:02.940 --> 00:00:06.360
feeding our nervous system the experience a constant

00:00:06.360 --> 00:00:09.669
struggle. constant challenge, and we're not feeding

00:00:09.669 --> 00:00:12.929
the experience of a success. I discovered along

00:00:12.929 --> 00:00:15.250
my journey that black women -owned businesses

00:00:15.250 --> 00:00:18.070
are the fastest growing sector of new businesses,

00:00:18.750 --> 00:00:22.309
but our success rate of lasting to five years

00:00:22.309 --> 00:00:25.710
is three percent. That means 97 percent of our

00:00:25.710 --> 00:00:28.530
businesses that start do not make it to five

00:00:28.530 --> 00:00:31.469
years. One big thing is hustle and grind culture

00:00:31.469 --> 00:00:34.689
that puts in our mind that if we're not doing

00:00:34.689 --> 00:00:38.570
something every minute of the I hate the phrase,

00:00:38.670 --> 00:00:42.409
I will sleep when I'm dead. If you won't sleep

00:00:42.409 --> 00:00:44.929
when you're dead, you'll be dead. I firmly believe

00:00:44.929 --> 00:00:47.670
that any trauma that you have that you've buried

00:00:47.670 --> 00:00:50.310
and not dealt with, you think it's okay because

00:00:50.310 --> 00:00:53.109
you haven't dealt with it for years, so you think

00:00:53.109 --> 00:00:56.530
it's gone. When you go into building something

00:00:56.530 --> 00:01:00.170
great and you are having to dip into your greatness

00:01:00.170 --> 00:01:02.990
to get this done, the process of your greatness

00:01:02.990 --> 00:01:05.250
coming up, it's gonna knock against all that

00:01:05.250 --> 00:01:19.000
trauma in there. What's up, fam? Before we get

00:01:19.000 --> 00:01:20.760
into this conversation, let me say this. Look,

00:01:20.819 --> 00:01:23.099
I know it's a thing, right? But if what we do

00:01:23.099 --> 00:01:25.920
here on this channel speaks to you, if it lifts

00:01:25.920 --> 00:01:29.560
you, centers you, or helps you see your life

00:01:29.560 --> 00:01:32.599
a little clearer, I invite you to like the video

00:01:32.599 --> 00:01:35.659
and subscribe so you stay connected. And if you

00:01:35.659 --> 00:01:38.159
want these conversations with you beyond YouTube,

00:01:38.340 --> 00:01:40.640
download the Thrillable Journey podcast on your

00:01:40.640 --> 00:01:43.700
favorite RSS platform. It is a small ass that

00:01:43.700 --> 00:01:46.620
goes a long way, and it really truly helps us

00:01:46.620 --> 00:01:49.680
create the kind of content that doesn't just

00:01:49.680 --> 00:01:53.159
entertain, but actually supports your journey

00:01:53.159 --> 00:01:56.480
of growth and alignment. So hit that like, subscribe.

00:01:57.599 --> 00:02:00.900
Let's breathe in, get present. step into the

00:02:00.900 --> 00:02:04.000
conversation. Again, so I want to welcome you

00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:06.359
Lynette to the Thrivewell Journey podcast. How

00:02:06.359 --> 00:02:08.620
are you doing? I'm doing wonderful. Thank you,

00:02:08.639 --> 00:02:11.819
Michael. Happy to be here. I'm glad you're here.

00:02:12.120 --> 00:02:14.919
And as we said in the green room, you know, it's

00:02:14.919 --> 00:02:19.159
been we've met through Mari Cooper, and we exchanged

00:02:19.159 --> 00:02:21.419
some emails and it's been I think it's been a

00:02:21.419 --> 00:02:25.280
couple months. Yes, it has. Yeah. And now we

00:02:25.280 --> 00:02:28.240
get to actually meet in person and I can tell

00:02:28.240 --> 00:02:31.419
your injury. Of course, I've done research and

00:02:31.419 --> 00:02:33.620
looked at your podcast and things like that.

00:02:34.120 --> 00:02:35.819
And I can tell your injury is really, really

00:02:35.819 --> 00:02:39.060
good and really present. So I'm happy to have

00:02:39.060 --> 00:02:42.560
you on. And one of the things that I wanted to

00:02:42.560 --> 00:02:46.900
know is, in life, we're all reacting and not

00:02:46.900 --> 00:02:48.840
reflecting. So I want to do that one second.

00:02:48.939 --> 00:02:50.819
So I want to know, what was the first time that

00:02:50.819 --> 00:02:52.800
you truly felt that you were connected to your

00:02:52.800 --> 00:02:55.419
purpose? And in that moment, what did it teach

00:02:55.419 --> 00:02:59.740
you? Let's see, the first time I felt I was truly

00:02:59.740 --> 00:03:05.460
connected to my purpose, I would say it was probably

00:03:05.460 --> 00:03:10.259
when I was in my third or fourth podcast episode.

00:03:10.560 --> 00:03:13.419
And it was really after I had done the episode

00:03:13.419 --> 00:03:16.080
and I was speaking with the entrepreneur that

00:03:16.080 --> 00:03:18.479
I had, that was the guest of the episode. And

00:03:18.479 --> 00:03:20.979
she was telling me how she had actually looked

00:03:20.979 --> 00:03:24.939
back at the episode and realized how much she'd

00:03:24.939 --> 00:03:28.990
grown. So I realized because part of the method

00:03:28.990 --> 00:03:31.889
to my madness is that I don't send people questions

00:03:31.889 --> 00:03:34.490
ahead of time. I like for our conversations to

00:03:34.490 --> 00:03:38.349
be organic. And in that way, they're not prepped

00:03:38.349 --> 00:03:41.669
in anticipating what to answer, but they're really

00:03:41.669 --> 00:03:44.169
pulling from in the moment, the truth of that

00:03:44.169 --> 00:03:47.270
moment. So our interview allowed her to really,

00:03:47.270 --> 00:03:49.289
you know, talk about her journey and where she

00:03:49.289 --> 00:03:52.490
had started and where she was now, and she could

00:03:52.490 --> 00:03:55.490
just see her growth by talking about it. Because

00:03:55.490 --> 00:03:58.110
one of the things that I'm really adamant about

00:03:58.110 --> 00:04:01.969
is us taking time to celebrate our wands and

00:04:01.969 --> 00:04:04.430
feel the wands in our body. You know, a lot of

00:04:04.430 --> 00:04:07.370
times when we accomplish things, we jump right

00:04:07.370 --> 00:04:10.770
on to the next thing. So being able to hear from

00:04:10.770 --> 00:04:16.040
her that she, the process of... being on my podcast

00:04:16.040 --> 00:04:20.079
actually gave her the chance to sit in her accomplishments,

00:04:20.519 --> 00:04:24.279
to recognize how much she had accomplished while

00:04:24.279 --> 00:04:26.639
otherwise she was so busy doing the next thing,

00:04:26.660 --> 00:04:30.579
she hadn't recognized it. And that's when I felt

00:04:30.579 --> 00:04:33.939
I was in my purpose because I was like, that's

00:04:33.939 --> 00:04:37.360
what I want to bring to black women entrepreneurs.

00:04:38.000 --> 00:04:40.740
The realization that it's not just about the

00:04:40.740 --> 00:04:44.519
doing. but it's about the giving yourself the

00:04:44.519 --> 00:04:47.939
permission to be proud of what you've accomplished

00:04:47.939 --> 00:04:51.519
as opposed to grind, grind, hustle, hustle all

00:04:51.519 --> 00:04:54.899
the time. Yeah. So that was one of those moments

00:04:54.899 --> 00:04:57.660
when I felt like, okay, that's my purpose because

00:04:57.660 --> 00:04:59.980
tell you the truth, Michael, starting the podcast

00:04:59.980 --> 00:05:03.670
was it was one of those things that I did without

00:05:03.670 --> 00:05:06.370
a lot of contemplation. And I'm a thinking person,

00:05:06.449 --> 00:05:08.569
you know, coming from accounting, I would think

00:05:08.569 --> 00:05:10.949
things, you know, to death, basically, you know,

00:05:11.050 --> 00:05:13.790
why and what and how, but it was kind of like,

00:05:13.990 --> 00:05:16.370
there's some messages that you receive that you

00:05:16.370 --> 00:05:20.300
know. you receive them from a force so much greater

00:05:20.300 --> 00:05:22.939
than you that it's like, how can I question that,

00:05:23.060 --> 00:05:25.699
right? There is no logic to it. There is no,

00:05:25.699 --> 00:05:28.720
you know, there is no way I can connect and say

00:05:28.720 --> 00:05:31.620
this makes sense because, but this feels right.

00:05:32.620 --> 00:05:35.120
So the calling to start the podcast was something

00:05:35.120 --> 00:05:37.740
that just felt right. It wasn't, it wasn't a

00:05:37.740 --> 00:05:39.899
natural part of my personality. It wasn't something

00:05:39.899 --> 00:05:42.480
I ever thought of doing, but it just felt right.

00:05:42.560 --> 00:05:45.120
So I just get it, right. Without knowing a lot

00:05:45.120 --> 00:05:50.399
of stuff. But that mom with her kind of giving

00:05:50.399 --> 00:05:52.879
me her reflection of what she saw and heard,

00:05:52.920 --> 00:05:56.759
her own story, just solidified for me, like,

00:05:56.959 --> 00:05:58.620
yeah, you're in the right space doing the right

00:05:58.620 --> 00:06:01.560
thing. And this is the purpose of why you're

00:06:01.560 --> 00:06:04.579
doing it. Well, I think that's great because

00:06:04.579 --> 00:06:07.079
you talked about, well, first of all, yeah, I

00:06:07.079 --> 00:06:09.680
know exactly what you're talking about when I

00:06:09.680 --> 00:06:13.240
was sitting at this very spot and kind of placed

00:06:13.240 --> 00:06:16.389
you some things about my business and All of

00:06:16.389 --> 00:06:19.769
a sudden, you know, I will, you know, as an actor,

00:06:19.810 --> 00:06:21.389
you know, that's one thing, but then trying to

00:06:21.389 --> 00:06:23.569
do a podcast, that's a whole, that's a business,

00:06:23.629 --> 00:06:26.189
that's a whole world. I wasn't even interested

00:06:26.189 --> 00:06:29.769
in doing this. But like you said, something greater

00:06:29.769 --> 00:06:32.110
was like, yeah, here you go. Here's a little

00:06:32.110 --> 00:06:36.509
push. Right. And along the way, you know, you

00:06:36.509 --> 00:06:39.230
figure things out, you get, you know, tested

00:06:39.230 --> 00:06:41.750
and tried and knowledge and, you know, and all

00:06:41.750 --> 00:06:44.050
that good stuff. And you find yourself, you know,

00:06:44.149 --> 00:06:46.410
doing something that you love, which is really

00:06:46.410 --> 00:06:50.670
great. And you talked about really celebrating

00:06:50.670 --> 00:06:53.970
your wins. And I think that you hit something

00:06:53.970 --> 00:06:56.470
really big there. And we're going to talk about

00:06:56.470 --> 00:06:59.329
really focus on Black women entrepreneurs. Do

00:06:59.329 --> 00:07:03.850
you really feel that they're in a hole? People,

00:07:04.170 --> 00:07:06.110
Black women entrepreneurs are not celebrating

00:07:06.110 --> 00:07:09.269
their wins as the ones that you come across?

00:07:09.830 --> 00:07:12.629
Yeah, I do, because, and it's interesting because

00:07:12.629 --> 00:07:15.089
no matter where they are in their journey, whether

00:07:15.089 --> 00:07:17.709
if they just started or if they've been doing

00:07:17.709 --> 00:07:22.089
it for decades, I have to find that their mind

00:07:22.089 --> 00:07:24.410
is, and I can really relate to it, their mind

00:07:24.410 --> 00:07:26.730
is forward thinking to the next thing, you know,

00:07:26.730 --> 00:07:30.110
the next hurdle. Like, yeah, I just got over

00:07:30.110 --> 00:07:33.009
this hurdle and I accomplished this, but there's

00:07:33.009 --> 00:07:34.889
something else waiting that I got to get to.

00:07:35.170 --> 00:07:38.829
And they don't take that pause to say, you know,

00:07:38.910 --> 00:07:42.610
you... Do you recall how tough this scene when

00:07:42.610 --> 00:07:45.470
you first started this hurdle and now you're

00:07:45.470 --> 00:07:48.370
on the other side of it? So catch your breath,

00:07:48.750 --> 00:07:51.250
you know, do a little rejoicing, realize you

00:07:51.250 --> 00:07:54.689
have grown, how you've grown, what you've accomplished,

00:07:55.069 --> 00:07:59.230
let that digest because the big thing that we

00:07:59.230 --> 00:08:02.110
don't realize is that we we're feeding our nervous

00:08:02.110 --> 00:08:06.550
system the experience a constant struggle. a

00:08:06.550 --> 00:08:09.870
constant challenge and we're not feeding it the

00:08:09.870 --> 00:08:13.509
experience of a success, right? So then our mind

00:08:13.509 --> 00:08:17.170
and our nervous system are so in tune with struggling

00:08:17.170 --> 00:08:21.449
and challenges that have you heard, I'm sure

00:08:21.449 --> 00:08:23.990
you and your audience have heard people say they

00:08:23.990 --> 00:08:26.230
had a goal and then when they finally reached

00:08:26.230 --> 00:08:28.129
the goal, they got there and they felt empty.

00:08:28.790 --> 00:08:31.269
But all the way to there, they were telling themselves,

00:08:31.449 --> 00:08:34.230
when I get here, it's gonna be great. When I

00:08:34.230 --> 00:08:36.629
get here, you know, everything is going to be

00:08:36.629 --> 00:08:39.269
beautiful. But when they got there, it wasn't.

00:08:39.309 --> 00:08:42.450
And that's because all the way to there, they

00:08:42.450 --> 00:08:46.370
were full of stress, struggle, strife, you know,

00:08:46.690 --> 00:08:48.870
impossibility, how I'm going to get this done.

00:08:49.149 --> 00:08:52.970
So when they got it done, they arrived with a

00:08:52.970 --> 00:08:56.370
nervous system full of all that old energy. They

00:08:56.370 --> 00:08:59.110
didn't let a new energy settle in. And usually

00:08:59.110 --> 00:09:01.610
they still don't. What they do is jump to, OK,

00:09:01.690 --> 00:09:04.210
well, it looks to be something else I need to

00:09:04.210 --> 00:09:07.259
do. When I get to that next goal, then I'm going

00:09:07.259 --> 00:09:10.179
to feel content. So they never let it settle

00:09:10.179 --> 00:09:13.980
in. They just jump to something else. And that's

00:09:13.980 --> 00:09:17.179
the issue. At that point, you're not feeling

00:09:17.179 --> 00:09:19.639
peace. I think one of the greatest things you

00:09:19.639 --> 00:09:21.700
said is like you're on the journey to get into

00:09:21.700 --> 00:09:25.299
that spot. You're filled with all this old energy,

00:09:25.519 --> 00:09:29.720
the angst, the anxiety, the, you know, the unfulfillment

00:09:29.720 --> 00:09:31.340
until you get to that space and you think you're

00:09:31.340 --> 00:09:33.909
going to be fulfilled. and then you're not because

00:09:33.909 --> 00:09:37.669
you still carry that old energy. What do you

00:09:37.669 --> 00:09:42.470
think that people should do on that journey to

00:09:42.470 --> 00:09:47.809
a goal in order to arrive fulfilled? One thing

00:09:47.809 --> 00:09:51.250
they can do is break that goal down into small

00:09:51.250 --> 00:09:55.850
wins, right? Most goals have a lot of moving

00:09:55.850 --> 00:09:59.220
parts. So let's say it's... It's five to 10 things

00:09:59.220 --> 00:10:01.240
you have to complete to get to that goal, or

00:10:01.240 --> 00:10:04.240
you have to accomplish. Break that down into

00:10:04.240 --> 00:10:06.379
wins. Okay, when I get the first thing done,

00:10:06.419 --> 00:10:10.500
that's a win. If your goal is starting my own

00:10:10.500 --> 00:10:15.559
business, break that down to getting my business

00:10:15.559 --> 00:10:20.100
registered. That's a win, right? I paid, I got

00:10:20.100 --> 00:10:23.940
it registered, I got my EIN number. Getting my

00:10:23.940 --> 00:10:26.269
business bank account open. That's the wind.

00:10:26.370 --> 00:10:29.289
I found the right bank to work with. Didn't have

00:10:29.289 --> 00:10:32.590
a lot of fees. That's great. I started the bank

00:10:32.590 --> 00:10:36.009
account. Good, right? Then the next step, like

00:10:36.009 --> 00:10:39.269
as you go through these steps, you have to let

00:10:39.269 --> 00:10:44.350
the wind sit in. So make your, break your big

00:10:44.350 --> 00:10:47.590
target down to smaller pieces. And then when

00:10:47.590 --> 00:10:49.889
you accomplish those smaller pieces, let that

00:10:49.889 --> 00:10:53.059
wind sit in. and then go to the next thing, but

00:10:53.059 --> 00:10:55.059
don't just jump, but okay, I got it, what's tending

00:10:55.059 --> 00:10:58.340
to do, let me go one, two, you know, get one

00:10:58.340 --> 00:11:01.580
done, let it settle in, breathe, just pause and

00:11:01.580 --> 00:11:04.600
breathe, I got that. Let me check it out. Then

00:11:04.600 --> 00:11:06.639
you get the next one done. Get the next one done.

00:11:06.700 --> 00:11:10.200
What do you say to women who just, they just

00:11:10.200 --> 00:11:11.840
feel like they gotta just always get it done

00:11:11.840 --> 00:11:16.659
though? Like they - I say, right, I say that's

00:11:16.659 --> 00:11:20.600
not sustainable. Okay. That's not sustainable.

00:11:21.070 --> 00:11:24.769
it's gonna lead to burnout, and you're not feeding

00:11:24.769 --> 00:11:28.149
your purpose, you're not feeding your soul. So

00:11:28.149 --> 00:11:31.090
you're in this, right? We go into a business

00:11:31.090 --> 00:11:34.470
to create something or to provide a service because

00:11:34.470 --> 00:11:36.990
there's a passion, there's a reason behind it,

00:11:36.990 --> 00:11:39.909
there's a purpose behind it. So think about this,

00:11:39.929 --> 00:11:43.590
if I show up to the thing that I feel like is

00:11:43.590 --> 00:11:46.070
my purpose, the purpose of my soul, the purpose

00:11:46.070 --> 00:11:50.269
of me being here, and I show up empty of energy,

00:11:50.519 --> 00:11:55.559
Empty of creativity, body worn out and worn down,

00:11:56.200 --> 00:12:00.580
spirit exhausted. How great am I serving that

00:12:00.580 --> 00:12:04.259
purpose? How great is what I'm producing and

00:12:04.259 --> 00:12:07.700
what I'm giving going to be versus if I show

00:12:07.700 --> 00:12:10.980
up well rested, if I show up having poured into

00:12:10.980 --> 00:12:15.419
my spirit, if I show up full of energy and creativity.

00:12:15.679 --> 00:12:19.159
What I mean, what is the difference in what I'm

00:12:19.159 --> 00:12:22.220
going to be able to give and create? So pausing

00:12:22.220 --> 00:12:25.399
to acknowledge those wins and let them sit in

00:12:25.399 --> 00:12:29.059
your system is showing up full of energy, showing

00:12:29.059 --> 00:12:31.519
up full of creativity, showing up with your soul

00:12:31.519 --> 00:12:35.240
field versus running from one thing to the next,

00:12:35.320 --> 00:12:37.840
to the next, to the next is showing up burnt

00:12:37.840 --> 00:12:42.179
out. with low energy, low creativity. You couldn't

00:12:42.179 --> 00:12:44.759
even hear a solution if it was yelling in your

00:12:44.759 --> 00:12:47.779
ear, right? Because you're so, you're so worn

00:12:47.779 --> 00:12:51.879
out, burnt out. And another thing, Michael, I

00:12:51.879 --> 00:12:54.759
discovered along my journey that black women

00:12:54.759 --> 00:12:57.379
-owned businesses are the fastest growing sector

00:12:57.379 --> 00:13:01.240
of new businesses, but our success rate of lasting

00:13:01.240 --> 00:13:09.159
to five years is 3%. That means 97 % of our businesses

00:13:09.159 --> 00:13:12.559
that start do not make it to five years. A big

00:13:12.559 --> 00:13:15.840
part of that is the burnout. A big part of that

00:13:15.840 --> 00:13:19.940
is the way we're doing things lead us to start

00:13:19.940 --> 00:13:22.399
feeling like, why am I doing this? This is too

00:13:22.399 --> 00:13:26.120
much. I'm not getting where I want to be. It's

00:13:26.120 --> 00:13:30.019
not feeling like I thought it would feel. I mean,

00:13:30.139 --> 00:13:34.379
97 % where the industry average is between 40

00:13:34.379 --> 00:13:37.759
to 50 for all businesses. It's between 40 to

00:13:37.759 --> 00:13:40.340
50 % that don't make it five years. We're at

00:13:40.340 --> 00:13:45.460
97%. That's wild. Yeah. That's wild. And these

00:13:45.460 --> 00:13:49.580
are people that have dreams. Exactly. These are

00:13:49.580 --> 00:13:52.120
people who have dreams. These are people who

00:13:52.120 --> 00:13:55.100
want financial freedom, people who want to change

00:13:55.100 --> 00:13:58.059
the world, people who have decided, I don't want

00:13:58.059 --> 00:14:01.440
to boss. people who have full of creativity and

00:14:01.440 --> 00:14:04.100
talent that they want to put to use and serve

00:14:04.100 --> 00:14:07.759
the world with. And they are at record numbers

00:14:07.759 --> 00:14:11.120
going out and starting businesses, but at record

00:14:11.120 --> 00:14:14.679
numbers not succeeding. Yeah. What's the answer

00:14:14.679 --> 00:14:18.500
for that? The answer for that is I think a combination

00:14:18.500 --> 00:14:22.039
of learning how to take care of ourselves. And

00:14:22.039 --> 00:14:24.419
I put that under the umbrella of radical self

00:14:24.419 --> 00:14:30.379
-love. Self -acceptance. self -care, self -awareness,

00:14:30.639 --> 00:14:34.679
and self -expression, right? So for us, part

00:14:34.679 --> 00:14:38.480
of it means changing the way we think about how

00:14:38.480 --> 00:14:42.259
to get to success. There's a lot in social media

00:14:42.259 --> 00:14:44.940
that we should ignore. I'm gonna say that again.

00:14:45.139 --> 00:14:49.039
There's a lot in social media that we as entrepreneurs

00:14:49.039 --> 00:14:52.340
should ignore because it's not realistic, it's

00:14:52.340 --> 00:14:55.779
not sustainable, it's not healthy for you. One

00:14:55.779 --> 00:14:59.539
big thing is this hustle and grind culture that

00:14:59.539 --> 00:15:02.539
puts in our mind that if we're not doing something

00:15:02.539 --> 00:15:05.600
every minute of the day, like, I hate the phrase,

00:15:05.679 --> 00:15:09.700
I will sleep when I'm dead. You won't sleep when

00:15:09.700 --> 00:15:13.120
you're dead, you'll be dead. Right? Right? Right?

00:15:13.580 --> 00:15:16.019
No sleep, I sleep when I'm dead. No, your body

00:15:16.019 --> 00:15:18.559
needs you to sleep now. Because when you're dead,

00:15:18.700 --> 00:15:21.529
you won't be doing anything, right? So... Throw

00:15:21.529 --> 00:15:24.750
that nonsense out. Hustle and grind. Throw that

00:15:24.750 --> 00:15:28.330
nonsense out. The sacrifices that our ancestors

00:15:28.330 --> 00:15:31.210
made for us to be here was not so we would be

00:15:31.210 --> 00:15:35.269
working as endlessly as they were forced to work,

00:15:35.389 --> 00:15:38.409
right? So throw that nonsense out. There's a

00:15:38.409 --> 00:15:41.889
smarter and better way to do anything. So embrace

00:15:41.889 --> 00:15:44.970
ease. You know, sometimes you feel like ease

00:15:44.970 --> 00:15:47.809
and easy are bad words and it has to be hard

00:15:47.809 --> 00:15:50.940
and tough. That's not true. It's hard and tough

00:15:50.940 --> 00:15:54.840
if you're trying to do it all yourself, right?

00:15:55.539 --> 00:15:57.759
So we have to come to the realization that we

00:15:57.759 --> 00:16:00.899
can't build it all by ourselves. We may start

00:16:00.899 --> 00:16:05.600
as a solopreneur, but we have to think forward

00:16:05.600 --> 00:16:08.259
in a way of, okay, who can I add to my team or

00:16:08.259 --> 00:16:12.379
what do I need to add to my team to do things

00:16:12.379 --> 00:16:14.899
more efficiently where I'm not having to do everything

00:16:14.899 --> 00:16:18.480
all the time. Right. So let me think about let

00:16:18.480 --> 00:16:20.960
me talk about mentality when you talk about I

00:16:20.960 --> 00:16:24.320
don't have to do it all myself Growing up with

00:16:24.320 --> 00:16:26.720
you know, just single black mom, you know, I

00:16:26.720 --> 00:16:28.679
had my dad but he was in the house You know,

00:16:28.740 --> 00:16:31.700
she was always doing it. Do you think that? Generationally

00:16:31.700 --> 00:16:35.000
that that whole mentality has come along where

00:16:35.000 --> 00:16:37.700
you know, I'm a black woman I got to get this

00:16:37.700 --> 00:16:39.820
not I got to do this and I got to do it on my

00:16:39.820 --> 00:16:43.340
own and if that's the case How do you shift that

00:16:43.340 --> 00:16:47.860
mentality to? You know I can build something

00:16:47.860 --> 00:16:50.399
and I can build it with a team and I can trust,

00:16:50.399 --> 00:16:53.279
you know, and a team to help me get this business

00:16:53.279 --> 00:16:57.419
up the ground and get it done. Yes. I do think

00:16:57.419 --> 00:17:00.120
that that generational process is definitely

00:17:00.120 --> 00:17:04.059
plays into this, right? If we've seen so much

00:17:04.059 --> 00:17:09.000
struggle and that has been our experience, then

00:17:09.000 --> 00:17:12.299
we have embodied that experience and we are reliving

00:17:12.299 --> 00:17:15.519
that experience. So one thing I would say is

00:17:15.519 --> 00:17:19.920
look at any successful business, any business

00:17:19.920 --> 00:17:23.839
that's successful, that is attractive to you,

00:17:24.420 --> 00:17:27.500
and dig into that business and see how many people

00:17:27.500 --> 00:17:30.480
are part of that business being successful. You're

00:17:30.480 --> 00:17:33.420
gonna find out there are departments full of

00:17:33.420 --> 00:17:36.400
different people in those departments, headed

00:17:36.400 --> 00:17:40.319
by people who specialize in those areas, and

00:17:40.319 --> 00:17:45.930
the CEO the figurehead of the business is not

00:17:45.930 --> 00:17:49.069
doing the day -to -day work of that business.

00:17:49.769 --> 00:17:52.690
They drew that business to a point where they

00:17:52.690 --> 00:17:55.769
have a team doing that day -to -day work. And

00:17:55.769 --> 00:17:58.630
they are more strategically planning in that

00:17:58.630 --> 00:18:01.630
business. So embrace that, that's where you want

00:18:01.630 --> 00:18:05.410
to get to. Like release the thought pattern that

00:18:05.410 --> 00:18:07.329
everything has to be done with your hands because

00:18:07.329 --> 00:18:10.299
you limit yourself. You limit yourself when you're

00:18:10.299 --> 00:18:12.539
thinking, I have to touch everything in this

00:18:12.539 --> 00:18:15.039
business to make it successful. You can't expand

00:18:15.039 --> 00:18:17.220
and grow like that. You can't scale like that

00:18:17.220 --> 00:18:20.380
because you only have 24 hours a day. And part

00:18:20.380 --> 00:18:22.619
of that, you have to rest and do other things.

00:18:22.700 --> 00:18:25.460
So if your business depends on only the energy

00:18:25.460 --> 00:18:28.200
you can put into it, it's not going to last too

00:18:28.200 --> 00:18:31.000
long. It's not going to scale. So you have to

00:18:31.000 --> 00:18:33.859
be able to embrace the concept of thinking of

00:18:33.859 --> 00:18:37.180
business building differently. How do I build

00:18:37.180 --> 00:18:40.019
a sustainable business where I put systems in

00:18:40.019 --> 00:18:43.599
place so that as I grow my business revenue,

00:18:44.000 --> 00:18:46.140
I already have it plotted out the first three

00:18:46.140 --> 00:18:49.559
positions I'm going to add. It can be a freelancer.

00:18:50.000 --> 00:18:53.039
It can be a consultant. But I have those positions

00:18:53.039 --> 00:18:56.339
plotted out. I've researched how much it's going

00:18:56.339 --> 00:18:59.319
to cost to pay those positions. So when my income,

00:18:59.579 --> 00:19:01.500
my revenue gets to a certain level, I'm going

00:19:01.500 --> 00:19:04.730
to bring those people on board. Right. So the

00:19:04.730 --> 00:19:07.190
things that I'm not strong in doing, because

00:19:07.190 --> 00:19:10.569
don't think for one minute that you are great

00:19:10.569 --> 00:19:12.670
at doing everything your business needs. You're

00:19:12.670 --> 00:19:15.910
not. You can say that. Right? You are not great

00:19:15.910 --> 00:19:18.250
at doing everything your business needs. You

00:19:18.250 --> 00:19:21.569
are great at your core genius, that core talent,

00:19:21.769 --> 00:19:25.869
that core skill you have. Because of design,

00:19:26.490 --> 00:19:28.509
usually you have to start out doing everything.

00:19:28.869 --> 00:19:31.930
Right. That's because of design. That's not where

00:19:31.930 --> 00:19:34.009
you want it to end up. That's just the beginning.

00:19:34.450 --> 00:19:36.210
In the beginning, you're wearing all the hats.

00:19:36.369 --> 00:19:38.730
You're doing your marketing. You're doing your

00:19:38.730 --> 00:19:42.190
business planning. You're dealing with your bookkeeping,

00:19:42.509 --> 00:19:45.710
managing your money. You're doing all the creativity.

00:19:46.029 --> 00:19:48.890
You're doing the networking. But you don't want

00:19:48.890 --> 00:19:51.809
that to be your system forever. That's one stage

00:19:51.809 --> 00:19:54.349
of your business. The next stage of your business

00:19:54.349 --> 00:19:59.109
is figuring out what key activities am I doing

00:19:59.109 --> 00:20:01.950
that either I don't like or I'm not strong in

00:20:01.950 --> 00:20:05.589
that I want to bring someone in to do that for

00:20:05.589 --> 00:20:08.829
me. Yes. And how am I going to pay for that?

00:20:08.849 --> 00:20:10.869
So I need to get this revenue up so I can pay

00:20:10.869 --> 00:20:13.890
for that. Get that off my plate. Open up some

00:20:13.890 --> 00:20:16.329
space so I can start thinking more strategically

00:20:16.329 --> 00:20:19.329
about my business. Putting systems in place so

00:20:19.329 --> 00:20:21.670
when those people come on board, this is how

00:20:21.670 --> 00:20:24.230
this is done. And if they have a more efficient

00:20:24.230 --> 00:20:26.349
way to do it, great. That's why I hired you.

00:20:26.410 --> 00:20:28.849
This is how I was doing it when it was only me

00:20:28.849 --> 00:20:32.730
and I used chat GPT and I used Google. This is

00:20:32.730 --> 00:20:34.849
what I figured out. But okay, you already got

00:20:34.849 --> 00:20:37.789
something together that would help it be easier

00:20:37.789 --> 00:20:41.190
and quicker, more efficient, produce more revenue.

00:20:41.690 --> 00:20:43.809
Come on board. That's what I'm paying you for.

00:20:44.289 --> 00:20:46.230
That's how we have to think about our business

00:20:46.230 --> 00:20:49.789
as, okay, the starting stage is going to be just

00:20:49.789 --> 00:20:52.869
me doing these things, but that's not forever.

00:20:54.650 --> 00:20:57.329
It's one of the biggest things that I've learned

00:20:57.329 --> 00:21:02.529
throughout my journey as an entrepreneur is give

00:21:02.529 --> 00:21:07.950
things away. It's okay. Give it away. It's okay.

00:21:08.750 --> 00:21:12.349
Work on your business, not always in your business.

00:21:13.430 --> 00:21:17.250
Allow yourself to grow as a leader, as a founder,

00:21:17.589 --> 00:21:20.369
so that you can create space, not only for you,

00:21:20.589 --> 00:21:23.690
but for you to grow so you can grow the business

00:21:23.690 --> 00:21:26.410
for other people to come in and be fortunate

00:21:26.410 --> 00:21:28.250
and get the jobs that they want and that they

00:21:28.250 --> 00:21:31.970
love doing. Exactly. Right. And I love what you

00:21:31.970 --> 00:21:34.829
said, work on your business and not just in your

00:21:34.829 --> 00:21:38.430
business. And that's a distinction I think we

00:21:38.430 --> 00:21:41.109
need to let people sit with for a minute, because

00:21:41.109 --> 00:21:43.549
working in your business is you doing all the

00:21:43.549 --> 00:21:46.309
tasks, right? This has to be done. That has to

00:21:46.309 --> 00:21:48.930
be done. This has to be paid. I have to post

00:21:48.930 --> 00:21:52.289
this. on your business is what is my strategic

00:21:52.289 --> 00:21:55.769
strategic plan for the next year right what are

00:21:55.769 --> 00:21:59.490
my goals in these areas that's working on your

00:21:59.490 --> 00:22:02.690
business the planning part of your business the

00:22:02.690 --> 00:22:05.109
strategies of your business as opposed to doing

00:22:05.109 --> 00:22:08.009
tasks ladies check this out because you're gonna

00:22:08.009 --> 00:22:11.589
like what i'm about to say fellas let's talk

00:22:11.589 --> 00:22:15.440
about it energy your energy the kind that fuels

00:22:15.440 --> 00:22:18.579
your focus, your drive, and your confidence in

00:22:18.579 --> 00:22:21.299
every area of life. So, when I started using

00:22:21.299 --> 00:22:24.880
the U Shaman Milk Potency Elixir created by my

00:22:24.880 --> 00:22:27.240
brother, Celestino Corneal, I noticed something

00:22:27.240 --> 00:22:30.579
shift. My clarity sharpened, my stamina rose,

00:22:30.720 --> 00:22:34.380
my focus locked in, and whether I'm training,

00:22:34.559 --> 00:22:37.279
creating, or pulling into my purpose, I just

00:22:37.279 --> 00:22:39.980
feel alive. And here's the thing, this isn't

00:22:39.980 --> 00:22:42.339
about hype or shortcuts, it's about alignment.

00:22:42.640 --> 00:22:45.839
You know, when your body, your mind, and your

00:22:45.839 --> 00:22:48.079
spirit are connected, you move through the world

00:22:48.079 --> 00:22:51.160
differently, right? You lead differently, and

00:22:51.160 --> 00:22:54.400
you definitely love differently. So that's what

00:22:54.400 --> 00:22:57.059
this elixir was designed for, to support blood

00:22:57.059 --> 00:23:01.720
flow, endurance, and presence, so you can show

00:23:01.720 --> 00:23:06.579
up stronger, centered, and inflow every single

00:23:06.579 --> 00:23:09.319
day. So if you're ready to recharge your energy,

00:23:09.579 --> 00:23:11.380
restore your balance, and reclaim your power,

00:23:11.799 --> 00:23:15.559
go to ushaman .com forward slash elixir to use

00:23:15.559 --> 00:23:19.019
code THRIVEWELL for 10 % off your order. That's

00:23:19.019 --> 00:23:23.440
ushaman .com forward slash elixir. Step into

00:23:23.440 --> 00:23:26.359
your sacred strength today. The link and the

00:23:26.359 --> 00:23:29.269
code is in the show notes. Check it out. I got

00:23:29.269 --> 00:23:32.809
that because I was being a podcast host. I was

00:23:32.809 --> 00:23:34.970
listening to people, listening to people like

00:23:34.970 --> 00:23:36.609
you. And I'm like, oh, let me take, let me take

00:23:36.609 --> 00:23:40.569
a little bit of that. Right. And use it. Right.

00:23:40.990 --> 00:23:44.970
Use it for me. Wonderful. Wonderful. Now I want

00:23:44.970 --> 00:23:47.829
to go back because you are, you're really, your

00:23:47.829 --> 00:23:50.210
mission is deeply rooted for my research and

00:23:50.210 --> 00:23:54.150
everything with Sisterhood. What role does community

00:23:54.150 --> 00:23:57.309
play in like your own healing and your business

00:23:57.309 --> 00:23:59.940
growth? Since we're talking about that can really

00:23:59.940 --> 00:24:02.740
place a big part just like you mentioned Michael

00:24:02.740 --> 00:24:06.599
from being on the podcast and just Talking to

00:24:06.599 --> 00:24:09.339
entrepreneurs you learn so much right because

00:24:09.339 --> 00:24:13.299
you realize that you Don't know it also. I have

00:24:13.299 --> 00:24:16.200
met so many brilliant black women through my

00:24:16.200 --> 00:24:20.200
podcast and learned so much from them that it

00:24:20.200 --> 00:24:24.039
is just amazing and And I love the process that

00:24:24.039 --> 00:24:26.640
I'm able to bring all that intelligence and all

00:24:26.640 --> 00:24:29.700
that experience for other black women entrepreneurs

00:24:29.700 --> 00:24:33.039
to tap into. The reason I started the podcast

00:24:33.039 --> 00:24:37.250
was because I had started a business in... I

00:24:37.250 --> 00:24:41.109
was going to all three workshops, the SBA, the

00:24:41.109 --> 00:24:43.910
SCORE, all these workshops, and following the

00:24:43.910 --> 00:24:46.650
steps they gave you to do. Do one, two, three,

00:24:46.670 --> 00:24:49.150
and you'll get to four and five. And I was doing

00:24:49.150 --> 00:24:51.490
one, two, three, and four and five wasn't happening

00:24:51.490 --> 00:24:55.450
for me. So I was like, I need... to be able to

00:24:55.450 --> 00:24:57.529
speak to some black women entrepreneurs to find

00:24:57.529 --> 00:24:59.630
out what are they doing to get the four and five?

00:24:59.910 --> 00:25:02.950
Like how they be creative? Why is this not working

00:25:02.950 --> 00:25:05.549
for me? You know, what am I not doing and what

00:25:05.549 --> 00:25:08.170
are they doing differently? And I really couldn't

00:25:08.170 --> 00:25:12.349
find a resource for that. And then I uncovered

00:25:12.349 --> 00:25:15.690
the 97 % failure rate of black women on businesses.

00:25:15.769 --> 00:25:18.549
And I was like, so I know there's other sisters

00:25:18.549 --> 00:25:21.849
out there like me searching for a resource to

00:25:21.849 --> 00:25:24.829
get this information from. And that's why I created

00:25:24.829 --> 00:25:28.690
the podcast, because I want to ask the questions

00:25:28.690 --> 00:25:32.869
that I know we need answers to, that you can't

00:25:32.869 --> 00:25:35.250
get at a networking event. You can't walk up

00:25:35.250 --> 00:25:38.089
to a new stranger and ask them these type of

00:25:38.089 --> 00:25:40.809
questions and have them be honest with you, Ron.

00:25:41.269 --> 00:25:43.769
Because there's so much dishonest information

00:25:43.769 --> 00:25:46.980
out there. on social media. So what community

00:25:46.980 --> 00:25:51.960
does is it gives you those honest answers. Sisterhood,

00:25:52.180 --> 00:25:54.940
it gives you that support that you can't find

00:25:54.940 --> 00:25:58.099
anywhere else. I have a group, Black Women Blooming,

00:25:58.299 --> 00:26:00.660
that I have where we come together for community

00:26:00.660 --> 00:26:04.759
and we work on radical self -love. It's just

00:26:04.759 --> 00:26:06.960
Black women entrepreneurs sharing their stories,

00:26:07.259 --> 00:26:10.500
sharing their journey, and learning how to do

00:26:10.500 --> 00:26:12.640
business differently. Like all the things we're

00:26:12.640 --> 00:26:15.400
talking about here, learning how to do those

00:26:15.400 --> 00:26:18.759
things differently. And it's just impactful,

00:26:19.059 --> 00:26:22.420
the power and energy you can feel in a room when

00:26:22.420 --> 00:26:24.500
Black women get together helping each other,

00:26:24.579 --> 00:26:26.500
right? And you're allowed to come in the room

00:26:26.500 --> 00:26:28.640
feeling however you feel, right? You don't have

00:26:28.640 --> 00:26:32.500
to feel happy and joyful and positive every day

00:26:32.500 --> 00:26:35.940
you show up. However you show up is fine, because

00:26:35.940 --> 00:26:38.839
you have permission to be a real person, right?

00:26:38.839 --> 00:26:41.200
So you can show up feeling tired and exhausted.

00:26:41.450 --> 00:26:44.150
And that's fine, right? We can talk about that.

00:26:44.150 --> 00:26:47.289
We can move through that. So community is very

00:26:47.289 --> 00:26:50.829
key. I would advise, because entrepreneurship

00:26:50.829 --> 00:26:53.430
can be a very long journey because we're not

00:26:53.430 --> 00:26:56.049
surrounded naturally by other entrepreneurs.

00:26:56.230 --> 00:27:00.170
We are surrounded by other employees. It's a

00:27:00.170 --> 00:27:02.950
different mindset. It's a different conversation.

00:27:03.410 --> 00:27:05.589
There are certain things that they would not

00:27:05.589 --> 00:27:08.269
understand about your new journey, right? And

00:27:08.269 --> 00:27:12.559
that's just a fact. Get into a community with

00:27:12.559 --> 00:27:16.440
like -minded people, and you will be amazed at

00:27:16.440 --> 00:27:19.420
the level of growth you can experience. Yeah.

00:27:19.720 --> 00:27:22.000
Yeah. You know, one of the things I've been learning

00:27:22.000 --> 00:27:27.019
is that success on the outside, externally, really

00:27:27.019 --> 00:27:30.859
relates to who you are internally. And you're

00:27:30.859 --> 00:27:33.000
talking about radical self -love. How did that

00:27:33.000 --> 00:27:35.460
show for you in your early days in your entrepreneurial

00:27:35.460 --> 00:27:38.920
journey? It showed up at realizing that... there

00:27:38.920 --> 00:27:43.420
was more to building a business than just doing

00:27:43.420 --> 00:27:48.440
tasks. It had to be, I had to also honor the

00:27:48.440 --> 00:27:52.019
person that I am. I had to honor the things that

00:27:52.019 --> 00:27:54.740
we often neglect when we're either working really

00:27:54.740 --> 00:27:58.779
hard at a job, right, for somebody else, or giving

00:27:58.779 --> 00:28:01.700
to others before we think about what we need.

00:28:01.960 --> 00:28:06.180
The concept that being sacrificial is rewarded.

00:28:06.519 --> 00:28:09.759
Like, we're generally, in this society, rewarded

00:28:09.759 --> 00:28:14.059
for burnout activities, right, for going above

00:28:14.059 --> 00:28:15.940
and beyond. Even though you need to rest, I worked

00:28:15.940 --> 00:28:18.599
all night and got the stun for you. Right. I

00:28:18.599 --> 00:28:20.619
didn't sleep. I got this stuff. Oh, thank you

00:28:20.619 --> 00:28:23.720
so much. That's applauded and rewarded. That's

00:28:23.720 --> 00:28:27.220
not good, right? So I had to break a lot of bad

00:28:27.220 --> 00:28:31.579
habits and realize, okay, how do I honor myself

00:28:31.579 --> 00:28:34.920
and still build a successful business? How do

00:28:34.920 --> 00:28:38.349
I honor myself One of the things that I say,

00:28:38.349 --> 00:28:40.289
entrepreneurship is a very spiritual journey

00:28:40.289 --> 00:28:43.609
because I firmly believe that any trauma that

00:28:43.609 --> 00:28:46.089
you have that you've buried and not dealt with,

00:28:46.329 --> 00:28:49.450
you think it's okay because you haven't dealt

00:28:49.450 --> 00:28:51.750
with it for years, so you think it's gone. When

00:28:51.750 --> 00:28:55.970
you go into building something great and you

00:28:55.970 --> 00:28:59.210
are having to dip into your greatness to get

00:28:59.210 --> 00:29:01.849
this done, the process of your greatness coming

00:29:01.849 --> 00:29:04.029
up, it's gonna knock against all that trauma

00:29:04.029 --> 00:29:06.490
in there. Yeah, and it's not say you need to

00:29:06.490 --> 00:29:09.349
get this out the way before I can come out You

00:29:09.349 --> 00:29:11.230
need to heal this before I can come out. You

00:29:11.230 --> 00:29:13.109
need to start working on this stuff before I

00:29:13.109 --> 00:29:17.309
can come out, right? So when those things start

00:29:17.309 --> 00:29:19.509
you start knocking up against those things and

00:29:19.509 --> 00:29:21.369
you're trying to do something great and you feel

00:29:21.369 --> 00:29:24.089
yourself Why do I keep going back to the same

00:29:24.089 --> 00:29:27.349
place and I'm trying to get go forward It's because

00:29:27.349 --> 00:29:29.529
there's something you need to pause and deal

00:29:29.529 --> 00:29:31.549
with you need to figure out what that is I say

00:29:31.549 --> 00:29:35.839
every Every human needs a therapist. Every entrepreneur

00:29:35.839 --> 00:29:38.579
needs a therapist and a coach. The therapist

00:29:38.579 --> 00:29:40.839
to help you deal with the things from your past

00:29:40.839 --> 00:29:43.160
that are going to come up that you haven't dealt

00:29:43.160 --> 00:29:45.940
with. The coach to help you move your business

00:29:45.940 --> 00:29:48.700
forward for the blind spots you're not going

00:29:48.700 --> 00:29:51.000
to see and the accountability you're not going

00:29:51.000 --> 00:29:55.440
to hold yourself to. Really great. Right. So,

00:29:56.039 --> 00:30:00.549
yes. No, go ahead, go ahead. So in my own experience,

00:30:00.890 --> 00:30:04.390
I found as I was building a business and trying

00:30:04.390 --> 00:30:07.589
to achieve greatness in that business, I was

00:30:07.589 --> 00:30:09.990
knocking up against unresolved things within

00:30:09.990 --> 00:30:12.329
myself that I had to stop and deal with. It was

00:30:12.329 --> 00:30:14.369
like, we can't go any further until you deal

00:30:14.369 --> 00:30:16.950
with this. And we often think it's disconnected.

00:30:17.190 --> 00:30:20.170
The business is one thing and then your personal

00:30:20.170 --> 00:30:23.230
is something else, but it's all you. Especially

00:30:23.230 --> 00:30:27.059
as a solopreneur, your business is all you. Right?

00:30:27.480 --> 00:30:29.660
So it's this you that you're bringing to your

00:30:29.660 --> 00:30:32.160
business, it's going to dictate whether your

00:30:32.160 --> 00:30:35.299
business succeeds or whether it fails. A lot

00:30:35.299 --> 00:30:38.160
of times we end up going to get paying for different

00:30:38.160 --> 00:30:40.839
programs. Oh, this marketing program is going

00:30:40.839 --> 00:30:42.599
to make me successful. This is going to make

00:30:42.599 --> 00:30:44.920
me... Oh, just shiny new things we're paying

00:30:44.920 --> 00:30:48.079
for outside of ourselves thinking that's the

00:30:48.079 --> 00:30:51.000
answer. When the answer is, we need to pause

00:30:51.000 --> 00:30:54.480
and deal with what's within here that we're avoiding.

00:30:54.779 --> 00:30:59.160
that we're avoiding. I think sometimes entrepreneurship

00:30:59.160 --> 00:31:04.079
can be used as an escape goat. And I think one

00:31:04.079 --> 00:31:07.079
of the most powerful things that I just heard

00:31:07.079 --> 00:31:10.380
come through for me was that you have to deal

00:31:10.380 --> 00:31:12.859
with what's going on with you. Because like you

00:31:12.859 --> 00:31:14.119
said, there's going to be some things that show

00:31:14.119 --> 00:31:16.839
up that you're going to have to confront. And

00:31:16.839 --> 00:31:21.420
your business is ultimately a reflection of what's

00:31:21.420 --> 00:31:24.460
happening to you inside anyway. You have this

00:31:24.460 --> 00:31:26.500
part of you that's, you know, that want to strive

00:31:26.500 --> 00:31:28.079
for success, but then you might have this other

00:31:28.079 --> 00:31:29.299
stuff that you're not dealing with that's going

00:31:29.299 --> 00:31:31.519
to bring you down. So your business is not going

00:31:31.519 --> 00:31:33.660
to go as far as you want to go because of some

00:31:33.660 --> 00:31:36.119
things that you haven't dealt with yet. Right.

00:31:37.220 --> 00:31:40.079
And what do you say to those people that are

00:31:40.079 --> 00:31:41.960
probably in that space right now? What do they

00:31:41.960 --> 00:31:47.200
do to really, really confront what's showing

00:31:47.200 --> 00:31:51.430
up for them? so that they can get past that level

00:31:51.430 --> 00:31:54.049
that they're trying to get past in order to have

00:31:54.049 --> 00:31:56.289
their business grow. Well, I would say the key

00:31:56.289 --> 00:31:59.430
is taking the time because a lot of times people

00:31:59.430 --> 00:32:02.990
run away from silence. So taking the time to

00:32:02.990 --> 00:32:06.289
sit in the silence, taking the time to do simple

00:32:06.289 --> 00:32:08.609
things like journal, what you're feeling, what

00:32:08.609 --> 00:32:10.589
you're thinking, you would be surprised at what

00:32:10.589 --> 00:32:13.230
comes up because it's in there wanting to come

00:32:13.230 --> 00:32:15.930
out. But when you talk about entrepreneurship

00:32:15.930 --> 00:32:22.200
being a scapegoat. It's easy for us to stay busy

00:32:22.200 --> 00:32:24.579
so that we don't have to deal with these things.

00:32:24.660 --> 00:32:26.940
And we're thinking that if I keep just working

00:32:26.940 --> 00:32:30.920
harder, success is going to come. And that's

00:32:30.920 --> 00:32:32.980
not the answer. That's not the solution, right?

00:32:33.279 --> 00:32:36.440
You will be burnt down, burnt down, right? Exactly.

00:32:37.019 --> 00:32:38.720
Just working, working, working. But I'm working

00:32:38.720 --> 00:32:40.779
hard. And people are probably congratulating

00:32:40.779 --> 00:32:43.720
you for working so hard. You're really committed.

00:32:43.839 --> 00:32:46.579
You're working hard. But you know. it's not that

00:32:46.579 --> 00:32:49.119
hard work that you need to tend to. You know

00:32:49.119 --> 00:32:52.299
it's something else. So you have to pause and

00:32:52.299 --> 00:32:54.400
be honest with yourself and deal with that something

00:32:54.400 --> 00:32:58.440
else. I would say one of the sacred smile steps

00:32:58.440 --> 00:33:01.539
you can take is just writing journaling, journaling

00:33:01.539 --> 00:33:04.500
about what you feel. From there, I think the

00:33:04.500 --> 00:33:07.539
awkward process though is to work with a therapist,

00:33:07.720 --> 00:33:10.680
work with someone you can talk it out with. because

00:33:10.680 --> 00:33:13.839
there is so much healing and being able to express

00:33:13.839 --> 00:33:17.519
what you feel. And once you allow yourself, give

00:33:17.519 --> 00:33:21.019
yourself permission to listen to what's coming

00:33:21.019 --> 00:33:24.339
out, it's going to definitely come out. You will

00:33:24.339 --> 00:33:26.680
discover what it is that you need to work through.

00:33:26.980 --> 00:33:30.160
One of the big things I've found is entrepreneurs

00:33:30.160 --> 00:33:34.420
can have what I call money trauma and not be

00:33:34.420 --> 00:33:38.220
aware of it. On one side, you're saying, I want

00:33:38.220 --> 00:33:40.240
to be successful. I want to make this much money.

00:33:40.299 --> 00:33:42.299
On the other side, you're afraid to make that

00:33:42.299 --> 00:33:45.220
amount of money, right? Like your business plan

00:33:45.220 --> 00:33:48.359
says, I want to make this by month six or this

00:33:48.359 --> 00:33:52.980
by year three or year five. But internally, you're

00:33:52.980 --> 00:33:55.960
struggling with the concept of, well, if I make

00:33:55.960 --> 00:33:57.640
that much money, what's going to happen? No,

00:33:57.839 --> 00:34:01.000
is it believable? If it's believable, then what

00:34:01.000 --> 00:34:04.490
will I do when I get there? you have an envision

00:34:04.490 --> 00:34:09.889
yourself beyond that spot. So it's kind of, it's

00:34:09.889 --> 00:34:13.809
difficult for you to really mentally and emotionally

00:34:13.809 --> 00:34:17.010
get there to that accomplishment. And you don't

00:34:17.010 --> 00:34:21.309
realize you are self sabotaging yourself because

00:34:21.309 --> 00:34:24.349
you're saying one thing, but you're really feeling

00:34:24.349 --> 00:34:27.559
something else. So maybe when you grew up, you

00:34:27.559 --> 00:34:30.840
were told things like money don't grow on trees,

00:34:30.960 --> 00:34:33.260
or you were made to feel like you didn't deserve

00:34:33.260 --> 00:34:37.099
to have something special that was a little expensive,

00:34:37.119 --> 00:34:40.900
right? So you're penny pinching everything, right?

00:34:41.619 --> 00:34:45.340
So you really don't honor abundance, right? If

00:34:45.340 --> 00:34:49.380
you grew up and you internalized the energies

00:34:49.380 --> 00:34:53.349
of scarcity, you don't honor abundance. Maybe

00:34:53.349 --> 00:34:55.650
you grew up with an environment where people

00:34:55.650 --> 00:34:59.429
who were wealthy were bad. You were always taught

00:34:59.429 --> 00:35:02.210
that they must have gotten their money by doing

00:35:02.210 --> 00:35:04.530
something that, you know, that was horrible or

00:35:04.530 --> 00:35:06.469
they were not good people because they have a

00:35:06.469 --> 00:35:09.409
lot of money. So internally, somewhere you feel

00:35:09.409 --> 00:35:11.590
that way. If I get too rich, then I'm not going

00:35:11.590 --> 00:35:14.070
to be a good person. And it's not as literal

00:35:14.070 --> 00:35:18.409
as that in your mind, but that feeling is in

00:35:18.409 --> 00:35:22.489
that belief. is controlling your steps, controlling

00:35:22.489 --> 00:35:25.389
how you express yourself in business. Well, that

00:35:25.389 --> 00:35:28.730
definitely speaks to your subconscious, and that

00:35:28.730 --> 00:35:31.989
subconscious is what, you know, really runs the

00:35:31.989 --> 00:35:34.690
show. Right. You know, your mouth may say one

00:35:34.690 --> 00:35:36.889
thing, I want to be, you know, super successful

00:35:36.889 --> 00:35:40.030
in my business, but what you believe in your

00:35:40.030 --> 00:35:43.030
subconscious and your being, it may be totally

00:35:43.030 --> 00:35:45.289
opposite of that, and that's probably where people

00:35:45.289 --> 00:35:49.329
find themselves stuck. I know for me, I was like...

00:35:49.340 --> 00:35:54.599
there were environmental, I saw people getting

00:35:54.599 --> 00:35:57.699
lots of money, but not in great way, right? And

00:35:57.699 --> 00:36:01.320
so I think that played, well, I saw it two different

00:36:01.320 --> 00:36:03.579
ways. I saw on one side of my family is like,

00:36:03.579 --> 00:36:07.360
you know, very successful working and you know,

00:36:07.360 --> 00:36:09.000
gaining abundance. But then I saw it on the other

00:36:09.000 --> 00:36:11.300
side where they're gaining bonus, but it was

00:36:11.300 --> 00:36:14.320
not the, you know, not the legal way. And so

00:36:14.320 --> 00:36:20.650
I had that little split thought that really played

00:36:20.650 --> 00:36:23.250
against me and my subconscious. And so as I'm

00:36:23.250 --> 00:36:25.969
growing, I have those things that I had to actually

00:36:25.969 --> 00:36:29.230
heal in order to continue to grow in my life.

00:36:29.489 --> 00:36:31.869
And so I'm still going through that and the healing.

00:36:32.530 --> 00:36:34.909
But people may be, you know, environmentally,

00:36:35.090 --> 00:36:38.210
they may have that going on with them subconsciously

00:36:38.210 --> 00:36:41.210
as they were growing up. And they may need to

00:36:41.210 --> 00:36:43.489
heal that. And you talk about, I mean, you talk

00:36:43.489 --> 00:36:46.250
about healing and things like that and self -love,

00:36:46.610 --> 00:36:49.150
radical self -love and embracing that. It's,

00:36:49.150 --> 00:36:51.989
for some people, may not be as easy as just saying,

00:36:52.010 --> 00:36:54.690
embrace yourself with radical self -love. What

00:36:54.690 --> 00:36:57.090
does that mean to you, radical self -love, and

00:36:57.090 --> 00:37:00.909
how does one, especially black female entrepreneurs,

00:37:01.389 --> 00:37:04.489
begin to really take the practice of embracing

00:37:04.489 --> 00:37:06.889
themselves if they have that kind of trauma going

00:37:06.889 --> 00:37:10.130
on with them? Okay, well, in embracing radical

00:37:10.130 --> 00:37:12.309
self -love, it means, I think, one of the top

00:37:12.309 --> 00:37:16.309
things we have to do is realize that we deserve

00:37:16.679 --> 00:37:19.900
we need to give ourselves permission to fill

00:37:19.900 --> 00:37:22.719
our cup first, right? So that's a great place

00:37:22.719 --> 00:37:26.539
to start. So for someone just beginning the journey

00:37:26.539 --> 00:37:28.699
of radical self -love, just realizing, okay,

00:37:28.780 --> 00:37:31.679
maybe that's something I need to, you know, sink

00:37:31.679 --> 00:37:34.980
my teeth into and try to figure out if that's

00:37:34.980 --> 00:37:38.039
effecting what I'm doing in my business. I would

00:37:38.039 --> 00:37:42.199
say to take note of what you're doing for a week.

00:37:42.820 --> 00:37:46.599
Take a note of how you just how you move in your

00:37:46.599 --> 00:37:50.619
life for a week, which means journaling at the

00:37:50.619 --> 00:37:54.940
end of the day, every night over what you have

00:37:54.940 --> 00:37:58.420
experienced that day, really just what you did

00:37:58.420 --> 00:38:01.500
for a week. And then after that week, going back

00:38:01.500 --> 00:38:04.400
to read what you did. And when you read what

00:38:04.400 --> 00:38:07.639
you did, whatever you did, what I want you to

00:38:07.639 --> 00:38:12.500
think about is how much of this was filling your

00:38:12.500 --> 00:38:16.280
cup. and how much of this was pouring into others'

00:38:16.659 --> 00:38:19.539
cups, right? So you have two categories. Of what

00:38:19.539 --> 00:38:23.840
I did for this past week, what actions were me

00:38:23.840 --> 00:38:26.519
filling my cup and what actions were me pointing

00:38:26.519 --> 00:38:29.219
to other people or giving to other people? And

00:38:29.219 --> 00:38:32.320
just to define what filling your cup is and pouring

00:38:32.320 --> 00:38:34.300
into other people's cup, what is that? Right,

00:38:34.380 --> 00:38:38.500
so filling your cup is when you're doing things

00:38:38.500 --> 00:38:43.519
that edify you and your soul. Resting. eating

00:38:43.519 --> 00:38:48.019
right, taking a moment of silence, doing something

00:38:48.019 --> 00:38:52.420
that's equivalent to self -care for you, right?

00:38:52.619 --> 00:38:55.800
Pointing to others or things, tasks and things

00:38:55.800 --> 00:38:58.300
you do to serve other people, no matter what

00:38:58.300 --> 00:39:00.519
it is, making something for someone, cooking

00:39:00.519 --> 00:39:03.019
something else for someone, following up on something

00:39:03.019 --> 00:39:06.300
for someone else, taking someone around somewhere

00:39:06.300 --> 00:39:09.059
to somewhere, things you do for other people.

00:39:09.400 --> 00:39:14.730
Yeah. Right. And... So after you've journaled

00:39:14.730 --> 00:39:17.610
about this for a week and you're reflecting going

00:39:17.610 --> 00:39:20.449
through this and you're checking out what did

00:39:20.449 --> 00:39:22.409
I do for myself and what did I do for others,

00:39:22.530 --> 00:39:25.389
you're going to compare these two and see, okay,

00:39:25.510 --> 00:39:28.670
so how much am I doing for me and how much am

00:39:28.670 --> 00:39:31.150
I doing for others? Now, if you look at that

00:39:31.150 --> 00:39:33.949
amount, you're going to, for what you do for

00:39:33.949 --> 00:39:37.130
others, ask yourself, why? Why am I doing this

00:39:37.130 --> 00:39:40.980
for others? Like, is it... genuine love or care

00:39:40.980 --> 00:39:44.500
that I'm doing this? Is it because I feel responsible?

00:39:45.119 --> 00:39:48.440
Is it because I like the accolades I get from

00:39:48.440 --> 00:39:51.000
other people for doing this? Is it because other

00:39:51.000 --> 00:39:53.820
people say this is what I should be doing, right?

00:39:54.260 --> 00:39:57.400
It makes a difference. Exactly. It makes a difference.

00:39:57.699 --> 00:40:01.920
And a lot of times we're so busy in that spiral

00:40:01.920 --> 00:40:05.539
of doing it, we don't stop to critically think

00:40:05.539 --> 00:40:07.780
about why we're doing it. Because you're in it

00:40:07.780 --> 00:40:10.980
spirally. Exactly. You're so busy in it that

00:40:10.980 --> 00:40:14.820
you don't stop to think, and why am I doing this

00:40:14.820 --> 00:40:17.739
again? Now, why am I the person that always does

00:40:17.739 --> 00:40:19.900
this? You know, is it something you just took

00:40:19.900 --> 00:40:22.739
on and just, okay, they expect me to do it, so

00:40:22.739 --> 00:40:25.780
I will. But how's that working out for you, right?

00:40:25.780 --> 00:40:29.619
That's the next step. Yeah. Journal what you've

00:40:29.619 --> 00:40:32.679
done. Look at is it pointed to you or pointed

00:40:32.679 --> 00:40:36.840
to others? Why are you doing it? And how they

00:40:36.840 --> 00:40:39.539
serve you. Yeah. And that brings that brings

00:40:39.539 --> 00:40:42.300
clarity also, you know, just from the actions

00:40:42.300 --> 00:40:45.420
and what kind of things. I mean, that's the part,

00:40:45.440 --> 00:40:47.139
I guess it's reflecting. You need to reflect

00:40:47.139 --> 00:40:50.159
on yourself through those different steps. What

00:40:50.159 --> 00:40:52.539
are, what is it? 90 days? Let me look in my notes

00:40:52.539 --> 00:40:54.440
here. You have a, you said 90 day journey, right?

00:40:54.619 --> 00:40:59.559
90 day journal. Yeah. What mindset set do entrepreneurs

00:40:59.559 --> 00:41:03.039
need to really true benefit from your 90 day

00:41:03.039 --> 00:41:05.869
journal? Because I know that you have that. And

00:41:05.869 --> 00:41:10.969
I think it's, for me, journaling is really powerful

00:41:10.969 --> 00:41:14.650
because I get to look back and see from moments

00:41:14.650 --> 00:41:17.690
ago that I probably remember in real life, but

00:41:17.690 --> 00:41:21.210
if I get to the journal, I'm like, oh yeah, I

00:41:21.210 --> 00:41:25.449
was thinking that. That was who I was. How does

00:41:25.449 --> 00:41:28.949
that work for entrepreneurs in your 90 -day journal?

00:41:29.150 --> 00:41:32.690
Sure. So the 90 -Day Your 90 -Day Success Journal

00:41:32.690 --> 00:41:36.369
that I created, it's inclusive of planning. So

00:41:36.369 --> 00:41:39.309
it's planning a quarter in your business, planning

00:41:39.309 --> 00:41:42.369
quarterly, and then breaking that plan down to

00:41:42.369 --> 00:41:46.030
monthly, then weekly, and then daily execution.

00:41:46.710 --> 00:41:48.630
So what it looks like is you're going to plan,

00:41:48.750 --> 00:41:51.789
let's say you plan a month in your business,

00:41:52.190 --> 00:41:53.750
things you want to accomplish. You're going to

00:41:53.750 --> 00:41:56.070
break that down to what I'm going to accomplish

00:41:56.070 --> 00:42:00.329
each week. And then daily, you're going to have

00:42:00.329 --> 00:42:02.829
in the journal affirmations. And my suggestion

00:42:02.829 --> 00:42:07.150
is that you do these affirmations in the mirror.

00:42:07.409 --> 00:42:09.409
So you do these affirmations looking at yourself

00:42:09.409 --> 00:42:12.030
in the mirror, speaking to yourself. And the

00:42:12.030 --> 00:42:15.369
most important thing is to feel the affirmation.

00:42:15.389 --> 00:42:17.349
So it's not just reciting the words and going,

00:42:17.570 --> 00:42:20.929
OK, I said them. It's pausing to feel it. You

00:42:20.929 --> 00:42:23.809
know, one of the affirmations is, I am worthy,

00:42:24.269 --> 00:42:26.030
right? It's not for you to just say, I'm worthy.

00:42:26.250 --> 00:42:31.090
I am worthy is for you to feel it. I am powerful,

00:42:31.630 --> 00:42:33.989
right? So you acknowledge it. You are powerful.

00:42:34.429 --> 00:42:36.389
So the other part of that is, so what am I gonna

00:42:36.389 --> 00:42:41.070
do with my power today? Right? So you begin your

00:42:41.070 --> 00:42:45.190
day on a note and with the energy that you are

00:42:45.190 --> 00:42:48.030
poised for success. You're empowering yourself.

00:42:48.210 --> 00:42:50.269
You're bringing up those energies in yourself

00:42:50.269 --> 00:42:54.489
before you start anything else. So the affirmations

00:42:54.489 --> 00:42:57.510
and then you journal what you're going to do

00:42:57.510 --> 00:42:59.530
for that day What is the main thing I want to

00:42:59.530 --> 00:43:02.170
accomplish today? So that's just your your thought

00:43:02.170 --> 00:43:04.630
process in your business. What is the main task?

00:43:04.989 --> 00:43:07.449
What is the main success? What's the main thing

00:43:07.449 --> 00:43:09.329
I want to accomplish today? I'm going to work

00:43:09.329 --> 00:43:13.230
on yeah, and Then you at the end of your day

00:43:13.230 --> 00:43:15.769
you come back and you reflect on how your day

00:43:15.769 --> 00:43:19.789
went What did I accomplish? What did I learn?

00:43:20.010 --> 00:43:23.579
What made me smile today? Because it's not always

00:43:23.579 --> 00:43:28.139
just about the work. It's about what did I experience

00:43:28.139 --> 00:43:31.460
today? I also have in there quotes from other

00:43:31.460 --> 00:43:35.840
black women, very encouraging quotes. I have

00:43:35.840 --> 00:43:38.539
some modalities you can do as far as meditation

00:43:38.539 --> 00:43:41.860
and breath work to help you calm your system

00:43:41.860 --> 00:43:44.699
down and get it prepared. So those are different

00:43:44.699 --> 00:43:47.880
elements of the 90 Day Success Journal that helps

00:43:47.880 --> 00:43:51.550
entrepreneurs. honor how they step into their

00:43:51.550 --> 00:43:55.269
business in the morning and honor how they go

00:43:55.269 --> 00:43:58.909
to rest at night. And once, and a point you made,

00:43:59.050 --> 00:44:02.309
once they journaled for that month, there's a

00:44:02.309 --> 00:44:04.750
day of reflection for every week. So a day of

00:44:04.750 --> 00:44:06.889
reflection to look back on that week and all

00:44:06.889 --> 00:44:08.769
your journaling and what did you accomplish?

00:44:09.110 --> 00:44:12.010
How did that week go? How did you grow? It's

00:44:12.010 --> 00:44:14.110
a really big thing. How did I grow this week?

00:44:14.630 --> 00:44:16.750
Right? Because we have challenges, and a lot

00:44:16.750 --> 00:44:18.909
of times we feel those challenges are just, right,

00:44:19.389 --> 00:44:22.409
just hard stuff. But how did you grow from that

00:44:22.409 --> 00:44:25.590
challenge? Because you do know that in building

00:44:25.590 --> 00:44:27.869
a business, you're going to grow, right? You

00:44:27.869 --> 00:44:31.250
want to grow. So how did you grow from that pain

00:44:31.250 --> 00:44:34.789
or that challenge or that thing that you felt

00:44:34.789 --> 00:44:38.090
was a negative or that it really halted you from

00:44:38.090 --> 00:44:40.320
doing something? How did you grow? How'd you

00:44:40.320 --> 00:44:43.420
have to pivot and you did something you now have

00:44:43.420 --> 00:44:45.900
a skill or knowledge you didn't have before?

00:44:46.519 --> 00:44:50.500
I think that's key. Learning how you grew and

00:44:50.500 --> 00:44:53.340
if you grew. Yes. Because you don't want to stay

00:44:53.340 --> 00:44:55.400
stagnant. So especially if you're in business

00:44:55.400 --> 00:44:58.360
and your business is not going anywhere, it may

00:44:58.360 --> 00:45:01.659
be something that I would assert to say it has

00:45:01.659 --> 00:45:04.739
something to do with who you're being. Yes. And

00:45:04.739 --> 00:45:08.659
if you're not growing through, you know, trials

00:45:08.659 --> 00:45:11.519
and the tribulations and the, you know, the mistakes

00:45:11.519 --> 00:45:13.260
and all that kind of stuff, then your business

00:45:13.260 --> 00:45:16.480
isn't growing. Would you agree with that or no?

00:45:16.920 --> 00:45:21.400
Definitely. Definitely. Definitely. Yeah. And

00:45:21.400 --> 00:45:23.940
that leads me to this question is that consistency

00:45:23.940 --> 00:45:27.659
beats authenticity. And what, in the journaling,

00:45:27.739 --> 00:45:29.840
I know we talked about journaling, what are some

00:45:29.840 --> 00:45:32.679
of the other daily habits that entrepreneurs,

00:45:32.940 --> 00:45:35.369
like female entrepreneurs especially, can take

00:45:35.369 --> 00:45:38.409
daily that will impact their business and successful

00:45:38.409 --> 00:45:40.849
growth. And I would say, I'm definitely making

00:45:40.849 --> 00:45:43.809
sure that you give yourself permission to rest.

00:45:43.849 --> 00:45:46.849
Yeah. Right? That's a big thing. Give yourself

00:45:46.849 --> 00:45:50.289
permission to rest. When you find yourself in

00:45:50.289 --> 00:45:52.550
your mind, you're running around in circles to

00:45:52.550 --> 00:45:56.789
find a solution for something, instead of selling

00:45:56.789 --> 00:45:59.769
for that solution that really doesn't feel right,

00:46:00.070 --> 00:46:02.070
give yourself permission to rest and come back

00:46:02.070 --> 00:46:04.860
to it later. Right? So give me yourself permission

00:46:04.860 --> 00:46:07.900
to rest. A lot of times we as entrepreneurs feel

00:46:07.900 --> 00:46:13.079
like we have to be working all the time in order

00:46:13.079 --> 00:46:17.099
to prove to others that we are sincere about

00:46:17.099 --> 00:46:22.840
our business, but that's not sustainable. Exactly.

00:46:23.380 --> 00:46:25.840
So give yourself permission to rest. Rest does

00:46:25.840 --> 00:46:29.139
a couple of things. It helps your mind refresh,

00:46:29.519 --> 00:46:31.579
helps your nervous system calm down. It also

00:46:31.579 --> 00:46:35.199
helps your creativity. It stirs up your creativity.

00:46:35.300 --> 00:46:38.039
So when you come back with a rest in mind, you'll

00:46:38.039 --> 00:46:39.920
find solutions coming to you. Like people say

00:46:39.920 --> 00:46:42.800
they often get their greatest ideas in the shower,

00:46:43.500 --> 00:46:45.860
right? That's because they're in there and they

00:46:45.860 --> 00:46:49.019
can't be busy doing other stuff. So when their

00:46:49.019 --> 00:46:52.130
mind can't... Exactly. And when your mind has

00:46:52.130 --> 00:46:54.510
that space for, oh, we're relaxed right now.

00:46:54.710 --> 00:46:58.269
Let me give you this idea. Now, the creativity

00:46:58.269 --> 00:47:03.809
is always there. The point is, is it coming through

00:47:03.809 --> 00:47:06.030
to you or not? Are you allowing it to come through?

00:47:06.269 --> 00:47:08.369
So when you're in the shower tending to yourself

00:47:08.369 --> 00:47:10.809
and you can't be busy doing 100 different things,

00:47:11.650 --> 00:47:14.710
it finds space to come through. Yeah. Where if

00:47:14.710 --> 00:47:17.989
you sit still and rest, it will find space to

00:47:17.989 --> 00:47:20.159
come through. Yeah, I totally agree with that.

00:47:21.019 --> 00:47:23.340
There's moments, and I talked to my producer

00:47:23.340 --> 00:47:28.679
about this, where sometimes I'm stuck on something,

00:47:28.739 --> 00:47:30.980
and I'm sure that people couldn't relate to this.

00:47:31.300 --> 00:47:33.099
You're stuck on something, and what I'll do is

00:47:33.099 --> 00:47:35.440
I'll be like, you know what, just release, just

00:47:35.440 --> 00:47:40.139
surrender, just be cool, walk away, allow myself

00:47:40.139 --> 00:47:43.460
to just be in the present and just rest. And

00:47:43.460 --> 00:47:45.420
all of a sudden, I'm like, oh, okay, I can do

00:47:45.420 --> 00:47:47.019
this, or I can do that, or I can do this, I can

00:47:47.019 --> 00:47:51.480
do that. then all of a sudden I'm just down this

00:47:51.480 --> 00:47:56.179
path with actions to get to whatever goal that

00:47:56.179 --> 00:47:59.360
I've been trying to meet or whatever, you know,

00:47:59.440 --> 00:48:01.780
tasks I'm trying to complete. And it would be

00:48:01.780 --> 00:48:05.159
like out of the blue and it wouldn't be something

00:48:05.159 --> 00:48:11.809
that I thought of before. It's powerful. Yes,

00:48:12.010 --> 00:48:14.949
your nervous system is serious business, right?

00:48:15.329 --> 00:48:19.130
So when you are stressed and you are overworked,

00:48:19.269 --> 00:48:22.809
right? Your body is in this fight mode, right?

00:48:22.889 --> 00:48:25.570
It's in this struggle mode. And those things

00:48:25.570 --> 00:48:28.469
you're talking about, how the solutions came

00:48:28.469 --> 00:48:32.090
to you, the creativity coming through, it's not

00:48:32.090 --> 00:48:34.449
gonna get through in those moments because your

00:48:34.449 --> 00:48:37.809
body is busy keeping you alive. Right? You are

00:48:37.809 --> 00:48:40.010
restricting your blood vessels. You know, you

00:48:40.010 --> 00:48:42.809
got all kinds of physical things going on. That's

00:48:42.809 --> 00:48:45.789
not the time your body is going to release creative

00:48:45.789 --> 00:48:48.269
ideas. It's like, we got to breathe right. You're

00:48:48.269 --> 00:48:50.909
breathing shallow, right? The lungs are working.

00:48:51.050 --> 00:48:54.329
It's like, we got too much going on. To stay

00:48:54.329 --> 00:48:56.949
alive right now, to give you some creative ideas,

00:48:57.010 --> 00:49:00.239
that's not important. What's important is keeping

00:49:00.239 --> 00:49:02.679
our system calm and working the blood pumping,

00:49:02.960 --> 00:49:05.920
right? So then when you relax, when you take

00:49:05.920 --> 00:49:09.420
a break, when you say, okay, you know, I give

00:49:09.420 --> 00:49:12.460
up, let me just go rest. Let me just go get a

00:49:12.460 --> 00:49:14.639
drink of water. Let me just go read a book. Let

00:49:14.639 --> 00:49:18.679
me just go do something. Your body, all those

00:49:18.679 --> 00:49:23.199
systems now are relaxed, right? So now your brain...

00:49:23.230 --> 00:49:25.570
can give you those creative ideas because it's

00:49:25.570 --> 00:49:28.070
not tending to all that other stuff you had going

00:49:28.070 --> 00:49:31.409
on when you were stressed and burnt out, right?

00:49:31.889 --> 00:49:34.170
Same concept we have to realize when we're pouring

00:49:34.170 --> 00:49:37.170
into other people and not pouring into ourselves.

00:49:37.690 --> 00:49:40.710
Our systems are working so hard to get all those

00:49:40.710 --> 00:49:43.750
things done and to keep you alive, inter -heal

00:49:43.750 --> 00:49:47.230
stuff you got going on, that the creativity is

00:49:47.230 --> 00:49:50.230
not coming through at those moments. Yeah. So

00:49:50.230 --> 00:49:53.050
if you're feeling stuck, The best way to get

00:49:53.050 --> 00:49:57.070
unstuck is to give your body relief. Okay, you

00:49:57.070 --> 00:49:59.070
don't have to tend to me. You don't have to worry

00:49:59.070 --> 00:50:01.329
about me breathing really fast or shallow. I'm

00:50:01.329 --> 00:50:04.090
taking slow deep breaths. You don't have to worry

00:50:04.090 --> 00:50:06.949
about me and being afraid in fight or flight.

00:50:07.130 --> 00:50:12.409
I am calm, right? I have released. I am ready

00:50:12.409 --> 00:50:14.610
for the answer. Yeah, you know what? And I could

00:50:14.610 --> 00:50:17.309
say, I think that again, people can relate to

00:50:17.309 --> 00:50:19.730
this is that. When you're working really hard,

00:50:19.730 --> 00:50:21.429
or I'm just gonna use myself, when I'm working

00:50:21.429 --> 00:50:24.789
really hard, and I'm trying to just, in a race,

00:50:24.869 --> 00:50:26.769
right, like I'm trying to get to a certain space,

00:50:27.349 --> 00:50:30.389
or a certain level or whatever, and I'm just

00:50:30.389 --> 00:50:32.210
working hard, working hard, and I look up and

00:50:32.210 --> 00:50:35.050
it's like nothing's happening. But then, if I'm

00:50:35.050 --> 00:50:39.610
in my good space, my higher self, what I'll do

00:50:39.610 --> 00:50:42.590
is just be with what's happening, be present,

00:50:43.070 --> 00:50:44.929
take care of what there's to take care of, and

00:50:44.929 --> 00:50:46.809
all of a sudden, I'm like, wait a minute, I accomplished

00:50:46.809 --> 00:50:50.849
all this today? without all the stress, the hustle

00:50:50.849 --> 00:50:54.070
and the grind and all that stuff that really,

00:50:54.070 --> 00:50:57.630
like you said, is not sustainable. Right. Yeah.

00:50:58.269 --> 00:51:03.590
That's a lesson for other people too. It's kind

00:51:03.590 --> 00:51:07.329
of just relaxing in the doing and just being

00:51:07.329 --> 00:51:10.530
someone that's about, you know, really about

00:51:10.530 --> 00:51:13.250
accomplishing but peacefully and with surrender.

00:51:13.829 --> 00:51:18.079
Yes. You have this amazing thing called compassionate

00:51:18.079 --> 00:51:20.579
accounting. First of all, I would not ever have

00:51:20.579 --> 00:51:23.400
put those two words together. All right? And

00:51:23.400 --> 00:51:25.300
I want to talk about that for a second, but you

00:51:25.300 --> 00:51:29.059
say this, and it's the what of it. Running a

00:51:29.059 --> 00:51:31.659
business as a black woman can be emotional, rewarding,

00:51:31.800 --> 00:51:35.400
and sometimes overwhelmingly journey, and sometimes

00:51:35.400 --> 00:51:37.800
overwhelmingly journey, especially when it comes

00:51:37.800 --> 00:51:39.980
to handling money. It's not just about numbers.

00:51:40.000 --> 00:51:43.110
It's about the story we've inherited. the belief

00:51:43.110 --> 00:51:45.309
we've carried and the legacy we're creating.

00:51:45.909 --> 00:51:48.989
One of my missions as being a space of transformation

00:51:48.989 --> 00:51:53.230
for people is that in the black community, we

00:51:53.230 --> 00:51:56.449
don't have a lot of knowledge when it comes to

00:51:56.449 --> 00:51:59.170
numbers and finances and legacy and things like

00:51:59.170 --> 00:52:02.869
that. Does your business, compassion accounting,

00:52:02.969 --> 00:52:05.989
does that teach that? What do you say about people

00:52:05.989 --> 00:52:09.710
connecting with that idea and learning more about

00:52:09.710 --> 00:52:13.230
finances and legacy? getting into that world

00:52:13.230 --> 00:52:15.769
so that we can leave legacy for our generations.

00:52:16.250 --> 00:52:20.369
Yes, I feel like it is by design that the simple

00:52:20.369 --> 00:52:24.550
concepts of how to build legacy to how to grow

00:52:24.550 --> 00:52:29.090
money is not a part of everyday education in

00:52:29.090 --> 00:52:31.829
the school system. I think it's by design that

00:52:31.829 --> 00:52:35.809
we graduate from high school, we graduate from

00:52:35.809 --> 00:52:38.210
college, and we really don't understand how money

00:52:38.210 --> 00:52:42.269
works. We know nothing about how investing works.

00:52:42.809 --> 00:52:46.110
We know nothing about the stock markets. It's

00:52:46.110 --> 00:52:50.889
all portrayed as something way out there that

00:52:50.889 --> 00:52:53.190
you shouldn't even try to worry about. You'll

00:52:53.190 --> 00:52:56.190
never understand. It's mystical, right? You got

00:52:56.190 --> 00:52:59.269
to have a lot of money to even take advantage

00:52:59.269 --> 00:53:01.510
of it. So don't worry a little mind about that,

00:53:01.630 --> 00:53:05.760
right? by design. So what I do with the compassionate

00:53:05.760 --> 00:53:09.239
accounting is a lot of times we as black women

00:53:09.239 --> 00:53:13.039
entrepreneurs, and so for women, first of all,

00:53:13.139 --> 00:53:17.519
just for women, we have a lower confidence of

00:53:17.519 --> 00:53:20.340
talking about money and dealing with money than

00:53:20.340 --> 00:53:24.000
men do. As black women, we have additional layers

00:53:24.000 --> 00:53:26.760
on top of that low confidence, right? We have

00:53:26.760 --> 00:53:29.449
money trauma. So when you talk about building

00:53:29.449 --> 00:53:32.190
a business and the resources that are available,

00:53:32.389 --> 00:53:34.389
there's a lot of resources we're not aware of

00:53:34.389 --> 00:53:37.550
and that we feel emotionally about, like business

00:53:37.550 --> 00:53:41.050
loans. You know, how we felt like owing someone

00:53:41.050 --> 00:53:45.550
money is a negative concept and carrying that

00:53:45.550 --> 00:53:51.170
over to your business lane. can be a challenge.

00:53:51.409 --> 00:53:54.630
Being given different avenues to how to build

00:53:54.630 --> 00:53:57.210
wealth and how people can invest in you and how

00:53:57.210 --> 00:54:00.869
you can be successful in money and seeing that

00:54:00.869 --> 00:54:04.320
through the lens of... having money trauma can

00:54:04.320 --> 00:54:07.619
be debilitating to your business. So with Compassionate

00:54:07.619 --> 00:54:10.320
County, what I do is I want to break down those

00:54:10.320 --> 00:54:12.820
mindset burials we have when it comes to money,

00:54:12.900 --> 00:54:15.559
like the way we don't want to deal with looking

00:54:15.559 --> 00:54:18.579
at what our true business expenses are. We have

00:54:18.579 --> 00:54:21.519
it all mixed up with our personal expenses and

00:54:21.519 --> 00:54:23.659
our personal account. We have receipts hidden

00:54:23.659 --> 00:54:26.280
in every different drawer. When it comes to tax

00:54:26.280 --> 00:54:28.840
time, we just want to get it over with. and we

00:54:28.840 --> 00:54:30.619
just give you all these receipts and you just

00:54:30.619 --> 00:54:33.019
deal with that. Well, you're building a business,

00:54:33.019 --> 00:54:37.460
so you have to get friendly with money. You have

00:54:37.460 --> 00:54:40.480
to understand how to handle money, manage money,

00:54:40.940 --> 00:54:44.820
and grow money. Oftentimes, my profession, the

00:54:44.820 --> 00:54:47.800
accounting profession, has made people feel like

00:54:47.800 --> 00:54:49.480
they were stupid when they didn't know stuff

00:54:49.480 --> 00:54:52.139
about money. Like, why did you do that that way?

00:54:52.199 --> 00:54:56.019
You know, you can't do it like that, right? We

00:54:56.019 --> 00:54:59.539
expect you to know what we went to college to

00:54:59.539 --> 00:55:02.619
learn and we've been doing for years. And now

00:55:02.619 --> 00:55:05.780
we want to make you feel like, okay, you're less

00:55:05.780 --> 00:55:07.960
than because you don't know all this stuff that

00:55:07.960 --> 00:55:11.039
we know, right? Which I think is unfair. So compassionate

00:55:11.039 --> 00:55:13.619
accounting brings it down to your level. What

00:55:13.619 --> 00:55:16.519
I do is what I love to do is break the complicated

00:55:16.519 --> 00:55:19.360
down to the simple every day. So they help you

00:55:19.360 --> 00:55:23.230
understand on your terms, wherever you are. what

00:55:23.230 --> 00:55:25.610
this means and how it affects your business.

00:55:26.309 --> 00:55:29.150
There are a lot of expenses that we as business

00:55:29.150 --> 00:55:32.849
owners are not taking advantage of to decrease

00:55:32.849 --> 00:55:35.630
our taxes because we're hiding those expenses

00:55:35.630 --> 00:55:38.530
all over the place. We have no idea how much

00:55:38.530 --> 00:55:43.070
money we're losing paying taxes, right? Because

00:55:43.070 --> 00:55:45.190
we're not keeping up with all those expenses.

00:55:45.230 --> 00:55:49.650
So I want us to be more organized when we handle

00:55:49.650 --> 00:55:53.019
our business. bookkeeping and accounting process.

00:55:53.340 --> 00:55:56.280
Get friendly with the money. Understand it. Not

00:55:56.280 --> 00:55:58.239
be afraid of it. Understand how we can make it

00:55:58.239 --> 00:56:00.900
grow. Understand how we can keep more of it,

00:56:00.900 --> 00:56:04.139
right, in our business, right? And so that's

00:56:04.139 --> 00:56:06.559
what compassionate accounting is about. Teaching

00:56:06.559 --> 00:56:09.280
it in a way that anyone can understand. Teaching

00:56:09.280 --> 00:56:11.900
it in a way that it addresses mindset and money

00:56:11.900 --> 00:56:16.159
trauma. And it can help you be successful in

00:56:16.159 --> 00:56:19.539
your business where the key goal is for you to

00:56:19.539 --> 00:56:22.579
have financial freedom. So, you got to deal with

00:56:22.579 --> 00:56:26.059
the money part of it. Right, I do. Yes. I don't

00:56:26.059 --> 00:56:29.320
know... Yes, we all... And it's not something

00:56:29.320 --> 00:56:31.900
to be ashamed of if it's something that you struggle

00:56:31.900 --> 00:56:34.119
with, because we all know someone who's been

00:56:34.119 --> 00:56:37.119
rich, wealthy, or famous, who then got broke,

00:56:37.840 --> 00:56:41.780
who then owed back taxes, right, who died with

00:56:41.780 --> 00:56:44.500
zero money, and that's because they had money

00:56:44.500 --> 00:56:46.699
trauma. That's because they didn't deal with,

00:56:46.840 --> 00:56:48.760
they didn't look at their, they weren't comfortable

00:56:48.760 --> 00:56:50.800
looking at their numbers or discussing their

00:56:50.800 --> 00:56:53.579
numbers. Right? They, they felt like, oh, let

00:56:53.579 --> 00:56:56.199
me let somebody else do that. As opposed to,

00:56:56.360 --> 00:56:58.980
I need to know where my money is going. We as

00:56:58.980 --> 00:57:00.760
business owners need to know where our money

00:57:00.760 --> 00:57:05.000
is going. And there's a myth, right? I think

00:57:05.000 --> 00:57:08.500
even in authorities, but I know I'm black, so

00:57:08.500 --> 00:57:11.860
I'm talking about the black community where people

00:57:11.860 --> 00:57:18.130
of certain age group will not talk about money

00:57:18.130 --> 00:57:20.750
or didn't talk about money. And I don't think

00:57:20.750 --> 00:57:23.889
that was, it's not the wisest because you need

00:57:23.889 --> 00:57:27.570
to teach the next generation on how to invest

00:57:27.570 --> 00:57:30.929
or what to do and how to save and what to spend

00:57:30.929 --> 00:57:34.170
money on, all that kind of stuff. Can you speak

00:57:34.170 --> 00:57:37.309
to that about the myth of money and finances

00:57:37.309 --> 00:57:42.110
and not speaking on it? Yes. What we don't discuss,

00:57:42.750 --> 00:57:45.190
we... When we don't discuss things, we have a

00:57:45.190 --> 00:57:47.630
very low level of understanding of them. So,

00:57:47.630 --> 00:57:49.710
if you're not discussing money with your family,

00:57:49.730 --> 00:57:52.349
with your kids, they're going to have a very

00:57:52.349 --> 00:57:55.969
low level of understanding of how to deal with

00:57:55.969 --> 00:58:01.190
money, right? So, let's say we come from a generations

00:58:01.190 --> 00:58:04.190
or generations or a family environment where

00:58:04.190 --> 00:58:06.809
money wasn't spoke of, like it was not your business

00:58:06.809 --> 00:58:09.030
to know how much money I make. You know, it's

00:58:09.030 --> 00:58:11.489
not your business to know what our expenses are

00:58:11.489 --> 00:58:14.030
and how we deal with that. Well, that's a cycle

00:58:14.030 --> 00:58:18.610
we have to break, right? Especially entrepreneurs,

00:58:18.849 --> 00:58:21.929
because if we're building legacy, you don't want

00:58:21.929 --> 00:58:26.869
to build a legacy for a family that has a broke

00:58:26.869 --> 00:58:29.989
mindset, because it's going to go to waste. You

00:58:29.989 --> 00:58:32.869
want to build legacy and educate your family

00:58:32.869 --> 00:58:36.530
on, this is how we deal with money. This is how

00:58:36.530 --> 00:58:39.510
we invest our money. This is how we reinvest

00:58:39.510 --> 00:58:42.820
in our business with money. It's not just for

00:58:42.820 --> 00:58:46.199
spending fearlessly, but it's also not for penny

00:58:46.199 --> 00:58:49.159
pension and just keeping it in a bank account.

00:58:50.079 --> 00:58:52.340
These are the things we do with money. So you

00:58:52.340 --> 00:58:54.900
want to, as an entrepreneur, as your business

00:58:54.900 --> 00:58:58.000
grows, you want to make sure that you are tapping

00:58:58.000 --> 00:59:01.659
into resources for how do I invest this money?

00:59:01.920 --> 00:59:04.639
And while that person is telling you how to invest

00:59:04.639 --> 00:59:07.719
it, that you have your kids at that table too.

00:59:08.219 --> 00:59:10.909
So they learn while you're learning. So they

00:59:10.909 --> 00:59:13.289
can ask questions while you're asking questions.

00:59:13.590 --> 00:59:15.789
So you're not the one with all the knowledge

00:59:15.789 --> 00:59:19.550
and you're hoping they learn how to handle money,

00:59:19.849 --> 00:59:21.630
but you're sharing that knowledge with them at

00:59:21.630 --> 00:59:24.170
the same time. So that's how you break that cycle.

00:59:24.309 --> 00:59:26.750
You bring them to the table when you have those

00:59:26.750 --> 00:59:29.530
money talks, because you're building this legacy

00:59:29.530 --> 00:59:33.130
to leave it for them, right? You want to know

00:59:33.130 --> 00:59:36.299
they know how to handle it. Right, exactly. Because

00:59:36.299 --> 00:59:38.880
that too, that too can keep you from building

00:59:38.880 --> 00:59:40.739
a bigger business because in the back end mind,

00:59:40.840 --> 00:59:42.679
you're thinking, well, they just go run through

00:59:42.679 --> 00:59:45.099
it. They don't know what to do with it. This

00:59:45.099 --> 00:59:47.340
is how you remedy that. Bring them to the money

00:59:47.340 --> 00:59:50.199
top table. Right. Right. And if you're talking

00:59:50.199 --> 00:59:52.280
about curses, the way to do it is communication.

00:59:52.880 --> 00:59:56.780
Yes. Make the cycle. Yes, definitely. Well, thank

00:59:56.780 --> 01:00:00.039
you for being here. We can talk. some more, but

01:00:00.039 --> 01:00:02.920
I know the audience, this is about their time

01:00:02.920 --> 01:00:07.340
where they're just saying goodbye. As your last

01:00:07.340 --> 01:00:09.900
words on this podcast this time, what would you

01:00:09.900 --> 01:00:12.960
like to share with people? What I would like

01:00:12.960 --> 01:00:15.519
to share is for black women entrepreneurs, what

01:00:15.519 --> 01:00:19.880
I want you to internalize and give yourself permission

01:00:19.880 --> 01:00:23.000
to believe is that you are worthy of building

01:00:23.000 --> 01:00:26.280
wealth while also maintaining your joy and your

01:00:26.280 --> 01:00:28.969
health. Like I want you to not believe that you

01:00:28.969 --> 01:00:32.110
have to sacrifice your joy or your health to

01:00:32.110 --> 01:00:34.250
build wealth. You're worthy of having all three

01:00:34.250 --> 01:00:38.210
of those. So please be sure to tend to all three.

01:00:38.269 --> 01:00:42.530
Be joyous in your business journey. Be healthy,

01:00:42.989 --> 01:00:45.130
right? Don't be just eating everything all times

01:00:45.130 --> 01:00:48.369
of the day and not exercising. Be healthy on

01:00:48.369 --> 01:00:50.469
your business journey. You deserve to invest

01:00:50.469 --> 01:00:53.849
time in that and build your wealth, right? So

01:00:53.849 --> 01:00:57.039
don't have it. Don't Set up a goal where you

01:00:57.039 --> 01:00:59.119
are putting your joy and health while lay away.

01:00:59.199 --> 01:01:01.719
Like, when I make this amount of money, then

01:01:01.719 --> 01:01:03.880
I'm going to be happy. Then I'm going to start

01:01:03.880 --> 01:01:06.280
going to the gym. Then I'm going to start eating

01:01:06.280 --> 01:01:08.820
better. No, no, no, no. Do all three. You are

01:01:08.820 --> 01:01:12.199
worthy of all three. You deserve all three. Thank

01:01:12.199 --> 01:01:14.920
you. I love that. Don't put that stuff on their

01:01:14.920 --> 01:01:19.300
way. That's right. That's great. How do people

01:01:19.300 --> 01:01:21.820
get in touch with you? Okay, they can reach me

01:01:21.820 --> 01:01:24.960
by going to my website. My podcast is the Women

01:01:24.960 --> 01:01:28.559
of Color and Business podcast on YouTube. It's

01:01:28.559 --> 01:01:33.119
at WOCIB. the Initials for Women of Color in

01:01:33.119 --> 01:01:37.780
Business. So at WOCIB podcast, they can subscribe

01:01:37.780 --> 01:01:42.920
to my YouTube channel. My website is WOCIB .org.

01:01:43.500 --> 01:01:46.260
They can join my mailing list on the website

01:01:46.260 --> 01:01:49.280
and I look forward to connecting with them. That's

01:01:49.280 --> 01:01:52.719
amazing. First of all, thank you for being a

01:01:52.719 --> 01:01:55.579
voice for Black Women Entrepreneurs, just being

01:01:55.579 --> 01:01:57.760
here and sharing that. It's a voice that needs

01:01:57.760 --> 01:02:00.289
to be heard. And I thank you for... being on

01:02:00.289 --> 01:02:03.530
this podcast, sharing it. And I don't know, it's

01:02:03.530 --> 01:02:07.670
been an amazing conversation. And again, one

01:02:07.670 --> 01:02:10.150
day when I get a studio and I invite you in and

01:02:10.150 --> 01:02:13.750
we'll have one or one in person, it may go longer

01:02:13.750 --> 01:02:17.269
than an hour. Wonderful, I would love it. And

01:02:17.269 --> 01:02:19.190
Michael, thank you so much for the invitation

01:02:19.190 --> 01:02:22.090
to be here. I really appreciate being in this

01:02:22.090 --> 01:02:25.889
space. I love your energy and I love our conversation.

01:02:26.010 --> 01:02:28.750
I hope your audience enjoyed it. I hope so too.

01:02:28.889 --> 01:02:33.269
And this is a time where I pose a question to

01:02:33.269 --> 01:02:35.809
the audience, which is, what's one thing from

01:02:35.809 --> 01:02:37.710
the conversation that you've heard, you know,

01:02:37.750 --> 01:02:40.769
we talk about purpose, joy, self -worth, and

01:02:40.769 --> 01:02:44.110
money. And so what I want to know is what's one

01:02:44.110 --> 01:02:46.309
thing you're doing right now to build a business

01:02:46.309 --> 01:02:49.690
that aligns with who you truly honor? And I want

01:02:49.690 --> 01:02:51.369
you to go ahead and drop that in the comments.

01:02:51.530 --> 01:02:54.469
And as we always say, let's make thriving our

01:02:54.469 --> 01:02:56.730
new normal. And I'll see you next week.