Hey everybody, good morning. Now, it is 3 .30
in the morning, and in the last short podcast
that I did, I covered a very brief, and I mean
brief, overview of pregnancy and babies, I do
believe. And I did say I was going to cover the
top 10 tips for parenting survival skills. Now,
keeping that in mind, there's a difference between
this and mindful parenting. I will definitely
go into that a little bit. Again, this is food
for thought. Thoughts If It Were You by Neogentrix.
Keep in mind, this is a gathering of everybody's
information. And with this being said, these
are just tips. You do not have to follow them.
But if you have a guideline, it's a good place
to start. Now, with that being said, one thing
I want to keep in mind here with this is that...
This is not my perspective. These are not my
ideas This is what I've been taught if not have
already read in books and otherwise and I've
filtered out most of the best From the worst
of good ideas using logical reasoning at least
To your for most people's dismay that So for
those who don't understand or can't tell the
difference I'm gonna just go ahead and say that
this is the best that I pulled out of most of
the information that it was given To me and I
found on my own and from what I've seen in other
people's lives, okay? This is not the same as
saying that I'm telling you to do this or other
people told me to do this, okay? This is their
personal opinion, some of them, but most of them
is actual studies that have been proven true,
okay? So we're gonna go ahead and move forward
with this with skill number one right now. All
right. Tip number one. Oh, before I give that,
let's go ahead and cover this, okay? Like I said
before, everything here is just to help you maintain
your sanity and calm in the face of potential
or actual child -induced chaos so that you don't
go insane or end up in the psych ward or lose
your baby to, well, I don't know, child protective
services, okay? First, number one, everything
is a phase and it will eventually pass. Yes,
at the time, each problem may feel like it is
lasting forever, but you will look back and wonder
why you were so worried about something so simple.
Usually after about three months later, when
you have moved on to the next phase, a problem
being apparent is challenging, but also rewarding.
Just try to keep calm and go with the flow, okay?
Most phases don't really last too long, and you
know you'll get over it eventually To your ways
the right way Other people will always for some
reason feel free to comment on your parenting
and share their opinions on The grounds that
all feedback is useful. This is good However,
you can never have too many friends to give you
their views The important thing to remember is
that eventually you have to do what feels right
for you You are the one who knows your child
best My parents are prime examples of this, as
no matter what other people told them about us,
me and my younger brothers, they did what they
knew was best for us because they knew us better
than anyone else did. So when other people said
we caused chaos and problems, parents knowing
us as the more peaceful type of people, because
me and my brothers were this way, we don't like
making a lot of noise, we don't like being bothered,
found it kind of odd, you know? This also means
that you can and should ignore everyone else
if you should ever so want to. Thank them for
their feedback if you like, but don't feel bad
about it because you didn't use it, okay? So
with that being said, you can listen to the rest
of this podcast or you can just disregard it.
This is all up to you. Remember, I'm just giving
you these tips. It's up to you to decide to use
them. Three, it doesn't matter what the books
or anyone else says. If a baby is hungry, he
or she is hungry. It doesn't even matter if he
or she only finished feeding five minutes ago.
Some days are like that, and you just have to
go with it. You may have to grit your teeth,
as yet another older relative tells you that
in their day, babies were fed every four hours
and no sooner. Which, in reality, doesn't sound
all that great. You will also learn that everyone
is an expert. and will feel able to give you
the benefit of their experience. This even applies,
or possibly especially applies, to older people
who have never even had children. Believe me,
this will happen. Right, well, let's move on
to number four. Sometimes good enough is all
you can offer. And that's fine. You know, there
are days when you will struggle to have the energy
to respond to your children. You know, whether
you have been awake half the night with a nil
child or working very hard or not feeling well
or just having an off day, some days you just
don't have the energy or patience to be, oh,
I don't know, super mom and super dad. On those
days, switch on the television, feed them fish
fingers, beans or... chips or something, or any
other easy meal of choice, and they'll be fine
and tomorrow is another day, okay? Um, Annabelle
Crabb, the author of The Wife Drought, said that
the obligation for working mothers is a very
precise one. The feeling that one ought to work
as if one did not have children while raising
one's child as if one did not have a job. And
I couldn't have worded it any better, to be honest.
Number five would be a problem shared is a problem
halved or at least improved Now the reason I
picked this one is specifically for For that
very reason that if you're able to share your
problem other people it makes it a lot easier
to deal with Okay, a good social group can be
a lifeline as a parent. Okay, whether your friends
are nearby or a Mumsnet or other social media
something, you know, this is especially important
if you are at home on your own with young children
and do not have families to support a family
supporting hand, you know, and keeping in mind,
everyone has bad days and everyone needs support
sometimes. So, you know, don't be afraid to share
how bad your day was and, or has been. Not only
will it make everyone else feel better, but it
may encourage others to speak out about their
struggles with parenting too. And that in turn
will also help you deal with problems as you
come across them. And with that being said, Personal
privacy is a thing of the past. It's not so much
that while you have small children, you will
never be able to go to the toilet on your own,
although this is true. It is more that you will
have conversations with other adults about things
that you would, before children, never have dreamed
of even mentioning in company. 7. You don't see
16 -year -olds wearing nappies. or having their
food cut up for them. If they do, Lord help them.
Unless they're disabled, then God bless their
soul. It may seem as though your child is taking
longer than any of their peers to potty train,
eat solid food, learn to read, what have you,
but children do things in their own time. He
or she will almost certainly catch up eventually.
No need to label them special needs. Warning,
though. If you're worried that there may be more
serious underlying problems, though, you know,
talk to the doctor or another healthcare professional
about it before acting, okay? Let's move on with
number eight. Every child is different, so don't
compare them to other people, okay? I don't know
if this is... ringing a bell to anybody or if
they've ever thought about this, but I definitely
have to make a point of it. You will know this
yourself already if you've had more than one
child, especially, but the temptation to compare
is almost overwhelming with your own children,
with your friend's children, and others at school.
Don't do it, okay? This is one of those few things
you can't ignore and choose not to do, okay?
Keeping up with the Joneses in that aspect. will
actually end up hurting your child, not helping
them. Okay? Every child is an individual and
has their own strengths and weaknesses. Concentrate
on developing a happy, rounded, well, okay, rounded
little person, and don't worry about what everyone
else is doing at that age. And when I say rounded,
I mean well -rounded being, not a well -rounded
belly. Okay? It's two different things. I'm just
going to go ahead and cover that right now. And
the reason I bring this up is because even though
I have two younger siblings, We are nothing alike.
If anything, we're not even opposites. In which
case, this makes it nearly impossible for us
to even be compared to other people because the
way we do things is completely... How do I put
it? Special. In layman's terms. It would take
too long to explain it in words. Number nine.
There's a reason behind all behavioral issues,
though it may take you a while to identify what
the heck it is. the issue may not may also not
be at all to do with the child concerned even
though it may seem that it may be that way at
first okay children often act as emotional barometers
for their family acting out tension sometimes
a behavioral issue is intractable because conscientiously
or subconsciously is easier for everyone if it
remains unaddressed sometimes you may need to
look hard at yourself and your family as a whole
and confront some difficult issues for for all
of you you know if you are to resolve one's child's
behavior in other words he can he or she could
be acting that way because of people in your
family people you hang around basically your
environment last but not least number 10 you
are the best parent for your child because you
are their parent do not lend your child to someone
else okay doesn't help you will never know anyone
any other love like the love you feel for your
children, okay? It's such a strong feeling that
it can almost be overwhelming. I'm sorry. Hold
the thought that whatever else happens, you are
the best possible parent for your child. No one
else can do it better than you. Reason is, you
birthed that child, okay? Only you will know
when something's wrong or when something needs
to be corrected. And with that, that brings an
end to this list. Next time, I will be covering
sleep, like I promised. And don't worry, I'll
come back to the parenting issues at a later
date, and I'll talk about what the difference
is between parenting boys and parenting girls.
Enjoy the rest of your day, and thank you for
listening. This is Neogentrics out.