Welcome to Root Words. I'm Michelle Root and on this podcast we will embark on a journey
of self-discovery while appreciating the complexities of language through etymology,
the study of words. Each episode we will explore the origins of a specific word, how it can
influence our spiritual, mental, physical, and emotional well-being. I want to help us
dive into the intersections of language and life so we can contribute to a common understanding.
Let's uncover the power of language together. One word at a time. This is Root Words.
Welcome back to Root Words. I'm Michelle Root and before we get started with the episode today,
I wanted to just give my immense gratitude for everyone who tuned into the introductory episode
last week. This has truly been a labor of love and to see the reception, the feedback, the advice,
and just the pure love that I've been shown just over this past week alone has been so
validating for me. I'm not going to lie, it is terrifying to get on a podcast and hear your voice
broadcasted to many people wondering if the words are going to resonate in land where they need to.
Those are all things that I've been running through my mind and honestly, instead of over
analyzing it all, I just jumped right in. And to have the reception that I've gotten so far
has been absolutely amazing. So again, from the bottom of my heart, thank you so much for
tuning into this podcast. I hope to see you more in the future. I hope to create more content with
you and for you. As I said in my intro episode, I'm learning with you, I'm growing with you,
and I genuinely cannot wait to start this journey with you all. With that being said,
it ultimately brings me to the point of our very first full-length episode, the word existentialism.
Dictionary.com defines it as the philosophical belief that we are each responsible for creating
a level of meaning and purpose in our own lives. And unfortunately, with that responsibility,
can sometimes carry a level of anguish and dread. The concepts of existentialism were originally
founded in 1800s by philosopher Soren Kierkegaard. Alongside famed philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche,
the foundations of modern-day existentialism were formed. It wasn't until the 1940s when
French philosopher Gabriel Marcelle introduced the actual term existentialism. When Marcelle
introduced the term to another famed French philosopher Jean-Paul Sartre, he initially rejected
the notion, not fully understanding the magnitude of the concept. He ultimately had a change of
heart, and after writing the book, existentialism is a humanism, on October 29th, Sartre, alongside
Nietzsche, became one of the most well-known existential philosophers of our time. The root
word of existentialism is exist, so it's no surprise that the concept itself means to live
or to have reality. I found the difference between existentialism and exist to be rather fascinating.
Fascinating in the sense that existentialism focuses on the awareness of free will and
responsibility in one's old life. While exist, a verb simply means the action of being. It's
reminiscent of the times where you would look down at your hands and realize with full capacity that
you are truly just a soul within a body. Operating neural pathways within a brain that you're
controlling, it starts to splinter from that where you're thinking about how did you get here,
why are you here, what is everyone's purpose and meaning in life, and it can become so consuming
to think about because the scale is so large, the scale is so infinite, you compare your existence to
that of a trillion stars and planets in the sky, so much so that it all becomes so irrelevant.
And I think that's hard for a lot of people to process, and it turns into a rabbit hole that
many of us are not prepared to navigate. If you think about that for too long, it puts your mind
into this weird liminal space of being aware of reality while also existing within it. So the way
I kind of remedy that is to come back to my own consciousness, ground myself in my reality, and
understand that no matter how big or small my existence may be, I can find my own value in
the things that I choose to honor, the way I choose to represent myself, and how I choose to engage
with my environment and the things around me. I found it so interesting during my last birthday
where I was at a very reflective period in my life looking at both the past and present in tandem.
Where I was looking down at my turbulent child and young adult, you know, really reflecting on the
traumas that I've been through, the life experiences that I've gone through that really shaped who I
am as a person now, while also on the flip side, excitedly gazing towards the hopefully more mature
and fulfilling future that awaits me. Now, I honestly love this duality because having the full
spectrum of perception is absolutely invaluable to our existence. It's such a profound thing to
be able to bear witness to. Being in this reflective space and duality really has you focusing on your
perceived accomplishments and failures. I feel like that's pretty common though once you get to a
certain point in your life, you can't help but weigh negative and positive aspects. One of the
biggest accomplishments in my own personal life is my children. I was a very young teen mom who was
thrown into the world of parenthood very quickly while I was myself still learning and growing
as a child. And to look back at the point in life when I first found out that I was going to be a
young mom unsure of how I was going to manifest this new reality, how I was going to navigate it.
I didn't have much of the life skills myself to get through my own childhood, let alone bringing
another person into this realm to guide and lead and love. It was a daunting task and fast forward
to now where I can't help but reflect on all the accomplishments my family has achieved. It evokes
within me such a huge sense of pride and amazement. I never could have imagined being at this space now.
Little Michelle, I'm so immensely proud of you and all you've done. Now, naturally, I'm not as
excited to talk about the less than desirable parts of my life. Past addiction struggles to
friendships lost due to misunderstanding, discourse, or simply just falling apart from each other.
All these transformative lessons and heavy emotions they evoke come from a place of dismay
rather than shame, as I know that these things deserve grace and forgiveness towards myself.
Both the positive and negative aspects shape our whole reality and existence. Grasping this
is the epitome of existentialism in the sense that I am fully aware of all aspects of my will.
Now, I started this project because I honestly have been entering an involuntary existential crisis
of sorts. It didn't really feel negative solely, but the urgency and the gnawing need to create
was not something I could shake. I'm a very creative person. I love to share my ideas and
thoughts. I like to paint, write, draw anything that can get out what is inside of my soul,
to be expressive, to be a tangible piece of work that I can produce to show the world what is inside
my soul. So not always having that outlet can prove very detrimental for me. No, I know we'll
have different meanings of what purpose means for our lives, but for me personally, if I don't have
my own centered sense of purpose living day by day with a goal, I feel hopelessly lost. I need
some sort of direction or guidance, whether it's outwardly or from internal sources to feel a sense
of purpose. And you may not share in that idea. That's fine. I just from my own personal standpoint,
I need something of greater value and purpose to be always actively working upon. Otherwise,
I personally would get depressed, lost, anxious, just feel like I'm wandering aimlessly through
life. Now, I've always felt I've operated from a pretty optimistic perspective. I don't
necessarily always feel hopeless, but I do feel aimless. And that can be just as draining and
frustrating to deal with, to be confused about what you're supposed to be doing and attaching your
accomplishments to tangible things that your soul would consider substance. I felt like my internal
being has been screaming at me for bigger, more meaningful tasks. Honestly, if you know, you know
exactly what I'm talking about, it's hard to explain to someone that does not understand that
just sitting back and relaxing sometimes can drive you mad. You have to always be actively
creating and producing something. And that is something that I have to work on within myself.
I don't feel like that's always a healthy way to approach life. I feel like we all go through
this level of disconnect at different stages of our lives, wandering and wondering if we're living
our life's true meaning. When we leave high school, we wonder if we have any sense of direction to
lead us successfully into adulthood. We know we don't know anything and we're being thrown at
life's door. After our 20s are over and the high of being a young adult wears thin, we wonder if
we're prepared for the next level of responsibilities. You can't help but wonder if you've done enough
in the previous time period to feel a sense of worth. And you can't help but think if you've
wasted time and now find yourselves in a countdown of sorts to the inevitable end of our time here
on this earth. I feel like when you can subjectively look at both your accomplishments and failures,
you're really able to gauge where you need to direct your energy and where you're being siphoned
for it. Now recently I came across a video challenging the notion of needing to have purpose
within one's life and simply existing was purpose enough. I agree and disagree with this in the sense
that living, experiencing and breathing life is essentially purpose in of itself. Of course,
we can find meanings to things that we attach our successes to, but isn't making it day by day in
this chaotic world and accomplishment in of itself? Where did this idea stem from that we have to
create tangible things to be successful or productive? Now without diving too deep into the
topic, to me it seems like capitalism has formed this way of thought. Its omnipresence permeates
every aspect of our lives and it no doubt contributes to the anguish and grief mentioned in the
definition of existentialism. If we remove the expectations placed on us by a capitalistic
society, we're left with the opportunity of doing things out of a desire rather than a need.
A lot of creatives may be able to relate to the idea that when you're forced to create a project
your heart's just not in it. A final product isn't as good as how do you been able to approach it
with unbridled and unrestricted energy? So a good question to ask ourselves is does forcing
purpose in our lives create the lack of purpose? Also, it begs the question, if something is
inauthentic is it also lacking validity? The answers to these questions vary as we all have
alternating perspectives and ideals about life. Ultimately, you have to define what purpose
means for you personally and with that what is the basis of your purpose in life? Existentialism
relies heavily on the notion that no deity or higher being is involved in our lives and that we alone
carry the daunting task of living with meaning. Now whether you're a theist, an agnostic, or an
atheist, the thought of being in control of your life 100% of the time is a very sobering thought.
Having divine intervention brings the comfort of sorts, a feeling that you're not alone in the
world and the choices that you make. Alternatively, having divine intervention influence aspects of
your life may feel stifling and have you lacking a sense of control over your own destiny. For me,
liminality wins again in the sense that I like to adopt the best of both worlds. I believe I hold
dominion over my existence but I also choose to believe that divine intervention is present,
providing guidance and support rather than dictation and domination. It's just a personal
perspective of mine. I support all ways of thought as long as it aligns with the elevation of humanity
as a whole. At the end of the day, whether we believe in the influence of deities or ourselves,
having the ability to reflect on the impact we make on the world around us, aids in the
elevation of us all as a species, we improve, we refine, we ascend. I'll leave you today with a
quote from one of the greatest directors of the 20th century, Stanley Kubrick.
Thank you for learning with me today as we explored our first word. It's truly eye-opening to realize
how vast our existence can be, especially when we bring intentional focus to it.
Please join me on the next episode where we uncover the unplanned fortunate discovery of the word
serendipity. I'm Michelle Root and this is Root Words.