WEBVTT

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Welcome back, internet frenzy. Welcome freaking

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back. I am so excited about tonight. We have

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a couple of very special guests on the pod with

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us tonight. This is like, it's iconic, you guys.

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Oh, I can't wait to introduce you guys. Tell

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them. Oh, yeah. My name is Ryan. Hi, I'm Ashlyn.

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Ashlyn. So I also a little boxer and how I know

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Ashlyn. So Ashlyn was actually my first, I don't

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know if it was my first year coaching. I think

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it was my second year coaching. Yeah, it was

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your first year. Was it my first year? First.

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first fresh year straight out of my father's

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volleyball and i was like i'm gonna kill all

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these little kids let's get it not literally

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and lucky ashlyn was able to be on my team anyway

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she was my libero and she started and she played

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the whole time and it was great i wasn't sure

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if you remember that i will never forget my first

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libero like liberos are very dear to my heart

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i was a libero so that's probably why i bet i

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love coaching liberos, especially when I just

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can really vibe with them. It's really cool,

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actually. Every year I've coached, I have had

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a libero that I've really loved. So I've been

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very blessed with liberos. Like so much. So anyways,

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I'm super excited you guys are here. This is

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like a crazy throwback. I feel old. Ashlyn's

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now married. First of all, you are super old.

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And second of all, yes, full circle moment. Full

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circle moment. Yeah, for reals though. It's crazy.

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So you said it was nine years. It's been nine

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years since I coached you. Was I off? No, but

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like, I've never been good at math, y 'all, but

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it's been nine years. You said you were 13. Yeah,

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I was. I just thought I said the math's totally

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wrong. So it's like, what's 13 plus nine? Everyone

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help me. 22. Oh, 22. Okay. So how old is she?

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22. Oh, okay. It has some full circle there.

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And guess what? Guess who turns 29 years old

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tomorrow. This is Mr. Whitney. This girl right

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here. This girl right here. There you go. Everyone

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leave your birthday wishes in the comments for

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us. That's right. I need all the love. I'm turning

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29. Last birthday in the 20s. I don't, y 'all

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is crazy. RIP honestly. Thank you, Joe. Yeah.

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Well, Joe's old. He's in his thirties. How are

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you? I'm 23. Oh, okay. It's actually just my

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birthday as well. Today? I was, what, two Fridays

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ago? Two weeks ago. Two Fridays ago, yeah. I

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literally, you said today's your birthday. Oh,

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no. I was like, oh. And we didn't get him a cake.

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Come on, guys. What are you guys doing? I literally

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was passed out. I'm like, you came to our podcast

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on your birthday. Committed. Yeah, I was like,

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you really love your wife. I will do this. Workdays

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are every year, okay? Hogcats, who knows? Oh,

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it's true. Workdays come and go. He thinks it's

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all right tomorrow. It's fine. Oh my gosh. Okay.

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Well, happy birthday. Happy 23rd birthday. Thank

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you. But we're here. It's all in my eyes, right?

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We're here. You're still here. You're still on

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Earth. Good for you. Survived this long. Who

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knows what the future holds, I guess, at this

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point. Oh my gosh. Can you imagine the things

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that are in store for us, y 'all? I'm scared,

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but also excited. So it's it's gonna be it's

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gonna be different for them. We think we have

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it bad For our generation because they're even

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younger than us. They're starting their lives.

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Oh money. I'm just in general like yeah, it's

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a money life Leslie money Just money Living by

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how some 50. I don't be honestly. I'm it's crazy.

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It's so depressing. Yeah, let's all just remember

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us Well, you know, if we do, if we do get depressed

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or anxious, I know a guy. That's so true. Oh,

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I love that. So, yeah, Ryan just told us that

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he works for a psychiatric clinic. Is that what

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it is? Yeah. So yeah, I'm a medical assistant

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there. Pretty cool. There you go. Helping people

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with depression and anxiety and other fun things.

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Our listeners will be lining up at the door.

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There you go. Let's plug it right here. Let's

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get it to line up the door. Oh my gosh. Because

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if we're spending too much time on Reddit, we

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probably got problems. Hey. Guilty. Hot girls

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read Reddit. That's all I know. So here's the

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real quiz question. Have you listened to the

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episode for this week yet? It was only posted

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yesterday. Oh, OK. I'll give you grace. And if

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you haven't, we forgive. We forgive. How easily

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are we forgive? It's good, because we have to

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spend a lot of time together tonight, so I'm

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not going to make it awkward right off the bat.

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The reason that I asked is because we're just

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going to do a quick recap before we jump into

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this episode. Recap the Mother's Day fiasco.

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It was Whose Mother is the A -hole? It's the

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title. That was it. So that's how we celebrated

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Mother's Day. We looked at all the crazy mom

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stories on Reddit. We have a story about the

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husband. who told his wife, I don't need to celebrate

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your Mother's Day because you're not my mom.

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Oh, I did watch that one. That's messed up. Real

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or fake? Real. I think it's real too. That sounds

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like something that could happen for sure. Very

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real, very douchey husband. Then there was the

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the OP posting about her soon -to -be mother

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-in -law calling her a R -word gold digger. R

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-word. Remember what that means? Why are you

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laughing so hard? Were you trying to figure out

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what R word meant? I thought that too when you

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break down the story as it - I thought it meant

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the other R word, I was like, what? I was like

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- Give context, because assuming he does - Yeah,

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I know exactly what it means. OP is very high

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-functioning autistic. So the person that posted

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the story is autistic. Her fiance's mom called

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her an R -word gold digger. That's a bad deal.

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It's so sad, but it's just that when someone

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says R -word, you're like, what? It's an R -word.

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You just don't get it. My mind did not got it.

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Oh, same. Same. It's at least three R words I

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could think of. You think that's a fake? Okay.

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I'll take it. I'll take it in stride. It's not.

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Hi, Nia. That's why I didn't say anything. Right?

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If I'm just quiet... I'll be... No, I knew it.

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That's what I was thinking. Well, I love it.

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I'll make you answer the next one. Oh, no. Take

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them, plan your own. Right? It's okay. See, he's

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already maffin' over here. He's already just

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crunching the numbers. He let me take the fall

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for it. Yeah, I was like, I've placed her and

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I have a better chance of getting her right in

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the house. He's like, what do you think? You're

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shootin'. All right, and the next one was the

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story about the mother -in -law who offered to

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come over and help clean the house for a mom

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that's only a week postpartum. And she shows

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up and she just wants to hold the brand new baby

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and let... this one week postpartum mom do all

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the cleaning. She's like, your house is a wreck.

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You should really get to cleaning. I'll take

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the baby. Then it comes to like lunchtime and

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she's like, and I'm getting hungry. Can you make

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me a sandwich? Yeah, that story really pissed

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me off. Yeah, that mother -in -law was the worst.

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Actually not worse than the previous mother -in

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-law, now that I think about it. Oh, yeah, true.

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Sound real? Sound plausible? That one sounds

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like the fake one to me. I don't know. Getting

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the vibe. You had a coin flip. I was financing

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about one of the two. And you're just like, yeah,

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I mean, would they say the fake would be the

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last one? And this time we did. So that was a

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real story. That was real. Oh, wow. That's horrible.

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Do you imagine? She came over and was like, oh,

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I'll just hold the baby. And you can get to cleaning.

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And Oprah was like, what? Pardon me. I have no

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words. I would literally die. Like I would be

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in jail. Oh, yeah. Are you serious? Yes someone

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like on the one of the commenters was saying

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like Opie you stick up for yourself next and

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say no, I'm gonna sit with my baby I just gave

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birth but if you thought to clean you can mm

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-hmm and I'm like would I have the guts to do

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that? I don't know But I definitely would say

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oh, no, I'm not feeling great. I'm gonna stay

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sitting right, you know I don't know. Crazy.

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Your mom's too nice. Like, I can't even imagine

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her. She's like a saintly woman. I could not

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even... Dude, there's mother -in -laws out there

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that would... I could definitely see mother -in

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-laws seeing that. They're all over Reddit. Mm

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-hmm. Yeah, true. First place to look. Yeah.

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You wanna... You wanna find crappy people? Reddit.

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Reddit, man. That's where it's at. All right.

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You guys ready for the fake? This was a story

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about the woman that was not yet a mother. Remember?

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Do you remember? She's not a mom yet, but she

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was mad that her husband's Mother's Day gifts

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were not satisfactory. Like he wasn't putting

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enough effort into giving her gifts, but she's

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not a mom yet. I still feel like every woman

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should be so pregnant even if you're not a mom

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yet. You could be a dog mom, you could be an

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aunt, you could be like a friend that like helps

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with kids. So honestly, I like Okie and I agree.

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If she expressed she wanted lavender flowers.

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colored flowers, then she should have gotten

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them. So I'm going to let you in on a little

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secret. What? I'm OP. I wrote the story. It was

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fake. Did you? Did you? Yeah. Did you get her

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flowers on Mother's Day? I did. I did. Good job.

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I didn't think it was like, no, I did. I just,

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I've gotten the flowers. And they were lavender

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colored too. Were you OP? I have a story for

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you. Oh my gosh, that's crazy. That kid's so

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cute. The dog ran. So she was complaining that

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he didn't get her enough or that he wasn't thoughtful

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enough. He got her flowers and a card, but he

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was like, he was lazy about it. Like it was,

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he got her a bouquet from Safeway instead of

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the good stuff, et cetera, et cetera. That was

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the fake listeners. If you guessed that was the

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fake, I would be impressed, first of all. Yeah.

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good for you because it's not outrageous like

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that's not even far out to be like yeah he didn't

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put in enough effort whereas like your mother

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-in -law coming over and like thing like go clean

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while i hold your baby is like outrageous it's

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like that's insane yeah so yeah all the so there's

00:11:03.340 --> 00:11:06.039
always it's your new listening to the podcast

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one of four of our stories is fake and it's generated

00:11:08.940 --> 00:11:12.539
by chad gbt and our little brains so this whole

00:11:12.539 --> 00:11:16.059
episode is going to be so Good. We have some

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fire stories for you guys tonight. Like, fire.

00:11:18.600 --> 00:11:20.899
Only the best for you two. Oh, great. We had

00:11:20.899 --> 00:11:23.460
to bring the heat. We got a silver in this, literally.

00:11:23.460 --> 00:11:25.480
We had to bring the heat. We had to bring the

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heat. I was like, we got to bring the heat. I'm

00:11:27.299 --> 00:11:31.659
not, I'm 0 for 0 right now. Yeah, nowhere to

00:11:31.659 --> 00:11:35.620
go but up. You still can guess this week's episodes,

00:11:36.159 --> 00:11:39.620
which one's the fake. Take your better greens.

00:11:43.559 --> 00:11:47.000
Make sure you get your greens Go to better days

00:11:47.000 --> 00:11:49.840
comm use code internet frenzy 10 at checkout

00:11:49.840 --> 00:12:09.580
and make your life way better Cheers One click

00:12:09.580 --> 00:12:17.090
no pretending Let's go. So the theme for this

00:12:17.090 --> 00:12:24.509
week is secret lives revealed. Oh boy. It's gonna

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be fire. It's gonna be hard to tell the difference

00:12:27.950 --> 00:12:30.190
between what's real and fake, to be honest. Oh

00:12:30.190 --> 00:12:33.169
yeah, some crazy secret lives. I will just say

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there are certain categories wherein I go like

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hunting for stories. I just fall into the deepest

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rabbit holes. This was one of them. I was like

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looking at stories yesterday. during my lunch

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hour. There was a story that I found. I'm not

00:12:47.950 --> 00:12:50.110
going to share it because it was too long. But

00:12:50.110 --> 00:12:54.009
you can find things on Reddit. Jill found a story

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that was literally just the updates alone. It

00:12:57.629 --> 00:13:01.870
took him 30 minutes to read. And normally, there's

00:13:01.870 --> 00:13:03.610
been times where we have read really, really

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long stories before, but it takes like three

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hours. And we're like, we're not doing that.

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Yeah, we found the good ones. But anyway, the

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point is that, yeah. You could go for days finding

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all the times that people just are secretive,

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shady characters and they just live their lives

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that way until somebody finds out. I am so excited.

00:13:27.320 --> 00:13:28.799
Yeah, this is going to be great. It's going to

00:13:28.799 --> 00:13:31.120
be so good. Do you want to go first? No, you

00:13:31.120 --> 00:13:34.539
go first. OK, so I'm going to start us out. So

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this is from the subreddit confession. This was

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posted 13 days ago. I, 34M, house it for other

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people with the specific goal of going through

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their things. What? That's crazy. It's nosy.

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34M, so 34 -year -old dude. Someone's not getting

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paid, so I just say that by the way. Don't hold

00:13:58.659 --> 00:14:02.139
her, you're getting just... Yeah. He thought

00:14:02.139 --> 00:14:05.059
he was right. That's right. So I've been a house

00:14:05.059 --> 00:14:07.460
sitter dog watcher for a number of years. It's

00:14:07.460 --> 00:14:10.179
truly easy money. I'm excellent at what I do.

00:14:10.539 --> 00:14:12.159
Odds are your place will be cleaner than when

00:14:12.159 --> 00:14:14.679
you left for your vacation or work trip. I'll

00:14:14.679 --> 00:14:16.580
collect your mail and organize it by the day

00:14:16.580 --> 00:14:19.100
it was delivered, wash all the towels and bed

00:14:19.100 --> 00:14:21.440
sheets, never have guests over, et cetera, et

00:14:21.440 --> 00:14:24.360
cetera. However, unknown to you and every person

00:14:24.360 --> 00:14:27.159
who has let me house sit, I am going to go through

00:14:27.159 --> 00:14:32.019
your things, specifically your clothes. Mainly

00:14:32.019 --> 00:14:34.639
just your clothes. I'll open and go through every

00:14:34.639 --> 00:14:37.460
closet and open and go through all your drawers.

00:14:38.039 --> 00:14:40.460
Dresses, suits, bathing suits, sweaters, pants,

00:14:40.720 --> 00:14:43.740
skirts, underwear, scarves, jackets, hats. You

00:14:43.740 --> 00:14:45.960
own it. I'm going to take a look. If I really

00:14:45.960 --> 00:14:47.960
like something, if it really catches my eye or

00:14:47.960 --> 00:14:50.519
gets my heart going, I'll try it on. I'll stand

00:14:50.519 --> 00:14:52.379
in front of your mirror and see how it fits me.

00:14:52.700 --> 00:14:54.240
I'll wear it around the house and see how it

00:14:54.240 --> 00:14:57.019
feels, especially if you're married women. For

00:14:57.019 --> 00:14:59.580
some reason, you're things of particular I love

00:14:59.580 --> 00:15:02.100
to look through and wear. Yes, the thrill is

00:15:02.100 --> 00:15:03.980
doing something I'm not supposed to be doing.

00:15:04.460 --> 00:15:06.320
And the thrill of possibly getting caught in

00:15:06.320 --> 00:15:08.879
your sexiest outfit. But mainly, if you thought

00:15:08.879 --> 00:15:11.179
it was nice enough to buy and wear, I want to

00:15:11.179 --> 00:15:13.740
see why. When I'm done, I'll fold it back up

00:15:13.740 --> 00:15:16.159
or hang it exactly how I found it. You'll never

00:15:16.159 --> 00:15:18.419
know. How do I know? Because you've asked me

00:15:18.419 --> 00:15:22.370
to house it again and again and again. It started

00:15:22.370 --> 00:15:24.250
when I was back in high school. My friends would

00:15:24.250 --> 00:15:26.450
have a party when everyone was outside. I'd go

00:15:26.450 --> 00:15:28.529
upstairs and see what their mom had tucked away.

00:15:28.870 --> 00:15:31.169
Then I'd try it on to see how it looked, then

00:15:31.169 --> 00:15:34.269
fold it back and put away like nothing ever happened.

00:15:34.470 --> 00:15:36.090
Then I started house -sitting and found out I

00:15:36.090 --> 00:15:38.850
could have free rein and not have to sneak around.

00:15:38.990 --> 00:15:41.149
I'm sure this all sounds incredibly creepy and

00:15:41.149 --> 00:15:43.889
like a breach of trust. I'm not looking for advice,

00:15:43.889 --> 00:15:46.750
just wanted to get it off my chest. Looking back,

00:15:46.789 --> 00:15:51.169
it does feel wrong, so I regret it now. Like

00:15:51.169 --> 00:15:52.909
imagine you're like you like forgot something

00:15:52.909 --> 00:15:54.950
at home and he like you like come in and he's

00:15:54.950 --> 00:15:58.350
just like oh he's like how did that get there

00:15:58.350 --> 00:16:00.169
it's like that toby maguire beer he's like yes

00:16:00.169 --> 00:16:04.629
how did that get there I would literally have

00:16:04.629 --> 00:16:07.110
a panic attack if I walked in and saw my house

00:16:07.110 --> 00:16:11.090
sitter who's a male in my underwear in my bra

00:16:11.090 --> 00:16:15.029
in heels in front of my mirror could you imagine

00:16:15.179 --> 00:16:17.980
Like think Isaiah, he house sits for us all the

00:16:17.980 --> 00:16:20.179
time. You come back and he's just like in like

00:16:20.179 --> 00:16:22.100
one of your like slip things. How old is Isaiah

00:16:22.100 --> 00:16:28.919
again? Is he 30? So why post it to Reddit? Like

00:16:28.919 --> 00:16:32.480
what, what in the world? That was a, the subreddit

00:16:32.480 --> 00:16:35.379
was just confession. So it's like some people

00:16:35.379 --> 00:16:39.940
post just to clear the air. Yeah. To put it out

00:16:39.940 --> 00:16:42.879
there into the world. I have two things. The

00:16:42.879 --> 00:16:44.980
first one is like, some people have cameras in

00:16:44.980 --> 00:16:47.340
their house. I see like whether for their dog,

00:16:47.460 --> 00:16:49.179
whether for their baby or just like they have

00:16:49.179 --> 00:16:52.399
a camera system inside here. Like 20 bucks. Like

00:16:52.399 --> 00:16:54.980
a lot of them are so cheap. We have one for our

00:16:54.980 --> 00:16:58.659
dog. And it's like $18 is super easy. Like you

00:16:58.659 --> 00:17:00.879
can hear sound. Like even if it's in like a different

00:17:00.879 --> 00:17:02.759
room, they can hear them opening drawers. It's

00:17:02.759 --> 00:17:05.559
like, like they, you will get caught doing this

00:17:05.559 --> 00:17:08.910
eventually. And number two is that like Sometimes

00:17:08.910 --> 00:17:10.809
you're gonna wear the wife's gonna wear their

00:17:10.809 --> 00:17:12.509
clothes and stuff. Why does it smell like a man?

00:17:12.710 --> 00:17:15.230
That's like it's almost like someone else's cologne

00:17:15.230 --> 00:17:17.329
or something like that I don't know and then

00:17:17.329 --> 00:17:18.890
I guess a third thing too. I'll probably be seeing

00:17:18.890 --> 00:17:23.910
this guy at my work at some point, so You probably

00:17:23.910 --> 00:17:26.029
already is there you should ask do you post on

00:17:26.029 --> 00:17:31.730
reddit? Yeah, that's crazy you mentioned the

00:17:31.730 --> 00:17:33.869
first option was the cameras because literally

00:17:33.869 --> 00:17:36.640
the first comma is Dude, cameras are like $20.

00:17:36.900 --> 00:17:39.339
You're 100 % getting caught one of these days.

00:17:39.559 --> 00:17:41.779
That's literally worth it. Is this you? Is this

00:17:41.779 --> 00:17:45.059
Ryan? Are you Agador Spartacus? Dang it, we found

00:17:45.059 --> 00:17:50.359
your burner. It's my stupid life, actually. It's

00:17:50.359 --> 00:17:52.759
my confession, is it? We're addicted to common

00:17:52.759 --> 00:17:55.319
take -up. Yeah. Hey, well, there's worse addictions,

00:17:55.420 --> 00:17:59.299
so I'm okay with that one. Facts. I like the

00:17:59.299 --> 00:18:01.059
guy in this story. That was way worse. Yeah,

00:18:01.119 --> 00:18:03.960
this is terrifying. And like, just think about...

00:18:03.799 --> 00:18:06.140
Think about somebody that's in their early 30s

00:18:06.140 --> 00:18:09.500
that you know. Like, what if they're secretly

00:18:09.500 --> 00:18:12.119
a creep like that? This guy has to be single,

00:18:12.119 --> 00:18:15.420
right? Oh, yeah. I mean, yes, but no. Like, if

00:18:15.420 --> 00:18:17.339
you watch enough 2020, you see there's the guys

00:18:17.339 --> 00:18:19.799
that seem normal that are actually, like, not

00:18:19.799 --> 00:18:22.519
normal. That's true. There's like a lot of married

00:18:22.519 --> 00:18:24.460
men out there that are like serial killers and

00:18:24.460 --> 00:18:27.240
the wife had no idea. Or, dude, what about the

00:18:27.240 --> 00:18:29.900
one where, I'm so sorry, I'm blinging on her

00:18:29.900 --> 00:18:32.599
name, but... The dad kidnapped his own daughter

00:18:32.599 --> 00:18:35.539
right before she turned 18, had her in her basement,

00:18:35.960 --> 00:18:39.599
and he tortured her and had children with his

00:18:39.599 --> 00:18:42.480
daughter, and the mom never knew. She was right

00:18:42.480 --> 00:18:44.799
upstairs the entire time that her daughter got

00:18:44.799 --> 00:18:48.480
abducted. Did you nestle this? She did. Have

00:18:48.480 --> 00:18:51.440
I ever seen this? She escaped because she pretended

00:18:51.440 --> 00:18:53.680
that one of her kids was dead and rolled him

00:18:53.680 --> 00:18:59.079
up into a carpet and said, take him out. He never

00:18:59.079 --> 00:19:01.000
listened to her, but this one time he did. And

00:19:01.000 --> 00:19:03.480
she trained that little boy that when you get

00:19:03.480 --> 00:19:05.319
into the truck and he drives off, you're going

00:19:05.319 --> 00:19:07.559
to roll out of the carpet and jump out. This

00:19:07.559 --> 00:19:09.720
was a movie, right? Yeah. It's called Room or

00:19:09.720 --> 00:19:12.400
something. I don't know, but it's a true story.

00:19:12.579 --> 00:19:14.400
I haven't seen it, but I've seen that scene where

00:19:14.400 --> 00:19:16.880
she rolls him up into the carpet. Yes. And tells

00:19:16.880 --> 00:19:19.140
him to do that, but that's terrifying. That's

00:19:19.140 --> 00:19:21.380
the story based on a true story. That's the movie

00:19:21.380 --> 00:19:23.599
based on a true story. I know it's so sad, but

00:19:23.599 --> 00:19:25.579
anyways, it's like you never know. Yeah. You

00:19:25.579 --> 00:19:27.660
never know. I do get the vibe that this is a

00:19:27.660 --> 00:19:30.680
single male, though. I do get that. Giving me

00:19:30.680 --> 00:19:33.519
chicken man vibes from Toy Story 2. Chicken me

00:19:33.519 --> 00:19:35.140
a vibe. You know the guy that dresses up in the

00:19:35.140 --> 00:19:37.920
chicken? But he's giving me that, like, that's

00:19:37.920 --> 00:19:39.700
obsessed with these toys. He's like, yeah, I

00:19:39.700 --> 00:19:41.700
need to take him to Japan. Like, just super,

00:19:41.700 --> 00:19:44.539
like, creepy off the whole time. Oh, I see that.

00:19:44.759 --> 00:19:47.940
I so see that. That dude was really gross in

00:19:47.940 --> 00:19:53.339
the movie. If this person is dating someone,

00:19:53.420 --> 00:19:55.200
you know they're trying on their clothes too.

00:19:57.180 --> 00:20:01.759
I don't know what I would do. And that's why

00:20:01.759 --> 00:20:04.480
I never told you. Yeah, I was like, if I saw

00:20:04.480 --> 00:20:08.799
that, it would be over. Would it be over? Yeah,

00:20:08.900 --> 00:20:11.440
that's degree B. Yeah, it would have to be. It's

00:20:11.440 --> 00:20:13.500
not weird when like a girl tries on like a man.

00:20:13.500 --> 00:20:17.019
I was gonna say, that's called life. I wear his

00:20:17.019 --> 00:20:20.799
clothes all the time and I look hot. He... Looks

00:20:20.799 --> 00:20:23.700
hot in Michaels, too, but... You've never seen

00:20:23.700 --> 00:20:26.220
me. I have. Halloween. We don't have cameras.

00:20:27.140 --> 00:20:29.440
Actually, Ashlyn's shirt right here. No, it's

00:20:29.440 --> 00:20:32.440
like, we're in right now. Okay, well, that was

00:20:32.440 --> 00:20:35.779
my story. This one comes from True Off My Chest.

00:20:36.119 --> 00:20:39.180
Throw away for obvious reasons. I'm a C -level

00:20:39.180 --> 00:20:41.539
exec at a major company, live in a house most

00:20:41.539 --> 00:20:44.099
people would call a dream. From the outside everything

00:20:44.099 --> 00:20:46.740
looks fine, and in most ways it is, but I've

00:20:46.740 --> 00:20:48.660
been carrying this secret for most of my life

00:20:48.660 --> 00:20:50.240
and I honestly don't know what to do with it

00:20:50.240 --> 00:20:54.339
anymore. I shoplift, regularly. It started when

00:20:54.339 --> 00:20:57.220
I was a kid, we were extremely poor, sometimes

00:20:57.220 --> 00:21:00.519
no dinner poor. I stole because I had to. A box

00:21:00.519 --> 00:21:03.220
of pasta here, a loaf of bread there, at some

00:21:03.220 --> 00:21:05.539
point it becomes second nature. I got good at

00:21:05.539 --> 00:21:08.130
it and that made it easier to justify. But now,

00:21:08.289 --> 00:21:10.269
I don't need to steal anything. I haven't in

00:21:10.269 --> 00:21:12.130
decades. I could buy anything I take a hundred

00:21:12.130 --> 00:21:15.490
times over. And still I do it. It's become something

00:21:15.490 --> 00:21:18.349
I do without really thinking. Kind of a compulsion.

00:21:19.069 --> 00:21:21.349
If I see an easy opportunity, something small

00:21:21.349 --> 00:21:24.230
enough to go unnoticed, I take it. Carmelo bars,

00:21:24.609 --> 00:21:27.670
socks, a kitchen thermometer, a pair of sunglasses.

00:21:28.259 --> 00:21:30.420
Sometimes bigger things like cologne or tech

00:21:30.420 --> 00:21:32.920
accessories if I feel like it's low risk. It's

00:21:32.920 --> 00:21:35.539
not about thrill or rebellion I don't get a rush

00:21:35.539 --> 00:21:37.819
from it like I used to it's more like scratching

00:21:37.819 --> 00:21:40.680
an itch I can't seem to get rid of I tell myself

00:21:40.680 --> 00:21:43.779
I'll stop but I never do I'll go a few weeks

00:21:43.779 --> 00:21:45.759
and then find myself slipping something into

00:21:45.759 --> 00:21:47.880
my jacket pocket without even fully realizing

00:21:47.880 --> 00:21:51.220
I've decided to do it and afterward I feel disgusted

00:21:51.220 --> 00:21:54.359
embarrassed not because of what I took it's never

00:21:54.359 --> 00:21:56.619
about the item but because I don't know why I

00:21:56.619 --> 00:21:59.390
can't stop I have so much to lose. My wife would

00:21:59.390 --> 00:22:02.190
be devastated, my career would be over, and yet

00:22:02.190 --> 00:22:04.910
the behavior continues. I haven't told anyone,

00:22:05.130 --> 00:22:07.529
not a friend, not a therapist, not even my wife.

00:22:08.269 --> 00:22:10.349
I've thought about it a hundred times, but I

00:22:10.349 --> 00:22:12.410
can't bring myself to say it out loud. It sounds

00:22:12.410 --> 00:22:15.609
so pathetic and so small, like something a teenager

00:22:15.609 --> 00:22:18.589
does for attention. But for me, it's a real problem,

00:22:18.730 --> 00:22:21.009
one I've never dealt with because on paper my

00:22:21.009 --> 00:22:23.470
life is successful. I don't know why I'm writing

00:22:23.470 --> 00:22:26.049
this now. Maybe I'm hoping someone out there

00:22:26.049 --> 00:22:28.190
understands, or maybe I just needed to get it

00:22:28.190 --> 00:22:31.650
out of my head. Anyway, that's it. Wow. Man.

00:22:31.990 --> 00:22:35.049
I feel bad for this guy, Loki. Like, that's crazy.

00:22:35.549 --> 00:22:39.549
Oh. He needs to tell someone, and he needs to

00:22:39.549 --> 00:22:42.210
go to therapy. You can't just keep stealing.

00:22:42.670 --> 00:22:44.690
Well, it sounds like it's an addiction at this

00:22:44.690 --> 00:22:47.960
point. 100%. Like, I feel like... he's judging

00:22:47.960 --> 00:22:49.839
himself more harshly than like his wife would

00:22:49.839 --> 00:22:52.240
because like he explained this to his wife she

00:22:52.240 --> 00:22:55.619
might be like okay that's crazy and that's like

00:22:55.619 --> 00:22:57.640
obviously she would be hurt by it I think yes

00:22:57.640 --> 00:23:01.779
and concerned but I think after all the like

00:23:01.779 --> 00:23:03.980
years you've built together like she would be

00:23:03.980 --> 00:23:05.880
understanding she'd understand that like that's

00:23:05.880 --> 00:23:07.940
a you problem like you have an addiction you

00:23:07.940 --> 00:23:10.640
need help yeah for it I don't know. She could

00:23:10.640 --> 00:23:13.200
logically reason with him, I think, because she's

00:23:13.200 --> 00:23:15.819
outside of it. And he definitely, like he said,

00:23:16.019 --> 00:23:17.779
I just feel like there's a lot of shame associated

00:23:17.779 --> 00:23:21.279
with it for him right now. Well, 100%. So he

00:23:21.279 --> 00:23:24.079
said he's a C -level executive at a major company.

00:23:24.700 --> 00:23:27.819
So this is a guy that's got like a 500 Gs a year

00:23:27.819 --> 00:23:32.440
salary plus. C -level executive. He's got it

00:23:32.440 --> 00:23:36.140
made in the shade. And he's out here, where do

00:23:36.140 --> 00:23:41.720
you say? Socks? a Carmelo candy bar. It's getting

00:23:41.720 --> 00:23:44.759
expensive. Like, he's like, it's like, that's

00:23:44.759 --> 00:23:50.279
it. It just sounds so asinine that like, these

00:23:50.279 --> 00:23:52.740
are things that he buys without even thinking.

00:23:54.180 --> 00:23:56.019
Like, yeah, without a second thought, but he

00:23:56.019 --> 00:23:59.859
steals them impulsively. I feel bad though too,

00:23:59.859 --> 00:24:01.640
cause like, I feel like part of it's a little

00:24:01.640 --> 00:24:03.240
bit of trauma from his childhood. That's where

00:24:03.240 --> 00:24:05.460
like he developed a habit and it doesn't sound

00:24:05.460 --> 00:24:08.059
like he like wants to necessarily or he doesn't...

00:24:08.089 --> 00:24:09.990
and he's stealing socks and he sounds like he's

00:24:09.990 --> 00:24:12.250
like a millionaire. It is humongous branching,

00:24:12.269 --> 00:24:14.549
you know, like kids, wife, all the good things

00:24:14.549 --> 00:24:17.130
that, you know, people want in a successful life.

00:24:17.529 --> 00:24:18.869
And so it sounds like it's kind of like just

00:24:18.869 --> 00:24:20.450
a straight impulse feeling that he had taught

00:24:20.450 --> 00:24:23.029
his brain long ago that he can't unteach as easily

00:24:23.029 --> 00:24:25.109
without therapy or something like that. And second

00:24:25.109 --> 00:24:27.210
of all, I just think of like the embarrassment

00:24:27.210 --> 00:24:29.130
that would happen. Like I say, if he gets arrested

00:24:29.130 --> 00:24:32.089
for stealing, you know, two packs of socks or

00:24:32.089 --> 00:24:34.369
something like that, he's a millionaire, like

00:24:34.369 --> 00:24:36.170
executive of some company, something like that,

00:24:36.309 --> 00:24:39.269
getting arrested for stealing. $10 worth of stuff.

00:24:39.769 --> 00:24:42.750
It just seems weird. It's just such a backwards

00:24:42.750 --> 00:24:45.089
thing. And his family finding out in that way

00:24:45.089 --> 00:24:46.930
would be horrible. It'd be like, Dad's arrested

00:24:46.930 --> 00:24:49.049
for stealing this. We got money. What the heck?

00:24:49.210 --> 00:24:53.390
Yes. He could make restitution for everything

00:24:53.390 --> 00:24:57.250
that he's ever stolen in his life and be just

00:24:57.250 --> 00:24:58.529
fine. What were you going to say? Well, I was

00:24:58.529 --> 00:25:00.589
just thinking, do you think that his kids have

00:25:00.589 --> 00:25:03.210
ever seen him steal growing up on the store?

00:25:03.390 --> 00:25:05.269
Sorry. I don't think so. You don't think so?

00:25:05.470 --> 00:25:08.029
I don't know because I want my thought was like

00:25:08.029 --> 00:25:10.869
what I wonder if one of his little boys or whatever

00:25:10.869 --> 00:25:14.210
growing up saw him do like little things like

00:25:14.210 --> 00:25:16.750
that every once in a while and I wonder if he's

00:25:16.750 --> 00:25:19.170
like kind of the kids are carrying on the tradition

00:25:19.170 --> 00:25:21.710
kind of thing or at least one of them like do

00:25:21.710 --> 00:25:23.710
you think one of them has a similar addiction

00:25:23.710 --> 00:25:26.349
this is like me really jumping through hoops

00:25:26.349 --> 00:25:29.319
but yeah but why I'm just curious. I'd say the

00:25:29.319 --> 00:25:31.799
kids are less likely because they grew up with

00:25:31.799 --> 00:25:34.519
money, I think. He did it out of necessity. They

00:25:34.519 --> 00:25:36.339
would just do it just copying. I think it's less

00:25:36.339 --> 00:25:38.619
likely, but it's sort of impossible, though.

00:25:38.640 --> 00:25:41.319
That's a good point. But I'm going to have everything

00:25:41.319 --> 00:25:43.819
they need and they can never want. Yeah, they're

00:25:43.819 --> 00:25:47.460
not going hungry. That's literally what he says

00:25:47.460 --> 00:25:50.039
is at some point he became second nature because

00:25:50.039 --> 00:25:52.740
he started with a box of pasta or a loaf of bread.

00:25:52.740 --> 00:25:57.490
OK. I mean, this guy growing up in poverty, walks

00:25:57.490 --> 00:25:59.730
into the store and is like, I'm freaking starving.

00:25:59.829 --> 00:26:01.549
He's like looking at a pack of Twinkies. He's

00:26:01.549 --> 00:26:05.589
like, I need that. I'm too hungry. Twinkies,

00:26:05.630 --> 00:26:07.730
I'm just gonna take that out back. I'm gonna

00:26:07.730 --> 00:26:10.789
kill that right now. And yeah, so it comes from

00:26:10.789 --> 00:26:14.049
a place of like almost human instinct. Like I

00:26:14.049 --> 00:26:17.849
need to stay alive. I need food to eat. So that's

00:26:17.849 --> 00:26:20.869
where like the compulsiveness came from, but

00:26:20.869 --> 00:26:24.170
he never got rid of it. And I cannot fathom,

00:26:24.470 --> 00:26:27.059
like, being in that position and trying to explain

00:26:27.059 --> 00:26:30.259
that to someone. Like talk about feeling misunderstood.

00:26:30.460 --> 00:26:32.980
They'd be like, dude, you have to be very vulnerable.

00:26:33.119 --> 00:26:37.559
Yeah. What is your malfunction by the socks?

00:26:39.000 --> 00:26:41.920
Yeah, that's true. I mean, and the wife may understand

00:26:41.920 --> 00:26:44.720
more just because she's going to know is like

00:26:44.720 --> 00:26:47.680
back story and stuff. But yeah, that's that's

00:26:47.680 --> 00:26:49.400
basically what the comments are saying is like,

00:26:49.500 --> 00:27:21.940
dude, get help. Mmhmm. opened up about it. I

00:27:21.940 --> 00:27:24.960
love that. That's beautiful. I'm pretty sure

00:27:24.960 --> 00:27:27.200
I just, you know, I'm going to take that from

00:27:27.200 --> 00:27:28.559
your dad. I'm pretty sure I'm going to use that

00:27:28.559 --> 00:27:30.819
for the rest of my life. Every light is the best

00:27:30.819 --> 00:27:34.920
antiseptic. Yeah. That's cool. Joe's super into

00:27:34.920 --> 00:27:37.640
like light. What's your favorite scripture here?

00:27:38.420 --> 00:27:40.920
Yeah. Well, it's in Doctrine and Covenants 88.

00:27:41.460 --> 00:27:43.339
Therefore sanctify yourselves so your minds become

00:27:43.339 --> 00:27:44.880
single to God for the day shall come when you

00:27:44.880 --> 00:27:47.839
shall see him and God will face him to you. And

00:27:47.839 --> 00:27:51.000
essentially it's The next verse talks about how

00:27:51.000 --> 00:27:53.059
if your mind is single to the glory of God, your

00:27:53.059 --> 00:27:55.119
whole body will be filled with light. There shall

00:27:55.119 --> 00:27:57.119
be no darkness in you. And that body will just

00:27:57.119 --> 00:27:59.420
fill with light, comprehendeth all things. Yeah.

00:27:59.640 --> 00:28:02.359
Same. That's so good. Super cool stuff. I love

00:28:02.359 --> 00:28:04.279
all of that, like the symbolism in the scriptures

00:28:04.279 --> 00:28:07.480
of like light and dark can't coexist. Like light

00:28:07.480 --> 00:28:10.539
is like the only silver bullet, the only answer.

00:28:10.980 --> 00:28:13.440
So super fitting. Love it. I don't know, I feel

00:28:13.440 --> 00:28:15.220
like he's kind of been trying the same strategy

00:28:15.220 --> 00:28:17.619
to get over his entire life. Yes. And my thing

00:28:17.619 --> 00:28:20.220
is like, It's kind of like, I believe it's identical.

00:28:20.400 --> 00:28:22.240
It's like, you know, the definition of insanity

00:28:22.240 --> 00:28:24.059
is doing the same thing and hoping for different

00:28:24.059 --> 00:28:25.680
results. And I think that's kind of what he's

00:28:25.680 --> 00:28:27.720
doing. I think he's just like a willpower and

00:28:27.720 --> 00:28:29.819
this will go away. And really it's like, it's

00:28:29.819 --> 00:28:32.380
not like, obviously it's very clearly not working.

00:28:32.579 --> 00:28:33.920
That's not what your body needs or something.

00:28:34.059 --> 00:28:35.960
I know what your mind needs. So I think just

00:28:35.960 --> 00:28:38.819
don't do some change. Like a therapist, that'd

00:28:38.819 --> 00:28:40.980
be the number one thing probably. It's like they,

00:28:40.980 --> 00:28:43.130
they'd probably think you're like less crazy

00:28:43.130 --> 00:28:44.529
than anyone else. You could tell, to be completely

00:28:44.529 --> 00:28:46.589
honest, they've heard everything, but, or just

00:28:46.589 --> 00:28:48.869
make some sort of change, like some big change

00:28:48.869 --> 00:28:50.589
to be able to get a different result. So they're

00:28:50.589 --> 00:28:52.769
actually just doing the willpower thing. I think

00:28:52.769 --> 00:28:54.150
a lot of people do that, whether it's addiction

00:28:54.150 --> 00:28:56.230
or just things like that. They hope that with

00:28:56.230 --> 00:28:58.210
time it'll go away, but I'm like, it hasn't gone

00:28:58.210 --> 00:29:00.589
away yet with time. So it's just kind of, I don't

00:29:00.589 --> 00:29:02.710
have a false hope at that point, but. So true.

00:29:03.250 --> 00:29:05.430
Big facts. That's, that's a big theme of our

00:29:05.430 --> 00:29:09.369
household. Willpower, not a thing. You gotta

00:29:09.369 --> 00:29:12.849
be mindful. And exactly, you gotta process through

00:29:12.849 --> 00:29:15.730
kind of what's going on on the inside. And that's

00:29:15.730 --> 00:29:18.190
taken us years of therapy and stuff, so. Yeah.

00:29:18.849 --> 00:29:21.009
I dig that. This is a good comment. It says,

00:29:21.230 --> 00:29:23.190
I appreciate the honesty here. It takes guts

00:29:23.190 --> 00:29:25.230
to admit something like this. You're not a bad

00:29:25.230 --> 00:29:27.509
person. You're someone with a deeply ingrained

00:29:27.509 --> 00:29:30.670
coping mechanism. Doesn't excuse it, but it explains

00:29:30.670 --> 00:29:32.910
it. If you ever do decide to tell someone, pick

00:29:32.910 --> 00:29:35.289
someone safe who won't judge, you deserve to

00:29:35.289 --> 00:29:39.789
find peace from this. Wow. Internet's not prone

00:29:39.789 --> 00:29:41.670
to being understanding. So I'm glad that there's

00:29:41.670 --> 00:29:43.849
some I know there that are like thanks for your

00:29:43.849 --> 00:29:46.789
honesty Yeah, I was I was imagining a him just

00:29:46.789 --> 00:29:49.569
being fooled by everyone. Yeah, I mean, of course

00:29:49.569 --> 00:29:52.170
There's there's people are like, dude, no sense.

00:29:52.329 --> 00:29:54.349
Well, then there's this comment like dude during

00:29:54.349 --> 00:29:58.569
you're an R word. Oh There's the wolf in our

00:29:58.569 --> 00:30:03.589
loop I can't imagine the compulsion to do something

00:30:03.589 --> 00:30:07.390
like that. I'm such a rule follower like I I

00:30:07.980 --> 00:30:11.819
Actually, I tried to shoplift one time, and I

00:30:11.819 --> 00:30:14.559
learned my lessons so intensely. What? I didn't

00:30:14.559 --> 00:30:16.700
know that. I think I told you this story. I forgot.

00:30:17.220 --> 00:30:18.980
Look, it's going to be a short one. Okay, let's

00:30:18.980 --> 00:30:23.319
hear it. So, what I was going to steal, I'll

00:30:23.319 --> 00:30:24.759
give you a hint, see if you can guess. Carly

00:30:24.759 --> 00:30:28.799
Bar. No. It's one of Isla's favorite things in

00:30:28.799 --> 00:30:31.319
the world. So when I was, I was probably like

00:30:31.319 --> 00:30:34.019
her age, four or five. Oh, you were young. No,

00:30:34.019 --> 00:30:38.750
I was. I was just a little guy. I wanted some

00:30:38.750 --> 00:30:41.970
Ninja Turtle Band -Aids. Oh, she loves Band -Aids,

00:30:42.089 --> 00:30:45.789
not Ninja Turtle, Band -Aids. Yeah. I wanted

00:30:45.789 --> 00:30:47.710
these Ninja Turtle Band -Aids so bad, and my

00:30:47.710 --> 00:30:49.849
dad said no, and he usually said yes to everything.

00:30:50.329 --> 00:30:53.109
He said no this time, and I was like, I remember

00:30:53.109 --> 00:30:56.630
looking at them, and just like, I want these,

00:30:56.750 --> 00:30:59.029
and trying to put them in my pants. And he turned

00:30:59.029 --> 00:31:01.450
around in the aisle, and he saw me trying to

00:31:01.450 --> 00:31:04.049
put them in my pants, and he came up to me, and

00:31:04.049 --> 00:31:06.440
I was, you guys wouldn't know this, but. I was

00:31:06.440 --> 00:31:09.960
raised by just my dad, just him and I, very bachelor

00:31:09.960 --> 00:31:12.480
pad style. He came up to me and he was like,

00:31:12.619 --> 00:31:15.500
but you're going to go to jail. You tried to

00:31:15.500 --> 00:31:17.759
steal these, you're going to go to jail and be

00:31:17.759 --> 00:31:20.119
really scared. It's going to be cold and dark.

00:31:21.000 --> 00:31:24.920
And I just started crying, took them out, learned

00:31:24.920 --> 00:31:27.640
my lesson. Never going to try to take something

00:31:27.640 --> 00:31:30.140
that doesn't belong to me. I've never shoplifted

00:31:30.140 --> 00:31:33.859
since. Wow. It was one of those things where

00:31:33.859 --> 00:31:36.359
seeing the story, I was just like... That is

00:31:36.359 --> 00:31:40.160
insane to think somebody that's got it made It's

00:31:40.160 --> 00:31:42.640
like I have to I just have to take it. I'd love

00:31:42.640 --> 00:31:45.079
to have a conversation with them, too Like yeah,

00:31:45.079 --> 00:31:47.240
I wonder if it is the same thing if he goes to

00:31:47.240 --> 00:31:49.619
somebody's house and they have stuff like he

00:31:49.619 --> 00:31:51.480
would be trying to take their stuff or is it

00:31:51.480 --> 00:31:54.559
just like Commercialism big business capitalism

00:31:54.559 --> 00:31:56.420
the hates. I don't know if it's not wearing their

00:31:56.420 --> 00:32:00.400
clothes Still my freaking whatever just don't

00:32:00.400 --> 00:32:04.059
wear my panties I'm ready for my sir. If you're

00:32:04.059 --> 00:32:06.769
ready, I've been ready So this is from True off

00:32:06.769 --> 00:32:10.390
my chest. My late husband's best friend confessed

00:32:10.390 --> 00:32:14.309
he's been waiting for me. I feel confused, not

00:32:14.309 --> 00:32:17.630
flattered. I'm a 38 year old widow and mother

00:32:17.630 --> 00:32:19.809
of an 11 year old boy. My husband passed away

00:32:19.809 --> 00:32:22.349
three years ago in a car accident. His best friend,

00:32:22.369 --> 00:32:24.970
let's call him Jay, has always stayed around

00:32:24.970 --> 00:32:27.150
helping with errands and occasionally checking

00:32:27.150 --> 00:32:29.230
in, even helping my son with his homework when

00:32:29.230 --> 00:32:31.170
I couldn't. A few nights ago I have to be at

00:32:31.170 --> 00:32:33.029
a glass of wine in the kitchen while my son was

00:32:33.029 --> 00:32:35.609
asleep. He confessed he's been in love with me

00:32:35.609 --> 00:32:38.079
for years. He said he didn't speak when my husband

00:32:38.079 --> 00:32:41.000
was alive out of respect, but now believes maybe

00:32:41.000 --> 00:32:43.640
we're meant to be. I was stunned. This is someone

00:32:43.640 --> 00:32:45.740
I trusted like a brother. I didn't know how to

00:32:45.740 --> 00:32:48.339
respond. A part of me feels guilty for not immediately

00:32:48.339 --> 00:32:50.480
pushing him away and another part of me feels

00:32:50.480 --> 00:32:53.839
even guiltier for wondering what if. I feel emotionally

00:32:53.839 --> 00:32:55.940
overwhelmed. I don't think I'm ready for anything,

00:32:55.980 --> 00:32:58.140
but I also haven't felt desired or emotionally

00:32:58.140 --> 00:33:00.559
supported in so long. I don't know what to think.

00:33:00.779 --> 00:33:02.640
I guess I just needed to share this somewhere

00:33:02.640 --> 00:33:05.019
anonymously. Thanks for reading if you made it

00:33:05.019 --> 00:33:11.480
this far. Okay. Okay. Well, the dude's into you.

00:33:11.660 --> 00:33:13.420
So let's say she called him like a brother and

00:33:13.420 --> 00:33:15.279
that I'm like, it's getting overdue. Like, don't

00:33:15.279 --> 00:33:18.359
stop trying. Like, that's the word brother is

00:33:18.359 --> 00:33:20.720
worse than a friend. Like you're like a friend

00:33:20.720 --> 00:33:23.380
to me. It's like you were like a brother to me.

00:33:24.039 --> 00:33:29.420
That's like, I know that's like even worse. Can

00:33:29.420 --> 00:33:31.680
you imagine how you feel? You're like your husband

00:33:31.680 --> 00:33:33.400
said, and then he comes to you and you think

00:33:33.400 --> 00:33:35.240
that you have this great relationship and you're

00:33:35.240 --> 00:33:38.049
so grateful. Then he's like I've been in love

00:33:38.049 --> 00:33:40.630
with you like that's just trust broken. I don't

00:33:40.630 --> 00:33:44.829
yeah, that's horrible. Oh She said three years

00:33:44.829 --> 00:33:49.069
three, but I mean like she says I'm not ready

00:33:49.069 --> 00:33:52.410
Three years, would you be ready in three years

00:33:52.410 --> 00:33:54.970
if I die? I we don't have to think about that

00:33:54.970 --> 00:33:58.069
So I died or if I died and you weren't remarried

00:33:58.069 --> 00:33:59.930
in three years. I'd be like haunting you I'd

00:33:59.930 --> 00:34:05.750
be like Let's literally go go. What are you doing

00:34:05.750 --> 00:34:09.829
by yourself? We have money go to him Do we feel

00:34:09.829 --> 00:34:12.650
like she's low -key like egging him on it all

00:34:12.650 --> 00:34:15.489
though? Yes Like they're having wine together

00:34:15.489 --> 00:34:18.489
at night, right? That's not is that is that like

00:34:18.489 --> 00:34:21.630
a brother -sister theme view? I don't think so.

00:34:21.730 --> 00:34:24.610
I know he's not seeing it that way, which yeah,

00:34:24.610 --> 00:34:26.190
that's the thing Maybe it wasn't a wine that

00:34:26.190 --> 00:34:29.690
invited him. There's a little feeling. Yes. Here's

00:34:29.690 --> 00:34:32.039
the thing though is we're talking three years

00:34:32.039 --> 00:34:34.820
after it's not like he's like a month after the

00:34:34.820 --> 00:34:37.519
guy's buried and he's like hey so me and you

00:34:37.519 --> 00:34:40.260
yeah right like three years is a long enough

00:34:40.260 --> 00:34:43.480
time he's involved with the family yeah maybe

00:34:43.480 --> 00:34:45.760
she's giving him the googly eyes sometimes after

00:34:45.760 --> 00:34:48.539
she drinks the wine too like that's true yeah

00:34:48.539 --> 00:34:50.679
you just you never know but like when is she

00:34:50.679 --> 00:34:53.119
gonna be ready and who's a who's the right person

00:34:53.119 --> 00:34:56.380
yeah because i don't know if it's him no i agree

00:34:56.380 --> 00:34:58.400
though i just like it would have been different

00:34:58.400 --> 00:35:01.960
if he if Feelings like grew over time. Like three

00:35:01.960 --> 00:35:04.420
years is kind of a long time to like process

00:35:04.420 --> 00:35:06.539
grief and move on. It would have been different,

00:35:06.539 --> 00:35:09.139
but the fact that he was like, I've loved you

00:35:09.139 --> 00:35:12.539
when you were married. That's a little red flag

00:35:12.539 --> 00:35:15.219
is true. I don't know if that's a little creepy.

00:35:15.500 --> 00:35:17.860
He should have just left that out. I would not

00:35:17.860 --> 00:35:22.719
have said that. Brother now. Then just make sure

00:35:22.719 --> 00:35:24.519
question his intentions. Even when you come over,

00:35:24.599 --> 00:35:26.480
what is this husband like? Why do you tell my

00:35:26.480 --> 00:35:27.900
husband's funeral is it because your best friend

00:35:27.900 --> 00:35:30.840
or is it because me or something like that just

00:35:30.840 --> 00:35:33.380
to like clean up crew here or something but oh

00:35:33.380 --> 00:35:36.500
that's icky like this swooped me away and like

00:35:36.500 --> 00:35:37.940
the only reason to tell me is out of respect

00:35:37.940 --> 00:35:39.420
and i'm just like that doesn't sit right with

00:35:39.420 --> 00:35:41.159
me you know just like i didn't tell you i loved

00:35:41.159 --> 00:35:42.400
you because of respect i'm like but that's just

00:35:42.400 --> 00:35:44.280
something you don't do at all like yeah you shouldn't

00:35:44.280 --> 00:35:46.239
be with someone don't confess your love to that

00:35:46.239 --> 00:35:47.820
just like i'll play anything you don't do not

00:35:47.820 --> 00:35:50.380
just like uh you know i respect your husband

00:35:50.380 --> 00:35:52.300
so i won't do that just kind of sounds like he's

00:35:52.300 --> 00:35:54.780
being held back by her but i'm like that's not

00:35:54.780 --> 00:35:57.079
how my other question is has he been single this

00:35:57.079 --> 00:36:00.369
whole time Like, that's a good question. I feel

00:36:00.369 --> 00:36:04.289
like, yeah, I'm feeling like he's like a divorced

00:36:04.289 --> 00:36:06.369
guy. Okay. That's what I'm feeling. And he's

00:36:06.369 --> 00:36:09.809
been divorced for like 10 years. Or he's perma

00:36:09.809 --> 00:36:11.989
-single. Maybe he's the guy that's never been

00:36:11.989 --> 00:36:14.309
married and just like finally shooting a shot

00:36:14.309 --> 00:36:17.250
because his best friend died and the girl of

00:36:17.250 --> 00:36:19.329
his dreams is finally single for three years.

00:36:19.469 --> 00:36:22.909
Yeah. Okay. No, I'm just kidding. No, no. Just

00:36:22.909 --> 00:36:25.349
based on the comments and her response to all

00:36:25.349 --> 00:36:27.909
the comments, I don't think, one, she's ever

00:36:27.909 --> 00:36:31.550
gonna take him, and two, she just is like, I

00:36:31.550 --> 00:36:33.449
just need time, I need time, I don't know how

00:36:33.449 --> 00:36:35.969
I feel about this. And it's kinda like, if you

00:36:35.969 --> 00:36:37.449
don't know how you feel about it, that's kinda

00:36:37.449 --> 00:36:40.489
your answer. Yeah. I think you're just wrongly,

00:36:41.010 --> 00:36:43.969
and I think he's the only guy that's shown interest

00:36:43.969 --> 00:36:45.909
in the past three years, and it's comfortable.

00:36:46.150 --> 00:36:48.750
Like, he's someone that's been comfortable, and

00:36:48.750 --> 00:36:51.929
now it's uncomfortable, but. So. This one has

00:36:51.929 --> 00:36:56.170
to do with the secret life being exposed, but

00:36:56.170 --> 00:37:00.869
the guy with the secret, he dies. So that's my

00:37:00.869 --> 00:37:03.210
little, that's my little plug, but just, so this

00:37:03.210 --> 00:37:06.289
one comes from, am I the asshole? The title is,

00:37:06.670 --> 00:37:08.590
would I be the asshole for refusing to raise

00:37:08.590 --> 00:37:12.190
my husband's affair children now that he and

00:37:12.190 --> 00:37:22.090
the woman he cheated with passed away. Literally

00:37:22.090 --> 00:37:26.230
though, so there's this is layers. There's updates.

00:37:26.510 --> 00:37:29.489
So we're diving in. I beg your finest pardon.

00:37:30.869 --> 00:37:37.090
Yes. Excuse me. What's it called? An orphanage?

00:37:37.269 --> 00:37:42.170
You going to an orphanage? See, what's it called

00:37:42.170 --> 00:37:46.329
child objective sir? Yes, yes. Look at me. I'm

00:37:46.329 --> 00:37:51.860
your lifeline. I will help you. I will not. No,

00:37:51.900 --> 00:37:54.300
I'm just kidding. Okay. Sorry for using a new

00:37:54.300 --> 00:37:56.099
account. I know that's a red flag, but I don't

00:37:56.099 --> 00:37:59.280
want to risk my old Reddit account. My 45F husband,

00:37:59.360 --> 00:38:04.139
49M of 23 years, had an affair with a 20 year

00:38:04.139 --> 00:38:08.800
old girl since 2020. I found out this year when

00:38:08.800 --> 00:38:11.280
his affair partner gave birth to twin boys in

00:38:11.280 --> 00:38:13.900
March. Obviously we were going to divorce. We've

00:38:13.900 --> 00:38:16.000
been hashing things out since. It's been a lengthy

00:38:16.000 --> 00:38:18.199
process due to some properties in common and

00:38:18.199 --> 00:38:20.260
we needed to get an accountant since he used

00:38:20.260 --> 00:38:25.820
the shared account for his affair. Finally, things

00:38:25.820 --> 00:38:28.099
seem to be getting close to the end when both

00:38:28.099 --> 00:38:30.360
my husband and the woman he cheated with were

00:38:30.360 --> 00:38:33.869
killed in a car crash. By some miracle the twin

00:38:33.869 --> 00:38:36.489
babies were not harmed in the crash. Now they

00:38:36.489 --> 00:38:38.250
are orphaned and neither set of grandparents

00:38:38.250 --> 00:38:40.670
can take them in permanently. My husband's parents

00:38:40.670 --> 00:38:42.929
are both in assisted living, he has no siblings

00:38:42.929 --> 00:38:45.730
and the only aunt that could take them refuses.

00:38:46.159 --> 00:38:48.519
She's been child free her whole life. On the

00:38:48.519 --> 00:38:50.659
woman's side, I'm not sure the details in full,

00:38:50.800 --> 00:38:53.280
but her parents are also not able to be involved

00:38:53.280 --> 00:38:56.159
long term, and the one sister she has lives overseas.

00:38:56.460 --> 00:38:58.820
Since we were still married and he had not updated

00:38:58.820 --> 00:39:01.360
his will, all his assets are set to pass to me

00:39:01.360 --> 00:39:03.539
and our two children. I'm not callous enough

00:39:03.539 --> 00:39:05.639
to leave those babies with nothing, so I agreed

00:39:05.639 --> 00:39:08.039
to let whoever is their legal guardian have the

00:39:08.039 --> 00:39:10.159
remaining balance in the shared account. About

00:39:10.159 --> 00:39:13.309
$25 ,000 in savings. The issue is no one wants

00:39:13.309 --> 00:39:15.610
to take them in. Now my in -laws are pressuring

00:39:15.610 --> 00:39:17.889
me to take them in and raise them. The issue

00:39:17.889 --> 00:39:20.989
is I don't want to at all. I wouldn't love them

00:39:20.989 --> 00:39:23.030
and I don't want to be the evil stepmother. But

00:39:23.030 --> 00:39:24.869
I know a big part of me will always have a level

00:39:24.869 --> 00:39:27.170
of resentment towards them. I'll probably favor

00:39:27.170 --> 00:39:30.530
my own children. Yes. Makes sense. Understandable.

00:39:31.190 --> 00:39:33.530
Yeah. It's not their fault, but I truly love

00:39:33.530 --> 00:39:35.389
my husband and I thought we were happy before

00:39:35.389 --> 00:39:37.989
I found out about the affair. We have two daughters.

00:39:38.250 --> 00:39:41.130
14 and 16. Obviously we had disagreements but

00:39:41.130 --> 00:39:43.289
never insulted each other before. Then I found

00:39:43.289 --> 00:39:45.349
out about the affair and he began calling me

00:39:45.349 --> 00:39:47.869
names and blaming me for his cheating. He became

00:39:47.869 --> 00:39:49.949
abusive and even tried to kick me out of the

00:39:49.949 --> 00:39:52.869
house, my childhood home that is not shared property

00:39:52.869 --> 00:39:55.449
for the record. I'm also raising teenagers alone

00:39:55.449 --> 00:39:57.289
now. I don't have the energy to raise babies

00:39:57.289 --> 00:39:59.590
anymore. My daughters hate their baby brothers.

00:39:59.769 --> 00:40:01.510
I tried to get them to spend time with their

00:40:01.510 --> 00:40:03.969
dad as we were divorcing, but they refused. Since

00:40:03.969 --> 00:40:06.010
this was all found out because of the babies,

00:40:06.110 --> 00:40:08.570
there wasn't really a way to sugarcoat the situation.

00:40:08.670 --> 00:40:10.650
They are also too old to really get away with

00:40:10.650 --> 00:40:12.550
it. Most of my friends agree it's not my place

00:40:12.550 --> 00:40:14.590
to care for those children, but my in -laws,

00:40:14.829 --> 00:40:17.710
the affair woman's parents, and my mother want

00:40:17.710 --> 00:40:19.909
me to raise them. I know my mom is just having

00:40:19.909 --> 00:40:22.630
grandkids fever, but it hurts to not have her

00:40:22.630 --> 00:40:25.969
support. I have to make a decision by next week

00:40:25.969 --> 00:40:27.750
or the boys would be going into foster care.

00:40:27.989 --> 00:40:30.309
At the moment, they are temporarily placed with

00:40:30.309 --> 00:40:32.590
their maternal grandparents. I feel horrible,

00:40:32.949 --> 00:40:35.210
but I'm very sure I can't take them in. Would

00:40:35.210 --> 00:40:37.510
I be the a -hole if I refused to take them in?

00:40:38.360 --> 00:40:41.679
I am so upset with the maternal grandparents.

00:40:42.139 --> 00:40:44.840
Yeah, that is a lot of nerve. Like, okay, in

00:40:44.840 --> 00:40:47.659
-laws, you can take your freaking great kids.

00:40:47.739 --> 00:40:50.059
You're taking care of them right now. Keep them.

00:40:50.559 --> 00:40:53.099
They're yours. That is your blood. It's not hers.

00:40:53.739 --> 00:40:55.920
At all. Mm -hmm. But, and you know, when they

00:40:55.920 --> 00:40:58.059
say maternal, you know who they're talking about.

00:40:58.340 --> 00:41:01.420
The mom's parents. No, the fail - The fail moment

00:41:01.420 --> 00:41:06.260
parents. Yeah. Yeah. No, the mom of the two boys'

00:41:06.579 --> 00:41:08.559
parents. That's what I'm saying. The dead 20

00:41:08.559 --> 00:41:10.920
-something. The mom. The mom's parents. That's

00:41:10.920 --> 00:41:14.219
what I'm saying. Yes. Mom's parents of the children.

00:41:14.719 --> 00:41:20.019
Of the cheaters. The cheater kids is what they

00:41:20.019 --> 00:41:24.199
are. That's hard. I just, being completely honest,

00:41:24.219 --> 00:41:26.360
she does have no obligation to take care of them.

00:41:26.519 --> 00:41:29.380
You just not related to them in any way. They

00:41:29.380 --> 00:41:32.119
were done behind her back. I've heard stories

00:41:32.119 --> 00:41:35.179
of wives that do take care of them, and I have

00:41:35.179 --> 00:41:37.820
massive respect for them, but also it's like

00:41:37.820 --> 00:41:41.360
her other children hate them, her own children

00:41:41.360 --> 00:41:43.460
hate them, she would hate them, things like that,

00:41:43.500 --> 00:41:45.079
not because she's a bad person, but just because

00:41:45.079 --> 00:41:50.159
there's no way to disassociate her horrible husband

00:41:50.159 --> 00:41:54.119
verbally and threaten things, abuse her and stuff,

00:41:55.199 --> 00:41:57.179
but I think if you would remind her of that and

00:41:57.179 --> 00:41:59.409
remind... her own kids and how much they hate

00:41:59.409 --> 00:42:00.789
their own dad. And just like, don't take them

00:42:00.789 --> 00:42:02.510
in. Like, you'd be much happier in a different

00:42:02.510 --> 00:42:06.929
home. 100%. He has hurt her enough and her family.

00:42:07.769 --> 00:42:10.869
There has been enough there. And to add on to

00:42:10.869 --> 00:42:13.710
that, he died. And so now her own children don't

00:42:13.710 --> 00:42:16.170
have a father anymore. So it's like, that is

00:42:16.170 --> 00:42:19.909
way too much that in -laws need to take the kids.

00:42:19.909 --> 00:42:23.769
And if they can't, I 1000 % believe those kids

00:42:23.769 --> 00:42:25.929
would have a better life with a different family.

00:42:25.949 --> 00:42:28.440
I would hope. I have heard horror stories about

00:42:28.440 --> 00:42:30.500
child protective services and they go in for

00:42:30.500 --> 00:42:33.119
heritable families. So like, I don't know. All

00:42:33.119 --> 00:42:37.980
I know is this woman needs to heal. Yeah. Here's

00:42:37.980 --> 00:42:42.139
my pick. It's not these babies' fault that their

00:42:42.139 --> 00:42:45.019
parents, that their dad was a jackass and that

00:42:45.019 --> 00:42:48.219
literally that, you know, and their 20 year old

00:42:48.219 --> 00:42:51.519
mom was also responsible, obviously, but like

00:42:51.519 --> 00:42:53.940
really young. I don't know. It's just, it makes

00:42:53.940 --> 00:42:56.250
me sad because it's not these babies fault the

00:42:56.250 --> 00:42:59.449
sins of the father, not their trumes. And so,

00:42:59.570 --> 00:43:00.869
or like, you know, the mistakes of their father,

00:43:01.030 --> 00:43:04.389
not their mistakes. Yeah. And so I, I don't know.

00:43:04.590 --> 00:43:06.869
I, I feel bad. I understand if you can't take

00:43:06.869 --> 00:43:08.809
them. There's so many people, Ren and I talk

00:43:08.809 --> 00:43:10.050
about this all the time. There's so many people

00:43:10.050 --> 00:43:13.389
wanting to adopt babies. Yeah. You know, and

00:43:13.389 --> 00:43:16.250
like, I understand it, but I just, I don't, I

00:43:16.250 --> 00:43:17.690
don't know how I feel about little girls like

00:43:17.690 --> 00:43:19.449
hating their baby brothers. I'm like, it's not,

00:43:19.929 --> 00:43:22.289
they're innocent. Yeah. Innocent. That's, I was

00:43:22.289 --> 00:43:24.389
going to make a comment on that, but they are

00:43:24.389 --> 00:43:27.929
also 14 and 16 year old girls who just had their

00:43:27.929 --> 00:43:31.469
dad die. Yeah, and so yeah, so they hated him

00:43:31.469 --> 00:43:33.510
before anyway They were super mad at the dad.

00:43:33.670 --> 00:43:35.170
They was they didn't want anything to do with

00:43:35.170 --> 00:43:37.309
him when they found out about the affair But

00:43:37.309 --> 00:43:40.949
then he died so 14 to 16 year old girls hate

00:43:40.949 --> 00:43:45.429
anyone and everything That's true So it's not

00:43:45.429 --> 00:43:47.809
like they need an excuse any other I mean the

00:43:47.809 --> 00:43:49.769
babies will find out in one of the updates which

00:43:49.920 --> 00:43:51.980
I was going to brace you guys. There's, there's

00:43:51.980 --> 00:43:58.260
a lot. Oh man. Okay. So obviously if, if, if

00:43:58.260 --> 00:44:00.840
something just, if you need to say it, say it,

00:44:00.960 --> 00:44:04.860
but there's a lot. So small update. where it

00:44:04.860 --> 00:44:34.510
starts. This is update number one. adoptions

00:44:34.510 --> 00:44:37.230
or fostering. but my daughters are my top priority.

00:44:37.429 --> 00:44:39.630
It'll be up to the twins' grandparents to decide

00:44:39.630 --> 00:44:41.750
if they'll proceed with adoption, keep them,

00:44:41.750 --> 00:44:43.969
or turn them to the state. I wish I had the mental

00:44:43.969 --> 00:44:46.150
capacity to be the person to do this, but I have

00:44:46.150 --> 00:44:48.010
two girls that are going through a lot and they

00:44:48.010 --> 00:44:49.969
need my full attention. I'll also be talking

00:44:49.969 --> 00:44:51.889
to the lawyers to figure out if the boys have

00:44:51.889 --> 00:44:54.630
any inheritance claim properly. If they do, I'll

00:44:54.630 --> 00:44:56.570
separate it and leave it to the lawyers to do

00:44:56.570 --> 00:44:58.989
what they need to do for them to have access

00:44:58.989 --> 00:45:01.090
when it's best. If they don't, I'll find a way

00:45:01.090 --> 00:45:03.309
to ensure they have access to the $25 ,000 I

00:45:03.309 --> 00:45:05.190
was going to give them since the beginning. I

00:45:05.190 --> 00:45:07.550
won't do more, however. My moral compass might

00:45:07.550 --> 00:45:10.010
be biased, but I don't believe I'm obligated,

00:45:10.130 --> 00:45:12.349
neither morally nor legally, to do more than

00:45:12.349 --> 00:45:15.269
what the word of the law says. I can't help everyone,

00:45:15.269 --> 00:45:17.329
and I shouldn't have to. I have two girls that

00:45:17.329 --> 00:45:19.730
lost their father, two girls that need therapy,

00:45:20.110 --> 00:45:22.590
two girls just about to get to college. They've

00:45:22.590 --> 00:45:24.329
gone through enough without seeing their mother

00:45:24.329 --> 00:45:26.289
favor the children of their father's mistress.

00:45:26.570 --> 00:45:29.550
Big facts. I'm liking where this update's going,

00:45:29.969 --> 00:45:33.130
so I'm okay so far. So here's the second update.

00:45:33.239 --> 00:45:35.159
Hey everyone, so as I said two nights ago, I

00:45:35.159 --> 00:45:37.940
went yesterday to speak to the twins' grandparents.

00:45:38.119 --> 00:45:40.820
I explained my position and refused to take guardianship

00:45:40.820 --> 00:45:42.980
of the boys. My mother -in -law almost slapped

00:45:42.980 --> 00:45:45.079
me when I said that, but thankfully this was

00:45:45.079 --> 00:45:47.139
all done in a public place and my father -in

00:45:47.139 --> 00:45:49.239
-law stopped her. The maternal grandparents kept

00:45:49.239 --> 00:45:51.079
pleading for me to raise them since they didn't

00:45:51.079 --> 00:45:53.039
want to lose them. I kept saying no and when

00:45:53.039 --> 00:45:55.360
they called me selfish, I lost it. I told them

00:45:55.360 --> 00:45:57.800
to their face that the only selfish people in

00:45:57.800 --> 00:46:00.199
this mess were them and their son and daughter.

00:46:00.340 --> 00:46:03.429
Their son, my husband, for cheating and then

00:46:03.429 --> 00:46:06.050
making the divorce hell on me and my girls and

00:46:06.050 --> 00:46:08.550
their daughter because she was a beep that went

00:46:08.550 --> 00:46:11.099
after a married man twice her age. I told them

00:46:11.099 --> 00:46:13.280
if I heard from them again, I would request a

00:46:13.280 --> 00:46:15.539
cease and desist. I also informed my parents

00:46:15.539 --> 00:46:17.840
-in -law that they won't have access to my daughters

00:46:17.840 --> 00:46:19.880
for the foreseeable future. I'll explain why

00:46:19.880 --> 00:46:21.699
in a bit. We were at a restaurant, but I didn't

00:46:21.699 --> 00:46:23.960
stay for the meal. I also sent an email to my

00:46:23.960 --> 00:46:26.960
lawyer so we can ensure CPS that any agency involved

00:46:26.960 --> 00:46:29.079
in the welfare of the twins is aware I'm not

00:46:29.079 --> 00:46:31.380
going to be their guardian or be involved. Then

00:46:31.380 --> 00:46:33.820
I sent an email to my in -laws with all the usernames

00:46:33.820 --> 00:46:35.579
and websites from people here in Reddit that

00:46:35.579 --> 00:46:37.179
have offered to do interviews for the twins'

00:46:37.559 --> 00:46:39.300
adoption. I won't be involved beyond this point,

00:46:39.300 --> 00:46:41.820
so please As lovely as it is, I can't help you

00:46:41.820 --> 00:46:43.659
if you were interested in the boys. Yesterday

00:46:43.659 --> 00:46:45.840
was the end of my involvement. As for why my

00:46:45.840 --> 00:46:48.099
in -laws won't see my girls, I spoke to my daughters

00:46:48.099 --> 00:46:50.380
and decided to find out more about their thoughts

00:46:50.380 --> 00:46:52.860
before I went to meet the grandparents. My youngest

00:46:52.860 --> 00:46:55.440
refused to speak to me, which I found very out

00:46:55.440 --> 00:46:57.639
of place for her. My oldest then asked for just

00:46:57.639 --> 00:46:59.579
the two of us to speak. That's when she explained

00:46:59.579 --> 00:47:01.559
that my in -laws had been going on about how

00:47:01.559 --> 00:47:03.599
the girls need to get ready to go to public school

00:47:03.599 --> 00:47:05.900
instead of their private school and get jobs

00:47:05.900 --> 00:47:07.519
right out of high school since I will have to

00:47:07.519 --> 00:47:09.980
provide the twins with private schooling and

00:47:09.980 --> 00:47:12.480
college money. Apparently they also were told

00:47:12.480 --> 00:47:14.480
to start moving their stuff to a shared room.

00:47:14.679 --> 00:47:16.539
My girls have separate rooms since the twins

00:47:16.539 --> 00:47:19.360
need more space. This was not known to me, mostly

00:47:19.360 --> 00:47:21.000
because that would never happen. Apparently my

00:47:21.000 --> 00:47:22.820
in -laws have been basically bullying the girls

00:47:22.820 --> 00:47:25.659
because the babies take priority. Yeah, that's

00:47:25.659 --> 00:47:28.300
not happening. I told the girls that their grandparents

00:47:28.300 --> 00:47:30.500
have no say in where they go to school, their

00:47:30.500 --> 00:47:33.159
college funds, or how the rooms are set in our

00:47:33.159 --> 00:47:35.980
house. Also that I do agree they could use a

00:47:35.980 --> 00:47:38.179
part -time job during college and maybe a scholarship.

00:47:38.460 --> 00:47:40.960
but their tuition will be paid. I told them not

00:47:40.960 --> 00:47:42.860
to blame the babies for the stupidity of the

00:47:42.860 --> 00:47:45.300
adults. They told me they understand, but they

00:47:45.300 --> 00:47:46.820
still don't want to interact with their brothers

00:47:46.820 --> 00:47:49.239
for now. That for now part gives me hope they'll

00:47:49.239 --> 00:47:51.360
get through things. For now, we're gonna do some

00:47:51.360 --> 00:47:53.679
changes in the house. The girls and I both don't

00:47:53.679 --> 00:47:55.579
like there's still an office space that my husband

00:47:55.579 --> 00:47:57.760
used. We're gonna make it into a gaming room

00:47:57.760 --> 00:48:00.119
for all of us. I plan to take down some pictures

00:48:00.119 --> 00:48:01.960
that have my husband in them and put them in

00:48:01.960 --> 00:48:04.170
albums for the girls. We just want to make the

00:48:04.170 --> 00:48:07.030
house more ours. I have to just quickly say,

00:48:07.489 --> 00:48:09.849
a mom and a 14 -year -old and a 16 -year -old

00:48:09.849 --> 00:48:13.150
daughter, not the prototype for changing an office

00:48:13.150 --> 00:48:15.889
into a gaming station. Oh, well, for sure. I

00:48:15.889 --> 00:48:18.630
know. I was thinking, like, beauty spa or something

00:48:18.630 --> 00:48:21.289
along those lines. Yeah, good for them. They're

00:48:21.289 --> 00:48:24.429
like, Rowlite, we're going to play Fortnite,

00:48:24.789 --> 00:48:27.000
the three of us. As for people wondering why

00:48:27.000 --> 00:48:28.840
my girls wanted nothing to do with their father,

00:48:29.139 --> 00:48:30.960
my daughters were the ones that discovered the

00:48:30.960 --> 00:48:32.860
affair and told me when my husband took them

00:48:32.860 --> 00:48:35.400
to meet the twins at the hospital. He had asked

00:48:35.400 --> 00:48:37.920
them to keep it a secret, but my girls told me.

00:48:38.079 --> 00:48:40.239
After that, my husband began treating them horribly

00:48:40.239 --> 00:48:43.059
too. He burnt all bridges with the girls. They

00:48:43.059 --> 00:48:45.880
are fascinating. Trying to blame them? Yeah.

00:48:46.239 --> 00:48:48.400
Like, so the mom didn't know he was having an

00:48:48.400 --> 00:48:50.800
affair. He told it to the girls first. He was

00:48:50.800 --> 00:48:52.719
like, hey, here's your baby brothers, by the

00:48:52.719 --> 00:48:55.420
way. Oh, don't tell your mom. Yeah. Are you kidding

00:48:55.420 --> 00:48:57.260
me right now? He's like, come meet your baby

00:48:57.260 --> 00:48:59.320
brothers. This is so exciting. And there's just

00:48:59.320 --> 00:49:01.440
like some other lady just like laying in the

00:49:01.440 --> 00:49:05.739
hospital bed. Hey. That would be so traumatic.

00:49:06.380 --> 00:49:10.219
So traumatic. So confusing. So wrong. That provides

00:49:10.219 --> 00:49:12.300
a little bit of context as to why they don't

00:49:12.300 --> 00:49:14.940
want any interaction with their brothers. I understand

00:49:14.940 --> 00:49:17.940
that now because that was like that's a traumatizing

00:49:17.940 --> 00:49:20.170
like memory. Just your dad being like, oh, by

00:49:20.170 --> 00:49:23.210
the way, here's your brothers with not your mother,

00:49:23.349 --> 00:49:25.829
like, you know. And like giving birth like that

00:49:25.829 --> 00:49:28.929
type of intimacy. It's so that's like the big

00:49:28.929 --> 00:49:31.949
like that's that's how they find out their husband's

00:49:31.949 --> 00:49:34.489
cheating. Is that that's like kids are like,

00:49:34.750 --> 00:49:37.250
hey, mom, dad just picked us up from school.

00:49:37.269 --> 00:49:39.369
And then we went and found out that we have two

00:49:39.369 --> 00:49:40.889
little brothers. Did you know he was cheating

00:49:40.889 --> 00:49:43.489
on you? Oh, yeah. How do you even bring it here?

00:49:43.730 --> 00:49:47.539
Crazy. Mom, I got some bad news. Yeah. Dad got

00:49:47.539 --> 00:49:49.559
another girl pregnant and they just had twin

00:49:49.559 --> 00:49:52.679
boys together. We just met them. I went to let

00:49:52.679 --> 00:49:54.780
her know. Like a prank almost. Like that's crazy.

00:49:55.280 --> 00:49:56.880
Literally. Like man dude's 40 years old while

00:49:56.880 --> 00:49:58.739
dude's really 10 years old. Like acting like

00:49:58.739 --> 00:50:01.820
that in my opinion. Yeah and I think he probably

00:50:01.820 --> 00:50:03.760
gets it from his parents. Like they see it. I

00:50:03.760 --> 00:50:06.320
bet they knew. I bet they knew the whole time.

00:50:06.460 --> 00:50:09.739
Or he was having an affair because the way that...

00:50:09.550 --> 00:50:12.010
Like, when would I have time to talk to his daughters?

00:50:12.210 --> 00:50:14.730
They're like, oh, by the way, you need to get

00:50:14.730 --> 00:50:17.630
ready so your brothers can move in and go out.

00:50:17.789 --> 00:50:20.710
Like, how? I can't even imagine my grandparents

00:50:20.710 --> 00:50:23.030
saying that to me. Like, to being like, um, by

00:50:23.030 --> 00:50:25.389
the way, you're, you're less important than your

00:50:25.389 --> 00:50:29.170
brothers. Yeah. That's crazy to me. That's like

00:50:29.170 --> 00:50:31.570
so heartbreaking. I don't know. This is so heartbreaking.

00:50:31.809 --> 00:50:33.610
It's just a, it's a case of - Such an effect

00:50:33.610 --> 00:50:37.090
to the woman. Yes. And it just is so obvious

00:50:37.090 --> 00:50:39.920
that people are like - they can only see the

00:50:39.920 --> 00:50:42.280
world from their perspective. Like grandma and

00:50:42.280 --> 00:50:44.599
grandpa, they just got two new grandchildren,

00:50:45.099 --> 00:50:46.980
right? So in their mind, how do they even separate

00:50:46.980 --> 00:50:49.000
this 16 -year -old, 14 -year -old girl that are

00:50:49.000 --> 00:50:51.840
their grandchildren from their son and their

00:50:51.840 --> 00:50:54.500
other grandchildren from their son that are now

00:50:54.500 --> 00:50:56.760
brand new? In their mind, they're thinking, these

00:50:56.760 --> 00:50:59.360
kids could get just thrown to the wolves. You

00:50:59.360 --> 00:51:01.739
could understand why they would be like, no,

00:51:01.860 --> 00:51:04.199
don't let that happen. They also live in assisted

00:51:04.199 --> 00:51:06.320
living, so they're not capable of taking care

00:51:06.320 --> 00:51:09.480
of themselves. let alone taking care of the two

00:51:09.480 --> 00:51:12.900
new babies. But it is still left up. I forgot

00:51:12.900 --> 00:51:14.960
about that. It's not cool that they're like,

00:51:15.099 --> 00:51:17.400
yeah, you guys move your rooms in together. Your

00:51:17.400 --> 00:51:19.519
guys' lives are going to change because these

00:51:19.519 --> 00:51:23.500
babies, it just is glaringly obvious that they're

00:51:23.500 --> 00:51:25.599
just seeing it from their own perspective. Right.

00:51:25.739 --> 00:51:29.559
Well, I even get like sitting down and discussing

00:51:29.559 --> 00:51:31.619
it and being like here's our point of view we

00:51:31.619 --> 00:51:33.219
understand your point of view these aren't your

00:51:33.219 --> 00:51:35.320
kids these aren't but like please these are our

00:51:35.320 --> 00:51:36.960
grandchildren they're brand new babies please

00:51:36.960 --> 00:51:38.780
we want we don't want to be separated from them

00:51:38.780 --> 00:51:41.280
but at the end of the day we recognize it's not

00:51:41.280 --> 00:51:43.920
our call to make like that's a situation like

00:51:43.920 --> 00:51:45.880
that conversation like that so the one to be

00:51:45.880 --> 00:51:48.260
like you know i really appreciate you giving

00:51:48.260 --> 00:51:51.039
me like the benefit of the doubt and seeing things

00:51:51.039 --> 00:51:53.139
from my point of view i'm not going to do that

00:51:53.139 --> 00:51:56.769
i'm really sorry but Like if it could have been

00:51:56.769 --> 00:51:58.269
a conversation like that, they probably would

00:51:58.269 --> 00:52:00.550
have still had contact with their two girl grandchildren.

00:52:01.150 --> 00:52:03.389
Yeah. But it's not in the, like, I don't know.

00:52:03.570 --> 00:52:05.250
They made it all about themselves because they

00:52:05.250 --> 00:52:07.289
weren't thinking about like, like the thought

00:52:07.289 --> 00:52:09.650
of like, why would, you know, my daughter -in

00:52:09.650 --> 00:52:11.769
-law want to take care of these babies? Yeah.

00:52:12.010 --> 00:52:15.050
Why wouldn't like, oh, why are the, my two granddaughters

00:52:15.050 --> 00:52:16.730
like, why are they so opposed to something? Like,

00:52:16.730 --> 00:52:18.349
what do you mean? Like their father had just

00:52:18.349 --> 00:52:22.349
died there as he was aggressively divorcing my

00:52:22.349 --> 00:52:25.110
mom and taking it out on all of us. And your

00:52:25.110 --> 00:52:27.250
only thought is, oh, we got new brain kids, though.

00:52:27.269 --> 00:52:28.750
It's just like, they're grieving. They're in

00:52:28.750 --> 00:52:30.449
a horrible state of mind. They were before the

00:52:30.449 --> 00:52:33.590
death and even more after. Yeah. And your only

00:52:33.590 --> 00:52:36.150
thought process is, well, I just want brain kids.

00:52:36.510 --> 00:52:38.849
And the grandparents are also not thinking of

00:52:38.849 --> 00:52:40.650
these twins as well, because their life would

00:52:40.650 --> 00:52:42.849
be horrible. Like, I don't think the mom's not

00:52:42.849 --> 00:52:44.989
a bad person, but also it makes sense why she

00:52:44.989 --> 00:52:47.230
would not give them favorable treatment or anything

00:52:47.230 --> 00:52:49.150
like that, because she didn't want to take them

00:52:49.150 --> 00:52:51.599
in the first place. Yeah. A new home. with like

00:52:51.599 --> 00:52:53.280
the people that want to adopt them, you know,

00:52:53.400 --> 00:52:54.420
people that want to like, yeah, we're gonna be

00:52:54.420 --> 00:52:57.500
good people. Like she should just send them the

00:52:57.500 --> 00:52:59.500
Reddit post, Mick, here's all the comments that

00:52:59.500 --> 00:53:01.699
said, I'll take the babies. Literally, yeah,

00:53:01.760 --> 00:53:03.840
and they post them. She brought receipts to her

00:53:03.840 --> 00:53:07.400
lawyer. Every couple I know that want to adopt

00:53:07.400 --> 00:53:11.820
a baby are just the most loving people and they

00:53:11.820 --> 00:53:16.599
want a baby. And yeah, it's like if I had to

00:53:16.599 --> 00:53:18.860
like give up my child or whatever, my grandkids,

00:53:19.019 --> 00:53:22.380
whatever it may be. Would want I mean I definitely

00:53:22.380 --> 00:53:24.659
would be so grateful for someone that would want

00:53:24.659 --> 00:53:28.000
to adopt them I tried to put myself in the shoes

00:53:28.000 --> 00:53:32.780
of OP Like I imagine if you got pregnant It's

00:53:32.780 --> 00:53:34.400
different because obviously you wouldn't be able

00:53:34.400 --> 00:53:36.139
to hide it like I'd find out when you're pregnant

00:53:36.139 --> 00:53:38.219
Why it's not like you just surprised me with

00:53:38.219 --> 00:53:41.659
twins But there's a part of me that thinks the

00:53:41.659 --> 00:53:44.559
good person in me would want to take care of

00:53:44.559 --> 00:53:47.500
that child But I know on my bad days. I would

00:53:47.500 --> 00:53:50.030
look at that child and just be like whoa Like,

00:53:50.150 --> 00:53:54.849
my wife violated me in the worst way. It's like,

00:53:55.349 --> 00:53:57.469
it's good. It's a good thing that she's not willing

00:53:57.469 --> 00:54:00.570
to take those kids. Yeah, no. Twins, by the way.

00:54:00.969 --> 00:54:04.590
Yes. That's way worse. Yeah. I can't imagine

00:54:04.590 --> 00:54:06.949
having a 16 -year -old and a 14 -year -old daughter

00:54:06.949 --> 00:54:10.170
at the same time, let alone adding two children

00:54:10.170 --> 00:54:12.869
who, we find out, are five months old. Those

00:54:12.869 --> 00:54:14.750
poor children, even if they get adopted into

00:54:14.750 --> 00:54:18.409
the very best home, Their family history they're

00:54:18.409 --> 00:54:19.949
gonna come to find out one day when they get

00:54:19.949 --> 00:54:22.210
curious they find out they're adopted that they

00:54:22.210 --> 00:54:27.630
were born out of a adulterous relationship Both

00:54:27.630 --> 00:54:29.409
of their parents died in a car accident when

00:54:29.409 --> 00:54:33.489
they were babies like that's brutal last update

00:54:33.489 --> 00:54:36.349
There's some good news and some annoying news

00:54:36.349 --> 00:54:39.030
The good news is the boys were safely retrieved

00:54:39.030 --> 00:54:41.389
by CPS from their maternal grandparents and will

00:54:41.389 --> 00:54:44.219
be placed in foster care until a permanent arrangement

00:54:44.219 --> 00:54:46.880
is made. I found out when it happened since their

00:54:46.880 --> 00:54:48.920
grandparents and my mother came to scream at

00:54:48.920 --> 00:54:51.900
me at work. In all honesty, I'm glad this happened

00:54:51.900 --> 00:54:54.260
at work and not at home. It made me consider

00:54:54.260 --> 00:54:56.820
moving since I don't want my daughters exposed

00:54:56.820 --> 00:54:59.400
to any of this. An annoyance I had very soon

00:54:59.400 --> 00:55:02.480
after was getting a call about my inquiries into

00:55:02.480 --> 00:55:04.880
fostering and adopting. Apparently my information

00:55:04.880 --> 00:55:07.840
was sent to CPS as someone interested in fostering

00:55:07.840 --> 00:55:10.769
the twins and eventually adopting. I immediately

00:55:10.769 --> 00:55:12.650
explained the situation between the grandparents

00:55:12.650 --> 00:55:15.329
and me, and the operator was speechless at first.

00:55:15.690 --> 00:55:17.670
She apologized for the situation and told me

00:55:17.670 --> 00:55:19.369
she would make sure I wasn't bothered about the

00:55:19.369 --> 00:55:22.250
process. I also got served this morning. My in

00:55:22.250 --> 00:55:25.710
-laws are suing for grandparents' rights. They

00:55:25.710 --> 00:55:27.989
are also suing for custody. Apparently they are

00:55:27.989 --> 00:55:29.610
planning to leave their assisted living, which

00:55:29.610 --> 00:55:32.050
they really shouldn't, to buy a house that allows

00:55:32.050 --> 00:55:34.750
kids to get the twins back and now also want

00:55:34.750 --> 00:55:38.769
custody of my daughters. What? Like that's a

00:55:38.769 --> 00:55:40.869
thing you old people need to just stay in the

00:55:40.869 --> 00:55:42.610
home and play checkers. Yeah, you're gonna car

00:55:42.610 --> 00:55:49.030
crashes. I think I'm the auto Zoya That is gonna

00:55:49.030 --> 00:55:53.349
be the first thing we do like what selfish grandparents

00:55:53.349 --> 00:55:58.030
this worry Nah, no way no chance and hell that

00:55:58.030 --> 00:56:00.619
goes through That's what these granddaughters

00:56:00.619 --> 00:56:02.619
need, right? Just be fought over again. It's

00:56:02.619 --> 00:56:04.179
like yeah, those girls are just gonna get in

00:56:04.179 --> 00:56:07.340
there and go full crazy mode and just stab the

00:56:07.340 --> 00:56:11.219
grandparents and I mean like really though 14

00:56:11.219 --> 00:56:13.360
and 16 year old grandkids they get ripped away

00:56:13.360 --> 00:56:16.460
from their from their not grandkids daughters.

00:56:16.599 --> 00:56:21.650
I might keep going Yeah, they also want custody

00:56:21.650 --> 00:56:23.989
of my daughters my personal lawyer immediately

00:56:23.989 --> 00:56:26.409
gave me some instructions I won't share to safeguard

00:56:26.409 --> 00:56:28.510
myself and my daughters for some risks during

00:56:28.510 --> 00:56:31.369
a possible custody battle I just cannot imagine

00:56:31.369 --> 00:56:33.449
that she's gonna have to go through a custody

00:56:33.449 --> 00:56:37.969
battle with her dead Cheating ex -husband's parents

00:56:37.969 --> 00:56:43.449
that have to leave assisted living Be so serious

00:56:43.449 --> 00:56:45.690
the judge just has to like see this case and

00:56:45.690 --> 00:56:48.650
just like die laughing right like you're joking

00:56:48.650 --> 00:56:55.699
like what I have no words. It's like the words

00:56:55.699 --> 00:56:58.639
are coming out because I'm so like baffled by

00:56:58.639 --> 00:57:00.599
this situation. Like she had handled it as best

00:57:00.599 --> 00:57:02.860
as she could. Grandparents come in. They're like,

00:57:03.039 --> 00:57:05.059
we're going to destroy your piece. We're going

00:57:05.059 --> 00:57:07.039
to destroy everything that you've tried to work

00:57:07.039 --> 00:57:10.059
for. Like that's crazy to me. So suddenly they

00:57:10.059 --> 00:57:12.139
could take care of the kids suddenly. Wow. I'm

00:57:12.139 --> 00:57:15.000
just like amazing. And just like, Oh, wow. When

00:57:15.000 --> 00:57:16.360
you put in forth the littlest effort, you're

00:57:16.360 --> 00:57:18.639
able to take care of these kids. Wow. Why is

00:57:18.639 --> 00:57:20.340
she going after hers now? I'm just like, leave

00:57:20.340 --> 00:57:22.880
her alone. It's just... It's just leaving the

00:57:22.880 --> 00:57:26.159
assisted living for a few months, so... Assisted

00:57:26.159 --> 00:57:28.079
living, that means they need help with going

00:57:28.079 --> 00:57:30.960
to the bathroom. You're gonna go change diapers

00:57:30.960 --> 00:57:33.179
for the next three years for two kids? The door

00:57:33.179 --> 00:57:35.159
is for kids, yeah, you got this. My lawyer and

00:57:35.159 --> 00:57:38.679
I both suspect my in -laws want the girls to

00:57:38.679 --> 00:57:41.780
parentify them as caretakers for the twins. since

00:57:41.780 --> 00:57:44.559
my in -laws have mobility limitations. It will

00:57:44.559 --> 00:57:46.659
be a cold day in hell before that happens. I

00:57:46.659 --> 00:57:48.960
don't see CPS placing the boys with them to begin

00:57:48.960 --> 00:57:51.679
with. So that's not super clear to me, but I

00:57:51.679 --> 00:57:55.260
think that the grandparents think that the daughters

00:57:55.260 --> 00:57:57.820
will become the caretakers for the children.

00:57:58.179 --> 00:57:59.880
That's what I was going to say is their plan

00:57:59.880 --> 00:58:03.239
to, because they clearly value their new grandbabies

00:58:03.239 --> 00:58:06.420
more than their old grandchildren. That was their

00:58:06.420 --> 00:58:09.239
plan. That's why they're suing for custody. over

00:58:09.239 --> 00:58:11.480
them is so that they can take care of his baby

00:58:11.480 --> 00:58:14.099
because they can't they do is there's disgusting

00:58:14.099 --> 00:58:15.619
yeah the price to take care of the grandparents

00:58:15.619 --> 00:58:17.539
as well think with the honest it's not under

00:58:17.539 --> 00:58:20.880
pressure i see you feel what i said about the

00:58:20.880 --> 00:58:25.519
the girls just it's not that unlikely at this

00:58:25.519 --> 00:58:27.780
point there's no way that case goes through like

00:58:27.780 --> 00:58:31.579
that no way do not you know i'm just going to

00:58:31.579 --> 00:58:33.719
keep reading the same update oh my gosh okay

00:58:33.719 --> 00:58:38.199
so they got custody update my daughters are gone

00:58:38.360 --> 00:58:42.679
Yeah. Not all is bad news. I'm starting therapy

00:58:42.679 --> 00:58:44.840
next week and my oldest daughter is once again

00:58:44.840 --> 00:58:47.440
speaking about the colleges she wants to go to.

00:58:47.559 --> 00:58:49.360
We still haven't really talked about their father

00:58:49.360 --> 00:58:52.059
or have them agree to visit his grave. I myself

00:58:52.059 --> 00:58:53.699
haven't gone there and I'm trying really hard

00:58:53.699 --> 00:58:55.960
to get used to not calling him my husband anymore.

00:58:56.099 --> 00:58:58.280
I had nothing to do with the funeral plans aside

00:58:58.280 --> 00:59:00.599
from paying bills and from what I heard his parents

00:59:00.599 --> 00:59:03.980
had the epitaph, devoted and beloved husband,

00:59:04.059 --> 00:59:06.900
father and son written on it. Are you kidding?

00:59:07.400 --> 00:59:10.760
I find it a joke. I know it's bad to hold so

00:59:10.760 --> 00:59:12.739
much anger and resent, but as soon as I have

00:59:12.739 --> 00:59:15.760
time, I plan to change his tombstone to remove

00:59:15.760 --> 00:59:18.389
husband and father. It might sound petty, but

00:59:18.389 --> 00:59:20.889
I refuse to speak well of a cheater and abuser

00:59:20.889 --> 00:59:22.969
just because he's dead. My daughters deserve

00:59:22.969 --> 00:59:25.369
better and so did I. And for anyone complaining

00:59:25.369 --> 00:59:27.889
about me changing the tombstone, I paid for everything

00:59:27.889 --> 00:59:30.090
at the end. So stick your complaints you know

00:59:30.090 --> 00:59:32.030
where. I don't think I'll post another update

00:59:32.030 --> 00:59:34.010
until the whole mess with the grandparents right

00:59:34.010 --> 00:59:36.190
lawsuit is resolved. So to the kind people that

00:59:36.190 --> 00:59:38.250
have sent support to me and my daughters, thank

00:59:38.250 --> 00:59:40.289
you so much. Maybe I'll have good news in the

00:59:40.289 --> 00:59:42.349
future, but for now I'm going back to my old

00:59:42.349 --> 00:59:45.239
Reddit account. Well... I know that I have been

00:59:45.239 --> 00:59:46.880
looking forward to hearing which one you guys

00:59:46.880 --> 00:59:49.239
think was the fake, so I'm gonna have you guys

00:59:49.239 --> 00:59:51.860
guess now. So first story we had... The guy that

00:59:51.860 --> 00:59:54.039
wore their clothes, right? Yep, first one was

00:59:54.039 --> 00:59:56.960
wear the clothes. My second one was my late husband's

00:59:56.960 --> 00:59:59.179
best friend convinced he's been waiting for me,

00:59:59.400 --> 01:00:01.380
confessed he's been waiting for me. And then

01:00:01.380 --> 01:00:05.099
Joe's was that last story and... The guy that

01:00:05.099 --> 01:00:08.119
steals. The guy that steals all the time. If

01:00:08.119 --> 01:00:10.739
I were to guess one, I would say the one with

01:00:10.739 --> 01:00:14.139
the best friend and the... the dad dying. That's

01:00:14.139 --> 01:00:16.059
the one I would guess. The best friend and the

01:00:16.059 --> 01:00:19.159
dad dying. That would be my guess. Okay, so my

01:00:19.159 --> 01:00:22.219
second story. Yeah, that would be my guess. I

01:00:22.219 --> 01:00:25.880
thought it was maybe the pathological... Stealer?

01:00:25.980 --> 01:00:29.139
Stealer, yeah. Okay, stay tuned for next week

01:00:29.139 --> 01:00:32.610
to hear which one was the fake. Super excited

01:00:32.610 --> 01:00:34.510
for you guys to find out. Comment on our social

01:00:34.510 --> 01:00:37.409
media. Follow us on TikTok, Instagram, Facebook,

01:00:37.869 --> 01:00:40.530
YouTube. We love hearing from you guys. And thank

01:00:40.530 --> 01:00:42.389
you to our podcast listeners. Thanks for the

01:00:42.389 --> 01:00:46.250
five -star ratings, reviews. We love you. We

01:00:46.250 --> 01:00:48.369
appreciate you so much. And thank you guys for

01:00:48.369 --> 01:00:52.889
joining us. It has been a bust up. In and out

01:00:52.889 --> 01:00:57.829
frenzy on three. One, two, three. Love you guys.

01:00:58.289 --> 01:01:12.860
Bye. Click no pretending