Welcome to Milestone Moments, the show where
we explore the journeys that lead to success.
I'm Sheila Slick, your host and founder of Five
Milestones. In every episode, we will bring you
insights from the minds of entrepreneurs, leaders
and experts who will share not just their expertise,
but the milestone moments that have reshaped
their journeys and led to significant achievements.
So if you're looking for motivation, you're in
the right place. Subscribe now and discover the
milestones that mark the path to success. Welcome
to another episode of Milestone Moments in Business
and Leadership. I'm Sheila Slick, your host.
And today, my special guest is the one and only
Nancy Zare, Ph .D., also known as the sales whisperer.
She is the creator of the Likeability Sales System.
She's renowned for her focus on buyers, where
she shows professional business owners how to
generate warm, organic leads on LinkedIn and
turn them into clients. She earned her master's
and doctorate from Boston College, and Nancy
has authored seven books, including an Amazon
International bestseller. Nancy resides in Florida
and is currently a student of spirituality. She
also volunteers for the Farm Dog Rescue and the
Immerman Angels. Welcome to the show, Nancy.
Sheila, I cannot wait to dive in and work and
tell people about milestone moments in business.
And leadership, because you're both. That's true.
That's true. And what I love about you, other
than your personality, you're definitely a likability.
I give you a hundred, even though we haven't
gotten into the term, but you have a signature
style. Oh, thank you. It's true. For those who
might just be listening, it's because I always
wear a hat. Entrepreneurs wear many hats. Leaders
wear many hats. But the one they often dislike
the most is that marketing and sales piece. And
as a leader, it's that communicating, especially
with someone who is challenging. I'm not challenging
Nancy. I'm kidding. No, I know. You and I are
buddies. We don't need to challenge each other
for sure. All right, so let's talk about how
you went from earning a master's and doctorate
at Boston College to becoming the sales whisperer,
helping business owners master their organic
lead generation on LinkedIn. What was that pivotal
moment in your journey that sparked this transition?
Sheila, it started when I received... financial
funding from the government to pay for my graduate
studies. And they wanted me to implement mental
health services, addiction programs in the workplace.
It was an excellent match for somebody studying
psychology. And also I came with a very strong
addiction background I had already published
in the field. So this was a great match. It wasn't
until I graduated that I discovered But in order
to implement these programs required selling,
marketing and selling. And I was ill -equipped
for doing this. Now, if you're like me, I had
this foggy notion about salespeople as being
aggressive, pushy, manipulative. In other words,
I didn't want to be a salesperson in the usual
sense. And so I went back to school, not to...
get a degree to the library in order to read
up on the Masters of Sales. And what I discovered,
Sheila, is that my knowledge of human behavior,
personality styles, was complemented beautifully
by something called the Platinum Rule. Now, do
you know the Golden Rule? I don't know the Golden
or the Platinum Rule, so let's talk about that.
The golden rule, of course, is from, you know,
Christian, Judeo -Christian tradition, which
is treat others the way I want to be treated.
It's a very humane way to begin. The platinum
rule twists it just a little bit. Treat others
the way they want to be treated. It's a subtle
shift, but it was miraculous because within 90
days, I had quadrupled sales. Just by implementing
that focus, not on me as a seller, but on you
as the buyer. And by understanding how buyers
buy and speaking their language, we formed a
very authentic connection. The relationship then
went on to do business together. So that was
a pivotal moment for me to find that I received
funding from the government, didn't know how
to sell. and found myself having to learn how
to sell. And so then what happened with all those
studies, and did you move forward with the grant,
or you just switched careers, so to speak? The
funding was for me to complete my degrees, which
I did. I got my degree, and then I was hired
by Mount Auburn Hospital in Cambridge, Mass.
They had an external program. that they were
offering to the businesses in the greater Boston
community, and that is to have occupational health
and employee assistance services. And I headed
up employee assistance, and that's when I found
myself in the position to market and sell without
knowing how to do so in what I considered a values,
ethical value way that was aligned with who I
am. Again. Many of us, especially those of you
who perhaps have gotten an advanced degree or
a license or certification, you have an expertise
in that occupational area and you love what you
do. I certainly loved what I did. But nobody
taught you how to market and sell your services.
Even though many of us, I think 90 % of my classmates,
went on to be independent consultants, nobody
taught us how to do it. And hence, I was a fish
out of water. Your sales system is called a likability
sales system. And like you mentioned, you flip
the script by focusing on the buyer rather than
on the seller. So how do you blend that deep
understanding of human behavior that you got?
in a practical strategy that can help business
owners to connect and to convert authentically.
So notice the system is called a likability,
not likeability. Likeability is, you know, being
popular. A likability is a word I coined. And
so if I may, I'm going to define what that word
means. It's a feeling of thought, a perception
within your prospect, within the other person,
that, wow, what you're saying tells me you get
me. We're alike. Feeling alike, feeling like
we're of the same type is amazing because it
actually speaks to the unconscious part of the
brain, what you might call the critter brain
or the reptilian brain. that unconsciously is
driving the bus. We don't even know that it's
the bus driver, but it will not admit passengers
onto the bus unless it believes that that passenger
is friendly and like me. And so that part of
our brain, when we are meeting someone new, is
instantaneously, without our conscious knowledge,
making a decision whether we are friend or foe.
And so when it admits us on the bus as a friend,
now we have the opportunity to develop a relationship.
Otherwise, Sheila, we're sunk. We don't even
get it past the bus door. We can't even mount
the steps to take a ride. What I really like,
too, about your approach is that you begin with
like a quiz where we had to answer questions.
And then there's different types of personalities
or personas. How does that work? Yes. So the
likability system, there are five steps to it.
Step number one is to identify four different
buying styles, personality styles. I call them
buyers because, of course, I'm focused on helping
people sell. But they are personalities. And
everybody is a combination of all four. However,
30 % of the population, one of those styles is
so dominant that that is how they respond to
everything, socially and professionally, that's
their style. But do the math. 70 % of the population,
7 -0. 70 % of the population go between two or
more styles. Hence, they start off socially in
one style. But when you ask them a decision to
be made from the business point of view, they
may be making it from a totally different style.
This is what I help my clients learn and discover.
so that they can employ it to their best interest.
And what I mean by that is when you know your
prospect's style, now you can speak the language
of your prospect. It's like switching from English
to French or Chinese or whatever it might be
in order to help my... prospect understand me
better. And when I switch into their language,
that's when the likability happens. And they
say to themselves, oh, you get me. We're alike.
And then that also gives confidence, right? Because
it makes you feel like you've been trained, like
you know what you're doing, which takes you back
to that very original part. Consultants end up
with a lot of experience in their field. but
not necessarily in how to market and sell themselves.
I'm so glad you recognize that element of confidence
because confidence sells. Years ago, Sheila,
like many people, I was approached by a multi
-level company, a representative. They had a
product I really wanted. And I not only decided
to buy the product, but I bought in at the distributor
level. And so many of us have found ourselves
in that situation where we were enticed thinking,
oh, you know, this is so easy. I love the product.
Everybody's going to buy the product and I'm
going to have this downline, etc. Well, I share
this because, first of all, I had only moderate
success in my venture in multi -level marketing.
And by the way, those products are excellent.
And these companies are really quality companies.
What I learned, though. which I didn't quite
learn entirely, was that the people who were
successful had posture. In fact, they actually
used that word posture. Now, I knew it wasn't
standing tall with the book balanced on your
head, and yet I didn't exactly know how you get
posture. And it turns out, Sheila, that posture...
And confidence are very much the same. When you
feel good about yourself, in fact, you even just
immediately took a breath, your shoulders went
back, you stood taller. That's what confidence
does for you. It does change your posture and
it communicates vibrationally on an energetic
way to the other people who are your audience
that this is a woman or man who's got an answer
that they believe in. You see, confidence is
really a transmission of energy. And in this
case, that's what sales is all about. I'm exchanging
my service or my product for your energy, which
in this case might be monetary, or maybe we do
in kind or whatever. But there's an exchange
of energy going on. And when my confidence, when
I'm exuding good energy, you want it. You want
to have a bit of it for yourself. So as a seven
-time author, including being that international
Amazon bestseller, and a volunteer for causes
like the Farm Dog Rescue, you've clearly mastered
balancing purpose and impact. So how do you stay
focused in your own work, especially when you're
helping others? It's called lifelong learning
and always have a beginner's mind. You see, when
I think I know, that's probably the kiss of death.
And yet, obviously, I have gained some wisdom.
I'm certainly, you know, lived on this planet
now so many decades. I have wisdom. And yet,
I have to keep that beginner's mind and approach
each new situation. In fact, even the same person.
Our conversation is fresh and new and vibrant.
And I will tell you, Sheila, I've been a podcast
guest on many programs, but the questions you've
asked and the information I've shared today,
it's unique. It's not what, you know, and those
of you who are in the listening audience, if
you care to, you can go listen to other podcasts
where I've been a guest. You will not find this
information on them. And some of that is because
of the questions you asked. And some of that
is because. I've brought a different energy because
I keep evolving. And so you're asking, how does
that happen? Well, it happens by continually
exposing myself to new ideas, meeting new people,
reading new books, listening to podcasts and
other material. In other words, it's a constant,
I take in, I take in, I take in, because I can't
give out what I don't have. And so I have to
fill myself. In order to give to others. And
I love giving to others. I believe that's my
purpose on earth is to serve. But in order to
serve, I have to be full. Otherwise, I'm giving
you the dregs and I don't want to do that. Well,
thank you. I do take a lot of time researching
the person and what they do so that my questions
align with what I want to do with the podcast.
And then. What makes you unique so that we can
bring out some of those parts in the conversation?
So thank you, Nancy. Now, I want to know what's
your next milestone? So there are many milestones,
you know, personally as well as professionally.
Something near and dear to my heart, though,
is to be a philanthropist. But to be a philanthropist
means to accumulate enough funds to make. a significant
difference. And so that would be my next milestone.
I would love to create a healing center. I believe
that our minds are powerful tools and that the
mind can heal the body. You know, Christian science,
no, I'm not one, but I understand their philosophy.
A Course in Miracles, I'm a student of A Course
in Miracles, very much it's about how this materialistic
world is illusionary, etc. Well, there are many
kinds of spiritual practices that have come into
me. I would love to share them more with others.
And so my next milestone would be to create some
sort of institution, although that word right
away strikes terror to me because it feels too
restrictive, but there must be some way for me
to share more. with people. I certainly take
very seriously my role as a role model. I truly
believe that I need to live it and walk it and
not just talk it. Well, thank you for sharing
it and out loud because you know what they say,
when you vocalize it, you're, you know, making
that vision one step closer. I agree with you.
I'm excited you shared it. Well, thank you so
much for joining me today, Nancy. I couldn't
be more thrilled. And I hope, listeners, that
you got some value of it. If nothing else, I
hope that you're inspired to think about your
own milestones. We've all had them in our lives.
I've had many. And I suspect there are more to
come. And as I always say, to your sales success.
I will leave Nancy's information on the description
in the notes so you can visit her website, perhaps
even take the... quiz if you are a coach or a
consultant the quiz is called who is your ideal
client and we really didn't talk a lot about
that but i want you to think for a moment that
until you know who it is that is your dream client
who you truly want to serve you're going to be
floundering but once you dial in who that person
is and you know with certainty what their personality
style is, now you can speak their language and
now you're able to build rapport and create a
likability. And the website, if you want to spell
it out? It's nancyzare .com. So as long as you
spell my last name correctly, you'll get there.
Nancy, N -A -N -C -Y, Z for zestful, A -R -E
.com. Thank you. And thank you all for joining
us on another episode of Milestone Moments in
Business and Leadership. Until next time.