1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:06,000 My New Year's Resolution is to wash the dishes. 2 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:10,000 The drink. 3 00:00:10,000 --> 00:00:15,000 Definitely, definitely, definitely give up the drink. 4 00:00:15,000 --> 00:00:21,000 So for New Year's this year, I'm going to give up drinking water because frankly I've had enough. 5 00:00:21,000 --> 00:00:25,000 My New Year's Resolution is to find my car. 6 00:00:25,000 --> 00:00:30,000 I parked it in the multi-storey car park about four months ago. 7 00:00:30,000 --> 00:00:34,000 And you know what, I can't remember my license plate, I don't remember the make or color. 8 00:00:34,000 --> 00:00:38,000 So I'm going to go to that multi-storey car park. 9 00:00:38,000 --> 00:00:42,000 And you know what, that'll probably be the only car there. 10 00:00:42,000 --> 00:00:46,000 My New Year's Resolution is 1080p. 11 00:00:46,000 --> 00:00:50,000 Why fuck a cap 3? 12 00:00:50,000 --> 00:00:55,000 I just want my boy back. 13 00:00:55,000 --> 00:01:18,000 Welcome. 14 00:01:18,000 --> 00:01:22,000 Back to Dunbracken. 15 00:01:22,000 --> 00:01:28,000 To help with accountability for all the townsfolk, we have asked everyone to send in their New Year's Resolutions for the coming year. 16 00:01:28,000 --> 00:01:34,000 That way we can all keep each other on track to be a little bit better than we were this year, than last. 17 00:01:34,000 --> 00:01:39,000 Welcome to Dunbracken, where the Town Slogan is still pending. 18 00:01:39,000 --> 00:01:46,000 If you would like to submit your slogan for the Town Slogan Contest, please enter it into the ballot box at Grundles Newsagents. 19 00:01:46,000 --> 00:01:55,000 If you already submitted your slogan and then were annoyed at it and burned down Grundles Newsagents in frustration, please come forward and implicate yourself in burning down Grundles Newsagents. 20 00:01:55,000 --> 00:02:01,000 Killing one and murdering countless Town Slogan ideas. 21 00:02:01,000 --> 00:02:11,000 Also our hearts and prayers go out to the Grundle family at this troubling time in their lives. 22 00:02:11,000 --> 00:02:12,000 Hey guys. 23 00:02:12,000 --> 00:02:13,000 What's up? 24 00:02:13,000 --> 00:02:14,000 How's it going? 25 00:02:14,000 --> 00:02:16,000 Yeah, you find out what we're doing yet? 26 00:02:16,000 --> 00:02:18,000 No, I'm still waiting on orders from Command. 27 00:02:18,000 --> 00:02:19,000 Cool. 28 00:02:19,000 --> 00:02:20,000 Quietly. 29 00:02:20,000 --> 00:02:21,000 Have a quiet month. 30 00:02:21,000 --> 00:02:22,000 Dumbraken has been quiet this month, yeah. 31 00:02:22,000 --> 00:02:25,000 It's pretty weird that we're stationed out of here to be honest. 32 00:02:25,000 --> 00:02:27,000 Well I think they maybe just forgot about us. 33 00:02:27,000 --> 00:02:29,000 Command would never forget about us. 34 00:02:29,000 --> 00:02:30,000 We're the SWAT team. 35 00:02:30,000 --> 00:02:32,000 They would never forget about us. 36 00:02:32,000 --> 00:02:35,000 But they sent us here into this little town and they never... 37 00:02:35,000 --> 00:02:37,000 It's been a while. 38 00:02:37,000 --> 00:02:38,000 It's been a while. 39 00:02:38,000 --> 00:02:39,000 So I'm just... 40 00:02:39,000 --> 00:02:42,000 I don't want to be a downer, guys, but what if they have forgotten about us? 41 00:02:42,000 --> 00:02:44,000 I mean, I knew this place is a hotspot. 42 00:02:44,000 --> 00:02:46,000 It's a hotspot for Crown. 43 00:02:46,000 --> 00:02:49,000 Yeah, but also it has been weirdly quiet too. 44 00:02:49,000 --> 00:02:51,000 Big cops for SWAT teams. 45 00:02:51,000 --> 00:02:53,000 We don't investigate. 46 00:02:53,000 --> 00:02:54,000 No, we just get the call. 47 00:02:54,000 --> 00:02:55,000 We go in. 48 00:02:55,000 --> 00:02:56,000 Yeah. 49 00:02:56,000 --> 00:02:59,000 So maybe we're just on one of them big stakeout type missions. 50 00:02:59,000 --> 00:03:01,000 We're waiting for the big call. 51 00:03:01,000 --> 00:03:02,000 Watching everything. 52 00:03:02,000 --> 00:03:05,000 And they're testing us by not giving us a brief. 53 00:03:05,000 --> 00:03:06,000 Yeah. 54 00:03:06,000 --> 00:03:10,000 They're putting the strain on our minds to see what we do. 55 00:03:10,000 --> 00:03:11,000 Interesting. 56 00:03:11,000 --> 00:03:13,000 I'm itching to repel, to be honest. 57 00:03:13,000 --> 00:03:14,000 Yeah. 58 00:03:14,000 --> 00:03:16,000 I'm looking up that big tall tree there and I'm just like... 59 00:03:16,000 --> 00:03:19,000 I might just go and just repel. 60 00:03:19,000 --> 00:03:20,000 I think you should. 61 00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:21,000 You gotta keep training, right? 62 00:03:21,000 --> 00:03:22,000 Well, yeah. 63 00:03:22,000 --> 00:03:24,000 I mean, I've been doing 15,000 pushups every day. 64 00:03:24,000 --> 00:03:25,000 Well, yeah, all of us can do that. 65 00:03:25,000 --> 00:03:26,000 I mean, we're all jacked as hell. 66 00:03:26,000 --> 00:03:27,000 Of course. 67 00:03:27,000 --> 00:03:28,000 We're all jacked as hell. 68 00:03:28,000 --> 00:03:29,000 Get your repels on, man. 69 00:03:29,000 --> 00:03:30,000 Get up that tree. 70 00:03:30,000 --> 00:03:31,000 Yeah. 71 00:03:31,000 --> 00:03:32,000 Get up that tree. 72 00:03:32,000 --> 00:03:33,000 Yeah. 73 00:03:33,000 --> 00:03:34,000 Yeah, that's great. 74 00:03:34,000 --> 00:03:35,000 Maybe you'll see something from up there. 75 00:03:35,000 --> 00:03:36,000 Who knows? 76 00:03:36,000 --> 00:03:37,000 Whoa. 77 00:03:37,000 --> 00:03:38,000 He actually went. 78 00:03:38,000 --> 00:03:41,000 God, he's so limber. 79 00:03:41,000 --> 00:03:44,000 He took so fast. 80 00:03:44,000 --> 00:03:45,000 He was so quick. 81 00:03:45,000 --> 00:03:48,000 Hey, I'm going to repel now. 82 00:03:48,000 --> 00:03:51,000 He's going to do it. 83 00:03:51,000 --> 00:03:52,000 Oh. 84 00:03:52,000 --> 00:03:53,000 Okay, I'm back. 85 00:03:53,000 --> 00:03:56,000 Oh, my tree actually, it wasn't that high. 86 00:03:56,000 --> 00:03:58,000 It's just that it's taller than us. 87 00:03:58,000 --> 00:03:59,000 It's just an oak. 88 00:03:59,000 --> 00:04:00,000 They're not that tall. 89 00:04:00,000 --> 00:04:06,000 Oh, for the new year, I would really like to get to know my cat better. 90 00:04:06,000 --> 00:04:09,000 I found out that he was a kitten, and you know what? 91 00:04:09,000 --> 00:04:11,000 I don't even know his name, would you believe it? 92 00:04:11,000 --> 00:04:13,000 Like, what does he do on the weekend? 93 00:04:13,000 --> 00:04:15,000 Does he have siblings? 94 00:04:15,000 --> 00:04:17,000 What kind of movies does he like? 95 00:04:17,000 --> 00:04:18,000 And you know what? 96 00:04:18,000 --> 00:04:19,000 I don't know where he lives. 97 00:04:19,000 --> 00:04:21,000 He seems to hang around around my place quite a lot. 98 00:04:21,000 --> 00:04:23,000 Yeah, I think that'd be good. 99 00:04:23,000 --> 00:04:29,000 My new year's resolution is to stop feeding the dogs. 100 00:04:29,000 --> 00:04:31,000 Just it's getting too much. 101 00:04:31,000 --> 00:04:34,000 It's 40 loaves a week now. 102 00:04:34,000 --> 00:04:36,000 It's cost a living crisis. 103 00:04:36,000 --> 00:04:37,000 I can't do it anymore. 104 00:04:37,000 --> 00:04:38,000 I can't do it. 105 00:04:38,000 --> 00:04:40,000 All right? 106 00:04:40,000 --> 00:04:44,000 I'm going to replace my mother's cactus. 107 00:04:44,000 --> 00:04:48,000 She'll never find it. 108 00:04:48,000 --> 00:04:57,000 Give me a sliced chicken software, half and half curry sauce, no peas, no onions, 109 00:04:57,000 --> 00:05:05,000 and a portion, what, two portions of chicken balls and a massive tub of curry. 110 00:05:05,000 --> 00:05:07,000 Hello? 111 00:05:07,000 --> 00:05:08,000 Good afternoon. 112 00:05:08,000 --> 00:05:11,000 I'm Phoning on behalf of Dunbracken Medical Practice. 113 00:05:11,000 --> 00:05:15,000 This is the number that we seem to have on file for Nathan. 114 00:05:15,000 --> 00:05:19,000 I was just trying to get in touch with him with regards to his STI test results. 115 00:05:19,000 --> 00:05:22,000 So if you could pass this message along and get him to get in touch with us, 116 00:05:22,000 --> 00:05:25,000 when it's convenient for him, that would be much appreciated. 117 00:05:25,000 --> 00:05:29,000 Thank you very much. 118 00:05:29,000 --> 00:05:32,000 My New Year's resolution. 119 00:05:32,000 --> 00:05:35,000 Probably to get out of this building. 120 00:05:35,000 --> 00:05:38,000 Help me, please. 121 00:05:38,000 --> 00:05:42,000 Hurry up, please. 122 00:05:42,000 --> 00:05:43,000 Hello. 123 00:05:43,000 --> 00:05:46,000 I've gathered the money you wanted. 124 00:05:46,000 --> 00:05:49,000 Well, I gathered some of the money you wanted. 125 00:05:49,000 --> 00:05:53,000 I'm not very liquid right now. 126 00:05:53,000 --> 00:05:59,000 I only have 187 pounds. 127 00:05:59,000 --> 00:06:03,000 I have 120 euros as well. 128 00:06:03,000 --> 00:06:07,000 I know you asked for 2,500. 129 00:06:07,000 --> 00:06:10,000 I don't have that kind of cash right now. 130 00:06:10,000 --> 00:06:13,000 It's all tied up. 131 00:06:13,000 --> 00:06:23,000 Give me my boy back. 132 00:06:23,000 --> 00:06:30,000 Who exactly is responsible for this attempt at taxidermy? 133 00:06:30,000 --> 00:06:32,000 Mummy, did you do it? 134 00:06:32,000 --> 00:06:35,000 Is the person who did it in trouble? 135 00:06:35,000 --> 00:06:36,000 Is mummy in trouble? 136 00:06:36,000 --> 00:06:38,000 I wouldn't say trouble, but... 137 00:06:38,000 --> 00:06:39,000 But? 138 00:06:39,000 --> 00:06:44,000 The corpse of a glorious beast has been made a mockery of. 139 00:06:44,000 --> 00:06:46,000 His face is all wrong. 140 00:06:46,000 --> 00:06:49,000 His ears are in the wrong place. 141 00:06:49,000 --> 00:06:53,000 And you've muddled up the thumbs and the big toes. 142 00:06:53,000 --> 00:06:55,000 I think it's beautiful. 143 00:06:55,000 --> 00:06:56,000 Thank you. 144 00:06:56,000 --> 00:06:58,000 And you know, their hands are like their feet, 145 00:06:58,000 --> 00:07:00,000 so they are really interchangeable. 146 00:07:00,000 --> 00:07:01,000 It looks all wrong. 147 00:07:01,000 --> 00:07:04,000 There's no such thing as wrong or right here. 148 00:07:04,000 --> 00:07:06,000 Me and Jasmine were scared of it, 149 00:07:06,000 --> 00:07:11,000 but then mummy started working on it and made it a lot more palatable for our young eyes. 150 00:07:11,000 --> 00:07:13,000 Now I'm not scared of gorillas. 151 00:07:13,000 --> 00:07:16,000 I'd go into the forest and spend days if I wanted to. 152 00:07:16,000 --> 00:07:26,000 The zoo paid you a handsome fee to bring Gerald the Gorilla back as close to life as possible 153 00:07:26,000 --> 00:07:30,000 because he was our most popular attraction and now... 154 00:07:30,000 --> 00:07:31,000 Very scary. 155 00:07:31,000 --> 00:07:32,000 Very scary. 156 00:07:32,000 --> 00:07:33,000 It's frightening. 157 00:07:33,000 --> 00:07:34,000 That was part of the charm. 158 00:07:34,000 --> 00:07:37,000 Come visit the terrifying gorilla. 159 00:07:37,000 --> 00:07:38,000 You've seen the leaflets. 160 00:07:38,000 --> 00:07:40,000 You've seen the adverts at the bus stop. 161 00:07:40,000 --> 00:07:47,000 Well, as far as I'm concerned, this is in fact as close to his original form as possible. 162 00:07:47,000 --> 00:07:49,000 Just because he's far away does not mean... 163 00:07:49,000 --> 00:07:51,000 He looks like he's doing a funny walk. 164 00:07:51,000 --> 00:07:54,000 Gerald the Gorilla made me cry, so mummy killed him. 165 00:07:54,000 --> 00:07:55,000 Excuse me? 166 00:07:55,000 --> 00:07:57,000 That's just between us, darling. 167 00:07:57,000 --> 00:07:58,000 Excuse me? 168 00:07:58,000 --> 00:07:59,000 That's alright. 169 00:07:59,000 --> 00:08:00,000 What? Explain. 170 00:08:00,000 --> 00:08:02,000 Children like to tell stories. 171 00:08:02,000 --> 00:08:03,000 We were in the zoo. 172 00:08:03,000 --> 00:08:04,000 Oh, go on. 173 00:08:04,000 --> 00:08:06,000 Sorry, am I not supposed to continue, mummy? 174 00:08:06,000 --> 00:08:07,000 Explain. 175 00:08:07,000 --> 00:08:08,000 Explain. 176 00:08:08,000 --> 00:08:09,000 We were in the zoo. 177 00:08:09,000 --> 00:08:10,000 We were in the zoo. 178 00:08:10,000 --> 00:08:11,000 Jasmine's ball fell in and... 179 00:08:11,000 --> 00:08:13,000 The gorilla ate it. 180 00:08:13,000 --> 00:08:16,000 It frightened us both so mummy took out a shotgun. 181 00:08:16,000 --> 00:08:18,000 Mummy always brings her shotgun to the zoo. 182 00:08:18,000 --> 00:08:20,000 Don't worry, it wasn't loaded. 183 00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:23,000 It was to intimidate the gorilla, but the gorilla didn't flinch. 184 00:08:23,000 --> 00:08:25,000 The gorilla went right at me. 185 00:08:25,000 --> 00:08:26,000 I had to fight back. 186 00:08:26,000 --> 00:08:27,000 It was self-defense. 187 00:08:27,000 --> 00:08:30,000 Mummy killed him with her bare hands. 188 00:08:30,000 --> 00:08:31,000 She's very strong. 189 00:08:31,000 --> 00:08:32,000 You're so muscular. 190 00:08:32,000 --> 00:08:36,000 And I attempted to reconstruct him, but some of the injuries were very severe. 191 00:08:36,000 --> 00:08:43,000 You killed this town's leading horse attractions' leading attraction, 192 00:08:43,000 --> 00:08:48,000 and you accepted money from the trust, put it back together, 193 00:08:48,000 --> 00:08:52,000 and made it look like some sort of circus freak. 194 00:08:52,000 --> 00:08:53,000 I love him. 195 00:08:53,000 --> 00:08:56,000 I take him to bed every night. 196 00:08:56,000 --> 00:08:57,000 He's very cuddly, no? 197 00:08:57,000 --> 00:08:59,000 Both me and Roger love him. 198 00:08:59,000 --> 00:09:01,000 Don't you want to see these children happy? 199 00:09:01,000 --> 00:09:06,000 No, I want to see the visitors who long to see Gerald. 200 00:09:06,000 --> 00:09:08,000 Mummy, this man is scary. 201 00:09:08,000 --> 00:09:09,000 No. 202 00:09:09,000 --> 00:09:10,000 No. 203 00:09:10,000 --> 00:09:12,000 I'm going to point my shotgun at you. 204 00:09:12,000 --> 00:09:14,000 Last time it wasn't loaded. 205 00:09:14,000 --> 00:09:15,000 And now? 206 00:09:15,000 --> 00:09:16,000 Well, you have two options. 207 00:09:16,000 --> 00:09:20,000 You can leave and never tell anyone about this, or you can find out. 208 00:09:20,000 --> 00:09:25,000 You saw also how the gorilla looked after the shotgun wasn't loaded, 209 00:09:25,000 --> 00:09:28,000 so I don't know if either of your options right now are very good, sir. 210 00:09:28,000 --> 00:09:31,000 The shotgun is typically the merciful one. 211 00:09:31,000 --> 00:09:32,000 Kill the scary man. 212 00:09:32,000 --> 00:09:33,000 I'm... 213 00:09:33,000 --> 00:09:34,000 Kill the scary man. 214 00:09:34,000 --> 00:09:35,000 Stop leaving now. 215 00:09:35,000 --> 00:09:38,000 I'm walking towards the door. 216 00:09:38,000 --> 00:09:40,000 We can sleep with every night. 217 00:09:40,000 --> 00:09:44,000 And when you're leaving, do a funny walk so the children are less frightened of you. 218 00:09:44,000 --> 00:09:46,000 Very well. 219 00:09:48,000 --> 00:09:49,000 That's not funny. 220 00:09:49,000 --> 00:09:51,000 That's not funny at all, Mummy. 221 00:09:51,000 --> 00:09:58,000 That's not funny at all. Darling, hold the shotgun. 222 00:10:01,000 --> 00:10:06,000 My New Year's resolution is probably to flee. 223 00:10:06,000 --> 00:10:17,000 I mean, I go on a holiday and I've had a sudden interest in cleaning products and strong bleach. 224 00:10:17,000 --> 00:10:22,000 And I think the other thing I really want to do... 225 00:10:22,000 --> 00:10:27,000 I think I just need to forgive myself, really. 226 00:10:27,000 --> 00:10:32,000 I think I need to forgive myself more this year and be nicer to myself. 227 00:10:32,000 --> 00:10:35,000 My New Year's resolution is to run a marathon. 228 00:10:35,000 --> 00:10:38,000 Every time I say that to my friends, they act all surprised and go, 229 00:10:38,000 --> 00:10:41,000 Really, Eric? I can't see you run a marathon. 230 00:10:41,000 --> 00:10:42,000 And I take great offense at that. 231 00:10:42,000 --> 00:10:44,000 I've run many smaller events before. 232 00:10:44,000 --> 00:10:49,000 I've run a charity bake sale, I've run a chess tournament, I've run a movie night, 233 00:10:49,000 --> 00:10:53,000 and I think I'm up to the logistical challenge of running a marathon. 234 00:10:55,000 --> 00:10:59,000 Oh yeah, my New Year's resolution may be... 235 00:10:59,000 --> 00:11:05,000 Hey, Mum, keep it down! I'm trying to record the New Year's resolution! 236 00:11:06,000 --> 00:11:09,000 What are you laughing for? 237 00:11:09,000 --> 00:11:13,000 Um, yeah, uh... 238 00:11:13,000 --> 00:11:16,000 I think being kind would be nice. 239 00:11:16,000 --> 00:11:19,000 Hey! Shut up, Ma! 240 00:11:19,000 --> 00:11:21,000 Jesus! 241 00:11:27,000 --> 00:11:30,000 I'm glad you've agreed to take the minutes. That was good of you. 242 00:11:30,000 --> 00:11:32,000 I mean... 243 00:11:32,000 --> 00:11:33,000 Someone has to do it. 244 00:11:33,000 --> 00:11:36,000 Yeah, and I won't draw attention to the elephant in the room here. 245 00:11:36,000 --> 00:11:38,000 You're the only one with... 246 00:11:38,000 --> 00:11:39,000 ...that can write. 247 00:11:39,000 --> 00:11:40,000 High school education? 248 00:11:40,000 --> 00:11:41,000 Yeah. 249 00:11:41,000 --> 00:11:43,000 I've got a good memory. We don't have to write it down. 250 00:11:43,000 --> 00:11:48,000 John's memory's great. That's how he knows that it was little Simon Smith that did the graffiti. 251 00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:51,000 John, what about when you're not in the Neighborhood Watch anymore? 252 00:11:51,000 --> 00:11:53,000 I'm not saying it's anytime soon. 253 00:11:53,000 --> 00:11:57,000 I mean, I would like to think that we all eventually leave the Neighborhood Watch. 254 00:11:57,000 --> 00:11:59,000 I would want, you know, other people to get involved. 255 00:11:59,000 --> 00:12:02,000 This isn't a lifelong dictatorship. 256 00:12:02,000 --> 00:12:06,000 That's the first minute. I notice you haven't written anything yet. 257 00:12:06,000 --> 00:12:09,000 I have a good memory. Is that what you said, John? 258 00:12:09,000 --> 00:12:11,000 No, you have good writing. That's... 259 00:12:11,000 --> 00:12:16,000 No, he said that about himself, and, you know, that clearly made you eligible for this. 260 00:12:16,000 --> 00:12:18,000 Well, we need someone with a good memory. 261 00:12:18,000 --> 00:12:19,000 I've got a good memory. 262 00:12:19,000 --> 00:12:24,000 We can't have seven people with ADHD running around the neighborhood again. 263 00:12:24,000 --> 00:12:32,000 Soon, soon we'll be watching ourselves forgetting to put on our jackets and trying to catch each other. 264 00:12:32,000 --> 00:12:36,000 We can't have another game of hide and seek going so wrong. 265 00:12:36,000 --> 00:12:40,000 Look, all I'm saying... Look, I'll write this down as I go. 266 00:12:40,000 --> 00:12:45,000 If the jackets weren't camouflaged, it would be harder to lose them. 267 00:12:45,000 --> 00:12:50,000 Look, part of the reason we like coming here is because, yeah, we'll have a little game. 268 00:12:50,000 --> 00:12:54,000 We'll have a little, you know, fix the neighborhood, and then we'll play a little. We'll have a little fun. 269 00:12:54,000 --> 00:12:56,000 I thought the game was fix the neighborhood. 270 00:12:56,000 --> 00:13:01,000 Well, that's part A. Then afterwards, if we've done a good job, we reward ourselves with hide and seek. 271 00:13:01,000 --> 00:13:03,000 Hence the camouflage jackets. 272 00:13:03,000 --> 00:13:08,000 Okay, well, I'm writing down that we're going to at some point maybe get our jackets from some new stockist. 273 00:13:08,000 --> 00:13:12,000 If you're writing this down, can you put it against the second minute which we're in now? 274 00:13:12,000 --> 00:13:14,000 Oh, I know. 275 00:13:14,000 --> 00:13:17,000 It's just I'm in charge of timekeeping, so... 276 00:13:17,000 --> 00:13:20,000 I've always remembered you as a good timekeeper. 277 00:13:20,000 --> 00:13:22,000 Thank you. That's very important to me. 278 00:13:22,000 --> 00:13:26,000 I've been using my grandfather's watch, and it's never steered me wrong. 279 00:13:26,000 --> 00:13:29,000 You have to bring him home. 280 00:13:29,000 --> 00:13:31,000 He doesn't trust me with it. 281 00:13:31,000 --> 00:13:32,000 It's fine. 282 00:13:32,000 --> 00:13:36,000 One day it will be mine. One day. Right, Granddad? 283 00:13:36,000 --> 00:13:38,000 Yeah. 284 00:13:38,000 --> 00:13:42,000 I made this another minute. It's a sub minute. Are you happy? 285 00:13:42,000 --> 00:13:46,000 A sub minute is actually a second in professional lingo. 286 00:13:46,000 --> 00:13:52,000 I did think if he was going to be here, he wasn't going to speak. Was that in last week's minutes, your Granddad? 287 00:13:52,000 --> 00:13:55,000 Well, John, do you remember that? Was it in last week's minutes? 288 00:13:55,000 --> 00:13:56,000 You are the historian. 289 00:13:56,000 --> 00:13:59,000 Well, I actually don't remember you writing anything down last week. 290 00:13:59,000 --> 00:14:00,000 Wow. 291 00:14:00,000 --> 00:14:03,000 Wow. You're holding this again. I had a bereavement. 292 00:14:03,000 --> 00:14:06,000 Oh, you mean the kid that you hit with your car? 293 00:14:06,000 --> 00:14:07,000 Yeah. 294 00:14:07,000 --> 00:14:09,000 That was still someone who was close to me that died. 295 00:14:09,000 --> 00:14:11,000 You really shouldn't have went to the funeral. 296 00:14:11,000 --> 00:14:14,000 I thought... I think it's going to look well in court. 297 00:14:14,000 --> 00:14:19,000 I just think you shouldn't have driven the same car to the funeral. Dint and all. 298 00:14:19,000 --> 00:14:23,000 And then offered to put the casket in your car and drive it? 299 00:14:23,000 --> 00:14:28,000 You said, oh, don't worry. I know usually a hearse is quite big because it takes a large coffin. 300 00:14:28,000 --> 00:14:33,000 But this is a child. How big can the coffin be? Come on, give me a second chance. 301 00:14:33,000 --> 00:14:34,000 Yeah. 302 00:14:34,000 --> 00:14:35,000 I remember this really well. 303 00:14:35,000 --> 00:14:37,000 I said those words. 304 00:14:37,000 --> 00:14:38,000 And to be fair, you were... 305 00:14:38,000 --> 00:14:41,000 Look, at least I have an estate car. It's a slightly bigger boot. 306 00:14:41,000 --> 00:14:44,000 And you were willing to do it free of service, which I think should be noted in the minutes. 307 00:14:44,000 --> 00:14:50,000 I will also say none of us were really welcome because we promised no more hit and runs. 308 00:14:50,000 --> 00:14:52,000 Is it a run if I return to the funeral? 309 00:14:52,000 --> 00:14:56,000 I mean, according to the grieving parents, it is, yes. 310 00:14:56,000 --> 00:15:01,000 I mean, yeah, Jake hit the car, but we all liked it pretty well. 311 00:15:01,000 --> 00:15:06,000 So I think the running aspect, we all have to look at ourselves and maybe do a little bit better. 312 00:15:06,000 --> 00:15:10,000 Your granddad really slowed us down. 313 00:15:10,000 --> 00:15:11,000 I mean... 314 00:15:11,000 --> 00:15:16,000 He did, but it's just because he was trying to help their child. 315 00:15:16,000 --> 00:15:19,000 He can run faster than any of us, but... 316 00:15:19,000 --> 00:15:21,000 This is why I think... 317 00:15:21,000 --> 00:15:24,000 I thought my car seat was a good hiding spot. 318 00:15:24,000 --> 00:15:27,000 You're allowed to run away when the seeker comes free. 319 00:15:27,000 --> 00:15:30,000 And you do have those tinted windows. 320 00:15:30,000 --> 00:15:34,000 I feel like getting the pacifier was a little much, trying to pretend you're a little baby. 321 00:15:34,000 --> 00:15:37,000 Hey, I had a bonnet and I didn't even put that on. 322 00:15:37,000 --> 00:15:38,000 Really? 323 00:15:38,000 --> 00:15:41,000 Yeah. That's good. Again, it's going to work well for me in court. 324 00:15:41,000 --> 00:15:45,000 Just to make clear, are you talking about like a hop bonnet or your car? 325 00:15:45,000 --> 00:15:47,000 Okay, I thought it was the car bonnet. 326 00:15:47,000 --> 00:15:50,000 No, that was missing already. 327 00:15:50,000 --> 00:15:51,000 Yeah. 328 00:15:51,000 --> 00:15:54,000 I reattached that for the funeral. 329 00:15:54,000 --> 00:15:57,000 Dent and all. I mean, they know what happened. 330 00:15:57,000 --> 00:16:00,000 I surrendered my dashcam to the police as well. 331 00:16:00,000 --> 00:16:01,000 Well, that's good of you. 332 00:16:01,000 --> 00:16:04,000 It's going to count well for me in court. 333 00:16:04,000 --> 00:16:07,000 How cooperative you were in that child's death. 334 00:16:07,000 --> 00:16:10,000 Yeah. Yeah. I helped dig that grave. 335 00:16:10,000 --> 00:16:12,000 They repeatedly asked you to stop. 336 00:16:12,000 --> 00:16:23,000 That's why they think it's premeditative. 337 00:16:23,000 --> 00:16:29,000 Hey, mom. Yeah. Yeah. She's she's in the bathroom. Yeah. 338 00:16:29,000 --> 00:16:32,000 I'm going to propose. Yeah. No, it's going to happen. 339 00:16:32,000 --> 00:16:38,000 I'm going to do it tonight. Yeah. I'm just like she's been in the bathroom for like 20 minutes. 340 00:16:38,000 --> 00:16:42,000 Probably just, you know, it's one of them nights. 341 00:16:42,000 --> 00:16:44,000 You know, it's been long. We've been out for ages. 342 00:16:44,000 --> 00:16:46,000 But yeah, when she gets back. 343 00:16:46,000 --> 00:16:50,000 Oh, yeah, I just I love her so much. 344 00:16:50,000 --> 00:16:54,000 I can't wait to marry this woman. 345 00:16:54,000 --> 00:16:58,000 I hope she comes back. 346 00:16:58,000 --> 00:17:01,000 I'm just sort of hoping to get this demon out of me. 347 00:17:01,000 --> 00:17:06,000 We have sort of become friends, but I think I would like to stop liking out 348 00:17:06,000 --> 00:17:10,000 and waking up all wet and church for sure. 349 00:17:10,000 --> 00:17:12,000 Here, come here to tell you this. 350 00:17:12,000 --> 00:17:16,000 My New Year's resolution this year is 1080p. 351 00:17:16,000 --> 00:17:18,000 Did you get it? Did you get it? 352 00:17:18,000 --> 00:17:22,000 That's pretty good. I don't think anyone else has done that. 353 00:17:22,000 --> 00:17:32,000 For this year, I'm just going to speak in auto tune. Yeah. 354 00:17:32,000 --> 00:17:40,000 Yeah. My New Year's resolution. 355 00:17:40,000 --> 00:17:44,000 Yeah. Um. 356 00:17:44,000 --> 00:17:50,000 I just want Crystal Palace to win. 357 00:17:50,000 --> 00:17:54,000 I'm just having such a bad season. 358 00:17:54,000 --> 00:18:03,000 I just I just need a win. 359 00:18:03,000 --> 00:18:04,000 That really did it for me. 360 00:18:04,000 --> 00:18:09,000 And I really feel like I would like to would you like to have a turn at repelling up the tree? 361 00:18:09,000 --> 00:18:12,000 Did you see anything while you're up there? Any mistakes? 362 00:18:12,000 --> 00:18:14,000 No. Maybe you'd pick a different tree then. 363 00:18:14,000 --> 00:18:18,000 Good idea. I mean, I could maybe try repelling up this building here instead. 364 00:18:18,000 --> 00:18:21,000 Oh, yeah, that could be a good idea. That makes sense. 365 00:18:21,000 --> 00:18:23,000 Yeah. OK. It is just a bungalow. 366 00:18:23,000 --> 00:18:25,000 Yeah, but there might still be something on the roof. 367 00:18:25,000 --> 00:18:27,000 You know what? You do it. You need a repel. 368 00:18:27,000 --> 00:18:29,000 I need a repel. I can't get the practice in. I want to get real stuck. 369 00:18:29,000 --> 00:18:35,000 Here I go. 370 00:18:35,000 --> 00:18:38,000 You got up there pretty quick. Yeah, that was fast. 371 00:18:38,000 --> 00:18:40,000 Hey guys, there's nothing up here. 372 00:18:40,000 --> 00:18:42,000 Ah, dang it. Repel down. 373 00:18:42,000 --> 00:18:47,000 I've got to repel down. 374 00:18:47,000 --> 00:18:50,000 Whoa. 375 00:18:50,000 --> 00:18:53,000 Hey, hey. Oh, I look really, really cool. 376 00:18:53,000 --> 00:18:56,000 That was really cool. Yeah, I really did it for me. 377 00:18:56,000 --> 00:18:57,000 Yeah, that was really good. 378 00:18:57,000 --> 00:19:00,000 I think I'm going to repel off that dog kennel. 379 00:19:00,000 --> 00:19:01,000 Oh, yeah. 380 00:19:01,000 --> 00:19:03,000 Dude, no one's ever repelled off something like that before. That's sick. 381 00:19:03,000 --> 00:19:05,000 Yeah, you got to keep it. You got to keep it. 382 00:19:05,000 --> 00:19:07,000 You got to repel. You got to keep it. You got to keep the repel. 383 00:19:07,000 --> 00:19:09,000 Yeah, all right. There could be intelligence inside that. 384 00:19:09,000 --> 00:19:11,000 Yeah, that's true. I could get a vantage point. 385 00:19:11,000 --> 00:19:13,000 You got to go inside and outside the dog kennel? 386 00:19:13,000 --> 00:19:15,000 Well, there's a window. I could repel through the window. 387 00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:18,000 I mean, it is really cool. Yeah. OK. 388 00:19:18,000 --> 00:19:21,000 That was sick as hell. OK, I'm going to climb up. 389 00:19:21,000 --> 00:19:23,000 Oh, he's quick. 390 00:19:23,000 --> 00:19:25,000 It was pretty small, though. I'm still right here. 391 00:19:25,000 --> 00:19:28,000 No, I'm still surprised. I can see your agility. 392 00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:29,000 That was a fast ascent. 393 00:19:29,000 --> 00:19:32,000 Well, in the theater of the mind, you made it up that skyscraper. 394 00:19:32,000 --> 00:19:34,000 And he's jacked us out. And he's so jacked. 395 00:19:34,000 --> 00:19:35,000 He's so jacked. 396 00:19:35,000 --> 00:19:38,000 OK, I'm going to jump through the window. 397 00:19:38,000 --> 00:19:40,000 Whoa. 398 00:19:40,000 --> 00:19:42,000 So... 399 00:19:42,000 --> 00:19:43,000 Although I did destroy it all. 400 00:19:43,000 --> 00:19:46,000 Yeah, but that was like smashing through doors. 401 00:19:46,000 --> 00:19:48,000 It's what we do. We're so possible. 402 00:19:48,000 --> 00:19:49,000 Yeah. Sick. 403 00:19:49,000 --> 00:19:50,000 Although I do feel bad for the dog, but... 404 00:19:50,000 --> 00:19:52,000 Nah, man, we've given the dog a lesson. 405 00:19:52,000 --> 00:19:53,000 True. Don't fuck with SWAT. 406 00:19:53,000 --> 00:19:55,000 Don't fuck with SWAT. That's it. 407 00:19:55,000 --> 00:19:57,000 Don't fuck with SWAT, man. 408 00:19:57,000 --> 00:20:00,000 And if there ain't no one in this town other than the dog knows it, 409 00:20:00,000 --> 00:20:01,000 then we've done our job. 410 00:20:01,000 --> 00:20:03,000 You're not feeling any repel number four? 411 00:20:03,000 --> 00:20:05,000 No, I haven't. I've been outside this city once. 412 00:20:05,000 --> 00:20:07,000 I mean, he is our breacher. 413 00:20:07,000 --> 00:20:09,000 He's usually patting the C4 on doors. 414 00:20:09,000 --> 00:20:10,000 Do you want to breach? 415 00:20:10,000 --> 00:20:11,000 You want to breach? Want to breach something? 416 00:20:11,000 --> 00:20:13,000 Oh, no, I haven't breached in... 417 00:20:13,000 --> 00:20:15,000 You've got to keep that practice up. You've got to breach. 418 00:20:15,000 --> 00:20:19,000 There's a giant, like, security compound there if you want to breach through that. 419 00:20:19,000 --> 00:20:20,000 Too big. 420 00:20:20,000 --> 00:20:21,000 I was even just thinking of the house next door. 421 00:20:21,000 --> 00:20:22,000 Hey, that's even better. 422 00:20:22,000 --> 00:20:26,000 I think I might go, like, even lower. I've got this smaller corner. 423 00:20:26,000 --> 00:20:28,000 Oh, damn. 424 00:20:28,000 --> 00:20:29,000 You're going to put the C4 on it? 425 00:20:29,000 --> 00:20:30,000 I'm going to ease myself back into it. 426 00:20:30,000 --> 00:20:31,000 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 427 00:20:31,000 --> 00:20:32,000 Yeah, start small. Start small. 428 00:20:32,000 --> 00:20:33,000 Put some C4 on there. 429 00:20:33,000 --> 00:20:36,000 It makes sense because the calcium is for good buns and muscles, 430 00:20:36,000 --> 00:20:37,000 and you're jacked as hell. 431 00:20:37,000 --> 00:20:38,000 You're so jacked. 432 00:20:38,000 --> 00:20:40,000 Jacked? Breach that mullet, kind of. 433 00:20:40,000 --> 00:20:42,000 I'm going to go breach this smaller corner. 434 00:20:42,000 --> 00:20:44,000 I've planted the C4, guys. 435 00:20:44,000 --> 00:20:46,000 Oh, man. Shit. 436 00:20:46,000 --> 00:20:47,000 That was so fast. 437 00:20:47,000 --> 00:20:48,000 Do we have to stand back or should we? 438 00:20:48,000 --> 00:20:49,000 That was so fast. 439 00:20:49,000 --> 00:20:50,000 My finger's twitching. My finger's twitching, man. 440 00:20:50,000 --> 00:20:52,000 Step back a bit. Yeah. 441 00:20:52,000 --> 00:20:54,000 Get ready to repel in case we need to. 442 00:20:54,000 --> 00:20:55,000 Yeah. 443 00:20:55,000 --> 00:20:56,000 Oh, man, I'm going to back up this tree. I hurt. 444 00:20:56,000 --> 00:20:58,000 Man, this is getting me so psyched. 445 00:20:58,000 --> 00:20:59,000 You're looking so jacked. 446 00:20:59,000 --> 00:21:00,000 Oh, you're all so jacked. 447 00:21:00,000 --> 00:21:01,000 Jacked as hell. 448 00:21:01,000 --> 00:21:02,000 Guys, we're all jacked. 449 00:21:02,000 --> 00:21:03,000 We're all jacked. 450 00:21:03,000 --> 00:21:04,000 We're all so jacked. 451 00:21:04,000 --> 00:21:05,000 We're all jacked. 452 00:21:05,000 --> 00:21:06,000 And let's watch this breach. 453 00:21:06,000 --> 00:21:11,000 Yeah, yeah. 454 00:21:11,000 --> 00:21:12,000 Don't fuck with Swat Boy. 455 00:21:12,000 --> 00:21:14,000 Don't fuck with the Swat Boy. 456 00:21:14,000 --> 00:21:15,000 Don't fuck with the Swat Boy. 457 00:21:15,000 --> 00:21:16,000 Don't fuck with the Swat Boy. 458 00:21:16,000 --> 00:21:19,000 I really wish I had got the yogurt part as well. 459 00:21:19,000 --> 00:21:20,000 It was just the corner. 460 00:21:20,000 --> 00:21:21,000 Hey, don't put yourself down. 461 00:21:21,000 --> 00:21:23,000 It's too small for you because you're jacked as hell. 462 00:21:23,000 --> 00:21:25,000 Yeah, we're all too jacked. 463 00:21:25,000 --> 00:21:27,000 Does anyone miss their family? 464 00:21:27,000 --> 00:21:28,000 No, man. 465 00:21:28,000 --> 00:21:29,000 I love you guys. 466 00:21:29,000 --> 00:21:30,000 Yeah, I love you guys, too. 467 00:21:30,000 --> 00:21:31,000 Yeah, I love you guys. 468 00:21:31,000 --> 00:21:32,000 You're all my family. 469 00:21:32,000 --> 00:21:33,000 Yeah. 470 00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:34,000 Swat for life. 471 00:21:34,000 --> 00:21:35,000 Swat for life. 472 00:21:35,000 --> 00:21:36,000 Swat for life. 473 00:21:36,000 --> 00:21:39,000 My New Year's resolution is to 474 00:21:39,000 --> 00:21:42,000 fix the dog kennel. 475 00:21:42,000 --> 00:21:44,000 I got home there just last week and, 476 00:21:44,000 --> 00:21:45,000 Jesus, I don't know. 477 00:21:45,000 --> 00:21:47,000 There must have been some vandals about 478 00:21:47,000 --> 00:21:49,000 flipping things just to write. 479 00:21:49,000 --> 00:21:53,000 I'll just get into the tool shop and I'll get fixing that up again. 480 00:21:53,000 --> 00:21:56,000 But Jesus, to be honest, I don't know if there'll be any saving it. 481 00:21:56,000 --> 00:21:57,000 It's 100. 482 00:21:57,000 --> 00:21:59,000 It's completely obliterated. 483 00:21:59,000 --> 00:22:00,000 It's weird. 484 00:22:00,000 --> 00:22:02,000 There was also a repel attached to the roof. 485 00:22:02,000 --> 00:22:04,000 And that was just sitting there. 486 00:22:04,000 --> 00:22:06,000 I don't know if that's anything to do with it. 487 00:22:06,000 --> 00:22:08,000 But I know that it's a repel. 488 00:22:08,000 --> 00:22:10,000 But I know that's what I'm going to do this year. 489 00:22:13,000 --> 00:22:14,000 Yeah. 490 00:22:14,000 --> 00:22:16,000 Probably should have learned how to fly that. 491 00:22:16,000 --> 00:22:20,000 I think I'll try doing that this year. 492 00:22:20,000 --> 00:22:22,000 Yeah. 493 00:22:22,000 --> 00:22:23,000 I think... 494 00:22:23,000 --> 00:22:24,000 Yeah. 495 00:22:29,000 --> 00:22:33,000 Back in 1957, 496 00:22:33,000 --> 00:22:37,000 we were commissioned to bury mines in a nearby field 497 00:22:37,000 --> 00:22:41,000 to prevent a potential German ground force invasion. 498 00:22:41,000 --> 00:22:43,000 Now I know what you're thinking. 499 00:22:43,000 --> 00:22:46,000 This is about 50 years after World War II. 500 00:22:46,000 --> 00:22:50,000 But we destroyed all our communications equipment 501 00:22:50,000 --> 00:22:54,000 to prevent any spies from communicating with the outside world. 502 00:22:54,000 --> 00:22:59,000 We did not know that World War II had ended until 1962. 503 00:22:59,000 --> 00:23:04,000 And we didn't even know that the Germans had lost until 1967, 504 00:23:04,000 --> 00:23:09,000 as it was a German tourist that informed us of the end of World War II. 505 00:23:09,000 --> 00:23:12,000 And we had just assumed the worst. 506 00:23:12,000 --> 00:23:18,000 Now, I made my money with contracts to decommission these land mines. 507 00:23:18,000 --> 00:23:24,000 And for the new year, I feel like I should really follow through on my promise. 508 00:23:24,000 --> 00:23:28,000 Or at the very least, fix the fence surrounding the offending area. 509 00:23:28,000 --> 00:23:34,000 Back to Dunbracken is created, produced and edited by Conleth McVeigh. 510 00:23:34,000 --> 00:23:38,000 For more information on the podcast, including the weekly town newsletter, 511 00:23:38,000 --> 00:23:41,000 you can follow us at DunbrackenPod on Instagram. 512 00:23:41,000 --> 00:23:48,000 This episode featured Patrick Meyer, Laura Conlon, Ciaran Sands, Owen Fox, 513 00:23:48,000 --> 00:23:53,000 Eddie Goodwin, Gerard Donnelly, Gemma Burnett and Robert Vaughan. 514 00:23:53,000 --> 00:23:59,000 The opening and closing music was created by Connor Mallon, 515 00:23:59,000 --> 00:24:03,000 and you can check out his entire album Unearthed on Spotify now. 516 00:24:03,000 --> 00:24:24,000 Thank you for listening. We look forward to welcoming you back to Dunbracken very soon. 517 00:24:33,000 --> 00:24:39,000 His wife and his only memory of him is her. 518 00:24:39,000 --> 00:24:45,000 Why won't you give me my boy, my... 519 00:24:45,000 --> 00:24:51,000 I've been a good man all my life. I've been kind. 520 00:24:51,000 --> 00:24:57,000 I didn't have sex before marriage. Much. 521 00:24:57,000 --> 00:25:06,000 I looked after my boy as best as I could, but sometimes you just get distracted. 522 00:25:06,000 --> 00:25:12,000 Sometimes you forget about that, which is the best thing that ever happened to you. 523 00:25:12,000 --> 00:25:19,000 Bring him back, you bastard. I'll find you. I'll take you on. 524 00:25:19,000 --> 00:25:25,000 They say a mother can hold ten cars for her child. 525 00:25:25,000 --> 00:25:32,000 If they can hold that, what can I hold? 526 00:25:32,000 --> 00:25:59,000 I'm coming for you.