And what is up, YouTube?
Welcome back to the U.H.
Shit podcast. No, that ain't it.
Podcast. I'm Rob.
Why are you yelling? I'm sorry.
I just felt like I had to get it out of my cyst.
You got a cyst. Where is it?
You got a bump. I was trying to you got a bump in the knotty spot.
Bump in the night. Nope.
I was trying to I was trying to shorten system in it.
I ate my words.
But you said cyst. Yeah, I did.
It has me slightly concerned.
I do have this big like bulbous cyst on my butt, dude, lately.
And it hurts. Yeah.
You got a bulbous sore on your ass.
Bulbasaurus. No, I don't have any.
Bulbasaurus Rex, man. I don't have a cyst.
What's that cyst on your neck, though?
Oh, I have like an ingrown hair on my neck.
Dude, thing looks like it's barking.
Fucking crater. Shits barking.
Tell that thing to quit fucking looking at me, dude.
I don't like when people stare at me.
What's your name? I'm Rob.
I'm Steve and I'm Jay.
Welcome back to the.
Fuck you, dude. All right.
Sorry. So so
I want to kick this off the right the right way.
No. Well, yeah, sure. Yeah.
But the right wing.
I want to kick this off.
Where's that fucking button that for him, Jay?
Yeah, we're going to fucking.
Bitch. OK.
So last.
Sunday was the Super Bowl.
Yep. Super Bowl Sunday. Super Bowl Sunday.
Inside job. Yeah.
Time out before we get to the inside job part.
What do you think of the halftime show?
I don't want to say it on camera. Say it.
I almost went gay for a man.
OK, I didn't expect you.
When Usher ripped that shirt off, dude.
Got bricked.
Yep. What about you, Steve?
Like I saw your wandering eyes when you came over.
No, honestly, I wasn't a fan of the halftime show.
I actually looked he like actually thought it was fire.
He killed it. Really?
Uh huh. I thought it was good.
Usher, like out of every.
I don't know.
Usher, like out of every.
Artists that fucking did something, Usher was the worst.
No, I disagree.
I totally disagree.
I think there's been way worse halftime shows.
I didn't say that.
I was more in the halftime show.
I would that would be fire.
But I said every artist that they had at the halftime show,
this last one, because there was like Lil Jon and.
Yeah, Luda. Luda.
I thought it was fire, though, for real.
No, I'm saying Usher was the worst.
Shout out Ludacris. I disagree.
He was the man of the hour.
Why the fuck is Rob just glazing right now?
I'm not. You asked me my opinion.
I thought it was good. Literally sticking up.
It is peace. Hey, town.
OK, I'm not doing that anymore.
That was the last one. That game legitimately pissed me off, though.
For real. And honestly, this whole season, dude, just watching the NFL.
Kind of like I already stopped watching college football, to be honest.
Why? I feel like it's the least.
Well, no, I don't I don't necessarily agree with college players being paid.
Oh, but we get the NCAA game back.
So wait, they're paying college players now.
Well, they they legally like they
change the NCAA regulations on
like endorsements.
Oh, so they can actually get schools don't pay them, but they can get endorsed
by Nike or something. Yeah, by anybody. Crazy.
Yeah, they can get they can get paid a lot of money.
That's kind of cool, though. Well, it is cool.
But the way I've always kind of seen it is you get a free education
and someone's paying for that.
It's not the schools generally, it's like alumni donations,
money that the programs generate.
And a lot of the
a lot of the stuff that they're benefiting from, they had nothing to do with building.
Like they're basically a segment in
a legacy.
You just like looking forward, I'm like,
so the real question is,
what's the quarterback name again?
Oh, Dick Pat McChode. Oh, yeah.
Fucking idiot, dude.
Dick Pat McChode.
Yep. He's the clearest, clearest throat.
He literally talks like he's been fucking the whole time.
He talks like he's been fucking slamming Jones back all night.
He'll do pickles.
Kermit the Frog.
Just bruising that bruising that vulva.
Guys, you see the way I threw that football.
It's true. He has an annoying voice.
He's a fucking.
Who's that? That that.
Did you see that?
He's got an arm on him.
You see the after party of the football or sorry, the after party of the Super Bowl.
No, when Travis Kelsey was singing Garth Brooks.
I actually didn't see it, but I heard about it.
Super trash and Dick Pat McChode comes along
because he thinks he's a fucking cool guy.
He's literally like the child on the team.
What do you do? He's he's a baby.
And he's sitting there.
No, no, no.
He's sitting there trying to Kermit Holmes, trying to tame his friend
from having a good time by hugging his waist from the back.
Oh, he was giving him the old reach around.
Yeah, the old old fashion reach around Francis.
Give him the good old college try.
Gave him the Pope Francis.
Fuck. Yeah.
No, I think it's I think it's pretty set up, though,
unfortunately, because it ruins my hopes and dreams because as a kid.
Yeah. Oh, yeah.
And it's just an ass.
Dude, the thing that pisses me off too is like.
They're already not paying taxes on all the money that they're making as owners.
Nonprofit. Yeah.
And then on top of that, they have to sit there.
And try and generate more funds.
Yeah. By making a TV show.
And yeah, I can literally I think I saw more of T.
Swift on the screen than I did football.
Dude, I saw we're not getting into it.
I am not a Swifty. What the fuck was going on?
Yeah. Not a Swifty. Hey, dude, I actually saw a video.
You can look it up.
It was that last drive they had, I think.
And it was either right before overtime or it was in overtime.
I can't remember.
He didn't get the first.
It said second in eight or something.
Yeah, second in it.
And then they had the camera on like some person was recording
it on the TV or whatever with their phone.
And it went from second and switched back to first.
Legit. Yeah, it's a real thing.
So yeah. Yeah.
Fuck that.
No, it's it's totally rig, bro, unfortunately.
And I don't know how it is and if all of it is, but I don't know, man.
I just feel like I don't know what to believe anymore.
It honestly makes me emotional.
Gets you a little sad. Yeah.
Me sad.
It's the thing that kind of bums me out about it, dude, is like how much joy
I got from playing football when I was younger, like in school and stuff.
And also the life skills and lessons that I learned through that.
Like one of the big ones that my coach always tried to push was integrity.
Yeah. Which there's no integrity in the game anymore.
No. It's unfortunate.
It's really sad.
But the funny thing is, well, I still watch it.
Probably. It makes sense the way they're trying to swoop in the younger generation.
Like they already don't care about things not being real
because like most of them barely even leave their house.
Yeah. You know.
Sad to say. Yeah, I hate to see it.
Hate to see it, folks.
Can we give a shout out, though, to the fucking.
U.S. Olympic curlers on the back.
Yep. Really putting those two hands to work is a life skill.
Dude, they are so.
Are you looking at me like that?
Sound guy can fact check this.
Hey, wake up to to get good at that.
That motion. Yeah.
They are all given free shakeweights.
You know, a thing or two about a shake weight, don't you, bud?
And they're required like two hours a day, like as they're like cooking.
So they're like flipping eggs and they're just sometimes you can work to it
one time like this, like to shake weights. Yeah. Yeah.
Facts. And then, dude, to get like your
a different set of muscles, you go like this sometimes with both of them.
And then if you look up, if you look up, it'll
in it activates your chakras.
Do you think it do you think it?
Do you think it's a good like core exercise
while you're doing that to like get in like a wall sit position?
Oh, yeah. Like no wall.
Oh, yeah. I mean, like squatting down.
Oh, Rob, you should show him.
He was watching videos on like how they strengthen their shoulders
with the shake weights.
Can you show them? So I just did a.
No, no, no. Yeah, but you didn't show him the shoulder.
No. Show them how they work out the shoulders.
Shoulders and curling is huge.
Is that what you mean?
But you didn't put any like arm and wrist.
Yeah, there was no problem.
You guys can picture it. I'm not doing that.
You got your little jester and do tricks for you whenever whenever you want.
Do a trick for daddy.
Do.
Oh, is that all I am to you guys?
Just a dancing jester.
Yep. That's cool.
I'll remember that start watching a lot more like a one trick pony.
You better watch your fucking back.
You need to fucking watch your attitude.
I'm sorry. Facts. Yeah.
You need to wash your back.
All right. Write that down.
Hey, Steve, write that down.
No, yeah, we're open that thing up.
Seriously. Not that.
Oh, that's crazy. What is that?
He just outed himself. Time out.
Time out. He's going rogue.
What's what? Hey, she's going zero dark 30 right now.
Hey, the last last time we got together,
I told you about the two timeouts, right?
Send me the time out and time out like pause.
I'm about to send you to time out.
If I think you got in your hand, what I think you got in your hand.
Just let me explain myself.
OK, I explain myself. Sure.
I explain myself.
Will you let me explain myself?
Do not let me explain myself.
Not sponsored by Zen.
OK, and this is not Zen.
All right.
Can I explain myself? Yeah.
I didn't have.
I didn't have a pouchy. OK.
For two days and it was a really dark time.
No upper deckies for you.
I didn't have any upper deckies for two days and it was a very dark time.
Not going to lie. It sounds rough.
Yeah. But daddy came out on the other end of it.
A rogue bear. Oh, a rogue bear.
Ro.
This is a fuck. This is a fucking man's pouch, by the way.
Look at this fucking bean bag right here.
You bag. Get in there.
Looks like a bag full of pool balls.
One sugar. Dude, I already have one in.
Rob keeps avoiding them. No, they're they're a little.
I feel like I'm being watched by somebody.
If they catch me doing I don't want to get caught in four.
OK, I like it.
I get caught. Yeah, that high def will catch some real shit.
Yeah, they're fire, though, bro.
The only thing that is a little rough.
We got we got a little tossed last night.
No. Yeah, the tequila came out.
And when we woke up. Thanks, Bob.
Yeah, I feel like shit. We're a little hung.
And the smell of these made me look.
Yeah, a little hung. Yeah.
Speak for yourself. Not all of us are hung like you.
Wait, are we talking about the same thing here?
Not not all of us are little. What? Wait.
Wait, we are all little.
Average average. Yeah. Yeah.
Go for it. Continue. Continue.
Yeah.
Sorry.
The smell of this can was nauseating this morning.
Yeah, bro. I actually am super hung over and it hurts slightly.
That's why we got the trans.
The Red Bull to Bubba and water here.
Cheers.
Oh, I'm sorry.
Serious. I didn't.
You didn't even ask for permission. You just shoved it in.
Hey, he called Plum's did it.
It keeps dripping to just soaked the shit out of my water.
Well, that's what I'm thinking of soaking.
Oh, yeah.
We're finally going to get back to it.
I feel like we were talking about soaking.
I think it was.
Was it episode two?
Let us know in the comments if you know what that is.
You sound guy.
Go back and watch the episodes and tell us which one will Rob get in.
Get into it.
Let's unpack it.
Back the soap.
Basically.
Basically soaking. Let's unpack. Soaky time.
It's soaky time.
Soaking time.
Welcome back to soaking time with Rob, Steve and Jay.
No, you're alone in the soaking.
So yeah. Soxash. Yeah.
Hear me out.
I had a D too bad to just sit there.
Hey.
So soaking is basically a loophole in the Mormon community.
Where.
It's called a loophole.
No, no, no. That loopholes are never.
It's not a loophole.
It's a loophole.
I can explain it like that.
But.
But here's the thing.
When, when we do explain it.
On the outside, look again, it's fucking.
Not even it's just.
Might as well just get into it.
But how's it a loophole though?
That's what we got to figure out.
No, no, no.
It's cause you say it.
I saw it on Tik TOK.
And.
I was, I was on the moral remedy.
No, really.
I was on Tik TOK and they were saying that it's a, it's sick.
Cause you can't.
You know.
Your
in reference oh what it's making more sense in my head now yeah so you're not you're not
doing the act it's just soaking you're so like when you're when you when you soak in
the bathtub yeah you just sit in there it's a it's a really gross descriptive term that
makes me a horrible wet environment it's a like it's a light glaze here's the thing
it's not a loophole it's act it's no fucking excuses now it's not a it's it they say it's
a loophole but it's just like dude we know your intentions you dirty dog yeah hitting
devious licks on the low we see it that's what I'm saying so that's what soaking is
do you think any of them call do you think any of them call it honey's hiding hole honey
what honey pot what honey's hiding hole hiding hole ill daddy's little hideaway mmm swimmers
here what did you say you said something about shake they shake the oh yeah they shake the
bed so this is even weirder so they'll be soaking on their bed and then there's other
people in the room and then there's a are you least are you allowed to shoot that okay
I don't know probably not fuck that's home base yep can we can we Google hey sound guy
hey Google image that Google Google the allotment Google image shooting in reference to soaking
now it's so there's this I also heard on tik-tok on like the same video where and this is from
it's some dude that went to the BYU campuses was asking like straight or mid this shit
was going on at BYU it's how they yeah whoa well it's not just there but I know but like
that's where like yeah that's where I saw the videos yeah do you think do you think
fucking the hall monitors like or the RA has come through like what if they walk in they're
like hey they're like oh wait are you moving are you soaking you're good like yeah I asked
you need me to shake the bed for you no yeah that's seriously what they do I'm not even
that is the R is function yeah at BYU they're a residence assistant so basically someone
will go in the room with them or I don't know if it's why I don't know why it would be multiple
people but like you have to sit there and shake literally shake the bed because they're
not the ones moving but yeah movement on the bed makes you you know fuck some weird ass
shit if it looks like a duck it sounds like a duck smells like a duck it's probably a
ducking yeah probably fuck yeah if it looks like a fuck if you're ducking you're fucking
is there a certain amount of like accidental pumps that you're allowed like what if you
sneeze while you're soaking a hashtag no hammer her either I'm not gonna lie to you I was
trying to talk and I didn't hear anything you guys said what I'm serious talking about
a that kung fu grip when that gorilla grip when she sneezes oh my god but is that does
that does that count as an accident well how many accidents do you get in the soak of like
pumping well that would are you allotted like three strikes you're out well I don't know
if I don't know I wouldn't really count as a pump though I don't think because because
he's gonna pump that if she sneezes he's pumping someone's pumping someone's pumping it's not
even that it's this sneezing sneezing is nature's kegel yeah it is no I feel like is it tight
your body yeah it's not her fault that mommy wanted to give it a little squeeze working
on the kegs hey hear me out sorry nature's kegs hashtag no soak stay woke write that
down hey yeah right right down can stay woke soak out there okay stay woke to soak write
it down Steve stop the soak make soaking great again sorry okay now that's enough so but
that is a real thing I'm sure you guys you imagine if Donnie soaked I mean Donnie would
never soak because he's a fucking G he's got that dog in him Trump Oh Donnie 45 honey yeah
Donnie 45 yeah yeah yeah he probably well he's got that dog in him yeah he's like this
but if he did soak you'd never see a greater soaker they say I'm a super soaker hey okay
bars you think Donnie's got bars nobody soaks like me Donnie dog I could soak her in 45
different ways in the oval office in Lincoln's little green room okay Lincoln's green room
what is that come on bro read a fucking book dude damn it hey write it down you're gonna
forget not cool I don't I wish that I liked reading because I would love to be smarter
and like I say you'd like to be smart fuck you but that was aggressive yeah I wish that
I actually liked reading but I get real bored I get fidgety where's your imagination I start
itching I'm like twitching I'm like are you a cyborg do you guys remember reading rainbow
speaking of reading throwback shout out what's that guy's name mr. rainbow shout out T.S.
Elliott they made me think of hooked on lost a real one hooked on chronic no said hooked
on phonics oh and then that made me think of that always hooked on chronic though dr.
Dre is fucking fire hooked on soaking right up your alley bud jays super Mormon by the
way no he is no he converted no to Mormonism no he is no do you think when the bellish
do you think when the garments drop they use it hey hey what do you think when the garments
drop they use it like a drop cloth drip ten okay this is getting out of hand like legit
this is bad fucking grease trap fucking grease trap oh dude damn enough on the soaking topic
now that you guys know what soaking is you're welcome yeah a lot of people do know but for
those who don't if you didn't know now you know what it is what it is what it is just
a little dip anyways hooked on bonnet for me hey what's that comedian hooked on bubonic
what's what's that comedian Brian Regan his hooked on his hooked on phonics bit that shit
is I didn't see it hilarious let me see let's watch the whole thing right now it's so fucking
funny this fucking curling is ridiculous dude those pants are kind of sick like for real
they're a little cool he's fucking posed bro he's praying he's praying to Allah dude I
feel like Loki if you do a sport like curling you are a soaker you got fucking you have
a background in soaking for sure prime USDA approved soaker a prime soaker
yo speaking of Allah like Akbar Allah Akbar Hussein damn what I'm just trying to find
this video you guys are over fucking saying shit like that come on yeah I didn't say it
I'm just talking about it literally said it no but I didn't make it up I'm not the one
causing re fucking havoc and wreaking havoc wreaking havoc that's what I was trying to
say you just don't speak English yeah I do partially what are you looking up Jay that
Brian Regan bit gotcha this shit's so funny I feel like I who's Brian Regan
is but I saw the girl that was hooked on it she's got a problem with it apparently have
you seen that commercial hooked on phonics work for me she's adorable you know I was
thinking wouldn't that be weird if she was applying what she learned and she couldn't
get the commercial straight you know okay cut I've never heard that before Brian Regan's
fucking hilarious our IP dude what if what if he was witnessing a I'm kidding I don't
think he's dead I just said that if that's not funny speak up whatever you saying my
bad Steve's gonna hit you go for it not the hitting but what you were saying no you're
really not gonna say it but since we were on the conspiracies of the rigged NFL what
else do you guys got on that topic full circle do you guys have any moon landing or 9-11
conspiracies I will say I watched this documentary touchy tops I don't think it I think I watched
it on Netflix a long ass time ago I don't think it's on there anymore because you know
everybody got woke or something but it's called loose change oh bro I think that shit was
pretty fucking wild and I will say it just makes you think what was the topic though
9-11 okay it was all about the show 9-11 who's saying who's saying bolt is that who we're
talking about here Allah Akbar who's saying bolt no really oh no is that not it no oh
how's that can rob it's hard to drink out of you fucking kung fu grip that shit bro I
didn't Steve reached over and with his gorilla gave it a little squoze I fucking hit it with
the painter hand dude he put that gorilla grip to use all right 9-11 you're the one
with those fucking catcher mitts over there and we remember we established last night
he's got baby hands I don't even have baby hands dude they're pretty small just put them
up Robin let the people decide it's like if he let's say you go to McDonald's okay you
get a double cheeseburger just looking like my hands came out of a happy meal higher
though average yeah average Bob when he holds one hands are so small that tiny little average
Mickey D's double chi looks like a fucking six by six animal style from in and out like
looks like a lot in and out of a fucking burger because his hands are so tiny do you think
Mormons know what in and out is because they soak what because you're not going in and
out of nothing you're just sitting there no it's it's in and stay put you know what that
was like part of your car yeah it's like parking your car yeah I didn't expect you to say like
parallel parking parallel parking and I straight up think that I can we go back to the topic
of 9-eleven or just conspiracies I love a good conspiracy I actually have a crazy it's
a little in depth and it's not my own conspiracy we have a whole hour the floor is yours go
and honestly I don't think that I necessarily believe it but it definitely is something
that when you listen to it it's kind of crazy okay so there's supposedly this thing called
the black eagle fund which you can google this and find it everything I'm about to say
you can google and there's at least a person out there that wrote something about it like
I said I don't I don't know if it's true yeah but the black eagle fund is supposedly recovered
Nazi gold that the OSS didn't tell anybody about which the OSS used to be army intelligence
that was the precursor to the CIA which got established after the National Security Act
in 1947 you can look that up you're like I'm not capping you might fucking learn something
Rob listen up no cap huh yeah no cap so supposedly the gold allegedly the gold that they found
was Steve's all of a sudden Australian over a billion dollars and because they didn't
report it to anybody it was never on the books except for where they deposited the gold which
was supposedly at the Swiss bank yep like UBS mm-hmm I think is what it's called I
don't actually know I don't know much of anything it's one of the biggest financial institutions
in the world currently today but that part would actually make sense why they would put
it in a Swiss bank because while the CIA was being established the CIA through Operation
Paperclip which was the employment of 1800 Nazi scientists in all different avenues of
science like biology chemistry they had like rocket scientists obviously was the establishment
of NASA their first director was Werner von Braun oh really yeah who built the V2 rockets
that leveled fucking London yeah big-time Nazi harsh anyways so aggressive through Operation
Paperclip I think his name's Reinhard Gehr good to have you back Jay your heart or something
like that he was the intelligence general on the Eastern Front so he was fighting Russia
during World War two your mics not on yeah what the fuck are we talking about we're talking
about conspiracy and 11 I'm explaining how the black eagle funder yeah that got developed
so stick around sorry where the fuck was I I don't know sorry I don't know oh yeah the
CIA employed that Nazi general and they established what they oh Glenland Glenan Glen oh John
Glen no Glenland is his last name they called it the Glenland organization which later turned
into the German BND which is their state ran intelligence service like Dave and Buster's
yeah shut up so it makes sense why they would use the Swiss bank because at the time we
were reconstructing Germany and so they were under our thumb and it would be a perfect
place to hide it because the US wouldn't be looking there but supposedly the physical
ledger that basically proved that money in their system was not digitized and in 2001
September 12th supposedly allegedly oh boy that bank was supposed to digitize everything
in their system and someone would have had to come forward to claim that money which
would have proven the existence of it yeah there was a naval intelligence team of 33
people that were actually investigating that very fund they're investigating it out of
the Pentagon and then a month before the towers dropped they switched their office to the
same floor right next to the bank's office which supposedly is the same floor that people
testified hearing an explosion to oh for real and the very floor that the first plane hit
something's fishy and guess what 32 of those 33 naval employees were there that day okay
that's kind of fucking wild actually right so the physical ledger that if it existed
or if the black eagle fund is real would have been in that bank yeah and then it doesn't
exist the second that that happens yeah that's a little weird right so I've always full touchy
it is a toughy touchy subject definitely and the crazy thing is is that the bushes are
extremely wrapped up in that money if it is real because George HW Bush Daddy Bush was
the director of the CIA in 1989 I think well now tell me the but there are those is that
the family that invented Bush's baked beans no Bush beer yep bushy hold on pause both
of those are you like Bush you're a bushy guy aren't you know do you like the beer huh
why are you looking at me crazy dude because the words coming out of your mouth are fucking
do you actually like Bush I mean I'll drink it if it's in front of me but you know I'll
take a curse curse what's your fate besides I never mind that's banquet's the best cheap
beer of all time by far I will drink others and they didn't didn't do any of that stupid
woke shit that like Bud Light was doing sorry I'm not trying to offend anybody it was pretty
dumb though people people sell out that's all it is man business standpoint like they
lost a fuck ton of business yeah I'm not trying to be if that was dumb I'm sorry but hey 90%
of the people that drink your fucking beer are the exact opposite of what you just fucking
we're talking to well they backpedaled a lot too oh yeah like this is a very touchy subject
to but someone's got to talk about it I don't know I just think I just think when maybe
that's the problem maybe the problem is is that everybody's got your dirty dick beaters
off my thing surrounding the only thing I have an issue with like you can like you like
love you whatever but you got to stop shoving it down people's throats that's all I'm saying
that's just all it is so then again like do your thing nobody cares like do it we love
you but you don't got to make me force you don't got to force me to believe or think
like you do let's just make sure that everything you want to fucking talk to me about is consensual
but yeah uh yeah because it could get stupid um preach it Steve you know it's really funny
this is actually something that pisses me the fuck off dude tell me tell me when people
so someone comes up non-consensually and wants to talk to you right yep they say some fucking
dumb shit not even like rude just like stuff that doesn't make sense and you're like like
what you got a touch of the tism but but their offense to your reaction because everything
in life has cause and effect right yep a lot of people like kov magraw a lot of people
don't understand that they want to like say something to you and then you're like you're
a fucking idiot yeah and then they're like oh my god dude i can't believe you said that
and i'm like i can't believe you said what you said and they're like it wasn't bad and
i'm like i don't care i didn't want to hear it yeah yeah fuck you is that what is that
one of your ticks yeah that's a good it reminds me of uh we went down to uh the steelhead
game like a month or two ago me you and nick did they throw salmon on the ice no i fucking
love when they do that this was before like we were walking to the game and oh yeah i
hit my vape and then this i don't know if he was homeless he was on a bike he was pretty
he just looked a little he was pretty under the weather there's no roof above his head
unfortunately he kept trying to he's outside yeah he kept telling he kept telling me to
give him my vape because he wanted to hit it but he was being like he was scratching
at his skin hella hella pushy he's fucking pushing about it's no really no really for
real and he called him like a prick he's like you fucking prick yeah like bro i'm like okay
asking for a cigarette is different because i can like i can give you the cigarette and
i don't have to touch it again yeah you're gone fucking chill dirty hands before i beat
you with the sandwich yeah this the vape is like no this goes back in my pocket and then
i put my mouth on it yeah you don't want to spread saliva everywhere especially with a
homeless man unfortunately hey kevin kevin hart has a skit about what happens when you
let this what what let something from a bum touch your lip dude you ever heard about the
bum bump the bum bump no yeah nope no i would yeah you gotta check that skit out like not
right now but it's fucking ridiculous dude he talks about how like this fucking guy like
comes up he's all yeah man can i get a dollar he's like no you can't get a dollar and the
dude's like what fuck you man and fucking flips his lip oh because they got oh because obviously
like not to be mean but like they don't have the resources like everybody else does you
know what i mean to like be able to wash their hands and stuff you know at every opportunity
that they can so they got dirty hands yeah bumpy little bump it'll cause a bump yeah there's
lots of things no bump it or bob that might as well have happened with that guy don't
don't lie on the air rob i don't know you know in the streets they be calling you bumpy
bob no yeah look at bob over there bumping he made that up did he though yeah we've been
through this every episode something new isn't there is something there is something you
do bump so it's fucking gumgee yapper dude he's like okay tip at the top hat
can we turn his volume like the other spectrum why does he always got to be a spectrum what's
wrong with you i don't know what side of that are you on rob i think i know but what do
you mean by that come on dude i'm not gonna lie i probably i'm on the spectrum for sure
i seriously think i have some sort of real talk yeah i actually got called out at work
for it the other day i thought i thought i was clowning on this guy at my work and something
actually because he was just being goofy like he wasn't doing it for real but he had a paper
clip with like one thing turned out and he was like twirling it and i was like hey man
uh can i have you uh do me a favor and he's like he's like hold on 30 okay what's up and
i was like i was like you got a little touch bud and he's like he like knew exactly what
you were talking about that's all i did and then i asked him what i needed and then i
was leaving and there's a guy at my work also um that's in leadership that has the same
first name as me but we call out last names but every time i hear his name it's all hey
steve and i'm like i just stop what i'm doing and i'm like like you're a robot and like
yeah like locked in dude and i was i was talking to this dude and i'm like all right man thanks
i'll see you and it's all hey steve and i stopped and he's like you sure you ain't got
a little touch in you he does i think we all do for sure speak for yourself though yeah
i got a couple tisms some a little more than others yeah but that's all right you know
yeah but i would say i'm like so there there's like high functioning you know what i mean
i think i'm high functioning i'm high performing bob you're not i'm a i'm a high performance
kind of guy i feel like i got a case of the mencha too forget everything else is something
dude i saw that penicillin in your cabinet
that's uncalled for a little bit of that penicillin in there no dude no that part's not uncalled
for the thing that was uncalled for is the zoo admittance ticket that i saw right next
to it you've been fucking koala bears again haven't you dude i literally told you yep
does that does that sound does that sound like i would do something like that well the
weird thing is too like does it does it sound like i'm that kind of guy maybe one of these
days pop yours in this water cup did he just how would it happen in here no it was it was
right next to it i was like are you sure take a drink and try it no there's two there there
was only one nope take a drink and try it got two bags there all right this is the weird
thing though like all week rob's been calling chlamydia lydia so i thought he was like
talking about someone he's like dude fucking lydia's crazy i didn't even say that i have
known one lydia in my life and she was fucking crazy really oh bro this was like middle school
and she was fucking off the chart story time off the charts let's hear it she was also
like one of the like the students that like served lunch in the lunch line like she was
just stuck on rocket by baby almost but she would get pissed when you would ask her if
you asked her for something specific she would get like live it heated like she's in charge
of giving you the food she wants to give you it's like that's not how fucking lunch works
bitch was she at lunch lady give me the fucking cheeseburger she was in my class she just
was like a student helper during lunch do you ever see those people walk down the halls
where hold up is this going to be hurtful or nice a bit above all right yeah let it
rip bud everything in life's got a little touch yeah let it rip well everything in life
has got a little touch but not in everything not everything in life needs a little touch
banger then they should write that into the right they need to write that into the bylaws
of the priesthood hey yo all right he's coming from wig tops all right what were you saying
Steve what were you saying you sick fuck did you can't really grab the Pope's wig top because
all of them have that little bald spot where they put their hat bald spots are okay that's
a touchy one no one I think we already need to show we need to show the world I'm not
it's not even bald it's just sitting hello thinning like Homer yeah we get it we get
it we get it we get it we get it we get it hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on so
you know those people that walk down the hall in school and they they have a trench coat
no but it looks like they're wearing a fucking makeshift straight jacket because they're
always like hugging themselves or like because they're cold no they're edgy maybe walking
like this dude it's like the reverse Naruto run it's cuz they're edgy dude a reverse Naruto
run speaking of run member temple run yep yeah throwback did you actually play that
game are you lying no I just remember it you've been a favor again I don't really I played
it temple run was the shit what's another one flappy bird fruit and really get into
that I didn't get into fruit and a flappy bird was crazy we're about fucking fruit ninja
dude you ever seen say that you ever seen someone play just said that you ever seen
some dude you ever seen someone you ever seen someone play VR fruit ninja no motherfucker
looks like he was kung fu yeah dude fruit ninja was so fun that fucking air horn for
sure it was gas rap horn gong gong boy hey hey what's it like what's it like on the dark
side what's it like being a quitter dude honestly cuz I maybe want to try it again cuz I the
one I tried last night stung my gums like a motherfucker spicy you want to be a roguie
bear dude it felt like LaCroix in my upper lip dude the dude it was Jay wants a man's
pouch this is not sin those are they fucking carbonated that shit hurt last night for some
reason it's cuz you got a soft mouth I will say I do like the winter green Steve
looked his lips at me when he said that was weird get that out of here not on camera Zen's
gonna see this and get mad not sponsor us well they should have got on the train I mean
they too late but not sponsoring us anyways no they will oh fuck dude that shit burns
yeah doesn't it feel like TV static in your lip it's like smelling salts in my lip yeah
like smelly salts yeah dude we should do smelling salts on here one time really seriously motherfucker
hey sound guy bitch hey go to the store and get daddy some smelling salts now we need
it how much does that shit cost you guys actually know how much do smelling salts cost I'm like
she's on a borderline in pain yeah no pain no gain that's what I always say tears no
fears baby tears for fears once it mellows out though it's pretty tasty it is how they're
like moist pre moist did I don't yeah that word pretty wet wait why don't you like the
word moist it's just you would you like it if I whispered it to you it's a bit of an
egg do you know what I don't like to you cluster you guys don't make you cringe hey hold up
what's a phobia do you guys know what trifa phobia is trifa phobia yeah try phobia you
try phobia try phobia yeah whatever the fuck it is I don't know about tripe English though
I'm afraid of tripe it's like clusters of holes oh I freaked me out I do know what that
is the feeling is like it's not like I feel like a phobia is you're scared of something
right but it just straight up makes me uncomfortable yeah it makes me want to cry to mommy dude
straight up yeah is it like a cluster more than to the offensio what about looking relax
he's being crazy over here down boy down hey no it's fucking freaks me out it really does
it I look at something and it makes me want to like throw up but I don't feel nauseous
if that makes sense hmm yeah okay dude you know what the last of phobia is the last of
as a phobia is it scared of being flaccid I was gonna say it sounds like th the last
of phobia it's like scared of like deep water and it sounds like peen related how it does
how in any way does that sound like phobia how does that sound pained how pain okay put
a peen in that write that down no hey the last of phobia how and how on God's green
earth does that sound like a peen anything related to a peen you said you just said you
enunciated the th I thought you were doing don't unbend your can or ph so full as a phobia
which thought bad dude 18 bucks prime it some smelly salts all right we're doing it yep
we're gonna do it soon it's only 18 how many are how many are in it how many are in it
you fucking open it and smell it yeah you take oh yeah you like I'm like I'm like you
just my guys he's so bad like eating dude you have to have that shit claps your face
dude dude did you see that fucking one dude where Joey Diaz does a double hit oh yeah
I did was that on he said he said he missed his other nostril dude he dub he fucking went
did you see the one of Baker Mayfield doing it no bro right before a game he kept going
yeah I did see that bro he's crazy yeah he's a dog I kind of want to party with that guy
Baker's a dog yeah yeah I want to party with him dude same that would be fun he's got to
keep that stupid fucking headband at home though that's not he's famous and do you can
do whatever you want when you're famous no it's true unfortunately that's the truth you
know it dude that this is the one thing that I don't like about the idea of hanging out
with the famous person I would actually probably be a dick not not like to them overall but
I would like hey bro what's up man good to meet you right yeah and then oh yeah yeah
dude you ready to go out bro it's gonna be fucking lit dog on Baker Mayfield I'll be
like cool dude don't wear any fucking goofy shit bro I know how you rich people do it
dude you look like fucking weirdos some of you out here dressing like a bird Therians
like a fucking fucking Therian are you doing doing your hair dude Halsey used to be hot
bro Halsey Halsey used to be hot Halsey whatever the fuck her name is dude Halsey yeah oh Halsey
I'm Steve is Halsey a Therian no it's not even that dude like freaky Therian shit she
used to look like a normal person oh Halsey and then she started dressing like a damn
reptilian should be in a hussy yeah honestly that Therian is a bird what's a reptilian
it's a lizard person hey don't get no real how much don't get started on this shit dude
we'll be here for another hour legit I want to know dude Google it there Alex Jones he
knows all about it this is what this is what lizard people can do you can play a famous
singer or you can play Napoleon Dynamite all at the same time oh oh yeah like Taylor Swift
Napoleon blown apart you put it yep no bite your tongue boy don't do it yeah I don't even
know what you're about to say but you gave me a look yeah you know you're doing a look
on your eyes right now says don't yeah I don't like your face right now I was about to say
one of these right now I was about to say something fucking crazy dude but I'll say
it a little less tempered say it I think I touched the the fucking rogue bear pouch and
then touched my eye because it's real real bad dude have you ever chopped up jalapenos
thought you wash your hands good enough and then touched your peen no one time Jay put
icy hot on his balls dude yeah bro really yeah he did really yeah if we're gonna air out
my shit we're not yours you need to air yours out too it was because everybody it was after
football practice and everybody was being a little bitch because I was trying to get
everybody else to do it and nobody would do it and I was like fuck you pussies and I did
it and it I regretted it yeah it was just running around and then soaked my nuts in
the sink are you okay now yeah I mean I don't know I'm probably sterile but yeah you put
you put the freaking sorry Nicole you put the mint grease on your hush puppies dude
mint grease dude not a good idea don't recommend not in 10 out of 10 don't don't recommend
that 10 out of 10 recommend it if you want to hurt yeah if you want to cry a little bit
shed a couple tears tears for fears baby that's what I always say so you were trying to get
all the dudes in there to do it I was just trying to get this one dude you said oh you
said everyone was being a bunch of pussies everybody was because I mean I asked a couple
people but there was one dude trying to sell it I always fucked with and oh that's weird
that's kind of like me yep but I but you asked for it Rob no yeah you deserve it I literally
sit here and then it happens nine times out of ten this dude would do whatever I said
like if it was always off the charts crazy but I would fuck with him high school fucking
with somebody is worse than like yeah it'll make someone cry oh I feel bad for some of
the shit that I did to people in high school what if I was in high school with you oh your
life you're a man you'd be toast would you turn me into an active shooter sorry okay
meet that yeah I'm do it meet this fucking guy muted that that was rough Bob sit there
for a minute yep you're gonna go to timeout for now yep put your nose in the corner and
think about what you did yep smell that crease I'm sorry yeah apologize to the fuck I have
to put out a lot of apology videos for this fucking shit dude can I ask you guys a question
yeah have you guys ever thought about who Jeffrey Epstein sex traffic people to what
no I actually no seriously like I think my name is yeah I think the guys a piece of shit
in a weirdo yes yeah but there is okay here's the thing here's the thing where how did we
get on that topic yeah I don't know 80D bro severe I have like yeah 18,000 fucking little
personal rails going on in here dude you little fucking rat you what you call Bob earlier
vermin yeah fucking vermin you to road it was yeah sometimes bro you're not good at
this I heard sometimes Rob's a fucking guinea pig yep and sometimes he's a fucking mouse
I've been called Dory mouse all a mouse is is a fucking baby rat a little baby one it's
not even no it's not right baby rat yeah nope it's not no it's not it's like Gotti said
you like your daddy there's a doll was a rat there's baby mice and adult that means there's
baby rats and adult rats Gotti said it bro master splinter how do you said it master
splinter I thought we decided that master splinter was actually a bear cat he is a bear
cat look it up okay Google it sound guy Google it hey get off tinder you fucker dude he's
a real piece of work I don't get paid enough for this shit either dude you know what I
bet you that sound guy so fucking broke dude he just DMS people he doesn't pay me that
four hundred ninety nine a month package now oh I get it now yeah so stupid ah speed up
idiot speed up all right guys well hold up wait hold on slow down grab the wall we're
gonna like it trying to make your ass fall off sorry shout out Sage gas pedal gas pedal
all right you're done all right well guys you're out bud that we're gonna leave it here
yeah we're gonna leave it here we're gonna let you guys soak on it yep enjoy the soap
okay take a listen soak it in yeah goodbye bye guys bye