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you scared of fossilism? Well, welcome to WSW

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Diet, where we also, if you were warning, we

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use root humor and gross things, violence, drugs,

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and alcohol. portrayals of usages. That's all.

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Okay. Dear warning, use of violence, profanity,

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rude humor, and the portrayal of drug and alcohol

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use. I did much better. Um, don't know about

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that. Welcome to Dummies with Dice, a Dungeons

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& Dragons podcast. No, don't say it! That follows

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three not -so -average dummies of our world again.

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Stuck in a magical storm, transported to... He

00:01:38.060 --> 00:01:40.219
said the inside. World of Dungeons & Dragons

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and bullshit, and blah, blah, blah. Say what

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it's called. What? Amsterdam. Amsterdam? Amsterdam.

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Dungeons & Dragons. All right, so... Question

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of the day. I lost it. All right. If you would

00:02:02.060 --> 00:02:04.760
open up a restaurant, what would you call it?

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Miss Tuna Perfect Restaurant. Do your intro.

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You can do that, yeah. I don't even know what

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I said. Miss Tuna Perfect Restaurant? Well, I'm

00:02:15.280 --> 00:02:17.840
Miss Muffin. You know that because of what I

00:02:17.840 --> 00:02:20.939
just did there. Who plays Miss Muffin? I'm played

00:02:20.939 --> 00:02:24.340
by Kelly Lee. Oh, Kelly Lee. But I'm also Crazy

00:02:24.340 --> 00:02:27.219
Cat Lady Rogan. I'm level nine now. Yeah, we

00:02:27.219 --> 00:02:31.979
are. You are. I'm not. I'm still max level. You

00:02:31.979 --> 00:02:34.159
also can't forget I'm also a half elf. I have

00:02:34.159 --> 00:02:37.699
purple and green hair. I miss my cat. What are

00:02:37.699 --> 00:02:39.219
you calling yourself? Or what are you calling

00:02:39.219 --> 00:02:42.539
your restaurant? Miss Perfect Tuna Shop. Miss

00:02:42.539 --> 00:02:44.360
Perfect Tuna Shop. Okay. I don't know what I

00:02:44.360 --> 00:02:46.680
said. Hey, that's perfect. That's fine. Tuna

00:02:46.680 --> 00:02:49.539
Perfect Tuna Shop. I have lots of cats to feed.

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Hey, Nate here. My character's Duke Crystal.

00:02:54.689 --> 00:02:58.110
He's the drug -addicted level nine barbarian

00:02:58.110 --> 00:03:00.689
of the group. Well, barbarian warlock, I guess.

00:03:01.110 --> 00:03:04.370
Big sexy warlock now. And I'd say Duke's restaurant

00:03:04.370 --> 00:03:08.710
would probably be Rampaging Ramen. Oh, yeah.

00:03:09.449 --> 00:03:14.030
Come back to the anime. He puts hot sausage ramen.

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Rampaging Ramen. A man in these states will have

00:03:16.300 --> 00:03:17.520
to blow your brains out. Yeah, it's demonic,

00:03:17.740 --> 00:03:20.939
please. The hot ramen will actually... We've

00:03:20.939 --> 00:03:23.599
got lawsuits. I can see it coming. I can see

00:03:23.599 --> 00:03:28.280
it coming. It's gonna happen. Hey, everybody.

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Ryan Tucker here at Place Please Stick Sock Jelly.

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I am the hobo trash master, level 9 Claire of

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the God Rumpke. I am the MacGyver of all things

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trash and garbage. What I would name my restaurant?

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Yeah. Fleece sticks, restaurant, ampersand, lodge.

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Fleece sticks, restaurant, ampersand, lodge.

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I was thinking like peanut butter and sock jellies.

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Yeah, that'd be perfect, actually. Proof that

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you don't get your food from the dumpster? No,

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it does. It's got to come from the dumpster.

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That's what makes it good. All right. Oh, I didn't

00:04:06.639 --> 00:04:09.599
do me. My name's Tristan Hayes, and I'm the Dummy

00:04:09.599 --> 00:04:14.000
Master. I understand. done ampersand amsterdam

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no okay so where we left off you guys were hoofing

00:04:19.519 --> 00:04:23.420
it out of the cave temple that was flooding with

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water after looting a bit and i was badass and

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killed a bunch of things after i jumped across

00:04:27.459 --> 00:04:29.500
the table did lots of backflips yeah miss buffett

00:04:29.500 --> 00:04:31.220
was badass after she killed a lot of things and

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did jump some tables and did some backflips uh

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finished off her tauren stuck him a bunch with

00:04:35.319 --> 00:04:38.610
some sneak attacks Duke took a lot of brunt damage.

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We did level up. Everybody leveled up. Twice.

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We're doing big moves and we're heading towards

00:04:43.850 --> 00:04:48.550
big money. So yeah, you guys looted to Torn.

00:04:48.670 --> 00:04:53.689
You got the magic, the second scroll. Don't bite

00:04:53.689 --> 00:04:56.310
my dog. Sorry, I was sharpening my knives. We

00:04:56.310 --> 00:05:00.610
got the second scroll of power that you were

00:05:00.610 --> 00:05:03.009
needing to get back home or open the portal back

00:05:03.009 --> 00:05:06.889
home or of sorts. So you are now outside. The

00:05:06.889 --> 00:05:08.970
temple entrance into the woods. What would you

00:05:08.970 --> 00:05:13.610
guys like to do? Into the woods. Check out this

00:05:13.610 --> 00:05:17.189
scroll. Looking at it. Looking at it. I'm playing

00:05:17.189 --> 00:05:19.230
with my wand. Looking at it. Checking out your

00:05:19.230 --> 00:05:22.670
new wand. Okay. Miss Muffin. That's me. So, since

00:05:22.670 --> 00:05:25.389
you're looking at this scroll, you open it up

00:05:25.389 --> 00:05:28.230
and it's like this Harry Potter style, like the

00:05:28.230 --> 00:05:29.990
picture kind of like animates, comes to life.

00:05:30.009 --> 00:05:32.350
And you're seeing the image kind of drawn on

00:05:32.350 --> 00:05:35.759
there. uh of this super beautiful woman like

00:05:35.759 --> 00:05:38.319
just absolutely stunning most beautiful thing

00:05:38.319 --> 00:05:42.120
you've ever seen um when you kind of look over

00:05:42.120 --> 00:05:43.779
the scroll and you flip it onto the back of the

00:05:43.779 --> 00:05:45.839
side there's some words kind of scribbled onto

00:05:45.839 --> 00:05:50.879
it uh the words say true beauty can't be found

00:05:50.879 --> 00:05:53.240
in youth but it can be found with a little light

00:05:53.240 --> 00:05:57.060
and some wrinkles i have wrinkles that's uh that's

00:05:57.060 --> 00:05:58.620
what you see and then you turn it if you look

00:05:58.620 --> 00:06:00.339
back at the scroll you just see the woman kind

00:06:00.339 --> 00:06:02.800
of just sitting there the image just kind of

00:06:02.800 --> 00:06:06.120
it's like it's like drawn on but alive in a way

00:06:06.120 --> 00:06:08.819
but it's just sitting there yeah magic what would

00:06:08.819 --> 00:06:10.379
you like to do it doesn't nothing happens yet

00:06:10.379 --> 00:06:11.920
like you're not getting like how the first scroll

00:06:11.920 --> 00:06:13.680
you were sucked inside of it and had to do all

00:06:13.680 --> 00:06:16.300
the crazy this you get the sense that this scroll

00:06:16.300 --> 00:06:20.199
hasn't quite unlocked yet you might have to figure

00:06:20.199 --> 00:06:22.879
out a little puzzle put the words and scraps

00:06:22.879 --> 00:06:26.759
on the back sniff it sniff it up through a sniff

00:06:26.759 --> 00:06:30.839
it yeah it smells weird Roll me a Constitution

00:06:30.839 --> 00:06:34.959
check. Arrested. Constitution? Yeah. Roll me

00:06:34.959 --> 00:06:37.879
a Constitution check. 18. 18? Yeah, you sniff

00:06:37.879 --> 00:06:40.519
it, and it smells like whatever the most beautiful

00:06:40.519 --> 00:06:42.500
smell Miss Muffin would smell. It's like you're

00:06:42.500 --> 00:06:45.699
smelling like this. Holy tuna casserole. Cat

00:06:45.699 --> 00:06:48.819
butthole. Cat butthole or tuna casserole. They

00:06:48.819 --> 00:06:52.459
smell the same because they're both awful. No.

00:06:52.779 --> 00:06:55.240
So, yeah, you get this watch, and it's just like

00:06:55.240 --> 00:06:58.420
beautiful smell. So yeah, that's what you get

00:06:58.420 --> 00:07:02.500
from smelling it. Good job. Alright. I don't

00:07:02.500 --> 00:07:06.519
know what to do with it. Well, you've got some

00:07:06.519 --> 00:07:09.240
alluring words on the back that seem to be a

00:07:09.240 --> 00:07:11.939
riddle puzzle of sorts. Yeah, same again. Just

00:07:11.939 --> 00:07:13.660
shine some wrinkles. Are you going to call all

00:07:13.660 --> 00:07:17.360
of your pals? Um, yeah. I'm just yelling, it

00:07:17.360 --> 00:07:19.259
smells like cat ass. He's over there going, check

00:07:19.259 --> 00:07:23.470
out his new wand. No! Don't do that. I made a

00:07:23.470 --> 00:07:26.629
lot of shit run away. All right, guys. Look at

00:07:26.629 --> 00:07:28.529
my scroll. You're just seeing flashes of cones

00:07:28.529 --> 00:07:30.529
of light. Wait, wait, wait. You're just hearing

00:07:30.529 --> 00:07:33.449
squirrels and deers. Wait, wait, wait. This is

00:07:33.449 --> 00:07:37.209
what it looks like. Oh, my dear Jesus. I skip

00:07:37.209 --> 00:07:40.410
over, and I'm like, Felistic, I've got a girlfriend

00:07:40.410 --> 00:07:47.410
for you. Flip the scroll around. Oh, yeah. All

00:07:47.410 --> 00:07:49.329
right. So, Duke, are you coming to look at this

00:07:49.329 --> 00:07:53.220
scroll? Please stay clicking at it. What did

00:07:53.220 --> 00:07:57.420
the scroll say again? On the back it says, True

00:07:57.420 --> 00:08:00.220
beauty can't be found in youth, but it can be

00:08:00.220 --> 00:08:02.139
found with a little light and some wrinkles.

00:08:03.500 --> 00:08:07.939
So maybe... Do I need to fold this thing up and

00:08:07.939 --> 00:08:10.079
shine a light on it? You can try it if you'd

00:08:10.079 --> 00:08:13.879
like. Yeah, let's do that. Okay. So, yeah, I

00:08:13.879 --> 00:08:16.569
mean... uh there's like probably braziers like

00:08:16.569 --> 00:08:19.290
lit outside the temple so you just kind of wrinkle

00:08:19.290 --> 00:08:21.670
it up and like make like the picture all filled

00:08:21.670 --> 00:08:25.290
up so you do that and you see this out the scroll

00:08:25.290 --> 00:08:28.410
just illuminate quick and bright and then i guess

00:08:28.410 --> 00:08:31.430
duke from where you're shooting your wand into

00:08:31.430 --> 00:08:33.690
the trees you just see flea stick and messed

00:08:33.690 --> 00:08:35.970
up and go and get sucked right inside the scroll

00:08:35.970 --> 00:08:40.730
so you can obviously join if you'd like but you

00:08:40.730 --> 00:08:45.139
don't yeah You just walk up and you just see

00:08:45.139 --> 00:08:46.659
like a wrinkled scroll looking at the ground.

00:08:46.779 --> 00:08:48.639
But if you can come up and look at it. I'm going

00:08:48.639 --> 00:08:50.940
to go pick up the scroll. Yeah, so you pick it

00:08:50.940 --> 00:08:52.940
up, you like hold it up and it's still wrinkled

00:08:52.940 --> 00:08:54.779
and you get the light behind it. I pull it tight.

00:08:54.919 --> 00:08:57.080
You pull it tight? Yeah, I pull it tight. Okay.

00:08:57.460 --> 00:08:59.879
Does it do anything? No, it just goes back to

00:08:59.879 --> 00:09:02.139
the beautiful image. I roll it up. We're on all

00:09:02.139 --> 00:09:06.120
the way up? Yes. You bitch. No vibrations, no

00:09:06.120 --> 00:09:07.419
nothing? I mean, we don't know. No, no, they

00:09:07.419 --> 00:09:09.019
don't know anything. They're in like a whole

00:09:09.019 --> 00:09:11.440
other space of reality. Yeah, tell us what's

00:09:11.440 --> 00:09:12.080
happening. I'm going to look around town for

00:09:12.080 --> 00:09:13.500
a minute. Tell us what's happening. What's happening?

00:09:13.700 --> 00:09:15.399
I pretty much know how it works. I kind of saw

00:09:15.399 --> 00:09:16.740
it. Please don't do that. What's happening? We're

00:09:16.740 --> 00:09:19.299
going to go inside the scroll then. Why? All

00:09:19.299 --> 00:09:22.809
right, so. What the fuck did I do here? You know

00:09:22.809 --> 00:09:27.490
I roll. I roll. One man show. Okay, so as you

00:09:27.490 --> 00:09:30.549
drop into this, sucked into the scroll, you both

00:09:30.549 --> 00:09:33.429
kind of land in the same white void that was

00:09:33.429 --> 00:09:35.889
in the first one. So you're just seeing endless

00:09:35.889 --> 00:09:39.669
nothing. I remember very well. You see the image

00:09:39.669 --> 00:09:42.029
of the, once you wrinkled up the picture and

00:09:42.029 --> 00:09:44.309
put the light to it, you see this wrinkled woman.

00:09:45.149 --> 00:09:47.029
Kind of just, you know, far off in the distance

00:09:47.029 --> 00:09:49.070
and she's slowly getting closer and closer until

00:09:49.070 --> 00:09:51.490
the image is like floating in front of you. It's

00:09:51.490 --> 00:09:54.090
just this drawing. Is she wet? Is she from a

00:09:54.090 --> 00:09:56.049
bathtub? No, she's not wet or from a bathtub.

00:09:56.289 --> 00:09:58.629
Okay, we're good. It looks like a drawing. It's

00:09:58.629 --> 00:10:00.450
just getting closer like the drawing is. Is she

00:10:00.450 --> 00:10:03.110
still beautiful? She gets up close to you and...

00:10:03.669 --> 00:10:04.970
Well, I don't know. What do you think beauty

00:10:04.970 --> 00:10:06.889
is? Can it be found in youth? Or is it found

00:10:06.889 --> 00:10:08.789
in wrinkles? It doesn't matter if she has wrinkles.

00:10:09.090 --> 00:10:11.309
I just want to know if she's creepy. Yeah, you

00:10:11.309 --> 00:10:12.970
can't really tell. It's just a drawing now. It's

00:10:12.970 --> 00:10:15.029
just kind of like this drawing of this wrinkled

00:10:15.029 --> 00:10:15.870
little lady. Okay, okay. What does she say? What

00:10:15.870 --> 00:10:18.730
does she say? Okay. She approaches and you hear

00:10:18.730 --> 00:10:20.769
this voice kind of boom out over the thing. And

00:10:20.769 --> 00:10:27.409
she goes, Oh, I see someone has found my scrolls.

00:10:28.610 --> 00:10:31.750
Yes. What do you do? Yes? Yes. She goes, Oh,

00:10:31.769 --> 00:10:37.230
okay. So. So my name is Minerva. I'm assuming

00:10:37.230 --> 00:10:39.509
if you found this scroll, you found the first

00:10:39.509 --> 00:10:43.070
scroll, correct? Yes. Yes. What is your name?

00:10:43.870 --> 00:10:46.769
Moosh Muffin. Moosh Muffin. Okay, nice to meet

00:10:46.769 --> 00:10:49.970
you, Moosh Muffin. I am Minerva. What is your

00:10:49.970 --> 00:10:56.460
name, friend? Please stick. Please stick? Please

00:10:56.460 --> 00:11:00.419
stick. Oh, okay, yes, yes, very good. So, yeah,

00:11:00.500 --> 00:11:02.320
if you found this scroll, you found the first

00:11:02.320 --> 00:11:06.320
scroll, you know that something to do with some

00:11:06.320 --> 00:11:09.860
planar magic. You're wanting to use some realm

00:11:09.860 --> 00:11:11.679
jumping. You're wanting to do some teleporting,

00:11:11.700 --> 00:11:14.740
some real crazy shit. Yeah, get back to home

00:11:14.740 --> 00:11:19.379
shit. I'm what they call a planar witch. Yeah,

00:11:19.460 --> 00:11:24.460
I dabbled in a lot of planar I was doing all

00:11:24.460 --> 00:11:27.960
kinds of teleportations. But these bastards,

00:11:28.080 --> 00:11:30.919
they attacked me in my home. I don't know who

00:11:30.919 --> 00:11:33.899
they are exactly, but... Hooligans. Hooligans.

00:11:34.059 --> 00:11:38.919
God, hooligans. You're damn right. But they attacked

00:11:38.919 --> 00:11:41.559
me, took me, and they tried to drain me of my

00:11:41.559 --> 00:11:45.559
powers. So I implanted the last of my planar

00:11:45.559 --> 00:11:49.340
magic into these scrolls. All of them? All of

00:11:49.340 --> 00:11:52.830
them, baby. All of them. But the last two I have

00:11:52.830 --> 00:11:57.129
hidden. Why? I need to find them. Because they're

00:11:57.129 --> 00:12:00.830
powerful. I need you to come get me, save me,

00:12:00.950 --> 00:12:03.629
so we can get to the last two scrolls and I'll

00:12:03.629 --> 00:12:07.809
help you and your flea stick and moosh muffin.

00:12:08.490 --> 00:12:13.009
I'll help you guys. Well, where is you? I'm about

00:12:13.009 --> 00:12:15.129
to tell you that. I'll give you the coordinates

00:12:15.129 --> 00:12:17.470
to my home and they'll be inscribed upon the

00:12:17.470 --> 00:12:21.679
letter. He has better memories. Okay. She gives

00:12:21.679 --> 00:12:24.279
you the coordinates to the home. His childhood

00:12:24.279 --> 00:12:28.720
memories are far better. So you get there, find

00:12:28.720 --> 00:12:31.340
clues, figure out how they took me, because I

00:12:31.340 --> 00:12:32.799
can't really do anything. This is kind of just

00:12:32.799 --> 00:12:34.720
like a magical bond with the scroll to speak

00:12:34.720 --> 00:12:37.500
to who finds it. So yeah, come find me. Thanks,

00:12:37.559 --> 00:12:40.039
guys. And then she just kind of disappears. And

00:12:40.039 --> 00:12:43.460
Duke Crystal, as you're walking with the scroll,

00:12:43.539 --> 00:12:45.480
you just feel it forcefully open in your hand

00:12:45.480 --> 00:12:47.740
and just spit them out of the scroll, because

00:12:47.740 --> 00:12:51.350
this one's not a fighter. Yeah, so there you

00:12:51.350 --> 00:12:53.990
go. You've got the coordinates to Minerva's home.

00:12:54.049 --> 00:12:56.110
And we came out triple times beautifully. No,

00:12:56.110 --> 00:12:58.110
in the mud. Yeah, in the mud. You fell in the

00:12:58.110 --> 00:13:00.570
mud. There's mud on your face. Gracefully. Gracefully.

00:13:00.690 --> 00:13:03.490
Mud mask is fine. I did one of those superhero

00:13:03.490 --> 00:13:09.850
poses. Roll me a dexterity save. 18. Yeah, you

00:13:09.850 --> 00:13:12.250
do a superhero pose. Good job. You landed out

00:13:12.250 --> 00:13:14.509
of it. Not me. I flopped. Yeah, you really flopped.

00:13:14.509 --> 00:13:16.509
Miss Muffin flopped right into the ground. Okay,

00:13:16.610 --> 00:13:19.350
so. Bada -bop -bam! You got some information.

00:13:19.789 --> 00:13:23.269
You know that Minerva was captured. She's a planar

00:13:23.269 --> 00:13:27.309
witch. Used to teleport to realms. Her magic's

00:13:27.309 --> 00:13:29.169
gone, but she implanted the last of her magic

00:13:29.169 --> 00:13:31.590
and viewed it into these scrolls for some last...

00:13:31.590 --> 00:13:34.149
You know, puff them up if you need some last

00:13:34.149 --> 00:13:37.970
-bit magic. So, you guys need to make your way

00:13:37.970 --> 00:13:39.809
to her home or do what you want. If you want

00:13:39.809 --> 00:13:43.090
to go back to Ironspine to do some rest up and

00:13:43.090 --> 00:13:44.850
some talks or whatever you want to do. You know,

00:13:44.870 --> 00:13:47.710
good... resting shit. I don't know. Whatever

00:13:47.710 --> 00:13:50.009
you want to do. I'm inspired to get people to

00:13:50.009 --> 00:13:54.629
help us. Tell our people they have to help us.

00:13:54.629 --> 00:13:59.690
I'm down to go for a long rest. Okay. So, make

00:13:59.690 --> 00:14:04.309
me make me a survival check. All of you. All

00:14:04.309 --> 00:14:06.809
of y 'all? All of you. To group one. All together.

00:14:07.990 --> 00:14:13.309
So, over half have to succeed. Eleven. Fifteen.

00:14:15.740 --> 00:14:17.620
12. Okay, that's good enough because you guys

00:14:17.620 --> 00:14:20.980
have been kind of moving around this area for

00:14:20.980 --> 00:14:22.840
a good while now. Yeah, we know what's up. We're

00:14:22.840 --> 00:14:26.200
smart. Yeah, well, yeah. So yeah, you guys start

00:14:26.200 --> 00:14:28.120
moving through and you're making your way through

00:14:28.120 --> 00:14:30.100
the trees and through the woods and through some

00:14:30.100 --> 00:14:31.759
little trails and shit and you make your way

00:14:31.759 --> 00:14:34.860
back upon Iron Spine Keep. You come back and

00:14:34.860 --> 00:14:36.840
you see the whole fortress kind of still there.

00:14:36.879 --> 00:14:39.200
You see your guards up top with arrows. You see

00:14:39.200 --> 00:14:41.539
them with magic and you hear one yell out. He's

00:14:41.539 --> 00:14:47.039
like, open it up! and uh you guys are able to

00:14:47.039 --> 00:14:53.620
enter the iron spine key um who was the chick

00:14:53.620 --> 00:14:58.519
corley corley was her name i was gonna say is

00:14:58.519 --> 00:15:00.860
it caroline corley yeah corley was the one that

00:15:00.860 --> 00:15:02.740
was kind of running the place for you guys so

00:15:02.740 --> 00:15:05.659
corley you see her she comes up and she's like

00:15:05.659 --> 00:15:09.139
looking tired like she is exhausted because she's

00:15:09.139 --> 00:15:10.980
just been fucking running around and she goes

00:15:10.980 --> 00:15:15.169
oh my god You guys? You're back? Holy shit. I

00:15:15.169 --> 00:15:18.409
have something to tell you. Yes? You know your

00:15:18.409 --> 00:15:23.149
green friend? Globogul? Yeah. So, you guys, you

00:15:23.149 --> 00:15:25.570
know, he stays here to kind of protect and defend.

00:15:25.690 --> 00:15:30.450
He took that job extremely serious. I'm actually

00:15:30.450 --> 00:15:32.610
saying this. You hear from, like, a distance.

00:15:32.909 --> 00:15:36.230
You hear Globogul's voice, and he's like, Whoa,

00:15:36.509 --> 00:15:40.580
do I hear my bros? Do I hear my bros? And he

00:15:40.580 --> 00:15:42.580
comes running around the corner, but, like, instead

00:15:42.580 --> 00:15:45.340
of the normal square, like, globogul, you see,

00:15:45.379 --> 00:15:47.539
like, a thinner. Like, he's, like, toned. He's,

00:15:47.559 --> 00:15:49.940
like, got this, like, thick figure to his body.

00:15:50.360 --> 00:15:52.200
He's sculpted. So he comes around the corner.

00:15:52.259 --> 00:15:55.159
He goes, I have been working out, Duke. He almost

00:15:55.159 --> 00:15:57.659
resembles, like, you. Like, he almost kind of

00:15:57.659 --> 00:15:59.820
resembles, like, your shape in a way, but with

00:15:59.820 --> 00:16:02.399
still, like... Big square, like Minecraft shoulders.

00:16:02.720 --> 00:16:04.460
Nice. Like, you know, he's got like the blockiness.

00:16:04.679 --> 00:16:07.399
But yeah, he's working out. He's been taking

00:16:07.399 --> 00:16:08.899
the job very seriously. He's got to have a cubic

00:16:08.899 --> 00:16:11.860
shape a little bit. So Corley's like, yeah, there's,

00:16:11.860 --> 00:16:14.960
yeah, Glabagool's, he's taking shapes. He's Minecraft.

00:16:15.100 --> 00:16:17.460
But he's taking his job very seriously. So he

00:16:17.460 --> 00:16:20.360
kills everything that comes near this fortress.

00:16:20.720 --> 00:16:25.240
Everything. He's given us animals, but most of

00:16:25.240 --> 00:16:27.799
them are covered in his goo, which is not edible.

00:16:28.269 --> 00:16:30.269
We need to scrape that off. No, no, no. It just

00:16:30.269 --> 00:16:32.509
melted away, mostly. It just kind of is gone

00:16:32.509 --> 00:16:34.570
by the time he spits it out. But he's trying,

00:16:34.769 --> 00:16:37.789
so I appreciate that. So we love having him here.

00:16:38.009 --> 00:16:41.730
But just wanted you to be aware of his transformation.

00:16:42.029 --> 00:16:44.909
I'll talk to him. I'll talk to him. So, yeah,

00:16:44.970 --> 00:16:46.269
Galapagos kind of walks out. He goes, what do

00:16:46.269 --> 00:16:48.929
you think, dude? What do you think, bro? I think

00:16:48.929 --> 00:16:50.769
you look fucking great. Yeah, I fucking look

00:16:50.769 --> 00:16:53.730
great. And you see him like... just like jam

00:16:53.730 --> 00:16:55.529
a little bit harder you see like a little bowl

00:16:55.529 --> 00:16:58.169
just kind of pops up he goes see that i'm growing

00:16:58.169 --> 00:17:07.650
a dick you're right duke does wear pants yeah

00:17:07.650 --> 00:17:12.109
you should too i'll work on that find you a girl

00:17:12.109 --> 00:17:15.549
yes if only there was a girl glob of ghoul if

00:17:15.549 --> 00:17:18.599
only there was a female intelligent Can't you

00:17:18.599 --> 00:17:20.700
just make the Glabba Glabba Glabba Glabba? I

00:17:20.700 --> 00:17:23.059
might be able to make one. Glabba's cube like

00:17:23.059 --> 00:17:28.220
me. Yes. Glabba girl. Glabba girl. Yeah. I have

00:17:28.220 --> 00:17:33.059
a sailage. You don't like my cat cows? He goes,

00:17:33.079 --> 00:17:36.400
you know what, dude? That's a good idea. And

00:17:36.400 --> 00:17:39.000
he just starts, like, squishing away and, like,

00:17:39.000 --> 00:17:40.559
moving quickly and goes through the gates of

00:17:40.559 --> 00:17:42.279
the front gate and, like, disappears into the

00:17:42.279 --> 00:17:45.579
woods. He's got a quest. He's fun. He does. He

00:17:45.579 --> 00:17:47.279
probably likes to go on his own quest. Now, I

00:17:47.279 --> 00:17:51.000
tell everyone, hunt now. Yeah, now's your chance.

00:17:51.920 --> 00:17:54.480
So, clearly, yeah, here's that. She's like, you're

00:17:54.480 --> 00:17:56.779
right. Okay, hunt. Everyone, hunt. You see, like,

00:17:56.799 --> 00:17:59.319
soldiers just, like, instantly start running.

00:17:59.380 --> 00:18:01.200
They're like, oh, fuck. They're grabbing bows.

00:18:01.400 --> 00:18:03.700
I meant to tell him before he left that, like,

00:18:03.700 --> 00:18:07.099
when he was hunting, to just try to melt their

00:18:07.099 --> 00:18:10.279
head yeah and leave the body carry them yeah

00:18:10.279 --> 00:18:12.240
that way they can come they can come pick up

00:18:12.240 --> 00:18:14.460
the body and he just tell him about it next time

00:18:14.460 --> 00:18:17.160
maybe when he comes back he's on a quest so yes

00:18:17.160 --> 00:18:19.779
you got an idea yeah tell him i said that if

00:18:19.779 --> 00:18:22.039
you know if he comes back yeah of course a couple

00:18:22.039 --> 00:18:24.059
weeks from now of course i'm just glad we can

00:18:24.059 --> 00:18:27.920
have a moment to breathe uh yes so yeah uh you

00:18:27.920 --> 00:18:30.160
guys what are you guys doing you guys have you

00:18:30.160 --> 00:18:32.500
we have a quest you have a quest what's your

00:18:32.500 --> 00:18:37.759
quest Well, flea stick has information. Flea

00:18:37.759 --> 00:18:42.460
stick, what's your information? This witch lady.

00:18:44.339 --> 00:18:48.259
Scrolls. Oh, you got one of your other scrolls?

00:18:48.299 --> 00:18:52.119
Yep, exactly. Okay, well, that's great. I mean,

00:18:52.160 --> 00:18:57.519
that's great for you guys. So what's next? Coordinates.

00:18:57.759 --> 00:18:59.869
Coordinates. Oh, you've got the coordinates?

00:19:00.150 --> 00:19:03.450
Yes. Okay, well, can I... Well, we'll write this

00:19:03.450 --> 00:19:04.730
down. She's going to take them and she's going

00:19:04.730 --> 00:19:07.289
to go study those for a bit and try to get back

00:19:07.289 --> 00:19:09.990
with you on a better direction. Since you're

00:19:09.990 --> 00:19:11.309
able to come back and give her... Hell yeah.

00:19:11.750 --> 00:19:15.750
Now we go to the kitchen and we make tuna. Yeah,

00:19:15.789 --> 00:19:17.730
so I'd say if you guys want for the night, you

00:19:17.730 --> 00:19:20.789
can take your time to do what you want for the

00:19:20.789 --> 00:19:22.890
night before you begin your long rest. I've got

00:19:22.890 --> 00:19:25.170
to go find an old girl. Old girl? The one we

00:19:25.170 --> 00:19:28.470
were just talking to. Okay, yeah. I ask her how

00:19:28.470 --> 00:19:31.990
our coffers are looking. Her coffers? Our coffers.

00:19:32.569 --> 00:19:35.049
Is that what a coffer is? It's a bank. It's pretty

00:19:35.049 --> 00:19:41.170
much our accounts. She goes, so after the fancy

00:19:41.170 --> 00:19:44.329
little circus magic traders left, word did spread,

00:19:44.450 --> 00:19:47.049
so we have gained a little bit, but we don't

00:19:47.049 --> 00:19:49.630
have much to sell. We don't have much economy

00:19:49.630 --> 00:19:55.670
going here. People still need paid. There's 500

00:19:55.670 --> 00:19:58.730
gold. For upgrades and payments. Oh, okay. Hell

00:19:58.730 --> 00:20:01.789
yeah. That'll work. That'll be great. I'm pretty

00:20:01.789 --> 00:20:04.170
sure... Yeah, I'll keep holding on to this and

00:20:04.170 --> 00:20:07.690
I will make some phone... Well, fuck. I about

00:20:07.690 --> 00:20:11.630
said phone calls. I'll make some... What the

00:20:11.630 --> 00:20:13.490
fuck do they do? Send some letters. Owl message.

00:20:13.490 --> 00:20:15.650
I'll send an owl message. Or I'll send a letter

00:20:15.650 --> 00:20:17.789
of owl message. A courier message. A courier.

00:20:17.990 --> 00:20:19.750
There's the word I'm looking for. I will send

00:20:19.750 --> 00:20:23.569
a courier to fetch some people and see what we

00:20:23.569 --> 00:20:24.089
can get back with us. What's wrong with using

00:20:24.089 --> 00:20:27.690
pigeons? Maybe it's a pigeon courier. Courier

00:20:27.690 --> 00:20:31.769
pigeon. Miss Muffin, you're not here. What are

00:20:31.769 --> 00:20:34.809
you doing listening from the shadows? I came

00:20:34.809 --> 00:20:38.869
to give you also money. Oh, you did? How much

00:20:38.869 --> 00:20:42.630
money do you have? Probably more than me. I'm

00:20:42.630 --> 00:20:47.109
not always paying. My question is more so how

00:20:47.109 --> 00:20:50.099
much you going to need? Well, I mean, I'll take

00:20:50.099 --> 00:20:51.380
as much as... That's not how generosity works.

00:20:51.380 --> 00:20:53.519
I'll take as much as anyone can spare, really.

00:20:53.579 --> 00:20:55.180
That's not how generosity works. You don't have

00:20:55.180 --> 00:20:57.319
the set price that you need. If you're saying

00:20:57.319 --> 00:20:58.779
you want to have a... The more, the merrier.

00:20:59.019 --> 00:21:03.859
So, if you're wanting to have a upgrade to our

00:21:03.859 --> 00:21:07.200
facilities, like you want to build on a new room

00:21:07.200 --> 00:21:10.619
to build something new, it's going to probably

00:21:10.619 --> 00:21:14.099
cost you around $5 ,500, $2 ,000. I don't care

00:21:14.099 --> 00:21:17.160
about no building rooms. She's broke. She's broke.

00:21:17.220 --> 00:21:19.640
What do you mean? She's worried about how much

00:21:19.640 --> 00:21:20.960
she gets paid. Well, I was eavesdropping and

00:21:20.960 --> 00:21:22.900
I heard, did Crystal say we pay people around

00:21:22.900 --> 00:21:25.039
here? So, is $500 enough to pay everybody? I

00:21:25.039 --> 00:21:28.279
think Duke gave her money to kind of... To, like,

00:21:28.319 --> 00:21:31.039
take care of upkeep and to keep the guards paid

00:21:31.039 --> 00:21:33.579
so they don't quit and leave. So, it's more like

00:21:33.579 --> 00:21:36.819
a... Well, and if there's some extra for upgrades,

00:21:37.180 --> 00:21:38.660
I mean, we could make the place a little nicer

00:21:38.660 --> 00:21:41.599
and more appealing. But if Bobagul's going to

00:21:41.599 --> 00:21:44.480
kill any nearby traveler wanting to do trade,

00:21:44.680 --> 00:21:46.529
then... There's really no point in doing too

00:21:46.529 --> 00:21:48.329
many upgrades for appearance. So if you're wanting

00:21:48.329 --> 00:21:50.910
to just donate money for the payment of guards,

00:21:51.049 --> 00:21:54.170
you can as much as you want. Which, I'll actually

00:21:54.170 --> 00:21:57.450
tell you, I said only kill travelers who are

00:21:57.450 --> 00:22:01.910
aggressive. Hostile? Yes. If they unsheath their

00:22:01.910 --> 00:22:03.630
weapon. We'll tell them that you said that, because

00:22:03.630 --> 00:22:05.049
that's the thing that gets them to listen, is

00:22:05.049 --> 00:22:06.930
when we tell them that you said it. Sometimes

00:22:06.930 --> 00:22:08.609
we don't like to say that you didn't say it if

00:22:08.609 --> 00:22:10.569
you did say it, or if you didn't say it, because...

00:22:10.940 --> 00:22:12.500
We don't want to be lying to him and then him

00:22:12.500 --> 00:22:14.700
kill us all. And tell him I said that honorable

00:22:14.700 --> 00:22:18.000
heroes are always the most shredded. That will

00:22:18.000 --> 00:22:20.279
probably do well. It'll suck for all of us because

00:22:20.279 --> 00:22:24.519
he's very loud. But, well, it's great. We'll

00:22:24.519 --> 00:22:26.960
appreciate it longer. You want loud and alive

00:22:26.960 --> 00:22:31.629
or quiet and dead? There you go. True. Yes. I

00:22:31.629 --> 00:22:33.750
figured my shit out. I really want to know if

00:22:33.750 --> 00:22:36.089
you just run the kitchen or you make sure all

00:22:36.089 --> 00:22:39.789
the food's all stocked up. Yeah, we try to hunt.

00:22:39.910 --> 00:22:42.109
How much would it cost to have a kitchen upgrade?

00:22:42.690 --> 00:22:45.589
That's what she says. That's about $1 ,000 for

00:22:45.589 --> 00:22:48.190
a kitchen upgrade. $1 ,000 gold or silver? I'll

00:22:48.190 --> 00:22:50.410
give you $1 ,000 for a kitchen upgrade. Really?

00:22:50.509 --> 00:22:57.210
Okay. Sure. Since she's only going to spend money

00:22:57.210 --> 00:22:59.930
on shit she likes, I guess. Everyone needs money.

00:22:59.849 --> 00:23:05.710
to eat around here. All of our workers. I don't

00:23:05.710 --> 00:23:10.390
care about upgrading. Tell me what you want and

00:23:10.390 --> 00:23:13.130
I will express how good. I've been trying. Do

00:23:13.130 --> 00:23:16.650
it. I just wanted to give you money so we don't

00:23:16.650 --> 00:23:18.750
get low on food. You can send people out to get

00:23:18.750 --> 00:23:20.450
food. You can make sure the kitchen's running.

00:23:20.609 --> 00:23:23.309
Make sure everything's going swell. So you don't

00:23:23.309 --> 00:23:25.690
need money for just general keeping the kitchen

00:23:25.690 --> 00:23:29.359
running. Pay a chef. Here's a thousand dollars.

00:23:29.519 --> 00:23:32.839
Thank you. I'll take a thousand. Why that is

00:23:32.839 --> 00:23:35.900
so generous. I'm sure the most basic recipes

00:23:35.900 --> 00:23:38.940
we know from the real world are far better than

00:23:38.940 --> 00:23:42.779
any chef's recipes in those days. Like a grilled

00:23:42.779 --> 00:23:44.619
cheese would probably knock their fucking socks

00:23:44.619 --> 00:23:47.240
off. A grilled cheese indeed. Do you give it

00:23:47.240 --> 00:23:50.460
to a fucking elf? Just finding butter to put

00:23:50.460 --> 00:23:52.460
on the bread. That's what I'm thinking. Like,

00:23:52.500 --> 00:23:55.160
if our kitchen gets bare and we have all these

00:23:55.160 --> 00:23:57.299
people and Gobblegull's been killing all this

00:23:57.299 --> 00:23:58.460
shit. Well, then maybe you should spend some

00:23:58.460 --> 00:24:01.859
time teaching them modern cooking. It could be

00:24:01.859 --> 00:24:04.920
basic shit. I literally just gave her money to

00:24:04.920 --> 00:24:07.839
get us a chef and food. Okay, that's fine. That

00:24:07.839 --> 00:24:09.519
chef's going to know how to make fucking stew.

00:24:09.519 --> 00:24:14.440
I will say, with $1 ,000, you can get a chef

00:24:14.440 --> 00:24:18.160
that will be able to cook and not... So poorly

00:24:18.160 --> 00:24:20.920
will not be as exhausted as well. So he will

00:24:20.920 --> 00:24:28.220
make porridge. 1 ,475 copper pieces. I don't

00:24:28.220 --> 00:24:30.339
know what that translates to, but I melt that

00:24:30.339 --> 00:24:34.380
shit. I will take it. That's what you're giving.

00:24:35.359 --> 00:24:39.339
Oh, that is a, yeah, that is some money. That's

00:24:39.339 --> 00:24:41.539
like, that's like 200, not even, that's like

00:24:41.539 --> 00:25:00.490
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00:25:00.529 --> 00:25:02.990
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00:25:51.299 --> 00:25:55.819
discount code. Thank you, W Energy. Okay, so

00:25:55.819 --> 00:25:59.980
you guys, Ms. Muffin gave... Give me electric.

00:26:00.140 --> 00:26:02.920
Give me electric. Ms. Muffin gave 1 ,000 gold

00:26:02.920 --> 00:26:06.079
to hire a chef and kind of get some general chefery

00:26:06.079 --> 00:26:10.059
going. The dude gave 500 gold to pay off the

00:26:10.059 --> 00:26:13.000
guards and just do some general upkeep. Felicity

00:26:13.000 --> 00:26:15.819
gave 1 ,400 copper pieces, which resulted in

00:26:15.819 --> 00:26:18.839
what? 10? 10 gold pieces. 10 gold pieces. Hell

00:26:18.839 --> 00:26:21.579
yeah. To help with the bunch. Thank you, Felicity.

00:26:21.579 --> 00:26:25.119
But that's fine. So anything else you guys want

00:26:25.119 --> 00:26:30.420
to do after you're done with the Corley? Don't

00:26:30.420 --> 00:26:31.519
we need a long rest before we go on? Maybe put

00:26:31.519 --> 00:26:34.319
some morale under the guards, walk around, you

00:26:34.319 --> 00:26:39.519
know, chest out. Give me a charisma check. Shit.

00:26:40.079 --> 00:26:42.599
Walk around like Johnny Rama. Advantage because

00:26:42.599 --> 00:26:44.980
I'm like legendary? Yeah, actually with advantage

00:26:44.980 --> 00:26:47.539
because you are a non -legendary leader around

00:26:47.539 --> 00:26:49.240
here. Thank goodness because that was a bad roll.

00:26:50.919 --> 00:26:54.140
I'll take the performance. It might be performance

00:26:54.140 --> 00:26:56.960
if you have anything. 19. Okay, 19. Yeah, that's

00:26:56.960 --> 00:27:00.039
good enough chest puffing. Walk around. You see

00:27:00.039 --> 00:27:03.420
some guards, they're kind of like, I'm so tired

00:27:03.420 --> 00:27:05.839
and hungry. That green guy is gone. I can finally

00:27:05.839 --> 00:27:08.099
breathe and not listen to him pumping iron all

00:27:08.099 --> 00:27:10.519
the time. And I see you walk by and you're just

00:27:10.519 --> 00:27:13.059
like, oh, there's... Giving them head nods. Yeah,

00:27:13.059 --> 00:27:15.319
oh my God, he nodded at me. That's Duke Crystal.

00:27:15.420 --> 00:27:17.039
And they stand up a little straighter and you

00:27:17.039 --> 00:27:19.750
feel they get a little brighter. So yeah, good

00:27:19.750 --> 00:27:24.829
job. It's payday today. It's like Spongebob stage.

00:27:25.529 --> 00:27:27.390
Spongebob goes out and they're all like, oh yeah,

00:27:27.529 --> 00:27:30.150
woohoo. Then Ms. Muffin comes around and they're

00:27:30.150 --> 00:27:32.029
like, what the? They're like, who the fuck is

00:27:32.029 --> 00:27:33.630
that? This bitch ate all the good food. Why is

00:27:33.630 --> 00:27:35.470
she hiding in the shadows? Every time she shows

00:27:35.470 --> 00:27:36.690
up, she eats all the good food. Why is she just

00:27:36.690 --> 00:27:39.109
following Duke around in the dark, waiting for

00:27:39.109 --> 00:27:41.569
him to have conversations with people? What is

00:27:41.569 --> 00:27:45.670
wrong with her? I don't trust him. I mean. I

00:27:45.670 --> 00:27:48.019
mean. It's picture like knocking shit over to

00:27:48.019 --> 00:27:51.640
like not stealthy at all. No, I'm still she's

00:27:51.640 --> 00:27:55.779
got a visibility clip Okay, so yeah, that's that's

00:27:55.779 --> 00:28:02.619
good use Anything else keep her going? Starting

00:28:02.619 --> 00:28:06.000
to get a little bit darker getting it she it

00:28:06.000 --> 00:28:13.220
she killed hand Slay something. Yeah Okay, so

00:28:13.220 --> 00:28:18.529
okay, I'll say Um, with... No. I can see anything.

00:28:18.569 --> 00:28:20.390
I can see in the dark. He's got devil sight.

00:28:20.470 --> 00:28:22.890
I can fly if I want to. With the new level up,

00:28:22.890 --> 00:28:25.150
he's got devil sight. What are you, level three

00:28:25.150 --> 00:28:28.869
warlock now? Is that what it is? Yeah. So, as

00:28:28.869 --> 00:28:31.730
the night's coming to an end, and the sun has

00:28:31.730 --> 00:28:35.990
gone down, you guys are in the kitchen area after

00:28:35.990 --> 00:28:39.170
hiring... No, no, no, no. As the night's coming

00:28:39.170 --> 00:28:42.250
to an end, and the sun goes down. Which one is

00:28:42.250 --> 00:28:46.180
it? You're ending. Miss Muffin's freaking out.

00:28:46.480 --> 00:28:49.980
Wait, does that say night comes to an end? As

00:28:49.980 --> 00:28:54.660
day comes to an end and the sun goes down. You

00:28:54.660 --> 00:28:57.220
guys are kind of galloping in the kitchen, doing

00:28:57.220 --> 00:28:59.180
your nightly munching and eating and whatnot.

00:28:59.880 --> 00:29:01.619
Standing in corners, hiding, whatever you're

00:29:01.619 --> 00:29:06.039
doing. You're standing there. Roll me a... Where

00:29:06.039 --> 00:29:07.579
are you guys standing? How are you guys positioned

00:29:07.579 --> 00:29:09.660
in the kitchen? Doing a cake stand. You're doing

00:29:09.660 --> 00:29:11.480
a cake stand? So you're upside down? I need to

00:29:11.480 --> 00:29:14.099
get to the counter. Okay, so like on the bar

00:29:14.099 --> 00:29:16.240
of the counter, like there's a K, right there

00:29:16.240 --> 00:29:18.240
next to the bar. That's a big one on the ground.

00:29:18.519 --> 00:29:19.960
That's what I was going to say. It's on the ground.

00:29:20.000 --> 00:29:22.200
It's going to be upside down. Where are you at,

00:29:22.240 --> 00:29:24.720
Felicity? You holding his legs? Yeah, supporting.

00:29:25.140 --> 00:29:27.380
So yeah, where are you at? Laying across the

00:29:27.380 --> 00:29:29.980
bar, watching. Okay, so you guys are all across

00:29:29.980 --> 00:29:32.920
the bar of this building, and you see like this

00:29:32.920 --> 00:29:36.420
fissure just kind of like kind of sparking in

00:29:36.420 --> 00:29:38.920
the middle of the room, and you see a hand come

00:29:38.920 --> 00:29:41.869
out. And you see another hand come out. And you

00:29:41.869 --> 00:29:44.230
just see the... I don't remember what she was

00:29:44.230 --> 00:29:45.650
called or what we called her. The genie woman.

00:29:45.849 --> 00:29:48.750
The genie woman. She kind of, like, pops out.

00:29:49.230 --> 00:29:52.190
You remember you asked her for two weapons and,

00:29:52.250 --> 00:29:56.569
I think, to bring back your cat? Yeah. So, you

00:29:56.569 --> 00:30:02.710
see this... No. You see this woman flop out of

00:30:02.710 --> 00:30:05.789
this portal and she is... Badly damaged like

00:30:05.789 --> 00:30:09.410
her like bleeding but barely it's her healing

00:30:09.410 --> 00:30:13.890
I'm gonna heal her with a spell. Oh, yeah. Hell.

00:30:13.950 --> 00:30:19.730
Yeah Your wounds or something? Yeah, okay. Yeah,

00:30:19.829 --> 00:30:22.309
which one are you what are you doing spell so

00:30:22.309 --> 00:30:26.769
ice? Level wise I mean for the healing I'd be

00:30:26.769 --> 00:30:31.680
selfless you'll region Yeah, that'd save her

00:30:31.680 --> 00:30:33.740
from anything. Yeah, it would, definitely. What

00:30:33.740 --> 00:30:36.819
is it? Regen scroll. The one that'll save an

00:30:36.819 --> 00:30:41.079
arm if you lose one. She flops out of here while

00:30:41.079 --> 00:30:44.079
you guys are deciding. She's a genie. She's curled

00:30:44.079 --> 00:30:47.660
up. You see that she's holding things in her

00:30:47.660 --> 00:30:51.099
arms. She's grasping shit in between her, holding

00:30:51.099 --> 00:30:53.920
it to her chest, but she's curled up laying on

00:30:53.920 --> 00:30:57.680
top of it. What do you do as you guys all see

00:30:57.680 --> 00:31:01.099
this happen? Well, he's going to cure her, and

00:31:01.099 --> 00:31:03.279
I'm going to help her. I'm just holding her and

00:31:03.279 --> 00:31:06.180
getting the shit out of her arms. Is my cat there?

00:31:08.559 --> 00:31:14.200
That shit ain't meowing. So, you kind of come

00:31:14.200 --> 00:31:15.619
down and check on her, Ms. Muffin, since you

00:31:15.619 --> 00:31:19.259
are able to reach up and grab her and stuff.

00:31:19.299 --> 00:31:23.160
You roll her over, and you see a sword in her

00:31:23.160 --> 00:31:28.180
hand and this little statue in her hand. I love

00:31:28.180 --> 00:31:33.819
you. What? You see Hazel's paw in her hand. Like,

00:31:33.819 --> 00:31:37.279
just the paw. Like, holding in her hand. And

00:31:37.279 --> 00:31:41.220
you roll her over, and she said, I'm sorry. They

00:31:41.220 --> 00:31:45.079
are insane. They're so powerful. You see, I got

00:31:45.079 --> 00:31:47.240
a hold of her, and the next thing I know, the

00:31:47.240 --> 00:31:48.920
portal's opening, and I'm being kicked through

00:31:48.920 --> 00:31:51.940
it, and her arm's with me, and... Now her paw's

00:31:51.940 --> 00:31:54.039
with me and her body's not, so I don't know.

00:31:54.259 --> 00:31:56.279
We have to go back. I don't know what. We have

00:31:56.279 --> 00:31:58.400
to go back and get her. You got a piece of her?

00:31:58.480 --> 00:32:01.960
Three legs. She still has three legs. If you're

00:32:01.960 --> 00:32:03.660
lucky, it's a dimensional cut. She kind of just

00:32:03.660 --> 00:32:07.039
goes limp and drops their arms over and the paw

00:32:07.039 --> 00:32:09.460
falls. Cure her. Make her feel better. Hopefully

00:32:09.460 --> 00:32:13.460
dimensional cuts don't bleed. Maybe. Or they

00:32:13.460 --> 00:32:14.819
bleed really badly. Are you going to heal her?

00:32:14.980 --> 00:32:20.079
I don't know. Yeah, with a second level prayer

00:32:20.079 --> 00:32:22.849
of healing. I think that heals everybody. Yeah,

00:32:22.950 --> 00:32:26.710
it does. Good! She's holding my cat's ball. It'll

00:32:26.710 --> 00:32:32.289
heal my cat, too. Poor thing. The cat regenerates

00:32:32.289 --> 00:32:35.089
from the ball. That would be insane. I figured

00:32:35.089 --> 00:32:38.029
the other way around. Well, it touched the ball.

00:32:38.230 --> 00:32:43.289
So it would copy. I'd say you make an armor.

00:32:43.450 --> 00:32:45.670
Give me a hundred regent scrolls and I'm just

00:32:45.670 --> 00:32:48.049
going to start cutting fingers off. Regrowing

00:32:48.049 --> 00:32:50.619
people. You're like my one -fingered army. Alright,

00:32:50.740 --> 00:32:53.180
so, Cure Wounds. It's like they're almost as

00:32:53.180 --> 00:32:56.420
one -fingered. Yeah. Second. Second? It'd be

00:32:56.420 --> 00:32:58.160
like Assassin's Creed. See if it's enough to

00:32:58.160 --> 00:33:01.059
actually bring her from the brink of death. That's

00:33:01.059 --> 00:33:03.500
what Assassin's Creed was doing. 1d8 plus your

00:33:03.500 --> 00:33:09.839
spellcasting. So, 1d8 plus your wisdom. And then

00:33:09.839 --> 00:33:24.319
it says regain 2d8 plus 9 hit points. So you

00:33:24.319 --> 00:33:26.640
would get that plus, so it would be 2, whatever,

00:33:26.819 --> 00:33:31.140
the 2d8 plus 5. Alright, roll that for me. My

00:33:31.140 --> 00:33:33.839
cash. As you press your dirty, stinky, rucky

00:33:33.839 --> 00:33:39.579
hands. Roll up. I'm keeping the ball. 7, so 8

00:33:39.579 --> 00:33:46.539
plus 5, so 13. 13? Okay, so you lay your, oh,

00:33:46.599 --> 00:33:49.809
more? Don't I get to roll for my own health?

00:33:49.910 --> 00:33:51.730
Oh yeah, I think you get some back. I think it's

00:33:51.730 --> 00:33:55.390
like 2 plus your... 2d8 plus 9. Lifesteal! So

00:33:55.390 --> 00:34:01.109
you lay your stinky, rumpke trash hands on her

00:34:01.109 --> 00:34:04.150
body and the magic starts to flow out of you

00:34:04.150 --> 00:34:08.530
and around her. Her wounds just kind of slowly

00:34:08.530 --> 00:34:10.449
come back together. Some of them. She's still

00:34:10.449 --> 00:34:12.929
very badly damaged. But if you remove your hands,

00:34:12.989 --> 00:34:16.769
you still see the imprints of rumpke's trash

00:34:16.769 --> 00:34:19.869
handprint on her body and you fade back and she

00:34:19.869 --> 00:34:21.630
kind of starts breathing a little easier and

00:34:21.630 --> 00:34:25.409
goes unconscious, but Yeah wonder if my demon

00:34:25.409 --> 00:34:36.949
blood has healing properties She is not dying

00:34:36.949 --> 00:34:39.170
she's okay. She's just I'm just gonna need some

00:34:39.170 --> 00:34:42.309
time. Yes, you don't need a little bit But she

00:34:42.309 --> 00:34:46.730
did drop a sword and a odd -looking statue looks

00:34:46.730 --> 00:34:52.050
like and the captain paul so let me tell you

00:34:52.050 --> 00:34:55.829
there's a statue seems like a cleric you got

00:34:55.829 --> 00:34:59.150
a paul i put it on like a necklace it'll bring

00:34:59.150 --> 00:35:03.030
you luck um what is it i won't eat it i promise

00:35:03.030 --> 00:35:08.909
i don't like cat paul okay so as you guys kind

00:35:08.909 --> 00:35:15.420
of inspect these these weapons uh The sword is

00:35:15.420 --> 00:35:17.400
the flame tongue. Oh, it's not a sword. Fuck.

00:35:17.500 --> 00:35:20.019
I was wrong. Sorry. It's a flame tongue battle

00:35:20.019 --> 00:35:31.880
axe. So, two -handed battle axe. Oops. I have

00:35:31.880 --> 00:35:33.780
to find this thing now. I thought I had it on

00:35:33.780 --> 00:35:35.500
my notes right here. Did you say woo tongue?

00:35:36.059 --> 00:35:40.159
Flame tongue. Flame tongue? Yes. Not a guy that's

00:35:40.159 --> 00:35:54.099
immune to fire. Act slash and burn. Statue. Put

00:35:54.099 --> 00:35:56.079
it in your bunghole and you turn into a deity.

00:35:58.300 --> 00:36:04.099
And you turn into the beast. Transformation.

00:36:04.880 --> 00:36:08.940
So yeah, you find the Flametongue Battleaxe.

00:36:09.019 --> 00:36:11.340
And the other one that, as you get closer and

00:36:11.340 --> 00:36:14.599
look at it, it's a statue of a tower. It's like

00:36:14.599 --> 00:36:18.019
this little mini fortress. It's got big gargoyle

00:36:18.019 --> 00:36:21.340
-like bird -looking statue things on top. Big

00:36:21.340 --> 00:36:23.760
rounded door entrance on it, but it's all just

00:36:23.760 --> 00:36:26.559
like this little statue. So you don't really

00:36:26.559 --> 00:36:29.400
know what that does until you use it. What's

00:36:29.400 --> 00:36:34.920
that about? It's a key. Pee on it. Don't. Make

00:36:34.920 --> 00:36:37.039
it rain on the building. Is it made of stone?

00:36:38.059 --> 00:36:40.079
Imagine if it's like a pack -up fortress that

00:36:40.079 --> 00:36:42.099
you could just put down like a tent and stay

00:36:42.099 --> 00:36:44.960
in it for the night. That would be dope. Uh,

00:36:45.079 --> 00:36:49.139
it's like, uh... A legendary magic item. Don't

00:36:49.139 --> 00:36:51.780
I have stone, Cunny? It's just a model piece.

00:36:53.619 --> 00:36:56.099
Collector's item. I thought I could get history

00:36:56.099 --> 00:37:01.460
from stones or something. Oh, no. Maybe. I thought

00:37:01.460 --> 00:37:03.619
it was only, like, stone dwarves or mountain

00:37:03.619 --> 00:37:06.340
dwarves. It looks like a kind of, like, a type

00:37:06.340 --> 00:37:11.139
of metal... It's adamantine. Which is, like,

00:37:11.139 --> 00:37:14.860
the most strongest... metal known to D &D world,

00:37:14.920 --> 00:37:16.340
I'm pretty sure. You can pee on it, nothing will

00:37:16.340 --> 00:37:20.440
happen. So I'm rich now. Pee on it, poop on it.

00:37:20.559 --> 00:37:23.340
What do you want to do? You don't really know

00:37:23.340 --> 00:37:25.139
what it does, but you know that there is some

00:37:25.139 --> 00:37:27.440
kind of special power to this motherfucker that

00:37:27.440 --> 00:37:30.159
you can use. You're welcome to test it out. Just

00:37:30.159 --> 00:37:32.940
don't pee on it or poop on it. Don't actually

00:37:32.940 --> 00:37:37.920
do that. Try some stuff out. You can. Don't put

00:37:37.920 --> 00:37:48.550
it in your butt. I'm assuming you're taking the

00:37:48.550 --> 00:37:51.170
Flametongue Battleaxe. You're taking the statue.

00:37:51.809 --> 00:37:54.210
She's taking the cat paw. This thing is called...

00:37:54.210 --> 00:37:58.309
It's my cat. It's her paw. And you're taking

00:37:58.309 --> 00:38:00.690
the paw. It might give you good luck. It's like

00:38:00.690 --> 00:38:05.409
a rabbit, but it's a cat paw. Miss Muffin. Agility.

00:38:06.599 --> 00:38:09.900
Hey, it might. It's a cat paw. So, Miss Muffin,

00:38:09.960 --> 00:38:14.000
as you put a necklace, so you put this paw around

00:38:14.000 --> 00:38:19.579
your neck, and you feel this magic kind of just

00:38:19.579 --> 00:38:25.480
this primal meow through your body, and Salish

00:38:25.480 --> 00:38:28.500
pops up and she goes, oh, that's your cat's paw,

00:38:28.579 --> 00:38:31.800
isn't it? Yes. That thing's got power in it.

00:38:31.860 --> 00:38:36.150
Your cat's. Is your cat magic? She's a beautiful

00:38:36.150 --> 00:38:39.429
thing. Your cat might be something special. We

00:38:39.429 --> 00:38:43.469
might have to figure this out. Okay, so this

00:38:43.469 --> 00:38:45.650
is going to make it where you're immune to being

00:38:45.650 --> 00:38:48.550
prone and you're immune to being surprised. So

00:38:48.550 --> 00:38:51.269
since you've got this cat fur on, you can't be

00:38:51.269 --> 00:38:53.969
knocked down. You can't be knocked down because

00:38:53.969 --> 00:38:56.250
you're a cat. You always land on your feet. And

00:38:56.250 --> 00:38:58.869
you can't be surprised. Like someone sneaks up

00:38:58.869 --> 00:39:02.030
and attacks you. How do I add it? I already added

00:39:02.030 --> 00:39:04.949
it. Okay. Okay. Added it secretly. She gets decreased

00:39:04.949 --> 00:39:08.590
bowling damage. So, yeah, now you can't, like,

00:39:08.610 --> 00:39:10.570
if they throw you, you're not going to be laying

00:39:10.570 --> 00:39:12.369
on the ground. Once you got spit out the scroll,

00:39:12.570 --> 00:39:14.989
she would land on our feet. Yeah. I land on my

00:39:14.989 --> 00:39:18.130
feet. I'm a cat. Yeah. And if someone sneak attacks

00:39:18.130 --> 00:39:20.309
you, it won't matter. Like, you can't be surprised.

00:39:20.690 --> 00:39:24.289
You're like, meow. You're ready. Meow. So, yeah.

00:39:24.349 --> 00:39:26.909
Spidey sins. And then, please take, you got your

00:39:26.909 --> 00:39:28.849
statue. So, you're welcome to test that out how

00:39:28.849 --> 00:39:31.599
you like. Do what you want with it. That's what

00:39:31.599 --> 00:39:33.559
happens. You guys are ready for a long rest.

00:39:33.719 --> 00:39:36.000
As they kind of, you see Corley. I can't rest.

00:39:36.099 --> 00:39:39.420
Corley and some guards take off the genie lady

00:39:39.420 --> 00:39:42.460
and get her somewhere to get bandaged up and

00:39:42.460 --> 00:39:44.940
healed up and rest. Is there a sleep potion?

00:39:46.000 --> 00:39:48.760
I'm sure they can. I'm sure the kitchen can work

00:39:48.760 --> 00:39:55.440
up something. We'll see. Roll. Roll what? To

00:39:55.440 --> 00:39:57.900
see what they do and to see how good you handle

00:39:57.900 --> 00:40:02.820
it. Roll what? I rolled an 18. Plus what? Okay,

00:40:02.860 --> 00:40:04.960
they rolled very poorly on their cooking skills

00:40:04.960 --> 00:40:06.900
of making sleeping medicine. But you rolled good

00:40:06.900 --> 00:40:08.260
enough to where it's not going to fuck you up.

00:40:08.739 --> 00:40:11.000
So it doesn't work. You don't go to sleep. You're

00:40:11.000 --> 00:40:15.420
not poisoned either. They make food. They're

00:40:15.420 --> 00:40:17.840
not alchemists or chemists. What's a long rest

00:40:17.840 --> 00:40:19.219
when you can't sleep because you're depressed?

00:40:19.900 --> 00:40:21.980
I don't know. You're going to have to find a

00:40:21.980 --> 00:40:23.219
way or you're going to get in your heels and

00:40:23.219 --> 00:40:29.079
breathe sand. No, I'm good. One quick punch to

00:40:29.079 --> 00:40:32.960
the forehead. Maybe not one. Maybe 17 quick punches

00:40:32.960 --> 00:40:38.199
to the forehead. Yes. Okay. So what are you guys

00:40:38.199 --> 00:40:39.980
doing for the rest of the night? I'd like to

00:40:39.980 --> 00:40:44.300
look at my fucking axe. I have not been told

00:40:44.300 --> 00:40:46.940
anything about it. Is that what it does? Yeah.

00:40:48.000 --> 00:40:51.960
Or is it flame tongue? The flame tongue battle

00:40:51.960 --> 00:40:55.280
axe. Dual wielder. It makes your tongue catch

00:40:55.280 --> 00:40:59.849
on fire. Or it just makes you cuss a lot. It

00:40:59.849 --> 00:41:04.369
makes you say really heated things. I don't have

00:41:04.369 --> 00:41:06.789
the space for the whole thing. It's just flamed

00:41:06.789 --> 00:41:09.690
up. You can use a bonus action to speak this

00:41:09.690 --> 00:41:12.369
magic sword's command word, causing flames to

00:41:12.369 --> 00:41:18.989
erupt from the blade. It's an axe. These flames

00:41:18.989 --> 00:41:21.329
shed a bright light in a 40 -foot radius and

00:41:21.329 --> 00:41:23.840
dim light for an additional 40 feet. While the

00:41:23.840 --> 00:41:26.199
sword is a blaze, it deals an extra 2d6 fire

00:41:26.199 --> 00:41:28.719
damage to any target it hits. The flame lasts

00:41:28.719 --> 00:41:30.699
until you use a bonus action to speak the command

00:41:30.699 --> 00:41:33.639
word again or until you sheath it. It is a battle

00:41:33.639 --> 00:41:40.139
axe. Yes. So I don't know. You have to look at

00:41:40.139 --> 00:41:42.059
the damage. I don't know what it is. So it's

00:41:42.059 --> 00:41:46.480
an emerald fury. Fuck. But it does a lot more

00:41:46.480 --> 00:41:48.139
than a fury emerald. I think it does a lot more

00:41:48.139 --> 00:41:51.000
than a fury. Is it an actual thing or is it made

00:41:51.000 --> 00:41:52.760
up? Oh, it's Flametongue. It's real. It just

00:41:52.760 --> 00:41:54.679
has every different type of weapon version, really.

00:41:56.219 --> 00:41:59.159
It sounds like a wand, then. Like Flametongue.

00:42:01.739 --> 00:42:06.480
Okay, um... That's you. Flea Stick, are you...

00:42:06.480 --> 00:42:08.000
What are you doing for the night? You done? You

00:42:08.000 --> 00:42:11.260
going to bed? Yeah, I'm resting. Okay. Everyone

00:42:11.260 --> 00:42:14.079
else going to try to bed? I ate too much bread.

00:42:14.079 --> 00:42:17.619
I'm so drunk. Roll stealth check with advantage.

00:42:21.320 --> 00:42:28.579
With advantage. 17 plus 12. You're very hidden

00:42:28.579 --> 00:42:30.659
wherever you are. No one knows where I'm at crying.

00:42:31.000 --> 00:42:34.019
Oh my god. And I'm the quietest crier ever to

00:42:34.019 --> 00:42:38.579
be known. So yeah, as you guys kind of lay down

00:42:38.579 --> 00:42:41.300
and get yourself ready for bed, Flea Stick, you

00:42:41.300 --> 00:42:45.420
hear the voice of your god. Rob King, he goes,

00:42:45.480 --> 00:42:50.539
Flea Stick! I see that you got us some new followers.

00:42:51.280 --> 00:42:55.099
The ones inside your village here. You just see

00:42:55.099 --> 00:42:58.079
him like a symbol of him inside of the room.

00:42:58.320 --> 00:43:01.219
And he goes, I see you made some followers. That's

00:43:01.219 --> 00:43:03.820
pretty cool, pretty cool. And he sits down on

00:43:03.820 --> 00:43:06.500
the counter with a shelf there. He just stinks

00:43:06.500 --> 00:43:10.139
it up, sits down on it. He goes, so I heard in

00:43:10.139 --> 00:43:13.719
your head when you talked about me about wanting

00:43:13.719 --> 00:43:15.139
to consult me, what do you want to consult me

00:43:15.139 --> 00:43:18.869
about? Uh, we found this deity statue and I want

00:43:18.869 --> 00:43:20.829
to know what's going on with it. Oh, toss it

00:43:20.829 --> 00:43:25.250
here. It goes through and hits the wall. So he

00:43:25.250 --> 00:43:27.809
turns around and he looks down at it and he goes,

00:43:27.849 --> 00:43:30.210
sorry, I forgot. I was not really here. He turns

00:43:30.210 --> 00:43:33.110
around and looks at it and he goes, oh, please

00:43:33.110 --> 00:43:37.190
stay. This here is... We forgot the name, so

00:43:37.190 --> 00:43:41.829
hang on. This is Darren's instant fortress, my

00:43:41.829 --> 00:43:45.320
guy. If you place this on the ground... speak

00:43:45.320 --> 00:43:49.300
its command word make it summon it is a portable

00:43:49.300 --> 00:43:54.039
tower my guy 20 feet probably 20 feet 30 feet

00:43:54.039 --> 00:43:57.179
high maybe even but yeah you dude you got a portable

00:43:57.179 --> 00:44:00.139
tower fortress little thing here that's crazy

00:44:00.139 --> 00:44:06.519
where'd you get that a friend a friend huh well

00:44:06.519 --> 00:44:10.340
that's awesome um my gypsy friend yeah so yeah

00:44:10.340 --> 00:44:15.230
you um you marked her Yes, I did. Yeah, she's

00:44:15.230 --> 00:44:19.010
uh, she's fucking powerful. So I'm not gonna

00:44:19.010 --> 00:44:21.050
let that one die. I'm gonna take care of her

00:44:21.050 --> 00:44:24.269
If she disappears, just tell them it's fine.

00:44:24.369 --> 00:44:26.030
It's okay. Okay, you know what I mean? Just tell

00:44:26.030 --> 00:44:29.309
them it's fine So yeah, I'll check you later.

00:44:29.369 --> 00:44:30.869
Please take good luck with your fortress and

00:44:30.869 --> 00:44:33.170
he just kind of like snaps out It's a little

00:44:33.170 --> 00:44:35.710
stink cloud. That's good. It kind of pops up

00:44:35.710 --> 00:44:39.530
So yeah, everybody can take their long rests

00:44:40.269 --> 00:44:42.530
You know what your fortress thing does it'll

00:44:42.530 --> 00:44:44.869
just instantly create it'll go. I know exactly

00:44:44.869 --> 00:44:47.849
how I'm gonna kill a boss now Yeah, but you guys

00:44:47.849 --> 00:44:49.750
distract them. I'm just gonna shove it up his

00:44:49.750 --> 00:44:53.869
ass and when it expands, but I don't know Yeah,

00:44:54.409 --> 00:44:56.309
give him the ant man Thanos treatment. Yeah,

00:44:56.369 --> 00:44:59.869
exactly. What was the commanding word? I don't

00:44:59.869 --> 00:45:01.469
know what they mean when they say that so I just

00:45:01.469 --> 00:45:04.690
always give us Usually make up a command word

00:45:04.690 --> 00:45:07.880
so oh I just It says Dungeons and Dragons, but

00:45:07.880 --> 00:45:09.880
we do what we want. Dungeons ain't for saying

00:45:09.880 --> 00:45:14.019
dragons. What I said was funnier. Like, Dukes

00:45:14.019 --> 00:45:16.440
is these nuts for something. Oh yeah, I remember

00:45:16.440 --> 00:45:18.320
that. That is my new packed weapon. What is it?

00:45:18.739 --> 00:45:20.900
Your one, it's like a command word. Oh, for my

00:45:20.900 --> 00:45:24.639
spear, I think? Tees nuts? Tees nuts? Yeah, for

00:45:24.639 --> 00:45:27.079
my lightning javelin? Yeah, because you have

00:45:27.079 --> 00:45:31.360
to use the command word to start it. Yeah. I'll

00:45:31.360 --> 00:45:35.199
think of a cool one. It's probably a heart. Or

00:45:35.199 --> 00:45:37.510
was it the ring? One of them. Something you use

00:45:37.510 --> 00:45:42.309
it for. Dumpster juice. I think it was the ring.

00:45:42.409 --> 00:45:45.750
The lightning bolt ring. Dump city. Dump city.

00:45:46.170 --> 00:45:48.489
I need a new command word for the eggs. Probably

00:45:48.489 --> 00:45:53.090
be ignite. Something simple. Flame on. Flame

00:45:53.090 --> 00:46:00.349
on. Yeah. Yeah. Or burn. Or. Roar or something.

00:46:00.349 --> 00:46:04.539
Burn baby burn. Ghost rider. Disco burn. Okay,

00:46:04.619 --> 00:46:11.480
so yeah, you guys take your long rest. All right,

00:46:12.559 --> 00:46:14.059
so yeah, you take your long rest. You awaken

00:46:14.059 --> 00:46:19.079
to the happy morale, higher morale guards watching

00:46:19.079 --> 00:46:22.739
the walls. Coralie a little rested, not having

00:46:22.739 --> 00:46:26.099
to get up as early and cook. She's already taking

00:46:26.099 --> 00:46:28.219
notes and stuff, and you can see her writing

00:46:28.219 --> 00:46:30.820
letters and strapping them to pigeons. Yeah.

00:46:30.900 --> 00:46:34.730
Yeah. Yeah. Carry your pigeons. Very good. To

00:46:34.730 --> 00:46:38.650
send off for some upkeep people to come in and

00:46:38.650 --> 00:46:41.070
kind of do some room. I could one -hand that.

00:46:41.570 --> 00:46:45.289
What? The battle axe. Really? Yes. It's versatile

00:46:45.289 --> 00:46:48.269
for me. Oh. Huh. Well, I mean, two -handed, you

00:46:48.269 --> 00:46:50.150
get more damage, but that's fine. Yeah, but I

00:46:50.150 --> 00:46:53.449
can also carry, like, something else. Like a

00:46:53.449 --> 00:46:56.090
wand. Like a wand. A spear. You know what I'm

00:46:56.090 --> 00:46:58.769
saying? You just, like, tie the wand to the battle

00:46:58.769 --> 00:47:05.070
axe handle. Just be like... Okay, so you're waiting.

00:47:05.429 --> 00:47:07.110
Yeah, that thing's happening with Coralie, what

00:47:07.110 --> 00:47:13.070
I just said. She's got... Oh, you guys, I got

00:47:13.070 --> 00:47:15.110
your coordinates. I mapped them out for you,

00:47:15.130 --> 00:47:17.429
and I drew up a map. So if you want a map, you

00:47:17.429 --> 00:47:19.869
can make your way to this place. But I will tell

00:47:19.869 --> 00:47:22.210
you, I don't know what's out there. It's, like,

00:47:22.230 --> 00:47:25.150
weird out there. It's, like, swampy and, like...

00:47:25.150 --> 00:47:29.849
Used to it. Used to swampy? Used to weird. Oh,

00:47:29.849 --> 00:47:33.460
well, yeah. Used to weird. so yeah um things

00:47:33.460 --> 00:47:35.940
i don't understand he said i've got you uh the

00:47:35.940 --> 00:47:40.159
swamp will die yes well i mean you've you've

00:47:40.159 --> 00:47:42.199
you've changed because you didn't kill globicle

00:47:42.199 --> 00:47:47.860
i understand it i'm glad you do um so she says

00:47:47.860 --> 00:47:51.900
uh we got we got you guys some backpacks uh rucksacks

00:47:51.900 --> 00:47:54.460
uh fantasy style whatever you call those things

00:47:54.460 --> 00:47:59.269
book bag yeah we're gonna call them yeah For

00:47:59.269 --> 00:48:02.070
my scroll pack. We've got your rucksacks with

00:48:02.070 --> 00:48:03.650
some food, because I'm sure you're going to be

00:48:03.650 --> 00:48:07.989
needing it on your journey. And if you need...

00:48:07.989 --> 00:48:11.389
That's all we've got. At this point, we've just

00:48:11.389 --> 00:48:13.789
got food and some supplies for the journey. Why

00:48:13.789 --> 00:48:16.429
are you talking shit about Globicals? I know

00:48:16.429 --> 00:48:20.110
you will, dude. He's just a nice guy. He wants

00:48:20.110 --> 00:48:22.650
love and approval. He just wants love and approval.

00:48:22.789 --> 00:48:25.570
That's all. So, yeah. She gives you this map.

00:48:25.750 --> 00:48:30.760
Who wants the map? I'll take them. Alright. She

00:48:30.760 --> 00:48:34.420
gives the map to Duke Crystal. You guys ready

00:48:34.420 --> 00:48:35.940
to go on your journey or do you want to do anything

00:48:35.940 --> 00:48:38.199
special before you leave? I hand the map to Felicity.

00:48:38.940 --> 00:48:41.360
I just didn't want her. Yeah, that's a good idea.

00:48:41.980 --> 00:48:44.900
So yeah. I take the map. And it's his now because

00:48:44.900 --> 00:48:52.780
it's Dex. It's his. It's been bonded. You have

00:48:52.780 --> 00:48:57.889
a bond with it. You make your journey. You're

00:48:57.889 --> 00:48:59.949
traveling through the woods and it's starting

00:48:59.949 --> 00:49:01.969
to get like darker and gloomier and gloomier

00:49:01.969 --> 00:49:05.449
and weirder Swampier and darker darker and also

00:49:05.449 --> 00:49:15.769
pretty much gloomier So yeah, but I can well

00:49:15.769 --> 00:49:19.929
jokes on them I want shit to see us So yeah,

00:49:19.929 --> 00:49:21.590
you'd like your sword, but all you're seeing

00:49:21.590 --> 00:49:25.699
is like this Oh, I can see. Yeah, you see everything.

00:49:25.920 --> 00:49:29.760
I want the creature to see me walking with the

00:49:29.760 --> 00:49:33.500
light in the darkness. Well, potential creatures.

00:49:34.059 --> 00:49:37.780
I don't want them to miss us. I want them to

00:49:37.780 --> 00:49:41.539
see me. Pussies. You come up ahead, but you're

00:49:41.539 --> 00:49:44.659
seeing this light just beaming down ahead. A

00:49:44.659 --> 00:49:47.739
big circle onto this little tree -infested building.

00:49:49.519 --> 00:49:52.679
Interesting. I'm going to open up. So what do

00:49:52.679 --> 00:49:55.019
you do as you see this? Yeah, it's a treehouse.

00:49:55.139 --> 00:49:59.039
A ground treehouse. A treehouse! That's what

00:49:59.039 --> 00:50:03.619
I do. A treehouse? It's a house. It's just a

00:50:03.619 --> 00:50:07.840
tree. Ground houses are just houses. With trees.

00:50:08.159 --> 00:50:12.500
Is it a tree growing through a house, or is it

00:50:12.500 --> 00:50:16.260
a tree in... It's a house with a tree growing.

00:50:16.889 --> 00:50:19.969
Through it. Over it. Like every other fucking

00:50:19.969 --> 00:50:21.690
house. So the house ain't built around it. It

00:50:21.690 --> 00:50:23.750
has a tree next to it. We need more specifics.

00:50:24.010 --> 00:50:25.550
Let's talk about it for an hour. It's like a

00:50:25.550 --> 00:50:28.570
magic witchy tree house. A house with a tree.

00:50:28.570 --> 00:50:31.349
I kicked the fucking door in. I kicked the fucking

00:50:31.349 --> 00:50:35.829
door in. Does it have a door I can kick in? Yes,

00:50:35.829 --> 00:50:38.489
it has a door. You kicked the door in. Fuck.

00:50:39.249 --> 00:50:41.050
And there's no witches in the house. That's why

00:50:41.050 --> 00:50:42.750
I squished the bitch when I kicked the door in.

00:50:43.969 --> 00:50:47.309
This is her home. She told you. She told you.

00:50:47.389 --> 00:50:55.969
She was like, I thought I heard something. No,

00:51:04.889 --> 00:51:06.969
this is her home. She told you to go get it.

00:51:07.159 --> 00:51:09.260
clues about to figure out where she's at. Yeah,

00:51:09.260 --> 00:51:11.800
no one's here. No one's here. She's captured.

00:51:12.960 --> 00:51:15.860
Fuck, was her door kicked in? Yeah, you go to

00:51:15.860 --> 00:51:17.599
kick in the door and the door's already kicked

00:51:17.599 --> 00:51:21.559
in. Well, fuck. You gave me hiccups. I'm mad

00:51:21.559 --> 00:51:23.579
now. So yeah, you're mad you didn't kick the

00:51:23.579 --> 00:51:25.460
door in. Someone got to it before me. Yeah, so

00:51:25.460 --> 00:51:29.260
you go inside and you're seeing this very witchy

00:51:29.260 --> 00:51:32.039
ass house. There's a big corner cabinet. I have

00:51:32.039 --> 00:51:35.579
the map open too. I forgot. Corner cabinet kitchen

00:51:35.579 --> 00:51:38.920
with a just random supplies and ingredients and

00:51:38.920 --> 00:51:42.679
shit. Table with multiple chairs. You're seeing

00:51:42.679 --> 00:51:45.519
trophies. Yeah, you're seeing trophies on the

00:51:45.519 --> 00:51:49.500
wall, like animal heads and shit. That's what

00:51:49.500 --> 00:51:50.980
you see as you walk into the front main room.

00:51:52.039 --> 00:51:56.940
I started looking. I mean, looking. I mean, looking.

00:51:58.639 --> 00:52:08.150
That's a fucking title right there. So, Oh, my

00:52:08.150 --> 00:52:17.050
hiccups hurt. It's a witch's spell. Who cares?

00:52:18.710 --> 00:52:24.329
Okay, so as you walk into this main opening room

00:52:24.329 --> 00:52:26.670
here, you're looking... Give me a perception

00:52:26.670 --> 00:52:30.590
check as you're looking. I'm looking. Eleven.

00:52:32.409 --> 00:52:35.119
Roll with advantage. That's a nineteen. Are you

00:52:35.119 --> 00:52:37.960
all looking? Can I roll with advantage? All right,

00:52:37.980 --> 00:52:40.219
yeah, everybody looking. Can I roll with advantage?

00:52:41.460 --> 00:52:45.659
No. 15 plus 5, 20. Oh, are you spending a luck

00:52:45.659 --> 00:52:48.179
die? Yeah. Yes, because Miss Muffin's got a new

00:52:48.179 --> 00:52:50.820
feat. Lucky. I was going to say, he can't tell

00:52:50.820 --> 00:52:53.780
me no. Okay, yeah. Roll advantage. Oh, not 20.

00:52:53.880 --> 00:52:56.719
Oh, suck it. Tell me what I see. Tell me. Tell

00:52:56.719 --> 00:53:05.559
me. You see... You see... Guys, I'm stuck at

00:53:05.559 --> 00:53:11.619
this. North, east, west. Just remember we. At

00:53:11.619 --> 00:53:18.059
the west end of the room when you walk in, you

00:53:18.059 --> 00:53:22.440
see this big red cross. Just stuck to the wall.

00:53:22.539 --> 00:53:24.699
You can definitely tell that this thing has got

00:53:24.699 --> 00:53:28.360
some sneaky bitch going to work on it. With a

00:53:28.360 --> 00:53:30.059
nat 20, you're able to see that this thing is

00:53:30.059 --> 00:53:33.769
sneaky. It's got something going on. What do

00:53:33.769 --> 00:53:38.809
you want to do? Sniff it. She's got a fucking

00:53:38.809 --> 00:53:41.429
thing, man. She wants to smell that cat butthole.

00:53:41.610 --> 00:53:47.710
Okay. What? As you get close to this thing, you

00:53:47.710 --> 00:53:50.489
put your face right up to this thing that I said

00:53:50.489 --> 00:53:53.969
has got some sneaky bits going on with it. You

00:53:53.969 --> 00:53:58.130
get close to it, you hear this little hiss, and

00:53:58.130 --> 00:54:00.329
this needle sticks you right in the forehead.

00:54:04.210 --> 00:54:07.530
You just had to do that, huh? You just had to

00:54:07.530 --> 00:54:11.269
do that. You don't stick your face next to four

00:54:11.269 --> 00:54:13.909
objects. Roll with advantage. No. No, you have

00:54:13.909 --> 00:54:16.570
to stab him in the fucking face. I think you're

00:54:16.570 --> 00:54:18.070
supposed to use it before, but I'll let you use

00:54:18.070 --> 00:54:23.130
it this time. Oh, okay. Well, 19 plus 3. Okay.

00:54:23.329 --> 00:54:25.230
Still have to stab him in the face. I have a

00:54:25.230 --> 00:54:30.289
lot of luck points left. You can't stop me. Okay,

00:54:30.329 --> 00:54:32.210
yeah, you kind of pull back out of this thing

00:54:32.210 --> 00:54:35.449
and it you feel it it tried to Suck out your

00:54:35.449 --> 00:54:37.730
blood, but you pulled back before it could actually

00:54:37.730 --> 00:54:41.829
take your blood out Yeah, there you go. Anything

00:54:41.829 --> 00:54:43.670
else you'd like to do with that thing? Uh, not

00:54:43.670 --> 00:54:47.710
sniff it again. Not gonna do that. I wonder what

00:54:47.710 --> 00:54:51.409
it would do with my blood. Go ahead, Duke. What's

00:54:51.409 --> 00:54:54.800
it look like? It's just a red cross, like, on

00:54:54.800 --> 00:54:57.260
the wall. Like, think, like... Oh, I think I'll

00:54:57.260 --> 00:54:58.539
catch fire. Like, medical. It sucks my blood.

00:54:58.539 --> 00:55:02.519
Like, medical, like, red cross. Let's take my

00:55:02.519 --> 00:55:06.059
arm out front of it. Okay, yeah. Yeah. You hear

00:55:06.059 --> 00:55:08.340
the same hiss come out. Makes me a Constitution

00:55:08.340 --> 00:55:22.099
Savior. 13. 13? Yeah. You do not pass. So...

00:55:22.380 --> 00:55:25.440
What was the advantage? I can give him a luck

00:55:25.440 --> 00:55:27.619
point as well. So I need to roll a deep floor.

00:55:28.000 --> 00:55:30.539
I'm curious what it's going to do. I'm tough

00:55:30.539 --> 00:55:33.099
on it. You're going to take minus one to your

00:55:33.099 --> 00:55:36.260
constitution. Minus one to my constitution? Until

00:55:36.260 --> 00:55:40.039
you can take it. But what's it do to him? Nothing?

00:55:40.519 --> 00:55:43.480
It takes his blood. It sucks his blood out of

00:55:43.480 --> 00:55:46.460
him. And you just see the thing kind of like

00:55:46.460 --> 00:55:51.340
fade back normal. Okay, I go back to looking.

00:55:51.460 --> 00:55:53.800
I did roll a 19 on that perception for looking

00:55:53.800 --> 00:55:58.000
around. I can re -roll if you'd like. So in this

00:55:58.000 --> 00:56:00.179
room, that's about all the interesting stuff

00:56:00.179 --> 00:56:03.159
you see. It's kind of just like witchy shit everywhere

00:56:03.159 --> 00:56:05.719
else. Ingredients and stuff. I thought it might

00:56:05.719 --> 00:56:07.780
pay me back with something. It's just a greedy

00:56:07.780 --> 00:56:11.320
bitch's thing, I guess. What the fuck's the point?

00:56:11.980 --> 00:56:13.900
Well, it's just like a little statue on the wall.

00:56:13.980 --> 00:56:17.739
Just to feed it? Keep it pumping? Thumping? Pulsating?

00:56:18.300 --> 00:56:19.559
She does some weird shit with that thing. It's

00:56:19.559 --> 00:56:21.960
up to you guys what you want to do with it. You've

00:56:21.960 --> 00:56:25.019
got it stuck to the wall if you're able to. Well,

00:56:25.099 --> 00:56:26.519
if it's going to keep grabbing my con, I ain't

00:56:26.519 --> 00:56:29.460
going to fucking touch it. All right. So what

00:56:29.460 --> 00:56:30.480
would you like to do then? Travel throughout

00:56:30.480 --> 00:56:33.079
the house? Yes. Start some more rooms? Okay,

00:56:33.079 --> 00:56:34.780
so you guys are going to move east through the

00:56:34.780 --> 00:56:39.179
house to the next open door? I suppose. So as

00:56:39.179 --> 00:56:42.440
you open through this next room, it kind of looks

00:56:42.440 --> 00:56:47.250
like a little bathtub wash basket thing. I'm

00:56:47.250 --> 00:56:48.369
trying to figure out where the actual fucking

00:56:48.369 --> 00:56:54.070
door is. Oh, I forgot to map. Look at my map.

00:56:55.110 --> 00:57:00.230
Map, map, map. Map, map, map. I'm trying to survive.

00:57:00.630 --> 00:57:08.070
You walk east and there's a door here. Yeah,

00:57:10.210 --> 00:57:11.829
I think they forgot to put some doors on the

00:57:11.829 --> 00:57:14.150
map. Yeah, you walk through a door here. There's

00:57:14.150 --> 00:57:16.940
a door. critical so yeah you walk uh through

00:57:16.940 --> 00:57:18.480
the east and you walk through a door there's

00:57:18.480 --> 00:57:23.300
a long hallway that heads to three look three

00:57:23.300 --> 00:57:30.539
closed doors on the west side of the room and

00:57:30.539 --> 00:57:32.780
a door on the north side it will say that too

00:57:32.780 --> 00:57:34.639
because for some reason there's not a door to

00:57:34.639 --> 00:57:38.440
that room that's what i was going to say how

00:57:38.440 --> 00:57:41.000
do i get to that room uh which rooms are you

00:57:41.000 --> 00:57:43.469
checking because there's three bedroom looking

00:57:43.469 --> 00:57:46.389
like bedroom there's three rooms in the hallway

00:57:46.389 --> 00:57:48.789
and then a door to the north i'm going to the

00:57:48.789 --> 00:57:51.170
octagon i want to check going out towards the

00:57:51.170 --> 00:57:54.769
north yeah the master bedroom with the biggest

00:57:54.769 --> 00:57:58.030
bed picture well that's biggest room has a hammock

00:57:58.030 --> 00:58:05.889
so uh please take a miss muffin you went north

00:58:05.889 --> 00:58:11.030
we went never yeah okay so we'll do a duke real

00:58:11.030 --> 00:58:14.500
quick duke you uh open this room and you're it's

00:58:14.500 --> 00:58:17.380
you see just a kind of scattered beat up room

00:58:17.380 --> 00:58:21.000
what are you gonna do loot it look at it uh perception

00:58:21.000 --> 00:58:30.659
look at it uh 17 plus nothing so 17. 17. i'm

00:58:30.659 --> 00:58:33.199
not very perceptive um that's not bad uh you

00:58:33.199 --> 00:58:34.500
look around this room and it looks like this

00:58:34.500 --> 00:58:38.199
was the room that uh minerva which is the name

00:58:38.199 --> 00:58:41.260
of the witch She looks like this room she stays

00:58:41.260 --> 00:58:43.239
in mostly. You're seeing letters and stuff on

00:58:43.239 --> 00:58:45.780
the nightstands next to her. There's pages and

00:58:45.780 --> 00:58:51.099
journal writings and everything. Some empty bottles.

00:58:53.300 --> 00:58:56.840
So it's a fucking bust. I'm going to trash it

00:58:56.840 --> 00:59:00.159
even more. Trash it even more. What else would

00:59:00.159 --> 00:59:01.719
you like to do? Anything else? Are you checking

00:59:01.719 --> 00:59:07.150
these other rooms? The middle room looks like

00:59:07.150 --> 00:59:11.590
it's a never -been -used guest room. The very

00:59:11.590 --> 00:59:17.630
southern room, as you enter, you see a very super

00:59:17.630 --> 00:59:21.570
beautiful, intricate -looking mirror against

00:59:21.570 --> 00:59:23.849
the wall with two other beds sitting across the

00:59:23.849 --> 00:59:30.989
room. I look in the mirror. You look in it? I

00:59:30.989 --> 00:59:41.320
just check myself out, I guess. Make me a perception

00:59:41.320 --> 00:59:44.079
check as you're looking at this mirror checking

00:59:44.079 --> 00:59:48.800
old Duke out 18 18 Wow So as you're looking inside

00:59:48.800 --> 00:59:50.960
of it, you just see like the glimpse of a face

00:59:50.960 --> 00:59:54.159
like kind of just like cross by inside the mirror

00:59:54.159 --> 00:59:57.300
It's like kind of like Lifting back and forth

00:59:57.300 --> 01:00:02.659
Now make me a charisma save as you're seeing

01:00:02.659 --> 01:00:05.019
this face come flittering back and forth and

01:00:05.019 --> 01:00:11.239
say Griffith great fail. Yes Wowza. This could

01:00:11.239 --> 01:00:12.539
have been one of the worst times to use that.

01:00:13.360 --> 01:00:17.239
Oh, inspiration. You got inspiration? Okay. Let's

01:00:17.239 --> 01:00:21.539
see if we can even pass it. 11 plus 2, so 13.

01:00:21.860 --> 01:00:24.539
Ah, you failed still. It's better than crit fail.

01:00:24.760 --> 01:00:28.340
Yeah, okay. So, yeah. Crit fail would have been

01:00:28.340 --> 01:00:29.480
catastrophic. It would have been catastrophic,

01:00:29.619 --> 01:00:31.440
but it's still going to suck. So you're looking

01:00:31.440 --> 01:00:34.079
inside this thing, and as you're trying to look

01:00:34.079 --> 01:00:36.599
at this face that's moving around in there...

01:00:36.800 --> 01:00:39.639
You realize that the mirror, once you look back

01:00:39.639 --> 01:00:42.860
from it, you're inside the mirror. The mirror

01:00:42.860 --> 01:00:46.280
has pulled you inside. When you look around,

01:00:46.639 --> 01:00:50.179
it's like walls of mirrors and mirrors. Make

01:00:50.179 --> 01:00:56.380
me another perception check. 19. You're looking

01:00:56.380 --> 01:00:58.639
through these mirrors. It's just like a house

01:00:58.639 --> 01:01:01.260
of mirrors everywhere. Then you just happen to

01:01:01.260 --> 01:01:04.239
see a goblin or a gnome sitting on the ground

01:01:04.239 --> 01:01:07.349
in one of the little... mirrors like it's like

01:01:07.349 --> 01:01:11.650
a you notice that there's like a an edge to them

01:01:11.650 --> 01:01:14.030
and he's sitting inside of one of the other mirrors

01:01:14.030 --> 01:01:16.889
uh he's just sitting there kind of writing in

01:01:16.889 --> 01:01:21.090
a piece of paper uh what do you do uh ask him

01:01:21.090 --> 01:01:26.389
what is this place what why what are you inside

01:01:26.389 --> 01:01:29.369
the did she oh that bitch did she get you to

01:01:29.369 --> 01:01:33.530
apparently minerva apparently i got man minerva's

01:01:33.530 --> 01:01:36.380
not there Unless this mirror just does its own

01:01:36.380 --> 01:01:38.039
thing. She's not there? Like she's not in the

01:01:38.039 --> 01:01:41.059
house? No. Oh, fuck. He seems like ding, ding,

01:01:41.079 --> 01:01:42.920
ding, ding, ding, ding. He's like beating on

01:01:42.920 --> 01:01:45.139
the edge of the mirror. He's like, oh, that bitch.

01:01:45.139 --> 01:01:46.719
I need to get out of here. Do you have people

01:01:46.719 --> 01:01:50.480
with you? Yes. Oh, my God. Perfect. Do they smash

01:01:50.480 --> 01:01:53.840
things? Yes. That's normally my job, but they

01:01:53.840 --> 01:01:56.820
can manage it. Okay. If they're able to somehow

01:01:56.820 --> 01:02:02.440
smash this, we can get out. Are you sure? Yeah.

01:02:02.829 --> 01:02:04.650
That's the only way. This is a cell. This is

01:02:04.650 --> 01:02:07.530
a prison. This isn't just a normal... She has

01:02:07.530 --> 01:02:09.309
this mirror. It's called a mirror of trapping.

01:02:10.289 --> 01:02:12.849
You look in it, and it's got these interdimensional

01:02:12.849 --> 01:02:16.050
cells that they just lock you in. I was her artist.

01:02:16.130 --> 01:02:18.090
I was here to draw her. I was going to draw her

01:02:18.090 --> 01:02:20.769
up for a portrait that she wanted, and I got

01:02:20.769 --> 01:02:23.670
greedy and looted her room, and she threw me

01:02:23.670 --> 01:02:27.690
in here. So, yeah. Wait, you did what now? I

01:02:27.690 --> 01:02:29.750
tried to loot her room. I was going to loot her

01:02:29.750 --> 01:02:32.869
room. Did you get anything? No! I saw this pretty

01:02:32.869 --> 01:02:34.550
mirror and thought, oh, I could make some money

01:02:34.550 --> 01:02:37.550
off that, and I got sucked right into this bitch,

01:02:37.690 --> 01:02:40.309
so now I'm here. I got my pen and paper. I've

01:02:40.309 --> 01:02:42.469
just been writing. My quill. So you haven't really

01:02:42.469 --> 01:02:45.429
tried breaking out? No, I've just been stuck.

01:02:46.110 --> 01:02:48.690
I can't. There's no breaking out. It's interdimensional.

01:02:48.989 --> 01:02:51.250
You beat on these motherfuckers and they don't

01:02:51.250 --> 01:02:54.130
break. I hit it with the axe real hard. Okay,

01:02:54.130 --> 01:03:03.139
give me an attack roll. 15 plus 9 yeah so you

01:03:03.139 --> 01:03:05.599
hit this mirror and it just shatters the inside

01:03:05.599 --> 01:03:07.920
mirror you hit it and then it just goes free

01:03:07.920 --> 01:03:10.119
forms yeah another mirror just like pops right

01:03:10.119 --> 01:03:14.820
up um so here's where we got a big old problem

01:03:14.820 --> 01:03:17.820
we're gonna flip on back to please stick and

01:03:17.820 --> 01:03:21.340
miss muffin and they don't know anything we just

01:03:21.340 --> 01:03:25.739
entered the north so you're on your own here

01:03:25.739 --> 01:03:30.159
um You guys enter this big octagon room, and

01:03:30.159 --> 01:03:33.699
you can see this is a room she used for some

01:03:33.699 --> 01:03:36.179
kind of teleporting, summoning magic. There's

01:03:36.179 --> 01:03:38.719
a big circular magic area in the middle of the

01:03:38.719 --> 01:03:41.059
room. But as soon as you step in, you feel this

01:03:41.059 --> 01:03:43.360
wave of magic just hit you all in the chest.

01:03:44.260 --> 01:03:48.679
And before you can even do anything, you realize

01:03:48.679 --> 01:03:51.039
you're starting to float. You're just slowly

01:03:51.039 --> 01:03:53.619
coming off the ground as if gravity has just

01:03:53.619 --> 01:03:58.280
shifted in this room. Yeah, so you don't want

01:03:58.280 --> 01:04:02.639
nobody in this room. So make me a perception

01:04:02.639 --> 01:04:08.739
check and a dexterity save. That's the question

01:04:08.739 --> 01:04:17.440
for old boy. Nat 20? Yep. Okay, what'd you get,

01:04:17.559 --> 01:04:22.739
Kelly? My perception was 14 plus 5. Okay. And

01:04:22.739 --> 01:04:29.000
a 19 plus 1. You said dexterity, right? I rolled

01:04:29.000 --> 01:04:36.559
an eight for dexterity. Plus dexterity? Four

01:04:36.559 --> 01:04:40.940
plus four. Okay, so with a nat 20 on your perception

01:04:40.940 --> 01:04:48.750
flea stick, you... I'll say with the perception

01:04:48.750 --> 01:04:51.949
that when you see the shift coming at you because

01:04:51.949 --> 01:04:54.510
of your innate magic powers, and you're able

01:04:54.510 --> 01:04:56.929
to grab onto something as it shifts and flips

01:04:56.929 --> 01:04:58.789
you upside down, so you're hanging on upside

01:04:58.789 --> 01:05:03.829
down to a thing on the wall, a rod or a candle

01:05:03.829 --> 01:05:05.469
or something, so you're not fully just floating

01:05:05.469 --> 01:05:13.369
upside down. And with your... Well, shit, that

01:05:13.369 --> 01:05:14.809
kind of goes with the deck save because you also

01:05:14.809 --> 01:05:18.059
pass your decks. Yeah. I'll give you advantage,

01:05:18.320 --> 01:05:20.519
or you're going to have extra time to be able

01:05:20.519 --> 01:05:22.739
to do what's coming next. That's what we'll get

01:05:22.739 --> 01:05:25.880
out of your good roll. Miss Muffin, you failed.

01:05:26.039 --> 01:05:29.159
Yeah. So you guys notice as you start floating

01:05:29.159 --> 01:05:31.920
a little faster up top, you see the ceiling as

01:05:31.920 --> 01:05:36.059
you're looking up, and you see this giant arc

01:05:36.059 --> 01:05:39.099
start kind of like zapping and buzzing, and then

01:05:39.099 --> 01:05:41.119
a whole wall of lightning just... Grapple myself.

01:05:41.500 --> 01:05:44.139
And starts like... Grapple. Zapping across the

01:05:44.139 --> 01:05:46.869
ceiling. Oh, that goes. Grapple. You grapple

01:05:46.869 --> 01:05:49.170
what? What do you mean? I have a grapple, so

01:05:49.170 --> 01:05:51.409
I just use it and grapple to something. You just

01:05:51.409 --> 01:05:55.269
throw a rope at something? You have one? For

01:05:55.269 --> 01:05:58.550
real? Yeah. A grapple hook? Yes. I have one.

01:05:58.590 --> 01:06:01.090
Perfect. I don't want to die. You'll have to

01:06:01.090 --> 01:06:02.710
give me some rolls to see if you can grapple

01:06:02.710 --> 01:06:05.070
to something. Let me look just so I can show

01:06:05.070 --> 01:06:07.050
you. That's fine. I trust you. This is where

01:06:07.050 --> 01:06:09.530
strength's going to really hurt you. Huh? This

01:06:09.530 --> 01:06:11.429
is where strength's going to hurt you. Yeah.

01:06:11.449 --> 01:06:14.550
Because you have to physically untuck you. No,

01:06:14.570 --> 01:06:17.360
not you. Well, now you're gonna have to climb

01:06:17.360 --> 01:06:20.980
the rope. Yeah, cause you also have to try to

01:06:20.980 --> 01:06:24.800
get it to go through a no -gravity zone. Shouldn't

01:06:24.800 --> 01:06:26.400
be too hard. Toss it to me. It should keep its

01:06:26.400 --> 01:06:32.099
momentum real nice, actually. Torch water. Just

01:06:32.099 --> 01:06:35.820
give me a strength check. No, you don't even

01:06:35.820 --> 01:06:41.719
have one. I was trying to find where I even saw

01:06:41.719 --> 01:06:43.739
it at. I trust you have one. Give me a strength

01:06:43.739 --> 01:06:49.679
check. Okay, give you a strength check. Yeah,

01:06:49.719 --> 01:06:51.719
to try to throw this hook to get yourself an

01:06:51.719 --> 01:06:54.760
advantage from the... Roll with advantage? No.

01:06:56.480 --> 01:06:59.760
Well, then ten. Ten? Okay, no. You're not able

01:06:59.760 --> 01:07:01.860
to get a good hook on anything. You just don't

01:07:01.860 --> 01:07:03.780
have the oomph to throw that thing through this.

01:07:03.900 --> 01:07:05.940
I don't want to die! Well, then you best get

01:07:05.940 --> 01:07:08.400
ready to use your brain. It's about to get tough.

01:07:08.760 --> 01:07:11.619
Your brawn doesn't work. So as this activates

01:07:11.619 --> 01:07:13.579
and, you know, Flea Stick's like, whoa, upside

01:07:13.579 --> 01:07:16.699
down, you hear this Minerva's voice and she goes,

01:07:17.079 --> 01:07:22.119
ow, someone's coming after my bags, huh? You

01:07:22.119 --> 01:07:25.659
want my bags? Well, then I'll tell you. If you're

01:07:25.659 --> 01:07:30.000
able to get past my secret riddles, then you

01:07:30.000 --> 01:07:33.980
can have my bags. And the voice like kicks out

01:07:33.980 --> 01:07:39.559
and then you hear the... So here's riddle number

01:07:39.559 --> 01:07:43.980
one. It's an easy one. What can fill a room but

01:07:43.980 --> 01:07:51.920
takes up no space? Water. Air. As you get that

01:07:51.920 --> 01:07:54.780
wrong, you feel Kelly, Miss Muffin, you start

01:07:54.780 --> 01:07:56.619
to get a little bit closer to the ceiling. No!

01:07:56.659 --> 01:07:58.780
You get a little, you get advantage because you

01:07:58.780 --> 01:08:01.440
had, please take, you get good rolls on your

01:08:01.440 --> 01:08:04.780
thing. So you don't move yet. All right. What

01:08:04.780 --> 01:08:07.440
else, what can you do? What can fill a room but

01:08:07.440 --> 01:08:12.219
takes up no space? It's really not air? No. What

01:08:12.219 --> 01:08:14.599
can fill a room but takes up no space? It doesn't

01:08:14.599 --> 01:08:18.180
fill the room. I mean, I guess that is kind of

01:08:18.180 --> 01:08:20.260
right, isn't it? Yeah, it is. And it's not water?

01:08:20.279 --> 01:08:22.880
No, air does take up... Just because we move

01:08:22.880 --> 01:08:24.859
through it doesn't mean it's not taking up space.

01:08:25.060 --> 01:08:28.020
There's gas all around us at all times. We just

01:08:28.020 --> 01:08:30.960
don't see it. So it doesn't fill a room. Sunlight.

01:08:31.279 --> 01:08:35.420
It does, though. It's a metaphor. Sunlight? Light.

01:08:35.520 --> 01:08:40.439
Yes. Dude can't answer, so if even he gets it,

01:08:40.560 --> 01:08:43.420
it's... It had to be a metaphor for something.

01:08:43.560 --> 01:08:46.460
Ah, correct. You feel the gravity kind of hold

01:08:46.460 --> 01:08:50.300
you in place for a moment. Thank God. Next riddle.

01:08:50.439 --> 01:08:54.640
No. The more there is, the less you see. What

01:08:54.640 --> 01:09:02.449
is it? The more there is. The less you see. This

01:09:02.449 --> 01:09:07.649
one's easy. Missed up and you float a little

01:09:07.649 --> 01:09:11.810
bit closer. You've only got a couple more wrongs

01:09:11.810 --> 01:09:13.069
before you're going to hit your first round.

01:09:13.189 --> 01:09:16.329
I already know the answer. Yes, the darkness.

01:09:16.590 --> 01:09:21.250
The darkness. That's also what I said. Okay,

01:09:21.390 --> 01:09:24.170
next up. That wouldn't work for me either. I

01:09:24.170 --> 01:09:28.939
can see in the dark. Poor people have it. Rich

01:09:28.939 --> 01:09:32.640
people need it. If you eat it, you die. What

01:09:32.640 --> 01:09:41.899
is it? That one's easy, guys. It's easy. I knew

01:09:41.899 --> 01:09:43.800
they'd be easy for you, so I'm glad. I don't

01:09:43.800 --> 01:09:45.640
know why, but I'm... Shut up, Jim Crestillo back

01:09:45.640 --> 01:09:47.899
there! Nerd Jam! He has the video game brain,

01:09:47.920 --> 01:09:50.699
so it makes us do this stuff. I already forgot

01:09:50.699 --> 01:09:54.119
what you said. Poor people have it. Rich people

01:09:54.119 --> 01:09:57.500
need it. If you eat it, you die. I was going

01:09:57.500 --> 01:09:59.779
to say love, but then you said if you eat it,

01:09:59.800 --> 01:10:06.220
you die. Now I'm confused and scared. If you

01:10:06.220 --> 01:10:10.079
eat it, you die. No, there's not a timer. You

01:10:10.079 --> 01:10:12.260
didn't tell us we were tired. Well, you can't

01:10:12.260 --> 01:10:13.840
go forever. You're floating in gravity. We have

01:10:13.840 --> 01:10:15.659
to think. Our brains are slow. And you're talking

01:10:15.659 --> 01:10:19.760
to me. Think. Poor people have it. Rich people

01:10:19.760 --> 01:10:22.539
need it. If you eat it, you die. What is it?

01:10:22.600 --> 01:10:28.060
You're running out of time. Money? Poor people.

01:10:28.399 --> 01:10:30.460
You float a little bit closer to the ceiling

01:10:30.460 --> 01:10:33.340
wall of lightning. You got probably about...

01:10:33.340 --> 01:10:35.199
I gotta stop thinking at that. And you start

01:10:35.199 --> 01:10:37.340
to get pulled off your ledge. Give me a strength

01:10:37.340 --> 01:10:39.300
save to hang on to your... What's the answer?

01:10:40.380 --> 01:10:41.840
You're not gonna get it. You're gonna get it

01:10:41.840 --> 01:10:43.300
until you hit that fucking wall of lightning

01:10:43.300 --> 01:10:45.220
and then you're gonna be like, ow, fuck, and

01:10:45.220 --> 01:10:47.039
then you're gonna try to take that brain artery.

01:10:47.399 --> 01:10:49.840
Four teeth. Alright, you're able to hang on before

01:10:49.840 --> 01:10:52.300
the gravity yanks you off of the thing. I mean,

01:10:52.319 --> 01:10:55.180
flea sticks hanging on. They got lucky. What

01:10:55.180 --> 01:10:59.079
do you got? Rich people need it. If you eat it,

01:10:59.340 --> 01:11:04.880
you die. Just let Kelly keep answering. Watch

01:11:04.880 --> 01:11:07.960
her. He's holding it. He's going to be healing

01:11:07.960 --> 01:11:13.380
with one hand. Is this your task? You've been

01:11:13.380 --> 01:11:17.659
chosen. Poor people have it. Rich people need

01:11:17.659 --> 01:11:22.779
it. If you eat it, you die. What does poor people

01:11:22.779 --> 01:11:27.890
have that rich people need? Besides love. Love.

01:11:28.050 --> 01:11:31.609
I already got the answer. I know it's right.

01:11:32.250 --> 01:11:36.569
Besides love. What do poor people have? What

01:11:36.569 --> 01:11:39.770
do poor people have? Nothing. That's the point.

01:11:40.550 --> 01:11:48.329
Poor. Nothing. Poor people have it. Rich people

01:11:48.329 --> 01:11:50.210
need it. You're right. That's what I said. You

01:11:50.210 --> 01:11:52.489
accidentally did it. Good job. I came up with

01:11:52.489 --> 01:11:57.260
that. You just needed one warning. You just needed

01:11:57.260 --> 01:11:59.399
one warning of the sentence at a moment. It took

01:11:59.399 --> 01:12:02.520
me like five seconds. Okay. I had it. Next up,

01:12:02.619 --> 01:12:04.899
your final riddle. I was bashing the glass. This

01:12:04.899 --> 01:12:08.520
one's going to be a good one. Until I am measured,

01:12:08.640 --> 01:12:12.500
I am not known. Yet how you miss me when I have

01:12:12.500 --> 01:12:16.939
flown. What am I? Gravity. Give me a strength

01:12:16.939 --> 01:12:28.710
save. What? 13 plus 2. You're starting to break

01:12:28.710 --> 01:12:30.930
loose. Your hand wiggles loose and you get a

01:12:30.930 --> 01:12:33.090
little bit closer. You have clammy hands. Alright.

01:12:33.229 --> 01:12:36.449
Repeat it. Until I am measured, I am not known.

01:12:36.630 --> 01:12:40.289
Yet how you miss me when I have flown. What am

01:12:40.289 --> 01:12:49.069
I? It's messed up. You can take a hint, but it'll

01:12:49.069 --> 01:12:52.460
probably push you a little closer. Yes, good

01:12:52.460 --> 01:12:55.520
job. Yeah, it's time or as you're like literally

01:12:55.520 --> 01:12:58.619
about to like lick this lightning wall of lightning

01:12:58.619 --> 01:13:01.699
Blasting you hear the phone 27 feet. You're like

01:13:01.699 --> 01:13:04.680
time. It's like you just fall back to the ground.

01:13:04.760 --> 01:13:06.880
That's me My voice doing I'm gonna roll you some

01:13:06.880 --> 01:13:09.020
you land on your feet. You do land on your feet.

01:13:09.079 --> 01:13:13.960
Good job. Yeah So as you land you see these two

01:13:13.960 --> 01:13:16.020
bags like in the ceiling as a lightning disappears

01:13:16.020 --> 01:13:18.840
and they just go Falling right next to your head

01:13:19.720 --> 01:13:22.100
These are some rewards that you guys I know are

01:13:22.100 --> 01:13:23.899
going to love that you guys have been hunting

01:13:23.899 --> 01:13:27.819
for. Squirrels? No. You get a bag of holding

01:13:27.819 --> 01:13:33.779
and a bag of magic beans. Magic beans! Put the

01:13:33.779 --> 01:13:37.899
beans in the holding. This episode of Dummies

01:13:37.899 --> 01:13:40.279
with Dice features Kelly Lee as Miss Muffin,

01:13:40.340 --> 01:13:43.779
Nate Chambers as Duke Crystal, Ryan Tucker as

01:13:43.779 --> 01:13:46.380
Flea Stick Sock Jelly, and Tristan Hayes as the

01:13:46.380 --> 01:13:49.380
DM. The episode is edited and mixed by Tristan

01:13:49.380 --> 01:13:51.859
Hayes. The artwork for Dummies with Dice created

01:13:51.859 --> 01:13:54.340
by Al Sorensen can be found on Instagram under

01:13:54.340 --> 01:13:59.760
A -R -C -S -I -0. The theme song is The Intense

01:13:59.760 --> 01:14:02.359
Fiddle by Ben Caldera. When it comes to Dummies

01:14:02.359 --> 01:14:05.300
with Dice, you can find our website on rss .com

01:14:05.300 --> 01:14:08.300
slash podcast slash dummies with dice. and on

01:14:08.300 --> 01:14:10.960
Facebook at Dummies with Dice. Most importantly,

01:14:10.960 --> 01:14:14.380
join our Patreon at patreon .com slash dummieswithdice

01:14:14.380 --> 01:14:18.060
for free or for $3 monthly to gain access to

01:14:18.060 --> 01:14:21.020
a Discord and bonus content. Come back in two

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weeks for new episodes of Dummies with Dice.