Welcome to Closer to Christ through General Conference,
where two friends who love Jesus share our own
approach to studying the most recent General
Conference talks. This is Abby and Amy. Let's
jump into it. Today we're talking about cheering
each other on. This is by Sister J. Annette Dennis.
I know, just saying the title of it, it gets
me all excited and this pumping. She's the first
counselor in the Relief Society General Presidency.
So right from the beginning, I'm going to jump
to the end of this talk just to kind of set the
stage for our discussion today. So Sister Dennis
shared something deeply personal. with all of
us and it helped me to understand why she's so
passionate about this topic and also why she
discussed it so perfectly. She shared this, when
I was in my late 20s I went through a period
of deep depression and during that time it was
as if the reality that God existed was suddenly
gone. My heart went out to her on that. I can't
fully explain the feeling, other than to say
I felt completely lost from the time I was a
young child. I'd always known that my father
in heaven was there and that I could talk to
him. But during that time, I no longer knew if
there was a God. I'd never experienced anything
like that before in my life, and it felt like
my whole foundation was crumbling. As a result,
it was hard for me to attend church. I went,
but it was partly because I was afraid of being
labeled inactive or less faithful, and I was
afraid of becoming someone's assigned project.
What I really needed during that time was to
feel genuine love, understanding, and support
from those around me, not judgment. Some of the
assumptions I was afraid that people would make
about me, I myself had made about other people
when they didn't regularly attend church. That
painful personal experience taught me some valuable
lessons about why we've been commanded not to
judge one another unrighteously. Isn't it cool
how she just opened herself up to like, this
is something that I've learned firsthand for
myself from my personal experience. I'm glad
that you pulled it up from the end of the talk
because it really sets the stage for this important
topic that she's going to. Talk John agree she
followed with the question Are there those among
us who suffer in silence afraid of others to?
To know their hidden struggles because they don't
know what the reaction will be I I myself connected
with his talk on a lot of levels, but particularly
in my 20s I was finishing college I tend to have
more like anxious thoughts than depressive thoughts,
but I was like killing myself with school. I'm
right -handed naturally and my instructors thought
it'd be a good idea for me to do dental hygiene
school left -handed. What? Yeah, it was wild.
Like the personality that I am now, I'd be like,
you know, like, no. Yeah. Why are you stacking
things against me? Yeah. Well, you know, a missing
piece of one of my fingers. And so they felt
that I couldn't do the job of a dental hygienist
right -handed, like naturally. So I'm like, I
can't even hold a pencil with my left hand. You
know, I'm like, I'm a terrible writer. So it
was challenging. So it's already a pretty challenging
program. pretty competitive and then like they
just throw it on me like hey why don't you be
left -handed and my senior year they were like
why don't you pass the processes off right and
left -handed and i was more strong in my personality
at that point i'm like no that's not happening
we'll stick to one set of expectations like everybody
else right so i mean my anxiety it was it was
through the roof and so i i had to go on some
medication at the time and i became really close
with um with some of the gals in the program
because we did carpooling together and you know,
I'm on this medication, they were just like,
you're not yourself. And, and I was like, well,
I'm either on this medication and just kind of
making it through the motions or I'm going to
die of a heart attack. So I picked, I picked
no emotion. I felt like it was a good thing.
So really, you know, keeping the blood pressure
at bay and stuff was, was the important part
and just trying to stay on track with the schooling
program. I didn't want to fall behind in that.
So anyway, you know, This is kind of a lot to
share, but why am I, why am I sharing this? Her
talk made me think like, it's great to have that
discussion and bring it to the forefront because
I would say mental health issues are huge right
now. Like, I don't understand everybody and all,
you know, all of the emotions that they're going
through, but I personally look back on my experience
from 20 years ago and I appreciate that I had
that struggle because I don't know, it helps
me relate a little bit more. Like she said her
normal way, she's like, I can't explain the feelings
that I had. She was struggling with, you know,
faith questions at the time. She can't explain
it, but it does make her empathetic to others
that are going through it. She can at least see
through their eyes. Like she doesn't know exactly
how they're feeling, but you don't have to know
exactly how they're feeling to appreciate that.
That these these struggles exist and when she
brings it up and and she and she mentioned that
she has it then all of a sudden She's just way
more relatable in a situation So anyway, I look
back on that time grateful for friends that were
looking out for me You know, they they wanted
me and my personality back but like for a time
for a period of time I was like I just have to
numb myself to the world and lucky for me I I
wasn't having a faith crisis on top of it. It
was yeah, it was really like just to level out
Um, the, the, the expectations I think I had
for myself and the education field. And like
I said, 20 years later, uh, you know, I've learned
other mechanisms. Like if, if I have stress,
just bite my fingernails off and then the world's
totally fine or just kidding. No, but there are
other things, um, you know, meditation or. I
mean, saying no to something that are above my
capacity or, or giving it to God, you know, earlier
on, I learned a lot about myself and it. It's
given me a perspective as I look at others, you
know, knowing that they maybe have those struggles.
It's so great when they're willing to share that
they're going through a period of struggle so
that you're not just guessing, diagnosing them
like when they bring it up. So anyway, I love
this talk. I'm hoping that a lot of you just
find a lot of comfort knowing, I'm guessing a
majority of us listening to this talk are like,
yeah, I've had my own periods of time and really
could use a cheerleader versus somebody. tearing
me down and saying, why aren't you doing this
or that? Sometimes you just can't. Yeah. Very
good, Abby. Thanks for sharing that. I never
knew that. We are often surprised when others
share something so intimate and personal with
us. I've been grateful when those around me have
shared and allowed me and others in. I've never
once thought, oh, you're struggling with something.
When people have the courage to share the things
that they're struggling with, especially when
they do it with a desire to hold on to the things
that they knew. It's always done something to
strengthen my own testimony. You're right. It's
so hard when you have to guess. You know what
I mean? Yeah, it's hard. You don't know where
something's going on. Yeah. Because it could
be like an issue. Like it could be a doctor in
peace that they're struggling with. But if you
understand that it's a mental component that
they don't have any control over, it really does
help you know. Sometimes you just need to be
there with them. You can ask the Spirit to help
impress you. Am I saying something? Just being
here. It puts another key player into the process.
For sure. Get them the most help they need. I
think Satan rejoices when he thinks that he's
convinced people that they have to hold their
trouble in. to themselves and just suffer in
silence, you know? When we know what challenges
other people are facing, whether it's mental
or physical, like you were talking about, then
we know how to minister and serve better. It's
funny, I was talking to my mom today and we were,
one of our family members is going into the doctor
and we're kind of praying, you know, that it's
not cancer or something else. And she was saying
that, and I said, you know, I'm going to pray
for a correct diagnosis, because I feel like
when you get a correct diagnosis, then you're
not treating things that have nothing to do with
it. Do you know what I'm saying? You could exhaust
yourself, treating yourself or worrying about
the scenarios that it possibly could be. Totally.
I mean, I felt that way with the kids and their
cystic fibrosis diagnosis. Like, no, it's not
awesome to know that your kid has that, but not
knowing why your baby's just like withering away.
You rule out everything else. Yeah. What possibly
could be going on? Like once you have the diagnosis
that you've got a community of people that can
support and surround you. Another thing is you're
exactly saying what's in my heart. heart, like
this family member, they could have just held
that challenge into themselves, you know, doing
a prayer thing and, you know, fasting in the
temple or whatever. They could have been doing
a lot of things individually for themselves,
but the fact that you know that the appointment's
coming up, we don't, we can't choose the outcome.
We can't decide, you know, how this is going
to go. But this family member has allowed the
rest of the family in on this challenge. Then
you can pray together. You can be equally invested
in the outcome. You know, as they're trying to
decide treatments, if they ask your opinion,
you can have, you know, you can have some thoughts
and feelings about that because they have decided
to loop you into the situation. And then, you
know, when things happen that are like positive,
you know, positive test result here, they get
some news, we get to cheer and rejoice with them.
Like their victory is our victory. I agree. When
you let people in, also this... I feel like the
Lord lets us also have a portion of how he feels
for them or what he wants for them. And it just,
it broadens the circle. You know what I mean?
It enlarges the circle. That's what I meant to
say. Absolutely. Until we get better at sharing
these challenges with each other, I think this
talk is a good backdrop for helping us to consider
realistically. Pretty much everyone everywhere
that we encounter has something, some unique
set of challenges that's making their mortal
experience difficult. And so without even knowing
exactly what challenges they're carrying, what
about if we just treat each other as though they
are carrying the biggest burden of their life?
You know, choose to be a cheerleader mortality
because there are plenty of hard things going
on and finding joy in, you know, we can find
joy. and still recognize this is an awfully hard
thing that we're tasked with doing. Absolutely.
So just assume other people are having just as
hard of a time as we are. It just looks different.
Yeah, it's gonna look different. Yeah. And how
can we cheer and uplift them? Mm -hmm. We can't
skip talking about the story that she did open
with. I love this. At the USA Masters Track and
Field National Championship, a competition for
seniors, one of the participants in the 1500
meter event was a... 100 year old, his name was
Orville Rogers. To summarize the sweet story,
this elderly runner named Orville competed in
multiple races where he fell far behind, running
alone long after everyone else had finished.
As he began his final lap of his fifth event,
the silent crowd rose in support, cheering him
across the finish line where his fellow competitors
embraced him. Though he finished last in every
single event, Orville actually broke five world
records in his age group. His efforts showed
remarkable courage and reminded observers not
to judge others, since people often face challenges
unseen and still give their very best. Totally
reminded me of Sister Ruña's talk last time.
Was it Ruña, the blonde? The degree of difficulty?
No. I know who you're. Me too. Now I can't remember
it. Sorry about that. It's okay. Can't be expected
to remember a thing, but what was the feeling
from the talk? It was essentially the degree
of difficulty that the Lord knows what the degree
of difficulty is. Only He knows. That's why He
gets to be the judge. That's why He's the judge.
This talk emphasizes that too. 100%. Yes. Love
that. I'm just picturing like, you know, you
get to heaven and just kind of picture like you've
just stuck your finger in a light socket. That's
how frazzled and you are, you know, bloody knees
and hands from like crawling your way there.
That's how it feels. That's kind of how it feels.
But it's just like, I made it. I'm here. For
sure. All of us really need that sense of support
and encouragement, regardless of our age. Basic
human needs are the fact that we Each need to
know that we are wanted and needed and that our
lives have purpose and meaning no matter our
circumstances or limitations Love it again Cheerleader
rather than not we're each touched to see how
the crowd responded to Orville and it's likely
because it's an example of how the Savior is
always there to cheer us on and How when we follow
the commandment to love and serve others even
as he does we can choose to be cheerleaders in
the lives of others What if our congregations?
our families, we're gathering places where we
each cheered each other on. What if we were fueled
by the love of Christ for one another? I love
that. That's really good. What if we were more
inclined to help others overcome whatever challenges
they were facing? And again, Abby, it just comes
to mind that when we are prayerful, the Spirit
can help us just to discern what's going on.
And maybe we don't get the full picture. I wouldn't
think that we would, but we would have an inclination
to treat them, whoever we're praying about, with
more kindness and more compassion, even if that's
all we did. Yeah. This talk makes me think I
don't even have to pray for a specific person
to help. I can just assume every single person
that I'm rubbing shoulders with on any given
day is carrying something worth My time and attention
to just let them know how awesome they are. Yeah,
I'm proud I am of the good things they're doing
and it's especially awesome to do because Undoubtedly,
I'm gonna need that same encouragement and support
and it's great to know like sometimes you're
lifting up the people that will then turn around
to be your 100 % support and cheerleader in your
deepest time of need. Yes It also reminds me,
Abby, back during COVID, when I first moved here,
we had a Come Follow Me study group. And I loved
it because it was a group where all were welcome,
regardless of whether you studied that week or
not, whatever happened. And we've said this before,
but sometimes you come to share what you had
learned and to fill others cups. And sometimes
you come and you know that you're in the company
of women who... Love the Lord and who love you
and they fill your cup up. You know what I mean?
And so it was a very Give -and -take economy.
Yeah, that's always a great way. Yeah, that's
what we want to see for the Facebook page right
now We're just acknowledging to the Lord, we
heard what you said about having further discussion
and gathering men and women who've studied these
and want to have a discussion about it. So we've
opened the Facebook page. And it's the holidays.
And it's just not taken off, but it's going to.
Yeah, we'll see you in a year, guys. Maybe three
years from now. We'll be like, oh yeah, that's
exactly what we wanted it to be. But we started
it to be like, we heard what you said. We were
trying to pair back on the talks. We were like,
hey, Heavenly Baller. That's a lot of talks to
cover. Do you want us to do less?" And he's like,
just cover them up. And he's like, also, go ahead
and add Facebook discussion page to it. Our capacity
is expanding, Abby. Well, I mean, you could see
how well it's going. There's like four followers.
Just kidding. Thank you for joining us on there.
Join us. We're going to eventually have great
discussions there so that we can build each other
up when we have the capacity and we can just
read other comments to build us up when we don't.
Love it. We need each other. Sister Dennis shares,
divine strength comes from unity, and that is
why Satan is intent on dividing us. Doesn't it
take you off just to realize how good he is at
his job? Yeah. And do you remember in that kind
of a sub branch of that study group, the Enneagram
work that we did? I had COVID during that, but
I remember reading the whole thing about it.
Yeah. It's an interesting, it's like a personality
test. Yep. It's a framework that has nine core
principles. And what I liked is this friend that
was teaching, like this is definitely a worldly,
secular personality test, but because she and
her husband as members of the Church of Jesus
Christ of Latter -day Saints had done some studying
with it, like this is his livelihood particularly,
like this is, you know, something he's really
good at. He was able to... point us to Christ
in the study of this because he was like these
nine core principles are divine attributes of
Jesus Christ. And so we all exhibit those characteristics
in one way or another. They're deep rooted motivations
rather than just like a surface trait that somebody
would have. And so you're not putting people
in boxes as you're studying the Enneagram being
like, oh, you're this characteristic or this
of the nine, but it helps us understand why.
You know why we do the things that we do And
you know, why does this matter the Enneagram
it highlights our strengths But then because
we can pick up on our strengths It'll point out
what our blind spots can typically be it will
show us a path to grow because that's a that's
a good thing It's you know, not be like, oh,
I've got this trade -out. It's a superpower Well,
every trait can be your downfall if if you're
not aware of it and and where you know where
the weaknesses lie Anyway We don't need to get
into this, but it really helps you understand
your relationships, how those things work, and
it helps you personally develop in areas. You
can see blind spots. You can be pointed to blind
spots that you can focus on knowing that as you're
working on that, that you're working on another
Christlike attribute. That's how I see it. Love
that. That's so great. So it's in a practical,
insightful way. It's surprisingly transformative.
And I need to refresh your course on it. Like,
I'm certainly not the expert to be talking about
it, but I'm going to spell it because it doesn't
sound quite like it is. It's E -N -N -E -A -G
-R -A -M. And there's usually like a free test.
You take a few questions, you know, like probably
30 questions. And it kind of points to this,
but it gives you... Anyway, I would suggest you
kind of look at it in the form of Christ -like
attributes that you have, that you can recognize,
and that you can work on. But what I liked about
it is that you're realizing that everybody has
Christ -like characteristics. Everybody has a
piece of Him in them. And so, you know, you can
look at people. The whole point of this was that
I can look at people. and say, oh, that's the
characteristic that's coming out. I can see that
piece of Christ in them. And if you're having
a challenge with getting along with somebody
that you recognize your trait doesn't supersede
theirs, they all have their powers and they're
all you know, needed, they're all needed. Yes,
it's so good to have people, you know, you get
this number, you're like, you're a nine, you're
an eight, you're the peacemaker, you're the fixer,
whatever, whatever the list is. All of them have
a purpose and are needed. And it was a good reminder
to me that, especially people that you're having
a hard time getting along with. that they have
a piece of Christ in them too. 100%. Love that
Abby. Yeah, they can see me through my faults,
I can see them through theirs, and we can recognize
that all of our uniqueness is a great thing.
Yep. That's so good. You're going to hear my
dogs barking because we had... a bear in a mountain
lion on the hill behind us. It's so warm. It's
like, are they even sleeping? No. So please excuse
my dogs, but they're protecting us. Let's look
at the list of challenges that some are struggling
with that make it hard to attend church. So some
struggle with questions of faith, anxiety, depression.
It could be someone from a different country
or race or someone with different life experiences
or maybe their way of seeing things who might
feel like they don't fit the mold. It could even
be a sleep deprived and emotionally stretched
parents, I've heard that a couple times in the
talks that we're listening to, of babies and
young children or someone who is single in a
congregation full of couples and families. It
could also be someone mustering the courage to
return after years of being away or someone with
a nagging feeling that they just don't measure
up and will never belong. Don't you think it's
interesting because you're the the last talk
you you compile that list of the people that
the safe reach right? Nobody was excluded like
who's not one or multiple of those right? I'm
like, oh, yeah, I've been sleep deprived. Oh,
yeah, this has happened. That's happened What
do all these examples of people need more than
they need our judgment? They need our cheerleading
skills What can we do to help them in their journey
rather than? Pull them down further Good self
-reflection. Yeah, right President Russell M
Nelson said if a young if a couple in your ward
gets divorced or a missionary returns home early
or a teenager doubts His testimony they don't
need your judgment They need to experience the
pure love of Jesus Christ reflected in your words
and actions We grow into our divine heritage
as we fine -tune the ability to see others like
our Savior does and helps others recognize this
super strengths that we when we see them or or
feel them for ourselves. I mean, that's, I kind
of went on a tangent on the enneagram, but I
really became passionate about it because it's,
it's something more than anything else that I've
ever done that helped me recognize it's Christ
-like attributes I'm trying to grow and develop.
And if it's when I see those in other people,
I can look past the, you know, surface things
that seem to bother me. True. I don't need them
to change. It's not like my opinion of them being
annoying matters. They're probably like, she's
annoying too. Give me back. I'm just saying we
all have these divine attributes and they're
all important. And when you just assume everybody,
when you're working with that goal to become
more Christ -like, if they're giving you that
same courtesy, it's a little more peaceful of
a world, isn't it? Yes. Absolutely. I would say
this talk gave me a lot to stop and think about.
For sure. She did a really good job, didn't she?
Yeah. So, this life experience is about relationships
and connection. The plan of happiness centers
around families. For those who aren't blessed
with a strong family unit or love, Far from them,
the church family becomes even more vital. Our
experience at church is meant to provide vital
connections with the Lord and also with each
other that are so needed for our spiritual and
emotional well -being. Inherent in the covenants
we make with God, beginning with baptism is our
responsibility to love and care for each other
as members of the family of God, members of the
body of Christ, and not just to check off a box
on a list of things that we're expected to do.
The Savior said, by this shall all men know that
ye are made disciples if ye have loved one to
another. Again, not an obligation or a checkbox,
but just truly seeing outside of ourselves and
recognizing the needs of another and doing what
we can to help ease those burdens. That's how
we show that we're a disciple of Jesus Christ
in demonstrating that. Are we going to get it
perfect every time? No, no not likely but the
words of a beloved children's hymn came to my
mind when I was studying this talk I'm trying
to be like Jesus. I'm following in his ways I'm
trying to love as he did and all that I do and
say at times I am tempted to make a wrong choice
But I try to listen as a still small voice whispers
love one another as Jesus loves you try to show
kindness and all that you do Be gentle and loving
indeed in these and in thought for these are
the things Jesus taught I love this reminder
that it's not about getting it perfect, it's
about trying and then relying on a strength beyond
your own to succeed. Absolutely, Abby. President
Nelson added this, read about the Savior doing
those things in his life, but actually seeking
opportunities to do as he did. It's great when
we start this process in our own homes, in our
own valleys, and then we can extend that into
our church congregations. But the ultimate goal
of Christlike treatment of our sisters and brothers
of all other faiths, all over the world, or no
faith at all. Sister Dennis said this, it includes
our brothers and sisters from other countries
and cultures as well as those of different political
persuasions. We're all part of the family of
God and he loves all his children. He desires
that his children love him and also one another.
The Savior's life was an example of loving, gathering,
and lifting even those whose society had judged
as outcasts and unclean. I think he made a specific
point to reach out to Pete. you know, people
that society had had deemed that way. Right.
So he's basically saying, I'm reaching to these.
So we're on this far extreme of the spectrum.
You have to fall somewhere on this side of it.
Yeah, right. Only the Lord fully knows the actual
level of difficulty. Here we are at the level
of difficulty again with each of us is running
our race of life. So he knows the burdens, the
challenges, the obstacles we face. that cannot
be seen by anyone else. Only he fully understands
the life -changing wounds and trauma that some
of us may have experienced in the past that are
still affecting us today in the present. But
what if each day we had a prayer in our hearts
to see those around us as he does and be impressed
with opportunities to serve as he would? How
much happier would we be in our own lives if
we tried harder to be the cheerleader instead
of the wrecking crew? So good. Yeah, I know.
It's hard to love others. when we don't love
ourselves. She made this true statement. She
said, often we even judge ourselves harshly,
thinking we should be much further ahead on the
track. Only the Lord fully knows our individual
limitations and capacity, and because of that,
He is the only one fully qualified to judge our
performance. If you haven't done this in a while,
we'd invite you to ask your heavenly father how
he feels about you. Take a quiet moment just
to ask him how much you're loved. Our savior
said, in as much as you have done it unto one
of the least of these, you have done it unto
me. And, you know, that's the good and the bad
things we do to each other. And it's the good
and the bad things we say to ourselves. I love
that part when she said that, when you've done
unto me, that's the good and the bad. Yeah. I
just thought of that more that day, you know,
and I was like, wow. That hit me. Yes. Thank
you for saying it that way. She says cool little
lines that like, she's got a way with this. I've
still thinking about talks that she's done multiple
conferences ago. She has that kind of impact
on me. I agree. Just really, I think she's powerful
because that stood out to me in this passing,
but I know that if I go back to this talk a couple
months from now, something else will just be
just as impactful. I love that. Sometimes we're
the cheerleader and sometimes we need the cheerleader
like we talked about before. Remember that the
Savior is the great judge of the race of life
and the only one who fully understands the level
of difficulty with which you are running or walking
or shuffling. Shuffling. He will take into account,
right? I'm suffering right now from a back injury,
so it's easy to see the shuffle of life. That
you're not going as fast as you would like to
be going, right? He will take into account your
limitations, your capacity, your life experiences
and the hidden burdens that you carry, as well
as the desires of your heart. Please don't lose
hope. Please keep going. Please stay. You do
belong. The Lord needs you and we need you. It's
a new year. People love new beginnings. And if
you recognize this is your time to try to be
like Jesus and join the cheer squad, there is
a spot reserved just for you. Who else wanted
to be a cheerleader their whole life and hasn't
been on a team? This is your chance. 2026, is
that what year it is? 2026 is your year. Let's
close with her sweet testimony. Wherever you
live in the world, no matter how remote it may
be, please always remember that your Father in
heaven and your Savior know you completely and
love you perfectly. You are never forgotten to
them. They want to bring you home. Keep your
eye on the Savior. He is your iron rod. Don't
let go of Him. I testify that He lives and you
can trust Him. I also testify that He is cheering
you on. May we all follow the Savior's example
and cheer each other on is my prayer in the name
of Jesus Christ. Amen. Amen. We hope your new
year is filled with big ambitions and opportunities
to come closer to Christ. We'd also love to hear
about you, about a time that someone has been
a cheerleader in your life. Join us on Facebook
and tell us about it. We'll see you soon. Have
a good one. See you next time.