1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:05,520 What if I told you you can be whoever you want to be? That's correct. You can be 2 00:00:05,520 --> 00:00:12,240 whoever you want to be. There are no set rules or laws that govern your identity 3 00:00:12,240 --> 00:00:19,040 because our identities, the very essence of who we are, are not set in stone. 4 00:00:19,040 --> 00:00:25,000 They're crafted from the myriad of experiences, interactions, and cultural 5 00:00:25,000 --> 00:00:30,720 influences we absorb throughout our lives. But what happens when these 6 00:00:30,720 --> 00:00:38,720 elements change? How does our identity shift and evolve in response? 7 00:00:42,560 --> 00:00:46,680 Welcome to Life Unscripted where we delve deep into the fluid nature of 8 00:00:46,680 --> 00:00:51,040 identity and the roles we play in life. I'm Alan Stafford, your host and guide 9 00:00:51,040 --> 00:00:56,080 on this journey into understanding how our identities shape and are shaped by 10 00:00:56,080 --> 00:01:00,440 the world around us. In today's episode we're exploring the construct of 11 00:01:00,440 --> 00:01:05,440 identity, how it forms, changes, and impacts every facet of our lives. 12 00:01:12,440 --> 00:01:17,880 So why is it important to understand the dynamics of identity? I mean we're always 13 00:01:17,880 --> 00:01:23,960 asked for identity card or some form of identity to identify us, but that's not 14 00:01:23,960 --> 00:01:28,480 really, is that really us? But why is it important to understand the dynamics of 15 00:01:28,480 --> 00:01:32,840 it, of that identity? Well let's look at it this way. Consider navigating life 16 00:01:32,840 --> 00:01:37,240 as a play where you can alter your character and our sense of self is our 17 00:01:37,240 --> 00:01:43,000 script which is directing our actions and our interactions. So by examining how 18 00:01:43,000 --> 00:01:49,480 our identities evolve we can better understand ourselves and others which 19 00:01:49,480 --> 00:01:54,960 leads to more meaningful relationships and a more authentic life. And again 20 00:01:54,960 --> 00:02:01,800 authenticity in your life comes down to your own subjectivity in how you want to 21 00:02:01,800 --> 00:02:06,560 present your life, who you want to be. So to begin with our discussion on 22 00:02:06,560 --> 00:02:12,000 identity I'm gonna lay down some groundwork and define identity but also 23 00:02:12,000 --> 00:02:17,040 define roles and labels so that we better understand the difference and 24 00:02:17,040 --> 00:02:23,480 nuances between them because identity roles and labels are often used 25 00:02:23,480 --> 00:02:28,640 interchangeably but are not exactly the same. And I think it's important to 26 00:02:28,640 --> 00:02:33,160 understand this because again this is all a construct of our thinking of our 27 00:02:33,160 --> 00:02:37,920 behavior of our past experiences and all the influences in our life. We can 28 00:02:37,920 --> 00:02:43,440 change that and alter any of these at any point. Should we choose to? Some of us 29 00:02:43,440 --> 00:02:49,240 choose not to at all which is perfectly fine with me. So identity refers to 30 00:02:49,240 --> 00:02:55,240 this broad it's a broad encompassing concept of who a person is, of who you 31 00:02:55,240 --> 00:03:01,560 are. So the identity look at it as an umbrella term for encompassing who you 32 00:03:01,560 --> 00:03:07,440 are as a person and then it includes you know an individual's self conception 33 00:03:07,440 --> 00:03:14,240 and self perception and it's basically comprised of personal characteristics, 34 00:03:14,240 --> 00:03:21,040 your beliefs, values and emotional responses. I mean because you know you 35 00:03:21,040 --> 00:03:28,040 can be labeled a cry baby and if you can consistently cry or emotional your 36 00:03:28,040 --> 00:03:32,880 identity or that that behavior shapes your identity and identity is shaped by 37 00:03:32,880 --> 00:03:35,880 both internal factors like your personal experiences like I said and 38 00:03:35,880 --> 00:03:40,760 psychological makeup and also external influences such as your social 39 00:03:40,760 --> 00:03:45,200 interactions and cultural background because cultures have their own identity, 40 00:03:45,200 --> 00:03:50,280 their own behavior. You ever think about that? How a culture, a culture there's 41 00:03:50,280 --> 00:03:55,040 nothing mandating how a culture should be other than the people in that culture 42 00:03:55,040 --> 00:03:58,240 who have grown up with their set of beliefs that can be broken at any time 43 00:03:58,240 --> 00:04:02,040 but they seem to be mesmerized by that and kind of controlled by that home 44 00:04:02,040 --> 00:04:06,880 ideology of how to behave and how to think and believe and what they should 45 00:04:06,880 --> 00:04:10,320 and should not do and which identify which creates their identity and then 46 00:04:10,320 --> 00:04:14,280 that comes out of you the individual who comes out of that cultural still 47 00:04:14,280 --> 00:04:18,920 retaining some of that identity. So I'll give you an example if you're from India 48 00:04:18,920 --> 00:04:24,120 for example and you are rooted in that culture but yet you come to the United 49 00:04:24,120 --> 00:04:28,640 States or you go into Europe somewhere where the culture is different you can 50 00:04:28,640 --> 00:04:32,800 do one or two things you can assimilate or you can retain your cultural 51 00:04:32,800 --> 00:04:39,320 identity as an Indian and just survive in a different cultural land. A lot of 52 00:04:39,320 --> 00:04:44,760 people try to come and assimilate into the host country's culture taken on a 53 00:04:44,760 --> 00:04:50,720 whole new identity or creating a new hybrid identity between their culture 54 00:04:50,720 --> 00:04:56,120 and the new culture and key aspects of identity is that it's fluid and 55 00:04:56,120 --> 00:05:03,560 multifaceted. Fluid what I mean by fluid is that it's constantly changing and 56 00:05:03,560 --> 00:05:10,400 it's a dynamic interaction of personal history your ongoing experiences in 57 00:05:10,400 --> 00:05:16,840 your in social contexts. It encompasses various elements including gender 58 00:05:16,840 --> 00:05:23,280 identity which is a hot topic nowadays cultural identity which I mentioned and 59 00:05:23,280 --> 00:05:30,520 personal achievement and a lot more than that. And just real quickly folks gender 60 00:05:30,520 --> 00:05:36,360 identity is not the same thing as sexual orientation or biological sex what 61 00:05:36,360 --> 00:05:40,880 you're born with the sex organs you're born with. Gender identity is how you 62 00:05:40,880 --> 00:05:46,280 identify in what gender. We're not gonna get too deep into this here but we'll 63 00:05:46,280 --> 00:05:50,960 touch on a little bit of gender identity. And then we have labels I am not a fan 64 00:05:50,960 --> 00:05:56,520 of labels because I think what happens is when you label somebody most weak-minded 65 00:05:56,520 --> 00:06:03,440 people will live to that label. They'll use that as an excuse or as a source of 66 00:06:03,440 --> 00:06:08,840 empowerment depending on their perspective. As an example if you label a 67 00:06:08,840 --> 00:06:17,040 child slow or weak that child will grow up thinking he's slow or weak. And the 68 00:06:17,040 --> 00:06:21,840 opposite is true you can name a slow or weak child intelligent and they'll grow 69 00:06:21,840 --> 00:06:25,680 up thinking they're intelligent. So labels are very powerful terms and 70 00:06:25,680 --> 00:06:29,520 categories applied to you know individuals or groups based on specific 71 00:06:29,520 --> 00:06:35,480 characteristics and going back to if you perceive someone as slow or weak or not 72 00:06:35,480 --> 00:06:40,200 as intelligent and you identify that characteristic in them you might label 73 00:06:40,200 --> 00:06:45,480 them that way which may or may not be true. And labels can also be self-assigned 74 00:06:45,480 --> 00:06:54,800 but are often assigned by others. So you can label yourself I'm a vegan. You know 75 00:06:54,800 --> 00:07:01,600 I'm a carnivore I like meat I like those those are my fun labels. I'm a vegan no 76 00:07:01,600 --> 00:07:05,640 you're not you're a human you just don't like to eat meat okay. Let's call it 77 00:07:05,640 --> 00:07:09,880 what it is. And I think labels are also it's not even I think labels are also 78 00:07:09,880 --> 00:07:17,720 used to simplify complex identities and to basically easy to understand terms. And 79 00:07:17,720 --> 00:07:21,520 we just talked about you know like I'm a vegan or you say I'm a conservative I'm 80 00:07:21,520 --> 00:07:26,440 an introvert I'm an athlete I'm I'm diabetic. These are all labels folks. 81 00:07:26,440 --> 00:07:31,120 These are labels that you give yourself or someone else gives you gives you and 82 00:07:31,120 --> 00:07:33,880 you might be you might have been labeled something where you didn't even think 83 00:07:33,880 --> 00:07:37,120 you've met that label. Like someone might have said oh you're ultra 84 00:07:37,120 --> 00:07:41,920 conservative you're like no I'm not I'm actually kind of middle of the road. You 85 00:07:41,920 --> 00:07:45,960 know or you're a vegan you know and like not really I mean I do eat a lot of 86 00:07:45,960 --> 00:07:50,840 vegetables but you know I do eat meat too. So people may miss assign a label and 87 00:07:50,840 --> 00:07:54,160 that can be dangerous because they can stick to that and form their own 88 00:07:54,160 --> 00:07:58,360 belief systems all around the label they gave you which is not even true. And I 89 00:07:58,360 --> 00:08:03,440 think the danger of labels which is a key aspect is that it reduces your full 90 00:08:03,440 --> 00:08:07,760 identity to one or a few dimensions. It doesn't take in the account your entire 91 00:08:07,760 --> 00:08:11,880 identity of who you are. It focuses on probably the most visible or prominent 92 00:08:11,880 --> 00:08:16,240 traits that you exhibit. It doesn't do a deep dive it's like a heuristic a 93 00:08:16,240 --> 00:08:22,200 shortcut to identifying someone we just give them a label. So on the on on one 94 00:08:22,200 --> 00:08:27,160 hand labels can help facilitate social understanding and communication you 95 00:08:27,160 --> 00:08:31,160 know because they're simplified but they can also be very limiting and 96 00:08:31,160 --> 00:08:35,800 misleading or even stigmatizing if they create that over a simplistic 97 00:08:35,800 --> 00:08:43,440 view of of a person you know. Like I said if if someone labels you ignorant for 98 00:08:43,440 --> 00:08:47,480 example and you're not ignorant but they label that because you might have 99 00:08:47,480 --> 00:08:51,400 misquoted something or they just they just don't like you and they might give 100 00:08:51,400 --> 00:08:57,200 you that label. And that can become a problem because if they're an influencer 101 00:08:57,200 --> 00:09:01,640 within a group they can convince others that you are that label and you're not. 102 00:09:01,640 --> 00:09:08,680 And finally folks roles so we've had identity labels and roles which refer to 103 00:09:08,680 --> 00:09:13,880 expected behaviors you know expected responsibilities and norms associated 104 00:09:13,880 --> 00:09:19,040 with very specific social positions or status and you can have multiple roles 105 00:09:19,040 --> 00:09:23,560 if you have multiple identities and I'm a little concerned but I mean you can 106 00:09:23,560 --> 00:09:28,080 have multiple roles for example you know like mother teacher daughters you know 107 00:09:28,080 --> 00:09:34,560 son dad construction worker you know airline pilot leader student all these 108 00:09:34,560 --> 00:09:39,200 are all roles you play multiple roles you might play a role as a office worker 109 00:09:39,200 --> 00:09:44,160 during the day come home you play the role as a husband or wife at night a 110 00:09:44,160 --> 00:09:50,560 mom you might be a caregiver you might have a second job and be a police officer 111 00:09:50,560 --> 00:09:53,560 at night you know an office worker during the day I mean I don't know if they 112 00:09:53,560 --> 00:09:57,960 do that but I'm just saying that you can have those multiple roles and each role 113 00:09:57,960 --> 00:10:03,720 is nicely packaged with it comes with very specific expectations from society 114 00:10:03,720 --> 00:10:10,960 about how you should behave in these roles. So take for example if I say a 115 00:10:10,960 --> 00:10:16,880 police officer what are some thoughts that come to mind right now about how a 116 00:10:16,880 --> 00:10:24,080 police officer should behave then I say a sailor you know cargo ship deckhand 117 00:10:24,080 --> 00:10:32,480 how would how should they behave or if I say a restaurant chef or a military 118 00:10:32,480 --> 00:10:37,160 leader these all have these preconceived ideas in your mind these pictures of how 119 00:10:37,160 --> 00:10:40,560 these roles of how people should behave because they're pre-programmed into your 120 00:10:40,560 --> 00:10:46,520 thinking and then sometimes when someone in a certain role like a teacher for 121 00:10:46,520 --> 00:10:50,840 example we think teachers should be respected or respectful of students they 122 00:10:50,840 --> 00:10:54,960 should be educated and smart and they should they should hold a at least a 123 00:10:54,960 --> 00:10:58,960 higher moral ground not that they always do but let's say one of them goes 124 00:10:58,960 --> 00:11:04,000 astray and does something completely opposite out of character for that role 125 00:11:04,000 --> 00:11:08,840 what happens then everyone just starts going oh my god this teacher did this 126 00:11:08,840 --> 00:11:12,440 they start talking about it because it's so it's such a departure from that 127 00:11:12,440 --> 00:11:17,400 pre-packaged role expect expectations and we see that in churches we see that 128 00:11:17,400 --> 00:11:21,920 with Catholic churches and some of the priests that have basically been found 129 00:11:21,920 --> 00:11:28,520 guilty of I would say sexual abuse of children you know that's and that's not 130 00:11:28,520 --> 00:11:35,640 a good thing you would expect that a man of the cloth would be respected and 131 00:11:35,640 --> 00:11:41,360 hold a higher moral ground but when that changes it changes your whole 132 00:11:41,360 --> 00:11:49,040 perspective of religion of the priesthood and so it really damages the 133 00:11:49,040 --> 00:11:53,960 concept of that role so now the stigma which might be just a few that have done 134 00:11:53,960 --> 00:11:59,800 that but it the entire priesthood gets punished you know has this negative 135 00:11:59,800 --> 00:12:07,320 stigma okay so now that we understand generally what roles play labels and then 136 00:12:07,320 --> 00:12:12,240 an overview of identity let's get into the crux of identity and understanding 137 00:12:12,240 --> 00:12:19,920 identity in you know our modern world and it is quite a modern world oh boy I 138 00:12:19,920 --> 00:12:25,480 crack myself up sometimes I don't even know why I crack myself up maybe it's 139 00:12:25,480 --> 00:12:31,120 out of the little people in my head talking to me so take in a look at 140 00:12:31,120 --> 00:12:39,040 identity in our modern context it's a very complex idea very multifaceted 141 00:12:39,040 --> 00:12:44,120 construct that goes beyond as we said earlier traditional labels of race 142 00:12:44,120 --> 00:12:50,560 gender and nationality and anything else it encompasses various roles that we 143 00:12:50,560 --> 00:12:55,000 play and we talked about the roles parent worker friend doctor whatever the 144 00:12:55,000 --> 00:12:59,600 profession you are and it's influenced by personal choices our social 145 00:12:59,600 --> 00:13:09,040 interactions and societal expectations and let's not forget today's digital age 146 00:13:09,040 --> 00:13:15,160 virtual identities on social media and online platforms also play a crucial role 147 00:13:15,160 --> 00:13:22,600 in shaping our self-concept I mean how many of you have created a whole 148 00:13:22,600 --> 00:13:27,760 different identity and persona for yourself online that is a departure from 149 00:13:27,760 --> 00:13:34,120 what you are in reality I should say physical reality and I'm sure quite a 150 00:13:34,120 --> 00:13:40,840 few people have done so they be they pretend to be somebody different and I 151 00:13:40,840 --> 00:13:47,160 shouldn't say pretend because pretend is assuming that identity and who you are 152 00:13:47,160 --> 00:13:52,680 as a locked-in concept it's set in stone and it's not you can be who you want to 153 00:13:52,680 --> 00:13:58,160 be online offline but people take on a whole different identity when they're 154 00:13:58,160 --> 00:14:02,760 online and this is probably a direct result of the fact that identity is 155 00:14:02,760 --> 00:14:08,920 dynamic it allows for changes you know and growth over time and you may not 156 00:14:08,920 --> 00:14:12,520 like how you live your life you know in a physical world so therefore you get 157 00:14:12,520 --> 00:14:16,800 into the social the social digital realm and you want to be somebody different 158 00:14:16,800 --> 00:14:19,240 you want to act different you want to present yourself in a very different 159 00:14:19,240 --> 00:14:24,960 light you know you want to you want to be looked at maybe a little differently 160 00:14:24,960 --> 00:14:29,080 than what other people have assigned other roles of people have assigned you 161 00:14:29,080 --> 00:14:33,840 in the physical world which also identity being dynamic is influenced by new 162 00:14:33,840 --> 00:14:38,240 experiences and insights and that takes into account this whole new digital realm 163 00:14:38,240 --> 00:14:41,920 which we're all a part of unless you live in the woods somewhere and you don't 164 00:14:41,920 --> 00:14:46,160 have any technology which is you know all the power to you I envy you if you if 165 00:14:46,160 --> 00:14:49,400 you're that person but then again you wouldn't be listening to me because you 166 00:14:49,400 --> 00:14:54,600 wouldn't have the technology so scratch that and culture profoundly shapes our 167 00:14:54,600 --> 00:14:58,720 identity and again we talked about by setting norms values and the behaviors 168 00:14:58,720 --> 00:15:03,960 that are adopted from an early age you know you're you're influenced from an 169 00:15:03,960 --> 00:15:08,240 early age from your cultural background or your parents cultural background they 170 00:15:08,240 --> 00:15:12,600 they bestow upon you their belief system now it doesn't mean that you can't grow 171 00:15:12,600 --> 00:15:15,440 up and change that a lot of a lot of kids do especially a lot of immigrant kids 172 00:15:15,440 --> 00:15:19,600 who come to the United States or come to Europe and they they change their 173 00:15:19,600 --> 00:15:23,720 identity to adapt to the the new society the new culture they want to be fit in 174 00:15:23,720 --> 00:15:27,760 they want to fit in they want to be part of that society but culture still plays 175 00:15:27,760 --> 00:15:32,200 an important role in a person's identity because it basically dictates 176 00:15:32,200 --> 00:15:36,360 expectations around certain milestones in life you know for example your 177 00:15:36,360 --> 00:15:40,560 education career family and the Hispanic culture they do the quinceanera the 178 00:15:40,560 --> 00:15:48,000 the young girl coming up of age at 15 in Judaism they have the bat mitzvah and 179 00:15:48,000 --> 00:15:53,680 the bar mitzvah for boys and girls and basically these rights of passage 180 00:15:53,680 --> 00:15:59,640 miles cultural milestones influences how that individual going through that 181 00:15:59,640 --> 00:16:03,840 deal with life events basically and it changes their behavior a little bit well 182 00:16:03,840 --> 00:16:07,640 now I'm a man now I'm a woman I've gone through this right of passage that is my 183 00:16:07,640 --> 00:16:12,440 new identity and so to speak and you know something we touched on briefly 184 00:16:12,440 --> 00:16:17,800 go globalization this whole interconnectedness between countries and 185 00:16:17,800 --> 00:16:24,480 cultures basically you know even travel can create a hybrid identity 186 00:16:24,480 --> 00:16:27,240 remember we briefly touched on the fact that if you come from a different 187 00:16:27,240 --> 00:16:30,520 country like India and you come to the US or Europe or another country even 188 00:16:30,520 --> 00:16:36,160 Australia and you you retain some of that cultural identity and you take on and 189 00:16:36,160 --> 00:16:39,960 assimilate to the new culture you're creating this whole new hybrid this whole 190 00:16:39,960 --> 00:16:44,240 new cultural hybrid identity blending the elements from various cultures 191 00:16:44,240 --> 00:16:48,360 together you might just be a traveler traveling the world and picking up parts 192 00:16:48,360 --> 00:16:52,160 of different cultures and then adapting that to your own culture to your own 193 00:16:52,160 --> 00:16:59,200 identity in your own host country you know so all of these have a profound 194 00:16:59,200 --> 00:17:03,920 influence on shaping your identity and the reason I'm bringing this up and the 195 00:17:03,920 --> 00:17:09,440 whole point of this podcast this topic is to understand that identity is not set 196 00:17:09,440 --> 00:17:13,280 in stone it's dynamic it's ever-changing and it's influenced by everything around 197 00:17:13,280 --> 00:17:18,080 you from a childhood up until now these are elements that you can change about 198 00:17:18,080 --> 00:17:22,240 your life should you want to change them and I'm not advocating you should change 199 00:17:22,240 --> 00:17:26,560 anything but I'm just trying to present to you an idea that identity is not 200 00:17:26,560 --> 00:17:31,960 fixed so you don't have to if you don't like the identity in which you have 201 00:17:31,960 --> 00:17:37,560 right now you can acquire a new identity through new experiences try traveling 202 00:17:37,560 --> 00:17:42,280 try creating an identity based on other cultures that you've visited or are 203 00:17:42,280 --> 00:17:48,400 familiar with even through media I love that media it's both evil and evil and 204 00:17:48,400 --> 00:17:54,600 good at the same time and personal experiences also shape your identity I 205 00:17:54,600 --> 00:17:59,120 mean you could be working with an ethnic group of people that share their 206 00:17:59,120 --> 00:18:04,760 culture with you and it's those personal experiences that help shape your 207 00:18:04,760 --> 00:18:09,720 identity you might take on some of the stuff that they enjoy for example food 208 00:18:09,720 --> 00:18:14,200 maybe you've never been exposed to spicy food and you're you know you're 209 00:18:14,200 --> 00:18:21,560 enjoying food with people from India or Mexico or South America and you start 210 00:18:21,560 --> 00:18:26,480 enjoying the spicy food and that becomes part of who you are a person who seeks 211 00:18:26,480 --> 00:18:32,040 out that spicy taste and food I'm not sure that was a very good analogy but 212 00:18:32,040 --> 00:18:35,440 but I think you get the idea and here's something that you're probably not 213 00:18:35,440 --> 00:18:40,400 completely aware of but these social interactions in our life they're mirrors 214 00:18:40,400 --> 00:18:44,960 they're mirrors in which we see and refine our own identities we look to 215 00:18:44,960 --> 00:18:49,080 others within our society and our culture and our group and we check 216 00:18:49,080 --> 00:18:53,880 ourselves are we acting or behaving in this way should we make a modification 217 00:18:53,880 --> 00:18:58,400 to mirror what that person's behaving like do we revere them do we respect them 218 00:18:58,400 --> 00:19:02,960 do we admire them you know we look at our peers we look at broader social 219 00:19:02,960 --> 00:19:07,720 networks individuals in our group you know that we meet with on occasion or 220 00:19:07,720 --> 00:19:12,400 daily even relatives and it's these relationships and in social roles that 221 00:19:12,400 --> 00:19:16,480 provide a context for the development of our identity and the continuous 222 00:19:16,480 --> 00:19:19,800 development of our identity and we may just completely reject it we may not 223 00:19:19,800 --> 00:19:24,080 like how any of them act and say I want to be somebody different and you and 224 00:19:24,080 --> 00:19:29,160 again you have that choice you see it's not locked or set in stone and another 225 00:19:29,160 --> 00:19:35,480 modern phenomenon for the impact of social interactions on identity is social 226 00:19:35,480 --> 00:19:41,040 networking sites it's like Facebook, TikTok and any other sort of platform 227 00:19:41,040 --> 00:19:45,120 that allows you to share and exchange ideas they intensify the role of social 228 00:19:45,120 --> 00:19:49,360 interactions in the formation of your identity they allow you to experiment 229 00:19:49,360 --> 00:19:53,000 with and manage multiple identities like we've talked about you can be whoever 230 00:19:53,000 --> 00:19:56,440 you want to be online you can have multiple accounts with multiple 231 00:19:56,440 --> 00:20:00,480 identities see which one has the most likes so to speaking like oh I think 232 00:20:00,480 --> 00:20:04,240 I'm gonna be that person today or I'm gonna just adapt that and that doesn't 233 00:20:04,240 --> 00:20:08,680 mean it stays online you can adapt that into your own personal life as well and 234 00:20:08,680 --> 00:20:13,800 I want to reiterate that this isn't my opinion this is information is based on 235 00:20:13,800 --> 00:20:17,680 solid research you know studies and psychology that highlight the identity 236 00:20:17,680 --> 00:20:24,000 formation that that highlight identity formation is on an ongoing process it's 237 00:20:24,000 --> 00:20:28,320 influenced by cognitive development and socialization this is a study done by 238 00:20:28,320 --> 00:20:33,240 the social psychologist Erickson on the stages of identity development even 239 00:20:33,240 --> 00:20:37,520 sociological research emphasizes the role of societal structures in control 240 00:20:37,520 --> 00:20:43,360 cultural context in shaping your identity showing that identity adapts to fit 241 00:20:43,360 --> 00:20:48,360 social roles and expectations let me say that again showing that identity 242 00:20:48,360 --> 00:20:53,360 adapts to fit social roles and expectations so you can simply say 243 00:20:53,360 --> 00:20:56,920 change your social role change your expectation change your identity and 244 00:20:56,920 --> 00:21:00,920 even neuroscientific findings suggest that areas of the brain involved in 245 00:21:00,920 --> 00:21:07,000 memory reasoning and emotional regulation play a very important role in the 246 00:21:07,000 --> 00:21:12,040 ongoing process of the formation of your identity and the reformation of 247 00:21:12,040 --> 00:21:16,200 identity as well so there's a lot of science to back what I'm talking about 248 00:21:16,200 --> 00:21:22,600 so again the key takeaway from this part is that you can change your identity 249 00:21:22,600 --> 00:21:27,000 should you want to it's not set in stone and some people may want to so you're 250 00:21:27,000 --> 00:21:30,560 not stuck in the part and who you are you don't have to give yourself a label 251 00:21:30,560 --> 00:21:33,240 and stay with that label you know you could change your roles you can have 252 00:21:33,240 --> 00:21:38,680 multiple roles but just expand your horizons go out meet new people 253 00:21:38,680 --> 00:21:43,880 experience new experiences connect with international people find what makes you 254 00:21:43,880 --> 00:21:49,000 who you are and adapt that to your life okay folks now I want to turn my 255 00:21:49,000 --> 00:21:53,520 attention to the fluidity of identity and no that's not the name of a best 256 00:21:53,520 --> 00:22:01,600 seller the fluid so identity as we already discussed briefly is very fluid 257 00:22:01,600 --> 00:22:07,120 it's dynamic it's constantly I wouldn't say constantly changing but it does 258 00:22:07,120 --> 00:22:13,600 change and changes frequently but unlike static characteristics that you might 259 00:22:13,600 --> 00:22:20,880 possess identity as I said is dynamic and it's evolving part of human 260 00:22:20,880 --> 00:22:29,200 experience and it changes in response to life's influences and the decisions that 261 00:22:29,200 --> 00:22:35,880 you make in your life so for example if you're making career choices that's 262 00:22:35,880 --> 00:22:39,240 gonna have an impact on your identity if you make religious choices political 263 00:22:39,240 --> 00:22:44,160 choices family choices all of this has an impact on your identity and it's 264 00:22:44,160 --> 00:22:49,320 definitely not fixed at birth but does develop and transform through various 265 00:22:49,320 --> 00:22:54,440 stages of life which is again influenced by your personal choices social 266 00:22:54,440 --> 00:22:59,440 environments and cultural exposures if you feel like I'm repeating this it's 267 00:22:59,440 --> 00:23:03,760 because I'm trying to drive the point home that again identity is not fixed 268 00:23:03,760 --> 00:23:10,240 it's fluid it it changes over time and with experiences and with your own 269 00:23:10,240 --> 00:23:16,360 personal choices so what does this say about you it says that you have that 270 00:23:16,360 --> 00:23:22,280 capability to change your identity to change who you want to be rather than 271 00:23:22,280 --> 00:23:26,560 staying who you are so if you're unhappy with yourself it's only because you 272 00:23:26,560 --> 00:23:31,360 choose to be unhappy with yourself I know it's a lot easier said than done 273 00:23:31,360 --> 00:23:37,400 but the capability exists for you to make that change just be cognizant of 274 00:23:37,400 --> 00:23:41,200 the fact that you can make that change I mean there are psychological theories 275 00:23:41,200 --> 00:23:45,240 as we talked about Erickson Eric Erickson who emphasized that the 276 00:23:45,240 --> 00:23:49,520 evolution of identity takes place through a series of stages you know each 277 00:23:49,520 --> 00:23:53,200 characterized by specific specific challenges and growth opportunities in 278 00:23:53,200 --> 00:23:57,280 your life so it comes down to this here the next time you're going to make a 279 00:23:57,280 --> 00:24:01,040 career change the next time you're gonna make a change in your life consider the 280 00:24:01,040 --> 00:24:05,480 implications that it has on your identity you can pick let's say you move to a 281 00:24:05,480 --> 00:24:10,520 completely new location you can completely change that identity become 282 00:24:10,520 --> 00:24:16,040 somebody different and I'm not saying like change your look and everything but 283 00:24:16,040 --> 00:24:22,600 just change who you are for the better and not necessarily the worst although 284 00:24:22,600 --> 00:24:27,320 some people do change your identity for that make those adjustments you know one 285 00:24:27,320 --> 00:24:32,840 of the big things that helps propel identity shift is a change in your 286 00:24:32,840 --> 00:24:39,760 career there are people that take on a whole different career midlife sometimes 287 00:24:39,760 --> 00:24:44,320 two or three careers that are in completely different industries so they 288 00:24:44,320 --> 00:24:49,320 go through multiple identity changes throughout their entire life and this 289 00:24:49,320 --> 00:24:54,320 affects how they see themselves and how they are perceived by others as well and 290 00:24:54,320 --> 00:25:05,160 as an example let's say you are a janitor at a hospital and you you're 291 00:25:05,160 --> 00:25:11,240 keeping it under wraps so it's natural that people are not going to look up to 292 00:25:11,240 --> 00:25:17,480 a janitor which is sad because to me everybody's equal and a janitor is as 293 00:25:17,480 --> 00:25:25,440 capable as a doctor in terms of you know their existence that being equal being 294 00:25:25,440 --> 00:25:31,200 respected however the majority of people will look at a janitor and not have a 295 00:25:31,200 --> 00:25:35,680 lot of respect for them but let's say you're this janitor and you're putting 296 00:25:35,680 --> 00:25:39,520 yourself through medical school but nobody really knows this and then let's 297 00:25:39,520 --> 00:25:42,360 say four eight years later however long it takes to get through medical school 298 00:25:42,360 --> 00:25:47,440 you come out a doctor now you're doctor so-and-so instead of the janitor so 299 00:25:47,440 --> 00:25:53,920 and so the perspective that people have about you changes drastically even the 300 00:25:53,920 --> 00:25:57,520 perspective you have about yourself because as a janitor you're heavily 301 00:25:57,520 --> 00:26:02,920 influenced your identity is heavily influenced by how people treat you and 302 00:26:02,920 --> 00:26:09,600 talk to you and perceive you it begins to wear on your psyche and you begin to 303 00:26:09,600 --> 00:26:15,080 buy into this identity that I'm just a janitor picking up trash but do a 304 00:26:15,080 --> 00:26:21,800 mind shift become a doctor or become anything else that is respected and then 305 00:26:21,800 --> 00:26:26,640 watch how people perceive you and treat you and watch how your identity shifts 306 00:26:26,640 --> 00:26:32,080 in that area I mean for example you can also have like let's say a former 307 00:26:32,080 --> 00:26:36,600 military officer transitions to a career in the arts I mean you're going from a 308 00:26:36,600 --> 00:26:44,300 combat soldier in theater to an artist the shift not only alters his 309 00:26:44,300 --> 00:26:48,800 professional identity but also affects his personal values in his lifestyle 310 00:26:48,800 --> 00:26:53,880 what does he value now versus what he valued as a military officer this whole 311 00:26:53,880 --> 00:26:59,800 shift in values changes when you shift careers in identity so are you getting a 312 00:26:59,800 --> 00:27:03,640 whole big picture about identity how identity is not a fixed characteristic 313 00:27:03,640 --> 00:27:07,640 it's something that evolves over time it's fluid it can change so I want people 314 00:27:07,640 --> 00:27:11,920 to understand to get away from this notion that you're stuck in being who 315 00:27:11,920 --> 00:27:18,240 you are just because someone says you're ABCD and E that's not true that's what 316 00:27:18,240 --> 00:27:22,000 someone else says about you based on maybe how you perceive yourself or how 317 00:27:22,000 --> 00:27:26,880 you act or from a culture that you come from you can change that by shifting 318 00:27:26,880 --> 00:27:32,440 your mind set and learning new customs new skills new experiences and these 319 00:27:32,440 --> 00:27:36,840 career changes and these these mind shift changes requires new skills and 320 00:27:36,840 --> 00:27:41,400 again requires new mindsets and what they do is they lead to a reassessment of 321 00:27:41,400 --> 00:27:46,520 your personal strengths weaknesses and your overall self-concept and so it's 322 00:27:46,520 --> 00:27:50,920 kind of like a transformation from you know a butterfly from our caterpillar 323 00:27:50,920 --> 00:27:55,560 to a butterfly so you're becoming a butterfly I'm not sure if you want to 324 00:27:55,560 --> 00:27:59,400 be a butterfly hey butterflies are cool I love butterflies but you get my point 325 00:27:59,400 --> 00:28:03,560 right and then become an apparent I mean that completely I remember when I became 326 00:28:03,560 --> 00:28:07,960 a parent I lived life almost now I wouldn't say reckless but I was more risk 327 00:28:07,960 --> 00:28:13,800 taking I took risks a lot before I had a child when I had a child I began to drive 328 00:28:13,800 --> 00:28:20,280 like a little old lady from Pasadena you know in the slow lane I didn't it's like 329 00:28:20,280 --> 00:28:24,080 I wanted to be very cautious extra cautious you know having a kid in a car 330 00:28:24,080 --> 00:28:28,200 so it changed my whole identity on who I was this this risk-taker who would ski 331 00:28:28,200 --> 00:28:32,320 you know slopes that were steep you know double the black diamonds it didn't 332 00:28:32,320 --> 00:28:36,640 really matter I would take risk I've flown off cliffs with quads and broke my 333 00:28:36,640 --> 00:28:41,200 collarbone I've done all kinds of crazy things but then when the kid came along 334 00:28:41,200 --> 00:28:45,280 it's like you know what I'd better slow down so I there's a major identity shift 335 00:28:45,280 --> 00:28:49,120 and the same thing happens with almost every parent you know they go from 336 00:28:49,120 --> 00:28:54,440 living one way being one way having one set of values to having a completely 337 00:28:54,440 --> 00:28:58,600 different set of values they'll go from I'm partying every night to I'm not gonna 338 00:28:58,600 --> 00:29:02,840 party at all now some people still party when they have kids they don't care but 339 00:29:02,840 --> 00:29:07,720 you know you get you get the idea and we touched on this too significant 340 00:29:07,720 --> 00:29:11,920 personal experiences such as like moving to a whole new country I mean if I moved 341 00:29:11,920 --> 00:29:15,880 if I moved away from the US and then to you know maybe a Scandinavian country I 342 00:29:15,880 --> 00:29:20,360 would have a completely complete identity shift I would want to adapt and 343 00:29:20,360 --> 00:29:25,400 assimilate to their culture and become you know one of the locals so to speak 344 00:29:25,400 --> 00:29:31,560 even though I'm not originally from let's say Finland or Iceland I would want 345 00:29:31,560 --> 00:29:36,200 to adapt to their culture to kind of assimilate and blend in with them you know 346 00:29:36,200 --> 00:29:40,480 I would retain some of my culture but that that move will have a significant 347 00:29:40,480 --> 00:29:44,560 change on your identity and you have to adapt to their laws and also their 348 00:29:44,560 --> 00:29:48,320 cultures so I mean it's almost like a forced I mean you can live in isolation 349 00:29:48,320 --> 00:29:50,520 I guess but that would be kind of boring what's the point of moving to another 350 00:29:50,520 --> 00:29:55,760 country I mean if you pick a place you want to go live even Canada I love I 351 00:29:55,760 --> 00:29:58,760 would love to live in Canada you know I don't think they're I mean I think 352 00:29:58,760 --> 00:30:02,400 they're different than people from the United States but you know they have a 353 00:30:02,400 --> 00:30:09,960 different identity in a different mindset but but nevertheless moving to 354 00:30:09,960 --> 00:30:16,440 Canada would definitely shift my mind and my identity I would want to do as the 355 00:30:16,440 --> 00:30:23,320 Canadians do so to speak so recognizing the fluid nature of identity can lead 356 00:30:23,320 --> 00:30:28,880 you to a greater self-acceptance and greater flexibility in your personal 357 00:30:28,880 --> 00:30:34,640 growth understanding that it's fluid that it's not rigid that you're able to 358 00:30:34,640 --> 00:30:39,240 make that change and you can if you want to based on your all-life 359 00:30:39,240 --> 00:30:44,520 experiences culture current environment it will lead you to greater self- 360 00:30:44,520 --> 00:30:48,680 acceptance and that's where we want to be we want to accept ourselves we want 361 00:30:48,680 --> 00:30:52,920 to be flexible in our personal growth we want to be able to grow and shift our 362 00:30:52,920 --> 00:30:58,240 mindsets become better people not necessarily buy into this ideology that 363 00:30:58,240 --> 00:31:01,760 you're born with a certain identity and you're gonna die with that identity 364 00:31:01,760 --> 00:31:05,000 that's like putting you into a box if you like to be in a box by all means 365 00:31:05,000 --> 00:31:11,200 stay in that box don't come out but if if you want to be outside of that box be 366 00:31:11,200 --> 00:31:18,120 a free thinker be fluid and dynamic as a human being be the best that you can be 367 00:31:18,120 --> 00:31:24,120 and embrace the fact that identity is fluid it's constantly changing and you 368 00:31:24,120 --> 00:31:28,920 can constantly make that change and understanding that identity can change 369 00:31:28,920 --> 00:31:34,400 provides a framework for you for coping with life's uncertainties and challenges 370 00:31:34,400 --> 00:31:40,120 so you go into a new job you go into a new place to live you're not locked in 371 00:31:40,120 --> 00:31:46,400 to who you were you are now able to change and adapt to that environment and 372 00:31:46,400 --> 00:31:51,760 that's perfectly okay and also embracing fluidity and identity allows you to adapt 373 00:31:51,760 --> 00:31:59,200 more readily to changing circumstances and to explore new aspects of yourself 374 00:31:59,200 --> 00:32:05,680 and very healthy and in an open-minded manner versus having to struggle there's 375 00:32:05,680 --> 00:32:09,880 a lot of people that struggle with identity change with adapting to new 376 00:32:09,880 --> 00:32:13,440 environments because they don't think they I don't think they understand that 377 00:32:13,440 --> 00:32:17,280 identity is fluid they can make that change that they have to be stuck in 378 00:32:17,280 --> 00:32:21,120 their old ways and that is not true that is something that's taught to you that 379 00:32:21,120 --> 00:32:28,440 is an unrealistic belief it is it is a 100% false you have that power to make 380 00:32:28,440 --> 00:32:33,600 that identity change for yourself to better yourself become more open-minded 381 00:32:33,600 --> 00:32:39,000 and to be more self accepting of yourself so far we've been identifying 382 00:32:39,000 --> 00:32:45,440 ways that individuals you myself can make a change in our identity by maybe 383 00:32:45,440 --> 00:32:50,440 moving to a new country doing a career shift career change shifting our 384 00:32:50,440 --> 00:32:54,880 perspective gaining new experiences learning about other cultures in a 385 00:32:54,880 --> 00:33:00,360 plethora of other reasons however society also plays a role in identity 386 00:33:00,360 --> 00:33:05,160 informing your identity too and societal roles serves as frameworks that 387 00:33:05,160 --> 00:33:11,440 significantly influence our identity by setting these expectations for behavior 388 00:33:11,440 --> 00:33:16,560 for responsibilities of these roles and interactions I mean you have roles such 389 00:33:16,560 --> 00:33:22,320 as parent professionals you know doctors teachers students and even community 390 00:33:22,320 --> 00:33:27,480 members they come with very specific expectations we talked about this early 391 00:33:27,480 --> 00:33:31,560 on if you're a doctor or if you're a police officer there's a suit there's a 392 00:33:31,560 --> 00:33:37,880 certain set of expectations and norms that shape how people perceive themselves 393 00:33:37,880 --> 00:33:43,800 these professionals and how others perceive them I mean and adhering to or 394 00:33:43,800 --> 00:33:50,360 rebelling against these roles can define your self concept and influence your 395 00:33:50,360 --> 00:33:56,080 personal decisions and life trajectories by doing so for example professional 396 00:33:56,080 --> 00:34:01,280 roles they often dictate a substantial part of your identity right I mean if 397 00:34:01,280 --> 00:34:07,160 you're a broker stockbroker if your cashier it dictates a substantial part 398 00:34:07,160 --> 00:34:13,560 of your identity it influence your self-esteem your daily routines and your 399 00:34:13,560 --> 00:34:19,920 social status as much as I dislike social status unfortunately we can't get away 400 00:34:19,920 --> 00:34:25,920 from that in professionals or career roles play a big important impact or a 401 00:34:25,920 --> 00:34:30,640 part of your social status some societies you know revere certain 402 00:34:30,640 --> 00:34:35,440 professions more than other societies might for example a doctor or teacher 403 00:34:35,440 --> 00:34:39,440 may integrate their professional responsibilities deeply into their 404 00:34:39,440 --> 00:34:44,000 personal identity which affects how they interact even outside of their 405 00:34:44,000 --> 00:34:49,080 professional environment they'll carry that over with them from their job to the 406 00:34:49,080 --> 00:34:53,480 outside world so to speak in changing your professional career let's say you 407 00:34:53,480 --> 00:34:57,880 go from a doctor to a teacher maybe become a professor at a university that 408 00:34:57,880 --> 00:35:02,600 leads to a definitely a significant identity shift as you take on this new 409 00:35:02,600 --> 00:35:06,760 role you may align you know or have conflict with your pre-existing 410 00:35:06,760 --> 00:35:10,280 personal values and self-perceptions you will go in from a doctor to a professor 411 00:35:10,280 --> 00:35:14,200 I don't know what would be better to me they're both equal you know as far as 412 00:35:14,200 --> 00:35:17,800 career paths are concerned one works on people one well they both work on people 413 00:35:17,800 --> 00:35:21,320 right help people one educationally the other one you know physically medically 414 00:35:21,320 --> 00:35:26,560 but maybe it changes your perception of which one is better I don't know that 415 00:35:26,560 --> 00:35:30,560 that really comes down to the individual right I don't value either one more or 416 00:35:30,560 --> 00:35:35,600 less I think they're both important gender roles historically ingrained in 417 00:35:35,600 --> 00:35:41,560 societal expectations play a crucial role in shaping identity from a young age 418 00:35:41,560 --> 00:35:47,320 boys do this girls do that but what if we seen over the last decade or two 419 00:35:47,320 --> 00:35:55,840 decades we've seen gender identity emerge into a plethora of different forms of 420 00:35:55,840 --> 00:36:01,440 identity you know we've got this whole pronoun thing going you know it's them 421 00:36:01,440 --> 00:36:06,480 them they I think that's kind of odd it's like messing with the English language 422 00:36:06,480 --> 00:36:13,680 to begin with but we have this whole whole personal pronoun how you identify 423 00:36:13,680 --> 00:36:18,280 as a gender and again it's your free choice you are free to choose whatever 424 00:36:18,280 --> 00:36:23,240 gender identity role you want to do that's you know to your heart's content 425 00:36:23,240 --> 00:36:30,000 hallelujah I'm good with that but don't get upset if somebody misidentifies you 426 00:36:30,000 --> 00:36:35,240 because the majority of people the majority of people on this planet fall 427 00:36:35,240 --> 00:36:42,880 prey to societal cultural norms when it comes to gender identity man and woman 428 00:36:42,880 --> 00:36:47,400 take a look at the Middle East take a look at Asian cultures they believe 429 00:36:47,400 --> 00:36:52,960 women have one type of identity whereas in the West the identity of a woman is 430 00:36:52,960 --> 00:36:57,520 more open and somewhat equal to a man and so what does all this mean I mean 431 00:36:57,520 --> 00:37:02,960 societal expectations about gender roles they influence our personal choices 432 00:37:02,960 --> 00:37:07,880 their influence our personal choices in education career and even our hobbies 433 00:37:07,880 --> 00:37:13,240 which impacts yes our self-esteem and our opportunities for personal growth go 434 00:37:13,240 --> 00:37:16,600 to the Middle East go to Afghanistan that you know the Taliban they don't 435 00:37:16,600 --> 00:37:22,880 believe that women should be educated a lot of Islamic countries don't believe 436 00:37:22,880 --> 00:37:26,600 that women should be educated although that's come a long way now so I take 437 00:37:26,600 --> 00:37:32,000 that back not every one of them do but there are some extreme Islamic beliefs 438 00:37:32,000 --> 00:37:37,200 that don't believe women should you know have a have an education and what 439 00:37:37,200 --> 00:37:40,720 about some Asian cultures where they believe the women are even African 440 00:37:40,720 --> 00:37:44,880 cultures where they believe the woman is subservient to the man try that here in 441 00:37:44,880 --> 00:37:50,800 the United States watch it watch you get belted with a frying pan if you if you 442 00:37:50,800 --> 00:37:55,160 tell that to a woman an American woman but again that's that really comes down 443 00:37:55,160 --> 00:37:59,960 to how the society is set up in the expectations and the cultural expectations 444 00:37:59,960 --> 00:38:05,560 you know in in the Middle East or Africa the woman from a child is gonna say 445 00:38:05,560 --> 00:38:07,800 well you know I'm gonna grow up be married I gotta take care of the household 446 00:38:07,800 --> 00:38:11,440 feed my husband and you know do all the household chores and child rearing 447 00:38:11,440 --> 00:38:14,680 whereas in the West are like I'm not gonna raise my child I'm with someone else 448 00:38:14,680 --> 00:38:17,600 raise it I'm gonna have a career and I'm gonna be the boss of the house 449 00:38:17,600 --> 00:38:21,280 completely different I know because I have this argument with my wife all the 450 00:38:21,280 --> 00:38:29,680 time oh boy I mean in a few challenge traditional gender roles that can lead 451 00:38:29,680 --> 00:38:34,400 to a significant identity shift in this indefinite pushback by society which 452 00:38:34,400 --> 00:38:40,960 can have societal consequences as well I mean even some Christian churches are 453 00:38:40,960 --> 00:38:48,640 very strict in the way they view gender roles between a man and a woman and 454 00:38:48,640 --> 00:38:54,400 completely negate any other type of gender gender identity so I mean again it 455 00:38:54,400 --> 00:38:59,880 comes down to where you're from you know your belief system your experiences and 456 00:38:59,880 --> 00:39:03,480 all that I say you can be anything you want to be be whatever you want to be be 457 00:39:03,480 --> 00:39:08,520 whatever gender you want to be it doesn't really matter you're gonna die anyway 458 00:39:08,520 --> 00:39:13,400 I mean we're all gonna that's a that's a guarantee so might as well just enjoy 459 00:39:13,400 --> 00:39:16,680 your life and be who you want to be right you know and there's a and there's a 460 00:39:16,680 --> 00:39:23,640 real negative downside to just not just gender identity but to just general 461 00:39:23,640 --> 00:39:29,480 identity based on your cultural upbringing there's a general societal 462 00:39:29,480 --> 00:39:36,000 pressure to conform because what happens if you don't conform to these certain 463 00:39:36,000 --> 00:39:39,960 identity roles they can impact your personal identity formation and your 464 00:39:39,960 --> 00:39:43,800 mental health can you imagine women that are subservient that don't want to be 465 00:39:43,800 --> 00:39:48,000 subservient how that impacts their mental health how that impacts their 466 00:39:48,000 --> 00:39:53,840 life I mean on the one hand don't get me wrong on the one hand conforming to 467 00:39:53,840 --> 00:39:57,600 societal expectations can provide a sense of belonging you know what I mean 468 00:39:57,600 --> 00:40:02,680 and a sense of approval from your culture if that's what you're looking for but it 469 00:40:02,680 --> 00:40:05,800 can also suppress your individuality and your personal growth and I think here 470 00:40:05,800 --> 00:40:10,720 in the West we all push for individuality you know we all want to be 471 00:40:10,720 --> 00:40:16,560 individual individuals we want to be seen as somebody you know unique next to 472 00:40:16,560 --> 00:40:22,720 the next person we want to be our own person not like a cookie cutter part of 473 00:40:22,720 --> 00:40:28,160 a identity that's you know part of some society or culture that's all doing the 474 00:40:28,160 --> 00:40:33,200 same thing and that's where the conflict really a lot really lies when we start to 475 00:40:33,200 --> 00:40:37,960 go against what other cultural cultural norms are and I think that's a big 476 00:40:37,960 --> 00:40:43,480 problem between the West and the Middle East and the and the East is that we 477 00:40:43,480 --> 00:40:49,760 revere women I mean we look at women as equal and we allow them to be you know 478 00:40:49,760 --> 00:40:55,880 in positions of power whereas the Middle East in the the Far East Asia they 479 00:40:55,880 --> 00:41:00,800 don't do that as much you know and there's a theoretical and practical 480 00:41:00,800 --> 00:41:06,480 implication of identity fluid fluidity I mean there's various psychological and 481 00:41:06,480 --> 00:41:09,680 sociological theories that provide frameworks for understanding how 482 00:41:09,680 --> 00:41:17,440 identities form evolve and influence our behavior so whether you come from a 483 00:41:17,440 --> 00:41:24,720 culture that's one way or you come from a like like a middle like an eastern 484 00:41:24,720 --> 00:41:28,160 culture or if you come from a Western culture again we're gonna go back to 485 00:41:28,160 --> 00:41:33,000 Eric Erickson stages of cycle cycle social development and James Marcia's 486 00:41:33,000 --> 00:41:37,040 identity status theory which explain identity formation as a dynamic process 487 00:41:37,040 --> 00:41:44,600 influenced by personal crises and commitment again they hypothesize that 488 00:41:44,600 --> 00:41:49,600 your own personal identity is a culmination of your personal crises 489 00:41:49,600 --> 00:41:54,360 occurrences in your life and the commitments that you make and sociological 490 00:41:54,360 --> 00:41:59,040 insights push the ideology that social structures and cultural conditions 491 00:41:59,040 --> 00:42:02,920 shape and sometimes constrain individual identities I mean there's 492 00:42:02,920 --> 00:42:07,440 different perspectives and theories of identity but the bottom line is with 493 00:42:07,440 --> 00:42:14,040 identity it is shaped and reshaped through ongoing constant social 494 00:42:14,040 --> 00:42:18,880 interactions and the negotiation of roles in various contexts when I say the 495 00:42:18,880 --> 00:42:24,720 negotiation of roles I'm talking about how we deal with different roles and 496 00:42:24,720 --> 00:42:30,720 society and the dynamics of identity negotiation are very important for 497 00:42:30,720 --> 00:42:34,720 understanding personal adaptations and environments like you know the workplace 498 00:42:34,720 --> 00:42:39,720 educational institutions and social groups I mean it's really important these 499 00:42:39,720 --> 00:42:46,240 these these I would say are breeding grounds or training grounds for our 500 00:42:46,240 --> 00:42:51,680 identity development in most people and I would say it almost everybody and 501 00:42:51,680 --> 00:42:58,280 even even social media modern technology has transformed how identities are 502 00:42:58,280 --> 00:43:02,960 formed and how they're presented and how they're perceived I mean here you you 503 00:43:02,960 --> 00:43:08,280 have social media you can have curated personas which impact your self 504 00:43:08,280 --> 00:43:14,160 perception and social interactions that's pretty powerful if you could be one 505 00:43:14,160 --> 00:43:18,120 person as we've discussed earlier in the physical world and come to the digital 506 00:43:18,120 --> 00:43:22,840 world and completely fabricated different identity but here's the kicker with 507 00:43:22,840 --> 00:43:28,440 that the digital age actually introduced challenges that are related to privacy 508 00:43:28,440 --> 00:43:35,280 authenticity and the psychological impact of online interactions on identity 509 00:43:35,280 --> 00:43:41,520 meaning that we have a whole host of issues when dealing with social media 510 00:43:41,520 --> 00:43:46,200 and identity and the authenticity of people look at the catfishers the people 511 00:43:46,200 --> 00:43:50,560 out there trying to catfish the lonely hearts the people that are looking for 512 00:43:50,560 --> 00:43:55,960 love or the scammers you know or the bullies all of these have come into play 513 00:43:55,960 --> 00:44:00,320 and helped shape identity and this is why it's really important to understand 514 00:44:00,320 --> 00:44:06,120 that identity is fluid and you can make that change you don't have to fall prey 515 00:44:06,120 --> 00:44:12,800 to some sort of societal norm or core or cultural norms you can generate your 516 00:44:12,800 --> 00:44:19,080 own path you can you can create your own healthy sense of self your own healthy 517 00:44:19,080 --> 00:44:24,560 identity and I believe by truly understanding identity fluidity you can 518 00:44:24,560 --> 00:44:31,480 enhance your personal life you can create you can enhance organizational dynamics 519 00:44:31,480 --> 00:44:38,120 leadership approaches and personal development if you understand the 520 00:44:38,120 --> 00:44:46,200 fluidity of identity it can help improve so much in life it can help improve the 521 00:44:46,200 --> 00:44:52,880 work environment it can help improve the the the home life environment the 522 00:44:52,880 --> 00:44:56,840 perfect you know any other the academic environment by just understanding 523 00:44:56,840 --> 00:45:01,840 identity fluidity because what it really comes down to is that leaders who appreciate 524 00:45:01,840 --> 00:45:06,440 and accommodate the fluid nature of employee identities can foster 525 00:45:06,440 --> 00:45:12,200 inclusivity adaptability and resilience and embracing philosophical and 526 00:45:12,200 --> 00:45:17,920 psychological insights into identity can empower individuals to navigate lives 527 00:45:17,920 --> 00:45:23,360 changes more effectively which is very important and it promotes a healthier and 528 00:45:23,360 --> 00:45:28,320 more authentic life and I think the key here to getting along with people to 529 00:45:28,320 --> 00:45:36,560 really be in liked to be being a leader to be an accepted is to be authentic be 530 00:45:36,560 --> 00:45:40,520 true to yourself okay folks this brings us to the end of our show you know I 531 00:45:40,520 --> 00:45:44,200 encourage you to reflect on your own identity take a look at it take a take a 532 00:45:44,200 --> 00:45:49,360 self-examination of who you are in how you portray yourself and how you're 533 00:45:49,360 --> 00:45:55,120 perceived you know at work at home in your community consider the various roles 534 00:45:55,120 --> 00:46:00,580 you inhabit and how they have shaped your sense of self and think about the 535 00:46:00,580 --> 00:46:06,800 times your identity has shifted and what triggered those changes if you're 536 00:46:06,800 --> 00:46:10,920 interested in a deeper dive into identity I recommend reading Eric Erickson's 537 00:46:10,920 --> 00:46:16,320 work on identity development exploring peer-boudoirs theories of social 538 00:46:16,320 --> 00:46:20,840 practice and engaging with the existential writings of Jean-Paul Sartre 539 00:46:20,840 --> 00:46:27,280 these guys have all talked about identity and I want to thank you from the 540 00:46:27,280 --> 00:46:33,720 bottom of my heart if you've stuck with me this far I really appreciate you and 541 00:46:33,720 --> 00:46:39,040 I'm really hoping that you're gaining some insights from these podcasts that 542 00:46:39,040 --> 00:46:45,960 can help you become a better person a better thinker and realize that life has 543 00:46:45,960 --> 00:46:54,200 no scripts I'm Alan Stafford until next time this is life unscripted