This is Lightly Used with Adam and Karen.
Welcome to 2025!
Happy New Year!
And all of that bollocks!
Hope you had a good one, not gonna linger on Christmas and stuff because by the time
this comes out it's nearly Valentine's.
Beaming on.
Yes, Easter depending on how organised Adam is.
Welcome to Lightly Used!
Welcome to Lightly Used episode 14 and our first one of this brand new shiny, spanky,
glorious snow-filled year.
But keeping with tradition we're gonna start with a correction.
When we played Urban Myths last episode I was discarding any ones that you got wrong.
I should have been keeping those letters for myself.
Yeah you should.
We'd just gone through the rules literally seconds earlier.
So have I got you still beat me and you were playing the game completely wrong?
We could have got two rounds in easy.
I was playing the game right and I still lost!
That's why I was saying I'll pick these letters from a discard pile.
I shouldn't have had a discard pile, I should be full face.
Oh my god.
We also have to say thank you very much to Simon and Ross from Who Takes the Socks Off
podcast of having all of the Studio Channel 84 hosts on the Christmas Master of Tasks
special.
If you haven't done so check out the video for that on the YouTube.
Also links will be in the show blog.
And eagle-eyed members of the public may notice Adam doing something truly disgusting but
I'm not going to give you the minute mark.
Let's say about that better.
Nobody said anything until one person said then everybody started saying suddenly everyone
saw.
Nobody saw!
I wish they should have been doing it.
Start retention.
Oh really?
Moving on, in the show we were set up against Tom and Rob, quickly moving on, from the variety
show and the untitled sci-fi show.
One of the tasks was to write a diss track about the other team and each of us secretly
worried that the other team would have to write that.
Yeah.
Praising the other one.
Yeah, well we have to write a diss track but they're going to have to write one about how
lovely we are so we can't be that bad in the diss track.
And they thought exactly the same.
Yeah, so it was quite funny.
But we didn't know that until the night that we were all together recording the final part.
So it was really funny.
So I put my lyrics into an AI music thing and because I'm an idiot the wrong link got
sent to Simon when we were recording the episode.
So instead of an outtake at the very end of this episode I'll put the right version that
I meant to send.
Yay!
So we did go for a bit of a mooch today and we actually found things in the shop for a
change.
Yeah, we did.
It was a nice little ponder about really.
All the pre-Christmas mooching we did and turning up empty handed, empty pocketed, nothing
at all.
We both saw kind of related things today.
We did.
You saw yours first.
They were like you can go first.
That's true.
So in the Welsh Air Ambulance I found a couple of things that I could not leave on the shelf.
One is a Lego item and it is blue and it is a pencil case and it's very basic.
It's just a 2x6.
Yeah, a bit of plastic hollow Lego that I can store in since it sticks in.
It's massively oversized and to go with the massively oversized Lego brick I've got an
oversized Lego fireman with a button in his chest which makes torches in his feet to go
on.
Weirdly his feet do exactly fit your Lego block as well.
Yeah, so maybe I'll donate the block to you and you can have a nice professional Lego
stand to stand on.
I don't know if that will fit on my shelves actually.
Oh yeah, good point.
It won't.
I'll double check how tall some of them are.
You won't be able to stand on it though.
It should look really nice.
Yeah.
I can investigate that.
Maybe you just need another shelf.
I'm running out of room.
Well, you've just bought a shorter sofa.
That's true.
Well, there again, that's the little boards up against the radiator.
I can't, there's not going to be any room.
Also in the same shop I bought a board game, Motorway, the first moving board game for
all the family, an exciting and educational game for two to six players.
It was six pounds.
I thought it was three.
I don't know why I thought.
I was surprised that you picked it up for six quid actually, which is why I said I would
buy it because I was like, we're not leaving that here.
It's got to come over with one of us.
It's the game of Motorway, which looks quite a bit like a Monopoly racetrack board.
We might have to give this a go one day.
Yeah, I think this is going to be featured on the pod as a played game.
I think it needs to be.
It looks like it's going to take up quite a bit of space there.
So that might be one for the very distant future.
One for the dining room table.
You've also got yourself a board game.
I did also get myself a board game in the same shop.
The book is from a different shop.
I got the Criss Cross Quiz, which is harder to say than it looks like it should be from
Chad Valley, owned by somebody called Amanda.
And there are different categories, potluck currency, Africa, nicknames, films, the 20s
and quotations made in England, granddad's top TV quiz game.
Oh, Granada's.
I thought you were going to lead you there, the bloke in the shop.
Oh, Granada TV.
I didn't know what he was talking about because I thought he said Granada.
Oh my God, I need an eye test.
I am due one actually in February.
And yes, Granada's top TV quiz game.
And that is all the information on the box because like a good old battered game, the
rules are probably on the inside of the lid.
Completely blank on the back.
Yeah.
So I've got no idea how to play it, what it is.
It's intriguing.
And this will probably also be featured on the pod at some point in the not too distant
future.
And it was four quid, which, you know, as long as all the bits are in there, I don't
mind.
It looks like it's probably from the 70s or the 80s.
It looks 70s.
Yeah.
So we'll see.
I think it's a lid it's self shaped on.
And the final item for today.
And the pièce de résistance, which Adam hasn't seen for me, is these are the voyages 1966
to 1996, a three dimensional Star Trek album by Charles Kurtz.
Does that mean that every page is a lenticular on it?
Like the front cover?
Oh, no, that's the only lenticular.
It is the original enterprise going into warp.
I love it.
Anyway, it's great.
There's not that many pages.
It's like you've got the original series.
Yeah, it is pop up.
Original series, there's a little folder with the main characters and there's some little
spinny disks and you can learn about Gorn and Romulan, Klingon, before they got the
forehead that we don't talk about and Tribbles, which are my favorite Star Trek species, I
think.
So, yeah, so there's original series.
It's all big pop up.
It's a lovely, lovely book.
And then there's a bit on Genesis and a bit on TMG and the pop up cube.
Yeah, it's cool, isn't it?
And then you've got DS 9 at the back.
And then it opens out and you've got a DS 9.
There's a wormhole.
There's the stale ship.
It's brilliant.
I love it.
It's great.
Take some photos of this for the year.
I will do.
Yeah, I was going to feature it later on, but I don't need to now because we've gone through
it.
But it was £7.50, which I suppose for a second hand book is quite expensive.
But I have never seen this before.
I don't know if I will ever see another one.
It's in excellent condition.
None of the pop ups are broken.
The covers in Good Nick apart from the bottom corner that's a bit, you know, niggled because
it's been on a shelf.
But yeah, I thought I'm never going to see another one unless I deliberately go looking.
So £7.50 is fine.
Yeah, it's the amount of books that we've seen.
We've never seen one of these.
No, all the other Star Trek books we've seen.
Yeah, I do have a few Star Trek books now.
Coming up on the show, we've got the next instalment of reportage from
Abergavenny Chronicle journalist Tim Butters in Lightly Used News.
We're going to take it in turns to close our eyes and guess what each other's mystery
Tat in the Box item is.
We've got a 10 minute board game break and it's my choice of publication for Bibliotat
to end the show.
Excellent.
And apologies for the strange noises in the background.
The cat has chosen this opportunity to play with her little ball tower.
We moved the entire sheet of paper you're hiding under out so it will be quiet.
But no, you've managed to find something else to make noise.
She's found the one noisy thing in the living room that she plays with.
Yes, as we're finishing the segment.
Fuck you, cat.
For Lightlyy Used News, we turn to Tim Butters in the Abergavenny Chronicle from Monday
the 3rd of June.
Abergavenny man warns that the Forest of Dean is home to an ancient creature.
An Abergavenny man who is spiked with acid by a psychic called Steve while on an
illegal ball hunt has warned the Forest of Dean is cursed by a half pig half man creature
that is as old as the hills and as twice as mean.
Semi-professional long distance runner Johnny Turnip explained.
After being dosed by a fella we thought was a necromancer but in reality was a tarot card
reader and crystal ball caressor named Steve.
Me and the boys confronted the predatory wizard to ask why he tried to blow our mind with
drugs.
Turnip added, Victoria in particular was livid.
Thanks to the LSD he'd spent the best part of two hours thinking he was a German shepherd
called Prince.
It's a tough blow for a proud man like Tony to take.
And from his stony silence I could deduce he was ready to gouge psychic Steve's eyes out
with a spoon and boil them.
Fortunately as a natural diplomat I managed to keep the frenzied violence at bay by peeling
Turnip's tones better nature and giving the necromancer a chance to explain his feral-like
behaviour before Big Tone battered him like a sausage.
Turnip told the Chronicle, the magic man had hinted at some sort of prophecy involving
three unwise men and a gift of immortality.
As a supernatural investigator I wanted to know more.
Turnip said that after they'd made themselves comfortable on the bean bags situated in psychic
Steve's 'well presented and orderly cabin', the would-be necromancer explained that he
and his sidekick Indiana Jenkins spiked their whiskey to prepare their minds for the unimaginable
and impossible.
He needn't have bothered, revealed Turnip.
It was a waste of acid.
As a supernatural investigator I've seen and done things that would make an average
man eat his own fingers like they were made out of fish.
Same rules apply to Big Tony and Puerto Rico Paul.
There's simply nothing we won't believe.
Turnip revealed that after being called out as a fraud at various seances he'd held in
the village around Monmouthshire, psychic Steve fled to the top of Skirrid Mountain
to study high magic of the fabled wizard known as Earl Elderflower.
Turnip said, apparently this Elderflower's the real deal.
A proper necromancer, like Gandalf or something.
He travels all over the UK acting wise, casting spells and telling people the future.
But for three nights a year you can find him on top of the Skirrid in a tent.
It's probably why they call it the Holy Mountain.
Big Steve went out there one night to fry some sausages with him, or whatever wizards
do together.
And he told Steve that the forest of Dean is home to the world's only half pig, half
man creature.
It's like a werewolf but less cool.
A sort of were-pig.
Elderflower referred to it as the Gruntarunt.
Sounds a bit Nazi for me.
I like HomoTrotter better.
Anyhow, it turns out this man pig beast was once a local from a nearby village and his
name was Dean.
They're going back a good thousand years here, mate.
But story goes, one day this young lad is wandering in the forest on his own looking
for mushrooms or whatever they did in the middle ages to pass the time when he was attacked
by a wild pig.
Dean was savage quite badly by the poor, and most of his left leg and buttocks eaten away
as he tried to crawl for cover.
Nevertheless, he survived the attack and managed to find his way home to his village, only
to die three hours later.
The operation ended there, but a week after he was buried, Dean's grave was dug up and
his corpse had gone missing.
Pretty soon, reports started coming thick and fast about a man who looked like a pig
that was attacking and eating villagers in the moonlight.
The villagers soon realised their friend Dean had transformed by some terrible curse into
a hellish hog who would happily drink the blood and feast on their flesh.
From then on, the expansive nameless woodland just outside the village became known as the
Forest of Dean.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! I didn't even see that coming! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! That's
brilliant!
Turnip added,
For years, the people were familiar with the story, new to the forest. No living creature
would venture there except for the hordes of wild boars, many of which were said to
be sired by Dean in an unnatural union with an old sow he had fallen in love with.
As time ticked on, memories faded, all people died and the stories of how the forest was
named became lost.
The people began to once more wander into its dark depths.
For years the HomoTrotter has laid in a deep slumber because his terrible appetites could
not be assuaged.
But as living things once again began to venture into the forest, Dean slowly awoke and began
eating them.
Fortunately, he's lost his taste for human flesh, but he's developed an insatiable appetite
for sausage dogs.
There's many a dashund who's wandered from his owner's side has met an untimely end in the
forest.
Yet, for the real reason Dean is now a source of interest to men who live and breathe magic,
it's not because he poses a threat to sausage dogs, but because he's an immortal and he
said that those who drink his blood will also be bequeathed with the gift of eternal life.
Turnip explained,
We all got very interested at this point, particularly when psychic Steve said that
Elderflower had also told him about an old man of the forest named Indiana Jenkins who'd
been bitten by the HomoTrotter and not only survived, but thrived for the past 500 years.
The very same Indy who'd helped psychic Steve spike our whiskey because according to a prophecy
long written down, we were the three unwise men who would help end the curse.
Turnip added,
As me, Big Tony and Puerto Rico Paul looked at each other slyly, we began to slowly grin
like three handsome devils.
We were back in business, the hunt was on and me and the boys were going to live forever.
That there be blood!
It's time for Tat in the Box, Tat in the Box, Tat in the Box, Tat in the Box, Tat in the
Box, Tat in the Box, Tat in the Box.
It's time for Tat in the Box.
Is it?
It is.
Right, you have to close your eyes.
Okay, eyes are closed, hands are out.
I will endeavour not to hit the microphone with whatever it is you're about to lay on
me.
You will soon discover this was Tat's I was originally going to use for the Christmas
episode.
Is it wrapped?
Yeah.
And then the reason I was going to use it for the Christmas episode is it was an easy
shape to wrap compared to the other one.
Yeah, in fairness, this is a much easier shape to wrap than...
Maybe we should do a regular thing of wrapping them.
No.
I have a feeling, I have no idea.
Right.
Oh, oh, am I going to break this?
No.
Okay.
Definitely not.
Sorry about the wrapping paper noises.
Adam likes to keep his tat insulated, apparently.
Oh my God, it's so hard to open if you've got eyes closed.
Where's the other end of the paper?
There.
Have you once again used an entire roll of wrapping paper on one thing?
Well, I think that was the bit I had left of that roll.
It's about 2 metres long! ... and it's in a bag
There's your paper back
Oh hang on - the cat's coing to want the paper