WEBVTT

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Thank you. Hey, it's your Dummy Master, Tristan,

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code thank you w energy Dear warning, use of

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violence profanity, rude humor, and the portrayal

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of frantic alcohol use. I always like how you

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have that little backup use there. Welcome to

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Dummies with Dice, a Dungeons & Dragons actual

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play podcast that follows three not -so -average

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dummies of our world that get caught up in a

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magical storm and are transported to the world

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of Dungeons & Dragons. I almost said four dummies

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again. Okay, so... I am Tristan Hayes and I am

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your dummy master and the question of the day

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today today of the day is going to be what item

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do you hope will be obsolete in 20 years so Duke

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miss muffin and flea stick what item do you guys

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hope would be non -existent not worthy in 20

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years something that you wouldn't want to exist

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miss muffin or your characters All cat haters.

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All cat haters. I don't think it's an item. I

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think it's people. People aren't items. Thong

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flip -flops. Thong flip -flops. Duke's answer

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is all minorities. All minorities. Jeez. We did

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not do our intros. I just realized we just answered.

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That's fine. Everybody's heard them. Yeah. You

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know who we are. I'm me, and I play me. Duke's

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the demonic fucking meth head. Well, actually,

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he doesn't really feel like he needs to do meth

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as much anymore. Yeah, he's got a different fuel.

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Yeah, it's a bonus. It's the thing you use for

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a tune -up when you really need to... This is

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the Ducks show. Duke Crystal. The Octane Booster.

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Yes. Duke Crystal's crazy. Please take Unforgettable.

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Please take Unforgettable. Disgusting. He is

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a trash month. He's the master of garbage. He's

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got the old imprint. Trash? Okay, let's get into

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the D &D. So, so, can you guess what I'm going

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to say next? You're going to say, um... Who wants

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to say it? Too late. Where we last left off...

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You messed it up. Yeah, I got it. Where we last

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left off, the dummies were going through the

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Dungeon of Deception, and you guys had done quite

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a few things. Opened up a zombie door with flea

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sticks magic. Duke survived a wine room that

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almost smashed flea stick in the door as well.

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Miss Muffin, I think you just killed stuff for

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the most part. I'm good on it. I think you've

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been killing things. Dagger, dagger, dagger.

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You found a secret door in the hallway where

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you entered this room full of cauldrons and a

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sarcophagus and a shield that had a hunter man

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jump out that you blinded the shield by wrapping

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something around it. So that's where we are.

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You guys killed the skeletons, you looted the

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thing, the sarcophagus on the chariot. And I

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figured the fiddle out. You bowed to the faceless

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for bowing to no one, correct? Good job. Except

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Duke. He kind of faked it and lost it and then

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almost attacked by a hunter's thing. So what

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would you guys like to do? I'm sorry, no. Make

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me a perception check. Oh, okay. You guys have

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kind of cleaned up. That's not fair! Roll with

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advantage? No. That is usually how it goes with

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Miss Bones. Please, Master. Will we roll with

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perception? 7, 5, 13. 6. 6? You got a what? 13.

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13? Okay, so... Yeah, that's good enough. Okay,

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so you, Felistic, you're kind of walking over

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this room. You're kind of on the east end of

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the room. And you're looking at these cauldrons

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and kind of like, what's happened? And Miss Muffin

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comes running up and trips as you're kind of

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looking at this section of the wall here. And

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she headbutts the shit out of this wall. And

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you see this wall kind of open up. But, Ms. Muffin,

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you're going to take three damage from your Nat

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1s. Three damage. Point -bog concussion. Head

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-butting a secret panel in the wall that at least

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they technically found, but you Nat 1 it, so

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you get to get hit in the head. So, yeah, you

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find a secret tunnel that kind of opens up to

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another room. Secret tunnel. Secret tunnel. So

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you can go back the way you came, or you can

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continue through the secret tunnel if you'd like.

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You also know that there's a secret door outside

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the room you just entered to the west end of

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the hallway. So you kind of just got two secret

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doors. Or back out of the dungeon. Do you remember,

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did we take any short rests or anything? You

00:06:03.170 --> 00:06:06.889
have not taken any short rests. You guys can

00:06:06.889 --> 00:06:08.569
if you'd like, if you want to kind of set up,

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but you are in a dungeon, so that's a dangerous

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aspect. Do you want to do like shifts or anything?

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Yeah, we need to do some healthy health. Especially

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with my concussion. Ask me if you have a concussion

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from hitting a stone wall. Let's drink one of

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my greater healing potions. Yeah. Okay. It's

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not all right. It's all right. Give it to you.

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Eight, nine plus four. Forty -four plus four?

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Yes. That's a greater. Yeah. Fair enough. How

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hard was it? How much did you get back, Nick?

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Thirteen. Not great. Oh, well, yeah, you got

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a lot of health on you. Yeah, you can't, your

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best roll would be twenty health, though. I got

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sixteen all together. Nice. Decent. Decent. Okay,

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well, you drank your potions. Slurred it. What

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would you like to do? Move to the secret door

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in the west of the hallway, secret door to the

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east of this room, or back out of the dungeon.

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I'm assuming back out of the dungeon is not going

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to be the choice. The secret tunnels are fine.

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Now it's just a matter of which secret tunnel.

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You guys can split up or you can split together.

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No, no, no. It's been dangerous so far in a way,

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so if you do split up, you know that could be

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dangerous. What's up to you guys? No splitting

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up. Dangerous moment. We can roll for it. One

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through ten, first door. I rolled no. Ten through

00:07:44.000 --> 00:07:46.500
twenty, second door. Oh, that's fine. So you

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guys are flipping a coin to see what secret door

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you go through? Yeah, sure. We don't have a coin.

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Nine. The first door. The first? The one that's

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in the room with you? Okay. Okay, what order

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are you guys going through this place? I just

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want to make sure it's a tight spot. Middle.

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I'm in the middle. Okay. I guess I'm in the front.

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Alright. Let's see ancient cobwebs fill this

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narrow corridor whose midpoint features an arched

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alcove Within the alcove a dusty bottle stands

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on a tape Are you wanting to take a closer look

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at it? I blew on it. You going past it, dude?

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I'm going to look around at the rest of the room.

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I mean, it's just a bottle. Is it literally just

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the roof of the bottle? It's a bottle and there's

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a door at the other end, yeah. But the door's

00:08:47.500 --> 00:08:49.600
closed, so you can open it or... I'll try to

00:08:49.600 --> 00:08:51.519
check out of the door. Okay, so we'll do you

00:08:51.519 --> 00:08:53.179
first, Flea Stick, since you're going to kind

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of check out this bottle. All right. So you peek

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down at this bottle and... You you see this small

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woman inside the bottle. It's just old and dusty

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not cryptid And you hear this muffled voice calling

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out from inside of it. It's like Yelling you

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can't really understand what she's saying because

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he's like trapped in this bottle, but yeah Okay,

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so All right, yeah you give me a We'll just be

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dexterity or strength see how do give me dexterity

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See if you can hang on like when you're shaking

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this bottle like what kind of like happening

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inside not me, please Yeah, I mean, you know,

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what is the dexterity? Again your main page just

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right there. Yeah 13. 13. Okay, so you're shaking

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this bottle, but, like, you're feeling the pressure

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of her, like, kind of bouncing off, and then

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you're, like, nothing really happens, and she

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kind of falls back down, and then you kind of

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hear her get up against the glass, and she's,

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like, speaking this weird language that you just

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cannot understand. Say it again. Tell us what

00:10:11.269 --> 00:10:15.149
it sounds like. I don't know. Try it. Terran

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is what it's called. To you it sounds like gibberish.

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Just like random letters coming out because you

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can't understand anything that's happening. You

00:10:25.149 --> 00:10:27.409
can just break the bottle. You can if you want.

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Throw it against the wall. If you want to try

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it. You can take an action too. It's not just

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flea sticks thing. If you want to snag the bottle

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out of his hands and do something you can. Yeah,

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do it. I'm going to wait. Okay, so yeah, what

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would you guys like to do? This thing speaks

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gibberish at you because you can't understand

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what it's saying. Should we let it out? Yeah.

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I was talking to you guys. I can't see you. When

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you say that, you see the woman inside shaking

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your head. Yes. Up and down. Nodding. Are you

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going to be a good little creature? You say it

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like, do the like. Hands up to her face. She's

00:11:12.289 --> 00:11:16.809
like... She's nodding vigorously like, yes. She's

00:11:16.809 --> 00:11:19.690
too cute. Punches it. Knocks it out of your hand.

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Can't wait for it to fly right in your eye socket.

00:11:22.169 --> 00:11:24.929
Okay, give me your dexterity. Like the tooth

00:11:24.929 --> 00:11:30.389
fairy. Yeah. A little creepy bastard. Chew right

00:11:30.389 --> 00:11:35.570
in your skull. An eight? An eight. You try to

00:11:35.570 --> 00:11:37.169
quickly punch it out of his hand and you miss.

00:11:37.679 --> 00:11:39.340
That's not a great dexterity check. So yeah,

00:11:39.340 --> 00:11:41.120
you tried to break it, and it's obvious that

00:11:41.120 --> 00:11:43.700
you tried to break it. Break it! Break it! Probably

00:11:43.700 --> 00:11:45.960
just pull the cover off. I'm just gonna pop the

00:11:45.960 --> 00:11:49.059
lid off. Yeah. Okay, so you just pop that thing

00:11:49.059 --> 00:11:53.240
off there, and this huge whirlwind of sand just

00:11:53.240 --> 00:11:56.080
kind of like shoots out of this thing and fills

00:11:56.080 --> 00:11:58.019
the room and hits the walls and just kind of

00:11:58.019 --> 00:12:01.960
falls to the ground. And see what she looks like.

00:12:04.679 --> 00:12:07.179
She comes out this one comes out and she's got

00:12:07.179 --> 00:12:09.720
just like belly button piercing looks like a

00:12:09.720 --> 00:12:14.700
genie Let me just say it looks like a genie so

00:12:14.700 --> 00:12:17.720
She comes out and she see the spell kind of form

00:12:17.720 --> 00:12:19.799
on her hands as magic and she shoots it at all

00:12:19.799 --> 00:12:22.559
of you And you can suddenly understand her she's

00:12:22.559 --> 00:12:27.360
she casted tongues So she you cast this and she

00:12:27.360 --> 00:12:32.320
goes oh Oh yeah, I thank you guys so much for

00:12:32.320 --> 00:12:37.179
letting me out of this stupid bottle. Since you

00:12:37.179 --> 00:12:40.139
released me, I have to fulfill any promise that

00:12:40.139 --> 00:12:43.720
you guys want, so what wish do you want? I'll

00:12:43.720 --> 00:12:47.120
hold on to that. You'll hold on to it? Yeah,

00:12:47.139 --> 00:12:49.840
you have to go with us now. She's like, so I'm

00:12:49.840 --> 00:12:52.700
not going with you guys. I've been trapped in

00:12:52.700 --> 00:12:55.120
that bottle, trapped by a douchebag named Aceract.

00:12:56.519 --> 00:12:58.220
I'm assuming you guys have no idea about him,

00:12:58.279 --> 00:13:02.080
because you would be a lot more in knowing of

00:13:02.080 --> 00:13:04.600
what this place is. He's a demon, right? No,

00:13:04.720 --> 00:13:07.519
no, he's not a demon. I can't really get into

00:13:07.519 --> 00:13:11.559
that. I'm getting the fuck out of here. But since

00:13:11.559 --> 00:13:15.360
you released me, it's my duty as a Dao to fulfill

00:13:15.360 --> 00:13:19.399
your wish. So, yeah, what would you like? Can

00:13:19.399 --> 00:13:22.419
I wish for two wishes? No, no, you can't. No.

00:13:22.779 --> 00:13:25.899
Clever. Clever one. What if I wish for them to

00:13:25.899 --> 00:13:28.480
have infinity wishes? Uh, no. And you're pissing

00:13:28.480 --> 00:13:30.600
me off. So I'm going to let you... What if I

00:13:30.600 --> 00:13:32.940
wish? We're just told we can't have one for two.

00:13:33.240 --> 00:13:36.539
You can't get pissed off when we let you out.

00:13:36.600 --> 00:13:38.320
Because I've been trapped in a ball for eons.

00:13:38.379 --> 00:13:40.580
For a very, very... You know what eons are? A

00:13:40.580 --> 00:13:43.480
long time. Just so... Yeah. Well... Well, what

00:13:43.480 --> 00:13:45.940
if I wish for us to have the best armor in this

00:13:45.940 --> 00:13:48.039
universe has to offer throughout the whole team?

00:13:48.080 --> 00:13:50.340
So you want some really, really strong armor.

00:13:50.970 --> 00:13:52.950
Is what you want? What do you think, guys? We

00:13:52.950 --> 00:13:55.470
gotta really think about this. What's the catch?

00:13:55.990 --> 00:13:58.429
Yeah, there's always a catch. What is the fucking

00:13:58.429 --> 00:14:02.029
catch? Roll an insight check. Ain't nothing free

00:14:02.029 --> 00:14:03.990
in this world. Please take. Roll an insight check.

00:14:04.049 --> 00:14:16.570
Or D &D World. Eleven. Eleven. So you make this,

00:14:16.669 --> 00:14:20.309
you fail, but... You feel this little that entity

00:14:20.309 --> 00:14:23.250
does Attached to your body he kind of peeks his

00:14:23.250 --> 00:14:25.169
little bird beak up to your ear and you just

00:14:25.169 --> 00:14:27.269
hear him go You need to treat this down like

00:14:27.269 --> 00:14:30.470
a servile lick spittle And he kind of like fades

00:14:30.470 --> 00:14:32.850
back down into your shoulder and he sticks his

00:14:32.850 --> 00:14:34.570
head out He goes it means treat her like shit.

00:14:34.629 --> 00:14:36.929
She's a servant and then sticks his head back

00:14:36.929 --> 00:14:39.610
down into your head That's uh, so that's why

00:14:39.610 --> 00:14:49.330
you get out of your field I already got a plan.

00:14:49.529 --> 00:14:53.029
You guys can do what you want. I got things set

00:14:53.029 --> 00:14:58.029
in motion. In my brain. Do it. Unless the genie

00:14:58.029 --> 00:15:00.870
tries to say that, you know. Oh, you can't do

00:15:00.870 --> 00:15:03.710
that. I'm not making a wish yet. I'm waiting.

00:15:04.049 --> 00:15:05.870
I'm trying to loophole a wish. She goes, okay,

00:15:06.009 --> 00:15:07.990
so I see you guys are struggling to kind of come

00:15:07.990 --> 00:15:10.370
up with an exact answer. We need some godly weapons.

00:15:10.470 --> 00:15:11.730
She goes, so I'll give you a little bit of a

00:15:11.730 --> 00:15:15.169
deal here of an understanding of what I can do.

00:15:15.330 --> 00:15:18.049
She goes, so... Yeah, I can give you all of this.

00:15:18.190 --> 00:15:20.049
And she, like, points at her, like, armbands

00:15:20.049 --> 00:15:22.090
and stuff. And it's, like, sapphire coiled, like,

00:15:22.129 --> 00:15:24.250
braided hair things, like, in her hair. And there's,

00:15:24.269 --> 00:15:26.690
like, platinum armbands on her. She goes, I can

00:15:26.690 --> 00:15:31.009
give you these and call it no wish. Or I can

00:15:31.009 --> 00:15:32.649
give you your wish. She goes, that's up to you

00:15:32.649 --> 00:15:35.309
guys. But she goes, I'm really, you know, been

00:15:35.309 --> 00:15:37.009
here a long time. I'm ready to get out of here.

00:15:37.110 --> 00:15:40.190
So if you guys want to make a choice, that's

00:15:40.190 --> 00:15:43.490
fine. But let's try to get it before I get stuck

00:15:43.490 --> 00:15:45.860
back in a bottle. That didn't really tell us

00:15:45.860 --> 00:15:48.940
what you're capable of doing. Well, let's see.

00:15:49.059 --> 00:15:52.659
I could take you anywhere you want to go on this

00:15:52.659 --> 00:15:55.000
place. If you want to teleport somewhere, we

00:15:55.000 --> 00:15:58.340
can do that. But if you're wanting to go out

00:15:58.340 --> 00:15:59.960
of this realm, no, I can't do that. Take me to

00:15:59.960 --> 00:16:02.919
my cat. Can I wish for you to be my personal

00:16:02.919 --> 00:16:05.580
teleportation device throughout the rest of my

00:16:05.580 --> 00:16:08.759
stay? Yeah. When we're done here, I'm gone. I

00:16:08.759 --> 00:16:11.659
probably won't see you guys again. Unless, hey,

00:16:11.700 --> 00:16:13.519
you find me another bottle. But I don't think

00:16:13.519 --> 00:16:17.000
I'm going back in a bottle. I wish for you to

00:16:17.000 --> 00:16:21.000
go find my cat and bring her back to me in one

00:16:21.000 --> 00:16:23.039
piece. Bring her back to you in one piece. Alive

00:16:23.039 --> 00:16:27.179
and healthy. So she says, I heard a wish. And

00:16:27.179 --> 00:16:29.600
then you see her snap her hands and twist her

00:16:29.600 --> 00:16:31.980
hands. And she goes, OK, I'm going to give you

00:16:31.980 --> 00:16:35.580
one more wish. What do you guys want? But nothing's

00:16:35.580 --> 00:16:37.519
happened yet. you just see her kind of do some

00:16:37.519 --> 00:16:40.679
magic and then she goes more because my magic's

00:16:40.679 --> 00:16:42.759
at work i have to track your cat and then i will

00:16:42.759 --> 00:16:44.500
get your cat with the magic and bring your teeth

00:16:44.500 --> 00:16:48.740
hazel so i thought no that's like one for the

00:16:48.740 --> 00:16:50.700
group that's why when she said that i was like

00:16:50.700 --> 00:16:54.100
what yeah so you get two wishes from her because

00:16:54.100 --> 00:16:56.759
it's either you get her equipment or you get

00:16:56.759 --> 00:16:59.580
two wishes what's her equipment though wish for

00:16:59.580 --> 00:17:02.059
her to go back in the bottle no she said her

00:17:02.059 --> 00:17:05.000
equipment or a wish each I'm trying to find a

00:17:05.000 --> 00:17:07.420
loophole situation. I can't wish for two wishes.

00:17:07.539 --> 00:17:09.279
I can wish for the genie to get back in the bottle.

00:17:09.339 --> 00:17:10.980
Then we can pop the bottle again, and then we

00:17:10.980 --> 00:17:13.259
get two more wishes. Because every time you pop

00:17:13.259 --> 00:17:17.059
a genie out of a bottle. I don't know if it's

00:17:17.059 --> 00:17:19.279
exactly what it's like. Because I don't think

00:17:19.279 --> 00:17:21.039
it's like... Well, where are the genie balls?

00:17:21.359 --> 00:17:23.799
Where is the genie balls? Where is the balls?

00:17:24.339 --> 00:17:27.420
So it's not exactly a genie. It's a Tao. You

00:17:27.420 --> 00:17:29.900
said she was. I just described it as a genie.

00:17:30.000 --> 00:17:32.559
But it's like, it's a type of being that basically...

00:17:33.169 --> 00:17:35.390
was trapped in this thing and she's giving you

00:17:35.390 --> 00:17:39.190
guys a thing for helping her out of this model

00:17:39.190 --> 00:17:41.890
like it's not so much genie scenario it's just

00:17:41.890 --> 00:17:44.750
like she's helping you because you saved her

00:17:44.750 --> 00:17:46.210
from being trapped in this bottle for you why

00:17:46.210 --> 00:17:48.210
the hell the bird says treat her like a servant

00:17:48.210 --> 00:17:50.329
mitch will be gone after this i know that's what

00:17:50.329 --> 00:17:52.630
don't make sense he just means i think he was

00:17:52.630 --> 00:17:54.730
more so meaning treat her like crap like it's

00:17:54.730 --> 00:17:56.930
just a way i don't know it's just what he's this

00:17:56.930 --> 00:17:58.950
is a shitty bird that's what he says so let's

00:17:58.950 --> 00:18:00.549
see there's something huge but listen to him

00:18:00.549 --> 00:18:02.720
but Hope you guys wish for whatever you want.

00:18:02.759 --> 00:18:05.279
I'm over by the door. I already did. I was just

00:18:05.279 --> 00:18:07.180
trying to loophole where we had an infinite genie

00:18:07.180 --> 00:18:11.420
spell. I wish for the group to have godly weapons.

00:18:12.119 --> 00:18:15.059
Godly weapons. With no negative side effects.

00:18:15.180 --> 00:18:17.240
No negative side effects. So she kind of looks

00:18:17.240 --> 00:18:20.579
at you and she's like, so godly defined how?

00:18:21.400 --> 00:18:25.299
Because I can't, I'm not power enough to go literally

00:18:25.299 --> 00:18:29.000
take a god weapon. So what do you mean by god?

00:18:29.079 --> 00:18:31.970
You want me to bring you? a very very powerful

00:18:31.970 --> 00:18:34.549
weapon or a couple very very powerful weapons

00:18:34.549 --> 00:18:37.269
because you can do that but like if you're wondering

00:18:37.269 --> 00:18:40.069
very very powerful okay i will i will bring you

00:18:40.069 --> 00:18:43.549
two because miss lady over there got her wish

00:18:43.549 --> 00:18:46.710
she goes so if you want to where's my cat well

00:18:46.710 --> 00:18:50.609
i haven't done it yet is that fair awesome weapons

00:18:50.609 --> 00:18:55.230
you all down for that wish Awesome weapons. She

00:18:55.230 --> 00:18:58.650
goes, okay, alright, awesome weapons. I will

00:18:58.650 --> 00:19:01.309
find you some good weapons, I promise that. And

00:19:01.309 --> 00:19:03.329
you, I will do what I can. I will bring your

00:19:03.329 --> 00:19:04.690
cat back, because I'm going to track her down.

00:19:04.890 --> 00:19:06.950
And you see her kind of, like, waver magic and

00:19:06.950 --> 00:19:09.089
do these, like, swirly, Doctor Strange, like,

00:19:09.170 --> 00:19:11.849
symbols. She goes, but I'm out of here for now.

00:19:12.130 --> 00:19:14.009
And she snaps her fingers, and you see her kind

00:19:14.009 --> 00:19:16.349
of, like, do this, like, plane shift, like, phasing

00:19:16.349 --> 00:19:18.509
out. And she goes, what the hell is that? Oh

00:19:18.509 --> 00:19:20.450
shit, oh shit, oh shit! And then it just kind

00:19:20.450 --> 00:19:22.750
of, like, phases off. That you see her kind of

00:19:22.750 --> 00:19:25.609
disappear, so. Well, we ain't getting no shit

00:19:25.609 --> 00:19:28.589
now. You might, uh, you might... I don't know

00:19:28.589 --> 00:19:31.089
how to cut her up next time I see her. Somebody

00:19:31.089 --> 00:19:34.890
gangbanger in the shadow realm. Yeah. Uh, yeah,

00:19:34.930 --> 00:19:36.089
so you don't really know what happened to her.

00:19:36.109 --> 00:19:37.849
You may know that she might show up, she might

00:19:37.849 --> 00:19:39.930
not. But you know something might have gone wrong.

00:19:41.509 --> 00:19:45.750
Well, I opened the door. Okay. When you open

00:19:45.750 --> 00:19:48.130
this door, the air reeks of sulfur and brimstone.

00:19:48.609 --> 00:19:51.190
On the floor of this chamber, a pentagram, a

00:19:51.190 --> 00:19:54.319
pentagram, Traced in salt surrounds an ornate

00:19:54.319 --> 00:19:56.839
sarcophagus. It's lid covered with figurines

00:19:56.839 --> 00:19:59.799
of prancing frog -like humans. It's my cousin.

00:20:00.420 --> 00:20:03.559
It's my cousin. What would you like to do? You

00:20:03.559 --> 00:20:04.640
haven't entered the room. You just opened the

00:20:04.640 --> 00:20:07.420
door, so... You're kind of looking in the door

00:20:07.420 --> 00:20:09.359
and seeing just this... I should probably take

00:20:09.359 --> 00:20:11.599
the lead on this one. This rivety pentagram.

00:20:12.259 --> 00:20:16.039
Rivety sarcophagus inside of the pentagram. I'm

00:20:16.039 --> 00:20:20.160
the only one that's got demonic properties. So

00:20:20.160 --> 00:20:22.819
you're gonna enter actually you take these I

00:20:22.819 --> 00:20:27.119
took lead last room. Yeah, well Duke you're gonna

00:20:27.119 --> 00:20:30.519
have to either step in the room because I Will

00:20:30.519 --> 00:20:34.119
step in the threshold and then step as you step

00:20:34.119 --> 00:20:41.000
in the road one as you step You feel the entity

00:20:41.000 --> 00:20:44.519
your entity that you're packed in with Binded

00:20:44.519 --> 00:20:47.319
with he kind of like speaks to you through yourself

00:20:47.319 --> 00:20:50.339
because you're kind of fused so his Self -conscious?

00:20:50.519 --> 00:20:52.180
Yes, it's like a self -conscious thought, exactly.

00:20:52.619 --> 00:20:56.160
So he goes, Duke, there's something in there.

00:20:56.839 --> 00:20:58.660
And then that's the voice that kind of pops away.

00:20:59.160 --> 00:21:02.460
That self -conscious thought. So that's all you

00:21:02.460 --> 00:21:05.720
know, but what would you guys like to do? I guess

00:21:05.720 --> 00:21:07.740
it's good having a demonica entity attached to

00:21:07.740 --> 00:21:10.279
you sometimes to understand demonic powers. Well,

00:21:10.279 --> 00:21:12.299
I'll let Ms. Muffin go ahead. Ms. Muffin, what

00:21:12.299 --> 00:21:14.960
would you like to do as you see this? Salt -covered

00:21:14.960 --> 00:21:18.359
pentagram area, circle drawn with salt with sarcophagus

00:21:18.359 --> 00:21:20.680
inside with figurines of frog -like humanoid

00:21:20.680 --> 00:21:24.140
creatures. What would you like to do? Not disturb

00:21:24.140 --> 00:21:29.799
it. Okay. So... How so? Turning around and walking

00:21:29.799 --> 00:21:32.380
out, or...? Letting Duke Crystal go ahead and

00:21:32.380 --> 00:21:35.519
go first. I break one of the salt lines. Oh,

00:21:35.519 --> 00:22:01.329
fuck! No! So, how do you do this? I told you

00:22:01.329 --> 00:22:03.730
to take lead. I knew it was gonna happen. As

00:22:03.730 --> 00:22:05.029
soon as you were like, someone else take lead,

00:22:05.109 --> 00:22:06.569
I was like, if they don't, I know what's gonna

00:22:06.569 --> 00:22:08.950
happen. Well, yeah, I mean, you wanted the glass

00:22:08.950 --> 00:22:13.470
cannon, and now you're getting it. We're gonna

00:22:13.470 --> 00:22:16.329
either die, or we're gonna win this fight. And

00:22:16.329 --> 00:22:18.009
we're gonna get demonic shit, and I'm gonna take

00:22:18.009 --> 00:22:20.970
it from you. Because I'm a demon. Because I'm

00:22:20.970 --> 00:22:24.150
a demon. This is the hierarchy of demons. This

00:22:24.150 --> 00:22:27.440
is how it works. yeah plus i don't want to step

00:22:27.440 --> 00:22:29.059
in that salt circle are you saying you're kicking

00:22:29.059 --> 00:22:31.460
the salt like breaking the outer line out of

00:22:31.460 --> 00:22:34.019
line of it okay so you kick this uh outer line

00:22:34.019 --> 00:22:35.759
of salt and you just see the whole thing kind

00:22:35.759 --> 00:22:39.480
of like and like light up and disappear and there

00:22:39.480 --> 00:22:43.119
was an invisible creature known as a gray slat

00:22:43.119 --> 00:22:46.759
he kind of just forms inside this like center

00:22:46.759 --> 00:22:49.460
and looks at you and immediately you see this

00:22:49.460 --> 00:22:52.079
like hungry just like carnage filled like look

00:22:52.079 --> 00:22:54.910
in his face He looks at you and just kind of

00:22:54.910 --> 00:22:57.690
like fully takes the like let's fucking go so

00:22:57.690 --> 00:23:02.089
I do the same stance Roll for initiative. Oh,

00:23:02.210 --> 00:23:06.470
yeah, you guys asked for it. Oh, okay Oh, yeah,

00:23:06.529 --> 00:23:12.849
oh, yeah 20 Ready I wouldn't roll for initiative.

00:23:14.549 --> 00:23:25.450
It was 18 plus 2 6 five plus one i'm sorry this

00:23:25.450 --> 00:23:29.690
is gonna get interesting oh it is oh i'm sure

00:23:29.690 --> 00:23:33.029
he's tough you said he's invisible he was and

00:23:33.029 --> 00:23:34.950
so he broke the line and then he was like so

00:23:34.950 --> 00:23:37.289
he wasn't in the sarcophagus no he was not he

00:23:37.289 --> 00:23:39.309
was outside of it just kind of stuck inside this

00:23:39.309 --> 00:23:44.549
circle so this uh this creature forms and makes

00:23:44.549 --> 00:23:46.910
this like primal carnage like stance to come

00:23:46.910 --> 00:23:51.390
at you uh he looks like he's got he's a frog

00:23:51.390 --> 00:23:54.150
he looks like a frog but humanoid bipedal with

00:23:54.150 --> 00:23:57.630
long arms and huge like protruding talons like

00:23:57.630 --> 00:23:59.809
coming out of his hands like just giant spiky

00:23:59.809 --> 00:24:05.529
claws uh he's got like wing gill or uh what do

00:24:05.529 --> 00:24:07.130
you call those fans like looks like a dilophosaurus

00:24:07.130 --> 00:24:10.910
frill like on his uh armpits webbed arms yes

00:24:10.910 --> 00:24:14.789
spikes down his back he is definitely a beast

00:24:14.789 --> 00:24:19.670
so all right dude crystal initiative sorry 20.

00:24:20.319 --> 00:24:25.539
Twenty. Fleece stick? Six. Six. Miss Muffin?

00:24:26.240 --> 00:24:31.799
Eleventy. Eleventy. You got a two plus three.

00:24:33.259 --> 00:24:37.680
He's hit. He's hit. Is he hit? Is he hit, boys?

00:24:38.200 --> 00:24:41.799
Duke, you're first. All right. First takes first.

00:24:41.960 --> 00:24:48.940
Rage. Rage. Okay. Fuck. All right. Miss Muffin?

00:24:50.700 --> 00:24:52.259
And how far away is he? Because it's a five foot

00:24:52.259 --> 00:24:57.019
radius around you, right? Yeah. So, Miss Muffin,

00:24:57.099 --> 00:25:00.259
make me a deck save. I want to tell you, Miss

00:25:00.259 --> 00:25:04.319
Muffin, you mess with big boys. Go watch your

00:25:04.319 --> 00:25:07.619
own. 18. She's good. She slipped it. You slipped

00:25:07.619 --> 00:25:09.500
it. You're good. You should know by now. When

00:25:09.500 --> 00:25:11.579
I go into a stance like that, you just get out

00:25:11.579 --> 00:25:17.619
of the way. It's coming. Okay. Yeah, you go full

00:25:17.619 --> 00:25:21.680
demon pop, the flames erupt around you. It does

00:25:21.680 --> 00:25:24.119
not reach him. He is not close enough to be hit

00:25:24.119 --> 00:25:27.319
by the flames. So yeah, you pop your rage. What

00:25:27.319 --> 00:25:28.160
would you like to do now? I'm trying to remember

00:25:28.160 --> 00:25:30.980
what all extra stuff I have when I'm in rage.

00:25:31.859 --> 00:25:35.460
I think I have it wrote down. I don't have like

00:25:35.460 --> 00:25:38.420
a claw attack, I thought. Yes, you can. I don't

00:25:38.420 --> 00:25:40.359
remember the stats on it. Yeah, you get claws.

00:25:46.349 --> 00:25:49.970
You gain demonic rage, which is the same as rage,

00:25:50.109 --> 00:25:53.450
but you turn into a large demon, form giant claws,

00:25:53.690 --> 00:25:57.569
attacks, and you can fly. Yes. So the claws make

00:25:57.569 --> 00:26:01.549
it 1d8 plus strength bonus for a claw attack,

00:26:01.789 --> 00:26:03.910
like your unarmed strike, basically. Well, my

00:26:03.910 --> 00:26:07.869
normal unarmed strike bonus is plus 8. Yeah,

00:26:07.910 --> 00:26:12.259
so it would be that. One D10 plus eight. One

00:26:12.259 --> 00:26:15.400
D8. Oh, one D8. Yeah, one D8 plus eight. Instead

00:26:15.400 --> 00:26:17.700
of being an unarmed normal attack, you can use

00:26:17.700 --> 00:26:23.859
your claws to do extra damage. All right. Okay.

00:26:24.259 --> 00:26:27.660
So I'm going to go ahead with the sword. You

00:26:27.660 --> 00:26:29.140
still can use your sword. Oh, yeah. I'm definitely

00:26:29.140 --> 00:26:31.839
going to have a sword. All right. Take a swing

00:26:31.839 --> 00:26:41.880
at him? Yeah. Move. Uh, does a 14 hit? 14. Probably

00:26:41.880 --> 00:26:49.400
not. No. Nice. Second attack. Thunderclap. Oh

00:26:49.400 --> 00:26:55.579
boy. That is all on him for the rolling. Well,

00:26:55.599 --> 00:26:59.279
what do I do? I'll look at it one second. Each

00:26:59.279 --> 00:27:01.200
creature in a five -foot emanation originating

00:27:01.200 --> 00:27:03.480
from you must succeed a constitution saving throw

00:27:03.480 --> 00:27:07.769
or take one, well, minus... 2d6 of thunder damage

00:27:07.769 --> 00:27:12.210
so he needs to make a constitution saving yeah

00:27:12.210 --> 00:27:18.589
let me check on what the save is 13 13 yeah uh

00:27:18.589 --> 00:27:23.710
two plus three let's take a 2d6 then all right

00:27:23.710 --> 00:27:26.430
does thunder clap do anything special like knocking

00:27:26.430 --> 00:27:30.250
back does that like 100 foot sound like okay

00:27:30.250 --> 00:27:31.849
i didn't know they destroyed like objects and

00:27:31.849 --> 00:27:46.829
stuff i mean it is Thunder seven damage seven

00:27:46.829 --> 00:27:56.309
damage You uh you blast this like thunderclap

00:27:56.309 --> 00:28:00.250
of a Kind of hits him and you see like the frogs

00:28:00.250 --> 00:28:03.269
don't have like super good hearing so the thunder

00:28:03.269 --> 00:28:05.319
kind of like she rattles off of his head and

00:28:05.319 --> 00:28:09.420
does a little less less damage so yeah dude of

00:28:09.420 --> 00:28:12.700
course all right uh anything else i got something

00:28:12.700 --> 00:28:15.440
else for you let's say i think you do yeah you

00:28:15.440 --> 00:28:17.420
still got what are you still going so your turn

00:28:17.420 --> 00:28:20.940
stuff no i use both actions all right miss muffin

00:28:20.940 --> 00:28:25.039
your turn i don't know what to do did you heal

00:28:25.039 --> 00:28:27.880
on the app or is that your health currently or

00:28:27.880 --> 00:28:31.599
did you what's your health app 31 okay wow all

00:28:31.599 --> 00:28:35.880
right your turn I'm gonna throw my own Cloak

00:28:35.880 --> 00:28:38.779
of Invisibility on. Oh, okay. Okay, roll me your

00:28:38.779 --> 00:28:41.059
stealth, Jack, with advantage. Stealthy. You

00:28:41.059 --> 00:28:47.599
should've healed the fuck up more. With advantage.

00:28:48.920 --> 00:28:54.519
16 plus 10, 26. 26? Good God. He's not gonna

00:28:54.519 --> 00:28:57.279
fuck with me. No, no. You're invisible and you

00:28:57.279 --> 00:29:01.000
were hidden good. And now, do I still get a bonus

00:29:01.000 --> 00:29:04.279
action? I believe it was your action to use invisibility.

00:29:05.059 --> 00:29:07.339
So you do get a bonus action, yes. Can I use

00:29:07.339 --> 00:29:10.799
that to take a potion? Yes, you can. Let me see

00:29:10.799 --> 00:29:18.980
if I still have one. Potion of healing 3, yes.

00:29:19.740 --> 00:29:21.940
That's a potion of healing, so that one will

00:29:21.940 --> 00:29:34.119
be... 2d4 plus 2. oh wait only two plus two so

00:29:34.119 --> 00:29:39.220
seven okay better than none flea stick your turn

00:29:39.220 --> 00:29:42.359
you're in the doorway you kind of being inside

00:29:42.359 --> 00:29:44.859
the doorway averted the explosion of dew crystals

00:29:44.859 --> 00:29:48.599
fiery so now you can kind of do what you want

00:29:48.599 --> 00:29:51.480
when you step in i'll show you uh all right well

00:29:51.480 --> 00:29:54.200
i'm a fire guiding bolt okay yeah he's 30 feet

00:29:54.200 --> 00:29:55.980
from you so you can are you still doing it from

00:29:55.980 --> 00:29:58.420
the doorway yeah i'm gonna step in here okay

00:29:58.420 --> 00:30:01.799
all right step in here and give me a red bolt

00:30:02.160 --> 00:30:07.559
Don't step on her hair. Fuck. 10. 10? No. Spiritual

00:30:07.559 --> 00:30:14.099
weapon. In the shape of a frog giggy. Frog D?

00:30:14.599 --> 00:30:18.640
Frog gig. Oh, frog gig. No. It's time to get

00:30:18.640 --> 00:30:22.319
frog gigging. What the fuck? 12. Roll with advantage.

00:30:23.119 --> 00:30:29.400
To hit? Yeah. No, when I hit. Shit, he has rules.

00:30:29.819 --> 00:30:30.839
Oh, yeah. You guys are going to have to roll

00:30:30.839 --> 00:30:35.920
high. Alright his turn and it looks like it's

00:30:35.920 --> 00:30:52.839
new crystal up front good thing So Duke as you

00:30:52.839 --> 00:30:57.180
get close to this this this slad gray slad frog

00:30:57.180 --> 00:31:00.869
creature you notice a gem like lodged into his

00:31:00.869 --> 00:31:03.910
forehead kind of just like glowing you see it

00:31:03.910 --> 00:31:05.869
kind of like it looks almost like it's like manipulating

00:31:05.869 --> 00:31:08.450
brain like it's like like you know what i mean

00:31:08.450 --> 00:31:10.990
like fire neurons and stuff inside of it important

00:31:10.990 --> 00:31:13.829
uh so yeah you see that so let's see what he's

00:31:13.829 --> 00:31:20.190
gonna do all right so he's going to he's going

00:31:20.190 --> 00:31:23.369
to do a multi -attack that's one bite two calls

00:31:23.369 --> 00:31:30.829
okay three plus seven no call attack 6 plus 7.

00:31:32.170 --> 00:31:36.869
Another claw attack. 19 plus 7. Okay, that is

00:31:36.869 --> 00:31:44.470
1d10 plus 3 slashing damage. I'm glad he didn't

00:31:44.470 --> 00:31:50.049
hit. 6 plus 3 damage from his claw. Luckily he

00:31:50.049 --> 00:31:52.450
didn't hit with the other two attacks. In reaction,

00:31:52.829 --> 00:32:02.720
I'm going to use Hellish Rebuke. Let's see. Yeah,

00:32:02.859 --> 00:32:04.400
the creature that damaged you is momentarily

00:32:04.400 --> 00:32:06.579
surrounded by green flames. It makes a dexterity

00:32:06.579 --> 00:32:11.420
saving throw of DC 13, or it takes 2d10 fire

00:32:11.420 --> 00:32:14.140
damage on a failed save and half as much on successful.

00:32:14.519 --> 00:32:20.839
Okay. 14 plus 3. Yeah, successful. So you take

00:32:20.839 --> 00:32:29.509
1d10. Okay. 1d10 halved. No, it was 2D10. Well,

00:32:29.509 --> 00:32:32.509
I can do 2D10 and then half. So yeah, let me

00:32:32.509 --> 00:32:35.910
check. You might get more of that. Yeah, yeah.

00:32:38.349 --> 00:32:46.650
So 9, 4, so 13, half. We'll just call it 6. Alright,

00:32:47.009 --> 00:32:49.769
yeah, the Hellish Rebuke is green flames, you

00:32:49.769 --> 00:32:52.990
said? It is a frog type, which is aquatic. And

00:32:52.990 --> 00:32:56.819
that's fire. Green flames, yeah. So I didn't

00:32:56.819 --> 00:32:58.940
know if it would do increased damage on him.

00:32:59.619 --> 00:33:02.380
What a turdball. So yeah, this green flame kind

00:33:02.380 --> 00:33:05.859
of warps around him and he's kind of like squirming

00:33:05.859 --> 00:33:08.160
in it as it's kind of just burning him. That

00:33:08.160 --> 00:33:12.119
was your turn, correct? No, that was his turn.

00:33:12.180 --> 00:33:16.039
So now it's your turn. Yes. Now I'm going to

00:33:16.039 --> 00:33:17.859
take that greatsword and I'm going to swing it

00:33:17.859 --> 00:33:21.599
right at his fucking dot on his head. His big

00:33:21.599 --> 00:33:26.420
old crystal. His Jimmy. His jinnies. His family

00:33:26.420 --> 00:33:33.839
jewel. His family jewel. 17 hit? No. What? Yeah,

00:33:33.880 --> 00:33:35.259
no, it won't. I was like, what the fuck's he

00:33:35.259 --> 00:33:37.859
marrying off? It will not. 17 won't hit? No.

00:33:37.980 --> 00:33:43.339
Okay, we're doing it again. Okay. How about a...

00:33:43.339 --> 00:33:46.980
Well, hang on. How about a 20 fucking four? Were

00:33:46.980 --> 00:33:48.680
you trying to hit the jinn, or were you trying

00:33:48.680 --> 00:33:51.390
to hit him? I was aiming for the gym, but if

00:33:51.390 --> 00:33:53.049
it hit him in the fucking chin, I wouldn't really

00:33:53.049 --> 00:33:54.930
care all that much. It missed him, but I didn't

00:33:54.930 --> 00:33:56.410
know if you were trying to hit the gym specifically,

00:33:56.609 --> 00:33:57.970
like trying to bust it, or if you were trying

00:33:57.970 --> 00:34:00.470
to just... I mean, if I knock his head off...

00:34:00.470 --> 00:34:03.309
That's too simple, so I just didn't know. I would

00:34:03.309 --> 00:34:05.289
say the second one definitely hits him if you're

00:34:05.289 --> 00:34:07.869
hitting him. Well, I mean, I was really aiming

00:34:07.869 --> 00:34:09.809
for gym, I guess. All right, if you want to hit

00:34:09.809 --> 00:34:12.550
the gym, you would hit him. Okay, then, yeah.

00:34:12.730 --> 00:34:20.090
Okay. That's crazy he's got a gym going in his

00:34:20.090 --> 00:34:22.369
forehead it's like controlling your brainwaves

00:34:22.369 --> 00:34:34.650
yeah, I was hoping to hit it Let's see So four

00:34:34.650 --> 00:34:38.570
plus six ten damage ten damage to the gym yes

00:34:38.570 --> 00:34:42.230
That first one. Yeah. So yeah, you hit this thing

00:34:42.230 --> 00:34:44.980
and it's like you feel it like kind of like that's

00:34:44.980 --> 00:34:47.920
like budge a bit and you see him kind of like

00:34:47.920 --> 00:34:52.380
roll around for a minute and be incredibly stunned

00:34:52.380 --> 00:34:55.880
so for his next turn he will be stunned um because

00:34:55.880 --> 00:34:58.039
you actually did a good chunk of smack to the

00:34:58.039 --> 00:35:00.500
rock to the gym that's controlling the brain

00:35:00.500 --> 00:35:02.179
does that mean he's stunned for my second attack

00:35:02.179 --> 00:35:05.179
yes so you hit with it anyways if you want to

00:35:05.179 --> 00:35:07.800
keep the roll you did yeah yeah i'll keep that

00:35:07.800 --> 00:35:10.519
yeah so you can hit do your damage all right

00:35:12.460 --> 00:35:17.920
Three plus six, nine damage. I guess, yeah. All

00:35:17.920 --> 00:35:20.860
right, nine damage as he's kind of just like

00:35:20.860 --> 00:35:23.199
squirming and his brain's starting to get a little

00:35:23.199 --> 00:35:26.559
fried there. Is that all your turns? Yeah, that's

00:35:26.559 --> 00:35:31.300
all. Miss Muffin, your turn. Question. Answer.

00:35:32.019 --> 00:35:36.920
Will my gem of brightness affect this demonic

00:35:36.920 --> 00:35:39.880
creature? I can't tell you that, and you don't

00:35:39.880 --> 00:35:42.699
know if this thing's demonic. It was just kind

00:35:42.699 --> 00:35:45.119
of sealed in a demonic pentagram. I think it's

00:35:45.119 --> 00:35:48.280
more spectral than something weird. There's more

00:35:48.280 --> 00:35:50.619
work here that you guys do not know. So I can

00:35:50.619 --> 00:35:53.239
command a word. Actually, the name is spectral.

00:35:53.380 --> 00:35:56.659
It's like some fucking cyborg frog. What would

00:35:56.659 --> 00:36:01.480
you like? I can command the gem to shine a beam

00:36:01.480 --> 00:36:05.239
of light at... Hold on, let me read it again.

00:36:05.300 --> 00:36:08.039
The second command word expends one charge and

00:36:08.039 --> 00:36:11.059
causes the gem to fire a brilliant beam of...

00:36:11.659 --> 00:36:14.500
Lie at one creature that you can see within 60

00:36:14.500 --> 00:36:16.960
feet of you the creature must succeed on a DC

00:36:16.960 --> 00:36:21.019
15 Constitution safe throw or become blinded

00:36:21.019 --> 00:36:26.539
for a minute and then The creature can repeat

00:36:26.539 --> 00:36:29.119
the saving throw at the end of each of its turns

00:36:29.119 --> 00:36:34.880
ending the effect of itself on a success or I

00:36:34.880 --> 00:36:39.699
can say a third command that Expends five charges

00:36:39.699 --> 00:36:42.659
and causes the gem to flare with blinding light

00:36:42.659 --> 00:36:46.280
and a 30 -foot cone. Each creature in the cone

00:36:46.280 --> 00:36:50.980
must make a saving throw. So you can do a straight

00:36:50.980 --> 00:36:52.960
line at one creature or you can hit a cone at

00:36:52.960 --> 00:36:54.460
a creature. So you can do like a laser beam or

00:36:54.460 --> 00:36:56.639
a flashlight. I got a gem on my forehead too,

00:36:56.679 --> 00:36:59.039
by the way. So we could have been using this.

00:36:59.579 --> 00:37:02.219
She's got the gem of brightness. Oh, okay. She

00:37:02.219 --> 00:37:06.320
has it. So can I shine a beam at him and see

00:37:06.320 --> 00:37:09.460
if it blinds him? Yeah. Okay, so what do I do

00:37:09.460 --> 00:37:12.519
just say it yeah? What's the command word you're

00:37:12.519 --> 00:37:15.079
gonna give this thing to activate the laser beam?

00:37:15.139 --> 00:37:17.219
I was gonna say do I have to come up with a command

00:37:17.219 --> 00:37:19.539
word cuz it's like it needs three command words

00:37:19.539 --> 00:37:22.360
I would I think there is probably real command

00:37:22.360 --> 00:37:24.980
words to run them, but I don't give a shit like

00:37:24.980 --> 00:37:28.960
Nate's was these nuts for One thing so much because

00:37:28.960 --> 00:37:30.900
your own command word keep that in your mind

00:37:30.900 --> 00:37:33.880
or write it down So meow is gonna be the laser

00:37:33.880 --> 00:37:37.369
beam light. Okay. That's my javelins Yeah. It's

00:37:37.369 --> 00:37:41.309
activation word. So you just let out a roar of

00:37:41.309 --> 00:37:45.570
a mighty meow. Meow! And this laser beam comes

00:37:45.570 --> 00:37:47.650
to life and blasts up this thing. What does he

00:37:47.650 --> 00:37:50.389
got to do? A constitution saving throw? DC 15

00:37:50.389 --> 00:37:53.389
constitution saving throw. That's a pretty good

00:37:53.389 --> 00:37:58.010
save number too. Yeah, he better not. He got

00:37:58.010 --> 00:38:02.119
an 18 plus 3, so he saves. He blocked this. He

00:38:02.119 --> 00:38:04.860
covered his eyes. Did he roll with disadvantage?

00:38:05.440 --> 00:38:10.300
No. He said, cat. He blocked it. Okay, what else

00:38:10.300 --> 00:38:12.440
would you like to do? I think you have a bonus

00:38:12.440 --> 00:38:18.000
action, bud. Stab the crystal. If I do the cone,

00:38:18.059 --> 00:38:20.179
it's just five charges at him because there's

00:38:20.179 --> 00:38:22.260
no other creature. Yeah. You already used your

00:38:22.260 --> 00:38:25.000
action. Me and everyone else around him. So use

00:38:25.000 --> 00:38:27.039
my bonus action to do it again? No, you can only

00:38:27.039 --> 00:38:29.880
use an action to use it. Aw. She's trying to

00:38:29.880 --> 00:38:32.860
blind everyone around here. Well, I'm still invisible

00:38:32.860 --> 00:38:35.440
and all he saw was a beam of light come from

00:38:35.440 --> 00:38:38.780
me and a meow. So I'm just going to relocate

00:38:38.780 --> 00:38:43.659
myself quietly. Relocate quietly. Make me another

00:38:43.659 --> 00:38:46.380
stealth check since you attacked and lit a light

00:38:46.380 --> 00:38:50.019
beam from you. Close range. A stealth check?

00:38:50.119 --> 00:38:51.539
Yeah, make me another stealth check since you're

00:38:51.539 --> 00:38:53.420
using a light beam and then running with your

00:38:53.420 --> 00:38:55.460
invisibility cloak still on. Can I roll with

00:38:55.460 --> 00:38:57.579
advantage? I think you can, yeah, because your

00:38:57.579 --> 00:38:59.480
stealth proficiency is doubled. Can I roll with

00:38:59.480 --> 00:39:03.579
advantage by getting a nat 1? No. No, you can't.

00:39:05.440 --> 00:39:08.300
So, you, uh, I don't think you have an advantage,

00:39:08.380 --> 00:39:14.300
actually. I think it's... What happens? You have

00:39:14.300 --> 00:39:16.320
just double proficiency. So, I move and he still,

00:39:16.360 --> 00:39:19.300
like, guesses where I move to? So, nat 1, you,

00:39:19.360 --> 00:39:22.179
uh, you're, like, laser beam of light, and then

00:39:22.179 --> 00:39:25.800
you take off running. to relocate and you trip

00:39:25.800 --> 00:39:27.480
again because your feet are just not working

00:39:27.480 --> 00:39:28.960
with you and your cloak kind of does a front

00:39:28.960 --> 00:39:31.099
flip over you and falls off your back and you

00:39:31.099 --> 00:39:33.260
roll and you hit your head on the sarcophagus

00:39:33.260 --> 00:39:35.440
roll up and roll next to the sarcophagus but

00:39:35.440 --> 00:39:37.599
your cloak is off of you on the ground and you

00:39:37.599 --> 00:39:43.480
are closer to the gray slab yes and out of things

00:39:43.480 --> 00:39:45.199
i can't do anything you're ready to get smart

00:39:45.199 --> 00:39:47.420
you are about 10 feet from him now since you

00:39:47.420 --> 00:39:49.679
tripped and rolled forward adam lost your clothes

00:39:49.679 --> 00:39:53.590
guys i suck save me uh yeah Please take your

00:39:53.590 --> 00:39:57.670
turn. Alright, Sacred Flame. Sacred Flame! No!

00:39:58.050 --> 00:40:01.869
Well, we'll see. Need a dex roll for you. Am

00:40:01.869 --> 00:40:05.349
I good? That's a 15 plus 3. Fucker. This guy's

00:40:05.349 --> 00:40:08.250
rolling good. Alright, now I'm going to frog

00:40:08.250 --> 00:40:11.090
gig him right into his little gym. Give him the

00:40:11.090 --> 00:40:15.690
frog gig. A little spiritual frog gig. 15 plus

00:40:15.690 --> 00:40:30.820
8, 23. 23? Yep. Damn, yeah. That was it. So 7

00:40:30.820 --> 00:40:36.280
plus 5, so 12. 12 damage. Boom, as this frog

00:40:36.280 --> 00:40:37.980
gig comes in and sticks him and he has like a

00:40:37.980 --> 00:40:42.800
PTSD moment for a second. Was that your turn?

00:40:42.880 --> 00:40:49.340
Yeah. Yeah. It is his turn. He is stunned. So

00:40:49.340 --> 00:40:51.599
that's his turn to be done. Do crystal, your

00:40:51.599 --> 00:40:54.420
turn. Do what I do. Because he was stunned for

00:40:54.420 --> 00:41:00.619
a round. So I have to crystal. Is an 18 hit?

00:41:01.019 --> 00:41:07.820
Yes. Just barely. Just barely. 6 plus 6, 12.

00:41:08.059 --> 00:41:11.079
12 damage? Yep. Is that your sword, right? Yep.

00:41:11.480 --> 00:41:22.239
I'm running it back. 18, is that it? Yes. 7 plus

00:41:22.239 --> 00:41:25.840
6, 13. 13. Good damage to him. You guys are taking

00:41:25.840 --> 00:41:28.380
chunks out of the frog man. He's just kind of

00:41:28.380 --> 00:41:31.840
screeching. croaking swinging claws back but

00:41:31.840 --> 00:41:33.900
that crystal's looking rough crystal is still

00:41:33.900 --> 00:41:36.000
in him kind of cracked and shifted but he's he's

00:41:36.000 --> 00:41:38.760
functioning miss muffins your turn um the third

00:41:38.760 --> 00:41:42.539
command word is cone of shame cone of shame so

00:41:42.539 --> 00:41:47.260
you're doing the whole cone yeah right on i'm

00:41:47.260 --> 00:41:50.559
ten feet from him yeah so let's do it all right

00:41:50.559 --> 00:41:55.460
it won't get duke it'll get him only now he's

00:41:55.460 --> 00:41:58.530
in a cone i'm a dude face to face i'm sword fighting

00:41:58.530 --> 00:42:01.150
him okay so constitution save it's been said

00:42:01.150 --> 00:42:03.769
you just set off you just caused the first light

00:42:03.769 --> 00:42:06.849
atomic explosion the first atomic explosion in

00:42:06.849 --> 00:42:13.230
history all right so he got an eight uh that's

00:42:13.230 --> 00:42:17.690
not a 15. eight plus three oh wait the third

00:42:17.690 --> 00:42:26.239
one said something different Each creature in

00:42:26.239 --> 00:42:29.340
the cone must make a saving throw as if struck

00:42:29.340 --> 00:42:33.280
by the beam created with the second command word.

00:42:33.599 --> 00:42:34.780
Okay, so it's still the same thing. Oh yeah,

00:42:34.840 --> 00:42:39.840
never mind. My bad. What do you feel? Con. So

00:42:39.840 --> 00:42:46.579
you need a 15. My bad. Fail. No! You got a 13.

00:42:46.780 --> 00:42:49.519
No. They both failed, so they're both blinded,

00:42:49.519 --> 00:42:51.900
right? For a minute. Yeah, for a minute. A minute

00:42:51.900 --> 00:42:56.110
is 10 turns. My bad. Okay, Duke Crystal doesn't

00:42:56.110 --> 00:42:57.869
need to see. Okay, so you were both swinging

00:42:57.869 --> 00:43:00.630
at disadvantage, Duke and the slad, but hey.

00:43:00.829 --> 00:43:02.610
If I hit one of you with my sword, that's on

00:43:02.610 --> 00:43:04.809
you. Well, I blinded him, so now please take

00:43:04.809 --> 00:43:38.949
care of it. Please take your turn. Yeah, I'm

00:43:38.949 --> 00:43:41.670
gonna do the whole just roll me a dex for sacred

00:43:41.670 --> 00:43:50.389
I'd say just give me double damage so it says

00:43:50.389 --> 00:43:55.429
2d8 All since you're on a net one so roll 48

00:44:02.090 --> 00:44:09.130
Four, two, five, six, 11. I have scroll of comprehending

00:44:09.130 --> 00:44:15.429
languages. 11 and seven. My bad. 18. 18? Yep.

00:44:17.150 --> 00:44:21.789
Damage? Yeah. Okay. Yep. And then I'm going to

00:44:21.789 --> 00:44:27.469
go up and stab him in the beamy eye or the gem

00:44:27.469 --> 00:44:31.219
again. Aim for the gym with my whipping. Okay

00:44:31.219 --> 00:44:35.320
swing at the gym and that's a fail eight plus

00:44:35.320 --> 00:44:52.159
three All right Well, it's blind also All great,

00:44:52.159 --> 00:44:55.239
it's gonna fucking x -ray vision speaking of

00:44:57.769 --> 00:45:02.889
I have an idea. Yeah. No, it's not good for you.

00:45:03.929 --> 00:45:08.570
Well? I would advise staying away from me. Don't

00:45:08.570 --> 00:45:10.849
get five foot within proximity of me. Well, I'm

00:45:10.849 --> 00:45:16.150
ten foot from the thing. Okay. So. Demon. You

00:45:16.150 --> 00:45:18.369
see this thing kind of just like blinded. Okay,

00:45:18.389 --> 00:45:19.769
well, he's just going to make a multi -attack

00:45:19.769 --> 00:45:22.329
if you crystal them again. So, bite with disadvantage

00:45:22.329 --> 00:45:24.050
and then two claw attacks with disadvantage.

00:45:24.409 --> 00:45:28.590
I saw you step. Okay. 13 plus 7 with the bite.

00:45:30.769 --> 00:45:32.769
He ain't at a disadvantage. He's blind. Yes,

00:45:32.769 --> 00:45:33.989
he is at a disadvantage. Sorry, I forgot. I was

00:45:33.989 --> 00:45:35.909
like, what the fuck is going on? He's just bullying

00:45:35.909 --> 00:45:37.909
me like Kenshi over here. You got a 19 on the

00:45:37.909 --> 00:45:41.289
other one, so. 17 plus 7. Okay, sure, yeah, it

00:45:41.289 --> 00:45:44.070
is. Okay, claw. I don't even know how the fuck

00:45:44.070 --> 00:45:45.690
he knows where I'm at. I don't want to fail.

00:45:46.550 --> 00:45:50.170
11 plus 7 on the second claw. No, disadvantage.

00:45:50.429 --> 00:45:53.449
Damn it. Alright, so he only hits with the bite.

00:45:53.929 --> 00:46:00.050
Good. Okay, 1d6 plus... Five plus three. See

00:46:00.050 --> 00:46:02.130
if I can chomp down on you with some frog teeth,

00:46:02.269 --> 00:46:05.690
baby. Frogs don't have teeth. Shh. This frog

00:46:05.690 --> 00:46:08.349
has teeth. No. Because I said he does. Duke Crystal,

00:46:08.429 --> 00:46:13.429
your turn. Alright. Thunderclap. Thunderclap!

00:46:14.929 --> 00:46:16.989
Okay, what is that? Well, I guess it didn't really

00:46:16.989 --> 00:46:20.090
work on him. Oh, yeah. Well, not if it's ineffective

00:46:20.090 --> 00:46:25.170
against him. How much damage was reduced from

00:46:25.170 --> 00:46:30.500
it? Half. This was just a half upgrade. Fuck,

00:46:30.619 --> 00:46:32.800
I'm gonna swing at disadvantage. Well, now I'm

00:46:32.800 --> 00:46:38.219
not, actually. I'm gonna do... Let's do Reckless

00:46:38.219 --> 00:46:41.000
Attack. There you go. What does that do to the

00:46:41.000 --> 00:46:43.320
game? It gives me advantage, so it leaves the

00:46:43.320 --> 00:46:49.519
playing field. Alright. 12 plus 9. Plus the 9.

00:46:49.579 --> 00:46:56.460
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah! Yeah. 3 and 6. 9 damage. Okay,

00:46:56.460 --> 00:46:59.440
same thing again. Three, six, nine. Damn, she's

00:46:59.440 --> 00:47:05.920
fine. Uh, 17? 17? No, one shy. All right. Ms.

00:47:05.940 --> 00:47:08.800
Muffin, your turn. You're 10 feet from him. Cloak's

00:47:08.800 --> 00:47:11.800
on the ground, not attached to your back. Grabs

00:47:11.800 --> 00:47:15.820
cloak, puts cloak back on, relocates. What? Grabs

00:47:15.820 --> 00:47:20.639
my cloak, puts it back on, relocates. Okay, all

00:47:20.639 --> 00:47:24.059
right. Pick it up and you put it on. I can still

00:47:24.059 --> 00:47:27.329
dash away. Yeah, you can dash if you want. Yeah,

00:47:28.050 --> 00:47:32.389
I need to get safer. Away from this. Okay. So

00:47:32.389 --> 00:47:34.389
you're just running away? Yeah, the rest of what

00:47:34.389 --> 00:47:39.969
I can run away. Okay. To get safe. To be safe.

00:47:40.070 --> 00:47:42.710
Which way are you running? Like south? Well,

00:47:42.809 --> 00:47:45.969
my phone won't let me quote the map. So, you

00:47:45.969 --> 00:47:49.170
tell me. Okay, you're running south. As far as

00:47:49.170 --> 00:47:51.710
your movement being taken. Okay. Now you're far

00:47:51.710 --> 00:47:56.070
away from him. Yay. And that was your turn. You're

00:47:56.070 --> 00:47:58.530
not disappointed. You did nothing. What do you

00:47:58.530 --> 00:48:01.889
want me to do? Attack him. Please take your turn.

00:48:02.050 --> 00:48:04.190
What the fuck did you do? Alright, say your plan.

00:48:04.750 --> 00:48:08.010
What the fuck? You're the most fucking rogue

00:48:08.010 --> 00:48:10.750
-like rogue I've ever seen. You're just waiting

00:48:10.750 --> 00:48:13.289
for us to die so you can rob us and shit at the

00:48:13.289 --> 00:48:17.230
merchant. Literally. Please take your turn. Alright,

00:48:17.369 --> 00:48:19.789
say your plan. You're the person that's like,

00:48:19.849 --> 00:48:21.869
I'm your ride or die. And as soon as it's a die

00:48:21.869 --> 00:48:25.429
moment, you're like, 16 plus 3. Fuck you. Spiritual

00:48:25.429 --> 00:48:36.510
weapon. 9 plus 8. That hits, right? No. That's

00:48:36.510 --> 00:48:43.690
one shot. 17, 18. You mother piece of shit. Alright,

00:48:43.809 --> 00:48:50.289
Grace Ladd's turn. Yeah, for 10 turns. It'll

00:48:50.289 --> 00:48:52.340
be for a while. Probably dead before okay, so

00:48:52.340 --> 00:48:56.119
he's going to take a single great sword swinging

00:48:56.119 --> 00:48:59.800
you He has a great sword. Yes. He's my spiritual

00:48:59.800 --> 00:49:21.750
weapons in the way Four plus seven No Reckless

00:49:21.750 --> 00:49:27.730
tech. Oh shit, that'll even him too. You gotta

00:49:27.730 --> 00:49:30.889
remember that, I ain't gonna tell you. Let's

00:49:30.889 --> 00:49:33.769
see, that one ain't gonna do it. Oh, nine to

00:49:33.769 --> 00:49:38.150
nine. Nine to nine, eighteen. Yep. On the money.

00:49:38.590 --> 00:49:43.150
On the money. Ten damage. I was about to grab

00:49:43.150 --> 00:49:45.210
my dice and roll for some reason. Yep, ten damage.

00:49:46.150 --> 00:49:48.789
Slicing dice, taking chunks again, as Miss Malcolm

00:49:48.789 --> 00:49:50.989
watches from the wall. And that one's definitely

00:49:50.989 --> 00:49:56.989
a hit. 18 plus 9? Yeah. Yeah. Maybe. And 8 damage.

00:49:57.409 --> 00:50:01.769
8 damage. Okay. He's bleeding. All over the floor.

00:50:01.769 --> 00:50:03.909
It's filling in the lines of where there was...

00:50:03.909 --> 00:50:05.989
Can I smell it? Oh yeah, you can smell it. You're

00:50:05.989 --> 00:50:09.289
in demon mode. Your body... I'm not blind anymore.

00:50:09.630 --> 00:50:13.190
Your sword's sucking it up. I can smell his blood

00:50:13.190 --> 00:50:15.489
leaking out of him. It's like... It's nothing.

00:50:15.670 --> 00:50:18.679
It's your turn. He's there. Alrighty. I want

00:50:18.679 --> 00:50:21.679
to equip my cloak and go invisible. Okay, give

00:50:21.679 --> 00:50:26.079
me a stealth check. Then I'm going to spend my

00:50:26.079 --> 00:50:30.719
whole turn running to a hiding spot. 24. And

00:50:30.719 --> 00:50:35.599
then I'm going to pull my poison dagger out and

00:50:35.599 --> 00:50:38.679
stab him with it. You can't because your poison

00:50:38.679 --> 00:50:40.960
dagger is in your main hand. That's an action.

00:50:41.219 --> 00:50:45.059
You can use your bonus hand offhand dagger, but

00:50:45.059 --> 00:50:49.190
that's just a plus one attack. Do that and your

00:50:49.190 --> 00:50:51.070
poison time to recharge because you used it last

00:50:51.070 --> 00:50:54.369
time ever so it failed on skeleton and it has

00:50:54.369 --> 00:50:59.869
to recharge each dawn So are you gonna take your

00:50:59.869 --> 00:51:04.309
off -hand attack? Okay, so you're just gonna

00:51:04.309 --> 00:51:08.110
stop your turn Okay All right, please stick.

00:51:08.210 --> 00:51:10.570
Let's take it your turn. It's up to you and Duke

00:51:10.570 --> 00:51:17.150
so then I'm blowing and the big blind And one

00:51:17.150 --> 00:51:18.489
that you don't know where it's at because she's

00:51:18.489 --> 00:51:20.730
invisible hiding in the wall. I'm over here like...

00:51:20.730 --> 00:51:24.289
I'm trying to use echolocation and blood scent

00:51:24.289 --> 00:51:29.710
to find him. Like Daredevil. I can see him with

00:51:29.710 --> 00:51:32.750
my ears. I can see him with my ears and smell

00:51:32.750 --> 00:51:35.570
him with my nose. Where's your godly weapons?

00:51:35.909 --> 00:51:37.829
I didn't even attempt to aim at the crystal.

00:51:37.889 --> 00:51:41.489
I was like, I'm blind. I'd be lucky to hit him.

00:51:41.710 --> 00:52:09.550
And he's a big frog. This will fix you, right?

00:52:10.070 --> 00:52:12.230
And then I can attack with spiritual weapon.

00:52:14.969 --> 00:52:17.090
I got you guys. Yeah, he's probably like humanoid,

00:52:17.130 --> 00:52:19.449
it looks like. Yeah, he's like humanoidish kind

00:52:19.449 --> 00:52:22.369
of style. Just beefy. Alright, so, are we ready?

00:52:22.630 --> 00:52:28.210
No. Yep. Take it away. Please take. Alright,

00:52:28.369 --> 00:52:32.949
so I used Lesser Restoration on Dookie Poo. Ooh,

00:52:33.030 --> 00:52:35.750
very good. Restore the eyesight of Dookie Poo.

00:52:35.969 --> 00:52:38.230
Very nice. Remove the poo from his eyes. Remove

00:52:38.230 --> 00:52:41.090
the poo from his eyes. Yeah, so do you feel this

00:52:41.090 --> 00:52:43.429
clarity of like, what does this look like? How

00:52:43.429 --> 00:52:46.739
does... How does the blindness get wiped away

00:52:46.739 --> 00:52:49.780
from Duke's eyes? You just see this dumpster

00:52:49.780 --> 00:52:53.039
juice materialize from the air and just smear

00:52:53.039 --> 00:52:55.800
around Duke's face, cleaning up all the trash.

00:52:55.920 --> 00:52:57.760
I knew he was going to say that! This dumpster

00:52:57.760 --> 00:52:59.599
juice, you just see this liquid kind of like,

00:52:59.699 --> 00:53:02.440
it's like you're blind in light, but you're seeing

00:53:02.440 --> 00:53:06.780
the streaks of trash just kind of streaking through

00:53:06.780 --> 00:53:08.900
your eyeballs and melting down through you, and

00:53:08.900 --> 00:53:11.059
then as it kind of sleeps away, your eyesight

00:53:11.059 --> 00:53:13.639
comes back. And you're left with a beautiful

00:53:13.639 --> 00:53:16.599
lavender scent. And you hear that self, uh, that

00:53:16.599 --> 00:53:18.340
conscious voice in your head, and you go, that

00:53:18.340 --> 00:53:22.139
was disgusting. You know what I picture? Like

00:53:22.139 --> 00:53:27.400
Patrick and Spongebob. Patrick and Spongebob

00:53:27.400 --> 00:53:30.039
when they have to find his ID in the dumpster,

00:53:30.159 --> 00:53:34.219
and Patrick's loving it. What was your, your

00:53:34.219 --> 00:53:39.500
spiritual weapon? Yeah, 15 plus 8, and then 1d8

00:53:39.500 --> 00:53:46.179
plus... What a crazy idea. Three! Three damage?

00:53:46.420 --> 00:53:48.599
Eight damage. Oh, eight damage. Okay. So, yeah,

00:53:48.659 --> 00:53:51.599
your spiritual frog gig kind of just sticks him

00:53:51.599 --> 00:53:53.460
in the ribs and he's like, ah, and you can tell

00:53:53.460 --> 00:53:56.840
another bleed spot plops out on the ground, but

00:53:56.840 --> 00:53:59.179
he's still barely standing. It's kind of like

00:53:59.179 --> 00:54:01.840
holding his ribs now, like trying to keep blood

00:54:01.840 --> 00:54:09.599
inside. But it's his turn. So... He chooses to

00:54:09.599 --> 00:54:15.110
give up and walk away. He does not. Okay. Fuck

00:54:15.110 --> 00:54:17.610
you, frog. I'm gonna throw pebbles and see if

00:54:17.610 --> 00:54:19.550
he thinks they're flies and tries to eat them.

00:54:19.849 --> 00:54:21.710
Okay, well, he's gonna take another great sword

00:54:21.710 --> 00:54:24.190
attack at you, Duke. I'm gonna fucking punish

00:54:24.190 --> 00:54:27.050
him. Hopefully he hits it. Seven plus seven.

00:54:27.269 --> 00:54:29.750
No, sit the fuck down. I don't want him to hit

00:54:29.750 --> 00:54:35.329
with it. Okay. He's black. My turn? Um. Um. Um.

00:54:35.389 --> 00:54:40.230
Yes. Yes. All right. I'm going to grapple the

00:54:40.230 --> 00:54:43.119
crystal. Oh, fuck, really? Yes, really. Do it.

00:54:43.360 --> 00:54:44.980
All right. You got, like, ripped out his forehead?

00:54:45.239 --> 00:54:48.519
Oh, yeah, I will if I grab ahold of it. The target

00:54:48.519 --> 00:54:51.579
must succeed on strength or dex. It chooses which.

00:54:52.300 --> 00:54:54.960
Saving throw, DC equals eight. Are you grappling

00:54:54.960 --> 00:54:58.380
him? No, the crystal directly. So you can try

00:54:58.380 --> 00:55:00.539
to, like, pull it out if you're wanting to do

00:55:00.539 --> 00:55:02.639
that. Yeah, that's what I'm trying to go for.

00:55:02.699 --> 00:55:05.599
But I have to successfully grapple before I can

00:55:05.599 --> 00:55:08.039
ask to... probably do that strength check are

00:55:08.039 --> 00:55:09.820
you going to let me incorporate it in one motion

00:55:09.820 --> 00:55:11.539
grapple because it's going to be like him trying

00:55:11.539 --> 00:55:13.960
to because he has yeah i have to get a hold of

00:55:13.960 --> 00:55:16.840
it yeah yeah so give me a grapple on the so he

00:55:16.840 --> 00:55:18.940
has to make it's you to choose the strength or

00:55:18.940 --> 00:55:22.780
dicks uh okay the dc eight plus proficiency bonus

00:55:22.780 --> 00:55:26.079
plus strength or it has grapple conditions so

00:55:26.079 --> 00:55:29.360
i'm guessing eight my proficiency bonus is three

00:55:29.360 --> 00:55:33.400
so eleven and my strength is plus five So he

00:55:33.400 --> 00:55:37.260
has to make a 16 DC of dex or strength. The strength

00:55:37.260 --> 00:55:38.500
and dex are the same, so I'm going to go strength.

00:55:38.780 --> 00:55:42.880
All right. Two plus three. I grabbed the fuck

00:55:42.880 --> 00:55:44.400
out of that crystal. You grabbed the fuck out

00:55:44.400 --> 00:55:48.360
of it. He's like... I got like a thumb and an

00:55:48.360 --> 00:55:51.460
eye socket. He's bleeding, so there's holes and

00:55:51.460 --> 00:55:52.880
chunks all over him, so you're just grabbing

00:55:52.880 --> 00:55:54.920
a hold of chunks. All right. Now you want to

00:55:54.920 --> 00:55:56.199
give him a strength check to rip it out of his

00:55:56.199 --> 00:56:00.559
forehead? Most definitely. Okay. Yes. Oh yeah

00:56:00.559 --> 00:56:01.860
you do because you actually raged. That's my

00:56:01.860 --> 00:56:04.539
favorite thing to see. Oh and he got the demon

00:56:04.539 --> 00:56:08.920
claws in the skin. Nice good bite on there. I'm

00:56:08.920 --> 00:56:12.039
picturing like Michael from Underworld. That

00:56:12.039 --> 00:56:18.099
big ass hand. What was it? 13. That's the best

00:56:18.099 --> 00:56:20.039
I got even on advantage. That will not do it.

00:56:20.099 --> 00:56:21.980
That will not do the strength of pulling it out.

00:56:22.039 --> 00:56:23.440
But you do still have him grapple. Yeah he has

00:56:23.440 --> 00:56:26.099
to break free of that grapple. Try to every turn.

00:56:26.519 --> 00:56:30.500
Okay so. Was that an action try to pull it out?

00:56:30.619 --> 00:56:34.360
Yeah. Okay. All right. That's nothing What happens

00:56:34.360 --> 00:56:36.860
if miss muffin runs up and grabs that grab and

00:56:36.860 --> 00:56:39.559
rips it out yourself? like helps like try to

00:56:39.559 --> 00:56:42.860
pull it out you can do a strength check with

00:56:42.860 --> 00:56:45.239
it well like grab my arm and tug on it because

00:56:45.239 --> 00:56:46.880
while i'm holding it i was gonna say it would

00:56:46.880 --> 00:56:48.760
look like that yeah like yeah if you want to

00:56:48.760 --> 00:56:50.960
try to rip it out too you can do it we're gonna

00:56:50.960 --> 00:56:53.019
do like everyone's behind me yeah like you can

00:56:53.019 --> 00:56:54.940
do it with advantage but it's gonna be a resident

00:56:54.940 --> 00:56:57.940
evil cutscene that's still gonna be like the

00:56:57.940 --> 00:57:01.960
avengers with fantasy's glove like yeah this

00:57:01.960 --> 00:57:05.639
picture like there's one on like Oh, Jill's chest.

00:57:05.840 --> 00:57:10.960
All that red spider thing. Where is my strength?

00:57:11.179 --> 00:57:13.719
I think that video game had influence on what

00:57:13.719 --> 00:57:18.179
I'm trying to do. Yes, negative one strength

00:57:18.179 --> 00:57:23.760
check with advantage. Eleven. It don't even budge.

00:57:23.880 --> 00:57:26.639
You're yanking on Duke's arm, and Duke's arm

00:57:26.639 --> 00:57:30.139
isn't budging. I was just like, I'm trying. I

00:57:30.139 --> 00:57:32.940
didn't even notice. She's back here hardly. Anything

00:57:32.940 --> 00:57:35.940
else? You got bonus action stuff. Take my off

00:57:35.940 --> 00:57:38.559
-hand dagger. You're up there. And stab him.

00:57:38.800 --> 00:57:40.559
You're going to stab him? Okay. We're going to

00:57:40.559 --> 00:57:42.320
stab him. Stab him somewhere really effective,

00:57:42.440 --> 00:57:45.139
like in his anus or something. I was going to

00:57:45.139 --> 00:57:47.239
say, what am I closest to to stab him if I was

00:57:47.239 --> 00:57:49.579
just holding the grapple? You're all right up

00:57:49.579 --> 00:57:51.320
on him. His body. I'm going to stab him right

00:57:51.320 --> 00:57:53.079
in the belly button. Okay, get him in the belly

00:57:53.079 --> 00:57:54.659
button. He's already missing lots of chunks.

00:57:54.800 --> 00:57:57.599
You got to roll for it. Oh. Attack. My bad. I

00:57:57.599 --> 00:58:01.260
forgot. You roll good and it's gonna go right

00:58:01.260 --> 00:58:04.920
in the belly button like a coin slot. 18 plus

00:58:04.920 --> 00:58:06.940
7 to hit. Oh, that went right in his belly button.

00:58:06.980 --> 00:58:08.659
Yeah, that went right in the belly button. And

00:58:08.659 --> 00:58:14.159
then it's 1d4 plus 4, so 7. 7 damage. Little

00:58:14.159 --> 00:58:17.179
did you know, that's his Achilles, his belly

00:58:17.179 --> 00:58:19.159
button. Yeah, you stick him right in the belly

00:58:19.159 --> 00:58:21.880
button. You just like, you hear this. gud roll

00:58:21.880 --> 00:58:26.019
just like screech and he's just trying to pull

00:58:26.019 --> 00:58:28.059
push duke off of him and pull a knife out of

00:58:28.059 --> 00:58:30.619
his belly button like he's freaking out and he's

00:58:30.619 --> 00:58:32.460
which is great because i'm planted you can feel

00:58:32.460 --> 00:58:34.639
it you can feel him like getting weak with the

00:58:34.639 --> 00:58:37.340
shaky knees uh but he's still standing so yeah

00:58:37.340 --> 00:58:44.949
i did stuff flea stick your turn all right I'm

00:58:44.949 --> 00:58:47.610
gonna turn my spiritual weapon into like a little

00:58:47.610 --> 00:58:50.289
electric claw. I'm gonna try to rip that fucker

00:58:50.289 --> 00:58:52.969
out myself. Can you give me Green Lantern? Yeah.

00:58:53.090 --> 00:58:55.150
Give me just a strength check. Yeah, that's what

00:58:55.150 --> 00:58:56.730
I was gonna say. I don't know. I don't know.

00:58:56.789 --> 00:58:58.269
Just give me a strength check off your stats.

00:58:58.670 --> 00:59:03.130
Because they don't have stats. Green Lantern.

00:59:03.210 --> 00:59:07.889
18 plus 2. Yeah, that will pop the whole gym

00:59:07.889 --> 00:59:12.250
right out. So, your Green Lantern style... uh,

00:59:12.550 --> 00:59:15.929
claw hand comes in and grabs his, uh, gem and

00:59:15.929 --> 00:59:18.570
starts parrying at it with the demon claw stuck

00:59:18.570 --> 00:59:21.510
to it, a knife in his belly button, and he popped

00:59:21.510 --> 00:59:23.750
this crystal out of his gem, his forehead, and

00:59:23.750 --> 00:59:26.989
he's just here and he's like, ah, ah, thank you.

00:59:27.210 --> 00:59:30.269
And he falls over and falls down and goes lifeless.

00:59:30.769 --> 00:59:33.710
Good. Goodbye. Yeah. This seems like something

00:59:33.710 --> 00:59:36.309
you want to hold on to, dude. I feel like if

00:59:36.309 --> 00:59:38.550
we would have pulled it out and not eviscerated

00:59:38.550 --> 00:59:42.070
his body. he might have been friendly yeah but

00:59:42.070 --> 00:59:45.510
he's yeah we blew chugs well i was blinded so

00:59:45.510 --> 00:59:50.750
i had to swing wildly this frog creature falls

00:59:50.750 --> 00:59:53.829
to the ground and uh flea stick you've got this

00:59:53.829 --> 00:59:56.869
well i guess your your spiritual claw is holding

00:59:56.869 --> 00:59:59.469
this gym so what would you guys like to do smash

00:59:59.469 --> 01:00:02.429
that thing smash it you gotta smash it all right

01:00:02.429 --> 01:00:05.050
yeah don't let dukes do the honors uh yeah i'm

01:00:05.050 --> 01:00:06.349
gonna say you probably smash it because you're

01:00:06.349 --> 01:00:09.260
a demon though you just keep stomping it so you

01:00:09.260 --> 01:00:11.559
keep stomping this thing and as it kind of shatters

01:00:11.559 --> 01:00:14.920
and busts you feel this like red just or you

01:00:14.920 --> 01:00:17.920
see this red ore of energy just like blow through

01:00:17.920 --> 01:00:19.900
the whole room and like through the passageways

01:00:19.900 --> 01:00:23.280
and out um but that's all you notice as you shatter

01:00:23.280 --> 01:00:27.400
it just dispelled its power i'm going to take

01:00:27.400 --> 01:00:29.699
a piece of that broken crystal and mend it into

01:00:29.699 --> 01:00:31.519
one thing that's dangerous attach it to your

01:00:31.519 --> 01:00:35.460
yeah okay you're gonna become a minion the flea

01:00:35.460 --> 01:00:37.239
stick yeah you kind of like put it up to your

01:00:37.239 --> 01:00:39.139
skull, and you're, like, doing your little fusing.

01:00:39.260 --> 01:00:41.639
And as it, like, connects to your skull, you

01:00:41.639 --> 01:00:43.460
just see this, like, little, like, red spark

01:00:43.460 --> 01:00:45.719
kind of fly through it, and then it kind of glows

01:00:45.719 --> 01:00:49.380
out. I just shake my head. Shake my head in disappointment.

01:00:49.760 --> 01:01:00.519
I'm collecting. You'll be sliding next. This

01:01:00.519 --> 01:01:02.880
episode of Dummies with Dice features Kelly Lee

01:01:02.880 --> 01:01:05.769
as Miss Muffin, Nate Chambers as Duke Crystal,

01:01:05.929 --> 01:01:08.949
Ryan Tucker as Flea Stick Sock Jelly, and Tristan

01:01:08.949 --> 01:01:12.070
Hayes as the DM. The episode is edited and mixed

01:01:12.070 --> 01:01:14.570
by Tristan Hayes. The artwork for Dummies with

01:01:14.570 --> 01:01:17.170
Dice created by Al Sorensen can be found on Instagram

01:01:17.170 --> 01:01:22.590
under A -R -C -S -I -0. The theme song is The

01:01:22.590 --> 01:01:25.170
Intense Fiddle by Ben Caldera. When it comes

01:01:25.170 --> 01:01:27.050
to Dummies with Dice, you can find our website

01:01:27.050 --> 01:01:30.789
on rss .com slash podcast slash dummieswithdice.

01:01:31.280 --> 01:01:34.219
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