Jehovah's Witness? No, sir. Federal Bureau of
Investigation. Where are my shoes? Right in front
of you, dear. Where they're supposed to be. Everyone
in the order knew Anakin Skywalker. Whether it
happens in a hundred years or a thousand years
or a million years, eventually our sun will grow
cold and go out. Are you alone here? Oh, hardly.
Not all these cats. Hello, mate. Hello, mate.
How you doing? Yeah, we've only been sat here
for nearly an hour. Yeah, I've been rocking backwards
and forwards. But to be fair, while you've been
doing that, I've been cultivating using Suno,
the AI that makes music. And I'm currently cultivating.
Cultivating. I guess that's a word you could
use for it. I'm building a Star Trek heavy metal
album. So, so far we've got We Were Made to Boldly
Go as the opening soundtrack. Then we've got
Queen of the Obvious, followed by The Dirty Doctor
and then The Riker Maneuver. So far, those are
the songs that have come up. Queen of the Obvious
is at the Borg. Queen of the Obvious is a song
about why we all hate the other Troy. You need
a Borg song now. Oh, yes. Borg Queen. It needs
to be like a really heavy. It should be like
an instrumental, shouldn't it? So it's just literally
one. It needs to be repetitive. Zero, one, zero,
one, one, one, zero, zero. Which is binary, yeah.
What's that? German metal band? Oh, Rammstein.
Rammstein, but in binary. Yes, possibly. Eagle
-eared. Eagle -eared. You say eagle eyes. What's
the ear version? What? You know, if you're saying
eagle -eyed viewers, what's the podcast ear version
of eagle -eyed? Send your answers into a postcode
to Karen's address, which is, let me just get
up on my phone. Owl -eared. Owl -eared. Yeah.
Ears of an owl. Yeah. For the owl -eared listener,
there was a, I guess, the intro. Obviously, we
can't do that. It's the way it works. It has
to be next week, so it's going to be next week.
So there's, this is just the opening, then we're
missing a section. We are, yes. Well, unless
you want the Starfleet Academy to be its entire
own section. How long do we want this podcast
to go on for? It's 10 o 'clock. You've been here
for an hour already. No, you know, let's, what
should we discuss? Okay, well, new section, new
section, new section, new section. Enter authorization
code. It's not shit, but it's not great. Yeah,
yeah. I think that's a real good way of putting
it. There were things I did like, absolutely,
surprisingly liked, things I didn't, which I
wasn't surprised I didn't like, if I'm going
to be perfectly honest. Let's just say I really
don't like being spoon -fed things, and that's
exactly what this series is. doing in that very
first episode now i haven't got to episode two
yet spoilers everyone for starfleet academy episode
one and two well i've seen episode two you haven't
i'm looking forward to watching it though that's
the difference so the first one very much spoon
for spoon feeding we're all different blah blah
blah and that's what makes us great we don't
need that spoon fed anymore no we can accept
that that's fine um and you're right there's
bits in it that i really didn't Didn't like the
ship design. I will never be on board with the
whole magnetic floating nacelles. Floating nacelles.
But the fact that it just looks like the Starfleet
logo that they now use is just stupid. So I don't
like the USS Athena. I don't like that it lands
on Earth and becomes the... See, I disagree with
you there. I didn't mind that. I thought it was
a bit of an interesting kind of thing and it
made sense for the nacelles. But I mean, it actually
would have been better. If it still did that,
but it was like a space station that came down
and uncoupled and you saw the vents expressing
gas into the air and things coming off and then
landing and slotting into positions. I don't
see the point to it. You could just build it
on the ground. I'm guessing it's been destroyed,
obviously. It's been many hundreds of years since.
The narratives that we know about with like Deep
Space Nine and whatever and the burns that happened.
Well, they imply, I don't know if it's in the
second episode. I can't remember. They're blowing
into one. The captain, Nala Ake. Nala Ake. Hated
that character. She does say about the school
being able to go off and do practical lessons
by being able to take off and fly off. But I
think you just have a spaceship that does that.
In reality, you'd have a spaceship. Going back
to what I was just saying then, so even though
we're 100 years from now, I would have loved
for us, like, look, you're on Bajor. There's
Deep Space Nine up there. And just have, we've
retrofitted Deep Space Nine because we're trying
to start Starfleet Academy. Yeah, that would
be better. You've got a ship and you've got this
old hung thing that we've got history with Cisco
and you could have an entire bit where she walks
into Cisco's office and there's still the baseball
on the table. Would he still be there in the
wormhole? Oh yes, in the wormy hole. Because
isn't he like an end to godlike entity in the
wormhole? But you could do some really good building
upon that. Yeah. And instead of kind of just
starting... Is the Cisco actor still alive? Oh
yeah. Okay, well then he could come back. yeah
exactly there's just there's things i'm not too
thrilled about at the same time all the things
that people are ranting and raving about oh why
are they wearing glasses it's the 38 but i did
say about that at one point yeah and look look
you know what i'll hold my hands up i saw that
first picture and i i joined in calling it starfleet
beverly hills yeah we both didn't like that and
I shouldn't have. I should have absolutely respected
the creativity and the creators and that this
may not be something made for me, that it was
going to be for someone else. But you know what?
I thoroughly enjoyed it. I take a step back and
I go, I will apologize. I absolutely joined in
on the bandwagon without actually giving it a
chance. And the reason I gave it a chance was
because after that stupid picture, they then
released the... first like three minutes of the
main episode yep which is the brilliant battle
set and it was excellent really well done i want
to just preface a lot of stuff we're talking
about there's a someone i i follow on the socials
and on youtube i saw him originally on tiktok
his name is colin weldon yeah he's an actor and
star trek nerd essentially so go on youtube at
colin weldon actor to watch i linked it on the
sci -fi show socials he's got like a nine video
minute video where he talks about the first two
episodes yes and his opinion it's interesting
because he's like you he seems to just know a
lot about star trek seems to be able to absorb
it where i i couldn't have a conversation with
you two in front of me about star trek particularly
brinley because i wouldn't be able to recollect
a lot of the stuff right but um interesting that
i agreed with a lot of things he said we kind
of came to the same kind of thing but then there's
also he basically had the opposite opinion on
the characters than i did all the characters
i liked he didn't yeah a lot of characters he
liked i didn't which i thought was weird but
considering we actually agreed on everything
else it's interesting like okay so the hologram
girl i find her incredibly annoying yeah i understand
she is meant to be that way so i don't think
that's a fault of the actor the actress actor
well i don't know what they want to be called
nowadays but in any way no no absolutely not
and it probably isn't the fault of any of the
actors or actresses it's always the writing it's
how they've been told to portray the character
and it's a for me my first words to you and then
you watched the episode and came back and you
said you agree was great we've now got an even
more annoying tilly yeah i absolutely agree but
who I also don't like the captain, even remotely.
For me, she's got no redeeming features whatsoever.
I hated her character. Every moment she's on
the screen, I'm like, ugh, this isn't a show
about this captain. No, you know what? I didn't
mind her. Part of me kind of gets where people
are coming from. Again, hundreds and hundreds
of videos on TikTok about why can't she sit in
a chair properly. And yes, the first time you
see her sitting in the chair, it's like... what
on earth are you doing i don't get how you've
actually got into that shape in that chair but
at the same time she's quite small though she
at the same time she's like hundreds of years
old she doesn't really give a shit about this
which is where you get look please come back
and help us sort of thing yeah and realistically
do you think picard sat there for an entire 12
hour shift No, he fucked off to his waiting room,
didn't he? Whoever sat in the con, I'm telling
you now, did not sit bolt upright for the entire
12 hour shift. But there were a few nice touches.
There's a couple of nice touches from her in
episode two. She walks around with nothing on
her feet. I'm like, the way she acts as a captain,
I imagine I would probably be doing the same.
I would be sat on the chair with my feet up.
You know, there's a bit where the computer's
asking for her seating preference and she's going
up and down and up. That was funny. I laughed
at it. I just, she does have moments that are
funny. And I'm like, and yeah, when she's walking
around barefooted and she gets told off by like
a senior member of the... the starflake which
she basically just rubs off going no again i'm
like yeah i like that i can imagine you being
captain or a captain did you know that you've
got your cornflakes down your top oh shit not
again yeah fuck i'd be i'd be eating my cornflakes
there that would be the difference between me
as i'd be i'd be very i'll be a very millennial
boss you'd be like captain sulu with his cup
of tea next to the chair yeah It'll be in my
flask. It'll be like in a van. I have a special
little flask. Anyway, but majority of the time,
I think I didn't like her there at all. Whereas
the character I thought I was going to hate,
I loved. And it was Lurathok, who a lot of people
have not liked. The weird blue, who is also some
kind of Klingon, but not a Klingon. So she is
Jem 'Hadar and Klingon. merged sort of species.
I think she is hilarious. She's hated because,
again, you've got all the Die Hardies out there
and the Die Hard tracks are like, well, the Jem
'Hadar are a genetically created species and
they were all males. How on earth have we suddenly
ended up with a female? They were clones, blah,
blah, blah, blah, blah. Yeah, but she's half
Klingon, so obviously half Klingon's fucking
female then. There you go. And it's a few hundred
years in the future. I'm pretty sure we got past
test tube babies in our era. Therefore, whatever
the fuck is going on in the future, I'm sure
they can merge a couple of people together. Look
at fucking Tuvok and Neelix. They can all just
leave that, surely. She's hilarious. She's both
very funny and a massive arsehole. yeah like
and i really liked that i've got to say the first
time you see her on screen she's shouting at
him making doing the push -ups and i was i was
wearing i'm not sure yeah something doesn't feel
right but then the whole bit where she's like
you are not going to kill me dude just literally
laying into everyone while dying like i quite
like you is i don't know this might be episode
two there's a bit where she's got don't want
to spoil it for you but she's got all of the
students there And she's like, yeah, she's yelling
at them all. And then she like picks on one of
them and yells and yells and yells. And then
that one runs off crying. She's like, I can always
pick the runners. It's just like, she's so funny.
But then there's always, they've managed to put
a fair, not a fair bit of comedy, but just enough
comedy in there as well. Yeah. So things like
when they're all queuing up to see the doctor.
I've swallowed my con badge already. It's like
as if it's a regular thing. Yes, you've already
done it. And he finds all the weird things in
the guy's intestines. It's like, what have you
been doing laying in bogs? No more bogs for you.
Tell me if you had a bowel movement. He's like,
actually don't. And then the whole throwback
to Voyager as well when Kim tries to give him
the... normal tricorder no medical tricorder
they had to do a bit of fan service yeah which
i understand okay essentially the main character
essentially is caleb yes i would say he's the
main antagonist but he i couldn't get past looking
at how fucking jacked he is and how tall he is
compared to everybody he's like um what's wonder
woman what she what race of person is she it's
as a i know what you mean yeah it's like she's
like a male one of those i just like and yeah
i think the annoying thing is and i think unfortunately
a lot of people in this day and age will not
give a tv series more than five minutes and if
in that first five minutes you dislike something
a lot of people will walk away from that and
i don't think i'm unfair in saying that no i
think especially when you've got i would do that
when you've got a franchise such as star trek
i think that's an even stronger chance and i've
got to say the first five minutes of the episode
good god what was the cameraman on literally
i understand you want to do that kind of natural
thing so you you look at the 50s and the 60s
cameras were on a fixed podium yep and then even
through kind of 70s and 80s again fixed podium
then you get to the 90s the early 2000s and you're
kind of getting not shaky cam footage but you're
getting people kind of showing well what we want
is actually to capture it as if the camera's
in on the action so it bounces around a little
bit so you you get that feeling that actually
yeah this is a fluid god damn it the first few
minutes of this thing while the mum's talking
to the son the camera's It's like there's a fucking
earthquake going on. It was ridiculous. If this
is going to be the quality of the filming of
this, I'm really unhappy. Thankfully, that didn't
carry on throughout. But it was really, really
disorientating. Again, I don't want to go back
to Caleb all the time. Not Caleb, sorry. Colin.
Colin Weldon's thing. He was saying he thinks
episode one and two should be swapped around.
I disagree with that. I do think he, you know.
I do think it is really revolving around Caleb.
You need that bit at the beginning. And it sets
up the baddie as well, because he's clearly going
to be coming back. Oh, the baddie's definitely
going to be coming back. I think you could have
got rid of that first couple of minutes where
he's being abandoned by, well, not abandoned
by his mother, but the mother's taken away. I
actually found that really hard to watch. I did.
Yeah, I didn't like that. But you take away that
bit. And you explain it later. You could have
explained it later. You take it away at the beginning.
Then you just have him running, looking for this
person that we don't really know who it is, but
he's looking for them. Then the whole arrest.
Then the begrudging into Starfleet. And then
later on... It could be a secret reveal. He's
revealing to... You nearly caused our ship to
be destroyed. What the fuck were you doing? Then
you expand out on the story then. Well, in episode
two, there's a perfect... position for that to
happen because of his interactions with another
character who we don't see in episode one right
where that would be the perfect time but you
say he could be pouring his heart out to this
person and give that reveal of why he hates um
exactly and that would have been a better intro
because you would have had the action of the
prison freighter yeah that action scene would
have done so much better i concur i agree with
that but um yeah it's it's hard i would say i'm
50 50 on the characters as in i like 50 of them
and i dislike 50 of them and that's not saying
that they may not grow on me I didn't like the
whole jock scene where the jock comes and takes
on the clear. Oh, look, he's got binoculars.
Oh, that's, yeah, that was a standout moment.
And that was the worrying thing about the 90210
thing that we brought up. Yeah, exactly. This
is what we didn't want. That's exactly, you're
right. It's exactly what I didn't want. I just
don't think that would be happening. I've been
to university. That doesn't happen. And I see
Starfleet as a university kind of college thing.
It didn't happen in college either, and I didn't
go to a particularly good college. And we're
hundreds of years in the future when we're meant
to be better humans now. Yeah, and I know they're
all different races and stuff, but I just, yeah,
I just don't think that would be a scenario that's
happening. No. I quite like the fact he's a birdwatcher
by the way, the Klingon. I thought that was quite
sweet. I like the Klingon. Yeah, I ain't got
any issues with the Klingon. I mean, there's,
even after episode two, it's not in it enough
for you to have an issue. I do have a feeling
at some point. He's going to lose his rag. And
we've got this all... My mother taught me to
be calm. That's why we do birdwatching. We do
all of this. And I reckon there's going to be
an anger issue at some point. Is he Falkling
on a half? I don't know. I can't remember what
they said. I'm pretty sure he's... Either way,
I reckon he's going to, there's going to be a
point where he gets pushed too far. Oh, absolutely.
And the old Klingon blood's going to come out
and they're going to hopefully use that. I'd
like you to watch episode two. So before next
time, so we can talk about it again. I mean,
there'll be another episode. Watch two and three.
I'll watch it as well. And we talk about it again.
It's going to be like our new Lower Decks, but
not enjoying it as much. But can I just say,
and feel free to disagree with me, but. as much
as i'm enjoying it and i am going to watch the
rest of it and hopefully it will carry on getting
better and it won't do what sadly a lot of star
trek has done in recent years which is first
few episodes are brilliant and then suddenly
it swan dives and breaks its neck like lara croft
and tomb raider one i'm hoping it doesn't do
that but for me I wish it just didn't follow
the Discovery timeline because for me it's tainted.
You know I dislike Discovery. You know what I
feel about Discovery too. And I genuinely would
have loved, and I know this is because my Star
Trek was the next generation, but I would have
loved maybe Starfleet Academy. Picard at the
Academy, his early years, almost like a young...
young indiana jones young picard i know we just
got a series about picard but okay voyager comes
home seven of nine oh well done you've got through
all of that now she's got to go through the academy
but i mean where is star trek going is like how
many seasons if there'll be two three i would
imagine this will get two seasons and it'll be
cancelled okay because okay let's well because
it's probably not gonna be that popular exactly
so let's say two for this we know there's going
to be five of strange new worlds yeah we're on
four so that means the last season of strange
new worlds will be at the same time probably
ish as the second season of this yeah lower decks
is finished i saw rumors of them talking to the
janeway actors about a janeway version like picard
yeah but the one that she's in isn't on anymore
Kate Mulgrew, yeah. So Prodigy is gone. Prodigy
stopped. There's a cameo, by the way, in episode
two. I thought there might be. Not with her.
With someone else. Yeah, Rock. Oh, you've seen
it. I've seen pictures everywhere. What's next?
Because that was the other thing. What are Paramount
going to do next? Because then they've finished
everything. Yeah. There's nothing happening.
And this is what I was going to say. What they
could have done, Starfleet Academy, Pike, Kirk,
right in the middle. see kirk's journey through
the academy while strange new worlds is going
on and then have him join the enterprise and
then you can head off into the original series
style of things there's just there's a lot i
would have liked to have seen okay i don't mind
them going in a different direction i understand
that i understand that you can't keep hovering
around unfortunately what people still call real
star trek if you want to encourage new people
to it. And that is what this is about. You've
got to encourage new people to it. But if you're
going to encourage people to it, you've got to
do a fucking good job about actually making the
show. You've got to attract the original people
to start with as well. And you've got to stop
canning everything after one or two seasons.
I think Paramount is learning what Disney has
learned. of star wars disney are correcting their
mistakes with star wars now and i think that
that paramount are just a few years behind that
curve of being like oh we've already put money
into all this other stuff we're going to have
to at least follow it through try and get some
of that back and then they need to bring in their
own star trek genius you know like star wars
have done can't remember his name um who they've
got in charge of Lucasfilm now. They've got a
new bloke in charge who knows everything about
Star Wars. They need to do the same thing for
Star Trek. It's going to go two ways, I think.
I've said before, I would love to have a reimagining
of the original series with the new actors. Yes.
I would love that. as just its own thing. Just
pretend that all the other original series didn't
happen. It doesn't have to be, you don't have
to try and paint it with multiverse and all this
other bullshit. Just let it just be. But you
could have done this as a crossover between Strange
New Olds and TOS and have something in the middle.
Yeah. Yeah. And that's it. Or... They are supposed
to be doing more films. They're supposed to be
starting the films again, aren't they? Yeah.
I wonder if that's what's going to happen. They're
going to finish off these series, the films will
come out, and that will be the reboot. Yeah,
but if Section 31 is any way to go by films,
then we are in for massive, massive problems.
Well, let's just fucking hope that that's just
a blip. Let's just hope that they actually go,
actually, you know what? Seven of Nine is a captain
of a ship. That would be great. Seeing as we
saw at the end of Picard 3. Yeah. Yeah, you know
what? I would love that series. Most people would.
Yeah. Are they going to do it? Probably not.
No. No. Right. Okay. That will forever not be
on the recording. Absolutely not. That definitely
cannot be on the recording. Right. Okay. So what
have you been up to? Other than Starfleet. What
have you been up to? Well, a little bit more
Starfleet because I re -watched Star Trek, the
2009 film, the Chris Pine one. Nice. I forgot
how much I enjoyed it. You were re -watching.
You were going through them, weren't you? Yeah.
I just forgot how much I enjoyed it. I re -watched
it today. Really good film. Really fun. Is this
the second one? That's the first one where Chris
Pine is beaten up at the beginning and decides
to join Starfleet and it's the Romulans who've
come to kill Spock and we get old Spock and all
that. I think it's a good film. It's the third
one. Can't stand the lens flare in it. JJ Abrams
loves it. I know and it's just ridiculous. It's
so ridiculous. Yeah, he does it in that. The
first of the remakes of the Star Wars, the redoes
of the Star Wars, isn't he? It's just so stupid.
Anyway, watch that. Really enjoyed it. Short
Circuit 2 I bought on streaming. That's been
a long time since I've seen that. I love Short
Circuit 1. I love Short Circuit 2. And you never
see anyone put Short Circuit 2 on anywhere. Short
Circuit 1 gets rerun. The second one never does.
And it's so good. And I've got notes here. Racist
in under two minutes. Well, that actor was white,
though, wasn't he? Yeah, Fisher Stevens was actually
white, which doesn't help. And then you've got
the character that's playing Fred, and I can't
think of his name, famous actor, within two minutes
says, did they not teach you that when you got
off the banana boat? Oh, that's bad. Is this
80s? Yeah. What, 83? No. Three or seven. They're
the two numbers I'm putting in, three or seven.
Let's have a look. Short. Oh, no, that's Shirt
Circuit. The Shirt Circuit, that's the Pornhub
version. Short Circuit to 88. And Michael McKean
was the actor I was thinking about. But yeah,
it's just such a glorious film. I love it to
bits. The entire end bit, when you get a holding
out for a hero by Bonnie Tyler kick in, him ending
up gold as the final thing. It's a wonderful
film. Okay, now you're saying it. I remember
you saying it. Come on, number five. And shocking
him with the defib. It's like, yes, come on.
I tell you what, they don't make films like they
used to, do they? Oh my God, no. Horrendously
racist and terrible. No. It's still one of my
favorites. I love it. Yeah, it's a great film.
I know you're saying I'm remembering it. And
then hopefully next week, if we get some time,
that is, I saw 28 Years Later, The Bone Temple,
and I want to go and see it again. Yeah, it's
not worked out for me this week. No, it's not
worked out for any of us. Next week, I should
have time to do this. But even if it's just to
see one particular scene in it. Tamsin's massive
cock. Oh yeah, no, no, that's plenty in it. That
is plenty in it. Can you tell me, actually, This
isn't spoilers. Are they still naked or have
they covered them up? He covers up for a moment,
but there's a reason why you still see a huge
amount of his cock. But what about the other
zombles? Oh, they're all naked. Okay, good. So
who was it who said to what was it? James said
it was you that said that there was outcry. So
they're covering. Someone was talking about that.
They were going to start covering them up. I'm
glad that hasn't happened. And it does happen
in a moment of it. But there's a reason behind
it. That makes sense. And the one scene I want
you to see in it that I just care about is the
Ralph Fiennes scene. And James, who's listening,
knows exactly that scene. And it's just fucking
amazing. Ralph Fiennes just blows all acting
ever out of the ocean. Does Samson come towards
him and he goes, I've got this so, so much that
I can't say without spoiling it. Let's try next
week. Let's try and explain. As I was genuinely
worried, are we going to end up going down this
whole George A. Romero thing? That was my concern.
And I'm not going to lie, there is a little bit
there. But this makes way more sense. Okay. So
I'm now really interested to see how they end
this trilogy. Because it's a little bit like
that in the film that shall not be named by the
man who shall not be named. I am legend. Yeah.
the i call them the light avoiders but the dark
seekers they've got a rage virus but they are
still kind of hierarchical and you know that's
still in there kind of more like um more animal
instinct and that's how i would like it to go
with 28 years later bone temple and that that
that makes sense i think i think not the romero
version where we're pumping gas that's fucking
dumb knowing how much you enjoyed The first film.
Absolutely. And by first film, I mean 28 years
later, not 28 days later. Surprised how much
I liked it. You are going to love this. Good.
Seriously, you are going to really love it. Were
you alone in this as well? I was. That's hilarious.
And it was like their third biggest screen as
well. It was screen number three. I really wish
that you'd been like Punk'd and it was on purpose.
Sorry for all the children that don't know what
Punk'd is. It is a television show that used
to be on MTV. Late 90s, early noughties. Ashton
Kutcher. Ashton Kutcher. Yeah, there you go.
Where they used to play tricks on people. Those
are all the films I've watched. We started well,
I'm saying that. We started watching The Hunger
Games with Kay. uh she's i don't want to watch
i don't want to watch it so jim randomly just
put the film on so me and tom are going to watch
it then and then she slowly watched that then
we got questions and then oh you are watching
it are you yes shut up they're good films i like
them i like all of them and i like the new ones
they're doing too ah well you might be a bit
jealous of this then oh yeah we like the new
ones and the new one in november can't come soon
enough yeah um i am taking jem in june for her
birthday to the stage version oh i do and it's
one of these stages that you sit all around the
stage oh wow cool is this in london yeah where
is it in london um right next to canary wolf
i can't think of the name of the theater but
i think that but it's it looks amazing wow that
would be wicked i did love those and it's try
not to be the book has she read the books she
seems like she's read the books jem has read
the book because they're not the same no no the
books are way more brutal yeah but they they
kept it to a 12 but they they did they have done
a good job they have done a really good job and
you don't after i mean obviously i listened to
them listening to them and then going watching
them at no point was i ever like uh uh you know
they're ruining it i missed the cat piss never
clean i missed that but i think that was probably
it because we've said it loads of times the things
that work in books don't always work in tv shows
and no they just don't you just can't do it because
and also with books But your imagination has
a lot involved. And the way I perceive a book
is going to be different than you perceive a
book. How you build a character, how that character
sounds, how they look. Exactly. It's never going
to be quite the same with everybody. No. Okay.
A prime example, Pierce Brown, who writes the
Red Rising books, my favourite books of all time.
He did an interview recently and he named an
actor who he, or a character for something else
that he had based Severa on. way, way away from
what I'd ever imagined Severo was in my head
to the point that I kind of instantly, purposely
forgot what he said. Because I was like, that
is not how I see Severo, even remotely. Yeah,
fair enough. I'm going to look it up. I'm going
to have to tell Karen because she loves those
books too. Anyway, anything else? Yeah, the other
films was... The other child who said, I don't
want to watch this, Daddy. I don't like these
sorts of films. Yeah, the other child. Yeah,
the Etsy. I went, we're going to watch Toy Story,
my all -time favorite film. And glued. Probably
followed by Toy Story 2. We're watching that
now, Daddy. Okay, we'll watch Toy Story 2. I
went for a bath, came down. Toy Story 3 was there.
Yeah. He's now got a Buzz Lightyear as well.
Oh, did you? You've got an Amazon or do you get
them from Facebook Marketplace? Amazon. Yeah,
so you've got the one that talks and everything.
It will talk to another... That's the one that
I got tea for Christmas to replace the one I
got on the Marketplace that eventually died.
I would say the one thing I don't like about
it, I find the arm with the judo chop action
constantly is just pinging up on its own. And
I'd quite like that to either have an option
where you could just like twist the judo chop
button and it just... disengages the arm and
makes it poseable again. It's a little bit annoying,
but the one thing that is bad about it is they
have, unless mine's faulty, mine, T's, is faulty,
the speaker for his arm laser is rubbish. Because
the other one I have, I have, we have, sounds
exactly like the film, whereas T's new one...
Does not. And to the point where he even said,
it doesn't sound right, Daddy. I'll send you
a video of mine and I'll let you think. I can't
think what it sounds like. I'll play both of
ours. Ours was live. Loud, sorry, not live. Ours
was loud. And he was giggling away at pressing
it. So he was happy. But I can't, yeah, I'll
have to double check. Might he got most fun at
the fact the other arm could open up. Oh, yeah.
Yeah, you can open up to get to the buttons.
yeah inside on this one thing i'm not sure on
why they did this why his wings fold differently
to how they do in the the film i think because
so in the film and the original toy they used
to just push in yeah but it falls apart constantly
i'm forever fixing it i think it's just a they've
just done it because obviously the people who've
made the animated thing didn't think about how
it would work as a toy whereas actually we have
it as a toy the wings get stuck and they fall
off and there's like string and stuff in there
kind of helping it go and whilst the action is
really nice and fun it's very easy for one of
them to kind of come off its cogs and just flop
around and i'm constantly repairing it whereas
the new one it's built better yeah but they have
cheaped out on the microphone the leds are really
bright on it as well yeah they're neat because
the again the original one doesn't have the leds
on the wings and stuff which he does in the film
which is quite surprising when they didn't put
it in but the only reason we actually did get
the new ones because the light on the laser arm
failed oh yeah and that was the start and i kept
repaying all the time and he was really gutted
by that light and i was like i got a bit more
money it is a big part of the film it's a big
part of the character I'm so glad he's into it,
though. He's loving it. And the first film is
in my top ten films of all time, if not my favourite,
just because it's just so lovely and it's so
clever and there's so much about it that I could
not ever be unhappy with. It's just so good.
So, so good. And no doubt it will be remastered
at some time by Disney. yeah well they're making
another one i imagine remasters will come after
which i don't want because part of the charm
of it is that it looks old and that's how i remember
it and how it grows seeing the first one but
done in the style of toy story 4 would remove
some of the magic behind it i like watching them
one by one and seeing the improvements in technologies
you go along yeah That's what's great about when
you watch Monsters, Inc. and you see the hair,
when you're first bringing the hair and stuff
in. A few hundred hairs versus a million hairs
per centimetre square. It was always... I remember
when I used to do it and you're using this hairbrush
tool and you watch your computer die as you're
painting grass on the ground. Yeah, and I remember
watching Toy Story 4 and the bit where they go
into the antique shop, looking at the floor and
going, surely that's just a picture of a floor
they've digitised because it just... Beyond real.
Yeah, they've done some really good stuff. Yeah.
Toy Story's brilliant. Yeah. TV -wise, I started
watching Cheers. Yeah, you said. Which is on
Paramount from the very first episode. And you
know what? It's really fun. yeah it's just really
old -fashioned comedy uh 82 ted danson if people
didn't know um i thought it was older than 82
if i'm honest but it's just yeah it's it's fun
it's got a charm about it and i found myself
laughing quite a lot to it and that ties into
toy story obviously because you've got uh john
ratzenberg is one of the characters in it who
did ham and every other voice under the sun yeah
he's in all of them though isn't he i think he's
in No, he's dead now, isn't he? Well, he was
in all of the... He did a cameo in basically
all of them. Oh, no, he's not dead. I thought
he was. No, let's not wish his life away. Oh,
yeah, no. But I think, again, Pixar doing what
Pixar do, I think it's either Cars or it's A
Bug's Life. It's one of them where it's literally
just his voice over and over again. It's like,
hey. they're just reusing the same guy and it's
just the after credits thing and it's just wonderful
because yeah they do it must be a car's life
because it's like it must be cars sorry because
they do a bug's life but it's all cars and he
either way i can't remember where it is now it's
in the after credits it's the after credits after
credits of cars where he plays mac doesn't he
plays the big uh yeah it might be the after credits
of the The second car or third car. It's one
of them because I know that they do the spoof
because it's a bug's life and it's a car's life.
And all the bugs are like little cars. Well,
no, they have the bug cars in the first one.
Actually, just in it. So the bugs that are flying
around in the desert are little car bugs. But
there's an after credit scene where they go to
watch a drive -thru. Yes. Film thing. And then,
yeah, it's showing loads of things. And there's
car stories, so you've got like... Yeah, I think
it's Cars 2, I think. Yeah. That's what I want
to say, Cars 2. Possibly. Anyway, that's it.
Yeah. Well, on to the next one. Your turn. Right.
What have you been up to? What have I been up
to? TV -wise, we're up to date on that thing
on Disney with the Greek stuff. Oh, Percy Jackson.
Percy Jackson, yeah. It hasn't got any better
or worse. I've got no good things or bad things
to say about it. I won't be worried when it's
finished. Other than that... Did I hear Fallout
Series 2 has started? Yes, we're watching Fallout
Series 2. That is brilliant. I think that's a
really, really good adaption. And, yeah, I mean,
it's got Todd Howard involved in it, who, he
didn't invent Fallout. Someone else invented
it. But, you know, he's the guy responsible for
the... From two onwards. But isn't it funny how,
again, we were saying it with stuff at the Academy,
that an article or Die Hard fans can make or
break a show. Because the article I saw earlier
was series two of Fallout Out loses 72 % of audience.
Why? i don't know i didn't read it because i
couldn't be asked yeah fuck off it's just as
good as the series before and it's on vegas which
is like everyone loves fallout new vegas more
than because fallout new vegas is like the uh
add -on slash sequel to fallout three and everyone
loves that more than the other one and it was
made by another company yes they outsourced it
everyone loves new vegas and this is based on
that You know, come on, guys. I mean, I'm watching
it. I think it's brilliant. Just fucking get
over it. But, you know, I'm one of the guys that
likes the Lord of the Rings series. But I think
because I'm such a Lord of the Rings fanboy anyway,
you know, I'm still going to like it anyway.
Anyway, enough of that. Lord of the Rings Season
2, we're behind by an episode now. I think another
one's come out. But, yeah, that's really, really
good in my opinion. But TV -wise, that's it.
I've been playing a lot of games. Ooh. Well,
two in particular. One that you definitely know
about. You do any. Tainted Grail, Fall of Avalon.
That fucking sucks. He's been playing with his
taint, ladies and gents. He's so addicted to
it. The addiction has been slightly... I can't
remember the word I'm looking for. You've OD'd
on it. Yeah, it's gone down a bit because a different
game has come in to help fill the void of that.
So because of the Steam Deck, I'm playing Tainted
Grail on the Steam Deck a lot. Yeah. Because
Miranda's been doing a lot on the computer for
her courses. and recess or revision um so that's
fine so when she's on that i can use that and
play that and it's basically imagine elder scrolls
but you've played elder scrolls yep yep so like
that but really dark all your interactions are
about death there's been one about um a woman
you can help a woman decide whether She's going
to kill her husband or have him commit suicide.
He gets fucked up by a demon, basically. Right.
And he becomes basically a vegetable. It's really
dark stuff. But it's all about a reality where
King Arthur and Merlin, they're all there, the
Knights of the Round Table, and where they live
gets infested by this thing called the Red Death.
which is basically the plague, but it's like
a magic plague. Right. And it really fucking
kills you. Okay. Incredibly contagious, kills
you. And they escape to it by travelling to this
place called Avalon and create a new utopian
Avalon. But something happens where the Red Death
makes its way there too. And there's implications
that actually King Arthur is a bad guy, but you
don't know. So you start off by being a person
who's infected with this disease and you're being
tortured by a load of monks in a prison island.
Basically, you're an Alcatraz being tortured
and tested on by the monks. Right. So obviously
you escape. Someone helps you out. Very Oblivion
-esque. You get helped out. You escape. You...
This is literally the intro for a game that came
out eight months ago, everyone, so sorry about
spoilers. You end up falling into this area where
you help this entity escape its prison. You don't
really know what it is. It doesn't know what
it is either, or at least it tells you it doesn't.
But it turns out that's the soul of King Arthur,
who you then bring to life again. But then he
kind of, the strength of whatever he gets put
into dissipates and then he's kind of, but you've
kind of got a part of him inside you. Yeah, his
soul inside you. So you can kind of commune with
him. And the idea is you're working with this
other person who wants to find all of the horcruxes
essentially for King Arthur and destroy them
so that the monks can stop trying to bring him
back from the dead, which is what they're trying
to do. for whatever reason because he's saying
king arthur's evil king arthur has got claims
he has got no memory of why this person says
he's evil he doesn't know and the way he acts
when you talk to him he acts very much how you
think of very kingly and very yeah and he's trying
to get you to go because when because what happens
the guy kills you the guy who's trying to kill
king arthur kills you and brings you back to
life going look I've killed that shard of King
Arthur inside you. I knew I'd be able to bring
you back. He thinks that shard of King Arthur
inside you is dead. It's not. Okay. So now King
Arthur's like, let's keep letting him think I'm
dead. Go and do the things he's asking you to
do. But when we take the power, we'll just keep
tricking him every time. Right. Okay. Yeah. So
that's where, that's where I was going, but it's
really dark and I love dark grid, horrible, like.
dystopian kind of environments, particularly
medieval ones. I love all that stuff. And the
final boss of the game is you having to put your
shard of Arthur back in Arthur. Yeah, you have
to get your shard into Arthur. So yeah, I've
been playing that a lot. I've got hours into
it. And it runs really well on the Steam Deck.
Graphically, not good on the Steam Deck, but
frame rate is absolutely great. And yeah, going
between that and the computer, it's really nice.
Oh, awesome. And then a game called Hytale came
out. which is basically Minecraft. So Hytale
was... Yeah, that's what it looked like. It was
like Minecraft plus plus. Okay, so there's a
story behind it. The people who made Hytale made
a mod for Minecraft, I'm going to say, six or
seven years ago, right? And then they decided
to make their own game. And they were doing it
for a few years. And then they were bought by
Riot. And then Riot... put it through development
hell for like six years. Sounds about right.
And then a company brought Riot and binned a
load of their games. Hytale was one of them.
Riot sold the rights of the game back to the
original creator because all the original people
left because they got pushed out. So the original
creator came back with loads of the original
staff who were all just modders from Minecraft.
25 million, he brought it back. Nice. Two months
later, released it. so they rolled it the six
years back so now it's in the state it was before
riot were involved so it was ready to be released
in this state six years ago right okay and now
it's after he pays 25 million gets it back um
two months later get it stable just release it
to the world for um i think it's 20 or something
yeah in a kind of just minecraft did this when
minecraft come out i paid 10 pound for minecraft
minecraft i play i only paid 10 pound for because
i bought the alpha of it it there was nothing
in that game no really it was just creative essentially
creative mode fog of war yeah blocks and very
little else you can do in it and it's incredible
to think that you know we've been playing that
game for so long i paid barely anything for it
and they did just allow you to just keep going
to the new version you know i have since like
brought the switch version and other versions
of it other consoles but my pc version is that
original 10 pound version of it that they just
upgraded anyway side note it's essentially essentially
it's minecraft but with bells and whistles everywhere
people call it minecraft 2 and i think that's
a really good analogy for actually what it is
uh i like minecraft 2 the screenshots i saw there
was furniture Yeah, I mean, if there's time,
I'll show you. I've been working on a house the
last two days. Right, okay. I only actually downloaded
it because I watched a video of it and T watched
the trailer with me and he was like, oh, I'd
really like to play this. So, okay, I'll download
it and then I'll make it. So, I've set my solo
server up that if you die, you don't lose anything.
Nice. You keep all your stuff. Yeah. You don't
lose any damage to any of your health, nothing.
You just have it all still. Okay. Because, you
know, he's five. it's just like so if i so i've
been building in this really nice house and he's
got a decent sword and stuff and now he can actually
go and fight things but yeah it's really good
and it is really addictive it's instantly brought
back that bit inside my brain that minecraft
always got yeah and there is actually considering
it's only been out for a few days like a week
there's a lot in there and there are people online
going oh yeah i've been playing it for 15 hours
i've seen everything you could possibly see how
you haven't been playing the game you've just
gone look at this area look at this area look
at this area look at this area dig down oh i've
managed to get one of every single yeah i'm done
that's not it these kind of games are i when
i had um a server going i had like mark i don't
remember if you were going you invited me towards
the end of it and we saw i saw the giant hole
you just dug with the rail network yeah so we
had Didn't Mark make a football stadium as well?
We had Old Trafford. Yeah, that was it. So we
built Old Trafford. So we built a quarry, which
was like, I think it was 50 by 50 blocks square,
all the way down to Bedrock. Yeah. And then they
brought a new, I think then they brought out
the version, maybe it was called Bedrock. They
brought a version out of it that had new things.
But the only way you could get it is you had
to go to chunks that had never loaded before
in your server. Oh. So we basically. built a
tunnel and a straight line to an area who'd never
been before from bedrock yeah and all it takes
i think because then we put a minecraft in it
it takes literally like two whole minutes of
sitting in a minecart yeah i remember going a
lot i remember on redstone you pop up again at
the other end and you've built the um water lift
yeah we had a water lift to get in and out yeah
yeah so that was always quite handy yeah we did
loads of stuff and we had these really big houses
and all kinds of things so i can yeah we were
really into that i always played minecraft for
the creativity i never played it to get to the
end to beat the ender dragon all of that crap
couldn't give a stuff i enjoyed building a place
having a couple of fights a bit of mining fishing
that's what i enjoyed so if this game's got that
but it looks prettier and it's done better, I'll
be well up for that. I think if we have time,
have a quick look at it, I think you'll instantly
be like, yeah, I like this. And it's particularly
like, you know when they added the caverns and
stuff to Minecraft? Yes. That's in there already,
in this. And when you go down into the mines,
the mines, there's like, you know in Lord of
the Rings when Frodo gets wrapped up? Yeah. By
the spider silk. They've got like things like
that under there. Like I fell into a cave and
it was a room filled with like eight of these
mummified characters, you know, wiggling around
and like, oh shit. And eventually a giant spider
did attack me. Oh, that's amazing. Yeah. And
then like massive maze caverns and loads of like
loads of different enemies. Excuse me. Loads
of like little lava dungeons and stuff. they
have got loads of dungeons scattered everywhere
with little signposts that say coming soon nice
which is quite cute to know that this thing isn't
just random it's going to be something eventually
oh so there is no is it seeded generation or
is it just the same map no it's see yeah no it's
random oh okay cool it's random but i think that's
the one thing i would say with minecraft even
in creative well not in creative mode but if
you're ever trying to be creative without creative
mode i often found that If I was going to sit
down for maybe a two -hour gaming session, the
first hour would be trying to find three fucking
sheep so I could make a bed. Yeah. Which often
proved near on impossible in the first hour.
Or traversing the landscape until I found somewhere
that had got a decent coal supply. And that got
on my nerves. So you make torches in this by
using tree sap. Right. So you get sap from cutting
down trees. So you cut the bottom of a tree,
the whole tree falls down. Yeah. There's nice
little touches like that. You're not shearing
sheep to make a bed. I think you make it out
of plant fibre. Yeah. They've definitely... They've
obviously got to make it legally distinct to
Minecraft. You make a lot of the crafting stuff
using particular style benches, which can draw
straight from chests. Fine. Which is a mod in
Minecraft, which I used. Okay. I have, so modding
in it is really easy. I've done loads of mods.
You literally, they've designed it specifically
to be modded because they're modders themselves.
Awesome. So you download another program called
something forge and it's basically a storefront.
Yeah. You find the game that you're playing,
you download, it automatically saves it in the
correct location. Nice. You go into the game,
you right click your world and you tick the boxes
for the ones that you want. It literally has
them listed and you just tick the boxes for the
mods you want to use. You can put them in, take
them out. You can have multiple worlds. Each
world can use different mods. You know? Yeah.
Yeah, there's loads. If you like Minecraft, you
will like Hytale. Definitely will like it. T
thinks it's great. Yeah, and as I said, you can
make it so you don't lose durability, you don't
lose experience, you don't lose your items. And
whilst I wouldn't play like that myself, because
then there's no... You're not worried about dying
at that point. Yeah, fair enough. Because what
I always liked about Minecraft was, you've done
this, you've got to get out of this fucking cave.
I've got ten diamonds, I've got to get out of
this bloody cave now. Well, I don't have that
worry at the moment, which I can turn on and
off as I please. So you can just back out the
game, right click on the world map again, and
then change that setting. So really I could,
so basically when I finish building the house,
which is nearly done, I'm going to turn that
off. And whenever I'm playing, I'm going to have
it off. And then when I know he's going to play
it, I'll just right click it, make it so nothing
can get lost. Off we go. It'd be nice if it was
on consoles. Jeopardy was the word I'm looking
for. Jeopardy, yep. I know it's not on consoles
at the moment. No, there's no controller support
either, which is another downside. They've said
they're working on it as soon as possible, which
is why even though I could get it running on
the Steam Deck, you couldn't use it. Some people
have managed to get it going. I was going to
say that would be nice for my one because my
one has the ability to map. all the controls
to keyboard instead. Some other people have managed
it, but I'm not going to sit there and do that.
I'll just use it on the computer. Yeah, fair
enough. It is multiplayer. I have set my personal
world set solo, but there is a way you can get
around that and make it multiplayer. Or you can
just make yourself multiplayer one off you go.
I don't think you need to do like Minecraft to
have servers and stuff. You just off you go,
multiplayer. I might give that a go. Yeah, that's
it. Sorry, lost the game. I've spoke 60 minutes
about two games essentially. God, let's talk
about virus. Yep. Accessing library computer
data. So virus, 1999, $75 million budget. Let's
actually do a little bit of work for this before
we actually talk about it, shall we? We never
do. We always get straight into it. um so virus
i'm going to read you what imdb put down as the
plot so after outrunning a typhoon at sea a strong
-willed tugboat navigator and her crew discover
a high -tech alien life form that's taken control
of a russian research vessel and aims to destroy
on a massive scale now the film stars jamie lee
curtis uh you'll know from true lies from halloween
all sorts of films donald sutherland we've already
talked about films for that tonight, Hunger Games,
but I've been in so much. William Baldwin. He's
a Baldwin. He's one of the Baldwins. Probably
the least known that I would think of. Yeah.
I don't like him particularly much. No, fair
enough. But the one that most people, other than
Donald Sutherland and Jamie Lee Curtis, if you
look at the rest of the crew, the one that I
think most people will then recognise is the
one that plays... Hiko, which is an actor called
Cliff Curtis, who was Searle in Sunshine. He
was... Let me bring up R &B. Sorry. He's a phenomenal
actor. He's been in all sorts, to be fair. He's
the sort of person, Cliff Curtis, he's the sort
of person that you'll look at and you'll go,
oh, him. He was in a TV series called Trauma.
Terrible, terrible, terrible TV series, by the
way. What else? Traffic, Training Day, Blow.
Which his name was? Cliff Curtis. Oh, yeah, him.
Three Kings. Yeah, him. He's been in so much.
He's in bloody everything, yeah. When you see
him, he's very young in this. Yeah, Maori native.
He was uncredited in Mars Attacks, allegedly.
Okay. People will definitely know him from Meg
and Meg 2. Yeah, Meg and the Meg 2, yeah. New
Zealand character. Really, really, really, really
good actor, actually, for what he is. Now, as
I said, $75 million in the budget. Do you want
to take a guess at what it grossed worldwide?
I don't think it got that. I don't think it made
its money. $30 million, sadly. Yeah, that's a
shame, really. Came in at $1 .39. It's quite
a hard one to get hold of. They haven't, or they
have done remasters, but I don't think they're
available to buy anymore. The YouTube one I watched
wasn't remastered. It was quite bad quality.
It was bad quality with German dubbing. Yeah.
So I have no idea what the Russians said at the
beginning. Not a clue. Not a clue. It's a whole
thing on the Russian space station. I don't know
what they said. It's back in stock at £8 .19
on the Blu -ray edition. Oh, okay. Fair enough.
Yes, we had to watch the Dodger YouTube version.
When we get our server running, I'll buy it and
rip it. Go on. I'm really intrigued to hear just
a couple of words. What did you think of the
film? Did I like it? I don't know if I liked
it or not. I kind of... What I did like, the
practical effects were fantastic. The robots
were brilliant. So the Goliath robot at the end.
other than the CGI one that you see quite a lot
of, was made as a practical effect. Nine foot
tall, four tons in weight. Really? And they managed
to make it in three and a half months based on
the drawings they got given. Yeah, they did a
really good job. There's a scene where all the
robots are like in a building room. The first
time you really kind of see them. Oh, when they're
all little bugs and things. Yeah, that's great.
All of the robotics, all of the... the cyborgs
particularly the first cyborg you get the um
it's it's horrendous yeah it was gross it was
like a mix between robocop and terminator that
thing was yeah it's a weird amalgamation a lot
of people kind of linking it to the thing as
well funnily enough well that's i was gonna say
it was a A cyborg version of the thing, where
the thing was flesh and gross and wet. This was
metal and hard and spiky. And I love the fact
that they've got that on the bridge. And then
he just rips open, very thingish, and out comes
kind of the spinal cord with the skull on top.
Yeah, I got a note of that, yeah. I thought that
was brilliant. The little mini -me comes out
of him, yeah. It was absolutely brilliant. I
was just, wow. And it looked really good. It
looked great. I mean, it didn't make me jump
at any point in time. No. I wasn't even remotely
kind of worried about any character. I wasn't
attached to any character. All the... the whole
kind of yeah i wasn't really kind of invested
in anyone's plot at any point in time this was
just a bunch of people on the ship who were dickheads
and um deserved a lot of what they got and uh
it's a shame they didn't all die yeah so let's
rewind it a little bit so i've read the very
very brief bit that um imdb give you what happens
in the film mere space station Gets hit by some
sort of electrical storm. What did I call it?
I called it something on my notes. Oh, God. Blue
space wave. Blue space wave. Hits Mir. That transmits
something down to the ship. Ship starts exploding.
We then end up on the tug with Donald Sutherland,
who's a dick. He's a complete prick, yeah. He's
saying that he's invested everything he owned
into rescuing this cargo. Yeah, but doesn't want
to spend any money on insurance. No. It then
all goes wrong. Sinks. Oh, no. Then they find
the Russian ship. It's all dead. Someone seems
to be alive on it. They don't know what's happened
there. And then things vastly go wrong. That
is the premise of the film. Now, honestly, Donald
Sutherland, Jamie Lee Curtis, brilliant. The
other actors, they could have done with a few
more better names in it. Writing could have been
a lot better. Premise of the film, though, and
the effects, really, really very good. Yeah,
I wasn't disappointed by any of the effects.
Even the CGI giant Goliath, I didn't think it
looked rubbish. It looked as it probably would
for the time. I've got here what this film could
have been with the right writers and actors.
Yeah. As I feel that if you'd got the right writers
in there who could have padded out the story
properly without this weird varying speed of
story. and actually had a little bit, for once,
a bit more exposition on certain things, I think
it would have been brilliant because I found
the acting is very underwhelming in it. Yeah.
Yeah, it is underwhelming. But yeah, the effects
were brilliant. One of the bits I really love
is when Donald Southern walks in to go and see
the mainframe, the server running, and he looks
at the Russian's body that's being cut up that's
got the star on the chest. He's like, oh. All
of that without a head. Wow. Blah, blah, blah.
And then when Donald Sutherland's cyborg body
turns up, it's that chest. Yeah. So it's like
the computer's listening. It's like, well, just
take your head and stick it on that then. Brilliant.
Yeah. Did he know that was going to happen to
him? I presume so. Well, if you read, interesting,
if you read the notes, it said Donald Sutherland
insisted that all his cyborg scenes were filmed
in one day. There's only one cyborg scene. No,
I mean, not the actor. I mean, the character.
Did he go in there thinking that? No, I think
he thought he was just going to be able to deal
with this, just like he deals with everyone.
So I had a moment in it where I was like, why
would he be doing that when the computer monster
is typing on a keyboard? Oh, right, yes. I was
like, why would he be doing that? Isn't it the
computer? Why does it need someone to physically
input on the keyboard? I just thought that was
a bit funny. Yeah. You know, just that moment.
No, fair enough. I mean, ultimately, there isn't
much to say about it. It's a very clearly 2000s
horror. So it spawned from the idea that was
turned into four comic books. So from what I
understand about Virus, it was turned down. several
times and eventually they turned it into four
separate comic books the story and they did amazingly
the comic books absolutely flew off the shelves
so the idea is good so that then got people listening
and they made the film jamie lee curtis says
it's one of her worst films if not the worst
film she ever made i don't know freaky friday
and freakier friday ladies and gents i guarantee
you she doesn't say it anymore yeah um but yeah
I don't think it's terrible. I enjoy it. It's
very cheesy. The ending with the missiles is
very funny. I think it's very funny that if you
look into the history of it, the boat was meant
to be used for the Abyss. It didn't get used
or part of it got used. So it was then just left
out and rusted. So they literally cleaned one
side of the boat and you only ever see one side
of the boat. I never noticed that. Because the
other side is completely just knackered. Oh,
I never noticed. So no, that was all in people's
notes, which I thought was fun. And remarkably,
so we set about watching it. And I think I said
it was the 15th of January. Was it 26 years ago
to that day it was released? It's like, how funny.
Literally, we'd chosen this film. So that had
come around. But then I started reading all the
kind of comments. And then like anything on social
media, you then start seeing more posts about
exactly the same shit. And you know what? I really,
really didn't think about this until watching
it. This is Moontrap 2. Shit, I guess it is.
You're right. It would have been a perfect continuation.
Absolutely. You had the pod crash down to Earth.
Ignore the blue wave. Ignore the blue wave. You've
got the pod crash down, rather than it landing
in the car. Land in the ocean. Landed in the
ocean. They find it. Gets picked up by NASA,
who, right, well, we saw something crash into
the ocean. We've gone to go and find out what
it was. Pick it up, takes over. It could have
been perfect because everything, so many of the
robots. So when she's chained up and it's got
the brain scan and it's about to start cutting
the top of her head off and whatever, that's
straight out of Moontrap. So much of it was out
of Moontrap already. Yeah, you're absolutely
right. But done with far better effects because
it was a newer film with more budget. Yeah, well,
it never crossed my mind at the time, but absolutely.
Did someone else say that as well? Lots of people
are saying, is this a sequel to Moontrap? Was
this by the same people? Was it meant to be a
Moontrap sequel? It wasn't. There was no tie
to it at all. So I wonder if the writer had written
it like Moontrap and it got kind of warped. Well,
I wonder if the person was a fan of it, because
honestly, it plays out perfectly, doesn't it?
It plays out that you've got a cyborg. virus
race thing that's using human bodies and machinery
to take over earth it was perfect absolutely
perfect um yeah very very very much let down
by its writing yeah and the acting and i'm genuinely
surprised by donald sutherland his character
is probably the best character in the entire
thing and he's an arsehole i love the bit where
he sat at his desk trying to kill himself as
well starts with the gun in his mouth then he's
like okay i'll put it to my forehead and then
he suddenly thinks hang on research ship ding
ding ding ding ding you could almost put dollar
signs above his head yeah the man's such a good
actor that you could imagine that that's actually
happening um yeah it's just it was let down by
the other actors like squeak just being this
horribly rubbish Was he meant to be Mexican or
something? I can't quite remember. I don't know
what he was going for. Exactly. Then you've got
the one that's always perpetually miserable.
Why is he perpetually miserable? Why is he like
that? Yeah, just is. Yeah. Then you've got the
ex -Navy. I've gone crazy by the end of it, but
don't worry, I'm going to save you at the end.
Oh, the guy who sets up the torpedo launcher.
Who sets up the two missile launchers. Yeah,
it's just too much. Weird. Just too weird. The
ex -Russian ship person who's still there. Why
is she wearing a gas mask? Why is she hiding
in a cupboard? Yeah. As again, why is she in
disguise? Yeah. I don't think the machine cares
what you look like, love. It's still going to
kill you because it knows you're human. Yeah.
I guess she's hiding from the people. I presume
so. She turned the ship off, hadn't she? Yeah.
Which makes sense. And I love the fact that...
the computer moved itself and that whole idea
was really good and you saw the little bugs kind
of walking around there as well i thought they
there were some really well thought out bits
to it it's just let down by the acting and the
writing yeah yeah um it's not really much else
to say about it it's worth watching it's not
one of those films i'd say oh no it's terrible
don't watch it it's shit if you're looking for
a good sci -fi film to switch your brain off
to that's not too taxing watch this just ignore
the fact that the astronauts are very clearly
not even on wires and just walking very slowly
stretching to pretend they're in space at the
beginning because that was awful yeah uh so yeah
i mean overall i think looking back on it i think
i probably did enjoy it but like you're saying
there was there was a lot of things are wrong
with it, but the best bit is the, the animatronics
and all that stuff. They did a really, really
good job of that. And that is, I think what saves
it for me is how good, because if that had been
bad, I think, you know, if that had been moon
trap bad, then the whole thing would have been
worse than moon trap. Yeah. A hundred percent.
Yeah. But even, and again, it gives you the era
notice how everything was cabled. So it's like
the cyborg that attacks them first. It's got
a cable coming out the back of it leading away.
So it's like, you know, it's being controlled
by someone. Well, it does also say about it needs
power. So you could also have that argument as
well. If it hasn't got its own power supplies,
it needs to be plugged in. Yeah, I just thought
there's a lot of good thought gone into it because
obviously technology hadn't evolved. Wi -Fi existed
in the very basic. standard back then but it
wasn't something everyone knew about so it's
like well why go over the top with explaining
it everyone knows what cables are i think because
have it controlled by this central brain is a
good idea i think it shows that they were thinking
about it because normally they would just just
not have that cable and just go ah the robot
yep and they would just it would just gloss over
it and no one would think about it but because
the cable's there it shows that there's been
thought to it and been like okay this bit does
this is putting now how does it actually work
what what's doing this how does it think how
yeah you know that makes sense can't help but
think as well the squeak cyborg so his best mate
that gets turned into the cyborg they must have
taken inspiration for the borg for him yeah literally
just this headpiece it's like yeah that that's
borg well they see him through the the porthole
and he's like come on i can see on the profile
that's a fucking robot face come on guys yeah
let's not pretend yeah yeah i don't remember
square squeaks up a quadrant of his head being
square yeah it's the silhouette is obvious or
the glowing red eye blue eye sorry isn't it i
think yeah he's ready would have got copyright
oh yes terminator james cameron would have been
after him um i'd actually like to see what they
could do with a remaster of that not a remaster
a remake Didn't they would? If you got the right
team involved. It'd all be CGI now. That's the
problem. It probably would all be CGI. Whereas
if you got a proper effects house on it, you
could make a really good film out of that. Really
good film. I wonder if Short Circuit was made
by the same people. Oh, I don't know. Because
that's kind of very good robotics, isn't it?
That's incredibly good robotics. That was all
remote control on the most part. Oh, I don't
know. I'll have to look that one up. Worth watching.
Just don't expect too much. Yeah. Transfer complete.
Okay, so after some deliberation, because again
I neglected to actually pick anything for next
episode. Oopsie. TJ's recommended The Arrival,
1996 version. So yeah, we're not talking Arrival.
which was a fairly modern film about these obelisks
that turn up on Earth and weird squid creatures.
We're talking The Arrival, 1996, and it's a sci
-fi film starring, and it's a serious film, it's
not a comedy, it's a sci -fi film starring Charlie
Sheen. Charlie Sheen. What was the thing he said?
Tiger. Tiger Blood. Tiger Blood, yeah. Charlie
Tiger Blood Sheen. Tiger Blood Sheen, The Arrival,
1996. That's the next episode. Cool. Command
functions are offline. Thank you, everyone, for
listening. Thank you. To another episode of the
Untitled Sci -Fi Show. It was episode two of
season three. Season three, can you believe it?
No, I really can't. You can find us everywhere.
You'll find all the links on channel84 .co .uk.
We are part of the Studio Channel 84 network
of podcasts. Other notable podcasts in the studio
other than us is obviously The Variety Show,
which is us too. We've got Lightly Used with
Karen and Adam. And we've got Who Takes Socks
Off with Simon and Ross. And I did not stutter.
I did not stutter. Email us at podcasts at channel84
.co .uk. Directly Rob or TJ at the same address.
Thank you to all the wonderful Co -Fi. um sponsors
that's odd trots that is karen that is james
i think that's that's it you got it right yes
thank you thank you thank you we do really appreciate
it uh yeah that's it um if you would like to
help us anyway like share stuff on socials you
know that kind of you know the normal stuff like
share subscribe all that jazz does help gets
the algorithm warmed up Tickle the algorithm's
taint. Yeah, even if you don't like our content,
you can click dislike because that also helps.
Yeah, that helps too, actually. Comments, leave
reviews on the channel as well. Reviews on YouTube,
reviews on the podcast player of choice you use.
All massively helps us. Yeah, don't make me have
to write and then sing another fucking Barbie
song. to get you to subscribe and rate us 10.
It was called Rate Us 10, wasn't it? Yeah. Oh,
dear. Right. Anyway, love you. Love you, too.
See you next time. Bye -bye. Bye. Thank you for
listening to the Untitled Sci -Fi Show. This
station is now shutting down and will be back
in two weeks. May the Force live long and prosper
inside of you. This was a Studio Channel 84 network
show. To find more, head over to channel84 .co
.uk now.