1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:07,440
This might sound weird or crazy, but it's extremely validating and it works.

2
00:00:12,800 --> 00:00:18,240
Hello! Welcome back to yourself. My name is Sheer and I'm so happy you are here.

3
00:00:18,800 --> 00:00:24,160
This is the podcast where we listen to the voice of our higher self rather than the voice of our ego

4
00:00:24,160 --> 00:00:29,840
and lead from love rather than fear. So let's get into it. Today we are talking about how

5
00:00:29,840 --> 00:00:36,560
to relieve anxiety immediately. First things first, I am not a therapist. I am just a girl with

6
00:00:36,560 --> 00:00:46,000
anxiety and anxiety is not all of you. Anxiety is a part of you and you do have the power to shift

7
00:00:46,560 --> 00:00:52,800
your mindset and your thoughts every second of the day actually. You have the power to shift

8
00:00:52,800 --> 00:00:58,160
your thoughts whenever you want, whenever you are ready. I'm going to walk you through some

9
00:00:58,160 --> 00:01:04,240
techniques and tools that I have learned from therapy as well as from podcasts that I listen

10
00:01:04,240 --> 00:01:11,360
to about the subject. So let's start with physical resets. First thing you need to know

11
00:01:11,360 --> 00:01:18,640
is anxiety is your body trying to protect you. Anxiety is a fight or flight response

12
00:01:19,280 --> 00:01:26,480
that is trying to protect you from some kind of perceived danger. This is left over from when we

13
00:01:26,480 --> 00:01:33,520
were getting chased by animals and now this can be triggered by something as small as a question like

14
00:01:34,320 --> 00:01:42,480
can we talk or something as big as like big T trauma, whatever that may be. It can also be

15
00:01:42,480 --> 00:01:49,120
triggered by something that reminds you of a big trauma that you've been through but in the moment

16
00:01:49,120 --> 00:01:56,080
you do have the power to physically reset your body and when we physically calm down our body

17
00:01:56,080 --> 00:02:01,520
it can signal to our brain that we are not in a threatening situation. When we are in a threatening

18
00:02:01,520 --> 00:02:08,000
situation we feel it physically like our heart starts beating faster, our breath starts getting

19
00:02:08,000 --> 00:02:14,720
shorter and our palms can start sweating, we can also freeze up and the first thing we can do is

20
00:02:14,720 --> 00:02:22,560
start releasing the tension in our body and deepen our breathing and slow our heart rate. So first

21
00:02:22,560 --> 00:02:29,040
thing that I like to check in with is my tongue. A lot of times when I'm stressed I notice that my

22
00:02:29,040 --> 00:02:36,480
jaw is clenched and my tongue is on the roof of my mouth. So first thing I will do is check in with

23
00:02:36,480 --> 00:02:44,880
my jaw and tongue and release the tension in my jaw. Next thing I will do is if I'm hunched over I

24
00:02:44,880 --> 00:02:50,800
will bring my chest back up. I will open it back up because when we get anxious we can become like

25
00:02:50,800 --> 00:02:57,840
a small little ball to protect ourselves so when we open our bodies it's signaling to our brain

26
00:02:57,840 --> 00:03:05,280
that we are not in a threatening situation. Next is breathing. So as I mentioned our breaths can

27
00:03:05,280 --> 00:03:10,720
get shorter when we are in danger and there are two main breathing techniques I use to reset my

28
00:03:10,720 --> 00:03:18,400
breathing. So if I'm very activated like above a five on a scale of one to ten I go to the breathing

29
00:03:18,400 --> 00:03:37,280
reset which is two sniffs through the nose hold for four seconds and then exhale for seven seconds.

30
00:03:37,280 --> 00:03:44,560
Okay we can do that at least twice but you can do it as many times as you need. Sometimes when

31
00:03:44,560 --> 00:03:51,280
I'm very activated I will put on a stopwatch to make sure that I am doing this breathing reset for

32
00:03:51,280 --> 00:03:57,600
at least one minute but it would be better to do it for maybe three to five even if I'm that activated

33
00:03:57,600 --> 00:04:05,600
but that is the physiological breathing reset and it helps our bodies slow our breathing down.

34
00:04:05,600 --> 00:04:12,160
Once I am activated under a five I go back to belly breathing. This is when you inhale through

35
00:04:12,160 --> 00:04:17,120
the nose when we inhale we're going to breathe into the belly let's inhale for four

36
00:04:20,880 --> 00:04:21,600
hold for four

37
00:04:25,520 --> 00:04:26,560
exhale for eight

38
00:04:34,560 --> 00:04:41,120
and this can be done for as long as I am present until I get distracted and again I can use a

39
00:04:41,120 --> 00:04:48,000
stopwatch for this one just to make sure that I stay in this space of intentionally belly breathing

40
00:04:48,000 --> 00:04:53,520
for at least a minute better to do it for three to five minutes. Another thing you can do physically

41
00:04:53,520 --> 00:04:59,840
is hold ice this is going to reset your vagus nerve which runs down the middle of your body

42
00:04:59,840 --> 00:05:07,200
and it's what gets activated when you are in fight or flight response. So holding ice can help calm

43
00:05:07,200 --> 00:05:12,800
your vagus nerve and signal to your brain that you are not in a threatening situation. When we do get

44
00:05:12,800 --> 00:05:20,160
threatened another thing that can happen is our body creates heat and if we hold cold it's signaling

45
00:05:20,160 --> 00:05:27,200
to our brain that we are not under threat. Another thing I like to do is alternate tapping. You might

46
00:05:27,200 --> 00:05:31,920
have heard of the butterfly technique where you cross your hands on your chest making a butterfly

47
00:05:31,920 --> 00:05:38,800
shape and you alternate tapping the fingers on your chest. This helps in two ways. Number one this

48
00:05:38,800 --> 00:05:43,760
can take you out of your head and into your body because you are physically tapping on your body.

49
00:05:43,760 --> 00:05:50,000
Another thing it does is use both sides of your brain to help your brain process faster and help

50
00:05:50,000 --> 00:05:58,000
you get out of this activated state faster. Another physical reset is to physically move. If I can't

51
00:05:58,000 --> 00:06:04,800
go for a walk or go for a workout because that can be asking a lot of myself in an activated state

52
00:06:04,800 --> 00:06:13,120
to go for a workout. So something that I can do that's very easy is do a quick set of mountain

53
00:06:13,120 --> 00:06:20,080
climbers or burpees or jumping jacks or if you are in the mood you can dance like they do in

54
00:06:20,080 --> 00:06:26,960
Grey's Anatomy. You just need to move. Move your body get out of your head and into your body and

55
00:06:26,960 --> 00:06:33,600
let the emotions come up and out of you. We don't want them to be trapped. Trauma gets out of your

56
00:06:33,600 --> 00:06:39,840
body through movement so move your body. Even when it's the last thing you want to do do three

57
00:06:39,840 --> 00:06:46,080
jumping jacks. Just move. Your body may not want to do it because it thinks you are under threat

58
00:06:46,080 --> 00:06:54,080
but if you know that you are not under threat try to push past that and move your body to show

59
00:06:54,080 --> 00:06:59,600
your body that you are not in a threatening situation. Everything is okay. This is just anxiety

60
00:07:00,160 --> 00:07:06,960
and we are moving this emotion out of our body. So those were some physical interventions we can do

61
00:07:06,960 --> 00:07:16,000
to get out of our heads and into our body when we feel anxiety. Next is the mental interventions

62
00:07:16,000 --> 00:07:25,200
and these arguably are harder. When we do have big emotions we need to feel them. You need to

63
00:07:25,200 --> 00:07:33,920
feel it to heal it and release it and if you don't they will stay stuck in your body until they are

64
00:07:33,920 --> 00:07:41,600
acknowledged, felt and released. The emotions are always there to teach you something. This concept

65
00:07:41,600 --> 00:07:50,320
comes from Abraham Hicks book The Power of Emotions. Let your feelings be your guide. Your feelings

66
00:07:51,040 --> 00:07:58,960
are teaching you something and you can always shift them from going upstream against the current

67
00:07:58,960 --> 00:08:06,800
to downstream with the current. Let me give you an example. Let's say at work you have just seen a

68
00:08:06,800 --> 00:08:12,240
meeting put on your calendar with no context and you are afraid you're going to get fired.

69
00:08:13,040 --> 00:08:18,000
Your first thought could be wow this meeting came out of nowhere. I have no context. I'm

70
00:08:18,000 --> 00:08:23,680
definitely getting fired. That is a very upstream thought. It does not feel good in your body

71
00:08:24,480 --> 00:08:32,080
and it creates more anxiety. So what can this feeling be telling us? This feeling can tell us

72
00:08:32,080 --> 00:08:38,320
that you care about your job. This feeling can tell us that you care about security and money

73
00:08:38,320 --> 00:08:44,080
and a study paycheck. This feeling can tell us that you like your job. Now we go into how we can

74
00:08:44,080 --> 00:08:50,000
shift this thought from going upstream to downstream. Just little by little. It doesn't have to be a

75
00:08:50,000 --> 00:08:57,120
180 shift but let's just start turning it. So the first thought was I'm probably going to get fired

76
00:08:57,120 --> 00:09:02,800
because this meeting was put on my calendar without any context. The next thought could be this meeting

77
00:09:02,800 --> 00:09:08,960
was put on my calendar without any context. I don't know what it's about and everything might be okay.

78
00:09:08,960 --> 00:09:14,480
That thought could feel a little better. Let's try to shift it again. This meeting was put on my

79
00:09:14,480 --> 00:09:21,200
calendar without any context. That's a fact. I don't know what it's about but I know that I can

80
00:09:21,200 --> 00:09:27,200
handle whatever happens. That thought can feel even better and that thought can be empowering

81
00:09:27,760 --> 00:09:33,600
and now we're shifting our thought from I'm definitely getting fired to I can handle whatever

82
00:09:33,600 --> 00:09:39,760
happens and we've shifted from going upstream against the current to downstream with the current

83
00:09:40,320 --> 00:09:46,960
because we cannot control what happens to us. We can only control how we react to it

84
00:09:46,960 --> 00:09:57,600
and that is empowering to remember that. Becoming aware of the feeling is so impactful. When you can

85
00:09:58,160 --> 00:10:06,240
acknowledge the feeling, sit with it and let it come up and speak to you, that is incredibly impactful.

86
00:10:06,240 --> 00:10:13,760
So this process I learned in therapy on how to notice and acknowledge and listen to your feelings.

87
00:10:13,760 --> 00:10:20,960
First, check in with your body and notice where in your body this feeling is coming up. Can you name

88
00:10:20,960 --> 00:10:30,480
it? Where is it in your body? Does it have a shape? Does it have a color? Does it have a texture?

89
00:10:31,680 --> 00:10:39,440
Rate the intensity of this feeling from one to ten and then ask this feeling what is it trying to

90
00:10:39,440 --> 00:10:45,680
tell you? Notice anything that comes to your mind when you ask this question. Don't overthink it,

91
00:10:45,680 --> 00:10:52,000
don't dismiss it. When you ask this question, just notice what comes to your mind.

92
00:10:53,600 --> 00:10:59,680
Then you can ask yourself, is this answer true? Where did this thought come from?

93
00:11:01,520 --> 00:11:09,200
When was the first time you had this thought? How old do you feel? From here you can start

94
00:11:09,200 --> 00:11:16,800
tapping on the anxiety or the feeling. So you've rated the feeling intensity from one to ten

95
00:11:17,520 --> 00:11:24,560
and now you can start tapping on it. So tapping refers to EFT tapping. This stands for emotional

96
00:11:24,560 --> 00:11:30,720
freedom technique. You tap on these meridian points on your body starting with where your

97
00:11:30,720 --> 00:11:41,440
brows meet your nose, on the side of your eyes, under your eyes, between your nose and mouth,

98
00:11:43,840 --> 00:11:50,080
under your mouth, on your chest and the collarbone area,

99
00:11:50,080 --> 00:11:59,840
on top of your head. You can also use the karate chop point on the outside of your hand.

100
00:12:01,280 --> 00:12:08,000
So you have the options to go through these points every time you speak and validate your

101
00:12:08,000 --> 00:12:17,760
feelings and challenge them and then note what you would rather feel. Or if you prefer to stay

102
00:12:17,760 --> 00:12:25,520
in one spot, you can do that as well. I suggest you rate your feeling intensity before you begin

103
00:12:25,520 --> 00:12:32,640
tapping, tap through the points, validate your feelings, ask yourself if this is true,

104
00:12:34,160 --> 00:12:40,560
answer those questions. Where did this thought come from? How old do I feel? When was the first

105
00:12:40,560 --> 00:12:47,040
time I had this thought? Then continue and speak of what you would rather be feeling or what you

106
00:12:47,040 --> 00:12:55,120
are ready to feel. And when you are done tapping, sit with yourself, take a breath, and rate the

107
00:12:55,120 --> 00:13:01,600
intensity of the feeling again on a scale of one to ten. If it dropped even one point, you've made

108
00:13:01,600 --> 00:13:09,520
progress. Even just going through the tapping alone is making progress. Even just acknowledging the

109
00:13:09,520 --> 00:13:15,920
feeling alone, naming it in your body, all of this, everything you are doing right now is making

110
00:13:15,920 --> 00:13:23,600
progress. Now another technique that I learned from a podcast episode is to journal to your anxiety.

111
00:13:23,600 --> 00:13:31,120
At the beginning of the episode, I talked about how anxiety is a part of us, not all of us.

112
00:13:31,120 --> 00:13:36,400
Anxiety is a part of you, not all of you. Similar to the movie Inside Out where they have

113
00:13:36,400 --> 00:13:42,480
separate feelings that all are in Riley, your anxiety is a feeling that is a part of you. It

114
00:13:42,480 --> 00:13:50,560
is not all of you. You also have security that is a part of you. And you can listen to anxiety

115
00:13:50,560 --> 00:13:59,520
and choose to listen to security. Anxiety being a protector part comes from Dick Schwartz's IFS

116
00:13:59,520 --> 00:14:05,920
Internal Family Systems Therapy concept. And this talks about how we are made up of parts.

117
00:14:05,920 --> 00:14:13,920
And these parts include protector parts such as anxiety that are trying to protect us from

118
00:14:13,920 --> 00:14:21,920
danger, from feeling big feelings. And they are there for a purpose. And they are also not the

119
00:14:21,920 --> 00:14:31,120
only parts we have. So when I do feel anxiety, I like to journal to anxiety and thank it for

120
00:14:31,120 --> 00:14:38,160
trying to protect me. And I let it know I'm ready for you to step aside so I can listen to calm and

121
00:14:38,160 --> 00:14:45,120
secure. Or whatever feeling I would rather be experiencing. Then I let the feeling that I prefer

122
00:14:45,120 --> 00:14:51,120
to experience speak up and I journal what that feeling is saying. And then I make a choice to

123
00:14:51,120 --> 00:14:58,240
listen to that feeling that I prefer to experience. Now this takes time. This might sound weird or

124
00:14:58,240 --> 00:15:08,240
crazy, but it's extremely validating and it works. Our feelings just want to be validated. Our feelings come up for a reason.

125
00:15:08,240 --> 00:15:16,240
Whether they are there to protect us or encourage us. Our feelings are always coming up for a reason.

126
00:15:16,240 --> 00:15:26,240
And anxiety is trying to serve a purpose. So when we let our anxiety speak up and listen to what it is trying to protect us from,

127
00:15:26,240 --> 00:15:34,240
this gives us valuable information on how we move forward. And it also gives us information about what we care about.

128
00:15:34,240 --> 00:15:46,240
Now you should be so proud of yourself for listening to this episode, for even considering sitting with your feelings and showing up for yourself.

129
00:15:46,240 --> 00:15:57,240
And with that, thank you so much for listening to this episode, showing up for yourself and being open to trying new tools to relieve your anxiety.

130
00:15:57,240 --> 00:16:05,240
You can reach out to me on Instagram at BackToYourselfPod. Let me know what you thought of this episode and what you want to hear about next.

131
00:16:05,240 --> 00:16:17,240
And I hope you go do something fun for yourself today. Bye!