everybody this is neogentrics and this is again
food for thought thoughts if it were you now
like i said before we are doing a set series
for communication and proper things that everybody
needs for that so we're gonna pick up where we
left off um i know the last time we covered interpersonal
communication uh today i'm going to cover the
principles of interpersonal communication uh
so don't expect this one to be too too long um
and we'll go ahead and jump right in okay um
one of the things that i wanted to point out
here is that uh something that is common all
interpersonal communications are some basic principles
uh these uh principles govern the effectiveness
of our communication they may be simple to understand
but can take a lifetime to master okay first
things first i want you to understand this interpersonal
communication is not optional okay we may try
we may at times try not to communicate but not
communicating is not an option okay in fact the
harder we try not to communicate the more we
actually do and by not communicating we are communicating
something perhaps that we are shy perhaps we
are angry sulking or that we're too busy okay
ignoring somebody is communicating with them
even when you're not intending to say something
we may not tell them we are ignoring them but
through non -verbal communication we hope to
make that pretty much apparent in which case
you're still communicating We communicate far
and more honestly with non -verbal communication
than we do with our actual words. Our body posture
and position, eye contact or lack thereof, even
the smallest and more subtle of mannerisms are
always communicating with others. Furthermore,
we are constantly being communicated to. We pick
up signals from others and interpret them in
certain ways. uh we understand is based on how
skilled we are at interpreting interpersonal
communication between each other okay so one
thing to keep in mind once it's out it's out
okay uh the process of interpersonal communication
is irreversible okay you can't wish you hadn't
said something or uh and you can apologize for
something you said and later regret uh regret
it but you cannot take it back okay Just keep
that in mind. We often behave and therefore communicate
to others based on previous communication encounters.
These encounters may or may not be appropriate
points of reference. We stereotype people, often
subconsciously, maybe by gender, social standings,
religion, race, age, or other factors. Stereotypes
are basically generalizations often exaggerated.
Because of these stereotypes, When we communicate
with people, we can carry with us certain preconceptions
of what they are thinking or how they likely
are to behave. We may have ideas about the outcome
of the conversation before we ever actually have
it. I can actually give an example of this. As
you can probably tell, I sound pretty educated.
I actually am. But when someone calls and talks
to me over the phone and say they haven't met
me before, they hear me talk, they hear that
I sound educated, but then when they actually
meet me in person, I am dark -skinned, okay?
I am mixed. But as soon as they see me, the first
thing they say is like, wait, you're not white?
I mean, how am I supposed to respond to that?
So, but I don't let it show. Not neither with
my body nor my reaction. Instead, I just apologize
for breaking their expectations. These preconceptions
affect how we speak to others and the words we
use and the tone of voice. We naturally communicate
in a way that we think is most appropriate for
a person we are talking to. Unfortunately, our
preconceptions of others are often incorrect.
This can mean that our communication is inappropriate
and therefore more likely to be misunderstood.
And as the goal to all communication has to be
understanding, it can be said that we have failed
to basically communicate. By communicating this
way, being influenced by preconceived ideas,
we feedback further stereotypes to the people
we are speaking to, thus exasperating the problem.
So with this being said start all interpersonal
communications with an open mind listen to what
is being said rather than hearing what you expect
to hear and You are less likely to be misunderstood
or say things that you will later regret, okay?
Okay next thing to keep in mind is the endless
complexity of uh the conversations okay no form
of communication is simple there are many reasons
why communication is taking place and how it
is taking place, and how messages are being broadcast
and or received. Variables in communication such
as your language, environment, and distractions,
as well as the individual involved in communicating,
all have an effect on how messages are sent,
received, and interpreted. Keep this in mind.
When we communicate verbally, we swap words.
Words that have maybe subtly different meanings
to different people in different contexts. It
could be argued that Words are in fact just tokens
we exchange with each other and that they have
no inherent meaning at all. Okay? We can communicate
the same thing to different individuals, but
each person may have a different understanding
or interpretation of the message. At any point
in communication, any misunderstanding, regardless
of how small it may seem, will have an effect
on the message that's actually being communicated
or received. Okay? So with this in mind... Keep
in mind the context of communication. All communication
has a context. Communication happens for a reason.
Therefore, this is a major thing to keep in mind.
Communication can fail because one or more of
the participants overlook the context of what's
being said. And to help avoid misunderstandings
and therefore communicate more effectively, it
is important that the context of the communication
is understood by all. Why is the communication
happening? Is it important that the participants
are on the same wavelength so that they understand
why the communication is occurring? It may be
useful to start a larger conversation by explaining
why it is even happening. Knowing the why for
communication is occurring is an important first
step. There are, however, problems that can affect
the context of the communication, though. Keep
this in mind. First one being timing. Timing
is fundamental to successful communication as
well as considering a suitable time to hold a
conversation. You should make sure that there
is enough time to cover all that is needed, including
time to clarify and negotiate any discrepancies.
Talking to an employee about a strategic decision
five minutes before they have to leave the office
for the day, for example, would probably not
be as successful as having the same conversation
that following morning. However, that being said,
he may not even remember what she talked about.
Next would be location. This one should be fairly
obvious, that communication is going to be less
effective if it's conducted in a noisy, uncomfortable,
or busy place. Such places have many distractions
and often a lack of privacy, so keep that in
mind. Last thing to consider for this is misconceptions.
The context of communication is often governed
by our own feelings about it. and as discussed
already we stereotype people and therefore can
develop inaccurate misconceptions and false assumptions
and you know when we communicate we may assume
that all parties know what we're talking about
when in fact they have no idea we know the other
person's views and opinions of the situation
that's another misconception we should not show
any emotion that's also a misconception The biggest
one for me that I have a problem with a lot of
people who talk to me is that they are always
right and you are wrong. Or vice versa. We are
always right and they're wrong. This is the worst
thing that you could possibly do. There are many
other examples of misconceptions. Highlighting
the importance of careful reflection and clarification
in all communications is definitely key. Okay?
So, with that, finally... out of the way okay
we can get started next time and i know this
one was fairly short on barriers to effective
communication like i mentioned before to help
improve your communication skills again this
has been thoughts if it were you food for thought
my name is neogentrics thank you for listening
and enjoy the rest of your day