[♪ Music & Voice Over & Outro Music Plays.
Welcome to Closer to Christ through General Conference, where two friends who love Jesus Christ
share our own approach to studying the most recent General Conference talks.
This is Abbey and Amy. Let's jump into it.
Today we're going to talk about Ye Are My Friends by Elder David L. Buckner of the Seventy.
Abbey, this was such a great talk. So, let's just jump right into it.
Our world tries to define friend groups with isms and aights, but the Savior's divine example
as the great unifier teaches us that unity, love, and belonging can be found in the foundation
of the relationships among all of God's children.
The Savior's declaration, Ye Are My Friends, is found in John 15, 14-15.
It can be powerful, clear, and an urgent message that we need to hear to inspire action
for attention for each of us who desire to be one of His followers.
I love that, Abbey.
He jumps right in from that awesome opening to where we can find.
Ye Are My Friends, that did come from John 15, 14-15, but in more modern-day scripture.
It's present in the Doctrine and Covenants quite a bit in section 88.
So, to set the backstory of it, December 1832, appearances of trouble among the nation were becoming more visible
than at any other time since the organization of the church.
Latter-day Saint leaders in Kirtland, Ohio gathered for a conference, and they prepared,
they prayed separately and vocally to the Lord to reveal His will unto them.
And I think they were, I'm listening to a church history podcast, and it's like totally coordinated with this stuff.
You know, back when Jesus came, when Jesus was walking on earth, the Jews had been down by the Romans,
and they kind of thought that their Savior was going to come, and there was going to be a battle to free them from that, right?
But He came for more of like spiritual ailments and to conquer death, right?
And I feel like the saints were in this similar situation.
They were being persecuted on every side and looking for a Zion and looking to gather,
and every time they were doing that, they became victims of political problems, you know?
Hey, they're going to outnumber us shortly, we've got to kick them off of this land, we've got to kick them off of this land.
They're like, this is where the Lord's told us to be.
And they really thought that they were going to be called to rise up an army and fight against it.
That was never his way.
I mean, even Zion's camp, you know, as they united in that way, they ended up being a, they never had to fight actually with that.
It pulled together some of who would end up being the great leaders of our faith.
For sure.
In the end of it.
So anyway, that's the time period that we're talking about.
And things were, I mean, things were very bad for the saints at this time.
So they take it to prayer, and the faithful members during this difficult time were responded to in what we know as Doctrine and Covenant, section 88.
In that section, the Lord comforts them and addresses the saints three different times with two powerful words.
He calls them my friends.
And so this plea is recorded in scripture.
They're often referred to this section as the olive leaf.
This is where the Lord declares a message of peace to the saints.
Revelation emphasizes his love and compassion and closeness to his people, even in or specially in times of tribulation.
He considers the faithful not merely as servants, but as cherished companions, echoing his words in the New Testament, like you did at the beginning, John 15 verses Fortune 15 referenced earlier.
I love that because it took it from, you know, his time on earth in the New Testament, and he makes it like, oh, it's connected to my rage.
This in modern time, you've considered people your friends. So what is it going to take to be numbered among those that you call your friend?
So this revelation brought comfort and guidance to the saints as they faced difficulties and prepared for the great work ahead and knowing, you know, what happened, what ensued from the time in Kirtland to Salt Lake Valley.
And then obviously some like a rough start and patch there too.
Right, since then as well.
You're going to need to be reminded of this olive leaf doctrine.
Wow, that's so good.
So I would say he spent a good portion of his time pointing out that there is a big difference between Jesus Christ calling someone a friend and then the way that the world defines what a friend is.
So I think this would be a great place to ask this question.
How does the Savior's definition of friendship differ from the world's definition of friendship?
That's such a good question, Abby.
So the Savior's definition of a friend differs significantly from the world's definition as it emphasizes covenant relationship, sacrifice and divine love rather than just mutual affection or companionship.
So I think we should break that down because.
Such a good topic, right?
I know. This is definitely one I could see like so many people coming to the table with such good advice.
How they've navigated friendships, how they've, you know, had some.
In religious society.
Yeah, totally.
Maybe elders.
Oh, elders form.
With the different ages, right?
Like, it's true.
At different seasons of your life.
You have so many different perspectives.
How those friendships have shaped you into understanding more about the way that the Savior defines friendship.
Love that.
So, like, let's maybe talk about the characteristics of a friendship as defined by the Savior.
I would submit that one of the first things is that it's based on love and obedience to God because if we go a little deeper into John 15, 14, it says,
You are my friends if you do whatsoever I command you. So to me, that's saying friendship with Christ involves us aligning our will with God.
And then we demonstrate that love through our discipleship or like actually what actions that we do based on the knowledge that we have from him.
I love that. I would also say that in most cases, I would say almost all of them, that when you're aligning your will with God's, that would mean allowing room for forgiveness.
And I would think that if both people were looking to Christ, then both of their focus would be on having resolution and a continued friendship.
There's a word for that. I would say that's like selfless love.
Yes.
Like you can make mistakes, but you know that the intention wasn't to make mistakes.
And so you're able to forgive a little bit differently.
Love that. So Jesus said, Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.
That was in John 15, 13, when he's talking about selfless love.
That's a good scripture reference. I love that these are scripture based and maybe people will be able to pull these up or maybe you can guide them in these spots of where we're coming up with some different ideas.
I would say that friendship as defined by Jesus Christ would come with maybe covenants and there'd be an eternal linkage to it.
So when I'm thinking about my relationship with Jesus Christ, I've made covenants with him.
So our relationship's not fleeting. It's not transactional. You do this and you get this for it.
Right.
But it's loyal and there's trust there and we're sharing a purpose. We're doing these things as we're trying to build the kingdom of God.
I love that, Abby. Another one that comes to mind is inclusive and redeeming.
So the Savior calls, when he calls all of us to be his friends, he's offering mercy and reconciliation, which there we come again to the word reconciliation, right?
Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden and I will give you rest.
This friendship is rooted in his desire to save and to lift others. Isn't that so different?
It's not selective. She's not like, I'm just going to be friends with you and you. I hear the word popping out all.
Everyone.
The invitation was to everybody, not a select few.
I love that. So good. So yes, inclusive and redeeming is that's beautiful.
It is beautiful. And if we think about anybody that's come and walked on the face of this earth, did trust our Savior enough to venture this path, this earth life, versus being part of the third of the host of heavens that didn't.
And I think a lot of that was based on a belief and trust in a friendship with our Savior.
100% and some of us were like, oh yeah, he's got us. I'm totally doing it. And some of us were like, I don't really know about this, but maybe, but I think it stems back to a trusting friendship.
So we had that then in the pre-existence and we have to remember that when we come through the veil and with the encumbrances of life.
Also, I would submit to say I've never even thought of this before, but I just had the thought of what a beautiful comparison there would be between Christ and then between Lucifer.
Because Lucifer would be the example of the worst friend in your entire life because he was a liar and he had no intention of doing what he said he was going to do. Do you know what I mean?
And I would suggest what I was kind of not struggling with per se, but the word friend, as I've listened back to the podcast, there's a lot of times that I'll have a story of somebody and be like, a friend.
Then I'm like, what if they listen back and they're like, we're not friends, but I just kind of have this assumption. If we've met and we've talked and you don't specifically hate me, then I consider you a friend.
You're friends with everyone, Abby. I feel that.
It's possible to be friendly with everybody, but I do recognize that they may not feel that same way. But depending on the circumstances that brought you together and what life experiences you shared, maybe it's a deeper friendship more than a fleeting one.
And I guess as we are going to delve into how the world defines friendships, I want to say they're not a bad place to start into a friendship.
But when I think about my lasting friendships, the ones that matter, the ones that I want to preserve, they definitely take on the elements of the characteristics that we just discussed on friendship as defined by the Savior.
So I don't want to specifically say, okay, the way the world defines friendship is Satan's plan and path for friendships.
It's not quite there, but I can definitely see those types of friendships that mirror that relationship would be very manipulative friendships. And like you would say, transactional, you'd be like, I'll be your friend if you give me your lunch money.
That makes sense.
So it's definitely something to consider because this whole talk is meant to be reflective on what kind of relationships we're forming with other people.
Because you're born to a family, there's something there, but let's say, I don't know what's the biggest family you can think of, like 24 kids?
Probably there's more than that. But let's say like a family of five, mom and dad at seven, like those are seven people that are family.
They have to like you eventually in theory. But most of the people we're going to interact with in this life is going to be some form of friendship. You weren't born related.
For sure.
So let's maybe delve into how the world may help how that differs and how the world views friendship. I'll submit the first one.
Like I said before, I think that sometimes they have a conditional backing or their transactional meaning a worldly friendship is oftentimes based because you share interests or mutually benefit like you're going to make a baseball team or volleyball team.
For sure. You're not going to pick me for your volleyball team. We aren't going to be friends because we play volleyball together.
I would be the last person I would pick for a volleyball team. So I'd be like, no, I'm going to have to pass on that.
But you obviously would become friends with a team that you put together that was softball related or whatever, a quilting group, etc.
So anyway, you share an interest, you mutually benefit from each other. It's convenient.
And as life changes and gets busier, maybe that becomes less of a priority than that friendship can often fade in those circumstances.
And you have seasons, which I totally look through and I'm like, oh, that was a great season and now that's over.
I would call those like limited friendships or temporal friendships like this valuable in the time.
But yeah, like you said, your life stages, if you happen to have a couple of kids and none are in school, like you'll make your best friends at the park, like another random parent that's sitting there with their kid at the park.
And you'll make French about it for convenience. But maybe once you leave the park bench, you're never going to see him again.
Or, you know, a year later, you're not spending as much time at the park. And that changes. Right. That season is done.
I would also say centered on personal enjoyment.
Friendship is often viewed as a source of personal happiness, companionship or entertainment rather than as a call to serve or sacrifice.
I've totally said this before, Abby, like I've looked back at different callings that I've been given and that I've accepted.
And I've looked at him and been like, I would never have chosen her to be my friend.
Just if we were just like off the street and she was doing her world and I was doing mine.
However, I'm so grateful that like we met through this calling because she's one of my girls.
Like, I love her. You know what I mean? So I do love that. That it is.
When the Lord comes into things, it changes what would normally be a regular relationship because, yeah, a friendship is normally based on these things.
I would say most friendships really are based on these things.
You're quickly reflecting back to like, for instance, I'm team teaching with a gal and she's wonderful and our lives are busy.
And so I don't know if we would like take time to connect with each other just randomly, like walking buddies or something.
But I adore her and I consider her a friend. And, you know, that's a Sunday thing.
But I would say because of that shared experience and we're teaching this class together and loving these children in a unified way, it quickly jumps into friendship.
It's like he redeems us out of these things. And it's interesting that a calling would do that.
It's right. It's another. It's another reason why you do everything in your power to prepare your life to be able to say yes.
Do take the calling because it may be a friendship that can spark from that that would have never existed otherwise.
That's so good. I would say when I moved to this valley, one of the first friendships that I made was I was four months pregnant and I got called pretty immediately to be in a primary presidency.
And what was interesting is right before that, I was in a primary presidency in the previous ward and the gal I consider a friend.
I had been her camp counselor, like an assistant counselor to her when I was like 20 and she was probably.
No way. Yeah.
And then she she's like, Abby, I know that you guys have accepted a move and you're not going to be here very long, but I know you're supposed to be my counselor.
So I trained under her who had obviously some previous experience, moved to Star Valley, and then I had like maybe four or six weeks in my new ward and got called into that primary presidency.
And I was like, that's great. I had the ability up and running and even amidst being pregnant and new to whatever.
It was a perfect calling. And I would say the president that called me that I served under, I mean, I treasure friendship deeply.
She lives in another state now, but like what a blessing it was because she was my first friend.
And I think she'll be a friend forever for sure. So I love that's happened multiple times for me.
Yes. No shared. Yes. That's so good.
And especially when you're like, you don't really pick your counselors like the Lord picks them and they just have to accept that thing.
And then you see like as you get going, you're like, Oh, I can totally see why you did that.
Totally not because we're identical and we have the same opinion about things and it's just going to be like smooth sailing and we're going to get along in these presidency meetings.
But because it's that kind of relationship that we see that unique gifts come together and interplay and benefit whoever we're serving much better than we could if we all just were cookie cutter, identical looking people.
And there's that mutual respect. Right. Yeah.
This is so great. This is fun to think on.
I would say maybe the last point friendship as defined by the world would be sometimes they're superficial.
Sometimes these earthly friendships maybe exclude others based on differences.
Like there there's a lack of trust. There's a lack of like willingness to sacrifice for each other.
So that it's just like maybe you're like a lunch friend once in a while, but it's not going to go deeper than that. And the things that you're willing to talk about are not things of the heart. Really for sure. Very superficial.
Keep everything close. Yeah.
Okay. So now that we've talked about all of this, I love the way that it was defined friendship defined by the world and by Christ. And we kind of saw where in some points they intersected and where Christ redeemed certain things, right? Certain aspects of friendships as the world would define them.
So in a lesson you would have all these ideas freely shared and then it's just nice to loop back and emphasize the key things that everyone's brought to the table. Yes. Like to write it back down and be like, oh, here's a thread of we all brought this up. We all brought that up and see the similarities.
Or and give some leading because I'll just remind you the question. I actually pulled this question from the study guide aid, which we do link in the show notes. Cool. And you can find on church news.
The question was as simple as how does the Savior's definite friendship differ from the world's definition of friendship? And he only has 15 minutes to get this, his ideas and talks out. Right. Everything that we've been talking about for the last five or seven minutes has been more like what you'll experience in a Relief Society or Elders Quorum lesson as you're sharing ideas and coming up with like what that sparks in you.
And it could take a totally different tangent, but you, you know, if you're preparing for a lesson and using this as a resource, then you might think like this is a direction I want people to really consider at the end of it.
Because I'm already like thinking back to the talk being you are my friends. I'm thinking of that and that talk title is like, he already considers us a friend, but for us to reciprocate that friendship, it requires us to make those bonds in a way that are covenantal and lasting and don't have to necessarily be based on commonalities other than the commonality of loving Jesus Christ.
Right. I totally agree with that.
I did spend this talk kind of thinking about our friendship.
Love it. And I thought like why, like why do we work as friends and you, you do fit like the age parameter of like my, my oldest sister who I'm very good friends with.
And I was thinking maybe those are some of your very, very first friends, but I'm, I think that's true. My, my siblings are my best friends.
Yes, same.
But they weren't born to be my friends necessarily because I don't think we weren't the nicest to each other as kids, but we definitely had a chance to like learn and grow on each other.
And like, they're the first people that I want to loop in as things are happening. You're definitely close like your family now, but I'm like, what, like what made it that way?
And I was thinking back, I think our friendship formed because we did come follow me together.
Agreed. And so we invited me to it.
Trying to get our numbers.
And I accepted.
But it's like, I'm like, okay, Amy's quality. She's like, she's stylish. She's got like an amazing eye for design. She's really great at organizing things. And anyway, I'm like listing this like list of things.
I'm like, those are, those are like not my things. Those are the opposite of my list for myself.
And so I'm like, if I was looking for a cookie cutter, carbon copy of myself, I wouldn't have found you because we aren't on paper. We aren't similar.
Yeah. What we don't, all of our paths don't cross in a lot of ways. In a lot of ways.
But you, but you brought to the table things that I was ready to learn and grow on. And you've had just enough years down there. Like our kids aren't even the same age. We're not homeschooling together. And we're not, we're not like, we don't play sports together.
There's really nothing that should make us friends.
But lucky for me, it worked out that it worked. Well, I think the Lord put you in my path.
When were you my ministry sister? After that?
Yes. And now I'm her ministering sister and I'll be terrible at it compared to her, but it doesn't matter. It's great.
So anyway, I think I kind of got off on a tangent, but this talk did make me stop and think, you know, the friendships that are lasting, we can be hundreds of miles apart and still come to mind often.
Or I'm praying for them or I'm checking in on them. I mean, I guess he makes the point like every relationship could be that special. We could loop people in that way, but there's like common threads what it's going to, what it takes to make friendships lasting.
I love that Abby. Also just sitting in this, you know, in this lesson, if you're someone who's feeling like maybe you don't have friends or maybe you've moved to a new place, you've had to move away from friends or family, whatever it is.
I think having going with a prayer, like an honest prayer in your heart and asking the Lord to maybe show you who your friends are or who they could be.
And then also these are great, great questions on some self-reflection. Like what can I do to be a good friend? You know what I mean?
Because I'm not by nature, I'm not someone who puts myself out there. However, I am happy to accept invitations with certain things.
And then I continue to act on things, but like there's a friend for everybody. There really is.
There's a friend for everybody. And this talk, help, the second half of this talk, I think specifically focuses on those who feel that like loneliness and that desire for friendship.
So good.
But ultimately, Jesus Christ can be our best friend. And a connection with him makes it perfect.
So I would just re-emphasize, like if I'm doing a lesson, we've gone off this tangent on bringing it back by saying the purpose is for the Savior, a friendship for the Savior is, it's about eternal growth, it's about obedience, it's about love.
For the world, it's often the opposite of that. It's often about immediate connection and pleasure instead.
So like we're in for the long game when we're thinking of the Savior's way. Depth of friendship with Christ's friendship, it involves sacrifices and covenant loyalty, whereas worldly friendship can sometimes lack depth and commitment.
And then inclusivity, Christ offers friendship to all, regardless of circumstances, whereas worldly friendship can sometimes be selective and exclusive.
So in this conversation we've had, we'd narrow it down to those quick short points and then give people a chance to just kind of reflect on where they stand.
And like you said, if you're feeling lonely and friendless, you might consider like what kind of, what am I putting out there?
Like how much practice have I put into being a friend to others? Or am I just sitting there waiting for friendships to happen for me?
Right. Not going to happen. So ultimately, the Savior's view of friendship calls us to emulate his love, to serve selflessly and then also to build eternal bonds that transcend worldly definitions.
In an exalting, elevating and eternal way, we can come together seeking both opportunities to unite and a sense of belonging for all that we may be one. We've heard that before.
I love that. So let's think back to the first people that Jesus issued the call to come follow me to.
He collected a very diverse group of individuals, each with something unique to offer. And if you're like me, I quickly think to the chosen.
Maybe they've exaggerated the differences in the apostles, but what comes to mind who he called?
He called fishermen zealots, brothers known for their thunderous personalities. I love that. And even a tax collector. What do they have in common though?
Their belief in the Savior and desire to draw into him united them. They looked at him and they saw God through him.
I also totally thought as I was listening to this talk again, I thought of the chosen and I was like, hey, I know those people. Like, they have a place in my heart.
And I also was just thinking of everyone who's come together to make that film. I gave a prayer of gratitude that they use their gifts in the way they did.
Because I think how many people-
Or develop gifts because of their willingness.
Maybe so.
Because I watched a guy and he was, I don't know if he was a proclaimed atheist, but he like, he learned about Jesus Christ through the filming and as a changed person.
Wonderful.
Because he committed so much to it. Dude, I love that. It's so easy to draw like images about this.
It is.
And the way that the show makes you think it's like all of them stand in awe that he would choose them. But seeing, we might each kind of like see it.
We might see ourselves in a Matthew or might see ourselves in Peter or whatever. And that's what's great is because the diverse collection of people let us see like his friends.
Very diverse.
The ones he loves. Yeah, they're not cookie cutter. And it's not like you have to be just like me to be my friend. You can definitely see those principles that we discussed earlier in application as we consider.
Totally united, that whole group.
In our day when a closeness to the Savior is our ultimate goal, we can experience these higher and holier forms of friendship that transcend the world's view also.
Elder Buckner reflected on how he built these higher and holier relationships fostering unity and drawing from his experience raising his family in New York City.
And I thought it was interesting. He was raised like, I don't know, like an August. He was born in Newtown.
Okay, I didn't know that.
But like by age six, his dad was a mission president in California.
Oh.
And then he lived and raised his family in New York. So what I love about this is, yeah, he does have a background in Utah, but he definitely spent time on both sides of the United States in obviously areas that aren't going to be like, we're all in the same, in this one block.
We're all in the same ward, doing the same thing. It's going to look very different.
I thought he's definitely pulling from experience of making these friendships and these connections with people that are unified in Jesus Christ versus that we have to be like identical communities.
Anyway, he was living in New York. May 2020 comes, COVID-19 hits, and we would all agree in the United States COVID was like, epicenter of COVID was New York City.
Just the best number of people.
He referenced that too.
Yes. He participated in some virtual meetings with other religious leaders from other faiths, like rather than being their enemies because they're not the same faith practice.
Affiliation.
Yeah. They joined. And there were differences, obviously, but despite those differences, they were there to support one another and they focused on, you know, what shared challenges they were having, what opportunities this could bring.
Their prayers and collaborative collaboration brought unity and it inspired service to thousands.
This experience underscored that and in a world often divided, there's far more that unites us.
The Savior's call to be one reminds us of the power of unity and shared purpose.
So, like, just kind of flashback myself to COVID and what experience I thought that brought.
I, in our little valley, I saw that same gift of people unifying during COVID.
And, I don't know, any real life examples come to mind, what lessons we learned about how we can counter divisions and promote unity among friends, among our family, and in the community.
For me, I just had moved here during COVID. And I mean, if you think of it this way, I don't have neighbors that are very close to me, meaning like geographically, and it sort of felt like we moved into a wise place with no one here.
I was like, wow, all the everything closes at like 7 p.m. Like, this is so different.
Anyway, I had an invite to join a Come Follow Me study group with women, and I was kind of amazed that people were still getting together.
We did it outside, but it was amazing. And I wouldn't have known people, Appie, for probably months until we started going back to church.
But because of that, I knew people and it was very nice.
And then when I was called as Young Women's President very shortly after we started going to church again, it was kind of nice because I knew some people.
Other than that, I would have jumped right in. So I was very grateful to have that. That is very different than most people who saw their community, knew their community, and how that worked together.
So I was thinking this is so off of the subject, but I was thinking back to COVID because we didn't have like jobs to get up to. I have two brother-in-laws that are doctors, and so that was a little different.
But we unified. We connected in different ways. I have sisters that are Missouri and Idaho, but we all had Nintendo Switches, and we would get on and play Mario Party together, Mario Kart or whatever.
And I mean, since COVID and our lives have gotten crazy busy, we don't hop on and play Mario Kart.
But I was thinking it was a weird, it could have been a potentially dark time, but there are things that happened during COVID that I look back in fondness,
and I definitely drew strength from family because Zoom was kind of the thing, and we got better at doing that.
Yes, Zoom became a thing.
That to me was when I was looking about the question, like how did we promote unity among our family?
And I also stopped to think about how family can be built in best friends, but if you think about the fighting that maybe happens as you're younger, it doesn't just come naturally.
You do have to work those relationships, and you can let it go either direction. Just because you're born to a certain family doesn't mean that you foster those relationships.
Sometimes the distance can make you go farther apart, but I like valuing, prioritizing those friendships.
You're very close to your sisters, but there's a bit of an age difference.
For sure.
But I don't see that age difference.
Nine years, seven years.
I don't get to know Shelly that much, but Ronna has kind of stamped her flag here in Star Valley, and so I've got to rub shoulders with her.
How much difference is there in age?
Nine years.
That's pretty significant, but when I see you guys together, I'm like, that's just Minnie, me, and me.
Totally.
You two.
We are.
You guys are identical. So I'm guessing that Shelly's part of that mix.
Absolutely.
She finishes the package deal, and so it's a beautiful thing if that potential exists for you and your family, or if you're feeling like your friendships aren't of the caliber that we would say is the way Jesus Christ would consider those friendships.
That would be a great place to start.
I agree.
Those are hopefully, or most likely covenant friendships.
Family ties.
There's covenants, there's family ceilings there. That's a great place to start.
Yes, that is very true.
Rather than looking at people and thinking, man, we're so different, we couldn't be friends, because we've already agreed you and I shouldn't be friends.
But we're going to be anyway.
How can we counter division and promote unity among our friends, among our family, and in the community?
Some things that come to mind is, number one, stop looking for reasons to divide.
That would be the adversary's plan.
And to seek opportunities to be one, that would be the Savior's goal to unite us.
And then also using our unique gifts and attributes that invite learning from one another and then our own personal growth.
Those are all good. When I saw that about bringing our unique gifts to the table, I was...
It made me stop and think. In the talk, he referenced Quentin L. Cook.
He said, the essence of truly belonging is to be one with Christ.
And I was thinking, when I've experienced that in my own life, in this little valley that we live in, there's been deaths, there's been house fires, there's been cancer,
there's been farm accidents, there's been financial hardships.
And I've seen people come together with their unique and individual gifts ready and willing to share in what I experience is a very Christ-like love.
And friendships stem from those hard experiences.
Like just today, an online fundraiser ended.
And our stake president's son is battling cancer.
And a family friend, a stake friend, she organized this online auction.
So people, 250 items were donated and they ranged from horse riding, horse training, vacations, food, crocheted items, blankets.
I like the myriad of talents that come forth. They put their good out there and then people obviously bid on them.
And you know, money is the end-risk goal. It's going to generate money.
But I know for our stake president and his family, way more than that is just the outpouring of love.
And a lot of times people directly know them.
But more often, just the service that their family has provided for our stake for the last decade comes to mind or friend of a friend.
And what you see is like, oh, we're not going to contribute because, you know, you're not one of us.
Like whether the I's and the isms and stuff, it's just a rallying cry.
And so in this particular situation where there's a health challenge at risk or happening, that's been beautiful to see.
I know that it's like brought a lot of like peace and love and joy and hope to this family because they've seen people show what it looks like to unite.
Oh, yeah.
And what like the power that it can create aside from.
I agree. And they have so expressed that.
Yeah.
And I've been moved just listening to them express that. So it makes me so happy to live in a valley that's doing that.
And this is just an example of how our unique gifts and talents that differentiate us in the secular world sometimes can unite us in a sacred space.
So the Savior called us to help one another, to lift one another and edify one another.
And I would say this particular thing is the perfect example of what that looks like.
So this is where I felt like he jumps into the talk to help those who are hearing this message on friendship and are feeling like isolated and friendless.
And like they're really needing something more.
How could we support and encourage others to feel welcome?
The sign on the outside is not enough.
It says visitors welcome.
And both you and I talked about it and said, you know, it would be awesome if it said friends welcome.
Maybe they'll change that.
Maybe so. Do we warmly welcome all who come through the doors?
We must heed the Savior's call to build higher and holier relationships with all of God's children.
And we must live our faith.
There was a good quote when you're talking, sharing this list of how to make others feel welcome.
It said, My father often reminded me that simply sitting in a pew on Sunday doesn't make you a good Christian any more than sleeping in a garage makes you a car.
So yes, we can go up. This ties to the last one.
I was just going to say this fits in the last one with joy.
Attending and worshipping.
Right. You show up and you think your job is just to be there.
But, you know, if you chose to sit with a gal that's like wrestling five kids on her own and you maybe didn't hear so much of the talk, you were not just attending that meeting.
You were worshipping in that meeting because you were making a sacred space for somebody else.
Agreed. I totally agree.
That's an example of how that could look.
Yes.
We must live our life so that the world does not see us that sees him through us.
I highlighted that because I feel like that stands out as an action item.
For sure.
We just question ourselves, are we living our lives in that way or are there some modifications that we can make so that it's about seeing him through us?
Totally. And I mean, this takes place in the grocery store, at the gas pump, school meetings, the neighborhood gatherings.
Essentially, all places where baptized and unbaptized members all work and live.
Uh huh. We each need each other and we all need him.
Elder Buckner stated, Church is a place of gathering and recovery, repair and refocus.
Sounds like a car shop.
That ties into the previous quote. He quoted the prophet. He said, The gospel net is the largest net in the world. God has invited all of us to come to him. There is room for everyone.
Coming to church offers the hope of better days, the promise that you are not alone and a family who needs as much as we need them or who needs us as much as we need them.
Elder D. Todd Christofferson affirms that being one with the Father, Son and Holy Ghost is without doubt the ultimate in belonging.
Oh, I like that.
That was the take home for me when you're that person that's sitting and feeling lonely.
That relationship with those three individuals is such a great starting place.
I was just going to say a starting place, like when you remember what that feels like.
Not an ending place.
I love that, yes.
Because if we're to emulate the Savior and things he did, he had those things going for him. He liked himself. He knew his Father. He learned about his Father from a very young age and he definitely had a great relationship with the Spirit.
But goes past that and then we can see, like in his selection of the apostles, how he goes about making friends.
So good.
He ends with an invitation.
Yes, he said, To any who have stepped away and are seeking a chance to return, I offer an eternal truth and invitation. You belong. Come back. It is time.
And then I felt like some action items.
Yeah.
So we'll finish with those.
Or maybe these came from me, but it doesn't matter. They're at the end of the talk here.
Either way.
I said, consider the net you're casting. And that kind of played off of the quote he shared about the prophet.
Consider the net you're casting. Is there room for everyone? Can you strengthen a relationship with that individual by strengthening your relationship with Jesus Christ?
Another action item. Do you tend to feel isolated and friendless?
Begin by strengthening your relationship with our Savior by looking outside yourself and being his hands.
Ask what more can you contribute in your calling or how can you more diligently fulfill your ministering assignments?
And in this way, you will draw closer to the Savior and these earthly friendships will gradually evolve into the divine kind of love.
And on the off chance that you're listening to me and thinking, you are tone deaf and you don't know what you're talking about, I shared that because I have felt isolated and friendless.
And that is where I started by serving.
I agree.
Making friends, un-assumed friendships.
So coming back, we've already talked about this, but I'm just, I'm telling you this has come by personal experience.
I felt that way too before.
Yeah.
And I've gone to the Lord and said, show me where this can change.
So even though I have ears to hear when people are like, I don't have friends, I don't know how to make friends, I'm like, it starts with work on loving yourself.
It starts on building a relationship with Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ and then it is by way of the way that His gospel and His church run, we immerse ourselves in service and friendships are likely to abound.
Amen, Abby.
And when I look at my ministering list, like I've made one of my best friends, Pam, she's got to be like in her 60s.
Like by age category, we're not raising our children at the same time.
She's definitely got grandchildren my age.
Like she's a friend.
And it's one of those kinds of friendships that wouldn't have been if it hadn't, you know, if I hadn't been lucky enough to be assigned as her minister for a ministering sister for a time.
So anyway, this is personal testimony of mine, the action item.
If that doesn't feel like the one that you want to focus on, that's fine.
I'm sure there's way more that you can delve into in this talk because a lot of it self reflection and a lot of it is considering, you know, how you've made friends in the past and what friendships matter and which ones you want to cultivate more and really expanding the idea of like, technically everybody could be that.
Absolutely.
And why not assess where you are right now with friendship?
I think that's a beautiful thing.
Should I close with this testimony?
Yes, in closing, please do, Abby.
I love to share something from them.
And he said, in a contingence and divided world, I testify that the Savior Jesus Christ is the great unifier.
May I invite each of us to be worthy of the Savior's invitation to be one and boldly declare as he did.
Ye are my friends in his sacred name, Jesus Christ.
Amen.
We'll catch you next time.