Welcome back, everybody. This is Food for Thought,
Thoughts for You by Neogentrics. How are you guys
doing this morning? It is currently 5 o 'clock
in the morning, and we are going to hit a nail
on the head here with something that I found
to be fairly... Well, it's... How do I put this?
It should be understood, but it's often disregarded
as... It's often a disregarded part of communication
and presentation. Okay, and I want to go ahead
and cover it as well. So, you remember we covered
the Hell series a couple weeks back, and I figured
I'd go ahead and move on with that and talk about
some communication skills. That's what we're
going to work on this week. We're going to go
ahead and cover some communication skills. I'm
going to start with one of the ones that a lot
of people don't seem to care about or think is
a... communication, or part of communication
skills, or presentation skills, for that matter.
And that is your personal appearance. Okay? Personal
appearance is often disregarded part of communication
and presentation skills, and when you're speaking
in public, you may want to be, how do I put it?
Let me phrase it like this. When you speak in
public, You may be representing your organization
or just yourself, but it's still you in the front
lines. And it is you that the other people in
the group and the audience see before you have
a time to actually open your mouth or give an
account of yourself, certain assumptions, both
consciously or subconsciously, whether they've
been made or not. You're the first thing they
see. Now, I know the first thing a lot of people
tell everybody is first impressions are verily.
Very important. And, you know, they can be about
attitude as well as dressing as well. So, I mean,
visual impact is at least as important as your
verbal impact. People will very quickly make
assumptions based on your facial expressions,
the clothes you wear, and how well you groom
yourself and your body language as well. And
these are things that a lot of people don't consider
when they get ready to do things. All right?
You can talk about whatever you want. You can
present whatever you want, but how you present
yourself physically is just as important as what
you say verbally. Alright? Let's talk about something
related to the same topic. Your facial expressions,
okay? First off, little can be done to alter
your face, but a lot can be done about the expression
that's on it. So let's go ahead and start with
that. However the day started, and whatever minor
crisis has occurred along the way, people have
not come to see you with a dark expression on
your face. So, it is your duty, to yourself as
well as the organization that you represent,
to convey a claim. Sorry, calm. Yeah, well, claim
too, yeah. Claim a calm... Friendly and professional
exterior, despite how you may feel on the inside.
You try to smile and be optimistic, and appear
that way as well, regardless of how you feel.
Okay? Your personal image is what we're working
on here. The reflection that stares back at you
from a mirror is not necessarily a true likeness
of the face known to family, friends, and colleagues,
because they will see you off guard, in repose,
concentrated on a task, or listening to them.
How many people can honestly admit to looking
in a mirror without altering their expression?
Think about that one for a minute. It's not possible.
It's quite natural to play to a mirror, possibly
by raising an eyebrow, pulling a face, or smiling
at the reflection. This is why people often feel
self -conscious when they see a bad photograph
of themselves. Because in a mirror, you can fix
it. and a photograph. It's permanent. The real
you, alright, it is human nature to make compromises.
All individuals change their approach depending
on the people they meet and what they feel is
expected from them. Your on -duty self, the one
who functions in public, is different from your
off -duty self, the one concerned with family,
friends, home, so on and so forth. Everyone has
many and varied roles in life, so you can be
one person and be a parent, son, daughter, brother,
sister, friend, advisor, patient, client, customer,
all in one day. You can be all those things simultaneously.
These differing roles all require that a particular
quality and skill in personal communication and
can also come upon different requirements of
attitude and or appearance. as far as your visual
image is concerned. So your external image or
appearance is how you are seen by the world,
whereas the real you, not a role model of the
person you would like to be, is someone who is
honest with themselves, okay? And don't worry,
I'll go more into that in detail when I cover
nonverbal communication, okay? Next, let's cover
your clothes and the way you groom yourself.
So, ask yourself this question. What sort of
external image is appropriate to the organization
that you represent? Let's just think about that
one for a minute. Only you can answer this question.
Due to the nature of the work, some organizations
are happy for people to be casually dressed,
whilst others may expect a smarter attire, more
professional, if you will. It's important to
be suitably dressed within expected limits, okay?
Nobody expects you to be packaged into something
you are not, but your appearance is a reflection
of your own self -esteem, and you should aim
to present yourself to the best possible advantage.
Whilst you might be casually dressed when working
within your organization, a more formal approach
may well be preferable when representing your
organization outside or in externing... I'm sorry.
external meetings. So good grooming and a tidy
appearance is preferable, whether casual or formally
dressed. On that note, your body language. Understanding
your body language is one of the most important
aspects of personal presentation. The image conveyed
by the physical self should support and enhance
what is being communicated verbally. If the visual
image differs widely from the spoken message,
is often the nonverbal account that's believed.
You can say, I row boats up and down a hill because
it's fun, but then your body is saying, you know,
I wouldn't do that even if you paid me. Well,
which do you think the people is going to believe?
It's true what they say when they say actions
speak louder than words. You can say whatever
you want, but if your body is doing the opposite
and you're unaware of this, you're basically
telling them that you're saying one thing and
those who can't see you will believe it, but
the ones who can won't. Keep that in mind. The
way you sit, stand, your gestures, your mannerisms,
your facial expressions will say more about you.
and how you are feeling at any given time than
the words you are using. When individuals are
nervous or uneasy, their behavioral bad habits
become more pronounced. That's why when your
parents tell you what you do at home you will
do in the real world, they're not kidding. It's
because you've become comfortable doing it, and
you don't realize you're doing it anymore. Awareness
of your body language, of how you behave under
pressure, what signals you are unconsciously
giving, how nerves and stress affect you physically.
Can you help understand? how you come across
to others, okay? It can also explain how the
wrong impression is sometimes given and how confusion
can occur, okay? I have to admit, I am guilty
of this myself, okay? You need to work on your
body language. There's different ways of doing
this where you can improve your personal presentation,
okay, as well. Let me give an example. When concentrating
on something rather hard, your expression may
look troubled, when in reality you're not anxious
at all, just absorbed in what you're doing. This
does not mean that you should go around with
a fixed smile on your face, but just be aware
that your physical self might send one set of
signals when your mind is involved elsewhere.
Body language can also be used as a mask to convey
contrary feelings. How often you nodded firmly
when you... Did not understand a word. Smiled
when your instinct was to scowl or clap enthusiastically
at the end of a talk. That nearly puts you to
sleep. These are things to keep in mind. In these
cases, you're not being hypocritical, but you're
using body language positively as the mechanism
of good manners. And it doesn't happen overnight,
I assure you. It takes work. Our gestures are
part of our personalities, a part of how we express
ourselves. Hand -arm movements can add emphasis,
aid explanation, convey enthusiasm. They only
become a negative signal when repeated so often
that they become irritating to the observer.
However, listeners can become so sidetracked
by the sight of someone constantly playing with
their hair, tapping on the table with a pen,
that they no longer listen to the spoken words.
These negative signals can break down the communication
process very quickly. Okay? One of the last things
I want to go ahead and cover here is positive
and negative body language, okay? Now, I would
go more in -depth into body language, but seeing
how this is basically just... I'm basically just
covering your physical appearance on this one.
I'm only going to cover a little bit about it.
Positive things that your body language can include
that will help improve what you're doing or what
you're talking about as well, okay? Maintaining
eye contact with people you are speaking to.
Smiling if appropriate. That doesn't mean you
smile at something creepy. But especially at
greetings and at the end of a conversation. Sitting
squarely on a chair, as uncomfortable as it may
sound. Leaning slightly forward. This indicates
you are actually paying attention. Even if you
aren't. Nodding in agreement. A firm handshake.
Presenting a calm exterior, even when you're
pissed. And looking interested, even if you aren't.
Things to avoid. Okay, and we're going to close
out with this. Negative body language that you
do not want. Not looking at the person when speaking.
Tapping a foot or finger or a pen on the table.
Or period. Rocking back and forth. That is actually
really irritating. Scratching. Constantly clearing
your throat without a reason. Fiddling your hair,
earlobe, jewelry, jackets, glasses. You know,
you get the picture. Picking at fingers or fingernails.
This one's not as bad, but it can be irritating
depending on the person. Yawning. Repeatedly
yawning. Repeatedly looking at your watch or
the clock in the room. Believe me, that is actually
really irritating. Standing too close to each
other. Don't do that, okay? And inattention to
a person who is speaking, okay? Not even paying
attention. These are things just to keep in mind.
It's mostly about how you present yourself that
other people will basically see this and then
know for a fact that what you're trying to say
or do is not what you're really... Into. Okay.
So keep that in mind. Next time we will talk
about nonverbal communication. And your body
language. As well. I'm actually going to go over
that. In its entirety. And have a great rest
of your day. Thank you for listening to my podcast.
I know it's been a while since I've released
one. And I'm sorry about that. Look forward to
another one later on today. And we'll get ourselves
caught up. To the standard that I have about.
three or four a week okay also uh gloria tp5
a good close friend of mine uh she is really
really excited because her next book is coming
out so go ahead and pre -order that and show
your support and enjoy the rest of your day okay