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Can't put that in there.

2
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Can someone else put it in for me?

3
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No, no, no, no, no, no.

4
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You see, that's the wrong bin.

5
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You're putting, you're putting plastic waste, plastic waste, plastic waste.

6
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Okay.

7
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And the thing you're trying to throw in there is a ceramic toilet.

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I thought it was plastic.

9
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No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

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That's clearly ceramic.

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It's white.

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Yes.

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Yes, I know.

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It looks plastic-y.

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Yes.

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It's white and it's dishwasher proof.

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Is that why you're getting rid of it?

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Did you try and put it in the dishwasher?

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It's why I bought it.

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No, it's not why I'm throwing it away.

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No, well, it's cracked.

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Oh, it is cracked.

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Yes, clearly.

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It clearly looks like, if it looks like-

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I suppose plastic doesn't crack.

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Maybe you have a point.

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Yeah, yeah, it's cracked.

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It's got bits missing as well.

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I mean, it just, it's no good as a toilet now anymore.

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I mean, but we do have the ceramics area.

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Oh no, it still works.

32
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I just got a new one for Christmas.

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I'll take it.

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Yeah, all right.

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I was about to throw away this dishwasher, but you're saying this is dishwasher proof?

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And microwave proof.

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So this makes it a little bit less dinn bay.

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Welcome, back to Dunbracken.

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Guys, thanks very much for coming in. I know temperatures are high, there's a lot of pressure,

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we're heading towards month end and we haven't all hit our targets. Like we were expecting

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the projections were maybe a wee bit overblown, but I didn't come up with them. I know you

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is there stress and there's various ways to relieve the stress. There's not a policy

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in place as such, but I personally feel is that there's too much slime in the office.

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Well, what are we meant to do? You took away our harbours.

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Look, I didn't have a problem when them and upstairs came for your fidget spinners. I

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said they were fine. Then you all got fed up with fidget spinners. Now yous are on the

47
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slime. Yeah. But you're making slime in the office as well.

48
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Yeah, it's cheaper. Yeah. Well, here's the idea. Bring your slime

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from home. If you're going to make homemade slime, bring it from home. Homemade, not office

50
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made slime. I find it's the moisture of the office that really gets the slime too slimy.

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My home is too warm. And if I make it from home at home, my kids

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will play with it. My kids eat it all mostly. Oh, that's not good.

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Oh no, mine's is safe for ingestion. Really? You're going to share that recipe?

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I took the lead out of mine. Is that why it's not as sticky?

55
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That's why it's not as sticky. See, that's the other issue. Dan ate some

56
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of the slime because you've been keeping it in the fridge to try and cool it down. Oh

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God, his are mine. Was it my slime? There was no label on it. That's the issue.

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Well, it wasn't mine then. I label all my slime. I label mine too.

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He thought it was jam or something. So I guess it was sticky.

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I can see that. Is it you?

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Well it is sticky, but you wouldn't mistake it for jam and it's labeled.

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Derek does put seeds in his. He's been trying to like get it more grippy.

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Can I also say, I feel like Dan eats people's lunches.

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Yeah. If we're going to, or is this to raise complaint?

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I just, I feel like he was probably trying to eat someone's lunch and he saw a plastic

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container and he, you know what? It probably, it would probably haunt my name on it.

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Granted, like that's an issue, but it is a separate issue.

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It's contributed towards the stress. It's a little stressful.

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I can't really talk to him right now because he's in hospital and in a juice coma. So I'll

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deal with him if he comes back, when he comes back, I should say.

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Oh no, are we going to have to take over his work now?

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He has been slacking. Oh, that's stressful. I'm going to just, I'm

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just going to need this slime. Stop manipulating your slime on the desk.

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I just need that. Please tell me we're getting an attempt work.

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Look how gloopy his is and mine's is just like, there's no consistency to it. I just,

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I can't need it like that. Yeah, well you know what? There's no consistency

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too. Your sales, they're in the toilet with other sorts of slime.

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That's probably cause Dan's been in a coma. Oh, don't tell me we've been flushing the

79
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slime. It doesn't flush. No, that's the other issue. That's backed

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up as well. So this place has fallen apart because of slime.

81
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But it feels more fun. And I feel like the slime is the symptom,

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not the cause. I feel happy to come to work these days.

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Get out of the warm house, get into the slime pit.

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You get to avoid your kids so they don't play with your slime.

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Oh no, I love my kids. I just don't want them touching my slime.

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His is very lead based. Yeah, you should keep that away. And that

87
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is also a risk here as well. I know we have two members of staff here who are allergic

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to oranges. I think we're all allergic to lead. All right.

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So get rid of the slime. You're not meant to eat it.

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No one's meant to eat the slime. Someone did and the fucking constant hospital.

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All right. I'm just saying that was self-inflicted.

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Yeah. He keeps eating people's. Maybe this was actually a tactic. Maybe someone got really

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annoyed that Dan was eating their lunch. So they put some, I guess, yeah, poison into

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their lunch and then they know who the culprit is. Now they know it's Dan.

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That's quite possible. We're jumping straight to my lead for slime.

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Shall we just get the police involved now? I was saying this is some sort of murder attempt.

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No, I don't think we have to get that far. And Dan was only stealing lunches. I feel

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like it's unfair to make him a criminal. He is a thief.

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So you would prosecute Dan who's in hospital for mistakenly eating your lead based slime.

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It wasn't a mistake. And he's been doing this for months and it's not just me.

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It's intentional slime eating. I think, again, my, I think you thought it

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was a regular lunch. Yeah. Yours was orange. I think that day you

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were trying a new thing. So yeah, it could have been marmalade.

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I do apologize for that. It shouldn't have been orange. I know people are allergic to

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the orange. Exactly. That's very confusing.

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Dan isn't one of them. So yeah, well, soon we'll be allergic to very little. Be allergic

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to life because he's not well. Welcome to number four on Bracken Ark Mute.

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And this is one of the last three remaining homes available in this exclusive development

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of seven homes. As you may know, this was the former cemetery, at least part of it,

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but it's been transformed as you can see into a delightful park village with wonderful,

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wonderful landscaped gardens and artificial grass. So very low maintenance. But as you

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can see here, well, the homes are all available with a variety of bespoke turnkey options.

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Does the shed come with the house? The shed? This is actually a really wonderful feature

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of these homes because normally starter homes would not have dedicated storage facilities.

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Does it have a basement? Actually, no. These properties do not have

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basements. I'm afraid. Wouldn't there be basements?

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Can you tell me the square footage of the shed? Square footage of the shed? Well, it's

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about eight feet by five feet. What's the area of it? You know, what's the space?

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Well, whenever we get out to the back garden, you can go and have a little look and see.

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Can we start with the shed? Let me go to the shed.

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Well, before we do that, because what I would be concerned about is that, you know, if your

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feet might get a little bit muddy and rather that we maybe do the inside of the property

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first. So listen, why don't we start here in the spacious drawing room?

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If there's no basement, is there a cellar? Well, basements and cellars, it's pretty much

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the same thing. But no, there is no basement. I'm just looking for some place that's around

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six feet under. This is, well, no, I'm sorry, but in this particular

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property, no, that this is the ground floor and there is no space below this floor at

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all. Can you dig out the garden?

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Well, relevant to subject planning approvals, I suppose you could. I mean, are you thinking

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of a swimming pool or something like that? I mean, it's not...

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Well, I just thought if there doesn't come with a cellar, maybe we could put on our own,

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put a shed above it. Thinking outside the box. Good, good.

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This is the thing, these homes are designed to be wonderfully flexible.

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And are the graves still about? Well, that's something I'm not allowed to

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talk about, but... What about the bones?

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Again, that's something I'm not allowed to talk about.

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That sounds like a yes. No, no, absolutely. It's categorically not a yes.

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You could have used the graves for the foundation for the shed, I think, you know, repurposing.

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That would have been a really smart move. Listen, I'm just marketing the property. I

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didn't actually build the properties, so I couldn't really comment on that aspect.

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Did anyone buried here think that they took wealth with them into the afterlife?

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Well, I really couldn't say. I mean, listen, I'd like to just draw your attention to this

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beautiful engineered hardwood flooring and the slate fireplace. And I mean, as you can

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see, then these walls are finished in magnolia, but they are available in a...

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But I feel like we should move on from the drawing room now, I think, if you've listened

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to all three of us. None of us have expressed much interest in the drawing room.

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Let's move down the passageway. And as I said, the ghost storage cupboard there is

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on your left beside the downstairs toilet. Here we have then, before we enter the kitchen,

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a very fully fitted utility room with laundry and space for a washer dryer.

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I love the kitchen island.

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It's great.

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I'm a big fan of the island.

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Good height. Good height.

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Well, I mean, is there anything internally in the property here? Does it meet your needs,

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do you think?

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I like that there's space for a washing machine and a tumble dryer. I've never had that before.

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That's class.

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Oh yes, I mean, these homes are designed for modern living.

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Three bedrooms, pretty good at this price range, I'll be honest.

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No bidet though.

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No bidet. Well, the thing is, I mean, is that there wasn't very much a fashion for bidets

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back in the, in what, around the seventies and eighties and so on, but I find that people

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didn't really use them.

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You could bring your bidet from your rental property, Bert. Could you not?

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No, it's strapped down.

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00:09:31,800 --> 00:09:36,520
So you're saying they're planning permission anyway for a basement?

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No, no, no, no, no, no, absolutely not.

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They'd put a bidet in the basement.

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Planning permission for a cellar, I think you said.

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No, no, no, no. What I said was, and it's very important, what I said is that it is

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subject to planning permission, which you would have to apply for yourself. That would

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be nothing to do with Dunbracken Homes.

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And what's the ground like? Is it like granite or is it nice smooth clay that could easily

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be tunneled?

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00:09:57,080 --> 00:10:01,040
I'm really not sure if I'm honest. I mean, you know, you could go out there and lift

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up a corner of the artificial grass and have a little look underneath. I don't know much

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about soil myself.

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Oh, have a look for bones while you're at it.

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Oh yeah.

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No, no, no. I would say no, absolutely not.

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Three bathrooms, yeah.

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Yes, yes, that's right.

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00:10:12,240 --> 00:10:15,240
But no bidet, that's unusual that three bathrooms, no bidet.

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It's a surprise for me personally.

185
00:10:16,240 --> 00:10:19,240
Actually, a lot of homes don't have bidets these days.

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You could have a bidet in a shed maybe.

187
00:10:21,240 --> 00:10:22,240
Oh, that'd be nice.

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With a plumbing, yeah.

189
00:10:23,240 --> 00:10:28,240
Again, the home is yours to do with as you wish. Should you make a purchase?

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00:10:28,240 --> 00:10:32,240
I mean, I'd prefer if there was bidets instead of actual toilets.

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It's a one stop shop.

192
00:10:33,240 --> 00:10:37,240
Would you like me to draw up a contract? Are you interested in purchasing the property?

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00:10:37,240 --> 00:10:41,240
Aye, if you can make sure I may pull out a permission for a basement.

194
00:10:41,240 --> 00:10:44,240
But I'm afraid no, that wouldn't be our thing. That would be something you'd have to organize by yourself.

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00:10:44,240 --> 00:10:48,240
Rather than a contract, maybe just draw up what it would look like with a bidet in it.

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Okay, pass.

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Maybe in the drawing room?

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I can't have a contract until I've seen a shed.

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Pass the crayons.

200
00:10:58,240 --> 00:11:04,240
Okay, okay. How about this? How about this? I reduce it on a slime and I keep it just in my desk drawer.

201
00:11:04,240 --> 00:11:08,240
And we will put it around a card wishing Dan a speedy recovery.

202
00:11:08,240 --> 00:11:11,240
Don't put any slime in the card. You know him, he'll eat it.

203
00:11:11,240 --> 00:11:12,240
He's in a coma.

204
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Might wake up and eat more slime.

205
00:11:14,240 --> 00:11:15,240
I mean...

206
00:11:15,240 --> 00:11:17,240
To be fair, I've caught him eating all sorts of things, alright?

207
00:11:17,240 --> 00:11:18,240
But this is...

208
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Hold on, what does that mean?

209
00:11:19,240 --> 00:11:21,240
Get your mind out of the gutter.

210
00:11:21,240 --> 00:11:25,240
No, I didn't think it was sexual. I just thought you were getting him to eat things.

211
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That was ban two. First we had the hammers, then we had Dan eating things.

212
00:11:29,240 --> 00:11:31,240
That's why we had to ban his fidget spinners.

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00:11:31,240 --> 00:11:35,240
Yeah, and he ate all them as well. I don't know how that didn't land him in the hospital.

214
00:11:35,240 --> 00:11:38,240
But on occasion he did beg me to feed him things.

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00:11:38,240 --> 00:11:41,240
And that is again, I shouldn't even really be talking about it.

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00:11:41,240 --> 00:11:45,240
That's a whole separate personal issue, but he probably won't survive anyway so I may as well tell you.

217
00:11:45,240 --> 00:11:47,240
But he's in the hospital. No more slime.

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Don't put slime in the card. Keep slime in your drawer.

219
00:11:50,240 --> 00:11:54,240
You, I don't know, you're making viscous slime and that could slide everywhere.

220
00:11:54,240 --> 00:11:59,240
Yeah, it might not even be slime at this point. Maybe I am allowed to bring my stuff still.

221
00:11:59,240 --> 00:12:02,240
Well yours could potentially just be fluid at this point.

222
00:12:02,240 --> 00:12:06,240
Mine's is just a liquid, a viscous liquid. It's got nose consistency.

223
00:12:06,240 --> 00:12:08,240
As long as it's an inert liquid, keep it in your drawer.

224
00:12:08,240 --> 00:12:10,240
Okay, I can deal with that.

225
00:12:10,240 --> 00:12:13,240
Alright. I mean, did Dan at least have health insurance?

226
00:12:13,240 --> 00:12:14,240
No.

227
00:12:14,240 --> 00:12:16,240
I just thought given that we sell it, he might have it.

228
00:12:16,240 --> 00:12:18,240
We can't be dealing with that.

229
00:12:18,240 --> 00:12:23,240
Could we go to his wife, get health insurance for him?

230
00:12:23,240 --> 00:12:27,240
That's a seal. That's a seal though, so that bumps us up a little bit.

231
00:12:27,240 --> 00:12:30,240
No, I can't. I call him as a pre-existing condition.

232
00:12:30,240 --> 00:12:31,240
That's why he's ahead of you.

233
00:12:31,240 --> 00:12:32,240
Not by much.

234
00:12:32,240 --> 00:12:33,240
No.

235
00:12:33,240 --> 00:12:36,240
I'm going to go to his wife and see if she has health insurance.

236
00:12:36,240 --> 00:12:38,240
Leave your slime in the drawer when you go and see her.

237
00:12:38,240 --> 00:12:42,240
It's a good selling point. This is non-lead based.

238
00:12:42,240 --> 00:12:46,240
This couldn't, I'm not the person who killed your husband. I'll be welcomed into the home.

239
00:12:46,240 --> 00:12:47,240
He's not dead yet.

240
00:12:47,240 --> 00:12:50,240
Not dead yet. And he did it to himself.

241
00:12:50,240 --> 00:12:53,240
You know what? I don't mess him.

242
00:12:53,240 --> 00:12:56,240
He was a thief and he died like one.

243
00:12:56,240 --> 00:12:59,240
In a coma, like all thieves.

244
00:12:59,240 --> 00:13:01,240
Why did they have to induce a coma?

245
00:13:01,240 --> 00:13:03,240
He became very violent.

246
00:13:03,240 --> 00:13:05,240
Towards the doctors?

247
00:13:05,240 --> 00:13:09,240
Anything. He's put three other people in a coma, uninduced.

248
00:13:09,240 --> 00:13:11,240
Is that why we're so empty today?

249
00:13:11,240 --> 00:13:13,240
It was a right struggle.

250
00:13:13,240 --> 00:13:14,240
That makes sense.

251
00:13:14,240 --> 00:13:19,240
This might not be the right time to say it, but a lot of my policies, we're going to have to pay them out.

252
00:13:19,240 --> 00:13:21,240
You were selling to people in the office?

253
00:13:21,240 --> 00:13:26,240
I was just going to fault their false claims because I had a lot of claims for coma victims, but that might be that.

254
00:13:26,240 --> 00:13:30,240
Coma victims. Is that something that we cover? I'm not sure it is.

255
00:13:30,240 --> 00:13:36,240
It is apparently. It's in the upsell because it's happened so rarely.

256
00:13:36,240 --> 00:13:38,240
We're ruined.

257
00:13:38,240 --> 00:13:41,240
This is like when I sold that plague insurance.

258
00:13:41,240 --> 00:13:44,240
Yeah, really. But yeah, we struggled.

259
00:13:44,240 --> 00:13:46,240
We were making a lot of money off it for a long time.

260
00:13:46,240 --> 00:13:47,240
For a long time.

261
00:13:47,240 --> 00:13:51,240
No, there was no loom bands that week, that's for sure.

262
00:13:57,240 --> 00:14:00,240
Do you think that ship's getting closer?

263
00:14:00,240 --> 00:14:03,240
Seems to be. It's gradually getting bigger.

264
00:14:03,240 --> 00:14:07,240
I just think we might need to switch the light on a little bit brighter this time.

265
00:14:07,240 --> 00:14:09,240
It's just a little bit too dim.

266
00:14:09,240 --> 00:14:12,240
At the minute we've got it on the lowest level because it's a bit blinding when you're up here.

267
00:14:12,240 --> 00:14:14,240
Yes indeed, Gerry.

268
00:14:14,240 --> 00:14:17,240
What does it mean when we go brighter? I don't think I've read that.

269
00:14:17,240 --> 00:14:21,240
I don't see the dimmer switch. That was the first thing I was introduced when I started in the lighthouse.

270
00:14:21,240 --> 00:14:23,240
They told me there's a dimmer switch here. You can play around.

271
00:14:23,240 --> 00:14:29,240
No, they don't like to advertise that because usually a lighthouse is meant to be just big bright lights.

272
00:14:29,240 --> 00:14:33,240
It was the first thing I was told. I was told that we were using too much energy.

273
00:14:33,240 --> 00:14:35,240
We have to dim it every now and then when there's no ships coming.

274
00:14:35,240 --> 00:14:40,240
They didn't tell me that yet. We did 101 history of bulbs.

275
00:14:40,240 --> 00:14:43,240
I don't think I did that. It's a bit more modern now. It's a bit more modern days.

276
00:14:43,240 --> 00:14:48,240
These bulbs are like xenon bulbs. They're really, really, really powerful.

277
00:14:48,240 --> 00:14:51,240
But they are a dimmer bulb. The olden days they weren't.

278
00:14:51,240 --> 00:14:56,240
I believe you. I just don't know about it. You've seniority over me.

279
00:14:56,240 --> 00:15:02,240
Maybe you make that call. I'll note it down in the book. I've a nice handwriting.

280
00:15:02,240 --> 00:15:06,240
I didn't understand. You can read your messages really, really clearly.

281
00:15:06,240 --> 00:15:08,240
Thank you.

282
00:15:08,240 --> 00:15:14,240
I think that ship, usually it's whenever the ship gets within, it's about this big, about the size of a cantaloupe.

283
00:15:14,240 --> 00:15:17,240
That's the size. That's when we start. We have to turn it right up.

284
00:15:17,240 --> 00:15:26,240
I like that picture in the book though. The ones that are sort of like when a woman's having a baby and it shows each week what size the baby is.

285
00:15:26,240 --> 00:15:29,240
I like the one about ships getting closer.

286
00:15:29,240 --> 00:15:33,240
Ships getting closer. It's about six weeks. That's usually the size of a cantaloupe, I think.

287
00:15:33,240 --> 00:15:38,240
That's nice. People think this game's all boring, this job, but it's actually lots to learn.

288
00:15:38,240 --> 00:15:39,240
Lots to learn.

289
00:15:39,240 --> 00:15:40,240
I didn't know about the dimmer at all.

290
00:15:40,240 --> 00:15:45,240
I know. It was only installed whenever out of the week before I came in. Did you not see the workmen?

291
00:15:45,240 --> 00:15:46,240
The workmen?

292
00:15:46,240 --> 00:15:49,240
You've been here all this time. Did you not see them coming in? They installed it.

293
00:15:49,240 --> 00:15:55,240
It's only been you and me. I thought nobody was allowed in, nobody was allowed out. I did my classes on Zoom.

294
00:15:55,240 --> 00:15:59,240
Classes on Zoom. Ooh, that's very, very, very modern. The WiFi's usually really patchy around here.

295
00:15:59,240 --> 00:16:07,240
It worked for me most of the time. Yeah, well, we didn't get the dimming bit right, but Jerry, I don't think that looks like a cantaloupe.

296
00:16:07,240 --> 00:16:08,240
That's more like a...

297
00:16:08,240 --> 00:16:10,240
It's more like a 42 week.

298
00:16:10,240 --> 00:16:17,240
Oh, God. Oh, God. Hang on. Let me turn up the dimmer. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Oh, it's a bit stuck. Oh, what do we do?

299
00:16:17,240 --> 00:16:18,240
You're asking me?

300
00:16:18,240 --> 00:16:19,240
I don't know.

301
00:16:19,240 --> 00:16:21,240
Maybe we could grease it up or something.

302
00:16:21,240 --> 00:16:22,240
What have we got?

303
00:16:22,240 --> 00:16:23,240
I've got some jam.

304
00:16:23,240 --> 00:16:27,240
Jam? Oh, yeah. Jam. Or what about marmalade, maybe?

305
00:16:27,240 --> 00:16:29,240
It's a bit sticky. It's got bits in it.

306
00:16:29,240 --> 00:16:32,240
Oh, yeah. I know. You don't like the smooth.

307
00:16:32,240 --> 00:16:38,240
I do like the smooth. I like both, though, but the marmalade, you see, it's weird when you like both of them, really, isn't it?

308
00:16:38,240 --> 00:16:41,240
Usually you have a preference one to the other, but I like both of them.

309
00:16:41,240 --> 00:16:47,240
You like both? Well, you have to get something because this doesn't work. I mean, at the minute, the bulb was only at like 30%, you know, the ships.

310
00:16:47,240 --> 00:16:48,240
Water? There's water?

311
00:16:48,240 --> 00:16:49,240
Water.

312
00:16:49,240 --> 00:16:50,240
Will that make it slippy?

313
00:16:50,240 --> 00:16:52,240
Well, there's loads of water. Yeah, yeah. We could open a window.

314
00:16:52,240 --> 00:16:54,240
We could do that.

315
00:16:54,240 --> 00:16:58,240
Hang on. Oh, maybe we're OK. The ships disappear. Where has it gone?

316
00:16:58,240 --> 00:17:00,240
Oh, it's gone. Must have found its way somewhere.

317
00:17:00,240 --> 00:17:02,240
Yeah, yeah, they always do.

318
00:17:04,240 --> 00:17:08,240
Oh, hang on, hang on, hang on. Sorry. No, that was the wrong switch. Sorry. That was my fault.

319
00:17:16,240 --> 00:17:21,240
I cannot believe you have this much paraffin. This is wonderful.

320
00:17:21,240 --> 00:17:24,240
I thought I was going to be surrounded by darkness.

321
00:17:24,240 --> 00:17:27,240
Good thing you came over before the storm really took hold.

322
00:17:27,240 --> 00:17:31,240
Yeah, and I was just going to ask you for a cup for my tea. But here we are.

323
00:17:31,240 --> 00:17:34,240
No, no, no, no, no, no. Can't see you outside.

324
00:17:34,240 --> 00:17:38,240
No, no, no, I'm definitely not leaving. I think I heard a piece of your riffle then.

325
00:17:38,240 --> 00:17:40,240
Wouldn't want to be out there when it comes down in your head.

326
00:17:40,240 --> 00:17:43,240
No, I wouldn't. Did you allow Davey? Is he still up there?

327
00:17:43,240 --> 00:17:45,240
Davey, there's no talking to him.

328
00:17:45,240 --> 00:17:47,240
Davey?

329
00:17:47,240 --> 00:17:48,240
What?

330
00:17:48,240 --> 00:17:49,240
Davey, are you coming down?

331
00:17:49,240 --> 00:17:51,240
Are you still on the guest?

332
00:17:51,240 --> 00:17:52,240
Oh, yes.

333
00:17:52,240 --> 00:17:53,240
No, I'm all right.

334
00:17:53,240 --> 00:17:55,240
Davey, you'll be staying the night.

335
00:17:55,240 --> 00:17:57,240
Oh, you're going to run that past me first.

336
00:17:57,240 --> 00:18:00,240
No, it's the storm, Davey. It's the storm. I can't leave.

337
00:18:00,240 --> 00:18:02,240
I've got half a roof.

338
00:18:02,240 --> 00:18:03,240
Are you trying to fix it up there?

339
00:18:03,240 --> 00:18:06,240
No, I just don't. Look, I just want my own space.

340
00:18:06,240 --> 00:18:07,240
OK.

341
00:18:07,240 --> 00:18:10,240
Davey, I can have guests. We've talked about this.

342
00:18:10,240 --> 00:18:11,240
I know you can have them.

343
00:18:11,240 --> 00:18:14,240
I don't have to run everything in my life past you, Davey.

344
00:18:14,240 --> 00:18:16,240
It's just a common courtesy.

345
00:18:16,240 --> 00:18:19,240
Davey, let me have friends.

346
00:18:19,240 --> 00:18:23,240
You can have friends, but I also live here and I like my own space.

347
00:18:23,240 --> 00:18:25,240
Oh, no, you do. We're both like it, Davey.

348
00:18:25,240 --> 00:18:27,240
That's why it's our house, but still.

349
00:18:27,240 --> 00:18:30,240
It's just over for a cup and then it's the storm.

350
00:18:30,240 --> 00:18:33,240
So let him stay. Let him stay in our bed, Davey.

351
00:18:33,240 --> 00:18:37,240
Davey, Davey, what if I become more friendly with you and then it's...

352
00:18:37,240 --> 00:18:38,240
I'm also your guest.

353
00:18:38,240 --> 00:18:39,240
I'd love that.

354
00:18:39,240 --> 00:18:44,240
All right, all right. I'll give it a go, but only because it's really picking up.

355
00:18:44,240 --> 00:18:45,240
OK, so you're going to come down?

356
00:18:45,240 --> 00:18:49,240
Yeah, I'll come down. Hold on, hold on. Let me just get dressed.

357
00:18:49,240 --> 00:18:52,240
You know, for a while I was really worried that Davey was what fell off your roof,

358
00:18:52,240 --> 00:18:54,240
but it's good to know that...

359
00:18:54,240 --> 00:18:56,240
He had himself anchored in there.

360
00:18:56,240 --> 00:18:57,240
Oh, good.

361
00:18:57,240 --> 00:18:59,240
Don't you worry about that.

362
00:18:59,240 --> 00:19:00,240
Into the hooks on the walls.

363
00:19:00,240 --> 00:19:03,240
That must be painful for a naked man.

364
00:19:03,240 --> 00:19:04,240
Or at least chilly.

365
00:19:04,240 --> 00:19:05,240
I don't know how he does it.

366
00:19:05,240 --> 00:19:09,240
All right, so you handshake or hug, man?

367
00:19:09,240 --> 00:19:11,240
How about a handshake into a hug?

368
00:19:11,240 --> 00:19:12,240
I don't like that. Pick one.

369
00:19:12,240 --> 00:19:13,240
He doesn't like that.

370
00:19:13,240 --> 00:19:15,240
Get off the fence. Get off the fence and pick.

371
00:19:15,240 --> 00:19:16,240
A handshake?

372
00:19:16,240 --> 00:19:17,240
Handshake, yeah.

373
00:19:17,240 --> 00:19:18,240
Sorry, my hands.

374
00:19:18,240 --> 00:19:19,240
Sorry, my hands sweat.

375
00:19:19,240 --> 00:19:21,240
Oh, nice.

376
00:19:21,240 --> 00:19:22,240
Yeah, you know what? We do that.

377
00:19:22,240 --> 00:19:24,240
OK, that's really nice.

378
00:19:24,240 --> 00:19:26,240
Wait, I know why my hands sweat.

379
00:19:26,240 --> 00:19:27,240
Hyperhidrosis.

380
00:19:27,240 --> 00:19:29,240
Oh, my dad had that.

381
00:19:29,240 --> 00:19:30,240
Yeah, it's a tough way to be.

382
00:19:30,240 --> 00:19:31,240
Yeah, yeah.

383
00:19:31,240 --> 00:19:32,240
People think you're nervous.

384
00:19:32,240 --> 00:19:38,240
I feel every single lie detector test done at the police station every single time.

385
00:19:38,240 --> 00:19:40,240
I know. I'm the last one to rest with my dad.

386
00:19:40,240 --> 00:19:41,240
Really?

387
00:19:41,240 --> 00:19:43,240
You would never have met a more innocent man.

388
00:19:43,240 --> 00:19:45,240
You know what? I can see why you like him.

389
00:19:45,240 --> 00:19:46,240
I could have hyperhidrosis.

390
00:19:46,240 --> 00:19:47,240
I don't.

391
00:19:47,240 --> 00:19:48,240
You could do. Yeah, anyone.

392
00:19:48,240 --> 00:19:49,240
Yeah.

393
00:19:49,240 --> 00:19:50,240
Oh.

394
00:19:50,240 --> 00:19:51,240
I'm just saying. I'm just joining in.

395
00:19:51,240 --> 00:19:52,240
No, good for you.

396
00:19:52,240 --> 00:19:53,240
No, no, of course. Yeah.

397
00:19:53,240 --> 00:19:55,240
Sorry, I didn't mean to. It's your friend.

398
00:19:55,240 --> 00:19:56,240
Thanks, Davey. Thanks.

399
00:19:56,240 --> 00:19:58,240
I knew you didn't have hyperhidrosis anyway.

400
00:19:58,240 --> 00:20:00,240
You never say things like that to me, Davey.

401
00:20:00,240 --> 00:20:02,240
Well, I mean, I don't know for sure.

402
00:20:02,240 --> 00:20:03,240
I'm not a doctor.

403
00:20:03,240 --> 00:20:05,240
You could have like a dormant case.

404
00:20:05,240 --> 00:20:07,240
Why don't you ever just make a decision in your life?

405
00:20:07,240 --> 00:20:08,240
I made a decision.

406
00:20:08,240 --> 00:20:11,240
The decision is that I'm going to defer to the professional.

407
00:20:11,240 --> 00:20:12,240
That's not a decision.

408
00:20:12,240 --> 00:20:13,240
It is a decision.

409
00:20:13,240 --> 00:20:15,240
That's just running away.

410
00:20:15,240 --> 00:20:16,240
It's not.

411
00:20:15,240 --> 00:20:17,240
Running away from life.

412
00:20:17,240 --> 00:20:21,240
That is a little bit like going to your hole in the roof and undressing.

413
00:20:21,240 --> 00:20:23,240
You can't live your life in that hole, Davey.

414
00:20:23,240 --> 00:20:26,240
I didn't go up there. I was undressed already.

415
00:20:26,240 --> 00:20:28,240
Oh, OK. That's a bit better, I guess. Yeah.

416
00:20:28,240 --> 00:20:32,240
Yes. Look, I put on this kimono and I came down here.

417
00:20:32,240 --> 00:20:33,240
It's very silky.

418
00:20:33,240 --> 00:20:34,240
I feel attacked now.

419
00:20:34,240 --> 00:20:38,240
I understand why your hands could be wet then because you can't really wipe off on a kimono.

420
00:20:38,240 --> 00:20:39,240
Should have had the hug.

421
00:20:39,240 --> 00:20:41,240
That would have been nice. Yeah.

422
00:20:41,240 --> 00:20:42,240
I'm a great hugger.

423
00:20:42,240 --> 00:20:46,240
Well, I was under pressure, so I chose what I thought would be more respectable.

424
00:20:46,240 --> 00:20:48,240
Even though my hands are...

425
00:20:48,240 --> 00:20:49,240
You're a people pleaser. I get it.

426
00:20:49,240 --> 00:20:51,240
Yeah. That's all I'm trying to do.

427
00:20:51,240 --> 00:20:53,240
There go the lights.

428
00:20:53,240 --> 00:20:55,240
God, thank goodness you have all this power.

429
00:20:55,240 --> 00:20:58,240
God, we'd be lost without all these candles.

430
00:20:58,240 --> 00:21:00,240
Whose hand was that?

431
00:21:00,240 --> 00:21:01,240
Mine.

432
00:21:01,240 --> 00:21:02,240
Oh.

433
00:21:02,240 --> 00:21:04,240
Davey, why do you ever do that?

434
00:21:04,240 --> 00:21:06,240
Well, I thought I was, but...

435
00:21:06,240 --> 00:21:08,240
Make a decision in your life, Davey.

436
00:21:08,240 --> 00:21:11,240
Well, I picked the wrong person with my hands. I'm sorry.

437
00:21:11,240 --> 00:21:14,240
I didn't hear any complaints. I just assumed it was you.

438
00:21:14,240 --> 00:21:17,240
Well, I guess we're all not complaining.

439
00:21:17,240 --> 00:21:19,240
You know what, Davey? Just go back to your hole.

440
00:21:19,240 --> 00:21:22,240
No. No. I'm quite happy here.

441
00:21:22,240 --> 00:21:25,240
Is that not your hand on my phone?

442
00:21:25,240 --> 00:21:26,240
No? No?

443
00:21:26,240 --> 00:21:28,240
It's not mine either.

444
00:21:28,240 --> 00:21:29,240
Oh.

445
00:21:29,240 --> 00:21:30,240
It's mine.

446
00:21:30,240 --> 00:21:32,240
Oh, God. Have you been here the whole time?

447
00:21:32,240 --> 00:21:33,240
Have I?

448
00:21:33,240 --> 00:21:35,240
Sorry. Sorry I didn't invite you up.

449
00:21:35,240 --> 00:21:36,240
It's okay. I'm here now.

450
00:21:36,240 --> 00:21:37,240
Oh, that's good.

451
00:21:37,240 --> 00:21:38,240
Ah.

452
00:21:38,240 --> 00:21:39,240
Mmm.

453
00:21:39,240 --> 00:21:40,240
Ah.

454
00:21:40,240 --> 00:21:42,240
Your kimono is more revealing.

455
00:21:42,240 --> 00:21:44,240
It's practically see-through. I've worn it out.

456
00:21:44,240 --> 00:21:45,240
Yeah.

457
00:21:45,240 --> 00:21:46,240
Oh, boy.

458
00:21:46,240 --> 00:21:48,240
I'll be up in the hole if you need me.

459
00:21:48,240 --> 00:21:53,240
Sorry. Sorry, Mark. I should have told you I had a guest over, too.

460
00:21:53,240 --> 00:21:56,240
Just talk to me when you have a guest. That's all I'm asking, Davey.

461
00:21:56,240 --> 00:21:58,240
Okay. We'll throw in a lot tonight.

462
00:21:58,240 --> 00:22:00,240
Was that an open invitation to the hole?

463
00:22:00,240 --> 00:22:01,240
Uh, no. He's my friend.

464
00:22:01,240 --> 00:22:02,240
Okay.

465
00:22:02,240 --> 00:22:03,240
It's my hole.

466
00:22:03,240 --> 00:22:04,240
Well, fair enough. No.

467
00:22:04,240 --> 00:22:05,240
You're overstepping here.

468
00:22:05,240 --> 00:22:09,240
Yeah, I know. It's just that was a very revealing kimono, so.

469
00:22:09,240 --> 00:22:10,240
He's a very open guy.

470
00:22:10,240 --> 00:22:12,240
This is the strongest decision you've ever made, Davey.

471
00:22:12,240 --> 00:22:13,240
Mmm.

472
00:22:13,240 --> 00:22:16,240
Not tonight. Not in front of a guest.

473
00:22:16,240 --> 00:22:18,240
We just turned the pyrophone down.

474
00:22:18,240 --> 00:22:30,240
Cozy.

475
00:22:30,240 --> 00:22:34,240
Back to Dunbracken is created, produced and edited by Conneth McBae.

476
00:22:34,240 --> 00:22:42,240
For more information on the podcast, including the weekly town newsletter, you can follow us at DunbrackenPod on Instagram.

477
00:22:42,240 --> 00:22:59,240
This episode featured Patrick Meyer, Marcus Keely, Christine Clark, James Geddes, David McCauley, Min Witts, Adam Crossan, Owen Fox and Aaron Marshall.

478
00:22:59,240 --> 00:23:07,240
The opening and closing music was created by Conor Mallon, and you can check out his entire album on Earth on Spotify now.

479
00:23:07,240 --> 00:23:12,240
Thank you for listening. We look forward to welcoming you back to Dunbracken very soon.