Hey, hey, hey, it's Chaos Queen here, and you're
listening to the Geekcast Radio Network. Hey,
it's Mistress Carrie, and you are listening to
Studio 2009. Something I can do for you, Lieutenant?
No, just... See, the streetlight is broken. I
bet the kids did that. I remember that's what
we used to do. Throw rocks, break the streetlight.
We here at the Geekcast Radio Network of Podcasts
are here to entertain you. We are into entertaining
our audience with discussions from media and
content we love, from TV shows, film, music,
comics, video games, and more. However, sometimes
politics creeps into that content. that we consume.
That's the case here with this episode of Columbo.
I'm TF2 and Mike, and my personal opinion that
goes outside of the realm of the Geekcast Radio
Network and is not sponsored by the Geekcast
Radio Network in any way is that all politicians
are corrupt, period, end of line, man. There
is nothing wrong with your podcast player. Do
not attempt to adjust the volume. Hello and welcome
back into our studio. You are now inside Studio
2009. As you have already heard, I am TF2 and
Mike. Joining me once again is that good old
detective, Dave Draper. Hi, Dave. How are you?
That was not the disclaimer I expected, but okay.
Hi, I'm fine. What did you expect? given the
subject matter of the episode, a little more
specific. But, I mean, we'll get there, I guess.
Yeah, we'll get there. It's got politics in it,
folks. It's called... It's just... So, it's weird.
Like, this episode was filmed and created before
even the Reagan assassination, let alone recent
events. Yeah. But there is this almost eerie
prescience to it. And given – let's just say
half the country will feel that this is a very
prescient episode, and half the country would
be like, man, that's just the liberal bias of
the blah, blah, blah. I mean it's not the first
time that this sort of story has been told. I
remember in the 80s or 90s, I think there was
this – I read the book. I think it was called
Favorite Son, and they did a miniseries with
– I can't remember the guy's name, but he was
in Clash of Titans and LA Law. But anyway, it
was – so this – introduce the episode. The listener
will pretty much figure out what we're talking
about pretty quickly. Yeah, I'm here. I'm here.
Did they get you? No, I'm here. I was trying
to find favorite son. Okay. I can't remember
the guy's name. Corbin Bernson? No, not Corbin
Bernson. The other one. The original star of
L .A. Law. Corbin Bernson was a breakout star.
Jimmy Smith? Who else was a breakout star of
L .A. Law? This was the anchor guy, particularly
in the first couple of seasons. Not Susan Day
either. No, no, no. Yeah, I – not – no, Corbin
Bernson was Arnie. The old guy. No! Oh, my God.
I don't know. Anyway. Just introduce the episode
and I will look it up. Yeah, yeah, I'm working
on it. Today we do our journey as we put our
– detective hats on or trench coats or something.
We put something on. Jump back in time with Columbo.
These are the Columbo files here inside Studio
2009. Starting at the beginning, as always, going
forward in time, through time, in order. Main
source online is 2B .TV, but it is also on Peacock
and other places as well. A really crummy DVD
set. They must have gone with a different company
because, man, I'm unhappy. Oh, no. Oh, no. So
they do the cheap thing where like it's a two
sided DVD. Yeah, that was the old garbage. Yep,
yep, yep. That was the old days. Today is season
three, episode three, and we are involved with
a candidate for crime. Oh, boy. Anytime politics.
This is why I've never seen the West Wing. And
it's not I don't do politics. I don't like politics
in my television. I don't like. political shows.
I was fine with... Oh, Favorite Son was before
L .A. Law. I was fine with Winter Soldier because
it was one movie. It was fine. But TV shows?
I don't like long -running... L .A. Law I'm fine
with because it's lawyers. It's not strictly
politics. But shows that center around politics,
I just... tune out. Well, West Wing, first of
all, it's a very good show. I'm not saying it's
not. I know you're not, but what I'm saying is
what was interesting about that is that it was
almost like the fantasy of the president we all
wanted. You know what I mean? Yeah. And it was.
It was the president that we all really hoped
to have someday. Technical difficulties. Let's
move on, shall we? You were saying? Well, West
Wing is, I mean, it really kind of is a fantasy
because everyone's noble. Everyone's doing what
we want the people in those positions to do.
Right. And I think the real world is much muddier
and messier. As I said repeatedly during this
particular election cycle, people don't get to
that level and be clean. You know what I mean?
You don't get to run for that kind of office
and still have your morals and your – you compromise
somewhere along the way. Right. This one is –
and the thing we're dancing around – so the premise
is that Jackie Coogan, right? Cooper. It's so
funny. Jackie Coogan, he's a – Perry White in
the Superman films. Yeah, that's what's so funny
to me. I'm like, I looked at his name like Jackie
Cooper as Nelson Hayward. I'm like. No, it's
Cooper. Is it Cooper? Yeah, it's Cooper. Yeah,
I'm looking at it right now. Jackie Cooper. I
believe you. Yep. Yeah, Jackie Cooper. I'm like,
wait a minute. I know that. That's Perry White
in the Superman movies. He was also, I believe
he was the kid in the Charlie Chaplin film, The
Kid. Oh, very cool. Well, at this point, if I'm
getting the name wrong, I might... I thought
that was the deal. Because he was an old, old...
Oh, he was Cooper. Who am I? I guess. I'm stupid.
Jackie Cooper is probably somebody else. I am
not quite old enough to have starred in a Charlie
Chaplin film, but... Pretty close. But yeah,
as I remember, he was an old child star who kind
of got a second bite. Anyway, he's... He's playing
a guy named Hanlon, which is – well, I'll mention
that in the next episode, actually. There's a
reference. There's continuity. It's the Columbo
Cinematic Universe. Yes. I was really excited
about that. Yes. But he's playing a guy who's
running for Senate of California. Nelson Hayward,
yep. He's Nelson Hayward, and he's having an
affair with his wife's assistant, and his campaign
manager wants him to break that up. And so he
basically fakes death threats, although – now
keep in mind this is in the early 70s. This is
after Kennedy. This is after the other Kennedy
who died in California. I could be wrong. This
is after Martin Luther King. This is after several
high -profile political assassinations. I think
that's the context of this episode. per se um
so he's he's but he's faking these threats and
he manipulates events so that his campaign manager
is dressed in his camel hair jacket and goes
to his house and he kills him now one of my biggest
issues with this episode i mean they established
that the guy is not very popular the campaign
manager is an unlikable guy but like I think
this has the least motivation of any Columbo
killing – I mean established, like explained.
Usually it's pretty obvious why they're doing
what they're doing. Yeah. I would say maybe 30%,
40 % of the time it's almost sympathetic. Yep.
Whereas this one, it's like you don't like him.
Okay. He wants to break you – like he wants to
– this is back before Clinton where you could
just do what you want. Yeah. I don't know. It
was the least. motivated killing so far yeah
but he gets caught up in like a whole bunch of
but the the fact that it's a political assassination
uh i is is is why i thought we were gonna kind
of pussyfoot around a little bit because we were
recording this in this is like like what well
actually it happened what during the summer point
being there was an assassination attempt on the
The whole question, there is a question in the
country whether it was real or not. Yeah. That
was the point of Favorite Son was that the guy
was running, I think, for president, and he actually
has a guy shoot him. And someone finds out that
the whole thing was staged. It was a staged thing.
No, it's Harry Hamlin, by the way. Oh, yeah.
Harry Hamlin. Okay. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I
remember. Okay. As opposed to the Puppet Birds
in Clash of Titans. Anyway. Point being, I think
we're kind of like, you know, you're going to
get in trouble. I feel like you're going to get
in trouble whether you go one way or the other
with what happened in real life, which is why
I think we're a little, which is why you want
to avoid politics in general. And I'm kind of
like, this is a little twitchy. This is the context
of the show. Yeah, it's the context of this episode.
I don't think Columbo has many. killing episodes?
I think this is the only one. Okay, good. Then
we're safe. I mean, the only one out of X number
of episodes of the entire series, including the
reboots and the redos and the... Okay, but I'm
saying, like, I'll look it up later. Yeah, fine,
but I'm saying, like, I'll look it up when we
go to break later, but I'm just saying, like,
one episode... Yeah, I think this is the only
one where a candidate... Stages a fake assassination
attempt. Yeah. I think we're safe. It's okay.
Well, yeah. Like, it's, you know, whatever. And
honestly, like, I remember that whole thing that
happened that you're referring to with the current
president that we have. And I'm like, oh, yeah,
I don't know what to think about. I remember
all the upheaval. When that happened, where it's
like, oh my god. I remember seeing all the news
footage of everybody just running. That's all
I remember. Because I remember the news today,
you can't trust it because everybody has an agenda.
Yeah, that is true. Granted, not that the news
didn't have an agenda. 30, 40, 50 years ago,
but it's more pronounced now. It's more obvious
now that every single news station in this United
States of ours has a specific agenda. Like, we
know certain news channels are certain parties.
Certain news channels. I think the trick, for
me, the trick with news these days is like movie
reviews. You go into it knowing their bias and
accepting that they have a bias. And you view
it through that filter because I think you get
yourself in trouble if you're like, well, my
guys only tell the truth because that's the perfect
way to get lied to and manipulated is if you
just accept that one side is true and one side
is false. Because that's never the way. God,
it's actually a quote from the guy, and I don't
want to make it, but to quote George Lucas, episode
three, there are heroes on both sides. Well,
it is the third episode's 20th anniversary this
year, so why not celebrate it? I mean, on a side
note, the news broke this week that maybe we
might get rid of Kathleen Kennedy finally. No,
she's gone. No, she's not gone. She was going
to leave at the end of the year, and now there's
rumors that she might stay on just to punish
us. What? Yeah, I've heard. No, I thought the
news was out that she left. It was, it was, she
didn't leave. The news was, I don't know, it
leaked that she was going to. Oh. She didn't
formally announce it. The suspicion is she wanted
to announce it at Celebration Japan or whatever.
Celebrate. Hey, man, Star Wars used to be worth
celebrating. No, no, no, no, no. What I'm scoffing
at is Celebration Japan. It's not the celebration
part. It's the Japan part. Japanese aren't allowed
to like Star Wars? No, no, no, no. It's not about
the Japanese aren't allowed to like Star Wars.
It's about the fact that how much is a ticket
to Japan? We can't afford that. Okay, how much
is a ticket to America? They can't afford that,
but that's the point, is that it's so dang expensive
to go to any of these dang conventions. This
is a topic for a different day, not for Columbo,
but yeah, I'm still scrolling to see if I can
find a more accurate news source for Kennedy
and her. Yeah, Kennedy and her. Oh, dude. Oh,
Kathleen. Kathleen. I'm getting all tripped up
in my brain. Do you watch Clownfish? Not really.
Okay. Time to time. Okay. Well, all of the videos
that I've seen them put out talking about this,
talking about Kathleen Kennedy potentially leaving
or hopefully leaving, every thumbnail for them.
What they use to describe it is K .K. I don't
know what you mean by that exactly. I honestly
don't. It's just her initials because it's Kathleen
Kennedy, but they use K .K. Well, I mean, I've
seen thumbnails with Wizard of Oz, Ding Dong,
The Witch is Dead. I'm sure a couple of them
have played that. I've seen the Cartman. I've
seen the carbon clip like a dozen times now,
but a chicken air maker gate, you know, like
they just, I don't know. I think it's always
been a mistake to make it personal for me. It's
just like, she has done a poor job managing the
brands. Absolutely. She should have been gone
a while ago. Yeah. They should have put Filoni
and Favreau in charge immediately. Not immediately,
but I mean, not immediately because of her. I
think Lucas recommended her. She was in a co
-role with Lucas before he sold it. She had the
resume. Particularly Solo. I think Solo was the
tipping point. All this is completely relevant
to the episode of Columbo. But Solo was the tipping
point because I think the production was a problem
and the results were a problem. And I think anyone
else would have been quietly shown the door.
Yeah, probably. But heaven forbid, George Lucas'
secretary never be shown the door. No, she was
more Spielberg's. Oh, okay, whatever. I'm sorry,
accuracy. So it's funny that before I even played
the episode, Candidate for Crime. I didn't read
the Wikipedia article, but I had pulled it up
at the same time as I pulled up the episode on
Tubi. And the first thing I saw right before
I switched over was Harry Stone. Just the name.
Oh, yeah. Didn't even. First thought was, wait
a minute. What's Judge Harry Stone from Night
Court doing in Columbo? I missed that. I think
he. Yeah, he did pass away. Yeah, that's what
I thought. I miss that guy. As we often say,
folks, we record two of these at a time. Out
of the two episodes, this is my lead. This one
might actually get my lowest score out of all
of the Columbos we've done. I did not have any
interest in this episode whatsoever. You're right.
This took the longest and most undeliberate time
to actually kill someone. Like, really? For me,
it was more like I still, by the end of the episode,
I don't know why he did it. Yeah, just because
he disliked him for no... Because the guy had
been with him his whole career. Yeah. It was
sort of implied it was to keep the girlfriend?
Yeah. At the end of the day, that's what it really
was. But at the same time, it's like, that's
still... Not enough because that's probably not
his first girlfriend. Oh, no. I mean, it was
implied that they literally say that the marriage
is on the rocks to begin with. Yeah. Oh, my God.
His wife. Is it this episode or is it the next
one? One of the wives in these episodes. It has
to be this one because Robert Culp doesn't have
a wife. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So it's this one. I
think he does, but you never see her. Okay, fine.
This is the one where. Yeah, because this is
the one she flirts with Columbo, doesn't she,
a little bit? I didn't pick up on that. I mean,
to be fair, my ability to determine whether or
not a girl is flirting with me is notoriously
poor. When we first see the senator's wife. Yeah.
Well, he's not a senator yet, but. Okay, candidate,
fine. When we first see, what's his stupid name?
When we first see Hayward's wife. She's wearing
this. It's at the party. She's wearing this sheer
everything all over. She's practically naked.
I saw her nipples four times in this episode.
I'm not kidding. I did not take screenshots,
but I will take screenshots. I saw her nipples
twice in the first 20 minutes. Not for period
reasons because I have access to the internet,
but you're going to make me go back and use that
horrible DVD. No, I don't remember that at all.
In 70s TV? Are you insane? I'm not kidding, dude.
I saw it. And also, she's like, go away. I'm
having a party. And he's like, uh, please, ma
'am. Okay, well, go get a sandwich. Beat it.
Exactly. There is a shot in here where she is
standing straight up and facing the camera, looking
at the camera, where I swear I can see her nipple
through her see -through gown dress thing, whatever
she's wearing. And I will not make you go back
and look through your horrible DVD. I'm going
to do it anyway now. I will take the screen cap
for you. You don't trust me? Like, seriously?
Okay, I hate to say this because I keep having
to say this all the time with people, but I believe
that you believe that you saw that, but I cannot
believe that that was allowed on TV in the mid
-70s. Okay, here's what we're going to do, folks.
You're not going to hear or see this, obviously.
After we finish the recording, I will do screen
share with you, and I will play it live, and
you will see. I'm just like, we are like... We
are literally less than a decade away from people
being allowed to sleep in the same bed. I know,
right? And she's not... She's not a particularly
sexual character. No, she's not. But I'm telling
you, man. I'm not making this up. I would not...
Trust me, I would not make this up. It's just
something I noticed. Because I was like... because
you're right absolutely this is the decade where
the husband and wife sleep in separate beds yada
yada yada button up button up all this all that
everything else i mean there's been a lot of
flirting with a lot of the wives and things like
that in the past especially with oh what was
her um goldie yeah obviously but no the this
wife i'm telling you you could basically see
everything almost at least the top half uh so
yeah um but yeah i particularly didn't care for
this it's it's not one i would revisit like we've
said the murder doesn't seem like like it would
be different if she blackmailed him like if she
tried to get money out of him The secretary?
Yeah. I don't think she tried that. Did she?
No, no. She was a true believer. Yeah. She's
in love with him. I'm like, what is she – aside
from the fact that Harry was trying to break
them up, what does blackmailing him have to do
with Harry getting murdered? Oh, I'm not – I'm
mixing the – I'm pulling a Dave here. I'm mixing
the two up. It would be – yeah. What hurts is
that's accurate. sorry hey you you can pull accuracy
on me anytime you want anytime i fuck up because
i fuck up a lot so but it's one of those things
where yeah it's like it it does there are elements
i don't dislike the episode but there are elements
that feel off i mean at the same time you've
got the the bit with the car I think the bit
with the car is in this one where he's got to
take it into the shop and gets a crushing bill
for $65. It's like, damn. I was going to ask
you about that. So I wrote all of this down because
that was more interesting to me than any of the
political bullshit. So I was going to ask you
about this because he says, what does he say,
$65 .28? Something like that, sure. It was $65.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, it was $65. And then
he does the, like, okay, are you going to ask
me what a counter check is? Because I don't know.
Okay, I'm going to look that up. And I'm like,
how do you write a check from not, like, because
I happen to know my account number just for reasons,
like, maybe most people know their checking account
number. I don't know how many people even have
checks anymore. But, like, it just seems weird
that you'd write this check. on another company's
check thing and it would like because you need
to know your bank number at least it was weird
but I at the time I was well no I was potty trained
by the time I was two so I was potty trained
and reading but um because I was I peaked as
a baby uh but uh um it's been downhill since
then but my point being I was not writing checks
I don't know what counter checks are Okay, so
this is silly. I don't know if they made it up.
No, I'm sure it's a thing. No, no, no. I'm talking
about the term. Even though it's in the Merriam
-Webster dictionary, I don't know if somebody
made it up somewhere or whatever. Essentially,
it's a blank check. He was asking him for a blank
check. According to what this says in the Merriam
-Webster dictionary, a counter check. Counter
check. Merriam -Webster .com dictionary. Really?
Seriously? Noun. A blank check available at a
bank usually to be cashed only at a bank by the
person writing the check. That's what a counter
check is. Why would the auto guy have a blank
check that Columbo could use that isn't attached
to – blank checks have to be attached to your
– wait a minute. Blank checks not be attached
to accounts? I don't know how that works. That
was my point. Yeah, that makes no sense. Yeah,
exactly. That makes absolutely no sense, which
means this episode gets even less points from
me because that's stupid. Look, folks, I don't
really want to give Columbo negative points here,
but this episode is getting lower and lower in
my mind because none of this is making any sense,
and I blame politics. Okay, his needing to get
the car fixed had nothing to do with politics.
No, no, no. Even that part's a little weird to
me because I don't know if I've just been the
biggest criminal my whole life or if I just live
in an area where they don't do inspections for
cars. Because I know that's a big thing in some
places, but I've never had to take my car in
and get it looked at. And Colombo gets stopped
on the street. Yeah, that was weird to me. No,
no, especially in L .A. I can see that happening.
Okay. But, yeah, like, he had not had his car
pass inspection and was missing a lot of things
and having a lot of issues. There was a lot of
comedic bits in this one, like, more so, like,
and what I mean by that is non -associated with
the, well, I mean, kind of associated, but Columbo
doing goofy things off by himself. Yep. Then
we've seen in a lot of episodes, like, because
there's this whole thing. Which is an important
plot point where, like I said, to get Harry killed,
they had swapped coats. And so a new coat shows
up at Hayward's office. And Columbo goes to the
tailor to see if he can get a coat made in a
rush. I mean, the whole point is that he wants
to get the coat, find out if you can get a coat
made in two days, basically. And you can't. And
Hayward has a pretty good argument against that,
which is, well, the coat was old and it was falling
apart. It just happened that I ordered it. And
honestly, I don't know. That's one of those weirder
points where I honestly believe that maybe he
did want it. It's like, had he had this planned
for weeks? This is weird. And then at the end,
I kind of like the ending and I kind of don't
because there's this whole thing about the phone
system. which is literally never mentioned once
until the very end like you were in your room
when you had this phone system and i was waiting
for it lined up and i'm like were you you were
asleep yeah i was paying attention to that because
i was paying attention to colombo this whole
episode because colombo he looked like he's sick
He looked like he got a fever. He looked like
he's got the flu. Isn't this the episode where
he went to the dentist? Yes. That dentist did
something to him. I know he had to have a...
No, I'm not kidding. He had to have a wisdom
tooth pulled. Yeah, I know. He had to have a
wisdom tooth pulled and they had to do something
to his root canal or to his molar or something
or other or whatever. Or he had to have a cavity
filled or he had to... I don't trust... Look,
as much as... bill cosby is a criminal this is
like hitting all your your triggers aren't isn't
it like dentists and politicians that's right
as much as bill cosby is a criminal i still love
certain episodes of the cosby show and if there
wasn't anything that the cosby show taught me
in the 1980s is the episode where rudy and her
friend uh peter have to go to the dentist And
they did not want to go to the dentist. And the
dentist had to basically sing them a song to
get them to open their mouth. So it's one of
those things where I don't trust. I trust the
eye doctor more than I trust the dentist. So
it's one of those things where he looks bad in
this episode. Like I said, like he's got a fever
or the flu or a cold or something. So he's laying
on this couch. He's flipping and flopping over
like a dead fish. He's switching positions. He's
got the newspaper over his head. He's always,
you know, Lieutenant phone. Now the guy comes
in because he specifically asked that if Hayward
was alone. Right. Yeah. No, absolutely. But every
time he has to take the paper off of his head
because he's got the newspaper over his head.
But he's also watching that – Okay, okay, I believe
you. I didn't really pick up on that, but I believe
you. Yeah, so he's watching this phone. That's
why at the end it may seem like it's a thing,
but he was actually watching the phone to see
if it would light up because the phone systems
are tied together. Well, I – let me put it this
way. I don't think – I wasn't accusing them of
pulling it completely out of nowhere. Right.
I think it was more like the fact that the system
was – he's like, you put in this elaborate system.
It's like, okay, well, you never mentioned that
once. It was like, okay, you were looking at
the phone, but we didn't – I didn't know. Like
the phone system was like a connected thing.
I didn't even realize that was his – I thought
that was just a hotel room that they were in.
I didn't realize it was like a – It's a giant
suite that I have a problem with because at the
end of the episode, there are way too many goddamn
people in that one room. In the room where he
does the shooting. That's what happens because
you don't know much about politics. That's what
happens on election night is they go to a hotel.
They're all crammed into a room together. Right.
Yeah, but still, no. You can have your campaign
headquarters anywhere. Hell, you can still have
your campaign headquarters in a hotel. You can
use one of their banquet halls, which is actually
made for campaign headquartering. You don't need
to. Be stuck in a double deluxe Holiday Inn Express
in the middle of nowhere. Well, some of it also
was – I mean, this is a TV show. I remember there
was like a – I know. I can't remember if it was
– I think it was this episode, but I'm not sure,
where there was like a scene. Oh, it is. It's
the scene in the garage. Yep. And that looked
fake. Yes, it did. They go to an elevator, and
it looked like just a little – it didn't look
like an elevator. It didn't look like the – No.
Like it looked like a little rectangular room.
Which I know an elevator is, but you know what
I mean. There's like mechanics of the door. Yeah,
it did not look like an elevator. It just looked
like the shape of an elevator boxed out. Maybe
NBC was cutting back on the old mystery movies
that year. I don't know. Maybe they were. So
this was an hour and a half, I think. It was
a long one. Yeah, this was an hour and a half.
It took an hour and 14 minutes for the killer
to get caught. So what did they do for the other
15 minutes? I don't know. Usually I take that
time to notice how fast Columbo came in, but
Columbo was kind of in on this almost from the
beginning because of the protection for the candidate.
I did not like this episode. I've said that already
in this podcast. This episode was the episode
so far out of the entire series where I'm like,
okay. i'm gonna go play pong i'm gonna go get
some popcorn i'm gonna go to the bathroom i'm
gonna go check the projection room continuity
for the next podcast i'm going to do everything
i can do to not have to like i wanted to do everything
else other than finish watching this thing this
thing just well we probably should explain that
at the very end like the whole thing is colombo
decides figures out that that that there isn't
someone trying to kill hayward And then they
tried to kill Harry or they did kill Harry. And
Heywood is like and this is actually this seems
to be the moment where Columbo twigs on on Heywood
because Heywood's like, no, no, they're trying
to kill me. They're trying to kill me. And Columbo's
like, it's a good moment, I think. He's like,
yeah, I'd be happy if I found out that someone
wasn't going to kill me. Yeah. And so at the
end, Heywood stages a second assassination attempt
in his little side hotel room, which is why he
was alone and he set it up. He shot the gun into
the wall with a silencer. and kind of tried to
cover it up and then was going to pretend like
afterwards he set off a firecracker on the fire
escape to sound like a gun. Okay, he set up the
gunshot before he left to go vote, and when they
came back, he put a firecracker on the fire escape.
Now, as it happens, when I was a kid, someone
threw a firecracker into my house, and it was
like I had a slate landing or whatever you call
it, a little entry room from the front door,
and there was always a burn mark on that slate
from that. moment on so i'm like you're not gonna
get away with like that not being noticed no
but anyway the point being that colombo because
he had noticed that the phone didn't light up
yeah i'd come in while they were out at vote
and it already dug out the bullet so that's how
he gets him that's how he gets him which is a
pretty good for oh i mean for colombo getting
him that's a pretty good get him yeah the twist
the get him in this was really good yeah Again,
Columbo makes this episode. Columbo makes every
episode. Okay, yeah, but like... Okay, Columbo,
let me put it this way. I think the really exceptional
episodes are the ones, like any port in a storm,
where somebody else helps carry the load. But
for the most part, Columbo makes the episode.
You know what I mean? Right, and we've talked
about this before, where it's not a whodunit,
but it's a howdunit. And this how done it is
so like, I even have a note here about the stupid,
like I said, I even wrote it out with like seven
wise boy, the block letters. I'm like, Oh my
God, you dumb moron. Don't use the serial killer
block lettering. Seriously. Nobody's got no smart
book. God. Oh, Senator for future Senator. But
like there are episodes that we've talked about
so far in the first two seasons and in this third
season so far where we're excited to figure it
out and see how they did it. Even though we know
who did it, we are excited to figure out how
they did it and we're excited to see how Columbo
exposes them. Yeah, I think that the twist is
what you're trying to figure out is how Columbo
figures it out. Right. And this was good on how
he figured it out. It was, but it came in at
the very end. Yeah, it came in at the very end.
And the problem is the rest of this episode.
And again, the murder essentially makes no sense
because other than the fact that just because
you didn't like the guy, like the guy wasn't
trying to blackmail you. The guy was only saying,
hey, look, stop cheating on your wife. Like a
jerk. Oh, God. Yeah. Oh, God. All right, so the
usual questions. Did this show keep your interest
throughout this episode? Not really. Well, apparently
I didn't notice the boobies, so no, I guess.
Well, we'll watch that later. The next episode
is much better than this one, so are we itching
to watch the next episode now? Kind of. No one
should watch this episode. I will blacklist this
episode. I will put this episode in a vault,
never to be seen again. I will bury this episode
in the desert next to that E .T. game. Dang.
Yeah, that's how bad I feel about this episode.
Show me on the doll where the episode touched
you, man. Here, here, and here. Yikes. You asked.
I did. I only pointed to my forehead, my cheek,
and my shoulder, so it's not that bad. All right,
so ratings. Oh, boy. You can go first on this
one, because I guarantee you I'm going to be
way more harsh than you are. Well, I mean, I
was joking about it hitting your triggers, but
apparently it did, and that's... I mean, that's
legit. Like, I've had things where, like, I didn't
like them for personal reasons. It's an okay
episode. Like I said, there are just minor issues
with things. For me, minor issues, which I'm
going to give it a three. It's okay. It's not
one of the better episodes. It's got some stuff
in it that I like. The stuff with him at the
tailor is funny. But, yeah, it's not a favorite.
So three. It's okay. Yeah, the Taylor stuff is
funny and it is good, and yes. And the guy who
plays the Taylor will come back in a different
role. Cool. Awesome. Very cool, very cool. We
also got more of the little Columbo -isms. He
did do this old man. He had talked about his
wife. I always say that his wife loved Hayward
because it's always like his wife loves all these
murderers. So that was funny. Yeah. Just to remind
the audience, in case you haven't listened to
one of our episodes at all on Studio 2009, 3
.0, average, meh. It's not bad, but it's not
amazing either. Nothing really stands out, and
it's forgettable. Now for me, folks, with this
episode, I'm debating between 1 .5 and 1 .0.
The Columbo -isms and the Taylor are great, but
they don't save it from anything higher. They're
good. I loved it. Columbo is really the only
reason why it isn't getting a zero. So you're
saying Columbo is the only reason to watch Columbo?
Okay, well, yes, but... I'm sorry? So, for definitions,
a 1 .5 is really bad. Barely any good stuff,
lots of failures, with a couple of epic disasters
thrown in. The few successes are like tiny islands
in a sea of disappointment. And terrible, which
is a 1, prepare to be frustrated. This is a mess
with almost no redeeming qualities. One or two
achievements are completely overshadowed by the
overall awfulness. Not the worst of the year,
but definitely a contender. So I think for me,
I'm going to give it a one and a half. I don't
think it really deserves a one yet, and I don't
think that there are other Columbo episodes that
I would give grades this low. But knowing me
and knowing my feelings of certain... ways that
politics are handled in media and television
and movies and things like that it just politics
rubs me the wrong way entered i want my entertaining
to entertain if i can talk i want my entertainment
to be entertaining and politics does not entertain
me i understand what you're saying i and i am
sympathetic i i think my thing is i prefer politics
to well like a cop show is a cop show like i
prefer When the thing is actually about politics,
I'm less bothered than when it's about something
else and it is political. That annoys – like
if it's – and I think that's a thing that we're
dealing with these days where everything has
to be political. I do want to add real quick
because you always ask me if I want to add something.
I think this is the one – like I'm always talking
about like these Columboisms that never seem
to show up, which drive me crazy. But this one,
they had like one that I didn't realize was a
Columboism where it's about the car. yeah and
he goes no i've got another car but it's nothing
special that's the second time he said that yep
my wife drives it it's just transportation yeah
it's just transportation it's nothing special
yeah um special so apparently that's a thing
that he does yep yeah that poor car i love that
car All right, folks. We're going to go to a
quick break. You're going to hear some podcast
ads and some other stuff. We'll come back to
close the show right after this. All I can say,
sir, is whoever did it will get them. Hello,
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Hello, Julie, what the heck are you doing? Trying
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at simplisticreviews .blogspot .com. I'm sure
your insurance company will cover that. No, they
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gun. Here's the bullet. Here's the ballistics
report. No bullet in the wall. Bullet's right
here. It's in my handkerchief. Yeah, there she
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Sergeant Vernon that... We're going to come in
here to make some private telephone calls. I
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is 615 and the press room is 616. When you call
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So I kept watching the phone for 615 to light
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waiting for that button to light up. curious
and when you and your wife when you went to vocal
i took advantage of that opportunity to come
in here and look around and i found that bullet
hole in a glass door and that took me to the
wall i dug this bullet out of that wall three
hours before you said that somebody fired it
at you three minutes ago We are back here inside
Studio 2009, only on the Geekcast Radio Network.
We are on our way to 200 episodes of this podcast.
Any final thoughts for this political assassination
of a Columbo episode, sir? I want to walk a very
fine line here. Okay. Weirdly, it's not the fine
line that I thought I was going to be walking
when we started recording. I feel – I understand
where you're coming from, but I also feel maybe
you're – not everyone is going to have the same
reaction that you did. Obviously. And so I think
you're being a little harsh on the episode, but
I understand that it hits your wrong nerves.
So I'm just saying more for the audience. I'm
not saying this is a great episode and he's crazy
and don't listen to him. He's a madman. It's
an okay episode. I think Mike has been turned
off by certain things and is coming down a little
harder than the episode necessarily deserves.
But that's all I'm going to say. Not a hill I
want to die on for this. You're right. I'm not
arguing. You're right. Absolutely. This episode
is not for me. 100%. I agree with you. It's not
for me. And that's the greatest thing about podcasting
is that we can watch something and we can have
differing opinions. We can have, like, how many
times have you seen Attack the Block? Three or
four, I think. Okay, and it's something you'll
go back to, right? I mean, at this point, I don't
– I get what you're saying. Theoretically, yes.
I don't know if I will before I die, but I don't
know how much longer I have. Stop it. Has the
doctor told you something that you're not telling
us, Dave? Okay, good, because – i've got plenty
of revenge movies to get you back with anyway
you like that movie yeah no i enjoyed my experience
but my point is is that you'll go back to what
you'll watch that movie again i won't that's
the thing same thing with this episode you may
watch this episode again and and like it I probably
will never watch this episode again and like
it, and I'm sure vice versa. There's plenty of
things that I've had you watch that I absolutely
love that you just don't give two rips about
and you'll never watch again. That's the point
of the I like it, you don't, you like it, I don't.
It's okay. It's not a big deal. It's not the
end of the world. The world is not going to explode
because two guys on a podcast don't agree. Well,
we don't know that, but I guess we'll find out.
I guess we'll find out soon enough. Opinions
like assholes. All right. Any other final thoughts?
Let's get out. Let's get the one that we like.
Oh, boy. Thank you for joining us here inside
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Join us next time when we will be discussing
Season 3, Episode 8, Double Exposure. For now,
I am TF2 and Mike with... David Raper. And we'll
hear us back in the studio soon.