WEBVTT 00:00:02.039 --> 00:00:04.379 Welcome to Closer to Christ through General Conference, 00:00:04.580 --> 00:00:06.559 where two friends who love Jesus share our own 00:00:06.559 --> 00:00:08.240 approach to studying the most recent General 00:00:08.240 --> 00:00:11.359 Conference talks. This is Abby and Amy. Let's 00:00:11.359 --> 00:00:31.920 jump into it. Today we get to discuss the Family 00:00:31.920 --> 00:00:34.740 Proclamation, Words from God, by Elder Ronald 00:00:34.740 --> 00:00:36.439 E. Rasband, Cormorant of the Twelve Apostles. 00:00:36.700 --> 00:00:39.619 This General Conference of October 2025 marks 00:00:39.619 --> 00:00:41.920 the 30th anniversary of the announcement of the 00:00:41.920 --> 00:00:43.679 Family Proclamation to the world. Can you believe 00:00:43.679 --> 00:00:47.060 that? No, Abby. Life is going by way too fast 00:00:47.060 --> 00:00:50.140 for my good. By divine design, this proclamation 00:00:50.140 --> 00:00:52.539 with its revelatory words was created to maintain 00:00:52.539 --> 00:00:54.679 and strengthen the family as the fundamental 00:00:54.679 --> 00:00:58.240 unit of society. Elder Rasband likes words. I 00:00:58.240 --> 00:01:01.060 noticed he used divine design, which is the title 00:01:01.060 --> 00:01:04.099 of a talk he's given and led by design, is a 00:01:04.099 --> 00:01:07.180 book he authored. In this talk, he says, remember, 00:01:07.280 --> 00:01:09.200 brothers and sisters, as I said in a previous 00:01:09.200 --> 00:01:11.879 general conference from this very pulpit, words 00:01:11.879 --> 00:01:14.560 matter. I remember that. And then it sparks all 00:01:14.560 --> 00:01:16.079 the things we thought about when he talked about 00:01:16.079 --> 00:01:19.000 that whole talk. Then he gives us a great backstory 00:01:19.000 --> 00:01:21.819 of how the family proclamation to the world came 00:01:21.819 --> 00:01:26.739 about. From here, he goes. And he says, we'll 00:01:26.739 --> 00:01:29.299 call it the family proclamation. What did you 00:01:29.299 --> 00:01:31.260 find most interesting about the backstory, Amy? 00:01:31.840 --> 00:01:34.060 I think it's funny that you said the whole 30 00:01:34.060 --> 00:01:36.980 -year thing. I agree with that. I love that he 00:01:36.980 --> 00:01:39.340 spoke about this. It was my very first Relief 00:01:39.340 --> 00:01:42.459 Society general meeting, my first semester at 00:01:42.459 --> 00:01:45.920 college. I can't believe it was 30 years ago. 00:01:46.040 --> 00:01:48.519 But yeah, I remember sitting there with my roommates 00:01:48.519 --> 00:01:51.439 thinking this was a monumental occasion, although 00:01:51.439 --> 00:01:54.760 I wasn't sure why yet. Now looking back, I see 00:01:54.760 --> 00:01:57.200 it was bigger than I knew at the time and that 00:01:57.200 --> 00:01:59.879 the Spirit was impressing on my heart and my 00:01:59.879 --> 00:02:02.120 mind the importance of this proclamation on the 00:02:02.120 --> 00:02:04.799 family. Is it fair to say when he said that, 00:02:04.840 --> 00:02:06.920 we kind of all flashed back to like when we heard, 00:02:07.060 --> 00:02:09.599 kind of first thought of it and just can't believe 00:02:09.599 --> 00:02:12.240 the life we've all lived in that time? Yes, absolutely. 00:02:13.879 --> 00:02:17.680 And I also, Abby, I really love that as far as 00:02:17.680 --> 00:02:19.960 this backstory goes, that it all started with 00:02:19.960 --> 00:02:22.659 a question and a prayer, much like any revelation 00:02:22.659 --> 00:02:26.740 comes. He says in 1994, a year before the proclamation 00:02:26.740 --> 00:02:28.800 was presented, the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles 00:02:28.800 --> 00:02:31.719 discussed how society and governments were pulling 00:02:31.719 --> 00:02:34.780 away from God's laws of family, marriage, and 00:02:34.780 --> 00:02:37.159 gender. 30 years ago. I know! What they thought 00:02:37.159 --> 00:02:39.919 a pulling away looked like is way different than... 00:02:40.460 --> 00:02:42.840 what we're experiencing now. Exactly, Abby. That 00:02:42.840 --> 00:02:45.979 is exactly what I felt and thought. Then Elder 00:02:45.979 --> 00:02:49.740 Nelson says, we could see it all coming. Let's 00:02:49.740 --> 00:02:51.680 take a minute again to think on that. Decades 00:02:51.680 --> 00:02:54.599 before, things changed drastically. We had prophets 00:02:54.599 --> 00:02:57.319 and seers, right? They see. Seek revelation, 00:02:57.699 --> 00:03:01.060 revelators, on behalf of the family. Abby, what 00:03:01.060 --> 00:03:03.919 do you have? I really appreciated the way it 00:03:03.919 --> 00:03:06.960 came together as a quorum. Of the 12 apostles. 00:03:07.139 --> 00:03:11.300 They all have their stem signature to say, we 00:03:11.300 --> 00:03:13.340 all decree this together. I like that. We know 00:03:13.340 --> 00:03:15.740 this came from God and the 12 determined, you 00:03:15.740 --> 00:03:18.159 know, they prepare a document, make it an official 00:03:18.159 --> 00:03:21.300 proclamation. And it would, you know, it would 00:03:21.300 --> 00:03:23.479 be a summary of the church's position on the 00:03:23.479 --> 00:03:27.129 family. During that year. These apostles, seers, 00:03:27.129 --> 00:03:29.490 called of God, prepared a declaration about the 00:03:29.490 --> 00:03:32.030 family. President Dallin H. Oaks recalled they 00:03:32.030 --> 00:03:34.050 prayerfully turned to the Lord for what they 00:03:34.050 --> 00:03:36.990 should say and how they should say it. They presented 00:03:36.990 --> 00:03:39.210 it to the first presidency, President Howard 00:03:39.210 --> 00:03:44.770 W. Hunter. So again, every word was well thought. 00:03:45.449 --> 00:03:48.030 Not like, oh, let's tweak that. Now, 30 years 00:03:48.030 --> 00:03:50.430 later, let's go, let's change that, make it a 00:03:50.430 --> 00:03:53.389 little bit more. Palatable. It's God's word. 00:03:53.490 --> 00:03:56.150 For sure. Did we hear God correctly? This is 00:03:56.150 --> 00:03:59.830 how he said to say it. We reaffirm it. So yeah, 00:03:59.870 --> 00:04:03.090 he did hand it over to Howard W. Hunter, President 00:04:03.090 --> 00:04:04.789 Hinckley, and I think it was President Monson, 00:04:04.789 --> 00:04:07.830 right? And then President Hunter passed away 00:04:07.830 --> 00:04:11.629 before they gave it. I love also that the Quorum 00:04:11.629 --> 00:04:14.830 of the Twelve counseled with the women and also 00:04:14.830 --> 00:04:17.550 that President Hinckley read it first to the 00:04:17.550 --> 00:04:21.000 women of the church. Elder Rasband says, days 00:04:21.000 --> 00:04:23.959 before the September 23rd General Relief Society 00:04:23.959 --> 00:04:27.019 meeting that preceded General Conference, President 00:04:27.019 --> 00:04:29.600 Hinckley and his counselors met in council with 00:04:29.600 --> 00:04:32.680 the Relief Society General Presidency. The sisters, 00:04:32.839 --> 00:04:35.459 like the apostles, had also been weighing concerns 00:04:35.459 --> 00:04:38.120 about women and families. And I also love it 00:04:38.120 --> 00:04:40.160 because all of them had prepared messages about 00:04:40.160 --> 00:04:43.360 the family for that meeting. Was this women's 00:04:43.360 --> 00:04:44.980 meeting the right setting to make the decision? 00:04:45.660 --> 00:04:49.100 the decisive declaration about the family. This 00:04:49.100 --> 00:04:53.300 is what then Relief Society General President 00:04:53.300 --> 00:04:56.259 Elaine Jacks said. We didn't know what the proclamation 00:04:56.259 --> 00:04:59.019 on the family was at that time. We could tell 00:04:59.019 --> 00:05:02.920 by the title, but we felt anything on the family 00:05:02.920 --> 00:05:06.279 would be a positive thing. I felt very positive 00:05:06.279 --> 00:05:07.939 that we had members of the Quorum of the Twelve 00:05:07.939 --> 00:05:12.230 that were receiving revelation. Like as in, hey, 00:05:12.290 --> 00:05:13.709 can we present this at your meeting? And they 00:05:13.709 --> 00:05:15.569 really could be like, well, no, save it for a 00:05:15.569 --> 00:05:18.550 different time. It feels good. It's about the 00:05:18.550 --> 00:05:21.589 family. Come on in, boys. I remember what stage 00:05:21.589 --> 00:05:23.370 of life I was in when the family proclamation 00:05:23.370 --> 00:05:26.329 was given. Like what you were saying, right? 00:05:26.490 --> 00:05:29.290 We all kind of remember what we were doing. How 00:05:29.290 --> 00:05:30.829 old were you or what were you doing at that time, 00:05:30.870 --> 00:05:34.129 Abby? Am I four years younger than you? Possibly. 00:05:34.250 --> 00:05:39.259 How old are you? 48. I'll be 49. Six years different. 00:05:39.459 --> 00:05:43.680 Yeah, just young women's. Okay. But yeah, like 00:05:43.680 --> 00:05:46.800 definitely like a phase of my life where, so 00:05:46.800 --> 00:05:49.180 don't think I was going to the young women's 00:05:49.180 --> 00:05:52.100 meeting. I think my first rehash of it was maybe 00:05:52.100 --> 00:05:54.240 in a Relief Society lesson presenting on the 00:05:54.240 --> 00:05:55.759 family proclamation and then looking back and 00:05:55.759 --> 00:05:57.339 being like, oh, this is five years old and whatever. 00:05:57.579 --> 00:05:59.980 For sure. Kind of a little different phase of 00:05:59.980 --> 00:06:03.279 my life. I love it. The Relief Society meeting 00:06:03.279 --> 00:06:07.079 that Saturday. That particular Saturday was historic. 00:06:07.259 --> 00:06:09.139 President Hinckley introduced the family proclamation 00:06:09.139 --> 00:06:12.319 with these important words. With so much of sophistry 00:06:12.319 --> 00:06:15.680 that it passed off as truth, with so much of 00:06:15.680 --> 00:06:17.720 deception concerning standards and values, with 00:06:17.720 --> 00:06:20.259 so much of allurement and enticement to take 00:06:20.259 --> 00:06:22.740 on the slow stain of the world, we have felt 00:06:22.740 --> 00:06:25.779 to warn and forewarn of standards, doctrines, 00:06:25.800 --> 00:06:28.060 and practices relative to the family, which the 00:06:28.060 --> 00:06:30.259 prophets, seers, and revelators of this church 00:06:30.259 --> 00:06:32.379 have repeatedly stated throughout its history. 00:06:33.290 --> 00:06:35.209 I remember him saying those words and I was like, 00:06:35.269 --> 00:06:38.689 wow, like he's setting the record straight here. 00:06:40.009 --> 00:06:43.050 Elder Rasband speaks to each one of us when he 00:06:43.050 --> 00:06:46.589 says, when presented, the proclamation did not 00:06:46.589 --> 00:06:48.610 align with the views of many in the world, not 00:06:48.610 --> 00:06:51.819 then and not now. There are those who take issue 00:06:51.819 --> 00:06:53.959 with the Declaration of Family, Marriage, and 00:06:53.959 --> 00:06:57.199 Gender. Some suggest a church pull it back, revise, 00:06:57.339 --> 00:06:59.360 or even set the proclamation aside. Like you 00:06:59.360 --> 00:07:01.500 were saying, Abby, like it's 30 years later. 00:07:01.560 --> 00:07:03.399 Maybe we could revise it or whatever. It's like, 00:07:03.399 --> 00:07:05.819 no. 30 years ago, they saw where we would be 00:07:05.819 --> 00:07:08.600 now, and it still is valid. The proclamation 00:07:08.600 --> 00:07:10.939 on the family is, as President Hinckley stated, 00:07:11.139 --> 00:07:13.740 doctrine, my dear brother and sisters. The principles 00:07:13.740 --> 00:07:16.339 are not out of step, but perfectly in step with 00:07:16.339 --> 00:07:19.319 the ways of the Lord and his covenant path. The 00:07:19.319 --> 00:07:21.139 teachings of the proclamation were revealed by 00:07:21.139 --> 00:07:23.920 our Lord Jesus Christ to his apostles then and 00:07:23.920 --> 00:07:26.660 now. This is his church. He has established the 00:07:26.660 --> 00:07:28.660 truths by which we live. So he's essentially 00:07:28.660 --> 00:07:35.080 saying, it's as true now as it was then. For 00:07:35.080 --> 00:07:37.220 those of us who feel this may not apply to us, 00:07:37.279 --> 00:07:39.399 some of us may reflect on the proclamation and 00:07:39.399 --> 00:07:41.939 say, this just isn't working for me. It seems 00:07:41.939 --> 00:07:44.759 insensitive. I know every time, like we're in 00:07:44.759 --> 00:07:46.339 primary and there's a song that's called The 00:07:46.339 --> 00:07:49.480 Families of God and it lines out kind of, you 00:07:49.480 --> 00:07:51.139 know, the mother's duties and the father's duties 00:07:51.139 --> 00:07:53.699 as it is in the proclamation. And you see a lot 00:07:53.699 --> 00:07:56.339 of choristers like, we have a lot of kids in 00:07:56.339 --> 00:07:59.500 our primary and that just doesn't look the same. 00:07:59.579 --> 00:08:01.639 Like it kind of has a cookie cutter feel to it 00:08:01.639 --> 00:08:04.189 or whatever, let's say. And I'm always like, 00:08:04.310 --> 00:08:09.670 yes, that's true. But it's always important to 00:08:09.670 --> 00:08:12.189 point out to kids that these roles exist because 00:08:12.189 --> 00:08:15.470 they're divine roles that come with us. Not just 00:08:15.470 --> 00:08:16.910 because we want to make you feel bad that you 00:08:16.910 --> 00:08:18.670 don't have it, that we want you to feel like 00:08:18.670 --> 00:08:20.870 he made a plan for you to have those awesome 00:08:20.870 --> 00:08:22.449 things. And whether you're experiencing them 00:08:22.449 --> 00:08:24.829 right in that moment, mom passed away, super 00:08:24.829 --> 00:08:27.250 unfortunate. Who's stepping up and filling those 00:08:27.250 --> 00:08:30.069 roles? Who's nurturing you? Who's providing and 00:08:30.069 --> 00:08:33.710 protecting for you? So we teach the ideal so 00:08:33.710 --> 00:08:36.830 that they can know what the plan father had for 00:08:36.830 --> 00:08:39.230 them and then see who's entering their lives 00:08:39.230 --> 00:08:42.049 that are filling those roles. You're crazy if 00:08:42.049 --> 00:08:43.929 you think that they said this to hurt people's 00:08:43.929 --> 00:08:45.690 feelings and that they came from perfect life 00:08:45.690 --> 00:08:47.169 experiences themselves. We've already talked 00:08:47.169 --> 00:08:49.029 about a prophet. He was not raised with a father. 00:08:50.090 --> 00:08:52.649 Do we just ignore the paragraph that talks about? 00:08:53.039 --> 00:08:54.720 Who's going to be there to protect and provide? 00:08:54.799 --> 00:08:56.379 Well, who did that in his family? His mom certainly 00:08:56.379 --> 00:08:58.360 stepped up to play. She took on both roles. Was 00:08:58.360 --> 00:09:01.059 that easy? No. Did it cause some issues for her? 00:09:01.100 --> 00:09:03.120 Yes. Grandparents stepped in. I'm sure there 00:09:03.120 --> 00:09:07.220 were a myriad of men that felt it their duty 00:09:07.220 --> 00:09:11.019 to carry on for President Oaks in a way that 00:09:11.019 --> 00:09:13.480 his dad would have appreciated. Very good point. 00:09:13.480 --> 00:09:16.059 And I also know that his dad still did perform 00:09:16.059 --> 00:09:18.080 some of those duties on the other side of the 00:09:18.080 --> 00:09:20.600 veil for him. Yeah, that's a good point. In a 00:09:20.600 --> 00:09:22.080 tender way, kind of brings that up occasionally. 00:09:22.950 --> 00:09:24.929 So what people might say, this isn't working 00:09:24.929 --> 00:09:27.129 for me and it seems insensitive. My family doesn't 00:09:27.129 --> 00:09:30.889 look like that. I don't fit. And it's fair to 00:09:30.889 --> 00:09:33.710 say those things. But for those with these concerns, 00:09:33.830 --> 00:09:36.070 know this. You are a child of heavenly parents, 00:09:36.129 --> 00:09:38.029 part of your heavenly father's family. No one 00:09:38.029 --> 00:09:40.129 knows you better or cares more deeply about you 00:09:40.129 --> 00:09:42.149 than he does. Turn to him. Pour out your heart 00:09:42.149 --> 00:09:45.629 to him. Trust him and his promises. Know this. 00:09:45.789 --> 00:09:49.049 You have family and your savior, Jesus Christ, 00:09:49.110 --> 00:09:53.480 who loves you. Lastly, all of the Lord's apostles 00:09:53.480 --> 00:09:56.460 love you dearly. We pray for you. You know that 00:09:56.460 --> 00:09:59.759 they do. Seek the Lord's guidance for you. Stay 00:09:59.759 --> 00:10:02.279 with us. You live in challenging times when the 00:10:02.279 --> 00:10:04.379 adversary seeks to make you his. Do not be drawn 00:10:04.379 --> 00:10:07.059 off. And if you are, come back. Our arms reached 00:10:07.059 --> 00:10:09.919 out to you, as will those of others who love 00:10:09.919 --> 00:10:13.139 you. I love that you say that, Abby, that, you 00:10:13.139 --> 00:10:16.639 know, we know that they pray for us. I love that 00:10:16.639 --> 00:10:20.409 he's saying that, piggybacking on telling the 00:10:20.409 --> 00:10:23.450 story about how the family proclamation came 00:10:23.450 --> 00:10:26.610 about, they were praying for us. They were asking, 00:10:26.870 --> 00:10:29.690 petitioning the Lord, what do they need as far 00:10:29.690 --> 00:10:32.009 as guidance goes for these next, you know, the 00:10:32.009 --> 00:10:34.529 next years until the Savior comes again. You 00:10:34.529 --> 00:10:36.809 know what I mean? So there's no doubt that they 00:10:36.809 --> 00:10:39.250 foresaw Satan attacking the family as the best 00:10:39.250 --> 00:10:43.309 way to erode our covenants, stall our progression. 00:10:44.159 --> 00:10:46.019 and try to turn us from the divine truths that 00:10:46.019 --> 00:10:48.259 we know about being children of God. Totally. 00:10:48.539 --> 00:10:50.919 I like that point, Abby. So do you remember right 00:10:50.919 --> 00:10:53.039 before conference, there was a conversation on 00:10:53.039 --> 00:10:55.679 a group that we had. One of our friends asked 00:10:55.679 --> 00:11:00.019 a question about like, you know, She kind of 00:11:00.019 --> 00:11:02.279 essentially said, where's the guarantee in the 00:11:02.279 --> 00:11:04.899 church that if we do quote all the things we're 00:11:04.899 --> 00:11:07.919 supposed to, right? And my brain wasn't really 00:11:07.919 --> 00:11:10.519 working well that week. It was just a fog week. 00:11:10.659 --> 00:11:13.580 And so I read all the comments of all these wonderful 00:11:13.580 --> 00:11:15.580 ladies who have strong testimonies of the Savior 00:11:15.580 --> 00:11:18.059 and of the gospel of Jesus Christ. And I loved 00:11:18.059 --> 00:11:20.659 every single thing that they said. I couldn't 00:11:20.659 --> 00:11:25.399 put my thoughts into words. I just couldn't do 00:11:25.399 --> 00:11:28.759 it at the time. And I loved it. Are you talking 00:11:28.759 --> 00:11:30.799 about the question where she was like, how do 00:11:30.799 --> 00:11:33.220 you know that you get a guarantee? Like all the 00:11:33.220 --> 00:11:36.299 things that we're supposed to do. That, you know, 00:11:36.320 --> 00:11:37.700 our kids will go on missions, marry in the temple, 00:11:37.860 --> 00:11:40.460 have a strong testimony of Jesus Christ. All 00:11:40.460 --> 00:11:42.340 those things. Yeah. Like I'm doing everything 00:11:42.340 --> 00:11:44.789 right so that. So where's my guarantee? I want 00:11:44.789 --> 00:11:46.789 the guarantee that these A, B, and C are going 00:11:46.789 --> 00:11:50.370 to happen. Yeah. And like I said, I loved reading 00:11:50.370 --> 00:11:52.590 everyone's testimony on that. And I wished I 00:11:52.590 --> 00:11:55.129 could chime in, but I just couldn't bring it 00:11:55.129 --> 00:11:57.909 together. And as I sat at conference and listened 00:11:57.909 --> 00:11:59.710 to these words, I was like, that would be my 00:11:59.710 --> 00:12:02.370 answer. It's happiness in life is most likely 00:12:02.370 --> 00:12:04.629 to be achieved when founded upon the teachings 00:12:04.629 --> 00:12:08.360 of Jesus Christ. Most likely, right? There's 00:12:08.360 --> 00:12:11.320 no guarantee. We don't do all the things so that 00:12:11.320 --> 00:12:13.779 there is a guarantee that all will end up the 00:12:13.779 --> 00:12:16.419 way, quote, it's supposed to. And if I think 00:12:16.419 --> 00:12:18.159 about it, if I'm being honest, that kind of sounds 00:12:18.159 --> 00:12:20.779 closer to Satan's plan, meaning a guarantee. 00:12:21.460 --> 00:12:23.320 When you have guarantee, that means you have 00:12:23.320 --> 00:12:25.460 control, and we don't control other people's 00:12:25.460 --> 00:12:28.220 agency, only our own. Did somebody in that thread, 00:12:28.379 --> 00:12:31.210 I'm pretty sure Jet said something like... He's 00:12:31.210 --> 00:12:33.889 not a dispensing machine. Yeah, she did say that. 00:12:33.950 --> 00:12:37.509 And if the blessing for choosing the right is 00:12:37.509 --> 00:12:39.950 immediate, then there's really no time to... 00:12:39.950 --> 00:12:44.769 To learn the lesson. To learn from it. Which 00:12:44.769 --> 00:12:46.970 we've talked about this before, the same thing. 00:12:46.990 --> 00:12:48.830 Sometimes you make bad decisions and the consequence 00:12:48.830 --> 00:12:50.789 doesn't follow immediately. Sometimes it takes 00:12:50.789 --> 00:12:53.070 years. If it was so immediate that you wouldn't... 00:12:54.279 --> 00:12:56.220 you really wouldn't be having agency. It's like, 00:12:56.279 --> 00:12:58.419 oh, hey, that didn't. There are some things that 00:12:58.419 --> 00:13:00.080 are immediate. A kid touches a hot stove. They 00:13:00.080 --> 00:13:01.539 don't touch the hot stove immediately after. 00:13:01.620 --> 00:13:04.259 It burned them. Something like adult decisions. 00:13:04.779 --> 00:13:06.539 Sometimes you're like, oh, that was a great decision. 00:13:06.639 --> 00:13:08.259 I'm so glad I made that decision. And it's not 00:13:08.259 --> 00:13:09.919 till years later. You're like, oh, that was contrary 00:13:09.919 --> 00:13:12.639 to the word of God. And I can see how that has 00:13:12.639 --> 00:13:15.720 affected, you know, my life in whatever way. 00:13:15.820 --> 00:13:18.379 Yeah. So anyway, I remember there were a lot 00:13:18.379 --> 00:13:20.240 of great comments on that. And I've thought about 00:13:20.240 --> 00:13:27.549 it since. I'm like. It's amazing to think he's 00:13:27.549 --> 00:13:29.750 made the promise. Obedience to his commandments 00:13:29.750 --> 00:13:32.070 has a certain set of promises. Whenever those 00:13:32.070 --> 00:13:34.750 manifest themselves, sometimes they're immediate, 00:13:34.870 --> 00:13:37.950 sometimes they're longer in coming, I trust that 00:13:37.950 --> 00:13:39.690 the timing will be right whenever he decides 00:13:39.690 --> 00:13:45.210 for that to be. That's great, Abby. Elder Rasband 00:13:45.210 --> 00:13:48.850 asked us, what are the teachings of Jesus Christ? 00:13:49.340 --> 00:13:52.600 Again, in the proclamation, faith, prayer, repentance, 00:13:52.799 --> 00:13:54.740 forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, 00:13:54.879 --> 00:13:57.659 and wholesome recreational activities. Whose 00:13:57.659 --> 00:13:59.659 life will not be better by applying these key 00:13:59.659 --> 00:14:02.419 principles? What if the children don't turn out 00:14:02.419 --> 00:14:04.120 cookie cutter perfect like you were hoping for? 00:14:04.240 --> 00:14:06.100 In the moment that you were doing those things 00:14:06.100 --> 00:14:08.480 and using those as your battle cry and this is 00:14:08.480 --> 00:14:10.139 what we're doing for our family, wasn't there 00:14:10.139 --> 00:14:13.200 joy in those moments? I'm the same. I mean, if 00:14:13.200 --> 00:14:16.799 I could do Satan's plan on behalf of my children 00:14:16.799 --> 00:14:18.139 and be like, no, we're all getting there together. 00:14:18.159 --> 00:14:20.620 It's going to be perfect. I would do that, but 00:14:20.620 --> 00:14:23.059 that's just not how it works out. And also from 00:14:23.059 --> 00:14:26.259 other talks that we've discussed, You can still 00:14:26.259 --> 00:14:28.759 find joy even, you know, we had this conversation 00:14:28.759 --> 00:14:31.100 where it was like, you're only as happy as your 00:14:31.100 --> 00:14:33.759 saddest child. Do you remember who said it? I 00:14:33.759 --> 00:14:35.899 don't remember. It's not coming to my mind right 00:14:35.899 --> 00:14:37.259 in the second. Someone who had a grandma with 00:14:37.259 --> 00:14:39.080 a lot of grandkids. Yeah, and he was like, there's 00:14:39.080 --> 00:14:41.120 no way that's true. Over 100 posterities, like 00:14:41.120 --> 00:14:43.919 at least one of them is unhappy in any given 00:14:43.919 --> 00:14:48.000 moment. And so you can still find joy. He can 00:14:48.000 --> 00:14:53.019 make it possible to find joy despite. you know, 00:14:53.019 --> 00:14:55.200 the people that you love not doing exactly what 00:14:55.200 --> 00:14:58.100 you'd hope for them to do. Find joy in knowing 00:14:58.100 --> 00:15:01.919 that the atonement of Jesus Christ is real. Know 00:15:01.919 --> 00:15:04.340 that you're living your covenants. Like you don't 00:15:04.340 --> 00:15:06.460 have to have regrets that, you know, you set 00:15:06.460 --> 00:15:08.320 them aside. I've seen that. It's like, oh, my 00:15:08.320 --> 00:15:10.259 kids are not living the gospel and we want to 00:15:10.259 --> 00:15:12.179 all be together. So like, let me have a terrestrial 00:15:12.179 --> 00:15:14.789 life so that I can match that. Let's not. go 00:15:14.789 --> 00:15:17.090 with that plan. Like I love the promise blessings, 00:15:17.190 --> 00:15:19.750 you know, in the celestial life that, um, the 00:15:19.750 --> 00:15:22.950 celestial living that your blessings can, um, 00:15:23.029 --> 00:15:26.950 broadcast onto your posterity. I feel that, I 00:15:26.950 --> 00:15:28.830 feel that that's a promise that I'm being made. 00:15:28.889 --> 00:15:30.850 So regardless of what that looks like for them, 00:15:30.909 --> 00:15:32.129 they're, they're finding their own happiness. 00:15:32.230 --> 00:15:35.409 I'm teaching them everything that I can. I can't 00:15:35.409 --> 00:15:37.990 do it with the, uh, I can't do it with the mindset 00:15:37.990 --> 00:15:42.620 like, um, that they have to make. exact decisions 00:15:42.620 --> 00:15:44.600 like I would make. They're their own person. 00:15:44.720 --> 00:15:50.139 And I'm finding more joy in, as I'm kind of releasing 00:15:50.139 --> 00:15:53.190 that control over the situation. Yeah. Again, 00:15:53.210 --> 00:15:56.730 just like father. I mean, who knows better that 00:15:56.730 --> 00:15:58.250 they want all of their children back to them, 00:15:58.289 --> 00:15:59.710 but still had to give them choices. Heavenly 00:15:59.710 --> 00:16:02.409 father, right? And with Satan who fell, you know 00:16:02.409 --> 00:16:04.250 what I mean? Like he's been through all this. 00:16:04.350 --> 00:16:07.429 I do feel, Abby, so, you know, I'm almost in 00:16:07.429 --> 00:16:09.730 my fifth decade of life and I do feel like there 00:16:09.730 --> 00:16:11.769 was a point and I feel like there was a point 00:16:11.769 --> 00:16:14.769 for every single parent when you go, oh, shoot. 00:16:15.500 --> 00:16:18.080 I really can't make the decisions for my kids. 00:16:18.580 --> 00:16:20.840 They're going to do their own thing. And wow. 00:16:21.120 --> 00:16:23.340 And, and then like, it just starts a whole thing 00:16:23.340 --> 00:16:25.360 of, oh, wow. Like how does Heavenly Father and 00:16:25.360 --> 00:16:27.580 Heavenly Mother do this? How, what is their, 00:16:27.740 --> 00:16:30.720 you know, just all of that. It just gives you, 00:16:30.759 --> 00:16:34.600 again, parenting helps you to co -create and 00:16:34.600 --> 00:16:38.000 be a, co -create with, with God, meaning creating 00:16:38.000 --> 00:16:41.299 a family and asking him to help guide you and 00:16:41.299 --> 00:16:44.000 ask, how did you do it? And you know what I mean? 00:16:44.460 --> 00:16:46.639 It's always, it always gives us an opportunity 00:16:46.639 --> 00:16:49.600 to turn to him and say, how can I do this better? 00:16:49.700 --> 00:16:51.879 I literally had a conversation with a mother 00:16:51.879 --> 00:16:55.539 of older adult children this week. And, you know, 00:16:55.539 --> 00:16:57.600 she had her like, and she's like, how are you 00:16:57.600 --> 00:16:59.120 guys doing? I'm like, I'm great. All of my kids 00:16:59.120 --> 00:17:01.480 are younger than 18. So I still get to be bossy 00:17:01.480 --> 00:17:04.279 about everything that they do. Like ask me in 00:17:04.279 --> 00:17:05.940 a couple of years when I know that that's not 00:17:05.940 --> 00:17:09.980 going to be the case. I just want to say, again, 00:17:10.099 --> 00:17:13.079 those teachings of Jesus Christ that we see in 00:17:13.079 --> 00:17:14.559 the proclamation about faith, prayer, repentance, 00:17:14.740 --> 00:17:16.500 forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, 00:17:16.700 --> 00:17:21.180 and wholesome recreational activities. Do I think 00:17:21.180 --> 00:17:24.240 that I'm doing any of that perfectly? No. Do 00:17:24.240 --> 00:17:27.400 I think that trying the best that I can in each 00:17:27.400 --> 00:17:32.680 of those areas is my job? Yes. Sometimes I'm 00:17:32.680 --> 00:17:34.839 more heavily focused on one or two of those things, 00:17:34.880 --> 00:17:40.769 but in essence. I know my goal is to have a council 00:17:40.769 --> 00:17:43.809 and have family discussions and have a strong 00:17:43.809 --> 00:17:46.569 family unit and help each other in this journey 00:17:46.569 --> 00:17:49.089 of life and be a good sounding board for the 00:17:49.089 --> 00:17:52.589 kids and help them to grow into good adults. 00:17:52.730 --> 00:17:57.130 But if I know that I've tried my best to teach 00:17:57.130 --> 00:18:01.170 those things, I can be less uptight about what 00:18:01.170 --> 00:18:03.769 the outcome of that is. Long term, I do think 00:18:03.769 --> 00:18:07.140 that those promises are real. Yeah. And like 00:18:07.140 --> 00:18:10.559 you said, you know, do the very best you can 00:18:10.559 --> 00:18:12.900 because we're not going to do it perfectly. Again, 00:18:13.180 --> 00:18:16.579 for parents, the Savior steps in as we turn to 00:18:16.579 --> 00:18:19.920 Him and ask Him to make up the difference, right? 00:18:20.019 --> 00:18:21.779 Because He makes everything all right in the 00:18:21.779 --> 00:18:23.880 end. So even that, He can fill the gaps there. 00:18:24.539 --> 00:18:27.559 I maybe have a challenge on this one. I feel 00:18:27.559 --> 00:18:30.339 like in more recent conversations, people will 00:18:30.339 --> 00:18:33.480 say like they like the family proclamation, but 00:18:33.480 --> 00:18:37.609 except. a particular line or phrase or part and 00:18:37.609 --> 00:18:40.190 they want to put their own interpretation on 00:18:40.190 --> 00:18:43.670 it, I would make a challenge. Step away from 00:18:43.670 --> 00:18:45.349 the things you don't like about the proclamation 00:18:45.349 --> 00:18:48.829 and read it with eyes to like grasp on and appreciate 00:18:48.829 --> 00:18:51.710 something from it. Just kind of switch the gears 00:18:51.710 --> 00:18:53.910 on. Piece that you're feeling uncomfortable about 00:18:53.910 --> 00:18:56.509 and you don't want to focus on, focus on the 00:18:56.509 --> 00:18:59.829 truth of some other particular line and develop 00:18:59.829 --> 00:19:05.589 a testimony of that thing. you know then issue 00:19:05.589 --> 00:19:07.349 your challenge to pick another part that you 00:19:07.349 --> 00:19:10.650 agree with without real question maybe apply 00:19:10.650 --> 00:19:12.410 it a little bit differently or just think on 00:19:12.410 --> 00:19:13.970 a ponder on it see how that affects your life 00:19:13.970 --> 00:19:15.869 because you're doing those things makes me wonder 00:19:15.869 --> 00:19:18.670 if the more that we do that You know, if we see 00:19:18.670 --> 00:19:21.849 the softness and the love and the doctrine that's 00:19:21.849 --> 00:19:24.109 in those lines that we aren't so settled with. 00:19:24.190 --> 00:19:26.269 It's something that I do. If I hear something 00:19:26.269 --> 00:19:29.289 and it's not settled right with me, I don't just 00:19:29.289 --> 00:19:31.269 take it like, oh, well, I have to believe that 00:19:31.269 --> 00:19:34.529 because they said it. I allow the time to feel 00:19:34.529 --> 00:19:36.250 comfortable with it. And I usually start with, 00:19:36.289 --> 00:19:40.470 you know, something. that I really have a core 00:19:40.470 --> 00:19:42.849 understanding of, then I can kind of... Start 00:19:42.849 --> 00:19:44.670 with what you know. Yeah, I'm not unpeeling layers. 00:19:44.750 --> 00:19:48.410 I'm adding to until it can... It's kind of the 00:19:48.410 --> 00:19:49.910 faith and hope thing my husband always talks 00:19:49.910 --> 00:19:53.410 about, that I can expand my faith and hope in 00:19:53.410 --> 00:19:56.089 those things until I'm able to encompass it and 00:19:56.089 --> 00:19:58.329 find a place for it to set well with me. That's 00:19:58.329 --> 00:20:01.549 very good, Abby. I love that challenge. It's 00:20:01.549 --> 00:20:09.170 great. Also, if you want to go online to... Our 00:20:09.170 --> 00:20:11.529 Facebook group, we could have a discussion there 00:20:11.529 --> 00:20:14.230 about the things. Maybe what's the line from 00:20:14.230 --> 00:20:16.349 the family proclamation that's been the most 00:20:16.349 --> 00:20:18.730 useful, helpful to you in raising your own family? 00:20:18.869 --> 00:20:21.190 For sure. Something like that. Do you have anything 00:20:21.190 --> 00:20:24.490 else, Abby? Okay. Well, in closing, I'm going 00:20:24.490 --> 00:20:27.309 to end with what Elder Rasband said. Our Father 00:20:27.309 --> 00:20:29.890 in Heaven has provided the proclamation on the 00:20:29.890 --> 00:20:32.950 family to help guide us home to Him, to help 00:20:32.950 --> 00:20:35.569 us learn and be filled with love, strength, purpose, 00:20:35.789 --> 00:20:38.019 and eternal understanding. That's what we're 00:20:38.019 --> 00:20:40.720 all hoping for, right? With all my soul, I plead 00:20:40.720 --> 00:20:42.519 with you to live close to Him and His beloved 00:20:42.519 --> 00:20:45.420 Son. I promise as you do, the Spirit will inspire 00:20:45.420 --> 00:20:48.279 and guide you and help you feel in your heart 00:20:48.279 --> 00:20:51.180 their promised peace that passeth all understanding. 00:20:51.599 --> 00:20:53.660 And He says this in the name of Jesus Christ. 00:20:53.799 --> 00:20:54.019 Amen.