WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:02.379 After much juggling of busy schedules, we're 00:00:02.379 --> 00:00:06.599 saying a big see you in a bit to Tash as a regular 00:00:06.599 --> 00:00:09.759 co -host. While she won't be around every week 00:00:09.759 --> 00:00:12.480 anymore, don't worry, she'll still pop in from 00:00:12.480 --> 00:00:15.320 time to time, dropping in her signature humor 00:00:15.320 --> 00:00:19.539 and wisdom when you least expect it. Enter Jay, 00:00:19.640 --> 00:00:21.920 our new co -host here at That's Not The Point 00:00:21.920 --> 00:00:24.760 pod. We're excited to have her join in all the 00:00:24.760 --> 00:00:27.460 chaos and we know that you'll love the new dynamic. 00:00:27.960 --> 00:00:30.480 Thanks for sticking with us and get ready for 00:00:30.480 --> 00:00:46.060 even more fun. Here we go. So what I really hate 00:00:46.060 --> 00:00:51.149 is that on my way here, I came across a bunch 00:00:51.149 --> 00:00:53.369 of kids, and one of the kids was like, oh, your 00:00:53.369 --> 00:00:56.409 shoelace is untied. But I was too lazy and cold 00:00:56.409 --> 00:00:59.570 to tie my shoelace. And I hate that about myself. 00:01:00.329 --> 00:01:02.829 I was looking down at it. I was like, do you 00:01:02.829 --> 00:01:09.489 want to do it? And then while I said thank you 00:01:09.489 --> 00:01:11.530 and everything like that, I'm noticing that this 00:01:11.530 --> 00:01:13.870 kid is sharing a pack of rice cakes with his 00:01:13.870 --> 00:01:17.109 friends. What teenagers eat rice cakes on the 00:01:17.109 --> 00:01:22.510 street? Keto kids. The Keto babies? These kids 00:01:22.510 --> 00:01:25.989 are the generation. Outrageous. Anyway, guys, 00:01:26.069 --> 00:01:27.930 I'm so sorry. I had to do that. It was a tangent. 00:01:28.349 --> 00:01:34.909 I say all that to say, welcome Jaleesa. Welcome 00:01:34.909 --> 00:01:38.370 Jaleesa to the podcast. We had like such anticipation 00:01:38.370 --> 00:01:42.430 for your arrival. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. It's real. 00:01:42.430 --> 00:01:44.760 It's real talk. Uh, we couldn't wait till you 00:01:44.760 --> 00:01:47.400 were here and i'm very excited to introduce you 00:01:47.400 --> 00:01:49.400 to that's not the point podcast. How are you 00:01:49.400 --> 00:01:52.180 feeling? I'm feeling i'm feeling all right. I'm 00:01:52.180 --> 00:01:54.760 feeling um held against my will to be honest. 00:01:55.459 --> 00:01:57.620 Um This was a spirit of the moment decision within 00:01:57.620 --> 00:02:02.140 the past couple of weeks So I wasn't sure if 00:02:02.140 --> 00:02:03.760 I was gonna make it here today, but i'm here. 00:02:03.760 --> 00:02:06.079 I'm here. She did it. She did it. I made it I 00:02:06.079 --> 00:02:09.740 arrived guys You could call it blackmail or you 00:02:09.740 --> 00:02:14.000 can call it. What can you call it? No Well, no 00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:16.500 you blacked out me you just kind of threatened 00:02:16.500 --> 00:02:21.759 me to I Threaten you to what? Like it wasn't 00:02:21.759 --> 00:02:24.039 like a do this or it was just like do this do 00:02:24.039 --> 00:02:27.360 this. I mean, I I mean, okay guys Let's go back. 00:02:27.379 --> 00:02:30.180 Let's go way back and talk about how we know 00:02:30.180 --> 00:02:32.960 each other Let's just talk about how we know 00:02:32.960 --> 00:02:36.379 each other and how we got here. Um By the way, 00:02:36.460 --> 00:02:41.360 did I mention this is Jay? It's J guys, J's here. 00:02:41.560 --> 00:02:43.800 Welcome to it. Yeah, J's here. That rhymes. J's 00:02:43.800 --> 00:02:45.800 here, what's up? That's how we do it. I could 00:02:45.800 --> 00:02:50.360 do that all day. Now, we, uh, I know I've known 00:02:50.360 --> 00:02:53.120 J for a couple of years now. Yeah, since I was 00:02:53.120 --> 00:02:55.240 actually like scrolling through our conversation 00:02:55.240 --> 00:02:57.240 because I was like, I need to know when. And 00:02:57.240 --> 00:02:59.879 we first, our first interaction on WhatsApp was 00:02:59.879 --> 00:03:03.680 June the 13th, 2020. Oh my God. Yes. That's so 00:03:03.680 --> 00:03:04.840 romantic what you just said. Just before your 00:03:04.840 --> 00:03:07.469 birthday. Yeah, it was, it was, it was. with 00:03:07.469 --> 00:03:09.669 your but just before your birthday yeah yeah 00:03:09.669 --> 00:03:11.629 yeah you're born around the time for that that 00:03:11.629 --> 00:03:16.610 birthday it was it was quite an event what happened 00:03:16.610 --> 00:03:20.949 was i was on a train here in um in in germany 00:03:20.949 --> 00:03:25.650 and um i saw a man speaking on the train on the 00:03:25.650 --> 00:03:27.469 phone with his friends and he was speaking english 00:03:27.469 --> 00:03:29.889 like north american english i say that now because 00:03:29.889 --> 00:03:32.810 i know what i know now but i thought he was american 00:03:33.480 --> 00:03:36.439 Just from his accent and he told me he was from 00:03:36.439 --> 00:03:39.439 Canada and said that's wonderful cool And I said 00:03:39.439 --> 00:03:41.419 it was the same thing because Canada America 00:03:41.419 --> 00:03:45.099 same thing And we liked each other's vibe and 00:03:45.099 --> 00:03:47.360 he said, you have to meet my wife. And I said, 00:03:47.360 --> 00:03:49.699 why? And he said, because she's dope and she's 00:03:49.699 --> 00:03:52.240 gonna love you and vice versa. So I said, that's 00:03:52.240 --> 00:03:54.919 great. So my stuff was coming off and you have 00:03:54.919 --> 00:03:56.960 to like kind of take out your phones and do the 00:03:56.960 --> 00:04:00.080 whole exchange. And he gets off on my stop because 00:04:00.080 --> 00:04:02.780 he really wanted me to meet his wife. And I thought 00:04:02.780 --> 00:04:05.139 that was really cool. So he did that and made 00:04:05.139 --> 00:04:08.639 that gesture. I said, of course. I say that all 00:04:08.639 --> 00:04:11.460 to say, that if you have the opportunity to meet 00:04:11.460 --> 00:04:15.000 someone and just take that chance because you 00:04:15.000 --> 00:04:17.500 never know what's going to happen. I just met 00:04:17.500 --> 00:04:20.199 a stranger on the train. I inserted myself into 00:04:20.199 --> 00:04:23.480 his conversation on the phone. And next thing 00:04:23.480 --> 00:04:26.800 you know, I am texting with his wife and she 00:04:26.800 --> 00:04:29.180 starts typing me in German and I don't speak 00:04:29.180 --> 00:04:31.850 German. So I told her that and she said, Oh, 00:04:31.910 --> 00:04:34.009 no worries. I speak English. And I said, that's 00:04:34.009 --> 00:04:36.410 great. So I did not know what she looked like, 00:04:36.490 --> 00:04:38.930 where she came from or anything because she had 00:04:38.930 --> 00:04:40.670 my number and she starts texting me. I was like, 00:04:40.709 --> 00:04:43.110 Oh my God, I'm in big trouble. Um, this woman's 00:04:43.110 --> 00:04:45.069 texting me because she didn't introduce herself. 00:04:45.129 --> 00:04:47.550 She just started talking and I didn't know where 00:04:47.550 --> 00:04:51.610 she came from. So when I discovered that that 00:04:51.610 --> 00:04:54.790 was his wife, I said, yeah, we have to meet. 00:04:54.870 --> 00:04:57.329 So we kept making plans to meet. And what happened? 00:04:57.389 --> 00:04:59.449 We never got to or what happened? Yes. So going 00:04:59.449 --> 00:05:03.009 back to you not knowing who I was or what I looked 00:05:03.009 --> 00:05:05.410 like at all, I think I also did that intentionally 00:05:05.410 --> 00:05:08.170 too, because I, yeah, I don't think I really 00:05:08.170 --> 00:05:11.069 even gave you anything that hinted towards what 00:05:11.069 --> 00:05:13.769 I looked like, who I was. And I think I had changed 00:05:13.769 --> 00:05:16.209 my display pictures like the non -picture. So 00:05:16.209 --> 00:05:18.550 she really had no idea what I looked like. So 00:05:18.550 --> 00:05:21.389 as we're talking for I think it was like a couple 00:05:21.389 --> 00:05:24.730 of weeks. We finally decided to meet up and the 00:05:24.730 --> 00:05:28.370 lovely Gio was like, I know this cafe by my house. 00:05:28.689 --> 00:05:30.029 You know, we could definitely go there. It's 00:05:30.029 --> 00:05:32.149 so nice. This isn't that. So I was like, yeah, 00:05:32.149 --> 00:05:34.509 cool. Like I know nothing about Hamburg. So I 00:05:34.509 --> 00:05:37.290 was like, sure, let's, let's do it. Cause Gio 00:05:37.290 --> 00:05:39.129 be out in the streets. So I was like, let's do 00:05:39.129 --> 00:05:42.949 it. So the day comes now. I get to the cafe and 00:05:42.949 --> 00:05:45.569 walk in the cafe now. I'm just like checking 00:05:45.569 --> 00:05:47.050 it out. It was really cute. Super cute. I think 00:05:47.050 --> 00:05:48.689 they had like little swings in there or something 00:05:48.689 --> 00:05:52.790 like that, right? And I'm looking at the display 00:05:52.790 --> 00:05:54.990 of the cakes and the desserts and stuff. So the 00:05:54.990 --> 00:05:57.069 guy's like, oh, hey, how you doing? I'm like, 00:05:57.089 --> 00:05:58.889 oh, good, I'm here. I'm about to meet someone. 00:05:58.990 --> 00:06:01.529 Because he's looking at me like, we're about 00:06:01.529 --> 00:06:02.889 to close. I don't know what this girl's looking 00:06:02.889 --> 00:06:06.350 for. I don't know this yet. So then he goes, 00:06:07.209 --> 00:06:10.569 yeah, the place is going to be closed in 15 minutes. 00:06:10.629 --> 00:06:14.589 I'm like, I'm sorry, what? He's like, yeah, we 00:06:14.589 --> 00:06:17.860 closed at 4. And I think Gio made the. these 00:06:17.860 --> 00:06:21.319 reservations for like, I don't know, it was like 00:06:21.319 --> 00:06:23.899 3 .30 and mind you, she came late on top of that. 00:06:23.980 --> 00:06:25.720 So first of all, you're late to a place that's 00:06:25.720 --> 00:06:28.860 closing in 15 minutes. So now I'm like, okay, 00:06:29.339 --> 00:06:31.819 you know what, Jay, give her a chance. She's 00:06:31.819 --> 00:06:34.300 late. She don't know the time of the place when 00:06:34.300 --> 00:06:37.439 it closes. It's like two strikes now. But I'm 00:06:37.439 --> 00:06:39.079 like, it's okay, it's okay, give her a chance. 00:06:39.579 --> 00:06:43.279 So I step out, I step out the cafe now. I think 00:06:43.279 --> 00:06:45.970 I waited like one or two more minutes. And then 00:06:45.970 --> 00:06:49.290 I see this black woman turn the corner. So I 00:06:49.290 --> 00:06:52.290 see her, she sees me, we lock eyes. Mind you, 00:06:52.529 --> 00:06:54.290 we're literally, I don't know, like, I don't 00:06:54.290 --> 00:06:56.410 know, 15 meters away from each other. Like, it 00:06:56.410 --> 00:06:58.889 was like, you were down the street. And we pointed 00:06:58.889 --> 00:07:01.949 at each other like, is that me? Is that you? 00:07:02.009 --> 00:07:03.730 And then we're like, we acknowledge the fact 00:07:03.730 --> 00:07:05.790 that it was us. Mind you, like I said, we haven't 00:07:05.790 --> 00:07:08.689 seen each other. She hasn't seen me. And we literally, 00:07:08.810 --> 00:07:11.910 just like out of a movie, started running. This 00:07:11.910 --> 00:07:15.370 is no lie, Gio can attest to this. we ran to 00:07:15.370 --> 00:07:18.949 each other in slow motion. And I wish I could 00:07:18.949 --> 00:07:22.790 insert that song, like the do, do, do, do, do. 00:07:22.949 --> 00:07:25.589 Like, it was like that. Running to each other 00:07:25.589 --> 00:07:29.750 in slow motion. And in between that job to each 00:07:29.750 --> 00:07:32.129 other, there's a guy looking at us like, what 00:07:32.129 --> 00:07:35.069 the hell is going on? Like, do you guys know 00:07:35.069 --> 00:07:38.689 each other? And I was just like, no, we don't. 00:07:38.790 --> 00:07:40.589 It's the first time. This is our first interaction. 00:07:40.949 --> 00:07:44.120 And then that's how we Yeah, that's how we first 00:07:44.120 --> 00:07:46.379 saw each other. And then since we couldn't go 00:07:46.379 --> 00:07:49.879 to the cafe, we decided to walk around Geo's 00:07:49.879 --> 00:07:52.980 neighborhood and we walked for a minute. We walked 00:07:52.980 --> 00:07:56.600 for like two hours. We walked around my neighborhood 00:07:56.600 --> 00:08:00.500 arm -in -arm. Yeah, yeah, yeah. For like an hour. 00:08:00.540 --> 00:08:04.180 I just met her 15 minutes ago and we're locked 00:08:04.180 --> 00:08:08.319 arms, skipping deedle -ee -dee down the street 00:08:08.319 --> 00:08:10.959 like we met each other a million times before. 00:08:11.240 --> 00:08:13.220 And then, and then... Then she had to listen 00:08:13.220 --> 00:08:16.100 to my barrage of things I can and cannot eat. 00:08:16.439 --> 00:08:19.240 She starts getting upset, like, what do you eat? 00:08:19.540 --> 00:08:21.699 Meanwhile, my chubby self is like, I don't need 00:08:21.699 --> 00:08:23.959 this, and I don't need that. Zio is not chubby, 00:08:24.100 --> 00:08:26.300 guys, just let you know, he's not. I'm chubby. 00:08:27.079 --> 00:08:32.019 I am a chubby woman. And it's all in vain, but 00:08:32.019 --> 00:08:34.779 I'm like, I need breadless, I need seedless, 00:08:34.960 --> 00:08:38.659 I need, what am I, what do I need? I need everything, 00:08:38.779 --> 00:08:43.559 what? It's weird. Air. Like she had said to me, 00:08:43.639 --> 00:08:45.399 I think it was like coming after like, it was 00:08:45.399 --> 00:08:48.620 like definitely coming to seven or after seven. 00:08:48.679 --> 00:08:52.159 All I can remember Gio saying was, ah, it's too 00:08:52.159 --> 00:08:53.460 late. Like I was supposed to eat before seven 00:08:53.460 --> 00:08:55.639 o 'clock, ah, it's too late. So I'm like, okay, 00:08:55.720 --> 00:08:57.279 like, yo, like let's go get you something to 00:08:57.279 --> 00:08:58.700 eat. Like, you're going to be okay? Like, are 00:08:58.700 --> 00:09:00.500 you going to have convulsions? Like what's happening? 00:09:01.039 --> 00:09:04.879 And we ended up going to this burger spot by 00:09:04.879 --> 00:09:07.159 our house. I can't remember. Something cool. 00:09:07.240 --> 00:09:10.580 I'm so sorry, Hamburg, I don't remember. And 00:09:10.580 --> 00:09:12.279 we ordered burgers, but the food is actually 00:09:12.279 --> 00:09:16.480 really good though. So we order our burgers, 00:09:17.059 --> 00:09:22.259 and this girl proceeds to eat the burger, bunless. 00:09:23.440 --> 00:09:27.360 No buns, no top, no bottom. Why is that so funny? 00:09:28.059 --> 00:09:33.840 Just bunless. No buns. And mind you guys, remember, 00:09:33.919 --> 00:09:35.559 this is the first time I'm meeting her now, so 00:09:35.559 --> 00:09:39.009 I'm trying to be a no judgment zone. just trying 00:09:39.009 --> 00:09:41.730 to act like this is completely normal. She ate 00:09:41.730 --> 00:09:44.830 the burger, just the meat. That's it. That's 00:09:44.830 --> 00:09:47.309 all she did. And that's all she wrote, guys. 00:09:47.470 --> 00:09:49.750 That's all she wrote. That's all she wrote. Fantastic. 00:09:50.490 --> 00:09:53.690 Fantastic recollection. I love that story. I 00:09:53.690 --> 00:09:55.769 went home. I told my husband. I met this girl. 00:09:55.789 --> 00:09:59.220 She's awesome. She's like... a younger me in 00:09:59.220 --> 00:10:01.960 some ways, and I loved her completely. It was 00:10:01.960 --> 00:10:05.200 really, really cool. I really appreciate, like, 00:10:05.340 --> 00:10:07.720 I felt blessed that I met your husband that day, 00:10:07.820 --> 00:10:10.519 the way we met, or else we wouldn't know each 00:10:10.519 --> 00:10:12.259 other today. We wouldn't be doing this right 00:10:12.259 --> 00:10:15.620 now. I know. We say all that to say welcome, 00:10:15.820 --> 00:10:20.120 Jay, to That's Not The Point podcast. We're so 00:10:20.120 --> 00:10:24.100 happy to have her here. We do. We're going to 00:10:24.100 --> 00:10:28.480 insert that. We're going to get her. A guy, a 00:10:28.480 --> 00:10:30.259 tech? We're gonna get a guy. He's gonna, yeah. 00:10:30.559 --> 00:10:32.120 And he's gonna do all that tech stuff that you 00:10:32.120 --> 00:10:34.440 guys wanna hear going forward. We need this tech 00:10:34.440 --> 00:10:39.279 stuff, right? Email us if you want to be that 00:10:39.279 --> 00:10:44.080 tech guy. But no, I wanted Jay to be on this 00:10:44.080 --> 00:10:48.500 podcast for a long time. We just are timing our 00:10:48.500 --> 00:10:52.000 schedules, everything like that. And now she's 00:10:52.000 --> 00:10:55.100 here and we're doing it and she has a new addition 00:10:55.100 --> 00:10:58.419 in her life And I want to know about that. I 00:10:58.419 --> 00:11:00.820 want to know about how she's navigating through 00:11:00.820 --> 00:11:06.139 parenthood marriage and me Navigating through 00:11:06.139 --> 00:11:11.600 just marriage by itself and just Life and just 00:11:11.600 --> 00:11:14.299 life and how you know moving to Germany how that's 00:11:14.299 --> 00:11:16.000 changed your life because although we've known 00:11:16.000 --> 00:11:18.240 each other for a couple of years now We kind 00:11:18.240 --> 00:11:20.659 of like text each other pretty often, but it's 00:11:20.659 --> 00:11:22.659 just like day to day conversation. Like, what 00:11:22.659 --> 00:11:24.419 are you doing today? What's going on? It's always 00:11:24.419 --> 00:11:27.539 present. Um, but I do want to get to know more 00:11:27.539 --> 00:11:30.980 of Geo's life before Germany and how that was. 00:11:31.100 --> 00:11:33.519 And obviously how she came about and coming to, 00:11:33.519 --> 00:11:37.200 to Hamburg and how she got here. So I'm excited. 00:11:37.460 --> 00:11:39.799 Me too. Me too. Yeah. That's why we're calling 00:11:39.799 --> 00:11:43.860 this, uh, episode chance encounters because you, 00:11:43.980 --> 00:11:45.379 sometimes you have to make that chance, right? 00:11:45.379 --> 00:11:48.059 You have to take that chance with people and, 00:11:48.559 --> 00:11:51.259 uh, Extend yourself out and see what comes of 00:11:51.259 --> 00:11:54.019 it. I loved it I loved that I was able to do 00:11:54.019 --> 00:11:56.360 that that day with her husband and I love that 00:11:56.360 --> 00:11:59.259 he connected us and we've been like pretty close 00:11:59.259 --> 00:12:04.360 ever since and Yeah, yeah, it was it was it was 00:12:04.360 --> 00:12:05.840 a good experience and I'm glad that we're doing 00:12:05.840 --> 00:12:08.840 that today So I want you guys to get to know 00:12:08.840 --> 00:12:12.559 Jay a little bit more. I want to know how and 00:12:12.559 --> 00:12:16.799 why you moved to Germany. What inspired you? 00:12:17.320 --> 00:12:20.179 How was that transition for you? Are you cool 00:12:20.179 --> 00:12:23.200 with that? Yeah, for sure. So let me start off 00:12:23.200 --> 00:12:26.139 by saying, no, I wasn't inspired to move to Germany 00:12:26.139 --> 00:12:29.159 at all. I'm sorry to the fellow Germans here, 00:12:29.240 --> 00:12:32.559 but I was not inspired to move here at all. I 00:12:32.559 --> 00:12:36.980 came here for love. Okay, my husband he is also 00:12:36.980 --> 00:12:41.000 from Toronto and so he's been in Germany since 00:12:41.000 --> 00:12:47.159 2014 and we were dating since 2015 So yeah, this 00:12:47.159 --> 00:12:49.639 year will be 10 years since we've been together 00:12:49.639 --> 00:12:54.220 as we started dating This was my late 20s. I'm 00:12:54.220 --> 00:12:57.340 not trying to give my age, but it's my late 20s 00:12:57.340 --> 00:13:01.299 Yeah, I was I hate if my husband was to hear 00:13:01.299 --> 00:13:02.899 this because he would feel so nice about himself, 00:13:03.220 --> 00:13:04.519 but I was a little bit smitten. I'm not going 00:13:04.519 --> 00:13:07.360 to lie. I was super into him, super into him. 00:13:07.460 --> 00:13:10.220 And he was pretty much like, I'm going to be 00:13:10.220 --> 00:13:12.740 going to Germany and I play basketball there. 00:13:13.100 --> 00:13:15.700 So this would be like a long distance ting. Sorry, 00:13:15.840 --> 00:13:18.440 guys, just to say. Because I'm from Toronto, 00:13:18.559 --> 00:13:20.399 you're going to hear a lot of different things 00:13:20.399 --> 00:13:22.379 going on. You might hear a little bit of Jamaican. 00:13:22.480 --> 00:13:24.080 You might hear a little bit of Barbados. You're 00:13:24.080 --> 00:13:27.279 going to hear some Denglish probably, some German 00:13:27.279 --> 00:13:28.940 and English. You're going to hear a lot of stuff. 00:13:29.279 --> 00:13:32.120 So I say ting means thing, just to give you guys 00:13:32.120 --> 00:13:36.559 a little background. So we would have to do the 00:13:36.559 --> 00:13:38.519 long distance relationship. That's pretty much 00:13:38.519 --> 00:13:41.379 what he said. So I've never done it before. So 00:13:41.379 --> 00:13:43.720 I thought... Mike, could this be so difficult? 00:13:43.860 --> 00:13:48.159 Let me give it a try, right? And yeah, so the 00:13:48.159 --> 00:13:51.480 first couple months, he was in Germany, I was 00:13:51.480 --> 00:13:54.860 in Toronto, and I came to visit him, I think 00:13:54.860 --> 00:13:58.840 three months after we started dating, and that 00:13:58.840 --> 00:14:02.000 was my first experience coming to Germany. And 00:14:02.000 --> 00:14:04.440 I remember telling my dad that I was coming out 00:14:04.440 --> 00:14:06.980 here and he thought it was crazy, one, to come 00:14:06.980 --> 00:14:10.120 meet a man all the way in Germany, and two, because 00:14:10.120 --> 00:14:15.059 I was coming to Germany. So he was, no, could 00:14:15.059 --> 00:14:17.100 only be as supportive as much as he could. And 00:14:17.100 --> 00:14:20.259 he said, okay, go out, be safe. So when I came 00:14:20.259 --> 00:14:24.159 out here, yeah, I honestly didn't know what to 00:14:24.159 --> 00:14:27.919 expect. To be honest, a lot of people have... 00:14:28.029 --> 00:14:34.029 or still have the misconception of Germany being 00:14:34.029 --> 00:14:37.629 a racist country or the people aren't good here, 00:14:38.250 --> 00:14:40.789 which is further from the truth. Germany obviously 00:14:40.789 --> 00:14:44.590 has its areas where there are some special people, 00:14:44.649 --> 00:14:48.350 let's just put it that way, special people with 00:14:48.350 --> 00:14:52.639 different opinions as we do, and that's... Not 00:14:52.639 --> 00:14:55.100 okay, but you know, we're gonna continue to move 00:14:55.100 --> 00:14:59.159 forward, okay? So yeah, so I came out here and 00:14:59.159 --> 00:15:03.460 we, where were we? We were first in the NRV. 00:15:03.960 --> 00:15:06.200 So for anybody that is familiar with Germany, 00:15:07.000 --> 00:15:11.139 this is in the area of Düsseldorf, Dortmund. 00:15:11.679 --> 00:15:15.620 So we were in a small area, in this area. So 00:15:15.620 --> 00:15:19.029 yeah, so we... hung out. We got to get to know 00:15:19.029 --> 00:15:20.990 each other a bit more. So we decided to continue 00:15:20.990 --> 00:15:24.309 the relationship. And I came out several times 00:15:24.309 --> 00:15:27.830 to Germany after that. And at this point, I was 00:15:27.830 --> 00:15:29.549 missing out on Barbados. I would usually go to 00:15:29.549 --> 00:15:32.450 Barbados every single year. But the flight to 00:15:32.450 --> 00:15:35.470 Germany is not cheap. So it was one or the other. 00:15:35.769 --> 00:15:38.509 Put Barbados in the back burner. Yeah, come on. 00:15:39.389 --> 00:15:50.379 Yeah. Yeah. A grayer climate. It is it is it 00:15:50.379 --> 00:15:53.100 is and I actually I haven't been to Barbados 00:15:53.100 --> 00:15:55.919 for I don't know seven or eight years now because 00:15:55.919 --> 00:15:59.980 I kept coming out to to Germany to visit so Yeah, 00:16:00.000 --> 00:16:04.460 so fast forward now four years later I was like, 00:16:04.480 --> 00:16:05.840 all right, man, like, what are we, what are we 00:16:05.840 --> 00:16:07.899 doing? What's, what's happening here? Cause four 00:16:07.899 --> 00:16:11.879 years of long distance is a long time. Um, and 00:16:11.879 --> 00:16:15.460 my partner was not ready to move back to Canada. 00:16:15.620 --> 00:16:17.039 He's like, oh, I'm not ready. Like I still want 00:16:17.039 --> 00:16:19.720 to, um, I still want to be out here in Germany. 00:16:20.059 --> 00:16:23.659 And I was like, ah, all right. So then I had 00:16:23.659 --> 00:16:26.620 to then make the decision. Do we continue this 00:16:26.620 --> 00:16:31.500 love boat? Or do I hop off and I stayed on and 00:16:31.500 --> 00:16:34.240 I took that love boat to Germany. So this is 00:16:34.240 --> 00:16:36.679 where I'm at now. You said love boat. I love 00:16:36.679 --> 00:16:39.460 that. That's really funny. But let me ask you, 00:16:39.820 --> 00:16:43.179 what were the biggest cultural adjustments when 00:16:43.179 --> 00:16:46.039 you first got here? What did you notice that 00:16:46.039 --> 00:16:49.360 was different from back home? So I will say, 00:16:50.000 --> 00:16:53.039 at least when it comes to Caribbean people, Caribbean 00:16:53.039 --> 00:16:57.500 time is a thing. It's a thing. we're always late 00:16:57.500 --> 00:17:00.460 all the time. And that is one thing that the 00:17:00.460 --> 00:17:01.799 Germans don't play about. They don't play about 00:17:01.799 --> 00:17:04.140 time. If they say three o 'clock, it's three 00:17:04.140 --> 00:17:06.779 o 'clock or 15 o 'clock. When they say it's three 00:17:06.779 --> 00:17:08.660 o 'clock, it's three o 'clock. And that was something 00:17:08.660 --> 00:17:11.720 I had to adjust to. Now, mind you, like my job, 00:17:11.740 --> 00:17:14.279 I'm always on time. But then everything outside 00:17:14.279 --> 00:17:16.039 of that, like, you know, hey girl, come meet 00:17:16.039 --> 00:17:18.440 me at the cafe. Like, can we be a little bit 00:17:18.440 --> 00:17:22.440 relaxed? Be on the minute? Or it's like, obviously 00:17:22.440 --> 00:17:23.779 you got to go there like a little bit earlier. 00:17:24.059 --> 00:17:27.440 That was an adjustment for me. And yeah, that's 00:17:27.440 --> 00:17:31.079 something that I had to adjust to. And what else? 00:17:31.359 --> 00:17:35.000 I will say that I am pretty punctual. I will. 00:17:36.240 --> 00:17:38.720 I am. I always have been. Sorry listeners, I 00:17:38.720 --> 00:17:40.259 wish you guys could see my face right now. That 00:17:40.259 --> 00:17:43.619 is a lie. I am pretty punctual. You are always 00:17:43.619 --> 00:17:47.519 late. I am 15 minutes early. To where everybody 00:17:47.519 --> 00:17:50.000 thinks the time is supposed to be. Yeah. Right? 00:17:50.680 --> 00:17:52.779 She makes up the times in her head and then she 00:17:52.779 --> 00:17:54.539 thinks she gets there 15 minutes earlier. But 00:17:54.539 --> 00:17:57.450 she's always late. Every time. I know, I beg 00:17:57.450 --> 00:18:00.069 to differ, I beg to differ. I feel as if I am 00:18:00.069 --> 00:18:02.710 quite punctual, to be honest. No, but that was 00:18:02.710 --> 00:18:04.630 a big shock for me here too. Like if you're going 00:18:04.630 --> 00:18:07.150 to a dinner party or something like that, people 00:18:07.150 --> 00:18:09.309 at the restaurants sitting down already and I'm 00:18:09.309 --> 00:18:12.190 like really just walking in. I try to be fashionably 00:18:12.190 --> 00:18:14.970 laid and... They don't do that. No. They don't 00:18:14.970 --> 00:18:16.750 do the fashionable, they don't do the laid. No, 00:18:16.849 --> 00:18:19.930 no. I did learn that. But I'm good at a doctor's 00:18:19.930 --> 00:18:21.940 appointment. This I've always been good at. Right? 00:18:22.099 --> 00:18:24.700 You too. It's not a crook. Working's job's cool, 00:18:24.799 --> 00:18:26.240 but like, if I'm just showing up to a dinner, 00:18:26.640 --> 00:18:29.480 like, come on, man. I know. I did, I learned 00:18:29.480 --> 00:18:31.119 that the hard way, just getting glances from 00:18:31.119 --> 00:18:33.240 people, like, you're late. So I get it. I get 00:18:33.240 --> 00:18:37.019 it completely. So, so what else are you learning 00:18:37.019 --> 00:18:39.960 from, have you learned from German culture as 00:18:39.960 --> 00:18:43.079 opposed to back home? Ooh, the second thing, 00:18:43.279 --> 00:18:47.359 after punctuality, I would say... This whole 00:18:47.359 --> 00:18:49.960 direct communication thing a lot of people say 00:18:49.960 --> 00:18:53.119 that germs are super direct I was talking to 00:18:53.119 --> 00:18:55.240 my husband about this the other day and I was 00:18:55.240 --> 00:18:56.920 like, I don't think they're very direct He's 00:18:56.920 --> 00:18:58.539 like, no, that's how you like it is. I'm like 00:18:58.539 --> 00:19:02.559 why I haven't had that happen to me until I remembered 00:19:02.559 --> 00:19:06.539 the story when I first moved here and the job 00:19:06.539 --> 00:19:10.279 that I was working at I So, you know, I'm a black 00:19:10.279 --> 00:19:13.569 girl. I have curly hair and I decided to leave 00:19:13.569 --> 00:19:16.410 my hair out one day. So I went to work and my 00:19:16.410 --> 00:19:19.549 boss's wife said to me, oh, in German, I won't 00:19:19.549 --> 00:19:22.109 say it in German, just to make it easy for y 00:19:22.109 --> 00:19:24.569 'all, but she basically said, oh, your hair looks 00:19:24.569 --> 00:19:30.329 so funny. No. Yeah. I just smacked my own mouth. 00:19:32.750 --> 00:19:39.730 I was like, oh, your hair looks so funny. And 00:19:39.730 --> 00:19:44.029 I was like, oh, okay. Like I had no idea. I was 00:19:44.029 --> 00:19:47.109 so shocked because I had no idea how to react. 00:19:47.190 --> 00:19:48.789 I'm like, did she really just say my hair looks 00:19:48.789 --> 00:19:52.109 funny? And I just, I think my response was like, 00:19:52.170 --> 00:19:53.849 yeah, look, this is my hair. Like when I leave 00:19:53.849 --> 00:19:55.930 it out, like this is how it looks. You know, 00:19:55.930 --> 00:19:57.369 and then she kind of like didn't say anything 00:19:57.369 --> 00:20:02.380 after that. And I feel like Living here, when 00:20:02.380 --> 00:20:05.380 people say certain things about, you know, how 00:20:05.380 --> 00:20:08.180 you look, your hair, whatever, skin tone, I don't 00:20:08.180 --> 00:20:11.180 know what. For me, sometimes I'm always on this 00:20:11.180 --> 00:20:12.819 fence of whether I'm like, do I need to check 00:20:12.819 --> 00:20:15.500 you and educate you, or do I just let it slide? 00:20:15.559 --> 00:20:17.920 Because I'm like, I don't have the energy to 00:20:17.920 --> 00:20:20.539 explain or like express to you that that's not 00:20:20.539 --> 00:20:22.599 something that's okay to say. Have you ever had 00:20:22.599 --> 00:20:27.019 that? I experience that more in the States than 00:20:27.019 --> 00:20:31.309 I have. Here yes people would say something like 00:20:31.309 --> 00:20:33.349 that like oh, you know about your hair about 00:20:33.349 --> 00:20:35.990 your clothing or not clothing But I found here 00:20:35.990 --> 00:20:39.410 that people are more respectful of your personal 00:20:39.410 --> 00:20:43.190 space Yes, I mean, you know, my husband's German 00:20:43.190 --> 00:20:45.970 his family Nobody comments on people's looks 00:20:45.970 --> 00:20:47.950 unless you look really beautiful You're like 00:20:47.950 --> 00:20:49.529 you have a bunch of makeup on or whatever the 00:20:49.529 --> 00:20:52.230 case is your dress is extra Spectacular, but 00:20:52.230 --> 00:20:55.109 nobody really comments on your looks in a negative 00:20:55.109 --> 00:20:58.359 way. I've never experienced that Not once. And 00:20:58.359 --> 00:21:02.400 I love that about Europeans as opposed to maybe 00:21:02.400 --> 00:21:04.519 culturally, like from my culture, we're very 00:21:04.519 --> 00:21:10.539 judgmental. But I found here that people kind 00:21:10.539 --> 00:21:13.339 of just let it be. I mean, I don't know for your 00:21:13.339 --> 00:21:15.880 Caribbean, but Haitians, if you gain weight or 00:21:15.880 --> 00:21:17.460 something like that, we're very quick to tell 00:21:17.460 --> 00:21:20.539 you that you gain weight. For sure. I have not 00:21:20.539 --> 00:21:22.960 experienced that. I fluctuate all the time. If 00:21:22.960 --> 00:21:25.420 I happen to lose a certain amount of weight at 00:21:25.420 --> 00:21:27.460 that time, someone will say something really 00:21:27.460 --> 00:21:29.359 positive, but no one's gonna be like, oh, you 00:21:29.359 --> 00:21:32.380 gained weight. I've never, I've never heard that. 00:21:32.400 --> 00:21:34.539 But your auntie or your uncle, like if you're 00:21:34.539 --> 00:21:36.680 at a family function, they'd be like, hey, hey. 00:21:36.680 --> 00:21:40.119 They might pinch you. They might pinch you where 00:21:40.119 --> 00:21:43.380 the fat is to let you know that's the fat I'm 00:21:43.380 --> 00:21:45.519 talking about. Right, right. Right here. Yeah, 00:21:45.660 --> 00:21:47.599 that's the thing. Yeah, okay. So yeah, I would 00:21:47.599 --> 00:21:50.299 say like, Caribbean culture wise I think our 00:21:50.299 --> 00:21:53.140 own family can also be like major critics of 00:21:53.140 --> 00:21:54.880 us I feel like they just feel like they could 00:21:54.880 --> 00:21:57.160 do that because their families like what are 00:21:57.160 --> 00:21:59.200 you gonna do? You little girl like they expect 00:21:59.200 --> 00:22:01.700 us and they like I raised you I mean since you're 00:22:01.700 --> 00:22:03.500 in diapers I can say what I want to say and it's 00:22:03.500 --> 00:22:06.619 like no you can't you can't it can be hurtful 00:22:06.619 --> 00:22:08.960 No, it can be I can't it can be and I think I 00:22:08.960 --> 00:22:11.160 think slowly but surely people from the Caribbean 00:22:11.160 --> 00:22:13.910 are starting to learn on some level that you 00:22:13.910 --> 00:22:16.309 cannot criticize people's looks. I think we're 00:22:16.309 --> 00:22:18.490 like the last people to do it. Yeah. I think 00:22:18.490 --> 00:22:20.630 for sure. On the planet. Yeah. It's just something 00:22:20.630 --> 00:22:22.430 that we're just not accustomed to do it and it's 00:22:22.430 --> 00:22:25.109 not coming from a place of hate or they just 00:22:25.109 --> 00:22:27.609 want you to be your best and they feel like if 00:22:27.609 --> 00:22:29.049 they're family and they're telling you maybe 00:22:29.049 --> 00:22:31.849 the rest of the world won't have to tell you. 00:22:31.849 --> 00:22:33.869 Won't have to. Right. Maybe that's their logic. 00:22:34.170 --> 00:22:37.430 I have no idea. I think that's interesting. That's 00:22:37.430 --> 00:22:39.529 crazy. Yeah. I was so shocked. I was super shocked. 00:22:40.219 --> 00:22:43.519 And I've actually had another, my second job, 00:22:44.579 --> 00:22:46.680 I've had people like touch my hair. Like sometimes 00:22:46.680 --> 00:22:48.900 I have my hair up in a bun like it is now. I've 00:22:48.900 --> 00:22:51.539 had people like squeeze my hair like, yeah. And 00:22:51.539 --> 00:22:54.039 see it's like a, like a schwamm. Schwamm is like 00:22:54.039 --> 00:22:57.400 a poof. Yeah, yeah. Oh yeah, yeah. That's what 00:22:57.400 --> 00:23:00.339 my hair feels like. Wow. I know, I know. When 00:23:00.339 --> 00:23:02.259 I get braids, I get braids all the time. It's 00:23:02.259 --> 00:23:05.259 easier for me. I've had people ask me to touch 00:23:05.259 --> 00:23:09.390 my braids. Really? Yeah, no, they haven't asked. 00:23:09.750 --> 00:23:12.250 But I think the problem is because I come across 00:23:12.250 --> 00:23:15.529 such like a cool laid -back person, I think they 00:23:15.529 --> 00:23:16.930 think like, oh, it's okay, like that's cool, 00:23:17.109 --> 00:23:18.890 like Jay's cool. And for the most part, I'm like, 00:23:19.009 --> 00:23:20.750 whatever, like I don't take that stuff to heart 00:23:20.750 --> 00:23:23.109 sometimes, but it's like, if I was a different, 00:23:26.109 --> 00:23:28.809 people might take that differently. So I think 00:23:28.809 --> 00:23:31.309 for me, it's like, Like I said, it's like I'm 00:23:31.309 --> 00:23:33.289 always on that border of, okay, do I address 00:23:33.289 --> 00:23:34.430 that? Because I'm like, you don't want to do 00:23:34.430 --> 00:23:36.210 that to everybody. Some people are cool with 00:23:36.210 --> 00:23:38.309 it and won't say anything because people are 00:23:38.309 --> 00:23:40.369 curious or they just, you know, they want to 00:23:40.369 --> 00:23:43.009 know what your hair feels like, I guess. But 00:23:43.009 --> 00:23:45.289 for me, yeah, that was that was quite shocking. 00:23:45.559 --> 00:23:48.259 I was shocked by that. Yeah, I didn't know how 00:23:48.259 --> 00:23:52.660 to address that. But on a lighter note. Aside 00:23:52.660 --> 00:23:57.119 from that. Aside from punctuality and directness. 00:23:59.779 --> 00:24:03.359 Yeah, no, there hasn't been much, I would say. 00:24:04.420 --> 00:24:06.900 Except for the little things, and this is not 00:24:06.900 --> 00:24:10.019 cultural. Maybe you could say it's a cultural 00:24:10.019 --> 00:24:12.920 thing, because I think Germans are... much different 00:24:12.920 --> 00:24:15.500 when it comes to like conserving food and like 00:24:15.500 --> 00:24:18.640 how they handle that kind of stuff um but the 00:24:18.640 --> 00:24:23.029 refrigerators can someone If anyone is German 00:24:23.029 --> 00:24:25.750 listening to this at some point, please let me 00:24:25.750 --> 00:24:29.170 know what is with the mini refrigerators. Why 00:24:29.170 --> 00:24:31.789 are they so small? And it could be a whole apartment, 00:24:32.049 --> 00:24:34.750 like whole three bedrooms, and you still have 00:24:34.750 --> 00:24:37.569 this mini refrigerator. I don't get it. I learned 00:24:37.569 --> 00:24:40.609 that when I lived in Europe a while ago. I'm 00:24:40.609 --> 00:24:44.289 not telling my age, but I did when I had my first 00:24:44.289 --> 00:24:47.769 long extended time in Europe. I realized that 00:24:47.769 --> 00:24:50.660 that was in Spain. I realized the frigerators 00:24:50.660 --> 00:24:53.200 are much smaller than they are in the states. 00:24:54.220 --> 00:24:56.960 A lot of things are smaller here. Cars often 00:24:56.960 --> 00:25:00.279 are smaller here. It's just the way, especially 00:25:00.279 --> 00:25:02.440 in bigger cities, they just make things smaller 00:25:02.440 --> 00:25:05.359 for some reason. Out in the country, like my 00:25:05.359 --> 00:25:07.299 husband's family lives in the country, and they 00:25:07.299 --> 00:25:09.500 have like a normal size fridge with the two doors 00:25:09.500 --> 00:25:12.819 and the whole thing, which is like more like... 00:25:12.430 --> 00:25:14.690 what I would think is normal for what we know, 00:25:14.829 --> 00:25:18.009 but I think in the city, I think it's just for 00:25:18.009 --> 00:25:21.089 accommodation for smaller apartments or stuff. 00:25:21.450 --> 00:25:24.029 But in the states, in New York, we have like 00:25:24.029 --> 00:25:26.390 closet apartments and still humongous fridges. 00:25:27.369 --> 00:25:29.190 That's an interesting question. It's one person 00:25:29.190 --> 00:25:31.170 living there and you have a huge fridge. Now 00:25:31.170 --> 00:25:34.230 I get that. I do, what I will say is what I learned 00:25:34.230 --> 00:25:37.470 having to live with that mini fridge was that 00:25:37.470 --> 00:25:40.349 I had to be super conscious about going and doing 00:25:40.349 --> 00:25:43.150 groceries, like I couldn't do a whole batch of 00:25:43.150 --> 00:25:45.049 groceries because I knew, oh, that stuff wasn't 00:25:45.049 --> 00:25:48.009 fitting in the fridge, right? That was my thing 00:25:48.009 --> 00:25:49.930 where I learned, I'm like, okay. And I think 00:25:49.930 --> 00:25:53.569 too, it kind of also controls my spending because 00:25:53.569 --> 00:25:55.769 I don't feel like I'm going to buy every single 00:25:55.769 --> 00:25:57.529 little thing that might be on sale at the grocery 00:25:57.529 --> 00:26:00.309 store because they can't fit in the fridge. Well, 00:26:00.309 --> 00:26:05.549 let me ask you, Jay, how has your Caribbean or 00:26:05.549 --> 00:26:08.890 your Canadian roots, the aspects of that, has 00:26:08.890 --> 00:26:12.650 that shaped your living or culture here? No, 00:26:12.650 --> 00:26:16.529 what I will say is in terms of like my perspective 00:26:16.529 --> 00:26:19.710 on how I see life in Germany now compared to 00:26:19.710 --> 00:26:23.730 living back in Toronto, growing up there's always 00:26:23.730 --> 00:26:27.089 this pressure, I would say at least family pressure 00:26:27.089 --> 00:26:32.210 of like having to be successful. And I feel like 00:26:32.210 --> 00:26:34.289 I don't notice there's so much pressure to be 00:26:34.289 --> 00:26:37.900 successful here and maybe that's just I don't 00:26:37.900 --> 00:26:39.000 know if it's the school system, I don't know 00:26:39.000 --> 00:26:42.259 what it is exactly, but in Canada, and maybe 00:26:42.259 --> 00:26:46.160 you can also say for you as well, Gio, but growing 00:26:46.160 --> 00:26:48.460 up, it was like, hey, be a doctor, be a lawyer. 00:26:48.980 --> 00:26:50.339 And then after that, it's like, oh, you have 00:26:50.339 --> 00:26:53.039 to buy a house, you have to own a car, you have 00:26:53.039 --> 00:26:56.299 to have all these materialistic things to show 00:26:56.299 --> 00:27:00.599 what success is. And I felt a lot of that pressure 00:27:00.599 --> 00:27:05.660 coming towards my... late 20s to early 30s and 00:27:05.660 --> 00:27:07.819 this also transition of being with someone in 00:27:07.819 --> 00:27:10.460 a long distance relationship. I was feeling that 00:27:10.460 --> 00:27:12.059 pressure because I already had some friends that 00:27:12.059 --> 00:27:14.819 had already owned their house by the age of like 00:27:14.819 --> 00:27:19.359 26, already had their car. So you feel that pressure 00:27:19.359 --> 00:27:22.299 a little bit. Whereas I would say when I moved 00:27:22.299 --> 00:27:25.019 here, I lost all that. I didn't feel that pressure 00:27:25.019 --> 00:27:27.460 like I have to own a car or I have to have the 00:27:27.460 --> 00:27:29.720 nicest car or I have to have a big house. I never 00:27:29.720 --> 00:27:33.910 felt that. Yeah. No, no, I completely agree because 00:27:33.910 --> 00:27:35.910 also i'm older than you older than you and I 00:27:35.910 --> 00:27:38.089 came here older and I had a couple of those things 00:27:38.089 --> 00:27:42.769 Before but I also noticed that when like my first 00:27:42.769 --> 00:27:47.210 go -around living in europe the pressure to um 00:27:47.210 --> 00:27:50.910 To succeed I guess quote unquote succeed I noticed 00:27:50.910 --> 00:27:52.930 that as well I noticed like someone who works 00:27:52.930 --> 00:27:55.769 in a bakery and has a good life and they're doing 00:27:55.769 --> 00:27:58.950 what they do they're satisfied and complete and 00:27:58.950 --> 00:28:02.140 but I also think culturally it's like a first 00:28:02.140 --> 00:28:05.099 generation type thing. Your parents leave their 00:28:05.099 --> 00:28:08.279 country and they go to like. America or North 00:28:08.279 --> 00:28:12.720 America and they need you to Represent for them 00:28:12.720 --> 00:28:15.259 and have a big life to show that they what they 00:28:15.259 --> 00:28:19.980 did was worth it I did not move to Canada for 00:28:19.980 --> 00:28:22.500 nothing. Exactly. You didn't just not go to school 00:28:22.500 --> 00:28:24.500 or that's a very good point I actually never 00:28:24.500 --> 00:28:27.359 thought of it that way Yeah, I just kind of thought 00:28:27.359 --> 00:28:29.259 of it as yeah, my parents just wanted to have 00:28:29.259 --> 00:28:31.779 successful children But I do see that standpoint 00:28:31.779 --> 00:28:33.839 in terms of them leaving somewhere to go somewhere 00:28:33.839 --> 00:28:36.880 else like to give they would say a better opportunity 00:28:36.880 --> 00:28:41.680 for us as first generation kids. No, that's actually 00:28:41.680 --> 00:28:45.079 good. No, it's really all across the board. No, 00:28:45.079 --> 00:28:47.400 it doesn't matter which country you're from. 00:28:47.539 --> 00:28:50.660 There's a pressure on first generation children 00:28:50.660 --> 00:28:52.819 to achieve certain things that the parents never 00:28:52.819 --> 00:28:54.640 saw for themselves. And they put a lot of pressure 00:28:54.640 --> 00:28:57.160 on you. And it really doesn't matter. I'm talking 00:28:57.160 --> 00:29:00.319 about the states. It really doesn't matter where 00:29:00.319 --> 00:29:03.099 you come from. They still feel that amount of 00:29:03.099 --> 00:29:05.480 pressure in certain levels. I feel like it's 00:29:05.480 --> 00:29:07.940 less over the years, but definitely something 00:29:07.940 --> 00:29:11.039 that I felt growing up as well. Also another 00:29:11.039 --> 00:29:14.839 thing, we live in the city. And in the city here, 00:29:15.319 --> 00:29:18.779 there are a lot of newcomers, a lot of migrants 00:29:18.779 --> 00:29:21.240 or people who come from different countries here. 00:29:21.240 --> 00:29:24.579 And your level of where you are educational wise 00:29:24.579 --> 00:29:27.660 or socially wise or anything like that differs. 00:29:28.019 --> 00:29:30.400 So what your friend is doing on the left may 00:29:30.400 --> 00:29:32.380 not be what your friend is doing on the right. 00:29:32.539 --> 00:29:34.759 And so you have to kind of meet them where they 00:29:34.759 --> 00:29:36.240 are. They just got here. They don't know the 00:29:36.240 --> 00:29:37.779 language. They don't have a job. They don't have 00:29:37.779 --> 00:29:40.000 this. So I think it makes people a little bit 00:29:40.000 --> 00:29:42.890 more tolerant. I know when I lived... in the 00:29:42.890 --> 00:29:46.349 city in New York, you know, I had friends with 00:29:46.349 --> 00:29:48.670 all different levels of income, which is different 00:29:48.670 --> 00:29:50.849 from the suburbs. You know, from the suburbs, 00:29:51.049 --> 00:29:53.529 they expect you to live suburbian life. You know 00:29:53.529 --> 00:29:56.329 what I mean? Like a dog and a fence and the house. 00:29:56.990 --> 00:29:59.029 So once you get to the city, you'll have some 00:29:59.029 --> 00:30:00.349 friends who actually have a lot of money and 00:30:00.349 --> 00:30:04.009 they prefer to rent. So, you know, and just the 00:30:04.009 --> 00:30:05.549 living is different, but because we live in the 00:30:05.549 --> 00:30:08.220 city, it's just a little bit... more friendly 00:30:08.220 --> 00:30:10.599 to that aspect. I think when you get further 00:30:10.599 --> 00:30:13.660 out into the country or further out into suburban 00:30:13.660 --> 00:30:15.799 life, I think those expectations are a little 00:30:15.799 --> 00:30:21.599 bit higher. It's an assumption. I would say, 00:30:21.880 --> 00:30:23.640 or what someone mentioned to me, which I thought 00:30:23.640 --> 00:30:27.000 was also interesting was that they thought instead 00:30:27.000 --> 00:30:30.440 of investing in property, in Hamburg because 00:30:30.440 --> 00:30:32.059 this person's from Hamburg they said you know 00:30:32.059 --> 00:30:34.119 what I'd rather just buy a house in Spain or 00:30:34.119 --> 00:30:36.859 Italy so then that way you know my summer vacations 00:30:36.859 --> 00:30:39.059 I'm out of Hamburg and I'm going to Spain and 00:30:39.059 --> 00:30:41.839 I have my property there which makes a lot of 00:30:41.839 --> 00:30:44.039 sense instead of investing here because if anyone 00:30:44.039 --> 00:30:46.119 lives in Hamburg they know a lot of the times 00:30:46.119 --> 00:30:49.240 out of the year it's very gray very rainy so 00:30:49.240 --> 00:30:51.759 it's like I would say that is a good investment 00:30:51.759 --> 00:30:53.519 to say, you know what, I'm tired of this weather. 00:30:53.660 --> 00:30:55.500 Let me just fly over to Spain real quick, you 00:30:55.500 --> 00:30:57.980 know, for a weekend. I have my house there, you 00:30:57.980 --> 00:31:00.200 know. Yeah, I have a lot of friends with summer 00:31:00.200 --> 00:31:03.339 homes all over Spain and Italy and things like 00:31:03.339 --> 00:31:07.480 that. I visited a home over the summer. It was 00:31:07.480 --> 00:31:10.890 great in Spain. you know they they put everything 00:31:10.890 --> 00:31:14.529 into that house and as soon as um their son finishes 00:31:14.529 --> 00:31:16.950 uh school that's where they're moving permanently 00:31:16.950 --> 00:31:20.710 and i get it um the the weather here can be brutal 00:31:20.710 --> 00:31:23.049 it could be really brutal in the winter and a 00:31:23.049 --> 00:31:26.490 lot of rain but the city is amazing don't don't 00:31:26.490 --> 00:31:34.109 it's a great city it reminds me a lot of um toronto 00:31:34.109 --> 00:31:36.369 just because it's like a large metropolitan city 00:31:36.369 --> 00:31:39.970 and it is I would say pretty diverse. One of 00:31:39.970 --> 00:31:43.009 the most diverse cities in Germany. But yeah, 00:31:43.630 --> 00:31:45.309 like Hamburg is a great city. It's just the weather 00:31:45.309 --> 00:31:47.509 can be challenging. That's something that I also 00:31:47.509 --> 00:31:52.009 had to adjust to. But I also think it's case 00:31:52.009 --> 00:31:54.150 by case or based off the individual. Because 00:31:54.150 --> 00:31:56.630 if you just have a positive outlook on life, 00:31:56.930 --> 00:31:58.809 most people probably won't allow the weather 00:31:58.809 --> 00:32:01.769 to deter them or affect them in any way. And 00:32:01.769 --> 00:32:04.009 I felt like when I first moved here, I was that 00:32:04.009 --> 00:32:09.059 way. Rain, who cares? No sun for two weeks, who 00:32:09.059 --> 00:32:12.700 cares? So I think it's also, you know, just your 00:32:12.700 --> 00:32:15.859 outlook on life as well, too, right? But I can 00:32:15.859 --> 00:32:17.660 see over time for people how it would be like, 00:32:17.740 --> 00:32:19.720 it can be a little bit daunting at times. But 00:32:19.720 --> 00:32:22.079 other than that, it's a great city to live in. 00:32:22.400 --> 00:32:28.660 Summers are great. People are on road. No, I 00:32:28.660 --> 00:32:30.880 mean the days are very long in the summer like 00:32:30.880 --> 00:32:33.759 the sun sets so so late It's beautiful. It's 00:32:33.759 --> 00:32:37.480 a beautiful time. I love it So let me ask you 00:32:37.480 --> 00:32:40.579 yeah between you and and your husband and your 00:32:40.579 --> 00:32:44.740 cultural combined life What do you think? Do 00:32:44.740 --> 00:32:46.400 you think you're gonna have differences with 00:32:46.400 --> 00:32:49.799 your child in the future as far as like her new 00:32:49.799 --> 00:32:54.049 now adapted? German culture versus your Caribbean, 00:32:54.049 --> 00:32:57.410 uh, Toronto roots. Do you think it's going to 00:32:57.410 --> 00:33:01.150 be so much of a difference or? Ooh, that's a 00:33:01.150 --> 00:33:05.349 good question. I feel like we haven't. Girl, 00:33:05.769 --> 00:33:07.470 this little baby's four months, so I'm still 00:33:07.470 --> 00:33:09.210 trying to get my life together, figuring that 00:33:09.210 --> 00:33:13.369 out. But I think, yeah, no, my partner and I, 00:33:13.369 --> 00:33:15.910 we've talked a lot about how we're going to navigate 00:33:15.910 --> 00:33:17.490 and how we're going to move differently when 00:33:17.490 --> 00:33:21.009 it comes to raising our daughter here versus 00:33:21.009 --> 00:33:22.710 obviously raising our daughter in Toronto that 00:33:22.710 --> 00:33:24.630 she's around, like obviously family and friends. 00:33:25.839 --> 00:33:29.460 who you know look like her who understand obviously 00:33:29.460 --> 00:33:31.500 where she's from or her background so here it's 00:33:31.500 --> 00:33:34.599 going to be a completely different I would think 00:33:34.599 --> 00:33:38.880 a completely different upbringing but yeah that's 00:33:38.880 --> 00:33:40.759 hard to say we haven't yeah we haven't really 00:33:40.759 --> 00:33:42.759 dabbled too much into that yet so that's gonna 00:33:42.759 --> 00:33:44.480 have to we have to stay tuned in the podcast 00:33:44.480 --> 00:33:47.400 for that as she as she gets older because I'm 00:33:47.400 --> 00:33:49.839 not really sure How are we going to navigate 00:33:49.839 --> 00:33:51.359 that? Yeah, we haven't thought about that, but 00:33:51.359 --> 00:33:54.299 that's a good question. I'm excited to see her 00:33:54.299 --> 00:33:55.980 development and how it's going to be, especially 00:33:55.980 --> 00:33:57.680 because you guys are Caribbean, so it's kind 00:33:57.680 --> 00:33:59.640 of cool to watch from the outside. I can't wait 00:33:59.640 --> 00:34:01.839 to see it. Let me ask you another question. As 00:34:01.839 --> 00:34:05.509 far as this podcast goes. What what do you think 00:34:05.509 --> 00:34:08.409 some of the benefits or? What what would you 00:34:08.409 --> 00:34:11.289 see as a future plan for this podcast between 00:34:11.289 --> 00:34:14.110 us at that's not the point podcast What do you 00:34:14.110 --> 00:34:16.230 have visions for it? Did I give you enough time 00:34:16.230 --> 00:34:18.230 to think about visions for it? No, I don't know 00:34:18.230 --> 00:34:20.289 if you guys heard me I said this I'm doing this 00:34:20.289 --> 00:34:22.909 against my own will right so she's like hold 00:34:22.909 --> 00:34:24.929 me right now as we speak She's like, you know, 00:34:24.929 --> 00:34:27.449 just answer the question. It's like And I'm just 00:34:27.449 --> 00:34:29.670 like, okay trying to figure out what to say. 00:34:29.989 --> 00:34:35.619 No No, my vision is One, I think our story is 00:34:35.619 --> 00:34:39.039 different and unique that we are both two women 00:34:39.039 --> 00:34:41.679 coming from North America as expats living in 00:34:41.679 --> 00:34:44.719 Germany. We obviously came for love as well too, 00:34:44.719 --> 00:34:47.460 so that's also something that we connect upon 00:34:47.460 --> 00:34:50.500 as well. But I think what's super important to 00:34:50.500 --> 00:34:55.920 me with this podcast is just that anybody and 00:34:55.920 --> 00:34:58.460 everybody can take something. from our episodes 00:34:58.460 --> 00:35:02.059 and what we say, just giving advice, whether 00:35:02.059 --> 00:35:05.119 it's on love, whether it's on education, mental 00:35:05.119 --> 00:35:09.219 health. We wanna talk about many and multiple 00:35:09.219 --> 00:35:13.400 topics that can reach to anybody. And never forgetting, 00:35:13.599 --> 00:35:16.099 on a basis level, we're human, so we can all 00:35:16.099 --> 00:35:18.400 relate. We've all gone through something that... 00:35:18.380 --> 00:35:20.239 someone else has gone through or that their aunt 00:35:20.239 --> 00:35:22.079 went through or that their cousin went through. 00:35:22.659 --> 00:35:24.739 So we're just all here to kind of relate and 00:35:24.739 --> 00:35:26.800 share our stories. And we definitely at some 00:35:26.800 --> 00:35:30.039 point want to put it back to you guys and have 00:35:30.039 --> 00:35:32.400 you guys kind of give us your feedback or, you 00:35:32.400 --> 00:35:34.659 know, give us your experiences of what it's like 00:35:34.659 --> 00:35:36.960 living in Germany or if you're in Europe or in 00:35:36.960 --> 00:35:40.119 the States and just any other topics as well, 00:35:40.199 --> 00:35:41.699 too. We definitely want to get feedback as well. 00:35:41.739 --> 00:35:45.199 So that's how I that's how I envision. That's 00:35:45.199 --> 00:35:47.420 not the point. I love it. I love it. We're putting 00:35:47.420 --> 00:35:49.789 that on. vision board. It's gonna be great. Yes. 00:35:49.929 --> 00:35:51.130 Yes. We're gonna do that. We're gonna do that. 00:35:51.250 --> 00:35:53.429 It's gonna be amazing. I really I love having 00:35:53.429 --> 00:35:56.190 you on board. I think it's going to be great. 00:35:56.210 --> 00:35:58.909 Thank you. Moving forward. Uh I might not be 00:35:58.909 --> 00:36:00.969 here next week guys so just you know enjoy this 00:36:00.969 --> 00:36:02.929 episode right now. We'll see. She's still on 00:36:02.929 --> 00:36:05.199 the fence. She's still out. She's still on the 00:36:05.199 --> 00:36:07.820 fence somehow, I don't know, but she's been doing 00:36:07.820 --> 00:36:12.059 her research and I think she's like 90%. 90? 00:36:12.059 --> 00:36:15.400 98? That's not bad. That's not bad. She was telling 00:36:15.400 --> 00:36:18.579 me like 50 % yesterday. So we'll see how far 00:36:18.579 --> 00:36:21.659 that goes. But no, you're all aboard and I just 00:36:21.659 --> 00:36:23.559 want to see this journey for the both of us. 00:36:23.599 --> 00:36:26.280 I want to see how that goes. And I want to rep 00:36:26.280 --> 00:36:28.920 Hamburg too. I want to rep this country, this 00:36:28.920 --> 00:36:31.539 town, this city, because I do love being here. 00:36:31.760 --> 00:36:34.550 There's so many beautiful aspects. to living 00:36:34.550 --> 00:36:36.369 in Germany. I'm sure we've both been here. Well, 00:36:36.389 --> 00:36:38.010 I've been here five years now. How long have 00:36:38.010 --> 00:36:41.530 you been? I don't even remember. I don't. I have 00:36:41.530 --> 00:36:43.489 no recollection. She's been here for a minute. 00:36:43.650 --> 00:36:45.469 She's been here for a minute. A long minute. 00:36:45.750 --> 00:36:47.769 Yeah, a long minute. Yeah, for a long minute. 00:36:47.889 --> 00:36:51.610 I love this city and I want to represent her. 00:36:52.010 --> 00:36:53.869 Hopefully the best. Her. Yeah, Hamilton Her. 00:36:54.030 --> 00:36:58.159 Hamilton Her. She's a girl. Maybe we'll find 00:36:58.159 --> 00:37:02.159 another episode of why she's a girl. What's our 00:37:02.159 --> 00:37:04.579 guy's name again? Our intern? He is her. She 00:37:04.579 --> 00:37:13.280 is she. We thank you guys so much. Thank you 00:37:13.280 --> 00:37:16.179 guys for tuning in. For introducing Jay to the 00:37:16.179 --> 00:37:18.480 podcast. Appreciate it. We're so happy to have 00:37:18.480 --> 00:37:21.579 you. Welcome aboard. Thank you. I'm glad to be 00:37:21.579 --> 00:37:24.289 here. Natalie, that's not the point. family. 00:37:24.710 --> 00:37:27.610 Thank you. Thank you. I look forward to this 00:37:27.610 --> 00:37:30.210 journey, Gia. I know. Can we high five? Can you 00:37:30.210 --> 00:37:32.769 high five on the podcast? We did it. We did it. 00:37:32.769 --> 00:37:34.550 We're going to add slap later. Don't worry about 00:37:34.550 --> 00:37:36.710 it. Don't even worry about that part. It was 00:37:36.710 --> 00:37:38.429 good. We're going to add it. Yeah, definitely, 00:37:38.510 --> 00:37:41.190 guys. Please stay with us along our journey. 00:37:41.550 --> 00:37:43.789 Definitely tune in every week. We'll be dropping 00:37:43.789 --> 00:37:46.550 episodes every week. She's winking at me because 00:37:46.550 --> 00:37:50.369 I'm very, very bad. Yeah. Every week. Every week. 00:37:50.389 --> 00:37:53.489 Just stay tuned. And then if it's not, then... 00:37:53.070 --> 00:37:54.710 Send us an email. We're going to talk to the 00:37:54.710 --> 00:37:57.750 people and maybe we got a fire deal. But that's 00:37:57.750 --> 00:38:00.889 the point. So, see what I did there? Anyways, 00:38:01.409 --> 00:38:09.989 tune in every week, guys. Tune in every week. 00:38:10.170 --> 00:38:12.650 This girl's awful. Tune in every week, guys. 00:38:12.730 --> 00:38:15.030 We'll see you guys next week on another That's 00:38:15.030 --> 00:38:18.250 Not The Point episode. Thank you, guys.