All right, and we're back. We're going to go
ahead and talk about three important things in
which guys can do to improve their communication
skills as far as when talking to women, okay?
Like I mentioned earlier on in this podcast,
you need to be attentive, okay? In the courting
stage of dating men, it's usually very, you need
to be usually very, very attentive, okay? Over
time, that attention... Attemptiveness can sometimes
get lost like I mentioned before but you need
to make your woman feel loved and cherished Okay,
bring her flowers surprise her with her favorite
candy compliment her admire her dress say things
you like, you know You have a gorgeous smile
things of that nature. You know, you want to
make her feel Special like she's the most important
thing to you in the world, okay? To like I mentioned
before listen do not try to fix the problem okay
unfortunately most women don't process problems
by others giving them a strategy okay many men
tend to solve problems by finding and offering
solutions and although the solutions may be sound
women often just want to be heard like i said
before so the next time your woman is blurting
out her stresses of the day look at her and just
listen and say it sounds like you had a tough
day you know and follow that up with a hug or
something don't don't try to fix the issue more
than likely that's just gonna make it worse all
right and then with that being said let's move
on to the third and final topic for this uh for
communications is resist defending yourself okay
this i'm gonna go ahead and say right now does
not help a guy any way shape or form okay this
is where a man's ego can get in the way okay
instead of listening to what a woman is saying
and seeing her point of view man you at times
will start to defend yourself okay men often
think that they're just being they're being attacked
and so they immediately go into a defensive mode
defensive type like stand and instead of instead
you need to repeat her position back to her by
saying so you feel i should or for the sake of
this example you know so you feel i should spend
more time with you You know, you're not necessarily
agreeing with her, but she will feel hurt at
least just for the sake of this example. You
know, overall, I mean, you know, it's better
to just, you know, hear what she says. Listen
to what she she's saying is the issue. Look,
evaluate. what she's talking about related to
you and see if there really is a problem before
you open your mouth and if there is don't say
anything to her like I said before you know just
agree or at least you know make it known that
you know you'll you'll try to do something about
it to make to improve the situation you know
and then go and take care of it yourself overall
you know take a look at what you can do to keep
things alive with your girl and you know evaluate
how you are communicating you know you'd be amazed
how quickly things can change and improve but
just a small a few small shifts in the way you
talk you know the way you respond to her instead
of having to go see a relationship counselor
like every so often you know oh yeah and then
one other thing i want to go ahead and point
out right now the best relationship advice i
could give you um is to is to never stop seducing
her in a way in a good way you know and one of
the biggest mistakes guys make is to stop being
the seducer as soon as a girl calls them that
calls them uh her boyfriend a real seducer knows
that the beginning of a relationship is not the
end of seduction it's just an intersect uh interstation
if you will that craves for a change of playing
the game you know or rather a chance to keep
playing you know the game is still going and
we'll make and it remains exactly the same okay
Every word, every touch, every kiss is part of
that same seduction. It's using that word loosely,
of course, here. No matter if you know her for
two days or two decades, it doesn't matter. A
man who ignores this fact are the ones who stop
making an effort. Keep this in mind. Who settles
down without making settling down worthwhile
for the girl they are with? These are the guys
who ask themselves, why did she leave me? while
she's holding the hands of another man who's
under the universal law that seduction never
ends, okay? And again, like I said, you know,
I'm using the word seduction here, but basically,
you know, it's being active with her, being intimate
with her, even in some cases, you know, basically
the same way that you used to court her to make
her feel special out of the world, like she's
the most beautiful girl you've ever met, you
know, this process continues even after that
because she wants to feel wanted. by someone
and you want that someone to be you okay okay
so i mean continuing with the last point here
you know with that being said um guys never assume
that your feelings and your opinions don't matter,
okay? They matter to her just as much as, you
know, hers should matter to you, okay? Don't
assume she's right, okay? Just because she's
a woman, that's one thing that does often piss
off women as well, you know? making sure that
she's happy and what she her needs are met is
a good thing but always assuming that she's right
will make her feel like you're just saying uh
-huh uh -huh yes uh -huh sure and no woman wants
to hear that okay men often abdicate their opinions
and feelings under the false assumption because
of that that women know how to handle relationships
better than men no that is not the case a lot
of times they are looking at to the men to be
the one who leads the relationship okay your
thoughts your feelings they do count don't be
afraid to speak up and share your ideas for resolving
problems and creating better outcomes but at
the same time don't be overly overbearing and
overly pushy about it either okay you need to
learn to master your partner's emotional uh control
panel if you will as well each woman has their
own uh control panel of hot buttons the issues
that either upset her or calm her down okay there's
no need to court unnecessary conflict if you
can avoid it most issues are unavoidable But
most issues are avoidable while some are not
okay all you have to do is listen and observe
and Just so you know, no, they're not crazy.
Okay, there's a reason for their behavior. Keep
this in mind, you know They're always telling
you what they want what they need. It's just
the way they say it It can be hard to understand.
Sometimes you need to consider this as well.
Your job is to hear what what they're saying
and help them to achieve the loving harmony that
they want from you without you know making it
obvious to the world or causing any major issues
okay and at the same time you know small consistent
acts of kindness help boost your partner's passion
and uh attraction to you okay you know showing
your appreciation for your partner is like putting
miracle grow on her sexual desires for you i
mean it's it's amazing how that stuff works especially
for plants think about that in the same sense
as the way you're treating her okay like i mentioned
before she wants to know that she's special she
wants to uh she wants for you ah let me try that
again She wants to know that she has value to
her, okay? At the same time, she wants to make
sure that while she values you, you value her
as well, okay? You know, thoughtful words and
meaningful actions throughout the day will warm
your woman's heart like you have no idea. Like
that moment when you take a fresh cake out of
the oven, you ice it, and you sit down with a
slice of it, you're ready to eat it with a cup
of milk, okay? It's the recipe for creating fireworks
in the middle of... at night okay it helps out
everybody and both sides usually win okay and
at the same time and we go ahead and throw this
in here as well in this piece men often accept
that relationships are scary and heck they are
scary for a good sum of people but not everyone
okay you know but you need to not let that you
know put you off and giving them your all okay
you know putting your trust in someone it leaves
you open to all kinds of hurt and while this
is true you know no one wants to feel vulnerable
like that and it's definitely easier just to
build a wall around your heart and not let anyone
in but um in too deep to save yourself from getting
hurt but at the end you know you're you're just
hurting yourself more so than the other person
because you're stopping yourself from experiencing
life at its best you need to embrace the fear
and don't run from it and enjoy the riot who
knows everything may work out for the best but
you only know if you're willing to take that
risk and most men you know out there aren't going
to do that you know by the time it's time to
come around for marriage and they manage to get
the question out and you're now uh loving partners
who are about to get married i forget at the
moment i can't think of the word uh engaged there
it is you know they chicken out like close to
the end and say i'm sorry i i don't think i can
do this you know and that leaves the woman hurt
or scarred severely okay you don't want to do
that okay one of the last things i want to cover
tonight and i want to make this known right now
for men is two things becoming too comfortable
in a relationship and not being the alpha male
okay one of the main issues that you'll have
with a woman is you'll be you'll you'll not be
an alpha alpha male okay the majority of men
whether they're younger or older rich or not
rich you know they generally prefer an alpha
male okay this is how you are wired This is why
you often hear women say, I want a real man or
be a man. However, most people think an alpha
male is synonymous with being a jerk, and that's
not the case. Actually, being alpha means breaking
through barriers, being fearless, taking control
of situations, not of women. Keep that in mind,
not of women. Having a plan and being focused.
This means you contact a woman and ask her out.
Pick her up if she agrees. Don't ask her to meet
you halfway. Choose the restaurant pay. Do not
ask to split the bill. Also, hail a cab if you
need to. Speak up if someone is bothering her.
Set boundaries. Call her out if she's being disrespectful.
When a woman loses interest or isn't interested
to begin with, it's probably because you're behaving
more like a beta instead of an alpha male. um
and that's one of the things you need to keep
in mind at the same time you know guys can get
way too comfortable in a relationship and they'll
forget about all the little stuff that made her
fall in love with him in the first place you
know in most happy successful relationships it's
a string of small expressions of kindness respect
and romance that often matter the most and like
i mentioned before you know that this is the
thoughtful gestures that make her feel valued
and loved you know such like i said you know
Such as things like holding her hand, kissing
her hello, saying I love you, pulling her in
for a cuddle, complimenting her when she's made
an effort to look good or been extra friendly
to your terrible aunts that get on your nerves,
what have you. Or answering her questions, really
listening to her, remembering small details about
what she likes, saying thank you, of course.
or you know just surprising her with a little
something special just because you know it's
things like this that guys often forget and you
know it causes division you know you need to
be brave be you and be loved that's some of the
main focus focal points for guys you know peace
Make peace with your fears and insecurities to
help diminish their power. When you learn how
to manage your fear, you can become confident
in dating and relationships. To overcome fear
and empower yourself in knowledge, become a student
of relationships instead of being the victim
of them. Study, love, read, listen, watch, listen.
Find every way you can to learn about how men
and women should work together so that you can
become both a student and a master at the same
time. While that being said, when fear loses
its power, you'll become unafraid to be yourself.
And you'll learn to show up, to be a witness,
to be real in your relationships because there
is nothing to lose and nothing to be rejected.
Rejection takes on a new meaning and it's no
longer because there is something inherently
wrong, broken, or inadequate within you. There's
a great power in adequacy. Authenticity, I'm
sorry. once you know how to master fear and allow
yourself to be authentic your chances of finding
love increase exponentially and at the same time
it helps increase your relationship status with
the person you're with okay the walls that stand
between you and a successful relationship will
be completely destroyed and you can find freedom
that only love can provide and these are things
like i mentioned before that guys need to focus
on a lot especially you know uh let's see here
That is, I do believe, all I have to say for
tonight. Next, I have some information as far
as dating is concerned. I might bring that up
tonight or I might talk about it a little bit
later. We'll see what happens. Anyway, enjoy
the rest of your morning. Everybody get some
sleep if you're up and you're getting ready to
go to bed. And as for those who's getting up
and now getting ready to go to work, I wish you
the best and be blessed, okay? I know I'm not
always making my podcast at the most convenient
times, but I still thank everybody for listening.
And like I said, if you have any comments, concerns,
or I said something that upset you, what have
you, you know, I want to hear that. Go ahead
and hit the calling button and let me know what's
going on. And we'll go ahead and resolve that
as well. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.