WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:02.620 This episode is sponsored by Transcend, a veteran 00:00:02.620 --> 00:00:04.960 -owned and operated performance optimization 00:00:04.960 --> 00:00:08.039 company that I introduced recently as a sponsor 00:00:08.039 --> 00:00:10.820 on this show. Well, since then I have actually 00:00:10.820 --> 00:00:13.080 been using my products and I have had incredible 00:00:13.080 --> 00:00:15.939 success. There was initial blood work that was 00:00:15.939 --> 00:00:19.039 extremely detailed and based on that they offered 00:00:19.039 --> 00:00:23.519 supplementation. So I began taking DHEA. BPC 00:00:23.519 --> 00:00:26.399 -157 for inflammation based on the fact that 00:00:26.399 --> 00:00:28.300 I've been a stuntman, a martial artist and a 00:00:28.300 --> 00:00:30.579 firefighter my whole life. Lots of aches and 00:00:30.579 --> 00:00:33.880 pains. Dihexa to help cognition after multiple 00:00:33.880 --> 00:00:36.899 punches to the head and shift work and peptides. 00:00:37.079 --> 00:00:39.520 Four months later they did a detailed blood work 00:00:39.520 --> 00:00:42.259 again and I was actually able to taper off two 00:00:42.259 --> 00:00:44.479 of the peptides because my body had responded 00:00:44.479 --> 00:00:47.079 so well to just one of them that it was optimized 00:00:47.079 --> 00:00:50.530 at that point. So I cannot speak highly enough 00:00:50.530 --> 00:00:53.530 of the immense range of supplementation that 00:00:53.530 --> 00:00:55.789 they offer, whether it's male health, female 00:00:55.789 --> 00:00:58.530 health, peptides to boost your own testosterone, 00:00:58.630 --> 00:01:00.829 which I would argue is needed by a lot of the 00:01:00.829 --> 00:01:03.570 fire service, or whether it's exogenous testosterone 00:01:03.570 --> 00:01:06.750 needed, especially after TBIs or advanced age. 00:01:07.239 --> 00:01:09.480 Now, as I mentioned before, the other side of 00:01:09.480 --> 00:01:11.980 this company is an altruistic arm called the 00:01:11.980 --> 00:01:14.840 Transcend Foundation, which is putting veterans 00:01:14.840 --> 00:01:17.640 and first responders through some of their protocols 00:01:17.640 --> 00:01:21.359 free of charge. Now, Transcend are also offering 00:01:21.359 --> 00:01:24.019 you, the audience, 10 % off their protocols. 00:01:24.260 --> 00:01:27.120 And you can find that on jamesgearing .com under 00:01:27.120 --> 00:01:29.840 the Products tab. And if you want to hear more 00:01:29.840 --> 00:01:32.560 about Transcend and their story, listen to episode 00:01:32.560 --> 00:01:37.390 808 with the founder, Ernie Colling. or go to 00:01:37.390 --> 00:01:41.950 transcendcompany .com. Welcome to the Behind 00:01:41.950 --> 00:01:43.890 the Shield podcast. As always, my name is James 00:01:43.890 --> 00:01:45.829 Gearing, and this week it is my absolute honor 00:01:45.829 --> 00:01:49.870 to welcome on the show researcher -turned -firefighter 00:01:49.870 --> 00:01:53.510 Jenny Gremer. Now, in this conversation, we discuss 00:01:53.510 --> 00:01:56.870 a host of topics, from her journey through education, 00:01:57.609 --> 00:02:01.209 Alzheimer's research, her path into the fire 00:02:01.209 --> 00:02:05.750 service, working with on -scene associates, mental 00:02:05.750 --> 00:02:10.909 health toxic culture surfing and so much more 00:02:10.909 --> 00:02:13.650 now before we get to this incredible conversation 00:02:13.650 --> 00:02:16.590 as i say every week please just take a moment 00:02:16.590 --> 00:02:20.069 go to whichever app you listen to this on subscribe 00:02:20.069 --> 00:02:23.710 to the show leave feedback and leave a rating 00:02:24.699 --> 00:02:27.719 Every single five -star rating truly does elevate 00:02:27.719 --> 00:02:30.400 this podcast, therefore making it easier for 00:02:30.400 --> 00:02:34.099 others to find. And this is a free library of 00:02:34.099 --> 00:02:39.060 well over 1 ,100 episodes now. So all I ask in 00:02:39.060 --> 00:02:42.180 return is that you help share these incredible 00:02:42.180 --> 00:02:45.060 men and women's stories so I can get them to 00:02:45.060 --> 00:02:48.099 every single person on planet Earth who needs 00:02:48.099 --> 00:02:51.979 to hear them. So with that being said, I introduce 00:02:51.979 --> 00:03:16.139 to you Jenny... grima enjoy well jenny i want 00:03:16.139 --> 00:03:19.460 to start by saying two things firstly thank you 00:03:19.460 --> 00:03:21.099 to aaron heller because i think that was the 00:03:21.099 --> 00:03:23.930 one that specifically put us together, even though 00:03:23.930 --> 00:03:25.789 I think we'd actually, you know, interacted on 00:03:25.789 --> 00:03:28.710 social media before. And secondly, I think we 00:03:28.710 --> 00:03:31.949 were both were a part of Walt Lewis's training 00:03:31.949 --> 00:03:33.750 a few years ago in the Orlando Fire Conference. 00:03:33.870 --> 00:03:36.229 So thank you to him as well. And then most importantly, 00:03:36.270 --> 00:03:38.050 I want to welcome you to the Behind the Shield 00:03:38.050 --> 00:03:41.069 podcast today. Thank you. I'm excited to be here. 00:03:42.270 --> 00:03:44.449 So where on planet Earth are we finding you this 00:03:44.449 --> 00:03:47.270 afternoon? So I live in Fort Pierce, Florida, 00:03:47.409 --> 00:03:50.069 which is for those who are not from Florida. 00:03:50.680 --> 00:03:53.039 or don't know the area, it's south of Orlando, 00:03:53.319 --> 00:03:56.460 north of Palm Beach on the east coast. How is 00:03:56.460 --> 00:03:59.020 Fort Pierce? Because my wife spent the last four 00:03:59.020 --> 00:04:02.199 years in med school down in Davie, so Broward 00:04:02.199 --> 00:04:05.000 County. And one of the plans that we had was 00:04:05.000 --> 00:04:07.240 to move to Fort Pierce, which was kind of like 00:04:07.240 --> 00:04:10.479 a halfway point. So I'd still be up in the Ocala 00:04:10.479 --> 00:04:12.039 area when I needed to be, and then she could 00:04:12.039 --> 00:04:14.360 go down south. But we ended up just saying that 00:04:14.360 --> 00:04:17.180 300 miles was a better idea as a commute. So 00:04:17.180 --> 00:04:20.439 talk to me about Fort Pierce. I absolutely love 00:04:20.439 --> 00:04:22.800 Fort Pierce. I moved here in 2009 from South 00:04:22.800 --> 00:04:29.800 Florida, and it is where I set up my life. It's 00:04:29.800 --> 00:04:32.439 by the beach. I live very close to the beach. 00:04:32.459 --> 00:04:34.160 I can walk across the street to the beach. It 00:04:34.160 --> 00:04:37.420 was my dream to make that happen. I surf, so 00:04:37.420 --> 00:04:45.100 it makes it really nice. But it's a growing and 00:04:45.100 --> 00:04:48.500 developing city. The county is St. Lucie County, 00:04:48.620 --> 00:04:51.019 which encompasses Port St. Lucie. And between 00:04:51.019 --> 00:04:53.959 Port Pierce and Port St. Lucie, it is booming 00:04:53.959 --> 00:04:57.220 right now. So everyone's starting to move here. 00:04:57.300 --> 00:04:59.899 But I absolutely love Port Pierce. It was a nice 00:04:59.899 --> 00:05:02.540 little kind of a small town feel compared to 00:05:02.540 --> 00:05:05.259 growing up in South Florida. And it's surrounded 00:05:05.259 --> 00:05:08.240 by water, which I love. We have the Indian River 00:05:08.240 --> 00:05:14.740 Lagoon, the ocean. You get a little bit of country 00:05:14.740 --> 00:05:17.910 out west. Well, you get the beach going east. 00:05:18.009 --> 00:05:20.829 We have a nice little cute little downtown. It's 00:05:20.829 --> 00:05:22.589 small enough where you can still know a lot of 00:05:22.589 --> 00:05:24.290 people in town, although so many people are moving 00:05:24.290 --> 00:05:27.569 in. It's definitely getting to be where you don't 00:05:27.569 --> 00:05:29.750 know every local when you go to the restaurants 00:05:29.750 --> 00:05:34.050 anymore. So but I love it. That's what's interesting. 00:05:34.350 --> 00:05:36.730 I have the same here in Ocala. Beautiful, beautiful 00:05:36.730 --> 00:05:38.709 place. But obviously, a lot of people are moving 00:05:38.709 --> 00:05:41.449 here from all over the country as well, which 00:05:41.449 --> 00:05:44.209 is which is great. apart from the fact that I'm 00:05:44.209 --> 00:05:46.850 seeing all these apartment complexes and hotels 00:05:46.850 --> 00:05:50.089 and all these other things being built, but the, 00:05:50.209 --> 00:05:52.649 for example, local county fire department is 00:05:52.649 --> 00:05:54.389 saying they still don't have any money to hire 00:05:54.389 --> 00:05:58.069 extra people. So as a Florida resident that sees 00:05:58.069 --> 00:06:01.209 construction everywhere, east, north, south, 00:06:01.430 --> 00:06:04.250 east, west, north, I question that whole thing 00:06:04.250 --> 00:06:05.970 where we're still told there's not the budget 00:06:05.970 --> 00:06:08.529 when in our state specifically, it is blowing 00:06:08.529 --> 00:06:12.339 up with construction. It is. It's definitely 00:06:12.339 --> 00:06:15.740 something that I think a lot of fire departments 00:06:15.740 --> 00:06:17.980 are going to be having a hard time keeping up 00:06:17.980 --> 00:06:21.240 with as far as hiring and building firehouses 00:06:21.240 --> 00:06:24.759 just because it's accelerated so quickly. So 00:06:24.759 --> 00:06:27.360 we're turning it. Our small town is turning into 00:06:27.360 --> 00:06:30.720 a larger city very quickly, I think. So, yeah, 00:06:30.879 --> 00:06:33.079 I definitely think a lot of fire departments 00:06:33.079 --> 00:06:38.160 are going to have to keep up. Absolutely. Well, 00:06:38.240 --> 00:06:39.759 you mentioned South Florida. So start at the 00:06:39.759 --> 00:06:41.879 very beginning of your timeline. Tell me where 00:06:41.879 --> 00:06:43.579 you were born and tell me a little bit about 00:06:43.579 --> 00:06:45.819 your family dynamic, what your parents did, how 00:06:45.819 --> 00:06:48.980 many siblings. Okay. So I was actually born in 00:06:48.980 --> 00:06:54.360 Hammersmith in London. Oh, really? Yes. And I 00:06:54.360 --> 00:06:59.399 moved to the States when I was four with my parents. 00:06:59.560 --> 00:07:02.199 We moved to Miami. I have an older brother. He's 00:07:02.199 --> 00:07:06.040 about a year and a half older than me. And so 00:07:06.040 --> 00:07:08.459 my parents got a divorce when I was younger and 00:07:08.459 --> 00:07:14.000 I was raised by a single mom. So we lived in 00:07:14.000 --> 00:07:17.819 Miami Lakes area for a long time until about 00:07:17.819 --> 00:07:21.279 until I was about ninth grade and then moved 00:07:21.279 --> 00:07:24.259 to a different part of South Florida. Eventually 00:07:24.259 --> 00:07:25.959 moved to Boca. I went to three different high 00:07:25.959 --> 00:07:28.720 schools, ended up finishing high school in Boca 00:07:28.720 --> 00:07:35.019 Raton in Palm Beach County. And then. And went 00:07:35.019 --> 00:07:40.120 to FAU there. So I did my undergrad at FAU. I 00:07:40.120 --> 00:07:43.600 got a job offer in 2009 after I got my degree 00:07:43.600 --> 00:07:47.000 doing research up here in Fort Pierce, which 00:07:47.000 --> 00:07:50.819 is why I moved up here. And I finished my master's 00:07:50.819 --> 00:07:54.939 degree through FAU. And that's how I ended up 00:07:54.939 --> 00:07:57.930 in Fort Pierce in 2009. Well, let's go back to 00:07:57.930 --> 00:08:01.889 Hammersmith. This is how these interviews go. 00:08:02.870 --> 00:08:07.029 Was either parent British? My dad is British 00:08:07.029 --> 00:08:10.550 and my grandma, his mom as well. Okay. And was 00:08:10.550 --> 00:08:13.850 this one of the family dynamics where once the 00:08:13.850 --> 00:08:16.670 parent left, you weren't able to see them again 00:08:16.670 --> 00:08:22.470 or were you able to still stay in touch? My father 00:08:22.470 --> 00:08:24.829 and I have stayed in touch here and there, but 00:08:24.829 --> 00:08:29.899 we... no we don't really communicate any longer 00:08:29.899 --> 00:08:32.159 so okay well the reason i asked that i'm not 00:08:32.159 --> 00:08:33.940 trying to pry too much it's just it's amazing 00:08:33.940 --> 00:08:36.700 how so many of us in uniform when you look at 00:08:36.700 --> 00:08:40.850 early life there's nearly always struggles And 00:08:40.850 --> 00:08:43.049 that can be a very positive thing. But I think, 00:08:43.049 --> 00:08:45.570 you know, that draws you into uniform a lot of 00:08:45.570 --> 00:08:48.129 times because, you know, for whatever reason, 00:08:48.210 --> 00:08:50.490 whether it's a sense of abandonment, you're not 00:08:50.490 --> 00:08:52.929 feeling good enough. And then you couple in the 00:08:52.929 --> 00:08:54.870 positive things, which are, I want to help people. 00:08:54.909 --> 00:08:56.289 I don't want other people to feel this pain. 00:08:56.769 --> 00:08:59.529 So many of us have these kind of early life stories. 00:08:59.590 --> 00:09:01.669 So that's, you know, what's interesting is more 00:09:01.669 --> 00:09:04.350 often than not, you know, I would say 90 plus 00:09:04.350 --> 00:09:06.730 percent of people, when you start talking about 00:09:06.730 --> 00:09:08.830 early life, there are a lot of these significant 00:09:08.830 --> 00:09:12.240 traumas. um you know perceived traumas at least 00:09:12.240 --> 00:09:15.940 that uh i think more often than not forge a person 00:09:15.940 --> 00:09:18.500 to be the right kind of uh human for a first 00:09:18.500 --> 00:09:22.340 responder profession i i definitely think early 00:09:22.340 --> 00:09:24.820 life affects pretty much everything you do in 00:09:24.820 --> 00:09:28.360 your adult life so i could definitely see the 00:09:28.360 --> 00:09:31.259 relation i i was very fortunate i have a very 00:09:31.259 --> 00:09:38.059 strong mother um who really um She was strict 00:09:38.059 --> 00:09:42.820 and tough when I was younger, for sure. But she 00:09:42.820 --> 00:09:45.740 set quite an example. I mean, there wasn't anything 00:09:45.740 --> 00:09:47.960 that we were ever lacking. She would make it 00:09:47.960 --> 00:09:51.139 happen. And we had, she taught us to work hard 00:09:51.139 --> 00:09:54.779 to go after what we wanted. And, you know, I'm 00:09:54.779 --> 00:09:56.759 very fortunate. I had such a, you know, I have 00:09:56.759 --> 00:10:00.980 such a great mother. So she was a very good role 00:10:00.980 --> 00:10:05.080 model. What's the geographical background of 00:10:05.080 --> 00:10:08.309 your last names is quite interesting. It's actually 00:10:08.309 --> 00:10:13.590 Maltese. So my grandfather, my dad's father, 00:10:13.690 --> 00:10:19.690 my papi, he's from Malta, which is, for a lot 00:10:19.690 --> 00:10:21.990 of people who don't know where that is, it's 00:10:21.990 --> 00:10:25.669 a little island off the boot of Italy. I say 00:10:25.669 --> 00:10:30.870 it's Italian, but Malta was basically invaded 00:10:30.870 --> 00:10:33.169 multiple times. It's got very deep water, so 00:10:33.169 --> 00:10:38.679 very easy to invade with large ships. So it did 00:10:38.679 --> 00:10:40.919 end up getting its own independence eventually. 00:10:41.179 --> 00:10:44.220 But yeah, it's this small island. I think it's 00:10:44.220 --> 00:10:47.820 about 17 miles long. And so my grandfather's 00:10:47.820 --> 00:10:49.919 from there. It's where we get our Maltese cross 00:10:49.919 --> 00:10:53.919 for people who don't know. That's very cool to 00:10:53.919 --> 00:10:57.600 say. That's my bloodline crest that you're using 00:10:57.600 --> 00:11:01.950 in the fire service. Yeah, exactly. I feel like 00:11:01.950 --> 00:11:03.470 there was a lot of things that ended up tying 00:11:03.470 --> 00:11:06.269 me to the fire service later on, you know. Absolutely. 00:11:06.669 --> 00:11:08.450 Well, what about profession? What was your mom 00:11:08.450 --> 00:11:11.809 doing as far as her career? Well, my parents 00:11:11.809 --> 00:11:18.269 were both technically missionaries for a church 00:11:18.269 --> 00:11:22.210 for a while. And then when we moved to the States, 00:11:22.269 --> 00:11:24.830 my mom became a teacher. She taught special needs 00:11:24.830 --> 00:11:31.220 kids. And then now she's been for, I don't even 00:11:31.220 --> 00:11:33.019 know how many years she's been doing it. She's 00:11:33.019 --> 00:11:35.240 what's called a support coordinator, where she 00:11:35.240 --> 00:11:39.779 basically coordinates support for special needs 00:11:39.779 --> 00:11:43.379 kids and adults, making sure they're getting 00:11:43.379 --> 00:11:46.480 proper treatment care, if they can work a job 00:11:46.480 --> 00:11:48.919 to make sure they're, you know, basically all 00:11:48.919 --> 00:11:50.700 their needs are met. So she's been doing that 00:11:50.700 --> 00:11:56.440 for a while now, probably almost 30 years. Have 00:11:56.440 --> 00:11:58.299 you, and this is a, you know, I'm not sure if 00:11:58.299 --> 00:11:59.659 you would have had this conversation, but have 00:11:59.659 --> 00:12:03.139 you had the conversation as far as the metamorphosis 00:12:03.139 --> 00:12:06.620 of the way the special needs community are perceived? 00:12:06.820 --> 00:12:09.840 Because as we stand here now, like I've had Nick 00:12:09.840 --> 00:12:12.879 Nickich on the show, who's a young man with Down 00:12:12.879 --> 00:12:15.539 syndrome who did the Hawaiian triathlon. You 00:12:15.539 --> 00:12:16.980 know, we've got all these adaptive athletes. 00:12:17.059 --> 00:12:19.139 We've got people with cerebral palsy just crushing 00:12:19.139 --> 00:12:22.649 marathons. And, you know, it's so. Beautiful 00:12:22.649 --> 00:12:25.830 to see. And I feel like most people are absolutely, 00:12:25.990 --> 00:12:29.549 you know, behind a lot of that community. Whereas 00:12:29.549 --> 00:12:31.870 if you look at our history, the same kind of 00:12:31.870 --> 00:12:34.230 individuals were institutionalized and kept away 00:12:34.230 --> 00:12:38.629 from society. Right. Well, I mean, just from 00:12:38.629 --> 00:12:41.309 my mom working, I haven't personally spent as 00:12:41.309 --> 00:12:46.570 much time with a lot of her patients, but she's 00:12:46.570 --> 00:12:48.990 got some very incredible people who she goes 00:12:48.990 --> 00:12:53.480 to see and that she works with. Um, and yeah, 00:12:53.620 --> 00:12:56.320 I, I guess, uh, the mindset has shifted a lot 00:12:56.320 --> 00:13:01.259 on just, I think everything between, you know, 00:13:01.299 --> 00:13:04.139 um, special needs, mental health, everything 00:13:04.139 --> 00:13:07.200 has kind of been shifted to understand, uh, a 00:13:07.200 --> 00:13:09.899 different perspective versus just institutionalizing 00:13:09.899 --> 00:13:14.879 people. So, um, you know, a lot of things can 00:13:14.879 --> 00:13:16.960 be explained chemically, like with mental health 00:13:16.960 --> 00:13:19.419 and things like that versus, you know, before 00:13:19.419 --> 00:13:22.830 they were just assumed. They weren't well institutionalized 00:13:22.830 --> 00:13:25.549 and give them a lobotomy. So who knows? Yeah, 00:13:26.269 --> 00:13:28.789 there's been a lot of changes, I'd say, for sure. 00:13:29.830 --> 00:13:32.950 What about Miami Lakes? I was a Hialeah firefighter. 00:13:32.990 --> 00:13:34.549 It's my very first department, which I think 00:13:34.549 --> 00:13:36.970 is butted up against you. So talk to me about 00:13:36.970 --> 00:13:39.990 the Miami Lakes area as far as your upbringing, 00:13:40.049 --> 00:13:44.289 excuse me, your upbringing then. So I went to 00:13:44.289 --> 00:13:46.809 Miami Lakes Elementary in Miami Lakes Middle. 00:13:47.850 --> 00:13:51.279 It was a very diverse community. I was more of 00:13:51.279 --> 00:13:59.360 the minority there. And it was great. I played 00:13:59.360 --> 00:14:07.000 softball in one of the local parks there. But, 00:14:07.200 --> 00:14:11.039 you know, I guess it was just, I don't know, 00:14:11.059 --> 00:14:13.919 what I consider a normal upbringing. Hang out 00:14:13.919 --> 00:14:16.200 with the neighborhood kids, play a home run derby. 00:14:17.059 --> 00:14:19.220 you know, get in trouble, my mom would whistle 00:14:19.220 --> 00:14:21.879 whenever it was time to come back home. And you 00:14:21.879 --> 00:14:24.620 can hear it from the whole neighborhood. But, 00:14:24.679 --> 00:14:30.059 you know, Miami Lakes was great. You know, we 00:14:30.059 --> 00:14:33.519 had our moments. Our house got robbed. You know, 00:14:33.519 --> 00:14:38.440 my mom, our car got stolen three times. So, you 00:14:38.440 --> 00:14:41.659 know, me and my brother got robbed walking home 00:14:41.659 --> 00:14:44.580 from school. Uh, so it, you know, there, it had 00:14:44.580 --> 00:14:46.960 its difficulties, but eventually I, we ended 00:14:46.960 --> 00:14:51.500 up moving to, um, to Pinecrest area, South Florida, 00:14:51.580 --> 00:14:54.100 uh, in the middle of my ninth grade year. And 00:14:54.100 --> 00:14:57.059 it was definitely culture shock after being in 00:14:57.059 --> 00:14:59.879 Miami lakes for so long. Me and my brother were 00:14:59.879 --> 00:15:05.940 like, not used to being around, um, not that 00:15:05.940 --> 00:15:09.159 much, not as much diversity to say, you know, 00:15:09.159 --> 00:15:11.919 and on top of it, it was just, you know. People 00:15:11.919 --> 00:15:13.940 had lots of money and it was just strange. It 00:15:13.940 --> 00:15:15.440 was like a whole different environment. It was 00:15:15.440 --> 00:15:19.379 culture shock. But yeah, I mean, Miami Lakes, 00:15:19.620 --> 00:15:21.620 you know, I didn't know any different from what 00:15:21.620 --> 00:15:23.639 it was just a normal upbringing for me. But yes, 00:15:23.700 --> 00:15:29.639 there was a lot of, you know, burglary and different 00:15:29.639 --> 00:15:34.000 things over there. See, when I was in Hialeah, 00:15:34.120 --> 00:15:36.460 it had this reputation of being dangerous. But 00:15:36.460 --> 00:15:39.940 what I found mostly is it was just so densely 00:15:39.940 --> 00:15:43.070 populated. house that used to have a yard had 00:15:43.070 --> 00:15:44.850 another house on it and there were efficiencies 00:15:44.850 --> 00:15:47.210 and you know so as a firefighter you know you 00:15:47.210 --> 00:15:49.210 think about doing a primary search and there 00:15:49.210 --> 00:15:50.549 might be two or three rooms that you have no 00:15:50.549 --> 00:15:52.950 idea even there and then everything's got bars 00:15:52.950 --> 00:15:56.730 on but um i just felt it was more poverty and 00:15:56.730 --> 00:15:58.529 desperation it wasn't that they were you know 00:15:58.529 --> 00:16:01.809 bad people like in anaheim california i saw full 00:16:01.809 --> 00:16:04.659 -on you know Hispanic gangs murdering each other, 00:16:04.679 --> 00:16:07.320 you know, constantly. So that there was a lot 00:16:07.320 --> 00:16:09.419 more violence there than I saw in Hialeah, but 00:16:09.419 --> 00:16:11.940 it was just so many people. And then a lot of 00:16:11.940 --> 00:16:15.120 them were just so below the poverty line. Well, 00:16:15.259 --> 00:16:17.379 I mean, you know, we had our struggles growing 00:16:17.379 --> 00:16:19.500 up, there was a time period where we were going 00:16:19.500 --> 00:16:21.519 through difficulty, and we ended up sharing a 00:16:21.519 --> 00:16:23.759 two bedroom apartment with another family. So 00:16:23.759 --> 00:16:26.620 me, my mom and my brother, you know, slept on 00:16:26.620 --> 00:16:28.659 a mattress on the floor in one bedroom. And then 00:16:29.149 --> 00:16:31.970 Um, this other woman and her two boys were in 00:16:31.970 --> 00:16:35.129 the other bedroom. It was just, you know, part 00:16:35.129 --> 00:16:38.450 of, part of life back then. But yeah, I mean, 00:16:38.450 --> 00:16:42.629 it's, it was a little bit, that was pretty common, 00:16:42.690 --> 00:16:46.610 I would say. Yeah, absolutely. Well, you mentioned 00:16:46.610 --> 00:16:48.129 about playing softball in middle school. What 00:16:48.129 --> 00:16:50.169 other sports did you play as you progressed through 00:16:50.169 --> 00:16:55.509 high school? Um, well, I played softball and 00:16:55.509 --> 00:17:00.169 baseball when I was younger. Um, and then I was 00:17:00.169 --> 00:17:02.610 on the golf team for a very short amount of time. 00:17:02.669 --> 00:17:05.069 I hated golf. I had a natural swing. It was like 00:17:05.069 --> 00:17:07.569 a thing. Everybody was getting into golf and 00:17:07.569 --> 00:17:09.690 my mom, since she was a single mom, she would 00:17:09.690 --> 00:17:12.670 drop my brother off to go play golf and, or, 00:17:12.710 --> 00:17:15.269 you know, for golf lessons. And I'm like hitting 00:17:15.269 --> 00:17:17.289 balls at the driving range one day. And his coach 00:17:17.289 --> 00:17:20.430 was watching me and I didn't know it. Um, and 00:17:20.430 --> 00:17:21.750 he's like, how long have you been golfing for? 00:17:21.829 --> 00:17:23.990 And I was like, I don't know, about five minutes. 00:17:24.569 --> 00:17:26.369 And he's like, no, how long have you been golfing? 00:17:26.369 --> 00:17:28.690 I'm like five minutes. And he's like, you have 00:17:28.690 --> 00:17:30.250 a natural swing. I was like, don't tell my mom. 00:17:30.289 --> 00:17:32.849 Of course he told my mom. So I ended up having 00:17:32.849 --> 00:17:36.549 to play golf. My mom was very, um, you know, 00:17:36.569 --> 00:17:42.970 she, um, she wanted us to play sports and be 00:17:42.970 --> 00:17:46.109 the best at everything. So anyway, golf became 00:17:46.109 --> 00:17:48.650 the next, the next thing for a while, but I, 00:17:48.730 --> 00:17:51.670 I actually hated it when I was younger. What 00:17:51.670 --> 00:17:54.950 was it you hated about it? I was just really 00:17:54.950 --> 00:17:57.470 active. I wanted to run and jump around and golf. 00:17:57.650 --> 00:17:59.650 It was just, I didn't like all eyes on me. It 00:17:59.650 --> 00:18:01.210 was really quiet. You're lugging around this 00:18:01.210 --> 00:18:04.549 bag. I just, I don't know. I was more into like 00:18:04.549 --> 00:18:07.750 team sports, but growing up in like where I was 00:18:07.750 --> 00:18:09.750 in Miami lakes, I was a really good softball 00:18:09.750 --> 00:18:11.910 player there. But then when I moved to Pinecrest 00:18:11.910 --> 00:18:14.390 where it was like a little bit more affluent. 00:18:14.750 --> 00:18:16.609 Um, everyone had like batting cages in their 00:18:16.609 --> 00:18:18.569 backyards and all kinds of stuff. And I was like 00:18:18.569 --> 00:18:20.130 the worst one on the team that I ended up putting. 00:18:20.730 --> 00:18:24.069 So it just completely changed the dynamic. I 00:18:24.069 --> 00:18:26.250 didn't have the same skills of training as a 00:18:26.250 --> 00:18:28.450 lot of people there, but I didn't, I didn't play 00:18:28.450 --> 00:18:32.069 like a ton of sports in high school. Um, my, 00:18:32.210 --> 00:18:35.309 my, uh, the most fit I ever got was when I decided 00:18:35.309 --> 00:18:37.109 to be a firefighter, it completely changed my 00:18:37.109 --> 00:18:39.940 life. Well, speaking of that, because I know 00:18:39.940 --> 00:18:41.819 you got into that a little bit later, you touched 00:18:41.819 --> 00:18:44.420 on your education. Talk to me about what you 00:18:44.420 --> 00:18:46.160 were dreaming of becoming when you were in high 00:18:46.160 --> 00:18:49.519 school. I wanted to be a doctor when I was in 00:18:49.519 --> 00:18:54.140 high school. By the time I got to college, I 00:18:54.140 --> 00:18:56.619 wasn't really sure I didn't have enough confidence, 00:18:56.680 --> 00:19:00.779 I guess, in my... I went to three high schools 00:19:00.779 --> 00:19:03.200 and I was kind of like over it, over school. 00:19:03.420 --> 00:19:06.819 And so when I started at FAU, I was a photography 00:19:06.819 --> 00:19:12.950 major. Um, and, um, I switched majors quite a 00:19:12.950 --> 00:19:15.490 few times. It was photography. I went into like, 00:19:15.849 --> 00:19:22.150 um, undecided. I did psychology. I switched it 00:19:22.150 --> 00:19:27.289 to, um, uh, what did I switch it to? Uh, well, 00:19:27.390 --> 00:19:29.329 anyway, I switched it a bunch of times. Finally, 00:19:29.349 --> 00:19:33.440 when I got a D in photography and I. Got an A 00:19:33.440 --> 00:19:35.779 in a biology class that I didn't even go to and 00:19:35.779 --> 00:19:38.119 barely studied for. I decided maybe I should 00:19:38.119 --> 00:19:43.400 switch. So I went ahead and was like a few years 00:19:43.400 --> 00:19:45.220 and became pre -med. So it took me six years 00:19:45.220 --> 00:19:47.299 to get my bachelor's because I just didn't know 00:19:47.299 --> 00:19:49.339 what I was doing. I changed degrees so many times. 00:19:50.920 --> 00:19:53.420 What happened to that path? Because I saw on 00:19:53.420 --> 00:19:56.980 LinkedIn, I got this right, my printer's not 00:19:56.980 --> 00:20:01.059 working properly. You were an invertebrate cell 00:20:01.059 --> 00:20:04.750 culturist. So that doesn't sound like a doctor. 00:20:05.950 --> 00:20:12.109 No, it's not. So basically, yes, I became an 00:20:12.109 --> 00:20:16.410 invertebrate cell culturist for a while. I forgot 00:20:16.410 --> 00:20:19.410 it says that on LinkedIn. I never go on there. 00:20:19.549 --> 00:20:26.130 But basically, my overall GPA wasn't that great 00:20:26.130 --> 00:20:30.490 from all the undecidedness in my undergrad studies. 00:20:31.069 --> 00:20:34.470 So I went ahead and decided I was going to get 00:20:34.470 --> 00:20:36.849 a master's degree. My plan was to do a master's 00:20:36.849 --> 00:20:39.750 on thesis, study for the MCAT, boost my GPA and 00:20:39.750 --> 00:20:43.130 go to med school. So the day after I graduated, 00:20:43.289 --> 00:20:46.390 the FAU has a satellite campus up here in Fort 00:20:46.390 --> 00:20:48.789 Pierce at Harbor Branch. It's a marine biology 00:20:48.789 --> 00:20:52.190 institute. And the day after I graduated, we 00:20:52.190 --> 00:20:55.769 came up here to visit my brother and see where 00:20:55.769 --> 00:21:00.210 he was living. And we ended up meeting. I checked 00:21:00.210 --> 00:21:02.009 out the campus because he was he was a marine 00:21:02.009 --> 00:21:04.569 bio major. So we checked out the campus up here. 00:21:04.910 --> 00:21:09.549 And I ended up meeting the director of the biomedical 00:21:09.549 --> 00:21:13.630 marine sciences department in a CVS. And my brother 00:21:13.630 --> 00:21:19.190 recognized her and she basically, you know, just 00:21:19.190 --> 00:21:21.509 was like. And what do you do? And I told her, 00:21:21.569 --> 00:21:23.970 oh, I just graduated yesterday. And she's like, 00:21:23.970 --> 00:21:26.250 and when? I was like, I got a bachelor's in biology 00:21:26.250 --> 00:21:28.250 and I'm planning to get my master's in biomedical 00:21:28.250 --> 00:21:32.329 sciences and, you know, you know, study for the 00:21:32.329 --> 00:21:34.109 MCAT, go to med school. And she said, oh, well, 00:21:34.170 --> 00:21:36.029 I'm the director of the biomedical marine sciences 00:21:36.029 --> 00:21:38.890 department, you know, over here at Harbor Branch. 00:21:39.289 --> 00:21:41.769 And I said, oh, really? And she said, do you 00:21:41.769 --> 00:21:46.589 have a job? I said, I'm a bartender unless you 00:21:46.589 --> 00:21:48.859 want to give me a better job. And she said, I 00:21:48.859 --> 00:21:51.839 think I do. And I literally, that's how I ended 00:21:51.839 --> 00:21:54.259 up here. I, she offered me a job right there 00:21:54.259 --> 00:21:57.319 in CVS. We had a meeting a week later and then 00:21:57.319 --> 00:21:59.400 I moved up to Fort Pierce and started working 00:21:59.400 --> 00:22:03.099 for her. She became my thesis advisor. I ended 00:22:03.099 --> 00:22:06.980 up doing a thesis. She convinced me. Um, so yeah, 00:22:07.019 --> 00:22:09.799 that's how I, uh, so basically I got this job, 00:22:09.859 --> 00:22:11.980 which was supposed to be while I'm working on 00:22:11.980 --> 00:22:14.519 my master's degree. She said, since you're doing 00:22:14.519 --> 00:22:16.299 all this research, she wanted me to immortalize 00:22:16.299 --> 00:22:20.599 the sponge cell. Now I was not a, um, I was not 00:22:20.599 --> 00:22:23.059 a Marine biologist. I didn't know anything about 00:22:23.059 --> 00:22:26.619 Marine anything. I was pre -med, uh, human biology. 00:22:26.880 --> 00:22:29.079 I knew a little bit. I took, you know, bio one 00:22:29.079 --> 00:22:33.210 and two. Um, and she, uh, she's like, oh, I want 00:22:33.210 --> 00:22:34.950 you to immortalize this sponge cell. And I'm 00:22:34.950 --> 00:22:36.490 like, okay, great. Yeah, I'll do that. It was 00:22:36.490 --> 00:22:38.029 one of those like fake it till you make it. I 00:22:38.029 --> 00:22:39.710 was like, I'll just read a bunch of research 00:22:39.710 --> 00:22:41.349 papers and figure out what she's talking about. 00:22:42.490 --> 00:22:46.309 But basically when I started working for her 00:22:46.309 --> 00:22:49.869 as a lab assistant, which was like doing invertebrate 00:22:49.869 --> 00:22:52.710 cell culture, she's like, since you're doing 00:22:52.710 --> 00:22:54.450 this project anyway, you might as well turn it 00:22:54.450 --> 00:22:58.269 into a thesis. So a one -year non -thesis program 00:22:58.269 --> 00:23:04.279 turned into a three -year thesis program. And 00:23:04.279 --> 00:23:09.660 it took a while. So by the time I finished my 00:23:09.660 --> 00:23:13.740 master's thesis, I was kind of burnt out and 00:23:13.740 --> 00:23:17.700 didn't really feel like doing another, you know, 00:23:17.700 --> 00:23:19.599 however many years in med school and residency. 00:23:19.960 --> 00:23:23.319 I ended up actually taking off to Panama for 00:23:23.319 --> 00:23:26.579 six months and living there before I came back 00:23:26.579 --> 00:23:30.420 to figure out what I was going to do next. How 00:23:30.420 --> 00:23:33.500 does one immortalize a sponge cell? Does it have 00:23:33.500 --> 00:23:35.740 to excel in battle or something? Or what's the 00:23:35.740 --> 00:23:39.650 process? Well, you know, it's funny you say that 00:23:39.650 --> 00:23:41.450 because my boss didn't tell me she'd been working 00:23:41.450 --> 00:23:44.630 on it for 30 years. And she wanted it to be my 00:23:44.630 --> 00:23:46.890 master's thesis project. I ended up changing 00:23:46.890 --> 00:23:50.690 my project. But basically, the goal is to have 00:23:50.690 --> 00:23:53.730 a continuously dividing cell line in a lab, which 00:23:53.730 --> 00:23:56.230 we have from human cells, which originated from 00:23:56.230 --> 00:23:59.170 Henrietta Lacks, right? So we have like a continuously 00:23:59.170 --> 00:24:01.230 dividing human cell line, but they hadn't been 00:24:01.230 --> 00:24:03.150 able to produce it with sponge cells, which is 00:24:03.150 --> 00:24:07.119 like the lowest. uh form you know the lowest 00:24:07.119 --> 00:24:09.319 animal the most simple animal of the animal kingdom 00:24:09.319 --> 00:24:11.359 and yet there's still so much we don't know about 00:24:11.359 --> 00:24:15.960 it but the whole reason why we were they were 00:24:15.960 --> 00:24:18.680 trying to basically grow sponge cells in a lab 00:24:18.680 --> 00:24:22.940 setting was because um they they make these uh 00:24:22.940 --> 00:24:25.319 that part of the research at harbor branch was 00:24:25.319 --> 00:24:29.119 to find um chemicals or some secondary metabolites 00:24:29.119 --> 00:24:31.500 basically bioactive compounds that they test 00:24:31.500 --> 00:24:35.759 against cancer cells so basically There's tons 00:24:35.759 --> 00:24:38.599 of like novel compounds that they find in marine 00:24:38.599 --> 00:24:40.900 organisms like sea cucumbers and coral reefs 00:24:40.900 --> 00:24:43.859 and sponges that they test against cancer cells, 00:24:44.059 --> 00:24:49.269 you know, for new medication. So my project ended 00:24:49.269 --> 00:24:53.329 up switching to a sponge because I did not, in 00:24:53.329 --> 00:24:56.970 fact, immortalize the sponge cell. But I ended 00:24:56.970 --> 00:24:59.430 up switching to a project where there was already 00:24:59.430 --> 00:25:02.069 a sponge called Axonella corregata that created 00:25:02.069 --> 00:25:05.250 a tumor suppressant compound called Stevencene. 00:25:05.809 --> 00:25:09.589 So it was basically my project became how can 00:25:09.589 --> 00:25:12.490 I make that sponge overproduce the compound by 00:25:12.490 --> 00:25:14.269 different stressors and things like that and 00:25:14.269 --> 00:25:17.940 checking its gene expression. That's what I ended 00:25:17.940 --> 00:25:21.779 up doing for a while. It's so crazy. I was just 00:25:21.779 --> 00:25:23.799 talking to one of my guests, Angela, I just had 00:25:23.799 --> 00:25:26.119 on the show and she was in the holistic space 00:25:26.119 --> 00:25:30.240 too. She actually used Ibogaine, so a psychedelic. 00:25:30.720 --> 00:25:33.759 to reverse her autoimmune disease. So you hear 00:25:33.759 --> 00:25:35.740 normally a lot of the mental health benefits, 00:25:35.859 --> 00:25:37.440 but this was actually a physiological benefit. 00:25:37.720 --> 00:25:40.599 But she was also talking about bee stings and 00:25:40.599 --> 00:25:43.680 cancer. And apparently there's evidence showing 00:25:43.680 --> 00:25:46.619 that that will kind of be almost like nature's 00:25:46.619 --> 00:25:49.259 chemo without destroying the entire body. And 00:25:49.259 --> 00:25:51.440 then fingers crossed, you hope that it restarts 00:25:51.440 --> 00:25:54.039 all the good cells again. This one actually supposedly 00:25:54.039 --> 00:25:56.259 leaves the good cells alone, but I'd never heard 00:25:56.259 --> 00:26:00.890 that before. Yeah, I haven't, I haven't heard 00:26:00.890 --> 00:26:05.309 of that, but I mean, there it's, I think a lot 00:26:05.309 --> 00:26:09.089 of our health is based on lifestyle and nutrition 00:26:09.089 --> 00:26:13.490 for sure. Um, there's a, there's a lot of things 00:26:13.490 --> 00:26:15.630 that you can do that I think really make a big 00:26:15.630 --> 00:26:17.730 difference in cancer. Plus cancer research is 00:26:17.730 --> 00:26:22.410 difficult. I mean, they find, um, for example, 00:26:22.650 --> 00:26:25.130 Steven scene, they, they found, you know, reduced 00:26:25.130 --> 00:26:29.950 tumors and, um, It still is not a drug that's 00:26:29.950 --> 00:26:35.829 used because. You know, there's a lot of preventatives 00:26:35.829 --> 00:26:38.509 and, you know, checks and balances to try and 00:26:38.509 --> 00:26:41.210 make something be like a cancer drug. And if 00:26:41.210 --> 00:26:43.289 it doesn't make, you know, big pharma lots of 00:26:43.289 --> 00:26:45.410 money, it isn't probably most likely going to 00:26:45.410 --> 00:26:48.349 make it through. But, yeah, I mean, it's really 00:26:48.349 --> 00:26:51.390 interesting. There's like there's something that 00:26:51.390 --> 00:26:53.829 like drives me crazy that I kind of like want 00:26:53.829 --> 00:26:57.490 to talk about with cancer real quick is. You 00:26:57.490 --> 00:27:00.670 know how everyone has like these nicotine pouches 00:27:00.670 --> 00:27:03.190 now and they're like, oh, it's a nootropic and 00:27:03.190 --> 00:27:06.789 all this stuff is in. And, you know, when I was 00:27:06.789 --> 00:27:08.630 in college, I took a biology of cancer class 00:27:08.630 --> 00:27:13.869 and there was and it was more based off tobacco 00:27:13.869 --> 00:27:16.130 smoke. But obviously, everyone knows that cigarettes 00:27:16.130 --> 00:27:18.990 cause cancer. But like as far as carcinogen goes, 00:27:19.150 --> 00:27:22.190 like carcinogens are caused by just about everything. 00:27:22.289 --> 00:27:25.680 Right. like literally everything like you know 00:27:25.680 --> 00:27:28.240 polyester in your clothing leeches plastics and 00:27:28.240 --> 00:27:32.140 you you know using teflon pans and inflammation 00:27:32.140 --> 00:27:34.200 of any kind in your body but most of the time 00:27:34.200 --> 00:27:36.319 what a carcinogen is doing is affecting your 00:27:36.319 --> 00:27:39.799 dna right it's causing like a mutation or a mismatched 00:27:39.799 --> 00:27:43.640 like base pair and all these things but cigarette 00:27:43.640 --> 00:27:48.500 smoke actually attacks specifically it doesn't 00:27:48.500 --> 00:27:50.880 attack your dna it attacks a protein well it 00:27:50.880 --> 00:27:55.289 attacks It attacks a gene that creates a protein 00:27:55.289 --> 00:27:58.390 that actually protects your DNA. So you have 00:27:58.390 --> 00:28:01.650 this protein called P53 that basically goes around 00:28:01.650 --> 00:28:04.849 fixing all the issues with your cells from carcinogens. 00:28:05.089 --> 00:28:06.990 Like there's a reason we're not all riddled with 00:28:06.990 --> 00:28:10.369 cancer when we have all these carcinogens we're 00:28:10.369 --> 00:28:13.309 taking in continuously. And P53 is something 00:28:13.309 --> 00:28:15.190 that goes around and protects you. It's basically 00:28:15.190 --> 00:28:18.230 like when he talked, it was Dr. Hurtman, when 00:28:18.230 --> 00:28:20.390 I took biology of cancer, he said it was like 00:28:20.390 --> 00:28:23.160 the mother protein. Um, and cigarette smoke and 00:28:23.160 --> 00:28:25.319 everything affects the gene that produces that 00:28:25.319 --> 00:28:30.019 protein. The TP 53 is the gene. Well, years later, 00:28:30.140 --> 00:28:32.019 everyone's promoting nicotine right now. And 00:28:32.019 --> 00:28:33.220 there's lots of people that are like, it's just 00:28:33.220 --> 00:28:35.619 nicotine. It's not tobacco, which has all the 00:28:35.619 --> 00:28:38.779 other additives. And yes, there are benefits 00:28:38.779 --> 00:28:40.940 that they've been proving for nicotine, but I. 00:28:41.519 --> 00:28:43.200 I'm over here like, what are we talking about? 00:28:43.299 --> 00:28:46.819 Is there still not the issue of P53 and its effects, 00:28:47.059 --> 00:28:49.259 right? So I dug a little deeper to make sure 00:28:49.259 --> 00:28:51.779 that I'm not crazy and the research hasn't changed 00:28:51.779 --> 00:28:53.980 because I think everything should be based off 00:28:53.980 --> 00:28:57.140 of actual science and validity when you're going 00:28:57.140 --> 00:29:01.700 to do something or, you know. prove something. 00:29:01.799 --> 00:29:03.859 And with nicotine, they're like, oh, well, it's 00:29:03.859 --> 00:29:05.940 got all these cognitive benefits and it may help 00:29:05.940 --> 00:29:08.160 with Alzheimer's and all that. And that's great. 00:29:08.200 --> 00:29:10.000 But you still have to consider the risk versus 00:29:10.000 --> 00:29:12.240 reward because it does still have effects on 00:29:12.240 --> 00:29:14.680 P53. The one thing that's going around trying 00:29:14.680 --> 00:29:18.539 to prevent you from cancer and over 50 % of cancers 00:29:18.539 --> 00:29:24.619 have a mutation in the P53 gene today. When you're 00:29:24.619 --> 00:29:27.420 considering nicotine and using it as a stimulant 00:29:27.420 --> 00:29:30.039 and just using it in its pure form, they've done 00:29:30.039 --> 00:29:32.220 studies where it's not just inhaling it through 00:29:32.220 --> 00:29:34.259 tobacco smoke. They're using pure nicotine as 00:29:34.259 --> 00:29:36.880 an injection or ingestion in different studies, 00:29:36.940 --> 00:29:38.660 and they found that it still does increase tumor 00:29:38.660 --> 00:29:41.819 risk. Basically, when you have a gene mutation, 00:29:42.079 --> 00:29:44.619 it causes uncontrolled cell growth, which turns 00:29:44.619 --> 00:29:48.750 into a tumor, and P53 will stop that. That's 00:29:48.750 --> 00:29:50.589 my rant. I just wanted to put it out there because 00:29:50.589 --> 00:29:52.430 there's so much research right now promoting 00:29:52.430 --> 00:29:56.250 nicotine and I just, you have to have your risk 00:29:56.250 --> 00:29:58.329 versus reward. There's other ways to improve 00:29:58.329 --> 00:30:00.630 cognitive function like using lion's mane or 00:30:00.630 --> 00:30:02.750 something like that that's a little bit healthier. 00:30:03.849 --> 00:30:07.410 But anyway. I'm so glad that you know, ran away. 00:30:07.569 --> 00:30:09.349 That's why I love these long form conversations. 00:30:09.569 --> 00:30:10.849 Cause you know, we, of course we're going to 00:30:10.849 --> 00:30:12.569 get to firefighting, but this is, you know, this 00:30:12.569 --> 00:30:14.809 is what I call the space between the lines, people's 00:30:14.809 --> 00:30:17.529 life stories and experiences. And if you look 00:30:17.529 --> 00:30:20.329 at a lot of studies, I was talking to a few fire 00:30:20.329 --> 00:30:22.970 researchers recently, you know, we use that term 00:30:22.970 --> 00:30:24.950 culturally competent clinicians when it comes 00:30:24.950 --> 00:30:28.130 to mental health, but I realized there's a massive 00:30:28.130 --> 00:30:30.769 need for culturally competent research. Because 00:30:30.769 --> 00:30:32.730 you will get someone, for example, who's never 00:30:32.730 --> 00:30:34.930 really even been around firefighters and then 00:30:34.930 --> 00:30:37.230 they'll do spend all this time and money on, 00:30:37.269 --> 00:30:41.029 you know, is the 4896 better than the 2472 rather 00:30:41.029 --> 00:30:42.890 than going, well, what's the actual question 00:30:42.890 --> 00:30:45.509 we need to answer? You know, maybe we should 00:30:45.509 --> 00:30:48.269 say, well, this 56 hour work, let's compare that 00:30:48.269 --> 00:30:51.150 to a 42 hour work. Now that's a study worth doing. 00:30:51.210 --> 00:30:52.750 You know, what are we doing to these people? 00:30:53.390 --> 00:30:56.309 And there's so much research out there showing 00:30:56.309 --> 00:30:58.869 that sleep deprivation shift work is a known 00:30:58.869 --> 00:31:02.700 carcinogen. But again, there's that solid evidence 00:31:02.700 --> 00:31:04.599 and the fire service is turning their head and 00:31:04.599 --> 00:31:06.799 the same with the nicotine thing. I'm sure there's 00:31:06.799 --> 00:31:09.180 studies that show benefits, but who's funding 00:31:09.180 --> 00:31:12.019 those studies? Is it the tobacco companies? And 00:31:12.019 --> 00:31:14.579 then what was actually that parameter of benefit 00:31:14.579 --> 00:31:17.759 compared to, like you said, exercise, ice baths, 00:31:17.759 --> 00:31:19.920 lion's pain, whatever the holistic alternative 00:31:19.920 --> 00:31:24.339 is? Yeah, absolutely. I think that this is where 00:31:24.339 --> 00:31:26.579 science and research is so difficult because 00:31:26.579 --> 00:31:29.200 you can basically prove anything right, right? 00:31:29.920 --> 00:31:34.019 You can, there's so much research on there's 00:31:34.019 --> 00:31:35.920 benefits to this and then someone else will do 00:31:35.920 --> 00:31:37.779 a study and there's negatives. And I actually 00:31:37.779 --> 00:31:41.740 believe in on both sides, right? It's really 00:31:41.740 --> 00:31:44.079 difficult to look at the science and you kind 00:31:44.079 --> 00:31:46.960 of have to have like, I always say like your 00:31:46.960 --> 00:31:49.680 risk versus reward, where they have done studies 00:31:49.680 --> 00:31:52.539 that nicotine is assisting with Alzheimer's. 00:31:52.539 --> 00:31:55.400 Now they don't have as many like long -term effects 00:31:55.400 --> 00:31:58.640 on like. how far nicotine actually benefits you 00:31:58.640 --> 00:32:02.059 so like the studies aren't as long term as they 00:32:02.059 --> 00:32:05.740 you know they haven't been studied for as long 00:32:05.740 --> 00:32:09.319 but um there are cognitive benefits yes it does 00:32:09.319 --> 00:32:12.019 help stimulate you but like really are you going 00:32:12.019 --> 00:32:15.039 to take that risk knowing that it's affecting 00:32:15.039 --> 00:32:17.000 the protein that's preventing you from cancer 00:32:17.000 --> 00:32:19.720 right so there there's lots of things that you 00:32:19.720 --> 00:32:22.369 can argue either way i mean just you know brown 00:32:22.369 --> 00:32:26.150 rice versus white rice right they have like tons 00:32:26.150 --> 00:32:28.769 of studies and you can you can look at both of 00:32:28.769 --> 00:32:30.809 them like which is healthier for you one is like 00:32:30.809 --> 00:32:33.269 a whole grain one you know the other one it's 00:32:33.269 --> 00:32:35.230 like oh well right white rice isn't good for 00:32:35.230 --> 00:32:38.410 you but then it you know white rice doesn't contain 00:32:38.410 --> 00:32:40.049 like a lot of like the oxalates and different 00:32:40.049 --> 00:32:42.049 things that can cause issues it's it's really 00:32:42.049 --> 00:32:44.210 what research you study and it can get really 00:32:44.210 --> 00:32:46.990 overwhelming because a lot of a lot of health 00:32:46.990 --> 00:32:50.549 things have have points on both sides, right? 00:32:50.690 --> 00:32:54.210 So it's really trying to sift through that and 00:32:54.210 --> 00:32:57.789 pick, like, the overall best choice. I have a 00:32:57.789 --> 00:33:00.910 hard time debating with people, especially firemen, 00:33:00.930 --> 00:33:02.829 because they don't, like, usually research real 00:33:02.829 --> 00:33:06.490 studies or use, like, legitimate research sites 00:33:06.490 --> 00:33:12.339 to base stuff. But it's very, like... I always 00:33:12.339 --> 00:33:15.480 have an open mind. Like I'm not because when 00:33:15.480 --> 00:33:18.099 the nicotine thing came up, I was like, OK, well, 00:33:18.220 --> 00:33:21.579 I remember in college about P53. I wonder if 00:33:21.579 --> 00:33:23.279 that still applies. Was it more just cigarette 00:33:23.279 --> 00:33:26.220 smoke? There's so much research promoting it. 00:33:26.440 --> 00:33:28.519 You know, a lot of people are using it. It gives 00:33:28.519 --> 00:33:30.180 you a dopamine effect, but it gives you a dopamine 00:33:30.180 --> 00:33:32.880 effect because it's an addiction. Right. So it 00:33:32.880 --> 00:33:35.559 causes that quick dopamine. It causes. because 00:33:35.559 --> 00:33:39.539 of that it causes addiction and therefore like 00:33:39.539 --> 00:33:41.859 a lot of people want to have good reasons why 00:33:41.859 --> 00:33:44.119 they can continue on with their addictions right 00:33:44.119 --> 00:33:48.359 so but like we're doing the continued research 00:33:48.359 --> 00:33:51.420 it was without without fail still showing that 00:33:51.420 --> 00:33:54.019 yes nicotine still has these effects so it's 00:33:54.019 --> 00:33:57.640 just everything you research there there there 00:33:57.640 --> 00:33:59.700 are going to be positives and negatives to all 00:33:59.700 --> 00:34:01.519 of them you just have to like there could be 00:34:01.519 --> 00:34:04.230 positives and negatives to alcohol Right. It 00:34:04.230 --> 00:34:06.950 depends on the amount you're drinking. It can 00:34:06.950 --> 00:34:09.090 still cause inflammation in your body. But a 00:34:09.090 --> 00:34:11.449 lot of a lot of everything that you're putting 00:34:11.449 --> 00:34:13.889 in your body or like putting in your life is 00:34:13.889 --> 00:34:15.710 going to be dependent on how healthy you are, 00:34:15.769 --> 00:34:20.570 which is actually scientifically proven. You 00:34:20.570 --> 00:34:23.289 fight more inflammation and your immune system 00:34:23.289 --> 00:34:26.630 works better by being happier and having good 00:34:26.630 --> 00:34:28.250 relationships in your life. And it completely 00:34:28.250 --> 00:34:30.489 affects the way things respond in your body. 00:34:31.340 --> 00:34:35.260 Everything can be altered. It's just, I could 00:34:35.260 --> 00:34:38.599 go on about all this stuff forever. So what you're 00:34:38.599 --> 00:34:41.519 saying, if I can sift through the data, is if 00:34:41.519 --> 00:34:44.440 we had a global pandemic, maybe don't tell people 00:34:44.440 --> 00:34:47.360 to stay in their homes, watch TV, eat fast food, 00:34:47.380 --> 00:34:50.289 and not see their family or friends ever. That's 00:34:50.289 --> 00:34:54.570 like the worst thing you can do. Note to self, 00:34:54.630 --> 00:34:57.510 America. Yeah, they've already been proving how... 00:34:57.510 --> 00:35:02.849 So Dr. Hartman, I keep referencing him. Dr. Hartman 00:35:02.849 --> 00:35:06.349 was an instructor at FAU my last semester, and 00:35:06.349 --> 00:35:08.849 he taught biology of cancer. And he said a bunch 00:35:08.849 --> 00:35:11.440 of things that now they're just... bringing into 00:35:11.440 --> 00:35:13.539 light. He said that you needed to get at least 00:35:13.539 --> 00:35:15.760 15 minutes of sun a day without any sunscreen. 00:35:16.159 --> 00:35:19.280 He said you needed to eat a handful of blueberries 00:35:19.280 --> 00:35:20.960 because it's important to have antioxidants. 00:35:21.519 --> 00:35:24.820 He said that macrophages in our own immune system 00:35:24.820 --> 00:35:27.159 is what's going to help cure most cancers and 00:35:27.159 --> 00:35:31.219 things and lifestyle and exercise and eating 00:35:31.219 --> 00:35:35.179 healthy. He was promoting that in 2009 when I 00:35:35.179 --> 00:35:38.000 took his class and it's just now becoming more 00:35:38.000 --> 00:35:40.699 and more apparent and I love it. you know when 00:35:40.699 --> 00:35:43.059 i took his class it was it was blowing my mind 00:35:43.059 --> 00:35:46.800 just some of the things he was saying so yeah 00:35:46.800 --> 00:35:51.159 i think sunlight and screens and or not using 00:35:51.159 --> 00:35:53.699 screens and getting outside and moving your body 00:35:53.699 --> 00:35:55.800 and getting your lymphatic system moving and 00:35:55.800 --> 00:35:58.739 you know detox all these things are super important 00:35:58.739 --> 00:36:01.099 for your well -being i mean they've proven relationships 00:36:01.099 --> 00:36:04.460 how much it affects your life right like loneliness 00:36:04.460 --> 00:36:07.719 can be just as deadly as smoking 15 cigarettes 00:36:07.719 --> 00:36:11.329 a day right um being in a relationship, but a 00:36:11.329 --> 00:36:15.690 healthy relationship can actually make you live 00:36:15.690 --> 00:36:19.030 longer. It can increase your immune system. It 00:36:19.030 --> 00:36:21.230 reduces your cortisol levels, but obviously the 00:36:21.230 --> 00:36:23.409 opposite is also true for a toxic relationship. 00:36:23.750 --> 00:36:27.269 So it's just, and there's this thing called the 00:36:27.269 --> 00:36:31.190 dependency paradox, right? Which is. It's more 00:36:31.190 --> 00:36:33.110 an attachment theory. I like to read psychology 00:36:33.110 --> 00:36:35.309 stuff sometimes. So attachment theory is just 00:36:35.309 --> 00:36:37.610 the ways in which people are in relationships. 00:36:37.809 --> 00:36:39.889 There's like a secure attach, anxious attachment, 00:36:40.190 --> 00:36:43.170 avoidant, and then disorganized. But basically. 00:36:44.230 --> 00:36:47.130 There's this thing called the dependency paradox, 00:36:47.469 --> 00:36:50.170 right? Where we're taught to be like, you got 00:36:50.170 --> 00:36:53.010 to create your own happiness. You have to do 00:36:53.010 --> 00:36:54.829 things that make you happy and nobody should 00:36:54.829 --> 00:36:57.429 affect your happiness. But in reality, people 00:36:57.429 --> 00:36:59.929 affect us all the time. In fact, relationships 00:36:59.929 --> 00:37:01.769 are the most important things we have in our 00:37:01.769 --> 00:37:06.670 lives, right? It affects like... how you are 00:37:06.670 --> 00:37:08.809 at home. It affects how you are at work. It affects 00:37:08.809 --> 00:37:11.289 the choices you make. I mean, a lot of times 00:37:11.289 --> 00:37:13.710 relationships might be the most important thing 00:37:13.710 --> 00:37:18.070 you have going on. And what the dependency paradox 00:37:18.070 --> 00:37:21.750 says is basically everyone is dependent in some 00:37:21.750 --> 00:37:23.909 way on their relationship. And this could be 00:37:23.909 --> 00:37:26.610 other types of relationships, not just partnership. 00:37:28.030 --> 00:37:30.090 you have a dependency whether you like it or 00:37:30.090 --> 00:37:32.190 not on these relationships but the healthier 00:37:32.190 --> 00:37:34.650 the relationship the more you actually become 00:37:34.650 --> 00:37:36.730 independent which is why it's called the dependency 00:37:36.730 --> 00:37:39.789 paradox so the more you can rely on someone and 00:37:39.789 --> 00:37:42.929 feel trusted have trust and feel secure the more 00:37:42.929 --> 00:37:45.510 you're able to go off and do your own thing and 00:37:45.510 --> 00:37:48.150 be an entrepreneur go work on your life create 00:37:48.150 --> 00:37:49.869 all these things because you're secure and you 00:37:49.869 --> 00:37:51.889 don't actually have to worry about that that 00:37:51.889 --> 00:37:54.469 part of your life so it's kind of interesting 00:37:54.469 --> 00:37:58.460 how we're always taught to just you know, make 00:37:58.460 --> 00:38:00.559 your own happiness. No one can affect you, but 00:38:00.559 --> 00:38:02.940 I mean, people affect us all the time. And when 00:38:02.940 --> 00:38:05.199 you're in some sort of toxic relationship, whether 00:38:05.199 --> 00:38:09.380 it's a, you know, a friendship or whether it's 00:38:09.380 --> 00:38:12.969 work related or whether it's home life. You can't 00:38:12.969 --> 00:38:14.710 really thrive. You think about it, you're not 00:38:14.710 --> 00:38:16.590 really thriving. And I think a lot of the mental 00:38:16.590 --> 00:38:20.349 health issues with firemen, it's truly like our 00:38:20.349 --> 00:38:22.949 relationships that affect us almost more than 00:38:22.949 --> 00:38:25.269 the calls. That's just compounding effects, right? 00:38:25.510 --> 00:38:28.650 It's our relationships with our, you know, who 00:38:28.650 --> 00:38:30.849 we're with at work, our relationships at home. 00:38:30.969 --> 00:38:35.690 So, you know, it really all ties in. It's been 00:38:35.690 --> 00:38:38.050 really interesting kind of unpacking all of this 00:38:38.050 --> 00:38:41.289 the last almost nine years now. It's crazy. You 00:38:41.289 --> 00:38:43.250 know, these kind of aha moments that I've had 00:38:43.250 --> 00:38:48.250 as a sponge myself, an invertebrate. But the 00:38:48.250 --> 00:38:51.530 big awakening for us was the impact of unaddressed 00:38:51.530 --> 00:38:54.869 childhood trauma on us. And addressed, I truly 00:38:54.869 --> 00:38:57.110 believe, post -traumatic growth, you can turn 00:38:57.110 --> 00:38:59.489 that into a strength. So I think it's not, you 00:38:59.489 --> 00:39:01.929 know, something to be, you know, sad about. It's 00:39:01.929 --> 00:39:04.130 just we have to see it, identify it, work through 00:39:04.130 --> 00:39:09.489 it, and then create that strength. Oh, my goodness. 00:39:09.590 --> 00:39:12.489 Sleep deprivation, that was one that really made 00:39:12.489 --> 00:39:13.969 me start this conversation in the first place, 00:39:14.010 --> 00:39:16.269 this podcast, the impact of that on everything, 00:39:16.510 --> 00:39:18.690 including our mental health, not to mention cancer 00:39:18.690 --> 00:39:21.369 and all the other things. But then the most recent 00:39:21.369 --> 00:39:23.309 one was the impact of organizational betrayal 00:39:23.309 --> 00:39:27.090 and toxic working environments and how much that 00:39:27.090 --> 00:39:30.130 factors into the mental health struggles of our 00:39:30.130 --> 00:39:32.329 first responders. If you're a police officer 00:39:32.329 --> 00:39:35.949 and you had a justified shoot and then your organization 00:39:35.949 --> 00:39:39.300 throws you under the bus or... You micromanage 00:39:39.300 --> 00:39:41.559 by, you know, your fire chief or whatever it 00:39:41.559 --> 00:39:46.099 is. You speak to these super motivated, passionate 00:39:46.099 --> 00:39:49.739 firefighters. And it's not, you know, the job 00:39:49.739 --> 00:39:51.920 that is beaten down. It's the fact that they 00:39:51.920 --> 00:39:53.760 get no support. It's the fact that, you know, 00:39:53.760 --> 00:39:57.500 there is that toxic environment. And so I think 00:39:57.500 --> 00:39:59.400 that has to be addressed. Because, I mean, there's 00:39:59.400 --> 00:40:03.079 one really tragic story. A friend of mine who 00:40:03.079 --> 00:40:06.019 is a movement, you know, strength and conditioning 00:40:06.019 --> 00:40:09.070 coach. And he featured a few Southern California 00:40:09.070 --> 00:40:10.889 firefighters in this video they did for one of 00:40:10.889 --> 00:40:13.690 the companies. And one of the young women ended 00:40:13.690 --> 00:40:16.710 up taking her own life a few months later. And 00:40:16.710 --> 00:40:18.369 there was supposed to be organizational bullying 00:40:18.369 --> 00:40:21.369 going on in that particular environment. So this 00:40:21.369 --> 00:40:23.150 is something that we need to talk about because 00:40:23.150 --> 00:40:26.289 if the wrong people are in positions of power, 00:40:26.510 --> 00:40:29.969 of leadership, it can create such toxicity. It 00:40:29.969 --> 00:40:32.989 can literally destroy an entire department. I 00:40:32.989 --> 00:40:35.190 think it's one of the biggest cancers of the 00:40:35.190 --> 00:40:40.119 fire service. I truly, I think it, um, you know, 00:40:40.179 --> 00:40:43.400 being in the position I'm in being a female in 00:40:43.400 --> 00:40:45.199 the fire service and being an instructor in the 00:40:45.199 --> 00:40:49.780 fire service, I've had my share of, um, bullying 00:40:49.780 --> 00:40:55.679 my, my different, uh, you know, there's been 00:40:55.679 --> 00:40:58.139 some difficult times I've really had to work 00:40:58.139 --> 00:41:02.119 through. And I will say, um, having the support 00:41:02.119 --> 00:41:06.090 of your crew or, or positive. people on mentorship 00:41:06.090 --> 00:41:09.929 in the fire services is it's night and day. It 00:41:09.929 --> 00:41:12.349 changes everything. Um, I went through a really 00:41:12.349 --> 00:41:14.989 difficult time and I, I, you know, I was, I was 00:41:14.989 --> 00:41:16.469 having a difficult time at work. I was having 00:41:16.469 --> 00:41:18.869 a difficult time in my personal life and I was 00:41:18.869 --> 00:41:21.889 ready to leave the fire service. Um, thank God 00:41:21.889 --> 00:41:25.030 for, for people like Aaron Heller, my boss, um, 00:41:25.150 --> 00:41:27.869 for on -scene training associates. He, um, him 00:41:27.869 --> 00:41:29.610 and all the guys that work for that company, 00:41:29.829 --> 00:41:34.849 uh, they are true gentlemen who have, who. really 00:41:34.849 --> 00:41:37.650 helped me through some really difficult times 00:41:37.650 --> 00:41:40.210 in my life and and you know you have these amazing 00:41:40.210 --> 00:41:44.489 firemen that um that truly are family like it's 00:41:44.489 --> 00:41:46.510 it's incredible because the fire service can 00:41:46.510 --> 00:41:48.769 be the biggest family but it can be a toxic family 00:41:48.769 --> 00:41:51.869 or it can be a super healthy amazing family that 00:41:51.869 --> 00:41:56.929 you um absolutely like needed and it's just a 00:41:56.929 --> 00:41:59.750 hundred percent I think I think what you're talking 00:41:59.750 --> 00:42:02.250 about with the mental health and um betrayal 00:42:02.250 --> 00:42:05.250 in the in Whether it's your department or your 00:42:05.250 --> 00:42:07.289 crews or different things, it completely changes 00:42:07.289 --> 00:42:11.289 your experience as a fireman. I think it's the 00:42:11.289 --> 00:42:12.869 thing that affects your mental health more than 00:42:12.869 --> 00:42:19.550 anything. It's been almost sad is the best way 00:42:19.550 --> 00:42:22.130 of putting it, I think, to pull the curtain back 00:42:22.130 --> 00:42:24.809 on the profession that I love so much and see. 00:42:25.449 --> 00:42:28.110 in some areas, so much cowardice. And what I 00:42:28.110 --> 00:42:30.349 mean is I'm not talking about you with the leather 00:42:30.349 --> 00:42:32.550 helmet and your mustache beating your chest. 00:42:32.590 --> 00:42:34.829 I've made entry on some, you know, barn burners. 00:42:35.349 --> 00:42:38.690 I'm talking about moral courage. So standing 00:42:38.690 --> 00:42:41.190 up, whether it's fighting to be with your family 00:42:41.190 --> 00:42:43.349 when you should be, rather than rolling over 00:42:43.349 --> 00:42:45.250 and taking mandatory overtime after mandatory 00:42:45.250 --> 00:42:47.710 overtime and not doing anything about it, or 00:42:47.710 --> 00:42:50.389 whether it's pushing back on, you know, needing. 00:42:51.119 --> 00:42:53.820 fitness standards in the fire service and then 00:42:53.820 --> 00:42:56.659 the same with you know the uh rising through 00:42:56.659 --> 00:42:58.900 the ranks or even union leadership like there's 00:42:58.900 --> 00:43:02.679 so many areas that massively affect us that there's 00:43:02.679 --> 00:43:05.400 so much cowardice around and it's been like locally 00:43:05.400 --> 00:43:08.099 here trying to get people to just stand up and 00:43:08.099 --> 00:43:11.480 say you know it's why is this always on our shoulders 00:43:11.480 --> 00:43:14.059 you know you are understaffed it's your lack 00:43:14.059 --> 00:43:16.539 of leadership and we're we're paying the price 00:43:16.539 --> 00:43:18.960 and my my child and my wife or my husband or 00:43:18.960 --> 00:43:21.489 whoever it is They are paying the price when 00:43:21.489 --> 00:43:23.510 you still go home at five o 'clock every day. 00:43:23.789 --> 00:43:26.329 So that's what I struggle with is a moment is 00:43:26.329 --> 00:43:29.030 I see all the tick tocks with these fucking heroes, 00:43:29.150 --> 00:43:30.909 you know, doing a forceful entry prop in their 00:43:30.909 --> 00:43:33.610 shorts and T -shirt or duck walking, spinning 00:43:33.610 --> 00:43:36.170 the hose around, around. But that's not that 00:43:36.170 --> 00:43:37.789 doesn't mean anything. That's just narcissism 00:43:37.789 --> 00:43:40.909 where real heroism in the fire service is actually 00:43:40.909 --> 00:43:43.110 doing the right thing. And that means on scene 00:43:43.110 --> 00:43:45.949 being compassionate, being courageous when you 00:43:45.949 --> 00:43:47.630 need to and make an entry on those dangerous 00:43:47.630 --> 00:43:50.300 situations. But it also carries over to when 00:43:50.300 --> 00:43:52.519 you go back to the station and your working environment. 00:43:52.840 --> 00:43:56.019 So for me, it's a real call for service for the 00:43:56.019 --> 00:43:58.400 right kind of person to be put back in the fire 00:43:58.400 --> 00:44:00.179 service. Because I'm seeing there's a lot of 00:44:00.179 --> 00:44:01.739 wrong kind of people. If you can't even fight 00:44:01.739 --> 00:44:04.380 for your own fucking family, what are you doing 00:44:04.380 --> 00:44:08.880 wearing the badge? Yeah. No, I couldn't agree 00:44:08.880 --> 00:44:12.260 more. And, you know, when I joined the fire service, 00:44:12.599 --> 00:44:17.130 I was... A hundred percent. It was, it became 00:44:17.130 --> 00:44:20.349 my life. It was everything, everything, every 00:44:20.349 --> 00:44:22.690 day off that I spent was going to a conference, 00:44:22.730 --> 00:44:26.329 a training, a class. Um, all I ever wanted to 00:44:26.329 --> 00:44:29.929 do was train every, every crew that I, um, I 00:44:29.929 --> 00:44:31.750 worked with, I'd show up at work and be like, 00:44:31.789 --> 00:44:33.909 so what can we train on today? I drove them crazy. 00:44:34.210 --> 00:44:40.199 Um, I was, I was just obsessed. And, um, It really 00:44:40.199 --> 00:44:42.559 has that, it can have that culture, can have 00:44:42.559 --> 00:44:44.460 that hold on you if you make it your life. And 00:44:44.460 --> 00:44:48.019 one thing that I learned through different difficult 00:44:48.019 --> 00:44:51.900 experiences was how important it truly was to 00:44:51.900 --> 00:44:55.920 have things outside the fire service. Because 00:44:55.920 --> 00:44:59.900 when things start to go wrong and that's all 00:44:59.900 --> 00:45:03.000 you have to depend on, it really can mess with 00:45:03.000 --> 00:45:07.500 your mental health, like truly. But yeah, I mean, 00:45:07.579 --> 00:45:14.860 it is sad. There is a lot of people who are higher 00:45:14.860 --> 00:45:17.320 up that are making a lot of decisions and doing 00:45:17.320 --> 00:45:19.800 things that are definitely making things worse 00:45:19.800 --> 00:45:21.880 for us to just be able to do our job and to do 00:45:21.880 --> 00:45:23.960 it well and to do it efficiently. And not to 00:45:23.960 --> 00:45:25.619 mention, I mean, the fire service is already 00:45:25.619 --> 00:45:28.400 filled with, you know, you have really amazing 00:45:28.400 --> 00:45:31.059 people, but you also have a lot of people who 00:45:31.059 --> 00:45:33.699 are. so judgmental and egotistical and they, 00:45:33.719 --> 00:45:35.340 you know, they're going to assume how you're 00:45:35.340 --> 00:45:37.880 going to be just by looking at you. Like, you 00:45:37.880 --> 00:45:39.840 know, obviously being an instructor and a female 00:45:39.840 --> 00:45:41.559 in the fire service, I've had a lot of people 00:45:41.559 --> 00:45:44.460 judge me for who don't know me, who just assume, 00:45:44.559 --> 00:45:46.719 you know, that I'm not going to be good at my 00:45:46.719 --> 00:45:49.239 job or that I'm not going to train or, or what 00:45:49.239 --> 00:45:50.860 am I doing teaching and who do you think you 00:45:50.860 --> 00:45:53.699 are and all these things. And it's truly like, 00:45:53.780 --> 00:45:56.519 we have this thing where you always say you can 00:45:56.519 --> 00:45:59.380 learn from anyone, but that's not always actually. 00:46:00.690 --> 00:46:03.550 Right. Like people don't truly treat you that 00:46:03.550 --> 00:46:06.949 way. There's, there's so much, you know, issues 00:46:06.949 --> 00:46:09.989 with ego and, and narcissism instead of just 00:46:09.989 --> 00:46:12.070 saying like, are we doing the right thing? Are 00:46:12.070 --> 00:46:15.409 we helping people? Like, you know, if somebody's 00:46:15.409 --> 00:46:17.389 struggling, help them don't judge that. Like, 00:46:17.429 --> 00:46:19.130 you know what I mean? Like, I don't know that 00:46:19.130 --> 00:46:23.010 there's a, there's a big role in having the right 00:46:23.010 --> 00:46:25.170 mentors in the fire service. And there's a lot 00:46:25.170 --> 00:46:26.889 of people who've been put into power that make 00:46:26.889 --> 00:46:29.569 things worse instead of better for sure. So, 00:46:29.569 --> 00:46:34.429 I mean, I couldn't agree more. I had Al Benjamin 00:46:34.429 --> 00:46:38.530 on the show. FDNY Rescue One legend stayed at 00:46:38.530 --> 00:46:40.289 the firefighter rank, which I did as well. I 00:46:40.289 --> 00:46:42.650 mean, I think like Al, he probably got to the 00:46:42.650 --> 00:46:44.090 point where he's like, I don't want to be in 00:46:44.090 --> 00:46:45.889 the front seat. You know, this is too much fun. 00:46:45.949 --> 00:46:49.800 And that's where I was at 14 years. He was so 00:46:49.800 --> 00:46:52.860 humble and he had this whole thing that, you 00:46:52.860 --> 00:46:54.699 know, of course, the new guys don't know what 00:46:54.699 --> 00:46:55.860 they're doing because they haven't been here 00:46:55.860 --> 00:46:58.360 30 years. So, you know, as long as they're willing 00:46:58.360 --> 00:46:59.980 to learn, as long as like you said, you know, 00:47:00.000 --> 00:47:02.619 you're asking to be shown how to do things. He 00:47:02.619 --> 00:47:04.760 was like, this is this is what you do. And yet 00:47:04.760 --> 00:47:07.519 you see with this other kind of person that you're 00:47:07.519 --> 00:47:10.360 talking about that there, you know, snide remarks 00:47:10.360 --> 00:47:12.480 from the lazy boy like, oh, he's fucking you 00:47:12.480 --> 00:47:14.980 guys. Like, well, you know, I grew up on a farm, 00:47:15.039 --> 00:47:17.500 for example. I know how to ride horses and muck 00:47:17.500 --> 00:47:19.719 out stables, but I actually didn't know how to 00:47:19.719 --> 00:47:22.059 take apart a chainsaw and change the chain and 00:47:22.059 --> 00:47:25.179 put it back. I wasn't, you know, felling timber 00:47:25.179 --> 00:47:27.840 on my farm. So people showed me how to do that. 00:47:27.900 --> 00:47:29.559 People showed me how to throw ladders, how to 00:47:29.559 --> 00:47:32.179 pull hoes. That was other people sharing their 00:47:32.179 --> 00:47:35.639 information. And to think that you would then, 00:47:35.719 --> 00:47:40.340 a year, two years in, be irritated by someone 00:47:40.340 --> 00:47:42.420 else wanting to learn, wanting to be shown how 00:47:42.420 --> 00:47:44.260 to do things. I mean, again, you're talking about 00:47:44.260 --> 00:47:47.599 narcissism. That's the ultimate narcissist. Like 00:47:47.599 --> 00:47:51.099 this true, humble veteran firefighter is someone 00:47:51.099 --> 00:47:52.639 that's going to take you under the wing and say, 00:47:52.739 --> 00:47:54.539 let me show you. Now, if you don't get it on 00:47:54.539 --> 00:47:56.119 the third time, I understand the frustration. 00:47:56.280 --> 00:47:59.539 But, you know, initially and I'll always want 00:47:59.539 --> 00:48:01.480 to learn from other people. I've had coaches 00:48:01.480 --> 00:48:03.599 on here that asked me how I train people. I'm 00:48:03.599 --> 00:48:06.840 a white belt weekend warrior coach at best. But 00:48:06.840 --> 00:48:08.860 they're asking me, what do you do when you coach? 00:48:09.300 --> 00:48:11.800 That's the kind of true veteran that we need. 00:48:11.860 --> 00:48:14.679 The journeyman or journeywoman. in a profession 00:48:14.679 --> 00:48:16.980 that's constantly learning and constantly wants 00:48:16.980 --> 00:48:21.519 to teach. Yes, absolutely. I've been very fortunate 00:48:21.519 --> 00:48:24.920 spending so much time at conferences and trainings 00:48:24.920 --> 00:48:27.159 that I've gotten to know a lot of really amazing 00:48:27.159 --> 00:48:30.099 people in the fire service, people that I've 00:48:30.099 --> 00:48:32.079 gotten to work with and teach with and teach 00:48:32.079 --> 00:48:36.119 alongside. And one of them is Captain Morris, 00:48:36.219 --> 00:48:44.289 Robert Morris from FTNY. And he, he, is one of 00:48:44.289 --> 00:48:46.690 like the most amazing men i've worked with in 00:48:46.690 --> 00:48:50.030 the fire service because he he barely says he 00:48:50.030 --> 00:48:53.750 doesn't say much right he observes a lot he um 00:48:53.750 --> 00:48:58.510 but he's over here uh like the king of fourth 00:48:58.510 --> 00:49:01.130 century right and you know we have the rex tool 00:49:01.130 --> 00:49:03.630 named after him and his son uh and it's just 00:49:03.630 --> 00:49:08.400 like I was very fortunate. He got placed in a 00:49:08.400 --> 00:49:11.340 group that I was teaching with at FDIC one year 00:49:11.340 --> 00:49:13.340 and getting to learn and observe from that man 00:49:13.340 --> 00:49:15.820 was amazing. It was actually a very uncomfortable 00:49:15.820 --> 00:49:19.800 position for me. I basically was a lead at FDIC 00:49:19.800 --> 00:49:22.480 and they put him in my group for me to be in 00:49:22.480 --> 00:49:24.920 charge, which was very, not only humbling, but 00:49:24.920 --> 00:49:29.840 a bit overwhelming. But he was probably the most... 00:49:30.699 --> 00:49:33.199 one of the most incredible people I've ever met. 00:49:33.300 --> 00:49:34.920 He was like, whatever you think we should do. 00:49:34.980 --> 00:49:39.179 And he was always supportive. He I had this thing 00:49:39.179 --> 00:49:40.940 where I think when you're an instructor, one 00:49:40.940 --> 00:49:42.960 of the things that happens is you don't get to 00:49:42.960 --> 00:49:45.860 see what everyone else is teaching, which drives 00:49:45.860 --> 00:49:47.719 me crazy. I always want to know, like, what are 00:49:47.719 --> 00:49:50.840 they doing? So when I had my group, I had every 00:49:50.840 --> 00:49:53.300 like before we went to go teach at FDIC, I had 00:49:53.300 --> 00:49:56.000 everybody in my group teach their section to 00:49:56.000 --> 00:49:59.550 each other, like to our group. So, um, it was 00:49:59.550 --> 00:50:01.650 really cool to learn from him and he's just so 00:50:01.650 --> 00:50:06.309 humble and he always, it's just, there's so many, 00:50:06.309 --> 00:50:09.110 there's so many men in the fire or people in 00:50:09.110 --> 00:50:12.650 the fire service that, um, really lead by example 00:50:12.650 --> 00:50:14.550 that always have stayed humble. And that's how 00:50:14.550 --> 00:50:17.329 he was for sure. And, um, just being able to 00:50:17.329 --> 00:50:20.849 work with people who like. Those are true firemen 00:50:20.849 --> 00:50:23.730 to me, the guys that do their job, that are there 00:50:23.730 --> 00:50:25.869 to help, that are ready to learn, that are ready, 00:50:25.949 --> 00:50:28.789 that he, I mean, he's in his, I'm not sure, I 00:50:28.789 --> 00:50:32.199 think. late 70s but he's still doing everything 00:50:32.199 --> 00:50:34.519 and you know he's trying to carry plywood up 00:50:34.519 --> 00:50:36.360 a ladder and he's like I'm all like oh do you 00:50:36.360 --> 00:50:38.420 need some help and he's like why don't you go 00:50:38.420 --> 00:50:41.719 check on some other thing you know he just he 00:50:41.719 --> 00:50:45.260 wouldn't let me help but it's just like he's 00:50:45.260 --> 00:50:47.460 he's the kind that leads by example and there's 00:50:47.460 --> 00:50:49.460 still a lot of really great firemen that are 00:50:49.460 --> 00:50:52.260 out there but yes there is there's like this 00:50:52.260 --> 00:50:55.440 ego that's taken over that really is is is such 00:50:55.440 --> 00:50:58.219 a different viewpoint of of like what you originally 00:50:58.219 --> 00:51:00.320 thought when you get into the fire service, right? 00:51:00.440 --> 00:51:02.599 You, you know, you're, you want to leave the 00:51:02.599 --> 00:51:04.239 job better than you found it. You want to have 00:51:04.239 --> 00:51:06.440 respect for the, for the badge, for the uniform, 00:51:06.599 --> 00:51:08.440 for the job, for the citizens, you're doing it 00:51:08.440 --> 00:51:11.199 for them. And a lot of the other things get in 00:51:11.199 --> 00:51:13.440 the way of all of that. And it's, and it's usually 00:51:13.440 --> 00:51:17.460 egos and attitudes and things where people are 00:51:17.460 --> 00:51:20.960 trying to portray a certain, a certain thing, 00:51:21.019 --> 00:51:22.840 but that's, that's not what's coming out. Right. 00:51:22.940 --> 00:51:27.909 So it's just, yeah. It's an important conversation. 00:51:28.090 --> 00:51:32.730 Like I said, it irks me, the social media, Insta 00:51:32.730 --> 00:51:34.590 heroes that put themselves out there. There's 00:51:34.590 --> 00:51:37.050 a difference between sharing a different technique, 00:51:37.230 --> 00:51:39.750 but you know who those sites are. We know who 00:51:39.750 --> 00:51:41.809 those people are. They themselves are humble, 00:51:41.929 --> 00:51:44.329 but there's this thing that if you just buy a 00:51:44.329 --> 00:51:46.630 leather helmet, grow a mustache, and then film 00:51:46.630 --> 00:51:49.449 yourself, like I said, on a door prop or duck 00:51:49.449 --> 00:51:51.409 walking, that all of a sudden everyone's going 00:51:51.409 --> 00:51:53.309 to go, yeah, you're the most courageous firefighter 00:51:53.309 --> 00:51:55.489 I've ever known. Rather than just getting on 00:51:55.489 --> 00:51:58.429 with your fucking job and learning for a while 00:51:58.429 --> 00:52:01.030 and attending the conferences and fighting for 00:52:01.030 --> 00:52:03.570 time off and fitness standards and mental health 00:52:03.570 --> 00:52:05.869 and all the things that will make you a better 00:52:05.869 --> 00:52:08.210 firefighter. But, you know, I get pushed back 00:52:08.210 --> 00:52:11.849 on the 42 -hour work week. Like, oh, the 48 -9. 00:52:11.849 --> 00:52:14.809 Like, listen to what you are saying. You're saying 00:52:14.809 --> 00:52:16.710 that you would rather be away from your family 00:52:16.710 --> 00:52:19.449 longer and perform worse because sleep deprivation 00:52:19.449 --> 00:52:21.989 is making you a shittier firefighter and paramedic. 00:52:22.689 --> 00:52:24.690 than actually have the guts to stand up and say, 00:52:24.750 --> 00:52:25.949 you know what, the way you've been doing it is 00:52:25.949 --> 00:52:28.869 wrong. That's real courage. I want to be home 00:52:28.869 --> 00:52:30.550 and watch my kids. I don't want to miss that 00:52:30.550 --> 00:52:33.289 ballet recital or, you know, those first steps 00:52:33.289 --> 00:52:36.050 or whatever it is. My family is even more important 00:52:36.050 --> 00:52:37.889 than the fire service and I adore the fire service, 00:52:37.949 --> 00:52:39.969 but they always came first, which is why I work 00:52:39.969 --> 00:52:41.889 for four departments. That was always behind 00:52:41.889 --> 00:52:44.809 it. So, you know, it's just, it's a call to action. 00:52:44.869 --> 00:52:47.670 It's a call for real courage because we, Newsflash, 00:52:47.670 --> 00:52:49.710 we're not getting the fires that, you know, our 00:52:49.710 --> 00:52:52.949 forefathers did. We're just not. So I think the 00:52:52.949 --> 00:52:55.110 fragile egos are trying to masquerade like, oh, 00:52:55.130 --> 00:52:56.750 but look at me on the fire ground. Like, yeah, 00:52:56.889 --> 00:53:00.570 go train. But, you know, the fact that you, you 00:53:00.570 --> 00:53:02.650 know, are doing those back to bed calls and showing 00:53:02.650 --> 00:53:04.889 compassion and empathy, that's equally, if not 00:53:04.889 --> 00:53:07.550 more important than making entry and putting 00:53:07.550 --> 00:53:10.690 out a kitchen fire. So embrace the whole position. 00:53:10.869 --> 00:53:13.030 Don't let your ego try and project that it's 00:53:13.030 --> 00:53:16.769 only the fire part that's important. Right. Well, 00:53:16.869 --> 00:53:21.460 I mean. Yeah, there's so many things that, you 00:53:21.460 --> 00:53:24.699 know, what's funny is a lot of people are like, 00:53:24.739 --> 00:53:26.380 oh, you're pre -med. How did you become a fireman? 00:53:26.699 --> 00:53:29.840 And I got to say, being a fireman is probably 00:53:29.840 --> 00:53:32.019 one of the most difficult jobs there is because 00:53:32.019 --> 00:53:35.219 there's so many things you have to know. And 00:53:35.219 --> 00:53:39.039 it's, you know, obviously your firefighting skills, 00:53:39.159 --> 00:53:42.699 but you have you have to. understand and know 00:53:42.699 --> 00:53:46.780 uh vehicles uh cars so you know how to dismantle 00:53:46.780 --> 00:53:48.780 them and break them apart right you have you 00:53:48.780 --> 00:53:50.420 have to know building construction you have to 00:53:50.420 --> 00:53:53.539 understand i'm on the um special operations team 00:53:53.539 --> 00:53:56.199 and we also do hazmat so that's you know all 00:53:56.199 --> 00:53:59.199 those specialties trt and hazmat is just overwhelming 00:53:59.199 --> 00:54:01.360 to the amount of knowledge you need to know it's 00:54:01.360 --> 00:54:02.840 like you really have to know a little bit about 00:54:02.840 --> 00:54:05.000 everything and obviously in florida we run like 00:54:05.000 --> 00:54:08.000 90 medical calls so i'm a paramedic as well and 00:54:08.000 --> 00:54:11.179 you're wearing all these hats and trying to manage 00:54:11.179 --> 00:54:14.420 it all. And truly like the sleep deprivation 00:54:14.420 --> 00:54:19.119 is so massively important because your brain 00:54:19.119 --> 00:54:21.619 can't function properly when it's inflamed all 00:54:21.619 --> 00:54:23.039 the time and you're not getting enough sleep 00:54:23.039 --> 00:54:25.360 and you're stuck in a cortisol cycle, right? 00:54:25.460 --> 00:54:28.119 So if you aren't able to dump that cortisol and 00:54:28.119 --> 00:54:30.440 you're not able to get into your parasympathetic 00:54:30.440 --> 00:54:33.690 type rest and relaxation. you're not going to 00:54:33.690 --> 00:54:36.190 be able to perform. So they want more out of 00:54:36.190 --> 00:54:38.670 you for more hours. But at the same time, if 00:54:38.670 --> 00:54:41.050 you don't actually take care of yourself and 00:54:41.050 --> 00:54:44.409 are able to get to sleep and able to decompress 00:54:44.409 --> 00:54:47.570 and spend time with your family and remove, like 00:54:47.570 --> 00:54:50.389 reduce your cortisol levels, you're not going 00:54:50.389 --> 00:54:52.130 to be good at your job anyway. Your cognition 00:54:52.130 --> 00:54:54.170 is going to go down. Your memory decreases. You're 00:54:54.170 --> 00:54:56.289 more irritable. I mean, I worked a couple of 00:54:56.289 --> 00:54:58.849 48s in the past two weeks and I got to tell you, 00:54:58.869 --> 00:55:01.750 I wasn't in my... At my best, my last shift, 00:55:01.969 --> 00:55:06.329 my officer said something to me. And, you know, 00:55:06.349 --> 00:55:09.230 it was true. I was tired. Luckily, I have an 00:55:09.230 --> 00:55:12.840 excellent officer now. His name is AJ Young. 00:55:12.920 --> 00:55:16.280 He's amazing. And I really absolutely love him. 00:55:16.320 --> 00:55:18.699 I'm very fortunate to have an officer who really 00:55:18.699 --> 00:55:21.539 cares, who trains, who's doing things for the 00:55:21.539 --> 00:55:23.139 right reason, who cares about our family life. 00:55:23.280 --> 00:55:26.179 So, you know, there are still those guys out 00:55:26.179 --> 00:55:28.000 there. And I'm very, you know, I love my crew. 00:55:28.059 --> 00:55:31.900 I'm very happy with my officer. But yeah, I mean, 00:55:32.000 --> 00:55:38.000 it's so imperative. It's such a cliche, right? 00:55:38.039 --> 00:55:39.619 You have to love yourself before you can love 00:55:39.619 --> 00:55:41.579 someone else. But truly, you have to take care 00:55:41.579 --> 00:55:43.219 of yourself before you can take care of other 00:55:43.219 --> 00:55:45.239 people. And that's super important in the fire 00:55:45.239 --> 00:55:49.699 service. I got to a point where I got burnt out 00:55:49.699 --> 00:55:53.820 very early. I started teaching very early on 00:55:53.820 --> 00:55:57.699 in my career, which caused a lot of strife in 00:55:57.699 --> 00:56:00.760 my life. I started teaching with only two years 00:56:00.760 --> 00:56:02.519 on in the fire service, which I got a lot of 00:56:02.519 --> 00:56:04.760 judgments for. And there's like a whole story 00:56:04.760 --> 00:56:08.440 behind how I got. asked to teach how i decided 00:56:08.440 --> 00:56:11.619 to go ahead and help out with all that but you 00:56:11.619 --> 00:56:16.820 know i um i was you know taking all these classes 00:56:16.820 --> 00:56:18.980 and conferences i was teaching i joined the combat 00:56:18.980 --> 00:56:21.820 challenge team um i was teaching the cadets i 00:56:21.820 --> 00:56:23.860 ended up teaching fire academy and emt and medical 00:56:23.860 --> 00:56:26.699 school i was having or medic school i was you 00:56:26.699 --> 00:56:29.780 know i have i've had like three jobs while working 00:56:30.440 --> 00:56:32.960 you know, extra 48s to get off for conferences 00:56:32.960 --> 00:56:35.400 or trainings or classes on top of the actual 00:56:35.400 --> 00:56:38.039 running the calls and having difficulty social 00:56:38.039 --> 00:56:40.760 life. And I got burnt out. It got to the point 00:56:40.760 --> 00:56:44.079 where I actually had hives for a week from stress. 00:56:44.559 --> 00:56:48.340 And I was transported. We didn't know what was 00:56:48.340 --> 00:56:50.280 going on. I thought I was just having an allergic 00:56:50.280 --> 00:56:52.280 reaction. All of a sudden I had hives everywhere. 00:56:52.480 --> 00:56:54.800 I called, I live right next to a firehouse. I 00:56:54.800 --> 00:56:58.840 called the guys and The officer there was like, 00:56:58.920 --> 00:57:01.380 Jenny, you need to go. You need to get checked 00:57:01.380 --> 00:57:03.800 out. He's like, you're getting more hives as 00:57:03.800 --> 00:57:07.760 you're here. And I was on, you know, steroids 00:57:07.760 --> 00:57:10.800 and antihistamines and all these things for a 00:57:10.800 --> 00:57:13.960 week and nothing happened. Nothing helped. And 00:57:13.960 --> 00:57:17.179 they would just come every single day. And my 00:57:17.179 --> 00:57:20.340 friend, one of my best friends, Cassandra, came 00:57:20.340 --> 00:57:22.349 over and she's like. you know, I think we need 00:57:22.349 --> 00:57:24.869 to do some yoga. I'm like, okay. So, and then, 00:57:24.889 --> 00:57:26.829 so we did some yoga. She's like, maybe we need 00:57:26.829 --> 00:57:28.630 to have a mimosa and cry about our lives for 00:57:28.630 --> 00:57:30.329 a moment. I'm like, okay. So we did that. And 00:57:30.329 --> 00:57:31.949 we actually cried about our lives in my carport. 00:57:32.230 --> 00:57:33.730 And she's like, you know what? I think it's going 00:57:33.730 --> 00:57:35.510 to fix your hives. I'm like, tell me. She's like, 00:57:35.550 --> 00:57:37.190 I think we just need to do something really, 00:57:37.230 --> 00:57:40.269 really random and fun. And I said, okay, name 00:57:40.269 --> 00:57:42.829 it. I'm down. I'll do whatever it is. She's like, 00:57:42.829 --> 00:57:44.769 I think we should go rent jet skis, but I want 00:57:44.769 --> 00:57:47.449 my own jet ski. I was like, yeah, you don't want 00:57:47.449 --> 00:57:49.590 to write tandem jet skis. But anyway, so within 00:57:49.590 --> 00:57:54.289 an hour we were on jet skis. Um, I let that thing 00:57:54.289 --> 00:57:57.949 go full throttle and we just went for it. And, 00:57:57.949 --> 00:58:02.510 uh, I did not get hides again. It was, it's just, 00:58:02.530 --> 00:58:06.710 if you're not giving yourself that time to relax 00:58:06.710 --> 00:58:09.050 and finding your joy and finding your happiness 00:58:09.050 --> 00:58:12.469 and doing things for yourself, you're not going 00:58:12.469 --> 00:58:14.329 to be able to serve anybody else in including 00:58:14.329 --> 00:58:16.570 the community or the fire service. It's, it's 00:58:16.570 --> 00:58:20.320 so important. Um, and I'm all for like, you know, 00:58:20.360 --> 00:58:22.480 we do things for them and, and our health is 00:58:22.480 --> 00:58:24.599 important, but our job is to focus and to search 00:58:24.599 --> 00:58:28.639 and to, you know, like to go in on, um, on the 00:58:28.639 --> 00:58:30.360 searches that, you know, if there's a chance 00:58:30.360 --> 00:58:33.360 of life, you, you, I'm, you take those risks, 00:58:33.400 --> 00:58:35.760 but that doesn't take away the fact that you 00:58:35.760 --> 00:58:38.980 need to take care of yourself, you know, in between 00:58:38.980 --> 00:58:40.739 all those times where you're choosing to risk 00:58:40.739 --> 00:58:43.219 your life for this job, right? Like your life 00:58:43.219 --> 00:58:46.000 is still important. It still matters to, to go 00:58:46.000 --> 00:58:49.130 ahead and, and. you know, make sure you're in 00:58:49.130 --> 00:58:51.010 the right state of mind to be able to help everyone, 00:58:51.130 --> 00:58:56.050 right? I said this in the couple of times I've 00:58:56.050 --> 00:58:59.349 done talks recently. You know, firstly, if you 00:58:59.349 --> 00:59:01.510 were, you know, a football fan, baseball fan, 00:59:01.630 --> 00:59:04.010 whatever, and your favorite players only slept 00:59:04.010 --> 00:59:07.210 four days a week, how would that impact their 00:59:07.210 --> 00:59:09.590 game? And they just play a game. They throw a 00:59:09.590 --> 00:59:11.889 ball. They catch it. They put it in a hole, whatever 00:59:11.889 --> 00:59:16.440 the game is. But it's a game. Now take us. You 00:59:16.440 --> 00:59:18.119 know, you are in a dead sleep. You know, you've 00:59:18.119 --> 00:59:19.820 been running most of the night now. It's three 00:59:19.820 --> 00:59:22.460 in the morning. You get woken up, jump out of 00:59:22.460 --> 00:59:24.480 bed, throw clothes on, slide down the two -story 00:59:24.480 --> 00:59:26.139 pole, get in the back of a tiller truck. I'm 00:59:26.139 --> 00:59:29.500 using my favorite department in California. You 00:59:29.500 --> 00:59:32.039 know, navigate to a fire, get off, you know, 00:59:32.039 --> 00:59:34.480 throw a ladder, make entry to a second -story 00:59:34.480 --> 00:59:37.679 window, you know, do a primary search, find a 00:59:37.679 --> 00:59:40.219 child, find the window again, pull the child 00:59:40.219 --> 00:59:42.539 back down the ladder. Now you're on the front 00:59:42.539 --> 00:59:45.300 yard. There's a train right down your first due. 00:59:45.380 --> 00:59:47.420 So now the ambulance is held up with a rescue. 00:59:47.579 --> 00:59:49.559 So now you're doffing your gear and you're starting 00:59:49.559 --> 00:59:51.900 a pediatric cardiac arrest algorithm in your 00:59:51.900 --> 00:59:54.320 mind and trying to figure out drug doses. And 00:59:54.320 --> 00:59:58.119 those people work 56 hours a week and 80 hours 00:59:58.119 --> 01:00:00.659 if you get mandatory. But the person who bags 01:00:00.659 --> 01:00:03.139 your groceries, and again, this is not demeaning 01:00:03.139 --> 01:00:05.860 to them, but a not life -threatening job or makes 01:00:05.860 --> 01:00:08.380 you coffee or whatever it is, at 40 hours, they 01:00:08.380 --> 01:00:10.840 tap out. And that's because they know that's 01:00:10.840 --> 01:00:13.480 a healthy thing for a regular person. And you 01:00:13.480 --> 01:00:17.280 put those two side by side and not a single person 01:00:17.280 --> 01:00:19.559 has been explained to me anything that makes 01:00:19.559 --> 01:00:21.739 sense as far as why, other than, well, we've 01:00:21.739 --> 01:00:23.880 always done it that way. So when you put it in 01:00:23.880 --> 01:00:25.820 those terms and you're talking about performance 01:00:25.820 --> 01:00:27.420 and you've got these chess beaters saying they're 01:00:27.420 --> 01:00:29.480 the greatest firefighter on the planet and you're 01:00:29.480 --> 01:00:31.619 not even fighting for a work week that allows 01:00:31.619 --> 01:00:34.079 you to perform at the highest level, you're a 01:00:34.079 --> 01:00:37.389 liar. You're a damn liar. You're a peacock. Because 01:00:37.389 --> 01:00:39.829 you want to film yourself on the fire ground 01:00:39.829 --> 01:00:43.230 throwing a ladder, but you're rolling over when 01:00:43.230 --> 01:00:45.449 they tell you you got work mandatory and now 01:00:45.449 --> 01:00:47.550 you're doing two civilian work weeks in a week. 01:00:47.630 --> 01:00:50.449 And your performance is dog shit. And it is. 01:00:50.449 --> 01:00:52.309 It's science. It's absolute science. So this 01:00:52.309 --> 01:00:54.510 is, again, why there needs to be a pushback. 01:00:54.610 --> 01:00:56.690 If you're looking at performing at the highest 01:00:56.690 --> 01:00:59.050 level in the EMS side, the technical rescue side, 01:00:59.150 --> 01:01:01.789 the fire side, you should be demanding the same 01:01:01.789 --> 01:01:03.570 kind of environment that our special operators 01:01:03.570 --> 01:01:07.349 get, that our sports people get. But in the fire 01:01:07.349 --> 01:01:09.969 service, we just take scraps and then we just 01:01:09.969 --> 01:01:12.269 say, oh, yeah, well, you know, chest, you know, 01:01:12.269 --> 01:01:14.510 beach, excuse me, chest beating again. Like, 01:01:14.570 --> 01:01:16.849 well, you know, this job isn't for everyone. 01:01:16.909 --> 01:01:18.190 I'll sleep when I'm dead. And it's like, no, 01:01:18.269 --> 01:01:19.750 that's bullshit. You know, you're just telling 01:01:19.750 --> 01:01:21.849 yourself a fairy tale. If you truly take this 01:01:21.849 --> 01:01:24.650 job seriously, you, as you said, will train at 01:01:24.650 --> 01:01:26.650 the highest level, but you will also demand the 01:01:26.650 --> 01:01:28.769 rest and recovery that will allow you to perform 01:01:28.769 --> 01:01:33.170 at the highest level. Absolutely. I mean, I think 01:01:33.170 --> 01:01:37.599 that's. obviously super important um you know 01:01:37.599 --> 01:01:41.440 we we really in order to do this job well you 01:01:41.440 --> 01:01:44.800 need to be well you need to be well right your 01:01:44.800 --> 01:01:46.760 body needs to be well your mind needs to be well 01:01:46.760 --> 01:01:51.239 and so we already have besides lack of sleep 01:01:51.239 --> 01:01:54.349 we already have so many things that are affecting 01:01:54.349 --> 01:01:57.809 us right we're already in our sympathetic state 01:01:57.809 --> 01:01:59.829 most of the time because of the calls because 01:01:59.829 --> 01:02:03.030 of constantly having to be ready um the tones 01:02:03.030 --> 01:02:07.510 going off where we're um you're you're basically 01:02:07.510 --> 01:02:10.769 always living with with your cup all the way 01:02:10.769 --> 01:02:13.789 full which is why when things go wrong in your 01:02:13.789 --> 01:02:16.130 family life or something else like all of a sudden 01:02:16.130 --> 01:02:19.349 the pieces are crumbling right and sleep deprivation 01:02:19.349 --> 01:02:22.030 i i couldn't agree more i mean if you want to 01:02:22.030 --> 01:02:24.559 fight to do be the best at this job. We need 01:02:24.559 --> 01:02:27.019 to be fighting to be able to get enough sleep 01:02:27.019 --> 01:02:29.480 to do our jobs properly, to be functioning at 01:02:29.480 --> 01:02:32.219 our highest level. Because we are making life 01:02:32.219 --> 01:02:36.360 choices, like life decisions for people on a 01:02:36.360 --> 01:02:39.860 constant basis on a couple hours of sleep. And 01:02:39.860 --> 01:02:41.599 if we're not catching up and we're not thinking 01:02:41.599 --> 01:02:43.800 clearly, we could, you know, that's how human 01:02:43.800 --> 01:02:46.960 error is a real thing. So, I mean, we have human 01:02:46.960 --> 01:02:49.800 error in science and we have human error in our 01:02:49.800 --> 01:02:52.449 daily lives whenever you're... you know, in, 01:02:52.570 --> 01:02:56.809 in the medical field. So it's just, yeah, I, 01:02:56.849 --> 01:02:59.409 I a hundred percent agree. If you, if you are 01:02:59.409 --> 01:03:01.210 fighting to do this job properly, you should 01:03:01.210 --> 01:03:04.929 be fighting to do it in a, in a healthy way. 01:03:05.050 --> 01:03:07.190 Not just, not just training, which is important, 01:03:07.309 --> 01:03:09.090 not just training and fitness, but being able 01:03:09.090 --> 01:03:11.389 to fight for getting enough sleep so you can 01:03:11.389 --> 01:03:14.889 function properly. A hundred percent. People, 01:03:14.969 --> 01:03:17.690 you know, for so long now said, I need to see 01:03:17.690 --> 01:03:20.449 the data. on why a 56 hour work week is worse 01:03:20.449 --> 01:03:23.289 than a 42. And again, I face palm and, you know, 01:03:23.329 --> 01:03:25.230 the most aggressive of ways. And I, you really 01:03:25.230 --> 01:03:28.030 need to study to show that, but okay, I'll bite 01:03:28.030 --> 01:03:30.590 for a second. Let's flip it around. I can give 01:03:30.590 --> 01:03:33.730 you a 50, you know, 50 year longitudinal study 01:03:33.730 --> 01:03:35.949 on how not to do it because our graveyards are 01:03:35.949 --> 01:03:39.289 full of firefighters. So there's your data. We 01:03:39.289 --> 01:03:41.170 know about the cancer and the heart disease and 01:03:41.170 --> 01:03:44.760 the suicides and, you know, the, um, the failed 01:03:44.760 --> 01:03:47.519 pregnancies and all these other things, the alcoholism 01:03:47.519 --> 01:03:50.619 and the opioid overdoses. I mean, it's there. 01:03:50.739 --> 01:03:53.219 It's rampant. And also, if you want to take the 01:03:53.219 --> 01:03:55.599 acuity side, how many of our line of duty deaths 01:03:55.599 --> 01:03:58.119 that weren't from chronic disease are also attributed 01:03:58.119 --> 01:04:00.940 to sleep deprivation? The tankers that roll over, 01:04:01.059 --> 01:04:03.000 the intersection wrecks, falling off an aerial, 01:04:03.099 --> 01:04:05.420 getting lost in a primary. How many of those 01:04:05.420 --> 01:04:08.239 could have been avoided if those responders were 01:04:08.239 --> 01:04:14.840 actually well slept? Right. I mean, yeah. I couldn't 01:04:14.840 --> 01:04:16.500 agree more with everything that you're doing 01:04:16.500 --> 01:04:18.340 and everything you're fighting for. I know about 01:04:18.340 --> 01:04:21.480 trying to show people the importance of it. I 01:04:21.480 --> 01:04:24.440 mean, you're not going to be functioning at your 01:04:24.440 --> 01:04:32.400 best no matter what. I definitely think that 01:04:32.400 --> 01:04:35.000 when you're trying to make these quick decisions, 01:04:35.460 --> 01:04:40.519 you already know this. If you haven't slept and 01:04:40.519 --> 01:04:42.840 you're trying to do anything, During the day, 01:04:42.840 --> 01:04:45.599 trying to cook, trying to clean normal tasks, 01:04:45.739 --> 01:04:48.659 it already becomes far more difficult, right? 01:04:48.820 --> 01:04:51.739 Like you can't, you make simple mistakes. So 01:04:51.739 --> 01:04:54.239 a hundred percent putting your life on like other 01:04:54.239 --> 01:04:55.940 people's life on the line while you're sleep 01:04:55.940 --> 01:04:59.219 deprived is it's not a badge of honor. It's, 01:04:59.219 --> 01:05:03.320 it's, uh, you know, it's a, it's a detriment, 01:05:03.400 --> 01:05:08.579 right? So, um, yeah, I mean, we, there's already 01:05:08.579 --> 01:05:13.670 so many things, um, that come along with this, 01:05:13.690 --> 01:05:16.510 this, this job is really, I always say it's a 01:05:16.510 --> 01:05:20.010 lifestyle. It's not, it's not a job because it's 01:05:20.010 --> 01:05:22.409 for, you know, we are still, my department is 01:05:22.409 --> 01:05:26.010 still 24 48. So every three days this is where 01:05:26.010 --> 01:05:28.889 a third of my life is at the, at the firehouse 01:05:28.889 --> 01:05:33.170 running calls and eating, eating with the, with 01:05:33.170 --> 01:05:36.809 the guys eat, like spending time living that 01:05:36.809 --> 01:05:42.019 lifestyle, like whatever's going on. your your 01:05:42.019 --> 01:05:44.039 home life your sleep all of that is going to 01:05:44.039 --> 01:05:46.840 affect it and and there's already so many things 01:05:46.840 --> 01:05:50.199 besides sleep deprivation that are already you 01:05:50.199 --> 01:05:52.420 know causing health issues and mental health 01:05:52.420 --> 01:05:54.960 issues you know whether it's physical or mental 01:05:54.960 --> 01:05:58.380 which both equate to overall health right so 01:05:58.380 --> 01:06:03.300 yeah i mean it's it's truly sad like it you know 01:06:03.300 --> 01:06:06.539 it's not it's something that 100 needs to be 01:06:07.159 --> 01:06:09.559 Spent a lot more time. I think, I think it's 01:06:09.559 --> 01:06:12.260 slowly coming around, but yeah, obviously there's 01:06:12.260 --> 01:06:15.280 a lot of resistance because it might not, it 01:06:15.280 --> 01:06:18.619 might not work out financially to have that schedule. 01:06:18.679 --> 01:06:20.360 Cause now we have to hire a whole nother shift, 01:06:20.500 --> 01:06:27.380 you know, and you know, it's, it's, it's something 01:06:27.380 --> 01:06:29.820 that's difficult to convince, but the science 01:06:29.820 --> 01:06:32.300 is obviously there. I mean, you don't even need 01:06:32.300 --> 01:06:35.920 to. To have these specific shift studies to prove 01:06:35.920 --> 01:06:37.840 the science of lack of sleep. There's lots of 01:06:37.840 --> 01:06:40.940 lack of sleep studies that prove how it affects 01:06:40.940 --> 01:06:42.820 your cognition, your inflammation, your heart 01:06:42.820 --> 01:06:46.460 disease risk, your cancer risk. So, I mean, I 01:06:46.460 --> 01:06:49.059 couldn't agree more with what you've been fighting 01:06:49.059 --> 01:06:52.480 for, for sure. Well, what's weird as well, not 01:06:52.480 --> 01:06:55.380 weird, but I guess frustrating too is, you know, 01:06:55.420 --> 01:06:59.360 you get these air quotes financial gurus in cities 01:06:59.360 --> 01:07:03.699 and counties and just asking, Because a lot of 01:07:03.699 --> 01:07:05.340 departments are coming to me now saying, how 01:07:05.340 --> 01:07:07.219 do we get this started? Again, I'm not the expert. 01:07:07.340 --> 01:07:09.139 I send them to all these departments that have 01:07:09.139 --> 01:07:11.019 done it. I can certainly talk about the principles 01:07:11.019 --> 01:07:13.219 and all those things, but how do you actually 01:07:13.219 --> 01:07:15.800 put it in practice? That's Pascoe, Gainesville, 01:07:15.840 --> 01:07:17.139 all these departments that have done it already. 01:07:17.199 --> 01:07:20.639 They're the experts. But basically, if you look 01:07:20.639 --> 01:07:22.679 at the money you're wasting on overtime, because 01:07:22.679 --> 01:07:25.159 no one wants to work for you, and the money that 01:07:25.159 --> 01:07:27.159 you spend on training a new recruit who then 01:07:27.159 --> 01:07:29.480 leaves your department two or three years later, 01:07:29.639 --> 01:07:31.579 and the money you're spending on workman's comp. 01:07:31.949 --> 01:07:34.829 and line of duty death payments and medical retirements 01:07:34.829 --> 01:07:37.510 and lawsuits from mistakes that we make, there 01:07:37.510 --> 01:07:41.150 are tens of millions of dollars downstream. So 01:07:41.150 --> 01:07:43.530 it's not even more money. Yes, this fiscal year 01:07:43.530 --> 01:07:45.550 you will need a little bit more, but then you're 01:07:45.550 --> 01:07:47.590 going to save money hand over fist downstream. 01:07:48.630 --> 01:07:52.309 And it could just save lives of firemen in general. 01:07:52.369 --> 01:07:55.110 That doesn't matter because clearly if that was 01:07:55.110 --> 01:07:56.869 the problem, if that was actually something that 01:07:56.869 --> 01:07:58.210 moved people, we would have fixed this years 01:07:58.210 --> 01:08:02.289 ago. Right. So that isn't enough to move people. 01:08:02.389 --> 01:08:04.070 It's enough for me to leave the fire service, 01:08:04.090 --> 01:08:06.469 give up my pension and start a podcast. But it 01:08:06.469 --> 01:08:08.909 wasn't enough for a city or county council member 01:08:08.909 --> 01:08:11.449 to actually fight for their own people as they're 01:08:11.449 --> 01:08:14.789 burying them annually. So it's the dollars and 01:08:14.789 --> 01:08:17.909 cents that talks. But if you look at Pasco and 01:08:17.909 --> 01:08:21.050 Gainesville, they showed, look, with tens of 01:08:21.050 --> 01:08:24.729 millions we're losing for nothing and we're destroying 01:08:24.729 --> 01:08:27.210 our firefighters in the process. And then the 01:08:27.210 --> 01:08:28.729 moment they make the switch and they tell the 01:08:28.729 --> 01:08:30.489 world, hey, we're going to be going to this shift, 01:08:30.770 --> 01:08:34.409 they have lines around their buildings for recruits 01:08:34.409 --> 01:08:36.550 wanting to work for them. And then lo and behold, 01:08:36.789 --> 01:08:39.189 those vacancies are filled. And it's still overtime. 01:08:39.569 --> 01:08:42.329 There's day duties and other things, but it's 01:08:42.329 --> 01:08:45.109 infrequent. So now these people are forced to 01:08:45.109 --> 01:08:47.409 rest, maybe even start an entrepreneurial project 01:08:47.409 --> 01:08:49.710 on the side, which is very healthy as long as 01:08:49.710 --> 01:08:51.970 you sleep at night. And now, as you said, you've 01:08:51.970 --> 01:08:54.890 torn that identity from being all in as a firefighter. 01:08:55.399 --> 01:08:57.659 It's something that I do and I love, but I'm 01:08:57.659 --> 01:09:01.520 also a surfer and a yoga student and all these 01:09:01.520 --> 01:09:03.760 other things. And now I've started this health 01:09:03.760 --> 01:09:06.039 business or whatever it is on the side. Now you've 01:09:06.039 --> 01:09:09.239 got another entire identity, entire tribe. So 01:09:09.239 --> 01:09:12.079 no matter how you look at it, the answers are 01:09:12.079 --> 01:09:14.020 there. And there's a Desmond Tutu quote that 01:09:14.020 --> 01:09:17.359 I absolutely adore, which sums us up perfectly. 01:09:17.439 --> 01:09:20.989 It says, we we're so busy pulling people out 01:09:20.989 --> 01:09:23.529 of the river we forget to go upstream and find 01:09:23.529 --> 01:09:25.170 out why they're falling in in the first place 01:09:25.170 --> 01:09:28.729 that's it that's all we're asking you to do take 01:09:28.729 --> 01:09:31.989 that money and put it in the front yeah i think 01:09:31.989 --> 01:09:35.670 it's absolutely important um you know i we can 01:09:35.670 --> 01:09:39.050 only hope that people will start people who can 01:09:39.050 --> 01:09:41.630 make these decisions will start you know spending 01:09:41.630 --> 01:09:44.989 more time really diving into it and understanding 01:09:44.989 --> 01:09:47.590 the the purpose behind it and the importance 01:09:47.590 --> 01:09:51.109 so yeah 100 absolutely well the other good thing 01:09:51.109 --> 01:09:53.189 is that you know as departments go to it it's 01:09:53.189 --> 01:09:55.210 going to force others to as well because otherwise 01:09:55.210 --> 01:09:57.090 they're not going to hire anyone because no one's 01:09:57.090 --> 01:09:59.489 going to want to go to you 100 agree with that 01:09:59.489 --> 01:10:03.750 even the revolution Yes, they're going to have 01:10:03.750 --> 01:10:07.449 no choice. All right, well, I'll get off my soapbox. 01:10:07.470 --> 01:10:09.210 I get on there a lot. I apologize, but I think 01:10:09.210 --> 01:10:11.130 it's just important to reiterate this because 01:10:11.130 --> 01:10:13.170 we're talking about performance and health. This 01:10:13.170 --> 01:10:15.510 is just one of what I call the herd of elephants 01:10:15.510 --> 01:10:18.789 in the room. Going back to your journey, though, 01:10:18.869 --> 01:10:21.689 we left you in Panama. Before we even talk about 01:10:21.689 --> 01:10:24.069 what was next, talk to me about Panama because 01:10:24.069 --> 01:10:26.649 there's so many countries that do so many things 01:10:26.649 --> 01:10:29.840 well. you know, that I think other people need 01:10:29.840 --> 01:10:32.319 to hear about. So what were the things that you 01:10:32.319 --> 01:10:34.439 loved about Panama? And then also, you know, 01:10:34.439 --> 01:10:36.920 were there any things that, that, that country, 01:10:36.920 --> 01:10:38.939 you know, maybe could learn from the U S or somewhere 01:10:38.939 --> 01:10:43.279 else? Oh, I mean, learning to enjoy life and 01:10:43.279 --> 01:10:46.159 slow down. I mean, that's pretty much all of 01:10:46.159 --> 01:10:53.840 Central America. But yeah, I, I, I finished my 01:10:53.840 --> 01:10:57.479 master's degree, and I actually got married and 01:10:57.479 --> 01:11:00.319 took off to Panama. I had already been planning 01:11:00.319 --> 01:11:02.340 it, and then I started dating somebody. We ended 01:11:02.340 --> 01:11:04.680 up getting married. We called it our honeymoon. 01:11:04.920 --> 01:11:10.890 But basically, I was already going. But I lived 01:11:10.890 --> 01:11:14.210 in Bocas del Toro, which is a little island on 01:11:14.210 --> 01:11:17.470 the Caribbean side. So I didn't spend a lot of 01:11:17.470 --> 01:11:19.430 time in the whole rest of the country. I mainly 01:11:19.430 --> 01:11:24.189 stayed on this group of islands here. I lived 01:11:24.189 --> 01:11:29.310 on one of the islands that had no vehicles. I 01:11:29.310 --> 01:11:32.329 lived in basically a cabin that collected rainwater 01:11:32.329 --> 01:11:37.739 and, you know, had like... propane for the stove 01:11:37.739 --> 01:11:41.659 and for heating up the shower and everything. 01:11:41.859 --> 01:11:44.699 So it was like all self -sufficient there. And, 01:11:44.699 --> 01:11:48.720 you know, we had some friends there. We'd jump 01:11:48.720 --> 01:11:50.659 on the boat and go right out to a surf break 01:11:50.659 --> 01:11:53.239 and go surfing. It was basically to just surf. 01:11:54.500 --> 01:12:01.739 But I will say it definitely is a different lifestyle 01:12:01.739 --> 01:12:03.819 in Central America. I've spent time in Panama, 01:12:03.979 --> 01:12:07.619 Costa Rica. Nicaragua, all for surf trips, mainly. 01:12:09.300 --> 01:12:12.640 This was my third time in Bocas del Toro when 01:12:12.640 --> 01:12:17.039 I went to go live there. And, you know, the way 01:12:17.039 --> 01:12:19.720 of life there is, it's just different. Everyone 01:12:19.720 --> 01:12:22.140 just hangs out. There's a reason why everyone's 01:12:22.140 --> 01:12:25.819 late. It's because no one's in a rush. Like, 01:12:25.899 --> 01:12:28.000 oh, let's get dinner tonight. What time do you 01:12:28.000 --> 01:12:30.859 think? Six, which really means like 730. And 01:12:30.859 --> 01:12:33.300 you just show up when you show up and nobody's 01:12:33.300 --> 01:12:35.880 mad about it. You hang out there, you sit, you 01:12:35.880 --> 01:12:40.000 talk, you enjoy life. You watch the sunset, you 01:12:40.000 --> 01:12:45.560 watch the sunrise. You know, I would I would 01:12:45.560 --> 01:12:48.369 like take a break and just. pop open a coconut 01:12:48.369 --> 01:12:50.069 and drink that when I was thirsty. You know, 01:12:50.090 --> 01:12:53.329 it was just beautiful. It was one, it was one 01:12:53.329 --> 01:12:56.029 of the best things I ever did. Um, and then surfing 01:12:56.029 --> 01:13:00.630 itself is one of, um, one of the greatest gifts 01:13:00.630 --> 01:13:03.029 I've ever had in my life. It's, it's just such 01:13:03.029 --> 01:13:05.630 a, a way to connect with nature, to clear your 01:13:05.630 --> 01:13:08.489 mind. Um, it made such an impact in my life. 01:13:08.890 --> 01:13:14.069 Um, but anyway, so as far as Panama and being 01:13:14.069 --> 01:13:16.899 in Bostel Toro, yeah, I mean, just. the appreciation 01:13:16.899 --> 01:13:20.060 for life and family and community. Community 01:13:20.060 --> 01:13:22.640 is such an important thing. And we kind of lose 01:13:22.640 --> 01:13:26.060 a lot of that in the States. We have like social 01:13:26.060 --> 01:13:28.439 community or social media and things like that, 01:13:28.479 --> 01:13:30.119 but actually spending time putting our phones 01:13:30.119 --> 01:13:34.319 away. I mean, I don't think I, well, obviously 01:13:34.319 --> 01:13:35.979 I was in another country, so I wasn't just using 01:13:35.979 --> 01:13:38.220 my phone all the time, but nobody just like played 01:13:38.220 --> 01:13:41.899 on their phones all day. You know, we just hang 01:13:41.899 --> 01:13:45.890 out and spend time together. um, cook some homemade 01:13:45.890 --> 01:13:49.409 foods and, um, you know, the vegetables were 01:13:49.409 --> 01:13:51.829 fresh. You don't, you know, the eggs they don't 01:13:51.829 --> 01:13:54.710 put in the fridge. They're just like on the counters, 01:13:54.909 --> 01:13:57.329 um, which I guess you only really need to refrigerate 01:13:57.329 --> 01:13:58.890 if you've washed them off and all this stuff. 01:13:58.970 --> 01:14:03.090 But, um, it's, yeah, it's a, it's, it's a way 01:14:03.090 --> 01:14:05.510 of life that I, I definitely can appreciate. 01:14:05.529 --> 01:14:09.829 I wouldn't mind retiring in Central America eventually. 01:14:11.289 --> 01:14:13.770 So what brought you back from Panama and then 01:14:13.770 --> 01:14:16.729 how did that lead you to the fire service? Okay, 01:14:16.789 --> 01:14:21.430 so I ran out of money. But no, the plan was always 01:14:21.430 --> 01:14:25.510 to go for like around six months just to disconnect 01:14:25.510 --> 01:14:29.470 and leave everything behind. When I came back, 01:14:29.569 --> 01:14:34.909 I was kind of over school. You know, I did my 01:14:34.909 --> 01:14:37.850 bachelor's for six years. Then I did my master's 01:14:37.850 --> 01:14:40.810 for three. Because of doing the thesis and everything 01:14:40.810 --> 01:14:42.750 and changing my project halfway through. And 01:14:42.750 --> 01:14:44.390 the next thing I know, I was just burnt out on 01:14:44.390 --> 01:14:45.470 school. I was like, I don't want to go to school 01:14:45.470 --> 01:14:47.850 forever. So I was actually applying to PA schools. 01:14:48.569 --> 01:14:51.729 And me and my husband at the time were over at 01:14:51.729 --> 01:14:55.289 a friend's house who surfed and was a fireman 01:14:55.289 --> 01:14:59.109 for Palm Beach County. My husband was actually 01:14:59.109 --> 01:15:00.869 talking to him. I have like a short attention 01:15:00.869 --> 01:15:02.949 span. So I'm like staring off at something and 01:15:02.949 --> 01:15:05.310 he's asking him basically like, how do you have 01:15:05.310 --> 01:15:07.949 so much time to serve? Like, what do you do? 01:15:08.010 --> 01:15:09.890 And he like, they just started talking about 01:15:09.890 --> 01:15:11.949 work and I wasn't even paying attention. And 01:15:11.949 --> 01:15:13.989 my husband just smacked me on the shoulder and 01:15:13.989 --> 01:15:16.109 he's like, you should be a fireman. And I was 01:15:16.109 --> 01:15:19.050 like, huh? I never really thought of it. I mean, 01:15:19.069 --> 01:15:20.930 I grew up with a single mom. It's not exactly 01:15:20.930 --> 01:15:23.930 like the role that I had pictured for my life 01:15:23.930 --> 01:15:29.260 or even considered. And I it's funny because 01:15:29.260 --> 01:15:31.979 I was like, oh, OK, well, you know, they do medical 01:15:31.979 --> 01:15:35.779 stuff and I like the medical side and. You have 01:15:35.779 --> 01:15:38.539 to be fit. I like working out and I like doing 01:15:38.539 --> 01:15:40.479 adrenaline stuff. I've been skydiving a bunch 01:15:40.479 --> 01:15:42.720 of times and been in a submarine and like, you 01:15:42.720 --> 01:15:44.520 know, I'm a little bit of an adrenaline junkie. 01:15:44.539 --> 01:15:45.699 And I was just like, yeah, that sounds cool. 01:15:45.739 --> 01:15:47.729 And the next day I applied to EMT school. It's 01:15:47.729 --> 01:15:49.989 not a very romantic story. I literally just changed 01:15:49.989 --> 01:15:54.489 my mind like that. So the next day I applied 01:15:54.489 --> 01:15:57.989 to EMT school, got in right away. I was actually 01:15:57.989 --> 01:15:59.989 teaching at the college when I came back. I was 01:15:59.989 --> 01:16:04.909 teaching anatomy labs. So they were kind of laughing 01:16:04.909 --> 01:16:08.350 at me taking an EMT class while I'm teaching 01:16:08.350 --> 01:16:10.810 at the same college, you know, anatomy classes. 01:16:11.010 --> 01:16:12.689 And they were always asking, like, is that right? 01:16:12.770 --> 01:16:15.750 I like it. you know, while I was in class, but 01:16:15.750 --> 01:16:18.310 it was a good time. It was, it was great. Um, 01:16:18.390 --> 01:16:21.449 so I went through EMT school. Um, this is how 01:16:21.449 --> 01:16:23.789 little I knew about the fire service. When I 01:16:23.789 --> 01:16:27.069 did ride times for EMT school, um, I went to 01:16:27.069 --> 01:16:31.029 a firehouse, um, and I met all the guys and, 01:16:31.050 --> 01:16:32.989 you know, I came back home and they're like, 01:16:33.050 --> 01:16:34.590 Oh, how was it? I was like, Oh, I met this guy. 01:16:34.590 --> 01:16:36.369 And, you know, I'm saying their names and I met 01:16:36.369 --> 01:16:38.890 this guy LT. I thought that was like his name. 01:16:39.420 --> 01:16:43.300 I did not realize that was Lieutenant. So many 01:16:43.300 --> 01:16:45.680 LTs is weird. It's a really popular name. Yeah. 01:16:45.680 --> 01:16:48.239 I'm like every, every firehouse has an LT. It's 01:16:48.239 --> 01:16:53.180 so strange. No, but I, I just, I really did not 01:16:53.180 --> 01:16:56.340 understand a lot of the culture. I didn't grow 01:16:56.340 --> 01:16:59.859 up around any firemen. My uncle, he passed away, 01:16:59.899 --> 01:17:02.260 but he was a police officer, but he lived in 01:17:02.260 --> 01:17:05.319 Texas, but I didn't have, you know, I just, I 01:17:05.319 --> 01:17:08.909 didn't have, I just. I didn't really know anything 01:17:08.909 --> 01:17:11.829 about fire service until I jumped into EMT school. 01:17:12.569 --> 01:17:16.350 Then when I was getting ready for fire academy, 01:17:16.489 --> 01:17:19.529 I just, I knew a guy from surfing who was like 01:17:19.529 --> 01:17:21.409 the most fit guy I knew. And I just, he was a 01:17:21.409 --> 01:17:23.149 lifeguard. And I called him up and said, Hey, 01:17:23.170 --> 01:17:26.470 can you train me? You're like the fittest person 01:17:26.470 --> 01:17:31.649 I know. And so he had me meeting him at his lifeguard 01:17:31.649 --> 01:17:36.000 stand. We'd drag tires in the sand and push the 01:17:36.000 --> 01:17:39.060 four -wheeler. There's like the beach four -wheeler, 01:17:39.180 --> 01:17:41.520 he'd have me push it in the sand and like people 01:17:41.520 --> 01:17:43.460 were always coming up to try and help me. And 01:17:43.460 --> 01:17:45.060 I'm like, no, no, no, it's not broken down. He's 01:17:45.060 --> 01:17:48.979 making me work out. But so I worked out outside 01:17:48.979 --> 01:17:52.760 and I got like really obsessed with the training. 01:17:52.859 --> 01:17:55.340 Like I met him as, you know, as many times as 01:17:55.340 --> 01:17:59.220 I could. Our PAT to get in a fire academy was 01:17:59.220 --> 01:18:01.829 basically the combat challenge with a... I think 01:18:01.829 --> 01:18:04.350 at the time it was a 25 pound weight vest, but 01:18:04.350 --> 01:18:07.390 it was the combat challenge course was the entry 01:18:07.390 --> 01:18:11.630 exam for the fire Academy. So I basically mimicked 01:18:11.630 --> 01:18:14.710 as many things as I could of that course. I'd 01:18:14.710 --> 01:18:17.329 work out in a parking garage and carry weights 01:18:17.329 --> 01:18:20.289 up and like hoist up weights from a rope and 01:18:20.289 --> 01:18:24.250 do all kinds of stuff to, to prepare. And so 01:18:24.250 --> 01:18:28.479 I ended up getting into fire school. loving it 01:18:28.479 --> 01:18:31.439 um and that was it like i was like this is it 01:18:31.439 --> 01:18:33.739 this is what i wanted to do i was like i became 01:18:33.739 --> 01:18:39.699 obsessed i um i was the uh first female class 01:18:39.699 --> 01:18:46.960 leader at irsc um which which ended up um uh 01:18:46.960 --> 01:18:51.100 i i ended up failing my midterm um i had like 01:18:51.100 --> 01:18:53.779 a kink in my hose and then when i went to retest 01:18:53.779 --> 01:18:56.819 my ladder got taken by the wind long story short 01:18:57.390 --> 01:19:00.470 It was like the hardest thing ever. I like worked 01:19:00.470 --> 01:19:02.949 so hard to be there, was the first female class 01:19:02.949 --> 01:19:05.010 leader in the history of the fire academy there 01:19:05.010 --> 01:19:08.869 and then failed. So in such an epic failure, 01:19:09.149 --> 01:19:12.569 it was like I was like devastated. So I ended 01:19:12.569 --> 01:19:16.409 up just training harder, going back, did fine. 01:19:16.670 --> 01:19:19.430 I ended up becoming the second, the first and 01:19:19.430 --> 01:19:24.970 second female class leader. But anyway, it all 01:19:24.970 --> 01:19:30.930 worked out. And then, yeah, so I joined the fire 01:19:30.930 --> 01:19:33.609 service. I got hired at 29 and worked for one 01:19:33.609 --> 01:19:35.350 department, switched to the department that I'm 01:19:35.350 --> 01:19:39.409 at now. So I started it later in life and it 01:19:39.409 --> 01:19:43.770 just kind of popped up out of nowhere, unexpected. 01:19:44.229 --> 01:19:49.670 It was quite a turn. So, yeah, that's where it 01:19:49.670 --> 01:19:54.130 started. Talk to me about. The elements of your 01:19:54.130 --> 01:19:55.949 strength and conditioning that you had to focus 01:19:55.949 --> 01:19:58.729 on. When I got into the fire service, I was, 01:19:58.810 --> 01:20:00.810 you know, I don't even know what I weighed before 01:20:00.810 --> 01:20:03.270 I started training, but I mean, I've been very 01:20:03.270 --> 01:20:05.090 tall, like six foot tall and then very, very 01:20:05.090 --> 01:20:07.909 slim. So long levers, but not a lot of strength 01:20:07.909 --> 01:20:10.850 around them. So, you know, I would run, there 01:20:10.850 --> 01:20:13.590 was a four and a half mile course or lap around 01:20:13.590 --> 01:20:17.310 Orlando near station 10 there. And then I would 01:20:17.310 --> 01:20:19.989 on my. lunch breaks from my regular job, I would 01:20:19.989 --> 01:20:22.329 go to the YMCA and lift weights and do pull ups 01:20:22.329 --> 01:20:24.090 on the stairs. And it was almost like a Rocky 01:20:24.090 --> 01:20:25.989 montage. But and then I would go to the fire 01:20:25.989 --> 01:20:28.109 academy early and do the sleds and stairs and 01:20:28.109 --> 01:20:30.550 hose and all kinds of stuff. Because I realized 01:20:30.550 --> 01:20:32.810 that, you know, just because I happen to be a 01:20:32.810 --> 01:20:34.390 certain gender doesn't mean that I've got all 01:20:34.390 --> 01:20:37.130 the elements that's going to make me a good firefighter. 01:20:37.149 --> 01:20:39.689 So I knew that I was, you know, at a motor, I 01:20:39.689 --> 01:20:42.310 was fit, but I didn't have the raw strength. 01:20:42.430 --> 01:20:44.569 And that's what I had to really work on. And 01:20:44.569 --> 01:20:46.569 when you hear this conversation about women in 01:20:46.569 --> 01:20:47.989 the fire service, men in the fire service, whatever, 01:20:48.090 --> 01:20:50.390 it's just about, do you have the physical tools 01:20:50.390 --> 01:20:52.970 regardless of your gender? So I had the humility 01:20:52.970 --> 01:20:55.390 to know all the elements that I had to work on 01:20:55.390 --> 01:20:57.550 and did and worked my ass off and never stopped 01:20:57.550 --> 01:21:01.010 the entire career and then beyond. So when you 01:21:01.010 --> 01:21:04.189 got in and for example, the wind is starting 01:21:04.189 --> 01:21:06.390 to take the ladder from you, what were the tweaks 01:21:06.390 --> 01:21:08.369 that you made in your training and the academy 01:21:08.369 --> 01:21:10.750 and beyond to make sure that having a smaller 01:21:10.750 --> 01:21:12.489 frame, you were still strong enough to be able 01:21:12.489 --> 01:21:15.590 to do the job? Well, I'm glad you asked because 01:21:15.590 --> 01:21:19.010 this has been basically all I've focused on for 01:21:19.010 --> 01:21:20.970 the past however many years. It's part of what 01:21:20.970 --> 01:21:24.050 I taught. What I've taught in fire service is 01:21:24.050 --> 01:21:28.369 basically overcoming using techniques and body 01:21:28.369 --> 01:21:30.670 mechanics in order to accomplish the same tasks 01:21:30.670 --> 01:21:34.850 as everybody else. So when I was training to 01:21:34.850 --> 01:21:36.569 get into fire academy, like I said, I worked 01:21:36.569 --> 01:21:39.369 out with, his name was Justin Baker, a good friend 01:21:39.369 --> 01:21:43.760 of mine. I think one of the important things 01:21:43.760 --> 01:21:48.100 for training was the fact that we did everything 01:21:48.100 --> 01:21:50.680 outside in the sun. A lot of people work out 01:21:50.680 --> 01:21:52.920 in the gym. So we're doing everything not only 01:21:52.920 --> 01:21:55.460 outside in the sun, but in the soft sand on the 01:21:55.460 --> 01:21:57.840 beach. He's having me drag a tire that's filling 01:21:57.840 --> 01:22:01.079 up with sand as I'm dragging it. So a lot of 01:22:01.079 --> 01:22:04.739 resistance training. And our workouts were like 01:22:04.739 --> 01:22:07.920 an hour long. And really it was just... Having 01:22:07.920 --> 01:22:10.500 a good mentor that helped me, he had weights 01:22:10.500 --> 01:22:14.279 and dumbbells. I never worked out in a gym when 01:22:14.279 --> 01:22:19.720 I was training for Fire Academy. It's a weakness 01:22:19.720 --> 01:22:22.920 of mine to not just go lift weights in a gym. 01:22:23.020 --> 01:22:26.279 I do a lot of body weight lifting. I would flip 01:22:26.279 --> 01:22:31.060 tires and use dumbbells and stuff, but I had 01:22:31.060 --> 01:22:32.979 never at that point even used a bench press. 01:22:33.479 --> 01:22:36.140 And when I trained for Fire Academy, I still 01:22:36.140 --> 01:22:39.260 hadn't. Um, but it was a lot of circuit training. 01:22:39.500 --> 01:22:42.739 Um, I'd wear weight vests. I wear the, um, high 01:22:42.739 --> 01:22:46.600 altitude masks, the, um, you know, to restrict 01:22:46.600 --> 01:22:50.340 your breathing, uh, basically to, you know, help 01:22:50.340 --> 01:22:53.760 with your cardiovascular, uh, you know, demands. 01:22:54.039 --> 01:22:59.079 But, um, as I, as I got through, um, as I went 01:22:59.079 --> 01:23:00.560 through fire school and I had issues with the 01:23:00.560 --> 01:23:02.279 ladder. Now I hadn't had any issues up until. 01:23:02.989 --> 01:23:06.010 my midterm where I failed. But the first day 01:23:06.010 --> 01:23:10.789 I ever went to go throw a ladder, it was the 01:23:10.789 --> 01:23:16.130 first time that I definitely, I didn't think 01:23:16.130 --> 01:23:19.189 I was going to be able to do it. And right there, 01:23:19.210 --> 01:23:22.050 I had this moment of, should I quit? Not because 01:23:22.050 --> 01:23:24.210 I wanted to ever quit anything, but because I 01:23:24.210 --> 01:23:25.789 don't think you should do this job unless you're 01:23:25.789 --> 01:23:27.649 going to be able to do every aspect of the job. 01:23:27.789 --> 01:23:30.289 And I was worried that this is something that 01:23:30.289 --> 01:23:33.520 I couldn't do. But, you know, luckily I had really 01:23:33.520 --> 01:23:36.779 great instructors at Indian River State College. 01:23:36.800 --> 01:23:40.380 And even the chief there, he was like my height. 01:23:40.420 --> 01:23:43.500 He's giving me different techniques for body 01:23:43.500 --> 01:23:48.319 mechanics and basically, you know, what to work 01:23:48.319 --> 01:23:51.960 on with it. But also having a good core strength, 01:23:52.079 --> 01:23:57.800 I think, is super important. But, yeah, I as 01:23:57.800 --> 01:24:00.859 you know, not just in fire school, but it really 01:24:00.859 --> 01:24:05.100 it's it's having people and techniques like using 01:24:05.100 --> 01:24:08.340 your your arsenal of friends and people who you 01:24:08.340 --> 01:24:11.119 look up to. I think if there's anything you want 01:24:11.119 --> 01:24:12.859 to do in life, you should go find somebody who 01:24:12.859 --> 01:24:15.020 does it well. And that was like me with Justin 01:24:15.020 --> 01:24:16.779 Baker. Oh, you're the most fit person I know. 01:24:17.220 --> 01:24:19.789 And, you know. you can accomplish everything. 01:24:19.909 --> 01:24:22.210 He got me into the best shape of my life at, 01:24:22.270 --> 01:24:25.310 you know, I think I was like 28 or 29 when I 01:24:25.310 --> 01:24:27.189 started fire Academy. I can't remember, but it 01:24:27.189 --> 01:24:32.369 was the best shape of my life. Um, and so you 01:24:32.369 --> 01:24:34.010 don't, you don't need to go to a traditional 01:24:34.010 --> 01:24:37.390 gym, but you do need to stay active. Cardio is 01:24:37.390 --> 01:24:39.149 super, super important. A lot of people just 01:24:39.149 --> 01:24:40.710 lift weights and they forget about the cardio 01:24:40.710 --> 01:24:43.510 side, but half the times I would do better than 01:24:43.510 --> 01:24:45.789 a lot of the guys because I could outlast them 01:24:45.789 --> 01:24:48.520 and, and I would just continue on. I was like 01:24:48.520 --> 01:24:54.640 the energizer bunny, basically. I would just 01:24:54.640 --> 01:25:00.399 keep on going. But I think that it's something 01:25:00.399 --> 01:25:03.140 that's really important, especially as a female, 01:25:03.340 --> 01:25:07.260 is to continue to work out and stay in shape. 01:25:07.319 --> 01:25:09.279 That's something I've been in the fire service 01:25:09.279 --> 01:25:15.890 for almost 10 years now. It's been something 01:25:15.890 --> 01:25:18.890 that's been very important that I've always tried 01:25:18.890 --> 01:25:21.069 to preach and to push. I teach at the local fire 01:25:21.069 --> 01:25:24.010 academy. I do a workout every lunch break in 01:25:24.010 --> 01:25:30.270 full gear on air. And it's not just to set an 01:25:30.270 --> 01:25:33.470 example. I think it's important to set an example 01:25:33.470 --> 01:25:35.569 to show that you're going to go put in the work, 01:25:35.590 --> 01:25:40.989 but it's also because as a 5 '4 and a half woman, 01:25:42.079 --> 01:25:44.479 I have to work out. I have to stay in shape to 01:25:44.479 --> 01:25:46.539 do my job, right? Some people are like, why are 01:25:46.539 --> 01:25:49.159 you always doing it? I have to. There was a time 01:25:49.159 --> 01:25:51.439 when I got hired on and I'd go throw ladders 01:25:51.439 --> 01:25:53.520 all the time. And the guys were like, why are 01:25:53.520 --> 01:25:56.140 you always throwing a ladder? And I'm like, I 01:25:56.140 --> 01:25:59.279 have to. You don't understand. If I don't throw 01:25:59.279 --> 01:26:02.810 ladders, then I can't. Do it. You know, I have 01:26:02.810 --> 01:26:05.109 to stay active doing it. I have to be efficient 01:26:05.109 --> 01:26:07.270 and proficient at it. So if I'm not throwing 01:26:07.270 --> 01:26:09.310 ladders, I'm doing a disservice to everybody 01:26:09.310 --> 01:26:11.750 in the community when it's needed. Right. And, 01:26:11.810 --> 01:26:14.970 you know, you have to stay active in that for 01:26:14.970 --> 01:26:17.649 sure. So, yeah, I mean, health and fitness is 01:26:17.649 --> 01:26:21.250 massive, especially as a female for everyone. 01:26:21.310 --> 01:26:24.050 But especially as a female, I mean, you know, 01:26:24.050 --> 01:26:28.500 genetics alone, we're usually. stronger lower 01:26:28.500 --> 01:26:30.739 body i mean everybody's stronger in their legs 01:26:30.739 --> 01:26:33.220 i mean it's your bigger muscles but you know 01:26:33.220 --> 01:26:35.399 guys tend to have higher upper body strength 01:26:35.399 --> 01:26:37.399 and there's a lot of ways i think there's anything 01:26:37.399 --> 01:26:39.460 that you can overcome if you spend enough time 01:26:39.460 --> 01:26:44.260 and learn techniques so um which is how i ended 01:26:44.260 --> 01:26:49.220 up basically teaching later on um you know but 01:26:49.220 --> 01:26:51.890 yes that was a long way of saying I like to work 01:26:51.890 --> 01:26:55.409 out. No, but it's important. But it's funny because 01:26:55.409 --> 01:26:57.109 you said when you were five foot four, you needed 01:26:57.109 --> 01:26:59.649 to work out. When I was six foot and I needed 01:26:59.649 --> 01:27:01.829 to work out, I think this is the point. If you're 01:27:01.829 --> 01:27:04.510 an ex -linebacker turned firefighter, you need 01:27:04.510 --> 01:27:06.930 to work out. It's just we're all focusing on 01:27:06.930 --> 01:27:09.010 different things. The linebacker, chances are 01:27:09.010 --> 01:27:10.670 their endurance isn't going to be great unless 01:27:10.670 --> 01:27:13.789 they're a physical phenom. And then the slimmer 01:27:13.789 --> 01:27:15.489 person is going to have to work on their strength. 01:27:15.569 --> 01:27:17.369 And the kind of mesomorph might have to kind 01:27:17.369 --> 01:27:20.250 of balance the two of them. But the point is. 01:27:20.880 --> 01:27:23.140 you know, the goal is that you're the best version 01:27:23.140 --> 01:27:25.640 of yourself so you can respond. So these guys 01:27:25.640 --> 01:27:27.399 that are like, well, you know, I can still make 01:27:27.399 --> 01:27:28.960 it happen on the fire ground. It's like, okay, 01:27:28.979 --> 01:27:30.699 that's all well and good. But if you drop 30 01:27:30.699 --> 01:27:33.479 pounds and stop smoking, imagine how much better 01:27:33.479 --> 01:27:36.479 you would be. And what if you carry with you 01:27:36.479 --> 01:27:38.619 the fact that you couldn't make it up that high 01:27:38.619 --> 01:27:42.079 rise because you hadn't trained? What is that 01:27:42.079 --> 01:27:43.659 going to do to you mentally? Because you know 01:27:43.659 --> 01:27:45.939 damn well that you chose a lazy boy over the 01:27:45.939 --> 01:27:49.119 gym every time you're on shift. Right. Yeah. 01:27:49.199 --> 01:27:54.210 I mean, That's obviously its own epidemic in 01:27:54.210 --> 01:28:00.630 the fire service is, you know, not staying fit. 01:28:00.689 --> 01:28:03.890 I think it's a huge disservice to yourself and 01:28:03.890 --> 01:28:07.750 to everyone that you're trying to serve. You 01:28:07.750 --> 01:28:13.489 know, not just working out, but the fact that. 01:28:14.090 --> 01:28:17.350 Um, I really, it's why conferences were so important 01:28:17.350 --> 01:28:19.949 to me because I had to really hone in on my techniques 01:28:19.949 --> 01:28:22.130 because if I couldn't just like do things from 01:28:22.130 --> 01:28:24.590 brute strength, I really had to learn techniques 01:28:24.590 --> 01:28:29.449 to do everything. Um, and so like, I think that's 01:28:29.449 --> 01:28:31.390 too, it's super important. It's why reps are 01:28:31.390 --> 01:28:33.430 so important. So not only staying physically 01:28:33.430 --> 01:28:35.569 fit, but finding those techniques so that you 01:28:35.569 --> 01:28:40.109 can function and, um, do your job without basically, 01:28:40.250 --> 01:28:45.840 you know, um, So you can function and do it just 01:28:45.840 --> 01:28:47.760 as well as anybody else. And I just think that 01:28:47.760 --> 01:28:50.939 like, that's also a really important aspect. 01:28:51.199 --> 01:28:54.020 And conferences and trainings made a huge difference 01:28:54.020 --> 01:28:56.260 for that for me. You know, like far more than, 01:28:56.359 --> 01:28:59.680 I mean, I got a lot of training in my departments 01:28:59.680 --> 01:29:01.840 and with people on the cruise, but you go to 01:29:01.840 --> 01:29:03.300 a conference and you're learning from people 01:29:03.300 --> 01:29:04.979 all over the country. They got different techniques. 01:29:05.079 --> 01:29:06.479 They got different ways of doing things that 01:29:06.479 --> 01:29:09.380 made a massive difference in my confidence and 01:29:09.380 --> 01:29:14.279 my skills. It blew me away when I first entered 01:29:14.279 --> 01:29:16.479 the fire service and then kind of had been on 01:29:16.479 --> 01:29:19.239 long enough to start reflecting on the environment 01:29:19.239 --> 01:29:21.720 that we work in, that there was such a resistance 01:29:21.720 --> 01:29:24.640 to fitness standards. And you mentioned about 01:29:24.640 --> 01:29:26.500 Justin being a lifeguard. A lot of the ocean 01:29:26.500 --> 01:29:28.699 lifeguards have had on here. And I was a open 01:29:28.699 --> 01:29:31.159 water lifeguard before. You know, you have to 01:29:31.159 --> 01:29:33.100 recertify. A lot of the ocean guys are doing 01:29:33.100 --> 01:29:35.680 it every six months. And if you don't recertify, 01:29:35.899 --> 01:29:39.100 you're not a lifeguard anymore. And, you know, 01:29:39.100 --> 01:29:41.060 there's this pushback again about, oh, but, you 01:29:41.060 --> 01:29:42.600 know, it's not fair. And what about if they take 01:29:42.600 --> 01:29:45.479 my job? And ironically, yesterday on Facebook 01:29:45.479 --> 01:29:49.600 Memories, I cashed out my pension to do this 01:29:49.600 --> 01:29:52.560 job, this podcast. And it got to the point where 01:29:52.560 --> 01:29:54.100 I was almost out of money and I hadn't got a 01:29:54.100 --> 01:29:57.359 sponsor. And so I was getting ready to test yet 01:29:57.359 --> 01:30:01.659 again for department number five. And so, you 01:30:01.659 --> 01:30:03.920 know, having humility, I was like, well, let 01:30:03.920 --> 01:30:07.079 me go do a practice CPAT and make sure that I'm 01:30:07.079 --> 01:30:10.470 ready. so that then I get all these pieces together 01:30:10.470 --> 01:30:13.189 for the fire teams or whatever I end up doing. 01:30:13.670 --> 01:30:18.489 And at 45 years old, my CPAT was 720. I'm not 01:30:18.489 --> 01:30:21.390 the fastest. I've never won medals for powerlifting. 01:30:21.489 --> 01:30:24.010 I've never won medals for sprinting. Never won 01:30:24.010 --> 01:30:26.470 medals for triathlon. You know what I mean? I'm 01:30:26.470 --> 01:30:29.529 not an elite athlete. It's just someone who took 01:30:29.529 --> 01:30:33.050 the job seriously. So if a 45 -year -old skinny 01:30:33.050 --> 01:30:37.020 dude can take three minutes off a CPAT, then 01:30:37.020 --> 01:30:39.539 I don't understand how people can say it's not 01:30:39.539 --> 01:30:42.840 fair to have a fitness standard when comparable 01:30:42.840 --> 01:30:46.920 professions like ocean lifeguarding and special 01:30:46.920 --> 01:30:50.720 forces and SWAT all have that bench set. And 01:30:50.720 --> 01:30:52.739 if you fall below it... You don't do the job 01:30:52.739 --> 01:30:55.699 anymore. So that's kind of my perspective and 01:30:55.699 --> 01:30:58.319 my frustrations. You work so hard to get this 01:30:58.319 --> 01:31:00.460 profession. You got a background in, you know, 01:31:00.460 --> 01:31:04.159 the health side as well. Talk to me about fitness 01:31:04.159 --> 01:31:06.579 standards and hiring standards as well as we're 01:31:06.579 --> 01:31:09.619 seeing them start to slip. Yeah, actually, this 01:31:09.619 --> 01:31:12.300 is something I'm very passionate about as far 01:31:12.300 --> 01:31:16.359 as, you know, I teach fire academy and I just. 01:31:17.869 --> 01:31:20.949 I think it's super important to be able to pass 01:31:20.949 --> 01:31:23.609 fitness standards. I don't think that there should 01:31:23.609 --> 01:31:26.149 be a separate standard for females or anyone 01:31:26.149 --> 01:31:28.789 because we are all competing for the same job. 01:31:28.850 --> 01:31:32.189 We're all expected to do the same thing. So I'm 01:31:32.189 --> 01:31:37.130 very passionate on you either have trained and 01:31:37.130 --> 01:31:39.489 you have prepared for it or you have not, right? 01:31:40.270 --> 01:31:43.449 And it has nothing to do with your age, your 01:31:43.449 --> 01:31:46.430 gender. your race, anything like that. I think 01:31:46.430 --> 01:31:49.890 the most important thing is being able to actually 01:31:49.890 --> 01:31:53.270 do what you are set out to do, train to be there. 01:31:53.409 --> 01:31:56.329 I trained really hard to be there. I spent all 01:31:56.329 --> 01:31:58.949 my time. Justin's a fireman as well now. He was 01:31:58.949 --> 01:32:02.430 a lifeguard at the time. But like, you know, 01:32:02.529 --> 01:32:05.710 I called him every day. We were doing two workouts 01:32:05.710 --> 01:32:09.029 a day at times. And as far as continuing, like 01:32:09.029 --> 01:32:12.189 there has been times where. Women specifically 01:32:12.189 --> 01:32:14.750 have been hired on when they haven't passed their 01:32:14.750 --> 01:32:17.729 times or or they've gotten into certain classes. 01:32:17.909 --> 01:32:23.529 And I just it's. It's almost like an insult because 01:32:23.529 --> 01:32:26.789 you a lot of us have spent a lot of time to work 01:32:26.789 --> 01:32:29.010 to be there. And I don't think that something 01:32:29.010 --> 01:32:31.470 should just be handed to you for fairness. It's 01:32:31.470 --> 01:32:34.189 not fair. It's not fair in any way, because then 01:32:34.189 --> 01:32:38.170 you're not helping the, you know. The rest of 01:32:38.170 --> 01:32:40.329 the people who have to work with the person, 01:32:40.489 --> 01:32:43.569 you're not helping the community who needs somebody 01:32:43.569 --> 01:32:45.510 who's trained and fit to be able to get them 01:32:45.510 --> 01:32:48.090 out. And, you know, it is what it is. You've 01:32:48.090 --> 01:32:50.630 either trained and prepared for this job or you 01:32:50.630 --> 01:32:53.489 haven't. And on top of it, you're right, as far 01:32:53.489 --> 01:32:56.289 as maintaining it. I mean, it's very easy to 01:32:56.289 --> 01:32:58.449 get complacent. It's very easy to get tired and 01:32:58.449 --> 01:33:01.350 burnt out and have life go on where you want 01:33:01.350 --> 01:33:03.409 to just relax and you don't want to work out. 01:33:04.500 --> 01:33:08.140 Having fitness standards that are set to continue 01:33:08.140 --> 01:33:11.000 on, I think, is imperative. Our department has 01:33:11.000 --> 01:33:13.439 just gone to the past few years doing the every 01:33:13.439 --> 01:33:19.819 year as our standard. And so I'm glad we started 01:33:19.819 --> 01:33:23.300 doing that. I think it's important. You know, 01:33:23.319 --> 01:33:26.159 not every department has a fitness standard that 01:33:26.159 --> 01:33:31.739 we do every year, but it's. It isn't just to 01:33:31.739 --> 01:33:34.699 do your job well, it's to it's to maintain your 01:33:34.699 --> 01:33:37.439 health while doing this job. Like, you know, 01:33:37.439 --> 01:33:40.279 not only do you need it, if you have to carry 01:33:40.279 --> 01:33:43.180 extrication equipment and gear, you know, you 01:33:43.180 --> 01:33:48.039 know, and, you know, perform an extrication or, 01:33:48.060 --> 01:33:50.640 you know, throw ladders and do VES or whatever 01:33:50.640 --> 01:33:52.960 you're doing, you need you need that fitness 01:33:52.960 --> 01:33:55.720 standard, you need that training. And if you 01:33:55.720 --> 01:33:58.359 haven't been and you get assigned tasks, I mean. 01:33:58.800 --> 01:34:00.779 It's kind of like you're taking a risk, right? 01:34:00.880 --> 01:34:05.260 You're gambling on yourself to be able to accomplish 01:34:05.260 --> 01:34:08.800 it. And the people who you're going to save, 01:34:09.079 --> 01:34:13.779 they need you at your best. So yeah, I couldn't 01:34:13.779 --> 01:34:16.119 agree more with keeping up fitness standards. 01:34:17.920 --> 01:34:20.819 I'm very passionate about it. I think it's something 01:34:20.819 --> 01:34:24.739 I try and work out every shift. It doesn't happen 01:34:24.739 --> 01:34:27.439 every shift sometimes. I think it's also important. 01:34:27.979 --> 01:34:30.619 Just as important to work out, it is to rest 01:34:30.619 --> 01:34:33.079 sometimes. There are days where maybe you do 01:34:33.079 --> 01:34:35.119 need to sit on the recliner. Maybe you just need 01:34:35.119 --> 01:34:37.579 a break and that's okay. As long as that's not 01:34:37.579 --> 01:34:42.140 your standard, right? Like your body needs rest. 01:34:42.520 --> 01:34:44.880 You know, sometimes I have this thing where I 01:34:44.880 --> 01:34:46.979 try and work out after shift immediately. I go 01:34:46.979 --> 01:34:49.039 to the stadium whenever I'm out of shift. If 01:34:49.039 --> 01:34:50.800 I'm not teaching fire academy, if I'm at fire 01:34:50.800 --> 01:34:53.020 academy, I do an air comp during my lunch break. 01:34:53.279 --> 01:34:56.939 But there's days where I go to work out. And 01:34:56.939 --> 01:35:00.199 I'm, I'm just spent, I'm exhausted and I'll do 01:35:00.199 --> 01:35:03.560 like a very minimal workout. Sometimes I'll go 01:35:03.560 --> 01:35:05.880 there and I'm just like, I am too tired and I 01:35:05.880 --> 01:35:08.340 leave. And it's not because I don't want to continue 01:35:08.340 --> 01:35:10.579 my fitness, but you, you, it's important to listen 01:35:10.579 --> 01:35:12.539 to your body. Sometimes you just need to rest, 01:35:12.560 --> 01:35:15.600 you know, like you're overexerting your lack 01:35:15.600 --> 01:35:19.800 of sleep. So, you know, but overall, yes, fitness 01:35:19.800 --> 01:35:23.539 and, and, and, um, you know, training standards, 01:35:23.779 --> 01:35:28.050 they need to. People need to be held accountable 01:35:28.050 --> 01:35:30.189 throughout their career to continue on their 01:35:30.189 --> 01:35:33.590 career. It's for their own benefit. Exactly. 01:35:34.189 --> 01:35:36.289 That's the thing that's so crazy with the conversation. 01:35:36.449 --> 01:35:39.569 There's no downside. We have said this so many 01:35:39.569 --> 01:35:42.890 times. Our certification in Florida is literally 01:35:42.890 --> 01:35:45.829 labeled minimum standards. This is the shittiest 01:35:45.829 --> 01:35:48.369 you should ever be your entire career. You just 01:35:48.369 --> 01:35:50.909 squeak through the door. Here's the key to the 01:35:50.909 --> 01:35:54.430 lock. By maintaining that, You know, if you do 01:35:54.430 --> 01:35:56.289 it immediately, like this is the annual standard, 01:35:56.489 --> 01:35:58.609 no one's going to say, well, it's not fair because 01:35:58.609 --> 01:36:00.909 you just did it in the academy. But now you've 01:36:00.909 --> 01:36:02.529 got people saying it's not fair. You're trying 01:36:02.529 --> 01:36:04.710 to take our jobs and no one's saying we're going 01:36:04.710 --> 01:36:06.289 to implement a standard tomorrow. And if you 01:36:06.289 --> 01:36:08.210 can't meet it, you're fired. Of course, there 01:36:08.210 --> 01:36:10.470 would be a year, two year on ramp to make sure 01:36:10.470 --> 01:36:13.149 everyone's kind of brought up to where they need 01:36:13.149 --> 01:36:15.569 to be. But like you said, the other thing is 01:36:15.569 --> 01:36:18.590 now you're prolonging lifespan. So by opposing 01:36:18.590 --> 01:36:21.149 fitness standards, you're saying it's fine that 01:36:21.149 --> 01:36:23.119 we're losing people in their 50s. I've got no 01:36:23.119 --> 01:36:24.899 problem with that. Just don't try and take our 01:36:24.899 --> 01:36:26.680 jobs. Like, no, that's bullshit. That's another 01:36:26.680 --> 01:36:30.100 thing with the cowardice. If you really actually 01:36:30.100 --> 01:36:32.600 care about your men and women, you'd make damn 01:36:32.600 --> 01:36:34.560 sure. And this goes hand in hand. You've got 01:36:34.560 --> 01:36:36.119 to create an environment of rest and recovery. 01:36:36.260 --> 01:36:38.520 So the 42 hour work week, and then you've got 01:36:38.520 --> 01:36:40.819 to put in a fitness standard and one that's job 01:36:40.819 --> 01:36:42.579 related. And the beautiful thing about ours is 01:36:42.579 --> 01:36:44.819 you can do a CPAT or the fire sled version of 01:36:44.819 --> 01:36:47.720 a CPAT. You did that at the beginning. You just 01:36:47.720 --> 01:36:49.420 keep doing it. Like you said, it doesn't matter 01:36:49.420 --> 01:36:51.600 black, white, gay, straight, male, female, a 01:36:51.600 --> 01:36:53.520 hose is a hose, a ladder is a ladder. So no one 01:36:53.520 --> 01:36:55.220 can fucking cry about the fact that you're being 01:36:55.220 --> 01:36:58.119 asked to do fire ground tasks. But then what 01:36:58.119 --> 01:36:59.659 is going to happen? You're going to transition 01:36:59.659 --> 01:37:01.500 out. You're going to have a healthy retirement. 01:37:01.640 --> 01:37:04.020 You're going to watch your grandkids grow, you 01:37:04.020 --> 01:37:07.640 know, versus some, you know, fricking pussy ass 01:37:07.640 --> 01:37:11.239 version of, of, you know, justification of why 01:37:11.239 --> 01:37:13.060 you shouldn't have a fitness standard. And now 01:37:13.060 --> 01:37:14.640 you're burying your men and women before they 01:37:14.640 --> 01:37:17.500 even get to retire. So there is no downside, 01:37:17.680 --> 01:37:20.100 again, apart from having the courage to stand 01:37:20.100 --> 01:37:23.000 up and say, you know what, we do need this. Excuse 01:37:23.000 --> 01:37:24.819 me. We do need the standard in place. We were 01:37:24.819 --> 01:37:28.479 wrong. Let's change it. Absolutely. I mean, I 01:37:28.479 --> 01:37:34.600 think it's really easy for, you know, people 01:37:34.600 --> 01:37:39.260 who make a lot of administrative decisions to 01:37:39.260 --> 01:37:41.659 kind of forget some of the things that, you know, 01:37:41.659 --> 01:37:44.649 once they've been here. once they left the line. 01:37:45.430 --> 01:37:50.810 But, you know, I think sometimes the focus can 01:37:50.810 --> 01:37:54.010 be on the wrong thing. We're focused more on 01:37:54.010 --> 01:37:56.270 how we present, how we look to the public versus 01:37:56.270 --> 01:37:58.649 how good we are at our jobs, how fit we are, 01:37:58.810 --> 01:38:01.289 how good our health is, how good our training 01:38:01.289 --> 01:38:06.210 is. And I think if we just get back to the basics 01:38:06.210 --> 01:38:09.550 of that, it makes everybody actually happier 01:38:09.550 --> 01:38:12.550 and better at work. Like, the more training you 01:38:12.550 --> 01:38:14.170 do, the more knowledgeable you are, the more 01:38:14.170 --> 01:38:15.850 confident you are in your job, the more you can 01:38:15.850 --> 01:38:19.510 do things securely. The more fit you are, same 01:38:19.510 --> 01:38:21.550 thing. The more confident in your job, the more 01:38:21.550 --> 01:38:23.829 you're able to do well, the more you take care 01:38:23.829 --> 01:38:27.449 of your body. Everybody wins, right? So, yeah, 01:38:27.510 --> 01:38:30.510 I mean, 100%, I think. Overall, everybody wins. 01:38:30.550 --> 01:38:32.609 The community wins and you win. Your department 01:38:32.609 --> 01:38:34.470 wins. When your people are happy and healthy, 01:38:34.609 --> 01:38:38.170 everybody works better. So yeah, I mean, keeping 01:38:38.170 --> 01:38:40.789 a health standard is imperative. Being able to 01:38:40.789 --> 01:38:42.970 get sleep, taking care of yourself. The happier 01:38:42.970 --> 01:38:45.210 you are as a person, the better you perform. 01:38:45.949 --> 01:38:49.489 And that goes without saying with staying fit, 01:38:49.630 --> 01:38:52.289 eating healthy, working out, sleeping. I mean, 01:38:52.310 --> 01:38:57.289 it's all the necessities of life. 100%. Well, 01:38:57.329 --> 01:38:59.380 speaking of training, you kind of, mentioned 01:38:59.380 --> 01:39:01.779 earlier how you found yourself in the training 01:39:01.779 --> 01:39:05.300 position very early so walk me through you know 01:39:05.300 --> 01:39:07.720 how that happened some of the the elements that 01:39:07.720 --> 01:39:10.079 you train on now and then you know what were 01:39:10.079 --> 01:39:13.279 the resistances that you encountered okay so 01:39:13.279 --> 01:39:20.579 yes um i uh i didn't even have two years on the 01:39:20.579 --> 01:39:23.220 job yet and i went to uh the mickelbeck conference 01:39:23.220 --> 01:39:29.489 in um osceola and um Chief Halton, Bobby Halton 01:39:29.489 --> 01:39:33.170 was speaking. And basically it was, you know, 01:39:33.170 --> 01:39:36.229 I had already been to the Orlando Fire Conference 01:39:36.229 --> 01:39:38.069 and Fort Lauderdale Fire Conference. I mean, 01:39:38.170 --> 01:39:41.829 you know. I went to every conference I could 01:39:41.829 --> 01:39:43.810 possibly get my hands on and every class I take 01:39:43.810 --> 01:39:46.050 in survival class, I take in whatever, any class 01:39:46.050 --> 01:39:49.229 I could take, I took. And here I am at the conference 01:39:49.229 --> 01:39:52.529 and I went to go talk to Chief Halton afterwards 01:39:52.529 --> 01:39:55.310 about his lecture and a lot of the things he 01:39:55.310 --> 01:39:59.510 said. And we just got to talking and out of nowhere, 01:39:59.609 --> 01:40:03.090 he says to me, oh, I want you to come teach at 01:40:03.090 --> 01:40:08.149 FDIC. And I literally didn't answer him because 01:40:08.149 --> 01:40:11.289 I'm like, he probably thinks. I have a lot more 01:40:11.289 --> 01:40:13.409 time on in the fire service because I'm, you 01:40:13.409 --> 01:40:20.350 know, I'm, you know, 30. But one of my friends 01:40:20.350 --> 01:40:22.170 was standing right next to me. His name is Lou 01:40:22.170 --> 01:40:24.930 Castanelli. He's from Poughkeepsie. And he just 01:40:24.930 --> 01:40:28.609 responds for me because I was stunned. And he 01:40:28.609 --> 01:40:30.770 just said, what she's trying to say, chief, is 01:40:30.770 --> 01:40:35.890 she'd love to. So right away, I just said to 01:40:35.890 --> 01:40:41.649 him, like, oh. Listen, yes, I, you know, that 01:40:41.649 --> 01:40:44.710 is a huge opportunity. And I absolutely appreciate 01:40:44.710 --> 01:40:47.289 you offering that to me. But just to let you 01:40:47.289 --> 01:40:49.970 know, by the time FDIC rolls around, I'll have 01:40:49.970 --> 01:40:52.210 a total of two years in the fire service. So 01:40:52.210 --> 01:40:54.170 you can take that back and I won't be offended. 01:40:54.869 --> 01:40:58.449 That's what I told him. And he looks at me and 01:40:58.449 --> 01:41:02.010 he goes, no, I want you to teach at FDIC. And 01:41:02.010 --> 01:41:10.130 I, I was just like, okay. OK, so he gave me a 01:41:10.130 --> 01:41:11.369 cell phone number and he's like, I want you to 01:41:11.369 --> 01:41:14.810 call me. Don't worry. It's a this is what he 01:41:14.810 --> 01:41:16.989 tells me. It's a female firefighter fitness class. 01:41:17.409 --> 01:41:22.189 Now, it was not a firefighter fitness class. 01:41:22.770 --> 01:41:27.010 But anyway, this this woman, Katie Johnson, was 01:41:27.010 --> 01:41:29.789 leading the class and he he hooked me up with 01:41:29.789 --> 01:41:31.649 her. He basically told her that I'm going to 01:41:31.649 --> 01:41:34.399 be in the group. Um, I didn't, I didn't just 01:41:34.399 --> 01:41:36.640 call him right away because I have a lot of respect 01:41:36.640 --> 01:41:39.220 for the fire service and for teaching. And I 01:41:39.220 --> 01:41:42.380 understand that it takes time, um, and experience 01:41:42.380 --> 01:41:45.020 before you're put in a role like that. I, I, 01:41:45.020 --> 01:41:46.760 you know, I had been a teacher for a while and, 01:41:46.779 --> 01:41:49.880 um, you know, at the local college and I taught 01:41:49.880 --> 01:41:52.119 at FAU while I was getting my undergrad. And 01:41:52.119 --> 01:41:55.539 I just, I have an appreciation for experience 01:41:55.539 --> 01:42:00.060 and things like that. And so, um, before I called 01:42:00.060 --> 01:42:04.079 Chief Halton. I got advice from some really good 01:42:04.079 --> 01:42:07.119 friends of mine and people that I respect in 01:42:07.119 --> 01:42:12.560 the fire service. And one of them was Mike Salzano. 01:42:12.619 --> 01:42:14.760 He's a chief in Fort Lauderdale. And he said 01:42:14.760 --> 01:42:16.800 something that I take with me everywhere I go 01:42:16.800 --> 01:42:20.239 in life, because I basically told him like, hey, 01:42:20.439 --> 01:42:22.579 what you know, what should I do? I was given 01:42:22.579 --> 01:42:24.880 this opportunity. I know I only I don't have 01:42:24.880 --> 01:42:28.119 that much time on. I know I'm going to be given 01:42:28.119 --> 01:42:32.439 a hard time. And he says, and at this point I 01:42:32.439 --> 01:42:34.920 had talked to Katie and basically the class was 01:42:34.920 --> 01:42:38.880 engine and truck work. Right. And she said, you 01:42:38.880 --> 01:42:40.659 know, what do you think you could work on? And 01:42:40.659 --> 01:42:42.800 I said, oh, there was a victim removal portion. 01:42:43.100 --> 01:42:45.380 And I said, oh, I'd really like to do the victim 01:42:45.380 --> 01:42:48.479 removal portion. It was something that I struggled 01:42:48.479 --> 01:42:52.420 with and did a lot of training and techniques 01:42:52.420 --> 01:42:54.500 and things. I said, you know, that's what I'd 01:42:54.500 --> 01:42:55.800 like to work on it. Well, she ended up making 01:42:55.800 --> 01:43:00.329 me the lead of that section. Right. So. Back 01:43:00.329 --> 01:43:05.989 to talking to Mike, I was just like, you know, 01:43:05.989 --> 01:43:07.930 what should I do? And he says, he's like, all 01:43:07.930 --> 01:43:12.029 right. He's like, do you think that you're going 01:43:12.029 --> 01:43:13.489 to teach something that's going to help people? 01:43:14.229 --> 01:43:18.229 I said, yes. He's like, so he's like, do you 01:43:18.229 --> 01:43:19.529 think you're going to teach something that people 01:43:19.529 --> 01:43:21.449 are going to use to save lives? I said, yes. 01:43:21.630 --> 01:43:24.510 And he's like, then fucking do it and just do 01:43:24.510 --> 01:43:26.739 a good fucking job. That's it. Don't worry about 01:43:26.739 --> 01:43:28.739 what everybody else thinks. If you're going to 01:43:28.739 --> 01:43:30.079 do something, it's going to help people to do 01:43:30.079 --> 01:43:34.439 it. That's it. It's that simple. And I was like, 01:43:34.560 --> 01:43:38.359 okay, you know, because there's all these egos 01:43:38.359 --> 01:43:40.239 and there's all these issues and everybody wants 01:43:40.239 --> 01:43:42.779 to teach. And I didn't want to be that, you know, 01:43:42.779 --> 01:43:45.100 he's like, you know, don't go, don't go around 01:43:45.100 --> 01:43:46.960 like bragging that you're teaching. Don't do 01:43:46.960 --> 01:43:50.159 this. Just go teach and do a good job. And if 01:43:50.159 --> 01:43:52.699 you do it, do a good job. Make sure that, you 01:43:52.699 --> 01:43:55.020 know, you're teaching something that has meaning 01:43:55.020 --> 01:43:57.300 that people can take back. And I was like, all 01:43:57.300 --> 01:44:03.020 right. And it's advice that I use for a lot of 01:44:03.020 --> 01:44:05.060 different things in my life that it just meant 01:44:05.060 --> 01:44:08.739 a lot. But I talked to him. I talked to a couple 01:44:08.739 --> 01:44:11.399 other guys. And basically, so I decided to go 01:44:11.399 --> 01:44:16.100 ahead with it. You know, I ended up teaching 01:44:16.100 --> 01:44:19.359 at FDIC. I think it was the first year of 2018, 01:44:19.640 --> 01:44:25.479 maybe. I think it was 2018. But anyway, I ended 01:44:25.479 --> 01:44:28.880 up teaching VES and victim removal. And the whole 01:44:28.880 --> 01:44:32.140 reason that it was something that I wanted to 01:44:32.140 --> 01:44:34.079 teach is because when I was training, when I 01:44:34.079 --> 01:44:36.340 first got hired on in my first department, I 01:44:36.340 --> 01:44:38.920 had, we were doing VES training and I had to 01:44:38.920 --> 01:44:40.760 throw a guy out a window and I failed at it. 01:44:41.119 --> 01:44:46.460 I could not get him out. I had that moment again, 01:44:46.539 --> 01:44:48.479 just like with the ladder, like, oh my God, I 01:44:48.479 --> 01:44:50.600 shouldn't do this job if I can't do all the aspects 01:44:50.600 --> 01:44:55.180 of this job. But I ended up training and I went 01:44:55.180 --> 01:44:58.920 to conferences and I took VES classes and I came 01:44:58.920 --> 01:45:03.010 up with some things on my own. I went to Fort 01:45:03.010 --> 01:45:05.170 Lauderdale Fire Expo and Orlando Fire Conference. 01:45:05.229 --> 01:45:07.750 And those those two conferences alone were like 01:45:07.750 --> 01:45:12.850 huge for my training, understanding. And I like 01:45:12.850 --> 01:45:15.069 all of the instructors were more than willing 01:45:15.069 --> 01:45:16.909 to help me with any techniques that I needed 01:45:16.909 --> 01:45:20.329 extra help on. And basically, I took the thing 01:45:20.329 --> 01:45:23.869 that I sucked at the most and became really proficient 01:45:23.869 --> 01:45:27.069 at it so that it was something that. You know, 01:45:27.069 --> 01:45:29.210 I never wanted to question if I could do that 01:45:29.210 --> 01:45:34.350 part of the job. So anyway, I ended up between 01:45:34.350 --> 01:45:37.010 things that I've accumulated from classes and 01:45:37.010 --> 01:45:38.689 coming up with some of my own techniques and 01:45:38.689 --> 01:45:41.310 maneuvers. It became a passion of mine to be 01:45:41.310 --> 01:45:43.630 able to move victims and like be able to throw, 01:45:43.750 --> 01:45:49.439 you know. large man out windows. Um, but, um, 01:45:49.739 --> 01:45:53.460 so yeah, I, um, so I, I went and I taught for, 01:45:53.520 --> 01:45:57.020 uh, FDIC as, um, teaching in the victim removal 01:45:57.020 --> 01:46:00.859 portion. Um, uh, my first year there, I did that 01:46:00.859 --> 01:46:03.500 for a couple of years with Katie, um, because 01:46:03.500 --> 01:46:06.880 of my class, my class went really well. I did 01:46:06.880 --> 01:46:09.260 what Mike told me to, I did a good job. I did. 01:46:09.279 --> 01:46:12.899 I spent the time to make sure that, um, you know, 01:46:12.920 --> 01:46:15.989 I wasn't just. out there BSing. Like I took the 01:46:15.989 --> 01:46:19.350 time to, to really hopefully make a big impact. 01:46:19.510 --> 01:46:22.449 And I, whenever I teach, I teach everything myself. 01:46:22.909 --> 01:46:26.210 In other words, I, there's lots of people who 01:46:26.210 --> 01:46:30.170 teach with me who have assisted me, but I purposely 01:46:30.170 --> 01:46:32.090 will do all the victim jags and throw people 01:46:32.090 --> 01:46:33.850 out a window because I want to make sure that 01:46:33.850 --> 01:46:36.409 they know if I can do it and my size, then you 01:46:36.409 --> 01:46:38.689 can definitely do it. It does. It doesn't speak 01:46:38.689 --> 01:46:41.090 the same way. If you have a big bulky six foot 01:46:41.090 --> 01:46:44.810 tall dude, you know. moving people around. Although 01:46:44.810 --> 01:46:46.649 a lot of the techniques have helped people who 01:46:46.649 --> 01:46:51.989 are, you know, bigger in stature. But so because 01:46:51.989 --> 01:47:00.329 of the class going really well at FDIC, Aaron 01:47:00.329 --> 01:47:05.069 Heller had people who had taken my class. I had 01:47:05.069 --> 01:47:07.189 known him because at this point I was divorced 01:47:07.189 --> 01:47:09.770 and I was dating somebody in the fire service 01:47:09.770 --> 01:47:13.079 who actually worked for Aaron as well. And so 01:47:13.079 --> 01:47:15.579 we all knew each other already, but somebody 01:47:15.579 --> 01:47:19.260 had like sat in on my class and Aaron wanted 01:47:19.260 --> 01:47:20.979 to give me a chance to teach with Onsen Training 01:47:20.979 --> 01:47:24.300 Associates. So that was, I think my, I think 01:47:24.300 --> 01:47:26.819 I started working for him after three years. 01:47:27.659 --> 01:47:31.739 So really, really early on, which came with a 01:47:31.739 --> 01:47:36.739 lot of judgments with teaching. But I think the 01:47:36.739 --> 01:47:38.619 most important part was trying to stay true to 01:47:38.619 --> 01:47:41.180 myself. I used to always give this lecture before 01:47:41.180 --> 01:47:43.600 I taught. And a lot of the guys are like, stop 01:47:43.600 --> 01:47:45.199 saying that, Jenny, you don't need to do it. 01:47:45.239 --> 01:47:47.739 But I did it anyway. I don't care because I thought 01:47:47.739 --> 01:47:49.619 it was really important to be authentic and honest. 01:47:49.819 --> 01:47:51.640 Every time I taught victim removal or anytime 01:47:51.640 --> 01:47:53.399 I taught something, I would give a disclaimer 01:47:53.399 --> 01:47:55.760 like, hey, I've only been in the fire service 01:47:55.760 --> 01:47:58.260 for, you know, two years, three years, four, 01:47:58.380 --> 01:48:00.859 whatever it was. This is something that I was. 01:48:01.229 --> 01:48:03.689 not good at that I was really passionate about 01:48:03.689 --> 01:48:06.710 that I got training on. I haven't personally 01:48:06.710 --> 01:48:10.350 had a victim that I've saved from a house, you 01:48:10.350 --> 01:48:15.699 know, besides bunnies and dogs, but like, I always 01:48:15.699 --> 01:48:18.500 say that open and honest because I never want 01:48:18.500 --> 01:48:20.399 somebody to come back and be like, who do you 01:48:20.399 --> 01:48:23.140 think you are? And what do you even know? You 01:48:23.140 --> 01:48:24.859 don't have this in this much time. I know that. 01:48:24.899 --> 01:48:27.600 I share that. I have nothing to hide. I'm not 01:48:27.600 --> 01:48:29.420 trying to say I'm better than everybody else 01:48:29.420 --> 01:48:32.979 or that I have so many years of experience. What 01:48:32.979 --> 01:48:35.720 I'm trying to do is say that there's techniques 01:48:35.720 --> 01:48:37.899 and tricks for people who are a little smaller 01:48:37.899 --> 01:48:42.420 that can make this job better. Moving a person 01:48:42.420 --> 01:48:44.180 is a lot different than moving a mannequin. And 01:48:44.180 --> 01:48:46.100 that's something that became also very passionate 01:48:46.100 --> 01:48:48.699 to me when I teach search or I teach VES or victim 01:48:48.699 --> 01:48:51.279 removal. I use live victims because they don't 01:48:51.279 --> 01:48:53.180 move the same way as a mannequin. We always train 01:48:53.180 --> 01:48:56.739 on mannequins. And so, you know, the times have 01:48:56.739 --> 01:48:58.739 changed from when I started teaching. A lot more 01:48:58.739 --> 01:49:02.319 people are using real, real victims versus using 01:49:02.319 --> 01:49:05.199 mannequins. But it makes a big difference with 01:49:05.199 --> 01:49:10.390 your techniques. So. Anyway, Aaron decided to 01:49:10.390 --> 01:49:13.229 give me a test run for teaching with him in Louisiana 01:49:13.229 --> 01:49:18.250 in I think it was 2019. We had a burning the 01:49:18.250 --> 01:49:22.250 bayou conference down there and it went well. 01:49:22.329 --> 01:49:24.729 He asked me to officially join on scene training 01:49:24.729 --> 01:49:28.569 associates and which was really one of the biggest 01:49:28.569 --> 01:49:30.430 blessings that I could have in the fire service, 01:49:30.489 --> 01:49:32.590 because here I am getting to teach for a company 01:49:32.590 --> 01:49:36.890 that has so many experienced firemen from all 01:49:36.890 --> 01:49:39.409 over the country. who are just true gentlemen 01:49:39.409 --> 01:49:43.430 that are really uphold the values of integrity 01:49:43.430 --> 01:49:47.350 and friendship and honesty. And, you know, here 01:49:47.350 --> 01:49:50.270 he is, a guy who is in the textbooks, giving 01:49:50.270 --> 01:49:54.250 me a chance to teach without the ego of, you 01:49:54.250 --> 01:49:55.890 know, what do you know with only two years on 01:49:55.890 --> 01:49:59.369 as a female? You know what I mean? And it really 01:49:59.369 --> 01:50:05.340 was, he really helped build my confidence. like 01:50:05.340 --> 01:50:07.779 truly believed in me before I even did like, 01:50:07.859 --> 01:50:11.180 you know, so it was really, it was really pretty 01:50:11.180 --> 01:50:13.880 amazing. I've been very, very fortunate as far 01:50:13.880 --> 01:50:16.560 as that's concerned. But yeah, I mean, I, I've 01:50:16.560 --> 01:50:18.699 gotten a lot of shit for teaching very early 01:50:18.699 --> 01:50:20.880 on in my career. I've had people send me nasty 01:50:20.880 --> 01:50:24.199 texts. I've been made fun of. I've been talked 01:50:24.199 --> 01:50:26.539 to behind my back. I mean, that goes with anywhere 01:50:26.539 --> 01:50:29.279 in the department. It goes outside of the department. 01:50:30.859 --> 01:50:32.760 you know, people who've been teaching forever. 01:50:32.920 --> 01:50:35.800 And, you know, the thing is, I think what's helped 01:50:35.800 --> 01:50:39.880 is, um, like I said, I always, I always try and 01:50:39.880 --> 01:50:42.420 stay as honest as I can about everything. Um, 01:50:42.560 --> 01:50:46.300 my experience, um, my training, not every, like 01:50:46.300 --> 01:50:48.279 if I learned something from a conference, I say 01:50:48.279 --> 01:50:50.140 that, I don't say that I like came up with this 01:50:50.140 --> 01:50:51.840 on my own. I learned it from people who've come 01:50:51.840 --> 01:50:54.840 before me. I, you know, my class is a culmination 01:50:54.840 --> 01:50:57.060 of a bunch of different people who have taught 01:50:57.060 --> 01:51:01.039 me. Um, And along with things that I've spent 01:51:01.039 --> 01:51:04.560 time trying to figure out. So, you know, that's 01:51:04.560 --> 01:51:08.119 helped whenever I've had the naysayers and the 01:51:08.119 --> 01:51:13.779 bullying or the attitudes. Or, I mean, my boss 01:51:13.779 --> 01:51:16.020 posted that I was going to go teach somewhere 01:51:16.020 --> 01:51:18.920 one time. And some random guy is like, what does 01:51:18.920 --> 01:51:20.560 she know? She doesn't know anything. I don't 01:51:20.560 --> 01:51:24.899 even know him. And it was nice because I didn't 01:51:24.899 --> 01:51:27.520 have to say anything. And things like that don't 01:51:27.520 --> 01:51:29.939 bother me anymore. They used to. You have to 01:51:29.939 --> 01:51:33.220 have thick skin and know who you are. But it 01:51:33.220 --> 01:51:35.140 was just nice because people who had taken my 01:51:35.140 --> 01:51:36.920 class and people who knew me were like, you don't 01:51:36.920 --> 01:51:39.319 know what you're talking about. You know, if 01:51:39.319 --> 01:51:41.739 you knew her, you wouldn't say that. You know 01:51:41.739 --> 01:51:46.060 what I mean? So it's just it's been an experience. 01:51:46.119 --> 01:51:49.460 But I will say going through so many difficulties 01:51:49.460 --> 01:51:54.180 and judgments definitely has made me stronger 01:51:54.180 --> 01:51:58.119 for. uh, who I am as a person, um, accepting 01:51:58.119 --> 01:52:01.600 who I am being myself unapologetically, like, 01:52:01.720 --> 01:52:04.420 you know, there's a lot of judgments and thoughts 01:52:04.420 --> 01:52:06.279 out there. And for people who don't like me, 01:52:06.300 --> 01:52:08.399 that they're entitled to their opinion. And, 01:52:08.460 --> 01:52:11.340 um, it's none of my business what they think. 01:52:11.880 --> 01:52:16.720 So, you know, well, it's interesting because 01:52:16.720 --> 01:52:19.319 I was been thinking recently about some of the, 01:52:19.380 --> 01:52:22.760 again, Insta famous personalities, air quotes 01:52:22.760 --> 01:52:25.750 that you see on social media. And I've had that 01:52:25.750 --> 01:52:28.210 thought is that, you know, there's a lot of people 01:52:28.210 --> 01:52:30.050 out there that don't have very much time on, 01:52:30.130 --> 01:52:32.710 but it's also all about them. Here's me training 01:52:32.710 --> 01:52:34.529 again. Here's me forcing a door again. Here's 01:52:34.529 --> 01:52:36.949 me again, duck walking for the 15th time this 01:52:36.949 --> 01:52:39.609 month. Right. And what's the difference between 01:52:39.609 --> 01:52:41.489 what you've just talked about and many other 01:52:41.489 --> 01:52:43.270 people out there that are doing great things 01:52:43.270 --> 01:52:44.970 that don't have a lot of time on this humility. 01:52:45.250 --> 01:52:47.930 And it's the same thing as the 30 year, you know, 01:52:47.930 --> 01:52:53.039 FDNY rescue guy, Al. It's humility. And I've 01:52:53.039 --> 01:52:54.819 had this. I've gone to the Florida State College 01:52:54.819 --> 01:52:56.699 and I was working for Reedy Creek, my last department. 01:52:56.880 --> 01:52:59.460 Oh, do they put wints on your pillows there? 01:52:59.800 --> 01:53:03.340 And then four or five days into it, you're watching 01:53:03.340 --> 01:53:06.060 them fumble fuck stuff and you're doing what 01:53:06.060 --> 01:53:07.979 you're supposed to be doing. And the same at 01:53:07.979 --> 01:53:09.840 the Orlando Fire Conference when we did VES with 01:53:09.840 --> 01:53:11.520 Eric Wheaton. And you're going in there and you're 01:53:11.520 --> 01:53:13.979 snatching dummies out. And it's like, yeah, because 01:53:13.979 --> 01:53:16.810 you're not defined by the thing. You're defined 01:53:16.810 --> 01:53:18.710 by who you are. And I think that one of the things 01:53:18.710 --> 01:53:20.310 that really kills me is like the kind of, you 01:53:20.310 --> 01:53:22.350 know, the firefighter of the year and all that. 01:53:23.029 --> 01:53:25.409 There is no competition in the fire. So the only 01:53:25.409 --> 01:53:28.270 person you're competing with is you. There is 01:53:28.270 --> 01:53:31.010 no best firefighter because that guy might be 01:53:31.010 --> 01:53:32.869 great at ropes and knots, but absolutely shit 01:53:32.869 --> 01:53:35.949 with paramedicine. So, you know, like you said, 01:53:35.989 --> 01:53:38.369 we are a Swiss army knife and we can't be phenomenal 01:53:38.369 --> 01:53:41.170 at all the things. So having the humility to 01:53:41.170 --> 01:53:43.149 understand that if you just focus on yourself. 01:53:43.920 --> 01:53:46.460 And teach when you, you know, have the ability 01:53:46.460 --> 01:53:48.859 to teach and you've found that you have a good 01:53:48.859 --> 01:53:51.399 grasp of some areas and then keep learning from 01:53:51.399 --> 01:53:53.920 other people that are either more well, excuse 01:53:53.920 --> 01:53:56.359 me, more well -versed in that same thing or well 01:53:56.359 --> 01:53:58.819 -versed in other areas. That's the, you know, 01:53:58.819 --> 01:54:01.819 rising tide lifts all ships. But this ego, oh, 01:54:02.180 --> 01:54:04.579 I'm from this department. Dude, you do the same 01:54:04.579 --> 01:54:07.100 fucking job that everyone else. Let that shit 01:54:07.100 --> 01:54:09.079 go. Oh, county is better than city. City is better 01:54:09.079 --> 01:54:12.359 than county. Like, no. You are all doing the 01:54:12.359 --> 01:54:14.479 same job. The only difference is if you take 01:54:14.479 --> 01:54:16.779 your training seriously, you take your fitness 01:54:16.779 --> 01:54:18.979 seriously, your rest and recovery, your ability 01:54:18.979 --> 01:54:21.279 to cook a decent meal in the firehouse, your 01:54:21.279 --> 01:54:23.760 ability to shut up and listen sometimes, that 01:54:23.760 --> 01:54:25.800 is what's going to make you a great firefighter. 01:54:25.800 --> 01:54:29.539 But your tenure, for example, is not a linear 01:54:29.539 --> 01:54:31.560 relationship to being a good firefighter because 01:54:31.560 --> 01:54:34.239 there are good examples of people with 25 years 01:54:34.239 --> 01:54:37.050 on that are shit. in the fire service. And there 01:54:37.050 --> 01:54:40.029 are examples of great probies. So it's humility 01:54:40.029 --> 01:54:43.770 is everything, every rank, you know, every special 01:54:43.770 --> 01:54:46.210 ops group, whatever it is, the moment you think 01:54:46.210 --> 01:54:48.949 you are better than someone else, you've already 01:54:48.949 --> 01:54:52.250 lost the fight. Absolutely. And I think you said 01:54:52.250 --> 01:54:53.750 something that's really important there. Like, 01:54:53.750 --> 01:54:55.789 I think there's a big difference between seniority 01:54:55.789 --> 01:54:58.489 and the senior man, right? Like there, you have 01:54:58.489 --> 01:55:00.329 a good, if you have a good senior man, who's 01:55:00.329 --> 01:55:02.670 been on the job, who's willing to teach, who 01:55:02.670 --> 01:55:05.300 knows that his you know, his shit inside and 01:55:05.300 --> 01:55:08.720 out that that's, that's what isn't is important 01:55:08.720 --> 01:55:10.920 versus the amount of years you have on, because 01:55:10.920 --> 01:55:13.239 I've seen a lot of people who have spent no time 01:55:13.239 --> 01:55:16.979 training and you know, they have tons of years 01:55:16.979 --> 01:55:18.659 in the fire service, but what are they doing 01:55:18.659 --> 01:55:23.520 about it? And, you know, it's, there's that balance 01:55:23.520 --> 01:55:25.619 of like having things outside the fire service, 01:55:25.640 --> 01:55:27.880 but it all in all, when you're doing your job 01:55:27.880 --> 01:55:29.260 and you've been doing it this long, you should 01:55:29.260 --> 01:55:31.619 be one of the better people at the job. Right. 01:55:31.800 --> 01:55:34.729 Like. you got 20 years on, you should be the 01:55:34.729 --> 01:55:37.350 best person on your crew. Right. Like that's, 01:55:37.350 --> 01:55:38.689 it goes without saying, but that's not always 01:55:38.689 --> 01:55:43.989 the case. Right. And you know, I, I, I have learned, 01:55:44.050 --> 01:55:46.569 I've learned from so many different people that 01:55:46.569 --> 01:55:53.270 I just. you know for me the the egotism and issues 01:55:53.270 --> 01:55:56.010 in the fire service really if we could like set 01:55:56.010 --> 01:55:57.850 that aside there's so many things we you could 01:55:57.850 --> 01:55:59.850 just be learning all the time from people and 01:55:59.850 --> 01:56:02.010 like um becoming a better version of yourself 01:56:02.010 --> 01:56:04.989 like we we care more about what what what is 01:56:04.989 --> 01:56:07.630 presented sometimes than the actual content like 01:56:07.630 --> 01:56:10.430 who's presenting versus the content or you know 01:56:10.430 --> 01:56:15.439 i it's It's something that I've always been very 01:56:15.439 --> 01:56:17.699 passionate about. Well, one, because I got given 01:56:17.699 --> 01:56:20.680 an opportunity early, which which was a difficult 01:56:20.680 --> 01:56:23.220 it was a difficult thing to navigate. Like everyone's 01:56:23.220 --> 01:56:25.279 like, oh, you know, you're so fortunate. But 01:56:25.279 --> 01:56:28.779 also it was it wasn't like an easy decision to 01:56:28.779 --> 01:56:31.939 decide to teach early. Right. I knew I was going 01:56:31.939 --> 01:56:34.420 to get shit for it. I knew that I was going to 01:56:34.420 --> 01:56:36.140 have a hard time. I knew that I was going to 01:56:36.140 --> 01:56:37.960 be judged. I knew a lot of people were going 01:56:37.960 --> 01:56:40.079 to talk behind my back. And, you know, that's 01:56:40.079 --> 01:56:43.739 why it's. why, why I think what Mike told me 01:56:43.739 --> 01:56:46.039 was so important. Like what's, what's my overall 01:56:46.039 --> 01:56:49.220 goal? Is it to help people? Okay. Can you do 01:56:49.220 --> 01:56:50.819 that? Are you going to do that? Okay. Well then 01:56:50.819 --> 01:56:52.920 if you're doing things for the right reasons, 01:56:53.020 --> 01:56:56.279 then just don't worry about what people think, 01:56:56.420 --> 01:57:00.119 you know, and yeah, you can, you can absolutely 01:57:00.119 --> 01:57:02.319 learn from anyone. I've learned lots of things 01:57:02.319 --> 01:57:04.779 from brand new guys versus or guys that have, 01:57:04.840 --> 01:57:10.939 you know, from anyone, you know, so. Yeah, 100%. 01:57:10.939 --> 01:57:13.380 I think this is the thing. When you see yourself 01:57:13.380 --> 01:57:16.800 as a fire service personality, then again, you're 01:57:16.800 --> 01:57:20.680 missing the point. There has been no fire scene. 01:57:20.739 --> 01:57:22.939 I'll give you a perfect example. There's a story 01:57:22.939 --> 01:57:25.000 recently came out of these Texas floods where 01:57:25.000 --> 01:57:27.859 this power rescue man made a bunch of saves, 01:57:27.979 --> 01:57:31.779 and they interviewed him. And I was looking at 01:57:31.779 --> 01:57:34.199 this going, that guy is a rock star, but you 01:57:34.199 --> 01:57:36.229 know there was a cable, right? And at the top 01:57:36.229 --> 01:57:38.949 of the cable was another guy and a pilot and 01:57:38.949 --> 01:57:40.850 then the mechanics for that and the people, you 01:57:40.850 --> 01:57:43.270 know what I mean? It's not just a person. It's 01:57:43.270 --> 01:57:45.750 the same with us. I'll never forget being in 01:57:45.750 --> 01:57:47.310 the Orlando fire conference a few years ago. 01:57:47.350 --> 01:57:49.989 And one of these guys presenting one of these 01:57:49.989 --> 01:57:53.229 fire service personalities basically screamed 01:57:53.229 --> 01:57:55.649 at us for like an hour or 90 minutes about being 01:57:55.649 --> 01:57:57.760 into the job. And I remember looking around going, 01:57:57.859 --> 01:58:00.500 we're at a fucking fire conference. I think everyone 01:58:00.500 --> 01:58:02.500 here is into the job. Can we move on? Everyone's 01:58:02.500 --> 01:58:05.060 bought in. We're here. And it's the kind of bullshit. 01:58:05.079 --> 01:58:07.500 So just like you said, it's not who's talking, 01:58:07.600 --> 01:58:09.920 it's what's being said. And it might have been 01:58:09.920 --> 01:58:11.699 way more compelling to have someone with two 01:58:11.699 --> 01:58:15.060 years on in that particular instance that actually 01:58:15.060 --> 01:58:16.840 was going to bring something new to the table 01:58:16.840 --> 01:58:18.680 than the same old shit that you've heard from 01:58:18.680 --> 01:58:21.699 some of these people for like 15, 20 years. So, 01:58:21.720 --> 01:58:24.140 you know, again, it just circles around the humility. 01:58:24.279 --> 01:58:26.060 All these people have value. I'm not saying they 01:58:26.060 --> 01:58:28.420 don't. But the moment that you become a prima 01:58:28.420 --> 01:58:30.859 donna in the fire service, an organization that's 01:58:30.859 --> 01:58:32.819 supposed to be selfless, where you're focusing 01:58:32.819 --> 01:58:36.000 on the people that we serve, then there's a huge 01:58:36.000 --> 01:58:37.880 disconnect there. And I think this is where I've 01:58:37.880 --> 01:58:39.539 had so much resistance because there's a lot 01:58:39.539 --> 01:58:41.819 of people that are far more bought in with the 01:58:41.819 --> 01:58:43.840 identity of being a firefighter than actually 01:58:43.840 --> 01:58:47.159 what it means to be a firefighter. A hundred 01:58:47.159 --> 01:58:53.079 percent. I mean, I think that's. You know, I 01:58:53.079 --> 01:58:55.640 think I think it can fluctuate, too. I think 01:58:55.640 --> 01:58:57.939 like, you know, because I teach fire academy 01:58:57.939 --> 01:59:01.039 and a lot of the kids coming in, they're so excited. 01:59:01.180 --> 01:59:05.779 Right. They're so excited. And, you know, I don't 01:59:05.779 --> 01:59:07.340 want to steal their joy. I don't want anybody 01:59:07.340 --> 01:59:09.680 to steal their joy. And then they get on to cruise 01:59:09.680 --> 01:59:11.699 and they get with disgruntled people and the 01:59:11.699 --> 01:59:15.079 attitude changes. And, you know, you have people 01:59:15.079 --> 01:59:18.619 that that stay. excited for the job and then 01:59:18.619 --> 01:59:20.760 you have people that kind of follow in with guys 01:59:20.760 --> 01:59:23.380 that are kind of burnt out and you know it's 01:59:23.380 --> 01:59:27.020 a fluctuation and and i think that it's it's 01:59:27.020 --> 01:59:31.600 not inhuman to um to change your your viewpoints 01:59:31.600 --> 01:59:33.479 multiple times throughout your career there's 01:59:33.479 --> 01:59:35.680 been times where i have not wanted to be here 01:59:35.680 --> 01:59:38.779 um i i was going to quit the fire service a few 01:59:38.779 --> 01:59:43.020 years ago um i was just over everything i was 01:59:43.020 --> 01:59:47.430 i was really having a hard time and um And at 01:59:47.430 --> 01:59:51.989 that point, I didn't want to train. I didn't 01:59:51.989 --> 01:59:53.590 want to do a lot of things. And it wasn't because 01:59:53.590 --> 01:59:55.789 I didn't want to train. It was just because I 01:59:55.789 --> 01:59:57.210 wasn't in the right mental state. I was having 01:59:57.210 --> 02:00:02.069 some issues with depression and feeling a purpose 02:00:02.069 --> 02:00:05.270 and motivation for the job and for any of it. 02:00:06.119 --> 02:00:09.539 I was drinking a little bit more on a lot more 02:00:09.539 --> 02:00:12.800 on my days off. I basically would like eat ice 02:00:12.800 --> 02:00:15.159 cream, watch Grey's Anatomy and make a mimosa 02:00:15.159 --> 02:00:17.439 at like 10 in the morning. And that was that. 02:00:17.479 --> 02:00:19.779 I would still do everything. I was I was functioning. 02:00:19.899 --> 02:00:22.060 I was teaching, but I was going through a really 02:00:22.060 --> 02:00:27.039 hard time. And I think that the reason I'm bringing 02:00:27.039 --> 02:00:30.199 it up as far as like there's different stages 02:00:30.199 --> 02:00:33.939 you go in as a fireman. You might start out gung 02:00:33.939 --> 02:00:37.050 ho and then. And then and stay that way for a 02:00:37.050 --> 02:00:39.369 while or you might get burnt out. And then that 02:00:39.369 --> 02:00:41.390 affects all the people around you. It affects 02:00:41.390 --> 02:00:44.770 yourself. And then trying to find your way back. 02:00:44.930 --> 02:00:47.670 I don't think it's an uncommon story. So I think 02:00:47.670 --> 02:00:53.050 a lot of firemen that, you know, are not as excited 02:00:53.050 --> 02:00:55.729 or don't want to train as much. They may have 02:00:55.729 --> 02:00:59.130 lost some of their purpose or lost some of themselves 02:00:59.130 --> 02:01:03.560 within this job. I think there's always a way 02:01:03.560 --> 02:01:06.300 to come back. And it helps, I think, being in 02:01:06.300 --> 02:01:09.380 a really good environment. My crew, I love my 02:01:09.380 --> 02:01:15.079 crew. I love my officer. I have the greatest 02:01:15.079 --> 02:01:18.899 crew. I truly do. And it's not just because I 02:01:18.899 --> 02:01:21.100 think they're great firemen. It's because of 02:01:21.100 --> 02:01:24.279 who they are. And having that kind of support 02:01:24.279 --> 02:01:27.060 has helped me learn to love the fire service 02:01:27.060 --> 02:01:28.920 again when there was a time where I just didn't 02:01:28.920 --> 02:01:30.640 want anything to do with it anymore. You know 02:01:30.640 --> 02:01:33.750 what I mean? Um, yeah, I think there's a lot 02:01:33.750 --> 02:01:36.770 of guys in the fire service who, who want to 02:01:36.770 --> 02:01:38.909 spend more time preaching about the job, but 02:01:38.909 --> 02:01:43.989 yeah, I mean, I think it's human to go through 02:01:43.989 --> 02:01:46.270 phases where you're not as excited, but I think 02:01:46.270 --> 02:01:49.329 it's also really important to not to try for 02:01:49.329 --> 02:01:51.229 the most part. I mean, nobody's perfect and we 02:01:51.229 --> 02:01:52.989 all have our days and we live at the firehouse. 02:01:53.029 --> 02:01:56.229 So you're not always on, right? Like you're not 02:01:56.229 --> 02:01:59.189 always like ready to be that role model, but 02:01:59.189 --> 02:02:01.949 I think it's important to try and keep. the newer 02:02:01.949 --> 02:02:05.850 people, um, like motivated and not steal their 02:02:05.850 --> 02:02:08.189 joy. And if they want to train, you train. I 02:02:08.189 --> 02:02:10.649 have, I had a, I made a rule a long time ago 02:02:10.649 --> 02:02:15.289 that if somebody, um, like a newer person comes 02:02:15.289 --> 02:02:18.609 up to me and asks me to train, I never say no, 02:02:18.770 --> 02:02:21.430 even if I'm tired or I'm not in the mood, I always 02:02:21.430 --> 02:02:23.850 say yes. And there's been days that I have not 02:02:23.850 --> 02:02:26.350 wanted to, I'm, I'm exhausted. And, you know, 02:02:26.369 --> 02:02:30.880 it's just finding ways that. you can kind of 02:02:30.880 --> 02:02:34.140 keep thriving in a job that is difficult to always 02:02:34.140 --> 02:02:37.260 stay at the task at hand and stay motivated, 02:02:37.279 --> 02:02:39.979 especially with so many difficulties with personalities 02:02:39.979 --> 02:02:43.920 or administrative issues or crew issues or life 02:02:43.920 --> 02:02:46.680 issues. It really is hard to stay in that mode 02:02:46.680 --> 02:02:52.539 all the time, right? So, I mean. Yeah, I agree. 02:02:52.739 --> 02:02:54.979 I think this is going back to the work week. 02:02:55.060 --> 02:02:58.810 I mean, if you have a... more well -rested fire 02:02:58.810 --> 02:03:01.649 department where they all not only go home when 02:03:01.649 --> 02:03:03.850 they were supposed to but they get one extra 02:03:03.850 --> 02:03:06.869 day between shifts now you you know you're not 02:03:06.869 --> 02:03:08.850 only have they got rest and recovery so they're 02:03:08.850 --> 02:03:12.000 physically able to to recover more because i 02:03:12.000 --> 02:03:13.920 mean if you look at the physiology of sleep deprivation 02:03:13.920 --> 02:03:16.939 it causes obesity hypertension diabetes all these 02:03:16.939 --> 02:03:19.359 things that are breaking our people down but 02:03:19.359 --> 02:03:21.539 then even the relationships the shame and guilt 02:03:21.539 --> 02:03:23.720 of not being able to go to your kids function 02:03:23.720 --> 02:03:25.880 that you promise them to i mean that's compounding 02:03:25.880 --> 02:03:29.220 as well so i think you know this this whole kind 02:03:29.220 --> 02:03:30.819 of revolution that we're starting to see here 02:03:30.819 --> 02:03:32.779 in florida and then you add some fitness standards 02:03:32.779 --> 02:03:35.479 into it's then going to raise the bar and the 02:03:35.479 --> 02:03:38.340 motivation level will rise up but we've also 02:03:38.340 --> 02:03:41.960 got to stop idolizing the air quotes, salty guy 02:03:41.960 --> 02:03:44.560 and reframe it. Like, no, that's not how we're 02:03:44.560 --> 02:03:47.100 supposed to be. Being pissed off and rude to 02:03:47.100 --> 02:03:49.720 the patients is not salty. It's being a dick. 02:03:49.779 --> 02:03:52.539 And the person going with that, if they were 02:03:52.539 --> 02:03:55.060 super nice when they got hired, then let's have 02:03:55.060 --> 02:03:56.760 this discussion. Obviously, they're going through 02:03:56.760 --> 02:03:58.560 some things. So let's look at that with compassion 02:03:58.560 --> 02:04:01.819 and empathy. But we've got to stop revering those 02:04:01.819 --> 02:04:03.680 people because they're not the ones we should 02:04:03.680 --> 02:04:05.659 be copying. The Al Benjamins are the ones that 02:04:05.659 --> 02:04:08.069 we should be copying. But like you said, also 02:04:08.069 --> 02:04:10.729 understanding that undulation 100%, you're not 02:04:10.729 --> 02:04:13.029 always going to be the spark plug in the fire 02:04:13.029 --> 02:04:15.369 station that day. But having your finger on the 02:04:15.369 --> 02:04:18.609 pulse, maybe if Jenny has been on the downslope 02:04:18.609 --> 02:04:20.489 for a while now, maybe we should check in on 02:04:20.489 --> 02:04:24.970 Jenny. Yeah, absolutely. Touching on that then, 02:04:25.090 --> 02:04:27.890 what was the lowest kind of point that you found 02:04:27.890 --> 02:04:29.970 yourself? And then what were the tools you used 02:04:29.970 --> 02:04:35.529 to pull yourself out of that hole? A few years 02:04:35.529 --> 02:04:39.609 ago, I went through I was dating somebody who 02:04:39.609 --> 02:04:41.510 is who's another fireman. And I told him that 02:04:41.510 --> 02:04:45.390 he might come up in this podcast. And he's very 02:04:45.390 --> 02:04:47.170 aware. And we're friends now. Everything's good. 02:04:47.310 --> 02:04:50.390 But I was it was a very unhealthy relationship. 02:04:51.180 --> 02:04:53.539 Um, even though we were both gung ho for the 02:04:53.539 --> 02:04:56.079 fire service, um, everyone knew it was an unhealthy 02:04:56.079 --> 02:05:00.180 relationship. Um, so we ended up being at the 02:05:00.180 --> 02:05:02.119 same firehouse. We were both on the special ops 02:05:02.119 --> 02:05:04.460 team, but different, different, uh, shifts, different 02:05:04.460 --> 02:05:09.100 crews. Um, and, uh, we ended up going through 02:05:09.100 --> 02:05:12.779 a breakup, um, which was really difficult because, 02:05:12.859 --> 02:05:19.039 you know, it was dirty, you know, you, you like 02:05:19.039 --> 02:05:21.810 going through a breakup. While working in the 02:05:21.810 --> 02:05:24.930 same department, the same firehouse, it was very, 02:05:25.170 --> 02:05:29.329 very messy. As far as dealing with things, he 02:05:29.329 --> 02:05:35.050 ended up going to Shatterproof for a little while 02:05:35.050 --> 02:05:37.909 to work on some things. But I kind of didn't 02:05:37.909 --> 02:05:41.130 say anything. I was going through a really difficult 02:05:41.130 --> 02:05:43.109 time, but there was a lot of attention towards 02:05:43.109 --> 02:05:47.829 him. But I was really, I was really struggling 02:05:47.829 --> 02:05:50.850 mentally. And on top of it, I wasn't really thriving 02:05:50.850 --> 02:05:54.329 in the environment I was with at work. It just, 02:05:54.350 --> 02:05:57.949 things could have been a lot better. I kept trying 02:05:57.949 --> 02:06:00.130 to push and make things work and they weren't. 02:06:00.130 --> 02:06:03.130 And I wasn't happy. And I had a lot going on 02:06:03.130 --> 02:06:08.050 where, you know, mentally and emotionally because 02:06:08.050 --> 02:06:10.789 of this breakup, it was very physically strenuous 02:06:10.789 --> 02:06:17.050 and not good for my health. And then I got, I 02:06:17.050 --> 02:06:19.510 had a few bad calls. I had a lot of stuff going 02:06:19.510 --> 02:06:23.210 on in my personal life. Besides that, I was having 02:06:23.210 --> 02:06:29.670 financial issues. I had somebody who came, you 02:06:29.670 --> 02:06:33.630 know, came and knocked on my door to help. You 02:06:33.630 --> 02:06:36.329 know, there was just weird things that were going 02:06:36.329 --> 02:06:40.409 on that it was a lot all at once. Um, I was on 02:06:40.409 --> 02:06:42.369 the combat challenge team still. I was on the 02:06:42.369 --> 02:06:44.430 ops team. I was trying to keep everything afloat. 02:06:44.470 --> 02:06:48.090 I was teaching and I just, I like broke and I 02:06:48.090 --> 02:06:54.170 just wasn't doing well. Um, and, uh, so, and 02:06:54.170 --> 02:06:58.329 I think some people knew, but like, I didn't 02:06:58.329 --> 02:07:00.350 want to draw attention. I just felt like my personal 02:07:00.350 --> 02:07:02.409 life and everything, she kept separate from work, 02:07:02.449 --> 02:07:05.050 but, but also because there was so much attention. 02:07:05.640 --> 02:07:07.359 going on with my ex. I just wanted everything 02:07:07.359 --> 02:07:09.420 to be, I just wanted to do my job. I just wanted 02:07:09.420 --> 02:07:13.180 to be left alone. And I just was not okay. I 02:07:13.180 --> 02:07:16.520 wasn't okay. I was going through just like a 02:07:16.520 --> 02:07:21.659 few different toxic environments. And I was done. 02:07:21.880 --> 02:07:24.880 I was severely depressed. I was looking for jobs 02:07:24.880 --> 02:07:27.779 outside the fire service. I was ready to leave. 02:07:28.640 --> 02:07:31.779 That's when I broke out into, not too much longer, 02:07:31.840 --> 02:07:35.069 I broke out into the hives. Um, and, and basically 02:07:35.069 --> 02:07:37.289 I, um, I couldn't, I just couldn't get out of 02:07:37.289 --> 02:07:40.609 this funk. I was kind of like, um, maybe there 02:07:40.609 --> 02:07:43.329 was a part of me that was feeling like a victim, 02:07:43.369 --> 02:07:46.729 like, um, oh, I, I had had all these things happen 02:07:46.729 --> 02:07:51.649 to me. Um, you know, I, it's not my fault that 02:07:51.649 --> 02:07:54.869 I'm depressed. I'm just kind of stuck. Um, so. 02:07:55.920 --> 02:08:00.699 It actually, I basically got tired. I broke out 02:08:00.699 --> 02:08:03.159 in the hives. I hurt my back doing the combat 02:08:03.159 --> 02:08:05.600 challenge. My first time doing an individual 02:08:05.600 --> 02:08:08.079 in Indianapolis, which was super humiliating 02:08:08.079 --> 02:08:10.579 for me because one, I teach a class on victim 02:08:10.579 --> 02:08:12.880 removal and I messed up on the dummy portion 02:08:12.880 --> 02:08:15.420 of the combat challenge in front of everyone. 02:08:15.479 --> 02:08:18.640 And it was broadcasted and I had hives the whole 02:08:18.640 --> 02:08:21.979 week before. I was feeling terrible. I hurt my 02:08:21.979 --> 02:08:24.550 back and I didn't say anything for. a couple 02:08:24.550 --> 02:08:28.630 of weeks, I was in severe pain and I was just 02:08:28.630 --> 02:08:31.770 like, that's it. Something's got to change. And 02:08:31.770 --> 02:08:35.250 I'd already been for years listening to some 02:08:35.250 --> 02:08:38.430 podcasts. I listened to a functional medicine 02:08:38.430 --> 02:08:40.229 podcast. I started listening to that one during 02:08:40.229 --> 02:08:47.350 COVID with Dr. Mark Hyman. And there, I, I, so 02:08:47.350 --> 02:08:49.670 I was listening to things to kind of help try 02:08:49.670 --> 02:08:54.930 and shift my mind. I got a new therapist. I was 02:08:54.930 --> 02:08:57.710 diagnosed with ADHD a long time ago, which I 02:08:57.710 --> 02:09:01.029 now think is kind of more of a symptom of a different 02:09:01.029 --> 02:09:03.930 root cause, health, lifestyle. But at the time, 02:09:03.949 --> 02:09:06.590 it was definitely contributing to my issues. 02:09:06.630 --> 02:09:08.510 And my therapist recommended I go back on my 02:09:08.510 --> 02:09:12.250 ADHD medication for a short period of time, which 02:09:12.250 --> 02:09:16.569 there are reasons for medications. And that kind 02:09:16.569 --> 02:09:18.909 of helped go over the hump of accomplishing things. 02:09:19.010 --> 02:09:20.750 Like everything felt like a mountain. It felt 02:09:20.750 --> 02:09:22.250 like if I had to send an email, it was like I 02:09:22.250 --> 02:09:24.220 was climbing a mountain. Everything felt horrible. 02:09:24.680 --> 02:09:28.060 And so I went on my medication. I got my, I had 02:09:28.060 --> 02:09:30.359 a good therapist. I always had stayed working 02:09:30.359 --> 02:09:32.100 out. That was something I do. I'd go work out 02:09:32.100 --> 02:09:34.279 and then I'd go home and drink. It was just like, 02:09:34.300 --> 02:09:39.979 you know, somehow I'd stay working out. But I 02:09:39.979 --> 02:09:43.039 decided things need to change. And one of the, 02:09:43.039 --> 02:09:46.000 one of the podcasts I listened to was actually 02:09:46.000 --> 02:09:49.140 Mark Hyman. He interviews a lot of people, a 02:09:49.140 --> 02:09:52.000 lot of. medical professionals and different specialists 02:09:52.000 --> 02:09:54.619 um and he ended up interviewing dave asprey i 02:09:54.619 --> 02:09:55.920 don't know if you know who he is he's like a 02:09:55.920 --> 02:09:59.920 biohacker yes um but a lot of people are like 02:09:59.920 --> 02:10:01.720 oh he's kind of crazy or he's awesome i don't 02:10:01.720 --> 02:10:03.439 there's lots of different views on him i have 02:10:03.439 --> 02:10:08.340 i have a lot of um you know I kind of extrapolate 02:10:08.340 --> 02:10:10.619 the things that I really enjoy about what he 02:10:10.619 --> 02:10:14.539 teaches or tries to go over. But so when he interviewed 02:10:14.539 --> 02:10:16.539 him, there was a lot of things that I took in 02:10:16.539 --> 02:10:18.600 and actually changed in my life because of this 02:10:18.600 --> 02:10:21.239 interview, as far as taking electrolytes in the 02:10:21.239 --> 02:10:24.960 morning, doing face plunges. But he spent like 02:10:24.960 --> 02:10:28.399 five minutes on part of biohacking is being able 02:10:28.399 --> 02:10:31.819 to like have a good state of mind, which means 02:10:31.819 --> 02:10:34.140 that you need to work on the F word, which is 02:10:34.140 --> 02:10:38.240 forgiveness, right? Learning to forgive. people 02:10:38.240 --> 02:10:41.380 or things in your life that have happened. But 02:10:41.380 --> 02:10:43.539 not just like, because like, for example, I wanted 02:10:43.539 --> 02:10:46.560 to forgive things that went on with my ex. And 02:10:46.560 --> 02:10:49.260 I would say that I would, that I had forgiven. 02:10:49.340 --> 02:10:52.199 But the truth is, I was still triggered and upset 02:10:52.199 --> 02:10:53.859 when I thought about it. And that's not true 02:10:53.859 --> 02:10:55.920 forgiveness. And forgiveness more than anything 02:10:55.920 --> 02:10:58.119 is for yourself, right? And sometimes you need 02:10:58.119 --> 02:11:00.039 to forgive yourself to be able to move on in 02:11:00.039 --> 02:11:03.340 life. So like, he went over this. It was like 02:11:03.340 --> 02:11:06.039 five minutes of this way to truly forgive someone. 02:11:06.159 --> 02:11:10.420 And it completely changed my life. I had a whole 02:11:10.420 --> 02:11:13.300 new perspective on the way that I was going to 02:11:13.300 --> 02:11:19.079 move along going forward. And it made me just 02:11:19.079 --> 02:11:23.060 appreciate these difficult times I've been through. 02:11:23.460 --> 02:11:26.680 Because I think you truly gain so much in life 02:11:26.680 --> 02:11:28.920 from your transgressions, from your difficulties, 02:11:28.960 --> 02:11:32.869 like the trauma you say as a child. Once that 02:11:32.869 --> 02:11:35.369 was able to process and happen, I started doing 02:11:35.369 --> 02:11:38.789 a little better. I decided that luckily one of 02:11:38.789 --> 02:11:42.369 my girlfriends from college, she called me up 02:11:42.369 --> 02:11:43.970 and she's like, can we please get the fuck out 02:11:43.970 --> 02:11:45.710 of town? She's a doctor now because all my friends 02:11:45.710 --> 02:11:47.189 from college are doctors because they actually 02:11:47.189 --> 02:11:51.550 stayed on their path. But she's like, can we 02:11:51.550 --> 02:11:53.829 go on a surf trip, please? And I was like, yes. 02:11:54.189 --> 02:11:56.890 And so I decided I had listened to the podcast. 02:11:57.659 --> 02:12:00.739 My back was hurt. I was, I decided after I get 02:12:00.739 --> 02:12:03.859 back from, we went to Costa Rica, I decided I 02:12:03.859 --> 02:12:06.920 was going to do 75 hard when I got back from 02:12:06.920 --> 02:12:10.119 Costa Rica. So I, but before that, I just decided 02:12:10.119 --> 02:12:13.600 I'm going to be happier. Right. Like, I know 02:12:13.600 --> 02:12:16.699 that sounds kind of stupid to decide to be happier, 02:12:16.819 --> 02:12:20.699 but like. I truly think the more time you spend 02:12:20.699 --> 02:12:23.140 deciding to be happy and smiling, eventually 02:12:23.140 --> 02:12:24.939 your body doesn't know the difference between 02:12:24.939 --> 02:12:27.420 you faking it and you doing it. And it made a 02:12:27.420 --> 02:12:30.060 big difference. I decided if I was given a difficult 02:12:30.060 --> 02:12:34.359 situation, I would just laugh instead of spend 02:12:34.359 --> 02:12:37.859 time stressing and crying about it. So me and 02:12:37.859 --> 02:12:40.239 my girlfriend, we took off to Costa Rica. We 02:12:40.239 --> 02:12:42.819 surfed, we drank tea, we did yoga. We laid on 02:12:42.819 --> 02:12:44.720 the beach, we journal, we read, we read books. 02:12:44.840 --> 02:12:46.949 And it was like. the best reset I could have 02:12:46.949 --> 02:12:51.550 had. And then when I came back, I did 75 hard, 02:12:51.689 --> 02:12:54.770 which I'm sure you know what that is. Yeah. Yeah. 02:12:54.829 --> 02:12:56.189 You can tell people listening if they haven't 02:12:56.189 --> 02:13:00.970 heard it though. Okay. So it's 75 days of two 02:13:00.970 --> 02:13:03.949 workouts a day. One has to be outside 45 minutes 02:13:03.949 --> 02:13:07.050 each. You drink a gallon of water a day. You 02:13:07.050 --> 02:13:09.390 have to pick a diet and stick to it. I just chose. 02:13:10.039 --> 02:13:13.520 to not eat inflammatory gluten or dairy, basically, 02:13:13.520 --> 02:13:15.720 because it causes a lot of inflammation in the 02:13:15.720 --> 02:13:20.640 body. What else? You have to read 10 pages of 02:13:20.640 --> 02:13:22.560 a nonfiction book and you don't drink alcohol. 02:13:22.819 --> 02:13:28.140 So you do that for 75 days. And that was probably 02:13:28.140 --> 02:13:31.439 the longest time I'd gone without drinking since 02:13:31.439 --> 02:13:34.939 I was a kid. And on top of that, like, which 02:13:34.939 --> 02:13:36.939 I thought I was going to have a hard time doing, 02:13:36.979 --> 02:13:39.720 but the truth is I had never felt better. And 02:13:39.720 --> 02:13:42.739 so truly fixing my mental health was taking care 02:13:42.739 --> 02:13:45.659 of my body. It was a lot of things, right? It 02:13:45.659 --> 02:13:50.739 was finding people to help me emotionally and 02:13:50.739 --> 02:13:54.720 mentally, but then also changing my diet, getting 02:13:54.720 --> 02:13:57.380 some sun. It was when going on the surf trip 02:13:57.380 --> 02:14:00.279 was me getting back to. my passion before the 02:14:00.279 --> 02:14:02.000 fire service. So when I got, when I joined the 02:14:02.000 --> 02:14:05.020 fire service, I basically quit surfing, um, which 02:14:05.020 --> 02:14:08.420 kind of sucks because it's such a, um, it's so 02:14:08.420 --> 02:14:12.579 good for the soul. Um, but, uh, so I went back 02:14:12.579 --> 02:14:14.840 on this surf trip and it just reignited my love 02:14:14.840 --> 02:14:18.979 for surfing. Um, I was able to just. I decided 02:14:18.979 --> 02:14:21.199 I wasn't going to think about anything work related. 02:14:21.300 --> 02:14:22.979 I didn't want to talk to anybody about work. 02:14:23.039 --> 02:14:24.579 I didn't want to think about work. I went with 02:14:24.579 --> 02:14:26.000 a friend from college. It was like the first 02:14:26.000 --> 02:14:27.619 trip I had taken in forever. That wasn't with 02:14:27.619 --> 02:14:30.720 a fireman of some sort, you know, like for a 02:14:30.720 --> 02:14:32.920 fire conference or a training. It was just to 02:14:32.920 --> 02:14:39.239 like go. And I came back. I did 75 hard, which 02:14:39.239 --> 02:14:43.020 was amazing. I decided that I needed to change 02:14:43.020 --> 02:14:46.859 my environment. And, you know, I just. I wasn't 02:14:46.859 --> 02:14:50.340 thriving at the firehouse I was at. And I had 02:14:50.340 --> 02:14:54.039 a meeting and asked if I could change, basically 02:14:54.039 --> 02:14:55.800 change where I was at. I just needed to change 02:14:55.800 --> 02:15:01.520 a pace. And, you know, I said, if that leaves 02:15:01.520 --> 02:15:03.659 me, if that means leaving the special operations 02:15:03.659 --> 02:15:07.079 team, I'd like to do that. They recommended that 02:15:07.079 --> 02:15:09.140 I stay on the team, but just we have two different 02:15:09.140 --> 02:15:12.420 firehouses that did special ops. So I changed. 02:15:12.890 --> 02:15:16.010 uh shifts and firehouses and that really helped 02:15:16.010 --> 02:15:18.609 i just needed a different scene a change of you 02:15:18.609 --> 02:15:20.890 know pace and scenery sometimes you've got to 02:15:20.890 --> 02:15:23.970 change your environment to help change you know 02:15:23.970 --> 02:15:25.729 everything else in your life and i just needed 02:15:25.729 --> 02:15:27.909 a big change i needed everything to be different 02:15:27.909 --> 02:15:32.250 um and it helped because little by little i was 02:15:32.250 --> 02:15:36.670 finally able to start um enjoying things about 02:15:36.670 --> 02:15:40.210 the fire service again um, enjoy things at the 02:15:40.210 --> 02:15:43.250 job. I took a lot more care of myself. I surfed 02:15:43.250 --> 02:15:45.770 a lot more. I hung out with friends that weren't 02:15:45.770 --> 02:15:48.409 in the fire service and it, and it just really 02:15:48.409 --> 02:15:52.350 reiterated the importance to me of like you, 02:15:52.510 --> 02:15:56.729 the fire services is super important and you 02:15:56.729 --> 02:15:58.970 need to train and you, you need to be good at 02:15:58.970 --> 02:16:02.449 your job. And you like, I think it's, you shouldn't 02:16:02.449 --> 02:16:05.310 do this job without being all in, but at the 02:16:05.310 --> 02:16:08.699 same time, You definitely need that balance. 02:16:08.840 --> 02:16:11.340 You need the things where if work isn't going 02:16:11.340 --> 02:16:13.640 well, if the fire service isn't going well, you 02:16:13.640 --> 02:16:15.699 need something that you can rely on and depend 02:16:15.699 --> 02:16:19.260 on because if not, it is where I was left, where 02:16:19.260 --> 02:16:21.460 I felt like I had nothing. I didn't have anything 02:16:21.460 --> 02:16:26.159 to show in my life. I had put all my eggs in 02:16:26.159 --> 02:16:28.920 this one basket and when it wasn't working out 02:16:28.920 --> 02:16:32.579 at the time, I just, I didn't know what to do 02:16:32.579 --> 02:16:36.280 with myself. Um, I've had to learn to say no 02:16:36.280 --> 02:16:38.860 to a lot more things, right? That was part of 02:16:38.860 --> 02:16:41.120 me doing better. Um, I quit the combat challenge 02:16:41.120 --> 02:16:43.479 team, which yes, is a fitness thing, but it was 02:16:43.479 --> 02:16:46.100 very time consuming. It was very tough on the 02:16:46.100 --> 02:16:48.479 body. I have to work a bunch of, I was, you know, 02:16:48.520 --> 02:16:50.959 I teach fire Academy. I work for on -scene training 02:16:50.959 --> 02:16:54.579 and I do work out all the time. I just, I had 02:16:54.579 --> 02:16:56.479 to start saying no to things that were taking 02:16:56.479 --> 02:16:59.739 up a bunch of time in my life where I needed 02:16:59.739 --> 02:17:04.229 to focus on my mental health, my rest. my relationships. 02:17:05.790 --> 02:17:09.450 So that's what I did. And it made all the difference 02:17:09.450 --> 02:17:13.370 in the world. And then because of making all 02:17:13.370 --> 02:17:17.069 these changes, it catapulted me into want to 02:17:17.069 --> 02:17:20.110 get my health coach certification, which I've 02:17:20.110 --> 02:17:22.629 been doing for the past year. And I'm just finishing 02:17:22.629 --> 02:17:26.930 that up right now. So which has really given 02:17:26.930 --> 02:17:32.350 me a lot of tools and lectures that have just 02:17:32.350 --> 02:17:35.649 really expanded my mind so much it's it's um 02:17:35.649 --> 02:17:40.670 it's a lot of holistic stuff but they i love 02:17:40.670 --> 02:17:43.469 the science behind holistic and wellness treatments 02:17:43.469 --> 02:17:46.370 versus just medications because there's so much 02:17:46.370 --> 02:17:48.250 science behind it and everyone's like oh this 02:17:48.250 --> 02:17:52.020 is just weird shit but really Like there's there's 02:17:52.020 --> 02:17:55.120 so much science behind different breathing techniques 02:17:55.120 --> 02:17:58.219 for reducing anxiety, the different nutrients 02:17:58.219 --> 02:18:00.680 you can get from your food, getting proper sunlight, 02:18:00.860 --> 02:18:02.680 doing ice plunges and all the things in the way 02:18:02.680 --> 02:18:04.280 it affects your nervous system, your inflammation. 02:18:04.280 --> 02:18:08.239 It's like super important. So it kind of just 02:18:08.239 --> 02:18:12.520 led me towards that. So, yeah, it's funny when 02:18:12.520 --> 02:18:14.540 you were talking about, you know, your reset 02:18:14.540 --> 02:18:16.620 really was a surf trip. And then you go back 02:18:16.620 --> 02:18:19.399 to. your husband at the time slap you on the 02:18:19.399 --> 02:18:21.540 shoulder because they'd met this person that 02:18:21.540 --> 02:18:24.120 had all this time to surf. Yeah. There is the 02:18:24.120 --> 02:18:26.719 facade of the fire service from the outside looking 02:18:26.719 --> 02:18:28.760 in, Oh, they got best job in the world, you know, 02:18:28.760 --> 02:18:30.700 and not to dive into the whole work week thing 02:18:30.700 --> 02:18:33.440 yet again, but, and then you have the identity 02:18:33.440 --> 02:18:35.680 piece, you know, you go all in and you become 02:18:35.680 --> 02:18:38.399 just a firefighter and this is a danger. You 02:18:38.399 --> 02:18:41.079 get hurt. You, you know, you retire, whatever 02:18:41.079 --> 02:18:44.149 the thing is. And that's all you've been because 02:18:44.149 --> 02:18:46.069 that was like, now I'm tough, I'm strong, I'm 02:18:46.069 --> 02:18:48.270 a protector, I'm whatever, I'm valuable in society. 02:18:48.750 --> 02:18:50.530 And then it's stripped from you. And it's like, 02:18:50.610 --> 02:18:52.989 well, who the hell am I then? But you were always 02:18:52.989 --> 02:18:54.530 that same person. This is what I tell people. 02:18:54.809 --> 02:18:57.309 You had a heart to serve. This is the yin and 02:18:57.309 --> 02:18:59.549 the yang of the first responder. It was kindness 02:18:59.549 --> 02:19:02.010 and compassion, if you were doing the job for 02:19:02.010 --> 02:19:04.209 the right reasons, that sent you into uniform. 02:19:04.450 --> 02:19:06.969 And then we become this white circle, all hard. 02:19:07.690 --> 02:19:09.469 And then we come out the other end, like, you 02:19:09.469 --> 02:19:11.569 know, a fire version of Robocop and then wonder 02:19:11.569 --> 02:19:14.569 why we fall apart. Because you forgot that you 02:19:14.569 --> 02:19:17.229 were a human being that does the job of firefighting, 02:19:17.229 --> 02:19:19.190 that does the job of being a paramedic. That's 02:19:19.190 --> 02:19:21.549 not who you are. Who you are is a person that 02:19:21.549 --> 02:19:23.030 wants to make the world a little bit better. 02:19:23.450 --> 02:19:26.750 So as you transition out or you hit pause, you're 02:19:26.750 --> 02:19:28.870 reminded like, oh, no, no, the mission is exactly 02:19:28.870 --> 02:19:30.829 the same. This is just a uniform that I wear 02:19:30.829 --> 02:19:33.850 at this time. And I love what I do. But when 02:19:33.850 --> 02:19:36.270 this goes away, I'm still going to want to make 02:19:36.270 --> 02:19:38.329 the world better. And this is what I found with 02:19:38.329 --> 02:19:40.129 this, the podcast and then the books and now 02:19:40.129 --> 02:19:44.430 the TV show I'm developing. The potential number 02:19:44.430 --> 02:19:46.969 of lives that I'm planning with this next project 02:19:46.969 --> 02:19:49.969 could be in the millions. Whereas I can only 02:19:49.969 --> 02:19:52.209 respond to one incident at a time in the back 02:19:52.209 --> 02:19:55.950 of a rig. So it's a force multiplier thing. So 02:19:55.950 --> 02:20:00.610 same exact mission, different uniform. Yeah. 02:20:01.129 --> 02:20:04.229 Yeah. I mean, I think that's part of me getting 02:20:04.229 --> 02:20:07.750 my health coach certification is. wanting to 02:20:07.750 --> 02:20:11.409 bring more awareness and health to people around 02:20:11.409 --> 02:20:15.750 me and ways that you can improve in it without 02:20:15.750 --> 02:20:21.389 having to spend a lot of money or you don't necessarily 02:20:21.389 --> 02:20:24.149 need a gym or whatever. Like it's just wanting 02:20:24.149 --> 02:20:26.489 to be able to improve health and find ways because 02:20:26.489 --> 02:20:29.129 like once you start feeling good and you realize 02:20:29.129 --> 02:20:31.309 you can get out of that hole that you dug yourself 02:20:31.309 --> 02:20:34.100 into, you want other people that. be able to 02:20:34.100 --> 02:20:36.159 experience that and know that there is a way 02:20:36.159 --> 02:20:39.540 out. I think I honestly think I think every fireman 02:20:39.540 --> 02:20:42.040 should have a therapist. I think it's just a 02:20:42.040 --> 02:20:45.219 matter of time. It's not when it's or not if 02:20:45.219 --> 02:20:48.479 it's when you're going to need that extra mental 02:20:48.479 --> 02:20:50.879 support for whatever is going on, whether it's 02:20:50.879 --> 02:20:53.479 home life or calls and or just the culmination 02:20:53.479 --> 02:20:57.799 of all of it mixed in with the health. And I 02:20:57.799 --> 02:21:00.940 couldn't agree more that. There's lots of ways 02:21:00.940 --> 02:21:04.860 to make a huge impact on people, you know, you 02:21:04.860 --> 02:21:07.700 with your podcast and being able to share different 02:21:07.700 --> 02:21:10.879 stories and change people's lives. I mean, I 02:21:10.879 --> 02:21:13.920 listened to a podcast that changed my life. There 02:21:13.920 --> 02:21:16.120 was like a five minute portion and it changed 02:21:16.120 --> 02:21:18.239 the whole trajectory of my life just by listening 02:21:18.239 --> 02:21:23.500 to that one part. So I 100 % agree. Yeah, I think 02:21:23.500 --> 02:21:29.030 that. With with working on my health coach certification, 02:21:29.309 --> 02:21:31.629 it was really funny because not funny, but ironic. 02:21:32.750 --> 02:21:35.909 I ended up going through a weird health issue 02:21:35.909 --> 02:21:38.770 out of nowhere that started last August. I became 02:21:38.770 --> 02:21:41.049 like allergic out of nowhere, out of nowhere 02:21:41.049 --> 02:21:45.250 to like different fruits like mango, strawberry, 02:21:45.430 --> 02:21:48.610 banana, banana and pineapple, like turning red 02:21:48.610 --> 02:21:52.069 throat, closing like out of nowhere. And I went 02:21:52.069 --> 02:21:54.729 to go see all these doctors and my blood would. 02:21:55.069 --> 02:21:56.569 blood work would come back normal. And I would 02:21:56.569 --> 02:21:58.430 get this lump that started growing on the side 02:21:58.430 --> 02:21:59.850 of my head, pictures of it all. I went to an 02:21:59.850 --> 02:22:01.829 endocrinologist and he's like, Jenny, if you 02:22:01.829 --> 02:22:03.250 didn't have these pictures, no one would believe 02:22:03.250 --> 02:22:04.670 you. And I'm like, I know, I don't know what's 02:22:04.670 --> 02:22:07.770 going on. And I had to start carrying around 02:22:07.770 --> 02:22:09.729 an EpiPen and no one could figure out what was 02:22:09.729 --> 02:22:12.250 going on. And I'm in the middle of my health 02:22:12.250 --> 02:22:15.229 coach certification and everyone. Everyone, I 02:22:15.229 --> 02:22:17.889 have been prone to weird illnesses and weird 02:22:17.889 --> 02:22:20.389 things since I was younger. I've had meningitis. 02:22:20.510 --> 02:22:23.809 I've had osteomyelitis. I've been in the hospital 02:22:23.809 --> 02:22:26.350 multiple times for hypokalemia. I just have strange 02:22:26.350 --> 02:22:30.940 things that don't happen to everyone else. I'm 02:22:30.940 --> 02:22:33.540 sure there's somewhere in there, it's the culmination 02:22:33.540 --> 02:22:36.059 of traumas and issues that have caused issues 02:22:36.059 --> 02:22:39.340 with my immune system and my health. And I'm 02:22:39.340 --> 02:22:41.600 sure the stress response from what I went through 02:22:41.600 --> 02:22:45.059 before is showing up in my body later. And it's 02:22:45.059 --> 02:22:47.700 interesting, the science behind trauma actually 02:22:47.700 --> 02:22:51.500 causing staying in your fascia. Cortisol will 02:22:51.500 --> 02:22:53.979 get stuck in your tissues. You actually have 02:22:53.979 --> 02:22:56.500 to release it. It's a pretty interesting phenomenon. 02:22:59.809 --> 02:23:04.290 I ended up having to figure out ways to work 02:23:04.290 --> 02:23:05.969 on my health and I ended up seeing a functional 02:23:05.969 --> 02:23:07.809 medicine doctor and I did all these supplements 02:23:07.809 --> 02:23:13.930 and long story short, it basically was a very 02:23:13.930 --> 02:23:17.309 strange time to go through while I'm trying to 02:23:17.309 --> 02:23:19.350 get my health coach certification. I have a weird 02:23:19.350 --> 02:23:23.409 undiagnosed illness and having to navigate that 02:23:23.409 --> 02:23:24.829 and that's one of the things that I eventually 02:23:24.829 --> 02:23:26.989 want to help people through is being able to 02:23:26.989 --> 02:23:29.270 listen to their bodies. Knowing you're not crazy 02:23:29.270 --> 02:23:32.709 if something's going on. Finding ways to overcome 02:23:32.709 --> 02:23:35.170 it. And a lot of the times it really just has 02:23:35.170 --> 02:23:38.309 to do with, I don't think anything will get better 02:23:38.309 --> 02:23:41.229 in your life until you can be mentally well and 02:23:41.229 --> 02:23:45.170 you can start working on your happiness. And 02:23:45.170 --> 02:23:50.530 I truly believe in that. So anyway, that's just 02:23:50.530 --> 02:23:55.590 another. So for people listening, if they want 02:23:55.590 --> 02:23:57.850 to, you know, reach out to you, follow you or 02:23:57.850 --> 02:24:01.129 even be able to see when you start doing the 02:24:01.129 --> 02:24:02.950 health coaching as well, where are the best places 02:24:02.950 --> 02:24:08.049 online to do that? I guess right now, Instagram 02:24:08.049 --> 02:24:12.569 is probably the easiest to reach me. Or, you 02:24:12.569 --> 02:24:15.879 know, you can send an email, but. Instagram is 02:24:15.879 --> 02:24:20.719 a little easier or Facebook. My Instagram is 02:24:20.719 --> 02:24:24.559 firechick880. It was something I picked a long 02:24:24.559 --> 02:24:29.579 time ago and it just stuck. But you can, I mean, 02:24:29.600 --> 02:24:32.219 you can email me. My email is jenny .grima at 02:24:32.219 --> 02:24:36.700 gmail .com. But yeah, a lot of people usually 02:24:36.700 --> 02:24:38.600 try and reach out on social media and Facebook 02:24:38.600 --> 02:24:42.040 on Instagram. I do plan on I'm in the middle 02:24:42.040 --> 02:24:44.340 of studying for the lieutenant's test, which 02:24:44.340 --> 02:24:47.540 is it's finished with in October. So after that, 02:24:47.659 --> 02:24:49.620 I wanted to focus a little bit more on the health 02:24:49.620 --> 02:24:51.659 coach side and being able to work with people 02:24:51.659 --> 02:24:54.799 who were interested. So, yeah. Brilliant. Well, 02:24:54.920 --> 02:24:56.600 I want to thank you so much. It's been such an 02:24:56.600 --> 02:24:59.020 amazing conversation. Yet another unique perspective, 02:24:59.379 --> 02:25:01.760 especially like you said. entering the world 02:25:01.760 --> 02:25:04.040 of instruction with you know a couple of years 02:25:04.040 --> 02:25:05.979 in the fire service specifically but that's not 02:25:05.979 --> 02:25:08.280 negating all the teaching you did before as well 02:25:08.280 --> 02:25:10.819 and then the physical fitness side as well so 02:25:10.819 --> 02:25:13.440 i want to thank you so much for being so generous 02:25:13.440 --> 02:25:15.340 with your time and coming on the behind the shield 02:25:15.340 --> 02:25:18.840 podcast today absolutely it's an honor i really 02:25:18.840 --> 02:25:19.600 appreciate it