Thank you. Been that long. That's what she said.
Straight off saying, oh, I've gone floppy. Yeah,
they did go floppy. This bit here, the dial on
the stick. Stop pointing at your cock. I need
to see it. You see this really long black rod
here. It belongs in the drawer upstairs. Rad
left it downstairs. It's giving me evils now.
You're in trouble. You still want to listen.
Don't throw stuff. Don't throw stuff because
you might hit this important piece of equipment.
Hello. Happy New Year. Happy New Year. You're
in the doghouse already. I am in the doghouse.
That's my wife and already hates me. So let's
work on your wife. That sounds awful. No, you
cannot double team my wife. It's only about double
teaming. Quick, say something quick to make Gemma
upset. Too late, it's a minute. Oh no, I don't
know how to upset her. Go on then. Have you ever
listened to LBZ? LB... C. Only like clips. Okay,
so it's a radio. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And there's
a news presenter. She's going to get really annoyed
with this. Because the news presenter does this.
And welcome to the news. And we're now going
to be talking about this story. And then we're
going to be talking about this story. Oh. She
has no concept of doing breaths in between sentences.
So all you ever hear is. Oh, so she doesn't like
the. That noise. Oh, she probably doesn't like
the sound of an Asper attack, no. Right, just
so we know, there's no guess the intro. So let's
just get on with the episode. Guess the disorders.
Enter authorization code. Go on then, what have
you been doing in this long break? Oh, shit,
I've already written out my notes. We're on season
three, episode one, by the way. Yay! I've got
to change my season as well. We're in season
four for the Variety Show. Check us out on a
fourth season. Well, what would you like to hear
first? Gaming, TV or films? Let's go with films.
Films, okay. Nothing. TV, nothing. Okay, so I
introduced Gem to Die Hard. She had never, ever
seen Die Hard. She messaged me, actually. And
she agrees it is a Christmas film. Yeah, she
did. It's funny. She always put it off because
she'd always been told it's this over -the -top
action man's film sort of thing. And it's not.
It's actually a really good action thriller.
It's not over -the -top at all. It's clever.
All the ideas behind it. No, she thoroughly enjoyed
it. So that was film number one. Then we'll talk
shit. Then I watched Battleship. Oh, with...
Who's the singer that's in Battleship? Under
my umbrella. The Umbrella Lady. Ella. What's
her name? Rihanna. Rihanna. Yeah, hated it. Just
thought it was absolute trash. Oh, that's a shame.
I thought it was meant to be reasonably good.
Kind of like how Pacific Rim ended up being brilliant.
I thought Battleship was meant to be okay. Yeah.
Or am I misremembering? No, no, no, no, no. Battleship
is trash. including the bit when they start playing
Battleship. Oh, God, it's actually based on the
game. It's actually got a bit where they then
get a radar grid up with A to Z and 1 to 10 on
it or whatever else. You're joking. And they
show, where's it going to stop? Beep, beep, beep,
fire. Do they go, missiles, A3? No, unfortunately,
when they do sink one of the battleships, they
don't say, you sank my battleship. I was very
disappointed by that one. Then we're going to
come up to another good film. We went to see
The Housemaid at the cinema. The Housemaid. I
don't know what that is. Completely over your
head. It's based on a book by an author I don't
know. They've got monsters in it. No, monsters
as in human being monsters, yes. The book Gemma
absolutely loved. Saw the film was coming out
so we went to see it in the new year and it was
really good. Basically, long and short of it
is... Man is married to wife. Wife hires a housemaid.
Turns out it's all a bit of a ploy to escape
the marriage because it turns out he's quite
a nasty man. Right. But really good. Really,
really good. Then we'll go back to shit. I took
a tea to see the SpongeBob movie at the cinema.
Yes, you did. I fell asleep for five minutes.
You didn't miss anything? No, no. He just wiggled
around on me and poked me in the face. Daddy?
Oh, yeah, I am awake, mate. I'll just close my
eyes for a moment. Oh, he noticed, damn. It was
such a long film. Oh, my God. I mean, I'm not
the biggest fan of Spongebob anyway. I don't
get it. Jesus, this was painful. So, yeah, that
was bad. RT's only just watched the other Spongebob
film, hasn't he? The original one with Hasselhoff.
You tell me I didn't watch it, Miranda. It's
got a pirate in it. there's a live action in
it yeah that's the newest no it's not the cinema
it was on tv oh i've got no idea then i think
you've watched the second one oh okay well there's
probably a pirate in most of them because it's
spongebob and it's under the sea and it's easy
to do it's sung by a pirate too isn't it well
the intro is yeah yeah i'm not even there yeah
this is the limit of our knowledge i'm afraid
it all i can tell you it was dire the fact that
anyone got any enjoyment he really enjoyed it
and i'm ashamed to say he's my son because of
that but i don't mean that i don't you know it's
like kids films they've got to put stuff in for
the adults because we're the poor bastards have
to take him there but yeah and there were a couple
of bits like he gets scared and a brick drops
on the floor and he goes oh i've dropped my emergency
brick really funny moment that's the only bit
oh no sorry there's another bit where patrick
then does the same and he says oh patrick you've
dropped your emergency brick he's like what brick
so you know what that was funny hey i'm laughing
but that was it that is funny that was it um
then we'll go to good total recall the original
okay i like the remake I've never seen the remake.
It's good. I kind of refused to watch it. We'll
watch it for the show one time. Oh, okay. Fair
enough. No, really love the original. I can't
go to shit because it's not shit. Zootropolis
2, went to see that as well. And oh, what a movie.
Oh, so good. So much better than the first film.
The first film's brilliant. First film is brilliant.
This is considerably better. It's just, honestly,
there's just so much to it. So much. thought
put into the world that they've created as well.
It's just absolutely wonderful. You cannot get
away with how magical that film is. Have you
watched the series? There's a series? There's
a Disney series, yeah. It's called Zootopia.
Oh, okay, because that's what the films are called
in America. We just get them called Zootropolis
here because there's something called Zootopia
here. Yeah, it's called Zootopia. I think the
series is called Zootopia. I'd be surprised because
I know the films had to change their name here
because there was already something in the UK
and Europe called Zootopia. Well, they might
call it Zootropolis in America, the series, and
Zootopia here. Oh, possibly. But I'm sure there's
a series on Disney. Oh, we'll have to dig that
one out. Yeah, because one of the episodes is
the weasel singing. You're saying that as if
I've seen it when I haven't. No, you've seen
the first film. Yeah. You know they chase the
weasel. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. One episode is
him singing and doing that escape. Oh, awesome.
Okay, I'll have to dig that one out then. That
sounds good. But that's all the films that I
could remember that I've watched. So it's been
quite a busy one. TV or gaming next? TV next.
Right. Well, we're watching Traitors because
Kay has fallen in love with it and Gem thoroughly
enjoys it. So we're watching the latest season
of that. We keep being told to watch that and
we've neglected to do it. Yeah, well, we did.
Then we watched the Celebrity one and... They
kind of fell head over heels with it. Then we
watched season one, really enjoyed it, and now
we're watching whatever season this is. That's
live on TV right now. It's enjoyable. There's
a lot of things I would change if it was me,
but it's not me, and they're making millions
from this, so I'm guessing they're doing the
right thing. So yeah, watch that. And the other
thing I've started is Invincible, which is a
kind of... it's an anime is it anime manga i
guess it is uh basically about a superhero whose
son finally develops his superhero powers and
He's training him. This is up to the point I'm
at at the moment. He's training him and they're
taking on things that are going on around the
world at that time. I know what's coming and
it gets really dark. But you watch it and you're
like, oh, it's a nice cartoon. Then you watch
Omni -Man punch someone's head and it explodes
into a shower of brain, skull, eyeballs. And
it's like, okay, this is highly graphic. This
is not a kid's TV show. Yeah, I've heard it's
good. Is it anything to do with the boys or is
it Eric Kripke or something? i just got some
feeling that or maybe the walking dead there's
something that i watch that is linked to it like
what universe is it in or who is it who wrote
it uh that i'm not sure uh there's no confirmed
crossover however creator robert kirkman has
hinted at possibility of a crossover in the future
saying they could so robert kirkman okay so he's
the guy who does the boys i think Yeah, but I
don't think that's who does Invincible. I can't
really tell you much about it because I've literally
just started watching. Oh, it's Robert Kirkman.
Yeah, okay. I knew there was a link somehow.
It's just highly brutal. Incredibly brutal. As
brutal as The Boys is. I have wanted to watch
it. But animated. So they've gone even more with
it. I know The Boys go down the whole route of
the shrinking man and the urethra and you just...
holy shit the other guy getting sucked off by
an octopus yeah we've stopped watching haven't
we the man has issues rand and i've stopped watching
it because we just he's got too much from rand
i'll watch it at some point but it's not top
of the list the man has issues i wouldn't want
to be near his hard drive if the police turned
up um yeah his poor wife oh yes uh otherwise
and it just takes us to gaming and i've not done
much of that at all just me and t playing goat
simulator 3 because he's thoroughly loving it
yeah that's cute he really enjoys it only because
i've equipped his goat with a rocket launcher
that fires fireworks and sends people into space
and more often than not it doesn't really know
how to deal with it so it fires someone off and
you see them spiral up and it goes bang and About
50 % of the time they might fall down. 50 % of
the other time, though, you just see them carrying
on spiring off into space until they're just
unloaded from the scene. Where am I with it?
It took me a while before I could figure out
you could turn the tornado off because that was
causing me a lot of trouble. Yeah. You've done
the nuke. Yeah, I've done the nuke. There's been
a couple of times I've had to turn the game off
and on again to reset it because there's one
where you have to, like... load up a load of
boxes into someone's house when they're moving
oh my god what a pain in the ass and i could
only get the pink boxes yeah i had to literally
turn the game off to let it reset itself so go
simulate three i 100 %ed it so that makes it
difficult i got everything i did all the challenges
i got all the trophies i did all the hidden all
the hidden stuff 100 %ed it logged on now with
t again and it's like there's loads more now
They put a load more achievements in. They put
a load more trophies to find. They put a load
more missions. They keep adding more. And this
is brilliant. It's the game that keeps on giving.
Near the pink box house, there is now a Swedish
house. Yeah. That you've got to build a flat
pack mission and then you end up in Ikea. Yeah,
I did that one. Yeah, I'm glad that you said
the added because I'm going through it. I've
been a while since I actually played it. But
I was going through it thinking, how did he 100
% this? I'm overwhelmed with the amount of stuff.
Yeah, there's so much to it. And it's not even
DLC either. It's just there. I mean, there is
DLC, but they've also just put a load of free
stuff in. It's wonderful. But you know what?
All the skins are not in the game. There's no
money. And it's all completely, absolutely manageable.
Really easy to get some really fun things. I
mean, I do tend to just like my goat to look
like a goat, but I think I have, I did the Lord
of the Rings one. That was really fun. So I have
the one ring. Well, he sat on the edge and you
didn't head by him. It was fun. There's one bit
I'm stuck on. I'm going around. I have to deliver
a pizza to a pizza delivery man. I cannot find
any pizza delivery men anywhere. Oh. Do you get
a pizza and you press a button and you shoot
pizzas? Yeah, yeah. No, I have got that because
I have got the pizza. I've never seen a pizza
delivery man once. Never seen one. Ah. I'll have
to dig that one out and have a look at it again.
But have you done Bigfoot yet? No. I had to use
the guide to tell me what to do with the church
bell. Oh, yeah. How I was supposed to know that
I had to ring... The Star Wars thing or whatever
it was. I think it kind of implied... I got an
idea that maybe I had to do something, but it's
like, how am I supposed to know what order to
press them in to play the song? Imperial March
or something it says, doesn't it? Unless there's
something hidden that tells you the order, which
I couldn't find. No, no, no. It's just about,
you literally have to have the nerd knowledge
to know. Yeah, I looked it up. I looked it up.
I know. I knew as much as I think I know, but
just tell me. Yeah. Do you know what I mean?
i'm not i'm not gonna lie it's one of my favorite
games it's a lot of fun it is a lot it's stupid
it's stupid but they keep putting all these things
in and there's just so much that's been well
thought out i mean there's a point where you'll
find um whatever they call elon musk you come
across his house and you make his house fly Oh,
that's fun. In fact, you will have seen it. Somewhere
up on one of the hills, you'll see big wind turbines.
They've got giant AA batteries in them. And you've
got to climb up, take the AA battery out, lick
them, bring the AA battery down and take them
to his house, which then makes his house unplugged
and it flies. Oh, that's funny. And then you
get a load of stuff from that as well. There's
the giant alien invasion you probably haven't
done yet. No, I haven't. Where you get a little
UFO and you can fly around the whole map in the
little UFO shooting things. it starts off quite
innocent really it's like you're in the farm
yeah right you're in the farm it's like um jump
do a forward flip do a back flip go up the tower
do like a 15 meter grind on an electric rail
and then all of a sudden you're doing all this
other stuff yeah i was thinking you found the
goat houses as well which acts as your kind of
spawn points you can use yeah the little towers
yeah yeah and then you can go in there and you
go through to the goat kingdom where you have
more to unlock in there that's all very cool
yeah it's just a very oh goat kingdom i haven't
unlocked a goat kingdom oh if you go in one of
the towers you get you go end up in a castle
or this massive i've been in the castle yeah
that's it that's the goat i've got followers
in there now yeah and then the more you unlock
that's where you go to go to the final boss that's
where you turn off the tornado ah right there's
a little um statuette in there i'll tell you
what A simulator game that I played, which I
was like, oh, if it's going to be like Goat Simulator,
it's going to be brilliant. Pigeon Simulator.
Oh, you said it. Atrocious. Wow. I was like,
yes, fine. A prison pigeon game. This is going
to be great. And if it's like Goat Simulator,
great. It's fucking dreadful. Like the flying's
awful. It's a bit like Ghostbusters. There's
a game where... you play this female who goes
into this, like, laboratory, and there's, like,
loads of weird things happening in the laboratory,
and you have to kind of, like, make it all appear.
I'm just going to pause, because I want to tell
you what it's called. Okay. Control. Oh, I've
never played that one. So imagine Control. So
in Control, you've got a bit of a psychic powers,
and there's kind of... weird things going on
like they've got artifacts it's like alan wake
is to do with alan wake you know in that how
you had the weird again another series i've never
played well i've only played the first one but
like there's like there might be a fridge that's
possessed by this thing that's what's going on
in in pigeon simulator and it's like no don't
do any of that just like you have to pick up
like the tutorial was so long teaching you all
how to use all these different Ghostbuster -esque
devices. Oh no, screw that. No, no, no, no, no.
Just let me fly around and shit on people. I
think that's why we need to download Squirrel
with a Gun. I was just about to say, I wanted
something like Squirrel with a Gun. Like a pigeon.
That's what I wanted. No, that's disappointing.
And bear in mind, Goat Simulator started off
as an April Fool. Oh, did it? Yeah, a bit like
Portal did. Someone created a... So Portal, I
think, started off as a Lego mock -up. Oh yeah.
And it was a Lego animation of the portal gun,
and then they ran with it and actually turned
it into the game. And yeah, Goat Simulator, they
just did a... I think Coffee Stain Studios, who
made it, made a fake poster for it. They may
have even done a fake video for it. And the demand
was so high, they built Goat Simulator 1, which
is not a mark on the second game at all. it's
tight it's a fraction of the size even with the
city that they added onto it it is a fraction
of the size but three brilliant so worth it yeah
i'm really enjoying three and i haven't played
one and two but three is great there is no two
There is no Ghost Simulator 2. That was, again,
part of the joke. You just blow my mind. That
was part of the joke. Ghost Simulator 1. Our
sequel's going to be Ghost Simulator 3. Okay,
I like that. That's fun. That completely threw
me because I would have been looking. I want
to play them all. You know what they should have
done? Had the storyline in number one on a cliffhanger
and just not go from there in number three. Like,
imagine watching the... You haven't watched them,
but imagine watching the three Lord of the Rings
films, just going from one to three. They should
have done that. I still love the fact that Goat
Simulator 3 opens a bit like Skyrim. It does,
yeah. It does look like Skyrim, yeah, yeah. Being
towed along by the tractor. Yeah, and the tractor
guy's talking. I think you can cause trouble
whilst you're on the tractor, too. Yeah. Oh,
yeah. Yeah, you can do things. Right. Everything?
Yep, that's everything. What have I been doing?
Lots. Well, lots and also not lots. Lots of time
spending with tea and doing stuff with tea on
this break. Well, it was Christmas holidays,
wasn't it? So it is all about dedicating that
time to your kid. Film -wise, I'm just looking
at my notes. Really only one. I don't really
want to talk about it too much because I actually
want to do it for the show. So I watched Frankenstein.
Oh, I thought that was actually a series. It's
a film, isn't it? It's a film, yeah. Oh, okay,
cool. It's two and a half hours, so it is a bit
of a watch. Guillermo del Toro, who I love. Yeah,
he was... Oh, God, why can I never remember?
The one where the weird creature has eyes in
its hands. I can't think of the name of it now.
It's Hellboy. No, no, no, it's not. But it's
also... Yeah, he did the foreign film. pan's
labyrinth pan's labyrinth yes he did he did have
two hell boys uh he did the shape of water he
has a really good one on netflix i've only actually
watched the first episode of it because miranda
didn't want to watch it because she thought it
was too mental um box of curiosities well i've
heard about this yeah um i'm really into his
stuff so I'm going to watch those. As with everything,
you'll never hear us on it. We'll get to it eventually.
Absolutely brilliant. So spoilers for whether
we do that on the next episode or one later down
the line, but absolutely brilliant. I loved it
all the way through. For me, it was a not picking
my phone up and looking at it film. I was engaged
all the way through. That's pretty good. I really
enjoyed it. And I think that you should try and
convince Gem to watch it with you too, if you
can. okay um it's an interesting take on the
frankenstein's monster film um yeah dr frankenstein
almost being rock star ish kind of really arrogant
he's not likable yeah okay whereas the monster
is it's like a flip oh which uh yeah it's it's
worth a watch but don't forget the original frankenstein
story you do feel sorry for frankenstein's monster
you really do feel sorry for him in this i i
felt very sorry for him you know you could see
the anger and stuff inside but it's all it's
like a nature of a nurture thing and her hers
his is certainly a nurture he is that way because
of what has been done to oscar is his character
because of him he is like the way he is that's
oh i might pop it on in the background tomorrow
while i work then yeah it's worth it because
we'll talk about the end of the show uh that's
really the only film i can think of otherwise
shows the new fallout series is out so we've
watched one episode of it because we were too
busy watching all the stranger things staying
up till stupid o 'clock at night watching like
the newest episodes as they came out because
we didn't want any spoilers not going on our
phones making sure there's neither of us had
anything spoiled so and it didn't get spoiled
for us which is great um another quick one percy
jackson olympians we're watching that's the disney
thing it's okay that's as much as i can say for
it is i'll keep watching it i've only ever seen
the first one when k got into the harry potter
series uh she watched the films up to a certain
number that we let her because we felt everything
after that would be scary i mean i think from
the films onwards that had the mermaids onwards
we just said you're not going to enjoy it so
You'll watch it when you're old, and she has
done, and she understood that since. But we did
try watching Percy Jackson. I watched it. I thoroughly
enjoyed it. I thought the first film was quite
good, but good God, it's a typical Disney where
you kill the mother within the first few minutes.
We're talking about the series. Oh, the series?
Oh. Yes, there's a series. Oh, okay. And it is
good, but also kind of I think that I wouldn't
watch it on my own. I'm only watching it because
Miranda wants to watch it, and that does not
mean I don't like it. But I wouldn't... You wouldn't
choose to watch it unless someone else was there
saying, can we watch this? Yeah, which is why
I don't think you'll probably end up watching
it unless Kay asks you to watch it with her.
I can't imagine you watching it. Does that make
sense? Yeah, well, no, she's back on Young Sheldon,
so we've lost her for another couple of weeks.
Oh, she likes to re -watch it. Oh, yeah, this
is the second re -watch and she just binges.
Is it good? Oh, I thoroughly enjoyed it. In fact,
I prefer it to The Big Bang Theory, which is
what Gem liked. Never watched The Big Bang Theory.
Oh, it was a good enough comedy. It just went
on a bit long for me and became a bit samey in
the last couple of seasons. But for me, I enjoyed
it as a comedy because a lot of the stuff they're
fanatical about is the stuff that I enjoy. Yeah.
Everything about it says I should like it if
I watched it, but I just haven't bothered. Just
quick jump back to Stranger Things. So I'm going
to be very careful. I don't want to spoil anything.
Oh dear god, what time is it? Oh shit. Right,
um, um, okay, okay. New year, new me, new year,
new me. What am I doing? Fuck these two. Again.
How are they still doing this shit? Right, well
okay then, let's just get on with it. This is
spoiler central for Stranger Things. Rob's done
his best, but if you don't want even the smallest
hint of anything Stranger Things related... Please
skip ahead just over four minutes. Peace out,
sisters. Catch you on the next one. Now, where
did I put that paracetamol? So, prefaces, we
are recording on the 7th of January. Yes. That
might mean something. So, there's something going
on online called Conformity Gate. I don't know
why it's got that name. Whatever. Whatever. Whatever.
But in season one, the Briar's mum, whatever
her name is, something Briars, she spends something
like seven days having theories about where Will
is. Right, yeah. And no one believing her, everyone
calling her crazy, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Yes. Now, I'm being very careful here. If you
do not want to know anything about... stranger
things the last season ignore the next few minutes
i'm still going to do my best you've said that
you don't mind but i'm still no i don't mind
there are things that happened in the last episode
uh of stranger things the very last episode which
all imply that's not actually the true ending
because there's so many little hidden things
which do calls backs to other parts of the show,
which are Vecna doing naughty things, manipulating
people, faking stuff. And the episode at no point
implies he's doing anything, but the evidence
is there. Now, did the directors put it there
just to make everyone go crazy? Maybe. Well,
this is it. And that's what I think is the case.
There has been so many... posts online as you
said no spoilers but constantly saying oh look
how the books line up you can spell so and so
is alive still well no the thing is like um when
you see them put the books on the shelf in order
when it looks back at it they're on an order
that they weren't placed on to make a word right
right okay so i'm trying i'm trying my best here
to not spoil anything that means nothing to somebody
who hasn't actually watched the episode yeah
but But there's things that are different colours
is another thing. There's loads of other things,
but also all the dates and all the numbers and
everything supposedly lines up, as in how many
days Will was in the Upside Down. All these different
things and loads of other things that people
have found that line up to something happening
on the 7th of January in real life. Which is
today. Which is today. And obviously it's American,
so we have to wait for American time. But even...
But the reason I think it's fake is that I just
think the Duffer Brothers have just done it to
just make everyone talk about their fucking show
because that's what you would do. But it doesn't
help with Netflix's socials all changing to changing
their stuff for today. So either all of Netflix's
social team are all in on it and are doing silly
things to get the hype train continually going.
well i would say it's 10 30 p .m there is a good
chance that something will have already been
released by now um oh yeah see netflix brazil
put all their stuff in backwards yeah this is
what i'm saying there's all these different things
and it also it just kind of depends on what um
time zone they're doing it Are they going to
do it at midnight? They're doing it for the times
upside down. It's going to be 12 o 'clock the
other side. Yeah. So anyway, as I was speaking
about it, it's still in the slot. I'm on the
day that supposedly they're supposed to be doing
something that might have another episode to
completely actually change how the ending of
Stranger Things was and how amazingly fun that
would be. And I would love it. But at the same
time, I'm still happy with how it ended. I'm
not going to talk about how it ended. There we
are. All done. Enjoy the rest of the show. I
will have to put a Valentino thing in here to
tell people to skip because I think I probably
have said too much. I really don't want to spoil
it. It's not fair to spoil it because it's too
soon. Do put a skip on there because we've always
said it should be at least a month after. Yeah,
it's way too close. It's not fair. I'll give
it another few episodes of the sci -fi show before
I talk about it again, and even then I'll still
put warnings in and still link it because, you
know, people have busy lives. Yeah. My concern
is that Netflix is just going to do what Netflix
does best, and that's we make money from this,
don't we? Spin -off series. Yeah, they're doing
that. Vecna's Day Off. So they're doing some
Vecna's Big Day Out. Traitors with Vecna. The
Ed Gein story, but that was Vecna. It's a really
good... Full on documentary about... Talking
about Ed Gein. Gein, sorry. So there's a great
shot with Will Brise's character at a bar. And
in the bar, a lad comes up to the bar to sit
next to him. And they changed it for that other
character in one of those horror ones. He's the
gay guy. What's he called? The horror... The
real life murderer who was gay in the 80s. Oh,
yeah, yeah. I know who you mean. They've changed
it for him. And they've done such a good job
with it. It's just funny. But yeah, what were
we saying before that? We completely got railroaded
by your spinoff. Yeah, there is a spinoff. They're
doing an animated thing based between season
two and three, an animated thing. And they've
got something coming out in the 12th, which is
like a documentary kind of thing. I mean, that's
cool. I like that kind of stuff. That kind of
reminds me of special features on DVDs. The documentary
would make sense because it's following the kids
as they grow up while they're filming it from
what I've read about it. That makes sense. And
I think that would be quite cool to see. Yeah,
I will watch that because I like special features
on DVDs and stuff. I always enjoyed that. But
no, I'd be intrigued to see. It'd be so funny
if it gets to midnight and absolutely nothing.
Yeah, I mean, that's... that's what i'm expecting
and i i might be a little bit disappointed but
at the same time i'm still happy with how it
ended you know it's they did a better job at
ending one of the biggest series on tv than game
of thrones did so midnight all the episodes now
only play backwards That would be brilliant.
Yeah, I'd be up for that. I'd watch it all again.
So that's all the things we've watched that I
can think of. Game -wise, I've played a fair
few games, streamed a fair amount. I've had technical
issues every single one. So sorry, anybody that
does watch the VODs. No one's watching it live,
one, because we just don't have enough following,
I think. But also... I'm announcing it like 20
minutes before I'm doing it. Because it's always
last minute. We need to form a proper schedule.
And I think... Well, we will. Just to interrupt
you, I definitely will as soon as I've ironed
out all of my technical problems. 100%. Because
right now, I just kind of feel it's a bit like,
you know, you're there if you're there. Kind
of, you know, we went through half an hour you
were in the stream and no one could hear you.
I even, I'm pretty sure I asked if people could
hear you. And the people watching... didn't say
until you said to me that no one could hear you
after you'd already gone. And I said, oh, no
one could hear him. And then Chris in the chat
goes, yeah, I couldn't hear a thing you were
saying. Thanks, Chris. Because I didn't have
the stream up on my phone. And what's really
annoying, your mic thing was going up and down.
I could hear you. Your mic thing was going up
and down. You were unmuted. Everything in, it
was not OBS, whatever it's called. was telling
me they should be able to hear you. Everything
was telling me that. So I don't feel bad that
they didn't hear you. I feel annoyed that the
software was not giving me the correct information.
We need to have a proper play with it. But I
was going to say, maybe we should schedule like...
two hour stream once a month that's the guaranteed
day that we're always going to do it yeah do
12 of them in a year and then any additional
ones on top of that just bonus ones really excuse
me yeah i agree with that as there's a few games
i mean i sent you a game today on facebook um
let someone put a video up that's just come out
i think it's an apogee game where the monster
learns how you're hiding and how you're running
and starts just like I'm going to wait here for
you because I know you're going to come back.
Oh, fuck that. I haven't seen this that you said.
Yeah, I tagged you in it this morning. Do I watch
it live right now? I think you should. Dare I?
I think you should. I don't know if it was a
video or not. If it's a video, it mentioned me
in a post and mentioned me in a comment. Oh,
yeah. You run, it walks. You hide, it waits.
You fight, it learns. The hunter is coming. Total
chaos continues to haunt players and it's only
getting even worse. New game plus. Wait, it's
total chaos. Yes. New Game Plus is coming early
this year, introducing Monster That Remembers
You. Oh, is that the one you've really been playing?
That's what I've been playing. Oh! Yeah, New
Game Plus is coming early this year, introducing
Monster That Remembers You. See, it's all on
Game Pass now, so it's on the PlayStation and
on Xbox, which means I can happily just sit on
my sofa and play it. Yes, I mean, what I will
say about Total Chaos is that it's a difficult
one to stream because it's so fucking dark. I
kept saying it when I was streaming it, so I
didn't... I mean, I didn't do it last time because
I was playing 360 games, but it... it's so dark
it's not a good one to watch for that aspect
it's fine if you want to watch me just shit my
pants but at the same time as that the now the
ghost thing has lost its scariness to me because
now i know i can kill it right so i just turn
around and kill it and like the little guys unless
they jump out at me they're not even remotely
scary they're basically like imps or normal guys
in doom they're not even remotely scary now because
i know i can just whack them and dodge them We
will still have to do Alien Isolation from the
beginning. I'm too scared to do Alien Isolation.
No, we will sit together on the sofa. We'll hold
hands if we need to. I'm too scared. Oh, no,
with the lights. We'll have all the lights turned
off and have the lights around the TV. Oh, God,
yeah. Oh, my gosh. Yeah, we'll have to film ourselves
playing that. With the surround sound on as well.
Yeah, oh, gosh. Even now I'm getting scared of
it. All right, so I played some Free City Games
on stream, did some stuff on stream. They're
on our... youtube channel which is tom and rob
in the studio yep it's all you know nice space
but you can just write that it does does show
up we actually show up on youtube hooray for
us uh my streams are quite long they're like
two hours maybe even three hours or two and a
half hours i think the last one was and yeah
you won't hear tj speak but he is there you'll
hear my side of it but you know it is what it
is whatever uh other games i've just been going
through So you do this, get points with Bing.
Yes. My brother -in -law does it too. He does
a few of the Chris, but he get his through Xbox.
You get the same points. Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah.
So I was like, okay, I'm going to do that too.
So like through the December, I played eight
Game Pass games, which meant I got 250 points.
Yeah. Playing for 15 minutes, whatever. Which
meant I played some weird games. I played a game
called A Game About Digging a Hole. You just
dig a hole in the ground. That's it. You dig
a hole in you. There's like, the story is there's
buried treasure. in this garden, so you buy the
house and dig a hole. Get money, upgrade your
shovel, get money, get a jetpack, get money,
have a bigger bag, get rocks, sell them. That's
it. Okay. Achievements don't unlock until you've
completed it. So you have to complete the game
once, and then the second time you play, you
get the achievements. That's a really clever
way of making you play the game more. There's
also... a little hack that i didn't know till
after i played it the first time which i'm glad
because i probably would have just cheated on
the patio there's a little tile very small tiles
on the patio there's a very particular one if
you put your crosshair on the corner of it and
shoot like use the attack button on it or something
on it it gives you 10 000 gold oh and you keep
doing it and you can save infinite gold basically
okay so uh i didn't know brother -in -law hadn't
told me that till i would already started my
second playthrough and was going through trying
to do achievements i was like how did you do
this how did you do this and he goes oh you just
get them do the money glitch i'm like what so
how because i told him about the game and he'd
already fully completed it and i told him about
the game and i'd already halfway through it i
was like how have you completed so fast how anyway
that's how he did it so then i did it because
i did it when i was like okay now i've completed
the game properly i want the achievements now
so fair enough which meant i had to actually
complete the game two or three more times to
do it anyway still fun um oddly fun because you
know i just told you it's a game about digging
a hole oddly kind of games can be like it hit
something in my brain yeah i am very much there's
a game called blue dragon on the s sorry everyone
I'm already going longer than you. I'm not finished
yet. Called Blue Dragon on the Xbox. I think
the art design is the same guy that did Dragon
Ball Z, so it looks the same. But it's an RPG
turn -based combat, right? You can search everything.
And when there's nothing in it, a little thing
goes, boop, nothing. There's an achievement for
getting something like a million nothings. So
it encourages you to search. Every single fucking
item in every single room that you ever see,
ever. I could not complete the game because I
was too busy. Nothing, nothing, nothing. Making
sure because I wanted the achievement. Getting
every single fucking thing. It's like carrying
the gnome through Half -Life 2. How much of a
pain carrying that fucking gnome through Half
-Life 2 is. I did it on my first playthrough.
Left 4 Dead 2. No, it's in Half -Life 2. Is there
a... Yeah, because I remember you drive the fucking
thing in the car. It's a wedge in the car. Because
the gnome is in Left 4 Dead 2. Yeah, there's
one in Left 4 Dead 2 and that was a pain in the
arse because one of us had to carry the fucking
gnome. With Mark whacking the witch every gnome.
Who's got the gnome? Who's got the gnome? I'm
running. I don't care. No, pick him up. You take
the gnome all the way through the entire game.
I think you even have to take it through that
town where you get the razor gun. Yeah. Oh, I
might have to play that again. Yeah. I've completed
Marvel Cosmic Invasion now. Well, the story,
and I've been going through achievements and
stuff. Exhibition 30, play more of that. A game
called Clover Pit. It's very weird. I'm not sure
I actually like it. It has like one of those,
what are they called? You pull the lever and
you get the three things. One -armed bandits
is the money shover. No, one -armed bandit is
the one you pull the handle down. A fruit machine.
A classic fruit machine. That is a one -armed
bandit. Well, that, I didn't really get it. Didn't
like it very much. Anyway, that's the games I've
been playing. I played a couple more today, but
I can't remember what they're called already.
Oh, Little Nightmares. It's called Little Nightmares
I started playing. I played like two minutes
of it, so sorry. I can't tell you if it's any
good or not. It looks quite nice. That's it.
Shall we actually get on with the fucking show
now? We've been talking for nearly the entire
time. Yeah, we probably better do, haven't we?
Accessing library computer data. The fifth element.
Let's cut straight to the chase. It's a good
film. Fucking love this film. Yeah, great. Again,
I didn't write a single... No, I wanted to enjoy
watching it. Because I didn't want my phone in
my hands watching it. I just wanted to watch
it. Gem watched it with me. She thoroughly enjoyed
it as well. I'm glad she enjoyed it. I think
she told you the one scene that she didn't like
is the fight scene where she's in the singer's
room and she beats up all of the rubber -faced
monsters. And to be fair... She's not wrong.
It's not a good fight scene. Is she saying because
it's not good or it doesn't make sense? Not good
as in it's not good. It doesn't look good. Yeah,
there is a bit where there's a comic. It's because
it's skirting some weird fine line between action
and comedy. And sometimes I don't think it lands
on one side. There is a punch in that where she
like goes, slaps the monster like a wet fish
on his face. That's dumb. It felt Men in Black.
It's the sort of thing you'd expect in Men in
Black. I think that's a really good comparison
because I think artistically it's very Men in
Black too. That's interesting. I never thought
about that. It is. It fits kind of the scope
of what Men in Black did as well. You're absolutely
right, yeah. I'll tell you what, it's an odd
film. As much as I enjoy it, it is an odd film.
I'm going to say a negative about it. The only
thing I've never liked about it is the end. I
don't like how... quick it feels at the end when
they actually are putting the elements down and
doing that bit. And then her being the middle
one. And the I love you stuff, I don't think
is earned at all. No, God no. Even Miranda, who
doesn't normally do it, she groaned. It's just
like, ugh. It's the atypical, you need to have
some sort of love interest in there now. I mean,
what the fuck, Bruce Willis? Why would you go
around kissing an unconscious woman? That makes
absolutely no sense. I know, like, Even back
then, before all of the stuff that we'd be saying
nowadays. Oh yeah, the whole Me Too scene was
not in the future at that point. I'm sure I would
have been like, ooh, really? Yeah, it's just
weird. It's a really weird decision to go with.
And I didn't really realize it before. Is she
supposed to be the genetically reborn version
of the alien that gets crushed at the start?
You know the one who gives him the key? No, no,
no, no, no, no. No, she is the fifth element.
So what you see at the beginning is they take
the fifth element out of the temple and they
take it away. And the fifth element is in kind
of a sarcophagus style thing. But they grow her
from the hand that was holding the case. No,
they grow her from the hand that they recover
from the crash site. So the ship crashes and
they say this is the only thing that survived.
But I'm pretty sure it's the hand holding the
case. No. Because the case is missing a handle
and the hand is holding it. So the... Oh, what's
the word? She's meant to have had a case with
all four stones in. Yeah. And that's what the
hand is holding. So the fifth element is holding
a handbag basically with the four stones in.
Yeah. And that is from the shipwreck. They recovered
the bag, which is empty. Yeah. And they recover
the hand holding the broken... That's what she's
grown from. That's what she's grown from. The
DNA left in... Yeah, but that hand is the hand
of those weird aliens. No, it's not. Of those
big robot things with the small heads. She's
inside a sarcophagus holding it. Oh, sorry. Okay.
She's inside kind of a... That's what they take
out. The thing with the head that's looking up.
Yeah, you know when they... Could you see the
action there like anyone could see me? Do you
know when they take her out of the temple at
the beginning on the hovering thing? Yeah, okay.
That's that. And that's what she's in and that's
what's holding the... Okay, right. The case.
somehow i missed that somehow i missed that point
and i to be honest mate for years and i mean
years having watched that i always never looked
closely enough and always assumed it was some
weird alien snail thing in that case because
it doesn't instantly look like a hand holding
something it's filmed at a very odd angle so
it's like what actually is that right good things
about this film all of the set designs Brilliant.
All of the costumes, brilliant. CGI, very good.
Costumes all done by Jean -Paul Gaultier. Yeah,
I kind of knew that, but then when it did come
up right at the beginning, I was like, oh, I
can't believe it. Apparently he used to be on
set and he'd go around all the extras, making
sure that it was worn exactly as it was meant
to be. That sounds pretty on point, doesn't it?
It's great. Like, everything about how it looks.
Fucking, what's that guy? What's that guy called?
is it chris rock oh my right chris tucker not
chris chris sorry chris sorry chris tucker fucking
hell like i would that's if he is an annoying
character if i walked away from that film and
said there's one thing that really grated on
me it's chris tucker's character and i know he's
meant to yeah it's almost too much for me it's
like The realisation he's licking that woman
out. And he keeps going out and Rad is like,
what's going on? And I'm like, Rad, he's licking
her out. And she's like, oh my God. I don't actually
find him funny apart from two points in the film.
He's meant to be funny all the way through. I
actually find him annoying. And I think you're
right. He's meant to be annoying. So in that
case, he's done the right job. But they've done
it too much. I was giggling at the going down
on the women thing. I found that a bit funny
because I'm like that. But also when they're
at the stone bit and they've just done it all
and they've just saved the world. And then the
young priest says something and it makes Chris
Tucker's character jump. Yeah. That gets me every
time I watch it. I laugh at that bit because
he really kind of reacts so instantly and so
perfect. Almost like. It's not scripted like
it was Adlib and he actually does jump and stays
in character when he jumps. He's like, oh my
God. I'm going to have to find a clip and put
it in. But yeah, it's funny. Yeah, I mean, for
those of you that haven't seen the fifth element,
then the story is very simple. It opens in Egypt.
We've discovered something, found a temple. It
turns out this temple is looked after by a group
of people that have taken it on from their fathers
and their fathers and their fathers. And inside
it, there are five elements. They're basically
the Magi, aren't they? Yeah, exactly. The five
elements in there are to repel evil when it comes
to her. The aliens turn up in their very clunky
robot suits and take it away, saying it can't
be trusted in the hands of humans, but they'll
bring it back just in time if it's ever needed.
Then we come into the modern day, well, future
modern day. Bruce Willis is having a bad day,
just like every film Bruce Willis is in. He's
having a bad day. He's a taxi driver. Aliens
come back because there's a big nasty thing in
the sky now. They crash because they've been
shot out of the sky by aliens. they clone main
character from it which is the fifth element
uh bruce willis falls in love running around
trying to find out what's going on finding the
four elements along with the fifth element blah
blah blah bad guys trying to get him as well
um because he's trying to do a deal with this
bad thing in the sky and then we send the bad
thing in the sky away job done that is the story
of the fifth element and it's remarkably it moves
very smoothly yeah From scene to scene, it just
works. It's not a num -bum thing. There's no
point in it that you sit there thinking, this
is dragging on a bit long now. If I'm going to
be horribly anal about it, it's the Chris Tucker
stuff that I think kills it for me. I could live
without that. But the character's done remarkably
well and is probably hitting the mark that he
was given. Who had the easiest job? Fucking the
president. Oh God, yeah, the president. Every
scene he was in, he was walking to his seat or
on his seat. So cast list, Bruce Willis, Mila
Jovovich, Gary Oldman, Ian Holmes, Chris Tucker,
Luke Perry, Lee Evans. Yeah, Lee Evans. Sweating
his fucking tits off. As normal. As normal. I
mean, what an amazing cast. I mean, Gary Oldman
start with a Zorg. What a great casting. Now,
question for you. When the evil thing is getting
pissed off with his character, something starts
dripping down his head. What the hell is it?
Is it meant to be blood? Is it meant to be hair
dye? Is his hair meant to be melting? What on
earth is it meant to be? I think it's the psychic
power that the bad guy has. Does it? You're talking
when he does it to... He's talking to it, isn't
he? Saying, look... something's gone wrong we've
got the case but the stones aren't there we're
getting the stones don't worry and this is talking
to gary oldman's character yeah gary oldman's
character is talking to the evil thing in space
isn't he because they're talking the original
time i ever saw it i thought he starts sweating
and then you get that black plastic thing on
his head was maybe covering or fixing something
wrong with him and the monster's doing it to
him and it's causing the wound to open but just
watching again i think it's just I think that
the monster is just able to do that. And he's
like crushing his head or whatever. You see,
I just assumed it was because he was getting
so hot. You see the sweat's dripping off him.
And this alien we know is meant to be this giant
fireball in the sky. I just assumed that he's
getting this really hot and it's melting his
hair dye and the sweat. And it's the hair dye
and the sweat coming down is what I always assumed
it was. I thought it was blood. I mean, if it's
blood, maybe it'd be better coming out of his
nose. You know, like you could see it's actually
doing something to him. I don't really know.
But there's a really great scene where Gary Oldman's
selling weapons to those monsters. I love that
gun. I've seen some great stuff from the guy
who does Tested. I don't remember his name. He
was an American guy who builds props. He has
made that gun. And apparently that prop is like,
there's like three different versions of the
gun. And it does shoot the net. It does have
a flamethrower. It does. It doesn't do the bullets,
but it does. There's different versions. There's
multiples of that gun. So it's a proper prop
that can do all those things it can do other
than obviously the home seeking bullets. That's
very cool. Oh, this is interesting. Mila Jovovich
beat out over 3 ,000 women who auditioned for
the role. Yeah, I bet she also beat out the director
because he's her husband now, isn't he? Oh, is
he? He did all the Resident Evil films, if I
remember correctly. Oh, is that why? Oh. Yeah,
and she's in all those too. Ah, fair enough.
I'm not implying that's why she was cast. I'm
sure they just fell in love during the film.
And I'm sure that's why James Gunn's wife turns
up in all of James Gunn's things. Of course.
Because she auditioned and got the role based
on that. Absolutely. 100%. Oh, dear. What did
you make of the robot suit? You know, they're
clunky things when they're kind of coming in.
Oh, they're fine. Really slow. Really massively
impractical going through doorways. But yeah,
it's all right. It's an alien, isn't it? It can
do what it wants. It doesn't have to conform
to any kind of rules. No, I mean, what I think...
And going back to what we were saying about,
or what I was saying about it being a bit like
Men in Black, it's got a fair few different sort
of styles to it. Some of it is kind of Men in
Black style, like we've said. There's bits as
well that I kind of put in going, you know, this
feels very kind of Terry Gilliam, very kind of
12 Monkeys, very surrealist. So the bit where
they're constantly coming up to the ticket booth
saying, no, I'm this person. The way it's filmed
as well, again, reminds me of another director
out there that does Wes Anderson almost. It's
a weird scene though because they've got that
massive pile of trash and they make a comment
saying, I'm very sorry about the pile of trash.
That's it. Okay, there's a pile of trash there.
You're like, okay, we're not going to explain
any more of that. No. No, are they on strike?
Who knows? Sorry about the pilot trash, everyone.
It's fine. But do you see what I mean? It's kind
of this surrealist kind of side to it that is
just odd. It works, though, because again, if
you think about, well, it's an integration of
all these alien races. Yeah, well, why wouldn't
it be there? True. So the scene right near the
beginning where she falls into Bruce Willis'
taxi. Yes. Excuse me again. I keep burping everyone.
Sorry. And they do the escape. Spoilers. And
they're flying through the multiple levels of
cars. Yes. They do that in the second Star Wars
film. Attack of the Clones. Yep. And they also
do that in Space Precinct, which was the Gerry
Anderson space cop TV show that you don't remember.
Would argue it's better in the fifth element
than when they do it in the Star Wars film. Yes.
Visually, even though it's quite a lot earlier.
And just the actual whole scene itself is a bit
more kind of you feel like there's danger here.
Because he keeps crashing it. And he keeps getting
caught. And the McDonald's. Fucking hell, the
McDonald's stuff. Yeah. Branding in there. Best
scene. I don't necessarily have much of a problem
with it. It fitted. So, in that scene, you have
two police officers waiting at the drive -in
as he flies past them, doesn't he? You do, yeah.
And the one that's driving is a very portly person.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Did you recognise him at all?
i kind of could i i'm not gonna be able to tell
you who he is or what he's in but certainly he's
the captain oh is he now you say it and then
into the latest seasons where they brought him
back in whatever it was season eight captain
hollister yeah he had a face that made me go
I recognize that face, but not in a way that
made me go, it's on the tip of my tongue. I now
have to go on a massive IVD search about who
this person is. No, that is the captain from
Red Dwarf. He crops up in all sorts of things.
Now, this was 97. And as you said, the effects,
very good. Very good for 97, I think. It shows
the evolution of effects though, doesn't it?
Let me find out when Attack of the Clones comes
out. In a year's time, so 1998. Armageddon came
out. Armageddon came out. Armageddon was released
a year after this. And I would say, as good as
the fifth element is, Armageddon is a whole different
level on how it looks and the quality of effects.
Brucey Willis. He shouldn't have died. Ben Affleck
should have been the one left on the asteroid.
Spoiler. It's been long enough, okay? Get over
it. Maybe we should watch Armageddon next year.
Yeah, next year. We're going to show Kay Armageddon.
Oh, maybe we should watch that for the next show.
I want to close my eyes. Yeah, it's been a long
time since the Armageddon. I want to say goodbye
to you, Bruce. It's the drill team, isn't it?
Armageddon's the drill team, yeah. Yeah, as I
said. No. Gracie isn't your job, Ben. Your job's
blowing up that bloody asteroid. Let her dad
go home. Yeah, that's an old man. He deserves
it. Yeah, you're young. You haven't experienced
life. Bruce Willis has a bloody business to manage.
He's got staff. Yeah, think about that, Ben.
All these people are going to be out of the job
because you are too selfish to die. To be fair,
he did want to die. It's Bruce being a knob,
making him not die. But yeah, I was joking aside.
The difference a year can make in effects. And
I know obviously the budget for Armageddon was
probably considered. Let's have a look. You look
up the budget for Fifth Element. How do we do
that? IMDB, it will tell you its budget. Oh,
does it? I'm already on Armageddon. I'm already
on Armageddon. Oh, are you? So am I. Okay, you
do Armageddon and I'll do, what am I doing? Fifth
Element. Yep, Fifth Element. The fifth. Okay,
so I've got the budget. Okay, where do I find
it? Scroll all the way down to box office. All
the way down, all the way down, all the way down.
Videos, images, awards, critics, parents guide,
did you know? Yep. Storyline, keywords, details.
Box office. Box office. Okay. What was your budget?
We should play Top Trumps with this. In FRF.
FRF. I've got no idea what that is. Frankfurters.
72 million francs. 75 million Frankfurters estimated.
FRF, it says. FRF currency. What the hell is
FRF? It's the French francs. Oh, it is. Okay.
It's the worst French film. Right, so hang that.
So that makes sense then with the designer being
involved, doesn't it? Let's just, 75 million
FRF to USD then. I know this is going to be current
rates. It's close enough. Yeah, we'll just have
to accept that. I mean, with the large numbers,
it's probably going to be a few million, but
you know. Well, that's what, yeah. 75, 1, 2,
3. I mean, it will do it. It will backdate the
year. $13 million. Oh, that's a massive difference.
$13 million. Okay. That can't be right. Well,
opening weekend, I can tell you what it made.
Yeah, go for it. $17 million in its opening weekend.
So it made money, if that's the case. Okay, yeah,
fair enough then. But it was $140 million and
its opening weekend was $36 million. Oh, that's
rough. With a gross US and Canada of $201 million.
Okay. Gross worldwide, $553 million. Okay, well,
gross US and Canada, $63 million. Gross worldwide,
$263 million. Oh, what? So it made 63 million
on its opening week. Oh, no, gross for US. Gross,
yeah, yeah. So that didn't, so Armageddon didn't
do very well on its opening weekend then. 36
million for an opening weekend. Not bad. Oh,
36. I thought you said six. No, 36 million. 36
million. Okay, yeah, quite a lot. But also that
explains why the quality of the effects are so
much better. But then it didn't make, it didn't
beat its budget in its first weekend. Whereas
this beat its budget in its first weekend. Well,
to be fair, I think most TV series beat its budget
now. That's really shocking. If that's true and
it worked out about $13 million, that's amazing.
Well done, Armageddon. Especially when you consider
the number of the big names in it. Like you said,
Gary Oldman wouldn't have been cheap. Bruce Willis
wouldn't have been cheap. Yeah, well, certainly.
I've got to finish. As far as I'm aware, this
is one of her first films, right? It's the first
thing I remember of it. I thought it was her
first film. Let's have a look, because I'm on
her thing here right now. Fifth Element budget,
because I can't believe it was that little. All
the way down. Oh, there you go. The budget for
The Fifth Element was approximately $90 million.
It was considered one of the most expensive European
films ever made. okay well there you go then
so whatever the number they've got on imdb that's
been plucked out of someone's butthole yeah so
okay well she was in other stuff i know she was
in tv a couple of small roles in tv shows oh
it's not putting it in order oh they ruined imdb
recently it's one of my favorite thanks not act
like an actress here we go right She was in stuff
in 1988. She was in something in 1991, 92. She
was in Chaplin in 92. Okay, as far as I can tell,
this is the first time she's a main character.
Right, okay. Yeah. I guess she's on Dazed and
Confused. She's on the front cover of Dazed and
Confused. Oh, God, she is. Yeah, so that was
before. That's an awful film. I've never seen
it. Fuck, it's got Matthew McConaughey in it.
Yeah. Wow. That was 93, by the way. Same INDB
rating. Oh, really? And a higher... Is the square
number the user rating? I think so. Oh, and that's
the meta score. It got... Wow. Days Unconfused
got an 82 meta score. Fifth Element got 52. This
is why... Maybe I need to watch it as an adult
than Days Unconfused. These things don't match
up, really. Oh, good, no. It's pointless. It's
pointless reading them sometimes. It really is.
No, she's in Zoolander. Right. I don't remember
it being in Zoolander. Anyway, we've massively
got its tangent here. Yeah, but we haven't. It's
still linked back to the fifth element. Because
we're getting there. Zoolander. Oh, dear. Yeah,
go watch it. That's the best way, the thing to
say about it. No matter what era, no matter how
much it was and so on, it's a cracking piece
of science fiction. It really is good. Yeah,
it's brilliant. It's one of the better ones that
we've watched. I'm still chasing that. the thing
vibe because i love that film so much that's
my favorite thing that we've done it's yeah no
fair i'm chasing that i need more something more
things like that yeah i mean i want to watch
the i think i grew up watching the steve mcqueen
version of the blob and i know there's a modern
version of the blob as well oh dear god i bet
that's shit oh probably Transfer complete. Right,
complete change of plan on anything. We've just
been discussing what to watch. Armageddon will
come. Armageddon will come. But that will be
after Traitors has finished and I can get the
TV away from the Beeb. And Frankenstein will
also come as well because I really want to talk
about it. When Mrs. Frankenstein goes. Oh God,
what's in my hand? It's detached. He's done a
film with Mila Djokovic as well. That will come
as well eventually. We're going to watch. A film
from 1999, you just brought it up, called A Virus.
Yeah, Donald Sutherland and Jamie Lee Curtis.
William Baldwin, one of the Baldwins. Yeah, the
Baldwins are in it as well. I watched it one
evening, probably be about 2001, 2002. In fact,
probably about 2003, 2004 actually. I'd just
finished at the pub and it was on late night.
And I came back, it was midway through, and I
watched it and managed to re -watch it again
somehow. um and i just thought it was actually
quite a fun kind of horrorish style film and
i re -watched it semi -recently a couple of years
ago now i think and it was better than i remembered
uh so you said about the thing and it taking
over things i thought well why not go for a bit
of a a proper sci -fi attack on that that's it
next time virus Anyone who wants to watch along,
there's a version of it on YouTube. Hollywood
Remastered. It's got 4 .2 thousand likes. It's
about an hour and 14 minutes. You'll be able
to find it if you just put Virus1999 into YouTube.
There you are. Command functions are offline.
Right. Thanks everyone. Thank you. Welcome back
if you're back. Welcome to the show if you're
new. Thanks for listening. We are Rob and Tom,
Tom and Rob, whichever you prefer. The Rob. This
has been the Untitled Sci -Fi Show. We also have
multiple podcasts from the Studio Channel 4.
Channel 4? We are not Channel 4. Studio Channel
84. Coming up on Channel 4, Sesame Street. Yeah,
Studio Channel 84 network of indie podcasts.
Give me a break. It's been a few weeks. I'm a
little bit rusty. He's a little bit rusty. A
little bit rusty. And that is obviously The Unsigned
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We also have Karen and Adam, or Adam and Karen,
whatever you prefer as well, from Lightly Used.
uh simon and ross or ross and simon i nearly
fucked that up i don't know why i always fuck
that one up i'm sorry guys so do i i don't know
why have a listen to uh the christmas special
was christmas special that we both appear in
i was drunk they are drunk you're sober i was
very confused as to what was going on very i
couldn't hear them very well because i was in
a pub so if you notice when i'm talking so my
audio quality is terrible because i'm in a pub
on my phone but also i couldn't really hear them
so i'm a bit delayed as well they speak somehow
they've got um a lot of their guests who've been
on their show on it bonnie was on it i think
it is bonnie or bon she's hilarious bonnie blue
not the lady called but she's fucking hilarious
genius um yeah anyway go listen to that um Thank
you so much to all our Kofi supporters. Remind
me, Karen, James, and... John, Oddtrots. Oddtrots,
yeah. Thank you very much. We really appreciate
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Discord links on there. That's it really. Guess
the intro will be back next week. Keep your ear
out. I have started writing sci -fi shit. Fucking
hell. Shit show. What is going on with my brain?
I haven't forgotten my own fucking show that
I make. Shit show. I've started writing one.
It's coming. Give it a few weeks. Bang. That's
it. Thank you, everyone. Love you. Love you.
Bye. Thank you for listening to the Untitled
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