1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:09,520
He's finally finished drinking. He has finally finished drinking and now he's gonna go and

2
00:00:09,520 --> 00:00:14,720
piss on your floor or something. He's gonna take a crap or something. He's got a towel

3
00:00:14,720 --> 00:00:18,760
around there that he was like don't let anyone knock it over, don't let dogs in. I was like

4
00:00:18,760 --> 00:00:22,160
well the hoover's going around, the little furagan was going around. He's like turn it

5
00:00:22,160 --> 00:00:26,160
off, turn it off. He was on the toilet earlier. So insight for people, we've already started

6
00:00:26,160 --> 00:00:33,360
by the way, insight for people that I sometimes send to our Studio 8 For group chat audios

7
00:00:33,360 --> 00:00:38,160
of T and I talking on the toilet. Have you listened to any of them? They're like quite

8
00:00:38,160 --> 00:00:42,240
long and he just goes on and yeah he suddenly had a revelation whilst on the toilet earlier

9
00:00:42,240 --> 00:00:49,120
that the furagan rumber hoover might knock over the blocks. He's like turn it off, turn

10
00:00:49,120 --> 00:00:54,800
it off. So I was like turning it off, sending it to go back and he's like oh. Oh that's

11
00:00:54,800 --> 00:01:01,320
genius. Oh bless it. So cute. At that age towers are the most important thing. It's impressive.

12
00:01:01,320 --> 00:01:04,640
You should go round and look. I will go and have a look and we'll try and get a picture

13
00:01:04,640 --> 00:01:08,720
of it as well. Dogs haven't. I've got a picture. I can show you the picture. Oh yeah, picture.

14
00:01:08,720 --> 00:01:12,600
Oh I pose it to a photo in case the dogs knocked it over and I could do a sneaky little rebuild

15
00:01:12,600 --> 00:01:16,800
of it. Nice. There he is. He built it himself. It's quite cute. That's very impressive. And

16
00:01:16,800 --> 00:01:21,240
when you open up it's got me, him and mummy inside. Oh nice. Three that he put in there.

17
00:01:21,240 --> 00:01:24,920
There's me, he needs you, there's my knee, put the roof on. Yeah very cute. Oh that's

18
00:01:24,920 --> 00:01:30,120
very cute. Okay well this is the Untied Trek show, not the Rob talking about his son on

19
00:01:30,120 --> 00:01:39,480
the toilet show. No that's another week. Before we get started, we've got some admin to do.

20
00:01:39,480 --> 00:01:45,880
Elephant in the room. What happened last week? Last episode. So Rob has learnt his lesson

21
00:01:45,880 --> 00:01:53,600
about making edits on an SD card before copying them. So in the future Rob, your workflow

22
00:01:53,600 --> 00:02:00,280
goes like this. SD card goes in. You copy the raw files. You don't change anything to

23
00:02:00,280 --> 00:02:05,560
your hard drive. You then take SD card out and you go, I predict this with my soul. Put

24
00:02:05,560 --> 00:02:11,760
it to one side and then change all the names. And I would normally do that. And for some

25
00:02:11,760 --> 00:02:17,720
reason that week I was just, I don't know, maybe it was just I felt it was off because

26
00:02:17,720 --> 00:02:21,840
they were doing it so early because we recorded super early. We did because I was going away

27
00:02:21,840 --> 00:02:27,520
on holiday so we needed to do it the week before. Now I'll be honest though, what you

28
00:02:27,520 --> 00:02:34,400
created was so much more entertaining than us talking about Picard for the second half.

29
00:02:34,400 --> 00:02:39,720
I really didn't mind. I know we had some really good points we brought up about Picard. Don't

30
00:02:39,720 --> 00:02:44,640
get me wrong. And maybe we'll talk about them in the future. But what you created was just

31
00:02:44,640 --> 00:02:48,600
fucking beautiful. I loved every second of that. I'm glad you liked it. I hope everyone

32
00:02:48,600 --> 00:02:54,720
else did. It was stressful because I felt so guilty that I, it was 22 minutes of audio

33
00:02:54,720 --> 00:03:00,480
footage and you'd offered like on two occasions that we could redo it. And I was just like,

34
00:03:00,480 --> 00:03:05,000
I just don't think it would work. I'm glad we didn't because people will have, yes, we

35
00:03:05,000 --> 00:03:11,520
would have put a Valentino in saying, oh dear, something's gone wrong and this is a re-record

36
00:03:11,520 --> 00:03:15,040
of what they previously did. And you just don't get that same energy. You don't get

37
00:03:15,040 --> 00:03:19,040
the same flow. It would have felt very different to what we had done on the night. So in the

38
00:03:19,040 --> 00:03:22,840
end, I'm kind of glad you said no to that. Yeah. Because yeah, you're right. I don't

39
00:03:22,840 --> 00:03:23,840
think it would have worked.

40
00:03:23,840 --> 00:03:28,280
But the bit where we both go on about the noise in the background, that was legitimate.

41
00:03:28,280 --> 00:03:33,360
There was a noise. And it's a toy. It's what it is. No it wasn't. It was your vacuum. Oh

42
00:03:33,360 --> 00:03:38,600
yeah. The vacuum got stuck. It was beeping. But also what you can hear on occasions, you

43
00:03:38,600 --> 00:03:46,440
hear a click, click, click in the background. Oh, okay. That's a Play-Doh dinosaur. Oh yes,

44
00:03:46,440 --> 00:03:51,240
you said. That makes a noise and it's gone funny. Oh. And it just makes a noise on its

45
00:03:51,240 --> 00:03:57,040
own. So you can, so you'll hear a glass smashing noise. I added that. Yes. But our reaction

46
00:03:57,040 --> 00:04:01,120
is the genuine reaction, which I think it works quite well. It worked really well. It

47
00:04:01,120 --> 00:04:06,400
was the best acting we've ever done. It's not acting. Exactly. It was legitimate. So

48
00:04:06,400 --> 00:04:14,000
yeah, I, long story short, I changed the name of the files on the SD card before moving

49
00:04:14,000 --> 00:04:19,600
them. And then I thought I selected every one and, but somehow didn't select one of

50
00:04:19,600 --> 00:04:24,080
the ones in the middle. I can not tell you how I didn't do it because I would either

51
00:04:24,080 --> 00:04:28,280
do select all or drag and grab them all and they're in order. So I don't know how I got

52
00:04:28,280 --> 00:04:32,640
the two after it and not that one in the middle. Well, what I don't understand is why it was

53
00:04:32,640 --> 00:04:39,080
deleted from the card either. Well, I copied them and put them all there and then I deleted

54
00:04:39,080 --> 00:04:42,140
them from the card. I actually deleted them from the card. Oh my God. You hadn't told

55
00:04:42,140 --> 00:04:46,640
me that. No, because I don't know what I just kind of like was just doing it. And then off

56
00:04:46,640 --> 00:04:53,240
I went. You never delete from the card. I've got, I have never deleted a card. What happens

57
00:04:53,240 --> 00:04:58,160
is I do the whole edit and then the card just gets put back in the bag. And then the next

58
00:04:58,160 --> 00:05:04,080
time we record, I put the card in the recorder and hit format then. Yeah. So just in case

59
00:05:04,080 --> 00:05:07,760
something goes right there. It's literally the first time I've ever done it. First time

60
00:05:07,760 --> 00:05:10,520
I've ever renamed them on there. First time I've ever deleted them off because I don't.

61
00:05:10,520 --> 00:05:13,680
I just copy paste and then I go off and do it. And it'll be the last. It'll be the last.

62
00:05:13,680 --> 00:05:20,080
Yeah. I'll be really like. It happens to others. I know there's like people out there that

63
00:05:20,080 --> 00:05:24,000
would get pissy with each other. I don't get the point of that. Shit happens. We tried

64
00:05:24,000 --> 00:05:27,880
our best to get it back and it was really weird. All I could think of was because you'd

65
00:05:27,880 --> 00:05:32,880
renamed them on the card that had done something to the file table on the card. Because when

66
00:05:32,880 --> 00:05:38,200
I was recovering it, it was saying, Oh no, this folder is really good. You can recover

67
00:05:38,200 --> 00:05:44,120
it. No problem. And then recovering it, it then would change to yellow and go, no, it's

68
00:05:44,120 --> 00:05:48,840
not so good. And then listening to it, it would, you'd think, Oh, are we going to get

69
00:05:48,840 --> 00:05:54,320
away with this? And then all of a sudden it would be, yeah. Hello. Yeah.

70
00:05:54,320 --> 00:06:02,760
No, that's fucked. That's exactly the experience I had. We must be using the same recover.

71
00:06:02,760 --> 00:06:09,880
No, I used, um, Oh God, what is it called? I used a different one on, um, Mac OS that's

72
00:06:09,880 --> 00:06:14,520
all command line, but, uh, but we got the same result. Same result. Exactly the same

73
00:06:14,520 --> 00:06:21,680
result. Disc drill. That's the one I use. Yeah. So it meant that because with the shit

74
00:06:21,680 --> 00:06:26,320
show stuff, I'd planned two episodes before Christmas because there's stuff that we want

75
00:06:26,320 --> 00:06:29,880
to do at Christmas. I'm not spoiling it, but I needed to get the plot there and I needed

76
00:06:29,880 --> 00:06:36,200
two episodes to do it. But things that come out in that shit show for anyone that's bothered,

77
00:06:36,200 --> 00:06:43,080
the stuff with, with Adam's character, uh, was our plan for a long time, wasn't it? We

78
00:06:43,080 --> 00:06:48,040
were going to have him as actually not be the whipping boy, but actually he was like

79
00:06:48,040 --> 00:06:54,520
this super intelligent agent guy. It was really kind of, at one point he was going to be the

80
00:06:54,520 --> 00:06:58,680
super baddie. You've, we'd have heard the Ferengi's talk about the broker. And the time

81
00:06:58,680 --> 00:07:04,200
I wrote that that was going to be Adam's character. Or in fact, long time ago, we even decided

82
00:07:04,200 --> 00:07:10,200
we're toying with him being a certain God-like character of didn't we? Yeah. We had, he was

83
00:07:10,200 --> 00:07:14,840
always going to be the something, but then we eventually, after we really enjoyed those

84
00:07:14,840 --> 00:07:20,400
two, um, agents that sounds like, okay, we've got to do something with this. And then that's

85
00:07:20,400 --> 00:07:25,480
why Adam became this thing, but it was always going to be something. It just sped it massively

86
00:07:25,480 --> 00:07:32,080
along. Yeah. But you know what? Sometimes that's for a good reason. And actually it's

87
00:07:32,080 --> 00:07:35,520
lined us up nicely. We're being ready to do something for Christmas, which we weren't

88
00:07:35,520 --> 00:07:40,120
expecting to do, which we are now going to do. So yeah, no spoilers, but it has actually

89
00:07:40,120 --> 00:07:45,800
lined up quite nicely. Yeah, exactly. So yeah, sorry about last week, but I think it was

90
00:07:45,800 --> 00:07:53,280
quite good in the end really. It happened. It was phenomenal. Enter authorization code.

91
00:07:53,280 --> 00:07:59,160
Right. As usual, what you've been watching. Well, I was going to say, we've got kind of

92
00:07:59,160 --> 00:08:05,080
another thing in the room. What have we both been watching? Not discovery. Oh yeah. Not

93
00:08:05,080 --> 00:08:11,280
discovery. Okay. Yeah. Slight change of plan. Neither of us got around to watching discovery.

94
00:08:11,280 --> 00:08:16,680
And I was it yesterday. I sent a voice note to you saying like, I've not been that fussed

95
00:08:16,680 --> 00:08:20,040
about watching. Oh yeah. I've not been that fussed about watching an episode. I know I

96
00:08:20,040 --> 00:08:24,560
don't like. Yeah. So we've had a little play. So we'll tell you about that in a moment.

97
00:08:24,560 --> 00:08:28,920
What have I watched this week? I'm not going to say not much because I have been watching

98
00:08:28,920 --> 00:08:33,960
quite a bit, but sci-fi wise, the only thing that's probably of note is I finally got around

99
00:08:33,960 --> 00:08:39,840
to watching Alien Romulus. After having it booked, Kay had an accident with her water

100
00:08:39,840 --> 00:08:44,480
bottle and it was her favorite water bottle. And basically the long and short of it, Nanny

101
00:08:44,480 --> 00:08:49,960
handed it to her. She thought she had it. Nanny thought she had it. So she dropped it

102
00:08:49,960 --> 00:08:54,120
and it smashed the bottom out of the water bottle, destroyed. And she had this really

103
00:08:54,120 --> 00:08:58,440
stiff upper lip, really good girl, got in the car, drove home from Nanny's and said,

104
00:08:58,440 --> 00:09:04,800
are you being very quiet? Are you okay? Was it like a pattern or something? No, it was

105
00:09:04,800 --> 00:09:10,760
just this big chunky pink water bottle. There's like 1.5 liters and she just grown very attached

106
00:09:10,760 --> 00:09:15,000
to it because she, we tell her she's got to drink a lot of water and it was big, which

107
00:09:15,000 --> 00:09:19,880
meant she only needed to refill it once most days. And she could see how much she'd drunk

108
00:09:19,880 --> 00:09:27,040
and anyone that's vaguely neuro spicy will understand why that becomes an important thing.

109
00:09:27,040 --> 00:09:32,560
So obviously I was like, oh crap, my films in 30 minutes. I'd scheduled to get you home,

110
00:09:32,560 --> 00:09:35,560
get you into bed and then get straight on the road and make it just as maybe the ads

111
00:09:35,560 --> 00:09:40,880
are playing. No, it's dad point time, right? Let's go to Tesco and see if we can, I couldn't

112
00:09:40,880 --> 00:09:44,360
find one that she wanted anyway. And we ended up buying it on Amazon. So it came the next

113
00:09:44,360 --> 00:09:48,800
day, but that's why I then missed it. So I then booked it for the next night instead.

114
00:09:48,800 --> 00:09:58,440
And I'm so glad I did. It was, it wasn't perfect. I'm going to do a bonus episode for the variety

115
00:09:58,440 --> 00:10:03,000
show where I just walk and talk about it and it will be full of spoilers. So if you don't

116
00:10:03,000 --> 00:10:06,600
want to know about it, it's probably not the one you should listen to. And I'm not going

117
00:10:06,600 --> 00:10:09,720
to do too many spoilers here. In fact, I'm not going to do any spoilers. Don't do any

118
00:10:09,720 --> 00:10:17,760
spoilers here. All I've got to say about is the scenery and the design of the world was

119
00:10:17,760 --> 00:10:22,040
perfect straight out of the 79 movie in the eighties film. So straight out of alien and

120
00:10:22,040 --> 00:10:31,200
aliens. Unfortunately, they tried to do fan service, which just was not required. And

121
00:10:31,200 --> 00:10:36,680
there's one point in the film that's just like, why did you even do that? That is so

122
00:10:36,680 --> 00:10:44,040
cheesy and unrequited, not required at all. And the last 15 minutes is a complete jump

123
00:10:44,040 --> 00:10:51,080
the shark, which is a shame because the rest of it up until that point is really good.

124
00:10:51,080 --> 00:11:00,120
Really, really good. It feels not quite a perfect sequel to alien and prequel to aliens,

125
00:11:00,120 --> 00:11:06,200
but it definitely didn't feel like it. It didn't not feel like it didn't belong. If

126
00:11:06,200 --> 00:11:10,000
God, there's so many double negatives in that it felt like it belonged. That would actually

127
00:11:10,000 --> 00:11:17,240
be the right way to say shit like that. It felt like it belonged. And yeah, I think that's

128
00:11:17,240 --> 00:11:24,080
all I can really, it felt like it belonged. And the thing is they even tried really hard

129
00:11:24,080 --> 00:11:33,240
to kind of tie in Prometheus and covenant into it as well, which kind of leads to the

130
00:11:33,240 --> 00:11:38,360
jumping the shark at the end and weirdly also kind of almost fan service. He sort of steals

131
00:11:38,360 --> 00:11:45,760
a chunk from resurrection as well. Really? Yeah, it's all a little bit odd, but I would

132
00:11:45,760 --> 00:11:49,080
watch it. I'm going to watch it again. I'm probably going to add it to my collection

133
00:11:49,080 --> 00:11:55,200
of the DVD. So I've got all of them. Is it the best? Absolutely no way, no way near.

134
00:11:55,200 --> 00:12:01,040
But is it worth seeing? 100% Yes. I was going to say, did you go into it expecting

135
00:12:01,040 --> 00:12:05,640
a certain thing from it or did you read my mind? I had to go in open minded because if

136
00:12:05,640 --> 00:12:09,880
I went in there expecting something as good as alien aliens, I would have walked out there

137
00:12:09,880 --> 00:12:15,520
disappointed and knowing what I've seen now, I would have been a hundred percent disappointed.

138
00:12:15,520 --> 00:12:23,400
But going in there with not an open heart, but the open mind to say, I know this is not

139
00:12:23,400 --> 00:12:29,160
going to be anywhere near the original two films, but with Ridley Scott behind it, there's

140
00:12:29,160 --> 00:12:37,600
a good chance it's going to be salvageable or good. I walked away happy. But if I'd gone

141
00:12:37,600 --> 00:12:42,200
in there thinking this is going to be a phenomenal entry to the alien series, I would have come

142
00:12:42,200 --> 00:12:49,720
away disappointed just like I did from Prometheus and from Covenant. Again, hate's a strong

143
00:12:49,720 --> 00:12:56,240
word. Prometheus, I've gone back and watched again several times and I can just about kind

144
00:12:56,240 --> 00:13:04,680
of accept it. It's not terrible. Covenant on the other hand, it just wasn't required.

145
00:13:04,680 --> 00:13:09,840
I've got to say, I've seen them. Don't remember very much about them other than Fassbender.

146
00:13:09,840 --> 00:13:15,640
Yeah. I mean, Covenant really just didn't feel like it was required. Prometheus, it

147
00:13:15,640 --> 00:13:24,880
could have been so much better as it is and tying it in with Alien Romulus. Actually,

148
00:13:24,880 --> 00:13:31,440
they did a good job and helped make that story matter a little bit more.

149
00:13:31,440 --> 00:13:35,480
Is Romulus the ship?

150
00:13:35,480 --> 00:13:48,560
It's a whole mythology from Roman times, Romulus and Remus. They suckled at a wolf, I believe

151
00:13:48,560 --> 00:13:55,920
the story is. The teat of a wolf. The space station involved, half of it is called Romulus,

152
00:13:55,920 --> 00:14:02,080
the other half is Remus. Again, I can't go into too much because it does kind of spoil

153
00:14:02,080 --> 00:14:08,400
it for you. Suffice to say, the ad doesn't ruin it, surprisingly. It's actually left

154
00:14:08,400 --> 00:14:16,600
quite a lot out for once. I would go into it, but that's pretty much all of the sci-fi

155
00:14:16,600 --> 00:14:18,040
stuff I've seen.

156
00:14:18,040 --> 00:14:19,040
Any monkeys in it?

157
00:14:19,040 --> 00:14:20,040
No monkeys.

158
00:14:20,040 --> 00:14:21,040
How supernatural?

159
00:14:21,040 --> 00:14:22,040
Season three, episode eight.

160
00:14:22,040 --> 00:14:23,040
Still going then.

161
00:14:23,040 --> 00:14:33,080
I checked it, we were literally watching it before you go in. It was a really good episode.

162
00:14:33,080 --> 00:14:38,520
It was a Christmas one, a supernatural Christmas.

163
00:14:38,520 --> 00:14:44,520
That exists? It sounds such a bullshit name.

164
00:14:44,520 --> 00:14:49,400
It was all about the two...

165
00:14:49,400 --> 00:14:50,400
The brothers?

166
00:14:50,400 --> 00:14:57,480
Yes, these two brothers and they kill monsters. These two Celtic, that kind of old gods.

167
00:14:57,480 --> 00:14:59,600
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.

168
00:14:59,600 --> 00:15:04,540
And about the old lords of Christmas. They sacrifice people to these gods and they give

169
00:15:04,540 --> 00:15:10,680
you a mild weather at Christmas. They're so well acted by these two older people, being

170
00:15:10,680 --> 00:15:18,000
really 60s slash 70s perfect home people.

171
00:15:18,000 --> 00:15:19,000
Okay, yeah.

172
00:15:19,000 --> 00:15:24,720
They're just beautifully acted and then the brothers get tortured, get a fingernail pulled

173
00:15:24,720 --> 00:15:29,480
off. Oh, it's so grim because it's such a stark contrast between the two elements of

174
00:15:29,480 --> 00:15:39,760
the show. Really hyper gory violence and proper super fun Christmas right there happening

175
00:15:39,760 --> 00:15:44,720
at the same time. Oops, banged the mic. Yeah, good episode. Yeah, we're watching a lot of

176
00:15:44,720 --> 00:15:48,120
Supernatural still. I have been playing a few games.

177
00:15:48,120 --> 00:15:49,120
Okay.

178
00:15:49,120 --> 00:15:50,120
So I've got...

179
00:15:50,120 --> 00:15:55,160
I haven't turned the PlayStation on or the Xbox on in three weeks.

180
00:15:55,160 --> 00:15:59,440
The Xbox went on the other day just to... I wanted to update it. That was the only reason.

181
00:15:59,440 --> 00:16:04,760
I'll leave mine on that weird standby mode they created so it stays up to date. In fact,

182
00:16:04,760 --> 00:16:07,160
the Xbox probably hasn't been on for a couple of months.

183
00:16:07,160 --> 00:16:10,080
I turned that off on mine because they're in a cupboard now.

184
00:16:10,080 --> 00:16:11,080
Ah, they're toasty.

185
00:16:11,080 --> 00:16:18,080
And they will get too hot. So if I play them, I leave the doors on it open. So I was playing

186
00:16:18,080 --> 00:16:19,080
Elden Ring.

187
00:16:19,080 --> 00:16:20,080
Yeah.

188
00:16:20,080 --> 00:16:28,200
I've stopped playing that bit. It's so stressful. I absolutely think the game is fantastic,

189
00:16:28,200 --> 00:16:34,360
but I am not good enough. There's no amount that I can practice and practice that will

190
00:16:34,360 --> 00:16:40,080
get me good enough now. I think I'm just past that point. Does that make sense?

191
00:16:40,080 --> 00:16:41,080
Yeah. I know what you mean.

192
00:16:41,080 --> 00:16:44,200
I can't see the moves coming from the enemies. I just can't judge what they're doing.

193
00:16:44,200 --> 00:16:45,200
You're not good enough at working out the patterns.

194
00:16:45,200 --> 00:16:52,480
I'm not quick enough. I just... I want to be able to sit down and if I play a game for

195
00:16:52,480 --> 00:16:56,920
an hour, feel like I've progressed, whereas I can be fighting a boss on there for four

196
00:16:56,920 --> 00:16:57,920
nights.

197
00:16:57,920 --> 00:16:58,920
Oh no.

198
00:16:58,920 --> 00:17:00,920
And when your four nights is across two weeks...

199
00:17:00,920 --> 00:17:02,360
Yeah, I can't do that.

200
00:17:02,360 --> 00:17:07,480
I just... It takes it away. People complain online about, oh, we don't put easy modes

201
00:17:07,480 --> 00:17:14,360
in our Souls-like games. No, for me, can you put an easy mode in Elden Ring? So if I had

202
00:17:14,360 --> 00:17:18,280
it on the computer, I'd put a mod on so I had infinite health.

203
00:17:18,280 --> 00:17:23,800
It's funny you say about computers. I'm genuinely at that point that I'm almost tempted to get

204
00:17:23,800 --> 00:17:29,800
rid of the consoles and go back to PC gaming. There's so little appeared on the gaming market

205
00:17:29,800 --> 00:17:37,040
that I would like to buy and I looked at the back catalog for both of them for Game Pass

206
00:17:37,040 --> 00:17:42,320
and for whatever the PlayStation 1 is called. Gold. And there's nothing I really want on

207
00:17:42,320 --> 00:17:45,640
either of them, to be honest. And I was just thinking, you're just sitting there not doing

208
00:17:45,640 --> 00:17:46,640
anything.

209
00:17:46,640 --> 00:17:51,400
Well, I need to cancel my Xbox subscription because I'm not played it. It's like, yeah,

210
00:17:51,400 --> 00:17:55,400
I've got access to all these games, but I can just, when I want to play one, just start

211
00:17:55,400 --> 00:17:58,680
the sub up again. It's not like I'm going to lose anything because I haven't played

212
00:17:58,680 --> 00:18:02,160
it in probably, I don't even remember.

213
00:18:02,160 --> 00:18:03,160
Well, this is it.

214
00:18:03,160 --> 00:18:04,160
Months and months and months.

215
00:18:04,160 --> 00:18:09,200
But this is why I'm thinking, do I get rid of it and just go for a gaming PC? But then

216
00:18:09,200 --> 00:18:14,000
I'd be like, then I'd have to go and get out the top graphics and I wouldn't be able to

217
00:18:14,000 --> 00:18:19,600
stop myself trying to max it out. And then in six months time, we all know what happens.

218
00:18:19,600 --> 00:18:24,480
It's now at the bottom of the pile and it's, I've got to improve it, don't I?

219
00:18:24,480 --> 00:18:29,720
I'm not going to get rid of my consoles because I collect them. So I won't be trading a console

220
00:18:29,720 --> 00:18:37,960
in or just selling one. Once I've got one, I keep it. But I moved from that and then

221
00:18:37,960 --> 00:18:42,080
I started playing a really good game, which I've paused because we're going to stream.

222
00:18:42,080 --> 00:18:45,080
Oh yes, I'm looking forward to this.

223
00:18:45,080 --> 00:18:46,080
Thank goodness you're here.

224
00:18:46,080 --> 00:18:51,840
Crikey, look at the size of this lad's Mara. Andy's got a huge car.

225
00:18:51,840 --> 00:18:57,920
And it's so, it's right up our alley. Honestly, it's like, it's so funny. I've played it for

226
00:18:57,920 --> 00:19:06,760
about half an hour, saw it originally from what's wrong with Rolfi. They reviewed it

227
00:19:06,760 --> 00:19:10,440
and I read their review and I was like, oh, this looks really cool. I like the art style,

228
00:19:10,440 --> 00:19:11,440
very cartoony.

229
00:19:11,440 --> 00:19:15,600
It's by the same people that did the Untitled Goose Game, which was one of my favourite

230
00:19:15,600 --> 00:19:17,160
games of a couple of years ago.

231
00:19:17,160 --> 00:19:20,480
Yeah, we loved that, didn't we? We spoke about the podcast a little bit.

232
00:19:20,480 --> 00:19:25,760
Possibly. Yeah, I remember we recorded one night and then watched Soviet Womble.

233
00:19:25,760 --> 00:19:27,680
Yeah, that was so funny.

234
00:19:27,680 --> 00:19:28,680
With his additional animation.

235
00:19:28,680 --> 00:19:33,080
We finished the podcast really late and then we watched like a half an hour YouTube video

236
00:19:33,080 --> 00:19:38,960
of a guy playing it. Soviet Womble is hilarious, by the way, if anyone's into watching gaming

237
00:19:38,960 --> 00:19:46,720
YouTubers. So yes, by then it's all like heavy, I think it's Yorkshire accent.

238
00:19:46,720 --> 00:19:48,040
It is, it's Yorkshire.

239
00:19:48,040 --> 00:19:53,080
You can turn it on or off, so I turn it on obviously. The very first thing it comes up

240
00:19:53,080 --> 00:19:58,680
with is that it says something to you, I don't remember now, and then you've got two options.

241
00:19:58,680 --> 00:20:03,840
The one on the left, which I'm assuming is like, yes, is written in slang.

242
00:20:03,840 --> 00:20:04,840
Right.

243
00:20:04,840 --> 00:20:07,880
And the one on the right is written in normal English. So of course I'm going to take the

244
00:20:07,880 --> 00:20:12,880
slang one. So I don't know what difference that makes, but at the moment everyone talks

245
00:20:12,880 --> 00:20:15,040
beautifully and it's hilarious.

246
00:20:15,040 --> 00:20:19,200
So the only things you can do is jump and slap.

247
00:20:19,200 --> 00:20:20,200
Yes.

248
00:20:20,200 --> 00:20:23,560
That's your interaction with the entire world. So you want to talk to someone, you want to

249
00:20:23,560 --> 00:20:29,680
slap them in the ass. There was a, there was a, don't go too much, I went up, walked past

250
00:20:29,680 --> 00:20:32,920
a fence and there was a little hole in the fence and someone's just pushing, pushing

251
00:20:32,920 --> 00:20:33,920
sausages.

252
00:20:33,920 --> 00:20:35,920
I was like, this is brilliant.

253
00:20:35,920 --> 00:20:39,640
Oh, I know I've run out of sausages. I'll go get some more.

254
00:20:39,640 --> 00:20:44,080
Yeah, it's so funny. Just these cute little things. And I was like, and then you said

255
00:20:44,080 --> 00:20:47,840
that you wanted to, I was like, okay, right. I'm going to pause this. I don't want to get

256
00:20:47,840 --> 00:20:53,680
too far. So I want to be able to see bit. I've got enough in it that I know I can explain

257
00:20:53,680 --> 00:20:54,680
to you what's going on.

258
00:20:54,680 --> 00:20:55,680
Right.

259
00:20:55,680 --> 00:20:57,800
And then we can enjoy, watch like a couple of hours together.

260
00:20:57,800 --> 00:21:01,400
I think we need to make that soon then because I don't want you waiting on a game just because

261
00:21:01,400 --> 00:21:05,680
I've asked you to. So let's make that soon then because that's, that's a hundred percent

262
00:21:05,680 --> 00:21:06,680
worth it.

263
00:21:06,680 --> 00:21:10,000
And then I've finally started playing Final Fantasy Rebirth properly now.

264
00:21:10,000 --> 00:21:11,000
Finally.

265
00:21:11,000 --> 00:21:13,800
Finally, final, final, final, finally, final.

266
00:21:13,800 --> 00:21:19,400
And what you'll notice, ladies and gents, is that that game that we used to play lots

267
00:21:19,400 --> 00:21:22,640
and lots doesn't feature in our lives anymore.

268
00:21:22,640 --> 00:21:29,680
Oh dear. I promised myself I wouldn't do this. I said, Valentino, you are a strong and beautiful

269
00:21:29,680 --> 00:21:35,080
woman. You don't need to get involved. Live your life. Just stick to the script. Get your

270
00:21:35,080 --> 00:21:41,400
money. But these two, they had to drone on about fucking hell divers for a full 11 minutes

271
00:21:41,400 --> 00:21:49,120
on a Star Trek podcast, a Star Trek podcast. I tell you, look, do yourself a favor, skip

272
00:21:49,120 --> 00:21:53,480
ahead. You don't need this in your life. I know I don't.

273
00:21:53,480 --> 00:22:00,080
No, I logged in a couple of days ago, collected 150 medals.

274
00:22:00,080 --> 00:22:01,080
Yeah.

275
00:22:01,080 --> 00:22:05,840
So and then I turned it off. I didn't actually even spend them. I should have spent them

276
00:22:05,840 --> 00:22:08,960
because if I log in again, I've probably got another hundred. It will max you out to 250

277
00:22:08,960 --> 00:22:10,600
and then you won't get any.

278
00:22:10,600 --> 00:22:18,160
The problem is they fucked about too much with it. And for me, it got boring. Though

279
00:22:18,160 --> 00:22:25,440
I was enjoying our sessions and then we turn it on and suddenly my weapon loadout that

280
00:22:25,440 --> 00:22:32,440
I was really super comfortable with and had fun with is ruined. We have exactly the same

281
00:22:32,440 --> 00:22:39,680
missions going on that we had at the very beginning of the game, still going on and

282
00:22:39,680 --> 00:22:44,240
botched weapons to work with instead. And it's just, why do you keep doing this?

283
00:22:44,240 --> 00:22:49,120
The thing is, if anyone ever played with me, they'll know I loved the flamethrower. I chose

284
00:22:49,120 --> 00:22:55,680
it. I had napalm grenades, I had the napalm bomb drop thing. I used the flamethrower all

285
00:22:55,680 --> 00:23:01,240
the time. I loved the fire. Then they did that massive update and the war bond that

286
00:23:01,240 --> 00:23:05,520
came with it was a fire one. I was like, oh, this is going to be so good. So now I could

287
00:23:05,520 --> 00:23:10,320
have a sidearm, which is a flamethrower. So I can have the big flamethrower, a sidearm

288
00:23:10,320 --> 00:23:15,080
flamethrower and an assault rifle, which is a flamethrower. So every single one of my

289
00:23:15,080 --> 00:23:23,400
weapons could be a flamethrower. Brilliant. They nerfed fire. So barely does it. You can't

290
00:23:23,400 --> 00:23:30,200
damage bar titans with it. No, it barely does any damage now, even if you hit a charger

291
00:23:30,200 --> 00:23:36,240
from the rear with fire. And then they did another update and it broke the flamethrower

292
00:23:36,240 --> 00:23:40,840
even further to the point where everyone doesn't use it anymore because it's useless. And like,

293
00:23:40,840 --> 00:23:48,240
well, the one weapon that I loved more than anything, I now can't use. And they made all

294
00:23:48,240 --> 00:23:52,480
the really good guns have less magazines. So I feel like I've got to have the pack

295
00:23:52,480 --> 00:24:00,040
on my back. So then that stops me using other things, other strategies I might want to do.

296
00:24:00,040 --> 00:24:06,600
And yeah, I just, they've made it on a shit engine. We spoke about it before. There's

297
00:24:06,600 --> 00:24:14,960
an engine that is really old. They don't support it anymore. It's by its own Autodesk, Maya,

298
00:24:14,960 --> 00:24:20,240
if you remember that software. It's that engine for that. And just like, I wish you just made

299
00:24:20,240 --> 00:24:25,200
it in Unreal, Unreal four or something. And then you could have upgraded it to five and

300
00:24:25,200 --> 00:24:29,000
it would have looked brilliant. It wouldn't change anything. And, but things would just

301
00:24:29,000 --> 00:24:32,400
work and it would be supported. And every time you make one change, it's not going to

302
00:24:32,400 --> 00:24:36,800
make some catastrophic change that you could butterfly effect further down the road on

303
00:24:36,800 --> 00:24:39,840
something that has got no relation to what you've changed.

304
00:24:39,840 --> 00:24:43,560
Yeah. I mean, I'm just looking here at an article from about 11 hours ago, allegedly

305
00:24:43,560 --> 00:24:49,320
on games radar, which I didn't realise was still a thing. They've now confirmed that

306
00:24:49,320 --> 00:24:54,600
they are building a test server. They said they already had one. I'm pretty sure. Well,

307
00:24:54,600 --> 00:24:59,160
the games directors finally confirmed that a test server is being worked on at Arrowhead

308
00:24:59,160 --> 00:25:05,000
and for the users they invite a NDA will be forced upon them if they wish to take part

309
00:25:05,000 --> 00:25:12,120
in the test, which is understandable because they're sick of things being leaked. But what

310
00:25:12,120 --> 00:25:15,840
I was actually looking for was the article that I read about three or four days ago.

311
00:25:15,840 --> 00:25:19,120
And this has only got a little bit of it, which is elsewhere in the discord question

312
00:25:19,120 --> 00:25:23,720
and answer pile stead, which is one of the lead developers, I think, or the creator and

313
00:25:23,720 --> 00:25:29,360
whatever said that criticism of helldivers too was perfectly valid of late following

314
00:25:29,360 --> 00:25:35,560
a patch earlier this month that actively nerfed fire based weapons again, which players were

315
00:25:35,560 --> 00:25:40,520
absolutely loving up until then. The worst thing would have been if we fucked up and

316
00:25:40,520 --> 00:25:46,680
no one cared. Pile stead added. So at least it's not all bad news then. No, but it has

317
00:25:46,680 --> 00:25:51,400
stopped a huge number of people I know, including us from playing it now because I'm sick of

318
00:25:51,400 --> 00:25:56,240
these updates and I know this hour we're building a test server. Great. What if you've got the

319
00:25:56,240 --> 00:26:02,960
wrong people testing it? Yeah, that's the problem, isn't it? You can't just go about

320
00:26:02,960 --> 00:26:10,760
unless the weapon is truly bugged. So let's say you had the flamethrower and they didn't

321
00:26:10,760 --> 00:26:16,720
realize that if you used three canisters in a row, suddenly you blew up and got launched

322
00:26:16,720 --> 00:26:24,720
across the map. Fine. That is a bug. Fix it. Don't go and do an update and go, right. We've

323
00:26:24,720 --> 00:26:30,960
adjusted all the weapons to make them fairer. No. If that's how you've put it out, that's

324
00:26:30,960 --> 00:26:36,160
how you've put it out. Leave it alone. It's not like we're playing against other players.

325
00:26:36,160 --> 00:26:45,600
It's because it's a very vocal, small minority of people at the very top who won't let you

326
00:26:45,600 --> 00:26:50,120
in their group and they should bring the exact perfect weapons. Whereas the majority, like

327
00:26:50,120 --> 00:26:59,480
the 90% of the rest of us, who just want to pick whatever gun we want. Apparently on the

328
00:26:59,480 --> 00:27:05,240
box, I've got it digitally so I haven't seen the box, it says something like play with

329
00:27:05,240 --> 00:27:11,440
overpowered weapons and feel like a god. It says something like that. It hasn't felt like

330
00:27:11,440 --> 00:27:17,840
that since launch. No. They've absolutely taken that away from us. What's the harm in

331
00:27:17,840 --> 00:27:21,600
making the weapons overpowered? What's the harm in giving us more ammunition? That's

332
00:27:21,600 --> 00:27:27,360
what I'm saying. If it was PVP, fine. I understand that. I hated, and that's one of the reasons

333
00:27:27,360 --> 00:27:33,600
I stopped playing COD, I hated day one being, right, brilliant. I've just about afforded

334
00:27:33,600 --> 00:27:38,920
a new game. Let's not lie, they're expensive and people need to take that into consideration.

335
00:27:38,920 --> 00:27:45,400
It's not like, oh, I'm going to buy this game and that's pocket money. It's not pocket money.

336
00:27:45,400 --> 00:27:49,480
Some of us have to save up money for that sort of thing, even as adults. I've ordered

337
00:27:49,480 --> 00:27:54,560
COD let's say. I sit down and I play it. Really fancy a multiplayer game. Day one, servers

338
00:27:54,560 --> 00:28:00,040
have been live for what, an hour? You walk in and immediately you get destroyed because

339
00:28:00,040 --> 00:28:06,040
there's 70 million other kids out there who haven't got money worries, have bought all

340
00:28:06,040 --> 00:28:13,880
the day one DLC and been given lots of bonus super powerful weapons. That pisses me off.

341
00:28:13,880 --> 00:28:21,080
I understand that, but Helldivers 2 is not PVP. The computer's not sat there going, it's

342
00:28:21,080 --> 00:28:26,520
unfair. It's bullying me. No, it's a fucking computer. It doesn't care how strong the weapons

343
00:28:26,520 --> 00:28:27,520
are.

344
00:28:27,520 --> 00:28:31,060
You find it too easy, go up a difficulty. It had seven difficulty levels.

345
00:28:31,060 --> 00:28:35,640
Which exactly what we did. We all started. I remember me and you were really tough going

346
00:28:35,640 --> 00:28:40,360
around going, oh look, we've got 10 samples on this map. That's really cool. Then a month

347
00:28:40,360 --> 00:28:44,800
later it's like we're playing difficulty level. We've got five samples. I've got three super

348
00:28:44,800 --> 00:28:49,800
samples. I'm well happy with it. Because we moved up and it didn't detract from the game

349
00:28:49,800 --> 00:28:54,400
for us. We felt like we were at that stage, but now the weapons are completely nerfed.

350
00:28:54,400 --> 00:28:57,400
You want to go back to the early levels, but you can't go back to the early levels if you

351
00:28:57,400 --> 00:29:00,760
want to progress your ship or get further weapons because you can't get the things you

352
00:29:00,760 --> 00:29:05,800
need. But then if you go to the levels for the things that you need, it's absolutely

353
00:29:05,800 --> 00:29:13,240
miserable. I remember the last time we played, it was not fun. We were really stressed because

354
00:29:13,240 --> 00:29:17,800
it just hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of things get swarming us. Our weapons were

355
00:29:17,800 --> 00:29:19,800
doing fuck all.

356
00:29:19,800 --> 00:29:24,200
Because we started playing it after they did the update where they said, when you have

357
00:29:24,200 --> 00:29:30,560
less people, we're making more spawns. Because they wanted to encourage people to play as

358
00:29:30,560 --> 00:29:31,560
groups of four.

359
00:29:31,560 --> 00:29:33,160
But why? I don't want to.

360
00:29:33,160 --> 00:29:36,560
Yeah, why? Well, you should scale it up the more people there are.

361
00:29:36,560 --> 00:29:37,560
Yes.

362
00:29:37,560 --> 00:29:39,560
Let people play on their own. Because I played a lot of time on my own.

363
00:29:39,560 --> 00:29:40,560
I did.

364
00:29:40,560 --> 00:29:43,080
Because I don't want to play with randoms. Because then you see all these videos about

365
00:29:43,080 --> 00:29:46,360
people playing with randoms and then they get to the end of the match and just boot

366
00:29:46,360 --> 00:29:47,360
them out at the death of the game.

367
00:29:47,360 --> 00:29:53,160
But you see that starts to stink of, pardon me, that starts to stink of Arrowhead going,

368
00:29:53,160 --> 00:29:59,600
oh crap. If we have lots of people just playing one player, that's server space that's being

369
00:29:59,600 --> 00:30:06,120
used up that we need another three players in with them to make that server value worthwhile.

370
00:30:06,120 --> 00:30:11,960
So I'm like, no, sorry. If you make a game possible to play on your own, leave it as

371
00:30:11,960 --> 00:30:13,720
being able to play it on your own.

372
00:30:13,720 --> 00:30:18,720
Yeah. Shame. Because really, I mean, even that game, you could be completely single

373
00:30:18,720 --> 00:30:23,560
player really. Just take it off offline. You could easily do it. But one last thing on

374
00:30:23,560 --> 00:30:30,240
it, it's quite a funny thing going on at the moment where the robots have got one section

375
00:30:30,240 --> 00:30:33,160
away from super earth. They're now one section away.

376
00:30:33,160 --> 00:30:36,000
Oh are they? Because the last time I heard they'd only got one planet.

377
00:30:36,000 --> 00:30:41,440
No, they're like one segment away from being in the orbit of super earth. And there's a

378
00:30:41,440 --> 00:30:49,320
big thing on Reddit saying, let them do it. So there was a mission that came out where

379
00:30:49,320 --> 00:30:53,600
they were telling you to go over and stop them. And everyone was like, no, we're going

380
00:30:53,600 --> 00:30:58,800
to do this without even trying because now you can see like each planet had like a regeneration

381
00:30:58,800 --> 00:31:04,640
rate of the enemy and it had been put at the lowest lowest number for like those planets

382
00:31:04,640 --> 00:31:08,480
in there. It's like, we're going to do this without even trying. All the people that aren't

383
00:31:08,480 --> 00:31:11,120
on Reddit are going to do it and we're not going to help them. They'll still manage it

384
00:31:11,120 --> 00:31:14,480
because it's just going to be too easy. But yeah, there's a lot of people and they're

385
00:31:14,480 --> 00:31:17,240
like, let's see if they've made super earth. Can we?

386
00:31:17,240 --> 00:31:21,840
I was going to say, can you imagine if everyone actually just stopped playing and no, go on,

387
00:31:21,840 --> 00:31:26,280
show us what happens if we've got to go super earth. That would destroy the game because

388
00:31:26,280 --> 00:31:28,720
I can guarantee you they have not got that created.

389
00:31:28,720 --> 00:31:31,400
They've not got it created, no. Because they never thought people would.

390
00:31:31,400 --> 00:31:35,480
No, but that's because they've upset too many people. I think genuinely if it got to super

391
00:31:35,480 --> 00:31:39,720
earth, they'd probably just say, server off time, sorry, game's over.

392
00:31:39,720 --> 00:31:44,440
Yeah, or restart it or they would do what they're doing now. They get to a point where

393
00:31:44,440 --> 00:31:49,720
they'll just pretend that you're on the back foot, stopping it from getting in.

394
00:31:49,720 --> 00:31:55,840
What will happen? What will happen is it will get super earth and don't worry, super earth

395
00:31:55,840 --> 00:32:01,400
develops a super weapon just in time. Or that's when they'd introduce the next race and it

396
00:32:01,400 --> 00:32:05,320
would be some sort of meteorite that would go across the universe, destroying all the

397
00:32:05,320 --> 00:32:11,240
planets nearest super earth for the bots and then build itself at the south of the map.

398
00:32:11,240 --> 00:32:13,160
But yeah, you're right. They'll never let that happen.

399
00:32:13,160 --> 00:32:19,320
I think they're, let's say, at a fair shake, two or three months late bringing out the

400
00:32:19,320 --> 00:32:20,320
new faction.

401
00:32:20,320 --> 00:32:21,320
Yeah.

402
00:32:21,320 --> 00:32:26,440
Because I think had it been two or three months ago, the four of us would have gone, I've

403
00:32:26,440 --> 00:32:28,080
still got enough interest.

404
00:32:28,080 --> 00:32:29,560
I've got no interest in it now.

405
00:32:29,560 --> 00:32:36,160
Whereas now if they released it, I'd be like, maybe TJ and I will play it at some point.

406
00:32:36,160 --> 00:32:41,080
Let the bugs get out first. We'll let them release all this shit and we'll come back

407
00:32:41,080 --> 00:32:44,440
in a month when potentially the bugs have been sorted.

408
00:32:44,440 --> 00:32:50,960
I will start playing it when my TikTok or my Twister or my threads feed starts saying,

409
00:32:50,960 --> 00:32:52,440
they haven't fucked it up.

410
00:32:52,440 --> 00:32:53,440
Yeah.

411
00:32:53,440 --> 00:32:59,200
And at the moment it's daily I see posts saying, what have they done? So that will be when

412
00:32:59,200 --> 00:33:00,200
I do it.

413
00:33:00,200 --> 00:33:02,800
See, wasn't worth it, was it?

414
00:33:02,800 --> 00:33:04,000
Should we talk something about Star Trek?

415
00:33:04,000 --> 00:33:09,720
We probably should, yeah.

416
00:33:09,720 --> 00:33:14,720
So this is supposedly a Star Trek podcast. So let's talk something about Star Trek.

417
00:33:14,720 --> 00:33:15,720
Star Trek Roulette.

418
00:33:15,720 --> 00:33:20,640
Well, firstly, we'll tell you how we haven't watched Star Trek. We didn't watch Discovery.

419
00:33:20,640 --> 00:33:23,840
We did mention it earlier. Sorry. That can be the next one.

420
00:33:23,840 --> 00:33:28,240
Yeah, we will watch it. It's just, it's been one of those, it's the summer holidays. There's

421
00:33:28,240 --> 00:33:32,720
a lot going on. Get over it. We have.

422
00:33:32,720 --> 00:33:35,040
Right. Trek Roulette.

423
00:33:35,040 --> 00:33:36,040
Trek Roulette.

424
00:33:36,040 --> 00:33:41,240
I'm excited to hear what's going on. So people who weren't listening last time, there's a

425
00:33:41,240 --> 00:33:47,040
new game. It's going to, it's, I've got interest from five or six people now.

426
00:33:47,040 --> 00:33:48,520
Which is amazing. That's so cool.

427
00:33:48,520 --> 00:33:52,560
Who have shown interest and they're not all studio people too, which is quite cool.

428
00:33:52,560 --> 00:33:53,560
I'm going to-

429
00:33:53,560 --> 00:33:54,840
Are those names that we don't recognise?

430
00:33:54,840 --> 00:33:59,240
Yeah. There's some that I've not actually spoken to before. I've, there's a few people

431
00:33:59,240 --> 00:34:03,640
I'm going to eventually chase. I'm going to give them a long breath because I've been

432
00:34:03,640 --> 00:34:07,760
annoying. So I'm going to give them months rest because the amount of people we've got

433
00:34:07,760 --> 00:34:11,520
so far, you know, these aren't going to be coming out every fortnight.

434
00:34:11,520 --> 00:34:15,720
No. And you never know what I've written here may kill it dead.

435
00:34:15,720 --> 00:34:25,040
I don't know. So what is it? We've got a spreadsheet. You automatically chooses a Star Trek series,

436
00:34:25,040 --> 00:34:32,000
two main characters from that series, a plot point, a antagonist, and then you have to

437
00:34:32,000 --> 00:34:36,000
make an episode. It has to be comedy. That is the real rule of it.

438
00:34:36,000 --> 00:34:37,200
Or does it have to be comedy?

439
00:34:37,200 --> 00:34:38,200
No, I want it to be funny.

440
00:34:38,200 --> 00:34:39,200
Oh, fine. Okay.

441
00:34:39,200 --> 00:34:42,080
Yeah. Cause I think that, I mean, it's going to be funny anyway, but I think it should,

442
00:34:42,080 --> 00:34:43,560
I think they should all be funny.

443
00:34:43,560 --> 00:34:47,500
So to give you an idea, the one that you chose for me, I know we kind of had a little hand

444
00:34:47,500 --> 00:34:52,000
in things that got picked because the spreadsheet wasn't fully working. The series was the next

445
00:34:52,000 --> 00:34:57,720
generation. The main character was, well, I didn't do it as main character and sub character.

446
00:34:57,720 --> 00:34:58,720
I just did character one.

447
00:34:58,720 --> 00:35:00,640
That's just two characters that have to be in it.

448
00:35:00,640 --> 00:35:09,640
Pickard and Data. Plot was sexual encounter and antagonist was Freddy Krueger. I had a

449
00:35:09,640 --> 00:35:16,160
lot of fun writing this and I wrote it in no more than an hour because I just sat there

450
00:35:16,160 --> 00:35:20,800
on some holiday, kids had gone to bed and I was just in our little holiday home and

451
00:35:20,800 --> 00:35:25,720
thought, you know what, I'm going to power this out. And I had so much fun writing it

452
00:35:25,720 --> 00:35:29,480
and I've gone back over it today, chuckling myself.

453
00:35:29,480 --> 00:35:34,840
So I've been thinking how we're going to do it. Do we say the episode or do we go through

454
00:35:34,840 --> 00:35:39,280
the episode and when we get to a skip point, do the skip? How do you want to do it? Cause

455
00:35:39,280 --> 00:35:41,320
you've prepared it.

456
00:35:41,320 --> 00:35:48,220
I've got five acts and each of those acts is basically us to do backwards and forwards

457
00:35:48,220 --> 00:35:54,120
of the speech in it. I've actually written the five acts of script.

458
00:35:54,120 --> 00:36:00,920
So good. Okay. I was expecting, what I was expecting is you just telling me basically

459
00:36:00,920 --> 00:36:04,160
the plot, explain the plot and then we kind of pick apart the plot together and then there's

460
00:36:04,160 --> 00:36:07,080
going to be a couple of elements of it where you've made a script.

461
00:36:07,080 --> 00:36:12,680
I thought it would be much more fun to make you try and guess what's going to be going

462
00:36:12,680 --> 00:36:13,680
on.

463
00:36:13,680 --> 00:36:14,680
Oh, this is going to be good.

464
00:36:14,680 --> 00:36:19,960
So first of all, let's go for it. So next generation, obviously late eighties, early

465
00:36:19,960 --> 00:36:24,360
nineties was the series that ran our main character of that was good old Captain Picard.

466
00:36:24,360 --> 00:36:29,240
So obviously with Picard, there's so much you can do with him full stop and the same

467
00:36:29,240 --> 00:36:35,120
with Data. There's a lot you can do with him. And when you said sexual encounter, it's like,

468
00:36:35,120 --> 00:36:42,000
who is it a sexual encounter between Picard and Data? Who is it? No, it's not. It's not

469
00:36:42,000 --> 00:36:46,680
at all. Is it Data having a sexual encounter? No, it's not. It's Picard having a sexual

470
00:36:46,680 --> 00:36:49,800
encounter. So I had a lot of fun with trying to decide what I'm going to do with that.

471
00:36:49,800 --> 00:36:53,080
And then it's like, how the fuck am I going to fit Freddy Krueger in? Bearing in mind,

472
00:36:53,080 --> 00:36:56,160
I've actually never seen a nightmare on Elm Street or any of the films.

473
00:36:56,160 --> 00:36:59,480
It's got to be a post-coital kind of nap element.

474
00:36:59,480 --> 00:37:06,160
No, oh yeah, you guess based on what you know of me and what you know this is meant to be,

475
00:37:06,160 --> 00:37:07,640
what do you think happens in the episode?

476
00:37:07,640 --> 00:37:12,520
Well, from what I know of you, firstly, I'm going to find it very funny because I think

477
00:37:12,520 --> 00:37:13,520
you're very funny.

478
00:37:13,520 --> 00:37:14,520
Okay.

479
00:37:14,520 --> 00:37:21,120
It's going to be rude, I imagine, because believe it or not, you're very rude.

480
00:37:21,120 --> 00:37:24,120
No, really?

481
00:37:24,120 --> 00:37:29,440
Yeah, well, I don't know. It's got to be sleep involved because Freddy Krueger is a sleep

482
00:37:29,440 --> 00:37:32,640
monster. It comes in your dreams. Did you know that?

483
00:37:32,640 --> 00:37:36,800
I did know that. So I know enough about Freddy Krueger and I've seen enough to know what

484
00:37:36,800 --> 00:37:41,480
Freddy Krueger is and about. And I've seen enough of a couple of the films to kind of

485
00:37:41,480 --> 00:37:44,920
get a rough idea about what I was going to do with it.

486
00:37:44,920 --> 00:37:47,280
Does Picard sexually assault Freddy Krueger or something?

487
00:37:47,280 --> 00:37:49,720
No, there is no sexual assault involved.

488
00:37:49,720 --> 00:37:54,240
Okay, good. I don't want to have to cut a whole act from this.

489
00:37:54,240 --> 00:38:01,360
No, none of this is going to get cut. I'm pretty happy with this. I will say, I was,

490
00:38:01,360 --> 00:38:08,440
who did, originally there is a character that does die or is going to die in this, potentially.

491
00:38:08,440 --> 00:38:09,440
Yeah, the lady.

492
00:38:09,440 --> 00:38:15,920
Who do you think I would have killed off in this, that I was planning on killing off,

493
00:38:15,920 --> 00:38:16,920
I should say.

494
00:38:16,920 --> 00:38:17,920
Oh, so one of these characters dies?

495
00:38:17,920 --> 00:38:22,800
Out of the TNG crew, not either Picard or Data, but one of the crew.

496
00:38:22,800 --> 00:38:23,800
Oh, you'll kill La Forge.

497
00:38:23,800 --> 00:38:24,800
No.

498
00:38:24,800 --> 00:38:25,800
Wouldn't you kill La Forge?

499
00:38:25,800 --> 00:38:26,800
I was really tempted to kill-

500
00:38:26,800 --> 00:38:27,800
No, I know you'll kill the counsellor.

501
00:38:27,800 --> 00:38:30,800
Oh dear, actually there's quite a lot of people I would have killed. Maybe I should have a

502
00:38:30,800 --> 00:38:31,800
quick rewrite.

503
00:38:31,800 --> 00:38:32,800
Does Worf try and fight and lose?

504
00:38:32,800 --> 00:38:33,800
I was going to kill Wesley.

505
00:38:33,800 --> 00:38:34,800
Oh, Wesley.

506
00:38:34,800 --> 00:38:39,800
I like Wesley.

507
00:38:39,800 --> 00:38:44,520
Fun fact, I didn't know, and I don't know if this is true or not. You know when he finally

508
00:38:44,520 --> 00:38:50,000
gets given a job role on the Enterprise, basically they illegally employ him even though he's

509
00:38:50,000 --> 00:38:55,640
underage and he wears that stupid multi-coloured jumper. Do you know why he wears that?

510
00:38:55,640 --> 00:38:56,640
No.

511
00:38:56,640 --> 00:39:01,640
It's the every colour of all the departments within the Enterprise. You've got command,

512
00:39:01,640 --> 00:39:08,200
engineering, science, red, yellow, blue. So basically it's to signify that he's an ensign

513
00:39:08,200 --> 00:39:14,400
and he's learning the job and as he doesn't have a fixed role or whether he's going to

514
00:39:14,400 --> 00:39:17,880
do science or whether he's going to do command or if he's going to do science, he's got all

515
00:39:17,880 --> 00:39:18,880
the colours on show.

516
00:39:18,880 --> 00:39:19,880
That's a neat touch, isn't it?

517
00:39:19,880 --> 00:39:21,800
It's quite neat if it's true.

518
00:39:21,800 --> 00:39:22,800
Was that an IMDB trivia?

519
00:39:22,800 --> 00:39:28,480
I think it was a Twitter trivia actually. I think he actually might have quoted it. So

520
00:39:28,480 --> 00:39:30,440
I think there is some truth behind it.

521
00:39:30,440 --> 00:39:33,440
Will Wheaton's a great audiobook reader.

522
00:39:33,440 --> 00:39:38,240
Yes, he's got a good voice for it doesn't he? But anyway, I didn't kill him in the end.

523
00:39:38,240 --> 00:39:43,240
Instead I came up with Ensign Gary. Is he an ensign? I don't know. I can't remember

524
00:39:43,240 --> 00:39:44,240
where I made him.

525
00:39:44,240 --> 00:39:45,240
There was ensigns.

526
00:39:45,240 --> 00:39:46,800
Do you want to get into it then?

527
00:39:46,800 --> 00:39:47,800
Yeah, let's get into it.

528
00:39:47,800 --> 00:39:51,400
Or have you got any questions for me about anything? Oh actually you haven't really given

529
00:39:51,400 --> 00:39:52,920
me any ideas what else it might be.

530
00:39:52,920 --> 00:39:56,320
I don't know, I'm just excited to listen to it. I'm going to try and give it the shit

531
00:39:56,320 --> 00:39:58,080
show treatment too when we actually edit it.

532
00:39:58,080 --> 00:39:59,560
Yes please, it really needs it.

533
00:39:59,560 --> 00:40:05,200
Right, let's get on with it.

534
00:40:05,200 --> 00:40:07,040
Accessing Library Computer Data.

535
00:40:07,040 --> 00:40:10,640
Okay, what's this? Act 1, has it got a title? Has Act 1 got a title?

536
00:40:10,640 --> 00:40:11,640
No, no, there's no...

537
00:40:11,640 --> 00:40:12,880
Have you given the title to the episode?

538
00:40:12,880 --> 00:40:15,440
I haven't. I've really just... I should have...

539
00:40:15,440 --> 00:40:17,120
Maybe we'll think... We'll workshop at the end.

540
00:40:17,120 --> 00:40:21,960
We'll workshop at the end. I do not want you reading ahead. So you must only keep your

541
00:40:21,960 --> 00:40:27,920
eyes to Act 1 in fact. Hang on. As I did some research, and typically it's five acts apparently

542
00:40:27,920 --> 00:40:33,520
Star Trek, or the Next Generation is typically in five acts. So this act is the very first

543
00:40:33,520 --> 00:40:37,600
one that the episode has started, you've got a little bit of the blue text at the bottom

544
00:40:37,600 --> 00:40:43,200
saying who directed it, and you're into a scene and we haven't had the...

545
00:40:43,200 --> 00:40:47,480
Okay, I'll have to remember this from when I'm editing it, okay.

546
00:40:47,480 --> 00:40:48,480
So...

547
00:40:48,480 --> 00:40:49,480
Who am I playing?

548
00:40:49,480 --> 00:40:50,480
Who do you want to play?

549
00:40:50,480 --> 00:40:51,480
So we've got Picard and Guinan.

550
00:40:51,480 --> 00:40:54,240
In Act 1 it's Picard and Guinan.

551
00:40:54,240 --> 00:40:56,640
Am I going to do an impression? I can't even do impressions of either of these.

552
00:40:56,640 --> 00:40:59,040
I can't do an impression of either of them, so...

553
00:40:59,040 --> 00:41:00,040
I'll be Guinan.

554
00:41:00,040 --> 00:41:04,000
Okay, so just put on a slightly feminine voice.

555
00:41:04,000 --> 00:41:23,960
It's time to play Trek Roulette.

556
00:41:23,960 --> 00:41:26,160
Interior of the shuttlecraft Hawking.

557
00:41:26,160 --> 00:41:28,280
And yes, that was one of the shuttlecrafts of the Enterprise D.

558
00:41:28,280 --> 00:41:29,880
Okay.

559
00:41:29,880 --> 00:41:33,040
So would you like a cup of Earl Grey?

560
00:41:33,040 --> 00:41:35,000
Picard, you confuse me.

561
00:41:35,000 --> 00:41:36,200
How so?

562
00:41:36,200 --> 00:41:40,640
We've been friends for many years and you've never had that issue.

563
00:41:40,640 --> 00:41:42,440
Well, since the Borg.

564
00:41:42,440 --> 00:41:48,640
No, that's not it. You use your Borg experience to excuse yourself too often. This was different.

565
00:41:48,640 --> 00:41:53,840
Picard stands up revealing Federation-issued leather pants.

566
00:41:53,840 --> 00:41:57,440
We can try again.

567
00:41:57,440 --> 00:42:00,120
This is going to be difficult because I'm going to laugh.

568
00:42:00,120 --> 00:42:01,880
Oh, one more time.

569
00:42:01,880 --> 00:42:06,160
Picard goes under the console as Guinan sets her chair to recline.

570
00:42:06,160 --> 00:42:09,640
Oh, so gross. Who's eating her out?

571
00:42:09,640 --> 00:42:12,640
Intro plays.

572
00:42:12,640 --> 00:42:19,880
What do I do in Act 2?

573
00:42:19,880 --> 00:42:22,840
Okay, yeah, Act 2. Now you can unfold it and get into Act 2.

574
00:42:22,840 --> 00:42:26,240
Well, we've got Data and Gary in Act 2.

575
00:42:26,240 --> 00:42:31,640
Data and Ensign Gary are walking down the corridor of the Enterprise D.

576
00:42:31,640 --> 00:42:34,200
Data walks to a panel on the wall.

577
00:42:34,200 --> 00:42:38,800
Computer, start program Data 195, Dream and Nightmares.

578
00:42:38,800 --> 00:42:40,400
Affirmative.

579
00:42:40,400 --> 00:42:41,400
Nightmares?

580
00:42:41,400 --> 00:42:47,280
Yes, to experience everything humans do, I concluded that nightmares should also be part of my dream program.

581
00:42:47,280 --> 00:42:48,760
Who gave you the content?

582
00:42:48,760 --> 00:42:52,200
The Enterprise computer has thousands of records of people's dreams and nightmares.

583
00:42:52,200 --> 00:42:56,880
Wait, those are personal data. You can't just go through people's logs like that.

584
00:42:56,880 --> 00:43:02,600
Don't worry, I set my database search to 1980-2010. The historic data is valid.

585
00:43:02,600 --> 00:43:04,120
Wow, we've got logs from then?

586
00:43:04,120 --> 00:43:09,160
Yes, during the 1900s, humans often shared their dreams for others to watch in places called cinemas.

587
00:43:09,160 --> 00:43:11,120
Computer, start program.

588
00:43:11,120 --> 00:43:13,960
Affirmative.

589
00:43:13,960 --> 00:43:21,640
So bear in mind, 1980-2010 is the eras that all the Nightmare on Elm Street were released, including the modern ones.

590
00:43:21,640 --> 00:43:24,360
The doors slide open.

591
00:43:24,360 --> 00:43:31,800
Wow, this is amazing, Commander. This bedroom is so ancient. I can't believe people had these things in their rooms.

592
00:43:31,800 --> 00:43:36,280
Yes, they were not as minimalist as we are now. Possessions often took priority.

593
00:43:36,280 --> 00:43:38,320
Computer, where are we?

594
00:43:38,320 --> 00:43:46,600
The date is November 9th, 1984. You are in 1428 Elm Street, Springwood, Ohio, United States of America.

595
00:43:46,600 --> 00:43:56,080
The whole holodeck shakes and glitches. Ensign Gary has gone from wearing a gold uniform to red.

596
00:43:56,080 --> 00:43:59,880
Commander, what was that? Why is my costume changed to red?

597
00:43:59,880 --> 00:44:03,880
Computer, explain the anomaly just experienced on this holodeck.

598
00:44:03,880 --> 00:44:06,480
No error or anomaly was found.

599
00:44:06,480 --> 00:44:08,200
Is this part of the program?

600
00:44:08,200 --> 00:44:09,880
Yes.

601
00:44:09,880 --> 00:44:20,360
Reddy's iconic glove penetrates through the back of Ensign Gary and out of his chest, blades facing forward.

602
00:44:20,360 --> 00:44:22,720
Computer, stop program.

603
00:44:22,720 --> 00:44:31,560
Ensign Gary's body drops to the floor. A huge hole in his chest. Data picks his limp body up and hits his communicator.

604
00:44:31,560 --> 00:44:37,200
Data to Dr. Crusher, medical emergency on holodeck three. Ensign Gary is dead.

605
00:44:37,200 --> 00:44:42,040
Brilliant. I think the bits you're narrating, I'm going to have to have Valentino say.

606
00:44:42,040 --> 00:44:44,640
And I'm going to have to change the computer to the computer's voice.

607
00:44:44,640 --> 00:44:46,960
I think so. Absolutely.

608
00:44:46,960 --> 00:44:47,760
Wicked.

609
00:44:47,760 --> 00:44:49,760
Actually, you can be Dr. Crusher, I think.

610
00:44:49,760 --> 00:44:52,840
I'm liking this so far. So let's just do a little bit of a recap here.

611
00:44:52,840 --> 00:44:54,320
So we've had...

612
00:44:54,320 --> 00:44:56,480
So Picard's getting horny with Guinan on a...

613
00:44:56,480 --> 00:44:57,920
Muff diving Guinan.

614
00:44:57,920 --> 00:45:01,400
So we don't know where they've been, but they've been on a sex journey, basically.

615
00:45:01,400 --> 00:45:03,120
They've been out dogging.

616
00:45:03,120 --> 00:45:05,560
They've been off dogging on a shuttlecraft.

617
00:45:05,560 --> 00:45:12,520
And then yeah, Data has programmed a dreams and nightmares sequence in the holodeck to help experience dreams and nightmares.

618
00:45:12,520 --> 00:45:12,920
Okay.

619
00:45:12,920 --> 00:45:16,520
Where do you think it's going to go? Before you read any more, where do you think it's going to go from this point?

620
00:45:16,520 --> 00:45:19,120
So he's just killed Ensign Gary.

621
00:45:19,120 --> 00:45:24,280
Well, the thing is, so far you've met all the criteria. We've had a sexual encounter and we've got Freddy Krueger.

622
00:45:24,280 --> 00:45:26,160
So we've met the criteria.

623
00:45:26,160 --> 00:45:27,400
And we have three acts left.

624
00:45:27,400 --> 00:45:29,400
And we still got three acts to go.

625
00:45:29,400 --> 00:45:30,200
Okay, so...

626
00:45:30,200 --> 00:45:33,640
I could have killed Keiko as well. Shit, there's so many people I could have killed.

627
00:45:33,640 --> 00:45:37,120
So is this a holodeck mishap?

628
00:45:37,120 --> 00:45:39,720
And actually Krueger's going to get out.

629
00:45:39,720 --> 00:45:40,440
Wait and see.

630
00:45:40,440 --> 00:45:41,880
Let's find out. Right, okay.

631
00:45:41,880 --> 00:45:42,680
So into act three.

632
00:45:42,680 --> 00:45:45,080
So I'm Dr. Crusher. So I'm a lady again.

633
00:45:45,080 --> 00:45:46,680
You are. And the rest of act three is...

634
00:45:46,680 --> 00:45:50,000
Oh look, and Ryker's here too. And Worf.

635
00:45:50,000 --> 00:45:54,000
Act three extends onto that page.

636
00:45:54,000 --> 00:45:54,640
Okay, well who are you playing?

637
00:45:54,640 --> 00:45:57,360
As I said, I kind of got lost in writing.

638
00:45:57,360 --> 00:46:01,440
So you can be Dr. Crusher and Ryker. I'll be Data and Worf.

639
00:46:01,440 --> 00:46:04,520
Okay, this is going to get different. We're going to be talking to ourselves.

640
00:46:04,520 --> 00:46:08,560
Data, why would you disable the safety controls in your program?

641
00:46:08,560 --> 00:46:10,080
We can't just sweep the...

642
00:46:10,080 --> 00:46:11,840
What accent am I giving Ryker?

643
00:46:11,840 --> 00:46:13,960
Okay, Ryker's going to be a cockney.

644
00:46:13,960 --> 00:46:16,040
He's going to be a cockney.

645
00:46:16,040 --> 00:46:17,800
Now I'm not going to be able to do cockney.

646
00:46:17,800 --> 00:46:20,280
We can't just sweep this under the carpet, Data.

647
00:46:20,280 --> 00:46:22,640
I'm going to have to put you in the brig.

648
00:46:22,640 --> 00:46:25,880
I understand, sir. I shall report to the brig at once.

649
00:46:25,880 --> 00:46:29,760
Ryker to security. I need an escort to the brig from the medical bay.

650
00:46:29,760 --> 00:46:31,600
On our way, commander.

651
00:46:31,600 --> 00:46:34,480
That was Worf by the way, everybody.

652
00:46:34,480 --> 00:46:37,920
Data, I take no pressure in this.

653
00:46:37,920 --> 00:46:40,960
Thank you. I'm sorry if this has stopped our friendship.

654
00:46:40,960 --> 00:46:44,240
Just to point out, Data has said that several times through the series

655
00:46:44,240 --> 00:46:47,920
because of his constant fuck-ups he does that they sweep under the rug.

656
00:46:47,920 --> 00:46:49,960
I'm really sorry if this has affected our friendship.

657
00:46:49,960 --> 00:46:53,280
Stop doing shit like that then, Data.

658
00:46:53,280 --> 00:46:58,480
Ryker walks over to Beverly and with one swift punch knocks her out.

659
00:46:58,480 --> 00:47:00,840
Commander what are you doing?

660
00:47:00,840 --> 00:47:04,920
Say goodbye to your friend, you pale bastard.

661
00:47:04,920 --> 00:47:07,080
So that's Ryker in Freddy's voice.

662
00:47:07,080 --> 00:47:07,680
Yeah.

663
00:47:07,680 --> 00:47:09,000
I don't understand.

664
00:47:09,000 --> 00:47:12,280
Ryker peels his face off, revealing Freddy Krueger.

665
00:47:13,240 --> 00:47:16,720
I'm your worst nightmare.

666
00:47:16,720 --> 00:47:19,920
Beverly explodes into flames and starts screaming.

667
00:47:19,920 --> 00:47:26,920
Data runs over to Dr. Crusher, but it's too late.

668
00:47:26,920 --> 00:47:35,920
Her chard remains, stare back at him, with jaw locked open in a scream.

669
00:47:35,920 --> 00:47:38,920
Worf bursts into the medical bay with phaser drawn.

670
00:47:38,920 --> 00:47:40,920
Commander, what have you done?

671
00:47:40,920 --> 00:47:45,920
Lieutenant Worf, you must shoot him. That is not Commander Riker. Sir?

672
00:47:45,920 --> 00:47:48,920
Riker appears to be back to himself.

673
00:47:48,920 --> 00:47:54,920
Worf, Commander is having some sort of issue. Please escort him to the brig where we'll be charged with murder.

674
00:47:54,920 --> 00:47:56,920
Commander, if you'll come with me.

675
00:47:56,920 --> 00:48:05,920
Worf explodes into a mist of blood, covering Data's face. He brings his hands to his face and sees blood on his fingers.

676
00:48:05,920 --> 00:48:08,920
Okay, so he's still dreaming. This is still the dream.

677
00:48:08,920 --> 00:48:09,920
Act Four.

678
00:48:09,920 --> 00:48:13,920
This is still, I'm calling it still the dream. You've M. Night Shyamalan'd me.

679
00:48:13,920 --> 00:48:14,920
You can be Geordi.

680
00:48:14,920 --> 00:48:15,920
Oh.

681
00:48:15,920 --> 00:48:17,920
And Riker. I'll be Geordi. You can be Riker.

682
00:48:17,920 --> 00:48:18,920
I'll be Geordi.

683
00:48:18,920 --> 00:48:19,920
I'll be Riker and Data. You...

684
00:48:19,920 --> 00:48:20,920
I was going to do like...

685
00:48:20,920 --> 00:48:22,920
No, you be Riker, I'll be Geordi and Data, okay?

686
00:48:22,920 --> 00:48:26,920
I was going to do the voice from Monkey Dust, you know, the guy on the computer.

687
00:48:26,920 --> 00:48:28,920
No, come on.

688
00:48:28,920 --> 00:48:30,920
In Data's quarters.

689
00:48:30,920 --> 00:48:35,920
Geordi, it's no use, Commander. I can't wake him. He seems to be in some sort of positronic lock.

690
00:48:35,920 --> 00:48:37,920
Star Trek words.

691
00:48:37,920 --> 00:48:39,920
Positronic, yeah, we've got some Trek in.

692
00:48:39,920 --> 00:48:46,920
Geordi, I know he's our friend, but how many hours do you dedicate to fixing the fuck-ups he causes?

693
00:48:46,920 --> 00:48:50,920
I know, Commander, but where else can we find someone who can fix issues in seconds round here?

694
00:48:50,920 --> 00:48:54,920
Geordi fiddling with a cable attached to Data's skull.

695
00:48:54,920 --> 00:49:00,920
Wait, I've got an idea. If we reboot the ship's computer, that will disconnect Data safely.

696
00:49:00,920 --> 00:49:02,920
Don't we always do that, though?

697
00:49:02,920 --> 00:49:04,920
It works, though, doesn't it?

698
00:49:04,920 --> 00:49:05,920
Do it.

699
00:49:05,920 --> 00:49:10,920
Computer, recognise Geordi LaForge, code 1-3-omega-7. Reboot main computer now.

700
00:49:10,920 --> 00:49:12,920
Stand by.

701
00:49:12,920 --> 00:49:14,920
The power goes off and on again.

702
00:49:14,920 --> 00:49:17,920
Commander Riker, Geordi, why are you in my room?

703
00:49:17,920 --> 00:49:21,920
You're two hours late for your shift, Data. What is all of this?

704
00:49:21,920 --> 00:49:24,920
I was attempting to experience dreams and nightmares.

705
00:49:24,920 --> 00:49:26,920
Did it work?

706
00:49:26,920 --> 00:49:31,920
Yes. You were there, Commander. You brutally killed our crewmates and called me a pale bastard.

707
00:49:31,920 --> 00:49:33,920
Well, that does sound like a nightmare.

708
00:49:33,920 --> 00:49:35,920
How do you feel, Data?

709
00:49:35,920 --> 00:49:42,920
I cannot say. I find myself hoping there aren't multiple sequels to this nightmare, each getting worse until a complete remake where I skip myself.

710
00:49:42,920 --> 00:49:44,920
Why did this happen?

711
00:49:44,920 --> 00:49:50,920
Get to the bridge, Data. I've got some logs I need you to delete before the Captain comes back.

712
00:49:50,920 --> 00:49:53,920
We're using the Captain's personal 1980s view screen again.

713
00:49:53,920 --> 00:50:00,920
You know it. We've made Riker such a deviant.

714
00:50:00,920 --> 00:50:03,920
Oh, yeah. And then we're into the final act.

715
00:50:03,920 --> 00:50:06,920
OK, we can write. Who's in this, right? Picard and Geidling?

716
00:50:06,920 --> 00:50:08,920
Yeah, you're Geidling again.

717
00:50:08,920 --> 00:50:14,920
The interior windows of the shuttlecraft are steamed up. Picard's leather shorts are on the console.

718
00:50:14,920 --> 00:50:19,920
A pile of what looks like space dildos cover the floor behind the seats.

719
00:50:19,920 --> 00:50:23,920
Where did you learn that? I've never felt so wide.

720
00:50:23,920 --> 00:50:25,920
Oh, that's so gross.

721
00:50:25,920 --> 00:50:34,920
I've been around, you know. That particular trick was from the Wild West. I remember it well as it was the first time I caught gonorrhea.

722
00:50:34,920 --> 00:50:36,920
Gonorrhea, I said by the way, everyone.

723
00:50:36,920 --> 00:50:38,920
You got cured of that, right?

724
00:50:38,920 --> 00:50:41,920
Each and every time.

725
00:50:41,920 --> 00:50:46,920
Picard looks disgusted. Guy-nan looks quizzically at the console in front of her.

726
00:50:46,920 --> 00:50:50,920
Let me give him a second to compose myself.

727
00:50:50,920 --> 00:50:55,920
I may not be a fancy pilot, but doesn't that button mean an active subspace link?

728
00:50:55,920 --> 00:50:57,920
Computer, show ongoing transmission.

729
00:50:57,920 --> 00:51:03,920
The screen comes to life. Benjamin Sisko is sat there watching with Dax, Kira and Bashir.

730
00:51:03,920 --> 00:51:10,920
I knew I'd get something on you in the end, Captain. I just never knew you'd like it in your end.

731
00:51:10,920 --> 00:51:14,920
Now, Commander, let's be sensible about this.

732
00:51:14,920 --> 00:51:15,920
Goodbye, Captain.

733
00:51:15,920 --> 00:51:17,920
Computer, end transmission.

734
00:51:17,920 --> 00:51:42,920
Picard places his head in his hands. We see the shuttlecraft approaching the Enterprise as the credits roll.

735
00:51:42,920 --> 00:51:47,920
So it's getting spied on by Sisko.

736
00:51:47,920 --> 00:51:51,920
Sisko's got some dirt on him after killing his wife at Wolf 359.

737
00:51:51,920 --> 00:51:54,920
Oh yeah, are you telling me?

738
00:51:54,920 --> 00:52:02,920
Yeah, that's the whole reason Sisko hates Picard. Because as an acutus, the Borg killed Sisko's wife.

739
00:52:02,920 --> 00:52:07,920
Wow, that was brilliant. That was brilliant.

740
00:52:07,920 --> 00:52:17,920
I had so much fun writing that.

741
00:52:17,920 --> 00:52:19,920
Well, TJ.

742
00:52:19,920 --> 00:52:20,920
You didn't see that coming?

743
00:52:20,920 --> 00:52:29,920
That was flipping brilliant. Oh my god. People obviously can't see because we don't record our faces, but my face now hurts from smiling so much.

744
00:52:29,920 --> 00:52:31,920
Is everything I hoped it would be?

745
00:52:31,920 --> 00:52:43,920
I honestly wanted to do the whole, okay, I wanted to Shamalama Ding Dong you with the whole, Ensign Gary's dead, then they're on the medical bay and it's like, why did you turn off the safety things?

746
00:52:43,920 --> 00:52:45,920
Because that's the sort of thing Data would do.

747
00:52:45,920 --> 00:52:46,920
Yeah, yeah.

748
00:52:46,920 --> 00:52:51,920
And then have it, oh no, they're still on the holodeck. But actually, no, it's all in Data's head.

749
00:52:51,920 --> 00:52:55,920
You could have very easily inceptioned it as well and just kept it going.

750
00:52:55,920 --> 00:52:56,920
That's true.

751
00:52:56,920 --> 00:53:01,920
And then the dream energy, because when they do that in the films, they think they're out of a dream at one point.

752
00:53:01,920 --> 00:53:02,920
Yeah, that's true.

753
00:53:02,920 --> 00:53:10,920
They do stuff like that. So you could have easily done that. But yeah, I do like the Guinan Picard stuff with Sisko.

754
00:53:10,920 --> 00:53:19,920
I just wanted Sisko to get his own back on Picard. And yeah, that was just kind of, that was the least enjoyable bits to write about. I enjoyed all of it.

755
00:53:19,920 --> 00:53:27,920
But it's like, right, sexual encounter. Let's just have Picard get it off his chest and just do Guinan, because you know they blatantly do.

756
00:53:27,920 --> 00:53:32,920
So just to do some on live, live recorded workshop of this.

757
00:53:32,920 --> 00:53:44,920
So I'm deciding whether I'm going to, when I ask people to get involved, where people have come and said they want to be involved, whether I do two recordings, whether I record with them, give them the thing so they can get the reaction live.

758
00:53:44,920 --> 00:53:50,920
Or if I just present them with it and say, this is what it's given you. And then we only meet once.

759
00:53:50,920 --> 00:53:58,920
I think I'm going to have to do it per person because the other guys that are podcasters, we're busy doing bits.

760
00:53:58,920 --> 00:54:03,920
So we don't, it can be very difficult. And I know one of the guys is in America as well.

761
00:54:03,920 --> 00:54:08,920
So his time zone is going to make it difficult to record twice in the space of a week.

762
00:54:08,920 --> 00:54:15,920
So it might be that I just send him the thing. But also I'm going to let people say, because not everyone's watched Prodigy, for example.

763
00:54:15,920 --> 00:54:19,920
So I'm going to say that what are the series that you're familiar with? Oh, it's these three.

764
00:54:19,920 --> 00:54:23,920
Okay. Well, I'll randomly generate it till I get one of those series. And then that's what you get.

765
00:54:23,920 --> 00:54:25,920
So I'm going to be fair to people.

766
00:54:25,920 --> 00:54:29,920
Almost like we give them a one get out of jail free card almost.

767
00:54:29,920 --> 00:54:35,920
If there's something in there that you particularly don't like or don't feel you could do, we'll regenerate it for you.

768
00:54:35,920 --> 00:54:39,920
Well, I'm not going to give you that. I'm going to give you, you have to just know it.

769
00:54:39,920 --> 00:54:46,920
So if you said to me, look, I only know the original series. I only know Deep Space Nine and I only know lower decks.

770
00:54:46,920 --> 00:54:49,920
Okay. Then they're the only three that I'm going to let it pick from.

771
00:54:49,920 --> 00:54:54,920
So I'll keep randomly generating until one of those three comes up and then you get what you get.

772
00:54:54,920 --> 00:55:02,920
Because that's the whole point. It's got to be, it's meant to be something to challenge all of us to do this kind of creative thing.

773
00:55:02,920 --> 00:55:07,920
Fair enough. As an extra. But what I'm going to do is now you've done it, acting like a guest.

774
00:55:07,920 --> 00:55:12,920
I now want you to give me something to add to the list.

775
00:55:12,920 --> 00:55:17,920
So I'm putting you on the spot here. So maybe you can just tell me later.

776
00:55:17,920 --> 00:55:21,920
But you are now going to give me something that we can add to the pool.

777
00:55:21,920 --> 00:55:29,920
So either approach, you could give me an antagonist and a plot point or just one or the other or something that we can add to it.

778
00:55:29,920 --> 00:55:37,920
And that's what I'm going to ask everybody. So when I actually contact people specifically about say, you know, at the end, you're going to give me something that we can add to the pool for everyone else.

779
00:55:37,920 --> 00:55:41,920
I'd be part of the pool for people. Okay. So then it will keep growing.

780
00:55:41,920 --> 00:55:47,920
I've got one for you for plots. Okay. Go on. Genocide. Genocide. Okay.

781
00:55:47,920 --> 00:55:52,920
Because let's face it, if you get a Voyager episode, that's going to be really easy to do.

782
00:55:52,920 --> 00:55:59,920
And I'm going to write who is added by. So when it does come up, we can say, this is the plot point. Oh, and it's been added by this person.

783
00:55:59,920 --> 00:56:08,920
The same as when we finally get it on the website where people can submit and send us the form and we add it. I'll put who it was that added it.

784
00:56:08,920 --> 00:56:11,920
Yeah. Okay. And can I have an antagonist as well? You can add an antagonist.

785
00:56:11,920 --> 00:56:19,920
The Chuckle Brothers, which I know won't mean anything to the American audience, but for the British audience, that's going to make a very interesting episode.

786
00:56:19,920 --> 00:56:25,920
He's been in the news recently, isn't he? Yes. He's haunted by his dead brother. Yeah. Yeah.

787
00:56:25,920 --> 00:56:30,920
I'm not sure what I feel about that. Sad.

788
00:56:30,920 --> 00:56:34,920
Command functions are offline.

789
00:56:34,920 --> 00:56:41,920
Thank you everyone for listening. I know it wasn't what you were expecting. Two episodes in a row. Not what you were expecting.

790
00:56:41,920 --> 00:56:47,920
Hopefully you enjoyed it though. And also if you can come up with an adequate name for the name of my episode, that'd be really appreciated.

791
00:56:47,920 --> 00:56:51,920
Oh God. Yeah. We even thought of an episode. Yeah. There's no way I could think of a name on the spot.

792
00:56:51,920 --> 00:56:58,920
No, not right now. But this episode is just going to be called Trek roulette. So that's that spoilers.

793
00:56:58,920 --> 00:57:03,920
What spoilers? You would have already seen it. What are we talking about? Spoilers for you and me.

794
00:57:03,920 --> 00:57:10,920
You know, I had every intention to write down all the things that we're supposed to say at the end of the episode before this and I didn't bother. So can you save me one last time, please?

795
00:57:10,920 --> 00:57:24,920
Of course I can. We are part of the Studio Channel 84 network. We are a small indie network of podcasts that includes the Untitled Trek Show, the Variety Show podcast, Who Takes the Socks Off and Lightly Used.

796
00:57:24,920 --> 00:57:37,920
Head over to channel84.co.uk to find out everything about each of those podcasts. If you would like to find out more about the Untitled Trek Show, head over to channel84.co.uk, click on shows, click on Untitled Trek Show and you can find out more about us there.

797
00:57:37,920 --> 00:57:51,920
All our social media links are also on our contact page in exactly the same place. Those social medias include Twitter, threads, Facebook, TikTok, Instagram and everything else that we can get our dirty paws onto.

798
00:57:51,920 --> 00:58:01,920
And that is that. The only other thing that's left to say regarding contact is if you would like to email us. If you would like to email Rob directly, you can do rob at channel84.co.uk.

799
00:58:01,920 --> 00:58:15,920
If you would like to speak to me, you can do TJ at channel84.co.uk. Or if you would like to speak to both of us at the same time, send it to podcasts, that's plural, podcasts at channel84.co.uk.

800
00:58:15,920 --> 00:58:42,920
We're good. Thank you very much for that, TJ. And yeah, if you want to be involved in Trek roulette, my DMs on Twitter are open. You can message us on Instagram, Facebook, all these places that you just heard of. We will get the message and we'll have a chat. 100%. Thank you very much, mate. Thank you very much. And send Rob Cockpix in his DMs. Love you. Bye. I'm going to rub my choddy.

801
00:58:42,920 --> 00:58:49,920
Thank you for listening to the channel 84 Untitled Trek show. This station is now shutting down and we'll be back in two weeks.

802
00:58:49,920 --> 00:59:10,920
Excelsior.

803
00:59:10,920 --> 00:59:24,920
This was a studio channel 84 network show. To find more, head over to channel84.co.uk now.