WEBVTT 00:00:41.390 --> 00:00:43.409 Welcome back to Thoughts of People U, Food for 00:00:43.409 --> 00:00:48.609 Thought by Neogentrics. It is 1am, here where 00:00:48.609 --> 00:00:51.130 I'm at, and we're going to pick up where we left 00:00:51.130 --> 00:00:53.210 off with the topic lesson I was going to cover. 00:00:53.250 --> 00:00:55.310 We're going to cover emotional intelligence today, 00:00:55.390 --> 00:01:00.829 based off of the whole understanding of understanding 00:01:00.829 --> 00:01:08.370 others. Many of us are aware of IQ, which is 00:01:08.370 --> 00:01:12.599 the intelligence quotient. It's designed to measure 00:01:12.599 --> 00:01:17.140 intellectual intelligence. It gives a score from 00:01:17.140 --> 00:01:20.079 a series of tests. Higher IQs indicate better 00:01:20.079 --> 00:01:22.579 cognitive abilities and the ability to learn 00:01:22.579 --> 00:01:27.280 and understand even at higher rates. People with 00:01:27.280 --> 00:01:29.620 higher IQs are more likely to do well academically 00:01:29.620 --> 00:01:32.079 without exerting the same amount of mental effort 00:01:32.079 --> 00:01:37.480 as those with lower IQ scores. A logical assumption... 00:01:38.060 --> 00:01:40.599 Therefore, it's that people with higher IQs will 00:01:40.599 --> 00:01:42.959 be more successful at work and throughout life. 00:01:43.659 --> 00:01:46.500 This assumption has been proven incorrect, however. 00:01:46.760 --> 00:01:49.459 There is more to success than just simply being 00:01:49.459 --> 00:01:54.120 clever. Emotional intelligence, or EI if you 00:01:54.120 --> 00:01:57.260 will, sometimes called EQ, or the emotional quotient, 00:01:57.400 --> 00:02:02.459 is a more modern concept and was only fully developed 00:02:02.459 --> 00:02:06.200 in the mid -1900s by the very same Daniel Goleman. 00:02:07.209 --> 00:02:09.949 Among others, of course. I gotta give props and 00:02:09.949 --> 00:02:12.710 credit where it's due. Emotional intelligence, 00:02:12.789 --> 00:02:15.909 by definition, is the measure of an individual's 00:02:15.909 --> 00:02:18.370 ability to recognize and manage their emotions, 00:02:18.629 --> 00:02:22.050 and the emotions of other people, both individually 00:02:22.050 --> 00:02:27.509 and in groups. Okay? There are benefits of higher 00:02:27.509 --> 00:02:32.870 emotional intelligence. Two of them are... People 00:02:32.870 --> 00:02:34.909 with higher emotional intelligence find it easier 00:02:34.909 --> 00:02:37.490 to form and maintain interpersonal relationships 00:02:37.490 --> 00:02:41.750 and to fit in, as they say, particular situations. 00:02:43.430 --> 00:02:45.610 People with higher emotional intelligence are 00:02:45.610 --> 00:02:49.210 also better at understanding their own psychological 00:02:49.210 --> 00:02:54.389 state, which can be basically included in managing 00:02:54.389 --> 00:02:57.110 stress effectively and being less likely to suffer 00:02:57.110 --> 00:03:02.710 from depression. There is no... correlation between 00:03:02.710 --> 00:03:08.569 IQ and EI scores. In other words, academic aptitude 00:03:08.569 --> 00:03:11.710 or IQ has no connection with how people understand 00:03:11.710 --> 00:03:14.409 and deal with their emotions and the emotions 00:03:14.409 --> 00:03:19.050 of others. In other words, the EI. This makes 00:03:19.050 --> 00:03:22.590 perfect sense. We've all met very clever people 00:03:22.590 --> 00:03:26.189 who nonetheless have no idea about how to deal 00:03:26.189 --> 00:03:28.789 with people and the reverse. Some people have 00:03:28.789 --> 00:03:31.319 high IQs and low emotional intelligence. and 00:03:31.319 --> 00:03:34.419 vice versa. While some people score very highly 00:03:34.419 --> 00:03:48.020 on both and some do not. IQ and emotional intelligence 00:03:48.020 --> 00:03:51.219 attempt to measure different forms of human intelligence, 00:03:51.439 --> 00:03:55.280 along with personality. These measures make up 00:03:55.280 --> 00:04:01.680 an individual's psyche. Emotional intelligence 00:04:01.680 --> 00:04:05.199 is the one part of the human psyche that we can 00:04:05.199 --> 00:04:07.300 develop and improve by learning and practicing 00:04:07.300 --> 00:04:10.500 new skills. You can learn more about these skills 00:04:10.500 --> 00:04:14.560 from many pages in different books from different 00:04:14.560 --> 00:04:19.199 people, especially Daniel Goldman's book. IQ 00:04:19.199 --> 00:04:21.860 and personality are more static measures and 00:04:21.860 --> 00:04:24.939 likely to stay reasonably constant throughout 00:04:24.939 --> 00:04:27.910 life, although... You can develop your ability 00:04:27.910 --> 00:04:31.389 to complete IQ tests very successfully, you know, 00:04:31.410 --> 00:04:34.470 and show that you have a very high IQ just in 00:04:34.470 --> 00:04:41.189 a different means, okay? You can find different 00:04:41.189 --> 00:04:44.029 tests to help you measure your IQ, your emotional 00:04:44.029 --> 00:04:46.209 intelligence level, and personality online in 00:04:46.209 --> 00:04:48.850 the books, like I mentioned earlier. EI tests 00:04:48.850 --> 00:04:51.230 require that the person taking the test answers 00:04:51.230 --> 00:04:54.329 questions honestly. It is therefore a lot easier 00:04:54.329 --> 00:04:57.800 to cheat. an EI test than it is on an IQ test, 00:04:58.040 --> 00:05:00.279 whereas your IQ will be made known eventually. 00:05:03.259 --> 00:05:06.779 Ultimately, emotional intelligence can only be 00:05:06.779 --> 00:05:09.120 measured by how an individual progresses through 00:05:09.120 --> 00:05:12.300 life, developing meaningful relationships with 00:05:12.300 --> 00:05:14.639 others, their personal skills and understanding, 00:05:15.079 --> 00:05:18.019 their ability to manage their own emotions, and 00:05:18.019 --> 00:05:25.379 their personal skills. Elements of emotional 00:05:25.379 --> 00:05:29.000 intelligence is one of the main things here that 00:05:29.000 --> 00:05:30.680 I want to go ahead and cover as well, specifically 00:05:30.680 --> 00:05:33.879 in this area. As Daniel Goleman divided emotional 00:05:33.879 --> 00:05:36.560 intelligence into personal and social competencies, 00:05:36.860 --> 00:05:39.860 which broadly split between personal and interpersonal 00:05:39.860 --> 00:05:43.860 skills on the skills that you need as essential 00:05:43.860 --> 00:05:46.879 skills, within each of these sections are a range 00:05:46.879 --> 00:05:49.300 of skills which are elements of emotional intelligence. 00:05:52.779 --> 00:05:54.699 I will cover the difference between the two, 00:05:54.879 --> 00:05:59.819 which ones are under what. And while some of 00:05:59.819 --> 00:06:02.480 the topics may sound familiar, as something I've 00:06:02.480 --> 00:06:05.240 covered before, some I may not have gotten to 00:06:05.240 --> 00:06:07.339 yet, but don't worry, I will cover them in detail 00:06:07.339 --> 00:06:22.899 at a later date. Personal skills or competence. 00:06:23.279 --> 00:06:26.560 How we manage ourselves. One of the main ways 00:06:26.560 --> 00:06:30.100 is self -awareness. Under this category, we can 00:06:30.100 --> 00:06:34.060 align emotional awareness, accurate self -assessing, 00:06:34.100 --> 00:06:38.000 and even self -confidence. The next thing would 00:06:38.000 --> 00:06:40.920 be considered self -regulation, which falls under 00:06:40.920 --> 00:06:43.459 the categories of self -control, trustworthiness, 00:06:43.740 --> 00:06:47.560 conscientiousness, adaptability, and innovation. 00:06:48.540 --> 00:06:52.160 And finally for this category, motivation, which 00:06:52.160 --> 00:06:54.699 has the topics of achievement drive, which is 00:06:54.699 --> 00:06:57.319 the ability to keep going despite that, commitment, 00:06:57.660 --> 00:07:02.899 initiative, and optimism. But these are personal 00:07:02.899 --> 00:07:07.100 skills for confidence. However, social skills 00:07:07.100 --> 00:07:09.939 fall into a different category. Those are how 00:07:09.939 --> 00:07:12.819 we handle relationships with others. One of the 00:07:12.819 --> 00:07:14.759 main things being empathy, as I said before, 00:07:15.000 --> 00:07:18.759 in understanding others, developing others, service 00:07:18.759 --> 00:07:22.139 orientations. Leveraging diversity and political 00:07:22.139 --> 00:07:27.180 awareness. Also in the same category, obviously, 00:07:27.519 --> 00:07:30.220 would be social skills. Following the category 00:07:30.220 --> 00:07:33.660 of influence, communication, conflict management, 00:07:33.959 --> 00:07:36.740 leadership, change catalysts, building bonds, 00:07:37.139 --> 00:07:39.680 collaboration or cooperation with others, or 00:07:39.680 --> 00:07:46.819 even team capabilities. Okay? Personal skills 00:07:46.819 --> 00:07:49.980 and competencies. There are three areas of personal 00:07:49.980 --> 00:07:52.040 skill and competencies in emotional intelligence, 00:07:52.120 --> 00:07:54.259 and like I mentioned, the personal is self -awareness. 00:07:54.879 --> 00:07:57.779 In self -awareness, you have emotional awareness, 00:07:57.939 --> 00:08:00.980 accurate self -assessment, and self -confidence. 00:08:01.220 --> 00:08:04.100 Self -awareness is the skill of being aware and 00:08:04.100 --> 00:08:06.399 understanding your emotions as they occur and 00:08:06.399 --> 00:08:09.740 as they evolve. It is wrong to think of emotions 00:08:09.740 --> 00:08:12.259 as either positive or negative. Instead, you 00:08:12.259 --> 00:08:14.439 should think of them as appropriate or inappropriate. 00:08:15.199 --> 00:08:18.300 For example, Anger is usually associated with 00:08:18.300 --> 00:08:20.839 being a negative emotion. However, it can be 00:08:20.839 --> 00:08:23.040 completely reasonable and appropriate emotion 00:08:23.040 --> 00:08:27.639 in certain situations or circumstances. Emotional 00:08:27.639 --> 00:08:29.720 intelligence allows us to recognize our anger 00:08:29.720 --> 00:08:32.120 and understand why this emotion even occurs. 00:08:33.059 --> 00:08:35.500 Effective self -assessment of feelings and emotions 00:08:35.500 --> 00:08:37.759 will help to improve your confidence and even 00:08:37.759 --> 00:08:42.980 your self -esteem. Self -regulation, or self 00:08:42.980 --> 00:08:46.720 -management, includes the self -control, trustworthiness, 00:08:46.899 --> 00:08:50.240 conscientiousness, adaptability, and even innovation. 00:08:51.240 --> 00:08:53.620 Having learned to be aware of your emotions, 00:08:53.879 --> 00:08:56.600 the skill of self -regulation relates to managing 00:08:56.600 --> 00:08:59.899 them inappropriately and proportionately. Skill 00:08:59.899 --> 00:09:02.440 management skills relate to the emotions you 00:09:02.440 --> 00:09:05.000 are feeling at any given time or in any given 00:09:05.000 --> 00:09:09.039 situation or circumstance, and how well you manage 00:09:09.039 --> 00:09:16.899 them. what you do with them, whether you behave 00:09:16.899 --> 00:09:19.379 in a way which is recognized as good or virtuous 00:09:19.379 --> 00:09:24.639 or not, which leaves only motivation left for 00:09:24.639 --> 00:09:27.539 this section. Motivation, the final personal 00:09:27.539 --> 00:09:30.259 skill aspect of emotional intelligence, is motivation. 00:09:31.700 --> 00:09:35.480 Self -motivation includes our personal drive 00:09:35.480 --> 00:09:38.299 to improve and achieve, commitment to our goals, 00:09:38.419 --> 00:09:42.480 initiative, or readiness to act. on any opportunity 00:09:42.480 --> 00:09:47.159 and optimism and resilience as well. Self -motivation 00:09:47.159 --> 00:09:49.360 and personal time management are key skills in 00:09:49.360 --> 00:09:52.720 this area. So do not make unreasonable demands 00:09:52.720 --> 00:09:54.980 on yourself. Learn to be assertive rather than 00:09:54.980 --> 00:09:58.480 just saying yes to the demands of others. And 00:09:58.480 --> 00:10:00.740 like I mentioned before, I will cover some of 00:10:00.740 --> 00:10:02.700 these other topics in a little more detail such 00:10:02.700 --> 00:10:06.000 as self -regulation, self -motivation, time management, 00:10:06.080 --> 00:10:10.240 or even the very well -known self -awareness 00:10:10.240 --> 00:10:15.220 and confidence. We'll take a short break, and 00:10:15.220 --> 00:10:16.500 I'll come back with our social interpersonal 00:10:16.500 --> 00:10:49.809 skills and competencies. So next is social or 00:10:49.809 --> 00:10:53.549 interpersonal skills or competencies. Interpersonal 00:10:53.549 --> 00:10:55.529 skills are the skills we use to interact with 00:10:55.529 --> 00:10:58.470 other people. They enable us to communicate appropriately 00:10:58.470 --> 00:11:00.690 and build stronger, more meaningful relationships. 00:11:01.929 --> 00:11:04.250 Emotional intelligence includes how we understand 00:11:04.250 --> 00:11:07.269 others and their emotions, and our actions and 00:11:07.269 --> 00:11:10.490 behaviors towards them. There are two key aspects, 00:11:10.789 --> 00:11:14.750 like I mentioned before, empathy. Empathy is 00:11:14.750 --> 00:11:17.289 an awareness of the needs and feelings of others, 00:11:17.450 --> 00:11:21.269 both individually and in groups, and being able 00:11:21.269 --> 00:11:22.809 to see things from the point of view of others. 00:11:23.090 --> 00:11:25.570 Empathy helps us to develop a stronger understanding 00:11:25.570 --> 00:11:28.769 of other people's situations. It includes understanding 00:11:28.769 --> 00:11:31.070 others, developing others, helping a service 00:11:31.070 --> 00:11:33.649 orientation, leveraging diversity and political 00:11:33.649 --> 00:11:37.649 awareness. Empathy can often be difficult to 00:11:37.649 --> 00:11:40.720 achieve. Learn to listen effectively to both 00:11:40.720 --> 00:11:42.720 the verbal and non -verbal messages of others. 00:11:43.120 --> 00:11:46.120 Include body movements, gestures, physical signs 00:11:46.120 --> 00:11:49.240 of emotion. Use questions to find out more about 00:11:49.240 --> 00:11:51.279 other people and what they are feeling and feedback 00:11:51.279 --> 00:11:53.580 to clarify that you have correctly understood 00:11:53.580 --> 00:11:56.639 their feelings. Acknowledge and respect the feelings 00:11:56.639 --> 00:11:59.019 of others even if you disagree and avoid making 00:11:59.019 --> 00:12:01.659 comments or statements that are judgmental, belittling, 00:12:01.759 --> 00:12:05.360 rejecting, or even undermining. As this is the 00:12:05.360 --> 00:12:08.529 whole point of empathy. The second aspect is 00:12:08.529 --> 00:12:11.730 social skills. Social skills encompasses a wide 00:12:11.730 --> 00:12:13.929 range of relationship and interpersonal skills. 00:12:14.490 --> 00:12:17.909 These range from leadership through to influencing 00:12:17.909 --> 00:12:20.690 and persuading and managing conflict, as well 00:12:20.690 --> 00:12:23.830 as working in a team. The term social skills 00:12:23.830 --> 00:12:26.090 covers a wide variety of skills and competencies, 00:12:26.370 --> 00:12:28.950 many of which are rooted in self -esteem and 00:12:28.950 --> 00:12:32.309 personal confidence. By developing your social 00:12:32.309 --> 00:12:35.629 skills, being easy to talk to, being a good listener, 00:12:36.620 --> 00:12:39.299 sharing and trustworthy, you also become more 00:12:39.299 --> 00:12:41.960 charismatic and attractive to others. This tends 00:12:41.960 --> 00:12:44.159 to improve self -esteem and confidence, which 00:12:44.159 --> 00:12:46.399 makes it easier for positive personal dialogue, 00:12:46.559 --> 00:12:48.820 and a greater understanding and acceptance of 00:12:48.820 --> 00:12:58.120 your own emotions. In short, working on your 00:12:58.120 --> 00:13:01.840 emotional intelligence could well be the most 00:13:01.840 --> 00:13:03.700 important aspect of your personal development. 00:13:04.360 --> 00:13:06.820 Research has shown that people with higher levels 00:13:06.820 --> 00:13:09.899 of BI, or emotional intelligence, enjoy more 00:13:09.899 --> 00:13:13.679 satisfying and successful careers and relationships. 00:13:14.299 --> 00:13:16.580 If you think about ways to enhance your emotional 00:13:16.580 --> 00:13:18.879 intelligence, you are likely to become more charismatic, 00:13:19.200 --> 00:13:22.559 including being interesting and attractive to 00:13:22.559 --> 00:13:25.620 others, and you will also give your self -esteem 00:13:25.620 --> 00:13:31.100 a huge, much -needed boost if it needs it. So, 00:13:33.419 --> 00:13:37.960 With that, it brings this topic of emotional 00:13:37.960 --> 00:13:44.259 intelligence to a slightly abrupt end. Next time, 00:13:44.299 --> 00:13:46.580 I will be talking a little bit more about emotions 00:13:46.580 --> 00:13:50.480 and your emotional state. Until then, thank you 00:13:50.480 --> 00:13:53.080 for listening. This is Foo for Thought Thoughts, 00:13:53.080 --> 00:13:56.320 if it were you, by Neo Geo Tricks. Enjoy the 00:13:56.320 --> 00:13:56.960 rest of your day.