1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:06,000 Bisexual coffee. It's only $7. It won't break the bank! 2 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:11,000 Sexual coffee. It's only $7. 3 00:00:14,000 --> 00:00:19,000 Sitting sip your cup. Share both your joy and hollers. 4 00:00:19,000 --> 00:00:22,000 Stay and drink your brew. Let's spill your tea. 5 00:00:22,000 --> 00:00:31,000 You might be the asshole or a store teller like me. 6 00:00:31,000 --> 00:00:39,000 Small town cafe with secrets blend with steam. 7 00:00:39,000 --> 00:00:48,000 Voices rise and fall like rivers in a dream. 8 00:00:48,000 --> 00:00:53,000 From heart breaks to triumphs, sales unfold. 9 00:00:53,000 --> 00:00:57,000 Speak your truth. Let your courage be bold. 10 00:00:57,000 --> 00:01:01,000 Stay awhile. Let your heart unwind. 11 00:01:01,000 --> 00:01:04,000 This corner booth piece you'll find. 12 00:01:04,000 --> 00:01:08,000 Whether you're the robor, say so tall. 13 00:01:08,000 --> 00:01:27,000 In the warmth of coffee there's room for all. 14 00:01:27,000 --> 00:01:31,000 Oh, there's a naughty reddit. There's a Christmas naughty reddit. 15 00:01:31,000 --> 00:01:37,000 There's so much reddit out there. So this could be cut into it or it could just be cold open. I'm fine with that. 16 00:01:37,000 --> 00:01:42,000 So there's this little birdie app. Not a sponsor. Could sponsor me if they want to. It's called Finch. 17 00:01:42,000 --> 00:01:48,000 And every time I do something, I tell my little birdie, it's like, I did this. I did my exercise. I drank my water today. 18 00:01:48,000 --> 00:01:51,000 I took my pills. I gave my cat pills. Like, you give it the list. 19 00:01:51,000 --> 00:01:55,000 And then it gives you suggestions on what you want to do because of why you're there. 20 00:01:55,000 --> 00:02:01,000 And some of the suggestions that it's given me is like, do five push-ups a day. Do five jumping jacks. 21 00:02:01,000 --> 00:02:08,000 And for somebody who hasn't done a lot of exercising, that's a good start. And everything you do gives the birdie experience. 22 00:02:08,000 --> 00:02:13,000 And then the birdie grows up from the baby bird to a toddler bird to a teenage bird to an adult bird. 23 00:02:13,000 --> 00:02:16,000 Oh, that's really nice. Send me that app. 24 00:02:16,000 --> 00:02:22,000 And you get to dress it up and you get to... It's stupid cute and I love it. 25 00:02:22,000 --> 00:02:29,000 I used to do that too. There was a fitness app on my Apple Watch and I started out using that. 26 00:02:29,000 --> 00:02:38,000 But now I do it so it's like a routine. I get up. That's the first thing I do is I go to the gym because my diabetes, man. 27 00:02:38,000 --> 00:02:49,000 If I don't go, then it's like, I'll eat something and then my blood sugar, it's like a whole... For me, it's a whole cycle. 28 00:02:49,000 --> 00:02:58,000 So if I go a couple of days without working out and then I eat, let's say I eat a cookie or something like that, it really makes me sick. 29 00:02:58,000 --> 00:03:13,000 But if I'm working out and lifting weights and riding my bike and I can have a cookie with my salad and my juice and things like that, it doesn't affect my blood sugar as bad. 30 00:03:13,000 --> 00:03:20,000 Yeah, you see, I've heard of that about people like actually making you feel bad. 31 00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:28,000 For me, it's not... What my diabetes is doing is that it's just not using the sugar I'm putting into it. 32 00:03:28,000 --> 00:03:33,000 And so to get energy, it saps it from my body and I can really... 33 00:03:33,000 --> 00:03:35,000 Yeah, that's exactly what happens. 34 00:03:35,000 --> 00:03:46,000 So, it helps the body use the sugar before it can start doing that and I'm up to... Unbidden, I'm up to 15 jumping jacks over just the last week 35 00:03:46,000 --> 00:03:50,000 and then up to doing 18 push-ups, which I hate push-ups. I've always hated push-ups. 36 00:03:50,000 --> 00:03:52,000 But you can do them? 37 00:03:52,000 --> 00:03:57,000 Yeah. See, that's amazing. I can't and I exercise every day. 38 00:03:57,000 --> 00:04:01,000 Well, I don't want to say I can't. I will in the future. How about that? 39 00:04:01,000 --> 00:04:03,000 Potentially, I will. 40 00:04:03,000 --> 00:04:09,000 So what brings me joy out of that? Seeing that little baby bird turn into a toddler bird because I'm taking care of myself. 41 00:04:09,000 --> 00:04:15,000 So, welcome to Bisexual Coffee People where it's only $7 and it won't break the bank. 42 00:04:15,000 --> 00:04:19,000 It's only $7 and it won't break the bank. 43 00:04:19,000 --> 00:04:22,000 And of course, that's Edith. I say hi Edith. 44 00:04:22,000 --> 00:04:24,000 Hi, it's Edith. 45 00:04:24,000 --> 00:04:29,000 It is Edith. And it's me. It's me, Michael. We're here. We're waiting for our guests. Our guests should show up. 46 00:04:29,000 --> 00:04:34,000 People are busy. We understand that not everybody can show up on time and, well, Dagnav it. 47 00:04:34,000 --> 00:04:38,000 We wanted to be here with you and talk a little bit about the joy during the holidays. 48 00:04:38,000 --> 00:04:40,000 Maybe tell some crazy holiday stories. 49 00:04:40,000 --> 00:04:41,000 Yeah. 50 00:04:41,000 --> 00:04:43,000 I'm excited about it. 51 00:04:43,000 --> 00:04:49,000 Tell me about your best Christmas. Tell me about your most fun, happiest Christmas. 52 00:04:49,000 --> 00:04:51,000 I've had a lot of good... 53 00:04:51,000 --> 00:04:54,000 Hello, non-binary Sydney. Hello, baby. 54 00:04:54,000 --> 00:04:56,000 Sydney. 55 00:04:56,000 --> 00:04:57,000 How are you? 56 00:04:57,000 --> 00:04:59,000 Happy holidays, baby. 57 00:04:59,000 --> 00:05:00,000 How are you? 58 00:05:00,000 --> 00:05:05,000 I love the hat. I love the hat. I was hoping one of us would have a Santa hat. I didn't have one laying around. 59 00:05:05,000 --> 00:05:08,000 I don't have one, but I've got this. Hold on. 60 00:05:08,000 --> 00:05:11,000 I do have a Christmas tree headband I could put on, I suppose. 61 00:05:11,000 --> 00:05:13,000 I got something. Hold on. 62 00:05:13,000 --> 00:05:14,000 Okay. 63 00:05:14,000 --> 00:05:15,000 Watch. 64 00:05:15,000 --> 00:05:16,000 While she transforms. 65 00:05:16,000 --> 00:05:17,000 I love this hat. 66 00:05:17,000 --> 00:05:19,000 Sydney, where did your camera go? 67 00:05:19,000 --> 00:05:20,000 Oh, my camera's gone. 68 00:05:20,000 --> 00:05:21,000 Here you are. 69 00:05:21,000 --> 00:05:23,000 What do you think? Hello, my name is Edith. 70 00:05:23,000 --> 00:05:24,000 I love it. 71 00:05:24,000 --> 00:05:26,000 I love it. 72 00:05:26,000 --> 00:05:28,000 Please do your cosmetics. 73 00:05:28,000 --> 00:05:29,000 Yes. 74 00:05:29,000 --> 00:05:31,000 I got a pretty for the prettys. 75 00:05:31,000 --> 00:05:32,000 I love it. 76 00:05:32,000 --> 00:05:35,000 I got one from work and voice therapy and all that other stuff. 77 00:05:35,000 --> 00:05:36,000 Excellent. 78 00:05:36,000 --> 00:05:44,000 It's like the princess and the frog where she just takes that giant puff and just hits her face once and she's fine. 79 00:05:44,000 --> 00:05:45,000 Yeah. 80 00:05:45,000 --> 00:05:46,000 I love that. 81 00:05:46,000 --> 00:05:49,000 I like the nail cala too, honey. It's fabulous. 82 00:05:49,000 --> 00:05:50,000 Thank you. 83 00:05:50,000 --> 00:05:51,000 Yeah. 84 00:05:51,000 --> 00:05:52,000 And that's just the hair. 85 00:05:52,000 --> 00:05:54,000 And the hair. 86 00:05:54,000 --> 00:05:55,000 Awesome. 87 00:05:55,000 --> 00:05:59,000 So I have a couple of different calibers of what I consider to be my best Christmas. 88 00:05:59,000 --> 00:06:00,000 Okay. 89 00:06:00,000 --> 00:06:02,000 Hold on. Make sure I'm okay. 90 00:06:02,000 --> 00:06:10,000 Okay. So my best Christmas would be when I was a kid was when my parents were selling weed and boy, did they have the money. 91 00:06:10,000 --> 00:06:13,000 Not only did they have a nine to five, but they're also selling weed on top of it. 92 00:06:13,000 --> 00:06:15,000 And I didn't know any of that. 93 00:06:15,000 --> 00:06:18,000 I just thought they were doing really good at the Felt factory in Walmart. 94 00:06:18,000 --> 00:06:21,000 You know, I thought like they were just top of their class. 95 00:06:21,000 --> 00:06:27,000 And they got me like, this is, this is when I get addicted to video games. 96 00:06:27,000 --> 00:06:35,000 They get me a mountain, like a variable like pyramid of toys on top of the living room table that will not fit underneath the tree. 97 00:06:35,000 --> 00:06:37,000 And I just tautle into the room. 98 00:06:37,000 --> 00:06:39,000 Obviously gifts are there. 99 00:06:39,000 --> 00:06:43,000 We had great meals like my parents were still about like cooking like awesome food. 100 00:06:43,000 --> 00:06:45,000 The breakfast was tight. 101 00:06:45,000 --> 00:06:46,000 Gifts were tight. 102 00:06:46,000 --> 00:06:55,000 And then the Nintendo entertainment system came into my life at Christmas, complete with Super Mario 3, Super Mario 1 and Sky Shark, 103 00:06:55,000 --> 00:07:00,000 which was me and my dad's favorite game to play until Contra came out. 104 00:07:00,000 --> 00:07:03,000 I don't know if anybody here knows anything about NES. 105 00:07:03,000 --> 00:07:04,000 Contra was a... 106 00:07:04,000 --> 00:07:05,000 It me does. I don't. 107 00:07:05,000 --> 00:07:08,000 Contra was top tier shooting games. Absolutely. 108 00:07:08,000 --> 00:07:15,000 That was really good for my kid Christmas for my, for my adult Christmas. 109 00:07:15,000 --> 00:07:20,000 I'd probably have to say the best one that I've had because I had a lot of good ones. 110 00:07:20,000 --> 00:07:24,000 I've had some of that just kind of passed me by just because like maybe I had to work or something that day. 111 00:07:24,000 --> 00:07:27,000 Because I've had had a couple of jobs that work on Christmas Day. 112 00:07:27,000 --> 00:07:32,000 But I would say it would be the first time that I got with the in-laws in my current marriage. 113 00:07:32,000 --> 00:07:35,000 We all went up there to Blairsville. I'm so nervous. 114 00:07:35,000 --> 00:07:36,000 The in-laws. 115 00:07:36,000 --> 00:07:38,000 Yeah, I had no idea what to expect. 116 00:07:38,000 --> 00:07:39,000 You hear in-laws. 117 00:07:39,000 --> 00:07:43,000 In-laws has such a stigma surrounding it, just the word in-laws. 118 00:07:43,000 --> 00:07:44,000 I go up there. 119 00:07:44,000 --> 00:07:46,000 The cabin is cozy. 120 00:07:46,000 --> 00:07:48,000 It's filled full of people. 121 00:07:48,000 --> 00:07:51,000 They had gotten nothing but good words from me, from my wife. 122 00:07:51,000 --> 00:07:54,000 So they're ready to just say hello. 123 00:07:54,000 --> 00:08:00,000 And I didn't realize how warm that hello was going to be and how family like, like, 124 00:08:00,000 --> 00:08:05,000 I'm not going to say storybook family, but it's one of the best family dynamics that I've ever. 125 00:08:05,000 --> 00:08:06,000 Welcoming. 126 00:08:06,000 --> 00:08:07,000 Yeah. 127 00:08:07,000 --> 00:08:11,000 And so that Christmas, I just sat in there and somebody, you know, everybody had a stocking. 128 00:08:11,000 --> 00:08:12,000 We all sat around. 129 00:08:12,000 --> 00:08:14,000 People were getting drunk off their ass. 130 00:08:14,000 --> 00:08:19,000 It was just, it was just a fun time with a whole bunch of strangers that made me feel so much like not a stranger. 131 00:08:19,000 --> 00:08:21,000 They pulled me in instantly. 132 00:08:21,000 --> 00:08:23,000 So that was how it would be my... 133 00:08:23,000 --> 00:08:25,000 So the Nintendo was the best gift? 134 00:08:25,000 --> 00:08:27,000 Is that what's going to be my next question? 135 00:08:27,000 --> 00:08:29,000 Sydney, you've got to answer that. 136 00:08:29,000 --> 00:08:32,000 It was definitely the most life-shaping gift. 137 00:08:32,000 --> 00:08:38,000 If I hadn't got that Nintendo when I did, would I still, would I make sure that I had a gaming system, 138 00:08:38,000 --> 00:08:42,000 some kind of gaming system in my life at that point every year? 139 00:08:42,000 --> 00:08:46,000 No, I don't know if I would, but it definitely was the most life-shaping gift. 140 00:08:46,000 --> 00:08:49,000 It's hard to say what the best gift was, but I don't know. 141 00:08:49,000 --> 00:08:51,000 I also have a horrible memory for that. 142 00:08:51,000 --> 00:08:53,000 So it's Sydney's turn to recount things. 143 00:08:53,000 --> 00:08:54,000 My turn. 144 00:08:54,000 --> 00:08:57,000 Okay, so favorite Christmas and then best gift? 145 00:08:57,000 --> 00:08:58,000 Yeah. 146 00:08:58,000 --> 00:09:04,000 My favorite Christmas as a kid was probably when, probably say when we first got our first NES too. 147 00:09:04,000 --> 00:09:07,000 Like I'm going to have to, I'm going to have to follow you on that one. 148 00:09:07,000 --> 00:09:11,000 Because like me and my brother, like I remember like Christmas Eve and stuff. 149 00:09:11,000 --> 00:09:16,000 We'd always replay the nativity scene and stuff when I was a kid and one of us had to play Mary. 150 00:09:16,000 --> 00:09:20,000 The other one had to play Joseph, of course, you know, which one always. 151 00:09:20,000 --> 00:09:25,000 And we got to open one present every year as kids. 152 00:09:25,000 --> 00:09:29,000 And the one present that we picked just happened to be the SNES with Duck Hunt. 153 00:09:29,000 --> 00:09:32,000 We got it taken away because we had to go to sleep for Santa, right? 154 00:09:32,000 --> 00:09:40,000 And we would sneak out that night and we got into so much trouble because we were caught downstairs playing Duck Hunt for hours and hours and hours. 155 00:09:40,000 --> 00:09:44,000 And my parents heard us when they got up at like four o'clock in the morning to put the presents out, right? 156 00:09:44,000 --> 00:09:46,000 So that was probably one of my favorite as a kid. 157 00:09:46,000 --> 00:09:52,000 As an adult, I'd have to say the first Christmas that I had with my daughter and my son. 158 00:09:52,000 --> 00:09:55,000 So that would have been Christmas of 2006. 159 00:09:55,000 --> 00:10:02,000 Just because it was like that's, I don't know if like there's something in me that when I was growing up, that was like the idea of what I really wanted. 160 00:10:02,000 --> 00:10:06,000 Still kind of is like having a family and like we're all together and it was just amazing. 161 00:10:06,000 --> 00:10:14,000 That was just that was probably my most tender one. But my favorite gift ever is actually I wonder if I've got. 162 00:10:14,000 --> 00:10:16,000 I do have it right here. This one. 163 00:10:16,000 --> 00:10:17,000 I still have it. 164 00:10:17,000 --> 00:10:18,000 I do. 165 00:10:18,000 --> 00:10:19,000 Atomic habits. 166 00:10:19,000 --> 00:10:20,000 I had changed clear. 167 00:10:20,000 --> 00:10:21,000 Wow. 168 00:10:21,000 --> 00:10:26,000 My daughter gave me this because like we've been a little bit strange because of my addiction stuff. 169 00:10:26,000 --> 00:10:30,000 But we started talking like before this past Christmas and she's like, what do you want for Christmas? 170 00:10:30,000 --> 00:10:36,000 I was like, I was blown back and I'm like, get me a self help book and she actually spent like a lot of time researching this one. 171 00:10:36,000 --> 00:10:41,000 And so she got me this one and I've read this probably like five, six times so far and it's really helped me out. 172 00:10:41,000 --> 00:10:43,000 And it's really, really something special for me. 173 00:10:43,000 --> 00:10:45,000 So because we're starting to rebuild those communication things. 174 00:10:45,000 --> 00:10:46,000 That's great. 175 00:10:46,000 --> 00:10:54,000 I think I've read that book and it's really good and it's like a blueprint on how to live an impeccable life. 176 00:10:54,000 --> 00:10:55,000 Yeah. 177 00:10:55,000 --> 00:10:56,000 Am I right? 178 00:10:56,000 --> 00:10:57,000 Yeah. 179 00:10:57,000 --> 00:10:58,000 I love that book. 180 00:10:58,000 --> 00:11:01,000 It's an amazing book and I have it on Audible. 181 00:11:01,000 --> 00:11:04,000 So I'll listen to it while I'm in my car. 182 00:11:04,000 --> 00:11:05,000 Yeah. 183 00:11:05,000 --> 00:11:06,000 Nice. 184 00:11:06,000 --> 00:11:10,000 Whereas I am listening to fairy and face might while I'm driving around. 185 00:11:10,000 --> 00:11:13,000 So, you know, teach your own. 186 00:11:13,000 --> 00:11:14,000 Yeah. 187 00:11:14,000 --> 00:11:18,000 You know, well, I have to agree with Sydney there. 188 00:11:18,000 --> 00:11:22,000 I mean, I'm an addict in order to get myself. 189 00:11:22,000 --> 00:11:31,000 I have to travel kind of straight and narrow and I need help being straight and narrow because I'm not really straight and I'm not really narrow. 190 00:11:31,000 --> 00:11:32,000 Yeah. 191 00:11:32,000 --> 00:11:36,000 So I've got like a plethora of those self help books. 192 00:11:36,000 --> 00:11:38,000 But for me, my best Christmas. 193 00:11:38,000 --> 00:11:39,000 Yeah. 194 00:11:39,000 --> 00:11:43,000 My best Christmas was when. 195 00:11:43,000 --> 00:11:50,000 And it's so probably inappropriate, but we would go to a restaurant called Sambo's. 196 00:11:50,000 --> 00:11:52,000 Does anybody remember Sambo's? 197 00:11:52,000 --> 00:11:54,000 Little black Sambo. 198 00:11:54,000 --> 00:11:55,000 No. 199 00:11:55,000 --> 00:12:01,000 There was a restaurant when I was growing up called Sambo's and my mom bought me a tiger. 200 00:12:01,000 --> 00:12:07,000 Then my favorite gift was a tiger from this restaurant and it was underneath the Christmas tree. 201 00:12:07,000 --> 00:12:09,000 I lost my shit. 202 00:12:09,000 --> 00:12:12,000 It was just the coolest tiger ever. 203 00:12:12,000 --> 00:12:15,000 And the story, I can't really remember the story. 204 00:12:15,000 --> 00:12:25,000 It was a little black kid who lives in the jungle and he comes across a tiger and they become friends or something like that. 205 00:12:25,000 --> 00:12:26,000 I don't remember. 206 00:12:26,000 --> 00:12:28,000 So it's not the jungle book. 207 00:12:28,000 --> 00:12:30,000 No, no, no. 208 00:12:30,000 --> 00:12:31,000 It's even older than that. 209 00:12:31,000 --> 00:12:33,000 Look, 55, y'all. 210 00:12:33,000 --> 00:12:36,000 You're just a couple of young ins to me. 211 00:12:36,000 --> 00:12:41,000 I mean, time's relatively than all that, you know, they say that time could just be a ball and it's all happening at once. 212 00:12:41,000 --> 00:12:43,000 And this is the only way we can understand it. 213 00:12:43,000 --> 00:12:44,000 Yeah, totally. 214 00:12:44,000 --> 00:12:45,000 That's it. 215 00:12:45,000 --> 00:12:46,000 Who knows? 216 00:12:46,000 --> 00:12:47,000 Was it a stuffed tiger? 217 00:12:47,000 --> 00:12:48,000 Was it a wooden tiger? 218 00:12:48,000 --> 00:12:49,000 It was a stuffed tiger. 219 00:12:49,000 --> 00:12:50,000 And it came with the book. 220 00:12:50,000 --> 00:12:51,000 It came with the book. 221 00:12:51,000 --> 00:12:57,000 I'll see if I can find it and I'll attach it to this episode, you know, up here somewhere or something. 222 00:12:57,000 --> 00:12:58,000 Sure. 223 00:12:58,000 --> 00:13:01,000 But yeah, that was just hands down the best gift. 224 00:13:01,000 --> 00:13:03,000 The funniest gift. 225 00:13:03,000 --> 00:13:05,000 You guys still have to do the funniest gift. 226 00:13:05,000 --> 00:13:06,000 All right. 227 00:13:06,000 --> 00:13:10,000 So the funniest gift was I was into self-help books even when I was a little kid. 228 00:13:10,000 --> 00:13:11,000 All right. 229 00:13:11,000 --> 00:13:15,000 So I gave my sister like five self-help books. 230 00:13:15,000 --> 00:13:16,000 Oh, wow. 231 00:13:16,000 --> 00:13:17,000 Five. 232 00:13:17,000 --> 00:13:18,000 Yeah. 233 00:13:18,000 --> 00:13:20,000 And she gave me a... 234 00:13:20,000 --> 00:13:29,000 No, if this doesn't scream gay, queer, whatever, I give her these self-help books like, here, you need to come out. 235 00:13:29,000 --> 00:13:32,000 You really need to work on yourself. 236 00:13:32,000 --> 00:13:36,000 She gives me a shirt with an American flag on it. 237 00:13:36,000 --> 00:13:40,000 We were nine, like, nine and 10. 238 00:13:40,000 --> 00:13:41,000 Wow. 239 00:13:41,000 --> 00:13:42,000 Yeah. 240 00:13:42,000 --> 00:13:47,000 So, so bad. 241 00:13:47,000 --> 00:13:51,000 So funniest gift, you say? 242 00:13:51,000 --> 00:13:52,000 Funniest. 243 00:13:52,000 --> 00:13:53,000 I don't know. 244 00:13:53,000 --> 00:13:54,000 I don't... 245 00:13:54,000 --> 00:14:02,000 There hasn't been a lot of, like, gag gifts or gifts that I would have found like, like, oh, this is hilarious. 246 00:14:02,000 --> 00:14:13,000 Like, normally people when they give me gifts, it's always been like, like really good on the utilitarian thing because they realize that I might like look good in a particular jacket or hat. 247 00:14:13,000 --> 00:14:15,000 That's how my in-laws shop. 248 00:14:15,000 --> 00:14:17,000 Marley likes to go straight for the heart. 249 00:14:17,000 --> 00:14:19,000 She bought me a book one time. 250 00:14:19,000 --> 00:14:24,000 He had a book made one time of my travels to California with my brother. 251 00:14:24,000 --> 00:14:30,000 I guess I'm surrounded by sentimental and very practical people. 252 00:14:30,000 --> 00:14:31,000 No, no jokes. 253 00:14:31,000 --> 00:14:32,000 Yeah. 254 00:14:32,000 --> 00:14:33,000 It's not jokes. 255 00:14:33,000 --> 00:14:35,000 It's always like, they're always just gifts. 256 00:14:35,000 --> 00:14:37,000 It's like, oh, you're either going to love this. 257 00:14:37,000 --> 00:14:41,000 This is going to pull in your heartstrings or, damn it, you're going to look dashing in it. 258 00:14:41,000 --> 00:14:43,000 No white elephant party gifts. 259 00:14:43,000 --> 00:14:48,000 The only white elephant party gifts that parties that I've ever been to have been like corporate related. 260 00:14:48,000 --> 00:14:50,000 And so it's, yeah. 261 00:14:50,000 --> 00:15:00,000 So, you know, it's at best maybe PG-13 if the gift is a little risque or funny, but it's all been in the spirit of just like Christmas party. 262 00:15:00,000 --> 00:15:01,000 type situation. 263 00:15:01,000 --> 00:15:05,000 So sorry, sorry to disappoint. 264 00:15:05,000 --> 00:15:06,000 No, that's all right. 265 00:15:06,000 --> 00:15:07,000 Sydney, come on. 266 00:15:07,000 --> 00:15:09,000 Do you have anything like ideal? 267 00:15:09,000 --> 00:15:16,000 So I used to work at and going to give a shout out to an area 51 in Salt Lake City, Utah, got the industrial club. 268 00:15:16,000 --> 00:15:24,000 We got together for our Christmas parties and the one year I got what was it one of those gummy like penis gummy things. 269 00:15:24,000 --> 00:15:30,000 And then also it was like a half a gallon of like lube and I don't know where they got it from. 270 00:15:30,000 --> 00:15:33,000 But those were the those are probably the funniest ones that I've got. 271 00:15:33,000 --> 00:15:34,000 That's a lot of damn. 272 00:15:34,000 --> 00:15:36,000 That is a lot of lube. 273 00:15:36,000 --> 00:15:38,000 I saw that in Key West. 274 00:15:38,000 --> 00:15:47,000 There was a store in Key West where you could buy like a gallon at a time and I'm thinking, oh my God, no, no, no. 275 00:15:47,000 --> 00:15:49,000 The work that it would take. 276 00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:54,000 Yeah, like for for single like let's say let's say you're in a trouble. 277 00:15:54,000 --> 00:16:02,000 Like that's still not enough people for you to justify a gallon of lube before it starts getting like weird by halfway through it. 278 00:16:02,000 --> 00:16:05,000 Like, you know, like maybe some dust to settle in. 279 00:16:05,000 --> 00:16:10,000 Yeah, it's it's just a hair at the top of the bottle. 280 00:16:10,000 --> 00:16:12,000 You're going to have to go to the weekend at a PDD party. 281 00:16:12,000 --> 00:16:13,000 It's fine. 282 00:16:13,000 --> 00:16:14,000 That is true, right? 283 00:16:14,000 --> 00:16:15,000 Good for you. 284 00:16:15,000 --> 00:16:16,000 You beat me to it. 285 00:16:16,000 --> 00:16:21,000 I was going to say like some kind of orgy maybe orchestrated by and then you were like, yep, you're you're in there. 286 00:16:21,000 --> 00:16:22,000 Right in the pocket. 287 00:16:22,000 --> 00:16:23,000 Good job, Sydney. 288 00:16:23,000 --> 00:16:24,000 You did it. 289 00:16:24,000 --> 00:16:27,000 I still haven't watched the documentary guys. 290 00:16:27,000 --> 00:16:28,000 I can't. 291 00:16:28,000 --> 00:16:29,000 Oh, I don't want to. 292 00:16:29,000 --> 00:16:30,000 I can't. 293 00:16:30,000 --> 00:16:31,000 I cannot bring myself to it. 294 00:16:31,000 --> 00:16:33,000 I got enough through my Twitter feed and TikTok stories. 295 00:16:33,000 --> 00:16:34,000 I was like, I'm good. 296 00:16:34,000 --> 00:16:36,000 I don't need to know anything else. 297 00:16:36,000 --> 00:16:38,000 There's a naked holiday Reddit. 298 00:16:38,000 --> 00:16:39,000 I mean, of course there is. 299 00:16:39,000 --> 00:16:42,000 I just I kind of accidentally jumped in there. 300 00:16:42,000 --> 00:16:45,000 You know, they're like, I'm not going to do it. 301 00:16:45,000 --> 00:16:48,000 And they're, you know, they show some, they show things. 302 00:16:48,000 --> 00:16:55,000 Yeah, Reddit is more or less uncensored because like what they'll do is they'll ask a lot of places. 303 00:16:55,000 --> 00:16:58,000 They'll ask us like, Hey, this is probably going to hit somebody's like all feeds. 304 00:16:58,000 --> 00:17:02,000 So at least put like the blur sensor or they can click on it if they want. 305 00:17:02,000 --> 00:17:03,000 Yeah. 306 00:17:03,000 --> 00:17:09,000 In fact, I think probably pound for pound Reddit probably has more porn on it than Tumblr used to back in the day and porn's 307 00:17:09,000 --> 00:17:11,000 getting back on Tumblr now. 308 00:17:11,000 --> 00:17:12,000 But it's nowhere near. 309 00:17:12,000 --> 00:17:14,000 I mean Reddit, you know, it used to be nothing at all for you. 310 00:17:14,000 --> 00:17:18,640 at all for you to just click on there and then it was just boobs, pastics for days. I mean it was just 311 00:17:21,920 --> 00:17:27,600 and I was like I'm so glad this is here. This is not what I'm looking for. Give me the means please. 312 00:17:27,600 --> 00:17:33,120 It wasn't what I was looking for either. I want the means. I was looking Sidney. I was looking for a 313 00:17:33,120 --> 00:17:39,040 funny story but I think do you have one? Do you have one? I mean I definitely have one. Okay. 314 00:17:39,040 --> 00:17:48,480 There are all types of links. This one comes from a post on Ask an American. It was posted 315 00:17:48,480 --> 00:17:53,760 four years ago and it's just let's hear your funniest Christmas stories. It's hard to search for 316 00:17:53,760 --> 00:17:58,400 just like a single story. A lot of times it is asking people to put their stories in the comments 317 00:17:58,400 --> 00:18:05,280 and that's when this one is the top one was not bad. It was not bad at all. A little bit of like 318 00:18:05,280 --> 00:18:09,680 quick trauma for a kid that probably comes and that looks like he just disappears immediately. 319 00:18:09,680 --> 00:18:15,120 My sister and I stayed up really late on Christmas Eve. We removed all of our youngest brothers 320 00:18:15,120 --> 00:18:19,360 presents from under the tree and then we emptied his stocking. We stowed all the presents behind 321 00:18:19,360 --> 00:18:23,600 the couch and we put all of the stocking stuffers in a bag. It was like eight at this time. We 322 00:18:23,600 --> 00:18:28,800 meticulously wrapped and put bows on boxes to him. We filled all of them with charcoal briquettes 323 00:18:28,800 --> 00:18:33,680 and q-tips. Still don't know why we chose q-tips. On Christmas morning he got to go first because 324 00:18:33,680 --> 00:18:38,640 he's the youngest. Torn to his first box and his face just dropped. He went out and turned and 325 00:18:38,640 --> 00:18:43,200 ripped out present number two only to find more coal and q-tips. He ran to the other room where 326 00:18:43,200 --> 00:18:49,360 the stockings were dumped out. It was a plastic bag filled with charcoal and q-tips. He lost it. 327 00:18:49,360 --> 00:18:53,840 My parents had no idea what we had done and I think my dad was ready to just beat us for 328 00:18:53,840 --> 00:18:59,520 ruining Christmas. So my brother finally got uh my brother fatted together and we showed him where 329 00:18:59,520 --> 00:19:04,960 we'd stashed all his toys and he was happy as hell after that. To this day probably 25 years later 330 00:19:04,960 --> 00:19:08,960 I still get called the Christmas Grinch by my whole family. Everyone conveniently forgets how 331 00:19:08,960 --> 00:19:14,640 complicit my sister was in this. Those presents didn't wrap themselves and I suck at wrapping. 332 00:19:14,640 --> 00:19:21,440 Wow. Yeah, little story. Yeah. Is there any that you found Edith? Because if uh if not we can 333 00:19:21,440 --> 00:19:26,320 like discuss these as we go on and I'll just like kind of finish out on this one for a couple more. 334 00:19:26,320 --> 00:19:31,840 I have some experience on Reddit. I'm kind of newish to the whole Reddit thing. Okay. I have a 335 00:19:31,840 --> 00:19:37,680 very different feed because all of my stuff is cooking right now. Oh yeah. Also have like some 336 00:19:37,680 --> 00:19:42,720 like BDSM stuff but you know we're just trying to figure out how to intertwine those. So it's like. 337 00:19:42,720 --> 00:19:47,840 The standard is is like a for you page right? Everything that you've clicked on that you followed 338 00:19:47,840 --> 00:19:52,960 is like okay cool this is what you want more of but if you dare to scroll down to the bottom of 339 00:19:52,960 --> 00:19:58,480 the options of everything else and just click r slash all it's a hot sweaty time in there. Also a 340 00:19:58,480 --> 00:20:03,840 lot of weird. It is a hot sweaty time. A lot of weird political shit too but you know it is what it is. 341 00:20:03,840 --> 00:20:11,120 All right. I can share this on TikTok. Please. I was with not TikTok clapper because when 342 00:20:11,680 --> 00:20:17,760 TikTok was going out you know I guess you know people some people feel like it's not going to 343 00:20:17,760 --> 00:20:23,440 stay and then there's some people that you know doesn't really matter. Well everybody that I know 344 00:20:23,440 --> 00:20:30,480 went over to clapper so I went over to clapper. That thing is dark. There was one episode where 345 00:20:31,040 --> 00:20:39,440 a father wrapped up cat food. His son and had his son unwrap the cat food. Well the little kid 346 00:20:39,440 --> 00:20:44,720 started crying. Well why wouldn't you start crying? Right. I'm not a cat. Why did you do this to me? 347 00:20:44,720 --> 00:20:51,440 I know right. I'm not a cat. That's what I was thinking. We have a lot of the adults that are 348 00:20:51,440 --> 00:20:58,480 what an incredible little boy and that's what I don't like about clapper. Adults tend to forget 349 00:20:58,480 --> 00:21:02,720 what it's like to be a kid to have like the expectation and wonder that something's going 350 00:21:02,720 --> 00:21:08,000 to be like awesome that day and then your rug gets pulled right out from it. It's built up. It's like 351 00:21:08,000 --> 00:21:16,800 you know. So yeah that's again it is just a mark of adults forgetting how to be kids which 352 00:21:16,800 --> 00:21:21,600 sucks you know. You hate to see somebody just become a car mudgeon especially around the end 353 00:21:21,600 --> 00:21:26,960 of the year holidays whether you celebrate Christmas or or Hanukkah or Kwanzaa or you just get 354 00:21:26,960 --> 00:21:31,760 together with family because that's what everybody does. Well I can tell you what I'm doing for 355 00:21:31,760 --> 00:21:40,480 Christmas. I am. I'm working. I'm making $50 an hour working. Yeah that makes sense. Yeah I just 356 00:21:40,480 --> 00:21:46,880 rather work. My company is off for a week and I realized that the closest that we got closer that 357 00:21:46,880 --> 00:21:52,720 we got to it that I wasn't using my pay time off and so it used it to fill out the four-week 358 00:21:52,720 --> 00:21:59,280 work days before then so I've effectively given myself two full weeks off. Merry Christmas to me. 359 00:21:59,280 --> 00:22:06,240 Cool. What about you? What about you? I am going to be sitting around and working all the time. 360 00:22:07,520 --> 00:22:15,040 Yeah me too. But that's okay. I'm happy with it. I'm happy with it. The whole capitalism like my 361 00:22:15,040 --> 00:22:22,560 brother lives in Portland Oregon so I'm going to send them a card and then my roommate is leaving 362 00:22:22,560 --> 00:22:29,440 for a couple of weeks up north so there's that and he'll get his present when you know when he gets 363 00:22:29,440 --> 00:22:36,000 home. That's it. I'm just going to work and sleep and ride my bike and eat too much. And stay away 364 00:22:36,000 --> 00:22:40,880 from stores because those places are going to be a freaking nightmare. Oh yeah no. I got on the road 365 00:22:40,880 --> 00:22:47,680 to go get my cat some food and it's nutty because everybody's out after work shopping. 366 00:22:47,680 --> 00:22:53,520 Yeah. Yeah. Trying to squeeze it in because I don't know if you guys heard this. There's a lot 367 00:22:53,520 --> 00:22:57,840 of retail stores that they're not just leaving it up to their local managers if they're going to 368 00:22:57,840 --> 00:23:04,800 close. They are like mandating a full nationwide closure and that includes I know two of them 369 00:23:04,800 --> 00:23:10,480 right now and I could probably find more but Dollar General which they didn't used to mandate 370 00:23:10,480 --> 00:23:13,840 that all their stores closed but they're doing that this year and Walmart. They're not leaving it 371 00:23:13,840 --> 00:23:18,640 up to the local managers anymore. All the Walmart's will be closed which a lot of them were already 372 00:23:18,640 --> 00:23:22,960 closed or at least had like severely limited hours but they're just the whole of the 25th. 373 00:23:22,960 --> 00:23:26,640 They're all going to be closed so people I think are getting wind of that and they're all 374 00:23:26,640 --> 00:23:31,280 they're going to Lancy. They're starting to fill out the stores right now. Well what about Black 375 00:23:31,280 --> 00:23:37,840 Friday? Did anybody do Black Friday? Nope. Nope. Me either. I didn't go online and also we're 376 00:23:37,840 --> 00:23:41,760 trying to we're trying to hold on to money man. We got it. We got a we're looking at new insurance 377 00:23:41,760 --> 00:23:46,640 straight up adult problems over here. Yeah. We're not buying a lot of extra stuff. 378 00:23:47,920 --> 00:23:54,880 You know but that's a lot of people. Yeah. That is a lot of people so I don't feel bad about that 379 00:23:54,880 --> 00:24:00,160 at all. No. It'd be interesting to see when Black Friday dies because the hype around it 380 00:24:00,160 --> 00:24:05,680 is becoming more and more cynical with every year that it hits. No one needs a television anymore. 381 00:24:05,680 --> 00:24:09,600 Right. As I posted it I posted it in my blue sky and it was the most light 382 00:24:09,600 --> 00:24:14,160 thing that I've put up so far. I've only been over there for like a little bit but 383 00:24:15,040 --> 00:24:22,320 and those of you who don't know blue sky is basically an older an older feel of what Twitter 384 00:24:22,320 --> 00:24:29,520 used to be before it became the mismatch of like ads and greed and everything that was on there. 385 00:24:30,400 --> 00:24:36,000 Now there will be ads later but right now I'm enjoying it without ads but I put on there no 386 00:24:36,000 --> 00:24:41,520 I don't know I just put random names. No Darren. I don't want another damn flat screen TV for Black 387 00:24:41,520 --> 00:24:47,360 Friday. Call me when meat goes down 70% because I'll be there to wreck your aisles. 388 00:24:48,960 --> 00:24:53,760 People were like yeah this guy knows what's up. No one needs to deviate. 389 00:24:54,880 --> 00:24:59,040 Give me some cheap protein. That's all I need man because for some reason if it's not go hell 390 00:24:59,040 --> 00:25:05,840 even nuts are going up in price too man just all forms of protein so. Food and snacks are all 391 00:25:05,840 --> 00:25:11,440 going up. The produce aisle is doing okay right now for what I'm getting because I don't get 392 00:25:11,440 --> 00:25:16,320 anything overly complicated. It's normally like for servings that we need for a week is like only 393 00:25:16,320 --> 00:25:21,280 like two or three dollars per like group of whatever vegetable I'm getting but I digress. 394 00:25:21,280 --> 00:25:28,640 This one is there's a little it's a little scatological okay but you know it wasn't funny. 395 00:25:28,640 --> 00:25:33,120 It's a story that they say that it wasn't funny at the time but now it's super hilarious and will 396 00:25:33,120 --> 00:25:38,400 always be forever known as a Christmas surprise. So let me set the stage real quick. My family always 397 00:25:38,400 --> 00:25:42,320 goes to Christmas Eve Mass and then we come home and we exchange our secret Santa gifts between 398 00:25:42,320 --> 00:25:47,040 siblings. It's a tradition at this point. There's a lot of us my two sisters my brother parents my 399 00:25:47,040 --> 00:25:52,640 grandparents and my sister's fiancee so we're all in multiple cars. Mass is ended and I left with my 400 00:25:52,640 --> 00:25:56,400 oldest sister and her fiancee to go back home. The others were several minutes behind us. 401 00:25:56,400 --> 00:26:02,080 Another important thing we have two small dogs a Chihuahua and a terrier mix. We put in small 402 00:26:02,080 --> 00:26:06,080 cages when we leave the house. So my sister her fiancee and I get back and as soon as we walk in 403 00:26:06,080 --> 00:26:12,640 the door we're bombarded with the smell of hot poop. It's so pungent that my eyes are watering. 404 00:26:12,640 --> 00:26:17,680 Definitely in my top 10 worst things I've ever smelled. No idea how long the poop had just been 405 00:26:17,680 --> 00:26:21,440 sitting there but it was long enough that the entire house smelled like shit. It was like we 406 00:26:21,440 --> 00:26:25,600 were choking on it. I could God they just keep going. They're talking about how bad it is. 407 00:26:25,600 --> 00:26:31,120 There's like four more sentences. I'm not reading all that. I mean not even that. So the three of 408 00:26:31,120 --> 00:26:35,920 us are just yelling and freaking out at the smell. The house alarm is going off because we forgot to 409 00:26:35,920 --> 00:26:40,240 turn it off when we walked in. The dogs are barking to be let out of their cages like they always do 410 00:26:40,240 --> 00:26:45,280 because they know we just got home. So I go over and obviously the smell is getting worse the closer 411 00:26:45,280 --> 00:26:49,760 we get to them. I'll let the terrier mix out of his cage first because he's completely clean. 412 00:26:49,760 --> 00:26:56,800 The Chihuahua on the other hand well poop in his cage. He had full blown explosion. His doggy bed 413 00:26:56,800 --> 00:27:03,280 was soaked. It had leaked into the hardwood floors. It had exploded onto the walls. The small white 414 00:27:03,280 --> 00:27:09,520 Chihuahua had practically rolled in it and he's sopping wet. His fur is stained and he's just 415 00:27:09,520 --> 00:27:14,560 sitting there barking at me wiggling like crazy. So happy that I'm home and slinging shit everywhere 416 00:27:14,560 --> 00:27:20,320 because he wants to be let out of his cage. It's so bad. And I'm just sitting there in my dress 417 00:27:20,320 --> 00:27:24,640 and heels. I'm really trying not to throw up and trying to figure out how I can let him out of his 418 00:27:24,640 --> 00:27:30,240 cage without letting him drag the liquid poop all over the house and the furniture. Oh my god. Okay. 419 00:27:30,240 --> 00:27:35,440 I gotta get my diet. I want to keep chucking. My mind keeps bouncing. So my fist. My sister finally 420 00:27:35,440 --> 00:27:40,000 gets to the back door yelling potty. Gotta go potty. Since that's our dog's excuse to just run 421 00:27:40,000 --> 00:27:45,760 straight outside. Luckily the little poo mop went straight out the door and so we didn't drag 422 00:27:45,760 --> 00:27:50,400 poo all over the place. There were just a few drops on a straight trail to the back door and it 423 00:27:50,400 --> 00:27:57,520 could have been much worse. The cage, the floor, the wall. They're just destroyed. Do you know 424 00:27:57,520 --> 00:28:04,960 I can taste it now? I think we've all experienced bad dog poop in a localized situation. Oh yeah. 425 00:28:06,320 --> 00:28:10,640 And one day I'll regale you with my story. We're not going to keep going with the poop 426 00:28:10,640 --> 00:28:16,640 story after this one but we're almost done. If you've ever seen the scene from bad grandpa 427 00:28:16,640 --> 00:28:21,680 where he sharts on the wall then you can picture exactly what kind of mess we're staring at. But 428 00:28:21,680 --> 00:28:26,240 this wasn't a prank. They just want to make sure that you, they just want to make sure it's all 429 00:28:26,240 --> 00:28:32,960 shit. It's all on the walls and I'm the one that has to clean it up. So I'm the one who loves animals 430 00:28:32,960 --> 00:28:37,600 so much that I want to work at a vet. So naturally I get stuck with all the gross jobs as practice. 431 00:28:37,600 --> 00:28:41,680 Also because I'm the only one besides my mom who doesn't freak out and throw up when uh, 432 00:28:41,680 --> 00:28:48,640 when, uh, when, uh, when close and personal with doggy poo or other nasty stuff. I'm still the 433 00:28:48,640 --> 00:28:53,280 one who cleans all that up. Anyway, the first thing I did was just toss out the entire bed. 434 00:28:53,280 --> 00:28:58,400 It was so not, not worth saving. I threw out the food bowl, the water dish, and I had to use an 435 00:28:58,400 --> 00:29:04,080 entire paper towel roll to stop up the hardwood flooring cage. Don't forget, I'm doing this with 436 00:29:04,080 --> 00:29:09,040 my bare fucking hands because I can't find any rubber gloves. I had to drag the cage away from 437 00:29:09,040 --> 00:29:14,240 the wall so I could get close enough to clean it. But in my haste to clean everything up, 438 00:29:14,240 --> 00:29:20,640 I forgot that liquid poo can spread underneath the cage. No. So of course I just spread this 439 00:29:20,640 --> 00:29:26,000 poo further along the floor. I don't know how I've been able to avoid that, however. So my 440 00:29:26,000 --> 00:29:30,560 fiance quickly carries the cage outside so it could be hosed off and that makes more shit drop 441 00:29:30,560 --> 00:29:35,200 onto the floor between the cages in the back door. I'm so focused on cleaning the epicenter of this 442 00:29:35,200 --> 00:29:41,040 disaster that my sister opens up the floor trail where I'm still focused on it. My sister cleans 443 00:29:41,040 --> 00:29:45,920 the floor trail where it dribbled and I finally get the wood floor completely wiped up and disinfected 444 00:29:45,920 --> 00:29:52,400 with floor ox so I can get closer to the wall without putting my heels or god forbid my bare feet 445 00:29:52,400 --> 00:29:57,920 in diarrhea. Then I start wiping it off the walls. Surprisingly, it didn't stain or tint the white 446 00:29:57,920 --> 00:30:03,040 paint brown. So at least there's that. Now at this point, I have been cleaning up shit for a solid 10 447 00:30:03,040 --> 00:30:07,360 to 15 minutes. I didn't have to be the one that bathed the poop dogs since everyone agreed I had 448 00:30:07,360 --> 00:30:12,640 done more than my fair share. Mom had to go outside and pick them up with an old bath towel and carry 449 00:30:12,640 --> 00:30:17,040 them straight to the tub and I spent five minutes furiously scrubbing my hands with soap. I'm 450 00:30:17,040 --> 00:30:22,880 imagining like Mcbeth, Lady Big Meth, ouch damn spot. I'm cleaning it up with my bare hands and it 451 00:30:22,880 --> 00:30:28,240 got all over me but I was lucky that none of it had gotten onto my dress. None of it got on the dress 452 00:30:28,240 --> 00:30:34,640 or my heels. So yeah, that's the infamous 2015 Christmas surprise. Hopefully it made somebody 453 00:30:34,640 --> 00:30:41,440 laugh. Looks like it did. Oh my face hurts. Yeah, it's still a nightmare. It's still a nightmare 454 00:30:41,440 --> 00:30:46,400 when I think about it. That's good. That was a good long story and that's the Christmas joy that I 455 00:30:46,400 --> 00:30:54,880 bring to you guys. Oh my god. Look. Small body, such massive volume is all I'm thinking. I can smell 456 00:30:54,880 --> 00:31:03,520 it. I can taste it. I can feel the heat. Just what a well written. They did great. They came into 457 00:31:03,520 --> 00:31:09,280 slay with their words and they did a great job. They did a great job. Oh my god. It's the second 458 00:31:09,280 --> 00:31:14,000 favorite post on there and I think the only reason it isn't more is because some people, 459 00:31:14,000 --> 00:31:18,560 even if it is in a humorous situation, some people just, you know, they hear dog poop and 460 00:31:18,560 --> 00:31:24,160 like, I don't want to hear about that. Oh come on. Dogs are awesome. Live with this person's misery. 461 00:31:24,160 --> 00:31:30,000 Commiserate with them. That's important. So yeah, I feel like we've all had much better 462 00:31:30,000 --> 00:31:35,920 Christmases than that. Hopefully, that was 2015. So they've had nine years to get better Christmas. 463 00:31:35,920 --> 00:31:41,120 Eight years coming up on the ninth. Well, to recover from the smell too. I mean, that takes a while. 464 00:31:41,120 --> 00:31:49,200 Just to purge back from your memory. I haven't had a dog in a while. So I don't want this episode 465 00:31:49,200 --> 00:31:54,800 to be about dog poop. But I mean, I feel like these are now a story in the forefront of my mind. 466 00:31:54,800 --> 00:32:01,040 The worst time that we moved into an old trailer that was basically just a tin can painted blue 467 00:32:01,040 --> 00:32:09,280 and it was warm outside and while we were gone, our medium sized like yellow Labrador mud mix 468 00:32:09,280 --> 00:32:14,800 got into some chocolate donuts and proceeded to repaint the carpet that we had in the middle 469 00:32:14,800 --> 00:32:19,760 of the floor. It was a nice new carpet too. Like we were really happy that we got it was a house 470 00:32:19,760 --> 00:32:24,080 warming gift. And again, like I said, it was really warm outside. So all it did was bake. It was 471 00:32:24,080 --> 00:32:29,440 horrible. And so yeah, that's I think that's where my memory of that smell came along with that story 472 00:32:29,440 --> 00:32:36,160 too. That started like creeping up in my nose. I got a story. I ate it. I got it. Edith has a story 473 00:32:36,160 --> 00:32:42,000 about poop and it was at Christmas time. And so my ex-husband has a restaurant that's called 474 00:32:42,000 --> 00:32:49,680 Mima's Alaskan Tacos and it is in Ebor City in Tampa. And I got to work there and mind you, 475 00:32:49,680 --> 00:32:56,880 it was all men at the time and only me. Well, we serve beer and we would be open until four 476 00:32:56,880 --> 00:33:02,800 o'clock in the morning. We'd get everyone nice and drunk, fill their bellies full of tacos and 477 00:33:02,800 --> 00:33:11,200 nachos and beans. Okay. And then they would proceed to go into our bathroom. During the holiday, 478 00:33:11,200 --> 00:33:18,800 somebody went in there and just I'm going to say it, just shit. Just fill the toilet full of 479 00:33:18,800 --> 00:33:26,000 shit to the point and then they must have been in there flushing and flushing and flushing until 480 00:33:26,000 --> 00:33:33,360 it just like billowed, billowed out of the commode and it came into the kitchen. And do you know 481 00:33:33,360 --> 00:33:39,920 who all those lovely men looked at to clean up that mess? Of course. Me. Yeah. The woman. I'm the 482 00:33:39,920 --> 00:33:45,840 nurse. Yeah. I deal with it all the time. You used to shit all the time. So I did clean it up. I 483 00:33:45,840 --> 00:33:52,800 sure did. I was in there for two hours. And I'll tell you, that's the last time I worked at Mima's 484 00:33:52,800 --> 00:34:00,640 Alaskan Tacos. Holy hell. I didn't want the, what do they call it? Shit with the shit can job? 485 00:34:00,640 --> 00:34:08,480 Yeah. That's exactly what that was at that point. Yeah. Yeah. So yeah. I wish for everybody 486 00:34:08,480 --> 00:34:16,720 better Christmases than both of those. Let's do a hard pivot before another shit story comes into 487 00:34:16,720 --> 00:34:22,000 our minds. Hold on. Before we do, I hope everyone has a less shitty Christmas. God, God, joke. 488 00:34:23,040 --> 00:34:29,920 Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. That's a good gap. So we've got about 20 minutes and I feel like 489 00:34:29,920 --> 00:34:34,960 that's a good time for either one of us, maybe like eight minutes, nine minutes at a time. 490 00:34:34,960 --> 00:34:40,560 That math doesn't work out. To talk about just a couple of things, maybe two things, 491 00:34:40,560 --> 00:34:46,480 I think two would be good and explain why. What's sparking joy in our life right now? And not just 492 00:34:46,480 --> 00:34:51,600 because of holiday joy, you know, the stuff that we get because of nostalgia, you know, the lights, 493 00:34:51,600 --> 00:34:56,240 the colors, the temperatures dropping, depending on where you live. Sometimes you don't even feel 494 00:34:56,240 --> 00:35:02,160 that dropping like right now it's, it was 66 degrees here in Georgia and just wet and gross. But 495 00:35:02,160 --> 00:35:09,040 it was wet and gross. Yeah, two things that that spark joy that aren't necessary holiday related, 496 00:35:09,040 --> 00:35:14,080 something that's making you actually feel that moment of, you know, your, your face lights up 497 00:35:14,080 --> 00:35:18,400 because this is happening or you've received a certain thing and Sydney, since you're the 498 00:35:18,400 --> 00:35:22,000 guest, you get to go first. Cool. So I guess like two things that are kind of really, really 499 00:35:22,000 --> 00:35:27,280 bringing me a lot of joy is I have now kind of not been on the market, but also kind of on the 500 00:35:27,280 --> 00:35:33,600 market. I'm getting this dude from down in St. Petersburg, Florida, and he has been super 501 00:35:33,600 --> 00:35:39,600 awesome and super healthy and brought a like a lot of like challenging things to my life to be able 502 00:35:39,600 --> 00:35:44,880 to keep me on track so I can grow. And we also have like really deep, deep conversations. And 503 00:35:44,880 --> 00:35:50,560 he's got like the right kind of sexuality with me and everything else is just flowing perfectly. 504 00:35:50,560 --> 00:35:54,320 So I'm really, really excited. It's new. It's like less than a month, but I mean, things are going 505 00:35:54,320 --> 00:36:02,080 really, really well. I like the healthy part of it. Yeah. So I'm from St. Petersburg. What's 506 00:36:02,080 --> 00:36:09,760 not great about that? Exactly. Eden says hi from Tampa. I definitely will. Yeah. I know he's been 507 00:36:09,760 --> 00:36:13,280 begging for the link. So I'm going to make sure he gets it because he wanted to send the other ones. 508 00:36:13,280 --> 00:36:21,760 Yeah. And then what else? Yeah, one more. My kiddo graduated basic training. Hey, excellent. 509 00:36:21,760 --> 00:36:27,200 So yeah, following in my footsteps and he's doing good. So I got to go see him graduate and 510 00:36:27,200 --> 00:36:32,000 got to get out to California, which was really awesome last month and got to sit by the beach 511 00:36:32,000 --> 00:36:37,120 with him. And it was all around good. So it's those are my two joyful things that I really, 512 00:36:37,120 --> 00:36:42,880 really enjoyed having in my life. That's amazing. Yeah, that's good news. Getting out of boot camp. 513 00:36:42,880 --> 00:36:48,160 So what's going to be, is it called an MOS in the Marines? I'm not, I don't know. Okay. So yeah, 514 00:36:48,160 --> 00:36:53,920 what's his MOS? So as of right now, it's technically an engineer. He did injure himself. So he's 515 00:36:53,920 --> 00:36:59,200 got to heal up. And then as long as like the healing and the schooling time, start time, 516 00:36:59,200 --> 00:37:04,080 match up, then he can still do that. But also if it doesn't match up, then he may get reassigned 517 00:37:04,080 --> 00:37:08,640 and go somewhere else. We're not sure yet. Okay. Well, I mean, he passed. He's in there. 518 00:37:08,640 --> 00:37:13,040 You know, yeah. Yeah. He's in the system now. That's awesome. And since I asked the question, 519 00:37:13,040 --> 00:37:18,880 I guess it's Edis turn out. Wow. So, you know, I've been traveling for the past few years, 520 00:37:18,880 --> 00:37:24,800 and I've been really, really looking for myself. And I have to say in this past month, what really 521 00:37:24,800 --> 00:37:31,920 has brought me joy is not being an ego. I don't have to be an ego anymore. I don't, 522 00:37:31,920 --> 00:37:40,000 I don't feel like I'm constantly trying to figure myself out, or I'm trying to quit something, or 523 00:37:40,000 --> 00:37:46,240 or somebody's screwing me over, or I've got to, I've got to, you know, I mean, ego is just such 524 00:37:46,240 --> 00:37:53,840 an awful, awful place to be. And especially I speak up for myself now. I haven't. Yes. Thank you, 525 00:37:53,840 --> 00:38:01,520 Sydney. Thank you, Michael. I speak up for myself and I say what I mean and I mean what I say, 526 00:38:01,520 --> 00:38:08,480 and I say how I feel. And especially at work, I have to tell you this little story. Please do. 527 00:38:08,480 --> 00:38:16,480 That, you know, some of the aids like to give me shit. They are little ghetto queens, and I get that. 528 00:38:16,480 --> 00:38:22,720 And normally I just blow through it and I don't say a word and they keep up their crap, right, 529 00:38:22,720 --> 00:38:27,600 throughout the whole shift. And it makes me uncomfortable. This last time, this last couple 530 00:38:27,600 --> 00:38:33,920 of times, I said, don't test me, do not test me, do not disrespect me. I am here to help you and 531 00:38:33,920 --> 00:38:39,600 you're here to help me. And that is it with our relationship. We are not friends. We're not 532 00:38:39,600 --> 00:38:46,240 girlfriends. I'm not your mother. I'm not here to take a beating for you. Oh, yeah. So I've never 533 00:38:46,240 --> 00:38:52,080 done that. And I got mad respect from them for doing that. They cleaned up their act and they 534 00:38:52,080 --> 00:38:57,680 helped me. And I'm there. I'm there for you. I'm there. I'm here to help you. Why are you making 535 00:38:57,680 --> 00:39:03,280 this so tough? Yeah, why are you turning away health? It's ridiculous. Yeah, exactly. So 536 00:39:03,280 --> 00:39:08,720 does that bring me joy? Yes. Standing up for myself brings me such joy. My addiction. That 537 00:39:08,720 --> 00:39:16,240 brings me joy for you. It really does. Yeah, I know, you know, I smoke a little bit at bedtime 538 00:39:16,240 --> 00:39:21,360 to help me just kind of go to sleep, but I don't smoke during the day anymore. The sugar, I limit 539 00:39:21,360 --> 00:39:28,480 it. I haven't cut it completely out, but I limit it. And before I was a sugar addict. So what brings 540 00:39:28,480 --> 00:39:35,840 me joy now is waking up in the morning, exercising and riding my bike. What two wonderfully holistic 541 00:39:35,840 --> 00:39:41,600 joys that you have found in yourself that like literally start from within and start manifesting 542 00:39:41,600 --> 00:39:47,440 without. That's awesome. Yeah, that is really cool. Yeah. Thank you, Sydney. Thank you. All right. So 543 00:39:47,440 --> 00:39:51,520 I've done that thing where I've asked a question and then let the other people go to give me enough 544 00:39:51,520 --> 00:39:56,640 time to think about my answers. The first thing that has brought me an immense joy and I've seen 545 00:39:56,640 --> 00:40:04,000 it kind of culminate over the last few days. And that is making friends with this guy named Ryan 546 00:40:04,000 --> 00:40:10,560 Bray back in 2008, 2009. Quick story about how we met. We met at Arby's. Okay, we're introduced. We 547 00:40:10,560 --> 00:40:14,880 both realized that we both have kind of like the same kind of personality when it comes to meeting 548 00:40:14,880 --> 00:40:20,320 each other, like talking to people, the way that we put ourselves out there. And we just melded 549 00:40:20,320 --> 00:40:24,880 from there almost immediately. It wasn't long before he was a roommate with me and my wife. 550 00:40:24,880 --> 00:40:31,520 And, you know, he kind of grew up from teenager to young adulthood with us, like late teenager 19, 551 00:40:31,520 --> 00:40:37,040 like that team. And we were, because I was like 23 at the time, so it's not like we were like, 552 00:40:37,040 --> 00:40:43,840 like a large anyway, we wind up putting out videos on MySpace silly little videos that have like 553 00:40:43,840 --> 00:40:49,200 large overarching stories. He taught me how to paint. I wound up going to like his house for 554 00:40:49,200 --> 00:40:54,800 Christmas a couple of times, became friends with some of his friends, flash forward like years later. 555 00:40:54,800 --> 00:40:59,600 He's introducing me to the guy who that we didn't know at the time was going to talk to me into 556 00:40:59,600 --> 00:41:08,640 writing my first book. And then this guy whose name is Tade Davis, wonderful guy. I am now LinkedIn 557 00:41:08,640 --> 00:41:15,040 with his live D&D show and also maybe working on a few other projects with him as well. And 558 00:41:15,040 --> 00:41:23,040 after our last show, we're sitting there and having dinner, like almost 11 o'clock, eating Mexican 559 00:41:23,040 --> 00:41:29,360 food because that's the best food to eat at 11 o'clock at night. And the guy who's sitting next 560 00:41:29,360 --> 00:41:34,480 to me, I recognize him because I've been over to some Tade Davis's friends giving events and I 561 00:41:34,480 --> 00:41:39,040 recognize the guy who couldn't remember his name. He said, Oh, my name is John. And I know about 562 00:41:39,040 --> 00:41:43,600 comic books. I'm with Richard's Comics. Richard's Comics is the one shop that Ryan goes to every 563 00:41:43,600 --> 00:41:49,440 comic book year, every comic book day, once a year to go draw for people like sketch for people and 564 00:41:49,440 --> 00:41:54,240 hand out his comics for free. And so I was like, Okay, so I know Richard's Comics. I was like, 565 00:41:54,240 --> 00:41:58,800 What's your last name? So the guy says his last name. And I'm like, Ryan Bray talks about you 566 00:41:58,800 --> 00:42:04,080 all the time. So, Ryan's been such an integral part of my life, even though we don't, there's 567 00:42:04,080 --> 00:42:09,760 periods where we just don't talk. But he has been, it's been a joy to watch his family grow. It was 568 00:42:09,760 --> 00:42:17,280 a joy to grow with him and the art and friendship and brotherhood that we have. So that man right 569 00:42:17,280 --> 00:42:22,480 there, one of the biggest points of joy in my life right now. That's beautiful. And then the other one, 570 00:42:22,480 --> 00:42:28,080 and this is silly, stupid, and wonderful. And it is the sheer amount of rubber ducks that are coming 571 00:42:28,080 --> 00:42:34,160 to me. Recently, I don't know if you guys know this, but I collect rubber ducks. I don't seek them 572 00:42:34,160 --> 00:42:40,400 out. When I when I find them, or if they if people give them to me, that's cool. But I don't seek 573 00:42:40,400 --> 00:42:43,920 them out. I don't like go to a store is like, All right, this is the day I'm buying five ducks. No, 574 00:42:43,920 --> 00:42:48,240 when they come across and they're reasonably priced, or God forbid, sometimes they're free, 575 00:42:48,240 --> 00:42:51,840 because they're not even supposed to be there. Like one time there was a gold duck just sitting 576 00:42:51,840 --> 00:42:56,080 in a display that was left over from an old display in a bath and body works. And I asked 577 00:42:56,080 --> 00:42:59,200 them was like, How much is that duck? I was like, Here, have the duck. I'm like, Yes. 578 00:43:01,200 --> 00:43:08,000 And a friend of mine just recently bought me a rubber duck advent calendar. And I'm on day 10. 579 00:43:08,000 --> 00:43:11,920 And as soon as we get done with this, I'm filming me opening up the 10th one. 580 00:43:11,920 --> 00:43:18,400 And rubber ducks and brotherhood people. I love it. We all sound like we're doing good. 581 00:43:18,400 --> 00:43:24,480 I love it. We checking in with each other and it's going to be a great Christmas. And Sydney, 582 00:43:24,480 --> 00:43:31,360 you bring me joy. That story about you and your friend from St. Petersburg. That is just 583 00:43:31,360 --> 00:43:36,400 that is great. I'm so happy for you. Merry Christmas, my friend. 584 00:43:37,200 --> 00:43:41,680 Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas to both of you. And to just keep piling on top of Sydney, 585 00:43:41,680 --> 00:43:47,280 you're looking good. Thank you. And it's not just, you know, it's not just what you do to your face, 586 00:43:47,280 --> 00:43:50,320 but also the shape of your face. You can tell there's some health in it, Matt. 587 00:43:51,280 --> 00:43:55,200 Yeah. And happiness. I see the joy. We do love to see that. 588 00:43:56,160 --> 00:44:01,840 Yeah. I have to ask a question and we can cut this out if you don't want to talk about it on 589 00:44:01,840 --> 00:44:05,360 the podcast. What happened to your channel? So when I was out in Coronado. 590 00:44:05,360 --> 00:44:09,520 Take our channel specifically. Yeah. So when I was out in Coronado with my son, 591 00:44:09,520 --> 00:44:15,600 we were done at San Diego. I hooked up with a buddy of mine that I served with and I served with him 592 00:44:15,600 --> 00:44:22,480 like almost almost my entire eight years. And we had a lot of discussion about social media and 593 00:44:22,480 --> 00:44:26,800 like what kind of presence I'm having on there. We also had like a lot of discussion about how 594 00:44:26,800 --> 00:44:31,120 much time that's been taking out of my life and a lot of anxiety and stuff like that. Oh, wow. 595 00:44:32,960 --> 00:44:37,200 There's been since I started that channel, there's been like a couple of different 596 00:44:37,200 --> 00:44:42,960 evolutions of what I've kind of portrayed and like this weird journey thing, but also like me 597 00:44:42,960 --> 00:44:49,120 getting lost and stuff. Yeah. And he said that social media from his perspective really kind of 598 00:44:49,120 --> 00:44:53,840 screwed me over with a lot of things and like my journey and where I need to be versus where I am. 599 00:44:53,840 --> 00:44:59,600 So I talked with my son and he said that he stopped following me on certain social media stuff 600 00:44:59,600 --> 00:45:02,800 because like, I don't know, for whatever reason, there were certain things that was wearing on 601 00:45:02,800 --> 00:45:08,400 him too. So I didn't want to put that kind of toxic stuff that was out there already. So I took 602 00:45:08,400 --> 00:45:13,440 everything down. We're reassessing a lot of stuff. We're growing a lot. I'm going through a lot of 603 00:45:13,440 --> 00:45:17,280 different changes with therapy and with the substance abuse trip program and stuff which 604 00:45:17,280 --> 00:45:22,800 I'm almost done with. But I'm just taking some time to like kind of regroup and put all of my 605 00:45:22,800 --> 00:45:26,800 put everything where I need it to be. So if I'm going to relaunch when I do relaunch, 606 00:45:26,800 --> 00:45:31,200 it's going to be something that's truly authentically me, not just the version of me that 607 00:45:31,200 --> 00:45:34,640 is one day really hurt and sad and painful and then the next day is something else. 608 00:45:34,640 --> 00:45:40,160 Like I'm going to have the idea of what I am and who I am versus the mess that has been. 609 00:45:40,160 --> 00:45:47,600 Wow, that's, I'm hearing a real butterfly, chrysalis metaphor, metaphorical 610 00:45:48,480 --> 00:45:51,840 manifestation. Nope, that's not it. Metamorphosis. 611 00:45:51,840 --> 00:45:53,520 Metamorphosis. Okay. 612 00:45:53,520 --> 00:46:01,840 It's definitely that I am doing now instead of talking about, I mean, because of the, 613 00:46:01,840 --> 00:46:07,760 and I will edit this part out, but because of the bipolar disorder and the ADHD and all 614 00:46:07,760 --> 00:46:14,560 and the autism and things that I had to deal with being an addict. Now that I am telling myself, 615 00:46:14,560 --> 00:46:20,560 you know what, I'm a whole person. I am a whole person and I don't have to talk about my addiction 616 00:46:20,560 --> 00:46:26,320 every single day and I don't have to talk about how I'm addicted to people or addicted to the 617 00:46:26,320 --> 00:46:32,880 perspectives of people. Now what I need to be doing is focusing on my fitness, focusing on 618 00:46:32,880 --> 00:46:41,200 preparing, I'm going because I am, I'm newly found Jewish. I was born, my parents brought me up as 619 00:46:41,200 --> 00:46:48,880 Baptist and in a Baptist cult and denied anything to do with being Jewish. Didn't bring me up to 620 00:46:48,880 --> 00:46:55,200 be Jewish at all. Right. Brought me up to be Baptist. So I'm going to the Camino in Santiago, 621 00:46:55,200 --> 00:47:03,360 Spain to do a pilgrimage walk, to embrace being Jewish. I'm also going to Auschwitz and I'm going 622 00:47:03,360 --> 00:47:10,400 to Berlin. I'm all, I'm going to London and I'm going to Paris and I'm going to Jewish monasteries 623 00:47:10,400 --> 00:47:16,480 while I'm there to meet other Jewish people. I am feeling a little emotional because I... 624 00:47:16,480 --> 00:47:19,920 That's why I suggest you actually leave this in because this is really good. 625 00:47:20,640 --> 00:47:23,920 Yeah, it's better than you think it is. It's good to see this. 626 00:47:24,800 --> 00:47:26,960 I think you're, I think you're going to like to see it too. 627 00:47:26,960 --> 00:47:34,480 Well, it's hard. It's hard to be something I never, never even understand. No one's even 628 00:47:34,480 --> 00:47:41,440 talked to me about it or they just brought me up as someone else. I'm not that person. I have so 629 00:47:41,440 --> 00:47:48,800 much love in my heart and I thank you both so much for being here. I'm really, I go through so much 630 00:47:48,800 --> 00:47:58,320 identity crisis and it's nice now to finally know who I am. Yeah. Thank you. So thank you. 631 00:47:58,320 --> 00:48:01,600 Hey, you're welcome. I'm so proud of you. I'm so excited for you too. This is awesome. 632 00:48:01,600 --> 00:48:09,040 That is, that is, you, you have, I have seen you open up before like any attempt to share with somebody 633 00:48:09,040 --> 00:48:13,360 and everything, but I don't think you really like reach down so far that you hit your biggest nerve 634 00:48:13,360 --> 00:48:17,600 before. You know what I'm saying? Like you're doing, this is, this is wonderful. I, oh God, 635 00:48:17,600 --> 00:48:22,560 I wish I was there because whenever anybody cries, my first instinct is to like, like dad hug somebody. 636 00:48:22,560 --> 00:48:30,160 You know, it's like, oh, come here. Yeah. Well, I'm telling you, I love you too. I love you both 637 00:48:30,160 --> 00:48:36,240 so much. I, I'm so glad I could be with you both and share with you both because I know you 638 00:48:36,240 --> 00:48:43,280 genuinely care. Sydney, you, you're going through it. You've gone through it and you know what it's 639 00:48:43,280 --> 00:48:48,240 like to be in an ego where you're like, no, I'm this person and then the next person, the next 640 00:48:48,240 --> 00:48:54,640 minute you're like, no, I'm this person and then no, I'm this person. No, I'm Edith. I'm going to be, 641 00:48:54,640 --> 00:49:01,920 my name is Edith Ivey Rosenblatt. It's a nice Jewish name. I love it and I can't wait to have it 642 00:49:01,920 --> 00:49:10,480 legally changed. People don't believe it. It's on your hat. It is. Hello. Hello. My name is Edith. 643 00:49:10,480 --> 00:49:18,080 Love it. So on that note, I'm all poopery now. Yeah. On that nice warm and wet note that doesn't 644 00:49:18,080 --> 00:49:24,720 have to do with anything dog related. It's not hot poop. Poop. God, that word will never not be 645 00:49:24,720 --> 00:49:30,240 funny. They all say that it's not and it is. It is funny. Damn it. All right. Well, I think that 646 00:49:30,240 --> 00:49:34,800 was a good. I think it was a good episode. Good holiday episode, guys. Yeah. It was a lot of fun. 647 00:49:34,800 --> 00:49:40,400 We did it. Thank you. Not a problem. And I guess that's it. So I guess it's. 648 00:49:40,400 --> 00:50:04,400 Word to your mom. There it is. Bye. Bye. 649 00:50:10,880 --> 00:50:15,440 Small town cafe with secrets blend with Steve. 650 00:50:19,120 --> 00:50:24,160 Voices rise and fall like rivers in a dream. 651 00:50:27,600 --> 00:50:35,920 From heart breaks to triumphs, sales unfold. Speak your truth. Let your courage be bold. 652 00:50:35,920 --> 00:50:44,560 Stay alive. Let your heart online. This corner booth piece you'll find. 653 00:50:44,560 --> 00:51:06,320 Whether you're the robot, say so tall in the warmth of coffee, there's room for all. 654 00:51:06,320 --> 00:51:16,080 Bisexual coffee. It's only $7. It won't break the bank.