1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:03,820
This episode is brought to you by Thorne and I have some incredible news for any of you

2
00:00:03,820 --> 00:00:07,960
that are in the military, first responder or medical professions.

3
00:00:07,960 --> 00:00:15,860
In an effort to give back, Thorne is now offering you an ongoing 35% off each and every one

4
00:00:15,860 --> 00:00:19,780
of your purchases of their incredible nutritional solutions.

5
00:00:19,780 --> 00:00:27,280
Now Thorne is the official supplement of CrossFit, the UFC, the Mayo Clinic, the Human Performance

6
00:00:27,280 --> 00:00:31,480
Project and multiple special operations organizations.

7
00:00:31,480 --> 00:00:36,440
I myself have used them for several years and that is why I brought them on as a sponsor.

8
00:00:36,440 --> 00:00:42,080
Some of my favorite products they have are their Multivitamin Elite, their Whey Protein,

9
00:00:42,080 --> 00:00:45,840
the Super EPA and then most recently, Cynaquil.

10
00:00:45,840 --> 00:00:50,120
As a firefighter, a stuntman and a martial artist, I've had my share of brain trauma

11
00:00:50,120 --> 00:00:55,520
and sleep deprivation and Cynaquil is their latest brain health supplement.

12
00:00:55,520 --> 00:01:02,640
Now to qualify for the 35% off, go to thorne.com, T-H-O-R-N-E dot com.

13
00:01:02,640 --> 00:01:05,460
Click on sign in and then create a new account.

14
00:01:05,460 --> 00:01:09,800
You will see the opportunity to register as a first responder or member of military.

15
00:01:09,800 --> 00:01:14,680
When you click on that, it will take you through verification with GovX.

16
00:01:14,680 --> 00:01:18,980
You'll simply choose a profession, provide one piece of documentation and then you are

17
00:01:18,980 --> 00:01:20,920
verified for life.

18
00:01:20,920 --> 00:01:26,720
From that point onwards, you will continue to receive 35% off through Thorn.

19
00:01:26,720 --> 00:01:34,360
For those of you who don't qualify, there is still the 10% off using the code BTS10

20
00:01:34,360 --> 00:01:36,240
for a one time purchase.

21
00:01:36,240 --> 00:01:42,040
To learn more about Thorn, go to episode 323 of the Behind the Shield Podcast with Joel

22
00:01:42,040 --> 00:01:45,840
Titoro and Wes Barnett.

23
00:01:45,840 --> 00:01:47,160
Welcome to the Behind the Shield Podcast.

24
00:01:47,160 --> 00:01:52,960
As always, my name is James Gearing and I am so excited to announce that this is episode

25
00:01:52,960 --> 00:01:53,960
1000.

26
00:01:53,960 --> 00:01:58,520
Now, I put a teaser out that I was going to have a very special guest coming on to mark

27
00:01:58,520 --> 00:02:06,680
this absolute benchmark and I can't think of anyone more special than my son, Ty.

28
00:02:06,680 --> 00:02:12,220
We did an interview with my wife and then my stepson, my bonus boy, Ethan and Ty six

29
00:02:12,220 --> 00:02:17,080
years ago and he was only 11 then I think.

30
00:02:17,080 --> 00:02:23,880
So, now we sat down, he's 17 years old, he's graduating in the summer and I wanted to bring

31
00:02:23,880 --> 00:02:25,200
him on for two reasons.

32
00:02:25,200 --> 00:02:31,400
Firstly, selfishly of course, I want to get this conversation, this moment in his childhood

33
00:02:31,400 --> 00:02:36,680
before he kind of flies the nest but also he's been through a lot.

34
00:02:36,680 --> 00:02:42,400
He struggled academically when he was young and now he's in AP classes in senior school,

35
00:02:42,400 --> 00:02:44,860
in high school, excuse me.

36
00:02:44,860 --> 00:02:50,680
He has had some incredible highs in his life but also some deep lows.

37
00:02:50,680 --> 00:02:54,440
One of the ones as I'm sure any of you that's kind of been following this community for

38
00:02:54,440 --> 00:02:59,800
a few years now was when there was an absolute epidemic of our school children being Baker

39
00:02:59,800 --> 00:03:06,240
acted, 72-hour psychiatric hold, anytime they had any sort of kind of crisis and he was

40
00:03:06,240 --> 00:03:09,320
part of that absolute catastrophe.

41
00:03:09,320 --> 00:03:13,640
So we talked about that, we talked about the ripple effect and how much damage that was

42
00:03:13,640 --> 00:03:14,640
doing.

43
00:03:14,640 --> 00:03:21,240
The laws changed and then we talk about that too but at the time I had no idea this was

44
00:03:21,240 --> 00:03:22,240
going on.

45
00:03:22,240 --> 00:03:26,320
I was talking about mental health and my son became part of this horrendous, horrendous

46
00:03:26,320 --> 00:03:27,840
abuse of power.

47
00:03:27,840 --> 00:03:32,520
So I think the real value for this is obviously his parents listening to one of our school

48
00:03:32,520 --> 00:03:37,120
children but then hopefully even some of your children or grandchildren out there, this

49
00:03:37,120 --> 00:03:39,860
might be a value for them to listen to.

50
00:03:39,860 --> 00:03:46,680
He's had such a kind of nuanced journey through school, JROTC, he's been a varsity athlete,

51
00:03:46,680 --> 00:03:49,320
he's also been hurt as a varsity athlete.

52
00:03:49,320 --> 00:03:51,480
There's that kind of identity crisis.

53
00:03:51,480 --> 00:03:56,160
There's so much in there that I think people can take away from and his absolute love of

54
00:03:56,160 --> 00:03:57,640
Lego as well.

55
00:03:57,640 --> 00:04:22,560
So without further ado, I introduce to you my son Ty Gearing.

56
00:04:22,560 --> 00:04:29,160
Well we are sitting here for episode 1000 and I can't think of anyone I would want to

57
00:04:29,160 --> 00:04:33,240
be my guest more than my son Ty Gearing.

58
00:04:33,240 --> 00:04:36,680
So Ty, I want to welcome you, which sounds so weird, isn't it?

59
00:04:36,680 --> 00:04:40,120
Yes, welcome you onto the Behind the Shield podcast today.

60
00:04:40,120 --> 00:04:41,360
Thank you.

61
00:04:41,360 --> 00:04:45,800
So I was trying to figure out how we would start this conversation so I'm just going

62
00:04:45,800 --> 00:04:49,920
to send the same questions to you that I do my other people to start it.

63
00:04:49,920 --> 00:04:54,800
So for people listening, tell me where you were born and tell me a little bit about your

64
00:04:54,800 --> 00:04:58,960
family, what your parents do, how many siblings?

65
00:04:58,960 --> 00:05:02,080
I'm from Huntington Beach.

66
00:05:02,080 --> 00:05:07,360
My dad's a firefighter, my mom is a nurse but she used to be a trauma nurse now she's

67
00:05:07,360 --> 00:05:11,600
specializing in cancer floor in Marion Hospital.

68
00:05:11,600 --> 00:05:18,980
I have one stepbrother but he's just Ethan to me because he comes and goes sometimes.

69
00:05:18,980 --> 00:05:20,520
So yeah.

70
00:05:20,520 --> 00:05:26,680
So yeah, we were living in Huntington Beach, you were born in Hogue Hospital, Newport Beach.

71
00:05:26,680 --> 00:05:27,680
Yeah.

72
00:05:27,680 --> 00:05:30,560
So I was trying to think again, like how can I because I know there's some things I want

73
00:05:30,560 --> 00:05:33,560
to talk about but I don't want it to just be like go into these topics.

74
00:05:33,560 --> 00:05:39,040
So interesting question for you, what is your earliest memory of anything?

75
00:05:39,040 --> 00:05:42,240
What is the youngest you remember?

76
00:05:42,240 --> 00:05:44,040
So I mean, this is kind of getting very personal.

77
00:05:44,040 --> 00:05:51,600
I mean, one is really cool of when we skied in France or when my mom cheated on you.

78
00:05:51,600 --> 00:05:54,400
So I mean, that's kind of personal.

79
00:05:54,400 --> 00:05:55,800
But you remember?

80
00:05:55,800 --> 00:06:01,160
I remember we went to his party because the divorce was like when I was four-ish, like

81
00:06:01,160 --> 00:06:02,160
early four.

82
00:06:02,160 --> 00:06:06,920
So I don't remember the time zone but that's probably my earliest memory of skiing in France

83
00:06:06,920 --> 00:06:10,680
when I was four or going to that party with my mom.

84
00:06:10,680 --> 00:06:17,080
Okay, and for the record, obviously, your mom and I both moved on, I'm remarried, life

85
00:06:17,080 --> 00:06:18,080
has happened.

86
00:06:18,080 --> 00:06:24,640
But with that, there are so many families out there that are, the parents are divorced

87
00:06:24,640 --> 00:06:28,040
as you know, even mine, my mom and dad.

88
00:06:28,040 --> 00:06:33,760
So talk to me about just that because everything has a good thing and a bad thing.

89
00:06:33,760 --> 00:06:36,200
It might be more bad than good.

90
00:06:36,200 --> 00:06:42,360
What was the, you know, if any good that came from those two separate homes, those two separate

91
00:06:42,360 --> 00:06:45,080
paths and then what is the negative?

92
00:06:45,080 --> 00:06:46,320
What is the bad?

93
00:06:46,320 --> 00:06:50,920
I mean, I feel like personality just changes between siblings and non-siblings because I

94
00:06:50,920 --> 00:06:55,060
get a lot, oh, that makes sense that you're only a child.

95
00:06:55,060 --> 00:06:58,200
So I feel like the pros is you're very peaceful.

96
00:06:58,200 --> 00:07:03,720
I feel like you're very quiet and I mean, that's not a good thing but like you're patient,

97
00:07:03,720 --> 00:07:07,320
I feel like because like you had your way, you don't have to fight and you think it's

98
00:07:07,320 --> 00:07:08,320
just you.

99
00:07:08,320 --> 00:07:13,080
So I feel like that's pretty good and you are set for the real world because you're

100
00:07:13,080 --> 00:07:14,240
by yourself in the real world.

101
00:07:14,240 --> 00:07:19,360
I think you're kind of used to being lonely and kind of being used to realistically just

102
00:07:19,360 --> 00:07:21,040
being by yourself.

103
00:07:21,040 --> 00:07:22,040
And I think that's it.

104
00:07:22,040 --> 00:07:26,200
And just like I said, just being in a more quiet home, I mean, that's not some people,

105
00:07:26,200 --> 00:07:31,400
but at least our home is pretty quiet, pretty chill, I guess you could say.

106
00:07:31,400 --> 00:07:34,680
The cons is like you have to make your own friends.

107
00:07:34,680 --> 00:07:39,000
Like you have no one to rely on besides, of course, your parents, but you're by yourself.

108
00:07:39,000 --> 00:07:42,400
So I think that's a huge pro and a huge con.

109
00:07:42,400 --> 00:07:49,600
But yeah, and especially, I mean, I feel like if, I mean, I'm lucky I have no siblings because

110
00:07:49,600 --> 00:07:53,360
I feel like with divorced parents it'd be kind of tricky and I don't know how that'll

111
00:07:53,360 --> 00:07:54,360
work too.

112
00:07:54,360 --> 00:07:57,160
So but that's how I am.

113
00:07:57,160 --> 00:08:02,120
Yeah, because as you know, I was the opposite, I was one of five and I've described us recently

114
00:08:02,120 --> 00:08:06,200
as feral, meaning like wild animals.

115
00:08:06,200 --> 00:08:07,280
So we were on the farm.

116
00:08:07,280 --> 00:08:12,140
But yeah, when I look back, I had friends, but a lot of my playmates were my brothers

117
00:08:12,140 --> 00:08:13,140
and sisters.

118
00:08:13,140 --> 00:08:17,080
And you know, Uncle Tim and I, you know, we didn't play well together.

119
00:08:17,080 --> 00:08:18,280
He tried to murder me once.

120
00:08:18,280 --> 00:08:24,640
But yeah, if you can hear that in the background, it's my dog being a complete weirdo.

121
00:08:24,640 --> 00:08:26,040
But that's a single child.

122
00:08:26,040 --> 00:08:30,240
What about the going from home to home, having the divorced parents?

123
00:08:30,240 --> 00:08:33,800
What are the good and what is the bad?

124
00:08:33,800 --> 00:08:39,520
I mean, start with the bad, just having shit step dads.

125
00:08:39,520 --> 00:08:46,680
For I think Dean was kind of abusive, I think, to my mom and having bad households.

126
00:08:46,680 --> 00:08:51,560
Then Adrian, he was a cheating crap dude.

127
00:08:51,560 --> 00:08:52,560
That's probably the bad.

128
00:08:52,560 --> 00:08:57,600
Just having to move, get something, I mean, it's time consuming because you have to go

129
00:08:57,600 --> 00:08:59,920
to the house and you can do something else.

130
00:08:59,920 --> 00:09:04,040
So it takes time and just not fun.

131
00:09:04,040 --> 00:09:05,640
It's not at all.

132
00:09:05,640 --> 00:09:11,720
But I think the positive is you have a peace house, I guess, if you're lucky.

133
00:09:11,720 --> 00:09:17,240
Not everyone does, but at least for me, I have, you're my peace house and everything.

134
00:09:17,240 --> 00:09:18,240
So yeah.

135
00:09:18,240 --> 00:09:23,920
I think that's an important part of the conversation, isn't it?

136
00:09:23,920 --> 00:09:27,520
Sometimes moms and dads stay together and they think they're doing the right thing for

137
00:09:27,520 --> 00:09:31,400
the child, but it would be worse because I think we've talked about it.

138
00:09:31,400 --> 00:09:34,920
You remember when your mom and I would argue and it was terrible, wasn't it?

139
00:09:34,920 --> 00:09:36,320
It's not good for you at all.

140
00:09:36,320 --> 00:09:39,040
And the child feels scared and they don't feel safe.

141
00:09:39,040 --> 00:09:41,680
It wasn't like it was a violent argument, it was just shouting.

142
00:09:41,680 --> 00:09:45,160
I remember just walking up to you guys, he was always in the driveway, you guys, you

143
00:09:45,160 --> 00:09:46,160
saw him.

144
00:09:46,160 --> 00:09:49,400
You saw him walk out of the car and just stared at you.

145
00:09:49,400 --> 00:09:52,200
Then you usually want to stop it, not my mom.

146
00:09:52,200 --> 00:09:53,200
Yeah.

147
00:09:53,200 --> 00:09:55,760
I mean, I hate arguing, but I mean, you know, it takes two to argue.

148
00:09:55,760 --> 00:09:58,480
So I'm not saying I was blameless, but yeah.

149
00:09:58,480 --> 00:10:04,080
So the thing that's important for people to kind of think about is that sometimes when

150
00:10:04,080 --> 00:10:08,640
there's a reason for divorce, whatever that is, you feel like it's going to hurt the children

151
00:10:08,640 --> 00:10:12,240
and it is, but staying together could be worse.

152
00:10:12,240 --> 00:10:15,840
So yeah, I agree.

153
00:10:15,840 --> 00:10:20,480
Because I have friends that are like that and having divorced parents is way better

154
00:10:20,480 --> 00:10:23,140
than parents that argue all the time.

155
00:10:23,140 --> 00:10:26,840
So we're seeing as we've got a complete nutcase German Shepherd trying to ruin this interview,

156
00:10:26,840 --> 00:10:28,440
let's talk about dogs.

157
00:10:28,440 --> 00:10:32,860
So as you were going through this and you know, obviously, you know, you've got this

158
00:10:32,860 --> 00:10:35,280
relationship issue with your mom and dad.

159
00:10:35,280 --> 00:10:37,400
Stop moving the microphone.

160
00:10:37,400 --> 00:10:39,520
Talk to me about Nini, our first German Shepherd.

161
00:10:39,520 --> 00:10:42,160
How important was it for her in your life?

162
00:10:42,160 --> 00:10:46,240
Just it helped my life, just helps me my loneliness.

163
00:10:46,240 --> 00:10:50,800
I still remember a time when I got hospitalized, when the cop took me, I remember crying on

164
00:10:50,800 --> 00:10:54,840
her for and just they took me away and I was hugging her.

165
00:10:54,840 --> 00:10:58,240
So I remember that and she just helps me all the time.

166
00:10:58,240 --> 00:11:03,960
And that's one thing that losing her was one that helped me strengthen the goal of becoming

167
00:11:03,960 --> 00:11:10,240
a veterinarian and make me thriving, taking all these college classes to get better education

168
00:11:10,240 --> 00:11:12,160
to go to college.

169
00:11:12,160 --> 00:11:18,200
But it hurts so much and she's my only friend, like a true friend.

170
00:11:18,200 --> 00:11:19,280
And she's the only thing I cried for.

171
00:11:19,280 --> 00:11:21,240
I don't cry with grades.

172
00:11:21,240 --> 00:11:23,160
I don't cry for girls.

173
00:11:23,160 --> 00:11:26,080
She's the only thing I really cry about.

174
00:11:26,080 --> 00:11:30,920
Well you saw me, I cried like a baby for like a month, I swear to God, when we lost her.

175
00:11:30,920 --> 00:11:38,160
But yeah, she just, the innocence, the no, not the corruption, I think that's what makes

176
00:11:38,160 --> 00:11:42,440
them so amazing is that they can show emotion without being corrupt.

177
00:11:42,440 --> 00:11:44,300
Absolutely.

178
00:11:44,300 --> 00:11:48,200
So what about, let's talk about sports, the youngest that you remember, because I mean,

179
00:11:48,200 --> 00:11:49,700
you played so much.

180
00:11:49,700 --> 00:11:53,780
So talk to me about, you know, soccer, jujitsu, all the things you remember from early life

181
00:11:53,780 --> 00:11:57,000
and again, what they did for you.

182
00:11:57,000 --> 00:12:03,040
I mean, I'm pretty sure I did soccer or football, I guess you could say.

183
00:12:03,040 --> 00:12:04,040
Football.

184
00:12:04,040 --> 00:12:06,160
I'm so used to like changing it.

185
00:12:06,160 --> 00:12:09,560
It's good that you're bilingual though.

186
00:12:09,560 --> 00:12:13,880
But I'm pretty sure I did football first and jujitsu too, but that was at five years old

187
00:12:13,880 --> 00:12:19,200
and I just remember having that brother and sister and of course Bill as my father figure

188
00:12:19,200 --> 00:12:23,360
until he passed when I was in fifth grade, fourth grade.

189
00:12:23,360 --> 00:12:27,480
So I knew him for a while before he passed luckily.

190
00:12:27,480 --> 00:12:29,200
But it just helped me.

191
00:12:29,200 --> 00:12:31,240
I mean, for early, I don't really remember most of it.

192
00:12:31,240 --> 00:12:34,120
I just remember having father figures for the first time.

193
00:12:34,120 --> 00:12:38,720
And I think that's what really helped me in earlier times.

194
00:12:38,720 --> 00:12:44,040
Do you remember any of the suffering because you were small in jujitsu?

195
00:12:44,040 --> 00:12:50,400
You know, we went to quite a few competitions and there were times where obviously you had

196
00:12:50,400 --> 00:12:55,120
grappling sessions where you got your wind knocked out of you or it hurt.

197
00:12:55,120 --> 00:12:59,680
But you kept going back, you kept training, you kept doing other competitions.

198
00:12:59,680 --> 00:13:04,480
So what do you remember as far as the toughness that it created?

199
00:13:04,480 --> 00:13:10,560
One thing I remember, I mean kind of like toughness is just hiding the jealousy.

200
00:13:10,560 --> 00:13:12,560
I think that's when I started to have a fake smile.

201
00:13:12,560 --> 00:13:17,000
I'm not like a true fake smile, but like clapping when a person beat you or clapping when I

202
00:13:17,000 --> 00:13:21,680
was at school and people got the attendance reward or A's and B's.

203
00:13:21,680 --> 00:13:25,440
Like clapping and just showing, like hiding their jealousy.

204
00:13:25,440 --> 00:13:26,920
So I think that's one thing I do remember a lot.

205
00:13:26,920 --> 00:13:29,960
I mean, it's kind of different subjects.

206
00:13:29,960 --> 00:13:33,040
Well you said about not winning the attendance awards and this is something that you and

207
00:13:33,040 --> 00:13:34,300
I have talked about.

208
00:13:34,300 --> 00:13:40,080
So why will you never win an attendance award and what are we doing instead?

209
00:13:40,080 --> 00:13:45,480
I never won the attendance award because I'd probably miss at least a week or two of school,

210
00:13:45,480 --> 00:13:46,480
like straight.

211
00:13:46,480 --> 00:13:48,480
And it's because we're seeing family.

212
00:13:48,480 --> 00:13:52,560
And I think that's way better than having full attendance because it's just a paper.

213
00:13:52,560 --> 00:13:55,000
You're not making memories with that paper.

214
00:13:55,000 --> 00:13:56,600
So where are our family?

215
00:13:56,600 --> 00:13:59,320
Where did you end up going when you were young?

216
00:13:59,320 --> 00:14:02,480
France, England, Oroport.

217
00:14:02,480 --> 00:14:07,920
So as, because I mean, I've talked about this, I think in the past on here, but of course

218
00:14:07,920 --> 00:14:09,800
being present at school is important.

219
00:14:09,800 --> 00:14:14,280
Of course not missing too many classes, so therefore it affects your grades is important.

220
00:14:14,280 --> 00:14:17,980
But there's a lot to be learned from traveling too.

221
00:14:17,980 --> 00:14:21,680
So what are some of the things you remember from trips when you were younger?

222
00:14:21,680 --> 00:14:24,080
I mean, you mentioned skiing, for example.

223
00:14:24,080 --> 00:14:25,080
Skiing I remember a lot.

224
00:14:25,080 --> 00:14:30,640
I remember going to the, well, the stones are very popular in England.

225
00:14:30,640 --> 00:14:31,640
Oh, Stonehenge.

226
00:14:31,640 --> 00:14:32,640
Stonehenge, of course.

227
00:14:32,640 --> 00:14:37,880
I remember that and having that delicious sausage roll and learning the culture there.

228
00:14:37,880 --> 00:14:43,600
I remember just hearing all the different languages and seeing, just seeing how actually

229
00:14:43,600 --> 00:14:45,160
diverse we are.

230
00:14:45,160 --> 00:14:47,320
It's fascinating just seeing, hearing all of them.

231
00:14:47,320 --> 00:14:51,640
Language, especially in London, where you think it's such a city and just hear everybody

232
00:14:51,640 --> 00:14:55,840
and it's so fascinating just hearing different cultures, different styles, how they wear,

233
00:14:55,840 --> 00:14:56,840
just how they present themselves.

234
00:14:56,840 --> 00:14:58,320
I think it's still very fascinating.

235
00:14:58,320 --> 00:15:02,000
Especially now I just see it.

236
00:15:02,000 --> 00:15:08,360
Like, so I've always been very observant person and now it's just so cool seeing the diversity

237
00:15:08,360 --> 00:15:12,640
and how we're not just one, we're many into one.

238
00:15:12,640 --> 00:15:16,960
How did that, because there's a phrase and I can never remember exactly what it says,

239
00:15:16,960 --> 00:15:22,360
but Twain has a quote about basically like travel is the enemy of prejudice.

240
00:15:22,360 --> 00:15:26,480
So when you travel, you start to see that we're all very, very similar with different

241
00:15:26,480 --> 00:15:29,040
cultures and all that stuff.

242
00:15:29,040 --> 00:15:33,280
When you look back at all the traveling you've done, how has that shaped the way that you

243
00:15:33,280 --> 00:15:35,680
look at things here in America?

244
00:15:35,680 --> 00:15:41,880
I think it's my thinking is not limited because I've seen things because there's a joke that

245
00:15:41,880 --> 00:15:44,120
British people aren't real and all that stuff.

246
00:15:44,120 --> 00:15:45,680
British people aren't real?

247
00:15:45,680 --> 00:15:46,680
Yes.

248
00:15:46,680 --> 00:15:47,680
I think I've heard a joke about that.

249
00:15:47,680 --> 00:15:48,680
Like what, like ghosts?

250
00:15:48,680 --> 00:15:51,480
Because of our accents, how they speak.

251
00:15:51,480 --> 00:15:56,960
It's fascinating because like, just about English, there's so many different Englishes.

252
00:15:56,960 --> 00:15:59,840
Like English, there's American English, there's Jamaican English.

253
00:15:59,840 --> 00:16:01,640
I don't know what it's called, of course.

254
00:16:01,640 --> 00:16:07,800
I forgot, but there's so many different diversities of just our own language that we don't know

255
00:16:07,800 --> 00:16:13,120
of and it's just fascinating how we can learn so much.

256
00:16:13,120 --> 00:16:17,280
And as you know, if you were traveling, they just think honestly, just what their parents

257
00:16:17,280 --> 00:16:20,240
think because that's how our teachers think.

258
00:16:20,240 --> 00:16:23,720
But when you travel, you know what you see.

259
00:16:23,720 --> 00:16:25,280
Yeah, absolutely.

260
00:16:25,280 --> 00:16:26,680
All right.

261
00:16:26,680 --> 00:16:30,440
Well then let's go to middle school.

262
00:16:30,440 --> 00:16:36,360
So yeah, I know you're, so just to be very clear overall, you know, I'll ask if you agree

263
00:16:36,360 --> 00:16:40,000
with me, but I think that your schools that you've gone to have been amazing and you've

264
00:16:40,000 --> 00:16:41,720
had some incredible teachers.

265
00:16:41,720 --> 00:16:50,640
But one or two bad people can make a very, very negative impact on a child.

266
00:16:50,640 --> 00:16:58,680
So if you have wherever you want to go, lead me up to that day and you say as little as

267
00:16:58,680 --> 00:17:03,920
you want to say, but we'll definitely obviously talk about the centers and the negative impact

268
00:17:03,920 --> 00:17:05,360
of that.

269
00:17:05,360 --> 00:17:06,360
So tell me about that.

270
00:17:06,360 --> 00:17:10,720
I mean, at first I just want to talk about like how my mental state was kind of weird

271
00:17:10,720 --> 00:17:14,640
like in sixth grade, like I tried to act cool and I don't know, it's weird just thinking

272
00:17:14,640 --> 00:17:16,160
about how embarrassing it was.

273
00:17:16,160 --> 00:17:17,160
I started cussing.

274
00:17:17,160 --> 00:17:18,160
It was very stupid.

275
00:17:18,160 --> 00:17:23,600
I mean, because of course I do now, but it was like overly, you know, my English was

276
00:17:23,600 --> 00:17:24,600
good.

277
00:17:24,600 --> 00:17:25,600
It was very stupid.

278
00:17:25,600 --> 00:17:30,000
And I don't know why, because I didn't hang out with bad people.

279
00:17:30,000 --> 00:17:32,240
My friend Groove has always been pretty good.

280
00:17:32,240 --> 00:17:38,240
But for some reason I started acts weird and it's just only three months changed because

281
00:17:38,240 --> 00:17:41,160
school ends in May.

282
00:17:41,160 --> 00:17:42,520
In August we go back to school.

283
00:17:42,520 --> 00:17:47,080
So I don't know why I thought the way I thought I did.

284
00:17:47,080 --> 00:17:55,100
But I remember it was, I think the first time was February, I think.

285
00:17:55,100 --> 00:17:58,840
So I just remember when was that?

286
00:17:58,840 --> 00:18:03,640
Oh, I remember actually no, it's the second time.

287
00:18:03,640 --> 00:18:08,080
First time I remember, the only thing I remember was someone was talking crap or something

288
00:18:08,080 --> 00:18:10,640
and I was having a bad day.

289
00:18:10,640 --> 00:18:15,280
He just kept on bugging me and I said, I wanted to kill you or something.

290
00:18:15,280 --> 00:18:18,320
Because he was like, I think he was actually physically touching me.

291
00:18:18,320 --> 00:18:21,280
And he reported it and then I went to the centers.

292
00:18:21,280 --> 00:18:27,360
And I remember just like being paranoid because it was like a jail and I just heard people

293
00:18:27,360 --> 00:18:29,120
and I was like very quiet back then.

294
00:18:29,120 --> 00:18:34,880
So I was like very wanting my peace and it was just like blah, blah, blah kids like screaming,

295
00:18:34,880 --> 00:18:35,880
yelling, like being angry.

296
00:18:35,880 --> 00:18:39,520
And I was just saying like crap, what am I doing here?

297
00:18:39,520 --> 00:18:42,080
And it was hard sleeping.

298
00:18:42,080 --> 00:18:46,720
The second time I remember strongest because I remember just so many things like made my

299
00:18:46,720 --> 00:18:52,240
mental straight because I remember in the morning I got like my fun of like someone

300
00:18:52,240 --> 00:18:56,520
like hit my breakfast on my hands and got all my clothes.

301
00:18:56,520 --> 00:18:58,720
Then like school, school, horrible.

302
00:18:58,720 --> 00:19:04,800
Then I remember in the bus, I like my music wasn't working or something like that.

303
00:19:04,800 --> 00:19:08,440
So my thoughts, I was just hearing all the loud stuff on the bus.

304
00:19:08,440 --> 00:19:12,720
I remember someone threw a water bottle at me and it hit me and got my clothes soaked.

305
00:19:12,720 --> 00:19:14,000
So I was like feeling disgusting.

306
00:19:14,000 --> 00:19:17,600
And I remember I just kind of want to kill myself.

307
00:19:17,600 --> 00:19:21,520
Then I walked and then like people called on me again.

308
00:19:21,520 --> 00:19:25,760
Then I remember the strongest memory I have of that is just like holding the same daddy,

309
00:19:25,760 --> 00:19:26,760
I want to go home.

310
00:19:26,760 --> 00:19:31,680
That's the strongest or I was the first time, but that's what the strongest memory I have

311
00:19:31,680 --> 00:19:35,360
of the centers, I want to go home and just hear a new cry.

312
00:19:35,360 --> 00:19:40,040
Well let's go back to the first time because what the teacher said is that you weren't

313
00:19:40,040 --> 00:19:42,180
even threatening anyone.

314
00:19:42,180 --> 00:19:47,640
You were in tears at your desk and you were having that thought in your head of kill,

315
00:19:47,640 --> 00:19:48,980
kill, kill.

316
00:19:48,980 --> 00:19:54,200
And so she asked you what's going on and you told her that.

317
00:19:54,200 --> 00:19:59,400
And what should have happened, and this is per protocol, this is by the centers themselves

318
00:19:59,400 --> 00:20:03,360
saying this, is that then that should have been a phone call to me and it should have

319
00:20:03,360 --> 00:20:08,600
been a phone call to the centers who would have sent a team or a person to come evaluate

320
00:20:08,600 --> 00:20:12,120
and based on all the protocol, they would be like, okay, this child is already going

321
00:20:12,120 --> 00:20:17,000
through some stuff because as you mentioned, this is about the time with relationship issues

322
00:20:17,000 --> 00:20:19,000
in your mom's house, wasn't it?

323
00:20:19,000 --> 00:20:21,360
And so you were already going through some stuff there.

324
00:20:21,360 --> 00:20:23,560
You're already seeing the counselor.

325
00:20:23,560 --> 00:20:28,420
So you already had a relationship, but she wasn't there at that moment.

326
00:20:28,420 --> 00:20:34,520
And instead of calling the parent and calling for this mobile crisis team to come and evaluate,

327
00:20:34,520 --> 00:20:40,160
who then would have said, no, he just needs to go home with his parent per this protocol.

328
00:20:40,160 --> 00:20:41,160
They didn't call me.

329
00:20:41,160 --> 00:20:44,280
And it's funny because I just came across the police report and she lied on her police

330
00:20:44,280 --> 00:20:45,280
report.

331
00:20:45,280 --> 00:20:47,580
She said she made the principal have called me.

332
00:20:47,580 --> 00:20:52,320
She didn't remember I called you trying to work out where you work as you were missing.

333
00:20:52,320 --> 00:20:56,120
And then I had to call them again to find out that they'd even sent you, but they Baker

334
00:20:56,120 --> 00:20:59,400
acted you 72 hour psychiatric hold.

335
00:20:59,400 --> 00:21:02,080
You didn't actually threaten and put your hands on anyone.

336
00:21:02,080 --> 00:21:04,640
He didn't say that time you're going to hurt yourself.

337
00:21:04,640 --> 00:21:06,920
You were having intrusive thoughts.

338
00:21:06,920 --> 00:21:14,000
And I would say to make it parallel, you've seen me drive when someone almost makes us

339
00:21:14,000 --> 00:21:15,040
crash.

340
00:21:15,040 --> 00:21:19,200
If you climbed in my head, what do you think I want to do to that person?

341
00:21:19,200 --> 00:21:20,200
Beat their ass.

342
00:21:20,200 --> 00:21:21,200
Yeah.

343
00:21:21,200 --> 00:21:22,200
Does that mean I need to go to a psychiatric facility?

344
00:21:22,200 --> 00:21:23,520
You know, how old were you then?

345
00:21:23,520 --> 00:21:24,520
Eight years old, 10?

346
00:21:24,520 --> 00:21:26,520
No, a little bit older than that.

347
00:21:26,520 --> 00:21:27,520
12.

348
00:21:27,520 --> 00:21:28,520
12.

349
00:21:28,520 --> 00:21:29,520
Yeah.

350
00:21:29,520 --> 00:21:30,520
So do I need to be put in a straight jacket?

351
00:21:30,520 --> 00:21:31,520
No, of course not.

352
00:21:31,520 --> 00:21:34,240
This is what happens when someone, you know, is in a certain place, especially if they've

353
00:21:34,240 --> 00:21:36,360
had people picking on them.

354
00:21:36,360 --> 00:21:39,400
So now I don't get a phone call.

355
00:21:39,400 --> 00:21:45,420
I find out that you have been sent because the principal and the SRO school resource

356
00:21:45,420 --> 00:21:50,440
officer who's an absolute piece of shit rather than do the right thing.

357
00:21:50,440 --> 00:21:53,440
Not only did they send you to this.

358
00:21:53,440 --> 00:21:55,040
What do we see when we were there?

359
00:21:55,040 --> 00:22:00,600
I remember seeing some of my friends, I didn't know they had those problems.

360
00:22:00,600 --> 00:22:05,880
Like several, and you're there for 72 hours, so in three days, several other Liberty School

361
00:22:05,880 --> 00:22:11,840
middle school children were going in there being sent, sent, sent, sent, sent.

362
00:22:11,840 --> 00:22:16,200
So this is the thing is that, yes, of course you were going through some emotional issues.

363
00:22:16,200 --> 00:22:17,960
You weren't actively threatening people.

364
00:22:17,960 --> 00:22:22,080
You know, they will ask why you upset and you said, this is what's going on in my head.

365
00:22:22,080 --> 00:22:25,420
This is per your teacher.

366
00:22:25,420 --> 00:22:27,640
And then, you know, they didn't follow the protocols.

367
00:22:27,640 --> 00:22:31,000
They didn't contact the parents and they sent you off.

368
00:22:31,000 --> 00:22:33,160
So this was why it was so negative.

369
00:22:33,160 --> 00:22:36,880
This is why I was so angry and upset is that they kidnapped my child.

370
00:22:36,880 --> 00:22:41,080
And as you know, since then, the laws changed and those two people will be in prison if

371
00:22:41,080 --> 00:22:42,600
they did what they did now.

372
00:22:42,600 --> 00:22:46,080
But they're still teaching and working as police officers, which is disgusting to me.

373
00:22:46,080 --> 00:22:48,600
But that's a separate thing.

374
00:22:48,600 --> 00:22:53,960
So if you can remember, because again, I know it's a while ago now, you're already having

375
00:22:53,960 --> 00:22:56,240
emotional challenges.

376
00:22:56,240 --> 00:22:59,440
Then you get sent to a psych facility for three days.

377
00:22:59,440 --> 00:23:01,240
Did that help your mental health?

378
00:23:01,240 --> 00:23:02,240
Did it make it worse?

379
00:23:02,240 --> 00:23:03,240
Made it worse.

380
00:23:03,240 --> 00:23:09,680
Like, yeah, they made it worse because the second time it made it worse by facing like

381
00:23:09,680 --> 00:23:14,160
remember that whole year's face smile for the second time.

382
00:23:14,160 --> 00:23:16,000
But so I didn't want to go back.

383
00:23:16,000 --> 00:23:20,680
I remember my mom threatened me saying if I go on back, she'll do something.

384
00:23:20,680 --> 00:23:24,080
I don't think I ever told you that.

385
00:23:24,080 --> 00:23:28,200
But the first time I just didn't help.

386
00:23:28,200 --> 00:23:30,480
I don't really remember what else I was thinking.

387
00:23:30,480 --> 00:23:32,520
I just remember I'm glad to be back home.

388
00:23:32,520 --> 00:23:35,800
And that second time, like you said, you had that bad day.

389
00:23:35,800 --> 00:23:37,920
You said you're going to kill yourself.

390
00:23:37,920 --> 00:23:43,760
I applaud your friends for calling and, you know, because that's the right thing to do,

391
00:23:43,760 --> 00:23:46,480
because that time you had said you were going to hurt yourself.

392
00:23:46,480 --> 00:23:48,320
But then the police officer comes here.

393
00:23:48,320 --> 00:23:50,580
I've come home by that point.

394
00:23:50,580 --> 00:23:52,560
So this time we're together.

395
00:23:52,560 --> 00:23:53,800
You're already in a good place.

396
00:23:53,800 --> 00:23:54,920
Now you tell me what happens.

397
00:23:54,920 --> 00:23:56,840
We explained to the police officer.

398
00:23:56,840 --> 00:24:00,680
The police officer was actually going to be like, OK, he's safe with the parent.

399
00:24:00,680 --> 00:24:02,900
You know, he's he's he's good now.

400
00:24:02,900 --> 00:24:07,780
But then he checked with his supervisor and the supervisor again, coming from this not

401
00:24:07,780 --> 00:24:12,520
checking protocol, just told him to take you and off you went again for another 72 hours.

402
00:24:12,520 --> 00:24:14,160
It was only a day.

403
00:24:14,160 --> 00:24:15,640
Well, initially, a 72 hours.

404
00:24:15,640 --> 00:24:16,640
Yeah.

405
00:24:16,640 --> 00:24:18,480
But the consenters were like, why are you back?

406
00:24:18,480 --> 00:24:21,120
You know, we already did this whole workup on you.

407
00:24:21,120 --> 00:24:26,360
So twice in what it was a couple of weeks, I think probably I think it was like March.

408
00:24:26,360 --> 00:24:27,360
OK, yeah.

409
00:24:27,360 --> 00:24:28,640
So yeah.

410
00:24:28,640 --> 00:24:31,600
So then obviously, like I said, fast forward, it's changed now.

411
00:24:31,600 --> 00:24:32,600
The laws changed.

412
00:24:32,600 --> 00:24:37,800
You know, it'll be handed differently because this was the ripple effect of the Parkland

413
00:24:37,800 --> 00:24:42,720
shooting and Marion County just lost their mind or at least that school did.

414
00:24:42,720 --> 00:24:47,160
And rather than have the guts to actually find out what's wrong with the child, they

415
00:24:47,160 --> 00:24:49,200
just kept sending you guys into that.

416
00:24:49,200 --> 00:24:55,220
So it's you know, it's an important thing to talk about, because as you remember, when

417
00:24:55,220 --> 00:25:00,280
I started talking about this, I had teachers coming out saying, I'm so glad you're talking

418
00:25:00,280 --> 00:25:03,640
about it, because there are children that go to the centers and their parents aren't

419
00:25:03,640 --> 00:25:04,920
speaking up about this.

420
00:25:04,920 --> 00:25:07,080
This is happening all the time.

421
00:25:07,080 --> 00:25:13,640
So you know, like I told you, as brutal as it was, as horrible as it was, you going through

422
00:25:13,640 --> 00:25:18,320
it, ultimately you were one of the people that helped stop it so that your friends would

423
00:25:18,320 --> 00:25:20,000
not have to go through this anymore.

424
00:25:20,000 --> 00:25:23,840
And so like I told you, it didn't it nothing but negative.

425
00:25:23,840 --> 00:25:28,200
But if you're going to draw positive from it, you were a part of the change.

426
00:25:28,200 --> 00:25:32,200
I was wondering, because I remember my mom told me after she said I should have lied

427
00:25:32,200 --> 00:25:33,200
to the car.

428
00:25:33,200 --> 00:25:37,200
I was sort of about like saying what I said.

429
00:25:37,200 --> 00:25:41,080
No, I mean, the cop, the cop, like I said, the cop that came to the house did everything

430
00:25:41,080 --> 00:25:42,300
right.

431
00:25:42,300 --> 00:25:47,200
But the problem is you have this, oh, I'll get sued, you know, let's just and we have

432
00:25:47,200 --> 00:25:50,500
it in the same and as a paramedic, or just take everyone to the hospital.

433
00:25:50,500 --> 00:25:54,000
What if what if that rolled ankle is actually a brain bleed?

434
00:25:54,000 --> 00:25:55,120
It doesn't make any sense.

435
00:25:55,120 --> 00:25:59,360
You have to be a big boy and make decisions out in the field, you know, and if a parent

436
00:25:59,360 --> 00:26:04,200
is, you know, talking to you and you can see now that the child isn't upset because I've

437
00:26:04,200 --> 00:26:05,480
said I'm going to kill myself.

438
00:26:05,480 --> 00:26:07,960
I remember that when I was young running out into the farm.

439
00:26:07,960 --> 00:26:09,560
No, no one heard me except sheep.

440
00:26:09,560 --> 00:26:14,320
But I remember that, you know, this is something that teenagers say.

441
00:26:14,320 --> 00:26:18,360
And yes, you have to take it seriously, you know, but if a parent then is, you know, with

442
00:26:18,360 --> 00:26:22,400
them and they're obviously not upset anymore and they explain, look, someone just made

443
00:26:22,400 --> 00:26:25,840
me upset on the on the bus and I didn't mean to say it was just what you told them.

444
00:26:25,840 --> 00:26:28,640
You said I said it, but I didn't mean it.

445
00:26:28,640 --> 00:26:30,320
That's a different conversation completely.

446
00:26:30,320 --> 00:26:33,960
You can't just lock up every child that gets upset.

447
00:26:33,960 --> 00:26:36,680
So yeah, I agree.

448
00:26:36,680 --> 00:26:37,680
Well then moving on.

449
00:26:37,680 --> 00:26:42,720
So so, you know, obviously that wasn't the most fun of your entire schooling, you know,

450
00:26:42,720 --> 00:26:44,920
journey so far.

451
00:26:44,920 --> 00:26:46,720
Let's talk about high school.

452
00:26:46,720 --> 00:26:48,800
We'll talk about something funny.

453
00:26:48,800 --> 00:26:53,920
So what were you hearing about high school when you were in middle school?

454
00:26:53,920 --> 00:26:59,480
That's export, that was a nickname, there was a lot of sex, but it's more like vape

455
00:26:59,480 --> 00:27:05,960
for in drugs more, I guess, because I see a lot of AP, a lot of like pens, I think it's

456
00:27:05,960 --> 00:27:06,960
called something.

457
00:27:06,960 --> 00:27:11,520
But so that's actually a huge problem, but not a lot of shagging.

458
00:27:11,520 --> 00:27:12,520
Yeah.

459
00:27:12,520 --> 00:27:13,520
And then fighting too, wasn't it?

460
00:27:13,520 --> 00:27:14,520
Yeah.

461
00:27:14,520 --> 00:27:16,400
You heard that it was like a gang warfare zone.

462
00:27:16,400 --> 00:27:19,560
And so I just remember laughing because I remember you telling me that.

463
00:27:19,560 --> 00:27:20,560
I'm like, don't think it is.

464
00:27:20,560 --> 00:27:23,120
Ethan went there and I don't remember him talking about much.

465
00:27:23,120 --> 00:27:29,200
He punched a couple of people, but they were asking for it, from what I understand.

466
00:27:29,200 --> 00:27:32,440
So then let's kind of get into high school level.

467
00:27:32,440 --> 00:27:36,760
Firstly, let's talk about high school sports, because you did that almost straight away,

468
00:27:36,760 --> 00:27:37,760
didn't you?

469
00:27:37,760 --> 00:27:44,160
So let's talk about kind of, you know, cross and then and then track, like, you know, as

470
00:27:44,160 --> 00:27:46,600
far of all these things that are good and that are good.

471
00:27:46,600 --> 00:27:51,560
Oh, my God, can't even talk that are healthy for you that you enjoyed versus some of the

472
00:27:51,560 --> 00:27:55,720
stresses. How important was sports for you?

473
00:27:55,720 --> 00:27:57,760
It was distraction, I guess.

474
00:27:57,760 --> 00:28:00,400
Like it helps me just have more friends.

475
00:28:00,400 --> 00:28:04,920
Like I used to be very shy my freshman year now, not at all.

476
00:28:04,920 --> 00:28:07,720
And I think it just helps me grow better.

477
00:28:07,720 --> 00:28:08,720
It showed me discipline.

478
00:28:08,720 --> 00:28:09,720
It showed me dedication.

479
00:28:09,720 --> 00:28:12,440
Like if you want to do this, you have to work.

480
00:28:12,440 --> 00:28:14,440
You have to put the work in.

481
00:28:14,440 --> 00:28:16,280
And I think it was just amazing.

482
00:28:16,280 --> 00:28:20,280
And I don't really remember freshman year, but sophomore year, I remember dedication,

483
00:28:20,280 --> 00:28:21,920
dedication, you have to work, you have to work.

484
00:28:21,920 --> 00:28:26,160
So that's when I was getting more notice, especially during track when my coach actually

485
00:28:26,160 --> 00:28:30,720
noticed me and started investing in me and everything.

486
00:28:30,720 --> 00:28:35,080
But the worst thing is like, especially because I think it was last year was when I was very

487
00:28:35,080 --> 00:28:42,120
investment, like Davis coached my event single handedly and he made me get pressure and pressure.

488
00:28:42,120 --> 00:28:45,200
And that's when I had my knee injury and I couldn't run anymore.

489
00:28:45,200 --> 00:28:47,400
I still haven't ran since then.

490
00:28:47,400 --> 00:28:50,280
So talk to me, let's go back.

491
00:28:50,280 --> 00:28:56,320
How important was it for people that weren't your parents to be like mentors, to be the

492
00:28:56,320 --> 00:29:01,040
father or mother figures, whether it was sports or teachers or Jiu-Jitsu coaches?

493
00:29:01,040 --> 00:29:02,960
I think it was really important.

494
00:29:02,960 --> 00:29:07,120
I mean, I was kind of blinded by my own drive.

495
00:29:07,120 --> 00:29:08,720
I didn't care what anyone thought.

496
00:29:08,720 --> 00:29:10,440
I don't care if someone said good job.

497
00:29:10,440 --> 00:29:13,520
If it wasn't good for me, I didn't want to care about their opinion.

498
00:29:13,520 --> 00:29:17,800
So I think it was really helpful, but also I was very blinded by my own.

499
00:29:17,800 --> 00:29:18,800
And I still am.

500
00:29:18,800 --> 00:29:21,200
I still am the kind of person I am.

501
00:29:21,200 --> 00:29:25,120
If I'm not satisfied, I don't really care what anyone else says.

502
00:29:25,120 --> 00:29:27,520
Do you remember when that was almost unhealthy though?

503
00:29:27,520 --> 00:29:30,640
Remember when you were succeeding really well and you wouldn't let yourself acknowledge,

504
00:29:30,640 --> 00:29:32,800
you always say, oh, I should have run faster.

505
00:29:32,800 --> 00:29:36,120
I had left stuff left in the tank.

506
00:29:36,120 --> 00:29:39,680
So it can be a good driver, but it can also be negative if you're never happy.

507
00:29:39,680 --> 00:29:41,600
You know what I mean?

508
00:29:41,600 --> 00:29:46,120
So it's a kind of dangerous place in one way, isn't it?

509
00:29:46,120 --> 00:29:48,000
So what about earning Davis?

510
00:29:48,000 --> 00:29:50,280
So Davis was your track coach.

511
00:29:50,280 --> 00:29:55,920
Talk to me about him not paying you any attention and having to earn his respect and then how

512
00:29:55,920 --> 00:29:56,920
that shifted.

513
00:29:56,920 --> 00:30:01,480
Like I said, I don't really remember freshman year, but sophomore year I remember I won

514
00:30:01,480 --> 00:30:02,480
races.

515
00:30:02,480 --> 00:30:05,760
The first race I won, I think that's the most aerosol smile.

516
00:30:05,760 --> 00:30:07,360
It was amazing.

517
00:30:07,360 --> 00:30:11,360
But one thing I always do is after like hard work, I would just only go out, like make

518
00:30:11,360 --> 00:30:15,400
eye contact with him or like kind of like glare at him, but not like a mean way, but

519
00:30:15,400 --> 00:30:16,400
show him like I did that.

520
00:30:16,400 --> 00:30:19,000
Notice me kind of thing and he'll look back.

521
00:30:19,000 --> 00:30:23,520
And I think that's one thing I did is like I showed him like I'm doing something like

522
00:30:23,520 --> 00:30:25,880
acknowledge me kind of thing.

523
00:30:25,880 --> 00:30:30,040
But in each show that like I put in the work, I did a miles, like I always proved to him

524
00:30:30,040 --> 00:30:32,760
I did something like morning miles I had to do.

525
00:30:32,760 --> 00:30:35,440
I showed him that I ran my weekly miles.

526
00:30:35,440 --> 00:30:40,320
So I was probably like 55, I think weekly was my mileage.

527
00:30:40,320 --> 00:30:43,520
So I just made him notice me.

528
00:30:43,520 --> 00:30:44,960
And then what about the teams?

529
00:30:44,960 --> 00:30:49,600
I mean, I think I said this to you across country and track and that, you know, obviously

530
00:30:49,600 --> 00:30:51,560
volleyball will be the next thing.

531
00:30:51,560 --> 00:30:58,920
I am so impressed by the sportsmanship and the camaraderie, you know, the support of

532
00:30:58,920 --> 00:31:00,720
the teams that I've watched you play for.

533
00:31:00,720 --> 00:31:03,240
When like you obviously you were a one miler.

534
00:31:03,240 --> 00:31:08,240
So a lot of the short events went first, be at all your teammates would be there waiting

535
00:31:08,240 --> 00:31:10,520
for you and watching and cheering you on.

536
00:31:10,520 --> 00:31:14,320
So talk to me about that team element that you found in some of those sports.

537
00:31:14,320 --> 00:31:18,280
I think especially during track, like it was very like social because it was just like

538
00:31:18,280 --> 00:31:23,400
16 of us maybe like, man, probably a little less like 12.

539
00:31:23,400 --> 00:31:27,320
And we were all talking like because especially like sophomore year I was talking to everybody

540
00:31:27,320 --> 00:31:28,600
because we all knew each other.

541
00:31:28,600 --> 00:31:34,240
Cross country wasn't as social because it was more people running because it's not just

542
00:31:34,240 --> 00:31:36,600
it's one event, just a 5k.

543
00:31:36,600 --> 00:31:41,320
I remember varsity and junior, but I think of one thing that was like, well, we do is

544
00:31:41,320 --> 00:31:43,920
like if you disapointed us, we lie.

545
00:31:43,920 --> 00:31:46,240
So like I remember one kid, he was being very mean.

546
00:31:46,240 --> 00:31:48,760
I said, oh, like I'm very bad at this sport.

547
00:31:48,760 --> 00:31:50,440
I'm like, good luck though.

548
00:31:50,440 --> 00:31:51,440
Then I beat him.

549
00:31:51,440 --> 00:31:55,560
So I lied about my like, ability.

550
00:31:55,560 --> 00:31:56,560
Yeah.

551
00:31:56,560 --> 00:31:58,600
And it's funny because you see him.

552
00:31:58,600 --> 00:32:02,280
It's like I saw him because I was just like staring him when I ran back because that's

553
00:32:02,280 --> 00:32:03,280
one thing I really had.

554
00:32:03,280 --> 00:32:04,280
It was a good kick.

555
00:32:04,280 --> 00:32:08,760
I mean, after 400 meter last, I'll just sprint and it hurt a lot.

556
00:32:08,760 --> 00:32:10,560
But that's one thing I used to do.

557
00:32:10,560 --> 00:32:15,280
Well, also, I mean, I remember as well, the sportsmanship between your team and different

558
00:32:15,280 --> 00:32:20,880
teams, you know, and you see some adults, you know, just fighting in sports stands and

559
00:32:20,880 --> 00:32:26,720
being complete a-holes to each other about sports teams or political parties or whatever.

560
00:32:26,720 --> 00:32:32,420
But what I witnessed usually is all you guys at the one mile is all like, you know, slapping

561
00:32:32,420 --> 00:32:35,280
hands and then at the end saying good job.

562
00:32:35,280 --> 00:32:39,640
So what did you find as far as the interaction of other schools when you were competing?

563
00:32:39,640 --> 00:32:46,600
Yeah, like I said, like I think it was Bellevue, Forest, the other high schools in Marion County.

564
00:32:46,600 --> 00:32:47,600
We all talked.

565
00:32:47,600 --> 00:32:50,680
We all talked to each other because we're all kind of like rivals.

566
00:32:50,680 --> 00:32:52,640
We're all kind of equal.

567
00:32:52,640 --> 00:32:58,200
I think I was ahead by a couple of seconds, but they were way better at two mile because

568
00:32:58,200 --> 00:33:02,760
they all did cross country and I wasn't as good, even though it was varsity.

569
00:33:02,760 --> 00:33:05,120
Wasn't my favorite sport.

570
00:33:05,120 --> 00:33:10,360
But especially in the mile, it was just fun and everything.

571
00:33:10,360 --> 00:33:13,600
And like talking about like that thing, I think it's baseball is the worst sport with

572
00:33:13,600 --> 00:33:15,040
that thing I heard.

573
00:33:15,040 --> 00:33:17,760
Like such like travel and everything.

574
00:33:17,760 --> 00:33:22,160
But one thing I think is this sport isn't for the pity.

575
00:33:22,160 --> 00:33:23,880
Like we are fit.

576
00:33:23,880 --> 00:33:25,320
We are active.

577
00:33:25,320 --> 00:33:29,040
We are mentally breaking sport.

578
00:33:29,040 --> 00:33:32,400
And so if someone talks crap, go get them like she was run.

579
00:33:32,400 --> 00:33:36,720
You can't like this kind of way we think.

580
00:33:36,720 --> 00:33:43,880
Well speaking of that, I watched, you know, you cross country and then track and, you

581
00:33:43,880 --> 00:33:46,920
know, like I said, kind of working your way up.

582
00:33:46,920 --> 00:33:52,800
But then there was a shift from a parent's eyes watching you where the talk began to

583
00:33:52,800 --> 00:33:54,840
be all about scholarships all the time.

584
00:33:54,840 --> 00:33:55,840
I've got to get this.

585
00:33:55,840 --> 00:33:59,400
I've got to get a D1 scholarship, D1 school.

586
00:33:59,400 --> 00:34:02,480
What was the good thing about chasing that scholarship?

587
00:34:02,480 --> 00:34:07,000
But then also let's talk about the maybe the extra stress or the, you know, the too much

588
00:34:07,000 --> 00:34:12,320
stress of the scholarship versus enjoying the sport itself.

589
00:34:12,320 --> 00:34:19,840
I mean, I think the scholarship was mainly just like, so say UF is probably the best

590
00:34:19,840 --> 00:34:21,920
track team, one of them at least.

591
00:34:21,920 --> 00:34:25,680
And I think it's just so cool just seeing how much is travel and just like that brotherhood

592
00:34:25,680 --> 00:34:26,680
and sisterhood.

593
00:34:26,680 --> 00:34:29,040
So I think that's one thing I was writing for a scholarship.

594
00:34:29,040 --> 00:34:32,840
But main reason was, of course, just money because you guys still carry me long enough.

595
00:34:32,840 --> 00:34:34,440
I didn't want you guys pay at all.

596
00:34:34,440 --> 00:34:40,040
And I'm still thriving for scholarships just for academics and non academic scholarships,

597
00:34:40,040 --> 00:34:43,280
like clubs and raising that, which I found already.

598
00:34:43,280 --> 00:34:45,360
But I just it was an unhealthy session.

599
00:34:45,360 --> 00:34:49,600
Like, I mean, because I still like the sport, but I think such after my injury, it was like

600
00:34:49,600 --> 00:34:50,600
a chore.

601
00:34:50,600 --> 00:34:53,400
And it hurt so much because it's not a fun sport.

602
00:34:53,400 --> 00:34:55,080
You don't have fun.

603
00:34:55,080 --> 00:34:56,920
You work out and it hurts.

604
00:34:56,920 --> 00:35:03,040
I remember crying sometimes because one of the hardest workouts I ever done was my repeats

605
00:35:03,040 --> 00:35:05,640
for three times and it was five thirty mile.

606
00:35:05,640 --> 00:35:07,480
Some people can't run that for once.

607
00:35:07,480 --> 00:35:08,800
You're sitting across from one.

608
00:35:08,800 --> 00:35:13,080
Yeah, I can do like a seven mile maybe, maybe on a good day.

609
00:35:13,080 --> 00:35:15,160
But yeah, we went like five minute rest.

610
00:35:15,160 --> 00:35:18,160
I remember it was hard.

611
00:35:18,160 --> 00:35:22,240
So then let's talk about that.

612
00:35:22,240 --> 00:35:25,280
So you have this in your your mind.

613
00:35:25,280 --> 00:35:31,160
Obviously there was that mental tug of war like I like running, but I hate the pain and

614
00:35:31,160 --> 00:35:38,640
you know, and then obviously if it's an external motivation, meaning a thing outside of yourself,

615
00:35:38,640 --> 00:35:42,120
it's a lot harder to train and be good than if it's something like burning in your heart.

616
00:35:42,120 --> 00:35:46,800
Like I want to be the best, you know, because I want to be the best, not because of a scholarship.

617
00:35:46,800 --> 00:35:52,760
So what started happening happening physically and then talk to me about not being able to

618
00:35:52,760 --> 00:35:55,360
run anymore and what that did?

619
00:35:55,360 --> 00:35:57,680
I mean, just physically, like my knee gave out on me.

620
00:35:57,680 --> 00:36:02,720
I remember one time at my mom's apartment because it's a two story or like the one you

621
00:36:02,720 --> 00:36:04,680
had to go upstairs to go to the second thing.

622
00:36:04,680 --> 00:36:09,400
My knee fell out and had to crawl upstairs with my arms because my knee wasn't working

623
00:36:09,400 --> 00:36:12,200
and I couldn't go up.

624
00:36:12,200 --> 00:36:17,160
I fell doing like a 10 mile because my knee just gave out.

625
00:36:17,160 --> 00:36:18,160
That hurt a lot.

626
00:36:18,160 --> 00:36:22,960
I remember just like I started crying and punched my knee and like, God damn it, why

627
00:36:22,960 --> 00:36:28,360
I'm only 15 years old and I can't run or like 16, I guess.

628
00:36:28,360 --> 00:36:31,480
It was just it was mind blowing because my body is like broken.

629
00:36:31,480 --> 00:36:38,680
I'm only still a teenager because I overworked myself because the distance crew, we probably

630
00:36:38,680 --> 00:36:40,360
do the most with my little Jilly.

631
00:36:40,360 --> 00:36:46,640
I mean, that's a fact, like I said, we ran 55 miles or I did 55 miles a week morning

632
00:36:46,640 --> 00:36:50,040
and afternoon and destroyed my body.

633
00:36:50,040 --> 00:36:51,040
Yeah.

634
00:36:51,040 --> 00:36:54,880
I mean, this is what I'm just talking about this day on the podcast and I wasn't really

635
00:36:54,880 --> 00:36:59,640
aware of the overuse because you think of it more as you know, like baseball throwing

636
00:36:59,640 --> 00:37:03,760
and you know, basketball jumping and you know, those kind of things.

637
00:37:03,760 --> 00:37:07,680
But you know, when you think about it, running is a very natural movement.

638
00:37:07,680 --> 00:37:10,960
But yeah, I think it because it happened right when you had your growth spurt, didn't it?

639
00:37:10,960 --> 00:37:15,920
So I don't think that your body was ready for that volume of training when it was going

640
00:37:15,920 --> 00:37:17,840
through that growth stage.

641
00:37:17,840 --> 00:37:21,560
Yeah, because they didn't see anything.

642
00:37:21,560 --> 00:37:25,160
Like I think it was your tightness was in my foot, but it's because I have a higher

643
00:37:25,160 --> 00:37:30,800
arch and so it was like a little leak in my foot, I think from just like the overuse of

644
00:37:30,800 --> 00:37:38,680
my foot from running and not having the right platform, insoles.

645
00:37:38,680 --> 00:37:43,520
But my knees, they've probably growing pain and I hate it because I was doing that.

646
00:37:43,520 --> 00:37:47,600
That's the only probably the only reason or biggest reason why I stayed in track cross

647
00:37:47,600 --> 00:37:48,880
country because I was good at it.

648
00:37:48,880 --> 00:37:50,360
I had a purpose in it.

649
00:37:50,360 --> 00:37:53,320
I mean, you had about a sub five mile, didn't you?

650
00:37:53,320 --> 00:37:55,920
451 was my time.

651
00:37:55,920 --> 00:37:56,920
So it was awesome.

652
00:37:56,920 --> 00:38:05,680
I invested in it, I worked hard, didn't miss practice rarely, even ran sick and it hurt.

653
00:38:05,680 --> 00:38:07,680
I couldn't breathe sometimes.

654
00:38:07,680 --> 00:38:08,680
Yeah.

655
00:38:08,680 --> 00:38:10,200
So, so talk to me about that.

656
00:38:10,200 --> 00:38:13,880
Now your, your legs start hurting and your foot starts hurting to the point where you

657
00:38:13,880 --> 00:38:15,480
just can't run anymore.

658
00:38:15,480 --> 00:38:16,480
You know, you physically can't.

659
00:38:16,480 --> 00:38:19,480
And it's funny because we're sitting here and as you know, I'm getting ready for my

660
00:38:19,480 --> 00:38:23,640
first and only marathon and my knees have been playing up and I know exactly what you

661
00:38:23,640 --> 00:38:24,640
talking about.

662
00:38:24,640 --> 00:38:26,880
It's just brutal.

663
00:38:26,880 --> 00:38:29,960
So you fought so hard to be on this team.

664
00:38:29,960 --> 00:38:33,720
You fought so hard to, you know, to perform well for your team.

665
00:38:33,720 --> 00:38:37,480
You were thinking about scholarships to colleges and then you can't run anymore.

666
00:38:37,480 --> 00:38:42,200
What was that like having, you know, gained the respect of Davis you admired?

667
00:38:42,200 --> 00:38:46,720
Like what impact did that have mentally on you as you, cause you are identified as a

668
00:38:46,720 --> 00:38:50,280
varsity runner for your school for a couple of years?

669
00:38:50,280 --> 00:38:55,440
I think I don't know what the word is, not delusional, but maybe like blinded.

670
00:38:55,440 --> 00:38:57,200
Like I was telling Davis like, Oh yeah, I'm ready.

671
00:38:57,200 --> 00:38:58,200
I'm ready.

672
00:38:58,200 --> 00:38:59,200
But I wasn't.

673
00:38:59,200 --> 00:39:00,720
And I was acting like I didn't care.

674
00:39:00,720 --> 00:39:04,560
I mean, that was so jealous when I saw like the Instagram post and, or just hearing the

675
00:39:04,560 --> 00:39:10,680
races and I was smiling, but inside I was so frustrated and so tired because the thing

676
00:39:10,680 --> 00:39:13,080
about my knees, I was probably fine with my lungs.

677
00:39:13,080 --> 00:39:19,240
Like I trained so much that my breathing and mental thing was amazing just to hurt so much.

678
00:39:19,240 --> 00:39:23,080
And I think that was so frustrating that these runs weren't hard.

679
00:39:23,080 --> 00:39:27,320
But I, of course, some of them were, but like long distance ones, it was fine.

680
00:39:27,320 --> 00:39:33,440
But he wasn't letting me be the runner I was.

681
00:39:33,440 --> 00:39:37,160
So what about, let's go to ROTC.

682
00:39:37,160 --> 00:39:41,320
So firstly, I think this is a really important point.

683
00:39:41,320 --> 00:39:45,920
Talk to me about why you started ROTC and then we'll talk about, you know, again, the

684
00:39:45,920 --> 00:39:48,880
good and the bad, the bad of the shoes, the shoes, which is one of the reasons why your

685
00:39:48,880 --> 00:39:51,320
feet weren't doing so well running.

686
00:39:51,320 --> 00:39:55,320
But talk to me about the origin story of you signing up for it.

687
00:39:55,320 --> 00:40:00,080
Because we've been to Parents Day, what, four weeks before and you just walked right by.

688
00:40:00,080 --> 00:40:03,000
I'm not rudely, but you just didn't show any interest in that program.

689
00:40:03,000 --> 00:40:07,880
So talk to me about the first few weeks, PE and then how you found yourself changing.

690
00:40:07,880 --> 00:40:14,440
Well, going into it is not that horrible because I just hated my PE teacher.

691
00:40:14,440 --> 00:40:16,200
So it's not that really.

692
00:40:16,200 --> 00:40:19,720
But do you remember what you said to me though?

693
00:40:19,720 --> 00:40:20,720
Not really.

694
00:40:20,720 --> 00:40:21,720
I guess this is what I'm forgetting.

695
00:40:21,720 --> 00:40:25,120
This was, you know, three and a half years ago now.

696
00:40:25,120 --> 00:40:31,480
You came home one day and you said, Dad, I joined JROTC.

697
00:40:31,480 --> 00:40:37,280
You said, I've been in PE for three weeks now and we haven't done any exercise.

698
00:40:37,280 --> 00:40:42,560
So I think that was what you were frustrated as you'd watched movies and done, you know,

699
00:40:42,560 --> 00:40:47,260
like classes in PE, but you hadn't actually done any PE, any activities.

700
00:40:47,260 --> 00:40:50,080
So that's what I remember as you did.

701
00:40:50,080 --> 00:40:54,480
Yeah, I do actually remember that because we just did like a lot of health stuff.

702
00:40:54,480 --> 00:40:57,360
It was simple.

703
00:40:57,360 --> 00:41:00,320
But yeah, so I went into JROTC.

704
00:41:00,320 --> 00:41:02,320
I was that freshman.

705
00:41:02,320 --> 00:41:06,680
I was very like anxious and saying so sorry because it was new.

706
00:41:06,680 --> 00:41:08,840
I wasn't used to getting shout out like that.

707
00:41:08,840 --> 00:41:10,520
So I was like, okay.

708
00:41:10,520 --> 00:41:12,320
But I followed, I was disciplined.

709
00:41:12,320 --> 00:41:15,160
I practiced a lot because we had to do drill.

710
00:41:15,160 --> 00:41:18,240
So faces, all that stuff.

711
00:41:18,240 --> 00:41:21,780
And I get it and we won our company.

712
00:41:21,780 --> 00:41:24,160
So we did like school trip, but that doesn't really matter.

713
00:41:24,160 --> 00:41:28,520
But it was it was brotherhood and everybody, especially when I went to the military camp

714
00:41:28,520 --> 00:41:32,360
called JCLC as like leadership camp.

715
00:41:32,360 --> 00:41:33,720
And that was brutal.

716
00:41:33,720 --> 00:41:40,120
Though I remember that that was the first time I had, not first time, but first time

717
00:41:40,120 --> 00:41:47,320
in a long time that I had homesickness because we woke up at 530 a.m. for a week straight

718
00:41:47,320 --> 00:41:50,400
doing rappelling, doing all this military stuff.

719
00:41:50,400 --> 00:41:52,160
And that was brutal.

720
00:41:52,160 --> 00:41:57,280
Do you remember how we prepared to get you ready for the rappelling in the heights?

721
00:41:57,280 --> 00:41:58,920
We did the warrior of course.

722
00:41:58,920 --> 00:41:59,920
Yeah.

723
00:41:59,920 --> 00:42:01,240
What's it called?

724
00:42:01,240 --> 00:42:04,560
Savage Race that was at the go rock games.

725
00:42:04,560 --> 00:42:07,000
Even though that didn't help at all.

726
00:42:07,000 --> 00:42:09,280
That triangle thing was like 20 feet.

727
00:42:09,280 --> 00:42:11,640
The rappelling was 85 feet.

728
00:42:11,640 --> 00:42:13,720
And I remember like mentally I was like, I'm going to do this.

729
00:42:13,720 --> 00:42:14,720
I'm going to do this.

730
00:42:14,720 --> 00:42:18,480
And like because you had to like loosen the grip and jump.

731
00:42:18,480 --> 00:42:19,480
My grip wasn't losing.

732
00:42:19,480 --> 00:42:20,480
And I was trying to.

733
00:42:20,480 --> 00:42:22,600
I couldn't loosen my grip.

734
00:42:22,600 --> 00:42:25,320
It was weird because like mentally I was like, yes, let's do this.

735
00:42:25,320 --> 00:42:28,080
But I guess my mind was like, no.

736
00:42:28,080 --> 00:42:33,840
Though I told you when we did adventure camp, I'm almost certain that I didn't even go

737
00:42:33,840 --> 00:42:34,840
rappelling.

738
00:42:34,840 --> 00:42:35,840
We had rappelling there.

739
00:42:35,840 --> 00:42:37,480
I'm sure everyone else did it.

740
00:42:37,480 --> 00:42:38,480
I didn't go over.

741
00:42:38,480 --> 00:42:39,480
I refused.

742
00:42:39,480 --> 00:42:40,760
I was too scared of heights.

743
00:42:40,760 --> 00:42:45,840
So obviously years later I did rappelling, fire service and stunts and stuff.

744
00:42:45,840 --> 00:42:49,400
So that's why I was saying, because you also climbed one of those telegraph poles, didn't

745
00:42:49,400 --> 00:42:50,400
you?

746
00:42:50,400 --> 00:42:52,080
The wooden poles to stand on the top.

747
00:42:52,080 --> 00:42:53,800
So real like confidence course stuff.

748
00:42:53,800 --> 00:42:56,880
I got rope burn from that because I fell in the burn.

749
00:42:56,880 --> 00:42:59,280
Then we ate snake.

750
00:42:59,280 --> 00:43:00,280
That was pretty good.

751
00:43:00,280 --> 00:43:01,280
And frog.

752
00:43:01,280 --> 00:43:04,080
But frog I had in France I think or something.

753
00:43:04,080 --> 00:43:05,080
And snails.

754
00:43:05,080 --> 00:43:07,320
But it was really fun.

755
00:43:07,320 --> 00:43:11,280
We did like salad tray stuff and that was easy.

756
00:43:11,280 --> 00:43:13,320
We had like a rest day.

757
00:43:13,320 --> 00:43:14,320
So a pool day.

758
00:43:14,320 --> 00:43:19,280
We did during that pool day and light day, we did like how to have a life vest with your

759
00:43:19,280 --> 00:43:20,280
pants.

760
00:43:20,280 --> 00:43:23,560
It was actually really cool.

761
00:43:23,560 --> 00:43:25,560
And we did like high copes and low copes.

762
00:43:25,560 --> 00:43:31,040
So low copes you have to climb little walls, do leadership things to find how to solve

763
00:43:31,040 --> 00:43:34,280
these different physical activities.

764
00:43:34,280 --> 00:43:37,000
And high copes was like zip lining, all that kind of stuff.

765
00:43:37,000 --> 00:43:38,360
So really scary.

766
00:43:38,360 --> 00:43:43,200
But it was funny because like they said, I said, sir, give me a song to sing.

767
00:43:43,200 --> 00:43:44,920
And I was singing it to boost my confidence.

768
00:43:44,920 --> 00:43:46,240
He said sing Barbie girl.

769
00:43:46,240 --> 00:43:47,240
I said I'm a Barbie girl.

770
00:43:47,240 --> 00:43:48,240
And I just shut up.

771
00:43:48,240 --> 00:43:52,440
And like I'm like in the athletic high I guess because I just don't memorize.

772
00:43:52,440 --> 00:43:54,520
I just remember going up the ladder.

773
00:43:54,520 --> 00:43:56,040
Oh you sang when you were climbing?

774
00:43:56,040 --> 00:43:57,040
Yeah.

775
00:43:57,040 --> 00:43:59,480
But then I just shut up after I touched it because I was like focused or something.

776
00:43:59,480 --> 00:44:00,480
And I was weird.

777
00:44:00,480 --> 00:44:01,480
I'm like oh wait I didn't sing it.

778
00:44:01,480 --> 00:44:03,680
I was in the zone or something.

779
00:44:03,680 --> 00:44:04,680
So that was the very same.

780
00:44:04,680 --> 00:44:07,320
It was the first time everyone was zip lining too.

781
00:44:07,320 --> 00:44:08,320
It was really fun.

782
00:44:08,320 --> 00:44:11,840
But yeah, I just remember the worst thing was just sleep.

783
00:44:11,840 --> 00:44:12,840
It was so hot too.

784
00:44:12,840 --> 00:44:14,520
And I didn't prepare for the heat.

785
00:44:14,520 --> 00:44:16,480
I just had PJs.

786
00:44:16,480 --> 00:44:20,680
So it's especially because it's the Florida summer too.

787
00:44:20,680 --> 00:44:23,280
What do you remember about simply being uncomfortable?

788
00:44:23,280 --> 00:44:28,120
Because I told you I grew up on a farm and it was cold and it was wet and I have to be

789
00:44:28,120 --> 00:44:33,880
up, lambing sheep and feeding geese and all kinds of stuff, mucking out stables.

790
00:44:33,880 --> 00:44:36,080
I was just talking to someone the other day.

791
00:44:36,080 --> 00:44:40,960
It's hard for us to replicate that for you because life is very comfortable these days.

792
00:44:40,960 --> 00:44:42,640
And that's a good thing.

793
00:44:42,640 --> 00:44:46,440
But what we need to do then is find times where you're uncomfortable.

794
00:44:46,440 --> 00:44:51,600
There's obviously a lot of families that go camping or hunting or hiking, whatever it

795
00:44:51,600 --> 00:44:52,600
is.

796
00:44:52,600 --> 00:44:58,080
But I would say that JCLC was one of the only times for you because we haven't done much

797
00:44:58,080 --> 00:45:03,080
like that where you really were gone for a few days and you were uncomfortable.

798
00:45:03,080 --> 00:45:04,080
You were hot.

799
00:45:04,080 --> 00:45:05,080
There were mosquitoes.

800
00:45:05,080 --> 00:45:10,840
So how important was that to realize that sometimes it does suck?

801
00:45:10,840 --> 00:45:15,280
I mean, I'm especially now I'm comfy being uncomfortable.

802
00:45:15,280 --> 00:45:17,720
But the thing is, it's just sleep.

803
00:45:17,720 --> 00:45:21,040
I am fit now, at least.

804
00:45:21,040 --> 00:45:22,800
I can go through activities.

805
00:45:22,800 --> 00:45:24,760
I can push past my limits.

806
00:45:24,760 --> 00:45:26,920
Like when I get home, just break.

807
00:45:26,920 --> 00:45:29,880
But my sleep, I couldn't think straight.

808
00:45:29,880 --> 00:45:34,880
I think that's the thing that was so strong, was like I was mentally broken.

809
00:45:34,880 --> 00:45:37,200
Not like depression or anything, but like just sleep and everything.

810
00:45:37,200 --> 00:45:41,320
I think that's the thing that I didn't like being comfy was like the physical side.

811
00:45:41,320 --> 00:45:42,500
I loved it.

812
00:45:42,500 --> 00:45:46,200
But the sleep and everything was horrible.

813
00:45:46,200 --> 00:45:51,040
You know, I talk about sleep a lot.

814
00:45:51,040 --> 00:45:56,000
Ever since you were a baby, when you know, mum and I were together, we put you to bed

815
00:45:56,000 --> 00:46:01,120
at nine because I remember just thinking these parents that put their babies to bed earlier,

816
00:46:01,120 --> 00:46:02,920
that means that they're going to wake up earlier.

817
00:46:02,920 --> 00:46:05,720
So that parent wakes up at two or three in the morning.

818
00:46:05,720 --> 00:46:10,640
So my whole thing was, well, if we put them to bed at nine, as you sleep longer, now you're

819
00:46:10,640 --> 00:46:11,840
going to be waking up at five.

820
00:46:11,840 --> 00:46:12,840
Well, five is not too bad.

821
00:46:12,840 --> 00:46:15,800
I can, you know, get up and stay up at five.

822
00:46:15,800 --> 00:46:19,200
But we kept it at nine pretty much until very recently, didn't we?

823
00:46:19,200 --> 00:46:24,480
So just I don't know if you know if there's any way of you really observing this, but

824
00:46:24,480 --> 00:46:28,400
you know, talk to me about your perception of sleep.

825
00:46:28,400 --> 00:46:32,360
Have you noticed like it's harder in school if you haven't slept or, you know, because

826
00:46:32,360 --> 00:46:38,480
we've kept you at that nine a.m., which usually gives you nine, 10 hours of sleep every night.

827
00:46:38,480 --> 00:46:43,480
Sleep is very weird because even if I have good sleep, I'm still tired.

828
00:46:43,480 --> 00:46:48,040
But I think the main difference is when I have good sleep, I'm tired in the morning,

829
00:46:48,040 --> 00:46:49,980
but really awake in the afternoon.

830
00:46:49,980 --> 00:46:54,640
But if I have zero sleep, I'm not tired in the morning, but very tired in the afternoon.

831
00:46:54,640 --> 00:46:56,000
So that's the thing I've noticed.

832
00:46:56,000 --> 00:47:02,020
But I'm always tired for some reason, even with 10 hours of sleep or with six, seven

833
00:47:02,020 --> 00:47:03,020
hours of sleep.

834
00:47:03,020 --> 00:47:04,920
It's usually like way over five.

835
00:47:04,920 --> 00:47:07,880
Well, teenagers are naturally tired.

836
00:47:07,880 --> 00:47:11,240
If you look it up, they need like a lot of sleep because you guys are growing and then

837
00:47:11,240 --> 00:47:15,760
you're having all this information crammed in because obviously it's more stressful the

838
00:47:15,760 --> 00:47:20,580
older you get, especially if you're thinking about your senior year and graduating.

839
00:47:20,580 --> 00:47:24,840
And then you've got, at the moment, you've got your sports and your volleyball is getting

840
00:47:24,840 --> 00:47:27,720
you home at what, 10.30 at night at the moment.

841
00:47:27,720 --> 00:47:29,760
So that's all factoring in too.

842
00:47:29,760 --> 00:47:32,200
But yeah, but I understand what you're saying.

843
00:47:32,200 --> 00:47:35,560
I think I've felt rested for about 20 years now.

844
00:47:35,560 --> 00:47:37,680
I've woken up.

845
00:47:37,680 --> 00:47:45,360
I want to go back to another kind of important thing that you probably can remember somewhat

846
00:47:45,360 --> 00:47:53,440
vividly, but as a middle schooler, what was the pandemic like?

847
00:47:53,440 --> 00:47:57,040
And it doesn't just have to be school, just in general, even coming back, like talk to

848
00:47:57,040 --> 00:48:04,040
me about that whole experience through, you know, because you were what 14?

849
00:48:04,040 --> 00:48:05,040
Same year as Sanders.

850
00:48:05,040 --> 00:48:06,040
Oh, okay.

851
00:48:06,040 --> 00:48:07,040
So 12.

852
00:48:07,040 --> 00:48:08,040
Yeah.

853
00:48:08,040 --> 00:48:09,040
Okay.

854
00:48:09,040 --> 00:48:10,040
I got that wrong then.

855
00:48:10,040 --> 00:48:11,840
So yeah, so a 12 year old child, just, you know, what do you remember about that?

856
00:48:11,840 --> 00:48:14,320
The good and the bad.

857
00:48:14,320 --> 00:48:15,920
The good course, not going to school.

858
00:48:15,920 --> 00:48:16,920
That was amazing.

859
00:48:16,920 --> 00:48:20,040
But the bad, which is everything will kind of slow down.

860
00:48:20,040 --> 00:48:25,520
And like, because as you know, I'm in several college classes right now.

861
00:48:25,520 --> 00:48:29,960
And that's one thing I was thinking was that we haven't had brotherhood since 9-11.

862
00:48:29,960 --> 00:48:31,960
It's a fact.

863
00:48:31,960 --> 00:48:38,000
But COVID-19, I thought maybe we could have had brotherhood, but we separated even more,

864
00:48:38,000 --> 00:48:41,680
you know, it was this national virus that we can all help each other.

865
00:48:41,680 --> 00:48:44,440
But now we probably separated even more.

866
00:48:44,440 --> 00:48:48,200
That's one thing that like, it's just crazy about is the news.

867
00:48:48,200 --> 00:48:52,640
I think the news is probably the one, the worst thing is too, just making it more dramatic,

868
00:48:52,640 --> 00:48:53,640
making it more political.

869
00:48:53,640 --> 00:48:58,240
Cause that was also when the new election was, was 2020, I think.

870
00:48:58,240 --> 00:49:00,440
So that was making it worth too.

871
00:49:00,440 --> 00:49:03,280
But I think it just came to crap, I guess.

872
00:49:03,280 --> 00:49:05,720
But yeah.

873
00:49:05,720 --> 00:49:11,080
And but I think that was when I was very tired and very depressed, of course.

874
00:49:11,080 --> 00:49:12,680
But I think homeschool was good for me.

875
00:49:12,680 --> 00:49:16,720
I think that's one thing that actually did really well was there was right timing and

876
00:49:16,720 --> 00:49:17,960
I wasn't lonely at all.

877
00:49:17,960 --> 00:49:23,200
Cause I think I just needed my own space for how many months it was.

878
00:49:23,200 --> 00:49:27,360
Cause it was spring break when it happened.

879
00:49:27,360 --> 00:49:28,800
But yeah.

880
00:49:28,800 --> 00:49:30,920
What about some of the weirdness?

881
00:49:30,920 --> 00:49:35,360
I think God didn't have to experience this, but I know a lot of the fire stations, like

882
00:49:35,360 --> 00:49:39,520
they had to wear masks, they're not allowed to sit down and eat together.

883
00:49:39,520 --> 00:49:41,120
They have to be in separate rooms.

884
00:49:41,120 --> 00:49:43,920
It got a little crazy for quite a while.

885
00:49:43,920 --> 00:49:49,680
And obviously we're in Florida, so it was crazy for a lot less time than the Northwest

886
00:49:49,680 --> 00:49:52,160
and New York and some of these other places.

887
00:49:52,160 --> 00:49:59,360
So what do you remember as far as just being different than simply normal school before

888
00:49:59,360 --> 00:50:00,360
the pandemic?

889
00:50:00,360 --> 00:50:06,160
I mean, of course the mask, I think that was probably the most, not disrespectful, but

890
00:50:06,160 --> 00:50:11,080
most kind of disrespectful cause they made us wear the mask and I couldn't breathe.

891
00:50:11,080 --> 00:50:13,440
So I'll put the mask just under my nose.

892
00:50:13,440 --> 00:50:17,400
So I would be covering my mouth, but I'll just have my nose open and they would say,

893
00:50:17,400 --> 00:50:18,400
put it over.

894
00:50:18,400 --> 00:50:19,400
I'm like, I can't breathe.

895
00:50:19,400 --> 00:50:22,920
So I think that was probably the most I was ever disrespectful.

896
00:50:22,920 --> 00:50:27,560
I never got in trouble or anything cause teachers loved me, but they knew where I was coming

897
00:50:27,560 --> 00:50:28,560
from.

898
00:50:28,560 --> 00:50:31,600
So it wasn't like I got in trouble or anything, but they just had to know.

899
00:50:31,600 --> 00:50:36,360
So they told me like, Ty, I understand what you're saying, just like have to say it even

900
00:50:36,360 --> 00:50:37,360
though.

901
00:50:37,360 --> 00:50:38,360
Yeah.

902
00:50:38,360 --> 00:50:42,080
You had, it wasn't even classified as asthma, but you had wheezing, didn't you?

903
00:50:42,080 --> 00:50:45,240
And then you've always had a lot of kind of sinus issues too.

904
00:50:45,240 --> 00:50:51,440
So I mean, I know this like previous, but cross country destroyed, I'm not sure, but

905
00:50:51,440 --> 00:50:56,040
got rid of my asthma, strength in my lungs a lot.

906
00:50:56,040 --> 00:50:58,400
That's amazing.

907
00:50:58,400 --> 00:51:01,880
What about the pressure of graduation?

908
00:51:01,880 --> 00:51:06,880
I had a high school girl, Emma Benoit, super pretty cheerleader.

909
00:51:06,880 --> 00:51:09,680
You think she would be, don't pull that face.

910
00:51:09,680 --> 00:51:10,680
She's older than you.

911
00:51:10,680 --> 00:51:15,200
You know, but if you're on the outside looking in, you'd be like, okay, this girl, she's

912
00:51:15,200 --> 00:51:16,560
going to be happy in high school.

913
00:51:16,560 --> 00:51:18,200
She's probably got it all, but she wasn't.

914
00:51:18,200 --> 00:51:22,200
And one of the biggest things I remember her telling me, and she'd gone through with a

915
00:51:22,200 --> 00:51:24,080
suicide attempt, but she survived.

916
00:51:24,080 --> 00:51:28,400
So she's in a wheelchair now and she's an amazing voice, especially for younger people

917
00:51:28,400 --> 00:51:30,520
when it comes to mental health.

918
00:51:30,520 --> 00:51:33,980
But one of the biggest things for her is she just didn't know what she wanted to do when

919
00:51:33,980 --> 00:51:34,980
she graduated.

920
00:51:34,980 --> 00:51:40,400
And it was such a stress of like, yeah, come May, you're out of here, go get a job.

921
00:51:40,400 --> 00:51:44,320
And I see that there's people that, you know, like you, that have kind of already figured

922
00:51:44,320 --> 00:51:47,600
out what they want to do, at least at this point.

923
00:51:47,600 --> 00:51:51,080
But I told you, I wanted to be a firefighter and they told me I was colorblind.

924
00:51:51,080 --> 00:51:53,260
I wanted to be a doctor and I wasn't smart enough.

925
00:51:53,260 --> 00:51:57,360
So I had, I was coming out of school going, I don't know what I'm going to do.

926
00:51:57,360 --> 00:52:03,360
So I remember that feeling, whether it's you or whether it's what you hear from your friends,

927
00:52:03,360 --> 00:52:06,440
what are the stresses for, you know, a high school senior?

928
00:52:06,440 --> 00:52:13,280
I mean, I'm feeling like now because I already got accepted to college, but college applications

929
00:52:13,280 --> 00:52:18,000
and common app is like a thing for a college board that like sends all these applications

930
00:52:18,000 --> 00:52:19,000
and essays.

931
00:52:19,000 --> 00:52:25,920
I think that's honestly the main stress because SAT and everything, that's stress and grades

932
00:52:25,920 --> 00:52:30,640
of course, but I feel like after a college application is done and you get accepted,

933
00:52:30,640 --> 00:52:32,280
that doesn't really matter as much.

934
00:52:32,280 --> 00:52:36,800
So I think college applications and getting accepted is like the main stress because grades,

935
00:52:36,800 --> 00:52:41,960
because that's all part of grades too, is grades, SAT scores is with application and

936
00:52:41,960 --> 00:52:42,960
getting accepted.

937
00:52:42,960 --> 00:52:47,740
Are you hearing from any of your friends that they're worried about graduating or have they

938
00:52:47,740 --> 00:52:51,080
all kind of got a plan of what they want to do?

939
00:52:51,080 --> 00:52:56,240
I don't know about the plan, but I mean, I'm around all the smart kids.

940
00:52:56,240 --> 00:52:59,480
So they all know we all have good GPAs.

941
00:52:59,480 --> 00:53:02,160
So college is pretty much where most of your friends go to?

942
00:53:02,160 --> 00:53:03,160
Yeah, or military college.

943
00:53:03,160 --> 00:53:04,160
But yeah.

944
00:53:04,160 --> 00:53:06,960
Well talk to me about that too.

945
00:53:06,960 --> 00:53:11,280
Obviously RAAF is one of them, your friends that have already graduated and gone to military,

946
00:53:11,280 --> 00:53:17,960
like how well did JROTC prepare some of those kids for going to the military?

947
00:53:17,960 --> 00:53:23,080
I know JCLC wasn't like, it's like 2% of boot camp.

948
00:53:23,080 --> 00:53:24,080
It seems like a great thing.

949
00:53:24,080 --> 00:53:26,920
Well you can't shave children's heads and scream at them for it.

950
00:53:26,920 --> 00:53:27,920
Yeah.

951
00:53:27,920 --> 00:53:30,520
It's got to be a little bit different.

952
00:53:30,520 --> 00:53:37,040
But I have friends in the Marines, Army, Air Force, actually everywhere.

953
00:53:37,040 --> 00:53:41,840
And it's kind of fascinating, but I think you know this, that the bigger people at the

954
00:53:41,840 --> 00:53:46,720
like, if you look at statistics, football players and that kind of American style, go

955
00:53:46,720 --> 00:53:50,560
to Army, track, cross country, go to Air Force.

956
00:53:50,560 --> 00:53:54,360
It's kind of funny like how the sports go to different branches.

957
00:53:54,360 --> 00:53:56,960
Water polo is the seals a lot of times.

958
00:53:56,960 --> 00:53:57,960
Yeah.

959
00:53:57,960 --> 00:53:58,960
A lot of those guys.

960
00:53:58,960 --> 00:53:59,960
Swimming, snails.

961
00:53:59,960 --> 00:54:04,160
Because especially like Air Force, I know this for sure is that they do a lot of core

962
00:54:04,160 --> 00:54:08,080
exercises for the pilots because in cross country track, you have to be very mentally

963
00:54:08,080 --> 00:54:12,880
strong and just not giving up and just pushing and keeping strong.

964
00:54:12,880 --> 00:54:14,880
So I think that's one thing.

965
00:54:14,880 --> 00:54:19,160
But I mean that's one thing that like JCLC shows is like, I don't think I can do boot

966
00:54:19,160 --> 00:54:20,160
camps.

967
00:54:20,160 --> 00:54:21,160
I was very strong about the military.

968
00:54:21,160 --> 00:54:22,160
I wanted to go to Air Force.

969
00:54:22,160 --> 00:54:27,680
I wanted to be a pilot because they are very smart, very college proven, but also military

970
00:54:27,680 --> 00:54:28,680
course.

971
00:54:28,680 --> 00:54:29,680
That's one reason why.

972
00:54:29,680 --> 00:54:30,680
But just boot camp.

973
00:54:30,680 --> 00:54:31,680
Like I was scared.

974
00:54:31,680 --> 00:54:36,720
I don't think I could have done it without the lack of sleep because physically, not

975
00:54:36,720 --> 00:54:37,720
hard.

976
00:54:37,720 --> 00:54:39,280
Like you had to run, pull ups.

977
00:54:39,280 --> 00:54:41,400
I can do that old stuff.

978
00:54:41,400 --> 00:54:42,400
But just sleep.

979
00:54:42,400 --> 00:54:43,400
Yeah.

980
00:54:43,400 --> 00:54:47,760
You'd be surprised that when you have to, and especially if you want to, this is the

981
00:54:47,760 --> 00:54:48,760
big thing.

982
00:54:48,760 --> 00:54:49,760
You know, it's the why.

983
00:54:49,760 --> 00:54:55,440
Like for example, when your why started to diminish in track, which kind of went along

984
00:54:55,440 --> 00:54:57,080
the same time as the knees.

985
00:54:57,080 --> 00:55:00,440
Like I wonder if your knees were still fine, if you'd still be running.

986
00:55:00,440 --> 00:55:03,760
Because that why was starting to dwindle a bit, wasn't it?

987
00:55:03,760 --> 00:55:07,400
Like you've got to, in a fire academy, you've got to really want to be there because it

988
00:55:07,400 --> 00:55:08,400
sucks sometimes.

989
00:55:08,400 --> 00:55:09,400
You're hot.

990
00:55:09,400 --> 00:55:13,480
You know, you're scared if you're in some, you know, tight maze that you've got to go

991
00:55:13,480 --> 00:55:17,000
through and you're all tangled up in ropes and you've got to take a breath.

992
00:55:17,000 --> 00:55:21,520
Like if you haven't figured out why you want to be there, you know, I've seen people quit

993
00:55:21,520 --> 00:55:24,520
the fire academies before because their why wasn't, they told me that it was, you know,

994
00:55:24,520 --> 00:55:28,440
for their kids, for their family, but obviously it wasn't, you know, not, it wasn't deep enough.

995
00:55:28,440 --> 00:55:30,720
They hadn't believed that enough.

996
00:55:30,720 --> 00:55:31,800
So yeah.

997
00:55:31,800 --> 00:55:35,520
So I think if you, you know, say you circle around and you decide, yeah, well, I do want

998
00:55:35,520 --> 00:55:38,720
to be, you know, a pilot or whatever the thing would be.

999
00:55:38,720 --> 00:55:42,480
Once that's set in your mind, because I've heard a lot of people say bootcamp wasn't

1000
00:55:42,480 --> 00:55:46,480
that bad, you know, but a lot of these people went to special forces selection.

1001
00:55:46,480 --> 00:55:51,000
So I'm sure compared to that, it wasn't that bad, but you know, it's a game.

1002
00:55:51,000 --> 00:55:52,000
You just got to play the game.

1003
00:55:52,000 --> 00:55:53,280
Same with fire academies.

1004
00:55:53,280 --> 00:55:55,720
I've done all probations and orientations.

1005
00:55:55,720 --> 00:56:00,120
I've done enough of them where you see it's, it's, you know, just yes, sir, no, sir.

1006
00:56:00,120 --> 00:56:02,360
You know, do what they tell you.

1007
00:56:02,360 --> 00:56:04,800
Understand that no matter how well you do it, you're still going to get punished, you

1008
00:56:04,800 --> 00:56:07,160
know, take your licks and keep moving on.

1009
00:56:07,160 --> 00:56:08,160
Yeah.

1010
00:56:08,160 --> 00:56:14,240
I mean like getting screamed at, I'm not like scared of cause, oh, female drill sergeants

1011
00:56:14,240 --> 00:56:19,280
are very more scary than males because they have to be cause they, cause there's guys

1012
00:56:19,280 --> 00:56:24,360
are ego driven and they have to show them that they are in control.

1013
00:56:24,360 --> 00:56:28,120
Or your mom and your stepmom scare the hell out of me.

1014
00:56:28,120 --> 00:56:29,120
But yeah.

1015
00:56:29,120 --> 00:56:35,080
And I remember like another thing is that like most of my friends that were in the military

1016
00:56:35,080 --> 00:56:38,440
were leadership roles or just like try to help it.

1017
00:56:38,440 --> 00:56:39,760
Cause I mean, I was in the leadership role.

1018
00:56:39,760 --> 00:56:44,400
I was exact executive, XO.

1019
00:56:44,400 --> 00:56:45,400
I can't say for some reason.

1020
00:56:45,400 --> 00:56:46,400
Executive officer.

1021
00:56:46,400 --> 00:56:47,440
Yeah, that's it.

1022
00:56:47,440 --> 00:56:48,440
So I deal with leadership.

1023
00:56:48,440 --> 00:56:52,360
I dealt with paperwork, stuff like that.

1024
00:56:52,360 --> 00:56:54,560
So I was first sergeant and there was a company commander.

1025
00:56:54,560 --> 00:57:00,560
So I was like the middleman and, but some of them first sergeant, some of them was this,

1026
00:57:00,560 --> 00:57:05,720
but we all, it's like a family, but they all showed passion.

1027
00:57:05,720 --> 00:57:13,080
But one thing about Jersey is the most of them weren't, I don't know how to, I'm not

1028
00:57:13,080 --> 00:57:18,080
in the nicest way, but like they weren't fit.

1029
00:57:18,080 --> 00:57:23,720
Like they might've like lift weights, but they can't run, they can't do sports.

1030
00:57:23,720 --> 00:57:25,920
They can't do like the simple things.

1031
00:57:25,920 --> 00:57:28,120
They can just carry stuff.

1032
00:57:28,120 --> 00:57:30,200
I'm like, oh, that's interesting.

1033
00:57:30,200 --> 00:57:33,400
Well, let's talk about that for a second.

1034
00:57:33,400 --> 00:57:39,360
Cause if you look back at the environment that you have been raised in, you know, like

1035
00:57:39,360 --> 00:57:43,800
your mom, you know, I mean, I know it's, it's on and off, but she's gone to the gym on

1036
00:57:43,800 --> 00:57:47,200
and off the whole time that you know, since you were little.

1037
00:57:47,200 --> 00:57:49,640
Becky was in CrossFit for a while.

1038
00:57:49,640 --> 00:57:54,640
Obviously, you know, we've done all kinds of stuff together, jujitsu and mud runs and

1039
00:57:54,640 --> 00:57:56,000
you know, all the stuff.

1040
00:57:56,000 --> 00:58:01,640
So you've been surrounded by a culture of movement, of sports, of playing.

1041
00:58:01,640 --> 00:58:06,720
And then, you know, I would like to think that the food that you have at home is not,

1042
00:58:06,720 --> 00:58:07,760
you know, very junky.

1043
00:58:07,760 --> 00:58:14,160
So with that, what do you see as far as the environment and some of your friends are in?

1044
00:58:14,160 --> 00:58:18,240
And let's talk about the food too, like what, if you didn't have a lunch pack for you or

1045
00:58:18,240 --> 00:58:21,200
you pack your own now, but you know, we used to pack it all the time.

1046
00:58:21,200 --> 00:58:25,840
You know, what would be your choices in school as far as food?

1047
00:58:25,840 --> 00:58:33,040
So I know there's like, there's a chips, there's like salsa area, there's pizza, there's like

1048
00:58:33,040 --> 00:58:36,400
salad area for vegetarians and stuff.

1049
00:58:36,400 --> 00:58:44,440
But it's very bad because it just looks like trash, looks like mushed up.

1050
00:58:44,440 --> 00:58:47,520
It's disgusting to be honest, to look at, to smell at.

1051
00:58:47,520 --> 00:58:52,840
You know, like even like the food that sometimes I eat, like I'll be like, okay, I didn't pack

1052
00:58:52,840 --> 00:58:55,440
as much, I'm just going to eat fries or something.

1053
00:58:55,440 --> 00:58:57,680
So I have it, it just tastes like plastic.

1054
00:58:57,680 --> 00:58:59,480
It doesn't taste like real food.

1055
00:58:59,480 --> 00:59:03,880
Well, just to be very clear, obviously, you know, we eat fries and burgers and chicken

1056
00:59:03,880 --> 00:59:08,600
nuggets and you know, things sometimes not very often, but I don't eat burgers.

1057
00:59:08,600 --> 00:59:09,800
No, not burgers.

1058
00:59:09,800 --> 00:59:10,800
I do.

1059
00:59:10,800 --> 00:59:14,800
You know, so again, it's not masquerading that we have some perfectly clean lifestyle,

1060
00:59:14,800 --> 00:59:15,800
but we don't.

1061
00:59:15,800 --> 00:59:18,240
But it's, I talk about this on the show.

1062
00:59:18,240 --> 00:59:22,080
If you build an environment that, you know, the only options are for kids to eat healthy,

1063
00:59:22,080 --> 00:59:23,080
they're going to eat healthy.

1064
00:59:23,080 --> 00:59:27,720
If you build an environment where PE is part of every day, then those kids that you're

1065
00:59:27,720 --> 00:59:31,560
talking about are going to be in better shape and they're going to be fitter.

1066
00:59:31,560 --> 00:59:34,920
But you know, we've got a culture now where PE is like optional.

1067
00:59:34,920 --> 00:59:38,080
You can give a note and say, yeah, little Johnny doesn't want to do PE.

1068
00:59:38,080 --> 00:59:40,120
Well, little Johnny needs to do PE.

1069
00:59:40,120 --> 00:59:42,240
He's probably the one that needs to do it more than anyone else.

1070
00:59:42,240 --> 00:59:46,760
So this is why I'm not, you know, I try not to sound judgy or anything about it.

1071
00:59:46,760 --> 00:59:52,760
It's just like, what are we doing wrong as a country that we have so many kids now that

1072
00:59:52,760 --> 00:59:55,440
aren't fit, that are fat, you know, because it's dangerous.

1073
00:59:55,440 --> 01:00:00,520
It's going to, it's going to, you know, affect their health and not when they're 70 is going

1074
01:00:00,520 --> 01:00:03,040
to help affect their health when they're 20 or 30.

1075
01:00:03,040 --> 01:00:05,720
So it's an important conversation.

1076
01:00:05,720 --> 01:00:09,720
Because one thing that I hated, like actually one reason why my knee was so bad, we did

1077
01:00:09,720 --> 01:00:15,600
company runs and we ran so slow and it's basically like doing high knees and that has always

1078
01:00:15,600 --> 01:00:20,240
hurt my knee because the track was very, very destroyed because it used to be in middle

1079
01:00:20,240 --> 01:00:23,320
school Westport was high school in Westport.

1080
01:00:23,320 --> 01:00:30,320
But one thing that I loved, I did a lot when I was leadership was any runs like the back

1081
01:00:30,320 --> 01:00:32,080
person has to catch up to the front.

1082
01:00:32,080 --> 01:00:33,080
Yeah.

1083
01:00:33,080 --> 01:00:34,080
And that's individual.

1084
01:00:34,080 --> 01:00:35,640
Like they say, Oh, that's very meantime.

1085
01:00:35,640 --> 01:00:38,320
Like, no, you gain your own group.

1086
01:00:38,320 --> 01:00:39,360
You go in your own groove.

1087
01:00:39,360 --> 01:00:43,880
You like, there's no pressure and just keep it on pace because I'm the person that knows

1088
01:00:43,880 --> 01:00:44,880
pacing.

1089
01:00:44,880 --> 01:00:46,260
I run of course.

1090
01:00:46,260 --> 01:00:51,000
So if you are in your same group, maybe have one person stick a little bit faster, but

1091
01:00:51,000 --> 01:00:52,400
have the same pace.

1092
01:00:52,400 --> 01:00:54,520
You can push yourselves.

1093
01:00:54,520 --> 01:00:57,520
But if you guys have fast people, everybody's going to complain.

1094
01:00:57,520 --> 01:01:00,520
The slow people are going to complain, the fast people are going to complain, everybody's

1095
01:01:00,520 --> 01:01:01,520
going to complain.

1096
01:01:01,520 --> 01:01:02,520
Absolutely.

1097
01:01:02,520 --> 01:01:04,640
But at the end of the day it is military style.

1098
01:01:04,640 --> 01:01:11,280
So I get why they have that kind of run, but I don't like it to be honest.

1099
01:01:11,280 --> 01:01:12,280
Yeah.

1100
01:01:12,280 --> 01:01:13,280
But I mean, it's the thing you did it for three years, didn't you?

1101
01:01:13,280 --> 01:01:17,880
You know, you did the XO position, you know, you, you mentored some people and you know,

1102
01:01:17,880 --> 01:01:18,880
it definitely helped.

1103
01:01:18,880 --> 01:01:22,560
I mean, I, you know, there was some leaders in, in those organizations, some of the students,

1104
01:01:22,560 --> 01:01:29,400
some of the officers, you know, that definitely had a positive impact in your life.

1105
01:01:29,400 --> 01:01:33,600
Let's talk about one more thing and then we'll go to, you know, where next for you when you

1106
01:01:33,600 --> 01:01:36,200
graduate.

1107
01:01:36,200 --> 01:01:38,620
Social media.

1108
01:01:38,620 --> 01:01:42,680
When you were very young, obviously we held off on getting your device.

1109
01:01:42,680 --> 01:01:46,560
I think it was when you started riding the school bus that I got you a phone, but it

1110
01:01:46,560 --> 01:01:47,560
was, I bought my own phone.

1111
01:01:47,560 --> 01:01:48,560
Oh, you did buy your own phone.

1112
01:01:48,560 --> 01:01:49,560
Yeah.

1113
01:01:49,560 --> 01:01:52,760
And you could only, I think you could use it on wifi, but there was no data.

1114
01:01:52,760 --> 01:01:55,960
So you could only call and text so that we knew that, you know, you got home safely and

1115
01:01:55,960 --> 01:01:56,960
everything.

1116
01:01:56,960 --> 01:02:01,720
Um, and, uh, but your mom, and this is not to talk crap about your mom, this is just,

1117
01:02:01,720 --> 01:02:03,920
you know, a timeline.

1118
01:02:03,920 --> 01:02:09,560
She let you put Instagram on for a bit when you were, you know, arguably too young in

1119
01:02:09,560 --> 01:02:10,560
my opinion.

1120
01:02:10,560 --> 01:02:16,800
So do you remember that, you know, what that kind of, how that impacted you that first

1121
01:02:16,800 --> 01:02:17,800
time?

1122
01:02:17,800 --> 01:02:23,640
I honestly don't remember like what I looked at, probably Lego, stuff like that.

1123
01:02:23,640 --> 01:02:29,120
But I just remember how like I try to talk to people and I was like very lonely and like,

1124
01:02:29,120 --> 01:02:34,160
I just realized like, Oh, I just saw how people's lives were in this compared to mine.

1125
01:02:34,160 --> 01:02:36,360
So just that kind of thing.

1126
01:02:36,360 --> 01:02:38,240
And that was very unhealthy.

1127
01:02:38,240 --> 01:02:39,920
And that's what you, that's what you said.

1128
01:02:39,920 --> 01:02:41,800
Like you saw that coming too.

1129
01:02:41,800 --> 01:02:42,800
Yeah.

1130
01:02:42,800 --> 01:02:47,280
So I took it away, you know, she said that she'd done it and then I saw your behavior

1131
01:02:47,280 --> 01:02:53,000
change and you were just posting pictures of yourself, you know, at that time.

1132
01:02:53,000 --> 01:02:54,200
Um, yeah.

1133
01:02:54,200 --> 01:02:57,400
And I could just see like you were getting depressed again.

1134
01:02:57,400 --> 01:03:02,080
So you know, we stopped it now, but let's talk about the positive thing because, you

1135
01:03:02,080 --> 01:03:07,200
know, as you know, I'm on social media, even though, you know, Facebook is awful and doesn't

1136
01:03:07,200 --> 01:03:13,960
seem to share anything I do, but Instagram, um, talk to me about how you use social media

1137
01:03:13,960 --> 01:03:15,640
positively now because you have it.

1138
01:03:15,640 --> 01:03:20,880
You've had it for a while, so when you're able to actually make it work for you rather

1139
01:03:20,880 --> 01:03:24,680
than be a slave to it, what do you get on your feeds now?

1140
01:03:24,680 --> 01:03:30,320
I mean, like I know I heard a joke saying a man's best friend's YouTube.

1141
01:03:30,320 --> 01:03:31,680
It's kind of like me of TikTok.

1142
01:03:31,680 --> 01:03:36,800
It helped me studying tips, Lego tips, just stuff like that.

1143
01:03:36,800 --> 01:03:39,960
It would just help me or how style and everything.

1144
01:03:39,960 --> 01:03:46,520
It's very like kind of Google, but in video format and early for TikTok and Instagram,

1145
01:03:46,520 --> 01:03:47,520
it's cool.

1146
01:03:47,520 --> 01:03:49,320
Like I followed a lot of colleges.

1147
01:03:49,320 --> 01:03:54,560
I follow athletes and just like see like what they drink sometimes because that's what they

1148
01:03:54,560 --> 01:03:55,560
post.

1149
01:03:55,560 --> 01:04:00,320
Usually like Jacob don't know his last name or hike up because he's a Norwegian runner

1150
01:04:00,320 --> 01:04:01,560
and best actually.

1151
01:04:01,560 --> 01:04:05,800
Um, he posted just what he does or sometimes on sponsorship.

1152
01:04:05,800 --> 01:04:10,120
So I've seen like new running shoes or I'll follow Lego.

1153
01:04:10,120 --> 01:04:11,120
Love.

1154
01:04:11,120 --> 01:04:12,120
Absolutely.

1155
01:04:12,120 --> 01:04:13,120
So just see that.

1156
01:04:13,120 --> 01:04:17,960
Um, or cars because I love, um, what's my tree?

1157
01:04:17,960 --> 01:04:18,960
Volkswagen Camper.

1158
01:04:18,960 --> 01:04:19,960
Volkswagen.

1159
01:04:19,960 --> 01:04:20,960
Yeah, I love that.

1160
01:04:20,960 --> 01:04:25,760
Um, then like just countries like I follow Iceland, stuff like that, or people that hike.

1161
01:04:25,760 --> 01:04:31,760
I follow one person that has cancer in his leg, but he's like a fitness person.

1162
01:04:31,760 --> 01:04:33,360
So I'll follow actually a lot of fitness people.

1163
01:04:33,360 --> 01:04:35,800
They're not like by boaters, they're not like Jackson.

1164
01:04:35,800 --> 01:04:39,720
Have the same body, uh, lean muscles.

1165
01:04:39,720 --> 01:04:41,080
They're not taking a stairway.

1166
01:04:41,080 --> 01:04:42,080
It's not taking that.

1167
01:04:42,080 --> 01:04:44,000
There's some of them are kind of surfers.

1168
01:04:44,000 --> 01:04:45,100
Some of them are skateboarders.

1169
01:04:45,100 --> 01:04:48,440
So they have that same body type or some reliable too.

1170
01:04:48,440 --> 01:04:51,560
And I follow like a lot of like national teams, see how they play.

1171
01:04:51,560 --> 01:04:59,920
And I think it's very, if it's in three categories, it'd be informal for informal information,

1172
01:04:59,920 --> 01:05:05,480
athletics and my hobbies like piano, sport, Lego, stuff like that.

1173
01:05:05,480 --> 01:05:06,480
Yeah.

1174
01:05:06,480 --> 01:05:08,680
It's, it's so good to see cause I mean, that's exactly it now.

1175
01:05:08,680 --> 01:05:10,120
And you have a time you show me your phone.

1176
01:05:10,120 --> 01:05:14,000
It's always something full cool or you'll just send some inappropriate meme to me.

1177
01:05:14,000 --> 01:05:15,000
Yes.

1178
01:05:15,000 --> 01:05:21,080
And of course social media is to send reels to my dad and other friends, either golden

1179
01:05:21,080 --> 01:05:24,120
retrievers or like Dong and poop jokes.

1180
01:05:24,120 --> 01:05:26,360
Pretty much family guys.

1181
01:05:26,360 --> 01:05:32,520
Um, when you talked about Lego expand on that, you know, this, this is truly one of your

1182
01:05:32,520 --> 01:05:36,080
loves, you know, and ever since you were tiny, you've always loved Lego.

1183
01:05:36,080 --> 01:05:40,840
And as we sit here now, you're going to be grieving because Becky's coming home or her

1184
01:05:40,840 --> 01:05:42,200
furniture was coming home.

1185
01:05:42,200 --> 01:05:43,400
So it's got to go in that room.

1186
01:05:43,400 --> 01:05:46,840
And you had an entire room dedicated to Lego after your brother left.

1187
01:05:46,840 --> 01:05:48,280
He's that brother.

1188
01:05:48,280 --> 01:05:52,940
So talk to me about what that's done for you because you said about being an only child,

1189
01:05:52,940 --> 01:05:56,680
you know, what kind of therapeutic side is there for your Lego building?

1190
01:05:56,680 --> 01:06:01,640
I don't know if you would've said, and I think it's probably right that I didn't actually

1191
01:06:01,640 --> 01:06:05,560
know subconsciously is that it's the only thing to have control.

1192
01:06:05,560 --> 01:06:09,360
Cause as a result of the first parents, how they argue, it was the only thing that I had

1193
01:06:09,360 --> 01:06:12,800
control that I feels like my own little world.

1194
01:06:12,800 --> 01:06:16,380
And I think I wanted it to be how it wanted to be.

1195
01:06:16,380 --> 01:06:21,200
So I think that's one reason why I love Lego, but also it's just like, I'm a kind of person

1196
01:06:21,200 --> 01:06:23,800
like I don't bend rules, but I like it.

1197
01:06:23,800 --> 01:06:24,800
So I'm really good.

1198
01:06:24,800 --> 01:06:27,160
I just follow the rules, following the instructions, easy peasy.

1199
01:06:27,160 --> 01:06:29,920
Cause some people struggle with it, but I'm like, how?

1200
01:06:29,920 --> 01:06:30,920
It's so easy.

1201
01:06:30,920 --> 01:06:34,000
Well, you used to when you were young, you know, you probably don't remember that now,

1202
01:06:34,000 --> 01:06:35,880
but yeah, yeah, yeah.

1203
01:06:35,880 --> 01:06:40,080
So no, and then you'd ask me with my sausage fingers to help and then I'd get all wound

1204
01:06:40,080 --> 01:06:41,080
up.

1205
01:06:41,080 --> 01:06:42,080
Yeah.

1206
01:06:42,080 --> 01:06:47,640
I know some pieces like some like the tying size tying a knot that little string so frustrating.

1207
01:06:47,640 --> 01:06:52,440
But yeah, and it just, it's my own world and it's my kind of art.

1208
01:06:52,440 --> 01:06:56,200
Cause I can make realistic things with Lego.

1209
01:06:56,200 --> 01:07:00,400
I can make, I mean, of course Lego has involved with their sets and everything to make it

1210
01:07:00,400 --> 01:07:05,080
realistic as possible, but it's also just how I think.

1211
01:07:05,080 --> 01:07:09,920
And like, I know like you'll see like in movies, like kids have played Lego, but I always played

1212
01:07:09,920 --> 01:07:11,920
by myself and I liked it like that.

1213
01:07:11,920 --> 01:07:14,240
Like even when you touch it, like I hate it.

1214
01:07:14,240 --> 01:07:17,800
Like I'll have attitude when you break it or something.

1215
01:07:17,800 --> 01:07:19,640
God forbid I not went over or something.

1216
01:07:19,640 --> 01:07:20,640
Yeah.

1217
01:07:20,640 --> 01:07:21,920
Because like, I mean, cause you don't know how it is.

1218
01:07:21,920 --> 01:07:24,800
I have a photo photographic memory.

1219
01:07:24,800 --> 01:07:28,200
So if you swap something, I, it gets messed up.

1220
01:07:28,200 --> 01:07:29,800
So it just destroys it.

1221
01:07:29,800 --> 01:07:32,800
And of course I hate that because it's my Lego.

1222
01:07:32,800 --> 01:07:37,480
You do have a photographic memory because you haven't done it as much recently, but

1223
01:07:37,480 --> 01:07:41,560
certainly, you know, not too long ago you'd be like, dad, do you remember when we went

1224
01:07:41,560 --> 01:07:45,240
to that restaurant and then you ordered this and you were wearing this t-shirt and I had

1225
01:07:45,240 --> 01:07:49,360
this Lego and yeah, your memory is like, it couldn't be further from mine.

1226
01:07:49,360 --> 01:07:53,360
Mine is like a colander, you know, you strain spaghetti with like something might stay in

1227
01:07:53,360 --> 01:07:56,280
there, but most of it just comes out, you know, wherever.

1228
01:07:56,280 --> 01:07:58,280
So it does.

1229
01:07:58,280 --> 01:07:59,280
It does.

1230
01:07:59,280 --> 01:08:05,520
So while I remember we're obviously recording the podcast episode a thousand, um, you have

1231
01:08:05,520 --> 01:08:09,640
helped me or inspired me to get a handful of guests.

1232
01:08:09,640 --> 01:08:13,320
So I know one, you ended up meeting one of your heroes.

1233
01:08:13,320 --> 01:08:14,920
So let's talk about that.

1234
01:08:14,920 --> 01:08:17,560
Um, yeah, Bethany Hamilton.

1235
01:08:17,560 --> 01:08:20,200
Um, yeah, she's amazing.

1236
01:08:20,200 --> 01:08:24,560
One thing that I realized like, cause I'm the kind of person about perspective and I'm

1237
01:08:24,560 --> 01:08:30,680
not religious at all, but I want to get more knowledge on religion, just how they perspective

1238
01:08:30,680 --> 01:08:31,680
things.

1239
01:08:31,680 --> 01:08:37,760
And I was thinking like how maybe if there's a God, maybe he put Bethany Hamilton as a

1240
01:08:37,760 --> 01:08:44,560
situation to help inspire people to, if they have no limb or just that they can thrive

1241
01:08:44,560 --> 01:08:47,760
because she is a professional surfer with one arm.

1242
01:08:47,760 --> 01:08:51,840
And like just now I was thinking like, well, if God may go in the centers to help those

1243
01:08:51,840 --> 01:08:57,340
kids not get wrong with the hospitalize, but she is inspiration.

1244
01:08:57,340 --> 01:09:01,520
She showed that never gave it up is a way of living.

1245
01:09:01,520 --> 01:09:07,320
And she, I mean, Hawaii is one of my dream places to always go to and that culture of

1246
01:09:07,320 --> 01:09:13,320
surfing even though I love skiing too, but, um, being California kid, I guess it's my

1247
01:09:13,320 --> 01:09:17,800
kind of side of things, but she's just so amazing.

1248
01:09:17,800 --> 01:09:23,680
I remember when I interviewed her and then, you know, I told you to come in cause obviously

1249
01:09:23,680 --> 01:09:26,720
it was a virtual meeting, but then you sat down and talked to her and I got a picture

1250
01:09:26,720 --> 01:09:31,160
and I think I've ever seen you smile so wide as when you were talking to Bethany Hamilton.

1251
01:09:31,160 --> 01:09:35,040
I don't think I stuttered as much either.

1252
01:09:35,040 --> 01:09:36,040
Do you remember as well?

1253
01:09:36,040 --> 01:09:42,000
I forget his name is a captain hook is on Instagram, but he also is an amputee, but

1254
01:09:42,000 --> 01:09:43,800
he was a professional basketball player.

1255
01:09:43,800 --> 01:09:44,800
Yeah.

1256
01:09:44,800 --> 01:09:50,520
I remember cause we like sometimes during like storming days, we watched stuff like

1257
01:09:50,520 --> 01:09:53,080
that during PE and Liberty.

1258
01:09:53,080 --> 01:09:54,160
And that's one thing.

1259
01:09:54,160 --> 01:09:57,800
And I remember like remembering him, his name, like during school and it was hard because

1260
01:09:57,800 --> 01:10:00,360
like, as a doorstep, I'm like, okay, I have to remember this for my dad.

1261
01:10:00,360 --> 01:10:01,560
I have to remember this for my dad.

1262
01:10:01,560 --> 01:10:03,040
And I told you about it.

1263
01:10:03,040 --> 01:10:04,040
Yeah.

1264
01:10:04,040 --> 01:10:06,240
And I remember it was demand after you give me a guest.

1265
01:10:06,240 --> 01:10:07,240
Give me money.

1266
01:10:07,240 --> 01:10:08,240
Yeah.

1267
01:10:08,240 --> 01:10:09,240
All right.

1268
01:10:09,240 --> 01:10:14,800
Well, I got one little area and then we'll go to, you know, where you're going next and

1269
01:10:14,800 --> 01:10:22,160
then closing questions, but you are 17 now, you know, you and, you know, you and I obviously

1270
01:10:22,160 --> 01:10:27,280
have been through when you were tiny with your mom and then long periods of, you know,

1271
01:10:27,280 --> 01:10:28,280
single dad.

1272
01:10:28,280 --> 01:10:31,640
And then obviously, you know, we have Becky and Ethan, you know, so it's been all these

1273
01:10:31,640 --> 01:10:37,960
different chapters, but the whole time until very recently, I was a firefighter.

1274
01:10:37,960 --> 01:10:45,200
So when you look back now through your childhood and having a dad who was, you know, working

1275
01:10:45,200 --> 01:10:48,760
in that profession, again, what were the good things about it?

1276
01:10:48,760 --> 01:10:51,520
And then what were the bad things about it?

1277
01:10:51,520 --> 01:10:55,160
That's funny because I actually been thinking about that is like, I don't like, I don't

1278
01:10:55,160 --> 01:10:57,640
remember that much of you being a firefighter.

1279
01:10:57,640 --> 01:11:01,800
I remember going to all the workout things like doing all the fundraisers with you, but

1280
01:11:01,800 --> 01:11:05,480
I don't actually remember when you're a firefighter for some reason.

1281
01:11:05,480 --> 01:11:07,680
Like I don't remember you coming home or anything.

1282
01:11:07,680 --> 01:11:12,360
I was saying like, I like, I have like fade memories saying like, hi dad, or like running

1283
01:11:12,360 --> 01:11:13,640
up and hugging you.

1284
01:11:13,640 --> 01:11:20,080
I don't remember like you being gone, I guess, but I've been spoiled and you've been retired

1285
01:11:20,080 --> 01:11:21,560
since fifth grade, I think.

1286
01:11:21,560 --> 01:11:22,560
Yeah.

1287
01:11:22,560 --> 01:11:26,040
Because six years ago, yeah, retired's a loose word.

1288
01:11:26,040 --> 01:11:28,440
I haven't been getting a pension for six years.

1289
01:11:28,440 --> 01:11:29,440
Yeah.

1290
01:11:29,440 --> 01:11:34,800
So by the way, I think, I mean, arguably like fifth, you're only a firefighter in my life

1291
01:11:34,800 --> 01:11:38,000
for what, 10 years?

1292
01:11:38,000 --> 01:11:39,000
Yeah, 10, 10.

1293
01:11:39,000 --> 01:11:40,000
Yep.

1294
01:11:40,000 --> 01:11:42,520
Like six, four of that, I didn't remember as much.

1295
01:11:42,520 --> 01:11:47,160
So that's probably one right, but I know that I was always happy to see you.

1296
01:11:47,160 --> 01:11:54,840
And I know that I, if, guessings, like I said, I don't remember, but I was probably very

1297
01:11:54,840 --> 01:11:55,840
lonely without you.

1298
01:11:55,840 --> 01:11:59,880
But also, as you said earlier, I had Nini too.

1299
01:11:59,880 --> 01:12:04,480
Or, I mean, cause I was actually too young, so I didn't stay at home by myself.

1300
01:12:04,480 --> 01:12:09,360
So I was with my mom actually thinking about it, cause I was too young to spend time by

1301
01:12:09,360 --> 01:12:10,360
myself.

1302
01:12:10,360 --> 01:12:11,360
Yeah.

1303
01:12:11,360 --> 01:12:12,360
Yeah.

1304
01:12:12,360 --> 01:12:15,400
The one that I, I've talked about this on here, the one I don't remember how the hell

1305
01:12:15,400 --> 01:12:18,560
even made it work was when I went to paramedic school as well.

1306
01:12:18,560 --> 01:12:25,600
So this would have been, you were only about five then, but I worked at Orange County,

1307
01:12:25,600 --> 01:12:32,400
so 24 hours in a busy, busy rescue, then drove straight to CF to do the medic school classroom

1308
01:12:32,400 --> 01:12:33,400
stuff.

1309
01:12:33,400 --> 01:12:36,000
And then did a 12 hour clinical the next day.

1310
01:12:36,000 --> 01:12:41,720
And I think it was when we did like the extended day at school and, you know, just made it

1311
01:12:41,720 --> 01:12:42,720
work.

1312
01:12:42,720 --> 01:12:46,240
But I mean that, that year, I don't know how that, I honestly, when I think back, I don't

1313
01:12:46,240 --> 01:12:47,240
know how we made it work.

1314
01:12:47,240 --> 01:12:49,640
I don't, but we did.

1315
01:12:49,640 --> 01:12:51,440
Do you remember when I saved the house from a fire?

1316
01:12:51,440 --> 01:12:54,360
I had to put on my firefighter gear and save the house.

1317
01:12:54,360 --> 01:12:55,960
With my forge.

1318
01:12:55,960 --> 01:12:56,960
Yes.

1319
01:12:56,960 --> 01:12:57,960
Yep.

1320
01:12:57,960 --> 01:12:59,560
Got you the hose and set fire to some stuff.

1321
01:12:59,560 --> 01:13:02,880
That's actually probably the strongest memory is just, I always want to be a firefighter.

1322
01:13:02,880 --> 01:13:04,040
Like I always looked up to you.

1323
01:13:04,040 --> 01:13:06,720
I had like all the firefighter stuff with the trucks.

1324
01:13:06,720 --> 01:13:07,720
I had a book.

1325
01:13:07,720 --> 01:13:13,040
I memorized all the fire trucks, the airport trucks to different nations trucks.

1326
01:13:13,040 --> 01:13:18,800
That's actually one thing I do remember a lot though, is I was a nerd with firefighters.

1327
01:13:18,800 --> 01:13:22,800
With the stunt side, do you remember the backyard of the old house and what stunt we used to

1328
01:13:22,800 --> 01:13:23,800
do?

1329
01:13:23,800 --> 01:13:26,200
Warcycle or a dirt bike.

1330
01:13:26,200 --> 01:13:27,200
Dirt bike.

1331
01:13:27,200 --> 01:13:28,200
What did we used to do in Bernard?

1332
01:13:28,200 --> 01:13:30,960
Oh, dress or like do donuts.

1333
01:13:30,960 --> 01:13:34,840
Do you remember one of your friend's parents calling me saying, Hey, there's someone doing

1334
01:13:34,840 --> 01:13:35,840
donuts in the garden.

1335
01:13:35,840 --> 01:13:36,840
Yeah.

1336
01:13:36,840 --> 01:13:40,560
And Becky's first time going out rodeo.

1337
01:13:40,560 --> 01:13:41,560
Oh yeah.

1338
01:13:41,560 --> 01:13:42,560
Screaming.

1339
01:13:42,560 --> 01:13:43,560
Yeah.

1340
01:13:43,560 --> 01:13:44,560
All right.

1341
01:13:44,560 --> 01:13:48,640
Well, let's get, you talked about Nini, obviously when we lost her, you know, we were heartbroken

1342
01:13:48,640 --> 01:13:51,920
and we don't need to go there because get you upset.

1343
01:13:51,920 --> 01:13:56,680
We both know how we felt about that, but you said about being inspired to become a vet.

1344
01:13:56,680 --> 01:14:00,680
Well obviously your grandfather was a vet resurgent.

1345
01:14:00,680 --> 01:14:05,520
So talk to me about what's next, you know, which college you hoping to go to again, if

1346
01:14:05,520 --> 01:14:10,280
we get all these scholarships lined up and then, you know, what profession are you hoping

1347
01:14:10,280 --> 01:14:11,760
to go into?

1348
01:14:11,760 --> 01:14:18,560
So I want to go to Utah State because the lady I met with, they are having a new vet

1349
01:14:18,560 --> 01:14:20,880
program that are building right now.

1350
01:14:20,880 --> 01:14:26,480
So when I graduated the building would be finished and Utah is a very active place.

1351
01:14:26,480 --> 01:14:32,840
So we're going to be at ski slopes and like, I know we haven't said in the same, but fitness

1352
01:14:32,840 --> 01:14:35,400
is all about where you are too.

1353
01:14:35,400 --> 01:14:38,720
So if, if you're in a beach town, a lot of people would be surfing, a lot of people would

1354
01:14:38,720 --> 01:14:41,160
be fit, a lot of people would be tan, stuff like that.

1355
01:14:41,160 --> 01:14:46,440
And ski town is going to be a lot of skiing, a lot of fitness and everything.

1356
01:14:46,440 --> 01:14:52,160
Not as tan, probably as white as you or my real whiteness, I guess.

1357
01:14:52,160 --> 01:14:55,160
Cause I'm, but yeah.

1358
01:14:55,160 --> 01:14:59,400
And I want to be exotic vet because I was thinking of being a regular vet, but I was

1359
01:14:59,400 --> 01:15:03,080
thinking what are people changing?

1360
01:15:03,080 --> 01:15:04,760
What do I need to change?

1361
01:15:04,760 --> 01:15:07,600
And one thing I hear a lot is just extinction.

1362
01:15:07,600 --> 01:15:12,320
And if I need to fix that, I want to, cause I hate when people say something and don't

1363
01:15:12,320 --> 01:15:14,160
do it and I don't want to be that person.

1364
01:15:14,160 --> 01:15:17,480
I want to stick by my word and fix the problem.

1365
01:15:17,480 --> 01:15:18,480
Beautiful.

1366
01:15:18,480 --> 01:15:20,840
I think you're going to be amazing.

1367
01:15:20,840 --> 01:15:22,800
And like I said, this is the thing about having dreams.

1368
01:15:22,800 --> 01:15:26,540
If you, like I had a dream to be a firefighter and a paramedic.

1369
01:15:26,540 --> 01:15:30,760
And then one day I found myself behind a microphone writing books and it didn't know.

1370
01:15:30,760 --> 01:15:32,640
So this is the other thing too, is having a dream.

1371
01:15:32,640 --> 01:15:36,200
And then, you know, if you get a year, two years from now, you're like, Oh, actually,

1372
01:15:36,200 --> 01:15:40,980
I think I want to be a pilot or, you know, I'm going to be a teacher or whatever it is.

1373
01:15:40,980 --> 01:15:46,160
Just having a plan when you leave school and then, but knowing that you're not disappointing

1374
01:15:46,160 --> 01:15:50,120
anyone, you're not failing if you change that course a little bit.

1375
01:15:50,120 --> 01:15:51,120
Yeah.

1376
01:15:51,120 --> 01:15:54,640
And I know one thing is my degree is going to be biology.

1377
01:15:54,640 --> 01:16:01,160
So I think there's like 23 job opportunities with the biology degree.

1378
01:16:01,160 --> 01:16:07,320
So the regret of doing what I'm doing will be a very less because the opportunities with

1379
01:16:07,320 --> 01:16:08,320
the biology degree.

1380
01:16:08,320 --> 01:16:09,640
Cause I want to be in the health profession.

1381
01:16:09,640 --> 01:16:10,640
I know that for sure.

1382
01:16:10,640 --> 01:16:11,640
Yeah.

1383
01:16:11,640 --> 01:16:12,640
Beautiful.

1384
01:16:12,640 --> 01:16:13,640
All right.

1385
01:16:13,640 --> 01:16:17,440
I'm going to throw the same questions that I throw everyone to close out.

1386
01:16:17,440 --> 01:16:22,000
First one, is there a book or are there books that you love to recommend to people or tell

1387
01:16:22,000 --> 01:16:23,000
people about?

1388
01:16:23,000 --> 01:16:27,680
The biography, is that what it's called?

1389
01:16:27,680 --> 01:16:33,320
Of Terry Fox, the Canadian runner that got cancer in his leg that ran across Canada,

1390
01:16:33,320 --> 01:16:36,120
even after his ending with lung cancer.

1391
01:16:36,120 --> 01:16:42,920
I think that's what killed him and Soul Surfer, the book that Bethany Hamilton published and

1392
01:16:42,920 --> 01:16:44,640
movie I think it was as well.

1393
01:16:44,640 --> 01:16:45,640
Yep.

1394
01:16:45,640 --> 01:16:46,640
Absolutely.

1395
01:16:46,640 --> 01:16:47,640
Beautiful.

1396
01:16:47,640 --> 01:16:48,640
What about films and documentaries?

1397
01:16:48,640 --> 01:16:55,640
Well, so the thing about me is that, as you know, nerd vapes, never done anything but

1398
01:16:55,640 --> 01:17:01,320
that, but the characters I like are kind of like high, I guess you could say.

1399
01:17:01,320 --> 01:17:02,320
Stoners.

1400
01:17:02,320 --> 01:17:03,320
Yeah.

1401
01:17:03,320 --> 01:17:06,040
I love surfing, but one movie I really love is Surf's Up.

1402
01:17:06,040 --> 01:17:07,040
It's a surf movie.

1403
01:17:07,040 --> 01:17:12,760
It was animated, but some quotes in it are very heavy, like everything.

1404
01:17:12,760 --> 01:17:18,960
It shows that because basically just saying being a nobody to somebody and known dogs,

1405
01:17:18,960 --> 01:17:19,960
I love.

1406
01:17:19,960 --> 01:17:22,080
The stories, everybody loves the underdog.

1407
01:17:22,080 --> 01:17:27,680
I think that's what I love about it and of course about surfing, but also just shows

1408
01:17:27,680 --> 01:17:30,480
that you can be.

1409
01:17:30,480 --> 01:17:33,680
When Cody says this, Cody says that, Cody's me.

1410
01:17:33,680 --> 01:17:37,080
No one else's opinions matter.

1411
01:17:37,080 --> 01:17:38,360
I'm me.

1412
01:17:38,360 --> 01:17:39,920
Give me some Chicken Joe quotes.

1413
01:17:39,920 --> 01:17:40,920
Oh yeah.

1414
01:17:40,920 --> 01:17:47,000
Chicken Joe is the stoner that I love, but he always feels it in his nuggets, so he always

1415
01:17:47,000 --> 01:17:50,960
has his gut feeling and he's all about perspective.

1416
01:17:50,960 --> 01:17:57,200
The thing about me is I just like to go for flow.

1417
01:17:57,200 --> 01:17:58,640
I plan my future.

1418
01:17:58,640 --> 01:18:00,680
I don't plan day to day.

1419
01:18:00,680 --> 01:18:05,600
If someone hits me up and says, let's go play volleyball, let's go play volleyball, my voice

1420
01:18:05,600 --> 01:18:09,160
cracked, but I like that.

1421
01:18:09,160 --> 01:18:13,800
I think one thing is that they're not chained down to modern society.

1422
01:18:13,800 --> 01:18:18,160
I think that's why people call beach bums beach bums, because they think they're bums

1423
01:18:18,160 --> 01:18:22,760
even though they see such amazing views.

1424
01:18:22,760 --> 01:18:28,080
When I skim board, when I surf, sunsets are amazing at the beach.

1425
01:18:28,080 --> 01:18:32,240
You know, like motorcycles, people call them a gang, but I think it's just a group of people

1426
01:18:32,240 --> 01:18:37,640
that want to see the world in their own way by going on road trips with motorcycles, because

1427
01:18:37,640 --> 01:18:39,920
that's what they usually do.

1428
01:18:39,920 --> 01:18:46,160
But people call them a gang because they see the movies, they see big dudes, because they

1429
01:18:46,160 --> 01:18:50,240
are pretty big or pretty muscular.

1430
01:18:50,240 --> 01:18:52,120
But I don't think they're a gang.

1431
01:18:52,120 --> 01:18:57,880
You don't hear in news that all these motorcycle people are fighting and everything.

1432
01:18:57,880 --> 01:18:58,880
You don't hear that.

1433
01:18:58,880 --> 01:19:01,960
So why should we call them a gang if we don't hear it?

1434
01:19:01,960 --> 01:19:03,160
You know, it's funny you say that.

1435
01:19:03,160 --> 01:19:08,880
When I interviewed Josh Brolin the very first time, he said, you know, I referred to his

1436
01:19:08,880 --> 01:19:13,920
motorcycle, I think they called him crew, but you know, the group that he rides with.

1437
01:19:13,920 --> 01:19:18,440
And he said something like you're the first person who hasn't referred to them as a gang.

1438
01:19:18,440 --> 01:19:20,000
So yeah, because you're right.

1439
01:19:20,000 --> 01:19:26,600
I mean, yeah, there are gangs that are criminals, you know, sections of, you know, the Hells

1440
01:19:26,600 --> 01:19:29,000
Angels and some of the other ones that are more notorious.

1441
01:19:29,000 --> 01:19:32,880
But yeah, most people are out there just writing, you know, I think this is a problem these

1442
01:19:32,880 --> 01:19:37,520
days is you tar everyone with the same brush, you know, just because one person did something

1443
01:19:37,520 --> 01:19:42,040
doesn't mean you got to assume that the whole group of people are going to do the same.

1444
01:19:42,040 --> 01:19:46,600
Yeah, I mean, that's racism with very many things.

1445
01:19:46,600 --> 01:19:53,520
And like, I feel like one thing that I love that I'm taking all these classes is perspective.

1446
01:19:53,520 --> 01:20:00,360
Like, there's so just mainly there's some reason why this is like with modern, I mean,

1447
01:20:00,360 --> 01:20:05,520
modern 1900s, I mean, 20th century is modern kind of right, because that's not that far

1448
01:20:05,520 --> 01:20:06,520
away.

1449
01:20:06,520 --> 01:20:07,520
Right.

1450
01:20:07,520 --> 01:20:13,280
Because World War One, it was the crap, what was it?

1451
01:20:13,280 --> 01:20:14,280
I'm brain farting.

1452
01:20:14,280 --> 01:20:18,680
But of course, World War One, the white people and black people, but it was more segregated

1453
01:20:18,680 --> 01:20:24,080
and more little because it was actually the France or the English actually had the more

1454
01:20:24,080 --> 01:20:26,800
minorities in their own unit.

1455
01:20:26,800 --> 01:20:29,480
But the great migration, that's what it's called.

1456
01:20:29,480 --> 01:20:36,320
But the whites were angry and racism got bigger was because the minorities took their jobs

1457
01:20:36,320 --> 01:20:41,000
and they fought a huge war, PTSD and raising, but it came and took their jobs.

1458
01:20:41,000 --> 01:20:46,040
So now they have a PTSD in the home or a horrible life.

1459
01:20:46,040 --> 01:20:49,520
I think I learned that I'm like, oh my God, that makes sense.

1460
01:20:49,520 --> 01:20:51,200
Like it's horrible.

1461
01:20:51,200 --> 01:20:52,200
Like lynching and everything.

1462
01:20:52,200 --> 01:20:56,960
I'm lynching is like a little bit later, like 1960s and everything.

1463
01:20:56,960 --> 01:21:02,280
That's like when it's really bad and publicized because photographs and news and everything.

1464
01:21:02,280 --> 01:21:05,080
But like people were racist for a reason.

1465
01:21:05,080 --> 01:21:07,600
I mean, of course, like white people think.

1466
01:21:07,600 --> 01:21:11,960
But you're right though, because if you even talk about slavery, it's not, oh, we need

1467
01:21:11,960 --> 01:21:14,640
to get black people to make them slaves.

1468
01:21:14,640 --> 01:21:17,000
They just care, we just need, I don't care what color they are.

1469
01:21:17,000 --> 01:21:20,280
I just want some people to work for me for free so I can make more money.

1470
01:21:20,280 --> 01:21:26,960
And like you said, that war, it could have been Irish people, it could have been English

1471
01:21:26,960 --> 01:21:31,960
people, but someone, a human being was in the job of that person had to leave to go

1472
01:21:31,960 --> 01:21:33,240
fight a war.

1473
01:21:33,240 --> 01:21:35,260
So it's not about ultimately the color.

1474
01:21:35,260 --> 01:21:39,820
It's about the cause of the war in the first place and poor decisions made where you put

1475
01:21:39,820 --> 01:21:43,600
other humans in, that should have been held for that person who came out from war.

1476
01:21:43,600 --> 01:21:47,880
So yeah, when you look at that, it's not like, oh, I don't like the pigmentation.

1477
01:21:47,880 --> 01:21:50,880
Like you said, there's an origin story for that anger.

1478
01:21:50,880 --> 01:21:51,880
That's not racism.

1479
01:21:51,880 --> 01:21:53,760
That's far deeper than that.

1480
01:21:53,760 --> 01:21:54,760
Yeah.

1481
01:21:54,760 --> 01:22:00,800
And like, I mean, danger, not danger, the servants before slavery, like they always

1482
01:22:00,800 --> 01:22:04,120
white people that were slaves before slaves.

1483
01:22:04,120 --> 01:22:08,520
They were promised grants and promised money, but the owners didn't.

1484
01:22:08,520 --> 01:22:10,600
And that's when Shades Rebellion came out.

1485
01:22:10,600 --> 01:22:14,720
And that's when they came out slaves because of Shades Rebellion and of course, Indians,

1486
01:22:14,720 --> 01:22:15,720
right?

1487
01:22:15,720 --> 01:22:20,280
Because I mean, war, they killed them all to be honest, either war, because Shades Rebellion

1488
01:22:20,280 --> 01:22:25,000
and how Indians were trying to give them a rights was for times gone.

1489
01:22:25,000 --> 01:22:32,640
But Indians, even like in across the nation, like gypsums, they enslaved their own kind.

1490
01:22:32,640 --> 01:22:36,880
Like as you see it with the books, how like their history and they made people build the

1491
01:22:36,880 --> 01:22:37,880
pyramids.

1492
01:22:37,880 --> 01:22:38,880
That's enslavement.

1493
01:22:38,880 --> 01:22:41,400
And then they get paid for that.

1494
01:22:41,400 --> 01:22:43,400
It's just, it's crazy.

1495
01:22:43,400 --> 01:22:44,400
Yes.

1496
01:22:44,400 --> 01:22:46,360
I mean, it's been around forever.

1497
01:22:46,360 --> 01:22:49,200
And again, the origin story is not the color.

1498
01:22:49,200 --> 01:22:50,800
It's just, it's greed.

1499
01:22:50,800 --> 01:22:51,800
That's it.

1500
01:22:51,800 --> 01:22:56,840
You know, if I can get all these people to build my whatever for free or, you know, work

1501
01:22:56,840 --> 01:23:01,680
my fields, my plantations, whatever, then I get to be rich and powerful.

1502
01:23:01,680 --> 01:23:03,280
It's not about the color of the person.

1503
01:23:03,280 --> 01:23:04,280
It was free labor.

1504
01:23:04,280 --> 01:23:05,400
And that's what's so disgusting.

1505
01:23:05,400 --> 01:23:09,400
And then you turn around and say, oh, this one race is responsible for slavery.

1506
01:23:09,400 --> 01:23:14,480
It's like, no, there's a small group of complete a holes that happen to be the same color who

1507
01:23:14,480 --> 01:23:16,520
were responsible for slavery.

1508
01:23:16,520 --> 01:23:19,580
And then like you said, you know, if you follow the chain, you've got the Americans and you've

1509
01:23:19,580 --> 01:23:24,080
got the Europeans and you've got the African people that were selling their own people.

1510
01:23:24,080 --> 01:23:26,840
It's greed of all colors and creeds.

1511
01:23:26,840 --> 01:23:29,760
But you know, as you said, then there's lynchings and things.

1512
01:23:29,760 --> 01:23:32,840
Those were absolutely disgusting and there was real racism.

1513
01:23:32,840 --> 01:23:38,040
But if you reverse engineer most of the horrible things that happen in history, it's a few

1514
01:23:38,040 --> 01:23:42,640
greedy, horrible, power hungry people that ruin it for the masses.

1515
01:23:42,640 --> 01:23:43,640
Yeah.

1516
01:23:43,640 --> 01:23:47,560
One thing I like, like I was thinking about, what do you think about human nature?

1517
01:23:47,560 --> 01:23:50,880
Like, what do you think that is?

1518
01:23:50,880 --> 01:23:59,440
So I have said recently that my perception of evolution of man is kindness, because if

1519
01:23:59,440 --> 01:24:05,520
you look at history, all the like horrendous stuff that people did a long, long time ago

1520
01:24:05,520 --> 01:24:12,160
to each other, I think overall, as we've evolved as a species, we've we've developed this sense

1521
01:24:12,160 --> 01:24:17,560
of compassion and empathy and kindness because you know, you don't see it in some members

1522
01:24:17,560 --> 01:24:20,400
of the animal kingdom, for example.

1523
01:24:20,400 --> 01:24:24,520
So I am a incurable optimist that think that most people are good.

1524
01:24:24,520 --> 01:24:25,780
I really do.

1525
01:24:25,780 --> 01:24:28,520
And I think the mean ones are regressing.

1526
01:24:28,520 --> 01:24:32,240
They're they're the ones stuck in time and the ones that are kind and compassionate,

1527
01:24:32,240 --> 01:24:33,800
I think of the next generation.

1528
01:24:33,800 --> 01:24:35,640
Yeah, I like that.

1529
01:24:35,640 --> 01:24:38,120
But people talk about how selfish this and everything.

1530
01:24:38,120 --> 01:24:41,700
But if you look at the animal kingdom, animals are selfish too.

1531
01:24:41,700 --> 01:24:45,760
They will kill their own kind to survive and everything.

1532
01:24:45,760 --> 01:24:47,880
It's just about survival.

1533
01:24:47,880 --> 01:24:52,280
And I think that the thing that makes us different is we can think we can evolve.

1534
01:24:52,280 --> 01:24:58,120
I mean, everyone can evolve like animals and everything evolve, but our minds involve antibodies.

1535
01:24:58,120 --> 01:25:03,720
So I think that's what's the difference is like we are overall involved involvement.

1536
01:25:03,720 --> 01:25:04,720
Sorry.

1537
01:25:04,720 --> 01:25:08,360
But yeah, and I agree like it's corruption.

1538
01:25:08,360 --> 01:25:11,400
It's their home life.

1539
01:25:11,400 --> 01:25:14,160
It's all this stuff that makes them who they are.

1540
01:25:14,160 --> 01:25:15,160
Absolutely.

1541
01:25:15,160 --> 01:25:20,700
Well, we've been talking obviously about history and you're in, you know, AP classes now.

1542
01:25:20,700 --> 01:25:27,400
When you were in elementary school, you struggled a lot academically and we had to get tutoring

1543
01:25:27,400 --> 01:25:29,560
to stop you getting held back a year.

1544
01:25:29,560 --> 01:25:32,860
And I told you, I was so proud of you because you worked so hard.

1545
01:25:32,860 --> 01:25:37,320
And then, you know, the following couple of years, you really clawed your way back to

1546
01:25:37,320 --> 01:25:38,320
good grades.

1547
01:25:38,320 --> 01:25:42,800
And but then you go through the whole student athlete thing and you're identifying that

1548
01:25:42,800 --> 01:25:46,680
it's your athletics that are going to get you into college.

1549
01:25:46,680 --> 01:25:50,720
But then I think there's been a kind of awakening with you recently where you realize that academically

1550
01:25:50,720 --> 01:25:54,360
you can get into college, that you're smarter than you gave yourself credit for.

1551
01:25:54,360 --> 01:25:57,560
And I understand it because you struggled when you were younger and you were one of

1552
01:25:57,560 --> 01:26:00,480
the youngest kids in the year just because of your birthday.

1553
01:26:00,480 --> 01:26:03,560
So talk to me about that before we close out.

1554
01:26:03,560 --> 01:26:08,940
Has there been a shift where you've kind of acknowledged that you're smart and it doesn't

1555
01:26:08,940 --> 01:26:11,400
just have to be your sports to get you into school?

1556
01:26:11,400 --> 01:26:18,280
Yeah, like I'm always involving like freshman year, I took one honors class.

1557
01:26:18,280 --> 01:26:20,560
So I was regular, regular student.

1558
01:26:20,560 --> 01:26:22,960
Then sophomore year, I took all honors.

1559
01:26:22,960 --> 01:26:25,480
So I was involving in trying to challenge myself.

1560
01:26:25,480 --> 01:26:28,400
And last year, I took one AP class.

1561
01:26:28,400 --> 01:26:31,480
And now I'm taking six AP classes.

1562
01:26:31,480 --> 01:26:34,840
So I'm always constantly trying to improve myself and everything.

1563
01:26:34,840 --> 01:26:41,680
But one thing is that like the people in my classes, they're all smart and I think they

1564
01:26:41,680 --> 01:26:42,680
all have straight A's.

1565
01:26:42,680 --> 01:26:44,000
That's one thing I don't have.

1566
01:26:44,000 --> 01:26:45,800
I have A's and B's.

1567
01:26:45,800 --> 01:26:48,960
But that's the thing is they're only smart.

1568
01:26:48,960 --> 01:26:51,960
Like they don't have club volleyball until 11.

1569
01:26:51,960 --> 01:26:54,280
They can just study and I know them personally.

1570
01:26:54,280 --> 01:26:55,800
So I'm not saying just stereotyping.

1571
01:26:55,800 --> 01:26:56,800
I know them personally.

1572
01:26:56,800 --> 01:26:59,240
They all want to do is study.

1573
01:26:59,240 --> 01:27:00,240
That's it.

1574
01:27:00,240 --> 01:27:02,160
So I'm like, so I think that's one thing.

1575
01:27:02,160 --> 01:27:09,200
And you look back, it's like I am better myself outside school and inside of school.

1576
01:27:09,200 --> 01:27:10,200
Absolutely.

1577
01:27:10,200 --> 01:27:12,240
Well, I want to go to the last couple of closing questions.

1578
01:27:12,240 --> 01:27:17,400
But just before I do, because I was thinking this, we know obviously that, you know, that

1579
01:27:17,400 --> 01:27:20,720
I talk a lot about mental health and a lot of these people tend to be, you know, firefighters

1580
01:27:20,720 --> 01:27:26,320
and military, but like Emma, you know, there's a lot of people listening whose children are

1581
01:27:26,320 --> 01:27:30,720
in elementary, middle, you know, high school now.

1582
01:27:30,720 --> 01:27:39,280
What advice would you give other kids as far as their mental health, as far as, you know,

1583
01:27:39,280 --> 01:27:43,280
if they're feeling hopeless, you know, if they're feeling depressed, you know, the how

1584
01:27:43,280 --> 01:27:50,760
would you inspire them to find help or realize that they can grow from this?

1585
01:27:50,760 --> 01:27:55,600
Just like you did when you were, you know, out of the centers and you were your lowest

1586
01:27:55,600 --> 01:27:58,920
music probably like without knowing them personally.

1587
01:27:58,920 --> 01:28:02,120
Music is probably the best thing that connects everything.

1588
01:28:02,120 --> 01:28:03,400
That's like pretty sick.

1589
01:28:03,400 --> 01:28:06,240
That's probably the thing I miss most was not my phone during J.C.

1590
01:28:06,240 --> 01:28:13,800
It was music, I think, but not knowing them personally, even like movies or like cushion

1591
01:28:13,800 --> 01:28:15,200
things like a cushion movie.

1592
01:28:15,200 --> 01:28:18,040
I just do it and just crying.

1593
01:28:18,040 --> 01:28:20,840
Like one quote, I live by it's just push past your limits.

1594
01:28:20,840 --> 01:28:21,840
It's simple.

1595
01:28:21,840 --> 01:28:23,920
And I love it so much.

1596
01:28:23,920 --> 01:28:27,720
But in academics, like, OK, I can push my limits.

1597
01:28:27,720 --> 01:28:32,400
I can do this one more time, like one more hour of studying or I can push my limits past

1598
01:28:32,400 --> 01:28:34,820
my limits with these weights.

1599
01:28:34,820 --> 01:28:38,800
But not knowing them personally, music is probably the best thing that can help you

1600
01:28:38,800 --> 01:28:44,280
cry and help you feel inspired, just help you live your life.

1601
01:28:44,280 --> 01:28:46,920
We went to see NF at the beginning of the summer.

1602
01:28:46,920 --> 01:28:52,080
How much of an impact does his music have on your journey?

1603
01:28:52,080 --> 01:28:53,840
Amazing.

1604
01:28:53,840 --> 01:28:57,960
Like he has band issues.

1605
01:28:57,960 --> 01:29:04,800
So some issues I don't I mean, I don't understand or don't have or have very little of, I guess.

1606
01:29:04,800 --> 01:29:10,480
Because, I mean, even the death, you can say that's abandonment, like with Bill and everything.

1607
01:29:10,480 --> 01:29:13,800
But his music was very relatable, especially now I'm getting older.

1608
01:29:13,800 --> 01:29:16,880
I'm like, holy crap, that's very sad.

1609
01:29:16,880 --> 01:29:20,280
But I think actually this I probably it's a very happy song.

1610
01:29:20,280 --> 01:29:22,040
But it's like I cried to it so many times.

1611
01:29:22,040 --> 01:29:26,000
It's Three Little Birds by Bob Marley, because don't worry about a thing.

1612
01:29:26,000 --> 01:29:27,600
Everything's gonna be all right.

1613
01:29:27,600 --> 01:29:30,160
And that's a really happy song.

1614
01:29:30,160 --> 01:29:31,160
But NF was amazing.

1615
01:29:31,160 --> 01:29:35,000
I mean, you saw I was singing every lyric to the beat.

1616
01:29:35,000 --> 01:29:40,160
So yeah, because it's like anger and sadness and happiness.

1617
01:29:40,160 --> 01:29:47,120
And it's like every emotion you can ever think of is in his, not every emotion of course,

1618
01:29:47,120 --> 01:29:51,400
but there's so much emotion in his music.

1619
01:29:51,400 --> 01:29:55,280
How important is it for boys to understand they can cry?

1620
01:29:55,280 --> 01:29:57,160
Very like very important.

1621
01:29:57,160 --> 01:30:02,760
I mean, I think I haven't cried from my friends in a long time, because of centers.

1622
01:30:02,760 --> 01:30:06,680
But I think now I'm actually starting to let go of saying like no one's gonna get hospitalized

1623
01:30:06,680 --> 01:30:09,280
if I cry in front of people.

1624
01:30:09,280 --> 01:30:10,280
That took a while.

1625
01:30:10,280 --> 01:30:14,960
But yeah, it's very important to cry.

1626
01:30:14,960 --> 01:30:19,080
I cried from stress, I cried about NeNe and everything.

1627
01:30:19,080 --> 01:30:22,560
I mean, like I said, I never cry over girls or anything.

1628
01:30:22,560 --> 01:30:25,560
I just can't function, I guess.

1629
01:30:25,560 --> 01:30:31,480
Like compared to some other things that happen in my life, that breakup is important to me.

1630
01:30:31,480 --> 01:30:34,320
But I haven't witnessed real love, I guess.

1631
01:30:34,320 --> 01:30:36,720
I guess you can say because I've never been married.

1632
01:30:36,720 --> 01:30:38,960
I've never had that deep connection.

1633
01:30:38,960 --> 01:30:41,480
So that's probably why I haven't.

1634
01:30:41,480 --> 01:30:46,040
But crying feels good.

1635
01:30:46,040 --> 01:30:50,440
Like when you cry, those bad thoughts go away.

1636
01:30:50,440 --> 01:30:54,160
Like I've had times like, what if I just crashed my car?

1637
01:30:54,160 --> 01:30:57,800
I thought that so many times, not so many times, but I'm like, but then I just cry,

1638
01:30:57,800 --> 01:30:58,800
I'm like, oh, I'm better now.

1639
01:30:58,800 --> 01:30:59,800
Blah, blah, blah.

1640
01:30:59,800 --> 01:31:03,720
But if I crash my car, I can't myself when I feel that.

1641
01:31:03,720 --> 01:31:04,720
Yay.

1642
01:31:04,720 --> 01:31:05,720
So yeah.

1643
01:31:05,720 --> 01:31:10,120
Well, and I think that's the thing is a lot of people have, they call it the shadow self.

1644
01:31:10,120 --> 01:31:12,480
We have dark thoughts, all of us.

1645
01:31:12,480 --> 01:31:15,920
We do, which is why again, that person cuts in front of you.

1646
01:31:15,920 --> 01:31:17,920
As you know, I'm not a violent guy.

1647
01:31:17,920 --> 01:31:23,020
But as I've explained to you, as I even wrote in my books, when you've seen the horrible

1648
01:31:23,020 --> 01:31:27,560
things that happen in car accidents, bless you, Amber.

1649
01:31:27,560 --> 01:31:29,360
It makes you angry as a first responder.

1650
01:31:29,360 --> 01:31:32,160
So that's my thoughts.

1651
01:31:32,160 --> 01:31:37,180
But yeah, to be able to offload that is important.

1652
01:31:37,180 --> 01:31:40,880
One more thing, because you just spurred this as well.

1653
01:31:40,880 --> 01:31:47,320
After the centers, after you and all these other kids in Liberty were sent to the 72

1654
01:31:47,320 --> 01:31:54,000
hour hold for simply, a lot of them just being depressed or anxious.

1655
01:31:54,000 --> 01:31:58,080
What impact did that have on you trusting people and asking for help and being vulnerable

1656
01:31:58,080 --> 01:32:00,120
about your mental health in school?

1657
01:32:00,120 --> 01:32:02,160
Horrible, horrible trust issues.

1658
01:32:02,160 --> 01:32:05,800
Did it show motion, had a fake smile for so long.

1659
01:32:05,800 --> 01:32:11,680
Like, I mean, even now, like, it's funny, like, my last song was on music talk about

1660
01:32:11,680 --> 01:32:12,680
it.

1661
01:32:12,680 --> 01:32:14,360
Just like, I'm not really happy if I'm not really sad.

1662
01:32:14,360 --> 01:32:20,440
It's like the weird middle that like I have fun days, but also have, it's just really

1663
01:32:20,440 --> 01:32:21,440
weird.

1664
01:32:21,440 --> 01:32:24,720
And, but it was horrible though.

1665
01:32:24,720 --> 01:32:28,200
Like I can't show emotion.

1666
01:32:28,200 --> 01:32:34,120
No, I definitely showed like happiness and everything, but never show sadness or cry

1667
01:32:34,120 --> 01:32:35,120
in front of anybody.

1668
01:32:35,120 --> 01:32:41,080
It's actually probably recently I cried in front of someone because it was stress, it

1669
01:32:41,080 --> 01:32:42,680
was school related.

1670
01:32:42,680 --> 01:32:49,240
But yeah, it was iconic PTSD I guess you can say.

1671
01:32:49,240 --> 01:32:50,240
Like very.

1672
01:32:50,240 --> 01:32:51,240
Oh yeah, it was PTSD.

1673
01:32:51,240 --> 01:32:53,240
You were kidnapped for three days.

1674
01:32:53,240 --> 01:32:55,920
I mean, yeah, it absolutely was.

1675
01:32:55,920 --> 01:33:00,400
You know, I mean, the term PTSD, you weren't in the corner, you know, in a ball every time

1676
01:33:00,400 --> 01:33:05,400
you heard loud noise, but yeah, that I watched it, you know, even on me, like you were stolen

1677
01:33:05,400 --> 01:33:06,600
from me for three days.

1678
01:33:06,600 --> 01:33:12,080
So yeah, that had a huge negative impact, but I just wanted to underline that because

1679
01:33:12,080 --> 01:33:16,280
the police officers out there, for example, that feel like they can't say how they're

1680
01:33:16,280 --> 01:33:20,400
feeling that they're struggling because they might take their gun away and their badge

1681
01:33:20,400 --> 01:33:23,960
and put them on, you know, whatever duty.

1682
01:33:23,960 --> 01:33:28,560
When you have a fear based system, when it comes to mental health, you're not going to

1683
01:33:28,560 --> 01:33:29,560
make it better.

1684
01:33:29,560 --> 01:33:30,560
You're going to make it worse.

1685
01:33:30,560 --> 01:33:32,880
And this is important for schools to understand.

1686
01:33:32,880 --> 01:33:37,880
If you do what Liberty Middle School was doing a few years ago, you will damage your children,

1687
01:33:37,880 --> 01:33:38,880
not help them.

1688
01:33:38,880 --> 01:33:39,880
Yeah, I agree.

1689
01:33:39,880 --> 01:33:40,880
All right.

1690
01:33:40,880 --> 01:33:46,520
Well, then we talked about Bethany and Captain Hook, whose real name I still can't remember,

1691
01:33:46,520 --> 01:33:50,680
you know, some of the people that you told me to get on the show and we made it happen.

1692
01:33:50,680 --> 01:33:57,400
Are there any other people that you would recommend as a guest that we haven't had yet?

1693
01:33:57,400 --> 01:33:58,400
Elton John.

1694
01:33:58,400 --> 01:34:01,480
Elton John would be cool as hell, wouldn't he?

1695
01:34:01,480 --> 01:34:03,480
Yeah, I feel like that.

1696
01:34:03,480 --> 01:34:05,360
Like being an inspiration.

1697
01:34:05,360 --> 01:34:08,560
I mean, I watched this movie so many times.

1698
01:34:08,560 --> 01:34:13,720
Very sad and it's kind of like similar Freddie Mercury, how he had corruption because he

1699
01:34:13,720 --> 01:34:19,280
was getting popular and everything in his life and being, of course, homosexual.

1700
01:34:19,280 --> 01:34:20,280
Yeah, homosexual.

1701
01:34:20,280 --> 01:34:24,560
I was about to say homophobic, but that's different.

1702
01:34:24,560 --> 01:34:25,560
The opposite.

1703
01:34:25,560 --> 01:34:26,560
Yeah.

1704
01:34:26,560 --> 01:34:30,320
Being homosexual during the time and that was very still.

1705
01:34:30,320 --> 01:34:31,320
That's not a thing.

1706
01:34:31,320 --> 01:34:34,040
Hide it kind of thing.

1707
01:34:34,040 --> 01:34:35,040
He's such an inspiration.

1708
01:34:35,040 --> 01:34:42,880
He, Arabi loves him, I think that's one thing that actually unifies and people is music,

1709
01:34:42,880 --> 01:34:49,120
like jazz unified black people, white people back in the day because it was just how we

1710
01:34:49,120 --> 01:34:52,560
liked it and it still unifies everyone today.

1711
01:34:52,560 --> 01:34:53,560
Absolutely.

1712
01:34:53,560 --> 01:34:54,560
Yeah.

1713
01:34:54,560 --> 01:34:56,440
And he's done a lot of good with this platform.

1714
01:34:56,440 --> 01:34:59,520
Like the AIDS Foundation, I think it is, he contributes a lot.

1715
01:34:59,520 --> 01:35:00,920
Yeah, he's done so much good.

1716
01:35:00,920 --> 01:35:01,920
I mean, he's, you know.

1717
01:35:01,920 --> 01:35:02,920
The Mercury program, right?

1718
01:35:02,920 --> 01:35:03,920
Mercury program?

1719
01:35:03,920 --> 01:35:04,920
I'm not sure.

1720
01:35:04,920 --> 01:35:06,720
Yeah, yeah, I'm not sure.

1721
01:35:06,720 --> 01:35:10,680
But yeah, I mean, he, you know, Princess Di used to love him because she was a very big

1722
01:35:10,680 --> 01:35:11,680
altruist as well.

1723
01:35:11,680 --> 01:35:14,720
So yeah, one day we got John Travolta, didn't we?

1724
01:35:14,720 --> 01:35:16,000
So maybe we can get Elton John.

1725
01:35:16,000 --> 01:35:17,000
We'll see.

1726
01:35:17,000 --> 01:35:18,000
You met him.

1727
01:35:18,000 --> 01:35:19,000
All right.

1728
01:35:19,000 --> 01:35:25,880
Well, then let me see the last question before we let people know where to find you on Instagram.

1729
01:35:25,880 --> 01:35:31,200
Doesn't mean that you're going to accept their request, but what do you do to decompress?

1730
01:35:31,200 --> 01:35:34,320
What do you do to relax these days?

1731
01:35:34,320 --> 01:35:38,720
Like I mean, it's known as like brain rot, but I just scroll through TikTok.

1732
01:35:38,720 --> 01:35:39,720
Yeah.

1733
01:35:39,720 --> 01:35:44,960
Like that's actually one thing that's kind of curious about is the attention span of

1734
01:35:44,960 --> 01:35:48,000
kids is going down by a lot.

1735
01:35:48,000 --> 01:35:49,000
I'm not for me.

1736
01:35:49,000 --> 01:35:51,840
I just watch TikTok because YouTube is kind of boring, to be honest.

1737
01:35:51,840 --> 01:35:53,920
And like when I'm really tired, I don't want to watch Netflix.

1738
01:35:53,920 --> 01:35:55,720
I don't want to fall asleep.

1739
01:35:55,720 --> 01:35:58,640
This is kind of like the thing that if I fall asleep on it, it doesn't matter.

1740
01:35:58,640 --> 01:36:03,520
I'm not going to lose anything, but yeah, I just decompress to that because video games

1741
01:36:03,520 --> 01:36:04,880
are kind of boring to me.

1742
01:36:04,880 --> 01:36:12,200
Like when I was straining my wrist during surfing, I was so bored playing video games

1743
01:36:12,200 --> 01:36:13,520
all day and watching TV all day.

1744
01:36:13,520 --> 01:36:16,040
I was like, oh my God, how do people live like this?

1745
01:36:16,040 --> 01:36:18,360
Not insult, but it's not for me.

1746
01:36:18,360 --> 01:36:19,360
Yeah.

1747
01:36:19,360 --> 01:36:22,480
When you say about attention span, I see that and it's not just kids.

1748
01:36:22,480 --> 01:36:23,760
It's us, it's adults.

1749
01:36:23,760 --> 01:36:30,280
But I see now that like, for example, if someone makes a, you know, might only be a 30 second

1750
01:36:30,280 --> 01:36:31,320
video.

1751
01:36:31,320 --> 01:36:36,000
Now they have like the teaser of the video at the beginning of the video to get you to

1752
01:36:36,000 --> 01:36:38,720
watch the other 25 seconds of the video.

1753
01:36:38,720 --> 01:36:42,000
And I can see, I can see this whole attention span getting worse and worse.

1754
01:36:42,000 --> 01:36:43,680
Oh, we can't just have a podcast.

1755
01:36:43,680 --> 01:36:47,400
Let me flash pictures of what the person's saying.

1756
01:36:47,400 --> 01:36:53,080
Like if we can't sit there and watch a video of someone talking for 90 seconds, then God,

1757
01:36:53,080 --> 01:36:54,080
where is it going to end?

1758
01:36:54,080 --> 01:36:56,560
It's going to literally end up as a film called Idiocracy.

1759
01:36:56,560 --> 01:36:59,160
We're literally heading that way where we're just going to be so dumb.

1760
01:36:59,160 --> 01:37:01,760
We're not even going to be able to string a sentence together.

1761
01:37:01,760 --> 01:37:05,080
And we like wallow those humans and wallow.

1762
01:37:05,080 --> 01:37:06,640
Yeah, Wally.

1763
01:37:06,640 --> 01:37:07,640
Wally.

1764
01:37:07,640 --> 01:37:08,640
Sorry.

1765
01:37:08,640 --> 01:37:09,640
All right.

1766
01:37:09,640 --> 01:37:14,040
Is there anything else you want to say to the people listening before we close out?

1767
01:37:14,040 --> 01:37:15,040
Hmm.

1768
01:37:15,040 --> 01:37:16,040
That's good.

1769
01:37:16,040 --> 01:37:20,240
That's a good question.

1770
01:37:20,240 --> 01:37:23,480
Time purpose in your life.

1771
01:37:23,480 --> 01:37:28,560
That's such an easy thing to say.

1772
01:37:28,560 --> 01:37:32,400
But I mean, for me, I want to live a life where I don't have to waste my time because

1773
01:37:32,400 --> 01:37:36,200
the thing about wasting my time is you're bored and I don't want to live a boring life.

1774
01:37:36,200 --> 01:37:41,520
I want to live a life where I wake up and I mean, my dream is to live in a cabin.

1775
01:37:41,520 --> 01:37:46,800
But that's the amazing view and have a job that I love.

1776
01:37:46,800 --> 01:37:52,160
Yeah, and try to do your best.

1777
01:37:52,160 --> 01:37:55,640
Like that sounds so simple, but that's one of the best things.

1778
01:37:55,640 --> 01:37:58,240
That's so simple, but it's so true.

1779
01:37:58,240 --> 01:37:59,680
It's do your best in life.

1780
01:37:59,680 --> 01:38:04,600
And if you can't, then ask your people to help.

1781
01:38:04,600 --> 01:38:10,960
And another thing is that don't be afraid to let go of people that you've known for

1782
01:38:10,960 --> 01:38:15,760
a while or don't get pushed into anything.

1783
01:38:15,760 --> 01:38:22,000
But yeah, I think that's the thing I can think of right now without taking too long of silence.

1784
01:38:22,000 --> 01:38:25,200
Well, I want to say thank you.

1785
01:38:25,200 --> 01:38:26,560
This has been amazing.

1786
01:38:26,560 --> 01:38:27,720
We talked about this for a while.

1787
01:38:27,720 --> 01:38:31,800
I'm going to obviously get Becky on when she's graduating from medical school as well.

1788
01:38:31,800 --> 01:38:36,680
But this was an important conversation because when we get to the summer, you're going to

1789
01:38:36,680 --> 01:38:40,800
be ramping up to possibly go to Utah.

1790
01:38:40,800 --> 01:38:43,040
But yeah, it's such an important perspective.

1791
01:38:43,040 --> 01:38:48,800
And for you being brave enough to talk about some of the low points, I hope that someone

1792
01:38:48,800 --> 01:38:52,360
listening out there, like I always say, if it helps one person, if there's one kid out

1793
01:38:52,360 --> 01:38:56,480
there, one parent who knows their child is going through it, that this will help.

1794
01:38:56,480 --> 01:39:00,840
Over and above all the fun stuff that we talked about, I think it's been really important.

1795
01:39:00,840 --> 01:39:04,320
And just know that I am extremely proud of you.

1796
01:39:04,320 --> 01:39:08,160
And it's going to break my damn heart when you do go to Utah.

1797
01:39:08,160 --> 01:39:11,280
Becky's going to have to hold me for like three months straight.

1798
01:39:11,280 --> 01:39:12,280
So thank you.

1799
01:39:12,280 --> 01:39:13,280
Of course.

1800
01:39:13,280 --> 01:39:15,400
I do have one more question.

1801
01:39:15,400 --> 01:39:19,040
Why do you think people can't hold eye contact anymore?

1802
01:39:19,040 --> 01:39:22,280
I think Becky was actually saying this.

1803
01:39:22,280 --> 01:39:26,400
She thinks that some of the meanness, and this is probably related to eye contact because

1804
01:39:26,400 --> 01:39:29,600
it's harder to be mean to someone when they're looking you in the eyes.

1805
01:39:29,600 --> 01:39:30,600
You know what I mean?

1806
01:39:30,600 --> 01:39:34,200
So I think it's the social media, it's the devices.

1807
01:39:34,200 --> 01:39:39,880
And I was talking to the guest today, a lot of the nastiness, the nastiness that you see

1808
01:39:39,880 --> 01:39:42,160
on social media isn't your generation.

1809
01:39:42,160 --> 01:39:43,700
It's my generation.

1810
01:39:43,700 --> 01:39:45,360
All the politics and all that stuff.

1811
01:39:45,360 --> 01:39:46,360
All people.

1812
01:39:46,360 --> 01:39:47,360
All people.

1813
01:39:47,360 --> 01:39:52,180
But so there isn't any accountability.

1814
01:39:52,180 --> 01:39:54,040
There isn't any eye contact there.

1815
01:39:54,040 --> 01:39:58,200
And then I think COVID didn't help because all of a sudden you're behind masks and big

1816
01:39:58,200 --> 01:40:00,520
plastic screens.

1817
01:40:00,520 --> 01:40:04,820
So everyone's going to the automated checkout instead of the human being.

1818
01:40:04,820 --> 01:40:08,520
So I think it's something that we have to find again, because eye contact, as you know,

1819
01:40:08,520 --> 01:40:09,520
is so important.

1820
01:40:09,520 --> 01:40:10,520
Yeah, I agree.

1821
01:40:10,520 --> 01:40:12,960
But thank you for having me.

1822
01:40:12,960 --> 01:40:14,960
A thousand, that's crazy.

1823
01:40:14,960 --> 01:40:20,560
I remember when you, your first one, you're in my room in a little chair or something.

1824
01:40:20,560 --> 01:40:23,240
Yes, the little baby chair and table set.

1825
01:40:23,240 --> 01:40:25,680
Yeah, so I'm proud of you.

1826
01:40:25,680 --> 01:40:30,680
You came so far and you have been yourself ever since.

1827
01:40:30,680 --> 01:40:32,000
As you know, I'm your son.

1828
01:40:32,000 --> 01:40:36,780
So I know if you're not being yourself, but you're being true, still passionate as ever

1829
01:40:36,780 --> 01:40:40,440
and you're not letting anyone's opinion push you down.

1830
01:40:40,440 --> 01:40:43,000
So I think that's so inspirational.

1831
01:40:43,000 --> 01:40:47,000
And you inspire so many people.

1832
01:40:47,000 --> 01:40:49,640
I don't know your audience that well.

1833
01:40:49,640 --> 01:40:53,880
I'm just a guess.

1834
01:40:53,880 --> 01:40:59,240
But the people that are listening, he's an amazing person.

1835
01:40:59,240 --> 01:41:05,080
And if he inspires you, then you keep listening to him because he will always tell the truth.

1836
01:41:05,080 --> 01:41:07,560
And I won't lie about that.

1837
01:41:07,560 --> 01:41:14,160
He knows what he's trying to say and he will always fight for you all because that's what

1838
01:41:14,160 --> 01:41:15,160
is in his blood.

1839
01:41:15,160 --> 01:41:19,080
And if there's God, that's what God wants him to do.

1840
01:41:19,080 --> 01:41:39,400
He's got me crying now.