Welcome to Closer to Christ through General Conference,
where two friends who love Jesus share our own
approach to studying the most recent General
Conference talks. This is Abby. And Amy. Let's
jump into it. Today we're discussing the talk
Cherishing Life by Elder Neal L. Anderson of
the Quorum of the Twelve. Our Savior Jesus Christ
taught us, By this shall all men know that ye
are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.
I love that he started this way. I feel like
it spoke to my heart, and I hope that it spoke
to everyone's heart who was listening, that we
are applying this across the board. And he's
going to go into a sensitive subject. Right.
you know, once you get to the end of the talk
and you realize this is what he started, he actually
ends with this exactly too. He starts and finishes
it, that it's to say, there's going to be all
sorts of fillings that are conjured up with this
particular topic. And this is coming from a place
of love. Yes. Apply the principle of love. Elder
Anderson received a letter from a bishop in Utah
who shares a touching story of a young woman
in crisis and the help that was made available
to her. She and her family had been away from
the church for some time, but decided to come
back. As they came back, the daughter felt God's
love love during a testimony meeting and began
the repentance process. Shortly after, she learned
she was pregnant and, despite pressure from her
boyfriend to terminate the pregnancy, chose to
keep the baby. With overwhelming love and support
from her ward, including her bishop and young
woman president, she felt guided by the Lord.
In February, she and her family joyfully welcomed
her baby boy, surrounded by a caring church community.
This church community truly demonstrated that
they were true disciples of Jesus Christ because
of the love that they showed. President Russell
M. Nelson said a hallmark of the Lord's true
and living church will always be an organized
effort to minister to individual children of
God, ministering with loving kindness to the
one just as he did. I think of times when someone
has experienced maybe injury or illness, job
loss, death of a loved one. Think of those people
who you have ministered to or who have ministered
to you. Knowing today that he's going to be talking
about, you know, abortion is going to have us
stop and pause and think, what if that is the
experience that's coming up? What can I do to
help that one person in need that's experiencing
an unplanned or unwed pregnancy? Our thoughts
are going to go in a certain direction. let things
immediately come to mind on how you could help
and support that individual. That's a great way
to go at it, Abby. Again, applying love. When
a single woman discovers that she's expecting
an unanticipated child, health concerns, spiritual
turmoil, embarrassment, financial worries, educational
questions, marriage uncertainty, and the sadness
of shattered dreams can, in a moment of pain
and bewilderment, lead a thoughtful woman to
take steps that will bring deep pain. and regret.
For anyone listening who have experienced the
deep pain and regret from having or participating
in an abortion, please remember, these might
have been my favorite words of the whole talk.
Although we cannot change the past, God can heal
the past. I love that part. Forgiveness can come
through the miracle of his atoning grace as you
turn to him with a humble and repentant heart.
It's incredible to think that someone who has
held on to the pain of that loss, maybe decades
ago or maybe just recently, can be told by an
apostle of God that humility and a repentant
heart can relieve this person of the burden that
they feel. I didn't see a lot of controversy
about this talk. Did you see that? I didn't,
but I'm not on social right now. Yeah, and I'm
not really following people that, you know, kind
of like just muting people that I don't want
to hear from. So it could be there. So it could
be there. But, you know, I'm assuming that maybe
there was another. group of people that heard
that and have been carrying that burden for a
long time and rejoiced just being told like i
totally would no matter what there's no there's
no limits on the savior and and what his atonement
can do and that maybe all this time they've been
like well murder you murdered somebody or something
and they're just like i can't i can't even bring
that up it's like one of the hardest deepest
darkest things that i carry no you can absolutely
um I know he's speaking to a worldwide church
and I'm not going to pretend like I know all
of the phrases and the terminology that this
topic brings up across the world landscape in
the political debate. But I do know a lot of
our audience is from America and they're very
familiar with the fact that two words are often
attached to the sanctity of mortal birth. And
that is the word life and choice. And maybe that
line lingered. Or triggered something inside
of you, like you got to pick your side. Your
mind starts running through your thoughts on
why your stance is, you know, of being either
pro -choice or pro -life is superior. Abby, I
love that you said that. Those are the things
that touched my heart as he was speaking. I loved
it because he said life is a most precious part
of our father's perfect plan. So he's already
talked about life and how precious it is. And
he said right before that he said life and choice
are both essential in this difficult issue. Our
political landscape tries to make it like a side.
You pick one or the other. And he said, no, guys.
They're both important. Yes. But in what context?
And he says, by his decree, we cherish and preserve
life. I think those two words were some of my
favorite. Cherish and preserve, because those
are guiding principles for the rest of our lives.
And we choose the continuation of life once conceived.
So again, cherish and preserve life, and we continue
life once it's conceived. We also treasure the
gift of choice. Like you said, there's choice
and there's life of moral agency. helping to
strengthen righteous choices approved by God
that bring eternal happiness. When a man and
woman are in a fragile time facing this crucial
choice, our words, our hands, spiritually, emotionally,
and financially can bless them to fill the Savior's
love. I feel like this is an action item. I'm
well past the age of having an unwanted teen
pregnancy. probably realistically having children
at all, but I'm raising children that that could
be, you know, the situation they face, or maybe,
you know, I'll have church callings where like
my circle of influence will be this, you know,
young teen population where this could be a very
real and true thing. And certainly, you know,
we're in a ward that issue has come up and it
could certainly continue to come up in the future.
The ears that I put on to hear this talk is,
what is my job? What can I do to help in this
most difficult time? Those are the action items
that I'm going to hear pop out. So what can I
do spiritually, emotionally, and financially
to bless those in this situation, feel the Savior's
love? And then President Henry B. Eyring said,
bring a clarifying adjustment to their spiritual
eyes from what they think they see to what they
cannot yet see. So appreciate that. Meaning what
value, you know, if all that they see right immediately
in front of them is how this is going to ruin
their life, it's going to prevent them from doing
X, Y, Z, how do they afford it? All of these
perceived roadblocks making, you know, there's
like maybe four choices here, but making only
one choice, like rise to the top, seeming like
the only option out there. Because that's the
message the world wants them to hear. I love
that this next section is titled The Doctrine
of Mortal Life, and it starts with a quote from
President Dallin H. Oaks, who said, Our attitude
toward abortion is not based on revealed knowledge
of when mortal life begins, because sometimes
that is the debate. It is fixed by our knowledge
that all the spirit children of God must come
to this earth for a glorious purpose, and that
individual identity began long before conception
and will continue for all the eternities to come.
I really appreciated when I read this how clear
and succinct it was. Yeah. It kind of just ends
this pointless debate that we have with others,
like when did life start? Doesn't matter. Well,
it matters. It started eons ago. Yeah. In the
pre -existence. Can't put a number on it, though.
Yeah. Yes. Whatever word you want to call it,
and if we're going to try to slice it up to how
many cells are in there to call it life, we have
this much different doctrine. We know it started
way before, and it goes way after this short
stint here. The word of the Lord concerning the
unborn given voice to the first presidency and
the Quorum of the Twelve have never varied and
echoes the words of prophets throughout the ages,
giving divine clarity to what the Lord has asked
of us. Quote, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter
-day Saints believes in the sanctity of human
life. Therefore, the Church opposes elective
abortion for personal or social convenience and
counsels its members not to submit to perform,
encourage, pay for or arrange for such abortions
and obviously you know their caveat of the the
exceptions that exist. He goes on and he says,
the Lord allows for possible exceptions when
a pregnancy results from rape or incest, or a
competent physician determines that the life
or health of the mother is in serious jeopardy,
or a competent physician determines that the
fetus has severe defects that will not allow
the baby to survive beyond birth. And then the
first presidency continues. Abortion is a most
serious matter. Even in these rare situations,
it should be considered only after the persons
responsible have received confirmation through
prayer and counsel with others. Thirty years
ago, the Lord's prophet issued a proclamation
to the world. It includes these words. We declare
that God has commanded that the sacred powers
of procreation are to be employed only between
man and woman, lawfully wedded as husband and
wife. We declare the means by which mortal life
is created to be divinely appointed. We affirm
the sanctity of life and of its importance to
God's eternal plan. I never really considered
that line being pertinent to this talk, but in
the context of this talk, it is. It is. Totally.
Nurturing and protecting life that is yet unborn
is not a political position. It is a moral law
confirmed by the Lord through his prophets. Statement
by President J. Reuben Clark, who served in the
first presidency, beautifully describes our youth
today. He said, the youth of the church are hungry
for things of the spirit, and they are eager
to learn the gospel, and they wait. Or they want
it straight and undiluted. They want to know
about our beliefs, and they want to gain testimonies
of the truth. They are inquirers, seekers of
truth. So I felt like an action item's in here.
Let's speak more often with faith and compassion
to our youth in our homes, with each other in
Relief Society and Elders Corps meetings about
the Lord's law of chastity, the sanctity of life,
and the care of the unborn and their mothers.
And again, paired with this is... This is the
truth. This is how God, He has designed it to
be. But also in those same settings say, when
things happen, you know, what's the next step?
Those two conversations hopefully can be paired
together. And so interesting that he said, speak
more often and then also with faith and with
compassion. Like that is very, it's very helpful.
A dear sister, this is... one of the stories
that was shared. A dear sister wrote to me of
an experience she had decades ago. As a 17 year
old, I found myself pregnant with little to no
support from my boyfriend. I felt ashamed and
alone, but never considered an abortion. I had
my loving family and my bishop with whom I met
regularly for guidance. I turned to God. i studied
the scriptures i prayed for and found strength
through my savior and the repentance process
and then this is she shares where she came to
i received an answer to my prayers that i could
not deny it was heartbreaking but i knew i'd
be placing my daughter for adoption i prayed
for courage and felt the savior's love so clearly
through repentance i know that god answers prayers
and strengthens us i love that she um She applied
the process of forgiveness and turning to God
for answers because that is across the board,
no matter what situation we find ourselves in,
any difficult one where we need to counsel with
the Lord. I love that she felt comfortable turning
to God because somewhere else in here, it's just
kind of like, well, I've made this mistake. He
doesn't want to hear from me. Oh, I'm making
this next decision. And that is so false. He
wants to hear. Right. He is. Yeah, I'm sure he
was so pleased with her turning to him. In any
moment, especially when she could maybe feel
that there was distance. A loving couple adopted
this precious baby girl and taught her the gospel.
She is now married with a beautiful family of
her own. At times, profoundly difficult and agonizing
uncertainty can accompany the protection of life.
Again, love that we're talking about protection
of life. How many times have we talked about
how doing the things we are prompted to isn't
always the easy thing? But again. You know, it
doesn't always bring immediate relief, but in
time, we keep going on and on until the day we
look back and we see that the decision we made
was right, which is another reason I want to
circle back to what President Eyring said when
he said, you know, we can help them to see things
more clearly that they're not seeing right now.
Sometimes emotions completely cloud our, like,
there's probably fear and shame and all these
other feelings that definitely can get in the
way of making good choices that will last for
eternity. Yep. And all of these stories were
obviously shared with permission, looked in the
footnotes and it was like with permission, with
permission. But how powerful that this woman,
you know, if she's comfortable that it's being
shared here, she's probably testified of that
in different situations. She's probably been
invited to talk about her story in a Relief Society
or in a young woman's situation. And how many
more people have learned that lesson? She's not
the first or the last. Turning a hard situation
into something that's so positive and good. Totally.
I mean, I'm a sucker for adoption videos. And
when that baby was placed in these parents' arms,
I'm just like a very sad, like the very sad,
sad moment of this young girl knowing, even though
she probably wanted to keep her baby, that the
right thing was to give it up for adoption in
this situation. In that situation, yes. I'm not
trying to say that that's always the right situation,
but it was in her situation. that immense grief
that she probably felt and has probably held
onto for many years, the exact opposite, the
joy that that other family would feel. But I
mean, also there's moments in the adoptive family's
lives that they probably feel that pain and sadness
for what the birth mom or parents are missing
out on. So many emotions and all of them are
good. And it's not like we said, it's not like
these decisions make it easy. It just, with time.
You know, being able to see it from a perspective
of time, you know, just things have softened
and we can kind of look back on that and just
say, oh, it was for the best good for a lot of
reasons. Another story shared. Recently, a young
couple whom Kathy and I loved wrote me about
their precious baby they were expecting. They
were expecting a baby and at the 10 -week mark,
they found out that their child had Down syndrome.
Often with Down syndrome, multiple heart defects
can pair with that. Despite pressure from medical
professionals to consider termination, they sought
divine guidance and felt peace and comfort through
the Spirit. The father described their daughter
as a special soul with a deep desire to join
their family. While the mother shared how the
Savior healed her heart and gave her hope. I
kind of feel like the way this story reads is
that every time they would go and they still
had the option. Do you want to abort? This baby's
going to have a hard life. Do you want to have
an abortion? It's not too late. Do you want to
have an abortion? previously was like oh that
diagnosis that's a hard thing and hadn't come
to terms with it every subsequent time that she
was asked if she wanted to end this baby's life
and you know save them from a lot of hard things
and the couple from a lot of hard things it be
it made her more determined and more determined
to preserve that life because that life was important
for whatever reason in their family at that time
it was important so they trusted god's plan they
welcomed their baby girl It says one week ago,
and they're grateful to be hers forever. Wow.
Undaunted faith and remarkable courage are hallmarks
of disciples of Jesus Christ. I think these hard
situations that we're presented with do help
us to fortify, strengthen our testimony of the
things that we know to be true. Adam and I, we
carry a... double recessive genetic disease.
And after we found that diagnosis out with our
first child, subsequent children, we were encouraged
to have amniocentesis like on our second kid.
And so we met with the perinatologist and that's
what she was suggesting and weighing the consequences
and basically saying, well, if you find out the
baby has cystic fibrosis, then you can abort
and just save all of that pain and heartache.
And I'm like, that's a hard thing. we knew we
were keeping our babies, like whatever may come.
It wasn't an option, but to be told that by a
medical professional, like basically this is
the easy way out and like no shame, no harm there.
I've faced that decision in my own life. And
for myself, I thought Heavenly Father knows exactly,
you know, what combination of kids we're going
to get, whether they're going to have cystic
fibrosis or not, or heart conditions or Down
syndrome. It all comes with a purpose in my mind.
For sure, Abby. Over the years, many individuals
have sought to return to the covenant path and
reclaim their priesthood and temple blessings.
One man, after being unfaithful to his wife and
to his covenants, fathered a child with another
woman who considered abortion. His faithful wife
pleaded for the child's life and promised to
raise him as her own. Ten years later, she lovingly
cared for the boy and supported her husband's
repentance. Her ability to forgive and embrace
the child came through her faith in Jesus Christ.
Honestly, I love the way he tells this story
because he's like, how was she able to do this?
I think that was the question for every single
person listening to this. And then he said, through
her faith in Jesus Christ. And the Spirit just
witnessed to my heart again. She maybe had lost
faith in her husband for a time, but she put
her trust and faith in the right guy. Jesus Christ,
you can do. anything that you're called to do.
So it was her faith in Jesus Christ and her deep
belief in the sacredness of life. She knew that
the unborn child was a child of God, innocent
and pure. That's a fact. I know, right? And also
when I, I love when someone speaks truth. And
in this case, when we're listening to conference,
when our general leaders or the apostles, a prophet.
When they speak truth, it just resounds with
my heart. And I just love feeling that over and
over again, the Holy Ghost saying. That's true.
That's true. It's like it, I don't know, it cements
it deeper into my heart. And when I heard those
words, Abby, just like you said, that's totally
true. That's how it felt listening to it. There's
a possibility other people listening to this
talk were angry the whole time through. Could
be. And that's definitely your right to be angry.
But I would challenge you to read that first
paragraph again and just ask Heavenly Father,
is he really coming from a place of love? And
if he is. Can you help soften me enough to just
give him a chance to make the case that he's
making here? So Abbey President Russell M. Nelson
said, A hallmark of the Lord's true and living
church will always be an organized effort to
minister to individual children of God, ministering
with love and kindness, like we talked about
before, to the one just as he did. Very last
footnote referenced resources available to us
as members of the church. And I feel like if
he had been given another 15 minutes to talk
about the pulpit, he probably would have just
read through them. Instead of just putting it
over there, right? I don't love to just read
things, but this is definitely like too many
times we're listening to these general conference
talks, like the audio version and the print's
not in front of us. Too many things were like
the Spirit directed me time and time again, check
out that footnote, check out that footnote. So
I happened to get my paper copy yesterday from
the mail preparing for this thing, and I was
prompted to do that. And so I went to the references
that he used, and I thought, you know what? I'm
hearing what you're asking us to do, and I think
that he wants us to put all of this right here
so that... If you're driving and listening. You
can pause. That's the end of the podcast. We've
regurgitated the talk as it was given and tried
to just stay out of the political like discord
that is like so present with this topic. Or just
the sensitivity of everyone having their own
personal revelation on this. Right. But this
information is so good. He referenced three things.
The first one was unwed pregnancy, which comes
from the topic in questions. It says, Heavenly
Father loves all of His children and shows mercy
to each one regardless of their circumstances.
He is rich in mercy and will support us in our
trials, troubles, and afflictions. Being pregnant
and unmarried can be a difficult time in a person's
life. Each individual experiences unique circumstances
when faced with unwed pregnancy. In deciding
how to proceed, remember that Heavenly Father
will never abandon you or your child. He loves
your child as much as, if not more, than. You
love the child and he desires to help you both.
He cares about and has a plan for both of you
and he will not leave you comfortless. Question,
what do I do now that I'm pregnant? First, remember
that. And again, remember, we're reading this
from word for word outline. Yeah. Remember topics
and questions. You can find it in print if you
want. Remember that your Heavenly Father loves
you and wants to help you as you move forward.
It is never too late to seek His counsel or feel
His Spirit as you seek divine direction. The
health of your child is important. Seek prenatal
care where available and seek information on
prenatal health. Who can I talk to? As you make
decisions for your future, seek Heavenly Father's
guidance through prayer and counsel with your
parents, bishop, medical provider, and other
trusted individuals who seek to support you.
Remember, you are not alone, and many people
care about you and want to support you as you
move forward with your life. In addition, your
bishop can provide counsel to you as your priesthood
leader and can also help you begin the process
of repentance as appropriate. What are my options?
When you experience unwed pregnancy, you will
have to choose one of four options. Marriage,
adoption, single parenting, or abortion. And
again, it says, see the general handbook as far
as this goes on abortion for an explanation of
why the church does not support abortions, except
in rare circumstances that we've gone over. What
you choose will depend on your unique circumstances.
Again, that's what I meant. Like, each person
has a choice between those four things. And just
because, you know, we're talking mostly about
one of the three, just because one of the three
was best for you does not mean that someone else
you've heard about that it was best for them.
Again, it's personal revelation and what the
circumstances. the question, how do I decide
what to do? Remember, whatever you decide for
you and your child, some people will agree with
your decisions and others will not. Every individual
situation is different. So the answer for one
person's may not work for another. One thing
you can be sure of is that no one will have given
as much time, effort, and thought to the unique
circumstances of your situation as you and the
Lord. Trust in the divine counsel to receive
from Heavenly Father as you make your decision.
Scriptures teach us how to make decisions. um
through study and prayer it says behold you have
not understood you have supposed that i would
give it unto you when you took no thought save
it was to ask me but behold i say unto you that
you must study it out in your mind then you must
ask if it be right and if it is right i will
cause that your bosom shall burn within you therefore
you shall fill it is right studying a decision
out in your mind includes researching the information
available for each of us to challenge each of
the challenges we face we can consider the following
questions What direction are parents, bishop,
and other trusted individuals giving you? What
are the rewards and challenges for both you and
your child associated with each decision? If
I were to place the needs of a child above the
needs of everyone else, including my own, how
might this influence my decision? These are just
a few of the questions you may want to explore
prior to taking your decision to the Lord or
for His counsel. Remember, He cannot assist you
in making your decision unless you invite Him
to be part of them. So good. Will I get through
this challenge? Regardless of your decisions,
the Lord is mindful of you. He wants you and
your child to be successful and happy. Though
you may be discouraged at times, remember to
learn from the past and then let it go so you
can move forward into the future. If you move
forward today, resolving to keep the Lord ever
present in your decisions, you will surely succeed.
If I know someone who is experiencing an unwed
pregnancy, how might I help? If you're seeking
advice on how to minister to a family member
or friend, know that Heavenly Father loves you
and values your desire to help. Ministering to
an unwed parent in a positive manner will require
knowledge and inspiration. Seek knowledge from
numerous resources, including church handbooks,
magazines, and conference talks, as well as academic
books and articles. Seek spiritual knowledge
through prayer and priesthood blessings. You
may also consider counseling with your bishop
as you explore ways that you might be able to
help. Maybe the most important gift you can give
is your continued friendship and nonjudgmental
listening ear. I think how depressing it would
be if you found out your child was expecting
a baby. And you find out you're like the last
person that they felt safe that they could talk
to. Like less disappointing than that they have
this decision to face. Like I want to make sure
for my action item that we're very comfortable
talking about these possible scenarios. Like
you teach true principles. Yes, I would prefer
that you wait until you are legally and lawfully
married to delve into the powers of procreation.
That should be not the case for you. Please trust
my love for you is enough to handle whatever
decision that we need to go through. We're in
this together. Never feel alone in the challenge
that's right in front of your face. Never let
the world's message that you have to fight that
alone, you have to keep that secret, you have
to bear that burden alone, be the thing that,
you know, the message that... is front of mind
right yeah okay um so that was that section then
um i copied and pasted what he said on um the
church yeah this came right from the church handbook
on abortion the lord commanded thou shalt not
kill nor do anything like unto it the church
opposes elective abortion for personal social
convenience and we we kind of quoted that um
already from the talk like he he wanted to list
those and be very clear on it because I know
why he did it. People are like, well, you're
forcing them to have the baby. That's going to
kill the mother. Or they were raped or there
was incest. There's clearly exceptions to this.
But even when we agree that, you know, those
exceptions exist, they wanted to make sure that
this rises to the top. Carefully consider that.
Yes. It's forgivable. Yes, like the Jesus Christ
and Atonement is going to cover that. But that
still is not going to override what we see in
studies, the back end of the emotional turmoil
that abortion has on people. So I've watched
people who have been raped. They choose to carry
the baby. Full term, some keep the baby, some
give the baby for adoption. Still, there's like
a multitude of choices to be made after you say,
you know, no to abortion, yes to preserving life.
And then what does that life look like? Multiple
scenarios. I'm sure that they used guidance of
the Spirit to get to that point. And they're
all good. They're all good options to consider.
It's not just one answer solves all. That was
the exception. So, yeah, I'm going to do the
abortion. That doesn't solve all the problems
just in one fell swoop. Now, when you're in a
position as a leader and somebody comes forward
to you that one of these situations has occurred,
it may be necessary to report these circumstances
to, what do you say like? Officials. Yeah, officials.
So, you know, what's awesome is that if you trust,
if you have a relationship with your bishop,
that's one of those top people that you trust
that they can help you navigate what the best
situation is. Maybe your bishop is the one that
helps you figure out the word and the dialogue,
how you can bring this to your parents, because
not that you're afraid to talk to your parents
about it, but you don't know the words. You kind
of just want like a buffer in there just so that
that conversation. It's a very hard thing. So
whoever feels like that safe person to you, we're
encouraging you to think now in advance. Who
would you turn to if you had these pressing questions
to ask? I wanted to jump to resources that are
available to single expectant parents. Love that.
As you help with sensitive or trying situations,
remember the following guiding principles. Love
first, listen to understand, teach truth, nourish
faith, and minister. Again, all of these principles
really apply across the board and they're very
well used here. We're going to go through this
on specific to being an unexpected single parent,
but we'll line out what those mean because it's
the suggested dialogue when you're Like Amy said,
when you're dealing with any hard topic decision,
life choices. I love when he said at the end,
it says frequently review details on these guiding
principles just to get you right back to where
we are with this. Let's see right here. Single
expectant parents may experience new and unanticipated
challenges as they navigate an unplanned pregnancy.
They face the responsibility of deciding a future
for their child and for themselves. Some will
marry, others will place their child for adoption,
and some will decide to single parent. He shared
a situation with each of these. It is not unusual
for single expectant parents to contemplate abortion.
However, due to the sanctity of life, the church
opposes elective abortion for personal or social
convenience and counsels its members not to submit
to. Perform, encourage, pay for, or arrange for
such abortions. Okay, this is good. Family Services
provides free consultation for single expectant
parents and can also provide information about
marriage, adoption, single parenting. Encourage
the single expectant parent to meet with his
or her bishop who can connect him or her to Family
Services. If they're not available, the bishop
may have access to additional counseling resources.
If you become aware that a pregnancy was a result
of abuse or sexual assault. contact civil authorities.
There's helplines available for this. Single
expectant parents are often pressured with advice
about the right choice to make in response to
their pregnancy. It can place strain on their
relationships at the very time they need the
most support. Single expectant parents can benefit
greatly from loving encouragement to seek spiritual
confirmation for their choices rather than relying
solely on the advice of others. They may wonder,
does Heavenly Father really want to give them
advice because of their prior choices? However,
in every single thing by prayer and supplication
with thanksgiving, let your That's what I highlighted
before as like an action item. It becomes our
responsibility to say, what skill set do I have
that can be most helpful in this situation? Nowhere
in there is it going to be rebuke them and tell
them, that was a really bad decision that you
made. We're past that point. What can we do to
love and support them and help them make the
best decision for them going forward, them and
the unborn child? Express hope and healing through
the Savior and his atonement. Identify their
identity as a child of heavenly parents with
individual strengths, talents, and abilities.
You're never going to know how strong and amazing
you are until faced with this to see the stuff
that you're made of. Share confidence in Heavenly
Father's desire and ability to help them. Foster
a connection between them and their bishop. And
if applicable, encourage pondering their patriarchal
blessing for direction and comfort. Offer to
arrange priesthood blessing. Support thoughtful
exploration of their options, which we've listed.
A single expectant parent's decision about their
pregnancy is going to impact the lives of their
family members. Thoughtfully strive to understand
their individual needs and perspective. Encourage
board councils, leaders to actively serve the
expectant parents and their families. Counsel
them together. And some family members may not
agree with a single expectant parent's decision
regarding their future. Try to avoid aligning
with family members. Instead, show love and understanding
for differing perspective. Now remember, there
are warden stake resources available. With permission
and help of the single expectant parent, you
can identify a trusted person to be a mentor.
You can identify local resources that provide
support in harmony with the gospel principles,
like counseling or programs or agencies like
family services. If the single expectant parents
are considering parenting, you could encourage
them to read and participate in strengthening
the family, marriage and family relations classes,
or to read the associated material. materials
so basically you become aware of all of the resources
that are available in the situation and i felt
like that was the charge the call there's so
much that we can do at this point where where
these experiences might come our way and be prepared
so that you know when we're hit with that hey
i'm expecting a baby that we don't say the wrong
thing that we take a moment take a breath let
the spirit be in the situation let love overshadow
the whole conversation. What can I do for you?
Maybe a hug. Maybe you're just hugging in this
moment, buying some time for the spirit to be
like, don't mess this up, Abby. Say the right
thing. Don't get this wrong. So last thing I'm
going to say is I was very touched by... the
reminder of these guiding principles. So Amy
listed them in just kind of the five points,
but I think they're so cool because they help
with any sensitive or trying situation that we're
going to face. The suggestion is to, like Amy
said, love first. All of God's children are worthy
of love and kindness. We may not understand a
person's individual experiences, but we can always
show love. Why don't you take over the rest,
starting with listen to understand. Listen to
understand. Be careful not to make assumptions
about feelings or behavior. Ask questions and
listen, then respond with interest and empathy.
As you listen, you will nurture trust and gain
understanding in how to minister. Teach truth.
True principles provide the foundation for faithful
choices. As guided by the Spirit, lovingly teach
those truths that will help the person stay on
a path toward eternal joy. Nourish faith. Faith
is founded on trust in a loving Father, on an
understanding of Jesus Christ's atonement, on
confidence in the Holy Ghost's guidance, and
on the assurance that God has a plan for each
person's eternal progression. Encourage individuals
to nourish their personal faith through daily
prayer and scripture study. This is so good,
Abby. Minister. Acting in love. Listening to
understand and seeking direction from the Spirit
will provide a deeper understanding of the best
way to lovingly minister to individual needs.
I definitely want to take a screenshot of this
right here and have this for me because truly
it is the best way to proceed with any hard conversation
and really any way that we deal with the people
that we love in our life. That really is everything.
So just learning these, it'd be great to have
these things in practice. And then when something
comes that's a little more heated and higher,
like elevated emotion and things like that, it'll
already be part of you. The last one that you
read about the minister part, I was thinking
I might not have the answer in this first conversation
of what I can best do for that person. And that's
fine. I think it's something that can take some
time and I'll say, I'll just start praying. Like,
what can I do to help this person the most? And
those little thoughts and impressions will come
to me and I'll reach out and do those things,
you know, as they feel appropriate. But what
I know about myself is on the listen to understand,
like, you come to me with your problem. I think
you want me to solve your problem for you. I'm
going to tell you what you need to do. I know
that that's my character flaw. And I know that
in these situations, if I can just be way more
aware of, I'm just here to listen to what you
have to say. Get it off your chest. If you ask
a question there, I'll say, let me find a resource
that you can study and read out that might help
you rather than me being like, well, this is
the thing that I heard about that. This would
blindside me. I'd be like, I don't know what
to do in your situation. I wouldn't feel comfortable
making that decision for somebody. But time and
time again in this talk, I learned. We each have
our part to play as a ward member, as the mother
of one of these children, as a friend of one
of these people. We get to be the supporting
role. Exactly. And it's kind of a long -term
thing. You might end up babysitting. You might
end up helping them review the profiles for their
future adoption. You might be doing a wedding
for somebody. I don't know. There's a million
things that you could be doing, but I love these
guiding principles. Like you said, screenshot.
Have that available all the time. I'll probably
just put that into the show notes, like a very
specific block. That's it. I know this one was
long. Thank you for sticking with us. Do you
have anything in closing? I'm going to close
with his testimony because it circled right back
to the beginning. He said, Dear brothers and
sisters, the diminishing love. of unborn children
worldwide is a grave concern. God cherishes life.
It is his work and his glory to bring immortality
and eternal life to his children as disciples
of Jesus Christ. We cherish life. By this shall
all men know ye are my disciples, if ye have
love one to another. May we share our love even
more abundantly with those who need us so desperately.
I express my love for you and our Heavenly Father's
love for His children coming to earth in the
name of Jesus Christ, amen. Thanks for sticking
with us. We'll catch you on the next one. See
you next time.