WEBVTT 00:00:11.570 --> 00:00:14.529 Good morning, everybody. It is 5 a .m. here in 00:00:14.529 --> 00:00:17.910 Houston. The temperature outside is, I do believe, 00:00:18.070 --> 00:00:21.309 50 degrees. This is neogentrics. I don't know 00:00:21.309 --> 00:00:23.269 what's up with the weather outside. It's kind 00:00:23.269 --> 00:00:26.129 of warm, kind of muggy. It actually looks like 00:00:26.129 --> 00:00:28.070 it's about to rain. If I'm not mistaken, it probably 00:00:28.070 --> 00:00:31.820 has already started. Anyway, the topic I'm going 00:00:31.820 --> 00:00:33.880 to be covering this week is the moral series, 00:00:34.039 --> 00:00:35.960 and I did say that I was going to pick up today 00:00:35.960 --> 00:00:38.799 with another topic. However, I've had a couple 00:00:38.799 --> 00:00:40.960 of requests on self -esteem, so I'm going to 00:00:40.960 --> 00:00:43.340 go ahead and cover that real quick today, and 00:00:43.340 --> 00:00:45.899 then I'm going to pick back up with the next 00:00:45.899 --> 00:00:49.539 moral, okay? First off, let me give you the definition 00:00:49.539 --> 00:00:53.179 of what self -esteem actually is. It's considered 00:00:53.179 --> 00:00:56.340 to be the confidence in one's own worth or abilities. 00:00:56.960 --> 00:01:00.439 Basically, self -respect. Pride, dignity, or 00:01:00.439 --> 00:01:02.719 self -regard. That's the best way I can put that 00:01:02.719 --> 00:01:07.260 for just about anybody. Self -esteem basically 00:01:07.260 --> 00:01:09.900 reflects an individual's overall subjective emotion 00:01:09.900 --> 00:01:15.819 evaluation of him or herself's own worth. It 00:01:15.819 --> 00:01:18.840 is a decision made by an individual as an attitude 00:01:18.840 --> 00:01:21.459 towards themselves. Basically, it encompasses 00:01:21.459 --> 00:01:23.780 their beliefs of what they think they are if 00:01:23.780 --> 00:01:25.859 they're confident or worthy or not. Basically, 00:01:26.040 --> 00:01:29.420 it's an emotional state, such as when you feel 00:01:29.420 --> 00:01:32.959 triumph, despair, pride, or even shame. And don't 00:01:32.959 --> 00:01:34.719 worry, I will cover those topics in the future. 00:01:35.200 --> 00:01:37.560 The self -concept is what we think about the 00:01:37.560 --> 00:01:40.700 self. In other words, whether or not you think 00:01:40.700 --> 00:01:43.719 you're worthy. Self -esteem is attractive as 00:01:43.719 --> 00:01:47.280 social psychologists construct because of researches 00:01:47.280 --> 00:01:51.000 have basically conceptualized it as an influential 00:01:51.000 --> 00:01:55.640 predictor of certain outcomes. Such as, you know, 00:01:55.780 --> 00:01:58.180 academic achievement, happiness, satisfaction, 00:01:58.799 --> 00:02:02.299 marriage, relationships, criminal behavior, and 00:02:02.299 --> 00:02:08.020 what have you. Issues that arise from... not 00:02:08.020 --> 00:02:11.460 having enough self -esteem would be worthlessness, 00:02:11.699 --> 00:02:17.659 okay? Or depression. Now, I don't remember if 00:02:17.659 --> 00:02:19.979 I covered depression or not. It might be in one 00:02:19.979 --> 00:02:22.560 of the previous episodes. If it isn't, then look 00:02:22.560 --> 00:02:25.699 forward to that episode. But I'm going to go 00:02:25.699 --> 00:02:30.400 ahead and cover worthlessness right now. Worthlessness 00:02:30.400 --> 00:02:33.219 is basically feeling that you aren't worthy. 00:02:34.539 --> 00:02:39.030 If anyone's ever asked this question, That means 00:02:39.030 --> 00:02:41.389 that you don't have a whole lot of self -esteem. 00:02:41.789 --> 00:02:45.090 I can't blame you for this, but still, we can 00:02:45.090 --> 00:02:47.289 do something about it. It's the strongest feeling 00:02:47.289 --> 00:02:49.490 that can possibly lead to suicide in depressed 00:02:49.490 --> 00:02:52.210 patients. Many people who experience multiple 00:02:52.210 --> 00:02:54.689 setbacks in their lives, such as job loss, financial 00:02:54.689 --> 00:02:56.969 struggle, divorce, or being overweight, can end 00:02:56.969 --> 00:02:58.849 up feeling like their lives have no meaning, 00:02:58.969 --> 00:03:01.930 and at times feel like there's no prospect of 00:03:01.930 --> 00:03:04.849 improvement, and the more prolonged they are, 00:03:04.930 --> 00:03:07.090 the more likely the patient will suffer from 00:03:07.090 --> 00:03:11.699 depression. Self -worth is how you value yourself 00:03:11.699 --> 00:03:14.479 and it's tied with self -esteem because self 00:03:14.479 --> 00:03:16.819 -esteem is what we feel about ourselves. If you're 00:03:16.819 --> 00:03:19.479 not feeling that you have any self -worth, then 00:03:19.479 --> 00:03:21.780 simply improving self -esteem isn't going to 00:03:21.780 --> 00:03:26.180 be enough and you won't believe it within yourself. 00:03:27.219 --> 00:03:30.699 You need to improve both to get... real results 00:03:30.699 --> 00:03:33.139 and one way to do that is through therapy many 00:03:33.139 --> 00:03:36.180 of many of the same actions improve both self 00:03:36.180 --> 00:03:38.379 -worth and self -esteem because they're so closely 00:03:38.379 --> 00:03:41.419 tied together now let me cover some quick things 00:03:41.419 --> 00:03:43.659 in this episode that you can do to improve on 00:03:43.659 --> 00:03:47.719 self -esteem okay we all make mistakes and concentrating 00:03:47.719 --> 00:03:50.840 on the big picture too much can make you feel 00:03:50.840 --> 00:03:54.139 quite small so especially with things that don't 00:03:54.139 --> 00:03:57.449 go right um rather than striving for perfection 00:03:57.449 --> 00:03:59.830 and comparing yourself to others choose to focus 00:03:59.830 --> 00:04:02.129 on how good you are okay celebrate the things 00:04:02.129 --> 00:04:06.449 you're good at um even the small accomplishments 00:04:06.449 --> 00:04:09.330 okay try avoid looking down at yourself instead 00:04:09.330 --> 00:04:12.490 talk positively about yourself as if you were 00:04:12.490 --> 00:04:15.849 talking to someone else When you talk to others, 00:04:15.969 --> 00:04:18.189 you often value them above yourself and you don't 00:04:18.189 --> 00:04:20.310 want to upset them. So basically do the same 00:04:20.310 --> 00:04:22.550 thing with yourself. By talking to yourself the 00:04:22.550 --> 00:04:24.689 same way, you'll be less likely to use thoughts 00:04:24.689 --> 00:04:27.670 or words that bring you down. Be realistic about 00:04:27.670 --> 00:04:29.769 things. If you're feeling overwhelmed, lower 00:04:29.769 --> 00:04:35.290 your expectations a little. When you've reached 00:04:35.290 --> 00:04:39.170 a goal, celebrate it. This will mean you're more 00:04:39.170 --> 00:04:41.949 likely to achieve the goal and might even surpass 00:04:41.949 --> 00:04:51.259 it. It's very very advisable, okay Actions that 00:04:51.259 --> 00:04:55.920 improve self -worth will be you know, how do 00:04:55.920 --> 00:04:59.519 I put this? Value is about making yourself feel 00:04:59.519 --> 00:05:01.560 like you matter or that you make a difference 00:05:01.560 --> 00:05:03.980 There are two ways to achieve this by helping 00:05:03.980 --> 00:05:08.139 others and by valuing what you already know. 00:05:08.300 --> 00:05:10.459 Start by making a contribution to your community, 00:05:10.560 --> 00:05:13.800 volunteering with people less fortunate than 00:05:13.800 --> 00:05:17.699 you are, so that you can show how much you have 00:05:17.699 --> 00:05:20.839 to be thankful for. By being thankful, you'll 00:05:20.839 --> 00:05:23.600 be able to see what aspects of your day are important. 00:05:23.939 --> 00:05:26.860 Try to pick things each day that you're thankful 00:05:26.860 --> 00:05:29.519 for. Kind of the same point as Thanksgiving, 00:05:29.800 --> 00:05:33.019 but without the Thanksgiving. Anytime you feel 00:05:33.019 --> 00:05:35.329 like you're talking negatively about yourself 00:05:35.329 --> 00:05:38.790 pause stop and think you know about what you 00:05:38.790 --> 00:05:40.389 would say if you were talking to someone else 00:05:40.389 --> 00:05:43.269 instead it's likely you wouldn't be as critical 00:05:43.269 --> 00:05:47.110 okay that's the thought i want people to think 00:05:47.110 --> 00:05:50.009 about today i'm going to cover the depression 00:05:50.009 --> 00:05:58.670 half of it later um but i will cover this little 00:05:58.670 --> 00:06:08.769 bit here right now after this short break So, 00:06:08.829 --> 00:06:11.050 that brings up the question, and I'm going to 00:06:11.050 --> 00:06:13.910 go ahead and cover this now. Why do I feel worthless 00:06:13.910 --> 00:06:18.790 when nothing helps? Well, often feelings of worthlessness 00:06:18.790 --> 00:06:22.110 can be a symptom of depression. Many depression 00:06:22.110 --> 00:06:26.389 disorders leave patients feeling alone, so unworthy 00:06:26.389 --> 00:06:29.149 of social interaction and unworthy of help. The 00:06:29.149 --> 00:06:32.410 trouble is, this is a vicious circle, and those 00:06:32.410 --> 00:06:36.089 feeling often foster great depression, okay? 00:06:36.750 --> 00:06:40.029 In cases like this, you'll need to see a professional. 00:06:40.410 --> 00:06:45.209 Finding professionals help means considering 00:06:45.209 --> 00:06:48.389 treatment, like medication, therapy, and even 00:06:48.389 --> 00:06:51.889 inpatient treatment if the case is severe enough. 00:06:52.410 --> 00:06:54.889 Specialists like those from BetterHelp are available 00:06:54.889 --> 00:06:58.250 to determine if whatever is causing your issue 00:06:58.250 --> 00:07:02.110 are from depression or specific trauma events. 00:07:02.269 --> 00:07:04.610 They can help formulate coping plans so that 00:07:04.610 --> 00:07:08.519 you don't feel this way. However, keep this in 00:07:08.519 --> 00:07:11.740 mind. While they may be able to help you figure 00:07:11.740 --> 00:07:15.180 out what the cause is, it's still up to you to 00:07:15.180 --> 00:07:19.839 find a way to reduce it. They can give you whatever 00:07:19.839 --> 00:07:23.500 medicines and such that they want, but if you're 00:07:23.500 --> 00:07:27.160 not able to deal with this on your own, and it's 00:07:27.160 --> 00:07:31.600 something that is relative to you, then you won't 00:07:31.600 --> 00:07:34.500 be able to stop that weird feeling of whether 00:07:34.500 --> 00:07:37.879 or not you're worthy. One of the most common 00:07:37.879 --> 00:07:41.279 questions I get in regards to building self -confidence 00:07:41.279 --> 00:07:44.279 is how do I stop feeling this way? The answer 00:07:44.279 --> 00:07:48.600 is really simply, it's shockingly simple. I mean, 00:07:48.639 --> 00:07:50.779 if you Google the question, you'll find hundreds 00:07:50.779 --> 00:07:56.439 of pages with dozens of different suggestions. 00:07:57.439 --> 00:08:00.160 There's really one main thing you need to do 00:08:00.160 --> 00:08:04.019 to feel valuable and feel a sense of worth. Doesn't 00:08:04.019 --> 00:08:07.300 even matter what else you do. If you don't take 00:08:07.300 --> 00:08:09.779 this one step, you will always feel completely 00:08:09.779 --> 00:08:12.800 worthless. Yes, one decision you make is going 00:08:12.800 --> 00:08:18.180 to be more important than all the others. And 00:08:18.180 --> 00:08:21.300 that decision is this. Decide to feel worthwhile. 00:08:21.939 --> 00:08:24.660 Make the decision that you have value. Do it 00:08:24.660 --> 00:08:27.259 right now. Try it out. You know, just say it 00:08:27.259 --> 00:08:30.939 with me. I am worthy. I'm worthy. You know. Or 00:08:30.939 --> 00:08:33.259 if it resonates more with you, choose, I have 00:08:33.259 --> 00:08:37.620 value or I'm important. You see how empowering 00:08:37.620 --> 00:08:43.139 this one little sentence is? There's no working 00:08:43.139 --> 00:08:45.620 through things or letting things go at a precise 00:08:45.620 --> 00:08:48.000 moment. It's as simple as the decision you make. 00:08:48.419 --> 00:08:52.220 I'm worthy. Don't let the simpleness of this 00:08:52.220 --> 00:08:54.340 advice make you doubt the power of it. I'm serious. 00:08:54.740 --> 00:08:57.299 There's a lot of things in life that can basically 00:08:57.299 --> 00:09:00.460 cause... People to think and feel that they're 00:09:00.460 --> 00:09:04.259 not worthy. You know. And. I can understand. 00:09:05.139 --> 00:09:10.259 I understand why you feel that way. But. If you 00:09:10.259 --> 00:09:14.179 don't. Do something about it now. To change how 00:09:14.179 --> 00:09:18.179 you feel. Then you'll never do anything about 00:09:18.179 --> 00:09:20.759 it. Ever. And you'll continue to feel this way 00:09:20.759 --> 00:09:24.799 no matter what. You know. The key piece here. 00:09:25.460 --> 00:09:30.460 To understand. Is not. is that this is not an 00:09:30.460 --> 00:09:33.440 affirmation or a mantra that you're trying to 00:09:33.440 --> 00:09:35.740 tell yourself blankly throughout the day, knowing 00:09:35.740 --> 00:09:38.659 deep down inside you don't believe it. You could 00:09:38.659 --> 00:09:40.580 tell yourself, I'm going to the store, I'm going 00:09:40.580 --> 00:09:43.220 to the store all day, knowing deep inside you're 00:09:43.220 --> 00:09:45.179 not even going to try to get off your butt and 00:09:45.179 --> 00:09:48.360 go to the store until next week. Saying it over 00:09:48.360 --> 00:09:51.259 and over to yourself won't make you go to the 00:09:51.259 --> 00:09:53.980 store. You won't go to the store until you decide 00:09:53.980 --> 00:09:57.100 to go to the store. Once you make that decision, 00:09:57.340 --> 00:09:59.320 then you put your shoes on, then your jacket, 00:09:59.360 --> 00:10:01.720 look for your keys, and go to the store. You've 00:10:01.720 --> 00:10:03.940 made the decision to do it. That's the difference 00:10:03.940 --> 00:10:05.879 between an affirmation and making a decision. 00:10:08.379 --> 00:10:11.299 Think about all the other things you've achieved 00:10:11.299 --> 00:10:13.159 in your life and what one of the things that 00:10:13.159 --> 00:10:15.419 you had done in order to move ahead was your 00:10:15.419 --> 00:10:18.460 goal. You had to make a decision to do it. Without 00:10:18.460 --> 00:10:20.379 making the decision, it always remains a wish 00:10:20.379 --> 00:10:30.389 or something to do in the future. Alright, last 00:10:30.389 --> 00:10:35.409 thing to leave you with. Worthlessness. I'm going 00:10:35.409 --> 00:10:38.169 to leave you with three things. Three truths 00:10:38.169 --> 00:10:40.789 to remember when you're feeling worthless. Everyone 00:10:40.789 --> 00:10:45.210 battles this, even me. I have limited use of 00:10:45.210 --> 00:10:47.330 my left hand from a car wreck when I was younger 00:10:47.330 --> 00:10:49.809 due to a head injury. There is a lot of stuff 00:10:49.809 --> 00:10:52.450 I can't do. I can't join the military. I can't 00:10:52.450 --> 00:10:55.789 play contact sports. But you know what? I can 00:10:55.789 --> 00:10:57.909 still cook. I can still read. I can still go 00:10:57.909 --> 00:11:00.379 to school. I can still use the computer. So while 00:11:00.379 --> 00:11:02.360 I may not be able to be physical like a lot of 00:11:02.360 --> 00:11:04.360 other people, I still have my advantages and 00:11:04.360 --> 00:11:06.820 such as well. And one of the things that helped 00:11:06.820 --> 00:11:10.000 me move forward is the first thing is this. Remember, 00:11:10.139 --> 00:11:12.159 you are valuable for who you are, not what you 00:11:12.159 --> 00:11:15.519 do. You were created exclusively by God and for 00:11:15.519 --> 00:11:19.980 God. More or less, depending on what you believe, 00:11:20.220 --> 00:11:23.639 you know, that can go any kind of way. But this 00:11:23.639 --> 00:11:25.340 is what I believe. I'm just giving my opinion 00:11:25.340 --> 00:11:27.399 here. But these three things can help you too 00:11:27.399 --> 00:11:29.960 because they help me. And believe that you are 00:11:29.960 --> 00:11:33.120 valuable. There were no flaws in your design. 00:11:33.220 --> 00:11:35.019 There's no errors in your construction. You are 00:11:35.019 --> 00:11:37.200 handmade, custom designed, and fully loaded. 00:11:37.519 --> 00:11:41.039 And because of that, you have an immeasurable 00:11:41.039 --> 00:11:43.559 amount of worth. No human life could ever be 00:11:43.559 --> 00:11:48.259 valued in money. Two, you have gifts. Embrace 00:11:48.259 --> 00:11:50.379 them. Or you have weaknesses. There are gifts 00:11:50.379 --> 00:11:52.899 to replace those weaknesses. I may not be able 00:11:52.899 --> 00:11:55.620 to use my left hand efficiently. But I have a 00:11:55.620 --> 00:11:58.519 high response time. I'm very active and super 00:11:58.519 --> 00:12:00.799 adaptable to my situations and the people around 00:12:00.799 --> 00:12:03.460 me. It makes it so easy to go to a job and get 00:12:03.460 --> 00:12:05.179 along with the people there and even make friends. 00:12:05.919 --> 00:12:08.860 Okay? It's not hard. Those gifts were given to 00:12:08.860 --> 00:12:10.820 me in replacement for the other things that I 00:12:10.820 --> 00:12:13.600 can't do. So while I may be six foot tall, that 00:12:13.600 --> 00:12:15.360 doesn't mean I can play sports and do like everyone 00:12:15.360 --> 00:12:18.389 else can. Okay, every person has gifts or strengths. 00:12:18.490 --> 00:12:20.809 If you don't know yours, I'd encourage you to 00:12:20.809 --> 00:12:22.889 ask five family members and friends this question. 00:12:23.029 --> 00:12:25.629 And in one or two words, basically ask this. 00:12:25.730 --> 00:12:28.210 In one or two words, what do you think is my 00:12:28.210 --> 00:12:30.549 single greatest strength? Okay, that's the question. 00:12:30.809 --> 00:12:32.629 They'll all probably give you similar answers. 00:12:33.029 --> 00:12:35.330 Those answers identifying your area of giftness 00:12:35.330 --> 00:12:37.629 will help you understand the truth that you are 00:12:37.629 --> 00:12:40.169 valuable and you have a lot to offer the family 00:12:40.169 --> 00:12:43.669 and, you know, your world. Okay, the family and 00:12:43.669 --> 00:12:45.970 the world. Sorry. I said that, and I thought 00:12:45.970 --> 00:12:48.590 about it, and just, I'm having one of those days, 00:12:48.629 --> 00:12:51.330 hey, it's 5 a .m., okay, it's around 5 a .m., 00:12:51.330 --> 00:12:54.309 three, you weren't meant to do this alone, okay, 00:12:54.490 --> 00:12:57.289 you, if you're constantly putting on a front 00:12:57.289 --> 00:12:59.129 that you have it all together, and other people 00:12:59.129 --> 00:13:01.029 will start to believe that you really do have 00:13:01.029 --> 00:13:05.370 it together, so I challenge you to be honest 00:13:05.370 --> 00:13:07.909 with trusted friends and family, share your struggles 00:13:07.909 --> 00:13:10.129 with them, you know, let them help you carry 00:13:10.129 --> 00:13:12.190 your burdens and encourage you, because the truth 00:13:12.190 --> 00:13:16.450 is, you're never How do I put this? The truth 00:13:16.450 --> 00:13:19.090 is you were never meant to do this alone. You're 00:13:19.090 --> 00:13:24.070 never on your own, okay? We all struggle with 00:13:24.070 --> 00:13:25.970 the feeling of worthlessness at one point in 00:13:25.970 --> 00:13:28.529 our life or another. Instead of staying trapped 00:13:28.529 --> 00:13:31.230 in the mindset of thinking that you have nothing 00:13:31.230 --> 00:13:33.929 to offer, you need to remind yourself of those 00:13:33.929 --> 00:13:36.409 three important truths, okay? If you feel that 00:13:36.409 --> 00:13:38.889 you're in a season of struggle right now or if 00:13:38.889 --> 00:13:41.889 you'd like to encourage someone who is, you know, 00:13:41.889 --> 00:13:45.139 feel free. You know, I'm here. I'm always open 00:13:45.139 --> 00:13:47.620 to suggestions. Just hit me up on my Facebook, 00:13:47.879 --> 00:13:54.679 my Twitter, or anchor here, or even email me 00:13:54.679 --> 00:13:57.720 if you have it, okay? On Facebook, my ID name 00:13:57.720 --> 00:14:01.139 is Neogentrix. Literally search that, and you 00:14:01.139 --> 00:14:05.100 will find me. Trust me. All right? That's all 00:14:05.100 --> 00:14:08.299 I have on this topic for today. I will hit... 00:14:08.600 --> 00:14:10.799 You guys up later with a whole new topic and 00:14:10.799 --> 00:14:12.159 we'll continue our series on morals.