WEBVTT

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I don't know what the heck is going on. I can

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tell you that it's impossible to translate from

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an audio file. I would need to be there to interact

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with them. Take better care of your teeth and

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fuck a lot more. Hey, we don't serve their kind

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here. What? You mustn't be afraid to dream of

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a bigger daughter. You will ride eternal, shining

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and growing. It is, they've moved the fucking

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cucumbers, the pricks. It's like literally walking

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around, it's like, why are the cucumbers here?

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They're three hours away from where they were.

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This is not right. Everybody we're talking about,

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why do Tesco's change their locations or their

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items? And TJ would like to know why the cucumbers,

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specifically the cucumbers, have moved. Can I

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just say? During COVID, we were so lucky that

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the arrows were the direction that I walk the

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aisles. Because if they were, I would have been

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broken. I could not have coped with that. Let

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me tell you, right. So aside from obviously all

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the terrible things about COVID. It made shopping

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a wonderful experience. Oh, it did. You got to,

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there was barely anyone in there. I got to just

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have my headphones on. I wore a gas mask for

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a few times and no one talks to you. You have

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to go down every aisle because you have to follow

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the lines, which I normally would do anyway.

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Unless I'm in a rush, I'll shove Miranda and

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tea around the place really quick and skip us.

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We don't need to go there. We don't need to go

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there. But then I always go up and down every

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aisle. And then you'd be like, I'll come home.

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Do you remember Miranda? And I'd be like. that

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person come right next to me when I was getting

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the yoghurts. Like, can you believe the fucking

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cheek of it? Does she even know how far two metres

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is? Oh, I love it. Hello, by the way. You're

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also in trouble. You're very bad. With your wife

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or my wife? No, with T. Why? You made him cry.

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Oh, stop it. Did I make him cry? You made him

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cry. I haven't seen him. You did. You jump scared

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us in Tesco a couple of weeks ago. Oh, I did,

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yeah, yeah, yeah. And then you ran away with

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your tea, running away from me, and Mighty just

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burst into floods of tears thinking, they've

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run away from me. Not from him. Yeah, he thought

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you'd run away from him. Oh, you should have

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texted me and I would have come back. No, you

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were gone by that point. We got him back quite

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quick as well. Oh, okay, right. But, oh, he was

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proper, proper gone. Oh, yeah, that's because,

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you know. the conversation outside of podcast

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worlds there was a joke between you and jim which

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i enjoyed winding you up about and then we bumped

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into each other in tesco's and i just brought

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it up randomly and ran off before you could get

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me yes that was it that was it well it's something

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to do with a summer exam anyway who cares welcome

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to the entire soft show i'm rob that's tj miranda's

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over there somewhere there's dogs in the house

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there's cats everywhere let's get on with it

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enter authorization code Really awkward for everyone.

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TJ just told my wife to slightly pull out. No,

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I told you to slightly pull out for your wife.

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There's a difference, Rob. You won't be able

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to hear Miranda, but you might be able to hear

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her cackling over there. Right, let me just start

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this again. Okay, so we... Oh, I've just closed

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the file. This is just a disaster. Disaster.

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Let's go all the way back down. Right, so we

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do have a half winner. James. Not saying his

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surname, just James. Just James. Half the person.

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Yeah, James from Studio Channel 84, James. He

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got every single one on his first try, but he

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couldn't get the connection between them. He

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had his own connection, which was valid. There

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was another connection of all of these. Oh, really?

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But it wasn't the connection I wanted. I'll tell

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you at the end. So for Miranda's benefit, there's

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going to be six. sci -fi or sci -fi adjacent

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clips you just need to guess what film it is

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so yeah what i was going to say we're going to

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do it slightly differently if that's okay we'll

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go through it and i'm just going to say what

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the film was first And then we'll get to the

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end and I'm going to explain what I think my

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connection is and why. Yeah, that's exactly what

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we're going to do. So at the moment, we're just

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going to go through each one and you're going

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to try and guess what the film is. He already

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knows what they are, so we're going to let you

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go first because he's got every single one right

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because he told me and we've already had this

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discussion. No, we haven't. Yeah, you sent me

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all the answers. No, no, no, no. I said, is the

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connection this? Oh, you didn't tell me the answers.

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No. Okay, right. He's got the connection right.

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He doesn't know why. Oh, I do know why. You and

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James should have spoke. I do know why. Right,

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so you're just going to have to, if you can.

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Guess what the film is. They're all films, I'm

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pretty sure. And then at the end, there's a connection

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between all of them. No, they're not all films.

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The fifth one was not a film. Oh, hang on. Fucking

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hell, I did this. How do I not know this? Let

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me just look. Oh, no, yes, you're quite right.

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One of them wasn't films. One of them wasn't

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films. Okay, so shall we get ready and start?

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Let's just get on with it. Number one. You know,

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people like you are the reason I was afraid to

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go to school as a child. There you are. That's

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the first one. This blew me away that it's that

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person. I absolutely had no idea until looking

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back. Okay. We're going to play it again on Miranda's

00:05:10.939 --> 00:05:12.040
request. Okay, that's really difficult for me

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to do, so I will do my best if you ask me to.

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Okay, ready? You know, people like you are the

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reason I was afraid to go to school as a child.

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Okay, so this is a character that has been, to

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help you guess the film, the character who's

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talking has been portrayed by two separate actresses

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in multiple versions of this film. Correct. The

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colour blue. Yeah, they are completely blue.

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And a bit orange. They're ginger. Yeah, their

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hair's like red or ginger and they are completely

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blue. Naked. No, no. Covered in bumps. You really

00:05:51.689 --> 00:05:54.230
like this film. You really like a different character

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in the film. Came from the year 2000. Like Dr.

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Dre. Was that 2001, that album? Oh. It might

00:06:03.800 --> 00:06:05.579
have been 2001. Simon will let me know, I'm sure.

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It's Gary Jarrett. Gary Jarrett. Come on. People

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are waiting. No, I'm going to... Guys, get overruled.

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That is Mystique in X -Men. Mystique in X -Men.

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It's when she's on the plane. She's talking to

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Senator Kelly. She's on the aeroplane. The first

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Mystique. Okay, right. Next. You talk like a

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leader, but the strongest leads. Oh, my God.

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Right. You talk like a leader, but the strongest

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lead. So this was a film I hadn't seen, so I

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had to do some research to find this. He hasn't

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seen it. We've seen it. I really like it. Yes.

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There's two of them. As Diddy would call it,

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it's a thinking man sci -fi. Which I have definitely

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said in front of you before. Slow paced, very

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long. I was going to say, it's like Lord of the

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Rings. It's very long. Yeah, two of them. It's

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a remake. Lots of sand. worms june yeah there

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we go so that's that's jamis or jamis from yeah

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jamis from from june so the first of the remake

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tunes he's not in the second one spoilers for

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people who haven't seen june and want to know

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what happens with that character sorry tj i am

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balthazar blake And you are my apprentice. Come

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on. Such a recognisable voice. Never seen it.

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So that's Balthazar, Blake, funny enough. And

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the Sorcerer's Apprentice. And you can always

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tell who that actor is. You can't mistake it.

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Right, next one. Be grateful Black Bolt doesn't

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engage you in conversation. This strange is even

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more arrogant than ours. This strange is more

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arrogant than ours. Have you both seen this now?

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No, we haven't seen it, but the fact that the

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name of the character is in it. I just said his

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name. So it's the Multiverse of Madness, and

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that's Captain Carter. That was Captain Carter,

00:08:02.759 --> 00:08:03.980
who happened to be speaking. So it's in the alternate

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universe where they're all in charge and blah,

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blah, blah, and then you've got Black Bolt stood

00:08:08.980 --> 00:08:11.720
next to her. Yes, Black Bolt is stood next to

00:08:11.720 --> 00:08:14.480
her. They're not vampires. What the hell are

00:08:14.480 --> 00:08:19.019
they? Ooh, maybe they're Ninja Turtles. Come

00:08:19.019 --> 00:08:22.000
on, Miranda. If you don't get it, you're going

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to kick yourself for not getting that one. Again,

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this is one I've never seen, but it was such

00:08:27.759 --> 00:08:31.360
an easy thing. Google that one. Yeah, that's

00:08:31.360 --> 00:08:34.899
a TV series, and it's a vampire talking to another

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vampire. It was The Vampire Diaries, Miranda,

00:08:39.639 --> 00:08:41.100
yes. And that was Stefan, I believe. And that

00:08:41.100 --> 00:08:44.549
was Stefan, yeah. There's a lot of really great

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clips of that guy. He's really good in that show.

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He's really good in everything he's been in,

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I've noticed. Yes. I did use Pupo, and the show

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is crap. But he's good. He is good, especially

00:08:55.470 --> 00:08:57.889
when he's drunk. I found a clip that was basically

00:08:57.889 --> 00:09:00.570
just five minutes of him being drunk on The Vampire

00:09:00.570 --> 00:09:14.350
Diaries. Great. Next one. Right, I don't know

00:09:14.350 --> 00:09:17.490
if you've seen that. It's quite an older film

00:09:17.490 --> 00:09:23.809
now. Cracking film. It's the... Okay, so it's...

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Is it the sequel? Yes. It is the sequel, yes.

00:09:26.889 --> 00:09:30.090
So these are all characters who are in something

00:09:30.090 --> 00:09:32.710
else that we've been watching recently. So that

00:09:32.710 --> 00:09:34.850
last one, that's not what the connection is,

00:09:34.929 --> 00:09:39.830
that last one, who just spoke then... That character

00:09:39.830 --> 00:09:42.370
she's playing is part of a group of characters

00:09:42.370 --> 00:09:44.789
who are in another show that we're watching on

00:09:44.789 --> 00:09:50.250
Netflix. Day of the Week. That's the biggest

00:09:50.250 --> 00:09:52.450
bloody clue in the whole world. The show's named

00:09:52.450 --> 00:09:54.490
after a day of the week, which is the character's

00:09:54.490 --> 00:09:58.309
name. Wednesday. So that's the Addams Family

00:09:58.309 --> 00:10:00.330
Values, was that? Addams Family Values, that's

00:10:00.330 --> 00:10:03.309
Granny. That was Granny. Now then, I'm going

00:10:03.309 --> 00:10:05.850
to go through that again. It's from Rand's benefit.

00:10:07.080 --> 00:10:08.480
This is in the order I've got it written down.

00:10:08.600 --> 00:10:11.679
So The Vampire Diaries, Doctor Strange and the

00:10:11.679 --> 00:10:14.139
Multiverse, The Sorcerer's Apprentice. Yeah.

00:10:14.240 --> 00:10:18.740
Oh, I've just clicked something. X -Men, Dune

00:10:18.740 --> 00:10:21.379
and Adam's Family Values. They are all connected.

00:10:21.960 --> 00:10:25.159
So I was going down the route of Strange New

00:10:25.159 --> 00:10:27.100
Worlds, which obviously gets thrown out as soon

00:10:27.100 --> 00:10:29.679
as you've got kind of Nick Cage speaking. And

00:10:29.679 --> 00:10:31.559
as soon as you go to the Captain Carter, because

00:10:31.559 --> 00:10:33.460
again, Hayley Atwell, who played Captain Carter,

00:10:33.460 --> 00:10:35.679
is not in Strange New Worlds. But then you do

00:10:35.679 --> 00:10:38.580
a bit more digging. And for example, so Mystique,

00:10:38.620 --> 00:10:41.919
Una from Strange New Worlds. Yep. Go a bit slower

00:10:41.919 --> 00:10:44.980
so Brandon can, yeah. June, James, Dr. Mbenga.

00:10:45.200 --> 00:10:47.600
His voice is so recognisable, by the way. Now

00:10:47.600 --> 00:10:49.679
you know his voice, you're not going to miss

00:10:49.679 --> 00:10:53.679
that one. Vampire Diaries, Stefan. Yep. James

00:10:53.679 --> 00:10:57.620
T. Kirk. Yep. Granny, the one you don't like

00:10:57.620 --> 00:10:59.820
anymore, Pellier or whatever name is. Played

00:10:59.820 --> 00:11:02.240
by Carol Kane. Now this is where I then spent

00:11:02.240 --> 00:11:05.450
ages trying to go back on this. It's who he's

00:11:05.450 --> 00:11:08.909
talking to, isn't it? It is. Which is Spock.

00:11:09.269 --> 00:11:12.529
Yep. And then Captain Carter is stood next to

00:11:12.529 --> 00:11:16.269
Black Bolt, who I had no idea was Captain Pike.

00:11:16.330 --> 00:11:18.169
Was Captain Pike. So actually, in the source

00:11:18.169 --> 00:11:20.610
print, I don't think he is talking to Ethan Peck.

00:11:20.809 --> 00:11:22.889
I don't think the kid in the source print is

00:11:22.889 --> 00:11:25.750
Ethan Peck. I couldn't... I just saw him, because

00:11:25.750 --> 00:11:28.330
I tried to get them to be... That's the connection

00:11:28.330 --> 00:11:31.669
is, they're all actors who are the main cast

00:11:31.669 --> 00:11:34.019
and crew of... of strange new worlds yeah their

00:11:34.019 --> 00:11:37.100
main yeah they're not he was the hardest one

00:11:37.100 --> 00:11:41.039
because i i i specifically did want to go sci

00:11:41.039 --> 00:11:43.200
-fi fantasy realm and the sorcerer's prince was

00:11:43.200 --> 00:11:45.620
one of the only one of the only ones that he'd

00:11:45.620 --> 00:11:48.779
been in that was even recognizable to me but

00:11:48.779 --> 00:11:51.799
he must be an extra in it because he wasn't top

00:11:51.799 --> 00:11:55.220
build on the cast that i could see on imdb Oh,

00:11:55.220 --> 00:11:57.320
right. Because he's not the actual Sorcerer's

00:11:57.320 --> 00:11:58.980
Apprentice. That's another guy who's a really

00:11:58.980 --> 00:12:00.980
annoying actor. Sorry, if you ever listened to

00:12:00.980 --> 00:12:03.120
whatever your name is. Oh, Jay Barrasher. Yeah,

00:12:03.120 --> 00:12:06.179
so Ethan Peck plays somebody called Andre. I

00:12:06.179 --> 00:12:09.120
don't know who that is. It could be like police

00:12:09.120 --> 00:12:11.740
officer number three for all I know. Yeah, the

00:12:11.740 --> 00:12:14.039
fact that he's quite a long way away while you're

00:12:14.039 --> 00:12:16.100
scrolling through the IMDB list kind of gives

00:12:16.100 --> 00:12:18.600
you an idea. There are a couple of pictures of

00:12:18.600 --> 00:12:21.779
him in it, but you're right. In fact, the very

00:12:21.779 --> 00:12:24.580
first image on there is... Not him, actually,

00:12:24.679 --> 00:12:31.240
so ignore me. But that's it. So, well done, everybody.

00:12:31.539 --> 00:12:33.600
I'm doing the same again. There's another, there'll

00:12:33.600 --> 00:12:38.080
be a connection for this week's one. You would

00:12:38.080 --> 00:12:39.700
have, everyone would have heard it already. So,

00:12:39.740 --> 00:12:43.860
well done to James, the Jimbo8e6 .bluesky .social,

00:12:44.080 --> 00:12:49.159
Super8az, Studio Channel 84. He got all of them

00:12:49.159 --> 00:12:51.860
right, except the connection. And what was his

00:12:51.860 --> 00:12:53.460
connection? Shall I tell you what he had his

00:12:53.460 --> 00:12:55.059
connection as? Let's have his connection. He

00:12:55.059 --> 00:12:57.960
texted me. What's happened? What's happened?

00:12:58.100 --> 00:13:00.100
We need to do bacon numbers at some point for

00:13:00.100 --> 00:13:05.159
these people as well. Right. I'm going to pause

00:13:05.159 --> 00:13:07.039
it while I actually find the text message. Where's

00:13:07.039 --> 00:13:10.120
the pause button? And as if by magic, we're off

00:13:10.120 --> 00:13:14.019
of pause. So he's right here. After getting it

00:13:14.019 --> 00:13:15.799
wrong, he then said, well, is it that they're

00:13:15.799 --> 00:13:17.960
all originally literature -based stories? X -Men

00:13:17.960 --> 00:13:20.340
and Multiverse are Marvel comics. Adam's Family

00:13:20.340 --> 00:13:22.120
was originally a comic series and newspaper.

00:13:22.799 --> 00:13:24.740
Vampire Diaries and Dune were novels and The

00:13:24.740 --> 00:13:26.759
Sorcerer's Apprentice was a fucking poem from

00:13:26.759 --> 00:13:30.370
the 1797. He Googled that, obviously. So well

00:13:30.370 --> 00:13:32.470
done for that. I think he deserves that as a

00:13:32.470 --> 00:13:34.230
connection because it's not even one he went

00:13:34.230 --> 00:13:35.789
for. It was a connection, but it wasn't the right

00:13:35.789 --> 00:13:37.809
connection. So he wouldn't have got his name

00:13:37.809 --> 00:13:39.409
read out if he'd got all the other ones wrong.

00:13:39.570 --> 00:13:42.409
But yeah, he gets to go into the winner's lounge.

00:13:42.470 --> 00:13:43.870
He gets a cup of tea and a chocolate biscuit.

00:13:44.070 --> 00:13:51.690
Well done, James. Ooh la la. Ah, right. Alone

00:13:51.690 --> 00:13:56.490
at last. I thought it would never come. I did.

00:13:56.769 --> 00:14:02.029
Oh, gross. What have you been doing? Not much

00:14:02.029 --> 00:14:03.710
sci -fi. I've caught up a little bit on Alien

00:14:03.710 --> 00:14:06.990
Earth. So I've watched the next two episodes

00:14:06.990 --> 00:14:10.529
afterwards. So I've got to the point that...

00:14:11.240 --> 00:14:14.659
morrow is still talking to the young man in his

00:14:14.659 --> 00:14:17.259
head and he ends up looking at hermit through

00:14:17.259 --> 00:14:19.980
the window thinking i'm going to choose you a

00:14:19.980 --> 00:14:23.139
bit like the old lottery it's you it's you um

00:14:23.139 --> 00:14:26.970
so we got through that episode quite a strong

00:14:26.970 --> 00:14:29.129
episode that one actually really really good

00:14:29.129 --> 00:14:30.850
seeing the building of everyone and you've got

00:14:30.850 --> 00:14:32.929
the other young lad that that's i want a proper

00:14:32.929 --> 00:14:35.990
name so i want to be called i and it's brilliant

00:14:35.990 --> 00:14:37.990
seeing that is that what he calls yeah he calls

00:14:37.990 --> 00:14:40.250
himself eyes wants to be called isaac as in isaac

00:14:40.250 --> 00:14:43.210
newton and everything else uh we get the idea

00:14:43.210 --> 00:14:47.629
that ginge is really losing it i'm pregnant are

00:14:47.629 --> 00:14:50.769
you okay yeah this is a little bit traumatized

00:14:50.769 --> 00:14:53.669
this is right isn't it um so we've got all of

00:14:53.669 --> 00:14:56.919
that then we go into the next episode which Honestly,

00:14:56.919 --> 00:14:59.039
if that's the future of space travel and that's

00:14:59.039 --> 00:15:01.019
the quality of the staff that people are being

00:15:01.019 --> 00:15:03.899
put on spaceships, they deserve to crash into

00:15:03.899 --> 00:15:06.100
Earth. Oh, that's the episode where it basically

00:15:06.100 --> 00:15:08.600
does the flashback. It's purely the whole spaceship

00:15:08.600 --> 00:15:12.279
episode. And they're such a shit crew. Oh, they

00:15:12.279 --> 00:15:16.789
look dickheads to each other too. commander's

00:15:16.789 --> 00:15:19.789
banging one of them, Tang or whatever his name

00:15:19.789 --> 00:15:22.289
is, is bashing one out over a freezing tube.

00:15:22.549 --> 00:15:25.330
It's pretty rancid. Well, it certainly humanised

00:15:25.330 --> 00:15:29.149
it, but I think it does kind of fit because you

00:15:29.149 --> 00:15:31.950
think all these people that these companies have

00:15:31.950 --> 00:15:34.789
are like the lifers who owe money or whatever

00:15:34.789 --> 00:15:36.830
and get locked into like 20 -year contracts.

00:15:36.929 --> 00:15:38.509
But that's the thing, actually. That's the one

00:15:38.509 --> 00:15:41.289
really good thing I'll tell you. Don't get me

00:15:41.289 --> 00:15:45.889
wrong, it wasn't a bad episode. It just... overly

00:15:45.889 --> 00:15:48.009
showed the frailty of the human race and the

00:15:48.009 --> 00:15:51.169
human condition when it's so few people in deep

00:15:51.169 --> 00:15:55.610
space um the thing i really liked from it though

00:15:55.610 --> 00:16:00.230
is before malachite dies basically the older

00:16:00.230 --> 00:16:03.980
engineers saying why would I buy something nice

00:16:03.980 --> 00:16:06.720
for my wife? I left her when she was 31 for this

00:16:06.720 --> 00:16:09.539
job. Yeah. Yeah. That was 65 years ago. She now

00:16:09.539 --> 00:16:12.039
looks like my grandmother. Yeah. That's why we

00:16:12.039 --> 00:16:14.840
get paid what we do. And that's like, that's

00:16:14.840 --> 00:16:16.820
why when the next mission comes up, it's like,

00:16:16.899 --> 00:16:19.679
yeah, pick me, pick me. You have abandoned everything.

00:16:19.779 --> 00:16:21.679
It's horrible thought, isn't it? That actually,

00:16:21.759 --> 00:16:24.159
yeah, I'm going to do this job. I'm not going

00:16:24.159 --> 00:16:27.620
to be back for 65 odd years. you're leaving everything

00:16:27.620 --> 00:16:31.419
behind what is it i've been watching the bobby

00:16:31.419 --> 00:16:34.720
verse i've been it talks a lot about like relative

00:16:34.720 --> 00:16:38.019
time to act to you you know how your time is

00:16:38.019 --> 00:16:40.139
different than earth's when you're traveling

00:16:40.139 --> 00:16:43.919
through space so yeah so for the and plus as

00:16:43.919 --> 00:16:45.360
well he get you know those people are getting

00:16:45.360 --> 00:16:48.639
put to sleep for 10 years or whatever travel

00:16:48.639 --> 00:16:51.700
time and then their relative time is different

00:16:51.700 --> 00:16:54.200
from earth anyway so for them yeah it might have

00:16:54.200 --> 00:16:57.340
been 20 years, but yet 60 years on Earth. So

00:16:57.340 --> 00:16:58.960
they're not coming back to anything. No, and

00:16:58.960 --> 00:17:00.659
it's interesting, actually, that they've started

00:17:00.659 --> 00:17:03.320
to kind of experiment in exploring that idea

00:17:03.320 --> 00:17:06.339
more. Yeah. Because we get it in alien Romulus

00:17:06.339 --> 00:17:08.059
as well. Time dilation? That's not time dilation,

00:17:08.079 --> 00:17:11.700
is it? It's called something. Yeah. It's Einstein's

00:17:11.700 --> 00:17:14.160
thought that the further you move away from Earth

00:17:14.160 --> 00:17:17.420
and the faster you go, the slower time. Your

00:17:17.420 --> 00:17:21.660
time is relatively slower. Theory of relativity.

00:17:22.380 --> 00:17:25.279
that's in theory what it is i think but yeah

00:17:25.279 --> 00:17:28.420
so in alien aliens alien 3 alien resurrection

00:17:28.420 --> 00:17:31.319
you don't get any you get yeah oh well yeah we

00:17:31.319 --> 00:17:33.500
deep freeze each other and we travel you don't

00:17:33.500 --> 00:17:36.140
really talk about all of that until you get really

00:17:36.140 --> 00:17:37.980
into aliens when it's like well yeah you've been

00:17:37.980 --> 00:17:41.240
frozen for x number of years it's now quite far

00:17:41.240 --> 00:17:43.640
in the future blah blah blah but they still don't

00:17:43.640 --> 00:17:45.480
really dig into that whereas then when you come

00:17:45.480 --> 00:17:48.740
along to romulus and whatever you say about rom

00:17:48.740 --> 00:17:51.500
i enjoyed it i didn't mind it as a film i thought

00:17:51.500 --> 00:17:54.420
it was a Good addition to it. Better than Resurrection.

00:17:56.099 --> 00:17:58.079
Better than quite a lot of the stuff. Is Romulus

00:17:58.079 --> 00:18:00.160
the most recent alien film? That's the most recent

00:18:00.160 --> 00:18:02.259
one. Oh, no, that's great. I liked it. And what

00:18:02.259 --> 00:18:04.799
I really liked, and what Alien Earth is kind

00:18:04.799 --> 00:18:07.880
of hammering home as well, is Yatani's just a

00:18:07.880 --> 00:18:10.680
bastard of a company. Well, they're all bastards.

00:18:10.680 --> 00:18:12.480
So Romulus, they're stuck on this planet. She

00:18:12.480 --> 00:18:15.220
can't get away from that planet. And the contract

00:18:15.220 --> 00:18:17.480
just keeps getting extended and extended. And

00:18:17.480 --> 00:18:19.160
you get the idea again, these people on this

00:18:19.160 --> 00:18:23.079
ship. we get stuck on this job we lose all our

00:18:23.079 --> 00:18:25.700
family so then we're begging basically the company

00:18:25.700 --> 00:18:27.740
just to keep sending us on these things and it

00:18:27.740 --> 00:18:29.279
kind of feels like you're not begging you just

00:18:29.279 --> 00:18:32.059
you don't really have a choice do you yeah so

00:18:32.059 --> 00:18:35.960
actually it really highlights how horrible the

00:18:35.960 --> 00:18:39.460
company is yeah yeah um so no i really enjoyed

00:18:39.460 --> 00:18:41.000
that and then we got through that episode and

00:18:41.000 --> 00:18:44.220
then i kind of ran out of time um I finished

00:18:44.220 --> 00:18:46.339
them, so you can talk as much as you want. Well,

00:18:46.380 --> 00:18:49.000
no, so that's that. And then the only other sci

00:18:49.000 --> 00:18:51.880
-fi I've done, I went back and I thought, I'm

00:18:51.880 --> 00:18:53.279
going to start watching the Star Trek films from

00:18:53.279 --> 00:18:55.700
the beginning again. Because you like torturing

00:18:55.700 --> 00:18:58.319
yourself. No, I enjoy going through them once

00:18:58.319 --> 00:19:00.539
in a while. And I was out with a motion picture,

00:19:00.779 --> 00:19:05.960
and I think in recent years, it's generally accepted

00:19:05.960 --> 00:19:08.920
it wasn't as bad a movie as people used to make

00:19:08.920 --> 00:19:11.119
out. Now, the problem with the motion picture

00:19:11.119 --> 00:19:14.359
is... A, it's the first film. So really, they

00:19:14.359 --> 00:19:16.000
didn't know what they're going to do. What are

00:19:16.000 --> 00:19:17.759
we going to do? It's before the next generation

00:19:17.759 --> 00:19:20.579
was even kind of existed. And in fact, you can

00:19:20.579 --> 00:19:22.279
see some of the sets that they then used for

00:19:22.279 --> 00:19:26.099
the next generation in it. But it's the first

00:19:26.099 --> 00:19:27.799
thing they've done since the original series.

00:19:28.339 --> 00:19:30.420
How do we make this into a film? And you can

00:19:30.420 --> 00:19:33.220
see that, yes, they had some good ideas, some

00:19:33.220 --> 00:19:35.240
bad ideas. And that's what the problem is with

00:19:35.240 --> 00:19:37.920
the motion picture. As much as I enjoy it, it's

00:19:37.920 --> 00:19:42.119
paced so weirdly. So I watched this. oh i can't

00:19:42.119 --> 00:19:44.539
believe 20 minutes has already gone by only like

00:19:44.539 --> 00:19:49.079
an hour and 55 minutes left of this film then

00:19:49.079 --> 00:19:51.319
literally it got to half an hour i can't believe

00:19:51.319 --> 00:19:53.759
only half an hour has gone by but then it suddenly

00:19:53.759 --> 00:19:55.819
speeds up again then it slows down it's just

00:19:55.819 --> 00:19:59.019
a really badly paced film the story itself is

00:19:59.019 --> 00:20:02.109
is pretty good and the remastering of it It's

00:20:02.109 --> 00:20:06.230
really good on 4K. I saw it at the cinema. Was

00:20:06.230 --> 00:20:08.190
it last year it must have been or a couple of

00:20:08.190 --> 00:20:11.009
years ago? And it was fantastic. And seeing V

00:20:11.009 --> 00:20:14.049
'ger or Voyager in its complete kind of design

00:20:14.049 --> 00:20:17.329
that they wanted you to see was very cool as

00:20:17.329 --> 00:20:20.390
well. So I'm just kind of halfway through that

00:20:20.390 --> 00:20:22.730
at the moment. And that's kind of it on the science

00:20:22.730 --> 00:20:24.309
fiction. You're not finished Strange New Worlds

00:20:24.309 --> 00:20:27.480
yet? No, not because I'm bored of it. I just

00:20:27.480 --> 00:20:29.900
wanted to kind of get onto alien Earth. Yeah.

00:20:30.019 --> 00:20:32.380
And then I just wanted to be away from everything

00:20:32.380 --> 00:20:35.220
kind of odd and wanted just to complicate my

00:20:35.220 --> 00:20:38.160
life a little bit more, really. And just start

00:20:38.160 --> 00:20:41.599
something else as well. Basically, it's a Trekkies

00:20:41.599 --> 00:20:44.619
version, Trek fans version of self -flagellation

00:20:44.619 --> 00:20:47.240
is watching all the Star Trek films again. Bus

00:20:47.240 --> 00:20:51.690
driver's holiday. So that's kind of all I've

00:20:51.690 --> 00:20:53.569
done. I've not even had any gaming time. I mean,

00:20:53.589 --> 00:20:55.150
I've ordered something very cool from the TikTok

00:20:55.150 --> 00:20:58.849
shop, if it turns up and is valid. But allegedly

00:20:58.849 --> 00:21:03.049
the TikTok shop seller is the company that manufactures

00:21:03.049 --> 00:21:07.230
it. It looks like an Xbox Elite controller made

00:21:07.230 --> 00:21:11.650
by a Chinese company, but it's designed for Windows,

00:21:11.849 --> 00:21:14.930
iOS, Android. It's got a little screen on it.

00:21:15.240 --> 00:21:16.779
that you can program the colors of the whole

00:21:16.779 --> 00:21:18.740
controller for it. And you can say, no, I'm connecting

00:21:18.740 --> 00:21:21.019
to a PC. I want you to connect via Bluetooth,

00:21:21.099 --> 00:21:22.880
or I want to connect via the included dongle

00:21:22.880 --> 00:21:25.380
and it's switch compatible and all of that. And

00:21:25.380 --> 00:21:29.140
this is like, this is going to be ideal. And

00:21:29.140 --> 00:21:31.299
I mean, it's normally retails for 80 quid on

00:21:31.299 --> 00:21:33.680
Amazon. TikTok shop was doing it for 35 direct

00:21:33.680 --> 00:21:36.720
from the reseller. So we'll see what turns up,

00:21:36.720 --> 00:21:38.619
but if it does turn up, I'm going to be ideal

00:21:38.619 --> 00:21:42.440
for the razor, not the razor, the Legion, because

00:21:42.440 --> 00:21:46.390
that really pisses me off. I love my Legion Go.

00:21:46.549 --> 00:21:50.109
It's Windows. It's running Microsoft. I cannot

00:21:50.109 --> 00:21:53.509
pair an Xbox controller to it and have it work.

00:21:53.750 --> 00:21:57.190
So you can pair it, but you don't get all the

00:21:57.190 --> 00:22:00.329
controls properly because the Xbox controllers

00:22:00.329 --> 00:22:02.670
to work with Windows, you need the specific Microsoft

00:22:02.670 --> 00:22:06.829
dongle to make it work properly. That sucks.

00:22:07.109 --> 00:22:10.190
It's really shit. Really shit. So that's on order.

00:22:11.150 --> 00:22:18.240
Otherwise, that's it, I'm afraid, darling. What

00:22:18.240 --> 00:22:23.079
have you been up to? A few things, a few things.

00:22:23.279 --> 00:22:26.839
So I have been playing a few games. Have you

00:22:26.839 --> 00:22:30.440
finished the storm building fixing of the building

00:22:30.440 --> 00:22:32.220
site that you were working on last time? No,

00:22:32.220 --> 00:22:33.940
I gave that a little bit of a break because I

00:22:33.940 --> 00:22:35.980
just fancied something a bit different than just

00:22:35.980 --> 00:22:37.720
driving those things around. I've still got to

00:22:37.720 --> 00:22:39.500
go back and play it. That's probably going to

00:22:39.500 --> 00:22:41.960
be one that I'll go and jump in and out of because

00:22:41.960 --> 00:22:43.559
it's not like you can forget the buttons. The

00:22:43.559 --> 00:22:45.519
buttons are always on the screen. True. Driving

00:22:45.519 --> 00:22:50.400
a car is always the right trigger. And a lot

00:22:50.400 --> 00:22:53.359
of my gaming has been a bit shorter time spaces.

00:22:53.599 --> 00:22:55.440
You need to kind of block a bit more time out

00:22:55.440 --> 00:22:56.460
for that if you want to actually get anything

00:22:56.460 --> 00:22:58.700
done because it takes so long to get from one

00:22:58.700 --> 00:23:01.279
side of the map to the other. Yes, it's not one

00:23:01.279 --> 00:23:02.960
that you can just pick up and do a 15 -minute

00:23:02.960 --> 00:23:05.880
blast here because by that point you've got to

00:23:05.880 --> 00:23:07.259
where you need to be and then you're turning

00:23:07.259 --> 00:23:11.180
it off. Yeah, exactly. So a long time ago I kick

00:23:11.180 --> 00:23:15.029
-started Yooka -Laylee. Have you heard of that

00:23:15.029 --> 00:23:19.650
game? No. So the very team that made Banjo -Kazooie...

00:23:19.650 --> 00:23:21.650
Oh, sorry, Yooka -Laylee. Yes, okay, yeah, yeah,

00:23:21.650 --> 00:23:23.769
yeah. Yes, the very team that made Banjo -Kazooie,

00:23:23.829 --> 00:23:27.069
one of my favourite games of all time, did a

00:23:27.069 --> 00:23:29.509
Kickstarter many, many moons ago for a game called

00:23:29.509 --> 00:23:32.589
Yooka -Laylee. Yeah, fun fact, JonTron was meant

00:23:32.589 --> 00:23:34.349
to do a voice for it, then he aired a political

00:23:34.349 --> 00:23:36.450
opinion and his voice was deleted and replaced.

00:23:36.529 --> 00:23:39.109
I have heard that, yeah. Was he going to be Trouser

00:23:39.109 --> 00:23:42.359
Snake? I don't know anything more than that.

00:23:42.359 --> 00:23:44.160
I mean, the voices are like Banjo -Kazooie. It's

00:23:44.160 --> 00:23:50.460
just... Anyway. And I've got to say, didn't actually

00:23:50.460 --> 00:23:53.160
like the first iteration of it. The controls

00:23:53.160 --> 00:23:57.160
were awful. The camera was awful. And it wasn't

00:23:57.160 --> 00:24:00.019
awful in like, oh, they've gone retro. I think

00:24:00.019 --> 00:24:01.799
that they actually just did a bad job of it.

00:24:01.859 --> 00:24:03.019
And I'm sorry to say, I just think they did a

00:24:03.019 --> 00:24:04.920
bad job. So I couldn't play it. Barely played

00:24:04.920 --> 00:24:06.920
that much of it. And I was a kickstarter of it.

00:24:07.440 --> 00:24:10.019
And then I came back to it years later. I came

00:24:10.019 --> 00:24:12.180
back to it and I was like, they'd done some updates

00:24:12.180 --> 00:24:14.819
to it and camera control and normal movement

00:24:14.819 --> 00:24:17.579
control was all things that they addressed and

00:24:17.579 --> 00:24:19.019
updated. I was like, oh, this feels really nice

00:24:19.019 --> 00:24:21.440
now. And I paid for a bit and then I can't remember

00:24:21.440 --> 00:24:23.480
why. I think something I'd been waiting for came

00:24:23.480 --> 00:24:27.579
out. Anyway, they've kind of done a, they've

00:24:27.579 --> 00:24:30.319
done an actual remake of it now. So it's not

00:24:30.319 --> 00:24:32.259
like a remaster to bring it up today. They've

00:24:32.259 --> 00:24:35.759
actually rebuilt a lot of it, completely changed.

00:24:36.250 --> 00:24:39.150
the control schemes and how you control the characters

00:24:39.150 --> 00:24:41.130
seems to be a thing at the moment isn't it so

00:24:41.130 --> 00:24:43.970
we've got tomb raider we've got dark forces yeah

00:24:43.970 --> 00:24:48.069
we've had spyro yeah but they've croc they've

00:24:48.069 --> 00:24:52.769
also added shed loads more stuff and then a demo

00:24:52.769 --> 00:24:55.250
was out so because i was quite i was actually

00:24:55.250 --> 00:24:56.970
kind of interesting because i kick -started it

00:24:56.970 --> 00:24:58.849
i get a discount anyway when it does come out

00:24:59.420 --> 00:25:01.119
But I can't remember what console I brought it

00:25:01.119 --> 00:25:03.480
on. I have to specifically buy it on the console.

00:25:03.539 --> 00:25:06.000
I don't remember which one. You must still buy

00:25:06.000 --> 00:25:09.059
it on the 360. Yeah. No, it wasn't on the 360.

00:25:09.099 --> 00:25:13.980
It was Xbox or PS4, I think, and PC. I might

00:25:13.980 --> 00:25:15.440
have on the PC, which I won't be getting on the

00:25:15.440 --> 00:25:17.440
PC again. I'll get it on the Xbox. Anyway, enough

00:25:17.440 --> 00:25:21.410
of that. So the graphics to me look the same.

00:25:21.970 --> 00:25:24.089
I can't really tell. It's one of those cartoon

00:25:24.089 --> 00:25:26.789
games. They always look good forever. It's not

00:25:26.789 --> 00:25:28.450
really ever going to go out of style, that kind

00:25:28.450 --> 00:25:31.009
of cartoon game. Like cell shading has always

00:25:31.009 --> 00:25:33.049
looked good. I was going to say exactly that.

00:25:33.430 --> 00:25:35.690
Proof of that, Jet Set Radio. Yeah, Jet Set Radio

00:25:35.690 --> 00:25:38.630
or the Game 13, I think it's called. It's like

00:25:38.630 --> 00:25:42.210
an FBA. It looks amazing now. And yeah, there

00:25:42.210 --> 00:25:44.369
was a demo out. So they've added loads of levels,

00:25:44.450 --> 00:25:47.630
loads more. If you're familiar with Banjo -Kazooie,

00:25:47.710 --> 00:25:50.670
you go around and you collect notes and you collect

00:25:50.670 --> 00:25:52.789
jigsaw pieces. This you collect pages, called

00:25:52.789 --> 00:25:55.549
pages. They've added more of those, more bosses,

00:25:55.650 --> 00:25:57.009
loads of stuff. So I was like, actually, you

00:25:57.009 --> 00:26:00.470
know what? I might get this and actually play

00:26:00.470 --> 00:26:03.470
this. Because it's only like 20 quid or something.

00:26:03.529 --> 00:26:05.970
Funnily enough, 13 was another one they remastered

00:26:05.970 --> 00:26:07.730
or remade. Oh, did they? Yeah, there was a remake

00:26:07.730 --> 00:26:10.849
of that semi -recently. And talking of remakes

00:26:10.849 --> 00:26:13.650
that are coming, did you ever play a game called

00:26:13.650 --> 00:26:16.279
Blood? No, I don't think I've heard of it. It

00:26:16.279 --> 00:26:18.839
used the incredibly famous first -person shooter

00:26:18.839 --> 00:26:21.519
engine called Build that was used for Duke Nukem

00:26:21.519 --> 00:26:26.359
3D. Okay. And it's one of my... To be fair, I

00:26:26.359 --> 00:26:28.799
think I probably played more Blood than I played

00:26:28.799 --> 00:26:32.039
Duke 3D. It's finally coming to consoles. I'm

00:26:32.039 --> 00:26:35.259
going to look it up. Blood. It was... I have

00:26:35.259 --> 00:26:36.519
to write blood game because it just came out

00:26:36.519 --> 00:26:40.039
of blood pressure. Yeah. Oh, it looks like Doom.

00:26:40.359 --> 00:26:42.680
Yeah, well, it was Duke 3D. It used the same

00:26:42.680 --> 00:26:45.000
graphic engine as... And I spent... I tell you,

00:26:45.000 --> 00:26:48.720
my youth was basically building. It came with

00:26:48.720 --> 00:26:51.460
a... decent map editor so i know duke 3d came

00:26:51.460 --> 00:26:53.900
with map editor but the one that came with blood

00:26:53.900 --> 00:26:56.059
was even easier to use so you could build your

00:26:56.059 --> 00:26:58.559
own maps and play them it was amazing i'm not

00:26:58.559 --> 00:27:01.440
sure i even recognize it so like the title image

00:27:01.440 --> 00:27:03.599
is a black solid black background it says blood

00:27:03.599 --> 00:27:04.940
which looks like it's made of blood and then

00:27:04.940 --> 00:27:08.099
a bloody handprint yeah so the original one would

00:27:08.099 --> 00:27:10.140
have been a what would have looked like a gray

00:27:10.140 --> 00:27:14.980
long gravestone that said blood and a weird kind

00:27:14.980 --> 00:27:18.730
of bat creature Oh, yeah, there it is. Big wings,

00:27:18.809 --> 00:27:21.630
yeah, kind of coming over the top. Yeah, there

00:27:21.630 --> 00:27:23.890
you go. Yeah, no, I don't recognise this at all.

00:27:24.269 --> 00:27:26.710
I mean, it looks just like Doom. It's clearly

00:27:26.710 --> 00:27:30.869
a Doom kind of... Probably a Doom engine, probably.

00:27:31.170 --> 00:27:33.390
Well, no, it's the Build engine from Duke 3D.

00:27:33.410 --> 00:27:34.470
Oh, Build engine. Oh, right, sorry. So, yeah,

00:27:34.569 --> 00:27:37.529
it's a Doom clone using Build instead, but obviously

00:27:37.529 --> 00:27:39.170
it was more advanced than Doom at that point.

00:27:39.329 --> 00:27:41.190
I mean, there's just wonderful things. One of

00:27:41.190 --> 00:27:44.319
the weapons is a flare gun. So you fire it at

00:27:44.319 --> 00:27:46.000
them and they keep walking towards you and then

00:27:46.000 --> 00:27:48.740
just suddenly explode into flames. I like that.

00:27:49.579 --> 00:27:52.980
So you can replay. I played the demo. Yeah. Finished

00:27:52.980 --> 00:27:55.980
the demo. And then that basically was the tutorial.

00:27:56.119 --> 00:27:58.980
And the tutorial for the new game is completely

00:27:58.980 --> 00:28:01.059
different than the tutorial for the original

00:28:01.059 --> 00:28:02.700
version of it. So they have definitely just that

00:28:02.700 --> 00:28:05.480
little bit alone. Anyway, I also played a game

00:28:05.480 --> 00:28:08.730
called Megabonk. Which I recommend you actually

00:28:08.730 --> 00:28:12.789
play on Steam. Okay. So it's like £7, maybe a

00:28:12.789 --> 00:28:15.690
bit more on Steam. It's filling you out. One

00:28:15.690 --> 00:28:17.809
guy developing it is one of those. Now, have

00:28:17.809 --> 00:28:21.009
you ever played Vampire Survivors? No. So in

00:28:21.009 --> 00:28:23.210
Vampire Survivors, you play a little guy. It's

00:28:23.210 --> 00:28:25.210
top -down. And you just have hordes of enemies

00:28:25.210 --> 00:28:27.109
coming at you constantly. And when you kill an

00:28:27.109 --> 00:28:29.190
enemy, it drops a gem. Gem gives you experience.

00:28:29.349 --> 00:28:33.069
When you level up, you can then spend it on a

00:28:33.069 --> 00:28:35.309
random one of three things that got offered to

00:28:35.309 --> 00:28:39.000
you more. damage a new weapon, upgrade for a

00:28:39.000 --> 00:28:40.380
weapon you've already got. It's that kind of

00:28:40.380 --> 00:28:43.180
game. I don't know what they're called. A survival

00:28:43.180 --> 00:28:47.779
roguelike game, I suppose. Anyway, Megabonk is

00:28:47.779 --> 00:28:50.480
a... It's a roguelike survival game. Okay, it's

00:28:50.480 --> 00:28:54.839
a 3D -ish version of that. Yeah, okay. Now, it's

00:28:54.839 --> 00:28:57.339
clearly got to be in some kind of alpha form

00:28:57.339 --> 00:29:00.619
at the moment. It's really addictive, and I can't

00:29:00.619 --> 00:29:03.339
tell you why. I don't know. I'm enjoying playing

00:29:03.339 --> 00:29:06.680
it. It's quite fun, but I... don't i think it's

00:29:06.680 --> 00:29:11.660
very difficult like like a bit cruel in how difficult

00:29:11.660 --> 00:29:16.000
it is so early on um loads of things to unlock

00:29:16.000 --> 00:29:21.240
but i i don't like how the enemies literally

00:29:21.240 --> 00:29:25.839
will appear right in front of you or really close

00:29:25.839 --> 00:29:28.960
to you and they're so aggressive and how quick

00:29:28.960 --> 00:29:34.430
they move and also a lot of games like You can

00:29:34.430 --> 00:29:37.230
pass through enemies in a lot of games, which

00:29:37.230 --> 00:29:39.490
you can do in Vampires 5 is you can just pass

00:29:39.490 --> 00:29:41.029
through. Because when you're getting completely

00:29:41.029 --> 00:29:42.990
swarmed, you need the person to actually have

00:29:42.990 --> 00:29:45.190
a chance of getting out. In this, you can jump.

00:29:45.289 --> 00:29:47.369
The jump's pointless because you can't jump over

00:29:47.369 --> 00:29:50.039
fucking anything. And jump over the enemies that

00:29:50.039 --> 00:29:52.779
I can see. And you can't pass through enemies

00:29:52.779 --> 00:29:54.920
and enemies can't pass through each other. So

00:29:54.920 --> 00:29:57.500
very quickly, you can get instantly overwhelmed

00:29:57.500 --> 00:30:00.640
and be from 100 % health to zero instantly. Right.

00:30:00.740 --> 00:30:03.539
Because you're instantly swarmed by like 30 or

00:30:03.539 --> 00:30:06.240
40 people. You can't get out. You can't jump

00:30:06.240 --> 00:30:08.500
over anyone. Your weapons just aren't. Your weapons

00:30:08.500 --> 00:30:12.119
are good enough to kill things. But if you just

00:30:12.119 --> 00:30:15.700
have had a tiny little lapse of judgment and

00:30:15.700 --> 00:30:17.680
got yourself trapped, well, that's it, fucked.

00:30:18.719 --> 00:30:21.279
Game over, start again. And I actually found

00:30:21.279 --> 00:30:23.299
that a bit annoying about it. But I've played

00:30:23.299 --> 00:30:24.839
it every night for the last three nights for

00:30:24.839 --> 00:30:28.059
about 10 minutes. I am enjoying it because I

00:30:28.059 --> 00:30:31.539
do like those kind of games. There's another

00:30:31.539 --> 00:30:34.460
one, Deep Rock Galactic Survivor. That's a really

00:30:34.460 --> 00:30:35.900
good one that I've been playing recently. That's

00:30:35.900 --> 00:30:38.119
on Game Pass. You played Deep Rock Galactic before?

00:30:38.140 --> 00:30:40.059
Never even heard of it. Okay, so Deep Rock Galactic

00:30:40.059 --> 00:30:46.819
is a four -player cooperative. level mining things.

00:30:46.900 --> 00:30:50.420
You go down dwarves mining on this planet. You

00:30:50.420 --> 00:30:52.380
go down on dwarves. You go down on dwarves and

00:30:52.380 --> 00:30:55.859
you mine them. And then you slowly enter the...

00:30:55.859 --> 00:30:57.839
Yeah, so you all go together and you can have

00:30:57.839 --> 00:31:00.140
different... One guy's really good at mining

00:31:00.140 --> 00:31:01.880
and another guy's really good with a gun and

00:31:01.880 --> 00:31:04.140
can shoot these bugs that come at you, basically.

00:31:04.359 --> 00:31:07.099
And you've got to mine a lot of gems, take it

00:31:07.099 --> 00:31:09.559
to the end, and then go down another level and

00:31:09.559 --> 00:31:14.309
continue. That's what it is. Deep rock. Galactic

00:31:14.309 --> 00:31:16.269
Survivor is a top -down version about you on

00:31:16.269 --> 00:31:19.890
your own, like these other games. And you mine

00:31:19.890 --> 00:31:22.130
stuff. Swarms of enemies coming, you level them

00:31:22.130 --> 00:31:24.470
up. Rinse, repeat. Yeah, I'm into those kind

00:31:24.470 --> 00:31:26.049
of games at the moment. That's a very good one.

00:31:27.029 --> 00:31:29.849
Yeah, anyway, those are the three games I've

00:31:29.849 --> 00:31:32.910
been playing. And I've re -listened to the first

00:31:32.910 --> 00:31:34.710
three books of Bobby Verse. We spoke about it

00:31:34.710 --> 00:31:38.910
before. Von Neumann, Probe, Replicating Himself,

00:31:39.309 --> 00:31:43.059
Fighting Aliens. Finding New Species. Really,

00:31:43.059 --> 00:31:44.519
really, really, really, really, really good.

00:31:44.660 --> 00:31:46.920
If you like audiobooks and you like sci -fi,

00:31:47.079 --> 00:31:49.759
listen to Bobbyverse. There's five of them. Apparently

00:31:49.759 --> 00:31:52.599
he's writing a sixth one. Who knows? He doesn't

00:31:52.599 --> 00:31:54.099
know when he's going to finish it. You shouldn't

00:31:54.099 --> 00:31:56.619
rush people who do writing because they'll fucking

00:31:56.619 --> 00:31:59.200
wreck it if you rush them. Anyway, that's it.

00:31:59.680 --> 00:32:03.339
Right, so very quickly, I would like to do a

00:32:03.339 --> 00:32:05.700
stream with you at some point. I'm not talking

00:32:05.700 --> 00:32:07.299
about pissing together. That's exactly, we've

00:32:07.299 --> 00:32:08.359
got to cross our streams. No, no, no, it's not

00:32:08.359 --> 00:32:12.089
pee -pee. It's a game. I'd like us to do. Have

00:32:12.089 --> 00:32:14.789
you ever heard of the game from the olden days

00:32:14.789 --> 00:32:19.130
called the Oregon Trail? Yeah. So you went across

00:32:19.130 --> 00:32:22.930
the United States to get from A to B and try

00:32:22.930 --> 00:32:25.049
not to die from cholera. Yeah, I played it, yeah.

00:32:25.190 --> 00:32:28.289
Well, there's a modern version. Okay. That I

00:32:28.289 --> 00:32:30.690
own on my iPad that we can stream from. Okay,

00:32:30.730 --> 00:32:33.589
cool. Called the Organ Trail. The Organ Trail.

00:32:33.589 --> 00:32:36.650
And it's basically the Oregon Trail, your horse

00:32:36.650 --> 00:32:38.529
and cart's replaced with an old knackered estate

00:32:38.529 --> 00:32:42.380
wagon. Mm -hmm. And you are trying to get through

00:32:42.380 --> 00:32:46.579
a zombified America. Oh, cool. And it's very,

00:32:46.680 --> 00:32:49.660
very funny. It's very cool. And it's the sort

00:32:49.660 --> 00:32:51.299
of thing that we can spend half an hour just

00:32:51.299 --> 00:32:53.980
doing and then chatting away as we go. I had

00:32:53.980 --> 00:32:56.740
a load on Steam that I've got in a special folder

00:32:56.740 --> 00:32:58.619
for us to play that were meant to be Halloween

00:32:58.619 --> 00:33:02.039
games. Well, you'd also got, thank goodness you're

00:33:02.039 --> 00:33:05.009
here. Which you've never got room to play. Yeah,

00:33:05.029 --> 00:33:07.589
you know what we're like. It's just us two finding

00:33:07.589 --> 00:33:10.289
the time to play these games and stream, isn't

00:33:10.289 --> 00:33:14.109
it? Damn you children! Gosh, us being grown -ups

00:33:14.109 --> 00:33:18.069
and having to do things. Yeah. Well, that's it.

00:33:18.549 --> 00:33:27.529
Next. Accessing library computer data. Moontrap

00:33:27.529 --> 00:33:35.180
1989. 1989. What do you think? I love it because

00:33:35.180 --> 00:33:42.460
I just do. It's 1988 cheesy goodness. 89? 88.

00:33:43.119 --> 00:33:45.200
Oh, I thought INDB said it was 89. No, 1988.

00:33:46.160 --> 00:33:48.519
And it's a parental guidance that went on for

00:33:48.519 --> 00:33:50.920
one hour and 32 minutes. Maybe Google told me

00:33:50.920 --> 00:33:53.359
it was 89. But yeah, INDB, 89. It depends on

00:33:53.359 --> 00:33:54.920
when it was released and what country, I guess.

00:33:55.019 --> 00:33:59.819
But either way, I really like it. It's a very...

00:34:00.279 --> 00:34:03.299
It's not a good film by a long shot. Let's get

00:34:03.299 --> 00:34:09.059
that out there. It is a cult enjoyable film because

00:34:09.059 --> 00:34:14.179
of how it worked with its budget. It was low

00:34:14.179 --> 00:34:16.679
budget, really low budget if you hadn't guessed.

00:34:18.599 --> 00:34:21.880
The budget wasn't the issue I had with it. What

00:34:21.880 --> 00:34:24.980
did you have a problem with then? No, you keep

00:34:24.980 --> 00:34:27.639
talking and then we'll get on to what I think

00:34:27.639 --> 00:34:32.449
about it. I think the... The story of it is very

00:34:32.449 --> 00:34:34.449
simple, ladies and gents, if you didn't go and

00:34:34.449 --> 00:34:38.710
watch it. Commander Chekov, before he was in

00:34:38.710 --> 00:34:44.329
Starfleet, so Walter Thurning, got offered this

00:34:44.329 --> 00:34:46.869
film after the Star Trek films in 88, obviously.

00:34:47.449 --> 00:34:51.670
I believe if you read why he took the role, he

00:34:51.670 --> 00:34:55.239
needed an extension. He claims he was interested

00:34:55.239 --> 00:34:57.699
and thought it was an interesting way to go with

00:34:57.699 --> 00:35:00.260
sci -fi. His pool had a leak and the pool man

00:35:00.260 --> 00:35:02.000
gave him a quote that he just wasn't happy with

00:35:02.000 --> 00:35:06.619
so he had to go do this. Very, very probable

00:35:06.619 --> 00:35:11.460
at this point. So it revolves around Walter Koenig

00:35:11.460 --> 00:35:16.099
and Bruce Campbell. They are hotshot NASA astronauts.

00:35:16.719 --> 00:35:19.300
Bruce Campbell is Bruce Campbell in this. Bruce

00:35:19.300 --> 00:35:24.210
Campbell is Bruce Campbell everywhere. Something

00:35:24.210 --> 00:35:27.190
is picked up in space and brought back. That

00:35:27.190 --> 00:35:30.389
something turns into a giant fucking robot. They

00:35:30.389 --> 00:35:32.570
then decide to go for a little bit of a... Oh,

00:35:32.590 --> 00:35:34.869
no, sorry. It's Walter and Bruce Campbell just

00:35:34.869 --> 00:35:36.769
being little cowboys in space mucking about,

00:35:36.949 --> 00:35:38.630
to be honest, at the beginning. It's like, yeah,

00:35:38.769 --> 00:35:41.869
we don't have strict conditions to be astronauts.

00:35:42.090 --> 00:35:44.650
We can just be as we are, pick up this thing,

00:35:44.710 --> 00:35:47.070
take it back to Earth. Almost like it's like

00:35:47.070 --> 00:35:48.650
a day trip. It's like, oh, we need to take the

00:35:48.650 --> 00:35:51.030
old shuttle out again. Oh, yeah, there's the

00:35:51.030 --> 00:35:52.650
keys. Just make sure you put fuel in it when

00:35:52.650 --> 00:35:54.090
they bring it back. Don't leave it with the half

00:35:54.090 --> 00:35:56.050
a tank again. Yeah, I kind of got that vibe too,

00:35:56.190 --> 00:35:57.989
yeah. Yeah, the other shuttle was in the ocean

00:35:57.989 --> 00:35:59.889
because of Yukons. It didn't have enough petrol

00:35:59.889 --> 00:36:03.409
to get out there. Then they end up going back

00:36:03.409 --> 00:36:05.230
to find out where this came from. They land on

00:36:05.230 --> 00:36:07.110
the moon. They find a temple on the moon. Then

00:36:07.110 --> 00:36:10.869
a giant fucking spaceship appears. And they find

00:36:10.869 --> 00:36:14.320
a woman who... Rob will like this, ooh -la -pee

00:36:14.320 --> 00:36:17.219
-pee -poo -poo woman who just doesn't speak English

00:36:17.219 --> 00:36:20.880
and then they can't escape using an Uzi and then

00:36:20.880 --> 00:36:24.340
it's all over. And the very final scene is we

00:36:24.340 --> 00:36:28.719
see one of the alien robot pods in a junkyard,

00:36:28.760 --> 00:36:31.739
I guess is what you'd call it. That is the story.

00:36:31.860 --> 00:36:36.679
It's basically we find out that man has existed

00:36:36.679 --> 00:36:39.639
a lot longer and that there were aliens on the

00:36:39.639 --> 00:36:43.099
moon and blah, blah, blah. Mm -hmm. Go on, you

00:36:43.099 --> 00:36:45.420
hated it. I can tell you hated it. So just go

00:36:45.420 --> 00:36:48.059
on. Look, look, look. Hate is not the word I'd

00:36:48.059 --> 00:36:50.900
use for it. Did I enjoy it? Was it a tough wank?

00:36:50.900 --> 00:36:53.219
Yes, I know. Yeah, it was a really difficult

00:36:53.219 --> 00:36:55.760
wank. Even when the tits were out on two occasions,

00:36:55.820 --> 00:36:59.340
it was a tough wank. Look, there were definitely

00:36:59.340 --> 00:37:01.760
parts about the film I was actually quite impressed

00:37:01.760 --> 00:37:06.139
with and enjoyed. I found bits funny that were

00:37:06.139 --> 00:37:09.199
not meant to be funny and bits not funny which

00:37:09.199 --> 00:37:11.320
were meant to be funny. I had definitely got

00:37:11.320 --> 00:37:13.880
my wires crossed when watching this film. I sat

00:37:13.880 --> 00:37:16.860
there asking myself, is this a comedy? Because

00:37:16.860 --> 00:37:19.699
I genuinely couldn't tell in the first few minutes.

00:37:19.840 --> 00:37:22.579
I was like, is this meant to be funny? Yeah,

00:37:22.619 --> 00:37:25.320
I mean, we're going to go for cons and the weak

00:37:25.320 --> 00:37:27.119
stuff first then. So yeah, it was a shoestring

00:37:27.119 --> 00:37:30.030
budget. It didn't bother me. Some of it you can

00:37:30.030 --> 00:37:35.070
easily tell. Can I, before you get into that,

00:37:35.210 --> 00:37:38.389
I'm going to say one thing that this film does

00:37:38.389 --> 00:37:41.969
very well, which films nowadays do not do. They

00:37:41.969 --> 00:37:46.150
used real science with some of it. Yes. The audio.

00:37:46.690 --> 00:37:52.050
You can't hear anything in space. Every time

00:37:52.050 --> 00:37:56.690
they're in a vacuum of space, there is no sound.

00:37:57.519 --> 00:38:00.059
The machine guns make no sound. Now, they line

00:38:00.059 --> 00:38:02.619
up some music with the machine guns in one part

00:38:02.619 --> 00:38:06.079
and make the music sound machine gunny, which

00:38:06.079 --> 00:38:08.099
actually I didn't like because it kind of implied

00:38:08.099 --> 00:38:10.800
that it was making a sound. But there's a really

00:38:10.800 --> 00:38:14.320
interesting bit where there is, he puts up a

00:38:14.320 --> 00:38:19.059
fucking igloo. A spongy igloo. Don't get me started

00:38:19.059 --> 00:38:21.159
about that scene. That fucking annoyed me, that

00:38:21.159 --> 00:38:24.260
scene. So he gets out of his pocket a spongy

00:38:24.260 --> 00:38:26.809
igloo that appears out of nowhere, right? That's

00:38:26.809 --> 00:38:28.409
a believable piece of science that that thing

00:38:28.409 --> 00:38:30.190
came out of that box. I'm kind of joking about

00:38:30.190 --> 00:38:32.730
it, but actually that... Realistically, if we

00:38:32.730 --> 00:38:34.469
were at the point that we were meant to be in

00:38:34.469 --> 00:38:38.030
this film and that we've got kit like that, then

00:38:38.030 --> 00:38:40.090
you'd expect it to be. And in fact, if you look

00:38:40.090 --> 00:38:45.570
at films like The Martian, all of that base that's

00:38:45.570 --> 00:38:49.940
on Mars is basically... inflatable domes that

00:38:49.940 --> 00:38:52.159
are all interconnected i i did that this is a

00:38:52.159 --> 00:38:54.699
budget constraint the door to get in that bullshit

00:38:54.699 --> 00:38:58.320
there's no way that's creating any kind of atmospheric

00:38:58.320 --> 00:39:03.000
pressure but when he's in there and he starts

00:39:03.000 --> 00:39:06.320
firing his gun it makes a noise until the seal

00:39:06.320 --> 00:39:09.480
is broken and then suddenly the sound cuts off

00:39:09.480 --> 00:39:12.340
because suddenly there's no pressure that what

00:39:12.340 --> 00:39:15.199
a touch when he uses the machine gun to shoot

00:39:15.199 --> 00:39:18.809
his way away from the ship No sound. Every time

00:39:18.809 --> 00:39:22.329
they're in space, the only sound the film is

00:39:22.329 --> 00:39:25.690
giving you is the music, which my issue with

00:39:25.690 --> 00:39:27.829
the music is not that the music was bad. It was

00:39:27.829 --> 00:39:32.289
too loud through the entire film. Whoever put

00:39:32.289 --> 00:39:34.610
the music up, they put it up to nine. It should

00:39:34.610 --> 00:39:37.610
have been on six. Do you know what I mean? It

00:39:37.610 --> 00:39:40.150
completely ruined a lot of the atmosphere, the

00:39:40.150 --> 00:39:41.949
music, because it was just too fucking loud.

00:39:43.289 --> 00:39:47.789
just calm it down a bit that annoyed me uh sorry

00:39:47.789 --> 00:39:53.210
to say every single actor in that film needs

00:39:53.210 --> 00:39:56.269
to go back to acting school for a bit they were

00:39:56.269 --> 00:40:00.110
all bad every one of them was bad i've got um

00:40:00.110 --> 00:40:04.110
the woman was the most now in her defense she

00:40:04.110 --> 00:40:06.500
was probably told to act this way But have I

00:40:06.500 --> 00:40:08.880
ever seen anyone so fucking wooden without walking

00:40:08.880 --> 00:40:12.679
through a forest? I've no idea. Dialogue and

00:40:12.679 --> 00:40:15.559
acting. Clunky lines, which there absolutely

00:40:15.559 --> 00:40:19.440
were. Lots of exposition. Oh, yeah. Got to tell

00:40:19.440 --> 00:40:21.119
a story, even though we're literally watching

00:40:21.119 --> 00:40:24.360
the fucking story. Yeah. And some very wooden

00:40:24.360 --> 00:40:29.239
delivery. Oh, just, ugh. You can't, the thing

00:40:29.239 --> 00:40:33.219
is. Bruce Campbell was doing Bruce Campbell through

00:40:33.219 --> 00:40:34.820
that. So if you know what he's like, that's it.

00:40:34.820 --> 00:40:37.039
Well, he was straight out of Evil Dead 2 at this

00:40:37.039 --> 00:40:39.440
point. You're getting that. So I knew what I

00:40:39.440 --> 00:40:41.219
was going to get with him. Everyone else, I was

00:40:41.219 --> 00:40:43.559
literally watching it flabbergasted that this

00:40:43.559 --> 00:40:45.940
film was being made with these actors because

00:40:45.940 --> 00:40:50.139
they were all terrible. Yeah. Okay. Now, the

00:40:50.139 --> 00:40:52.599
Cylon, because that's what it basically was,

00:40:52.679 --> 00:40:55.500
a fucking Cylon. It looked just like one. I thought

00:40:55.500 --> 00:40:57.880
it was great. So, right, hang on. It was funny,

00:40:58.079 --> 00:41:00.719
but great. Yeah, because again, one of my notes

00:41:00.719 --> 00:41:03.340
here I've got is the... When the arm comes up,

00:41:03.360 --> 00:41:06.179
I laughed my head off. Tone confusion. Bounces

00:41:06.179 --> 00:41:09.400
between horror, action and goofy. Yeah. Never

00:41:09.400 --> 00:41:12.440
commits. Yeah, yeah, you're right. It doesn't

00:41:12.440 --> 00:41:15.250
know what it is. So... Okay, going with the robot.

00:41:15.309 --> 00:41:17.090
The first robot we see then is they bring the

00:41:17.090 --> 00:41:20.829
pod back and it tears apart the medical examination

00:41:20.829 --> 00:41:22.550
room. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then they've got

00:41:22.550 --> 00:41:24.550
it in there. And I just love the scientist. No,

00:41:24.829 --> 00:41:27.469
don't shoot. We must make contact. Get shot.

00:41:27.929 --> 00:41:30.630
Well, I can't even think of what he says. Oh,

00:41:30.989 --> 00:41:33.349
I didn't write that one down. I think it's either...

00:41:33.349 --> 00:41:35.010
He does say fuck or shit, even though it's a

00:41:35.010 --> 00:41:38.949
PG. And then you get... What is it? We don't

00:41:38.949 --> 00:41:42.030
take no shit from machines. Yeah. As Walter Koenig...

00:41:42.190 --> 00:41:44.469
shotguns him from above through the air vents

00:41:44.469 --> 00:41:48.590
yeah it was it's a great robot though yeah it

00:41:48.590 --> 00:41:51.570
as I said if you know what a Cylon looks like

00:41:51.570 --> 00:41:53.449
you know what this robot is but when it first

00:41:53.449 --> 00:41:56.880
like was getting its body built And it had like,

00:41:56.920 --> 00:41:59.380
you know, those grabby arm machines that you

00:41:59.380 --> 00:42:01.260
get in arcades. It basically was one of those

00:42:01.260 --> 00:42:02.940
it had in its arm. And it just kind of appeared

00:42:02.940 --> 00:42:05.139
from behind a plinth. It's like, and this arm

00:42:05.139 --> 00:42:07.679
just comes up this three point. And I laughed

00:42:07.679 --> 00:42:09.219
out loud when I watched that because that was

00:42:09.219 --> 00:42:11.860
genuinely funny. That wasn't meant to be funny,

00:42:11.920 --> 00:42:13.420
which is why I found it funny. Because like,

00:42:13.500 --> 00:42:16.260
they're trying to go for something there. Failed

00:42:16.260 --> 00:42:18.679
miserably. 100%. Absolutely failed that bit.

00:42:18.780 --> 00:42:23.119
But yeah, the creatures were completely believable.

00:42:23.179 --> 00:42:26.820
They were being built out of... As Walter Koenig

00:42:26.820 --> 00:42:30.460
says, my God, that's what we are, spare parts.

00:42:30.719 --> 00:42:35.960
And I still think as comical as it is, and it

00:42:35.960 --> 00:42:38.300
is a comical scene, and I think it was partly

00:42:38.300 --> 00:42:42.300
designed to be comical, but when the moon robot

00:42:42.300 --> 00:42:46.000
looks through the window of the tent just before

00:42:46.000 --> 00:42:49.349
he... opens fire with his space uzi the fact

00:42:49.349 --> 00:42:51.329
that it is you can just clearly see it's meant

00:42:51.329 --> 00:42:53.289
to be one of the robots and it's literally peeled

00:42:53.289 --> 00:42:56.710
bruce campbell's face off and it's a brilliant

00:42:56.710 --> 00:43:00.309
touch it's really dark that was really actually

00:43:00.309 --> 00:43:03.170
quite fucked up and it was doing the bruce campbell

00:43:03.170 --> 00:43:05.929
face like other people can't see that but yeah

00:43:05.929 --> 00:43:08.070
doing that but there was no need for it to have

00:43:08.070 --> 00:43:10.130
done that really no because none of the others

00:43:10.130 --> 00:43:12.829
do that none of the other robots have got what

00:43:13.289 --> 00:43:14.690
There's a bit where they're inside the alien

00:43:14.690 --> 00:43:17.010
spaceship and the one that comes down that tries

00:43:17.010 --> 00:43:19.329
to... Which is chopping them up. Did you notice

00:43:19.329 --> 00:43:20.409
in the head it looked like there was a brain

00:43:20.409 --> 00:43:22.369
in there? Yeah. Yeah, I noticed it looked like

00:43:22.369 --> 00:43:24.889
there was a human's brain inside it. Or a brain.

00:43:25.130 --> 00:43:27.829
But that's what I kind of liked about this, actually.

00:43:27.869 --> 00:43:30.880
The idea of these... technically they're cyborgs

00:43:30.880 --> 00:43:32.599
aren't they a robot that's made out of human

00:43:32.599 --> 00:43:36.039
plus mechanical is cyborg i really like the idea

00:43:36.039 --> 00:43:38.000
of and i think actually it was they were very

00:43:38.000 --> 00:43:40.739
cleverly done and okay it does look a bit clunky

00:43:40.739 --> 00:43:42.559
nowadays you've got the practical effects of

00:43:42.559 --> 00:43:45.780
when you've got the two of them holding the dolls

00:43:45.780 --> 00:43:48.059
that have been dressed up in an astronaut costume

00:43:48.059 --> 00:43:50.199
and walking across the moon holding them yeah

00:43:50.199 --> 00:43:52.480
and they've suddenly become like 40 foot tall

00:43:52.480 --> 00:43:55.400
things it's like not sure what happened in that

00:43:55.400 --> 00:43:58.039
scene we'll watch over that one that's a few

00:43:58.039 --> 00:44:01.610
bits like that it's like They had ideas, didn't

00:44:01.610 --> 00:44:03.889
quite make it. It's okay, they tried. Let's go,

00:44:03.969 --> 00:44:06.550
let's continue. Yeah, and I mean, we're sticking

00:44:06.550 --> 00:44:08.650
with the negatives again. Like we said with Star

00:44:08.650 --> 00:44:12.409
Trek earlier, the pacing is off. Yeah. It goes

00:44:12.409 --> 00:44:16.469
from fast kind of what's going on to then this

00:44:16.469 --> 00:44:22.150
slow. Something is not right with it on the pacing

00:44:22.150 --> 00:44:27.010
side. And I kind of, it does throw you off a

00:44:27.010 --> 00:44:30.420
little bit. And that ties in with the not committing

00:44:30.420 --> 00:44:32.579
to what type of film it wanted to be. It could

00:44:32.579 --> 00:44:35.380
have been a horror. Wanting to keep that PG status

00:44:35.380 --> 00:44:38.940
means you can't go that horror with it at that

00:44:38.940 --> 00:44:41.699
point. It's difficult. I want to tell you about

00:44:41.699 --> 00:44:44.579
my least favourite bit of the entire film, which

00:44:44.579 --> 00:44:49.639
was then instantly joined with one of my favourite

00:44:49.639 --> 00:44:52.659
bits. Instantly. So I'm going to read my notes

00:44:52.659 --> 00:44:55.019
and you're going to guess what bit I'm talking

00:44:55.019 --> 00:44:59.110
about. Okay. What a fucking death scene. Take

00:44:59.110 --> 00:45:03.429
no shit from machine. Manic laughter. As if that

00:45:03.429 --> 00:45:06.489
tent is air sealed. If they fuck, this is going

00:45:06.489 --> 00:45:10.710
to be so fucking dumb. That kiss, dumb. Tits

00:45:10.710 --> 00:45:15.690
again, dumb. That's awkward. His mate's dead.

00:45:15.849 --> 00:45:20.000
Five minutes later, he's shagging. Ha! that face

00:45:20.000 --> 00:45:23.639
now what am I talking about Bruce Campbell going

00:45:23.639 --> 00:45:27.739
so I'm talking about his mate just died and he

00:45:27.739 --> 00:45:32.139
solemnly walks back puts the tent in then shags

00:45:32.139 --> 00:45:34.699
the woman yep and then he gets attacked by Bruce

00:45:34.699 --> 00:45:36.480
Campbell by the way we've got to say he's wearing

00:45:36.480 --> 00:45:39.820
an ancient space suit who's wearing a 14 000

00:45:39.820 --> 00:45:43.059
as we kept being reminded 14 000 year old spacesuit

00:45:43.059 --> 00:45:47.000
what is like that voyager f threshold this film's

00:45:47.000 --> 00:45:49.840
threshold was the 14 000 i was gonna do a little

00:45:49.840 --> 00:45:52.179
quiz for this one and be like oh we haven't done

00:45:52.179 --> 00:45:54.360
that in ages this was what i was going to bring

00:45:54.360 --> 00:45:56.980
it back and my first question was how many years

00:45:56.980 --> 00:45:59.900
i started writing questions like the amount of

00:45:59.900 --> 00:46:05.250
time they said 14 000 i give up I mean, as I

00:46:05.250 --> 00:46:06.849
said, I thought the design of the robots was

00:46:06.849 --> 00:46:09.349
good. The design of the ship is really good.

00:46:09.510 --> 00:46:11.949
Yeah, yeah, I'm good with that. And the bits,

00:46:12.010 --> 00:46:15.530
again, questionable. Why have they got Uzis?

00:46:15.769 --> 00:46:18.929
Why would you equip the weapon of choice being

00:46:18.929 --> 00:46:23.769
the automatic pistol? I don't know. It's a very,

00:46:23.809 --> 00:46:26.170
very odd choice. Let me tell you what. So when

00:46:26.170 --> 00:46:29.690
the Cylon was first made and he's walking down

00:46:29.690 --> 00:46:31.750
the hallway and then that guy who I thought was

00:46:31.750 --> 00:46:33.750
going to get instantly killed. Somehow didn't

00:46:33.750 --> 00:46:36.809
get killed, but he got attacked instantly. I

00:46:36.809 --> 00:46:38.949
thought it was going to be, they're looking up

00:46:38.949 --> 00:46:41.469
at the ceiling and they could see the, they're

00:46:41.469 --> 00:46:42.889
trying to figure out how to kill this guy because

00:46:42.889 --> 00:46:44.789
they're shooting it with every weapon they've

00:46:44.789 --> 00:46:47.349
got. By the way, he wasn't made out of bulletproof

00:46:47.349 --> 00:46:49.389
material. He was made out of metal that he found

00:46:49.389 --> 00:46:51.909
in their office. So he would definitely have

00:46:51.909 --> 00:46:53.949
been blown up from all those guns. That bit,

00:46:53.989 --> 00:46:56.590
I thought, okay, creative license here. It's

00:46:56.590 --> 00:46:59.769
a film. Let's just move on. They look up at the

00:46:59.769 --> 00:47:01.789
ceiling, Bruce Campbell and Chekhov. Look up

00:47:01.789 --> 00:47:04.519
at the ceiling. and they see the sprinkler system.

00:47:04.820 --> 00:47:07.900
And I go, of course. Just get him wet. Get him

00:47:07.900 --> 00:47:09.800
wet, electrocute him. That makes total sense

00:47:09.800 --> 00:47:14.019
to me. He'll rust. Whatever. That's a plot point

00:47:14.019 --> 00:47:15.159
I can understand. You've got to confuse with

00:47:15.159 --> 00:47:18.059
gremlins. We can't get them wet. I know that

00:47:18.059 --> 00:47:19.780
rule at this point in time. What's the time?

00:47:19.920 --> 00:47:21.380
What's the time? Quickly, give him something

00:47:21.380 --> 00:47:25.219
to eat. And I was like, okay, that's what they're

00:47:25.219 --> 00:47:26.440
going to do. And then I was looking and thinking,

00:47:26.639 --> 00:47:28.639
well, actually, there's a lot of smoke in this

00:47:28.639 --> 00:47:31.349
room already. So those... Fire alarm should already

00:47:31.349 --> 00:47:33.769
be going off, which it wasn't. Well, it turns

00:47:33.769 --> 00:47:35.710
out Chekhov's idea, even though we're looking

00:47:35.710 --> 00:47:38.409
at the pipe with the war thing, is actually to

00:47:38.409 --> 00:47:41.710
crawl through the vents, struggle with a very

00:47:41.710 --> 00:47:45.090
light bit of metal, by the way, and then point

00:47:45.090 --> 00:47:47.820
blank shotgun the robot in the head. And I was

00:47:47.820 --> 00:47:50.139
like, okay, so that's a way of doing it. But

00:47:50.139 --> 00:47:52.820
it's a great shot that they get of its head exploding

00:47:52.820 --> 00:47:55.320
when he blows up. Really well done. Well, they

00:47:55.320 --> 00:47:57.900
disintegrated it, basically. But it looked really

00:47:57.900 --> 00:48:03.539
good. As you say, every negative you find, somewhere

00:48:03.539 --> 00:48:08.199
nearby is a positive. Yeah, all the bits with

00:48:08.199 --> 00:48:11.340
the robot. I like the robot going, zipping around

00:48:11.340 --> 00:48:15.619
in the moon dust. I thought that was pretty sweet.

00:48:15.900 --> 00:48:18.000
That was very cool. I quite liked that. See,

00:48:18.019 --> 00:48:19.739
I quite liked the robot that they had in the

00:48:19.739 --> 00:48:21.559
spaceship that literally just starts cutting

00:48:21.559 --> 00:48:24.719
the clothes off them. Yeah, the slowest torture

00:48:24.719 --> 00:48:26.940
robot ever. It instantly went for her clothes.

00:48:27.139 --> 00:48:29.940
It wasn't actually taking her body bits off.

00:48:29.960 --> 00:48:33.139
It's PG, ladies and gents. We don't have a 12

00:48:33.139 --> 00:48:35.699
or a 15 at this point. We only have PG and R

00:48:35.699 --> 00:48:38.260
rating. Yeah, but in PG's now, you wouldn't get

00:48:38.260 --> 00:48:42.079
full -on tits. No, it'd be a 12. Well, 12A. And

00:48:42.079 --> 00:48:44.119
they were in a strip club as well at the beginning,

00:48:44.219 --> 00:48:46.440
by the way. So you see a woman with no top on

00:48:46.440 --> 00:48:49.199
then doing a dance in the titty bar. That's very

00:48:49.199 --> 00:48:51.119
true. And then you get a full on, I mean, the

00:48:51.119 --> 00:48:52.820
woman's very attractive. It was a nice watch.

00:48:52.920 --> 00:48:55.340
I'm not going to complain about that. But Jesus

00:48:55.340 --> 00:48:59.360
Christ, she was boring. And it was so awkward

00:48:59.360 --> 00:49:03.920
too. Oh, the kiss was awful to watch. I just

00:49:03.920 --> 00:49:07.639
felt awful just sat there watching him. And her.

00:49:07.800 --> 00:49:10.239
So I showed you a clip of this. And if you go

00:49:10.239 --> 00:49:12.739
onto my TikTok, we'll try and put it in the metadata

00:49:12.739 --> 00:49:15.900
so you can get the link to it. Moontrap Target

00:49:15.900 --> 00:49:18.639
Earth came out in 2017, which is the sequel to

00:49:18.639 --> 00:49:20.760
this film. I mean, tits are in that. It has nothing

00:49:20.760 --> 00:49:23.619
to do with this film. In fact, it has very little

00:49:23.619 --> 00:49:26.219
to do with anything that this film creates at

00:49:26.219 --> 00:49:30.460
all. And it's by the same fucking director. And

00:49:30.460 --> 00:49:33.599
he didn't even follow. How? I mean. You just

00:49:33.599 --> 00:49:36.889
take the name. yeah you know i've got to re -watch

00:49:36.889 --> 00:49:38.469
it probably does have something to do with it

00:49:38.469 --> 00:49:41.869
but it's full of masons and stuff like that and

00:49:41.869 --> 00:49:47.869
if anything the effects are worse as that clip

00:49:47.869 --> 00:49:49.730
will show you and you you saw that clip last

00:49:49.730 --> 00:49:51.550
but it looked like basically someone had just

00:49:51.550 --> 00:49:55.710
gone okay keyframe slide it in keyframe press

00:49:55.710 --> 00:50:00.449
play and then it comes um just ridiculous absolutely

00:50:00.449 --> 00:50:04.599
ridiculous um how he didn't even continue because

00:50:04.599 --> 00:50:07.099
it was set up for a perfect sequel that pod at

00:50:07.099 --> 00:50:09.800
the end in the junkyard and just thought even

00:50:09.800 --> 00:50:12.480
if that had made a bit of money you could have

00:50:12.480 --> 00:50:14.440
done a really good sequel with it being based

00:50:14.440 --> 00:50:17.320
on earth yeah that would have worked brilliant

00:50:17.320 --> 00:50:18.840
and you could have actually just centered it

00:50:18.840 --> 00:50:21.260
around this junkyard like one of these junkyards

00:50:21.260 --> 00:50:25.239
in america that's just on acres of land and it's

00:50:25.239 --> 00:50:28.219
slowly taking over this this junkyard and you

00:50:28.219 --> 00:50:30.920
could have it as like the person that owns the

00:50:30.920 --> 00:50:33.300
junkyard and his family take on this fucking

00:50:33.300 --> 00:50:37.260
monster yeah uh spoilers this is actually a prequel

00:50:37.260 --> 00:50:39.019
to transformers and that's how they get there

00:50:39.019 --> 00:50:43.000
very good yeah yeah not enough lens flare though

00:50:43.000 --> 00:50:45.539
for michael bay oh yeah not enough for him uh

00:50:45.539 --> 00:50:49.019
there was a scene that i again i laughed at where

00:50:49.019 --> 00:50:51.199
the miniatures are quite good the miniatures

00:50:51.199 --> 00:50:53.059
of the spaceships we got the guy i thought they

00:50:53.059 --> 00:50:55.929
were very good yeah the guy orbiting when they've

00:50:55.929 --> 00:50:57.909
gone back to the moon for the second time. He's

00:50:57.909 --> 00:50:59.849
going around, and then his ship gets attacked.

00:50:59.969 --> 00:51:01.449
He gets zapped, and then instantly he just goes

00:51:01.449 --> 00:51:04.309
off axis. The key frame is that suddenly he's

00:51:04.309 --> 00:51:06.449
off axis and just floats down. I'm like, that's

00:51:06.449 --> 00:51:09.210
fucking awful. The really crap lightning bolt

00:51:09.210 --> 00:51:11.809
that hits it and goes like this, and off he goes.

00:51:11.909 --> 00:51:14.070
And they just suddenly tilted the miniature by

00:51:14.070 --> 00:51:17.070
like 30 degrees, didn't they, instantly. So clearly

00:51:17.070 --> 00:51:19.349
they didn't do anything. They just rotated the

00:51:19.349 --> 00:51:22.469
fucking film. Because he kind of then continued

00:51:22.469 --> 00:51:25.710
on in the... It's so bad. Yeah, that was awful.

00:51:25.969 --> 00:51:27.969
I was like, come on, you didn't try. They thought

00:51:27.969 --> 00:51:29.730
about it afterwards. They go, ooh, shouldn't

00:51:29.730 --> 00:51:31.550
we make this ship look like it reacted to that

00:51:31.550 --> 00:51:33.789
lightning bolt? Oh, yeah, fuck it, just spin

00:51:33.789 --> 00:51:35.250
it 30 degrees. I mean, it could have been worse.

00:51:35.289 --> 00:51:36.949
They could have just turned the interior lights

00:51:36.949 --> 00:51:39.730
off. Oh, no, I've got no power. Yeah, well, they

00:51:39.730 --> 00:51:42.260
might as well have done that too. And then, you

00:51:42.260 --> 00:51:45.699
know, lo and behold, they were waiting 14 ,000

00:51:45.699 --> 00:51:48.119
years for someone to land on the moon again because

00:51:48.119 --> 00:51:51.599
a specific piece of technology they needed was

00:51:51.599 --> 00:51:54.059
on a moon lander. Oh, of course, yes, they needed...

00:51:54.059 --> 00:51:57.329
I just... Yeah, the one thing they needed for

00:51:57.329 --> 00:51:58.849
their giant ship, and I'm guessing was it to

00:51:58.849 --> 00:52:01.349
power the giant ship? They never explain it,

00:52:01.369 --> 00:52:02.690
and that's one of the other problems with this

00:52:02.690 --> 00:52:05.269
film is nothing is ever fully explained. What

00:52:05.269 --> 00:52:07.690
would have been better if actually it was them

00:52:07.690 --> 00:52:11.409
going back to the moon reactivated the robots?

00:52:11.610 --> 00:52:14.690
They were dormant. Yes. And them going back and

00:52:14.690 --> 00:52:17.409
then going into that weird tower thing where

00:52:17.409 --> 00:52:22.769
the stupid woman is. is what activates them.

00:52:22.829 --> 00:52:25.030
And then they just happen to attach the moon

00:52:25.030 --> 00:52:26.869
lander to their ship because that's what they

00:52:26.869 --> 00:52:31.929
do. That is much better than we needed that very

00:52:31.929 --> 00:52:34.030
specific piece of technology in the moon lander.

00:52:34.030 --> 00:52:36.590
I was like, what's on it? What's on the fucking

00:52:36.590 --> 00:52:39.769
moon lander that you need? Well, yeah, again,

00:52:39.849 --> 00:52:41.010
it's never explained. It's got a computer in

00:52:41.010 --> 00:52:42.409
its brain. Maybe they didn't know how to make

00:52:42.409 --> 00:52:43.989
computers, so they're using the computer of the

00:52:43.989 --> 00:52:46.369
moon lander. I always just presumed, was it something

00:52:46.369 --> 00:52:49.139
like they would... Messing around with the idea

00:52:49.139 --> 00:52:51.539
that it had like a nuclear battery or something.

00:52:51.639 --> 00:52:54.480
Was it just that they needed power? But how would

00:52:54.480 --> 00:52:56.719
a little moon lander's battery power that great

00:52:56.719 --> 00:52:59.099
big giant ship? It made a pretty fucking big

00:52:59.099 --> 00:53:01.739
explosion with a massive bit that says detonator.

00:53:02.519 --> 00:53:05.380
Inside the control panel. Yeah, so that's on

00:53:05.380 --> 00:53:07.500
the moon lander itself, isn't it? They've got

00:53:07.500 --> 00:53:09.460
a nuke on board, apparently, to make sure no

00:53:09.460 --> 00:53:12.380
one steals it. So we'll just detonate the nuke

00:53:12.380 --> 00:53:15.239
that's included. Which actually kind of makes

00:53:15.239 --> 00:53:17.000
sense for the era that it was made. Don't forget,

00:53:17.059 --> 00:53:20.400
this is 80s film. Depending on when the director

00:53:20.400 --> 00:53:22.199
started working on it, could have started working

00:53:22.199 --> 00:53:24.960
in the late 70s. So we're still at the end, or

00:53:24.960 --> 00:53:28.340
coming towards the end of what was the Cold War.

00:53:29.050 --> 00:53:31.690
Yeah. So a lot of writers went down the line

00:53:31.690 --> 00:53:35.309
of, if we create something that is space, then

00:53:35.309 --> 00:53:38.269
we would have a way of destroying it because

00:53:38.269 --> 00:53:40.309
obviously we don't want it to land into the hands

00:53:40.309 --> 00:53:44.250
of the Russians. And that's all from real life.

00:53:44.750 --> 00:53:47.769
If you look at World War II, when our British

00:53:47.769 --> 00:53:50.949
bombers crashed, if they were taken out by the

00:53:50.949 --> 00:53:55.789
Germans, the surviving crew's jobs were to smash

00:53:55.789 --> 00:53:59.039
every single dial. bit of equipment and torch

00:53:59.039 --> 00:54:01.820
the aircraft so that the Germans couldn't get

00:54:01.820 --> 00:54:04.079
their hands on our technology. Well, they do

00:54:04.079 --> 00:54:06.179
that in Dunkirk. Not Dunkirk. What's the one

00:54:06.179 --> 00:54:10.440
when all the boats come over to collect everybody?

00:54:11.280 --> 00:54:13.719
Is that Dunkirk? Yes, Dunkirk. Yeah, he does

00:54:13.719 --> 00:54:15.340
that when he crashes his Spitfire. At the end,

00:54:15.360 --> 00:54:17.179
he sits on fire, doesn't he? Exactly. Then he

00:54:17.179 --> 00:54:24.119
gets captured. It's taken from real life. To

00:54:24.119 --> 00:54:26.340
take it into sci -fi, then yeah, I guess you're

00:54:26.340 --> 00:54:28.679
talking about the great space race and everything

00:54:28.679 --> 00:54:30.900
like that and Cold War. You're not going to want

00:54:30.900 --> 00:54:32.420
Russia getting hold of it. So it kind of makes

00:54:32.420 --> 00:54:34.079
sense that you'd have some way of destroying

00:54:34.079 --> 00:54:36.119
it. And in space, I guess, what would you do?

00:54:36.219 --> 00:54:39.900
An explosive device kind of makes sense. There's

00:54:39.900 --> 00:54:41.840
a little moment, you know, when he does kill

00:54:41.840 --> 00:54:46.050
the creature that's killed his mate. And he does

00:54:46.050 --> 00:54:49.150
the son of a bitch quote, like it's from Jaws.

00:54:49.150 --> 00:54:51.010
And I did actually go and then check when Jaws

00:54:51.010 --> 00:54:52.510
come out. I was like, yeah, Jaws come out in

00:54:52.510 --> 00:54:54.250
75. I think they're clearly trying to have that

00:54:54.250 --> 00:54:58.070
moment here. What makes me laugh about all of

00:54:58.070 --> 00:55:01.130
it, it's just like, is this Walter Koerner going,

00:55:01.389 --> 00:55:04.230
Chekhov was never allowed to be rude or do anything

00:55:04.230 --> 00:55:07.269
cool. So this is his chance. But he doesn't come

00:55:07.269 --> 00:55:10.730
off cool. No, he doesn't. It's like when he's

00:55:10.730 --> 00:55:12.650
doing the press ups versus his son, all you think

00:55:12.650 --> 00:55:15.309
is. competitive dad and you're a dick yeah you're

00:55:15.309 --> 00:55:19.969
a knob but so I think that I don't think it's

00:55:19.969 --> 00:55:22.389
a particularly good film but I also don't think

00:55:22.389 --> 00:55:24.630
it's a particularly bad film I think that maybe

00:55:24.630 --> 00:55:26.750
you like it as much I'm just putting this out

00:55:26.750 --> 00:55:28.230
here that maybe you like as much as you do because

00:55:28.230 --> 00:55:31.210
you've got a nostalgic remembering of it so yeah

00:55:31.210 --> 00:55:34.489
I don't have that I'm blinded by nostalgia for

00:55:34.489 --> 00:55:38.679
it absolutely I like it because I think actually

00:55:38.679 --> 00:55:42.000
as sci -fi goes it's quite a good idea it's just

00:55:42.000 --> 00:55:46.360
a shame it's not applied in a better way but

00:55:46.360 --> 00:55:48.139
you could take the premise of the film and do

00:55:48.139 --> 00:55:51.260
it now modern you could do really well with it

00:55:51.260 --> 00:55:54.500
actually yeah the idea of the film is isn't bad

00:55:54.500 --> 00:55:57.840
i i think i give credit where credit's due the

00:55:57.840 --> 00:56:00.380
miniatures whilst they looked a bit funny sometimes

00:56:00.380 --> 00:56:04.219
they were very good that i liked the alien i

00:56:04.219 --> 00:56:07.949
really did think that whoever did the advising

00:56:07.949 --> 00:56:11.449
on the science aspect of it did a great job that

00:56:11.449 --> 00:56:15.449
really i can't iterate enough that sound not

00:56:15.449 --> 00:56:18.090
being there i because it took me a little while

00:56:18.090 --> 00:56:22.329
to notice to be doing that back then i think

00:56:22.329 --> 00:56:25.389
that is brilliant and that that is why that's

00:56:25.389 --> 00:56:27.070
where we were giving credit but i think the film

00:56:27.070 --> 00:56:30.349
overall my opinion of it is not very good i didn't

00:56:30.349 --> 00:56:32.550
really enjoy it there were moments i enjoyed

00:56:32.550 --> 00:56:37.269
but overall i was a bit like Fucking hell. No,

00:56:37.369 --> 00:56:38.969
fair enough. Especially when he shagged that

00:56:38.969 --> 00:56:42.210
fucking woman. That really did me in. How would

00:56:42.210 --> 00:56:45.590
I fix it? I mean, I could... If I was doing a

00:56:45.590 --> 00:56:47.889
modern version of it, there's quite a lot you

00:56:47.889 --> 00:56:52.110
need to fix annoyingly, but you could. Obviously,

00:56:52.170 --> 00:56:54.269
you wouldn't have them such space cowboys. I

00:56:54.269 --> 00:56:58.239
guess what you'd have is probably... Chris Pratt

00:56:58.239 --> 00:57:01.000
would be in it. I would suggest that the big

00:57:01.000 --> 00:57:02.940
ship that's kind of been abandoned, awaiting

00:57:02.940 --> 00:57:06.840
to come to life, would be behind the moon out

00:57:06.840 --> 00:57:08.460
of view. So we've never seen it because it's

00:57:08.460 --> 00:57:09.960
just always on the dark side of the moon. We've

00:57:09.960 --> 00:57:11.980
never seen it because it's just blocked by our

00:57:11.980 --> 00:57:15.980
own satellite. I would have that as it's 14 ,000

00:57:15.980 --> 00:57:18.219
years old, and I'd make sure we say 14 ,000 years

00:57:18.219 --> 00:57:20.519
old because 14 ,000 years old is really important

00:57:20.519 --> 00:57:23.639
to the story. Yeah, 14 ,000. But the 14 ,000

00:57:23.639 --> 00:57:25.719
-year -old ship would start to break apart and

00:57:25.719 --> 00:57:27.960
a big chunk of it would just land. on on earth

00:57:27.960 --> 00:57:30.380
yeah we'd investigate we'd find this pod thing

00:57:30.380 --> 00:57:32.139
and obviously it comes like and then that's where

00:57:32.139 --> 00:57:33.860
you take it from there so then we send someone

00:57:33.860 --> 00:57:36.400
to go and investigate it we land on the moon

00:57:36.400 --> 00:57:38.460
temple scene you could actually leave the temple

00:57:38.460 --> 00:57:41.840
on there you could have it just verging into

00:57:41.840 --> 00:57:43.519
the dark side of the moon so it's not something

00:57:43.519 --> 00:57:47.260
that we we've easily seen and i guess in fact

00:57:47.260 --> 00:57:49.300
you wouldn't technically i wouldn't have the

00:57:49.300 --> 00:57:52.230
temple i'd have another crashed ship because

00:57:52.230 --> 00:57:54.110
the idea is if we've got this giant ship already

00:57:54.110 --> 00:57:56.489
and we've got a 14 000 i'd have another crashed

00:57:56.489 --> 00:57:59.409
ship and a bit like aliens some sort of cryosa

00:57:59.409 --> 00:58:02.050
and you just all of them are dead bar one now

00:58:02.050 --> 00:58:06.750
or they need biomaterial to fuel stuff which

00:58:06.750 --> 00:58:08.610
is why they couldn't leave the moon and that's

00:58:08.610 --> 00:58:11.070
why that woman's still there in stasis because

00:58:11.070 --> 00:58:14.590
they're keep trying to keep her alive to drain

00:58:14.590 --> 00:58:17.969
her energy to keep them on low power for 14 000

00:58:17.969 --> 00:58:21.400
years But they can't lift their ship off because

00:58:21.400 --> 00:58:25.159
they need more biological material. Yeah. And

00:58:25.159 --> 00:58:29.239
then people coming to the moon, maybe the first

00:58:29.239 --> 00:58:31.480
trip of people coming to the moon, those people

00:58:31.480 --> 00:58:35.639
get captured and turned into mush. And the ship

00:58:35.639 --> 00:58:37.639
can boot up because they've got enough energy

00:58:37.639 --> 00:58:39.539
from these people turning to mush. Yeah, and

00:58:39.539 --> 00:58:42.619
they end up on C colon and they can type win

00:58:42.619 --> 00:58:45.559
and Windows 95 boots up. But no, I agree. And

00:58:45.559 --> 00:58:51.519
then you have... The whole battle with them on

00:58:51.519 --> 00:58:54.559
the moon just between... Again, it's a bit odd

00:58:54.559 --> 00:58:57.380
that they only send two astronauts up. Yeah.

00:58:57.719 --> 00:58:59.500
We're talking about things going back in the

00:58:59.500 --> 00:59:02.699
film. So you'd have a crew that would go up and

00:59:02.699 --> 00:59:05.260
then you'd have them actually discover the robots,

00:59:05.340 --> 00:59:07.940
discover the woman. The crew would get broken

00:59:07.940 --> 00:59:11.400
down to maybe the last one or two people. Some

00:59:11.400 --> 00:59:13.719
weird survival woman. There's no need to shag

00:59:13.719 --> 00:59:15.880
her. It's not the 80s. It's just not the done

00:59:15.880 --> 00:59:17.880
thing anymore. She can't consent. She can't ask

00:59:17.880 --> 00:59:20.039
for a cup of tea. She doesn't speak English.

00:59:20.900 --> 00:59:25.659
Moon trap. More like booby trap. Booby trap.

00:59:25.980 --> 00:59:34.639
Because there's all the boobs in it. Booby. Transfer

00:59:34.639 --> 00:59:41.000
complete. Right. Next time, we're going slightly

00:59:41.000 --> 00:59:43.679
more modern. Hang on a moment. Let's see if they

00:59:43.679 --> 00:59:46.940
can guess it from this hint. According to the

00:59:46.940 --> 00:59:50.800
Exploding Helicopter website, this film features

00:59:50.800 --> 00:59:54.460
13 exploding helicopters, the most ever seen

00:59:54.460 --> 00:59:58.340
in any one film. Do you know the film we're talking

00:59:58.340 --> 01:00:01.920
about, ladies and gentlemen? Do you? It's 2024's

01:00:01.920 --> 01:00:10.920
smash hit, Alien colon Rubicon. I saw this as

01:00:10.920 --> 01:00:15.539
a trailer on Amazon Prime. and i watched it and

01:00:15.539 --> 01:00:18.380
miranda and i both went this looks dreadful i

01:00:18.380 --> 01:00:21.119
instantly texted to tj said shall we watch this

01:00:21.119 --> 01:00:25.920
next time 2 .4 on imdb yeah and the first review

01:00:25.920 --> 01:00:31.360
worst movie i've seen this century no that's

01:00:31.360 --> 01:00:34.579
gonna be a good one because we've watched amazon's

01:00:34.579 --> 01:00:37.599
war of the worlds so i don't think it'll be the

01:00:37.599 --> 01:00:40.619
worst one we'll have seen this century but Who

01:00:40.619 --> 01:00:43.420
knows? I don't think the trailer looked enough

01:00:43.420 --> 01:00:46.780
to say it's the worst film ever. It looks bad.

01:00:47.179 --> 01:00:50.320
It looks atrocious, but sorry, terrible acting

01:00:50.320 --> 01:00:54.039
like really bad. Reading the pack of soap bottles

01:00:54.039 --> 01:00:55.940
and other things when you're sat on the toilet

01:00:55.940 --> 01:01:00.139
is more entertaining than this. Oh, yeah. Can't

01:01:00.139 --> 01:01:03.900
review it with a zero score. Yeah, it's... Massive

01:01:03.900 --> 01:01:06.300
swing and a miss. So it's a film by The Asylum,

01:01:06.380 --> 01:01:08.019
which if you've listened to The Variety Show

01:01:08.019 --> 01:01:10.079
recently, you'll know are one of these companies

01:01:10.079 --> 01:01:14.139
that make mockbusters. So any film that does

01:01:14.139 --> 01:01:17.380
well as a blockbuster will get a mockbuster.

01:01:18.780 --> 01:01:21.019
And this is just their version of Alien. To the

01:01:21.019 --> 01:01:22.599
point where we thought it was another version

01:01:22.599 --> 01:01:24.840
of Alien because of the picture. Well, I presume...

01:01:24.840 --> 01:01:27.539
Oh, is this the sequel to Alien Romulus? So this

01:01:27.539 --> 01:01:29.219
is going to be Alien Rubicon? Because I'm pretty

01:01:29.219 --> 01:01:32.260
sure it wasn't... Oh, no, it's Romulus and Remus,

01:01:32.260 --> 01:01:35.119
actually. Yeah. So I presume when you said, oh,

01:01:35.179 --> 01:01:36.860
have you seen this trailer? Do you want us to

01:01:36.860 --> 01:01:38.699
do this for the show? I thought, oh, brilliant.

01:01:39.440 --> 01:01:41.340
That's the next alien that they were talking

01:01:41.340 --> 01:01:44.420
about. Oh, so disappointed. I generally thought

01:01:44.420 --> 01:01:46.719
it was going to be anime. When I just saw the

01:01:46.719 --> 01:01:48.719
picture, I was like, oh, maybe it's going to

01:01:48.719 --> 01:01:51.420
be some CGI or some anime to do with alien. I

01:01:51.420 --> 01:01:53.300
thought this could be good. And then, yeah, we

01:01:53.300 --> 01:01:55.019
clicked it. What's trans like this as an anime?

01:01:55.340 --> 01:01:58.130
Oh, my God. Then again, then the other thoughts

01:01:58.130 --> 01:02:00.170
that went through my mind as well is they still

01:02:00.170 --> 01:02:02.809
make Rubicon the drink. Is this a Halloween one?

01:02:03.030 --> 01:02:05.010
This is what happens when you have too many Rubicons.

01:02:05.090 --> 01:02:07.090
This is why it has best before day. I thought

01:02:07.090 --> 01:02:10.369
it was Halloween flavour. Oh, yeah. It'll be

01:02:10.369 --> 01:02:15.130
a lime green Rubicon. Anyway, right. Alien Rubicon.

01:02:15.230 --> 01:02:19.190
It's on Prime Video. That's where I saw it. I'm

01:02:19.190 --> 01:02:21.269
assuming that's probably the only place. If you

01:02:21.269 --> 01:02:23.690
happen to be subscribed, don't buy the bloody...

01:02:24.000 --> 01:02:26.960
thing just don't give them money that's a bad

01:02:26.960 --> 01:02:30.840
thing yeah um if you keep encouraging them they're

01:02:30.840 --> 01:02:33.920
gonna keep doing it if we keep buying these bloody

01:02:33.920 --> 01:02:36.619
movies i'll keep fucking making yeah it's only

01:02:36.619 --> 01:02:39.239
streaming on prime at the moment otherwise you

01:02:39.239 --> 01:02:41.980
have to rent or buy it yeah 2 .4 out of 10 amazon

01:02:41.980 --> 01:02:44.280
i'm actually looking forward to it so that's

01:02:44.280 --> 01:02:46.929
next time Oh, my God. I just realized as well,

01:02:46.949 --> 01:02:49.630
just looking at that, the Alien Earth logo, the

01:02:49.630 --> 01:02:52.250
front poster versus the Alien Rubicon poster.

01:02:52.250 --> 01:02:55.449
We know what they were doing. We see you, Alien

01:02:55.449 --> 01:03:02.369
Rubicon. Command functions are offline. And that's

01:03:02.369 --> 01:03:05.630
it for another episode of the Untitled Sci -Fi

01:03:05.630 --> 01:03:09.849
Show. I have been Rob. He over there, the lovely

01:03:09.849 --> 01:03:14.050
man opposite me, has been Tom. Hello. Hello.

01:03:14.809 --> 01:03:17.469
Is the show starting? We did do an introduction.

01:03:17.650 --> 01:03:19.969
Did we? It's just I quickly pressed record while

01:03:19.969 --> 01:03:24.250
you were on your cucumber tirade. That's true,

01:03:24.309 --> 01:03:27.010
isn't it? It's before I said just slide it out

01:03:27.010 --> 01:03:30.469
of your Wi -Fi so slightly. That's the one. We

01:03:30.469 --> 01:03:34.690
are part of a collection of indie podcasts called

01:03:34.690 --> 01:03:38.389
Studio Channel 84, which is the variety show

01:03:38.389 --> 01:03:41.269
with these lovely chaps. Not sure what their

01:03:41.269 --> 01:03:46.389
names are. Bob and Dave. John and Phil. Jimothy.

01:03:46.690 --> 01:03:51.989
Jimothy. And James, Super8az, Karen and Adam

01:03:51.989 --> 01:03:55.269
from Lightly Used, Ross and Simon. I did it that

01:03:55.269 --> 01:03:57.809
way around this time. Who takes the socks off?

01:03:57.889 --> 01:04:00.730
You can find everyone's links, everyone's details,

01:04:00.989 --> 01:04:06.050
everyone's whatever's on channel84 .co .uk. Please

01:04:06.050 --> 01:04:09.349
do send in your guesses and what you think the

01:04:09.349 --> 01:04:12.610
connection is for... this episode's guess the

01:04:12.610 --> 01:04:15.929
intro i do really like seeing everyone's guesses

01:04:15.929 --> 01:04:18.489
when they send them in any interaction is always

01:04:18.489 --> 01:04:22.050
brilliant please do we do reply we enjoy it it's

01:04:22.050 --> 01:04:28.670
great fun um welcome james to the again to the

01:04:28.670 --> 01:04:32.530
uh winner's lounge i'll put the kettle on love

01:04:32.530 --> 01:04:40.820
you all bye Thank you for listening to the Untitled

01:04:40.820 --> 01:04:45.159
Sci -Fi Show. This station is now shutting down

01:04:45.159 --> 01:05:03.340
and will be back in two weeks. May the Force

01:05:03.340 --> 01:05:31.590
live long and prosper inside of you. Tune in

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this Sunday with Simon and Is It Garage?